#maybe im a loner or smth idk

[amugoffandoms]

if I had a nickel for every time a show I've watched had something to do with magic and friendship, I'd have four nickels, which honestly, I'm not that surprised I've watched that many shows with something surrounding that

[scourge-sympathiser]

dont worry abt needing to add anything i just wanna share this idea b4 i forget it but also i dont rlly know any1 who likes warriors so,,,

okay i saw a little animation on utube about fallen leaves and while i was reading up on his wiki it hit me

in outcast, after jaypaw has been having dreams about fallen n his death, n after meeting him while looking 4 the missing kits in the tunnels, fallen asks him to stay but jay declines.

what if, unhappy w/ being forced to be a medcat, and wanting to live his *own* life he accepts? and a similar thing to what happened to holly happens where the cave entrance collapses (whether fallen and jay had smth to do with it or it was just convenient, idk), n everyone thinks that jay died saving these kits. but really hes living his best life in the caves. fallen teaches him how to hunt and fight well, bc the caves are dark, 's not like you can see very well even if you weren't blind.

and jay starts having the dreams where he's jay's wing, back in the ancients time, and its a little different where instead of having a crush on halfmoon he (jay's Wing) had a crush on fallen before fallen died in the caves. and thats why jay brings up the idea to leave to the mountains. and when he ends up back in the present he realizes that he once again has a crush on fallen.

and fallen remembers, or recognizes jay as jay's wing and is like "oh... Oh!" and realizes he also, once again, has a crush. and so jay choses that as his full name. Jaywing.

jay starts walking in dreams and having visions of The Battle, and at this point its been a couple of years at this point, the whole thing w/ ashfur happened and the gathering where holly tells after killing ash happens, and jay finds out through holly's dreams, bc shes projecting her own fears, anger, and insecurities hard while she sleeps. and that really makes jay upset but then he talks w/ fallen and comes to the conclusion that it doesnt matter who his real parents were, bramble and squirrel are still his parents to him.

eventually with the battle looming on the horizon, and rock urging him to go, he leaves the caves. and returns to thunderclan. n fallen can follow him due to his powers, and at first the clan think jay is a rogue or loner, but its dove who has Never seen him before who mentions that he's blind just from observing how carful he puts his paws down that everyone freezes before going "jay???"

and oh mouse dung, hes no longer a grumpy, scrawny medcat apprentice. he's still on the shorter side but he filled out, muscle no one thought he'd have ripples beneath his coat, he's as strong as a *warrior*. and has the skills as one, too. he can hunt and fight as well as the rest of them, its almost like he isn't blind when he's actually in the zone. but he still bumps into things n trips over roots or uneaven ground.

and yeah the Battle happens and he's out there, using his starsight to fight along side fallen leaves, until the battle is won and fallen reunites with his family, and is torn between staying with jay in the caves and actually going where hes supposed to. jay tells him to go, he'll be okay, and to wait for him.

but wait, if cats can be reincarnated and have powers... why can't the tribe of endless hunting and starclan let him properly live where he left off? so hes given another chance and put back into the tunnels with a physical form, and meets jay again and joins him in thunderclan.

idk thats what i have sorry abt rambling!!

ok actually i kinda lov this? im a suckr 4 ghost romance & jay being like ok actually fuck yall........... i would perhapz move the kit thing a little further down the timeline so tht jay is a bit older tho, maybe

like the idea tht part of why fallen asked for him to stay waz a hint of fimiliarity tht just growz & one day he just like... Seez it on jayz face whn he wakez up from a dream about the ancients- or like maybe jay callz him by a nickname from timez long since passed, tht kinda thing? on one hand im like yea on the other the trope of "i like u bcuz u remind me of a dead personi loved" isnt my fav but like a little sprinkle isnt bad

interesting 2 think of wht would happen 2 hollyleaf with her escape into the cavez long since blocked off by both rockz n the truma of loosing a sibling.... like, doez she stay in the clanz? might be fun if she ended up living in the field tht crow & leaf once tried 2 leave thru, but also he awkwardly still being in thunderclan..... lov tht

n well i just Cannot care about the battle i do LOV jaywing coming out of the tunnelz just likle hai guyz whtz up :3 as if he didnt fake his own death.... also the idea of jay using his dreamwalking ability 2 just check up on his family & see how thy r like. Doing

idk about fallen coming back with a body bcuz tht seemz like more thn starclan or endless hunting could do but also it would be VERY VERY weird 4 fallen 2 come back w/ the regular method of being reborn a kit.......... pursonaly i think it would be fun for him 2 stay a ghost but no longer be attached 2 the cave system- instead just exploring & hanging out with jay who can alwayz sense his presence- other catz somtimez catch glimpsez but hez not like. very tangible most timez.... many catz think jay probably just lost it a little in the tunnelz, not tht he rly goez around like hey evry1 herez my ghost make he just talkz 2 himself, laughz at seemingly nothing, tht kinda thing

..... honest 2 god didnt mean 2 add this much im holding myself back, evn,

[satelliteduster]

hi tone. if you were given full script and directing control with an unlimited budget for a horror movie what would you make it about? what kind of themes would you explore?

my entire brain and gut immediately went "WEREWOLF MOVIE" to this BUT i would specifically make it a movie about finding utter pleasure and joy in the experience. so many werewolf flicks make the whole schtick out to be an intense and unpleasant curse like "oh no every full moon i can turn into a giant buff wolf woe is me" FUCK THAT i would have the main character strive to love their status as a werewolf and everything that comes with it: the agility, the adrenaline rush, the heightened senses, the "euphoria of change" (im quoting that one tumblr comic that was like "your memory fails" or smth. that one ruled) and ofc the insatiable hunger & bloodlust <3 werewolf's gotta eat

as for theming i would absolutely love to focus on the double-life aspect of it; the role a werewolf feels that they have to play on both sides of the equation. ive always felt like the subjugation and shame that a werewolf would feel in their day-to-day life would be from the regular people who fear them/demean them/comment on their strange behavior & newfound energy/want them to subdue themselves. and yet, what about when they become a wolf? say they're a pacifist or a naturally caring and conscientious person -- what happens when they deal with that bloodlust, with that desire to consume flesh? they'd be torn between having to play that role of the gruesome, grotesque monster that nobody can control and the weak loner that nobody respects for one reason or another. also also id love adding a sort of recurring "stage-play" motif (kinda like the shadow girls from utena) to accentuate the "playing the role of the monster vs the helpless damsel" motif

"tone this sounds ok but where's the horror" idk maybe its a horror comedy. the scary parts could be when the protagonist gets mauled by a werewolf & transforms for the first time. maybe there's a scene where the og werewolf comes back for revenge and stalks the protagonist, making them paranoid. maybe the protagonist can't sleep at night and they end up seeing the creature out of the corners of their eyes. maybe there's an "under the school" final confrontation between the mc and the beast where they have to navigate a bunch of damp, dark, pipe-laden hallways. maybe

anyway tl;dr "what if you mixed danny phantom with american werewolf in london and made tucker the main protagonist. and also made him a quirky scene girl. or something"

[literalite]

please share ur list now im intrigued

ok here’s why i hate vladislaus straud:

he’s rich. he has a big ass house up on the hill. he probably owns the whole fucking hill actually. hes got that swanky ass path all the way up to his house and he lives there. how much money does that mf have squirreled away?? probably more then enough to pay for every poor person in town. does he do it. no because hes ugly like that

he’s white and old enough to be racist about it. idk how old yall headcanon vlad as but in my head hes old enough to be like the awful boomers we have to deal with but x10 worse. and as mentioned before he lives up on that hill and hes a loner so its not like hes exactly keeping up with the rest of the world. if he saw a person of colour he’d probably kill them on sight.

he breaks into peoples houses and sucks their blood bruh just plant a blood tree or whatever theyre called. hes canonically mclovin that human blood which is so mean like cmon man.. just dont... u kill someone like that but they could have a family or smth...

he literally has the evil trait which validates everything i just said. u can have ur own headcanons about it whatever maybe hes a really nice dude in your head but this is what my head has provided to me

[incredible-dad]

What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man...

Archetype — The Hero  Birthday — February 18, 1970 Zodiac Sign — Aquarius Sun, Aquarius Rising, Cancer Moon MBTI — ESTP Enneagram — type 2: the Helper Temperament — Choleric Hogwarts House — Ravendor Moral Alignment — Lawful Good Primary Vice — Greed Primary Virtue — Charity Element — Earth

Overview:

Mother — Sarah Parr (nee Johnson) (adopted); Jennifer Peterson (birth) Father — Theodore Parr (adopted); Unknown (birth) Mother’s Occupation — primary schoolteacher Father’s Occupation — pastor Family Finances — comfortably middle class Birth Order — eldest Brothers — William Parr (younger, adoptive, blood child of Sarah and Teddy) Sisters — none. Other Close Family — Helen, Violet, Dash, Jack-Jack; i guess that Helen’s parents are his in-laws but he’s not really close to them because Helen is estranged. Best Friend — Frozone Other Friends — other Supers (mostly deceased) Enemies — The American Government lmao Pets — none, their house is way too hectic, but he grew up on a farm so they had animals there Home Life During Childhood — rosy and idyllic for the most part, his parents were wonderfully accepting of his gifts and even though other people in town kind of shunned him a bit, he won them over for the most part eventually. plus, no one really fucked with him because he could toss you into a building. not that he WOULD but  im js he could. He also grew up quite religious as the son of a southern presbaterian pastor. Town or City Name(s) — Smallville, Kansas; New York City, New York; Astoria, Oregon; Riverside, Iowa;  What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — shared with his brother in their little farm house, he wasn’t ever big on decoration or anything, so just whatever his mom decorated it with.  Any Sports or Clubs — no, not officially, he liked to play recreationally, but he wasn’t allowed on any teams because of his powers.  Favorite Toy or Game — loves monopoly, he’s that person that’s really into it and has a whole strategy and everything. He’ll get like MAJORLY competitive and no one really wants to play with him because he takes it really seriously lmao Schooling — his mom was his preschool teacher, and he went to regular rural public school with the same like group of 50 kids up through graduating HS. He got a BA in criminal justice from NYU on a Magick scholarship. Favorite Subject — not really any tbh, not a very studious person, but if he had to choose one he’d probably say science because he finds it interesting. Popular or Loner — he was a loner when his powers first started developing, but by high school he’d practiced really diligently at getting them under control and so he became quite popular after that because he’s very jovial and has a warm personality. Important Experiences or Events — getting adopted, though he doesn’t remember it lol; finding out he had powers; the birth of his brother; getting into NYU; meeting Helen; marrying Helen; joining the NSA; the NSA falling; the birth of Jack-Jack; adopting Violet and Dash Nationality — American Culture — Southern Religion and beliefs — Southern Presbyterian 

Physical Appearance:

Face Claim — David Harbour Complexion — idk white? lmao not super pale, not super dark, no freckles or anything Hair Colour — dirty blond Eye Colour — blue Height — 6’3 Build — stocky and strong Tattoos — none though he always jokes about getting Helen’s name in a heart on his arm Piercings — probably had his ears pierced at one point when he was trying to be #edgy at NYU Common Hairstyle — he’s balding lol Clothing Style — he dresses like a straight white man whose mother dressed him until he went to college and now his wife dresses him Mannerisms — rubs his forehead when he’s frustrated, puts his hands on his hips, crosses his arms, fidgets, sighs when he’s annoyed at you but doesn’t want to say it outright Usual Expression — 

Health:

Overall (do they get sick easily)? — has a very resilent immune system Physical Ailments — none Neurological Conditions — depression Allergies — none Grooming Habits — he wears cologne and shaves and showers, don’t expect much more than that Sleeping Habits — up at the crack of dawn, but not by choice. Grew up on a farm, so it’s just ingrained in him. Can sometimes go back to sleep until like nine, but rarely sleeps in. Is the dad that falls asleep in the recliner watching TV but wakes up if you try to change the channel. Snores. Has to drink a lot of coffee on night shifts. Apparently I have a lot of hcs about Bob’s sleeping habits. Eating Habits — will eat anything, anytime, but Helen’s cooking is his favorite (besides his mom’s) Exercise Habits — eh he’ll go to the gym to keep up pretenses but he has to be really careful, lol. Though, if he doesn’t exercise his strength, it can easily get too amped up, so catch him in the forest chucking trees across the meadows. Emotional Stability — 6; he’d score higher but he has a pretty easily triggered temper. He is easily riled up about things and very passionate, but for the most part he’s pretty jovial and easy to get along with. Body Temperature — runs a little warm Sociability — very friendly, very extroverted, perhaps too friendly, perhaps too extroverted  Addictions — processed sugar Drug Use — none, probably smoked weed in college or something Alcohol Use — not much, will have a few beers with dinner occasionally, but tends not to drink due to his high metabolism it makes it kind of pointless except for the taste and maybe a small buzz if he drinks enough; in college it was a game to see how much it’d take to get him drunk.

Your Character’s Character: 

Bad Habits — not following the rules, being controlling, reacting to situations without thinking Good Habits — loyal, a good communicator when he’s not antsy about things, emotional Best Characteristic — kindhearted Worst Characteristic — obsessive Worst Memory — all the people he’s lost Best Memory — when Jack-Jack was born, when he got married, when he adopted his kids Proud of — his wife, his kids Embarrassed by — his own ineptitude in relating to his kids Driving Style — normal really, not a speed demon or anything; tho he used to be as young person Strong Points — intelligence, friendliness, loyalty Attitude — he’s kind of pessimistic tbh, kind of depressed so he’s always just like *deep sigh Weakness — his brashness Fears — something happening to his family Phobias — lowkey fear of heights Secrets — that he knew about the experiments on the kiddos Regrets — not turning on the NSA faster Feels Vulnerable When — people are pointing out things he has done wrong Pet Peeves — people not listening to him, talking over him, telling him what to do lol Conflicts — his brashness v wanting to take things slow Motivation — to help Short Term Goals and Hopes — none really? Long Term Goals and Hopes — be a good parent, a good husband, and help people Sexuality — straight Day or Night Person — day person, he grew up on a farm Introvert or Extrovert — extrovert  Optimist or Pessimist — pessimist Intelligence — high

Likes and Styles:

Music — dad rock Books — not a biiiig reader, but he does like some history stuff/biographies Magazines — none really Foods — will eat anything but pineapple, but prefers a home cooked meal to eating out Drinks — no preference, will occasionally have a beer w dinner or smth Animals — also no real preference lol Sports — a football fan, will probs get into soccer too, into track bc of dash Social Issues — magick rights, but he’s also Tired Favorite Saying — eh none really Color — Helen’s eyes Clothing — just a regular 50 year old straight man, Helen builds his wardrobe Jewelry — his wedding ring ofc Games — none really, but he’ll get really into playing his kids’ video games with them Websites — none?? Is on the facebook, yes he calls it “the facebook” TV Shows — mindhunters, criminal minds, anything cop related lmao probably like watched game of thrones with helen and other classic tv shows like that Movies — likes comedies best Greatest Want — to protect his family Greatest Need — to let go of the past and heal

[yn6k]

moonriase replied to your post “just throwing this out there because im curious about how others have...”

The way that I interpret the whole trilogy is that it all happens in high school seeing as how I believe that the timeline goes from WCID to WYLS (besides a couple of scenes) to I Loved You. Basic storyline is that Sungjin falls in love with Jae's friend, but she has feelings for someone else (that being Young K). Wonpil wants to be supportive but he can't help but let his feelings get in the way of things. Seeing that the girl wants to be with Young K and seeing them hang out with each other, Sungjin decides to confess to her. (Surprisingly enough, Sungjin doesn't tell her that she should be with him, instead telling her that it's okay that she likes another person and that he just wanted to get it out.) Wonpil gets upset and sees the bunny keychain that he dropped, indicating that he thinks that Sungjin has dropped their whole friendship for one girl. On Young K's side, he's basically the loner of the school, and not in the good way. While the girl does like and wants to help him (which she does during the whole convenience store scene), he doesn't really want to get involved with her for unknown reasons. (relationship problems/bad past?) This leads to the girl getting bad feelings for Young K, leading to an ambiguous situation between the two of them. However! There is an upside in the form of Dowoon, the lonely (probably) rich popular dude. With Young K deciding to help him out by punching out a bully of sorts, this leads to a friendship of sorts seeing as how Dowoon gives Young K an egg for his wounds. (Very adorable if I say so myself.) Meanwhile in Jae's world, he gets himself all caught up with this waitress from a local cafe, crushing on her hard and fast, leading to his disinvolvment with the whole love triangle (gah this has gotten long) To wrap it all up, I think the ending scene of the WYLS M/V takes place a few days after the whole confession things with Sungjin and the girl. Deciding that his friendship with Sungjin is more important than anything (even with his own feelings of regret and crush), he gives back the bunny keychain that Sungjin dropped. I think that you can look at the bunny keychain as a symbol of the friendship of Sungjin and Wonpil. For whatever reason Wonpil may have decided to give Sungjin the keychain as a joke gift of sorts long ago. Despite the whole joke gift thing, he views as something sentimental as the years go by as he slowly realizes that he's gaining more romantic feelings for Sungjin. Thus his longing and confused expressions towards the keychain during the ILY and WYLS MVs. There's no way that someone would get so wrapped up in a keychain unless it was just that important to them. This was really confusing and pretty much spit out from my head, but this was the best thing that I could think of for the whole trilogy. Part of me wants it to become a whole movie now since we have so many interpretations and questions towards the whole thing that need to be answered lol

oh thank you for your really thought out answer! i’ll put my response under the cut :)

i do agree about the chronology of the mvs being WCID WYLS and then I Loved You, especially since its basically confirmed in the mv itself in the beginning of WYLS. but idk, i  can see how could all be high school but part of me feels like the non high school scenes are like after high school scenes? maybe its just the fact that the boys dont really resemble high schoolers imo? like whenever theyre not in the school uniform its just weird to see them as smol high schoolers hahah but also certain things like how in i loved you, that closeup of youngks hand?? when i first saw that i thought it was a marriage or promise or engagement ring or smth of the sorts on his hand and thats why we got a closeup of it? which is one of the reasons i thought that it took place way after but alksdj maybe that detail meant absolutely nothing lmaoo haha esp since the other girl doesnt have a ring (but does youngk even like the girl hmmm). it also doesnt help that they have diff hair alksdjf but im probably overthinking that  i honestly dont think sungjin confessing the way he did is too much of a strange thought! it kinda also goes along with the whole vibe of the lyrics for ‘when you love someone’. like this whole feeling of wanting the one you love to be happy and sungjin assumes that her happiness lies with her feelings for youngk or something like that. and hmm i dont think i ever saw necessarily the girl getting bad feelings for youngk unless its that one mopping scene? to me that felt more like frustration or smth along those lines instead of like bad feelings also when youngk bumped into her it felt more like intrigue than anger haha but they do have an ambiguous relationship. nvr felt that same pull from youngk towards the girl as we get from sungjin to the girl. if anything youngk seems to be fascinated at her helping her out? someone he barely knows and someone who hes maybe not treated as fairly in the past (ie that mopping scene)? he seems to take her chivalry as inspiration and its probably the reason he stands up for dowoon in the arcade? how a selfless action can affect a relationship i think is also a common theme throughout ALL of them (aklsdjf maybe sans jae lkajlsk i feel like his story was almost an afterthought hes rather disconnected its almost weird). wonpil hiding his love, sungjin confessing but with no expectations, the girl helping youngk and youngk helping dowoon, all acts of selflessness.  the keychain tho! i think its all very interesting that basically everyone has interpreted it to be wonpils gift to sungjin or maybe something that belongs to the girl that was dropped on their way out but not something that wonpil could have dropped on the way in! but i also think that its more of a correct conclusion given where that shot of the keychain was placed in the mv and that coupled with the fact of how sungjin reacts to wonpil giving the key chain to him its like hes giving something to him that he is familiar with there is comfort and familiarity in the way he holds it. honestly i initially thought the keychain belonged to the girl, wonpil found it, contemplated what he should do with it on the monkey bars, and then finally gave it sungjin (but maybe im watching too many dramas haha) in terms of symbolism tho, sungjin folding his hand onto the keychain always to me represented him getting over the girl almost as if he doesnt need the keychain anymore? it was such a strange action to me for him to do that if it was a gift from wonpil that wonpils returning back to him. on the bus, wonpil looks absolutely torn when sungjin leaves but he looks really surprised at the fact that the keychain is on the ground like i dont think hes necessarily sad the keychain was dropped just a little ?? about it. also the whole theme of the song ‘when you love someone’ like hed rather be hurting himself so long as sungjin is happy with the girl (bc wonpil at that point might not have known how the confession had ended!! so it could have gone well or maybe he didnt confess wonpil might not have known anything! so) although i can definitely get behind the theory that the keychain belongs to wonpil and is precious to him as a symbol of a) his love for sungjin and b) sungjins friendship for him. im not sure if it would be a ‘joke present’ haha but. if you consider that meeting at the end of wyls to be the very first time that wonpil gave sungjin the keychain, i think that interaction takes on a diff meaning too.

[jaeminlore]

are u taking requests still? im in the mood for emo jinki tbh 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 - razzle dazzle

• i miss jinki so much today • sad!emo!jinki tho,,,, idk if i can write this• jinki who has a terrible home life and tries to drown everything out w music• his grades at school are pretty decent but he has no friends• bc he doesn’t want them• yes he does• sometimes talks to jonghyun in math class but it’s usually only if he needs to borrow a pencil or smth• hangs out at the back of the school to avoid going home• it’s his parents,, they fight so much that he’d rather stay away from the house• because every day it feels less like a home and more like a war zone• you, lol, are a troublemaker in school• a loner who smokes behind the dumpster • occasionally you’ll graffiti stuff on said dumpsters but it’s all in good fun• you never actually do anything bad • except your grades suck big time• and so your history teacher is like dude,,, get some help,,, pls• he recommends this student jinki nd you’re like ,, the emo kid?• you know you’re exaggerating like he just wears dark hoodies and has earbuds in all day but,,, he’s definitely on the goth side of the spectrum • still you have to get your grades up so you go over to jinki like hey come to my house after school we’ve got work to do• jinki is like ????? but agrees bc it’ll keep him out of his house• and when he arrives at your house he’s rlly confused,,, bc you joke around w your dad while your mom is complaining about the dishes• and jinki knows how this scenario goes so he’s just waiting for your dad to say something snarky towards your mom but ?? he doesn’t ??? in fact he does the exact opposite and begins to help your mom w the dishes• jinki is #shooketh• but seriously he’s v confused bc fighting is all he’s ever known when it comes to relationships and here your parents are,, like actually loving each other • jinki is pretty silent for the majority of the tutoring,, only mumbling questions that he knows you know the answer to• “okay what’s up?” you ask, never one to beat around the bush• jinki licks his lips and pulls his hood down, and his dark brown hair looks a bit messy, but boyish and cute “do your parents fight?”• you seem alarmed bc like where did that come from lol but “i mean, yeah, sometimes. but it’s not often, and they’ve learned that talking things out is a lot better than fighting anyway”• “oh”• jinki fiddles w his hoodie sleeves bc he really doesn’t know what to say• he’s just a seventeen year old boy who wants his parents to love each other again• you seem to understand, even though he hasn’t said a word, and you close the history book with a loud thud• “let’s take a break. my dad makes a mean milkshake and you’ve got to try them”• and jinki thinks it’s going to be torture spending time w a family that’s happier than his, just making him jealous• instead,,,, it’s nice,,,, and comfortable,,, and jinki feels warmth spread through his limbs when you smile at him from time to time• even when his curfew hits, and he has to go, you’re telling him to come back, and that maybe the two of you can go paint the dumpster together• jinki agrees, even tho your mother is chiding you both• he’s halfway down the porch steps when you run outside and hug him from behind• “if it ever… gets too much…. you’re always welcome here.”• he can’t answer or look at you, or you’ll see that he’s started crying• happy tears ofc• when he gets home his earbuds are back in, drowning out the world around him, but he goes to sleep feeling a bit lighter,, a bit happier• you’ve offered him a solace, and the thought makes him a lot less lonely• a lot less helpless• needless to say, jinki spends almost every day after school with you and your family• and every day he falls in love w you just a bit more :)• the end

[happyendingsong]

im just so fuckin DUMB jesus like. one of my friends who’s really sound and lovely asked me to go run errands with her today and it was fun! but they mentioned a c o u p l e of times like ‘yeah i just wanna make sure you’re getting out of your dorm and having social interactions and all’ which like is objectively really nice and caring for them to do and i should really appreciate it cause usually no one tries contacting me if they’re not legally obligated to and yeah it’s just really nice when ppl go out of their way to invite me to things.

but my shit brain’s automatic response to that is still ‘ah cool so you’ve noticed i’m a total fucking loser and loner with no friends which is the objective truth anyway but just GOOD 2 KNOW that that’s the impression i give off as well and that’s what everyone else thinks and Knows abt me and i’m that fucking pathetic that you felt obliged to look after me not out of any genuine feeling that i’m a fun person 2 be around but i’m just that fucking miserable and pathetic i need any help i can get’. and just!!!! that opinion Feels true and is the only one echoin around my shit brain!!!!!!!!!! like even if i’m using exaggeratory language here like the sentiment behind it is still. true. im so fuckin narcissistic just EVERYTHING has to be about me and my fuckin victim complex.

and they mentioned a couple times over this trip abt like a doughnut run they did a few nights ago with that friend group i’m sort of in but also really not or when they all went to the cinema a couple days ago and all and i just! have the fucking audacity! to be annoyed that i wasn’t invited!! like i’m annoyed with them that if they’re that concerned with me not having enough social interactions recently then why not invite me 2 shit or smth idk..,,,

but jesus like that’s so fucking presumptuous of me to be demanding that they would want me at any of these events cause why the fuck would they i’m no fuckin fun at all!!!!!!!! i’m clearly just tolerable enough to bring on an errands run if no one else is free but if you want to have Fun with Friends then i’m not any good for that!!!!!!!!!!! like i’m already real self conscious that that friend group doesn’t really like me, like i’m only hangin in there through this friend and yeah i could see even if this friend maybe did want to invite me that they know the rest of the group wouldn’t want me there and like fucking OBVIOUSLY that is okay, the entire world doesn’t have to revolve around me i’m so fucking annoying!!!!!!!!!

god i can’t let anyone do anything nice for me without breaking it down into why i’m actually pathetic and this thing they’re doing just proves it, i’m so fucking self absooooooorbed jesus. and yeah like i’d really like to hang out with them and the rest of the group more and get more comfortable around them and maybe be fun sometimes???? but i already have it in my head that they think i’m pathetic or flat out don’t like me. and i hate contacting people first cause that just makes me feel pathetic and clingy too, and last week when everything was REALLY really rough and i actually did try to contact people over multiple days to talk shit out just none of them were interested. and i KNOW that they’re busy and they have their own shit going on obviously but i still have the audacity to get offended and hurt over that too, im so fuckin gross.

and im just dumb and an ugly person and im so sick of bein myself. and like i kind of want to bring this stuff up with that friend just 2 get outside of my shit brain a bit and see what they actually think without projecting all of this shit onto them which obvs isn’t fair to them at all, but they have their own shit and they’re really busy at the moment and i don’t want to guilt them over my fucking melodrama or insinuate it’s their fault. but i also genuinely? don’t know? if this is stuff people bring up with friends?? like is this kind of stuff just shit you should work through alone cause you shouldn’t be this fucking dumb and you SHOULD be able to work through it and it’s just selfish trying to make it someone else’s problem? or like do you bring this shit up with friends so there isn’t all this damn miscommunication and you end up contorting their words and intentions into something you can feel bad about so you can lounge in masturbatory self pity all day instead of getting work fucking DONE and being a functional human being. i don;t know a fucking thing lads!!!!!!!!!!!!

[theday]

hide and seek, fireworks, my style, coloured, your love, dream might (romantic or platonic? i love options), i'll be there, because it's you ((((:, you smile, with you, and better with you!!!!

thank you so much for aksing falen i love these and it also got super long lmao rip

Hide & Seek: what’s the first thing you notice when you meet someone new?

in real life, its probably their shoes/socks?????? LMAO and then their appearance but im trying 2 not let their appearance stop me from becoming friends with them :-o

online, i usually??? read ppl’s abouts first???? but idk like when it comes to actually talking to them i guess itd be their typing style?? and their use of emojis/the gif function (jenny) helps me to assess them although i do know that the way they type =/= how they are as a person but thats just what i notice first

Fireworks: name something astro’s done that has made your heart explode

falen u rly had 2 do it to me? ????? but hrm…. whenever they post selcas and when they just laugh every time myungjun laughs thats the shit that gets me the most bc its so/???? pur??e??? i love them a lot theyre always so happie and theyre all smiles every time they do a vlive it makes me happie

My Style: what do you usually wear out?

clothes not 2 sound like a loner but. i rarely go outside bc i only go outside when my family eat out and thats only on like weekends and if im hanging out with pals so i always get the chance to wear the same shirt, shorts and shoes lmao 

but its a black cat shirt (used to be a button up thing but singapore is 2 hot 4 me) and blue shorts and white converse 

Coloured: favourite MV aesthetic? 

ok real talk all of their mvs are so pretty and everything??? but my favourite has to be baby or csc

Your Love: top three astro songs

o w0rm

again

confession

every minute 

Dream Night: describe a dream date with anyone

idk?? smth ive always wanted 2 do with anyone is just walk through a park or just walk when the weather is not 2 hot or 2 cold (ike what binuki did in their recent vlive) 

if we’re getting more romantic mayb just??? cuddling???? idk i rly cant see this happening tbh 

I’ll Be There: fave astro vlive you’d watch over and over again?

but theres so many :-( but possibly all of eunwoo’s just 10 minutes with binnie :-0 the shrek vlive with the ice cream made me laugh so hard though mmMM

Because It’s You: why do you love your astro bias?

ur rly gna make me do all 6 members falen??????? ill try 2 keep it short

myungjun; binnie said he was sure mj wouldnt make it into astro and im assuming its because he was the one who was a trainee the shortest but??? look at him now with his strong vocals and even stronger personality!!! astro mightve done fine without mj but listen.. their vlives, appearance on variety shows, etc. would never be able to be as funny because mj is the reason for everyones laughter and it makes me so happy??? mj has that ability to crack anybody up with his laugh and the shit he says and does is so funny too pleaseth and i just?? appreciate mj for being there so fucking  much because he really resolves any tension in the atmosphere so easily and as the oldest member im so glad to see he doesnt find anything awkward AND despite the age gap between him and sanha, theyre like the closest?? lets not forget on that one radio thing yesterday they (astro) were asked who they were most comfy with in the dorm and 3/5 answered myungjun :_) im just happy myungjun exists? thank u mj i love u mister 777

PARK JINWOO; jinjin is the one of the sweetest leaders out there and i know every group has a great leader but jinjin is really that leader to me because as the rest of astro have mentioned before, jinwoo really buys them shit and they have said that he is the sweetest?? remember in the fan made fanmeeting i dont know what its called but i linked it and just??? jinjin is literally an angel!!! the one vlive he did with dogs? my heart melted off!!!!!! he really went and learnt the names of all the dogs present in the dog cafe!!!! he stopped the black dog which was biting hard on the table bc he was scared it’d injure itself/get in trouble and just??? jinwoo is so fucking nice just ??? if u look in the dictionary park jinwoo will appear as a synonym believe me ok and jinjin is part of dance line everybody lets not forget that he dances to release stress and that amaizng intro to again he did with rocky for their dream pt2 showcase because that was fucking so ?? i love talent and! AND i will never shut up but as a leader jinwoo takes care of his members so much and he also knows how to have fun with them and he jsut!!!!! i love him a lot

cha! eu! nwoo! (dongmin); i know 4 a fact that this will get so long lmao rip but first i just wanted to say that i am so proud of dongmin and how far he has come as a dancer and vocalist in astro ok so obviously i dont know the real hard facts tm and i can never tell the difference in anything so i dont know how accurate i really am but last year (and even now) i know eunwoo had a lot of personal schedules and he barely had time to practice? ?? i really dont know but im p sure that was it???? idk but dongmin has had to work so hard the whole of last year with the amount of comebacks astro did and i jus??? im so proud of eunwoo for being able to work hard for astro and still attend all those other schedules at the same time??? like i said idk how much time he did have/didnt have but i know it mustve been little with how late it would be whenever he arrived back at the dorm after his stuff and??? eunwoo had to practice his lines and the dance (astro’s choreography looks hard as shit and its tiring too) in time for their comeback promotions ??? and!! dongmin used to be that member (now its all of astro) who would constantly do vlives for arohas and lets not forget his just one 10 minutes where he would do vlives that were always over 10 minutes where he just talks to fans im eternally grateful for all the work dongmin puts in for astro and arohas and im sure he puts in more than 100% effort when it comes to his personal schedules too!!!! dongmin deserves the best and ive seen someone say b4 that he’d probably feel bad if he had more lines bc he was already “stealing” the spotlight by being a “face genius” and i just!! youre righ??t???? eunwoo is incredibly selfless and its easy 2 assume these kinda things tbh lee dongmin is so much more than his face and visuals he is a hardworker and!!! he loves his members and fans so damn much im !!! i love eunwoo so much i hope he knows how much we love him 

binnie; god with bin there isnt somethiing that made me love him??? all he did was go :) and my brain decided i was gonna love him forever ok but……hrm….. i guess i love him because hes such a dork?? like. .. when he laughs he just snorts and its so funny lmao i believe bin’s a good friend too well no shit ?? uMMm moon bin has a cute smile yall…… whenever he smiles my heart explodes hes just that powerful and also!!! bin has been a trainee for 7 years now and im just !! he made it!! like what the post i reblogged earlier said, he probably had other dreams but he still stuck with being an idol ??? in the end and that !!! im sad he didnt get to pursue the things he couldve liked better but im also happy hes managed to find a dream he likes and that hes basically living the dream right now??? and im so happy for him because 7 years may not be a lot to some but bin’s still young his childhood was basically training??? im just!!!!!!!!!!! so proud of him and now hes on the same kind of music shows his faves are on too nd it makes me rly proud (idk any other words my vocabulary is so fucking weak oh my god) he is having the time of his life with astro and arohas right now im so glad i forgot what i wanted 2 say im sorry bin i did u dirty im2 tense rn but i love u and i love bin bc of how much hes done and the amt of scarifies he has 2 have made in order 2 get 2 where he is tdy 

rocky swag (minhyuk); minhyuk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love him because !! hes so awkward but he tries his best for arohas!!!!!!!!!! in that first vlive he did alone he was so nervous but he managed to warm up and in the next vlive he did alone he did something that he was comfortable with (dance) and im glad he’s able to do vlives normally now even if there isnt any recent solo vlives i can see how much more comfortable he is on vlive now !!!!!! my love for minhyuk is similar to bin’s bc all he did was smile and suddenly????? im in love???? its the swag lmao but seriousy tho after finding out rocky did all sorts of dance i found him really??? respectable??? because he was able to learn so many types of dance and isnt that the coolest thing ever???? lets not forget how well he can sing???? im happy and so proud (jesus) that he sang on the recent album since previously he said that he didnt hvae any plans of singing in the albums so!!!! now!! hes singing!!!!!!!!!!! although the songs dont do him justice tbh its ok we all know how lovely he sounds when he sings especially in the binuki vlive where he sang wyls i swer my ear drums were blessed?? park minhyuk can do anything get urself a legend like rocky so basiclaly i love rocky aka park minhyuk bc hes just!!!!! outstanding???? hes handsome, he can dance really fucking well, he can sing and rap !!!!!!!!!!!!! and?? hes just a fool??? he’s warming up to doing vlives and just being himself and its the greatest thing ever i love him a lot

sanha; YOON SANHA!!!!!!!!! Love of my LIFE the baby i will protect for the rest of my LIFe??????? he is DAT boi .. the boy i love so much with my whole heart!! sanha is so cute and he just!! hes always making fun and bullying the older members i love it so much but ofc everyones weak 4 sanha bc b*tch is 2 cute honestly can relate if sanha punched or stole my money ill let him off bc hes just that cute . lets not forget he learnt how 2 play the guitar all by himslef jae is shaking ok and sanha is such a nice voice?????? every time he screams i lose my hearing its ok id do anything 4 this boy???? and to think hes only (1) year older than me is kinda??? wowie???? sanha is rly out here being a superstar and a student @ the same time and hes doing an awesome job @ being amazing !!! sanha is so cute and just?????? he loves his other members and family so much i love sanha a lot and i hope nobody will ever make him cry (sad tears) bc i will personally go to that person and we’ll have a nice chat :-) i cant think of anything atm but sh loves arohas so much and hes always doing aegyo 4 us idk its just . … thakn u young prince

You Smile: name three things that have made you smile in the past week

ok easy

mx comeback

daily astro vlives (its okay if they dont do vlives everyday they have 2 rESt)

becoming friends with lovely mbbs :_) 

with you: talk about a mutual without using their name

how long is this answer gonna be oh w0rm.. but here we go this is abt someone who ive never talked about but do talk 2 p often and theyre the other online person i am most comfortable with talking 2!!!!! 

theyre great tbh and rly good @ art and i know theyve gone through so many shit things in their life but im so glad theyre still hanging on even if their sleep schedule is totally wack still love u tho lmao at least theyre getting more than enough sleep!! theyre cute when they see sanha and it makes me soft seeing them go soft bc theyre never that warm??? when it comes 2 other ppl (kihyun crying) and im just so glad i managed to help them get (further) into astro!! being able to talk to somebody about astro has helped me so much and then i became friends with jen but im still so thankful to have a friend like [redacted] and im happy we’re friends!!!!!!!! i love them so much and i hope their days are filled with happiness even if it doesnt last for long i hope they have at least (1) happy time each day bc they deserve the BEST!!!!!!!!!!! 

even when i was still a young myday they helped me by providing links and everything just telling me where everything was and i was so :_) bc!!! they !! a bigger account was helping me someone who didnt even have 20 followers at that time and without them i wouldve never found anything tbh!!! even now when im the one whos been into astro longer, they still manage to find things so much faster than me and imlike?????? wow thats amaizng???? theyre amazing and i appreciate their presence on my tl/dash and in my dms so much thats one of the reasons why i thought they were older bc of how mature and just?? the older vibe they gave off was strong with they way they help people and whenever they comment on my tweets or someone else’s tweets im like !!!!!!!!! you’re doing amazing sweetie 

theyre so easy to talk to and even though our humor was something i thought was very different we manage to make each other laugh so much and i jsut!!! happiness!!!!!!! 

ok this was abt bell and i dnt think they’ll ever see this but if u do i love u a lot bell thank u for being alive ur so funnie and cute just thank u so mch!!! for everything

better with you: your favourite memory related to astro?

every time i watch them on vlive live i get so happy and thats my favourite memory

[jverd]

dont mind me these r just my connections i need

JAERD (22, male, single &...something)

- male friend of some sort

- listen jaerds most definitely asexual/aromantic (at least so far, he may be sex positive and demiromantic but so f ar No) but i feel like the right person to try and convince him that maybe love isnt JUST some brain synapses wld be cool... u feel ? .. he is very annoying though hes not the Most Loveable 

- a new roommate bc he Movin Out

COOK (27, male, single & straight)

- SOMEONE. ANYONE. HES SO LONELY. maybe a younger sibling kind of relationship (w/o being Actually Related) bc he comes from  a big family and he misses little siblings

KELBY (18, male, secretly falling in Super Homo Love with his doctor)

- MORE FRIENDS. GOd. PLEASE.

- a beard !!! (gotta b female.... listen hes religious)

- an abusive dad OR the mom who got the HECK outta town and just happened to come back now (get this boy outta his abusive household, give me the awkward “did u miss me” mom/son relationship PLEASE)

MOOSH (24, male, single & bi)

- a childhood bff !!! moosh moved to sheffield 13 yrs ago soo.... please

- any friends. anything. a love interest ???? he drives an ice cream truck and hes REALLY stupid but hes got a heart of gold ok

SCOOCH (22, male, being courted by his enemy ?? ok)

- A FRIEND who accepts his eccentricity 

- maybe his LIT AS FUCK witch mom !!!!!!

BLUE (23, male, single)

- someone needs to fall in love with this absolute trash human (if they have chemistry bc im Picky)

- someone hes definitely gotten in fights w bc he was an Angry Garbage Boy(tm) in high school

- That Guy who made him realize his ass was gay (despite being anti sex for most of his life/kinda now bc of that childhood Incident)

- mayhaps.... a friend

BUCKET (22, male, single but Tragically in love w his best friend who DOES NOT reciprocate... yike)

- always lookin for those FWB’s u feel... hes had a Lot of Sex (its how he hides his feelings for his bff)

- a wholesome friend bc all his friends are wild af

LEAF (29, male, kinda turned on by one of his employees.. i mean um)

- an Adult Friend (no sex ! just... someone his own age... hes a dick and a loner but he has to have Someone)

- a younger sibling (sister??) who may have been the actual child of his foster parents whos lived in sheffield even when he was back in scotland or smth IDK, maybe they were reunited bc of they parents deaths

- an ex bf/gf whos kinda crazy and likes to cause trouble