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#mayve its time i sleep
chisatowo · 2 years
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While all of random card au Tsugumi's broken relationships make me explode a lil, recently I've been the most obsessed with their and Sayo's relationship, because it's the one where a lot of what when wrong was not only actively Tsugumi's fault, but also consciously. It's honestly rly unsettling looking at it from Sayo's perspective, because with the others the things that went wrong were mostly contained to one moment, one scene pieced together by the past light vessels outside of either their or Tsugumi's knowledge. This isn't that. Tsugumi actively lied to Sayo from the start, and was in no way pushed to do so by the past vessels. Like Tsugumi wasn't exactly mentally stable, but that obviously doesn't stop it from being fucked up. Anyways can you tell I found a new random card au Tsugu song recently
#rat rambles#band posting#random card au#sayo is having A Time in this au fjfmdkdjf#I need to develop her and rei's plot more cause theyre rly important but they also dont do a whole lot at the same time#its just them pondering 50 things at any given time but obly being able to shrug and be like welp mayve well fibd out someday#meanwhile tsugumi is rapidly spiraling and just clinging to sayo as the only comfort in their life#while also knowing what theyre doing is fucked up and that all this is a ticking timebomb and wont last#but not being able to let go of that last speck of comfort#sayo doesnt know abt any of this ofc but she will eventually. she unsurprisingly doesnt handle it well#meanwhile hina is just farting around with chisato not realising that she was basically murdered lol#and chisato is mostly just glad that theyre out of the void place and that hina is ok but theyre also in a constant state of freaking out#abt everything all the time#look they basically just blacked out for like 5 years and now theyre an adult and so are all their friends and also one of said friends is#somehow a god now and no one else remembers anything abt him from before he was abducted#and hina both is and isnt helping#it doesnt help that neither of them have stars so they cant actually contact aya#chisato is part star and hina died and got better so she also doesnt have one abymore#if chisato did have a star though aya would have gotten a very long and loud voicemail in seconds#anyways I need to sleep gn
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epitheta · 2 years
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Scrybe cuddle pile (with you in the middle)
god. i wish.
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talkfastromance4 · 4 years
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Easier
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7th installment of my CALM series! Catch up on the others below, each song is paired with another song so the ‘stories’ line up. And just like the others, the boy in question is up to the reader’s discretion :)
CALM Series Masterlist
Masterlist
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. *copyright is listed below*
• • • •
Cat and mouse. Predator versus prey. She and he lived for the chase, became intoxicated with the thrill of it all. It’s a whirlwind of emotions, a cataclysmic game of arousal and passion that is their relationship. Her cat eyes zeroed in on him while she was placed perfectly in his crosshairs. 
Opposites attract but there’s more involved with that attraction. An attraction of black and white, night and day, storms, and sunshine. They knew what to do to press each other’s buttons but then knew exactly how to diffuse the bomb that was precariously placed. 
They laughed at the dramatics of it, the simplicity of their forgiveness. Two sides of the same coin. Sometimes the blows would be too much, the window of opportunity to wave the white flag of surrender has been gone and all guns are blazing.
“Is it easier to stay?” he nearly shouts, fingers raking through his hair.
“Is it easier to go?” she shouts back. She always has to one up him. 
It’s a continuous cycle, fight and run away for a few days only to circle back right in the same place they started. Love in their eyes, apologies dripping from lips. It’s a new day, a fresh start. When their love is good, it’s great. 
He’ll bring her flowers to brighten her day and she’ll cook his favorite meal. This period is fleeting, but when they’re in the midst of it all it’s pure bliss. Loving touches, soft kisses, and plenty of time in between the sheets. 
Their power is exchanged equally. Two forces joining for a sonic boom that shakes the windows and their souls. It shakes their memories like a snow globe of how much they absolutely love each other, how through the good, the bad, and the dirty, their love is bound in chains. 
“You’re so damn beautiful,” he tells her, his voice like vapor. She feels the sentiment wash over her body while his lips scorch her skin. 
It’s always calmest before the storm.
It’s a night out with friends, she’s hopping from person to person, new drink in hand while he just wants to go. He has an early flight the next day and wants to get some sleep, maybe a few cuddles in with her before he’s gone for a week. 
He’s irritated she keeps walking away from him and she’s annoyed he keeps following her. Their coin is being shown the same face, and the odds aren’t in their favor tonight. When he finally manages to grab hold of her, her eyes are blazing. 
“Stop following me like a lost puppy!” she bites harshly. “Go if you want to, I’m staying.”
“No, come home with me since I’m leaving early,” he asks, “or have you forgotten?”
“How could I forget? You always leave me.”
That stops him, but he glances around at her friends trying to avoid the obvious scene that’s about to transpire. He pulls her closer, voice low enough just so she can hear him.
“Do we really wanna do this now? Right here with all your friends around?”
“There’s no other time to do it. Just go home, I’ll see you later,” she sighs in defeat. 
He watches her go in shock; this isn’t how it’s supposed to happen. They’ll fight and bicker but then they resolve it together. She’s never given up so easily and made walking away from him look any easier than right now. He figures they’ll work it out in the morning. 
He stayed up the whole night waiting for her, calling her, texting her. But she disappeared like a ghost, running away again instead of facing the bigger issue at hand. 
When he comes home after his week away, she crashes into him like a wave and he welcomes her willingly. He shuffles them away from the door and he falls onto the couch. Her body is wrapped tightly around his before she pulls away and touches his hair, his eyes, his cheeks, and his lips. As if she forgot what he looked like.
“Sometimes I love you so much that I hate you,” she confesses then connects her lips to his in a fiery kiss. It leaves him burning for more.
“Right now, it’s so hard to blame you,” he smirks while her fingers work on his shirt. 
“Why?” she pants swiping her tongue over his neck. He pulls her head back, fist in her hair, throat exposed perfectly. 
“Cause you’re so damn beautiful.”
He gives her a hard kiss, the storm brewing once more. Their love is only meant to fill a certain capacity, and once it reaches its peak that’s when the trouble starts all over again. The hardest part of it all is that they’re only built to fall.
But they fall together.
• • • •
Copyright talkfastromance4 © All works is intellectual property of the author. All rights reserved. Any redistribution or reproduction or any part or all contents in any form is prohibited. You may not, without written expression and consent from the author, distribute works amongst other social media platforms
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Ok....27. Winter and Yang.
In answer to the Prompt, 27 “I’m not a Child” I also want to give a shot out to @texanredrose because their Elderburn is awesome and I hope to write that well one day.
If you like the story, mayve buy me a Ko-fi
“Don’t you think you’ve had enough, Yang?” Winter asked, tapping her mug against Yang’s empty martini glass.
“Nahs, I’s good.” Yang reached out to grab the glass, but her metal fingers missed the glass by a good inch. She glared at it, wondering how it moved. “I can handle my liquor, unlike somes people I know.” The grin she flashed at Winter only affected half her face, the other half of it forming a few seconds later.
Sighing, Winter drained her mug of beer and sit it down on the bar. “That was only one time, and you did not fare much better.”
“Who puked on me again?” Yang wrapped both hands around the glass, draining out the last little bit of pink liquid from her glass. “I at least made it to the bathroom.”
“Yes, but who ends up tossing you into the shower to clean you off?” Winter pulled out a handful of lin to pay for their drinks, looping her arm through her girlfriend’s arm.
“Hey, I wants another,” Yang said as Winter pulled her from the bar.
“No, Yang, you’re done for the night.”
“I’s not a child, Winter, I want a few more.” They stood next to the bar in an awkward tug of war. Both ladies were evenly matched in strength, Winter’s height canceled out by Yang’s mass.
Seeing that this fight would not end well, Winter let go. Yang collapsed to the ground. Sitting up, she pushed her blonde hair out of her face. “I think you might be right, Winter.” Yang let out a little hiccup, tears forming in her eyes.
The sudden display of emotions had Winter picking up Yang from the ground. “Shh, shh, don’t cry hun, let’s just go back to my place.”
Yang nodded, hair covering her face as she stumbled from the bar, hanging off Winter. The bar sat only a couple blocks from Winter’s apartment, a gentrified townhouse. The stairs turned out to be an obstacle for both of them, Winter more drunk than she noticed.
Inside, she laid Yang out on the couch and went to gather both of them glasses of water. Returning to the living room, Yang had pulled off her boots, socks, jacket and shirt. The sight of all that clothing spread around her living room set her teeth on edge, but she couldn’t help admiring the view of Yang’s shoulders and back. Her place was also fairly warm, so she couldn’t really blame Yang.
Handing Yang her glass, she sat across from her on the couch. Yang sipped her water, head down so her hair covered her face. Winter frowned at that. While not the most obvious with her own emotions, one thing Winter enjoyed about Yang was how open she was with her own.
“What’s wrong?” Winter asked, her own buzz adding to her bluntness.
“You’re leaving again,” Yang responded, sipping her water. “Like you always do.”
“I am a soldier, and my country needs me.” Winter frowned at those words. “It’s my job, Yang, I have to do my job.”
“I know, you’re always so focused on what you do. It’s just, I always feel like you’re gone, for so long, and than you come back and it’s never for long enough.” Yang placed the water on the coffee table and pulled her legs up to her chest.
“I’m the best, and Ironwood trust me to handle the more sensitive things.” Winter felt like she was bragging, but its was also the truth. She was one of the best, and Ironwood always needed something done.
He always needed something done.
“I feel like such a shitty girlfriend, but I see you like once a month, and then you’re off, doing something dangerous. I know you can’t contact me on your missions, but I barely feel like we’re dating.”
Winter snapped her head to look at Yang again, closed off on her side of the couch. “Are you breaking up with me?”
Yang tilted her head so that Winter saw one puffy, tear stained eye. “What, no, why would you think that?”
“You just said it doesn’t feel like we’re dating.” Winter stood, needing to move as she felt her anxiety start to increase.
“I’m not saying we should see other people, I’m just feeling like I never see you. You come into town, we have great fucking sex, spend a few days together, and then you’re off doing whatever Ironwood wants you to do. I want to be supportive, but I can’t even send you cute texts or surprise you with lunch at work. It’s just, a few days together, and then I’m without you.” She tipped her head forward again, hair separating them again.
Winter frowned as she paced, downing her glass of water before she placed it next to Yang’s. The muddle of her brain started to move, putting all the little things together. Yang sending more and more time with her when she was in town, her drinking taking a sharp uptake right before Winter has to leave, her “burrowing” Winter’s clothes before she has a chance to wash them. Winter’s last mission ended only a few days ago, and now Ironwood was sending her to Vacuo, to oversee transport of some robots.
The work was never hard, but it ate up all the time she had. It hadn’t always been like this, her missions and time spent out of town had taken place over longer stretches of time, typically two months before she went out again.
“Fuck,” Winter said. “Yang, I’m so sorry.”
“No, you didn’t do anything wrong, Winter, I’m just being drunk and sour.” She rolled away from Winter and stretched out on the couch. “I’m tired, and I’m sorry I got so drunk. Wake me before you leave tomorrow?” Her voice cracked. She pulled the blanket on the couch around her and was out in a second.
Winter cursed under her breath and walked to her room. She wanted to stomp, wanted to scream, but she didn’t want to disturb Yang. Pulling her scroll from her pocket, she called Ironwood.
When the light blinked into the bedroom, Yang mumbled into awakefulness. Her head felt lumpy, her mouth felt dry, and the sticky feeling let her know she cried again last night. The scroll on the nightstand flashed the time when she pressed it, almost 11. It also had a message from Ironwood.
Yang grabbed the scroll and stared at it. She didn’t even have Ironwood saved in her phone. Sliding away the message, the lock screen was a picture of her in a yellow sundress and a white hat, laughing at something. Yang couldn’t remember what she was laughing at, but she knew this wasn’t her phone, because her phone had a picture of her and Winter in the snow.
She was also pretty sure she fell asleep on the couch. Next to her, someone rolled over and threw an arm around Yang’s waist.
“More sleep,” Winter said, pulling herself closer to Yang. She nuzzled her face against Yang’s back, letting out a content sigh.
“Winter, hun, you’re late.” Yang said, twisting around to shake Winter.
“Called Ironwood and said I needed personal time.” She kept her eyes close.
“He sent you a message.” Yang waved the scroll near her face, panic entering her voice.
Winter grabbed the scroll, and flung it at the door. “Fuck Ironwood and his stupid fucking messages. He ain’t keeping me away from my girlfriend any fucking more.”
Yang sighed, but snuggled close to Winter. Who was she complain about getting what she wanted?
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vamprefaggot · 7 years
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hoooo boi
@fuckingbop(THANK U BABE) tagged me so ?? here wo go ;)) 
rules: answer the qs and tag the peeps? i think? that’s what imma do anyway h e c k 
nicknames: uhh shit Lo, Lorgan, Daddy, Dad, child, gay boy, etc. 
gender: i appear to have lost that when i lost my will to live
star sign: leo 
height: 5′2.75
time: 8:07 pm
birthday: aug. 10 yeet
fav bands: fall out boy, p!atd, cobra starship, so forth
fav single artists: dodie, troye sivan, brendon urie ;))
song stuck in my head: uhh not rlly one rn bc i’m blasting fob mayve the voltron theme?
last movie: guardians of the galaxy 2(it was okay)
last show: voltron i binged a Lot of it while knitting its heckin gr8 gO
why did make blog: to send fanart to someone lmao 
what do you post/reblog: what dont i post tbh yall should be following my knitting chronicles yeet
last thing googled: war of 1812
other blogs: @writeywritey and @ichbinnando ;))) both r shit but like
do you get asks: not even close to as many as i’d like but yEah? 
url reason: i blame @designerdadiel
following: 901
followers: 245 yay
average hours of sleep: its slowly declining and i blame the fact that i installed the kindle app on my nook(the irony)
lucky #: idk maybe 6
instruments: i used to be able to play the beetles on the ukelele but i have Not retained that knowledge and i can slightly play the mandolin
what wearing: chucks, black leggings, plaid shirt and a beanie i look So Damn Gay its great
dream job: tattoo artist
dream trip: brighton w/ the lovely @ethxnnestxr :’)) 
fav food: uhhh idk i’ll eat a lot of shit
fav song: HOLD ME TIGHT OR DONT LIKE JFC ITS SO G O O D IM PROUD OF MY SONS
last book i read: i’m rereading Slathbogs Gold bc its fantastic i love that entire series tbh theres a new book i haven;t read hnnn
top 3 fictional universes: uh shit idk i’d like to go Anywhere in voltron its so damn pretty and hnnn 
oh shit tHATS ALL FOLKS idk i’m lazy if i tagged you in it yOU and then anyone else who wants to do it?? yes do it tag me i Do wanna read your responses d o i t
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aviwrites · 7 years
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Visions.
Author: @aviwrites
Fandom(s): None, completely original
Warnings: (Mild?) body horror, there’s a guy who has really creepy visions
Prompt: Mayve and Nimel have a little chat.
Notes: At last, after a shit ton of procrastination, I’ve finally finished this! This is a one shot that I wanted to do for some pretty recent OCs, to sort of help me figure out their personalities and stuff. I did a reference sheet for the both of them over on my art blog, so if you want a better look of what they look like here’s Mayve’s and here’s Nimel’s! Anyway, I’m not sure if I’ll actually use this for the Really Big Thing™ I have planned for these kids, but for now I think this will probably count as a back story. Enjoy!
Word Count: 1645
Fic/Link to Fic: [DeviantArt]
When it really came down to it, Mayve really did not know much about Nimel.
Sure, they got along just fine, and surprisingly had a few things in common. A mutual homelessness, for one thing, and a past neither of them were too keen on sharing--although, from what she understood, Nimel’s history seemed to be a lot more tragic than hers. But regardless of their friendliness towards each other, of the time they had spent in each other’s presence in that one cafe at Pivadreus’ town square and the stories they would share while they were there, Mayve did not suppose that she knew Nimel very well.
Which was why she was surprised to find that, of all the people he could have gone to at the middle of the night, he chose to visit her first.
Mayve’s little makeshift home was definitely not a house by any means. It was more like a tent, pitched and held by the trees in the Fernwill Woods. There was no operating doorbell for it--it did not even have a door--and there was little of a hard surface a visitor could rasp their knuckles on, if they wanted to. But nonetheless Nimel tapped the tarp of the tent, and the flapping noise it made was somehow enough to stir Mayve from her sleep. She poked her head out, hair still messy from tossing in her dreams, and looked up to see what the disturbance was.
“Nimel?” she asked, and then proceeded to rub at one of her seven eyes with the side of her thumb. What a strange sight to see at an hour like this. What hour was it, anyway? “What’re you doing here?”
Nimel shifted slightly from one foot to another, looking awfully uncomfortable with the question and with the current situation as he glanced away from her for a brief second. Even the painted designs on the part of his mask that covered his right eye seemed to look away (she had long ago realized that this oddity was a result of the man’s own enchantments, but it was still unnerving to watch at times), until he sighed and his gaze fell on her again.
“I just wanted to make sure you were alright,” he said softly at last, and all of Mayve’s eyes blinked in surprise as she suddenly felt more awake than she did just a few seconds ago. Odd. His voice was missing its usual mysterious, “I-know-something-you-don’t” tone. It almost sounded as though he was...worried about her.
“Of course I’m alright,” Mayve answered and stepped outside, chin tilting upward so she could look at her company. Nimel was a giant of a man, and Mayve’s kind was not exactly tall. She barely reached half his height--and that was not counting the horns on top of her head. “What about you? Are you alright?”
There was a long second of hesitant silence. Then two, and then Nimel gestured at the ground in front of the tent Mayve called home. Understanding immediately, she nodded at the suggestion and he gratefully took a seat with a sigh that sounded weighed by some unseen force. She sat down beside him with her legs crossed in a pretzel.
“I’ve told you about the--you know,” Nimel gestured at the right side of his face with a vague wave of his hand. Mayve nodded at this, fully aware of what he was talking about; the poor guy had dabbled a little too much in the arts of necromancy some long time ago, and the dark magic left him with some unappealing physical side effects. A black discoloration that spread through the right side of his face was now hidden by the mask he wore, the paint of which and the enchantments it bore a vain hope to reverse the adverse effects, but some of it was still noticeable in his right ear and a little bit crept down onto his neck.
It was a chilling reminder not to dabble in the dark arts.
Nimel swallowed before continuing. “The blackness is not the only...er, negative of the dark magic. Sometimes, I can see and hear things that aren’t truly there. Creatures of darkness, the spirits of the dead...beasts that whisper warnings and threats as I walk by. I can see them, always watching, hiding behind buildings...looming over ordinary people…”
Mayve leaned forward a bit in order to see his face, for not once did he turn his head to look at her. He seemed focused on something far away, staring directly between a pair of trees at the edge of the forest clearing, and, from her position, it looked like his one visible eye was full with fear.
“...And at night, when I sleep, the things I see in my dreams--” his breathing hitched, and he lowered his head and held one side of his face with one hand. It was then that Mayve leaned over again, only this time it was to place a comforting hand on his arm to tell him that he did not have to continue if he truly did not want to. There was another moment of hesitation, and then Nimel placed his hand over hers.
“They’re not just dreams, are they?”
The man shook his head at the question and let out a shuddering breath. He took a moment to gather his thoughts, clearly trying to figure out the best way to continue, and said, “I’ve seen terrible things happening to innocent people. I saw Jordan breaking his legs the night before he fell off his ladder, and I saw Felicity’s shop burn down before the first spark flew. I’m worried, Mayve, because I also saw you, too. Tonight.”
“Me?” The words nearly knocked her from her perch. All seven of Mayve’s eyes widened, fearful to know what the specifics were, but her curiosity got the better of her. “What did you see?”
“I saw darkness,” Nimel answered, slowly and vaguely, carefully choosing his words as though to keep himself from a lapse of calmness. “You and a few others were trapped in a darkness.” He paused and, letting his shoulders droop, finally turned to focus directly at Mayve’s face. There was a look in his one visible eye, something that gave the impression that he was pleading with her. It made her stomach churn with a dread of the unknown, and, as Nimel reached over to place his hands on her shoulders, she wondered if she should sleep with a lantern nearby. “I don’t know what will happen, or when, but promise me--promise me, Mayve--that you will watch out for yourself, no matter what you get yourself into.”
The little imp found herself wondering about how little she really knew about Nimel. He was a strange man that was somewhat of a celebrity throughout Lorandivin, despite his odd habits and his uncanny ability of knowing just about how anything worked (which made him quite the handyman, according to the old lady that ran the Controw Ranch), and plenty of stories about him passed from person to person, although their legitimacy was always up in the air. For example, rumor had it that he seemed, to most, too flippant and too eccentric when it came to the well being of those who were presumably close to him. But Mayve figured that if he truly did not care, he wouldn’t have come all this way to the Fernwill Woods to check in on her.
“Promise,” she answered, and as Nimel took his hands away she placed one of her own palms over her heart and raised the other so it faced outward. “I swear I’ll look out for myself.”
The vow hung in the air for a long moment. Mayve was certain that she was wearing the most serious expression she had ever worn since...well, since a very long time, and Nimel considered her gesture with a sort of scrutiny, until the moment broke when Mayve’s face split into the wide grin she was infamous for.
“But I guess you know how great that will turn out.”
Nimel chuckled and shook his head, relaxing out of the tension that came from their previous conversation. Mayve dropped her clawed hands. “Yes, well,” the man retorted, “I suppose you do have a habit for getting into all sorts of trouble, big and small. Maybe I should hire someone to look out for you.”
“What!” What a ridiculous suggestion! She cried out, offended, “No way! I don’t need a damn babysitter! I’m old enough and mature enough  to look out for m’self, thank you very much!”
The other was laughing now. “So you say, and yet not a day has gone by where I haven’t heard a recent tale of a little, red imp running away from the authorities.” He moved to stand up, brushing off the leaves and twigs that was now clinging to his clothes. “For as long as I’ve known you, even before then, you have always been a troublemaker.”
“I live and breathe trouble, Nims. Trouble’s always gonna be a constant in my life.” Mayve stood as well, and then waved an arm out at the path through the trees. “But hey, what do you say about letting this little troublemaker walk you back to the village?”
“I think I’d say that I would enjoy that.”
As they started the walk back into civilization, Mayve realized that Nimel truly did look comfortable in her presence. She honestly supposed that, when it really came down to it, she did not know that much about him. He was strange, and talked in a funny, weird way--but despite all his oddities and peculiarities, he was her friend, first and foremost. She made him a promise, and to her, promises were the same thing as stolen goods.
They were meant to be kept.
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anti-transphobia · 8 years
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I love you
Im feelin a bit better as in my vision has returned morw (but im gonna lose it ahaij later expect that), its getting easier to typw and im not numb in some places. Thats why i can respond to this. But im still very sick and feel as though im slipping awy from realtty. Mauge im getting close to peace or im fine and my brain has had enough of my bs ans wants me to pass out before i do more dumb shit. Probably a mix of both, in all honestly.
Im still in a lot of pain and if my parents go to work today its likely imm onna be a Dumbass and go pop a few more pills. Bc being stupid is my thing. I put info in my desc and its reqlly long and has no spaces bc fuckij timblr mobile but if you skim to the @terfspart which contains my request which i reqly hope everyone, not just terfs, reqtest. Everything under @terfsis whwt i consider tue mpstnimportwnt pwrt.
The beginning is just info og someone wnars a quick, so carwfully typed to be understaneqble explanati on of whwt happened to me.
I thank people like you a lot. i dont think people care even tho my fp saw what i thought woupd be my last message to her for a whioe (shw saos she wwe goin to sleep i didnt thibk shed see until it wwlas too late) ans helped me. It was reqlly sinple whwt she did ajd it wasnt eveb on purpose. She kept me distracted long enough to where i couldbt get mpre pills bc my body wws destroyed enouth to stop functionijg.
It doewnt wouns like she helped but by talkiny me lont enough to distracr me she let the pills i took do what they were supposed to do which stopped me from getting more which woulsve hurt me more. Its a reminder thst even over the internet, you may not eb able to stop soleone from hurting themsepves but you can stop it from veing as bad as it could have been. if i remember ill make a post abt that on its own in a few days.
I used your ask to rant a bit. Ididnt mean to, sorry. But whwt i www gettint at with thwt last bit is thst while it may not have made a HUGE impact on me, the asks and messages, especially alone, alltogether it dir in te long run. While its not a guratnee somethiny thars always worked tor me is keepiny the suicidal person busy. I dont kbow if they wouldbe succeeeed or not regardless of whether i wwe there or not, but i dont regret helping and no one has died ans the amoint someone has hurt themselbes when i try to help them is quite limited. Im lucky. Its quite scary when its someone you care abt (like max i yry to help him out when i see it im just parwbois and almsot alwyas on anon when i do it), but its scary either way and even if you try dont feel bad if you cant help them.
Theres still time and opportunities for me to die later on tonight and in life by my own hand. But for now? You and people like you have saved my life. I amy not be typiy this right now if it wwasnt for the support that i felt and mayve you guys felt wasnt enough and didnt help but overall it did. My head is a bit clearer now and i can accept thqt. Youd think bc of it id become immune to the tactic and ignore it but for the most part ignroiny ppl is not me.
Im 65% sure i mentioned rambling in this answer. Im 100% sure basically ive mentioned this is a side affect of overdosage on this particular medicine, for me at least. Im pretty sure i know whu too but ir i dont try to restrain myself more my phone will die before i do and before this ask is published. Another affect is it worsens my memory to the EXTREME so i WILL repeat things ans ask for claritication often and i do not have control over that.
God one reqwon i wqnt to kms is because of long rambles like this but i cant even stop after tryiny to kill myself.
TL;DR (bc lets be honest if youre mentwlly ill or disabled you probably didnt fi youre anythiny like me): i love you too anon. thank you. you an everyone else who tried to help. even if on your own it isnt enough, together youve kept me alive this long even if its only for the next hour or two. your help does make a difference.
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