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writing-and-wondering · 2 years

Text

Scared to Love you - I

Pairing: Hangman x Reader

Warnings: Passing out, Swearing

Request: yes! by a lovely anon, find it here

Word Count: 7.9k

Synopsis: Due to some grueling training and the extreme heat, you find yourself passing out from heat exhaustion. Luckily, Hangman is there to catch you.

A/n: first Hangman fic lets goooo ! love this guy and it was such a pleasure writing for him :)

GIF by @unicornships

You lean your head back against the leather couch, noting with a groan how the fan above you is doing little to alleviate the heat sticking to your skin. Though it’s on full blast and shaking so much you think it might fly off the ceiling, it feels as though it’s doing absolutely nothing.

From beside you, Fanboy lets out a gasp as he refreshes the weather app for the twelfth time.

“Please tell me that it isn’t hotter from the last time you checked.” You mutter, reaching up to wipe the sheen of sweat off your forehead as you glance over at him.

Fanboy makes a face, his mouth opening as he goes to speak but is interrupted as Hangman walks over, “Hate to break it to you, but it did in fact just got hotter. Now that I’m here, that is.” He says with a grin, taking a seat on the other couch.

You glare at him, “You’re insufferable. Especially now.”

All he does is wink at you and despite how much you’re already sweating, you hate how heat rises to your face from the simple action. Damn him, you think as you let your head fall back against the leather.

“How hot is it really, though?” Hangman asks, leaning forward as Fanboy tilts his phone towards him, “Holy shit.”

You open your eyes and stare at the ceiling, “Do I even want to know the temperature?”

“If you want to be able to prepare yourself for when you’re up for training.” Fanboy responds. Suppressing another groan, you unstick yourself from the couch and lean forward so that you’re arms are resting atop your knees, “Just tell me.”

“117 degrees.”

“Fuck me.” You sigh, your head dropping into your hands.

“Well, only if you let me take you out to dinner first.” Hangman says, and you can hear the smug grin in his voice. Not even bothering to look at him, you let your hand do the talking as you flip him the bird.

Fanboy laughs at the exchange, “Wow, the tension here is making me sweat.”

“Dude, you’re literally already glistening.” Hangman states.

“You’re no better, my guy.” Payback says as he plops down next to Hangman, his flight suit tied around his waist in an attempt to not over heat. You hear more footsteps and look up as the others walk in, having just finished their time in the air for the day.

Eyeing Rooster, you sit up a little as he approaches, “How is it out there?” You ask as he practically collapses onto the bar stool across from you. He just shakes his head, unzipping his flight suit, “It’s so hot and humid out there it feels like we’re walking through Satan’s ass.”

“Ew, man, what the hell.” Payback groans.

Rooster just shrugs, “It’s true. You’ll see, they’re calling the next teams up in a minute.”

“Lord help me. I’m going to melt out there.” You say, shoving your flight suit off your shoulders, “God, the AC in here sucks.”

“You’d think it’d be better since it’s like, the military. But, no. No, they hate us.” Fanboy mutters as he drains the last of his water.

Hangman chuckles, “Considering how much they need us they really to like to see us suffer.”

You nod along as he speaks, the uncomfortable feeling of sweat rolling down your back making you antsy, “But come on, they couldn’t spare a little on some decent air conditioning? I mean, my apartment has better AC than this and it’s from the fucking 1800′s.”

The others make grunts of agreement, the heat seemingly melting their brains to form any other type of response. What you would give right now to get an ice bath.

Looking over, you almost leap out of your seat as you see Phoenix and Bob return, arms full of bottles of water, “Your saviors are here!” Phoenix says as she hands out the water.

“You’re an angel, Phe.” You say as you catch the bottle she tosses to you, the condensation from the cold water breathing some life back into you. You drain the water in less than a minute, the coolness spreading through you and leaving you gasping for air as you bring the empty bottle back down.

The room falls into silence, save for the crinkling of water bottles, as the others do the same. “I’m going to need like seven more of these little blue bitches.” Payback says as he finishes off his drink, his fingers running along the wrapper as he draws on the condensation.

“Be my guest to go find more.” Phoenix tells him, “I swear we had to go clear to the other side of the base for some cold ones. Everyone’s clearing them out like it’s the damn apocalypse.”

“May as well be. It feels like the world’s on fire.” Bob admits, holding his now half full bottle against the back of his neck. Watching him do it, you wish you had held off enough water to be able to do the same. But you didn’t, and now you’re just sitting here sticking to the leather sofa in the unyielding heat.

The room falls into silence once more, until the admiral walks into the room, waving his hand to keep you all from standing at attention. You look over as he addresses you, “Alright, next team to go up will be Hangman, Artemis, and Phoenix and Bob. Get your gear on and head out there, even though it’s hotter than hell.” And with that he walks out of the room, using his clipboard to fan himself.

You groan at the idea of moving, the heat weighing down your limbs. Rubbing at your eyes, you’re just about to get up when you notice Hangman offering his hand to you. Raising your eyebrow at him, he just smiles in response, “You seem like you could use some help.”

If your face wasn’t already so red from how hot you were, you would’ve been embarrassed at how fast the heat rose to your cheeks. But in this moment you couldn’t find it in you to care as you took Hangman’s hand and accepted his help in quite literally unsticking you from the couch.

Now standing, you're close enough to him to smell his cologne that somehow masks any scent of sweat. You feel him squeeze your hand before letting go, another simple wink from him leaving you stunned.

“Alright, Artemis. Let’s go- as Rooster said- have some fun in Satan’s ass.” Hangman laughs at himself before walking towards the door.

“That still sounds nasty, man.” Payback calls after him. Shaking your head, you pat Payback’s shoulder as you pass, “At least you don’t have to fly with him.” You say.

“Ooh. I wish you luck.” He tells you, to which you wave your hand at him without turning around, “Thanks. I’ll need it.”

Once in the locker room, you splash cold water on your face and neck before going to get the rest of your gear on. Phoenix shares your look of discomfort as the two of you get ready.

“Great, more layers. Just what I wanted.” You mutter, sweat already rolling down your neck again. Phoenix nods in agreement, “Let’s just get through this and then before we know it we’ll all be drinking ice cold beers at the Hard Deck.”

“Oh, don’t tempt me with a good time.” You say with a grin, thankful to Phoenix for being able to bring light to the situation.

She shifts her vest on, “I swear, the minute I get a drink I’m going into the ocean with it, I don’t even care.”

You lean your head against the lockers, “God, that sounds so good right now. I would literally fly into the ocean if it meant being able to cool off.”

Phoenix laughs and then fixes you with a pair of squinted eyes, “Don’t actually do that though.”

Raising your eyebrows at her, you shrug, “Why not? I’ve done it before.”

As the two of you walk out of the locker room she gapes at you, “Huh?”

You can’t help but laugh at her expression, “Oh, don’t tell me that you’ve never heard this story before.”

“Heard what story?” The two of you look over as Hangman joins you, followed by Bob. Phoenix gives her WSO a fist bump before answering, “The story of when Artemis apparently flew into the ocean.”

“What?” Bob sputters, his eyes wide. You roll your eyes at his and Hangman’s shocked expression as the four of you make your way to the tarmac, “Well, crashed into the ocean. But yeah, it was a couple of years ago and honestly wouldn’t mind doing it again today.”

Bob nudges your arm, “Please don’t. That look of yours makes me unsure on if you’re serious or not.”

You simply pat his shoulder as you smile at him, “Well, we’ll just have to find out now won’t we?”

As you push open the doors, you’re immediately hit with the thick air that takes the breath out of your lungs for a moment. Slipping on your aviators, you find that they do little to stop the blazing sun from making it feel like your eyeballs are about to melt out of your head.

“This is disgusting.” You say, pulling at your collar as you make your way to your jet. Hangman reaches over and squeezes your shoulder, “Good thing you’re here then to make it all better.” He says to you.

You stop next to your jet and fix him with a stare, the way he said it making your heart flutter, “Was that sarcasm? Are you joking with me right now, Seresin?”

He doesn’t answer, but there he goes again with winking at you and making your stomach do front flips. Hangman gives you a little wave as he smiles, “How about we give everyone a show, huh?”

You roll your eyes, but a smile still finds its way onto your face, “Lead the way, Hangman.”

“Aye! Stop eye-fucking and get in your jets so we can get this over with!” Phoenix yells over to you both from where she’s already sitting in her own jet.

You and Hangman share a look, the two of you barely suppressing your laughter as you smile at each other. He gives you a fist bump before jogging over to his jet and climbing in, you doing the same.

Upon getting set up and closing your canopy, the air feels a little more stuffy but the familiar hum of the engine takes away from your discomfort. Though you would much rather be swimming somewhere in the ice cold water, nothing can ever diminish how much you truly love flying.

Glancing over as Hangman starts moving his jet towards the take off point, you realize that it isn’t just your love for the sky that is easing your troubles.

Whipping your jet around, you feel your stomach flip as you come back from being inverted, the sun seemingly spinning around you as you right yourself. Gripping onto the lever, you pull back just as you complete the maneuver that you all had been tirelessly working to perfect.

“WHOOO!!! That’s how it’s done!” Hangman cheers as he brings his jet up next to yours. You look over and see him positively beaming at you and you’re sure your heart is about to jump out of your chest. After unclipping your mask, you smile back at him and knock on the canopy with your fist, “That was awesome!”

He throws his head back in laughter, the sound of it like honey to your ears. Shaking your head a little from where your mind was drifting to, you look over to the left at Phoenix as she speaks, “I’m pretty sure we beat our own record with that. It was literally perfect.”

“Of course it was, I’m team leader.” Hangman says, his voice dripping with confidence.

“Barely. Pretty sure Artemis did more leading than you, Bagman.” Bob cuts in, though his tone is one you recognize to be joking. Chuckling at his comment, you look over to Hangman only to see him staring in Bob’s direction with his mouth open in shock.

“Low blow, Bob.” He mutters, his eyes squinting toward the man.

You look back to the left and see Bob shrugging, “I only speak the truth.”

“Alright kids, let’s head back. I’m in desperate need of a cold shower.” Phoenix says as she turns her jet to the side and heads back to the ground. You follow, “Aren’t we all.”

As you descend, the adrenaline from the successful maneuver begins wearing off, leaving your mind a little hazy. You can hear the muffled voices of the others speaking, but all you find yourself focusing on is how hard it is to catch your breath all of a sudden.

You shake your head, blinking rapidly as the tarmac comes into view. You’re following Phoenix’s jet and reach up to rub your eyes when suddenly there’s two of her. Taking a deep breath, you tightly grip the lever as you line your jet up for landing.

There’s a muffled voice in your ear and it takes a little too much for you to simply respond, “What?” Though you're not entirely sure who was speaking.

“You’re looking a little low there, Artemis.” Hangman’s voice comes across to you, “Pull up a bit. There you go.” His words bring the smallest amount of focus back to you, just enough so that you’re able to successfully land without any issues.

As your jet rolls to a stop, your hands fall away from the controls and you lean back against your seat, breathing hard. Shaking your head again, your wipe the sweat from your eyes before opening the canopy.

You’re vaguely aware of it moving as you stare ahead, a loud ringing in your ears. Your body doesn’t feel like it's your own as you lift yourself out of the jet and climb down the ladder, your hands shaking slightly.

Once your feet are back on the ground, you find yourself unable to let go of the metal rungs as you star at the tarmac beneath your boots. Blinking hard, you squeeze your eyes shut as your head spins.

A gentle hand on your shoulder brings you to open your eyes again, looking to the side to find who the hand belongs to. In staring at them, you can see that their lips are moving but you hear nothing.

The ringing in your ears grows as you fumble with the strap on your helmet before clumsily taking it off, barely feeling it leave your grasp as it tumbles to the ground. You stare up at the man talking to you, “What?” You ask, your voice coming out weak and distant.

You barely catch the way Hangman’s expression creases in concern, his other hand coming up to cup the side of your face, “You with me, Artemis?” He sounds as though he’s underwater as he speaks, leaving you feeling very confused as you’re certain that you aren’t underwater. Right?

Taking a deep breath, or at least trying to, your hand drops from the metal rungs of the ladder in favor of gripping onto Hangman’s wrist, “Why are you so quiet?” You ask, looking at him with squinted eyes as the sun burns down on you.

He shakes his head, his eyebrows drawn together, “I’m not- are you okay?”

You nod, blinking hard as you step away from his hold, “Yeah. ‘M fine.” You answer him, feeling as though you’re trudging through mud as you force your feet to move forward. Reaching up, you hold your hand above your eyes in an attempt to block the sun.

Hangman’s voice drifts over to you but the ringing in your ears keeps you from fully hearing him. A part of you plans to just ignore him in favor of focusing on walking forward, but you think better of it and turn to face him.

As you do, your vision blurs as the world tilts sideways. You stagger to the side just before finding yourself on your knees. You’re left staring down at the tarmac, confused for just a moment before gentle hands find their way to your arms.

Looking up, you lose all feeling in your body just as you fall backwards. All you can see is Hangman’s panicked face in front of you as your world fades to black.

Hangman is still jittery from the team’s success in the sky as he practically jumps out of his jet. He waves at Phoenix and Bob, who wave back before turning to finish up their final checks. Despite the heat, Hangman swears he has never felt better.

There’s just something about things going perfectly that fill him with a type of joy that reminds him of just how much he loves what he does. Ducking under the nose of his jet, Hangman smiles as he catches sight of you descending your ladder.

“Artemis!” He calls, his hand waving over to you. His smile drops ever so slightly when you don’t respond. As he walks closer, he watches as you stop at the base of your ladder, still gripping tightly to the rungs.

His pace quickens and all traces of his smile are gone as he jogs up to you, his hand coming up to rest on your arm, “Hey, you okay?”

Your lack of response fills him with the beginnings of panic, and just a little bit of hurt. His first thought is of you just ignoring him, but upon bending down a bit to get a better look at your face, he throws that thought out the window.

He should’ve known something was wrong when you started to get a little unsteady during your landing. Gripping your arm a little tighter, Hangman tries again, “Artemis?”

The relief he feels when you finally look at him in unmeasurable. Though, as he meets your eyes and sees how unfocused they are, that relief is overthrown by his growing panic.

“What?” You ask him, your voice not nearly as strong as it usually is. Hangman feels his throat tighten as he reaches up to hold the side of your face, just to keep you looking at him, “You with me, Artemis?”

His heart rate quickens as you let go of the ladder and hold onto his wrist, your grip barely there, “Why are you so quiet?” You ask. Hangman blinks at you, his hold on your arm tightening once more, “I’m not- are you okay?”

Though he hates to, he allows you to shrug him off as you nod, “Yeah. ‘M fine.” Hangman watches as you turn away from him, but he leaves his hands still outstretched towards you. He isn’t quite sure what’s going on with you, but not one part of him likes it.

The second he sees your feet misstep he’s following close behind you, “Artemis, I don’t think you’re okay.” Hangman cringes at the way his voice wavers ever so slightly. He’s reaching out to you again as you turn to face him, your mouth open as if you’re about to say something.

But it never comes, for you stumble to the side and fall to your knees before Hangman can even breathe. The sight of you falling sends him into overdrive and he’s by your side in under a second, his hands holding onto your arms.

“Artemis?” He asks, his voice filled with panic as you blearily look up at him before your eyes roll into the back of your head. Hangman hardly has time to react as you go limp in his hold, your head jerking backwards as you fall. He stumbles and skids his knees on the tarmac as he catches your head.

Brining your body close to him, Hangman pushes the hair that was stuck to your cheek back, “Hey, hey- Artemis? Artemis?” He asks, his voice growing with panic as your body jerks a little.

“Shit, shit-” Hangman doesn’t know what to do as he looks up, his eyes frantically searching around for help. He lands on Phoenix and Bob, who have their backs turned.

“Hey! Hey- get help! We need help!” Hangman yells, causing both pilots to whip around. Upon seeing your collapsed form in Hangman’s arms, Bob takes off running to get the medics as Phoenix hurries over to you.

“What- what happened?” She asks, kneeling down beside you as she grabs your wrist. Hangman shakes his head as he watches her check your pulse, “I don’t- I don’t know! She was out of it a-and then she just-” His breath catches in his throat as he looks down at you.

All of the color was gone from your face and your eyelids were fluttering violently. Phoenix grips onto Hangman’s arms, which brings his attention back to her, “We need to get her inside- now.”

Hangman is nodding and lifting you up before she’s even finished speaking. The way your body just falls against him pulls at his heart in a way that makes it hard to breathe.

Phoenix runs ahead of him and holds open the door. Hangman watches your head as he rushes through the doorway, frantically searching for help. Before he’s even a couple of steps into the building, he almost collides with Bob as the man comes sprinting around the corner.

“Medics!” Bob exclaims, his eyes wide, “I got the-” He cuts himself off as he steps out of the way of the nurses, his hands motioning towards the stretcher they’re pushing.

Barely processing what’s happening, Hangman rushes forward and gently places you onto the bed, barely daring to even breathe as he catches your hand and grips onto it before it drops over the side.

The nurses begin rolling the bed through the halls, Phoenix and Bob running ahead of them to open doors as they move towards the med wing. The whole way Hangman is by your side, his eyes not leaving you as he holds onto your hand so tightly he loses feeling in his own.

Just as they reach the med wing, a gentle hand on his chest stops him. Your hand is pulled out of his grasp as they push the bed away, just for you to disappear out of his view as the doors close.

“I- I have to-” Hangman starts but the nurse in front of him gently grabs onto his forearm. She gives him an understanding look, “We’ve got her from here, Lieutenant. You’re welcome to stay out here until she’s steady again, okay?”

Hangman blinks at the nurse, her words coming across muffled to him. After a minute though it clicks, and all he can do is nod. She offers him a smile, “We’ll let you know as soon as we can.” And with that she walks to the doors that you had just passed through moments before.

He stands there for a minute, staring at the doors as they swing closed. Glancing down, he finds that his hands are trembling. Shaking his head, he reaches up and runs them over his face as he takes in a deep breath.

“Hangman?” Phoenix’s soft voice pulls his attention away from the doors. Looking at her and Bob, he finds that for once he doesn’t have it in him to say anything.

Without speaking, Phoenix leads him over to the chairs, understanding in her eyes. As he sits down, Hangman’s eyes lock onto a broken floor tile and his gaze stays glued to it as Phoenix reassures him that everything will be fine.

He knows they’re both talking to him, but he has no idea what they’re saying. All he can focus on is how he had watched the color drain from your face and barely caught you before your head hit the ground. Gripping onto the armrests of the chair, Hangman blinks hard as he feels the sting of hot tears.

“Get some rest, okay?” Is what he finally catches from Phoenix before her and Bob make their leave. He just nods at them before leaning forward and dropping his head into his hands.

Hangman’s eyes are closed when he hears the sound of footsteps approaching. He looks up as they stop in front of him, and he offers the smallest smile when he sees Phoenix. She smiles back before motioning to the seat next to him, “May I?”

“Please.” He nods, folding his arms across his body.

Phoenix lets out a sigh, “How are you doing?”

Hangman shrugs, “Fine.”

She doesn’t look convinced but doesn’t push it. Instead, she looks him over, “Did you shower?”

Nodding, Hangman runs a hand through his hair, “Yeah. Rooster came and got me to take one with him.”

He glances over and sees Phoenix’s expression buffer for a second, “You... showered with Rooster?”

“Yeah.” Hangman says before his brain finally catches up, “Wait- no. No, no. We didn’t- I didn’t shower with him. I just- He came and got me but we didn’t-”

“I know.” Phoenix chuckles, “I figured.”

Letting his head fall against the wall, he lets out a breath of laugh, “Oh, you are an ass.”

She just grins at him, “Did you eat?” She asks, changing the subject. He raises an eyebrow at her, “Yeah, before we went up in the air, remember?”

“The last time you ate was before the training session?” Phoenix asks, the sudden concern in her voice causing Hangman to fix her with a confused look, “...Yeah? It was only a couple of hours ago.”

“Jake, that was seven hours ago.” She states.

Hangman’s mouth goes dry, “Wha- seven?” There’s no way it had already been that long. He had been sitting here in the waiting room this entire time, save for the ten minutes he allowed himself to step away for a shower.

Shaking her head in disbelief, Phoenix reached over and dropped something in Hangman’s lap. Looking down, he saw that it was a bottle of water and a sandwich wrapped in plastic.

“I figured you probably hadn’t eaten.” She admits, motioning for him to dig in. He shoots her a thankful look before doing just that, only now realizing how hungry he was.

As he finished his sandwich and had taken a couple of gulps of water, Phoenix cleared her throat, “Have you told her?” She asks.

Almost choking on his water, Hangman looks over to her in confusion, “Sorry?”

Phoenix’s gaze softened, “Jake, I’ve known you for a long time. And never once have I ever seen you react like that. To anything.”

Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Hangman shrugs, “I was worried. That’s all.”

Phoenix shakes her head at his answer, “That wasn’t just worry and you know it.” Hangman feels his throat tighten. He had done good hiding his feelings, hadn’t he?

From his lack of response, Phoenix decided to continue, “You really care about her, don’t you?”

Dropping his gaze to his hands, Hangman chewed on his lip, “Yeah.” Is all he can think to say. Because it’s true. He does care about you... but it’s also so much more than that. So much more.

He can feel Phoenix staring at him and it takes more than he thought it would to lift his eyes to meet hers. Once met, Phoenix’s expression softens into one that he had never seen before.

“Do you love her?” She asks, her voice impossibly quiet.

Blinking at her for a moment, it takes a second before her question hits him. Letting out a slow breath, he leans his head against the wall, his mind filled with nothing but you. All entirely you.

“Yeah.” He breathes out, “I do. I really do.”

Phoenix hums, and Hangman can tell that she already knew the answer to the question before she even asked it.

“Why haven’t you said anything, then?” She questions, turning her body so that she’s facing him full on. All Hangman can do is shrug as he thinks of what to say.

He clears his throat and sniffs as he picks at the skin on his hands, “I guess... I don’t know.” He shakes his head, pinching the bridge of his nose, “I didn’t want to fall in love with her.”

As he says it out loud, it shocks him just as much as he can tell it does Phoenix. She falls back against her seat, letting out a slow breath before she speaks, “What do you mean by that?”

Hangman looks at her as his gut twists with the feelings that he’s been trying to ignore since the day he met you. Running a hand down his face, he inhales deeply before trying to explain, “I... I flirt a lot and I make jokes, but I never expect them to lead anywhere, you know? I know that I come off as this cocky, confident ass who knows exactly what I’m doing- which I do but-”

His ramble is cut off by Phoenix as she cocks her head to the side, “Where is this going?” Her exasperated look brings a slight chuckle out of him as he shakes his head, “Sorry, sorry. What I’m trying to say is despite how I act and everything... I care far more than I let on.”

Hangman’s voice trails off a bit, his words getting caught in his throat as his brain scrambles for the right things to say. Phoenix stays quiet as she urges him to continue, which he does after a moment, “I guess I thought acting like I didn’t care would make it true, but all it’s done is make it clear to me just how much I do care. Not just about Artemis, but about all of you. I don’t know if you even know it but-”

“We do.” Phoenix reassures him as she pats his arm, “We know, of course we do.”

He shoots her a grateful smile before continuing, “And with Artemis... I don’t know- I mean, the thought of falling in love has always been in the back of my mind but I never thought it would actually happen, you know? Especially not with someone like her.”

Phoenix is quiet for a moment, “Did you not mean to fall in love?” She asks hesitantly. Hangman sighs, “I don’t think anyone ever means to... but, I just... I didn’t want to. With what we do...” He looks up to the ceiling, imagining what the night sky looks like above.

“Every time we go up there’s no guarantee that we’re going to come back down.” He says simply, “I couldn’t... I didn’t want to fall in love with her... or even act upon it because I couldn’t bare the thought of leaving her alone. I couldn’t do that.”

His eyes stray on the ceiling tiles before they drift to Phoenix, who stares back at him with an expression full of nothing but sweet understanding. Her hold on his arm tightens a little as she speaks, “Being in this line of work, every pilot knows the risks. We’re actively aware of them every time we fly and though we may not like them, we accept them. We accept the risks.”

Hangman nods along with her words, but his throat tightens in a way that doesn’t allow him to speak. Phoenix catches on to his silence and continues, her voice quiet but stern, “I’ve known Artemis for a long time. She’s one of the most talented, strongest people I’ve ever met. I’ve never known her not to do something out of fear of what could happen. Once she’s set on something, there’s no changing her mind... even despite the risks.”

He knows this about you, he’s seen it. That’s part of why he just completely and utterly adores you. You were never one to back away, despite being scared, though you never let anyone know it. And you never failed to make him laugh with whatever remark you could think of to retaliate against his stupid comments.

Hangman smiles at the thought, though his voice stays quiet. Phoenix pats his arm, “Tell her. Part of being in love is being scared, but if you just talk to her... it won’t be so scary anymore.”

Nodding, Hangman breathes out deeply before fixing Phoenix with a grin, “Since when did you get so wise?”

She smiles, “Always have been. You’ve just refused to acknowledge it.”

He laughs sarcastically, throwing his head back for emphasis. Phoenix lightly hits his bicep, but he notices that she’s laughing too.

Balling up the plastic from his sandwich, Hangman nods to her, “Thanks for the food. And for the pep talk.”

“Anytime.” She responds before getting to her feet and brushing off her pants, “I’m going to head to bed, you should try to get some rest too.”

He gives her a two finger salute, “I’ll try.”

She hums before motioning to his water, “I want you to finish that and then go get another one.” Hangman chuckles as he twists off the cap of his half emptied bottle, “Okay, mom.”

Rolling her eyes, Phoenix turns on her heel, “Night, Hangman.”

“See ya, Phoenix.” He responds, watching her go until she disappears down the hall and out of the doors. Doing as he was told, Hangman drains the rest of his water before tossing it in the recycling. He walks over to the vending machine and presses the buttons for water.

After watching it clamor off the shelf, Hangman reaches down and retrieves the drink from the bottom.

Sitting back down in the uncomfortable chair, he rests his head against the wall and allows his eyes to slip closed. His last thought before he drifts off is of you.

A soft shake to his shoulder is what wakes him. Opening his eyes, Hangman sits up when he sees the nurse standing in front of him, a clipboard in her arm, “Are you here for Lieutenant Y/L/n?”

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Hangman nods as he gets to his feet, “Is she okay?” He asks quickly, his heart rate picking up as he waits for the nurse's response.

She smiles gently, “She’s fine. She just woke up, if you’d like to see her?”

All he can do is nod before the nurse is leading him down to your room. He can hear his heart beating loudly in his ears as his feet carry him through the hall, his hands fidgeting restlessly at his sides.

The nurse stops in front of a door labeled B2 and turns to face him, “She’s on some medication so she may seem a little out of it but she’s going to be completely fine.”

As soon as the words reach him, he feels an unmeasurable amount of relief flood through him, “Okay, thank you. Thank you.”

She gives him one last smile before stepping away and heading into another room. Reaching for the door handle, Hangman finds himself freezing with his hand clasped around the cool metal. A thousand thoughts scramble through his mind before he shakes his head and takes a deep breath.

Turning the handle and hesitantly entering the room, his relief only grows when he sees you sitting up in the hospital bed. You’re in an old academy shirt and sweat pants, the sight of you not in a hospital gown eases his worries ever so slightly. He wasn’t sure if he could handle anything that might make you seem worse off than he thought you were.

As he closes the door behind him, it feels as though his heart practically lights up when you look at him, a smile finding its home on your face at the sight of him. In just seeing you smile at him, he has to stop himself from dropping down on his knee right then and there.

God, he loves you.

Quiet beeping is the first thing you notice, the second being the scratchy sheets underneath your fingertips. Opening your eyes, you squint at the florescent lights before taking a moment to look around.

You’re confused for a moment as you take in the hospital room and the IV’s connected to your arm. Poking at them, you frown. What happened?

The door opening brings your attention away from your arm and to the doctor entering the room. She gives you a smile, “Looks like someone’s finally awake.” She says as she walks over and checks through your chart. You watch her flip through the pages, still confused.

Peering over her clipboard, you can see when she notices your confusion, “How are you feeling, Lieutenant?”

You swallow, “Uh, thirsty.”

Nodding, she heads over to the sink and fills you up a cup of water before handing it to you. You thank her before draining it in a matter of seconds, feeling the cool liquid flow through you.

“Do you remember what happened?” She asks you, looking over the machines that are off to the side of your bed. You think for a moment.

“Um..” You say, leaning your head against the pillow. “We were flying... but then once I got back to the tarmac I started feeling... weird.” You tell her, the events of before blurring in your mind.

She hums as she leans over and places her stethoscope against your chest. It’s cold against you skin as she talks to you, “You passed out from heat exhaustion.” She informs before returning her instrument to its home around her neck, “Why they had you go up in the air when it was pushing close to 125 degrees, I don’t know.”

Biting your lip, you wring your hands together as you think back to earlier. You remember the excitement from completing the maneuver- completing it perfectly. But then how disoriented and distant you felt comes back to you, the feeling of the metal ladder still beneath your hands.

“I will say, you’re lucky your friends were able to get you here so quickly, or else we’d be having a very different conversation right now.” The doctor’s voice breaks you from your thoughts.

You turn to her, a question playing on your lips, “My friends?”

She nods, “Lieutenants Seresin, Trace, and Floyd. They alerted my staff and we were able to get you help within minutes of you losing consciousness. I was very impressed with them.”

That’s right, you were out flying with them. You remember how Hangman was the one who came over to ask if you were okay. How he was right by your side when you passed out.

How he was the one who caught you.

You feel your heart rate pick up and heat flood to your face, nothing but his concerned voice playing on loop through your mind.

“Lieutenant?” The doctor asks. You turn to her, “Can I see him?”

She looks taken aback by the urgency in your voice, but then understanding filters across her features, “Of course. Let me just finish up here and then I’ll have someone get him for you.”

You nod, the rest of what she does goes by in a haze and before you know it you’re left alone in the room. Looking down, you tug on a loose string on your shirt, thankful to not be in a hospital gown.

You never were one for hospitals, the pristine cleanliness of the room and the bright fluorescents bringing you nothing but discomfort. Sipping at the new cup of water the doctor had given you before she left, you try to focus on something else.

The ticking of the clock almost sounds as though it’s mocking you, each click only adding to your uneasiness. Sitting up on the bed, you fold your legs together in front of you, resting your hands impatiently in your lap.

You’re just about ready to jump out of the bed and go see what’s taking so long when the door opens, revealing the very man who ensured that you got here. Watching as he walks in and gently closes the door behind him, all of your uneasiness seems to melt away the second you meet his gaze.

The relief in just having him here in front of you makes you feel fuzzy, but in a good way. The best way. A smile makes its way to your face, and you can think to do nothing but hold out your hand to him.

Surprise floods across his features for just a moment before he’s taking your hand and sitting down on the edge of the bed, his thumb circling gently across your knuckles.

As you watch him, you feel your heart pick up and heat rise in your face. Though this time, you can’t find it in you to care about the heat. Not with him sitting right there, holding your hand in such a way that dissipates every worry you ever had.

Not quite knowing what to say or do, you slowly reach towards him and cup the side of his face, tilting his head up so that he’s looking at you. Meeting him with a smile, you gently brush your thumb across his cheek, “Hey.”

He relaxes into your touch, “Hey.” You don’t miss how uncharacteristically quiet he is, or how he’s holding your hand as if it’s the only thing anchoring him down, “You okay?” You ask softly.

He huffs out a laugh, reaching up to take your other hand in his own, “I feel like I should be the one asking you that.”

You squeeze his hands, “I’m okay.” Leaning forward, you’re so close to him now that you can smell the sweet honey of his cologne, “Thanks to you.”

And does he ever just look at you. As your eyes meet, you’re overwhelmed with everything that’s swimming within the sea of blues staring back at you. Hangman studies your face for a moment before taking a deep breath, “You really scared me, you know.”

Your brows crease together as a frown pulls down on your lips, “I’m sorry.”

He shakes his head, “You don’t have to be, there’s nothing to be sorry for.”

“But I can understand.” You tell him, “How scary it is, I mean... to see someone just... collapse like that.”

He stares back at you, his eyes searching for something but you’re not quite sure what, “That’s the thing... it wasn’t just someone. It was you.”

Your breath catches in your throat as he speaks, your head shaking slightly, “I don’t-”

“I know I can be an ass sometimes.” Hangman interrupts you quickly. You blink, your mind almost short circuiting because where did that come from? He takes your confused silence as a sign to continue, “I know how annoying you find me and-and that you can’t stand me but seeing you- watching you fall and being barely able to catch you made me realize something.”

Your chest tightens, your heart beating so loud in your ears that you’re surprised you can even hear him as he goes on, “I... I realized that I don’t want to be scared anymore. I don’t want to be scared of- of what I feel, or what sort of unpredictable things could happen in this life.”

“Jake...” You start but he shakes his head and pulls your hands to his chest, “I have spent so much of my life being scared- being scared of things that I almost never even got the chance to have.”

All you can do is stare at him, a million thoughts racing through your head. A part of you is searching for how to respond while the other part is so eager to hear what he has to say. You don’t even notice how you’re leaning closer to him, hanging on to every word as if it’s the very thing that’s breathing air into your lungs.

Hangman stares back at you, his eyes glistening in such a way as they reflect the lights that no longer seem so unbearable, “There’s so much that I want to say to you, but that- that fear held me back for so long that I...” He shakes his head, dropping his gaze to your hands.

You immediately miss the sea of blues, your heart pulling as you watch him struggle to speak, “Tell me.” You lift his chin up, your faces mere inches apart, “Talk to me, Jake.”

“I’d never forgive myself if I never got the chance to tell you...” He whispers, his breath ghosting across your lips. Gently moving your hand to the back of his neck, your fingers tangle in the ends of his hair, “Tell me now.”

He looks back at you, his eyes telling you everything you need to know even before the words pass through his lips, “I love you.” He’s barely finished speaking before you’re closing the distance between the two of you, your lips slotting against his.

You feel his arms wrap around your back as he pulls you to him, the small amount of space in between the two of you closed off in one movement. One hand tangles in his hair while the other cups the side of his face, the fire inside you surging throughout your entire being as you deepen the kiss.

Your hands trail down his back, gripping onto his shirt just as the two of you break apart, gasping for air. You breathe him in, every part of him as you stare into his eyes, the cool blues doing little to calm the heat igniting within you.

He reaches up and cups the sides of your face, leaning forward until his forehead is resting against your own, “I love you. God, I love you.” He says, placing a gentle kiss against your lips once more.

You smile into it, “And I love you.” You lean back so you can see his face. Your heart flutters as his expression practically lights up, everything that he is positively beaming at you, “I love you... even when you annoy me.”

He laughs and the sound is the sweetest melody to your ears. Wrapping your arms around him, you bury your face in the crook of his neck as he holds you, “What I would give to be able to freeze this moment and be able to live in it forever.” He says softly, his voice muffled slightly by your shoulder.

Your face is beginning to hurt from how hard you’re smiling, but you can’t find it in you to care when you lean back and stare into those beautiful eyes that you promise to commit to memory, “Why stay here when we have the rest of our lives?” You ask him.

There’s no greater joy than watching his eyes widen and his smile grow, “You mean that?” He asks, holding you tighter. Your head falls back as you laugh, “No, I was just saying it to sound cute.”

“Oh, you-” Hangman cuts himself off as he kisses you, his lips fitting against yours in such a perfect way that you can’t believe you waited this long. He leans against you and you feel yourself get pushed gently into the pillows, “I will never stop loving you.” He says into the kiss.

You push him back with a hand against his chest, “Is that a promise, Seresin?”

He looks down at you with a smile, nothing but love swimming in his eyes, “With everything that I am, darlin'. I love you.”

Your hand turns and you're pulling him to you by the collar of his shirt. You pause just before your lips touch, “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” Then you kiss him, all the love you have for this man and his absolute ridiculousness going into it.

The idea of love used to scare you. But knowing what you feel for Jake, it doesn’t seem so scary anymore.

☆☆☆

A/n: Hangman is an absolute sweetheart when it comes to the person he loves. I swear by that, and I love him for it. Hope you liked it :)

Tags: @rosiahills22 @obiwankenobis-lap @haljordangreenjedi @ollyoxenfrees @dempy @alluringshawn

#milano writes a story #jake seresin fic #hangman x reader #jake hangman seresin #natasha phoenix trace #robert bob floyd #fanboy #payback #tgm #top gun fic #reader insert #jake seresin x reader #i love this man

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