#man. just the beauty of fiona gallagher. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

breanime · 3 years

Note

Omg I just saw that you opened your follower event up to prequel/sequels for your gif Drabble event and I’m so excited!!

And now I need a sequel to my Fiona Gallagher angst gif Drabble with the prompts “That’s my girl!” from the fluff list and “I missed you so much, baby” and “Take off your clothes” from the smut list 🙌🏼🙌🏼

Oh this has just made my day 🥰🥰

Part One

warning: steamy (my first explicit female x female scene! Let me know how I did!, it's brief, but I like it)

Fiona hadn’t spoken to you in five days, and it was killing her. You came around to see the kids, spent a few hours helping Ian study, did a con with Lip, but you never came into the house. Never asked to see her.

And Fiona was desperate for you.

Knowing you’d be at Carl’s football game, Fiona made sure to wear a short leather skirt with her jersey; she knew how much you loved her legs. And so she made a show of sitting and crossing them on the bleachers, just a few feet away from you. Of course, once the game started, you were both on your feet, screaming at the refs and cheering Carl on, and Fiona loved how much you loved her brother, her family. You were always there for her, always a supportive, encouraging force in her life—like V, except you two fucked. And as much as Fiona had loved Jimmy/Steve (read: loved, past tense), she knew that she had hit the jackpot with you.

You were her soulmate.

She was watching you now, those big brown eyes of hers tracing your form, hunger for your touch. When Carl broke another kid’s nose, you clapped and cheered as if he’d won the damn game. Fiona watched, touched, as Debbie ran down to you, getting your advice on the popular girls in her class. Liam practically jumped out of Lip’s arms to greet you, and Ian and Lip kept leaving her to go talk to you.

They really loved you. And you loved them. It was clear in your smile, your shimmering, beautiful eyes, your laugh. Fiona felt an ache in her chest as she watched you, and she wondered how in the hell did she last this long without having you with her. How did she go to bed each night without kissing you first? How did she wake up in the morning without her hands on you, your soft flesh warming her up before she was even fully awake? How did she manage the house without you by her side? How did she do a damn thing without her love? Fiona was still deep in though when she felt a hand on her thigh. She turned, wide eyed, to see a man sitting next to her.

“Fiona Gallagher,” he grinned over at her, “Long time.”

It took her a second, but finally she remembered him—and the high school quick fuck she’d had with him all those years ago. “Right,” she took his hand and moved it off of her, “Travis, right?”

He frowned, “Uh, no… Actually, it’s Trevor.”

“Okay,” she said, her disinterest clear. She turned back to the game.

“So, uh… I’m in town visiting my dad,” he started, “I thought maybe me and you could… hang out?” His hand was on her knee again, and Fiona felt the anger rise up in her. But this was Carl’s game, and she didn’t want to cause a scene…

…except then she looked up and saw you watching her—watching them—and Fiona couldn’t let you think she was entertaining this clown.

So she stood up and punched him.

The crowd gasped, and Trevor-Travis ran off, calling her a bitch. But Fiona was only focused on you…

…and the wide smile on your face.

“That’s my girl!” You cried out, nothing but pride on your face.

Fiona was out of self-control, as soon as she saw that smile directed at her, she had no choice but to go to you. She ran to you, launching herself into your arms, and kissed you. Her heart floated when you kissed her back.

“I’m so fucking sorry,” she said, breathless from your kiss, “I was a dick, it’s hereditary, but it was wrong, I was wrong, I’m so fucking sorry, I—”

You silenced her with a kiss. “You’re more than a dick,” you grinned, “You’re an ass. But you’re my ass, and I love you,” you kissed her again, your tongue going into her mouth, making Fiona’s knees weak, “I missed you so much, baby,” you whispered against her pursed lips.

That was all she needed to hear. “Lip, take the kids out to eat after the game,” she said, grabbing a fistful of crumpled bills and thrusting them at her brother, “Take as long as you need.”

He grinned, putting the cash in his pocket, “Right back at’cha.”

It didn’t take long for you and Fiona to get home. She slammed you against the kitchen counter, your mouths connected. She couldn’t get enough of you; she needed you. Fiona Gallagher needed you. And she didn’t need easy. “Take off your clothes.”

You grinned, “Take ‘em off for me.”

She didn’t need to be told twice.

You and Fiona made it to her bed in record time, shedding clothes around the way. She pushed you onto your back on the bed, and for a second, she had to stop.

“What?” You asked, confused.

Fiona shook her head. “Nothing. I’m just lucky.”

She crawled over your body, leaving kisses along the way until she was kissing your mouth again. Her hand shimmied down between the two of you, two delicate fingers stroking your core. The two of you made out like that, tongues sliding together as Fiona fingered you, until you were gasping into her mouth as you came. Satisfied that you were satisfied, Fiona raised her fingers to her mouth and sucked them clean, hungry for your taste. You grinned back, gently pressing your hand on the top of her head.

She got the message.

Fiona was an expert at eating you out. She knew how to lick and suck and kiss your wetness until all you could say was her name, and this was no different. If anything, she was more aware of the effect she had on you now, and she was dedicated to making this the best damn make-up sex you’d ever had. Smirking, she took hold of your ankles and held your legs apart. Fiona took a second to admire your pretty, pink pussy, wet and open and all for her. She buried her face between your legs and let go of your ankles, instead reaching up to palm your breasts, kneading your nipples between her wet fingers as you gasped and moaned.

“Fuck, Fiona!” You cried out, legs shaking. You came again, and just like she wanted…

…all you could say was her name.

Grinning, Fiona kissed her way back to your face, her eyes soft as she looked down at you. You were beautiful, you were perfect… you were hers. “Stay,” she whispered, an echo of what she’d said to you that night, the night of your fight, “please.”

You kissed her, “I’m here,” you promised, “I’m not going anywhere. Now, you told the kids to stay out all night, so…

…why don’t you grab the box under the bed and we can really get this party started?”

Fiona damn near flipped the bed, she was so eager to fulfil your request. Truly, she didn’t need to rush like this. After all…

…you had all night.

************************************************************************

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#fiona gallagher #fiona gallagher x reader #fiona gallagher imagine #shameless us #bre's follow up follower event #breanime's follow up follower event

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teacupcollector · 2 years

Text

Fiona Gallagher x Reader

Summary: Meeting Fiona was a whirl wind of emotions. Leaving her was something you regretted but didn't have a choice in doing. When an injury sends you back home you are reluctant to see her again. Especially with Steve/Jimmy back in the picture. You cannot guarantee her happiness so why ruin it by coming back into her life? Loving from afar is all you can do...

Warning: Illusions to Suicide, Past Violence Resulting in Injury, A lot of angst

A/N: I am unsure if I want to continue this, or what to call it but I hope you enjoy!

Meeting Fiona Gallagher was something else. She was so bold and out there. Especially when it came to her family. She was protective and steadfast. She was everything you loved and leaving her was the hardest thing you ever could have done.

You met Fiona when you were in boot camp she was still with Steve/Jimmy. She was working at some bar in some short skirt and a skimpy top. Not that you didn't hate the sight. You hated the men who looked at her as if she was a piece of ass that they can hit an quit the next day. Not to sound creepy, but you always visited on her shift, made sure to get seated in her section, and left a big tip. As much as you could afford at least. You weren't that well off. She started talking to you after you got kicked out of the place. A group of guys were catcalling her and even though you wanted to step in you knew she could take care of herself. That was until they touched her. Slipped dollar bills into her pants and stroked her stomach and thighs. She was obviously uncomfortable but couldn't do anything without losing her job. You ended up breaking that mans finger and another mans' nose. After that all of you were tossed out but those guys didn't walk away with out a fight. Despite being a woman you held your own against the four for a bit. What you didn't take for account was the amount of rings one of the guys had on. They beat you to a pulp and left you by a dumpster.

When you come to your senses you saw her beautiful brown eyes and you smiled. "Hey... Hey!" You finally hear her. "Hey... Beautiful..." You say in a haze. "What you did was really stupid.... You okay?" She asks holding out her hand. You nod and grab it as she hoists you up. "As good as I'll ever be-" You are cut off by bile rising to your throat and quickly turn away into a garbage bag and throw up. "Jesus!" She exclaims as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. "You are really fucking stupid you know that?!" She says grabbing your chin and looking into your eyes. "You got a hell of a concussion..." You just smile and gently move her hand away. "It was worth it..." She rolls her eyes. "You got a place?" She asks and you chuckle. "Trying to take me home?" You ask and she sighs as well. "I don't swing that way." She says and you nod lifting your hands in surrender. "Sorry I didn't mean to over s-ste-" You turn around and barf into the trashcan again. "J-Jesus this was not how I wanted to meet you..." You say solemnly. "You wanted to meet me?" She asks shocked. You nod "Uh huh... I have been sitting in your section a-" "And giving me big tips. Yeah thanks for that. You tryin' to butter me up?" She sounds angry and you sigh. "Look I'm sorry... I didn't know how to talk to you. You're a pretty girl an- Jesus No one knows I'm gay... But I wanted to shoot my shot..." She sighs and nods. "You have anyone waiting at home for you?" She asks and you shake your head. "Uh no... I live alone... Kind of..." You mumble and she looks at you confused. "Look it's fine I will leave you alone... I didn't mean to cause trouble... I just know how it is like to be objectified and I couldn't stand by and let it happen to you." You say and begin to stumble away when she catches your wrist. "Look... I can't have it on my conscience that someone died defending my honor. Which you will never do again I might add!" She says in a scolding tone. She ended up taking you to her house that night. She stayed up to make sure you didn't fall asleep again, held your hair when you were throwing up, and listened to your nervous rambling. From then on you had a friendship that blossomed into something more. When she found out that you were to be shipped off in a few months she was heart broken but she pushed through for a while. Sent care packages when she could, sent letters, sometimes nudes which you enjoyed sometimes, but you always told her that you loved her. In every letter, package, hell you would spell it out on your tits when you had the time to send a polaroid. Through her letters she said it would always make her laugh. That was until your third tour. You guys got into a big argument.

"Your fucking leaving?! You just got back a month ago!" Fiona exclaims. "Fiona you know how this works baby... I didn't know until today and It took me a lot to get this much time with you already. Let's ju-" "No! You can't just come here and let us get use to you and take off again!" "Fiona she c-" "Zip it Ian!" You sigh. "Baby I know you are tired of this long distance thing but if you can just wait a little lon-" "No! I am done waiting! I am tired of waiting!" You walk up to her and cup her shoulders. "Fi please... Let's not spend the last two nights together angry we can ju-" "No! I am not going to wait around for you to get yourself killed! You should-" "I didn't have a choice Fiona!" You exclaim. "I didn't have a choice! I was in a shitty situation and I needed an out!" Fiona lets out a sarcastic laugh. "Oh we all are in shitty situations and w-" "This was all I could get! If I knew I was going to meet you I wouldn't have joined in the first place!" You say as tears start streaming down your face. "I love you so much Fiona Gallagher. Please... Just wait for me..." "No I am done waiting! The last time I waited for someone they never came back!" You cup her face and look at her in the eyes. "I am not Steve... It hurts that you think I am..." You lean into kiss her but she pushes you away. "Just leave..." She says quietly. "Fi..." "Just get out! I am done! I can't take this bullshit any longer!" She says and walks into the kitchen. "Fi I can't do that! I live here and I love the family we have!" You say following her into the kitchen. "I do-" "Just leave! We don't want you here! We don't need you...." Your heart feels like it stops. "If you want me to go I will but please Fiona... I love you..." Fiona turns around and stays silent. "Please just say it back... Say it back to me please..." You say with a sniffle but she stays silent. You know she is just angry and she will come to her senses soon but it doesn't make it hurt less. You turn around and walk up the stairs. You hear a couple pairs of foot steps behind you as you exit Fiona's room with your stuff. "Are you really leaving?" Debbie asks and you let out a quivering sigh and nod. "Yeah my loves I'm leaving... But I promise I will be back as soon as I can." You say and Debbie runs into you with a hug followed by Carl who you can see now. You kiss the top of their heads and give them a tearful smile. You hear two more pairs and look up to see Ian and Lip. "I know you both are pissed at me... They cut my leave short... I didn't expect it..." You say as you walk toward them and open your arms. Ian immediately hugs you "She is just angry she will snap out of it." He says as he pulls away. Lip walks up and gives you a side hug and nods in agreement. You kissed all their foreheads including Liam's before heading down stairs. "Baby?" You call out but it is left unanswered. "I love you Fi..." You say and wait a few seconds. When there is no response you sigh and walk out the door.

"(Y/N) What are you doing here? When did you get back?" Kevin asks shocked and almost excited. "And Je- What the fuck happened to you!" He says gesturing to your left arm or lack there of. You have tears in your eyes as you look at him. "Missed you Kev..." You say with a sniffle. Kevin knocks on the bar before saying "Alright dipshits! I'm closing early!" There was a sound of groans and they all left after about five minutes. Kevin locks the door from the inside and immediately comes to sit next to you. "What happened? When did you get back?" You hug him as tight as you can and let out a small sob. Kevin gently surrounds you in a brotherly embrace. "I missed you all s-so much!" You cry. "Have you called Fi-" "No." "What why?" You pull away and sniff again. "She doesn't want anything to do with me..." Kevin looks at you as if you shot his dog. "You know that isn't true right?" He asks and you shake your head. "It is... You know about our argument before I left... I get letters from Debbie and she says Steve is back..." Kevin's face drops. You know that he knows but you aren't mad at him for it. "Does anyone know you are home?" He asks and you shake your head. "I came here first... You are the only person who knows and it is going to stay that way." You say sternly. "(Y/-" "I need a favor." Kevin stands up waving his hands. "Woah, woah, woah!" He says and paces for a second. "At least tell me what happened that caused that..." He says gesturing to your missing arm. You chuckle before removing your hat to show that you also have an ear missing. "Jesus fuck (Y/N)!" He exclaims. "I uh... I attempted to throw back an explosive..." Kevin's face seems to grow even more shocked by the second. "Wh-" "My whole squad were in a fucked position... I had to do something and this was the aftermath..." Kevin takes a breath and sits next to you again. "It was always you who would play the hero..." Kevin says with a small laugh. "What is the favor?" He asks sadly. "And why does it seem like I am never going to see you again?" You sigh and wipe your eyes before setting down your duffle bag and rifling through it. You take out an envelope that hasn't been sealed so he can look at it and set it on the bar. He pauses for a moment but then picks it up to look at it. "A check?" He asks.

You nod. "Yeah... My compensation... I placed you as the home address. I would have done Fi's but I wasn't sure if Frank was still around." You say as you place your hand in your lap gripping your pants leg. "I did the math and both you and V are included. It's not much but it can pay bills, Help the kids get better clothes, and may-" "You can't give us this!" Kevin exclaims. "What about you? Where is your cut?" He asks and you shake your head. "I don't need it." "Like hell you don't need it have you looked at yourself!" He says his voice rising. "I'll be fine! I ca-" "What about medicine? O-Or clothes! Painkillers! You must be hurting!" He says shoving the check toward you but you shove it back. "I'm fine! Kevin Ple-" "No Yo-" "KEVIN LISTEN TO ME!" You scream and this shuts him up. "You are going to take this money, buy clothes, food, hell even Christmas presents for that household!" "We don't ne-" "I know you don't but I want to! Please just do this for me!" You plead. Kevin pauses. "Why? Why give this to us?" You sigh and look away. "I'm going to end up dead in a ditch anyway so why take the money with me?" You say before standing up and walking behind the bar. "Which is why we need to help you!" Kevin says. "I am not going to be some other burden for all of you to carry!" You shout. "You aren't a burden... There are people who love you!" He says standing up and going behind the bar helping you open a beer. "I don't want help." You say blinking back tears. "I'm sure Fi-" "She has Steve and his money... I just want to do this last thing for her and that family..." A few tears slip down your cheeks as you take a swig. "I love her. I love Fiona and the kids! I love both you and Veronica!" You say turning toward him. "I just want to do one last thing and then I will be happy." You say setting down the beer and wiping your eyes before picking it back up again and taking a sip. "Then at least come with me. You can give it to them yourself!" He says trying to convince you to stay. "I am not going to ruin their dynamic... They have Steve to take care of them... They don't need me messing it all up..." You say. "She would drop Steve the minute she saw you..." Kevin says and you shake your head. "No... I wouldn't want her to. She deserves better then me. Better then him... But he makes her happy and I am not going to stand in the way of that... I am not going to be a burden..." You say chugging the rest of your drink and tossing it in the trash behind the bar. You scoot by him and grab your hat. "Don't tell anyone about it. Say you made extra cash at the bar or something." You say as you put it on and lean down with a grunt to grab your duffle. "Are you really doing this?" Kevin asks defeated and you nod. "I love you all..." You say and quickly duck out of the establishment.

Debbie is in her room looking through the letters she recently received. They weren't from you as they usually were they were from some military officer. It had a first class stamp on it and everything. It was well into the night but she needed to understand what this is. Everyone other then Fiona knew that they still got letters. Before you left on your third tour you and Fiona had a bad fight and for a while Fiona would just burn your letters before even opening them so Debbie and some of the others started checking the mail before she could and hide them. It became a routine. Debbie and everyone would send you letters back on occasion so you would know that they are still thinking about you but now this military jargon is messing with her head. Since letters like this have been coming for a week now. Debbie quietly slips out of her room and makes her way to the boys room. While doing this she can hear Fiona and some of her friends downstairs. When she gets there she goes up to Ian's bed and shakes him while whispering. "psst Ian!" Ian is startled awake and looks at her. "What do you want Debs?" He asks rubbing his eyes. "It's a letter! From (Y/N) it makes absolutely no sense!" She says and Ian sits up and turns on a lamp. He looks through the letter as his face turns from tired to serious. "Wake up Carl and Lip... We need to tell Fiona." Debbie's eyes widen. "What?! No! She will try and burn it before we can figure out what this means!" Debbie says her voice rising. This rouses Lip from his sleep. "What the fuck are you two doing up?" He asks and Debbie sighs. "There is a letter from some Military Officer and not from (Y/N)..." Lip hops down and walks over to look at it.

Meanwhile downstairs in the living room Fiona, Steve, and Veronica are sitting and laughing while drinking a few beers. "So where is Kevin? He should be here!" Fiona says and Veronica shrugs. "I don't know he says he has been taking extra shifts at The Alibi." Right as she says that Kevin walks through the door. "Delivery!" He says as he walks to Fiona and Veronica handing them their own envelope and Veronica squeals and takes it to count but Fiona is still reluctant. "You should save all this money for the baby..." "You say that every time Fi I told you it's fine!" he says with a forced smile on his face. Fiona notices this and raises a brow. "Where do you get this money again?" She asks and Kevin Shrugs. "The Alibi! Don't worry about it!" He says when Steve chimes in. "Who cares where it's from! It's money and that's all that matters!" He says with a smirk and Fiona sighs rolling her shoulders out. That is when Debbie, Lip, Ian, and Carl comes down stairs somewhat in a rush. "What are you guys doing down here?" Veronica asks. "We have something for you Fiona..." Ian says slowly. "Can't it wait till morning? It's a school night." But Debbie shakes her head, seemingly close to tears. "What is Debs?" She asks and Lip responds. "It's about (Y/N)..." Fiona tenses up and Steve asks. "Who is (Y/N)?" "It doesn't matter who she is she isn't important." She says flatly. "You know that's not true!" Debbie exclaims. "She is important to all of us! We all love her and so do you!" Debbie says nearly screaming. "Debbie!" Fiona says shocked. "She's back!" Debbie says and Kevin slowly makes his way out of the room which doesn't go unnoticed by Veronica so she follows him. "Kev?" She asks and He tenses up. "Uh yeah V?" He says nervously. "What are you hiding?" She asks sternly. "Hiding? I'm not hiding!" He says and Veronica storms up to him where they are practically chest to chest. "I know when you are lying now tell me!" "Then I might as well tell everyone..." He says walking back into the living room where Debbie is bawling her eyes out, The boys trying to get through to Fiona and Fiona seems to be hyperventilating. "Guys..." Kevin says but they don't seem to be listening. That is when Veronica speaks up. "GUYS!" They all pause their arguing and look at Kevin.

Kevin takes a deep breath before speaking. "I saw (Y/N)... She came to The Alibi a month ago..." They all in unison scream. "What?!" He nods his head. "She didn't want to see everyone because of... What was the word... Dynamic I think. She said that since Steve is here she didn't want to ruin it... She didn't even want me to tell you." He says sighing. "And the money... That's from her. Sh-" "We aren't a fucking charity case you find her and take this shit back!" Fiona says standing up and handing her envelope to him. "If you saw her you would think it was the other way around?" Kevin says and Fiona looks confused. "What does that mean?" She asks and that is when Lip speaks up. "She was medically discharged a few months ago... Came back to the states a month and a half ago..." Fiona looks over at Lip. "Medically discharge? Is she hurt what does it say?" She asks walking over and taking the letter from him. "It talks about her compensation and the address to find her but she listed Kevin and Veronicas address..." Ian says looking down at his hands. "How did you get this letter?" She asks. "Well..." Debbie speaks up. "I send her letters..." Fiona looks shocked. "What?" "You started burning (Y/N)'s letters so we all made sure to look through the mail before you got to it..." Carl says. "I... I thought she stopped sending them..." Fiona says as tears well up in her eyes. "Where is she now?" She asks Kevin and he shrugs. "I don't know... She said that it was going to be the last time I saw her..." Veronica hits his shoulder. "So you just let her go!" "She was adamant! I wasn't going to turn my back on her!" Kevin exclaimed. "When was the last time you saw her?" Debbie asks. "A month ago but I have guys keeping tabs on her. She is still in Chicago. That's all I know..." He says quietly. "Okay, okay guys. Lip you and Carl go to all the homeless shelters in the Area. Ian you and Debbie check every hospital! V and Kev you guys ask around... I might know where she is..." Steve stands up from the couch. "What about me?" He asks and Fiona gets an unpleasant shiver. "Uh... You stay with Liam..." She says and then goes to get ready.

#fiona gallagher #Fiona Gallagher x Fem Reader #lip gallagher #ian gallagher #debbie gallagher #carl gallagher #liam gallagher #fiona gallagher x jimmy lishman #shameless #shameless (u.s)#fxf #heavy angst #unrequited love #military reader #x military reader #x fem reader

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arrowflier · 2 years

Note

Hi Arrow I love your fics so much. If you’re still taking prompts, I would love your take on the first time Ian called Mickey “baby” and the first time Mickey reciprocated. Speed write or long form - your choice. mucho mucho gracias! 🥰

Relevant to your interests: Baby

Being His Baby Don't Make Me A Bitch (on AO3 or continue below)

Ian had never been that big on nicknames. Maybe it was because he had too many of his own growing up, and not all of them good.

He was Fiona’s “sweetface”, sure, and Lip’s “little brother”; he was “kid”, and he was “red”, and he was on occasion, from Liam, just “E”.

But he was also “that fucking Gallagher boy”. He was “the coked-out lap-dancing whore”. He was “carrot-boy”, he was Frank’s “redheaded cocksucking bastard”, he was “the crazy one”, and “the gay one”, and “the one with all the problems”.

Fuck; he was “Gay Jesus”. Like he wasn’t even worth his own name.

With Mickey, it had always been different.

Mickey’s “tough guy” sounded more like admiration than a challenge; “Gallagher” sounded like a prayer. “Army” was for teasing, not for judging, and even “you fucking moron” was lighter than air.

He had missed that, while Mickey was gone. Missed the easy way they spoke; missed the names, and the way they sounded in Mickey’s mouth. With Mickey, he didn’t care that it wasn’t his real name—his name was carved into Mickey’s very chest, after all, never to be forgotten. He just cared that Mickey was with him, and that each nickname sounded like love.

He basked in Mickey’s “move over, princess,” in the rec room, when he forced himself onto the sofa at Ian’s side. He reveled in the quiet “you good, doc?” when he returned from working the infirmary and climbed into his bunk with a sigh. He breathed in “that’s it, beautiful” in the middle of the night, too quiet for anyone else to hear, and he bit his lip at “nice try, asshole,” in the cafeteria the next morning when he reached for Mickey’s dessert.

Still, he never offered his own monikers. Never whispered “lover” in Mickey’s ear, or called him “sweetheart”, or called him “dear”. He wanted to, wanted to offer his own comforts, his own affection, but years of suppression were hard to overcome.

Once a man told you that calling him sugar would result in your bones being ground down to dust and sprinkled on pastries like so much of the same, you tended to stick to his name.

But more and more, Mickey’s name didn’t feel like enough. And in his head, Ian started calling him other things, better things: things like “darling”, and “beloved”. Things like “mine”.

Only in his head, though. Only where it was safe. Where Mickey couldn’t hear it, and where no one else could care.

Until he slipped.

They were in the cafeteria when it happened. Side by side, as always, feet touching beneath the table by excuse of overcrowding. The yellow of their prison uniforms wrinkled with the closeness of their arms, their hips, and their forearms brushed with every bite of nutritional slop.

“So I was tellin’ ‘im,” Mickey was saying, gesturing with his spoon—the unsharpened one in his hand, not the one in his shoe, “that if he really thought he could take me, he was welcome to find me at rec time.”

The man across from them laughed.

“No way,” he said, disbelieving. “I know you got balls, Milkovich, but taking on Crazy Cal? You’d be lucky if that fucker left enough of you to patch up.”

“Please,” Mickey snorted, dropping his spoon to push the mush around on his tray. “That guy’s all talk. I could take ‘im.”

“Take him where?” another guy asked. “Out to dinner? Cause you’d be on the menu.”

Ian could feel Mickey bristling beside him. It had started in good fun, perhaps, but he was going to take it personally. His hand was tensing on his spoon, holding it more like the knife it wasn’t, and his thigh tensed as he half-rose.

Ian stopped him with a hand on his arm. No pressure, just a solid weight.

“Calm down,” he said, his tone joking, the thread of warning something only Mickey would hear. “They’re just kidding, baby.”

And Mickey froze, and quieted.

But so did everything else.

“Did you just call Milkovich a baby?” someone asked down the line of the table, choking on laughter.

“Nah, he didn’t say a baby,” someone else corrected, even as Ian closed his eyes in horror. “He just called him baby. Like, his baby.”

Laughs went around the table. Mickey was tenser than ever under his hand, and then he wasn’t—not because he had relaxed, but because he had pulled away.

“That right Milkovich?” came the first taunt, the first of many. “You such a girl you need pretty names to make you feel better?”

“Knew you took it Milkovich, you scream like a goddamn banshee about it,” came the next, “but you really that much of a bitch?”

“Hey now, Murphy,” someone called out, “he said baby, not bitch. Milkovich just needs a good daddy to—”

His head crashed into the table before he could finish.

“What was that, Jackson?” Mickey asked pleasantly, as if he hadn’t nearly knocked Ian on his ass and sent three other inmates face-first into their slop just to interrupt. “Afraid I didn’t catch that last bit.”

“Yo, Milkovich,” another man said, “what the fuck?”

“Oh, you confused, Jefferson?” Mickey asked. He lifted his gaze to the man across the table, still holding the first one down. The head in his hand slid a bit against the plastic table, wet with blood from his split lip, but Mickey tugged harshly back into place.

“See, Jackson here,” Mickey shook the hair in his fist for effect, “thought it would be appropriate to comment on what my friend Gallagher just called me. But I,” he raised his eyebrows, not a challenge, just a statement, “I think that’s none of his fucking business.”

He released his captive suddenly, letting him slide half-conscious out of his seat.

“Who do you agree with?” Mickey asked, addressing the room at large. “Me, or the fucker I just put on the floor?”

“You,” came the quick reassurance.

“Good,” Mickey said, backing away. “That’s good.” He walked all the way down the table, past Ian even, eying each and every one of them. “Now don’t fucking forget it,” he ordered. “Cause he might have called me baby, but I ain’t nobody’s bitch.”

Then he was turning, and leaving, and Ian was still sitting there, and fuck—he had just done the one thing Mickey hadn’t wanted, and he had ruined his cred in front of everyone, and he was going to be so mad—

Ian didn’t even look as he jumped up from the long table, sending his own tray and someone else’s clattering. He didn’t look at the eyes on him, didn’t care except for what it might mean to Mickey, who was already almost out of the room.

“Mickey,” Ian gasped out, chasing after him through the cafeteria. A few guards looked askance at them, but if they hadn’t responded to the fight, they weren’t going to stop them now.

“Mickey wait,” Ian tried, his long legs allowing him to catch up easily. He reached out, snagged Mickey’s elbow. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

Mickey turned around. And there was no anger on his face.

“Sorry for what?” he asked nonchalantly, still backing toward the doors. “Come on, let’s head back to our bunk.”

Ian gaped at him, then shut his mouth with a click of teeth when Mickey’s lips spread in a slow, wicked smile.

“Come on,” he said again, then, “baby.”

And laughed when Ian passed him to take the lead.

#daily speedwrite #gallavich #prison era #fanfic #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich

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y0itsbri · 3 years

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Hi Bri 🥰

C-16 if you'd like to 👀

Coffee dates and disasters

au with college!lip and barista!mandy where ian is a frequent visitor at the campus café and meets mickey under rather unfortunate circumstances. don't cry over spilled milk, buddy.

which also fits under a.u.gust for @gallavichthings

words: 2.4k

"never would have thought you the type to come to one of these places," ian mused, looking around the small café with only lamps and string lights illuminating the space. "can't believe college changed you, man," ian clutched at his heart dramatically.

"don't worry. 'm still the annoying bastard you love so dearly," lip squeezed ian's shoulder before he sauntered up to the counter.

the barista's bored expressed brightened when she saw them. her perky demeanor was matched by a high pitched voice, "hey lip," she smiled, dark lipstick striking. she appraised ian with a somewhat predatory eye, "hello, lip's friend."

"uh, brother," ian coughed.

lip rolled his eyes, "and he's gay so don't even try it, mandy."

she pouted and flicked her hair behind her shoulder, "not that it's any of your business, anyways."

ian chuckled besides him, drawing another smile out of mandy, this one kinder, sweeter.

"what can i get you boys?"

the pink highlights glistened in her dark hair as she whipped up lip's cold brew and ian's caramel macchiato, then proceeded to insist that this one is on the house. neither of them argued, but thanked her before they settled down in some stools by the window.

"fucking the barista privileges?" ian asked, raising his eyebrow at his slut of a brother.

"i think of it more like fellow south sider charity," he rubbed his bottom lip, "but yours works too," lip smirked around the edges of his coffee cup.

"you're an idiot."

"can a man who got us free drinks really be deemed an idiot?" lip philosophized.

ian paused, taking a moment of thorough consideration. he looked lip straight in the eyes as he answered, "if that man is you, then without a doubt."

lip tried to knock ian's cup out of his hand, but failed at his attempt. ian thanked his well-practiced jrotc skills and a lifetime experience of growing up in a house packed with annoying siblings for his victory.

they chatted about the robotics classes lip was taking, how he got full-time access to one of the labs, and his weird ass roommate who may or may not be gay if ian is at all interested. ian scrunched up his face. after hearing so many horror stories about the guy, ian didn't want anywhere near him. he wasn't that desperate yet.

the second that lip was out of his seat and heading to the bathroom, the beautiful mess that was mandy descended.

"hiiii lip's gay brother," she leaned against the table.

"it's ian," he spun his empty cup in his hands. he couldn't help himself from smiling at her charisma.

"well hi, ian, i just wanted to say sorry if i spooked you earlier. i just had no idea lip's brother would be so cute!"

"his ugly mug's not too hard to beat." ian laughed. "he got the short end of the gallagher stick, literally."

"cute and charming. you're funny, ian gallagher, i like you." she placed her hand on his shoulder for a moment, a movement so soft compared to her rather frantic appearance. "come back here anytime and it's on the house, yeah? i work most evenings after three."

"oh. uh- okay," ian scrambled for words, "thanks."

she squeezed his shoulder once before lip returned with a rather obnoxious entrance.

"ayo mands, stop harassing him!"

ian ducked his head in embarrassment.

"oh, shut up! i'm just clearing your cups," she winked at ian as she left.

mandy was something else. but she was kind and good company. ian could get used to the chill atmosphere over the chaos of the gallagher house anytime. he might just take up her offer.

"you'd think with all the time you spend here, you'd be offered a scholarship or something by now." mandy sipped on her chocolate frappuccino as she laid her feet across ian's lap. he always made sure to come visit during her breaks at least twice a week during the past couple months.

ian shrugged, "guess they only had room for one gallagher."

mandy hit his arm in a way that hurt. lip was fucked if he ever broke her heart.

"does fiona even know that this is where you sneak off to?"

"yeah." mandy's look said she didn't believe him. "well, kinda. she thinks i'm visiting lip, brotherly duties and all."

"yeah? how are those brotherly duties?"

"fuck if i know."

she laughed.

"i still think you should apply here for next fall," she encouraged, "could take some art classes."

"i suck at art."

"chemistry?"

"failed that."

"business?"

"yeah, no thanks."

mandy flipped him off, "fine. botany?

"ya know what? sure." he had always wanted to grow tomatoes.

"really?!"

"heart wants what it wants, mandy. we can't all be psychology brainiacs."

"brains and beauty, what can i say?" she teased. ian laughed, eyes glistening towards his friend. mandy made things better.

"hey," she continued, "there's this concert on the main campus lawn this weekend, you should totally come!"

"isn't that just for students?"

"they don't card, dummy."

"right, right, i knew that."

"sureeee. you in?"

ian mentally checked his work schedule.

"i'm in."

lip and ian strolled into the café a few days later. okay, maybe ian had felt a bit guilty for abandoning his brotherly duties lately, but at least this way he could hang out with both his best friends. well he could have if he remembered the fact that mandy had the day off for her behavioral neuroscience midterm. they had literally spent her previous shift reviewing the terms, he should have known.

ian's couldn't help his face from falling as another blonde barista took their orders, mostly eyeing lip the whole time.

"hi lip," she smiled a little too sincerely, "what can i get for you today?"

ian had ordered something new at the recommendation of the blonde and he was not a fan. and to make matters worse, he had to actually pay for the atrocity that he wouldn't even be able to finish.

"so how's your little coffee dates with mandy?" lip asked over his cup.

ian nearly choked on his god-awful americano. "how'd you know?"

"please. she's obsessed with you. every time i see her, it's 'ian this,' 'ian that,' 'ian might apply here in next year.'"

"oh."

"yeah, oh. when were you gonna tell me?!"

“it’s all mandy’s idea, i’m not even sure i want to,” ian muttered, refusing to make eye contact.

“dude, i’ve literally shared a room with you since the day you popped out of monica’s wretched womb, you think I can’t tell when you’re lying?”

okay maybe ian had been getting increasingly more excited about the idea of attending school and actually learning things that he wants to learn. something that might actually lead him somewhere real since rotc was looking more and more like a poor man's fantasy the more that he thought about it.

“I was gonna tell you, swear on it.” and he was. once he convinced himself that lip wasn't going to straight up laugh in his face. but the look in his eye seemed genuinely supportive.

“mhm, i gotta catch my english lit class," lip stood up, swinging his tattered tan backpack across one shoulder. he patted ian's shoulder in his big brother ways, "don’t be a stranger, yeah?”

“yeah, yeah for sure! have fun learning a language you already know!” lip flipped him off at his smartass remark.

soon after, ian stood up to return his drink to the counter, the anxiety from the conversation making him entirely lose whatever appetite he might have had. plus, it wasn’t the same here without lip or mandy. he just wanted to be wrapped up in a cocoon in his own bed. but that was so far away. maybe he could catch an early ride—

thump.

ian crashed into a guy’s sturdy body.

the remnants of his shitty drink spilled in an americano nightmare over both of them, ceramic pieces shattering on the floor in a truly horrific manner.

ian yipped and the other man let out a grunt of irritation.

they were fucking soaked. well, at least the coffee wasn't hot? ian tried justifying the situation, but, nah, this was bad.

"shit! i'm so sorry, lemme," ian reached out and the shorter man flinched away.

they were now far enough apart that ian got a good look at him. a leather jacket.. now covered in ian's drink -- shit. and shockingly piercing blue eyes that lingered too long on ian's before his cheeks turned a shade of pink that made ian's stomach flutter.

he might have seemed cold if he didn’t make ian feel so warm.

"it’s cool, man. i gotta go, uh," and he walked out of the café without looking back.

fuck.

ian smelled like coffee the entire train ride to the back of the yards. he laid in his bed regretting his entire life.

no mandy. no lip. no dignity.

the day of the concert that mandy had invited him to rolled around. ian wouldn’t admit it, but he was nervous to spend a coffee-less evening with mandy, their entire friendship built inside that one room. his little bubble of safety was bursting.

well, to be honest, the bubble had burst the moment that his disaster of a coffee was spilled onto one of the most ridiculously pretty guys that he's ever seen. every time he closed his eyes, he remembered the guy’s face shift from hostile to something else. he was torn between wanting to know the his name and also on never seeing him again in fear that he would simply pass away of embarrassment.

hopefully mandy hadn't heard about it. they may not have been friends for a long time, but he already knew that she would never let him live it down.

"hey ian!" her familiar voice called. that sounded promising.

his face fell with relief as he finally spotted her at the corner. she embraced him in a warm hug before pulling back and giving him a once over.

"huh, could have sworn you'd still have coffee behind your ear or something after the description karen gave me of your little disaster the other day." she smirked, quite literally double checking behind his ears as they turned hot under her gaze.

"ugh, fuck, how much did she tell you?" he itched his forehead and scrunched up his nose.

"oh, calm your tits, it's funny as fuck." she giggled, punching his arm in a way that still unintentionally hurt.

"whatever. are you excited for the concert tonight?"

their reunion conversation lulled eventually, and ian noticed that they weren't necessarily standing alone.

no. fucking. way.

just his luck, if he was being honest. he probably deserved this.

there he stood. the man that has plagued his dreams the past few days. in a light wash jean jacket that was a little tight on the biceps, leaning casually against the wall, kicking the pebbles on the ground with his boot.

"uh, what's he doing here?" ian gestured towards the victim of The Coffee Incident.

“what, you know him?” mandy asked, walking them towards him.

“vaguely.” if that wasn’t the understatement of the year.

"huh. i didn’t think my idiot brother had any friends."

brother? how did ian not realize she had a brother?

"what, did you think i was going to babysit you all night? i can't let everyone here thinking you're my boyfriend, no offense or whatever, but you're in good hands!" she kissed his cheek, clearly not helping her own not-looking-like-her-boyfriend rule.

ian eyed said brother's good hands only to see the faded letters of FUCK U-UP on them. oh.

mandy pushed ian over to her brother, "ian, mickey. mickey, ian," she introduced before pushing and shuffling her way through the crowd of college students to find herself someone’s cheap ass fruity alcohol to mooch off of.

mickey. ian's brain repeated over and over, a chime against the murmuring sea of voices they found themselves enveloped by.

"nice jacket," ian pointed out, an awkward attempt to converse before shoving his hands back in his pockets.

"it's my second favorite." the corners of his mouth lifted like there was more to the statement. ian took the bait, as if he could resist.

"what's your first?"

"first is still airing out the fuckin’ coffee smell," he smirked as ian groaned. "oh c’mon, man, don't go crying over spilled milk."

how could he not? on the bright side, he didn’t seemed to hate ian for it.

“if it was anyone else,” mickey drawled, “they’d have to get a beat down for it.”

“why do I get a free pass?” ian mused.

“well, you’re mandy’s friend, right?”

“yup,” ian tried to suppress his disappointment. he really did. but fiona always told him he wore his heart on his sleeve.

“yeah, that ain’t why, though,” his eyebrows waggled suggestively and ian nearly felt his heart drop out of his ass.

ian blessed whatever coffee god was out there for sending him both mandy and the beautiful man in front of him.

“you wanna go listen to the band?” ian nodded his head towards the stage with passionate players jumping around like they were playing lollapalooza or some shit.

“lead the way, stud, just try to keep your drinks off of me this time,” mickey knocked into ian’s own flannel covered shoulder.

yeah, ian couldn’t believe his luck. maybe karma was finally on his side.

—

mandy smirked at her brother and best friend not-so-subtly checking each other out over the course of the night, bopping their heads to the music and downing whatever free booze they could get their hands on.

she hoped that adding mickey to the equation would be enough incentive to convince ian to stick around. things were better when he was near.

the way that ian followed mickey around like a lost puppy with that dopey moon-eyed look, it seemed like her hopes would come true.

and when both ian and mickey strolled into the café to come visit her at work the next week, mickey in his worse-for-wear leather jacket and ian in borrowed denim, she thanks the coffee gods for her luck.

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depressedstressedlemonzest · 2 years

Text

The Upside

Mickey Milkovich just got out of prison, just got kicked out of his shitty studio apartment, and his son's mother Svetlana doesn't want him staying with them. All Mickey wanted to do while he was in prison was get out. But now that he's out he doesn't know what to do.

When he goes to apply for a janitorial position he mistakenly goes to the interview for a life axiliary for some guy named Gallagher

Ian Gallagher was injured as a result of a bipolar manic episode, and now he's confined to a wheelchair with C7 quadriplegia. He tried to commit an act that would finish the job the accident started, but his sister Fiona rushed him to the hospital. Now Fiona and Lip are insisting on Ian getting a caretaker.

When a rude foul mouthed beautiful man comes to the interview Ian feels the first stirs of life he had felt in a long time.

Read HERE

#The upside #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #quadriplegic Ian Gallagher #caretaker mickey milkovich #bipolar ian gallagher #mentions of suicide attempt #alternate universe #kid yevgeny milkovich #mickey is a parent in this one #mickey milkovich and yevgeny milkovich #even though i limit what i write with them #it drives the plot #the plot being ian and mickey are gonna fall in love #Ian Gallagher has a crush on Mickey Milkovich #mickey milkovich has a crush on ian gallagher #ian gallagher is in a wheelchair #mickey milkovich being an asshole #slowish burn

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gallavichfanficlibrary · 3 years

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Love your blog! Recommend any lesser known WIP?

Hey, thank you a lot! :) There are so many amazing WIPs being written right now that deserve more attention, we wish we could list them all, but here are some of our favorites right now:

Apartment 4A - Roommates AU. Two years after his diagnosis, Ian is finally stable. When the chaos of the Gallagher home gets to be too much, he decides to move out. He answers a roommate ad, and gets more than he bargained for.

Meet the Neighbors - Post S11, outsider POV. Welcome to the West Side, where the residents of one particular apartment complex don't quite know what to think of their new South Side neighbors.

There Are Places You Belong - Post S11. Ian and Mickey adjust to the West Side and grow closer in their second year of marriage.

Cadmium & Carbon - After spending several years on self-destruct, Ian is finally stable and healthy, and living with someone who he believes saved his life. Mickey is an emerging watercolor painter with a complicated past, who is building a reputation in the art scene of Chicago.

We Are Made of Star Stuff - S1 gap-filler. Born out of desire to know how the boys reach the level of closeness that has Ian running to Mickey's when Monica shows up.

You'll never see us again - Ian navigates life inside a beautiful boarding school in rural America where he had been fed, clothed, and raised since as long as he could remember. Things begin to fall apart when he grows older and starts to question the truths he'd been told -- about himself, his friends, and what their purpose truly is.

the things we carry - Post S11. It’s not in the place he’d always envisioned himself settling down - hell, it’s not even a place he can picture them staying long-term. But it’s a place he’ll share with the man he loves, with the one person he can’t picture a life without, and that’s something.

Get Better One by One series - Post S10 canon divergent series exploring Ian connecting with Clayton and Ian and Mickey navigating married life.

When Life Gives You Lemons - Mickey has borne witness to the unfortunate consequences of dating a Gallagher many times - and he wants no part in it. As fate would have it, just as he takes a job for the newly married Fiona, her younger brother Ian is discharged from the Army. (probably abandoned)

Under Lock and Key - Ian gets assigned to the late-night shift in his college’s housing department, providing spare dorm keys to his fellow students. Mickey needs his job at Kimball University to provide for his siblings and cousins. All-nighters. Microbiology. Silly bets. Baseball cards. Fifteen weeks under lock and key.

Undead Agents of Chaos - Ian is fourteen when he discovers a comic book series called Undead Agents of Chaos. It’s going to take years before he’ll know what it’s like to lose a heart. First, he has to find out how it feels to have it beat out hard against his ribcage as he stands on the corner of a street, having just produced the most embarrassing sound of his life. It all starts with an unlikely friend.

They’re all worth a try! Happy reading <3

#wip #favorites #au #canon divergent

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dramaticviolincrescendo · 3 years

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Okay, what are your thoughts on Ian's relationships? With his family, his boyfriends, and Mandy (since I think that's the only friend he's had)

Oh, no. Ohhhhhhhh, no. Now you’ve done it. You’ve asked about my dear, darling favorite character on the show. My love for one Ian Gallagher runs deep, which means this answer is going to run super long. The good, the bad, and everything in between—Ian Gallagher lives rent free in my brain and always will. I derive so much satisfaction from seeing Ian interact with other people, in whatever capacity that might be. I admire and aspire to the compassion he has shown for others over the years, even and perhaps most especially those who arguably haven’t earned it. He tries so hard to be good to people, and seeing their love for him manifest when he’s reached such lows where he can’t even fathom why the love of his life would want to be with him forever? That’s powerful.

So, yeah. I said I could write essays on these characters, and that’s exactly what you’re about to get: five hours and 6k words’ worth of my thoughts. (I am so sorry. There will be text walls.)

Let’s dive into Ian’s many and multifaceted relationships—his family, his friends, and his romantic pursuits.

Ian and Family

Ian told us where he stood on this in the very first season, and it set the standard for his character for eleven years to come. Faced with a prospect that others in his position could only dream of—not being Frank’s son and having a wealthy father with a functional, prosperous lifestyle mere miles away—Ian refused to buy into it. He refused to do what might have been objectively better for his future by seeking a relationship with Clayton. In that household, he would have had access to a better public school, more financial resources, a tutor to help him where he was struggling, and less urgency for him to work so that he could enjoy being a kid. When he got sick, he would have had access to better healthcare, too. Perhaps he would have had a better shot at West Point from that background than he did at home. But that’s just it: home was with his family, and he was very clear that they didn’t live in that nice house. All he wanted—all he wanted—was to be with his brothers and sisters. He has never referred to them as only half-siblings or half-cousins; he has never even used the words, “you’re not my dad,” on Frank. That’s his family, the people he loves most in the world, and he’s always been at his best when he’s with them and at his worst when he’s not. Let’s look at each of them:

1. Frank: It is so striking to me that Ian doesn’t appear to hold the outright contempt for Frank that Fiona, Lip, and Debbie have exhibited at different points over the years. Aside from the handful of instances where they’ve gotten into physical altercations (which Frank always initiated) and kicking him out of the house on occasion, Ian is simply indifferent to him. But there are these moments, these brief glimmers of mutual attachment and loyalty, if those are the right words. In the scene where Ian famously doesn’t count to three before using the pepper spray on him, Frank starts saying how his New Gallaghers weren’t his real kids—that Ian is his real son, and Frank is his real father. It’s a passing thought uttered while trying to manipulate his way into the house that neither of them think much of, nor does the audience…until you remember that biologically, Frank isn’t his father, and he certainly hasn’t behaved like one either. Ian has more right than anyone to comment on that, but he doesn’t because Frank is his father. He’s the father that Ian idly hoped wouldn’t come to his wedding yet sat joking about with Debbie rather than getting pissed off that he was making out with some lady in front of everyone. He’s the father who sat at the table with them eating breakfast in 11x03 and claimed Mickey was the man in their relationship without Ian saying a word to him about it, and who Ian saw no issue with taking Franny to school when no one else could. In s4, as far removed from his family as he’d been for a while, Ian still went straight to the hospital when he heard that Frank was at death’s door. We focus so much on his attitude towards Monica because of how obvious it was that we frequently miss these tiny moments and their implications. It would take an awful lot of patience, compassion, and love not to write Frank off completely after all he’s done. Not necessarily our standard definition of love between a son and his father, perhaps, but a loving soul.

2. Monica: I have actually written a pretty lengthy post about his relationship with her because while their shared mental illness definitely plays a role in his feelings toward her, that grew complicated far earlier than his diagnosis. The first time we meet her, we see that he has a visceral reaction to news of her presence. He runs. When Ian can’t process strong emotions, that’s what he’s done in the past. I happened upon an interview Cameron did just after the end of s1 where he mentioned something I had already been thinking: Ian’s age when Monica left is extremely important. He was a kid in s1, but one who could roll with the punches, sometimes literally. She left them two years before that. Ian would have been in middle school, roughly as old as Debbie was when she still called Frank “daddy” and forgave him for everything he did. It’s an awkward age that once again set Ian in something of a danger zone—too old to accept an excuse or no explanation at all, but not old enough to process the situation in a healthy way. And then she’s back all of a sudden with no warning. Ian doesn’t cry like Debbie, and he doesn’t typically get explosively angry like Fiona. He can’t deal, so he runs. He hangs back. He only speaks when he has to and compartmentalizes: Monica wants to take Liam, and they need to stop her. It doesn’t have to be about her leaving. They have a goal—he can focus on that. And then she’s back a year later, saying she’s here to stay while Fiona seems to take her at her word and Lip isn’t there to ground everyone. Ian tries so hard to behave like Lip would with his biting sarcasm and attempts to stay emotionally distant in a way that seemed pretty exaggerated for Ian, but he’s also dealing with a fresh wave of guilt over Mickey going to juvie—and Monica gets it. She’s the only person to acknowledge that he’s in pain and actively try to make it better. She’s the only one who really knows at the time, but that hardly matters. This poor kid, whose mother left him when he still needed her, has her standing in front of him and saying she’s sorry and listening when he speaks and taking him dancing—just the two of them. Embarrassing as it was and harmful as it could have been, she tried to facilitate his dreams when no one else wanted him to go into the military. She was there for him when he went AWOL. She came for him when he was arrested and even wanted to make a place for him in her new life, unrealistic as it was. This goes so much deeper than them both being bipolar. Ian’s comment about her parachuting into their lives in s7 wasn’t about Mickey or her role in them breaking up. He trusted her. He wanted her. He needed her. And she’d convinced him that she would be there—until she left. Over and over again. She was there for him and unintentionally took advantage of how desperately he still needed his mother. She made him keep loving her, and that’s both a blessing that has him crying into a voluminous man’s arms when she passes and a curse that wrecked him more than once.

3. Fiona: The trust these two have for each other cannot be understated. Fiona has discussed things with Ian that she never brought up around any of the other kids throughout the entire series. In the pilot episode, she tells him about feeling needed and takes his opinion on the matter to heart. At the end of the season, he’s the one she talks to about the car because she can trust him to give her an answer even without speaking. In s2, she tells Lip that the two of them are her rocks, and we see that time and time again. That’s part of what makes their falling out over the church hit that much harder: it’s Ian and Fiona. The only time they’d been on the outs in any serious manner up to that point was when Ian was adjusting to his new reality and they were trying to find a balance between sister and caretaker. Otherwise, that bond of trust had never been severed—not until Ian literally sold himself only for it to amount to nothing in the end because she had no idea the lengths to which he’d gone to get that building. That damage gets mended, thankfully, but what a powerful period of time when those two were the only ones who’d never really been at each other’s throats. There is a downside to that trust, though. As I mentioned before, Ian was so responsible and put together when he was younger that Fiona didn’t think twice about his situation with Ned or that he ran away. Not even seventeen yet, and she was telling Debbie that she didn’t like his decision to leave but trusted him. That is one of the things I love about this show—even something like trust that we always prop up as an important factor in our relationships can betray us in the most unexpected ways.

4. Lip: I won’t go into it here, but the relationship they share is something that means a lot to me on a personal level. It’s part of how I knew that Ian would become my favorite character pretty early on. The way he simultaneously admires and envies Lip, loves and is annoyed by him, relies on him and is desperate to pave his own path in the world—what a beautiful and accurate depiction of what it means to be a younger sibling. Lip is the first person to discover that he’s gay and openly accept him for it. (I think what he tried with Karen came from a well-meaning place even if it was horribly, horribly misguided.) Lip is the one who tries to get him into West Point, hate it as he does. He helps Ian when Terry is after him, takes care of him in the aftermath of the wedding when he realizes just how deeply Ian feels for Mickey, searches the whole damn city for him when he finds out that Ian is in trouble, gets him a job, leans on him in his own time of need… He’s not perfect. He slips up, just like Ian does. Some things break my heart, like Lip insisting that he’s earned his own space when his little brother is asking him for safe harbor or Ian thanking him for being his brother outside the prison. But they love each other so much, and I just… I can’t possibly put into words how much I love their dynamic.

5. Debbie, Carl, and Liam: I’m grouping these three together because they’re further separated from Ian in age, so we see a lot of the same trends with them as a whole. Ian loves taking care of people. We know this. We also know that Fiona and Lip don’t typically want him taking care of them—they’re the ones who take care of him when he needs it, specifically Lip. With the younger three, however, Ian can be the Big Brother. He can shake his head in utter bafflement at Debbie’s obsession with holding her breath for two minutes, walk Carl through what he needs to go camping, and promise his baby brother postcards when he leaves. The difference here is that his relationship with them is so much less fraught with conflict. We don’t see him fight with Debbie, Carl, or Liam the way he has with Fiona or Lip. While Ian tends to be the voice of reason during conflicts overall, I think it’s also because he relies on his older siblings in a way that he doesn’t with his younger siblings, and the latter don’t tend to rely on him as much as Fiona or Lip as well. There’s a lack of tension in most of their interactions growing up because that pressure isn’t there. Perhaps this is where Ian’s age and standing in the family is a bit more beneficial: young enough to have people he can rely on while too young for anyone to really rely on him for more than his share of the squirrel fund.

Ian and Friends

I’ve seen it mentioned that Ian (and Mickey) not having more friends is bad or lazy writing. I tend to believe that that fails to take something into account that, admittedly, most of us don’t really have to think about: having friends is a luxury. It requires time and effort to cultivate friendships, especially lasting ones. As a kid, Ian spent a lot of his free time working or helping to manage one family crisis after another. Going AWOL, losing his health, struggling to acclimate to his illness, trying to find a new career path, spiraling into the Gay Jesus movement, going to prison, adjusting once again to normal life, getting married, a pandemic… I’m sure he’s had plenty of acquaintances over the years, but having a family to support and constant upheavals would have made it extremely difficult to really forge strong relationships with them. I think that’s part of what makes his relationship with Mandy so special and valuable to him: she’s sort of the same way.

When we met Mandy in s1, she had other friends. We saw her meet up with them and go shopping; she told Ian a story about how one was mad at her for not sharing her make-up. As the trauma in the Milkovich household reached its zenith for her in s2 and she started thinking seriously about getting out of there, we saw those friends fall by the wayside—all except Ian. He saw her and let her see him early on. That’s a level of trust and respect that nobody else in their neighborhood would have displayed, certainly not to her. But then there’s this guy who defended her against their creepy, perverted teacher and treated her like a human being, not an object. It’s no wonder she developed an obvious, unrequited crush and sought physical comfort from him occasionally. It’s no wonder she tried to repay the favor by giving Mickey a hard time in s3 and s4, misguided and rather uninformed as we know it was at the time. (It’s also no wonder that she went for the closest Gallagher to Ian, either, but that’s for another meta.)

And Ian… Ian is loyal to a fault. We have watched Ian cut out his own heart and let the blood drip down his arm to pool on the floor at his feet if it would make a damn bit of difference for the people he loves. Like Fiona and Lip, Mandy immediately accepted him for who he is and suggested an arrangement that would protect him as well as benefit her. That is enormous where they came from. To him, that had to feel like the ultimate sign of friendship: he could trust her with a part of him that he hadn’t even entrusted to most of his family yet. From that point on, she was on the List of People Ian Gallagher Would Do Anything For. Finding out about Terry and what had happened? He held a bake sale, of all things, to fundraise for her. Seeing that his brother—his best friend—was treating her like garbage? He put him in his place. Her boyfriend was beating her? He brought her home and made it his goal to find a safe place for her to stay, even if it ultimately didn’t work. She was going to move away from all of her meager support with that boyfriend? He didn’t just rally his own arguments—he brought in outside help with Lip, who he thought might tip the scales. It’s usually just a saying that true friends will help each other hide a body, but Ian literally tried to do that. Lucky for him, he has a good head on his shoulders and used it.

No, Ian doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends. We’ve seen that he has spheres of influence, if you will, and acquaintances that he can call upon when he needs them. (For example, the guys that helped with the preacher.) However, Ian has always struck me as a “quality over quantity” type of person. Being a soldier or an EMT isn’t lucrative, but they’re meaningful for someone who sees them as vehicles for helping people. Seeing more parts of the world than just Chicago has appealed to him in the past, but he seems perfectly content to carve out a spot for himself right here at home. Having only three best friends—Lip, Mandy, and Mickey—doesn’t seem like much of a hardship for him.

Ian and Romantic Pursuits

I hate to say that there were five, but from Ian’s perspective, there were. So, let’s talk about all five. Even though…there weren’t five. There was only one. We’ll save the best for last.

1. Kash: The first of Ian’s perceived romantic pursuits that really wasn’t. I hope it goes without saying that I hate this man with the passion of a thousand burning suns. I hate him so much. However, their interactions taught me a whole lot about how kind and compassionate Ian really is—and how naïve. Of course, he would believe that Kash loved him. The man was buying him all sorts of expensive gifts, and that’s what we see on all the commercials and in so many movies, isn’t it? Grand gestures of affection through expensive gifts. Poor as they were, Ian still scraped together the money to buy him baseball tickets and CDs, convinced as he was that that was all part of what you did in a relationship. That desire to do things like a “normal” married couple in s11? Yeah, that starts here. Ian has always been a planner, and he’s always bought into certain stereotypes. We can see that here. What we can also see is Ian’s compassionate, kind, loving soul. He cares so deeply for other people, even ones that he doesn’t know very well, especially if they are living in circumstances that mean something to him. (For example, the mentally ill woman they tried to help at work and the shelter kids whose situations were so similar to Mickey’s.) Kash being a closeted gay man living in misery with a wife he didn’t love and two children he never meant to have clearly tugged at Ian’s heartstrings. Even after everything that happens, even though Ian behaves as though they’re awkward exes who just happen to work together, he still covers for Kash. He gives him that head start and takes it upon himself to break the news to Linda that he’s gone. He defends Kash to Lip when the latter finally says exactly what we all know: he was a pedophile who deserved to rot in prison for what he did. As with Fiona’s trust, Ian’s loving soul, compassionate heart, and desire for love outside his siblings are virtues that have done him harm in the past. This is one such instance.

2. Ned: The second of Ian’s perceived romantic pursuits that really wasn’t. To be honest, I don’t believe that Ian would even characterize it that way. He seemed very aware that Ned was a distraction from his problems—from Mickey being in juvie, Monica falling into a depressive episode, the money in the squirrel fund being gone, Lip moving out, losing his shot at West Point, and getting denied for service due to his age. Again, though, Ian has always wanted to feel valued, and this rich dude was letting him stay in a fancy hotel room with anything he wanted readily available. This (disgusting predator) guy was giving him attention and a distraction with no strings attached. Then the complications roll in, and he’s once again faced with being the mistress to a closeted, married man. The difference here is that he’s not comfortable with it. He tries to tell Fiona twice, which is enormous for Ian when he has never been very good at communicating if it means burdening others with or even merely facing his own problems. But he tries to tell her. He rejects the GPS unit and tells Ned that he has a boyfriend, boxing him into a strictly sexual arrangement. (This, unfortunately, makes sense. It aligns with how Fiona viewed things: where Jimmy was concerned about it, she told him that it was “just sex.”) He is also visibly embarrassed to admit to Lip and Fiona what has been going on with Ned. By that point, Ian is a year and a half older and, while still scarred and warped in his views because of Kash, perhaps a bit wiser. Emotionally, he kept Ned at arm’s length most of the time. He used Ned not just as a distraction, but as a way to galvanize Mickey into taking their relationship a step forward. But Ian is still Ian, and Ian is compassionate to a fault. Ned played that card by asking if he could have a little understanding for a man whose life was falling apart. Sure, he can. He’s Ian, the Gallagher too empathetic for his own good at times. We know how that spirals out of control. It just goes to show that even when Ian was trying to maintain some emotional distance, his heart is simply too big and his perceptions too heavily impacted by the grooming he’d experienced with two different people by then, and so he [SPOILER ALERT] still feels enough of a connection to Ned after all these years to be mildly bothered that he passed away.

3. Caleb: The third of Ian’s perceived romantic pursuits that really wasn’t. Ian’s relationship with Caleb strikes me as being similar to what he had with Ned. While more age-appropriate, Ian was very much using Caleb, just as Caleb was using him. That’s why it was so easy for both of them to walk away. Ian was in a difficult spot when they met. He was grateful to the firefighters who saved his life, but he had also just saved someone else at a moment when he was perhaps at his absolute lowest. That’s what he’s always wanted, isn’t it—to be a bit of a hero and help people? So, he’s understandably drawn there, first out of gratitude and then to be surrounded by very attractive gay firemen who helped people, saved his life, and invited him to be part of a function they were holding. But he made himself pretty clear from the start: he was interested in sex with Caleb. That was the draw. He still hasn’t come to terms with being bipolar and losing Mickey, but Ian has never not been with anyone for any extended length of time. That’s just who he is: he’s always sought some level of outward validation—from the army, Kash, Monica, Mickey, and so many others. We’re seeing him struggle with that now as he deals with the opportunities available to him as a mentally ill ex-con felon. So, he pursues Caleb as a distraction just like he did with Ned, only Caleb is a predator in his own right and can smell that his interest is coming from a place of weakness. He immediately (and initially unintentionally) preys on Ian’s desperate need for structure and order by insisting on a traditional date where Ian is very much out of his element and even goes so far as to instruct Ian on how to be intimate. It’s no wonder he mentions Mickey in these moments, as Mickey never wanted him to change, and Ian leans heavily (even slightly hyperbolically) into the fact that Mickey wasn’t a paragon of order and stability like Caleb outwardly appears.

And I think why Ian puts up with it so long—being taught like a child, being used to upset Caleb’s parents, being paraded in front of his friends to make them jealous—is because he was getting something out of it too, just like with Ned. A stable place to live when their home ownership was in flux, a place away from his family when they weren’t providing the support he needed as he adjusted to his disorder, someone who validated his desires to help people regardless of their ulterior motives, and a physical distraction from his own problems. All of these parallel his relationship with Ned very closely. It was never going to last, of course. Ian is a strong person who temporarily forgot how strong he was because he forgot who he was, and Caleb didn’t want to be cared for—he wanted a project, like all of his sculptures. Being a project, being something that others see as needing to be fixed? That’s a hard no for Ian. It always has been. There’s a moment I love later in their relationship where Caleb tells him to turn off the lights when he goes out and lightly reprimands him for leaving one on the day prior. Ian is in a better place at that point, having regained a lot of his sense of self, and stares after him with indignation at being treated like a kid. He’s then lied to and cheated on, but I think that to mention those things to Caleb when they break up is to admit weakness on his own part—that he stuck with Caleb knowing that he was being mistreated, and Ian is not one to be called a victim. So, while we know from his discussions with Lip and Sue that the cheating and distrust bothered him most, he merely focused on Caleb lying about his sexuality, which removed a lot of the emotion from the situation—just like he did with Ned. It ultimately turned out to be a bad move since Caleb, being a skilled predator, made him question even his own sexuality in return, but we’re starting to see that Ian isn’t here to be someone’s toy anymore. Not an older, married man like Ned, but definitely not anyone his age either. I’m glad this pseudo-relationship happened because it showed Ian how strong he really was and that he could be in control of his own life. Sure, it destabilized him a little in the aftermath, but he worked through it. He leaned on his family, specifically Lip, who has always been his rock without the blurred lines that Fiona represented between sister/mother-figure/caretaker. Caleb is a garbage person, but Ian was the one who pulled the treasure from the trash, not him.

4. Trevor: The fourth of Ian’s perceived romantic pursuits that really wasn’t. Trevor is perhaps the first relationship where we don’t see Ian dive in. Whether that’s because of his confusion over Trevor’s gender identity or the fact that he was really beginning to fully mature as an adult by that point (ostensibly finishing his education, getting a career, being fully self-sufficient, etc.), he tried to take his time and not jump right in. They hung out, talked around the neighborhood, and yes, engaged in some casual intimacy at the club. Again, Ian might not be in a full relationship, but he’s never without someone for long. At that point in the series, all he was missing was a relationship when it comes to traditional, “normal” goals for people to have. But Trevor posed a situation he’s never been in before since, while gay himself, Ian has never been very interested in activism or engaging in the LGBT community. It’s just not in his culture or environment, so to be faced with someone he’s interested in that challenges a lot of his views of gender and sexuality is something he takes his time with. Unfortunately, Trevor is younger than him and not quite as mature, not quite as experienced. He tells Ian he has plenty of friends and doesn’t need another, which is an ultimatum that has never really sat very well with me personally because I’m generally of the mind that if a person needs time and you really care for them, you’ll let them have that time. I’m not unsympathetic to Trevor: he’s been burned before and has his own trauma stemming from responses to his identity, so it makes complete sense for him not to be patient in this regard. He shouldn’t have to be—but then, Ian shouldn’t have to rush into anything he’s not 100% certain he wants either. That’s exactly what he does, though, because Ian does for others without thinking of the implications for himself a lot of the time. They make great friends, but they don’t make great partners. Trevor treats Ian similarly to Caleb in that he’s a bit of a project. Trevor educates him on the LGBT community and incorporates him into his ventures for the shelter without ever really showing much interest in Ian’s life or family, which suits Ian just fine because for as interested as he is in helping with the shelter and as attracted to Trevor as he is, he seems to know they’re not compatible. Ian, who has been having sex since he was far too young, takes a step back from it when they run into compatibility issues. (And pushes back on the pressure to bottom with some of his own—neither of them were in the right on that.) He doesn’t ask much about Trevor’s family or try to be part of his personal life. They sort of embody the “friends with benefits” stereotype: they hang out, they have sex, and that’s really all there is to their relationship.

The reason Ian doubles down on trying to make it work isn’t because there was a future for them before Mickey broke out. It’s because he thinks he’s lost Mickey forever, he knows he’s lost Monica forever, and he’s not going to get the support he needs from his family when they couldn’t stand Monica and Fiona told him what he already knew to be true, namely that Mickey being an escaped convict would destroy everything Ian worked so hard for if he got involved. So, he does what Ian does. He needs that distraction—he needs to run from these strong emotions he can’t process, so he bottles them up and unfairly hopes that Trevor will provide some of that comfort after cheating on him with Mickey. (Had Mickey been released, I think they would have broken up. Instead, that was the first match Ian lit, but certainly not the last.) Now, the thing is, Trevor said at the start that he didn’t want to be Ian’s friend. He’s also younger and less mature in a relationship, which means he threw the concept of love out there prematurely, just like Ian thought what he had with Kash was love. The death throes of their relationship were a back and forth where Ian was spiraling and seeking comfort, and Trevor was providing some while keeping their relationship pretty amorphous. (Were they exes? Were they friends? Were they people who shared interests and danced around each other? Were they going to get back together? They never officially broke up—it fizzled and resurged, then fizzled for good.) Ultimately, whatever it was that they had couldn’t survive Mickey, Monica, or Gay Jesus. Trevor wasn’t prepared to deal with a full-blown manic episode, and based on his hands-off approach with involving himself in Ian’s life even before the Mickey-shaped bomb got dropped on them, it doesn’t seem like he really wanted to anyway. He did what he’s always done: prioritized his shelter, which I’m not deriding in the slightest. By that point, Ian was too far gone to care that he disappeared anyway. Had the situation been different and he was getting the support from his family that he needed, it doesn’t seem like he would have cared much there either.

5. Mickey: Finally. Only took over five thousand words to get here. I’ll preface this with something that anyone who knows me from other fandoms is already well aware of, namely that I don’t do romance. Ever. Never been interested. The relationships I’ve always been most passionately interested in are platonic ones, especially “found families” and siblings, which is probably obvious from the other five thousand words here. Ian and Mickey are the first relationship I’ve actively shipped or written for in a fandom. They’re the first I’ve been invested in to this extent. As such, one of the biggest pet peeves I had when I first joined this fandom was the saying, “Ian fell first, Mickey fell harder.” These two wonderful dumbasses face planted on the concrete in front of the Kash and Grab in s1 and never recovered. I could go on forever about these two, but that particular wall of text would probably be too daunting for even the most avid Gallavich stan to traverse, so I’ll keep it fairly brief. As we can see above, Ian has a very strict sense of what he “should” want in a partner. Someone who is moderately successful in their chosen field, makes enough money to at least live comfortably, and typically does something that helps other people (a doctor, a fireman, a youth counselor). These aren’t passionate people. They’re not men who operate on instinct the way most of the people in his life have always had to by virtue of their social standing. They have life goals and opportunities that he envies, and Ian has a great deal of compassion for them when they hit a roadblock or things don’t work out. The amazing dichotomy of Ian Gallagher is that he straddles a line most people can’t between the rough neighborhood that has instilled in him all of his values/behaviors and the middle-class mentality of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and aspiring to more. Ian has always aimed for what Lip said wasn’t possible for poor people: being successful without having to scam or steal. But as I said way back at the beginning of this manifesto, the South Side is his home. His family is his family. And none of the people he’s been with personify the South Side quite like Mickey—they don’t personify home like Mickey.

And I think that’s where the initial draw for Ian is. (I’m going to focus on Ian’s side since he’s who your question focused on.) The other guys look great on paper, and Ian’s brain says that that’s what he should aim for. We know better, though. We know that Ian has an enormous heart that belongs first and foremost to his family and their home. His heart says that this person—this dirty, rude, mean, violent person—is home. His heart says this person is everything about himself that he denies having, just like Ian was everything about Mickey that the latter declined to openly acknowledge for so long. I don’t like relationships built on “making each other better.” I really don’t. The wonderful thing about this is that it’s never been that way. Ian didn’t change Mickey. He’s exactly who he’s always been, but he’s grown past the fear of his own emotions and Terry’s response to them. He’s still a thief, a con artist, violent, and rude. Mickey didn’t change Ian either. He’s still rigidly conforming to certain stereotypes of what he thinks he should want, seeking structure (to his own detriment at times), and not a great communicator. The point for them is that they complement each other, not that they make the other a better person—not even that they bring something out of each other that wasn’t already there. That’s what Ian’s other relationships did. They made him shave off his edges so that he could fit a square peg into a round hole, and that’s not happiness. It’s simply what he thought he was supposed to do—what “normal” people did.

With Mickey, he doesn’t have to worry so much about what is normal or acceptable. He doesn’t have to worry about whether or not his life is objectively “on track,” not until fairly recently. Mickey is the only person he’s ever been with who has accepted him for who he is, faults and strengths alike, without the underlying insinuation that he should be aiming for something else or pretending to be whatever the other person needs him to be in order to care for them. Kash needed an escape—Ian provided it. Ned needed a very specific brand of toy—Ian played that role. Caleb needed a project to feel fulfilled—Ian went along with it for a bit. Trevor needed someone who accepted him as he was but did things his way—Ian did that. To care for Mickey has only ever meant being himself because all Mickey ever really needed was him. Mickey didn’t need an escape from his home—his relationship with his family is more complicated than that. Mickey didn’t need to be saved from his upbringing—it’s what made him the person Ian fell in love with and who he is happy to be. Mickey didn’t need someone to change who he is on a fundamental level because unless it is going to get him into trouble and separate them, Ian never wanted him to. (Even then, it’s about what he does, not who he is.) And yes, I’m sure that there’s a level of excitement that Ian finds exhilarating where Mickey is concerned, but I tend to believe it goes a lot deeper than that. What he finds exciting about Mickey is what Mickey embodies about the South Side—about home. About his own upbringing, but also Ian’s. About Frank and Monica, his siblings, school, work, ROTC—existing and surviving in an environment where it’s not guaranteed that you’ll have money to keep the heat on this winter or feed your family. They spent the early seasons living in a constant state of fight or flight. They couldn’t afford not to. And there’s excitement in that. Look at how many people say that the first seasons are their favorite! There hasn’t been a huge shift in the quality or direction of the writing, just the trajectory of the characters. They’ve gotten older, and their problems have been different. It’s not about survival so much of the time anymore, but those are the storylines that excite us. For Ian, that exhilaration in the constant battle of survival in their neighborhood is sewn into the fiber of his being just like it is Mickey’s. He saw his home in Mickey before they truly fell in love, and when that followed, Mickey became home.

In Conclusion

Ian has spent his entire life looking for the “right” path only to realize that it was laid before him: his family, his small circle of friends, and Mickey. I love that that is coming full circle this season, where [SPOILER ALERT] marriage has almost made him regress a bit to that place where there must be a right way of doing things going forward, and slowly but surely, we’re seeing him loosen up.

Good morning. It’s Ian Gallagher loving hours.

#shameless #ian gallagher #it's ian gallagher loving hours #shameless meta #well that took six hours #and I didn't get more writing done #but I feel accomplished

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fangsforfags · 4 years

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Shameless Characters as Songs I like:

Frank Gallagher: Prescription by Mindless Self Indulgence. It talks about needing to take pills, and Frank Gallagher loves pills. Honestly it just suits him. 🤷

Fiona Gallagher: To Build A Home by Cinematic Orchestra. We shoulda seen this coming. I mean come one, she seriously went since she was 6 to keep her family together! She always tried for them and was always there for them--pretty much becoming like a mom, a parent, a "home" to her siblings. She's worked so hard to keep them home from Dcfs whenever they got separated. She was the only person close enough to a parent that cared for the kids, and she deserved so much better. She became a better mom than Monica and a better dad than Frank. She became the parent her siblings needed. She made sure they were safe because they are her life.

Lip Gallagher: Get It Up by Mindless Self Indulgence. I really didn't want to use another MSI song but there's a part in the song that says, "...just whatever you do don't talk about your fucking boyfriend while we're having sex..." And it just reminds me of Lip because there are times where his partner is talking about someone else while they do it and it just makes this song choice for him even more relatable.

Ian Gallagher: Wires by The Neighbourhood. I think this song goes good with Ian because there's a part where the singer talks about giving someone their medicine and I think of Ian. And the whole song reminds me of Ian and his bipolar because "the wires got the best of him," where the "wires" is his mental illness.

Debbie Gallagher: Smack a bitch by Rico Nasty. I was debating on songs because I dislike Debbie by a lot and was debating in using Lily Allen's song "fuck you." But I chose Rico's song because honestly Debbie isn't afraid to throw hands with someone. In s5, she went and beat up Holly and Ellie (for no reason bc Debs is a bitch like that) and fought that homeless lady in s7 over that corner. So, Debs throws hand.

Carl Gallagher: Teenagers by My Chemical Romance. Honestly, Carl is a tough, intimidating, ruthless person who could beat the shit out of you. I mean, even in early seasons Carl was kinda ruthless to people and pets. This songs just works for him.

Liam Gallagher: Cool Blue by The Japanese House. Honestly I see Liam as this song because Liam is this quiet, calm, collected kid and this song is soft and calm. Yes i know it's used in s1 of 13rw, but this song reminds me of Liam. It's just a nice song to listen to and Liam is pretty quiet and he's a nice kid too.

Mickey Milkovich: Mistakes Like This by Prelow. This song gives me closeted!Mickey vibes man. When the singer is pretty much saying how they can't stop thinking of a person but they know they shouldn't get involved, it reminds me of Mickey before he started actually caring about Ian. Because he wanted Ian, but he knew he shouldn't want him because of his dad. So he tries to keep Ian away with the "feelings" and all that shit.

Mandy Milkovich: Not Your Barbie Girl by Ava Max. We know that Mandy doesn't let guys use her. In s2 Mandy tells Lip that after a 3rd time they either figure it out or stop, meaning she wasn't gonna be someone that was used only for sex. She had plans for a relationship, and doesn't let boys control her. She's also held a shotgun to T*rry so respect for that. :)

Veronica Fisher: OMG by Iggy Azalea and Wiz Khalifa. I think this song goes to Ms. Veronica Fisher because nobody can compare to her. She's absolutely beautiful and she knows it. She's a bad ass bitch too and doesn't fuck with anybody that tries crossing her. A. Fucking. Queen.

Kevin Ball: Never Gonna Give You Up- Rick Astley. Haha, get Rick Rolled bitches. ✌😄 nah jk but Kev deserves this song because he's so fucking loyal from loving V and only V, to helping the Gallaghers when they need it. Kevin is a really loyal guy and loves everyone and is a protector for his friends and family. Everyone needs a Kevin in their life. :)

Karen Jackson: Daddy Issues by The Neighbourhood. Yes another song by them, deal with it. But this songs reflects Karen perfectly because her dad did humiliate her in front of a group full of people. He called her a whore and made her think he loved her again. It caused her to fuck up a lot and not care for consequences. But with her dad being a dick and her mom not really being there for her to see her succeed, it fucks you up.

Sheila Jackson: Ms. Jackson by The Outkast. "IM SORRY MS. JACKSON. NEVER MEANT TO MAKE YOU DAUGHTER CRY..." Lol but seriously i see Sheila with this song, well because she's Ms. Jackson. And that part I have quoted makes me think if Lip and Karen. But the song overall makes me think of Sheila. Sheila if you're reading this we miss you and want you back. :(

Yo if you got any songs you think would work better with them just comment! :)

#frank gallagher #fiona gallagher #lip gallagher #ian gallagher #debbie gallagher #carl gallagher #liam gallagher #veronica fisher #kevin ball #mickey milkovich #mandy milkovich #karen jackson #sheila jackson #shameless post

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gallavictorious · 4 years

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Ian wakes with a start, heart a-hammering. Down by the town square the church bell is ringing out midnight, but he knows with a certainty that this isn't the noise which roused him.

Sitting up, he darts a quick glance down at his brothers next to him on the thin mattress; Philip's flat on his belly as always, and Carl's curled up on his side, snoring. Another look tells him that Fiona's fast asleep on the kitchen bench, with Liam in her arms, and over by the fireplace someone – Debbie, for sure – has draped an old blanket over Frank's sprawled form. He must have stumbled home after the rest of them went to sleep, having wasted on liquor what little money he made cheating passer-throughs at cards down in Mr. Ball's saloon. Debbie herself is stretched out on her pallet by the window, red hair a shining gray in the pale light of the moon. Ian frowns. The family's all there, all accounted for and all asleep, so what woke him?

And then he spots the young man standing in the middle of the room. Can't understand how he didn't see him straight away, because he's only three feet away from Ian, dressed in a dirty longcoat and with a scarf loosely wrapped around his neck. His hair is dark, and there's something familiar –

”Mickey?” Ian asks, and as soon as the name spills over his lips he knows that he's got it right. It is Mickey, youngest and wildest and most dangerous of the Milkovich boys. Terror, thug, thief and brawler; his father's son in every way, that's what the old ladies who come to buy their groceries at Mr. Karib's store say; sure to hang before he's one-and-twenty.

He's a year or two older than Ian, and they'd gone to school together for a while, before Mickey was expelled for stealing the milk money again, and for naming miss Jackson a twice-poxed loony. Since then he's been a menace and a cautionary tale, dealing in his father's ill-gotten goods and violence-for-hire whenever he isn't locked up. And now he is here, standing in the middle of the moonlit room, face half in shadow and half-covered in something dark that Ian with a jolt realizes must be blood. It's on his clothes, too, all over them, and Ian should be scared, but he isn't.

In spite of the blood, Mickey doesn't look wild or dangerous now, only young. More boy than man, it seems to Ian, and that is a strange thing, for though slight of build, Mickey Milkovich has always loomed large, the threat he represents so far exceeding his small frame as to completely warp the perception of it. Ian's never noticed how fine his features are before, how straight is his nose, or how beautiful the curve of his eyebrows. (Liar. Liar. Liar. You noticed, every time you saw him, you looked and you noticed, you sick –)

As if roused by the soft call of his name, the boy trains his gaze on Ian and frowns: ”Gallagher? You're the one working down at the darkie's store.” Something odd about his voice – it's too soft, too hesitant. Ian can't make sense of it; focuses on the words instead.

The store, Mickey says, so casual, as if he isn't in there thieving every week, and Mr. Karib daren't do a thing about it, in spite of his wife calling him a coward, calling him all sorts of names. She's bitter about marrying a foreigner, Ian thinks. It was the talk of the town when it happened, but she stood her ground and now she's shamed that her husband doesn't have the guts to stand up to a villain like Mickey Milkovich, and no matter that no one else in this godforsaken town has the guts to either.

”What are you doing here?” Ian manages. ”Did you... are you in some sort of trouble?” All that blood, Mickey might well have killed someone. But why come here, if he had? The Gallaghers have no business with the Milkoviches, not if they can avoid it, not even Frank.

It takes the other boy a moment to answer, and when he does his voice is low, the words slow: ”I think I'm dead.”

And Ian knows that he should splutter and fuss, laugh maybe, and demand to know what sort of sick jest this is – but he knows, too, knows without knowing how, that the other boy is telling the truth.

”What happened?” he asks quietly. Wonders why he isn't afraid, still.

”My father. He saw me – ” The boy cuts himself off, looks away. ”It doesn't matter. He's an evil bastard.”

Ian has no answer for that. If there is such a thing as true evil, as the preacher tells them there is every Sunday (only Ian isn't so sure he believes him, because the preacher speaks of so many sins that really shouldn't be sins at all, for surely a God that is only love can't think of any love as a sin, can he, and he'd ask Fiona, but she's got too many burdens already, and she doesn't need to carry his as well) – but if there is such a thing as true evil, then surely Terry Milkovich is it. They say he burned the Thomases' cottage to ground when they couldn't pay what they owed him, and they say that he doesn't shoot his dogs when they get too old to be of any use, but beats them to death, for the sheer pleasure of it. Looking at the bloodied boy before him now, Ian can believe it, even as his mind shies away from the thought, from imagining Milkovich standing over his son and –

Ian closes his eyes hard. Opens them again. His own father is a drunk and a cheat and a liar, but he rarely as much as slaps any of them.

”Does it hurt?” he asks, and it's a childish question, but the only one he can think to ask.

Mickey shakes his head. ”Nah. Don't feel like anything really. It's not so bad, actually. Quiet.” He looks around. ”Don't know what I'm doing here, though. It was like I was being pulled, somehwere, and then suddenly it stopped, and I was just standing here.” He wiggles his shoulders. ”I still feel it. The pull. Don't think I'm here for much longer.”

He looks straight at Ian, expectantly, as if waiting for him to explain what is the meaning of it all, but Ian's got no explanation to give. Even as he watches, the other boy begins to fade around the edges, somehow becoming a little less solid, a little less there. Ian shrugs, helplessly: an apology. Mickey's shoulders sag impercetibly, and for a second Ian expects him to lash out, but there's no anger in other's face, only resignation.

”Maybe I'll see you again,” Ian offers hastily, for something to offer, and immediately curses himself inwardly: what a foolish thing to say. And yet... And yet, for one fleeting moment, there is a sense of impossible but complete and utter certainty that somewhere, somehow, he will see this wild and angry and broken boy again.

He can't explain why he feels so sure. Can't explain why the thought fills him with relief.

”Yeah, I doubt it.” Milkovich's laugh is a hollow thing. ”Where I'm going no good little Sunday school boy like you will ever follow.”

Ian doesn't tell him that if all he's learned in Sunday school is true, he'll burn right next to the murderers and the traitors and the blasphemers, forever and ever and ever.

”I don't believe in hell,” he says instead, defiantly, and is comforted to realize that it's the truth. Surely whatever comes after this world must be better than the cruelty and fear and grief of this one.

”Good for you,” Mickey drawls, but there is something in his eyes, something for just a moment before he is completely gone that Ian might, if he dared, name gratitude.

And then Ian is alone, with his sleeping siblings and father and the moonlight falling over the empty floor.

---

In the morning, Ian sits over his porridge at the table like a man only half-awake.

”What's the matter with you?” his older brother asks, playfully punching him in the arm. ”Bad dreams?”

Had it been? Ian doesn't know and doesn't answer, but when word comes later that day, just as the sun begins to set and carried by Miss Veronica who heard it from Mr. Ball who heard it from the sheriff down at the saloon, there is no surprise, and – surprisingly – no fear, only a sense of quiet loss so profound that he can't voice even a word of polite astonishment or regret.

He heads out instead, to stand on the little hill behind their cottage, staring at the sunset so long and hard that his eyes begin to tear; staring at the horizon as if to spy beyond it the better world to come.

#gallavich #angst #alternative universe #this was absolutely not what i was intending to write today #i was going to finish my 10x06 missing scenes fic #but then i was cooking dinner and had this thought #and now it's midnight and here we are #i promise that i don't usually write such bleak things #but if i have to suffer this vision then so shall you #tw: character death #fic #my stuff

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dreamylyfe-x · 4 years

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Loving on 10x12: Gallavich!

I don’t think I have much that’s unique to say, but I really have to talk about how good that episode was. On strong community advice I was trying to keep my expectations low. I loved the advance scene... like loved it. But I tried to keep myself in line and decided to be ok with no vows and very little actual wedding stuff. Like maaaaybe they’d do that. Or maybe it would all be hi-jinks and the wedding would be in a montage and nothing much would happen.

But then it was SO MUCH good stuff. Which I want to record now.

* First of all, so much good intra-Gallagher interaction. I feel like this is what the show does best and they do it so little, but it’s always great to see them all together fighting for a common goal. And it was awesome that the goal was a) stop Mickey from committing homicide in broad daylight and b) get Mickey and Ian married.

* We are paying attention to the fact that Ian is bipolar. I will come back to that.

* For the people who wanted to know how the wedding was being paid for, we have an answer: Crime. (I’m ok with this.)

* I love the shot as Carl leaves the bedroom and pushes the door closed behind him, and we see Ian pulling off Mickey’s towel just as it closes. (The grab that proceeded it was nice, too.)

* I’m easy: I’ve fully bought into Sandy and Debbie. I do not like Julia.

* Oh the Sandy tip, it honestly does make sense to me that Mickey would have developed a bond with his lesbian cousin in his super homophobic family. And again: Mickey needs a friend.

* Ok. Complaint. I don’t love the hitting? It’s just not for me. And I’m always like “Ok, it’s the show, this is the dynamic” and then I end up all “But... did it have to happen twice?” or “Did he have to walk UP the stairs to hit him?”

* I do not mind the biting. Feral is feral.

* Because I recall seeing some people being annoyed that Ian said Mickey was prone to murder, I just want to point out that Mickey is pretty prone to murder.

* The second scene with Mickey handcuffed by the washer is one of my favourite scenes of the season. (Wedding scenes are on a different metric.) Kinda drunk and literally being kept on a chain, making a list of what are probably some of Terry’s lesser crimes against him (but just so... petty. So cruel. So very much the acts of a man who just doesn’t care about anyone on any level and must ENJOY making his kids miserable. He has what? Five kids? That’s a lot of halloween candy to steal.) I don’t think Mickey talks that much about what Terry’s done to him to anyone, so seeing him innumerate these events to a relative, who knows all about them, just moved me. And then the “I love you. I LOVE you.” It sounded so similar to the one from 5x12. Like this is essential information Ian needs.

* I also love how Mickey just gives up, honestly. I love it because it means everyone else has to step in to give him what he wants and I’m glad he got to have that experience, right down to Ian complimenting the chairs.

* So much of the time Ian looks so adult and so far from the Ian from the first five seasons, but several times in this episode he was shot in a way where I could really see younger Ian in his face and I loved that.

* Lip, suggesting a plan where Ian might have to watch Mickey marry a woman might not be your most sensitive moment.

* The bow tie scene. Mickey is a hard no on kids. Ian wants them. Mickey immediately becomes a soft yes. That’s on brand.

* They have gay friends! I’m not even talking about the Gay Jesus kids, but the people who turned up before that to make things awkward. Good to see.

* I would not describe myself as a Debbie fan, but I really loved her this episode. Like it’s almost an “all is forgiven” amount of love.

* Speaking of Gay Jesus, I was glad to see Geneva make a comeback, since it appeared that she’d completely abandoned him. And it made sense. I was thinking when he was on Grindr -- shouldn’t someone notice he’s Gay Jesus? Shouldn’t Bryon have, if he’s so politically informed?

Ok. The wedding. So much has been said so well, but I need to obsess about a few little things.

* Ian chose “At Last”. God. It made me feel how much he’s wanted this and for how long. Honestly, even with the years they were apart, did Ian really ever want anyone else? Really?

* Franny is wonderfully accurate in her sloppy flower girl work. That’s what it’s like when the flower girl is four.

* We got the vows. And they’re the traditional ones, which I thought was perfect. It’s hard for me to picture either of them doing more personal vows in front of people.

* I thought Cam was so good here. Ian was so intent and he had that edge of emotion peaking through. And for both of them, I felt like they were saying these words everyone knows, but really making sure the other person heard them. And here's also where I come back to the fact that they uncharacteristically talked about Ian's meds earlier in the episode -- because it really echoes here. They've done for poorer and they've done sickness. And they did it as KIDS, so they really understand what they're promising each other and that just GOT to me.

* I know I have so much company here, but Ian looks SO young when he asks "Now?" and then kisses Mickey like someone is about to take him away from him. And Mickey looks... happy. Eff you, Terry. He's happy. It's so beautiful.

* Ian lifting Mickey's hand up as they walk down the aisle reminds me of the end of a boxing match and I love it, because this has been a fight, people. They fought for it, hard, and they emerged victorious.

* Ok. So. The dance. @fiona-fififi wrote such a great, long piece about this and I will only be a dim echo here, but it was my favourite moment. Wedding stuff gets a different metric and of the wedding stuff, this was the part that got to me the most. They're married. Mickey is dancing with Sandy. Ian and Debbie (the only person to ever be a hero for wearing a wedding dress to a wedding that is not her own) are sitting together and Ian does something so vulnerable. He knows he's the kid who misses Monica the most. He knows he feels the loss in a way the others don't. And it makes sense to me that he says he misses her to Debbie, who has the best chance of getting it -- but it's still a risk. It's a confession and Debbie does what he needs her to do and tells him Monica would have loved this. Which is true. She might have RUINED it, but she would have loved it. She gives Ian permission to be sad, to grieve. And he lets the feelings come up and then he does the thing that always gets to me the MOST with these two. The kisses are great. They have some epic ones. But Gallavich hugs just rip my heart out. They just cling to each other, every time. There is nothing casual about it. And when Ian goes to "dance with his husband" he's actually going to just melt into him. And they bury their faces against each other, and he holds Mickey and they sway it's just... perfect. The song nails it. This, more than anything, makes me feel the love this show managed to create with these two. Which I believe on a level I rarely do. They fit together, they belong together and they really, really earned this. Cue gasping sobs.

* I do not understand how it's light out when they leave. Does this fit with Senior Hour? But ok. Let's go with it. The car was a great piece to give Liam and Frank, they look fantastic in their tuxes and I love how Mickey kinda swings into the car the same way he could swing around under the bleachers. There's so much joy in him.

* The only thing I'm going to say about Lip is the Tami deserves some kind of medal.

* I wrote a whole post about the tattoo, and we first see it when he's out of the shower, but I'm really not kidding about this. The tattoo was something I spent WAY too much time speculating about in my head and I thought it was weird that an actor they once shot wearing only a guitar was constantly so covered up. Plus, probably should have shown with the prison tanks, given the original placement. I support the retconning of this because it keeps the gesture without it being a major distraction.

But that is NOT where that tattoo was!

Now it's over his heart. Awww.

ANYWAY. I loved this. I'm so glad I got on this ship. It's so rare you get something like this in a fandom. So. Don't screw it up, Shameless! Only have to maintain for 12 more episodes. That's all I ask.

I hope it's not too much.

#gallavich #ian x mickey #that was so good tho

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