#lmao this took like 3ish hours

[biscuit-munchies]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE ONE AND ONLY YAMCHA!!! some of my favorite frames below

[millepara]

bye for now...

I DIDN'T cry in the arcade, I swear I didn't, depending on what your definition of crying is. lmao. I knew my eyes were less dry than usual but no one else would have.

I'm surprised, shocked even, that all three cabinets were still working. as mentioned here and there, I haven't been able to play for various reasons for a long time, so I have no idea how many people are still playing here. all I knew is from Luna posting about her trip where she encountered various defunct cabinets. I assumed that the ones at my home arcade would be the same. I guess that's the difference between tokyo and osaka at work... admittedly my arcade is hardly the top pretty series arcade in osaka, though. it's closest to the station so it's frequented by a lot of tourists etc passing through to spectate, which means it gets loud/a little unpleasant sometimes, which probably drives away most of the serious (?) primagi players (and those of other games too). but I can handle that if it means I'm not having to pack up all my cards and eject my usb and move after every single game.

anyway, none of that matters because I'm moving out of osaka and primagi is moving out of existence. the whole 3ish? hours I played today not a single other person came to play primagi until I was packing up to go. I was able to play and record everything I wanted to without being rushed or distracted or whatever. I almost didn't go at all because I'm moving next tuesday and it feels really irresponsible to go to the city and play at the arcade for hours this close, but... while packing I found a lithium ion battery that had swelled up into a mouse-sized pillow and the only place in the goddamn prefecture that will dispose of sick batteries happens to be a 20-minute walk away from my arcade. so I had no choice but to go!

luckily I set aside some coords & MAGIC☆VITAMIN's ids just in case back when I packed my pretty series box, so I already had that ready in my bag! kind of wish I'd gone over all of my coords a little better or picked coords that matched each other better, but I was focused on packing quickly at the time, and I didn't even use one of the coords I brought, so that doesn't even qualify as a regret. a little closer to a regret is how my larger usb did that thing where it gets too excited and stops recording in the middle of my game, so I spent the the last half of my arcade time muttering please please please PLEASE keep recording dont freak out you can do it come on come on--but it always does this so in a way, it was just like old times. back in the arcade with my wretched usb at my side. I got everything I wanted to record in one piece, at least, though it took a couple tries sometimes.

I was planning on only getting friend cards because I love looking at them and I don't need to start collecting coords on my final day of playing the game lmao, but!! I forgot or didn't know there are pretty rhythm coords in primagi!! I knew about the pripara and prichan ones, but other than Mirai's they were mostly stuff I don't care abt seeing on my idols... but the pretty rhythm ones!! they added so many details and definition to update the coords for primagi, and I love looking at that sort of thing!! I only did extra shopping one time when pure premium wedding and rainbow 7th coord showed up in the same game, and then with the random cards you get at the end of the game I managed to finish both, as you can see at the beginning of this post :)

I ended up playing an extra game with Milk because I wanted to see her in the wedding dress, and I was planning on playing one final game with Biscuit, but then... well, I'm totally unaware of the new songs aside from Miruki's Puzzle Buzz one, so I just chose the Himeme/Mychara Girls duet because I wanted to see a Milk/Biscuit pretty rhythm duo, and.... oh my god. it was the cutest song in the world, even (impossibly!) cuter than Buzzle. my idols got engaged......... in pretty rhythm wedding dresses..... . it seemed like too perfect a place to finish my primagi career (and I had to record it twice bc of my usb) (and I didn't particularly have any coord/song in mind to use for Biscuit after that) (and right after hearing morning and gift in the arcade after so long it was a direct hit to my idol emotions) so I finished up and went home.

I'm really glad I got to play one last time. I had already resigned myself to the fact that I just wouldn't get to, that's how it had to be and it sucks that I'm moving at the same time, and I figured it would be fine because I haven't been able to play regularly. but I feel so relieved since I went! I'm going to the middle of nowhere so I won't be able to play aipri verse regularly even if I want to (tbd), so I think this nice long farewell concert helped me feel ok about primagi ending and moving away and whatever aipri is going to be instead of just like... it's inevitable, so oh well.

I haven't had time to check the vids yet. fingers crossed that they turned out fine...

[its-a-hil]

ok. random question. literally from the random question generator at randomwordgenerator dot cahm: What's your go-to funny story now, but was horrendous at that moment?

(i think it gave me a question i already know but eh shoot)

hm.

alright i think this is actually more of the reverse than the forward direction, but sure

when i was in middle school, i was such a horrible procrastinator (note: i am still one of those) that i often wrote rough drafts of essays during lunch

(the one year in middle school i didnt do this was when i had english 1st period. tbh i wish my schedule had worked out like that all 3 years, but alas)

but i got so comfortable just throwing out words with a pencil that i kept doing it and now i almost never edit anything bc i need to write it all in one go or it's wrong

but final drafts still had to be typed & printed, so it was only my rough drafts that were like this

fast forward to high school, and rough drafts became less of a thing

my compulsion to procrastinate did not.

oh also relevant here is that i was emotionally incapable of asking for an extension or submitting online after class or anything

so.

senior year of high school. we had an essay to write on Twelfth Night, where we had to pick a word that was repeated a few times and discuss its effect on the story

i picked 'fancy' and used it to argue the absolute bullshit point that it meant the whole thing was a dream, because i had no other ideas and my brain refused to set aside time to do something more reasonable

except.

i did not begin writing until lunch of that day.

i did not have access to the computer lab i had planned to write the essay in.

i pleaded with a friend to lend me his laptop, on which i did the most frantic writing of my life. i dont remember if i ate any food during that lunch period.

(according to my diary i also said something shitty to that friend even as he was doing me a massive favor, which. god.)

looking at the document now (ty google drive), it seems that i didnt actually finish the essay, just wrote notes on the different uses of the word

im not sure if it was just a rough draft or notes kind of thing that was due, or if i lucked out and the essay was extended or something? unclear

but what is clear is that i wrote 440 words in just over an hour, and that's not counting the quotes i had to transcribe (which also made up over 400 words)

the following night i turned it into an actual 750ish word essay in also about an hour, bc. yeah. (i still didn't write an intro until i printed it out during study hall the next day lmao)

so anyway the essay was shit, the teacher was genuinely confused and pulled me aside after the class where she handed the essays back

note: she was also the theater teacher & that semester i was doing the play afterschool, and i think she knew i was better than what i handed in

:/

in my defense i was fairly depressed that couple of months, partially due to an responsibility that i did not realize i could easily say no to. the only consequence that refusing that responsibility would have had is that i would have hated myself less and possibly liked engineering more

oh also looking at my diary apparently that was also the week that i taught precalc bc the teacher's partner was suddenly out for paternity leave and i had an essentially free period during the precalc class

so yeah that's probably the third most interesting week of my senior after the week that we had the play performances and the week i was out in the hospital when my lungs spontaneously collapsed

the funniest part of that story is that it took me another 3ish years to realize that i wanted to be a teacher, and another 2 years after that to act on that desire. lmao

anyway bc im sure you freaks want to see it, im putting the essay under the cut

Actual essay:

Twelfth Night is one of Shakespeare’s most fantastical plays. Even without the use of magic, the supposedly realistic events are completely improbable. There is evidence that the play was intended to be a fantasy, and throughout the play, the word “fancy” is used to suggest to the audience that the events of the play are little more than a fanciful construction of Orsino’s mind. 

Orsino speaks four of the six instances of “fancy” or “fantasy.” Two of these instances come in his first monologue, right at the beginning of the play. He claims that “so full of shapes is fancy that it alone is high fantastical” (1.1.14-15). As Adams says, in this passage Orsino claims “that his own imagination is so fertile that it is supremely capricious and whimsical.” (Adams 58). It is odd that the play would start with this double mention of fancy, especially when the word is not mentioned again until the end of Act two. It is even stranger that the plot concludes with Orsino making Viola/Cesario his “fancy’s queen” (5.1.415). Although Feste finishes the play with his final song, this line is the last spoken by any other character, and is a natural conclusion to the play nonetheless. There must be a reason why the play both begins and ends with a word only used six times throughout. This is the most direct clue that the play does not merely describe events in Shakespeare’s mind, but instead describes events in Orsino’s mind. 

More clues can be found by examining the other uses of fancy in the play. Sebastian remarks “Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep” after encountering a smitten, and unfamiliar Olivia (4.1.65). This line comes in one of the more fantastical scenes in the play, where Sebastian enters Illyria and is mistaken by everyone for Cesario. Sebastian can only conclude “this is a dream,” and calls upon fancy - imagination - to keep him from waking up. Sebastian addresses fancy as a powerful being, that has the ability to manipulate the world he sees. If the play does take place in Orsino’s imagination, fancy would have this power. Another thing to note about Sebastian’s mention of fancy is that it is in reference to Olivia. Her love for him, and reproach of the men who were dueling him, is the only reason he would want to continue living in this dream.

Olivia is a common subject of fancy, as used in its alternate definition of love. Malvolio, just before seeing Maria’s letter, thinks aloud that “should [Olivia] fancy, it should be one of my complexion” (2.5.24-25). Almost all references to fancy are directly related to Olivia. In fact, every major male character, except her uncle, is in love with Olivia. It is difficult for Orsino to conceive of a character who is not enamored when in the presence of the beautiful lady Olivia.  To him, when Olivia enters, “heaven walks on earth” (5.1.99). 

Regarding the rest of Malvolio’s scene, it is no less strange than Sebastian’s. The dour puritan begins with a statement of love for his lady, and then follows the insane directions of a letter that apparently describes her love for him, while the pranksters hide and watch in a nearby bush. Orsino’s mentions of “fancy” also take place in strange scenes. Without touching on the chaotic mess that is 5.1, 1.1 regards a Duke, who has been laid low grieving over his unrequited love for Olivia. She, in turn, decides not to admit any suitors until she has spent seven entire years mourning her dead brother. This scene feels almost surreal, setting the stage for the play that is to follow. Since almost every instance of the word fancy comes during a surreal scene, it can be inferred that the word is an indicator - a message to the audience that this play is a fantasy in the mind of Orsino.

There is one more use of “fancy,” however. During the argument between Orsino and Viola, Orsino speaks of men’s fancies as “more longing, wavering… than women’s are” (2.4.41-42). Twelfth Night is certainly long, spanning three months in Illyria, and the play constantly wavers from uplifting to demeaning, from reasonable to insane. The play as a whole fits so well with Orsino’s description of his “fancies” that one must wonder why that particular description was used. Interpreting Twelfth Night as a fancy conjured up by Orsino’s stricken mind makes a good deal more sense than attempting to reconcile the events with the real world. 

Work Cited:Adams, B. (1978). Orsino and the Spirit of Love: Text, Syntax, and Sense In Twelfth Night, I. i. 1-15. Shakespeare Quarterly,29(1), 52-59. doi:10.2307/2869169

The notes i wrote during the lunch period:

The first appearance of the word comes during Orsino’s monologue. The grief-stricken man describes his lovesickness by referring to his imagining of fantasies involving Olivia. Fancy is “full of shapes” to hear him tell it, filled with all kinds of images (1.1.14). This implies an interesting idea of the plot; it may be nothing more than a lovesick dream conjured by Orsino’s mind. After all, the plot is as “high fantastical” as something a distressed lover might imagine. (1.1.15). 

Malvolio’s mention of fancy is also about love and imagining it. He talks about “her [Olivia’s] fancy,” but the context of the scene and the rest of his dialogue imply that he is the one who fancies Olivia (2.5.24).. Malvolio claims that Olivia has said she would fancy “one of my complexion,” indicating that Malvolio has, through confirmation bias and imagination, convinced himself that Olivia was in love with him even before reading Maria’s letter (2.5.25). The fact that Malvolio, the outwardly stalwart Puritan, is as fanciful and in love as Orsino is a strong device for making fun of the Puritans as Shakespeare was wont to do. 

Sebastian has his reference to fancy when he meets Olivia and finds that he is the object of her fancy. 

[Discussing of the other two quotes]

In Twelfth Night, characters mention fancy when in fantastical scenes. Orsino had neglected his duties as a Duke to be lovesick over Olivia, Malvolio convinced himself that Olivia was in love with him moments before happening upon a letter regarding Olivia’s love, Sebastian came to a foreign city and found that a woman he had never seen was madly in love with him, and the final scene is perhaps the most fanciful of them all. Everything comes together in a hilarious, satisfying, and utterly unrealistic way. The use of the word fancy indicates that a scene either was or will be fanciful. This implies that Shakespeare is breaking the fourth wall, drawing attention to works of the imagination when the audience may be considering the play as imagination. In that way, Shakespeare implies that this comedy, however nice it may seem, is just a lovesick fantasy in the mind of Duke Orsino. 

Note also that almost every mention of the word is in reference to Olivia. The only exception is when Orsino calls Viola his “fancy’s queen,” but Orsino could just be (Inception-style) trying to prove to himself that he can love another. That is why the timeline does not make sense; Orsino needed to believe that his mind was not so changeable, that he would need three months with another woman to move past his love for Olivia. 

Quotes:

1.1.14-15:

Orsino: “So full of shapes is fancy 

That it alone is high fantastical.”

Context: These lines conclude Orsino’s opening monologue about his lovesickness and passion for Olivia. The monologue is discordant throughout, and this line sounds very arrogant, that nobody but a lover could have an extreme imagination.

This quote illustrates Orsino’s arrogance about his position (which is expanded upon in his later argument with Viola) and tells the audience that Orsino has spent some time cooped up in his mansion thinking of Olivia. 

2.5.23-25

Malvolio: “I have heard herself come

thus near, that, should she fancy, it should be one

of my complexion.“

Context: This comes just before Malvolio finds Maria’s letter, when he is fancying that Olivia might be in love with him. He has almost convinced himself of her love even before he sees Maria’s letter, which would be a strange coincidence if Twelfth Night was not a comedy. 

This quote describes Malvolio’s desperation to be loved by Olivia. He uses a few choice words and actions of Olivia as a justification for her love, indicating confirmation bias and lack of perspective. 

4.1.63-66

Sebastian: “What relish is in this? how runs the stream?

Or I am mad, or else this is a dream:

Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep;

If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep!”

Context: This comes just after Sebastian enters Illyria and finds a beautiful woman suddenly wish to marry him. It is so illogical that he believes he must be dreaming, and he wishes for fancy to keep him from waking up. 

This quote tells us that Sebastian is wondrous at his entrance to Illyria. He forgets about Antonio as soon as strange men wish to duel and a strange beautiful woman claims to be in love with him. Sebastian is far more relaxed than most people would be in this context, especially if they could not find Antonio, the only person he was close with for the past three months.

5.1.412-415

Orsino: “Cesario, come;

For so you shall be, while you are a man;

But when in other habits you are seen,

Orsino's mistress and his fancy's queen.”

Context: This is the last line spoken by any character except Feste. It comes after Orsino learns of Viola’s true identity and gives up his love for Olivia. 

This quote implies that Orsino still thinks of Viola as Cesario, at least while she is in men’s clothing. 

[xjoonchildx]

Ok so about a year ago you answered an ask about Arranged by obiwrites on AO3 and I made a mental of note of checking it out and it wasn’t until maybe 2-3ish months ago that I finally took the time to read it and let me just say you were so right it’s so fucking good. I honestly never read on there bc I’m just so used to reading on tumblr but I’m so glad I did bc that story is a masterpiece. I just finished it about and hour ago and I’m not too proud to admit I cried lmao. Btw I hope this isn’t weird bringing up another authors work like this but I figured since you’ve talked about how much you loved the story I could tell you about it bc I wouldn’t know who else to tell 🥲

OMG this makes me so happy? arranged is one of those fics that seriously lives at the very top of the hit list in my mind. obi's talent is just insane. INSANE.

i might have cried, too in the final chapter. maybe from sexual frustration? lmaooo. legit have never needed two fictional characters to bone as bad as i needed those two to AHEM come together. and boy was it satisfying when they finally did 🥴🥴🥴

and to your last point: i am always ready to talk about another writer's work, success, and bad-ass stories. we don't gatekeep here or begrudge other people's talents. let's talk about it, baby 💕

[firelord-frowny]

@itsmerandi

imma explaaaain what my experience of getting tested and diagnosed for ADHD was like ok woooooooooo here we go!

So, I got my testing done at UMBC's ~psychology training clinic.~ This was a few years ago, so their policies and whatnot may have changed, but when I went, I believe they mentioned that you don't actually have to be affiliated with umbc at all in order to use their services, which included adhd and learning disability testing, therapy and counseling, annnd probably a bunch of other stuff that wasn't relevant to me.

As for the pricing, since they're a training clinic, they didn't accept insurance, but they did charge based on a ~sliding scale~ with your income. My parents paid for my testing, and with their combined income, which I guess fell into the category of Middle Middle Class or whatever, it came out to about 700 bucks (WHICH WAS EXTRA IRRITATING BECAUSE IF THEY'D GOTTEN ME TESTED IN ELEMENTARY OR MIDDLE OR HIGH SCHOOL LIKE I ASKED, THE TESTING WOULD HAVE BEEN FREEEEEEEEEEE but anyway).

I should also note that I didn't actually go there for adhd testing?? I went for dyscalculia testing lmao but apparently the learning disability testing and the adhd testing had enough overlap that they were able to confidently diagnose both issues???

The first part of the process was basically an ~intake meeting~ or something, I guess, where I filled out some questionnaires, and then I was introduced to the trainee who'd be testing me, the more advanced trainee who'd be assisting her, and the supervisor who'd be breathing down both their necks the whole time to make sure they didn't fuck up lmaooo. My parents were also at the meeting, and we all answered a bunch more questions about my academic history, my behavioral patterns, etc. I don't remember exactly how long this meeting was, but I'd guess at least an hour.

The next part of the process was the actual testing, which took place over uhhhhh 2 or 3 separate visits that were each 3ish hours long. It was kinda grueling, ngl, but not because it was ~difficult~ or anything. Just very tedious and time consuming.

They tested across a wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide range of subjects and abilities, so like, just because it was primarily for dyscalculia didn't mean they didn't also test reading and language skills, verbal and written expression, comprehension, spelling, attention to detail, ability to follow instructions, general knowledge shit about history and science and whatnot. I remember one of the questions was "how long does it take for light from the sun to reach the earth" lmaoooo and I said 7 and a half minutes but i was wrooooooong it was 8 and a half. 😢

I think there was also part of the test where I had to like... configure a bunch of geometric blocks to match various shapes they showed me??

I can't really remember the entire scope of questions/activities that it all entailed since it was SOOOOOOOOO expansive, but suffice it to say that it was EXTREMELY thorough. they did not leave one single stone unturned omggg.

So after that, the last part of the process was the meeting where they explained the results. the document was hellaaaaaa long, like 15 pages or something, and had detailed breakdowns of my scores in all the different areas, along with lil graphs/tables/whatever that showed how those scores compared to the general population, and where those scores ranked on a scale of ~severely impaired~ to ~superior.~ what was so fuckinnnn wild was that for literally almost EVERYTHING that wasn't a mathy subject, I scored in the ~superior~ range, while EEEVERYTHING that was mathy had ~severely impaired~ scores lmaoooOOOO randi im literalllly a bona fide genius and a bona fide idiot all at once.

But yeah so, they explained what it all meant and how they did the scoring and blah blah blah, and basically confirmed that my dyscalculia is SHOCKINGLY BAD lmfao like, the supervisor lady was STUNNED by how bad. and then she whipped out the ADHD as like a Surprise Bonus Diagnosis lmaoooo. I remember she'd mentioned it in the intake meeting, that some of what I was describing to her sounded like ADHD, but I was noooooooooooot expecting to actually get a diagnosis on it one way or the other, and at first I didn't even really take it seriously, but then as she started explaining what ADHD actually even is, I was like

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. and it was like whiplash how hard it hit me because I had NO IDEAAAAAAA that many of the life skills that I struggle with were associated with an Actual Thing.

But anyway! At the last meeting, they alsooooooooooo explained a bunch of possible treatment options, or just, things I could do that might help me be more successful in school/life in spite of the deficits I had, and one of the things they recommended was a ~smart pen~ that would record audio while you take notes in class, and then afterwards if you wanna listen back to what was being said in class while you were writing a particular thing down, you can touch the pen to the spot where you wrote it on, and it'll play back the audio from that moment! 🤯 which, i never actually got a smart pen, and i know thats prolly not relevant to anything that might be useful for you lmao but im just mentioning it bc i thought it was such a fucking cool concept like woooooooooow.

Annnnd then after I had all the paperwork confirming my diagnoses, I was able to get my math requirements waived so i could graduate without a math credit lololol and that was that. cost 700 fucking extra dollars to finish college, booooooo.

but honestlyyyyyy it was SO worth it, and at the very least i would hellaaaaa high key recommend, if ya feel like it, that you at least see if you can find out how much it would cost you with the sliding scale, and/or considering it for a second opinion if you do get tested somewhere and don't feel confident in the process or the results.

obviouslyyyy i can't really compare it to the experience i might have had if i'd gone through a regular psychological services provider through insurance or whatever, but i have a strong feeling that it wouldn't have been neeeeeeeeeearly as thorough, and i wouldn't have felt nearly as attended to. 10/10 for umbc psychology training clinic. would definitely recommend.

[ruins-mourner]

Arm hurty - Covid shot

Eyes sleepy - woke up at 2:00 am

Brain delirious - I think I might be high on my adderall

[pop-punklouis]

DALLAS SHOW RECAP:

Okay so, here’s my recap of the show (and just the entire day in general lmao)!

Everyone knows about the horrid wristband situation in the morning so no need to linger on that— besides being able to meet new friends in line (looking at you @rosecoloredlight ) as we bonded in our suffering together for that hour of hell ✨ then we went back to the hotel room, chilled out a little bit, got some breakfast, and then began getting ready. we left about 3ish so we could get to the venue to take photos with the sign before it got dark out. then! we went out to pregame at a mexican restaurant in downtown dallas.

This is when we meet up with @himboniall and @getalittleclosey as they came to pregame with us. the tacos were bomb. the four margaritas we had were also bomb lmao. then we took some shots right before hitting the road at 6PM to go to the venue. when i tell you we were buzzing…… we were like a goddamn beehive. so deliriously happy so bubbly so warm lol. we also took a margarita for the road and drank that in the long, LONG line before getting in. we didn’t even try for merch since were all going to more than one show, so we headed straight for the floor! this is where we were hit in the face with those blue and green vendor/bar lights and we all looked at each other like “ok bluegreener relax 💀”

then! when we got to the floor, we were all just vibing with each other in the back. sunroom was decent! they were very so-cal beachy punk blondies. but i was into it. we got yet. another drink (rip) and sipped that during sunroom’s set before Louis came on. and of course Mr. Brightside was on his pre-show playlist and we were screaming all the lyrics. this is when the lights went out and everyone lost their everloving minds.

Okay so now to the concert highlights:

Louis opened with We Made It, and it was so loud. the crowd was almost overpowering his own vocals. the energy was elevated from the very beginning. i think this really loosened louis up because he just came ALIVE. i was so happy for him. you could feel the energy bouncing off of him and the crowd. it was radiating back and forth between us. his smile did not leave his face. not sure why some of the livestreams made it seem like the crowd was dead because it most certainly wasn’t haha

Next highlight was Habit because the crowd hung on to every word, every note, every…. thing. it was such a good crowd reaction for Habit, and of course we all revved up for the Princess Park line. like it was much louder than i thought it would be, but we were DEAFENING during that part. it will always be one of my favorite parts of his set to have the crowd grow exponentially louder during that line. it’s so special and he was grinning so hard.

As much as I wish he would replace Little Black Dress with another 1D song, you cannot underestimate the power that is unleashed in a room full of 1D stans when one of them play a 1D song. we were jumping up and down, shouting to the ceiling, dancing in the back. holding onto each other. it was such a good time.

Defenceless, my beloved….. i’m so sorry you were done dirty. the crowd was just NOT getting into it at all???? it was quite bizarre because defenceless, in my opinion, is one of the best pop songs of the last decade and it deserves the respect for being that. and yet, the crowd really felt dead. but this is when @rosecoloredlight found us again and we single-handedly carried that song and the energy on our BACKS. we were twirling around, dancing, screaming the lyrics at the top of our lungs, and absolutely grooving. *cue my friend’s video of defenceless where you can hear me say “why the fuck is no one hype” in the background lmaoo.

His comment during Walls “I know you guys love this bit” about “for every question why, you were my because” like 🔪🔪…unnecessary but i appreciate it sir 😌 also his note-change during 7? spiritual experience.

And of course Only The Brave was very emotional. I don’t think you could really see the scope of the venue in any livestream, but that entire venue was full of pride flags— absolutely busting at the seams. there were several fans outside giving out tons of small pride flags and so many of us held them up and waved them during the song. it was such a special moment. it was the most accepted and safe i’ve felt at a show in a long time. just knowing that louis could look out into the crowd and see an actual sea of rainbows (not being dramatic) makes my heart so full. it was a moment i’m so glad i was a part of, because the love in that room in those 2 minutes was absolutely beautiful and inspiring.

Alright, so here comes the encore. the entire crowd just began chanting the lyrics to No Control which surprised me but i really loved it haha. also KILL MY MIND ENDING THE SHOW (louis has taste he knows it’s his best song). The moment @getalittleclosey @rosecoloredlight my friend and i heard the opening notes, we went straight into mosh mode. we began giggling uncontrollably and getting hype for the chorus. then as it built up we backed up from one another and charged! i fell on my ass bc the floor was slippery with my boots but they pulled me up and we kept moshing and dancing. then during the bridge we started a circle pit which was such a blast bc everyone else thought we were insane and giving us looks but our 5 person pit was having the time of our lives. positive this was the moment i lost my voice. my teeth were chattering with how much fun we had. i recommend everyone opening up the pit to KMM at least once. that song begs for it, and we delivered ✨

NOW, we were still delightfully buzzed, so on our way out we saw the tour buses and our liquid confidence told us just to stand and wait because we had nothing else to do lmaooo. so we did, and then others began following our lead and we had a tiny little group with us waiting. we began joking around with security and cheering at the trash guys every time they brought another bag out (think the hysteric applause in that one spongebob episode when he’s mopping the floor for the talent show). they got such a kick out of us. after about an hour they moved us to the gate, and my friend was like “okay so it’s always Bus 2” DJFKFKFL and while a lot of people crowded near the first bus we were over by the second bus (which ended up being correct 💅🏼). we met some people in line and talked about fanfic and other fandom things before he came out.

and i’ll be honest, we didn’t even think he was gonna come out. we had convinced ourselves it was such a low chance because he had a hotel that we didn’t even expect him to show up out there an hour and a half later. YET he did, and when he did my friends and i just stared for a second because it was surreal to us that he was standing like. right there. and he was so sweet and kind and soft-spoken. he was absolutely stunning in his CUSTOM MADE HOODIE. it looked like he had just taken a shower because he looked refreshed. he thanked everyone for coming out and apologized for not being able to properly meet due to covid (which we knew x). he blew us all kisses and made everyone feel special. like i said previously, we only had maybe 30 people out there (maybe) and it was just such a cute intimate moment. after he left we just turned and looked at each other like “we just met louis. we really just met louis. did that happen?” lmaooo. four of us have been fans since like the beginning and for us to finally meet him after all this time it felt so much more special in a way to do in on the first date of his first solo tour!! it just 🤧 we could not shut up about it. we were and still are on the biggest high.

then we were on the brink of exhaustion and we’re super dehydrated so we went to the only place open (an irish pub) and had three glasses of water, an awful pretzel, and some subpar mac and cheese. it did it’s job though. we got back to our hotel around 2 AM and saw all the bruises on our body from the show and kept raving about meeting louis before we fell asleep. so so happy. it was a great day. one of the best gig life shows i’ve been to in a long time. i’ll be keeping yesterday close to my heart from now on. so excited to see him again next Monday 🤍

[bluebox-42]

I'm going to embarrass myself for science

I did shots for my 21st birthday. And decided to take notes because that's what I do. Here are the completely unaltered notes. May they be useful for writing or at least enjoyable to read.

Personal experience:

Coordination definitely shot but my instinct is that it isn’t, def. bad

There is a layer between and the world, might be nice if I didn’t crave a sense of control

-I meant between me and the world, is that my coordingation not working or something else?

Less instinct to censor, but still an ability

-might be cause I don’t want to get super drunk and am therefore not experiencing maximum drunkenness, but if my character has high tolerance might be fine

-also people might just take alcohol as an excuse

Thank god for autocorrect, again the lack of coordingation is real even I my instinct is that it is not

-later addition: might be interesting storywise? Maybe not

-is that a autism thing (thing took three tries to spell) or a practicing metacognition thing being able to tell I mean

-not having double vision, is that a real thing? Do autistic people not have it?

-I am having trouble tracking, prob. Because my lazy eye. Still no double vision

-this is maybe 7 shots in 3ish hours. I drank when there was a murder scene in Deadpool 2 nd that’s also how I timed it. The 7this the limit in terms of making coordination much worse. And the things below

-limbs are heavy, so is my head

-probably my reacctions are slower, hard to tell they are always shit

9- now everything is vague, I am forgetting things once they happen, still not double vision, just inability to describe things. I said forget, but it’s more like they fade into vagueness

-quiets the part of my brain that is analysing and double analysing everything social or otherwise

-now my vision is swimming

-alright that’s it I can’t do this anymore

-might take notes on a hangover, that’s probably not gonna be fun but I am curious so I want to experience it once.

-things that should be obvious aren’t? Like I it took a full minute to remember the container I took in case I vomited

-brain fog I can not stress this enough

-important to mention I am barely 5 1 and 138ish pounds

-the ringing in my ears got loud once it got quiet is that normal???

- I keep throwing my phone sorta, like I dropped it in the trash and keep losing it when I swing my arm

-one burden of inhibition gone, but I am still careful not to be a

-thought I typed out a swear wtf?

-I am on mobile right now, can’t disable autocorrect And I just now realised I shojld

-assume it took two tries at least to write any two syllable + word and sometimes one syllable ods

X-I am pbserving myself like a creature jn an exhibit lmao

-Everything feels lime a dream which might be liberating if I wasn't reminding myself it isn't constantly

- copied from discord, feels super.important

Oh the only none shot I drank was a cup of green tea. Might be important if I feel up to hangover notez

Is my executive dysfunction worse? Took 30 lminutes to turn off lights

-distance from my emotions is nice

Keep letting gravity throw.my head down is that a stjm?

-still spuraling (is this real or fake am I acting) might be cause J lack distractions

Is this existential dread? I don’t like

Closing my lazy eye helps me read probably normal

Mobile word is awful

Part of me wants to say “it’s so dark” but duh I turned off the lights. Is this small talk?

I’ve been fighting the urge to type the letter AAAAAAAA until I sleep. That’s normal but it’s harder

I guess being drunk doesn’t make you less you just less afraid

I’s that bad? Philosophy

Should turn my scree Timeout down. Feel a important

Where’d I put the throw up thing (1 am)

Found it

PReading is ha4d takes so much energy to do. L

Staying up late I guess

Pr9bably good, don’t wanna vomit and choke. Is that real? l

I need to sleep

Holding phone above my head it keeps sswinging

Why do I do tthis

Things swimming a lot is this double vision?

Movie and tjerfore drinking stopped at ????? N0 later than 11:30

Worth noting I am just looking at my phone which is 3 inches from my face

I use suggestions when.the words are too f*cked up to be recognized

Takes 3 troes to do anything I hate it

I take frequent breake so my head stops(1:20)

*spinning how did I not get that

I wanna take good no5es but the whole “deliberate poisoning” f*cos it up

· Spelling is hard ph9ne keys are so smsll

· Again coordination I think it’s fine but then this happened

· The distance frpm myselg6 idb52 3real

o Lmao I can tell this is useless (1:26 am)

o M

o Can’t Agop lahfinf 1:2

o So great

Cant stop laughing (1:37l

My little bro checked on me he’s so sweet

Also my cackling kept him up oops

Why is alcohol a depressant officially

Is it more or less authentic tp spellvjevk myself??

-I wanna do it cause damm

Still can’t stop giggling (1:51 am) I hate it but it’s hilarious

Also something rises in my throat (154 am

Do they give Nobel prizes for whatever thiz is?

So actually this feels like hysterical laughter or maybe laughter at the futility of existence

Maybe that’s why it’s a depressant (206 am)

The less coherent I get the more I feel the need to timestamp

Might just be me

All of this is just me

I can’t stream of consviousnesd other peppleS tthoughts

This doesn’t feel real still. But for real goodnight 217 am

Really I can’t believe the things happening are really ggappsning

230 time is less sped up tjam before but also just realised I didn’t have much trouble walking to.my bedroom. Which I’ll get measurements for in the morning

BTW I make references to a character, that's for a fanfic I am probably not gonna write but that's tied up with my other notes so I can't remove it

[dreamiehrs]

dream run ➛ nct dream

genre: fluff, crack (it’s the dreamies what do you expect), roadtrip!au, bestfriends!dreamies

summary: you and your besties (nct dream) go on a road trip to this beautiful beach before summer ends.

note: a bulleted fic bc idk how to write this tbh... also this is completely platonic love!! just you and the dreamies being besties <3 enjoy! (gif credit: @softkooky​)

warning: some swearing

so you and your best friends, the dreamies, are all hanging out in their dorms, moseying around and playing video games on jeno’s computer from time to time

until hyuck runs in

“guys!! I’ve got an idea!”

everyone internally groans (sorry hyuck)

“we should all go on a road trip together! wouldn’t that be fun? injunnie can drive!”

cue renjun tossing a pillow at hyuck’s face

“well, I’m interested. where are we gonna drive to?” jaemin speaks up from behind the kitchen counter, snacking on some sugar cubes

“I haven’t thought that far yet.”

now everybody is throwing a pillow at hyuck as he tries to defend himself while you pull out your phone beside chenle

“what ya doing?” he asks beside you and leans over your shoulder

“trying to figure out where we should go.”

“see! y/n agrees with me~!” hyuck calls out and runs behind you to look at your phone screen as well

the first thing that pops up is this beautiful condo right near the beach. a lighthouse sitting on top of a mountain right beside the condo, and you swear you can see a restaurant only a mile or two away from it

you jump up quickly from the couch “guys, let’s go here.”

everyone reads what's on your phone one by one and all of them agree

“should we go now?” chenle asks, almost leaping from his seat

“I think we should wait until tomorrow. it’s already the afternoon and if we start now, we won’t get there until midnight or later.” renjun remarks and jisung nods his head

hyuck has a frown on his face and chenle does as well, jeno looks indifferent but you know he really wants to go

"I say f-it and let's just go." you declare and everyone but renjun jump up in glee, while he just facepalms

now everyone is running to their rooms, rustling through their drawers and bringing out the suitcases

you excuse yourself to go back to your apartment and grab your things

no one notices because they’re too busy running around frantically

thirty to forty minutes later, you arrive back to their dorms to see everyone standing outside of it with all of their suitcases

renjun passes by you and states “I hate this fucking family” (wow what a vine reference king)

you laugh loudly as you all shove your suitcases in the trunk of the car

now it's time to decide who sits where inside the car

you all play rock-paper-scissors except renjun because... he's driving (unfortunately)

jaemin wins passenger seat in the front and literally glomps renjun

you, jisung, and chenle are sitting in the middle row all together, and they both decide that you're gonna sit in between them

RIP you... but not really because the maknaes are tons of fun and you'll probably be cracking up during the way there and back ^^

jeno and hyuck lose and are in the back, but they don't seem to mind

because they downloaded tons of shows and movies to watch so... they're completely prepared for this trip

you all shuffle into the car and bring some things to keep you guys entertained... renjun even bought those tiny screens with a DVD player so you guys can watch movies LMAO

renjun pulls up the address on the GPS and you guys start your adventure there!

the first hour or so is full of bantering and teasing the others, then you go to your own devices

lele brought board games, books, card games, tons of electronics, etc

while jisung just brought... food

we all know how much this boy loves to eat

you just chuckle at how his bookbag is overflowing with snacks while he just lightly pushes your forehead back before handing you some chips

you accept them and lele pulls out a card game for the three of you to play

nana is in the front listening to an audiobook with his airpods... it's titled "how much sugar is too much sugar?"

jeno and hyuck are watching a movie in the back and sharing a blanket together... you can see jeno slowly drifting off and hyuck tapping his shoulder every few minutes to wake him up

injunnie is just... well... driving as nana would update him about his audiobook from time from time

the card game between you, lele, and jisungie is getting intense and finally, the winner is revealed... it's you!

lele and jisungie already planned that if you won, you would be surprised with a tickle attack

they send each other 'the signal' and start jabbing your sides rapidly, you squirming around like crazy to avoid their hands

the three of you decide to watch a movie together, putting the small movie players injunnie bought to use

you all attempt to watch on one movie player, jisung having to scoot even closer to you

you're now squishing lele but he just lifts his left arm and places it on the top of the seat behind your head, giving you more room

now hyuck starts complaining about how he's hungry and jisungie just throws a snack at hyuck before going back to the movie

"I need to go to the bathroom~~" hyuck whines out, jeno sleeping soundly on hyuck's right shoulder

“hyuck, we’ve only been driving for an hour and a half by now.” renjun calls out and disturbs jeno’s beauty sleep, him groaning and clinging even more to hyuck

“and? you guys know I have a small bladder, right?”

hyuck’s complaints finally get to injun’s head “alright, when I find the closest rest stop I’ll let you all know.”

hyuck hums in content and lets himself slowly drift off to sleep, him and jeno now cuddling like no tomorrow

after about 30 minutes, renjun stops at a little rest stop and the stillness of the car makes everyone aware of where they are

hyuck literally jumps out of the car and sprints toward the bathrooms... naruto who?

you all waddle over to the bathrooms and do your business

afterward, you guys head over to the little snack shop nearby to try to buy lunch

jeno let you borrow one of his airpods so you’re... extra careful because you tend to be pretty clumsy

he has a bomb playlist ngl... you did your best to not bust out dancing in the middle of an aisle earlier

so you’re all in the line waiting to check out when one of you realizes...

you lost jaemin

“where’s nana?” hyuck asks and everyone goes into panic mode

so you guys abandon the check out line and go searching for jaemin who just disappeared

you were passing by the frozen section of the shop when you swear you saw someone who looked like jaemin trapped in one of the freezers

...wait a minute

you take a double take and behold... it is jaemin whose stuck in one of the freezers

you quickly open the door and tell him to get out, while he just replies with: “no, I’m done with this road trip by now.”

“jaemin you’re actually going to freeze, get out of the freezer.”

“make me.”

you curse at him underneath your breath and call jeno for help, who just looks wearily at nana “jaemin, what the actual fuck are you doing?”

“trying to hide from you guys so you won’t make me go back in that cursed car.”

you and jeno share a glance before dragging nana out of the freezer

you give nana your jacket so he doesn’t actually freeze to death and tug him along by his hand as you spot the others

“why is jaemin blue?” jisung inquires as hyuck back hugs nana, attempting to warm the poor boy up

“I tried to escape you guys by freezing myself in the freezer. it didn’t work out as planned.”

...okay jaemin

so you guys buy all your lunches and head back to the car

renjun revs it back to life and all of you get situated before driving off

time skip to 3ish hours later bc... I’m lazy :)

you arrive at the condo and it’s !! breathtaking

you're not too far from the beach and there is a restaurant and a convenience shop nearby

once you get in the condo you guys play rock-paper-scissors (once again) to figure out the situation of the rooms

jaemin wins the biggest room of all but, to be honest... he deserved it

except he has to room with jisungie... you can just imagine it now: jaemin cuddling and babying jisung until no tomorrow

hyuck & jeno get their own rooms!! hooray!

you and china line have to share a room... time for them to be speaking in Chinese and you looking far off in the distance like you’re in The Office

it’s around 4 pm and you all decide to go to the beach because!! why not

you all change into your bathing suits as fast as you can and slather sunscreen on each other and go running to the beach

at first, you guys were just gonna all sit down on the chairs you brought and take it easy because... it took a while for you guys to get there

however, everyone was forcing each other in the water so... you just went with it

the water was super cold at first until hyuck picked you up by the waist and dragged you deeper into the ocean (like he did to mark in that Miami vid)

jisungie just laughs at how relentless hyuck is and stays a safe distance from you and him

hyuck eventually gives up and lets you go before chasing down jaemin and doing the same to him

you go and bother renjun whose trying to build a sandcastle by poking his sides until he gets annoyed

“y/n... do you want to die?”

you just laugh and keep on annoying him until he gets fed up and almost puts you in a headlock

lele is chasing jisung across the beach and jeno is surfing on the waves with the surfboard he brought himself

about an hour later... you’re all exhausted so you bundle yourselves in the towels you brought and trek back to your condo

when you get back, you all take quick showers and change into your pajamas

lele decides to stay up with jisungie and hyuck to play video games while you and the others go to sleep

you wake up the next morning to a body draped over you and to be honest, you’re not surprised when you find out its lele

he’s clinging onto you like a koala and you just laugh at his sleepy face nuzzled into your stomach

you don’t wanna disturb him but at the same time... you really have to go to the bathroom, so...

coincidentally, at the same time, someone starts clashing pans together, which you presume is renjun

lele jumps out of his skin and you just pat the top of his head before slithering out of his snug hold

you go do your business and end up taking another shower bc... why not

you slip into some comfy shorts and a loose, long-sleeve shirt before making your way to the kitchen

you plop down on a barstool beside a groggy jeno and lie against the cold, marble counter

hyuck follows your actions on the right side of you and his bedhead is... extreme... let’s just say that for now

you guys didn’t stop by the grocery store on your way here so basically... you had no food except the snacks jisungie brought + the ones you guys bought at the convenience store

renjun looks up the closest breakfast restaurant and it’s only 15 minutes away... that’s definitely a win

you all shuffle into the car and this time you sit all the way in the back with jeno just so you could sleep on your way there LMAO

you get woken up by both lele and hyuck screaming in your ears... cue renjun saying “I hate this fucking family”

just kidding, you love these dorks so much

after you guys order and everything you kinda just... chill out

you and nana play around with the snapchat filters on his phone

renjun is talking your ear off with all the conspiracy videos he watched earlier

hyuck is... sleeping

jeno is tuning the whole world out w his airpods

and jisung and chenle are quietly screaming about the pubg game they’re playing on their phones right now

when your food arrives you all gobble down without wasting a second

...that was a bad choice on your guys part because everyone is dozing off now LMAO

you guys shuffle back into the car and drive back to the condo to get ready to go to the beach (again, I know)

you guys arrive and you brought a lounge chair to sleep on because... you’re that tired from stuffing your face this morning

you unfold your chair and plant injun’s purple umbrella beside your chair

you’re just drifting off when you hear someone’s footsteps approach your chair

you expected someone to tackle you but however, that’s not the case

you open one eye to see nana unfolding a lounge chair and planting it beside yours

“take a picture, it’ll last longer.” you can hear him say and you just groan

“shush, nana. I’m trying to sleep.”

“well, I’m trying to get my beauty sleep too, so don’t disturb me.”

you start dozing off in the middle of his sentence LMAO

you don’t know how long you’re asleep for until you feel someone giving you a piggyback ride

you open your eyes for a second and see a tuft of light pink hair before dozing off again

you don’t even remember being slid off of jisung’s back into the back of the car with jeno beside you

all you remember is waking up the next morning with no one lying by your side, which probably meant you slept in

you go freshen up in the bathroom and change into some actual decent clothes before heading out of your shared bedroom

however, you’re only met with hyuck and jisung sat on the couch watching a channel on the tv

“where’s everyone?” you ask as you walk over to them and squeeze yourself between both of them

“oh, they’re getting refreshments because hyuck and I are really worn out from the past two days. so today’s gonna be a chill day.” jisung explains

“but wasn’t yesterday a chill day?” you inquire as you look back and forth between jisung and hyuck

“it was a chill day for you and nana. everyone else was playing hard while you two got your hard-earned beauty sleep.” hyuck answers back and you nod before all the three of you are in an intense episode of Game of Thrones

all your legs are tangled together as you three wanted to cuddle bc you guys kept on complaining about how cold it was... however, jisung untangled his legs to go grab a humongous fluffy blanket and threw it on top of you and hyuck

jisung proceeds to snuggle underneath the covers once again with you on his left, and you struggle to keep your eyes open until you guys hear the front door open

“we’re back! wake up, sleepyheads!” renjun shouts which makes all three of you simultaneously flinch

him, nana, lele, and jeno all set down the grocery bags on the coffee table in front of you guys

“geez, how much did you guys buy?” hyuck asks from your right as jisung snuggles closer to you on your left

“tons, if you couldn’t tell. everything’s up for grabs, so get it while it’s fresh.” you rustle from underneath the snug blanket and search through the bags, eventually settling on green tea ice cream, chocolate, bottled water, and sour cream and onion chips

you sit back down on the couch and you hear hyuck snicker from beside you. “so unhealthy..” he says

“don’t say that like you don’t have a whole bag of Cheetos in your lap right now.”

he just nudges you in response and somehow all seven of you guys sit on the couch together

jeno has control of the remote and he puts on Spirited Away

it was eight when you guys started and it was a two-hour movie so... you guys finished around ten

after the movie, you guys had cleaned up all the trash from the snacks you ate and got ready for bed... jisungie invited you to stay up with him to play video games and you took up that offer for about an hour or so

when your head hit the pillow later that night, you were out cold LMAO

the next morning renjun wakes you up by shaking you, and you just hit his chest to make him stop

“y/n... it’s our last day here.” this made you get up

you just pout and he ruffles your hair before pushing you towards the bathroom... basically telling you to hurry the f up

once you’re all situated, you head out to the kitchen to see him serving everyone pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon

what a god

this particular morning, all of you take your time eating. savoring everything before you guys have to leave tomorrow morning

lele lets you share one of his airpods and his playlist is actually filled with every nct song known to exist... taeyong is *crying in proud mom noises*

jaemin plays with your hair from beside you while he scrolls through Instagram, already done with his breakfast

and yes... you guys go to the beach once again... how could you not? and especially on the last day

you guys are already all prepared for the beach so you jump in the car and drive to the beach for the third time

jeno brings his boards to teach you guys how to surf!! how fun!!

as a team effort, you guys try your best for 15 minutes straight

you actually got the ropes of it, but the other five kept on getting aggravated because they kept on losing balance every 5 seconds

you thank jeno for giving you some lessons on how to surf and he grins at you before you start to head to where lele is seated on the sand

he’s making a sandcastle, and now it’s a competition on who can make the biggest one

after a few minutes, he glances at yours and starts hyena laughing until he just starts to silently laugh

“oh gosh, what is it now?”

he wipes a tear from his eye. “yours reminds me of jisung’s big head.”

before you can even react to his statement, jisung comes up from behind chenle and necks him before sprinting off in the other direction

lele is quick to get up and start chasing after jisung. you don’t notice that hyuck has come up from behind you and lifts you from underneath your arms

“hyuck, don’t you d―“

“too late.” he carries you bridal style to the ocean and the both of you go under for a solid 10 seconds before you come back up again. your wet hair is now sticking to your back and hyuck is grinning at you like an idiot

he comes closer to you and you know he’s gonna dump you back into the water... but there’s nowhere to go to escape from his antics at this rate

“if I drown I’m blaming it on you.” you say as he lifts you up once again

he smirks. “fair enough.” before dunking you back into the water and doing the same to himself as well

you come back up for air and your ears are... full of water

thanks, hyuck

lele is still chasing jisung on the beach while renjun stares at them like their madmen

it’s all fun and games until jisung trips and lele literally pounces on him LMAO

and at this rate... you’re extremely burnt and everyone is wiped out from being at the beach for... 2 to 3 hours...

you get jeno to piggyback you to the car because... you’re too tired to even try to move

he does like the sweet guy he is and even sits in the back with you so you could lie your head on his shoulder for a bit... can you tell that I love jeno?

it's around 4 pm and you guys decide to freshen up for a bit before heading out to dinner

you try to look decent and ask the guys for their opinions on what outfit you should wear

they all have different fashion styles, though, so you just reside in hyuck who has the closest style to yours out of the others

when you put on each individual outfit and walk out of the bathroom like you’re striding down the runway, hyuck is your hypeman

even if he isn’t digging the outfit that much, he’ll still compliment how great it looks on you or how it describes your personality

once you settle on an outfit that both you (and hyuck) agree on, you guys head out to the Mediterranean restaurant nearby!!

you’re situated between lele and hyuck... the loudest ones of your friend group... god help you

the three of you scan the menu, helping each other figure out what they’re gonna eat and such

whatever you guys order looks really good... you’ve never been more excited to eat than at this moment lmao

you then proceed to entertain the two boys beside you, playing truth or dare and never have I ever until you guy’s food arrives

you inhale your food like earlier, and you have to force yourself awake because this time, no one was going to give you a piggyback ride TT

when you guys get back to the condo, you all change into pjs and renjun decides to go to bed first, having to drive for a great deal tomorrow

you wipe off some of the makeup you had on for dinner and jump into bed alongside renjun, opting to watch a short youtube video of cooking asmr to help you fall asleep

before you even know it, you’ve fallen asleep in the middle of the video

yes, you were that tired

you wake up, tangled in your earbuds and renjun still fast asleep beside you

earlier renjun said he wanted to leave around nine... it was already eight

“injunnie, wake up.” you lightly shake him and he groans

“no.”

“oh my gosh, stop being a baby. it’s already eight o’clock.”

his eyes suddenly open and he jumps up to get ready

you just shake your head and decide to make the rounds to see if anybody else was awake

...no one else was awake LMAO

you wrestle with the others to get them up and ready to leave, and at this rate, it seems like you guys are gonna leave at ten

you put on some sweats and an oversized t-shirt before packing all of your stuff... you’re definitely not going to tell renjun that you stole his cream cleanser and almost used all of it... (sorry renjun TT)

you also went to bed at 1 am... yolo

it’s now 8:30 am, and you guys are dumping all your luggage into the trunk of the car

renjun is still planning on driving, so he situates himself inside the car and waits for you guys to finish up with the seating arrangements

jeno is sitting up front with injun

hyuck, jisung, and chenle are sitting in the middle row

and you’re in the back with nana

he lets you listen to the podcast he’s currently listening to while the three in front of you guys are screaming

jeno is deadass playing The Sims on his phone (big mood)

after an hour everybody’s calmed down

you fell asleep on nana’s shoulder and his head is resting on yours

you guys get home safely and you drive yourself back to your apartment

time skip to a few months later... all of you are hanging out at the dreamies’ dorm and hyuck comes running in again

“let’s go on another road trip!!”

here we go again...

[izyibel]

Melbourne daze

Spent a week in Melbourne living with J (S’s friend from secondary school).

Touched down Sunday morning and J picked us up in his grey 2006 jetta and brought us to some Sunday market somewhere. It was my first time meeting J and on the drive there I learnt:

1. He’s vegetarian

2. His car is dying and he’s worried about going on long drives (we still drove up and down mt Buller in it but I’m mentioning this because it’s important foreshadowing!!)

Anyways after the market we went to have lunch at a cafe and then went to his place where S took a nap while J and I bonded over our shared guilty pleasure. Lmao. Very amusing chats.

Then we went grocery shopping and got back to cook dinner and packed for the 3 day trip to Merrijig/ mt Buller.

Past midnight / early Monday morning J went to pick up his friend L from the airport and the four of us crammed all our stuff into his car and he drove us to Mansfield first to rent some snowboards and then up mt Buller where he taught us snowboarding. It was honestly very fun but wow so tiring!!! I am so unfit!

Then close to sunset we headed down the mountain and checked into our cozy Airbnb in Merrijig and we had pizza and wedges from the pub for dinner and played some board games.

Tuesday we didn’t snowboard coz of terrible weather so instead we went to try two different pie places for lunch and then spent the day playing different board games that J brought along. Fun times! I am so competitive!!!

Wednesday we checked out of the Airbnb in the morning and went up the mountain to snowboard again and the weather was awesome and I feel like I made so much progress in terms of my snowboarding skillz lmao.

Then we headed back down at the end of the day to return our gear. J drove the first half and I drove the next half back to his place. Oh and on the way back we stopped on the roadside just to look at the stars. The Milky Way was so clear and it was magical!!!! And there was this kind old man who stopped next to use to see if we were alright because he thought our car broke down.

Thursday J had some uni orientation thing but he was like “yea you can take the car” which is so nice of him. So S and I headed to the shops for brunch and to buy much needed toothpaste because we ran out. Then we headed back and watched some original season of terrace house with J’s friend L and then for dinner S and I took the car again and picked my brother and his girlfriend up to have dinner and then we headed back to their place. Wow they have a rabbit called Harvey who hops around and chews on everything. Played scrabble with my brother and his girlfriend. S won but there was too much tension in the room to really celebrate it ):

Anyways then on Friday J drove us to some famous croissant place for brunch I guess. It was quite nice. Then J and L’s friend M came over to J’s place coz we were all going roller blading and we went to this place to rent the blades and on their website they say $20 for an hour but they let us rent it for $20 for the whole day!! Like as long as we return it before they close. Anyways we went to skate along Princes pier and it wAs magical. Literally pastel skies and good weather and as the sunset we were just skating around and laughing on nice smooth terrain and oh omg J is a pro roller blader. Like literally Yuna Kim on concrete. Skating backwards was no issue for him and I asked him how long he’s been blading for and he said since he was 7!?!? Like wow. Anyways it was a magical evening. Honestly so beautiful I wanted to cry. Then we returned the blades and then headed home for dinner then we went to watch Spider-Man at the movies close to 11 at night.

Saturday, my brother and his girlfriend picked us up and we had pancakes for brunch. His girlfriend used to work at the pancake parlour so she knew what was up and how to get the best dealz. Had intense discussions over pancakes and then went for a walk in a park and played in the playground. The weather was awesome yet again. Blessed with clear skies and sunshine!! Then we had to head back coz J wanted to bring us to cape Schank and he told S and I that we should leave around 3ish from his place so my brother dropped us off oh and he offered to send us to the airport at 5am on Sunday morning which was so nice of him.

So J drove us to Cape Schank and at the start of the drive he was like “Isabel, can you drive us back later?” And I was like yea sure. This is an important tidbit of information (again, foreshadowing what is to come!!!) anyways cape Schank was gorgeous and we climbed the rocks by the sea side to get sick viewz. Thank goodness for low tide too. Pretty awesome watching the sunset there. I want to weep thinking about it tbh.

Then ok so we decided to head to a Japanese place for dinner since it was near this cheesecake/gelato/general dessert bar that J wanted to bring us to so I was driving and we’re some 15 minutes from Clayton and I stop behind a bunch of cars that were waiting at a red light then the light turned green and I literally could not go. Like the car literally could not move. And it was in the middle of the road but J was like oh it’s happened before and he thought maybe the battery died so anyways we put the hazard lights on and call his friend M to come help us and some kind people helped us push the car to the road side and then M came and we tried jump starting the car but it still wasn’t starting then this other kind person stopped by and was like “I work at a battery shop” and he helped us jump start it again but still the engine wasn’t starting and he called one of his colleagues to come and he came by in his van with a bunch of tools to help us and even went to get some more diesel in case it was a lack of fuel and the fuel gauge was just faulty but nope still not working so the dude was like yknow what just leave the car here and come back tomorrow instead of paying so much for towing. So we did that. I don’t know what more has unfolded in this Jetta saga because we flew off the next morning but anyways we left the car there and M drove us back to J’s place where J used his housemate’s car to take us to the Japanese place for dinner and we wolfed down our food coz we spent a good hour and a half in the cold by the road side trying to save a dead car. Anyways then J brought us to the dessert place and then drove us back and S and I scrambled to pack our stuff because we were tired and wanted to sleep but also had to wake up at 5am to make our flight.

Anyways this morning my brother picked us up and dropped us off at the airport. It’s like a 50 minute drive so grateful he offered to drive us!!!!

And yea S and I are back in Brisbane now.

What a week!

[shytiff]

May 2022

9 - I lasered my face today LOL. The price was 1.7 million rupiah. But it was a package that included some other things. It was quite hot, not going to lie.

10 - my face looks a bit better already. Resisted moms invitation for fasting with the reason of me having to do Dr evas assignment. But it turns out I don't need to do it. So I think, oh I should do some studying. But I also did not do that......

11 - fasting today. Woke up at around 10:00. Shower, waxed. Got some motivation to do stuff. I was supposed to study ACLS but I end up trying out clothes for like an hour. And watching some PewDiePie videos. I can't bring myself to study, ugghhh.

15 - acls day today. I sucked at the anesthesia station. My dumbass auscultated the patient to check the ett positioning without bagging it huhu. Feel disappointed with myself. Thankfully the cardio station went well. Can finally look at my gadget without feeling guilty.

16 - just relaxed today. Had indomie for bfast. Told about my plan of staying at nessa’s to my mom and she was suspicious lol. Ngl my tone was a bit defensive after that but thankfully she didn’t ask more questions. Went to dajen’s house, peeps are bowling at MAG. Late late lunch at ikkudo, it’s nice and flavorful but seirockya has stronger flavors. Off from MAG after isya, stopped by at mixue, took the long way and we passed monas lmao. Otw home Devi and Racheel gave me a gifttt that was also from silvi too. Arrived at home at 10 pm lol. Thankfully friends went in for toilet so mom saw friends faces and I don’t get talked to hehehe. 

17 - woke up. My body is tired from the bowling lmao. Tried to pack my stuff but then suddenly it’s time to pick up my bike at dajen’s and laser at lippo. The doctor was probably gregetan and she told the nurse to extract some comedones lmao. Went back, packed my stuff. Mom can’t drive me to nessa’s place because it’s ganjil genap today, so I took TJ. Mom and emir drove me to kalideres, arrived at nessa’s just after Maghrib and I got ready to sleep before isya.

18 - woke up at 3ish, we left nessa’s place at about 03.40. Too lazy to write abt the Bali trip lmao. The bli was very nice, our stay today was nice

19 - Off to Kintamani today. The stay was rly nice! We got upgraded to balcony room. It’s so fucking cold in akasa. We surprised renata there. The vegan banana cake that tasted mostly like chocolate was bomb. Had a nice hot spring dip and delicious mujair nyat nyat. Regretted my decision to shower at night even though there’s warm water lmao

20 - helped a solo Russian tourist on the room next to us to take pictures lmao, packing again, off to Ubud. Quite a Strenuous activity today. Thankfully the (super2 affordable) accommodation was nice and Spacious. We said goodbye to the besttt driver slash guide bli Dewa. Walked a bit at night to get bread and try tacos.

21 - 

[smol1]

Tagged by @freeindarkness (hi you're wonderful) Rules: Answer the questions then tag blogs you'd like to know better. Nickname(s): sissy, lil homie, and frog 🐸Zodiac: Cancer Height: 4'10 or 147 cm Time: 4:41 PM Favorite bands/artists: Cage the Elephant, Five Finger Death Punch, BTS, Minseo, Daughter, Ailee, cavetown, Nicole Dollanganger and many more I can't think of right now! Song currently stuck in my head: The Grand Dream by Minseo! Recently I've really been into her voice! Last movie I watched: My Neighbor Totoro!! Last thing I googled: "if you return bus tickets in dbh is there another way to cross the border" I just finished detroit again, I felt bad for stealing the tickets but no way in heCK was i dealing with the consequences of not taking them lmao Other blogs: @artsy-birb my art account (you should totally follow ;^) ) I didn't post often because I get nervous but I've been posting a bit more? Average amount of sleep: 3 or 15 hours there is NO in between! What am I wearing: 2XL badgers shirt and shorts (aka pjs!) Dream job: when I was younger I wanted to be a singer (who didn't though?) But right now I'm super passionate about art, if i can work with art it would be my dream Dream trip: Seoul, South Korea! Next year in June I'll be traveling to France and Rome! Favorite food: As a stereotypical person from Wisconsin, I love cheese! Do I play any instruments: I used to play clarinet but soon stopped after realizing i hated playing the clarinet! (: Eye color: Blue Hair color: My pink is fading out and sadly I'm back to blonde! Languages: English, I also took 3ish years of German and I surprisingly retained quite a bit? Most iconic song: shiny teeth and me by the one and only chip skylark 😩🤘Random fact: I am infact shorter than crash bandicoot Describe yourself as aesthetic things: (this is going to be everywhere but here) tennis skirts, platform shoes, fluffy blankets, paints and paint brushes, sunflowers, sunny day, freckles, sunset, baby pink, fishnets, corgis, lilly pads, white cats, blue eyes, pale skin, pink hair, denim jackets, and high waisted shorts! I tag: @ancient-goth-kid @boycott-the-sun and @ask-a-badass-hunter have fun boys 😤

[themusicalvoid]

ive been working non-stop for the past 7 hours (save for the like.. 20 min break that i took 3ish hours ago i guess) and i am mentally and physically exhausted

my wrist+arm are dying which is nOT good bc i have so much work to do on my animation tomorrow. and my left index finger hurts really bad also????? which i dont understand??? but it hurts and it makes typing+text awful lmao

anyway, rambles in the tags bc i have Thoughts and i gotta spit em out

[the-awkwardduck]

I was tagged by @paradoxicalpsychic, sorry I'm terrible at doing these lol but thanks for thinking of me bro ;) NICKNAMES: well, none lol STAR SIGN: leo GENDER: female MBTI TYPE: enfp-t (just took the test) HEIGHT: 5'4' TIME: 903 pm BIRTHDAY: aug 13 FAVORITE BANDS: I don't really have any, why couldn't it have been favorite songs??! FAVORITE SOLO ARTISTS: see above xp SONG STUCK IN MY HEAD: good to be alive by Andy Grammer LAST MOVIE I WATCHED: I actually think it was Trolls lol LAST SHOW I WATCHED: watched seriously, Amnesia, but the TV has been playing as background noise for awhile now OTHER BLOGS: pfft none, I just created this one! WHEN I CREATED MY BLOG: right, like 3ish months ago but I'm terrible at telling how much time has passed so don't quote me on that WHAT I POST ABOUT: ummm I think I've only posted things myself a handful of times but I reblog primarily hq!! with other rando fandoms thrown in there like bnha or op LAST THING I GOOGLED: closest jimmy johns lmao FOLLOWING: 126 FOLLOWERS: ...9 -.- FAVORITE COLOR: does tye-dye count? AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 6ish, with the wish of more LUCKY NUMBER: people really have these? INSTRUMENTS: does a pencil/paintbrush count? WHAT I'M WEARING: if you must know, soft black sweats and a comfy af wonder woman sweatshirt HOW MANY BLANKETS I SLEEP WITH: really depends on the season. Right now, one. DREAM JOBS: editing, publishing, marketing, authoring DREAM TRIP: too many to state FAVORITE FOOD: right now, bomb pops. Which totally count shut up. NATIONALITY: american I guess I'll tag @spicyboikeith. If you wanna broo~ Besides Oli, you're the only other person I've had real conversations with. And everyone else! Yay!

[jojokhaleesi]

Day 8/9ish

Wifi still not fixed lmao

Just stepped out of my freezing cold shower bc my roomie used all the hot water (not accusing her of shit just saying). So I am sitting here in my towel waiting to re -enter the shower bc I could not handle that shit. It is 44 degrees so ya call me crazy but I can’t shower with that coldness. 

So yesterday: We had more orientation stuff and then after we were free to do whatever! So I went with a few girls to get our data (FINALLY) and then we got lunch and shopped a little. It was really fun, we went to this Italian place and ate and talked for 2 hours!! And it was cheap af!! so yay. I like that they don’t rush you here and that drinking during the day is normal and chill. Which leads me to my next point...

Idk if I am going to drink that much!! (Yeah right, I know). But seriously. Last night I had a shit ton of anxiety when I got home, and then more anxiety this morning. I think until I’m 100% comfortable I should just chill out for a little. I think I thought I was chilling and then after last night I was like hahah yeah nope. I didn’t blog bc I don’t want this to be a whole fucking blog just about him!! It’s incredibly frustrating that all of these feelings and emotions are coming now that I am here, but I need to cope/deal. My dreams are incredibly fucking vivid and definitely depict my deepest fears. Like the other night was me hooking up with someone in AEPi and then all of E’s alpha phi friends like harassing and roasting me. Which is a fear of mine: him telling them what I did and them being like yeah fuck her she is a terrible person! It’s insane. I told mc about the situation and she was like you didn’t cheat and all of my friends say I didn’t yet just because he said it I believe it. I really want to be able to just control my own emotions and not get anxiety or judge myself based on someone else’s opinion about a situation. Like I need to think about this.. If I let myself be affected by someone else’s opinion every time I do something, I will probably never do anything for me. So fuck that shit. I am #realizingthings but I think it will just continue to take time. 

So annoyed I would put a gif there or something but it’s honestly not worth it with the wifi. I might go in the main room and try to put something in there.... so we shall see. 

But yeah tonight I am not going to go out THAT LATE because we went out till 4 am last night!! It was crazy... I wasn’t tired but we just got jipped fat. Segway!! 

We met up at this hostel bar and drank with a few people, including two random Canadian guys. Who were so nice! Literally fuck American guys ahahah but seriously they were quite friendly. And we all just talked a little, and then I found another place for all of us to drink. Which ended up being really dank! It was like 14 of us in this tiny table and we had drinks (i had 2 mojitos, which is like a thing here) and talked! I bonded with Gina about having a stepfather which we both don’t really like, so that was nice. And of course we all talked about how we hate Trump, which is nice. I wonder tho if one of the guys in my program voted for Trump because he didn’t say shit. Honestly I just assume everyone has the same morals as me because all of my friends do. We were talking about how we like usc because all of our friends share our same morals. Which I agree with.

Lmao went to take a shower bc I thought the water would have warmed up but it DID NOT!! IT WAS MUCH COLDER. but I still did it cuz I needed to.

Alright back to the story. So we were there and then at like 12:50 more spainards came and they were HOT AF!! Like literally beautiful men. But they don’t usually want to talk to Americans (which I understand) so we were just like so close yet so far. We went to the bathroom together (girl bonding) and I fucking thought I lost my phone but DAB me (really just weed brain me) put it in my back pocket and I forgot lmao. Everyone was so nice though and was trying to help me find my phone!! It was so nice I was like wow people actually care. People in my program are the tits. 

Then we wanted to go to another bar or club, so we walked around and promoters offered us 8 free shots and 8 free drinks. But in reality, it was 1 free shot and 8 free drinks (1 per person) but it was still cool. We were in this bar it was completely black with colored lights and fog machines????? V interesting. But they played Spanish music and then played CLOSER BY THE CHAINSMOKERS and we were all singing and all the spain ppl were like wtf?? This one guy was like trying to grind on me but failed miserable and I was like yeah not gonna happen homie. Then we got bored and left. We went to another place and got a free HOUR of drinks which was dank. I had like 3 things of sangria and we danced, and this bar was fun af. My roomie said the dj was looking at me and I was like shit I still got it!! Also funny she was telling people in my group she was like I didn’t know Marykate was life of the party!! I was like lmaoooo. But yeah this bar had a shit ton of people and played starving by hailee stienfeld or whatever and I lost my shit cuz I love that song!! And that was fun. Then carter fucking was like hold my drink and I was like why and he proceeds to BREAK OUT IN A DANCE BATTLE WITH SOMEONE and I straight up lost my shit. This kid is hilarious and I love him! And I also love him 100% more bc he has a girlfriend. Yeah so we stayed there till like 3ish because we SUPPOSEDLY had free entrance to this club. We get there and they turn us away and were like what the fuck?? Turns out our wristbands say free entry on Sunday.... aka Americans getting scammed. I was mad, but also only spent $20 on the whole night and I drank a sufficient amount. But honestly now that I think about it that is like as much as I spend at Bacaro and I black at that shit. Should I be more fiscally conservative?? I fucking suck at this shit. It will take time. We decided to leave and took an uber home #classic bc the metros were closed, which is extremely stupid considering how late the nights go. 

ok ok I need to go because were going to a dinner and I don’t want to be late and I am currently naked with no clue what I’m wearing and my hair in a fucking towel. Going to the gay district tonight (blessed) and I will blog more later bc I don’t think I will be getting litty. 

Hasta luego <333 

[shytiff]

 August 2021

1 - morning walk with ness mendel to palm hills. my dumb ass decided to do a bit of run. my heart was screaming by the time we hiked lol. continued with some youtube dance work out at mess. had kanayam as always. the fish and chicken somehow tasted even better than usual. afternoon nap. had muesli and simba again. 

2 - a hectic BP slash usila slash mtbs day with dr arief. Tried sop bebek h syafei and sate bandeng. Worked out w renata to a 20 mins pilates vid and 2 madfit songs and one 5 min stretch. Dinner was tofu soun seaweed and egg soup courtesy of renata. And baked banana with ovomaltine lolll im so grateful friends give me food.

3 - in usila today but turns out theres still one more day of vaccine in kantor kecamatan, so nessa and i went. We screened together w dr arief. Finished at about 2 pm. Can finaly eat at like 3ish after getting to the mess. Felt a bit of headache and my nose starts to go runny. So i slept. But my nose was so blocked. So i asked renata for her boiled noodle. Felt a bit better. Cleared my nose. Slept.

4 - it did feel better, finally. The soreness i felt in my abs yesterday gets worse today lmao. BP w nessa. orientation w dr harnis. talked ngalor ngidul about love life et cetera at our room lol

5 - fasted today. sahur was rice, crispy mushroom and abon since i felt sick of eating egg. it seems that love life talk continued today    at BP w dr anggi. printed stuff at kubang wates. bought kepak bandeng at RM tajuk and some snacks in indomaret. turns out Prof gave me one more ppt to do, for PIT. and the manuscript deadline is on the 8th :) immediately started doing something about it since now i know ppt and word making rly takes time

6 - muesli and pizza from alfia for bfast. vaccine today w dr lutfi. talked with kang ade and turns out he lived in kalideres before lol. bought don’s burger for dinner and ate it with fried egg. 

7 - MTBS today. got a lot of free food. read stranger than friends. went to transmart w nessa to buy stuff. did the word for Prof’s PIT topic acompanied with lofi study on the tv accompanied with nescafe latte. taste kinda.. weird. 

8 - ran a bit today, alone. bought nasi uduk for 5000 and i added scrambled egg. continued the word and finished it at like 11 am. sent it. relaxed for a bit. read black mirror. lunch was from labbaik but things went shit and i ended up paying 72k lol. printed document stuff w nessa and went to palm hills in the golden hour. ate together w the gals. played scrabble and talked a bit with fianti until almost 11 pm.

9 - had left over chicken and pizza for bfast. usila today and the patients came back to back. bought kanayam while waiting for 2 pm. slept. did (so little) work of ECMOCARD SAP. im so research dumb. 

10 - had steak and rice and renata’s veggie soup for bfast. vaccine today at vivo near intermedia with teh dian. waited for a mother with 9cm dilatation in ugd with nessa, but it took so long so i went back first. met up with atikah at o seven lmao. she arrived at like 12 and waited at palm wates. tried carbonara sphagetti (yum! but not fulfilling enough) and fried tofu. slept early and i probably passed out at like 930 pm. atikah was talking w ratnaa and we’re talking about the day’s randomness of atikah’s customer that somehow lives in cilegon

11 - woke up late. drove motorbike around palmhills to sightsee a bit. bfast at nasi uduk place around the corner. did some ngambi-together in green wates, accompanied by atikah’s 2 songs, repeated many times. went to mess. ate seafood in merak (a place near billiard cafe). got fish and shrimp. went to pulau kecil with pak asep’s help. walked around the tiny island. saw a monkey. the waters surprisingly clear. and then after maghrib Prof asked me about the ppt lol. so i hurriedly made it and emailed it, with zoom sesh 2mrw

12 - muesli for bfast. a hectic day today at bp x usila with dr lutfi (she went up for a bit for promkes). leftover kangkung and fish for lunch. hurriedly added some stuff to Prof’s ppt before the zoom sesh at 3. did 1 pamela reif vid and “attempted” her 10 min ab workout. dinner was soun and egg and renata’s veggie. 

13 - vaccine day for ODGJ and special needs children ft. dr Arief. finished at like 10:15. bought discounted wingstop (86k for 20 piece). was about to send Prof’s ppt but turns out there’s a ppt from the sponsor. in english. so i had to mold the 2 ppt and do some translation. finally sent it, and the literature. the sponsor used a lot of old literature lol. 

14 - wingstop and rice for bfast. mtbs today. no patient lmao. bu ningrum gave me cimol again! and a snack called selondok. waited out 2 pm with nessa. there’s a mom that came with upper abdominal pain. it did not improve after ranitidine, so she was referred. mom dad etc came to cilegon. i vacuumed. bujing lia had itches within like 15 mins of entering my room :(( lol. since the bed was put out, renata and i slept in yoga mat lol. nessa went to damkar. but i dreamed of something that night.

15 - mom’s spaghetti for bfast. off to pulau besar at 7 am. walked around the island a bit. swam in pulau kecil. ate at saung bonang (<50k per person!). tidied up the hydrovacuumed bed. a 20 ish minute ab and glutes workout with renata. love life talk. accidentally turned on live video in cld lmao. talked with aisyah due to said live vid. gave some brownies and spaghetti to mendel lol. dinner was mom’s chicken, kentang balado and capcay. 

16 - usila today. lots of patients with dizziness. ate mom’s chicken and spicy potato for lunch. 

17 - free day today. picked up my towel from sodaqo laundry. nasi uduk for breakfast. lazed. washed my undies. lunch was meat soup made by renata. watched run bts while eating indomie. watched extreme job (quite hilarious). filled my logbook. slept at like 12 am

18 - spaghetti for bfast. no patient at kia. promkes about hypertension. some patients at igd today. my mistake today was not realizing the pneumonia on a 8months patient with severely dehydrated diarrhea :( there’s also a 4 yo child whose fever did not improve after like 3 hrs and pct and compress. i have to be better :(. lunch was kanayam. bought chatime together with ness tri. tried lychee milk tea and the taste did not combine well at all. imagined better productivity with nessa even though its less likely to happen lmaooo

19 - fasted and had nongshim carbonara dry ramen for sahur. BP today. Almost bought martabak but its just keBMan on my part.

20 - vaccine day today. Filled logbook. went to mess and went back again to cibeber through the rain when i was called by the teteh. Helped the delivery (the mcroberts, to be exact), and got some hecting. The midwives were rly kind :) ness ren were sleeping so i got some silence for myself. It was nice. Tidied some stuff and slept

21 - mtbs. Whatsapp class for pregnant woman abt c19 vaccine. Bought martabak hokky medium (50k,green tea, chocolate, ceres and cheese). Turns out alfia also bought martabak assen. Fried mom's chicken and ate it with renata's porridge. Movie night, watched under the gods 1 along with popcorn

22 - woke up kinda late if i wanted to run, but the weather was cloudy and nice, so i went out at 7:15ish. ran a bit towards KS complex behind mess. walked through a jogging track, empty houses, krakatau bike park. played badminton with tri. washed undies. ate mom’s food for bfast slash lunch. napped a bit. off to o seven, bringing mom’s brownies. ordered green tea latte (25k), it tasted sweet and i had to remind myself that its not matcha lol. did some logbook and literature search for prof’s ppt. ate renata’s broccoli. folded clothes. tried nessa’s scarlett scrub. put on some lotion. mask. turned on fianti’s candle (smells rly nice and calming!). vcall with fi, scrabble and some talks. and suddenly its 11pm

23 - usila today. quite a lot of patients, so much that i was thirsty. dr yanti called since she needs some preskas docx. lol so sudden. bought mizone and dimsum kuy (10.5k with gofood pickup promo). the dimsum was good and fulfilling. didnt do anything else much in the mess. read a painter behind the curtain. it was rly rly good. all the characters made sense and had great insight. some are assholes (im looking at u, Raymond). ate the keripik mom bought from sidimpuan. first time actually trying it. its actually not that spicy lmao i used to think its the spiciest thing in the world. banana, brownies and protein shake for din din.

24 - empty KIA today. no promkes. or UGD patients. some mentoring on preeclampsia by dr Arif. went to BNI but turns out our card havent been activated yet.  cooked mom’s sphagetti sauce (thats not enough amount) along with egg and cheese. yum. had banana brownies and protein for dinner. started trial to blinkist

25 - BP today. reasonable amount of patients, accompanied by blinkist. tried ngikan by gofood pickup (17.5k). i still prefer kanayam’s fish and nasi liwet. a pregnant woman came to UGD. so i went back at like 7 pm, but turns out the mom went back home lmao. mas apit said i shouldve contacted him. point taken. so a nicely lit cafe along the way to pkm called Serada, so i tried it. It has industrial vibes. Got latte (25k). did some logbook. Read some blinks in bed

26 - vaccine today. Both screening and getting moderna lol. My arm hurts. So far no fever. bought roti O croissant and the usual coffee bread for 12k using gofood. Watched weathering with you. Turned on the candle. Read blinks

27 - arm hurts. but thankfully its mtbs. slept while waiting until 2. kanayam sambal matah for lunchie. finally took PCT that solved my headache and incoming fever and arm pain bcs i dont want to stumble while on the motorbike. watched harry potter #1. washed clothes and filled some logbook, powered by left over serada latte. need to sleep so i wont wake up late 2mrw

28 - mass vaccination in SMP RJ with mendel kak esa. 800ish patients. Lots of food and snacks and coffee. Picked up by mom and dad. Slept on the way. And like magic, when i open my eyes im at the airport. Basking in the silence of my room

29 - relaxed. Moms nasgor for bfast. Met up with atikah puy in kopi sedjenak. Tried their croffle with nutella. Went to racheels since its her online grad day. There were also sil and dev. Lotsss of food was eaten that day. Doughnuts, moms brownies, fruits, phd bigbox. Atikah and puy also came along to racils. Had lots of fun talk.

30 - sahur. Off to cilegon. A bit of road fixture was going on. Stopped in the rest area since i wanted to pee. KIA/ugd today. There was a patient who had an accident with a truck. Her nails were falling off. I panicked when Prof asked for his ppt so i hurriedly finished it. Had moms chicken for iftar. Fell asleep after maghrib

31 - usila. Renata fried bakwan and tofu and fish and chicken. Lotsss of fries yum. We played with makeup and ness set up her ling light. I imitated jks tattoo using eyeliner lol. Did the word for Prof. Jk went live for his bday!! I listened until i fell asleep (lol hes still going)