#made this is abt an hour bc i wanted to do a little color study :)

[thesapphiccrytid]

Falin?

[coelakanths]

mx krow u seem to kno many things about many subjects, all of them v cool. I want to pick apart your brain and study u. but I will not because that is not nice to do to friends. can you please imprint some random facts u know upon me instead please.

pick apart my brain all u want there isnt a lot up there!!!! here r some fun facts for u

- the deepest part in the ocean is called the challenger deep and is 10924 meters down!!! two guys went there once it took like four hours and was fucking terrifying 

- morels are a type of mushroom that ppl have yet to figure out how to cultivate which is why theyre so expensive! you can find them most commonly under elm trees in mid april (right now!) and they look WEIRD like little porous cones (false morels look more like brains-- dont look up either if trypophobic!)

- roly polies have blood thats blue when oxidized!! this is bc they have hemocyanin which contains copper instead of hemoglobin which contains iron (what we have). they also sometimes turn a pretty blue color when they get sick!

- millipedes were one of the very first creatures to go on land!

- whales and dolphins breathe air bc they evolved to go on land but then went back to water for some reason!!

- the oarfish is the longest bony fish clocking in at 26 ft long (8 meters)!! they live in the deep sea and are seen as omens of tsunamis or earthquakes if they surface. they taste very gelatinous!

- not rlly a fact but heres a website where u can scroll thru the ocean it made me cry once :]

- there are no lightning bugs on the west coast!!!! i found this one out when my grandma came to visit and spent the whole time marveling abt the lightning bugs and i jokingly asked ‘what, do they not have them on the west coast?’ and she was like ‘no lol’

:] have a good day bug

[r0h1rr1m]

rambly inception thoughts p.2

this has been kicked off, specifically, by disliking that i failed to include yusuf in this post but there’s already so much going on there re: exact limits/mechanics of imagination in dreams, how to call down projections, moral relativism, crack chara psych, and speculating on the future of ari’s career--and i explained most of it poorly anyway so it’s probably for the best!

to start with, i’ve always imagined that there’s a huge variety in the caliber/class of chemist u can hire in dreamshare. the title probably applies even to people whose capability starts and stops at sourcing base product for somnacin and/or the finished drug. the next level up can maybe mix up different kinds to standard specifications. idk how much education/training u’d need to be able to do this, bc i v much do not chemistry, but i’d bet there’s a lot of variety in ppl’s qualifications in this category, too. a standard formula might affect different ppl slightly differently, like any psychotropic drug (is that even the most sensible analogy to real-world science? idk and i don’t want to risk hours of ultimately fruitless wikipedia spiralling), but in the same vein, the variances will all probably fall within a reasonable range of the same functionality. without, like, some sort of neuro degree, probably, the most fine-tuning a chemist could do is optimize doses/known variants of the drug through trial and error in preparation for a job.

our man yusuf definitely has a high-level neuro degree

so, just like the rest of the team, yusuf is obviously a total powerhouse in his field. like i said, it must take sophisticated knowledge of brain chemistry in order to do what he did on the fischer job, as well as the same mad genius as the rest of them. (as an aside, can i just say how utterly delightful a team dynamic is “group of geniuses who surround themselves with enough people who are the same kind of batshit to normalize it”? i’m weak) and idk how someone gets famous in like neurochem but yusuf is so brilliant he was probably p well known. js imagine the comedic potential of whatever rising-star chemist meeting yusuf and js going dr. ____?! who published those completely revolutionary but completely balls-to-the-wall studies on x and then after throwing the discipline into an uproar either a) dropped off the face of the earth and is now known as smth of an urban legend/cryptid in the community or b) still corresponds w experts in the field but now about the wildest shit and ppl kind of have to mythologize/not think too hard abt the dude who walks in ppl’s heads in order not to risk js breaking everything

so yusuf knows his shit and his initial assertion that 3 levels is impossible can be trusted to carry a lot of weight. which means the fact that he proceeded to do it more than secures his place in the cast of demonstrable prodigies

now, bc this is ostensibly a continuation of a post that’s loosely focused on charas’ moralities, let’s look at the 2 parts of the movie where we most directly confront yusuf’s: his dream den and hiding the sedation from the team. i’m going with the assumption that any legitimate/legal research and application of dreamshare has been discontinued.

come yell at me for over oversimplifying, but that makes the question of the dream den seem p straight-forward. yusuf faced giving up dreamshare research (or came onto the scene after it was already illegal, which could make for some rly interesting stories abt how he would’ve found out abt it) and couldn’t, so he had to find a way to continue on his own. and since it would be in rly bad faith to assume he doesn’t have the full consent of all his test subjects, that’s js that. (i’m not going to argue abt the difference b/w ethics and morals, and i’m laughably unqualified to discuss the ethics of human experimentation anyway so moving on)

hiding the fact that the team was sedated was a major plot point and is discussed w according frequency, so i’m sure most ppl have their own opinions abt what this says abt the parties involved. i’ll readily admit that my view is heavily colored by the fact that i js plain like yusuf. he’s a likeable guy. (i’ll try not to go off on a tangent, but i know that my reasons for disliking cobb are a little unfair; it’s more about narrative structure than any of his personal failings. the fact is i have a weakness for hypercompetence, and cobb is presented as someone who used to be the best, but is no longer reliable. he shows flashes of his old brilliance running the mr. charles gambit successfully and improvising capitalizing on the appearance of fisher’s browning projection on l2, but he’s desperate enough to be untrustworthy and further, he’s untrustworthy in a way that is eminently predictable by the audience. we know from the get-go that his shade is gonna sabotage something, and it’s hard not to blame him for that. we also know from the get-go that he’s desperate enough to drag other ppl into a fool’s mission, and that he’s hiding something dangerous from arthur, who by all appearances should be the person cobb can trust, and the person to whom it’s most important to know that kind of shit. i’m not gonna pretend i anticipated that big twist in the parking garage on l1, but it makes a ton of sense in retrospect and all this makes it easy to see why cobb is so widely mistrusted/disliked by the fandom. and i went off on a tangent, whoops.)

so picking back up at yusuf is a likeable guy--he seems p friendly and easy-going and i thoroughly enjoyed every scene of him on l1. i’m gonna say a lot of his moral considerations come in the form of deciding what is or isn’t his responsibility. mbe he avoided or suitably resolved the thorny ethical question of human experimentation in the same way i kind of did: by saying that the participants agreed to it on their own and leaving it there. this kind of reasoning is how he would’ve let cobb take responsibility for sedating and then informing the team. it’s also probably how he decided to cue the kick early on l1 and make it everyone else’s problem. which i do think was the right decision! it would be absurd to suggest that this highly intelligent man’s patterns of reasoning are always questionable. but i do see a pattern.

as for the advice he’d give ari, i think a lot of this relates back to my mention in the earlier post of whether or not she could let an institution/legislation dictate her ethics to her. i’ve since decided that it’s simpler to assume the institutions are all outside the law, though, so i’m not going to think abt that anymore unless directly prompted. one thing we do know abt ari, though, in contrast to my suppositions abt yusuf, is that she has a v strong sense of responsibility. she took it upon herself to manage cobb, and she took it upon herself to save the job, fisher, saito, and cobb when it looked like everything had been ruined. thinking abt it now, this makes for further interesting contrast w arthur, whose sense of responsibility seems to revolve around personal loyalty, eames, whose sense of responsibility is acutely pragmatic, and saito, whose sense of responsibility is on the grand scale of stopping a monopoly (suitably ironic).

again, idk if i’ve rly made any kind of point, and now i want to go back and build elaborate hierarchies of skill in each job description (architect, extractor, etc) like i kind of did for chemists but, well. if u made it this far bless u, i hope u have a wonderful day. vote

[combat-wombatus]

uHm if you do these and if you want to do it I’d love a bnha matchup <3?

• my name is Aubri, I’m bi but prefer MHA boys tbh. I go by she/her, too.

• I’m a very Gryffindor person. (Sorry if you don’t know Harry Potter - 😖)

• I’m a June cancer, and I have ADHD and anxiety. My anxiety can be literally crippling somedays, but it’s gotten better overtime.

• I’m a bit of a class clown and usually just a clown 🤡 but that’s irrelevant. My teachers all hate me but like school-wise I do well so we have a love and mostly hate relationship 🤧

• I’m usually the ‘entertaining’ friend, in elementary the popular kids would invite me to play games with them because, “you’re funny” and it was like the biggest achievement ever 😭👍🏻 then they’d ignore me but that’s another therapy session

• I’m usually made fun of by people for being ‘weird’ and ‘insane’. Like all through elementary everyone thought I’d be a criminal when I grew up JUST BECAUSE I HAD UNDIAGNOSED ADHD - I hate it here 😐🦶🏻

• I’ve always been super into crime stories/true crime (where my anxiety comes from, I’m always worried about a pesky serial killer just killing me. It’s usually being kidnapped tho lmao) so I knew and still know like all these murder facts and sometimes I’d just randomly be like;

“Hey did you know it takes 12 hours and 2 days to dissolve a body in acid?”

or

“If you bury a dead deer over a dead body you buried deep in the ground, when police dogs sniff it and people dig they’ll just think it was the deer and won’t dig any farther.”

• So maybe people had a reason to be scared of me and think I’ll be a criminal someday, i dunno.

• I love love love reading and writing, and also debating. The things I’ve wanted to be when I grow up are basically: Dog shelter worker, actress, FBI agent, politician, and a writer. But usually I just want to do something that makes a positive impact on people. Like i wanted to be an FBI agent to solve crimes for people. I wanted to be a politican so I could actually help a lot of people. The entertainment industry also seemed like a way to make people happy. Idk, but then I decided I couldn’t be a politican at 10 because they were all corrupt and to be one I would have to be too. 😫🤌🏻 we love some good childhood angst

• the only subjects I’ve ever excelled at are ELA and Social Studies aka History, and Math I can’t do to save my life. ELA comes easy for me and I usually don’t have to work that hard and/or get too stressed over it. But I always get the meanest teachers for some reason. For example, one time I did my final essay for like 30% of my grade in 30 minutes the day it was due and I got an A+ 🦟🦗🦟🦗

• Uhhh id describe myself as a pretty loyal friend, I’m a ride or die type of girl. A story from my childhood that summarizes it pretty well is when I was in 2nd grade my friend wet her pants and she didn’t want to go to the nurse for it alone so I peed my pants so I could go with her and she wouldn’t have to be alone. Like, you know, a professional problem solver

• and I have genuinely attacked people for fucking with my friends but don’t snitch pls 🕳🏃‍♀️💨

• But also just anyone, people at my school tend to come to me with their problems for me to either help solve them by reasoning, or just to confront the other person like the bad bleep I am 😈😈

• I also have a huge daydreaming problem, it’s literally maladaptive daydreaming. So paired with my ADHD I don’t get shit done like ever.

• I have really high empathy levels I guess, like I always say hi to everyone I see on the street, especially if they look sad 😔 I’ve done it ever since I was a little kiddo.

• My fashion sense is very much a preppy/alt style. I wear those ripped tights and fishnets, I also have the MOST BIZARRE JEWELRY- like who allowed me to buy the gummy worm glittery earrings, hmmm???????? and those Mary Janes???????

• But I love crew necks and pleated skirts so I always obide by the National “hoes dont get cold” policy 🇺🇸😫🦅

• I wanna move somewhere someday, I don’t want to stay in America for very long

• I can speak Latin, French, and my native language which is English.

• My music taste varies, but my all-time favorite artists who all of their music they’ve ever put out has been my favorites are, Billie Eilish, Melanie Martinez, and Conan Gray.

• I no-joke have a sign in my front yard that says;

In ✍️ this ✍️ house we ✍️ don’t ✍️ worship Jesus ✍️ but instead ✍️ Melanie ✍️ Martinez

• My favorite shows are MHA (duh), The Promised Neverland, and Malcolm in The Middle.

• and I’m not going to tell you what I prefer in a partner, because that ruins the fun 😤

• but I will say I cannot be friends with someone who doesn’t really make me laugh. Like I’m used to doing most of the talking in convos but if you’re just boring I’m sorry it’s nothing personal but no thanks 😐✌🏻

• About my physical appearance, I have fluffy n curly brown hair, but when it’s in the sunlight it looks sort of brown but golden yk?? It’s shoulder length :) I have bleach blonde streaks in the front. I like wearing eyeliner most days, too. I’m pretty average size/ on the skinnier side. Kinda high key inscure abt my body bc I got flat shamed in elementary EVEN THOUGH I HAVE TIDDIES NOW- whatever 😤🙄. I also have crystal type blue eyes, and I do have fairly big eyes. But, like, not weirdly big. A good big. My cheekbones are ALWAYS PRESENT so sometimes I get called a Tim Burton character but it’s cool ig ☠️☠️ oh and I’m kinda short. I’m 5’3, even though my doctor said I’d be 5’7. I feel like I was either tricked by the doctor or someone just stole my destined height while I was asleep. It’s probably cause I didn’t keep an eye out for Selener ��� 😔😔

• I’m a definite night owl, like all of my energy comes at night which really sucks cuz I can’t do much since everyone else is asleep.

• My love language is touch starved so I’ve never figured it out ✌🏻😗🔫

• but I am an attention whore so idk 😏

• I’m a huge introvert with social anxiety. It isn’t as bad as it used to be cuz I used to not be able to like go to restaurants but now I’m much better.

• I’m a huge history person, mostly like sad history LMFAO. Uh but a lot of my hyperfixations have been on history. Some examples are The Roman Empire, Julius Caesar himself, Anne Frank, The Titanic, the Black Plauge, Helen Keller, Marie Curie, Slavery in the US, Joan of Arc, and just a lot more. I always love talking about these things if someone would let me ramble to them but no one ever does 😖 it also got to a point where for all these subjects I’d go to the library and try to find a book on them but usually I’d either have already read it or I’d read it and know all the information.

• I’m super into Greek Mythology, I have 7 books filled with the stories, I’m going to Greece maybe this summer to see it’s history, and named my hamster Aphrodite but we call her Aphie. I also will talk about this forever and ever if you let me.

• My favorite color is yellow, my favorite food is literally nothing I never have an appetite, my favorite planet is Saturn, favorite song is Tag Your It by Melanie Martinez atm but it changes like everyday.

• Music is a huge safe-space for me if I’m feeling down or having a panic attack. It calms me down n is overall my coping mechanism 💃🏻💃🏻

• Biggest fear is spiders, even looking at one gives me a panic attack and I cannot sleep at all for that night, adding to my insomniac ass 🧎🏻‍♂️🏌️‍♀️

• I’m mature for my age, I don’t exactly like hanging around kids my age and I get along better with older crowds.

• i don’t like conventional dates, (I PROMISE IM NOT TRYING TO SOUND ‘QUIRKY’ AHAHA) I kind of like having a best-friend type partner more so dates that aren’t as romantic as like the movies or a fancy restaurant suite me better. My dream date is playing Monopoly on my bedroom floor 🦧

• Also I hate getting gifts. End of story. If someone gets me a gift like awe that’s nice but never again, I’d prefer to get you one. Especially in a romantic partner 😐 i keep a journal of my friends’ interests and hobbies so I can get them the perfect gifts for their bdays and Christmas’s. Been doing this ever since 4th grade.

• Though I don’t have much actual experience with relationships🧍🏻‍♀️

• I’m a huge believer in ‘family isn’t blood, it’s who you make it’ because I have a pretty shitty family life and my childhood has been trash. My friends are my family to me.

• Also if my friends don’t like my romantic partner ✨ GOODBYE ✨. Sorry girlie, bros before hoes 🦨💨

I was going to put more but I’m so so sorry for how LONG AND COMPLICATED THIS IS- idk if this is a autobiography or a matchup at this point 🤦‍♀️ don’t feel pressured to do this and if matchups aren’t open IM SO SO SORRY LMAO uh yeah ilysm 🦎🎂🧃

OMG ASLDFKJHASLKDJH

🥺 i’m so sorry bby but matchups are closed ;-; my 100 follower event was over while ago (i guess i should’ve specified that in the asks i answered LKSAJHFLKJAHDS SORRY IT’S MY BAD) but you sound so cool?? i had a lot of the same hyperfixations interests (heLLO helen keller was badass AF and the roman empire was messed up but still v cool, anne frank was awesome too) i also may or may not have wanted to be a politician when i was younger alskdjfhalkdhj but now i’m just 🧍🏻‍♀️ lost and anyways you’re amazing >.< love u lots and don’t forget to drink water and eat a lil something hehe :p 

[bluestm]

                *     𝖌𝖗𝖊𝖊𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖉 𝖔𝖓𝖊𝖘   .    y’all  ever  wondered  what  an  actual  angel  looks  like ?  lemme  point  y’all  in  the  direction  of  oNE  zendaya  coleman ,  blessing  to  humans  everywhere . i’m  taking  the  torch  from  ares  n  her  beautiful  rendition  to  try  and  keep  this  lil  goddess  on  the  dash  in  the  form  of  my  darling  soft  sarcastic  fool , 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒆 𝒔𝒕 . 𝒋𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒔 !  

  ⋆  ╰  another   year  at  hollingsworth  ,  another  year  of  the  big  six rivalry  .  i  hear  that  BLUE  ST.  JAMES is  ensuring  CHI MU OMEGA  gets  a  solid  pledge  class  and  stays  at  the  top  of  the  ranks  .  oh  ,  you’re  not  familiar  with  HER  ?  BLUE  is  the  ZENDAYA  look  alike  from  SEATTLE , WASHINGTON  .  a part  of  PC  ‘16  ,  she  is  majoring  in  HISTORY  and  has  plans  to  AUDITION  FOR  THE  AMERICAN  BALLET  THEATER  AND  REBUILD  HER  CRUMBLING  DANCE  CAREER after  undergrad  .  it  makes  sense  they  pledged  their  house  ,  their  SHARP-WITTED  &  ASSIDUOUS   attributes  make  them  perfect  matches  .  however  ,  their  ACQUIESCENT  &  OBSESSIVE  attributes  keep  their  name  alive  on  greek  rank  .  if  you  don’t  catch  them  dancing  to  SUPERMODEL  -  SZA  at  a  fraternity  band  party  this  year  ,  you’ll  be  sure  to  catch  them  nursing  their  morning  hangover  at  THE  CHI O  HOUSE  .  cheers  to  another  wild  semester !

⋆  ╰    𝑺  𝑻  𝑨  𝑻  𝑰  𝑺  𝑻  𝑰  𝑪  𝑺   .

𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍        𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 :         blue    ocean    st . james   𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬         :        i  applaud  u  if  u  can  make  a  nickname  out  of  “ blue “ 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆        /        𝒂𝒈𝒆 :        september    3rd  ,    twenty  -  one  𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄         :        virgo 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓        𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚        /        𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔         :         cisfemale    identifying        with        she   /  her   /   hers    pronouns           𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏         :         openly    pansexual    ,  panromantic 𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏        :           student   at   hworth   majoring    in    history     (   with   a   focus   in   the  history   of   art    and    literature    )  and    minoring   in    african  -  american  studies   ,    aspiring    pro   ballerina   𝒉𝒐𝒈𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔        𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆        :        hufflepuff 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐��        𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒅        𝒃𝒚         :       amy   from  booksmart   (  !!!!  ) ,  rory   gilmore    from  gilmore   girls   ,    stiles   stilinski   from  teen  wolf    (  !!!!!!!!! )   ,  grace  cardinal  &   cam  saunders  from  degrassi .       𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒔      :        -        melancholic  ,    overly-critical   ,    obsessive   , neurotic ,  teeteringly  non-confrontational   ,    astray   , acquiescent  ,  craven

         +                benevolent    , magnanimous    ,  tactful ,  inventive   ,   perfectionist ,   steadfast ,  sharp-witted   ,   rigorous  ,  assiduous  , sympathetic  

⋆  ╰      𝑨  𝑵  𝑻  𝑬  𝑪  𝑬  𝑫  𝑬  𝑵  𝑻 .

my  concept  was  that  her  mom  ,  sonya  ackerman  ,  was  a  world-renowned  ballerina  ,  like  one  of  the  first  on  the  east  coast  and  had  a  massive  studio  that  took  off  in  seattle  as  one  of  the  premier  ballet  academies  for  dancers  of  color !her  dad  ,  theodore  st.  james  ,  was  a  criminal  prosecutor  training  to  become  an  assistant  district  attorney  in  georgia  ,   but  would  commute  out  to  washington  bc  obv  blue’s  mom  isn’t  gonna  just  abandon  what  she  worked  so  hard  to  build  .  her  parents  were  a  rather  stable  couple  ,  but  blue  can  easily  admit  what  a  piece  of  work  her  mom  was  and  the  fucking  number  she  did  on  those  around  her

part  of  pushing  so  hard  for  success  meant  having  a  lot  to  lose  ,  and  sonya  made  that  the  driving  point  of  not  just  her  life  ,  but  her  only  child’s  ,  a  bright-eyed  baby  girl  with  a  gaze  as  pensive  and  thought-provoking  as  the  color  she  was  named  after  .  blue  ocean  was  a  miracle  ,  a  gentle (  but  rather  prone  to fixating  )  soul  from  the  moment  her  curls  came  into  the  light  of  this  world  ,  and  was  her  father’s  pride  since  the  moment  he  held  her  .  suddenly  commutes  were  that  much  harder  ,  the  tension  of  having  a  marriage  and  a  daughter  only  on  the  weekends  and  being  left  a  stranger  to  your  own  child  all  because  of  your  wife’s  unyielding  stubbornness  really  did  a  number  on  theodore  which  led  to  the  eventual  demise  of  their  marriage  :/

blue  doesn’t  remember  much  leading  up  to  the  divorce  ,  but  she’s  smart  enough  to  recognize  her  dad  didn’t  just  up  and  leave  out  of  nowhere  .  he  later  tells  her  he  was  sure  he’d  get  at  least  shared  custody  ,  but  the  courts  surprisingly  ruled  in  sonya’s  favor  with  no  rational  logic  behind  it  other  than  her  claim  of  motherhood  .  being  raised  with  the  world’s  weight  on  her  shoulders  hugely  influenced  blue’s  personality  ,  ballet  being  the  only  thing  she  remembers  as  a  constant  in  her  life  .  never  one  to  lash  out  ,  blue  took  the  oppressive  upbringing  as  an  opportunity  to  prove  herself  —  maybe  this  wasn’t  her  dream  ,  but  she  was  a  perfectionist  obsessed  with  control  ,  and  she’d  take  whatever  path  her  mother  put  her  on  and  do  a  damn  good  job  at  it .

highschool  was  highschool  and  she  was  gone  almost  as  soon  as  she  had  arrived  ,  graduating  with  only  enough  friends  that  she  could  count  on  her  hand  ,  and  whisked  off  to  the  city  in  which  she  had  heard  in  countless  of  her  mother’s  nostalgic  throw-back  stories  growing  up  ,  attending  julliard’s  prestigious  ballet  program  as  if  to  honor  her  late  mother’s  legacy  at  her  alma  mater .  

excelling  through  classes  ,  nailing  audition  after  audition  for  a  coups  de  ballet  role  but  never  a  principal  ,  blue  builds  her  reputation  among  the  new  york  dance  scene  with  grace  and  humility  ,  inching  her  way  towards  her  ultimate  goal  of  the  american  ballet  theater  as  paved  by  misty  copeland  ,  the  only  hero  who  even  compares  to  her  mother  in  blue’s  eyes  .  she’s  just  a  few  more  well-timed  performances  away  from  the  life  she’s  always  envisioned  ,  until  a  sudden  phone  call  flips  her  life  on  it’s  head  .  she  hasn’t  addressed  her  mother’s  passing  ,  nor  its  details  ,  and  it’s  unlikely  a  person  with  such  an  emotionally  reserved  disposition  such  as  herself  will  ever  really  come  around  to  processing  it  out  loud  .  the  news  hits  halfway  through  sophomore  year  and  she  makes  it  until  finals  week  before  she  spends  a  week  in  the  hospital  ,  unravelled  and  unhinged  ,  dehydrated  from  her  sobs  and  weak  from  her  inability  to  keep  food  down  due  to  an  unrelenting  anxiety  she’s  never  known  quite  like  this  .  this  subtle  childhood  nature  of  fixation  and  perfection  manifests  as  a  full  blown  obsessive  compulsive  disorder  diagnosed  during  her  psych  eval  ,  releasing  her  with  a  script  and  a  recommendation  to  go  somewhere  where  she’s  got  a  support  system  .

hu  ,  only  a  half  hour  drive  from  her  father’s  firm  and  the  current  school  of  her  childhood  best  friend  ,  receives  an  application  days  later  ,  declaring  an  interest  in “ a  change  of  pace  from  the  world  of  ballet  and  an  interest  in  their  world-renowned  history  program .  ” she  gets  sucked  into  the  greek  world  without  truly  meaning  to  ,  wandering  aimlessly  through  her  new  life  as  she  auditions  for  different  ballet  troupes  and  bombs  each  attempt  .  feeling  empty  ,  distant  ,  and  the  impending  sense  of  personal  failure  ,  her  new  sisters  in  chi  mu  omega  give  her  a  constant  push  of  go-go-go  to  fill  her  days  with  a  distraction  from  her  thoughts  .  senior  year  rounds  its  head  ,  and  blue  wants  to  spend  it  pushing  herself  to  return  to  her  former  glory  ,  eyeing  the  next  year’s  productions  at  the  american  ballet  theater  and  her  dream  to  once  again  reach  the  point  she  receives  an  invitation  to  audition  .  she’s  not  quite  sure  if  this  will  fill  the  void  in  her  heart  ,  a  void  she’s  sure  she’s  known  nearly  her  whole  life  ,  but  she’s  got  nothing  prepared  in  her  back  pocket  ,  so  it’s  really  ,  at  this  point  ,  all  she  has  left  .

⋆  ╰      𝑨  𝑵  𝑨  𝑳  𝒀  𝑺  𝑰  𝑺  .

for  a  lil  personality  blurb  ,  my  renditions  of  blue  have  always  been  really  soft  and  nuturing  and  i  want  to  keep  an  element  of  that  ? she’s  a  gentle  soul  and  part  of  that  absolutely  stems  from  her  upbringing  bc  her  mom  was  ..  .  .  .  not  a  nice  lady  lmao  .  but  somehow  ,  between  her  mom  at  home  and  then  her  mom  in  the  ballet  studio  ,  it  just  made  blue  more  compassionate  ?  she’s  admittedly  a  little  intimidating  ,  and  her  defense  mechanism  has  become  a quick  wit  that  manifests  most  amusingly  in  her  sarcasm  .  the  world  can’t  hurt  u  if  u  make  fun  of  it  first  ,  right ! i  also  wanted  to  sprinkle  in  a  little  bit  of  doe-eyed  buffoon  which  i  think  fits  in  well  with  her  whole  quiet  type  persona  ,  so  her  humor  deviates  into  goofiness  that  also  occasionally  manifests  as  an  awkward  as  shit  interaction  if  she’s  feeling  a  little  off ( as  in  :  the  bitch  has  a 50/50  shot  of  delivering  a  SEARING  burn  or  stammering  so  hard  she  ends  up  rlly  just  roasting  herself  :/  it’s  a  mystery  to  see  what  u’ll  end  up  w  when  it  comes  to  blue  ,  sigh )

delving  in  a  little  deeper  ,  even  if  she  seems  like  this  sarcastic  scattered lowkey  dork ,  who  gives  the  illusion  she’s  mellow  and  unbothered  ,  she’s  a  severe  overthinker  and  any  convo  longer  than  about  10  minutes  will  yield  to  the  fact  that  blue  is  constantly  stressed  the  FUCK  out about  the  smallest  things  .  she’s  really  observant  and  has  an  uncanny  ability  to  clock  ppl  ,  which  would  make  her  QUITE  the  devilish  fiend  to  exploit  ppl’s  weaknesses  but  alas  ,  for  a.  she  does  not  give  a  shit  abt  anything  enough  to  treat  people  cruelly  and b.  does  not  have  enough  braincells  to  spare  from  her  stress  and  misery  to  be  fiendish  and  manipulative  KSDJFKJSDHF  this  makes  her  a  really  great  person  to  tell  secrets  to  bc  literally  who  the  FUCK  is  she  gonna  tell ?  is  her  argument  n  lowkey !  she  right ! SDFHSKDHF  

contrary  to  what  her  performance  background  may  lead  many  to  believe  ,  she  really  is  not  fond  of  being  at  the  forefront  of  attention  and  feels  more  comfortable  lingering  in  the  background  ,  minding  her  own  business ,  and  staying  in  her  lane  so  catch  her  being  all  but  INVISIBLE  to  the  greek  rank  blog  !  her  critical  struggle  in  life  is  her  obsessive  personality  ,  deeply  rooted  in  the  trauma  of  being  riased  with  the  unyielding  expectation  for  absolute  perfection  .  she  has  a  hard  time  letting  go  and  comes  close  to  having  a  meltdown  if  things  in  her  world  arent  completely  under  her  control  (  as  exemplified  by  the  mental  breakdown  faced  during  the  most  stressful  time  in  her  life  .  )  she’s  incredibly  hard  on  herself  and  really  ,  truly  is  lost  as  to  who  she  is  without  the  fixation  of  perfection  in  her  life  .  this  is  incredibly  curious  due  to  her  selective  nature  —  in  terms  of  grades  ,  she’s  only  slightly  above  average  ,  and  is  rarely  interested  in  being  competitive  with  other  people  .  it’s  almost  exclusively  a  competition  with  herself  regarding  the  most  interesting  and  unassuming  things  : especially  considering  that  ballet  ,  her  whole  life’s  work  and  effort  ,  isn’t  even  her  PASSION  .  on  the  low  ,  she  kinda  hates  dance  culture  ,  especially  the  ridigity  of  ballet  !  like  bitch  wha t  the  FU C K  are  u  working  so  hard  on  it  for  ?  n  that’s  one  of  her  major  fears  ,  deviating  from  what  she  knows  and  pursing  her  true  passions  ,  because  at  least  with  ballet  ,  she  knows  it  and  she  knows  she’s  naturally  exceptional  — something  she  can’t  guarantee  with  her  true  passions  ( yet  tbd  but  have  something  to  do  with  art  history    !  ) and  would  rather  not  pursue  if  the  option  of  failure  ,  aka non-perfection ,  is  something  she’d  have  to  face  .

hcs  : she  doesn’t  drive  bc  she  doesn’t  have  her  license  as  she  has  rlly  bad  test  anxiety  and  ate  shit  all  4  times  she  tried  to  take  it  (  suffice  the  implication  of  her  failure  rests  in  the  sulking  pout  she  wore  for  about  2  weeks  straight  as  she  refused  to  try  again  a  5th  time )  ,  is  an  on  and  off  vegetarian  and  HATES  herself  for  it  ,  usually  that  friend  who’s  goin  “  i’m  not  sure  about  this  guys  ..  .  ..  ”    while  still  allowing  herself  to  get  dragged  into  shenanigans  ,  hates  her  own  drama  n  avoids  it  but  wants  to  BATHE  in  the  tea  of  those  goin  on  around  her  sdfsdfs  ,  goes  to  bed  at  9:30  on  the  dot  so  parties  are  oft  a  STRUGGLE  ,  has  strong  mom  friend  energy  despite  barely  being  able  to  manage  herself  ,  is  a  nerd  n  knows  it  yet  uses  nerd  as  an  insult  ,  cannot  cook  for  her  LIFE  ,  and  a  lil  pinterest  board  is     here   ! oh  !  and  she  does  NOT   fuck  w   being  touched  unless  u  get  her  express  approval !!!

plots  :  i  didnt  think  i  would  get  this  far  in  one  go  so  hit  me  up  on  dis/cord  for  my  list  of  plots  that  im  abt  to  pull  out  of  my  ass  ;))))

[sicnnavalmxnt]

[ danielle campbell, 20, cisfemale  ] - oh, that’s sienna valmont ? i hear they’re a sophomore and lives in woodbridge hall, maybe you’ve met them ? i think they’re majoring in drama and theatre arts. anyway, word around campus is that she is magnetic but also mercurial. i guess we’ll bump into her sooner or later.

me? throwing my intro into the tag early for once ? and not.. 10 hours late?? miracles rlly do happen! no but fr hllo all it is i, sage ur local goblin admin coming 2 u live frm the est tz. my dumbass made plans for brunch so i am sadly missing the opening but me n my food bby will be popping on as soon as i can. anyways, i am the worst at intros so im jus gonna get right into my child below!!  give this a like n i will swoop into ur ims throwing glitter 2 plot!  (not clickbait)

aesthetics: A bouquet of roses thrown into the trash. she is the nonchalance and sarcasm of finger guns. cherry flavored lollipops used as accessories, the beauty of a swearword, and red velvet ribbons in her hair. faux fur and heart shaped sunglasses.  worn leather jackets and vibrant colored cigarettes dangling from her fingers while she dances around empty paris streets. prancing down alleyways hunting for brunch on a lazy sunday afternoon, and leaving love notes in the mirror with her lipstick before sneaking out the door.

OK SO The Valmont’s born and bred in NYC own a chain of luxury hotels and fine resorts and basically sienna’s role in her family is to look pretty and keep the Valmont name relevant with prestige.

The Valmont’s like to stay relevant without making terrible headlines in the press or for the sordid things their kids do..they refuse to become or be on the same level as the hilton family. they’re v business savvy and would hate for the valmont name to be tarnished bc of their kids. so they are constantly paying people off to keep things hidden and mute. They run in that affluent circle of the rich and famous; but aren’t necessarily coined as celebrities.

anyways, sienna is always looking to chase after that next high that gets her heart racing or her feet twirling her into chaos… like she is the actual definition of i’m here for a good time.. not a long time!!!

basically i based her off of this quote here: “She’s living in Paris to ‘study art’ as a creative writing student, but really she’s just a party girl who likes spending her parent’s money. She spends her time sitting in cafes reading fashion magazines and hunting down vintage Prada. She likes night drives, sparkling Rosé  and wants a pet snake. There’s a pocket knife in her Petite Malle.”

she jus wrapped up her year abroad n her parents hav now forced her into an ivy league

she’s majoring in drama and theatre arts bc tbh she doesn’t know what she wants to do n she is naturally dramatic n extra so rly, it was a natural choice for her.  n rly her parents didn’t care what she took as long as she graduated under an ivy league 

she is the youngest of 5 siblings so basically she’s gotten a free pass w her older siblings being geared more towards runnin the business. aside from her mother parading her around like a trophy and practically whoring her out and praying she settles down with a CEO’S son.

10/10 sienna would sell her parents for a piece of gum but would go to war for her siblings.

queen of romanticizing everything sees everything through rose tinted glasses n prances around likes she’s in a wes anderson film

typically carries around a tiny vintage designer purse and is probably always that go-to brunch friend for all your needs. Hungover? she’s got advil. oh, you don’t like advil? she also has ibuprofen and tums. need a pick me up? she’s got three shades of red lipsticks. choose upon your liking!

literally is so shameless and ruthless and has little care in the world for other’s feelings except for her own and her siblings.

v childish n immature

has that effortless magnetic pull tht jus captivates ppl like.. she’s whimsical n is just..the kind of girl ppl would write songs abt??

dreamy and detached is a solid way to describe her

says sorry a lot but has never said/meant a genuine apology in her entire existence

not used to hearing the word no and jus finesse’s her way thru life like she’s in a perfume advert

okk that’s all i got.. thnx for prowlin thru this!! pls plot with me

[heejakewon-moved]

he really did!!! his pink hair is just *chef's kiss* his vocals are angelic. Will never get over him singing a little bit of anti romantic <3

why are you so precious ���🥺🥺🥺 she does really love the job but she's always wanted to be a florist and have her own business. <3 when her and my step dad finally move into their new home, she's quitting her job <3

no i totally get that. i sometimes miss being in the office working and seeing everyone. but it sounds like a massive pain tbh bc the only people in the office are people that cannot work from home. Either they have no Internet or it's impossible for them but every time someone tests positive, everyone gets sent home. They close the building down for 14 days but those people who can't work from home? They can't really do anything but sit around. Plus with the omicron, they straight up will not allow anyone into the office UNLESS you have a good enough reason to not work from home. So whether I like it or not, I'm working from home.

also!!!! i made my first gif!!!! i was like, screw it, im gonna download photoshop, it's like £7 a month or something (like 10 dollars?) so i watched a three year old tutorial on youtube, struggled massively, swore 927 times. the end result is just TERRIBLE but it's practice and i will keep practising :)))) took me two bloody hours to do though 😭😭😭 but hopefully, I can make your little jake gifset soon. probably in 2022 💖 i'm off work this friday so will do some more practice work then :)

ᓚᘏᗢ : NAAAAURR i've been thinking abt anti-romantic hee lately. honestly idk anymore if i bias hee more or jake HAHJHKAJHS heeseung's power is just- idk, makes me go 😭😌😵🤢🤩😭🥵😫🤪🥴🥰😎😨😖😝

stay safe !!! i hope omicron doesn't go wild like delta tho. i just wanna do some hands-on lab work bc at this point, there's no point studying at home. it makes me feel like if i graduate with this system, i won't even deserve to have a job jsdkjs all i did was read materials and i may understand them but it's still different when u finally get to do them ;-;

AND i saw ur gif!!!! you did great for a started tbh (also hshhds idk if it's just me but once you start making gifs/visual content, it's gonna be addicting lol. i was on writeblr too and when i started giffing i just....i never stopped. i dropped writeblr lmao.) my first gif was a freaking mess compared to your first gif. you have the talent!!! just a little practice but you'll continuously develop anw. i'm still figuring out coloring stuff. it's great to find tutorials too here on tumblr about giffing. they're really a big help!!!

[crunchta]

1-70 BINCH

Goddamn it sned

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Yeah? For the most part

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

My parents

03: Do you regret anything?

Yeah

04: Are you insecure?

Eh, yes ? Only abt a few things.

05: What is your relationship status?

Single

06: How do you want to die?

Either by a heart attack or stroke, or in a sword fight. Or by doing something badass

07: What did you last eat?

Bagels

08: Played any sports?

Soccer, basketball, horseback riding and I’ve been wanting to do track since the 8th grade

09: Do you bite your nails?

No

10: When was your last physical fight?

A couple days ago with my brother

11: Do you like someone?

No

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Nope

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

My parents always taught me that hate and love are very strong words and to use them only when you mean it. But no I don’t hate anyone

14: Do you miss someone?

Yeah. Friends and others.

15: Have any pets?

A cat! Named Diana, after Wonder Woman

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

I feel like I’m always slightly anxious or paranoid idk. But Im watching tv and taking science notes and I’m gonna make my Mom naan bread so I’m ok rn

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

Nope

18: Are you scared of spiders?

Fuck yes

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

Definitely

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

France

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

Yesterday I went horseback riding and went to the mall and today I have hw and am gonna make a lot of food lmao

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

I’m not sure. I honestly think I’d want a couple teenagers. Like I’d adopt kids. Maybe 2 at first. At most like 5. I’m not sure why that many. Maybe bc I don’t think it would be that hard or maybe bc I want to give lots of kids a home and share my wisdom

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

Just my ears are pierced

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Art, English, maybe history? At the moment I have an 88 or higher in all my classes.

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

Yeah

26: What are you craving right now?

Garlic naan bread, hot chocolate. Whipped cream. Strawberry’s. Grilled cheese.

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?I don’t think so

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

No.

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

Yeah

30: What’s irritating you right now?

The face that I need to study and am not and that I have one test and then I’m done with a class but I keep putting it off

31: Does somebody love you?

Yeah? I think?

32: What is your favourite color?Blue

33: Do you have trust issues?

I don’t think so

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

In my last dream I was trying to get high without my parents catching me and then i was in San Diego at a play with a few friends and I kept trying to find someone else and it was weird

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

I don’t remember. I try not to cry in front of people

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

Yeah. But when I stop then it’s bc I’m just done

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

I usually forgive but never forget and I can hold a grudge for a long time. It also depends on what happened. Give it a year I maybe be 80% over whatever happened depending on what it was

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

I mean it’s definitely in the top several. It’s okay so far

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

14?

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

If I have then I don’t remember lmaoo

51: Favourite food?

Steak, grilled vegetables Fries. Bacon. Bread rolls. Garlic naan bread. Banana bread. Pasta. Grilled cheese

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

I have such a hard time explaining how I see fate and destiny because I’m never sure what’s going to happen or how it’s going to or if whatever we did was right or if it leads to where we’re supposed to go or end up with it’s all v complicated

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

I looked up rain noises on Amazon music and put that on before I fell asleep

54: Is cheating ever okay?

No

55: Are you mean?

If Im mean it’s either in a kidding way or in a way where I’m trying mot to be vulnerable

56: How many people have you fist fought?

Just my brothers

57: Do you believe in true love?

I’d like to think that it exists

58: Favourite weather?Rain

59: Do you like the snow?

Yeah!!

60: Do you wanna get married?

Yeah one day

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

If a boy I like calls me baby, that’s a no but if a girl I like calls me baby I melt. It’s weird. Some friends call me babe and like with certain ppl that’s okay but not with others

62: What makes you happy?

Making ppl laugh. Making art.

63: Would you change your name?

Nah

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

Considering I don’t even remember who it was, yes.

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Jokes on you I don’t have a best friend of the opposite sex. I guess there’s Kai but he’s gay so I’d be like go make out with your bf and tell me if you still feel this way

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Nah

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

My little brother

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Zara

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

I believe in a form of soulmates

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

A couple ppl

[danisnotofire]

hey im going to orientation in a few days and im rly nervous abt starting college, i was just wondering if you had any tips or any ~advice~ bc im like, lowkey freaking out ((also i also stage manage and i love musicals and astronomy (sry i was snooping around your about page)))

hey!!! ok i am so so so sorry this took so long lol i actually just went back to school myself to help out with a pre-orientation program and we’ve been having like 17 hour days so i’m Exhausted and haven’t had a lot of time to really give a thoughtful answer (UNTIL NOW). some of this is gonna sound cheesy, but this is Emma Danisnotofire’s Official Real List of Pro-Tips for College, so if it’s on here it’s true. that being said, i go to a medium/small school (4,000 students) in the middle of fucking nowhere, so some of my experiences are gonna be a lil different. most still apply. 

first off, it’s TOTALLY OKAY that you’re nervous. i know when i went i was highkey freaking out even more bc everybody else seemed to be just excited and i felt like i was the only one actually losing my mind from how scared i was. i didn’t sleep at all the night before i moved in. being scared is fine. you’ll probably be scared for awhile after you get there, too, and that’s absolutely okay. i remember it took me a solid few weeks for me to stop feeling nauseous from nerves whenever i woke up. i promise i promise this will go away. you will settle in and you’ll make friends and you’ll figure out where everything is and how things work, i PROMISE. 

second, once you get there, don’t be afraid to talk to people!! i know that sounds super cheesy and unhelpful, but seriously. talk to your orientation leaders!! they’re usually upperclassmen and 99% of the time they had to APPLY to get that position, and it’s because they’re so so excited to meet you!! i’m a mentor for this pre-o program (it’s arts-focused), and we all had to apply, and every single other mentor is super passionate not only about the arts but about making sure the incoming freshman feel comfortable and happy and at home right off the bat. we want to like you!! talk to us!!! talk to each other!! at my school, (bucknell), orientation is actually pretty fucking legendary (it’s 5 straight days of just. nonstop activities), so getting to know your group is always nice. good conversation starters include: compliment something they’re wearing/have done, mention pets, ask about what classes they’re taking. that’s usually where i start when i’m talking to my kids!! 

okay, now for some Actual Tangible Advice. most of this is actually taken from when i gave my friend natalie some advice about college, but it’s still applicable to you!! i’m putting it under a readmore bc It’s So Very Long, I’m Sorry, I Really Hope This Helps/Makes Up For Me Not Answering For So Long

-if you can, get a microwave. if you can’t, it’s nbd because there’s probably one in your dorm somewhere. but it’s really nice not to have to put on shoes/socks to go make ramen at 3am

-INVEST IN GOOD SOCKS!!!! srsly omg you’re never gonna wanna go anywhere barefoot, and dorm heating/cooling can be tricky. i treated myself to a 5-pair box where they’re all different classic art pieces. they’re GORGEOUS and super nice for when i can’t find my flip-flops.

-also, if you have birks. bring them. they are also good for sliding on when u really have to pee in the middle of the night and can’t for the life of u find anything else. also everyone i know wears birks casually (i have a 20 dollar pair of fake ones from american eagle lol)

-OLD NAVY HAS FLIP FLOPS 2 FOR 5 DOLLARS. they make the BEST shower shoes and also they come in so many lit colors they’re the bomb digs. these are also good if you don’t have a pair of birks

-if your dorm doesn’t have it already (most dorms don’t) BUY A SCREEN FOR YOUR WINDOW!!!!!!! SERIOUSLY if u hate bugs you do NOT want them coming in when all u want is some fresh air. my roommate last year brought one to school bc i didn’t even think about it and it was a LIFESAVER.

-if you can, get one of those febreeze scent things you plug in. if you aren’t allowed, there’s this thing called a scentsy that basically melts wax and it makes your room smell SO. GOOD. idk how much they cost but honestly you will be thankful you have it if you can get it (candles work too but most dorms don’t allow candles)  

-you don’t need a huge plastic shower caddy!! you can get a softer one and then hang it on a hook outside the shower or loop it around the shower knob. they’re probs better than a big hard one bc they won’t fill up with water and you can stash it easier. (i went with a big plastic one and it’s a hassle lol). however, if you already got a big plastic one, that’s cool too bc sometimes they come with a removable second smaller caddy, and that’s good for putting your phone in outside of the shower to play music.

-lofting your bed is super nice bc it gives you a little more privacy from your roommate (and privacy is so so so rare in college, esp in a dorm). it’s also nice bc if you’re up there and a friend walks into your room (which is bound to happen with dorm living, which is where i’m assuming ur living as a first-year) they won’t immediately see you, which gives you a few seconds to get ur shit together before they see you.

-HOWEVER!! there are a few downsides to lofting ur bed. the major one is that it’s a pain in the ass to not only get up there, but also to lug your laptop/charger/snacks/etc up there, and once you’re up u probably aren’t gonna wanna come down. also, i don’t know if you drink, (which btw totally cool if you don’t!!), but there was definitely one time where i was too drunk to climb into my bed (i know, i know, several bad choices were made that night and i regret all of them), but thankfully my roommate last year was a fucking goddess though (a definite Mom Friend) and pulled all my sleeping stuff down to the floor lol. it’s rare that something like that happens, but it’s definitely something u wanna take into consideration.

-college is infinitely emotionally taxing. face masks and shower bath-bombs (you put them on the floor of your shower and they slowly dissolve and release whatever scent they are) do LOADS to make u feel better. face masks are also good bonding with friends!! 

-some other self-care college tips: cafes will usually have either hot apple cider in the fall, or you can get steamed milk with vanilla in it and it’s very soothing and gentle and calming. i got it a lot when i was sick just bc it was warm and not difficult to stomach. 

-also baking. if you get a few friends and bake something, it is 1) bound to be hilarious and 2) everyone who walks by will love you. we once made cinnamon buns, except instead of individual ones we made one big disgusting MegaBon, and we still talk about it to this day. it’s the name of our group chat lmaooo

-you can literally never have too much storage. plastic bins, crates, etc. never too much.

-you will leave college with so much more stuff than what you came with. holy shit. you will also get so many t-shirts??? see above. you’ll need storage.

-college is also the definition of ‘Everything is Happening All The Time’, and ur probably gonna make friends who try and do Everything. it took me super long to internalize the fact that it’s okay to like, say no to doing something and take a nap instead. not all the time, sometimes its good to force urself out of your room, but you can stay in on a saturday every once in a while! it doesn’t matter. 

-that being said, do try and go out of your comfort zone a little!! i was definitely not the type to do this in high school, but these days i’ll sometimes go to frat parties!! they’re actually really fun when you go with friends (and always go with friends!!!). it doesn’t even necessarily need to be parties either. audition for a capella. stage manage a show. do a club sport. there’s so much you can do!! (i actually didn’t follow my own advice here last year, i was too terrified to do a lot of things. i did theatre though, which ended up taking up most of my time anyway, but i still wish i had done more, hence why i’m doing this program right now! don’t be like first-year me. be better!)

-HOWEVER here are some (frat) party tips: girls can usually get into parties much easier than guys can, but either way don’t try to go out until around october/late september. the first few weeks back are for upperclassmen catching up with friends . go with a group, and STAY with your group. please. no girl left behind. they usually only serve shitty beer, and ofc you should keep your eyes on it the whole time. if you put it down, just go get another one instead of picking that one up again. also, invest in a shitty coat/gross pair of shoes specifically to wear to the frats. the floors are gross, and you’re probs gonna end up storing your jacket behind a trash can in the winter bc it’s too fucking hot inside the room to keep it on. (is this coat thing just a bucknell thing?? this might just be a bucknell thing). 

-more drinking/etc/stuff: know your rights. RAs are not allowed to look through drawers/open closets when doing room searches, so if you have wine or anything, make sure it’s hidden in somewhere they’re not allowed to touch.

-THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT: if someone has drank too much, BACKPACK THEM. get them into bed while wearing a filled up backpack. it prevents people from rolling over and choking on their vomit. i cannot emphasize how important it is for you to backpack someone. if you can, stay with them to make sure they’re okay. also, don’t be afraid to let them throw up before they go to bed. it helps. they’ll usually feel better. 

-if you can, get a job that lets you sit down. receptionist, librarian, etc. these are the best, bc sometimes you’ll get the  chance to study or get paid for doing nothing. also? receptionist looks SUPER good on a resume. also? money is nice.

-LOCK YOUR DOOR!!!!! I LEARNED THIS THE HARD WAY WHEN SOME WEIRD SENIOR BOY WALKED INTO MY ROOM DRUNK AT 3AM AND WOULDN’T LEAVE. also, you’ll make friends in the first week that you won’t necessarily want to be friends with later on, but they won’t get that message lol. again, lock your door (learned that the hard way, too)

-for future semesters, if you can’t get into a class right away it REALLY helps to email the professor!!! seriously, 9 times out of 10 they are more than happy to let an extra person in, because there are always students who drop the class within the first week or two. that’s how i got into astronomy my first semester, and i’m now a teacher’s assistant for it. so. really, it helps.

-the best way to be better friends with people is to just, get meals with them. honestly. make a group chat with some people and whenever ur getting dinner or lunch or whatever just throw out a ‘hey anyone wanna get food with me??’ text. 90% of the time someone will come with you.

-speaking of meals tho, ik this is the number 1 thing people tend to say, but it’s tRUE. nobody cares if you eat alone. it too me SO LONG to internalize this, but it’s totally fine to do!! it’s actually really nice sometimes, you can bring homework or your laptop and get some work done. it’s not even with meals, either! you can study alone! you can walk places alone! you can go to the gym alone! i was always terrified of being seen alone bc i thought people were gonna think i didn’t have friends or w/e dumb thing my anxiety had me feeling, (i still struggle with that lmao) but in reality you just look independent and cool!!! also, it helps to be content in the fact that you have friends and it doesn’t matter if people THINK you don’t.

-get a reusable water bottle. i got a plastic one for like 12 bucks, and i use it DAILY. if ur walking a lot, it helps keep you hydrated. also, it gives you something to do in class. also, you can personalize it with stickers and stuff (you can do the same with a laptop case). i p much take mine with me EVERYWHERE.

-this was also hard for me to internalize, but u gotta remember the fact that it’s okay not to be who u were in high school. like, i gave up some of the things i was into in high school in favor of some other things, and it took me awhile to figure out that i wasn’t like, betraying anyone, if that makes sense?? like, i started going to frat parties and actually having FUN at them??? (something i NEVER would have been into in high school, but here we are).

-also, grades are very different in college. i freaked out when i wasn’t getting a 4.0, because that’s who i was in high school, but then i kinda put it in perspective. i ended with a 3.67, which is still dean’s list. you’re not going to be perfect, bc chances are you ended up at a school with people on kinda equal intelligence levels as you. don’t freak out. 

okay that’s pretty much it!!! i can def come up with more stuff tailored to certain things/etc if you want me to talk more about this stuff!!! i love giving college advice and talking and helping people feel better about this whole thing bc i know it’s hard and scary

[the-fanaddict]

A lot of Questions (aka the-fanaddict procrastinates)

There were supposedly 92 questions, but the numbering was all screwed up and there are actually 85.

Tagged by @evilwriter37​! Thanks!

LAST:

1- Drink: Coke. I had dinner a while back  2- Last Phone Call: My mom 3- Text Message: My suitemate needed a picture of something 4- Song listened to: “A Leap of Faith” from the Minecraft Story Mode soundtrack.  5- Time you cried: I think some weeks back when thinking abt my future

HAVE YOU:

6- Dated someone twice: what is dating 7- Kissed someone and regretted it- again. not exactly a romantic 8- Been Cheated on: No   9- Lost someone special: Yes. quite a few people actually (either dead or moved away forever)  10- Been Depressed: *insert bruce banner meme* 11- Gotten Drunk and thrown up: I will never drink. Though I’ve seen my cousins drunk. what an experience. 

LIST THREE COLORS

12- Hot pink 13- Deep purple 14- Lapis Blue (still have episode 4 on my mind lol)

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15: Made New Friends- Senior year was the year I made a nice friend group 16: Fallen out of love: Nope 17- Laughed until you cried: Oh yes 18- Found out someone was talking about you: I don’t remember  19- Found out who your friends are: Not really. 20- Kissed someone on Facebook: um no.

GENERAL

21- How many of you facebook friends do you know in real life:  I mean they’re all my relatives so... 22: Do you have any pets: no

23: Do you want to change your name: Not really. 24: What did you do on ur last bday: House party with relatives.  25- What time do you wake up: 6:50 on weekdays and around noon on weekends 26: What were you doing at midnight last night: suffering bc homework 27- Name something you cant wait for: TROLLHUNTERS SEASON 2!!!!, HTTYD 3, mcsm episode 5, steven universe on FRIDAY, oh and Thanksgiving break.   28: When was the last time you saw you mom: a few hours back when I was facetiming her 29: What is one thing you could change: can I be a healthy weight/at least a little toned 30: What are you listening to right now: Minecraft Story Mode Soundtrack 31- Have you ever talked to someone named Tom: Yes. My brother’s friend is named Tom. 32: Something that is getting on your nerves: tungle in general lol 33: Most Visited Sites: Tumblr, Webassign, moodle, Youtube, and fanfiction 34: Moles: at least 3 on each arm, one on my finger, and one on my cheek 35: Marks: I have a burn mark from my trip to India last year and a scar on my knee from like 10 years ago falling off a scooter.  36: Childhood dream: to be an artist 37: Hair color: dark brown with natural auburn highlights (ayy same evilwriter)  38: Long or short hair: long 39: Do you have a crush on someone: Not really? I mean do find some people (celebrities) attractive, but a crush? 40: What do you like about yourself: My intelligence mostly 41: Peircings: Nope 42: Blood type: idk 43: Nicknames: none 44: Relationship Status: forever alone 45: Zodiac Sign: Gemini 46: Pronouns: She/Her 47: Favorite T.V Shows: Trollhunters, Steven Unvierse, Wild Kratts, Miraculous Ladybug, and Rtte I guess 48: Left or Right Handed: Right 49: Surgery: none 50: Hair dyed in a different color: nah 51: Sport: I don’t play sports 52: Vacation: I’ve been to India and the bahamas 53: Pair of trainers: Idk.

MORE GENERAL:

54: Eating: Our dining hall had an early thanksgiving dinner 55: Drinking: I mean I drink water so. 56: I’m about to: “study” for 2 tests tomorrow 57: Want: to sleep, not be stressed, and watch parks and rec 58: get Married: It’ll happen eventually i guess 59: Career: Half-dead college student. (same fam) 60: hugs or kisses: Hugs 61: Lips or Eyes: Eyes 62: Short or tall: 5′2′’ 63: Older or younger: 5 years Older than my brother  64: Nice arms or stomach: None. I am a noodle 65: sensitive or loud: Sensitive. I will cry so easily.  66- Hook up or relationship: Relationship bc I will probably get attached easily.  67: Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant. my brother’s the troublemaker

HAVE U EVER

68- Kissed a stranger: no 69- Drank hard liquor: hellNo 70: Lost Glasses/Contact Lenses: I don’t wear glasses 71: Turned someone down: I dont even date so

PERSONAL

72: Sex on the first date: No. I need to know them better first! 73: Broken someone’s heart: Nope. 74- Had your heart broken: platonically? yes. My best friend moved away.  75- Have been Arrested: no 76: Cried when someone died: Oh yes. Both in real life and fictional 77: Fallen for a friend: Conflicted abt it tbh

DO U BELIEVE-

78: Yourself: I mean...yeah but at the same time trust nobody not even yourself 79: Miracles: depends. 80: Love at first sight: more like attracted at first sight. 81: Santa Claus: not really 82- Kiss on the first date: no. need to know them better first. 

MORE:

83- Current Best Friend: my best friend may have moved away but we still keep in touch (shoutout to my girl Anji)  84- Eye Color: Dark brown, though it’s more hazelly in sunlight. 85- Fav Movie: How to Train Your Dragon no question

[partiallystcrs]

ANYWAY HERE’S A HEADCANON DUMP FOR ESTHER & GRAFFITI PETE i may also do another one of these for some other muses later, but these rn are for @chronolockcd ( thank u for helping distract me !! )

esther ;  - okay but like pls imagine a younger esther, trying to be a noble person, taking every task given to her very seriously, studying every code presented into the wee hours of morning, & reading every book she can get her hand on .  - pls imagine esther going above & beyond to prove herself useful to this organization that kidnapped her as a child & has basically raised her - now imagine her reaction to learning that they killed her parents for the fortune they left to her & feeling betrayed by everyone  - now imagine her being closed off to most of her previous associates until a mr. jacques snicket comes along & definitely does not fall in love with her, but she falls in love with him & he definitely does steal her fortune for vfd & thus Ruins esther - NOW PLS FOR A MOMENT CONSIDER W ME HOW HIGH ESTHER BELIEVES HER STANDARDS ARE BC SHE “ NO LONGER HAS ANY FEELINGS “ FOR JAQ & HOW SHE DOES NOT ENDANGER CHILDREN OR ORPHAN THEM but she did marry a man for his fortune & kill him a month into the marriage.  - she totally would take jaq back if he asked tho bc really her standards aren’t that high at all  - the bar of her standards is actually on the ground  - also her biggest form of revenge on beatrice baudelaire would be to raise her children & tell them all of the Truth(TM)

graffiti pete ;  - BI AS FUCK  - also his dad was v neglectful in raising this poor boy - honestly daniela probably raised him like she made sure he had food & lowkey gave him crayons & chalk to let him draw & color - so when his dad kicks him out for catching him w a guy, & after he comes back from his little ‘ trip ‘ down the coast, daniela invites him to live w her but he has to pay rent  - unfortunately that means he can’t ever bring sonny home for cuddles or even dinner bc he knows how much dani likes to Talk  - SINCE IM NOT SURE IF IT’S CANONICALLY ADDRESSED ANYWHERE my hc is that he did a commission for someone down in south carolina but they didn’t have the money for it, so he asked for the boombox w the intention of selling it.  - obvi he kept it bc he loves that it’s such a Look & honestly u can’t pry it out of his cold dead hands - even though he keeps things w sonny pg bc he loves him & doesn’t wanna get thrown in jail, he definitely likes to mess w usnavi & will untuck his shirt & get paint where it shouldn’t be jsut to fre ak him out  - he pays for every single one of his slushies like even if sonny gives it to him for free , he leaves some change on the counter - PEANUT ALLERGY  - LIKE SO BAD ,,,, LIKE ONCE HE ATE A PEANUT M&M WITHOUT KNOWING THE CONSEQUENCE & HE ALMOST DIED - on that note he almost attempted suicide by m&m bc he was so grumpy one day & just wanted to have a whole pack just to say he had some but usnavi actually smacked him with a newspaper so it’s all good - VERY INSECURE ABT EVERYTHING  - like fr when ppl say they like his art his reaction is ‘ thank u i kinda hate it but hey if u like it then i’ll keep it ‘ - but really is never satisfied w his art - or himself for that matter but he can hide it well - PARKOUR  - both emotional & physical  - RIPPED AF  - but like he doesn’t even try it’s all from trying to escape the cops lma o  - rebellious but he has a good heart & would just love to see the world happy & painted - HE CAN ACTUALLY DO PRETTY NICE ART ON A CANVAS but he never does bc he thinks it will ruin how ppl look @ him . he doesn’t mind being the ‘ punk ’ kid tbh  - once tho sonny says he liked a sunset & thus put pete in a panic bc he needed to go buy oil paints & a canvas to paint a sunSET FOR HIM  - he also secretl y admires tf out of usnavi & benny even if he cannot impress them in the least. 

[gnostalgist]

🌻rules: once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, choose 25 people to tag.

I was tagged by @fixationpsychosis ! (thank u!)

🌻LAST…


[1] drink: zero ultra monster energy fsdjlfkjds (its the only Good(TM) monster so i had to specify)


[2] phone call: my grandma probably. if skype calls count, then dirk.


[3] text message: my grandma...


[4] song you listened to: ok it was the schuyler sisters from hamilton but it was bc i was doign a colorguard routine to it which probably doesnt help but

[5] time you cried: idk... a couple days ago

🌻 HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: yeah


[7] been cheated on: uh you know what? probably, yeah.


[8] kissed someone and regretted it: not immediately??? but yeah


[9] lost someone special: yeah i mean.. i hope its not permanent but yeah


[10] been depressed: all day erryday


[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: nah

🌻 LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS…


[12] pastel pink


[13] the one shade of red u know. like my blog aesthetic


[14] orange but its gotta be soft

🌻 IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…


[15] made new friends: yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i made so many new good friends somewhat recently!! i love them!!!


[16] fallen out of love: im trying

[17] laughed until you cried: yeah


[18] found out someone was talking about you: hhhh yeah

[19] met someone who changed you: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


[20] found out who your true friends are: hh yeah


[21] kissed someone on your Facebook list: ive only kissed two people ever and theyre both BLOCKED AS FUCK

🌻 GENERAL…


[22] how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: (sidenote: i dont like the term “real life” when talking abt friends bc just bc u have ldrs doesnt mean u dont know the person in ‘real life’ bc u do. but i know what its asking so im just gonna answer that) 3... because i panicked and deleted almost everyone off my friends list


[23] do you have any pets: i have a cat named Pico de Gato

[24] do you want to change your name: legally? yeah. but idk im ok w my name(s) rn


[25] what did you do for your last birthday: hhhhh I CRIED BC NOBODY WAS ABLE TO HANG OUT AND I SAT IN MY ROOM ALONE but then the other day my friend brought me weed as a belated bday present so whatever

[26] what time did you wake up: 6 am


[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: sleepin

[28] name something you cannot wait for: GREEN DAY AND AGAINST ME CONCERT NEXT MONTH!


[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: oh god last summer i think im not sure


[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: not having bpd and ruining all of my relationships

[31] what are you listening to right now: against me bc i remembered the concert for #28...

[32] have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i went to middle school w someone named tom and i had him in social studies and he wrote a song for a class project on guitar except it was really bad 


[33] something that is getting on your nerves: this one kid i kind of know thats.. actualyl terrible i want them to die....


[34] most visited website: tumblr/youtube 


[35] elementary: idk what these are actually asking but i... think its asking where... i started to kindergarten at a school in south dakota, and then a different school here from then until 2nd grade; 3rd grade in texas; 4th in rochester, minnesota and 5th in winona, minnesota


[36] high school: currently in rn and it sux


[37] college: either going to a technical school here to get a degree as a diagnostic medical sonographer or going somewhere??? to get a phd in psych to be a clinical psychologist. prolly the former tho,,

[38] hair colour: black but rly badly dyed


[39] long or short hair: idk its like to my shoulders when its down but also i have a mohawk


[40] do you have a crush on someone: YEA IM RLY GAY FOR MY BF

[41] what do you like about yourself: my eyes and Musical Abilities(TM)


[42] piercings: idk i dont really want any,,


[43] blood type: idk ??
??????????????

[44] nickname: roxy (if that counts..), kasp, rox, friendly ghost


[45] relationship status: IM LVOE DIRK


[46] zodiac sign: picses/aries


[47] pronouns: god i dont fucking know.. any?? except if we’re not close u cant use she/her but. yeah idk. any.


[48] fav TV show: hm twd probably


[49] tattoos: i dont have any, BUT
 im going to get a bike helmet? idk where yet though. and then just those plastic vampire teeth, and finally, the Most Important one, the word ‘drown’ in morse code on the inside of my left arm. im gonna?? try to meet tyler joseph and have him write it for me.

[50] right or left handed: right

🌻 FIRST…


[51] surgery: i had surgery on my tongue in like 1st/2nd grade bc i couldnt like. lift it up


[52] piercing: none


[53] best friend: a girl named zaneb

 
[54] sport: uhhh i tried to do bmx for a while but ive never been in a sport rly until now if u count colorguard


[55] vacation: hm my familys always been poor so like. we’ve only gone to texas and south dakota to see family


[56] pair of trainers: wh.. what

🌻 RIGHT NOW…


[57] eating: nothing but i just ate a cookie i baked. also i know this isnt what it asked but i just want to say ive ate 7 tacos in the past 3 day.


[58] drinking: ALRIGHT i started writing this post like 4 hours ago but im still drinking that monster


[59] I’m about to: nut

[60] listening to: against me


[61] waiting for: dirk to come online?????


[62] want: dirk to come online?????


[63] get married: probably not..


[64] career?: diagnostic medical sonography or clinical psychologist

🌻 WHICH IS BETTER…


[65] hugs or kisses: hugs... kissing is honestly disgusting and ngl like 95% of the time ive kissed anyone i just found it Gross dskfjds;ld


[66] lips or eyes: eyes.....


[67] shorter or taller: ok i dont actually care either way but listen. dallon weekes is 6′4′’ and he can W R E C K  M E


[68] older or younger: i dont care but i usually just happen to like ppl older than me? but not by much like a year at most


[69] romantic or spontaneous: both


[70] nice arms or nice stomach: idc s’all cute


[71] sensitive or loud: idk both but at different times??

[72] hook up or relationship: relationship...


[73] troublemaker or hesitant: idk..

🌻 HAVE YOU EVER…


[74] kissed a stranger: god no. i tried once when i was 12


[75] drank hard liquor: yeah but i was depressed and we dont talk about that period of my life

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses: i dont.. wear them.

[77] turned someone down: i dont think so... nobody is interested in me ever lmao

[78] sex on first date: GROSS


[79] broken someone’s heart: i dont think so


[80] had your own heart broken: yeah

[81] been arrested: ....listen


[82] cried when someone died: no


[83] fallen for a friend: hm i dont think so. unless u count dirk but i had a crush on him like immediately

🌻 DO YOU BELIEVE IN…


[84] yourself: every other wednesday


[85] miracles: eh

[86] love at first sight: no but i think u can kinda have a connection at first sight. like a “i know im going to love you” at first sight.

[87] santa claus: yeah ofc


[88] kiss on the first date: hh it depends idk


[89] angels: i am an angel so like

🌻 OTHER…


[90] current best friend’s name: i never have like actual best friends bc nobody likes me but idk ill go out on a limb and say martin


[91] eye colour: blue


[92] favourite movie: the labyrinth or heathers or little shop of horrors. or book of mormon if we pretend thats a movie

im too lazy to tag people i am SORRY if u wanna do this then say i tagged u tho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

[cryptic-clairvoyant]

@homosocials tagged me in this! love u <33

rules: tag 20 followers you want to get to know better (not going to tbh)

gender + sexual orientation: gay boy!! i mean if u wanna get technical im nb but like,,, im a boy

star sign: scorpio!! i usually fit it v well but like,, y do the zodiac posts always talk abt sex so much like,, scorpios r more than sex!! it honestly matters v little but it bothers me nonetheless rip

height: 5′6 im smol

hogwarts house: slytherin! true house pride w my green hair <33 

favorite color: oh boy either green or yellow!! probably yellow but i also rly love green

favorite animal: snow leopards!! i love em 

average hours of sleep: oh boy um,, probably six? six-nine depending on how i feel but i usually go for as little as possible tbh

favorite fictional character: hmm idk!! i usually answer hanschen so i guess i’ll go with him but rn im not rly super focused on anything fiction (besides falsettos which has marvin who i also rly love)

number of blankets i sleep with: usually one + the heater turned up rly high lmao

favorite singer/band: ohhh boy i rly like broadway stuff mostly tbh!! i like real friends a lot tho. + the emo trinity bc im forever stuck in 2006. honestly if im not listening to falsettos or sa im probably listening to some emo middle school music im a Mess

dream trip: japan!! i wanna teach there rly badly but tht doesnt count as a trip i guess so,,, maybe rome!! rome is so cool i was actually talking to someone abt tht not tht long ago if ur reading this hello!

dream job: i wanna teach in foreign countries + be an elementary teacher or tesl teacher here but like,, i guess if i was going to like follow some impossible dream id be like,, on broadway or something or!! study dying languages and try to preserve them!!

when was this blog created: oh boy its been awhile. like 2013?? i made my first blog when i was probably like 12 tho,,, maybe 11 idk but i dont use it anymore it was a simblr rip

current # of followers: 372! i am,, not very popular lmao but thts ok i have some v good followers + mutuals!! ily all v much <3333

what made you decide to make a tumblr: i was on a sims forum and everyone was sharing their simblrs and i was like,,, hmm i should make one!! tht blog was deleted tho and now someone new has the url rip :/// i would never use it anyway tho it has my birthname in it

ok instead of tagging ppl im going to like,,, not,,,, bc im actually abt to leave i have some stuff to do + then am going to see alex so!! <33