#me: so that was the most amazing and most chaotic thing in caleb's life!!

[nikatyler]

Every time I explain the Caleb alien pregnancy thing, I revert back to being 17 and my brain just goes "hehehe mommy" until I stop talking about it

[mooneloquence]

"you are the peace i crave in this chaotic world." or/and ❛ the most beautiful part is, i wasn’t even looking when i found you. ❜ for shadowgast? 👀

Hooooly fjuck, this got extremely out of hand. These prompts were so lovely, I couldn't help but want to use them both for this. After making myself (and apparently other people) cry with this, I needed a little bit of crack treated seriously and (quite a bit of) fluff, and these phrases had HUGE wedding vows vibes👀

Sorry this took so long, I've been studying for my finals and life has been busy. Thank you for the prompt! (Also, I need to say that I adore your art! Your textures are amazing, and looking at your pieces makes me so happy) Hope you enjoy 💜I'm still taking prompts from here, send me an ask! (I intend to go through all of them, though they may take me a while to fill)

You are the peace I crave in this chaotic world. // The most beautiful part is, I wasn't even looking when I found you. (2.2k words, G)

In retrospect, it was easy to see why holding their wedding aboard the Nein Heroez was not the greatest idea, but Essek believed it was worth it just to experience the full chaos and unpredictability characteristic of the Mighty Nein. He knew he should have probably been worried to even think that way—he'd spent almost all his life in relative comfort and peace—but perhaps the Nein had more of an effect on him than he knew.

Only a day ago, Caleb and him had attempted to announce their engagement to the rowdy bunch in the quietest way possible: after dinner, Essek had approached Caduceus and murmured something to him that had made the firbolg smile in that placid way of his. It did not take long for Beauregard—whose ability to read lips he had not accounted for, and who was very, very drunk—to gasp loudly enough to catch the attention of the rest of the group before shouting, "MOTHERFUCKER." She shot a look of betrayal at the other human, who almost choked on his beer, startled. "You're getting married and you didn't tell me?"

At the word 'married,' Jester perked up, her eyes wide and full of stars, and several things happened at the same time. There was a screech that could come from no other than Veth, Fjord looked around the room in an attempt to understand what was happening, Kingsley's eyes widened before he smirked, and Yasha’s eyes went to Essek as her face formed into a soft smile.

Ah, there went their plan to tell them separately or in small groups.

And then, Caduceus, with not even a glint of malice in his eye, decided to add a little more chaos into the mix.

"I will gladly officiate the ceremony."

Everything that ensued after that was a bit of a whirlwind in his mind, but thankfully things had calmed down significantly by the time Jester approached to give him a hug. It definitely seemed like more than five years since she had done that for the first time, and by now Essek could return the gesture with a genuine, if small, smile without even flinching.

"Congrats, you guys. I'm so excited for you! Are you happy?"

"Yes, Jester, I am very happy. And thank you." Still, there was something in her expression that caught his eye when they pulled apart. It was strange, to be able to see the way others masked their emotions behind something else. "Is there something wrong?" he asked, careful to turn away from where Beau was standing with her arm around Caleb’s shoulder.

Her smile faltered for only a millisecond. "Oh, it's nothing." At his raised brow, she let her face grow more serious and looked down, becoming thoughtful for a moment. "I am a cleric, too, you know?"

Essek's eyes widened with understanding. Caleb and him had hoped to keep this ceremony a secret, just something quiet for them before Essek needed to go away again after their reunion, but had talked about a 'proper' wedding later on, something with all their friends there—perhaps even Verin. But now that the secret was out, there was no harm in asking Jester what he would have in the future.

"I know. But if you perform the ceremony, who is going to stand by my side?"

Her eyes lit up again, the smile that bloomed on her face making her blue freckles dance on her cheeks. This time, her hug squeezed the air right out of him with an undignified oof—even after years, he was still caught off-guard by her strength.

"Ohmygosh, Essek! Of course I will be by your side!"

It was Fjord who piped up next and asked, "So when is the wedding?"

A look was exchanged between the two wizards.

"Ah, we were originally thinking tonight, but... maybe tomorrow?" said Caleb.

"What?"

"Tomorrow?!"

"You guys, we don't even have fancy outfits for the occasion!"

Thinking back on it, the commotion that answer had caused paled in comparison to what transpired about fifty minutes into the Ceremony.

They were on the deck of the Nein Heroez, Caduceus standing near the bow of the ship, one hand covering Essek and Caleb’s joint hands. To Essek's right was Jester, who had somehow managed to get them all the fanciest outfits she could with such short notice. (Teleport was an incredibly useful spell.) Her proud smile and mildly watery eyes hadn't faltered since the start of the hour-long spell. To Caleb’s left stood Beauregard, whose electric blue eyes were not misty at all. The hour needed to cast Ceremony was almost over when Kingsley's voice came from the crow's nest,

"Captain, we have a small island coming towards us!"

Essek, who had only heard the story of the time when the Nein had been chased by a dragon turtle, frowned at the strange phrasing, but the realization hit him as he looked around to see that, effectively, there was something that resembled an island approaching the ship, still far away, but steadily becoming larger in the distance.

Caduceus tightened his hold on them, but otherwise kept steadily murmuring the prayer to the Wildmother that was nearing its end.

In less than twenty seconds, everyone except the three of them necessary for the completion of the spell had taken their respective places, the calm mood switching almost immediately to the tense bustle of action. Jester and Orly stood mostly where they were, ready to cast or help as needed, Veth and Yasha ran below deck to ready the cannons, Beauregard remaining on the stairs between the two decks to relay Fjord's orders. The half orc in question had taken his place at the helm of the ship, both captain and first mate shouting instructions to the rest of the crew as the sails were unfurled so the Nein Heroez could start moving again.

Even having traveled with them already, the drow could not help but be impressed by the swift efficiency the Mighty Nein displayed in dire situations. When he turned his gaze back to Caleb, he found him looking at him with a faintly apologetic smile; Essek smiled as well. There was a small velvet pouch clutched in Caduceus' other hand, his staff useless to him if he intended to complete the Ceremony. Caleb's left hand—not his casting hand, but it would have to do until the end of the spell—and Essek's right were poised at the ready by their sides.

The next few minutes were tense as the ship slowly kicked into motion, the fairly steady wind working in their favor, but not nearly enough to outpace the powerful swimming of a vengeful dragon turtle whose figure continued to grow bigger and bigger. With a muttered curse, Beauregard ran back onto the deck and opened her fan with a whip of her wrist before bringing it down in the direction of the sails. The Gust of Wind gave them an intense boost, and Essek's hand shot out to steady the cushion upon which two rings and two earrings were placed before anything could roll away and get lost in the depths of the Lucidian Ocean. At some point, Jester ran towards the stern of the ship, and some of her words drifted towards them,

"Hey... having a wedding here... this for... -ther day? Unless... you wanna... with us? Doo doo..." A few seconds passed before she relayed to them, "I don't think he's stopping, not even for the wedding. He's kind of a dick."

By then, Caduceus' prayer was nearing its end, and even with the speed they were moving at, their pursuer came close enough for the stern chasers to fire. The loud explosion rang in Essek's ears for a moment, muffling what the firbolg had just asked them. His lack of an answer seemed to be enough for him to repeat it, "Is there something you would like to say or to promise each other as part of the ritual?"

They looked at each other. The night of their engagement a couple of months prior, they had already talked in private and told each other exactly how they felt. Many promises had been made and kept since a night long ago on a different ship—one that had fallen to the very same creature chasing them—but, even in the face of imminent danger, to not say anything still felt lackluster.

With a shaky intake of breath, Caleb’s hand tightened its hold on his under the protective cover of Caduceus' large, warm palm. The cannons fired another round. "Essek," the human started, "I will try to make this brief, but I wanted to say something. You are my friend and my colleague, my mirror in so many ways, and yet so different in so many others. I am so proud of you." Something pink flashed in the distance, but they kept their eyes locked onto each other. "You never cease to amaze me; your mind and your heart are precious, and I am equally baffled and honored to know that you want to share them with me." His brow was furrowed in that particular way that indicated he was speaking from his heart. "Mein schatz, mein Mondlicht. Meine Freude. It would make me the luckiest man alive to love you for as long as my heart beats, and more."

Essek's free hand darted up to wipe a tear that threatened to roll down his cheek, his mouth upturned in a soft smile. He breathed in as well, nodding. "Caleb." The three of them stumbled as the ship rocked violently under the assault of the gargantuan turtle, and Essek interrupted what he was saying to thrust his hand out in a frantic rendition of the somatic component for Magic Missile—many of his more powerful spells required the use of both hands, and he couldn't let go of his lover's hand. The small beams of force collided against their foe's shell, chipping and cracking it in places.

Caduceus, who had tilted the contents of the tiny pouch to let the powdered silver cover the earrings and rings, let go of their hands and lifted the small cushion. Releasing each other they took the earrings first; one golden and the other one silver, both with a single amber teardrop dangling from the hook portion. With no time to delay in contemplation, they exchanged the earrings and slipped them into the right earlobes. The rings were next. Taking the drow's left hand and the band with a black pearl framed by two silver ends that curled around it one from the top and one from the bottom, Caleb slipped it onto his ring finger. Essek took the other ring, matching in design except for the gold that comprised the band and the white pearl that replaced the black one.

"Caleb," he repeated, "You already know what you are to me. I was a lost man before you came into my life, and definitely changed it for the better. Even if I considered myself a visionary, I was still blind to so much, and I am eternally grateful to you and the Mighty Nein for showing me that. I think... I think the most beautiful part is, I was not even looking when I found you."

Another cannon shot, and the Nein Heroez rocked again, not as harshly this time. Around them, the air was filled with different voices shouting orders, arcane phrases and divine incantations of different sorts. Swinging his left arm in a wide arc, Caleb's voice joined the cacophony before several rays of fire shot out from his fingers and impacted right on the creature's eye.

Smiling and wholly aware of the irony of the situation, he continued, "Against all odds, you are the peace I crave in this chaotic world, my home to come back to, the fire that thaws me when I think I'm growing too cold. The time I get to spend with you is a greater gift than I ever believed I deserved, and I will honor that for as long as I have memory." The next time the ship rocked, it was accompanied by the horrible sound of wood moaning and shattering under great stress. They both looked around. "I will tell you the rest when this is over," he promised, taking his husband-to-be's hand and slipping the ring onto his finger.

Even in the dire situation, Caduceus smiled. "This is nice. You are now wed under the protection of the Wildmother. You may kiss if you like, but we really need to get into the battle, things aren't looking very pretty."

Both wizards' expressions became sheepish. With one hand, Caleb took the back of Essek's neck and pressed his forehead to his, blue eyes boring into violet ones, and pressed a single peck onto his lips. "We can have the rest when this is over. We've got time, Mister Widogast."

"Indeed, Caleb Widogast. We've got time."

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E123 (Feb. 2, 2021)

After last week’s thoroughly relaxing and brief episode, tonight’s guests are Sam Riegel and Liam O’Brien!

Brian, to Sam: “You look like Tim Curry moved to Nantucket to become a sommelier.”

How did Caleb and Veth approach the ally-ship with the Tombtakers? Sam: “I mean, we got some information, and I think we got a little closer to Lucien and knowing whether he has any of Mollymauk inside of him, which is I think the most important knowledge that we’re seeking right now. Is there someone to be saved inside there? We got glimpses, and we got a little hint that Mollymauk is maybe still in there? Maybe? And we got a little more insight into their plans, so that was useful.” Liam: “We know why we were having that fucking dream.” Sam: “But other than that, it was just a road trip with assholes.” Liam: “All our plans have been ripped in a new direction, and it’s just been improvisation.” Sam notes that it feels like we’re always about to rip into Caleb’s backstory, but haven’t yet followed that thread all the way through. Liam: “It’s partially frustrating, to be sure, but also I like the idea that-- his whole shit has been selfish, it’s been dealing with the trauma that he’s been through and not the greater world, and that’s been shifting somewhat.”

Does Caleb think the book was worth it, and is he still interested in reading more? Sam: “How do you ask Caleb not to read a book?” Liam: “Caleb has spent enough time with the Nein to know you shouldn’t put a hand on a hot stove. After what happened with the book, he knows it’s a terrible idea. But maybe. But it’s a really bad idea. But reserve judgment, but it’s a really terrible idea. I think that Caleb is very aware that mages and people like him very easily fall prey to their curiosity and it can lead to bad places. But there is still that amount of scientific endeavor where you think there is value in knowing and learning, and maybe we can ride that line. He was True Neutral at the start of the campaign, and maybe he’s Chaotic Good now, but part of him is hubris, even if it’s a little bit, still.”

What about Otis has drawn Veth’s focus? Sam: “I mean, he’s a little shit. She was curious about Otis because he’s a small like she is, and in talking to him, he seemed to be real creepy, but he was just creepy and distant and didn’t value his past or family or anything like that. She sees someone who’s like her, but so not like her, and maybe that scares her a little bit more.”

How does Caleb feel about Beau being on this ride with him? Liam: “The dream is another example of how Caleb had very narrow vision of the things he wanted to do. It used to seem so massive to him, but now... To have Beauregard involved feels right. If anyone in the group is going to stop him from grabbing something he shouldn’t, it is probably Beauregard. She’ll punch him in the fucking face to stop him, which I think he needs, to a certain extent. They’re two different kinds of nerds, and I kind of like that, that this group of nine philosophers, they’ve reached out and somehow grabbed the two nerds in the party.”

How do Caleb and Veth see the Somnovum? Sam: “I mean, they seem real bad. Anything that’s a quorum of powerful entities heading towards your planet to unleash an energy of any kind, typically bad? I assume they’re bad, or at least the Tombtakers wish them to do ill.” Liam: “I think they want the kind of peace that comes from snapping your fingers and turning people to dust. Caleb sees them as a cautionary tale; they’re the worst-case scenario for arcane inquisitiveness.” He sees Allura Vysoren as the antidote to that.

Why the staunch refusal to use Halfling Luck? Sam: “I don’t like Luck! I just don’t like Luck. I think it’s cheap, I think it’s a cheat, I think it’s stupid. It just feels like a do-over.” Liam: “I am your antithesis! If I ever voice a halfling, I am going to hammer that feature!” Sam: “What I love about D&D is that you don’t know what’s going to happen. If you roll bad, okay, that’s it. If you roll well, it makes the success more enjoyable to know that it’s a pure success and don’t one where you’re like well actually... it’s so stupid. If someone was about to die, I would probably use the fuckin’ Luck feature. Well. It depends who. If it was Travis, yeah, no, he’s fucked, sorry.”

Liam drops that he’s picked Sam’s character class and race again for a hypothetical campaign three. Sam: “It’s not what I was thinking for future characters, but I’m excited to explore.”

Cosplay of the Week: an amazing Mollymauk by KatofValkyrie!

What was it like to bring the Tombtakers into the tower? Liam: “It is complicated, because he does not like him. Lucien’s just a fucking dick. But Caleb also knows that Molly’s in there somewhere. That tower’s only for the M9, and Lucien’s not in the M9. Their situation with these people is shitty, it’s terrible. Caleb doesn’t feel like they have the upper hand. He doesn’t like that they’re even going on this journey per se, because life is bigger than his bullshit. He feels like they’ve been losing over and over again, so it was a gamble to try to get on equal footing.

What spurred Veth into making sure she and Yasha have some one-on-one time? Sam: “Yasha hasn’t been getting a lot of moments to shine. Now that she’s back, I just got the impression that Yasha feels out of place sometimes, or timid, or unsure of herself. When Veth was Nott, Nott certainly had her share of those moments. I think she sees a kindred spirit and wants to make sure that she’s been giving all the opportunity she can to flourish and thrive. Dani, you’re just laughing at my mustache, aren’t you?” Dani: “Yes, that’s the only thing I’m laughing at through this whole bullshit.” Sam denies all knowledge of trolling, but eventually admits, on the topic of Yasha and Beau getting together: “They’ve made me wait this long... I’m going to make them wait a little bit longer!”

What was it like to show his friends the upper floors? Liam: “I kinda expected somebody to sneak up there before that. That being part of the tower is not even a conscious choice of his, it just is. The reason Caduceus has creeped Caleb out for a long time is because he talks about how-- Caduceus is a really kind person and wants Caleb to let go of the past. And in a really simplistic way, turn that frown upside-down. And that’s just not who Caleb is, and it’s not who everybody is. There is something to be said for trying to stay open and positivity, but thinking you can shut out the past, especially a traumatic one, is just not true. When things happen to us, we carry them. But to candy-coat it and say, ah, I’m free, or everything is good, or I’ve turned the corner... life is way messier than that. It’s not flipping a switch, it’s not bad-to-good, it is such a work in progress. Even when you make strides and start to get to a better place, you can backslide a lot. So the tower is who he is, and the tower is 7/9ths love for his friends, and 1/9th hope, but there’s still a percentage of him that carries everything from the past, and knows that he should, and knows that he should not go back to where he was. And the way to do that is not to say everything is rainbows, but to remember it. The tower is just like an extension of who he is. He’s never going to forget the past, and he’s never going to be like, I’m good, or I’ve turned a corner. He should remember the past, and he should do better, always.”

Does Veth still believe it’s possible to get Molly back? Sam: “Well, she was a person trapped in another body for many years, so has some experience there, and definitely believes that the spirit and soul of Molly is in there and just needs to be unlocked somehow.”

Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot by HarpySN!

How are Caleb and Veth dealing with their guilt and fear about being in the middle of this? Sam: “It definitely was a deep conversation that might have repercussions going forward. The problem with all of what we’re doing now is that we don’t have time to deal with our petty problems anymore. It’s all high tension all the time!” Liam: “It’s true; they’re not in control of their situation at all anymore.” Sam: “It’s good to have these check-ins, but it’s not like we can do anything about them. We’re reactive right now.” Liam: “He’s not happy with where they are, but they wouldn’t even be this far if the goblin hadn’t pulled him out of the mud. So part of it is, you saved me from where I was and got me on my feet again, and now it’s disconcerting to see it all just get knocked sideways by something he never could’ve predicted. I think Caleb felt nostalgic for when things were simpler, in a way, for them, when we’re both troubled drifters.”

What was it like to see Gelidon’s return? Liam: “I am the least superstitious person at the table. Ashley’s dice suck.” Sam: “It was fun fighting a dragon!” Liam: “Two massive battles in one episode, neither of which came away with a victory. I guess surviving is a victory.” Sam: “I’d forgotten about the dragon, honestly.” Liam: “I loved it. I was so upset at the idea that we were going to stealth and not get into it.”Sam: “Mercer doesn’t keep a live dragon around and not do something with it. That dragon’s coming back.”

How do Caleb and Veth feel about going to see Essek? Sam: “He can be very helpful, I believe, but as Sam Riegel, a player of D&D, I’m super suspicious. What the fuck is Essek doing up there, so close, now? I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him. And I can throw him pretty far because he floats.” Liam: “I 100% agree with you. I do not understand what Essek could bring to what we are going through. I know the audience loves him, I love him too. He’s a really cool character. But he’s fucking toxic. He out of curiosity caused a war between two nations. And Caleb has been changed for the good by the M9 from months of travel with them. Essek has had none of that. Caleb has changed for the good, but not because of people like Essek. Essek is where Caleb came from. We kept the lid on the pot during the whole treaty at sea and it almost all went fucking sideways, and only because we pressed him into a corner. I hope that guy finds some sort of balance and peace for himself, but I do not see how his input here would be helpful. There’s other heavy hitters that I would try to pull in.”

Liam notes that the Cloven Crystal is in the Bag of Holding. Sam: “Do I have Fluffernutter, or is Fluffernutter gone?” Liam: “Nope. 300 pounds of fireworks? Gone. A dead mage, a threshold crest, and fireworks.” Dani: “Your basic essentials.”

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 292: You Say Jeans

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “well anyway here’s that Touya reveal I foreshadowed like a million years ago, viva la 2020.” Dabi was all “hello world, I’ve killed 30 people and today I’m going to explain to you all why” before he proceeded to explain ABSOLUTELY NOTHING but everyone was so distracted by his tale of child abuse and hero conspiracies that they didn’t much seem to notice. Can’t Ya See-Kun’s Shark Friend was all “IS THIS THE END OF HERO SOCIETY AS WE KNOW IT”, and Horikoshi was all “STAY TUNED”, and then Dabi set himself on fire and leaped off of Machia’s back like the chaotic evil, I-just-bleached-all-my-brain-cells weird little fire man he is, ready to burn everyone to crispy bits before they could even react properly to his whole big revenge speech. Fortunately he did not succeed on account of THE RETURN OF THE JING, THE JOAT, BEST FUCKING JEANIST, back from the dead by popular demand in what critics are calling “the best fucking comeback since Jesus himself.”

Today on BnHA: Best Jeanist snatches up Machia and the rest of the League with his fiber steel cables before you can say “more like BEAST JEANIST amirite.” Dabi gets all worked up and lights Hadou on fire which is a real JERK MOVE, and is all “THIS RIGHT HERE IS ALSO ENDEAVOR’S FAULT”, which, NOT SUPER CONVINCED ON THAT, BUT OKAY. Anyway so then he burns up all the cables holding him which is crazeballs btw, and then he and Shouto start fighting, and so basically the whole thing is a literal hot mess and we’ll see how that goes. Meanwhile Tomura wakes up and summons some Noumus, and poor Jeanist has to deal with those on top of the still-attempting-to-rampage Gigantomachia, and everyone else is all “we can’t help you on account of we’re all half dead”, and so it’s looking really bad. And then -- and I can’t stress enough how much I don’t even have the faintest idea how to segue into this next part -- the chapter ends with Mirio!?! just sort of POPPING UP OUT OF THE GROUND all, “SURPRISE, BITCH”, and it literally was so surprising that I am still just kind of speechless. WELL-PLAYED, I GUESS, lol wtf.

lol okay so the first page in the RHA scan is just the “three musketeers” movie promo image that we all already saw a few days ago. but it does confirm that (a) it is indeed a movie, and (b) that it’s set for a summer 2021 release! how exciting

okay so now back to our special Dabi edition of Making a Murderer

“ray of hope” oh hell yes. SAVE US MR. JEANIST

I guess he had a TV in his private hero jet or something?

gotta say, “dammit Dabi” does not even remotely sound like Authentic Best Jeanist Dialogue to me though. gonna need Caleb to see to this. well but what do you guys think? does Best Jeanist curse?? I personally feel like he’s one of those guys who NEVER EVER swears no matter what, except under the most hilariously trifling circumstances. like he’s eating an avocado one day and he accidentally stains the cuffs of his beloved jostume green and he’s all “FUCK”

btw how fucking rich is Best Jeanist though that he has his own fucking plane? the thought just suddenly occurred to me, you know? like even Endeavor, whose agency has its own on-site luxury apartment suites for all of his interns, still drives around in a dinky little car that Bakugou has declared to be too small. which, I guess we know why he felt that way now, seeing as the guy he previously interned with apparently gets around in Jeans Force One

anyway so back to the part where Jeanist shows up to save the day!! YEAH JEANIST WOOOOO

ILU JEANIST YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST!! HUGS AND KISSES!!!

lmao we just saw Gigantomachia take out like a hundred guys not ten chapters ago. and Best Jeanist shows up and takes him down in like two seconds. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES LEAGUE OF VILLAINS. BET YOU’RE WISHING YOU’D TAKEN HIS QUIRK NOW, AFO. GET FUCKED YOU OLD SPUD

KACCHAN IS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM AWW

SIDE NOTE, IIDA, YOU AND I ARE GONNA HAVE WORDS LATER ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY AGREEING TO PUT HIM BACK DOWN. YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT THIS CHILD IS STILL DRIPPING BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE FROM HIS MULTIPLE STAB WOUNDS, RIGHT? WAY TO ASSERT YOUR AUTHORITY THERE. I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE CLASS PRESIDENT NOT THE CLASS CLOWN, COME ON NOW

LMAO DABI IS FRANTICALLY TRYING TO DO THE PLOT MATH

SHOULDA CHECKED MORE CLOSELY MY GOOD MARK. LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED THE “MADE IN CHINA” STICKER ON THE BOTTOM. YOU HAVE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. OR ACTUALLY, I GUESS THE MORE ACCURATE WORD HERE IS JAMBOOZLED, AHAHAHAHA. JEANS

HOLY SHIT DABI

I legit almost thought that was Tomura for a second. you two look so alike now with the white hair and the crazy eyes

meanwhile, Shouto is still crying and it’s a lot to take, you guys. lotta feels

ffff come on Jeanist you better do something awesome again here, the mood of the chapter is starting to slip now

YES, GOOD, THAT’LL WORK

WELL YOU TELL ME, SPINNER. I GUESS THAT MEANS BEST JEANIST IS OFFICIALLY THE STRONGEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES NOW. SORRY I DON’T MAKE THE RULES

ffff now Spinner is trying to wake Tomura back up. nah, how’s about we not do that

OH MY GOD HADOU YESSSS

MY GIRL OUT HERE WITH THE “NO THANK YOU” BOUT TO CURBSTOMP THE BIG BAD WITH HER QUIRK KSFHLKLK WHO HERE HAD “HADOU SAVES THE DAY” ON YOUR WAR ARC BINGO CARDS, YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!!

HEY!!!!

fucking son of a... fffkfkff... someone please reassure me that fire isn’t Hadou’s weakness. someone. anyone. also could someone please dial an ambulance and send them to Horikoshi’s house. but not just yet. first I’m gonna need you to wait about fifteen minutes or so while I take care of some things

well all right then, Dabi. so you wanna go on then and explain to us all how this, too, is somehow Endeavor’s fault?

oh I see, you’ve decided that since he’s responsible for “creating” you, everyone you hurt and kill is in truth really being hurt and killed by him! well now, that sure is convenient as fuck I guess

(ETA: that’s a nice effect with the panel sides getting all warped by Dabi’s quirk though, just noticed that.)

amazing how quickly you used up that sympathy card my guy. Shouto please kick his ass, I’m fucking done lol, you can all sort out the rest in therapy later

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE DIAL BACK DEKU’S EMPATHY STATS JUST A LITTLE BIT, HOLY --

“TODOROKI-KUN IS HURT THE MOST”, HE SAYS, WITH HIS ARM BONES SHATTERED INTO LITTLE TOOTHPICK-SIZED PIECES. I MEAN, HE’S PROBABLY TALKING MORE ABOUT MENTAL ANGUISH GIVEN THE CONTEXT HERE, BUT STILL. THAT’S ENOUGH HEROICS FROM YOU ALREADY FOR ONE DAY

NOOO JEANIST

LOTS OF SMOKE IN THE AIR RIGHT ABOUT NOW AND MY BOY’S STILL DOWN A LUNG. GOD DAMMIT

“if the number one suffers a total loss here, this country will fall to pieces” well okay, real talk though, I think the “country falling to pieces” part is pretty much unavoidable at this juncture. you all are just gonna have to try your best to pick up those pieces after the fact and see what you can do with them. if I were you I’d be less worried about the number one’s reputation and more concerned with the half-dozen child soldier interns who are still on the field and very much at risk of being burned to death should you suffer that “total loss.” please try to keep it together here for them

OH FOR FUCK’S

I really thought RockLockRock was gonna come into play here. USE YOUR QUIRK TO LOCK THE ROPES IN PLACE YOU DIP!! if he seriously just sits there and does nothing when his quirk could be the deciding factor I am cancelling his useless ass cute kid or no cute kid shfkjdls

(ETA: is he even there?? did he and Manual just hightail it out of there?? “well good luck, children.”)

also, we’ll put this aside for now to perhaps speculate about later, but what’s with Tomura remembering his dad’s house yet again in that far right panel?? and being itchy again?? I still have yet to fully work out the psychological mechanisms at work as far as his itchiness goes, so I’ll admit this is intriguing to me. it seemed like it was connected to his decay quirk, but then why is it acting up again now. what is this lol

yuh oh

forgot about these guys. looks like these heroes aren’t having such a fun time

oh fucksticks

excuse me ma’am but I don’t like this. you do know that my kids are all there, right. all burnt and impaled and broken-boned and the like. well except for Iida. he’s fine still. BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN I FEEL LIKE WATCHING HIM GET TORN APART BY FOUR HIGH ENDS, WTF

HORIKOSHI YOU MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

god fucking... okay look. Horikoshi. you win, okay!? congratulations, you win, this is your show and we’re all just sitting here at your mercy. fine. go ahead and just kill off everyone ever, then!! what am I even gonna do about it. stop reading?? fuck

this whole thing really went from zero to fucked before I could even blink huh. I really thought this was gonna be a turning point chapter for the heroes. shows what I know I guess??

meanwhile this motherfucker is just SCREAMING

ngl, if I wasn’t currently terrified on account of things suddenly taking such a drastic turn for the worse, this would be the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Jeanist my man, I hype you up like it’s my job because you are the greatest fucking meme character in the history of time, but make no mistake, you are also highkey WORTH ALL THE HYPE AND THEN SOME

seriously, though. don’t fucking mind him you guys, he’s just standing here in the coolest pose of all time taking on Gigantomachia all alone with one fucking lung because the substance pumping through his veins is COLD-BLOODED LIQUID DENIM, and DENIM FEELS NO FEAR

Best Jeanist really needs to get his own theme song. -- oh my god I just finally thought of a title for this post. lmao and it’s the dumbest thing. omg

MEANWHILE THE TODOROKI BROS ARE OFF IN THEIR OWN DRAMATIC LITTLE FIRE WORLD

which one do you think is the Mario and which is the Luigi. well, but I mean, Dabi clearly thinks that he’s the Luigi though and that’s why he’s so mad. nobody wants to be Luigi. what a life

THAT’S IT, SHOUTO!! POINT OUT ALL OF HIS HYPOCRITICAL BULLSHIT, I WANT ANSWERS

JUST TO CLARIFY, IT’S THAT NATSU, NOT SOME OTHER NATSU!! SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!!

OH, WELL IN THAT CASE

BUT OF COURSE. THAT WOULD MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE, holy shit. okay I’m just gonna go ahead and say it, Dabi is a piece of work. I really thought this arc would make him more sympathetic at long last, but it seems like it’s doing just the opposite?? this is like an anti-redemption arc. I don’t relish the thought of venturing into the fandom tags once I finish reading this lol

(ETA: well folks, I’ve done it. and actually it was pretty interesting because there are apparently like ten different things that people are mad about, and so it’s like. each post is a new adventure lmao.)

so Shouto is all “BRUH HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST IT” and Dabi is all “YES”, basically? like, he says he’s completely lost his feeling for anything. omg. but you were so sweet. how does that even happen

“finally I can kill you” okay for real what the heck is your damage bro?? can we not. I like Shouto just the way he is, un-killed

oh shit and now the Noumus are here

cue Bakugou diving in to save his mentor, STAB WOUNDS BE DAMNED!! actually it would make more sense for it to be Iida, but if Kacchan is really fixin’ to go full Shounen Dumbass here then he might as well go all out, y’know

-- unless of course, Deku decides to activate another quirk??

“last I checked, the main character of this series was still me” OH? WELL I SUPPOSE THAT IS TRUE, SO PRAY TELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT LEFT UP YOUR SLEEVE YOU SUICIDAL BRUSSELS SPROUT

fucking love how he’s all “HAHAHA WITH MY NEW QUIRKS I CAN STILL DO STUPID SHIT EVEN WITH MY ARMS AND LEGS GROUND TO A FINE POWDER” btw. what can I say. Deku gonna Deku

FMMFHDKUHK W H A T

HOLY SHIT. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WHAT THE WHAT. QUE THE FUCK

(ETA: okay look, all the love in the world to the brave scanlators who take time out of their lives to translate the leaks every week just so we can read the chapter a couple of days early like the addicts we are. that said, translating Mirio’s signature “POWER!!” -- which was already written in English in the original scan -- to “POG-CHAMP” is just a whole new level of wtfuckery from them lmao. is the Lida person back at it again?? amazing.)

MIRIO!?!?! SHOWS UP TO SAVE THE DAY?!?! POGS HIMSELF UP OUT THE GROUND TO BEAT THE NOUMUS LIKE IT AIN’T NO THING. JUST LIKE WE ALL PREDICTED!? I’M SORRY, DID YOU NOT SEE THAT COMING?? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOUR DAILY HOROSCOPE FROM ASTROLOGY DOT COM DIDN’T HAVE THAT ONE IN THE CARDS?? WAS IT NOT OBVIOUS?? TODOROKIS PLUS BEST JEANIST EQUALS MIRIO??

hot damn. Tintin really saw the writing on the wall with the impending Dabi Discourse and was all “NOT SO FAST” lmao. “HERE’S A BRAND NEW THING FOR YOU ALL TO DISCOURSE ABOUT” MIRIO YOU WILD CHILD. YOU GLORIOUS THUG

MEANWHILE LET’S NOT FORGET WHAT MIRIO HAVING HIS POWERS BACK ACTUALLY IMPLIES. HOLY SHIT. SUDDENLY WE CUT BACK TO ALL MIGHT’S OFFICE, ALL THE WAY BACK AT UA. ERI BRANDISHES HER TOKOYAMI-GIFTED BUSTER SWORD, A DETERMINED GLEAM IN HER EYE. “I HEARD YOU WERE TRYING TO HAVE A GIRL POWER ARC WITHOUT ME.” OH. MY. GOD

[heartslogos]

newfragile yellows [1112]

The idea that the large mountain of a man with his sloping gut and sagging arms, his quivering jowls and the curled stiff veined hands, was once someone to be feared is a hard one to keep steady. It seems easier to think of him as an old man with eccentric tastes, who likes to tell stories that are just stories rather than memory.

Intellectually speaking, Caleb knows that the man he’s got in the back seat of his van is imoprtant. This man is one of the founding members of the Inquisition. This man was one of their top agents for all manner of mission. And even before then, as an agent of the Qun, this man was a one-stop for every problem to be fixed.

The list of reports and incidents that reference this man, even in passing, fill Inquisition data bases. Caleb has read several of them. It would be hard not to. Several of those reports are training documents. Everyone nows the Iron Bull and the things he’s done and the things he’s capable of. Even as old as he is now, even retired, there is still something sharp about him. But it only catches when you make eye contact.

Otherwise, he's just a very large old man in a button up polo and khakis. He could be anyone’s fun grandpa. Hell. Caleb thinks that his own grandpa has the same shirt. He’ll swear that he’s seen it worn to family barbecues.

Right now the man is holding his phone nearly at arms length, squinting at the screen before swearing under his breath and jabbing at it.

The phone’s speaker begins to ring and after a moment a voice on the other end picks up.

“So no Ellana."

"No Ellana,” the Iron Bull confirms. “Malika’s doing her best. But you know how things get if Ellana’s involved.”

“They get fucked.”

It’s strange to hear former Inquisitor Evelyn Trevelyan talk so frankly. She’s visited the Inquisition bases a few times. Usually to celebrate some kind of anniversary or big event. Everyone loves it when she comes. You can tell that she used to be a professor — and would have been a very amazing one too, if she didn’t end up founding the Inquisition. That’s one big career move. Everyone always asks her about it and she’s always very patient about explaining the entire terrible and chaotic and apparently accidental process.

Sera, when she's so inclined to speak of it, summarizes it quite neatly.

“Trevelyan’s got a problem. And that problem is she can’t keep her nose out of shit it doesn’t belong in because she’s got terrible is-no-one-going-to-do-this-guess-I-have-to syndrome.”

“Right. So. Maybe we have to bring the old crew back together for this one. You have to feel for the kid. One week from retirement.”

“I don’t know why she bothers. We all know she’ll end up consulting afterwards anyway. It’s the fate of every former Inquisition member. You think you leave but you end up being called for help and advice anyway. Next thing you know your entire contact list is just new and former Inquisition members and you’re all talking shop like you never quit.”

“No, no. That’s just you. Ellana and I do fine in retirement. I’ve got a group I meet up with to play chess with every two weeks. I’ve even got a chess by mail thing going. Ellana has book club. Sometimes we go on cruises and make friends with other seniors. Ever do a river cruise? Relaxing stuff. I can book you one if you want. We’ve got a gold membership. Discounts are great. And after I get Ellana back I’m going to lock her in our house for about a month until I feel secure in the knowledge that she won’t go off looking for adventure again.”

“You’d have to find her first. Do you want me to call the others? I’m sure Max is bored out of his mind. He’d love to join. Same for Lace.”

“Yeah, give everyone a call. Let’s see who shows up. Impromptu reunion. Just like old times.” Bull laughs, a deep sound that fills the van’s interior. “Let’s see how this turns out. Got to get the blood moving somehow, yeah?”

“Careful. We’re all very old. Let’s not get too excited, here. Kaaras can’t risk another heart attack.”

“I always knew he’d get heart problems. If not because of his size then because of that hypertension. Is he still not listening to his cardiologist?”

“It’s Kaaras, Bull. He’s listening very attentively to the point where it’s probably increasing his tension. You can tell him not to worry but then he’ll worry about being worried. It’s a vicious cycle.” Trevelyan coughs lightly. “Do you need someone to stay with you while this is being sorted out?”

“Malika’s sent me some babysitters. One of them is driving me around right now. Just going to pick up a few things since my house got fucking raided.”

Caleb would, normally, be very offended as being referred to as such. But frankly it’s true because this is the Iron Bull and Caleb is just here to drive him places and listen to whatever he says. It’s not the hardest job in the world. It isn’t even the most stressful. It is, however, one of the most important ones he might ever get in his entire life.

“Delightful. Don’t be mean to them. They’re young.”

“Ha. When have I ever been mean to a kid? They’re just so wide eyed and bushy tailed. It’s like bullying a mouse. No fun in that at all. Malika knows where Ellana is, it’s just a matter of getting Ellana out without making a scene. We’ll see how that goes.”

“It’s Ellana. There’s going to be a scene if there isn’t one already.”

“Exactly. Meet you all at the usual place?”

“Right. I’ll get started on those phone calls. Talk to you soon. And Bull?”

“Yes, boss?”

“Take care of yourself, alright?”

“Pot meet kettle. Easy on that hip, yeah?”

[sir-bertrandbell]

I lost ten years off my life tbh but we all know the mighty nein are chaotic dumbass at heart and a lot of their high stakes fights have been similar to this

and combat aside, this episode had some amazing moments. everyone coming together for jester, they’ve got her back, they’re absolutely down to kill the traveler if he hurts her, and most important to me: they acknowledge, through caleb, that breaking away from someone who shaped much of your formative years is really fucking hard

yasha’s wings!!! the symbolism!!!!! no one would have blamed her for trying to go to her wife, I don’t think. especially if she interpreted her vision like I had at first, that zuala was trapped in the shackles, not that she could become a shackle, a part of yasha’s past keeping her from healing. but she chose to move on, to take that step forward, face her fears and the unknown. I’m so glad Ashley is back with us and that we get to see yasha grow like this with the rest of the group.

there were funny little moments and jokes. I can’t list them all but like........this was a good ep, planning or no planning. stressful, and god only knows what they’d have done if caleb’s disintegrate was redirected, but it was a good ep. quality fight tho I’m biased I’ve wanted to see them fight this thing since they met it.

very excited to see what this dark city is and how it ties into tharizdun, if at all. it’s odd to me that they’ve all seemed to have dismissed that threat as being over—you think a group that managed to infiltrate the upper echelons of both empire and dynasty up to and including the chantry of the dawn, devoted to the very god who had sealed tharizdun away to begin with, is going to stop because tm9 defeated one faction of it?

maybe I’m misreading things, but the strange and shifting darkness, the familiarity Matt said they felt, the splintering of planes into one another....it sounds familiar in too many ways.

anyway. I think this is an episode I might even go back to rewatch from time to time, once my heart rate goes back to normal.

[hyunjinniebaby]

A little life is one of my all time favorite books, I’d love to know your thoughts of the book ! :-) ⭐️💙

hi!! omg yes i’d love to discuss this book. ive been trying to convince a few of my friends to read it as well so i have some people to talk about it with. but until then i have you!! yay!!

this response is gonna be very chaotic btw, but i will try to make sense.

fuckem list: brother luke, dr. traylor, caleb, JB, some counselors at the home, JUDES MOM, the truckers, the clients, THE LEARY’S 😡, caleb’s parents for creating him lol, everyone at the monastery

words i’ve used to describe this book: heartbreaking, sad, devastating, gut-wrenching, horrible (as in how it made me feel), beautifully written!!!, incredible

like i think we can agree that the writing is just impeccable... absolutely impeccable. i’ve never read anything with such beautiful writing in my god damn life.

for example, this quote: “He has the sense that if he says Willem’s name, then the face in the painting will turn toward him and answer...”

and this quote: “It was a preposterous notion, of course, and it was proven wrong in the most horrible way. But I couldn’t stop thinking this: that life tethered life.”

like??? it is just incredible how Yanagihara can make you feel such dread and longing and sadness. i’ve heard that this book is described as “torture/tragedy porn” and honestly that was one of the things that i was drawn to.

i just find it amazing that this book can make the reader feel such deep sorrow for Jude. and i think that one of the reasons that this book is so sad and makes us, as readers, feel so terrible is because the things that happen to Jude happen to people in the world today. everything that happened to him is absolutely likely to happen to the people around us.

the realness, the rawness of this book is what makes it so good and profound. it’s like a breath of fresh air but it hurts you to your core. i appreciate that so much.

ok yeah i’m done, pls feel free to message me/reblog this with your thoughts or send another ask!! i’d love to hear your thoughts and opinions. and if you disagree with me then i want to hear your opposing opinions!! ❤️❤️

[princessamericachavez]

Fjorester moments episodes 70 and 71

HEY I’M NOT DEAD

I was just enjoying a few days offline on the beach, but I’m back and all caught up. So, who’s ready to review some Fjorester moments??

Episode 70

Jester: *trying to understand why the mountain doesn’t have snow*

Fjord: *softest heart eyes*

Jester: Well, I could send like four times but...

Fjord: That’s kind of a waste of your gifts, right?

Jester: Not necessarily, if it’s important.

I JUST REALLY LIKE HOW THE PAST FEW MISSIONS/DAYS FJORD HAS BEEN EXTRA THOUGHTFUL ABOUT HER SPELLS EVER SINCE SHE VOICED HER ANNOYANCE ABOUT IT THAT ONE TIME OKAY? HE PAYS ATTENTION

When Caleb says he can take Jester home to her mother and she just says that very soft “oh” and kinda spaces out and Fjord immediately notices something’s wrong

Fjord: You okay, Jester?

Jester: Mhm

Fjord: JUST KEEP WORRIEDLY STARING AT HER

WHAT KIND OF DISNEY FANFIC SHIT

Fjord *before he literally just steps outside the room to keep a lookout while staring directly at Jester*: I’m gonna- you’ll be okay in here?

Jester: *nods*

REMEMBER THAT ONE AWKWARD AF EXCHANGE IN ASSARIOUS WHERE FJORD ASKED IF SHE’D BE SAFE IN THE ROOMS THEY WERE STAYING AT?? THIS WAS JUST LIKE A CALL BACK TO THAT IMO

LIKE

SAME FEELING, SAME WORRY, SAME SOFTNESS

IM FINE

Okay, so here might be my favorite one of this episode

when they are arguing about how to proceed

and Jester is getting all worked up and she’s angry and sad and still emotional about Yasha

Jester: I mean, honestly, I don’t give a fuck who we are with. I don’t care if it’s the Empire. I don’t care if it’s Xhorhas. I don’t care!

Fjord:

Fjord: What does matter? What if these men have families? What if they are in danger? What if what we can say can help?

Jester:

I think disagreements are, obviously, super important when you build a relationship with someone. A serious not crush-based relationship. And this point feels incredibly intense between them. The way he gets serious, and she can’t meet his eye, and how he keeps looking at her.

I don’t feel like Fjord is berating her, at all, either. It sounds, to me, like he is truly trying to understand where Jester stands and to make her see the moral conflict from his point of view.

What does matter? Is such a big and important question that they need to ask themselves, but I particularly like that Fjord seems inclined to figure it out with Jester, instead of just saying “this is what I think matters”.

And —this is the good part— Jester does listen to him! As she shows later on.

Fjord goes into a lengthier explanation about why he thinks they should stay, warn people, at the very least hope to help in the 24 hours they have left before returning to the capital. And he ends his speech clearly looking at her and with a plead:

Fjord: We could save lives.

And Jester nods.

Because she understands. Because they are again on the same page.

Jester: *wants to scry on Yasha*

Fjord: Do it, Jester.

I think they both want to know. They need to know.

Absolutely do not think about how this betrayal clearly hit them both the hardest (maybe second only to Beau) given everything they went through with Yasha back when the Shepherds took them.

Everyone: *talking about how Fjord should disguise himself to start a whisper campaign*

Jester: You want to do it, Fjord?

Fjord: Yeah, I’d be okay with that.

IT’S SO IMPORTANT TO ME THAT SHE CHECKS IN WITH HIM AND MAKES SURE THEY AREN’T SENDING HIM TO SOMETHING HE DOESN’T WANNA GO

Jester after her chaotic mission: I was all over the place with my accent, Fjord would’ve been so disappointed of me!

SHE’S SO SAD BECAUSE SHE CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HIS OPINION OF HER AND SHE WANTS HIM TO LIKE HER AND BE PROUD OF HER AND listen Beau is right and it might not be the healthiest but THERE’S A REASON HIS OPINION IS SO IMPORTANT TO HER

Beau: You know, you don’t need Fjord’s approval to be amazing, you know? You’re pretty cool. Do you need his validation?

I love Beauregard so much, she’s such a wonderful friend and honestly, this is the same advice I’d give a friend regarding her crush. Just because you like someone or you highly value their opinion of you, it shouldn’t mean you need their validation.

I think, in the long term, Beau will help Jester archive the healthy place she needs to make a relationship work.

Jester: *realize they left the moorbounders behind*

Fjord: *again, is the first one to notice she’s sad/shocked*

Fjord: C’mon, let’s stay on task.

He says it softly and, though this isn’t the shippiest thing, I really like that he makes sure to recenter her and keep moving.

It’s also funny and a lot more banter-y when she brings it up again and he just goes:

Fjord: The little death panthers will be fine by themselves, it’s fine

Also Jester both encourages Fjord to speak to the Bright Queen and to go peek into the cell, and I love both instances because they reinforce just how much Jester trusts Fjord and looks up to him when it comes to critical moments. Nice nice nice.

EPISODE 71

Admittedly, we didn’t get that much stuff this episode. One, because Skype makes things more complicated for everyone and Two because there was a lot going on.

I have this theory about most ships happening on face-to-face tables and brotps on side to side, and I feel like this placement kinda reinforced that a little... even if we did get a cute little gems.

Jester: Have you lived a really long time?

Fjord: !!!!!!

Darion: *reveals she’s nearly 200 years old*

Fjord: Fuck

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY TO ME OMG

I love that he turns to look at her like DID YOU JUST HEAR THAT?? but she isn’t looking which is what i’m talking about with side-to-side limitations

Fjord: *asks Darion to investigate about Uk’otoa*

Jester:

SHE’S SO WORRIED

Also, though I’m frustrated by the placing, one thing i love about this is that, in my head —and most fanart, and the intro, and most official art—Fjord and Jester are always standing or sitting next to each other, so this kinda illustrates how they probably behave all the time.

Sharing looks, turning to the other, probably most of their talks are quiet exchanges like this, private little moments.

Beau: *mentions splitting the party*

Fjord and Jester: in sync

LOOK AT THEM

LOOK IT

SPLITTING UP HAS NEVER BEEN AN OPTION

Nott: So, me and Jester and Caleb can go to Nicodranas and meet you here tomorrow

Fjord:

Beau: Fjord?

Fjord: Yes?

Beau: Do you wanna go to Nicodranas or do you wanna stay?

Jester *puppy eyes*: Nicodranas?

LOOK AT THOSE PUPPY EYES

SHE WANTS HIM TO COME WITH HER

SO BADLY 

Fjord: Do I want to?

Jester: *mouths something that for the life of me I can’t decipher*

Nott: It’s near the water.

Jester: I mean, only if you want to.

Fjord: What’s everybody doing here while we’re gone... if I go.

Even though he corrects himself in the end there, I love how he’s already made up his mind. Deep down, he knows he’s going.

Jester: [Essek] is pretty hot, so...

Fjord:

Their very married banter about bringing Sprinkle along for their adventure was so cute too. 

Jester: *lies about still having the dodecahedron*

Fjord: 

DLÑFKJADÑLFJA

Marion: Has [Fjord] been taking care of you?

Fjord: *nervously looks at her*

Jester: Yeah! I almost fell to my death, he made sure that didn’t happen!

Fjord: Yeah, caught her on the quick. 

Jester: Yes.

Marion: Very good, keep doing that. 

Fjord: *nods solemnly*

MAMA LAVORRE APPROVES AND SHIPS IT

MAMA LAVORRE KNOWS

IT’S SO CUTE AND AWKWARD 

BOTH OF THEM ARE SO SHY ABOUT IT

ALSO ‘HAS HE BEEN TAKING CARE OF YOU’ CAN BE READ IN SO MANY WAYS

ANY WAYYY

YESSSSSSS

okay okay okay that’s all

they are cute

i can’t wait for tomorrow’s episode!!

this was a lot to put together in a single post lmfao 

I love you all so much. 

[night-filled-mountain]

So, uh. I wrote a post. About Fjord and Caleb. It is over 3000 words long. I’m not going to make any attempt to justify this as a life decision. All I’ll say is that I am sure as hell putting this under a cut, and I would only venture beneath that cut if you really, really want to read an obsessive analysis of practically every significant interaction Fjord and Caleb have ever had (complete with direct quotes thanks to the light of my life, @crtranscript) that is longer than a goddamn term paper.

So the thing that keeps getting to me is that when Caleb agreed to bleed all over a dark altar to satisfy Fjord’s (and his own) curiosity, and he asked if Fjord would help him with his own goals when the time comes, Fjord didn’t say “Yes�� or “It’s a deal” or anything along those lines. He said, “Always.” (This was in episode 44, which we all know, but I’m noting it because I’m going to be talking about a lot of different episodes in this post.)

We all know that Caleb tends to view almost all social interactions as transactional. (I’ve seen people claiming that Nott is the one exception to this rule, and I’d actually argue that Jester is the one exception, but that’s a whole other post.) Fjord, on the other hand, does not view his relationships with the Mighty Nein that way. He never has. In fact, I feel like he, more than any other member, has seen them as a family from the start. Furthermore, I think that this fundamental misunderstanding between Fjord and Caleb goes back almost as far as the campaign itself.

Courtesy of the amazing folks @crtranscript, here’s their famous conversation from episode 4 of this campaign, “Disparate Pieces”:

Caleb: This group seems rough around the edges, but you seem clever. Hopefully we can make this work.

Fjord: I think we should be able to, yeah. I mean, a little guidance goes a long way. You seem to be good at looking out for Nott.

Caleb: I mean, full disclosure, I’m a little rough around the edges, but you catch my drift.

Fjord: I do. You can trust us. You’re safe here. I’m concerned with what happens with Jester and Beau. I think, amongst all of us, we should be fine.

Caleb: Let’s make it work.

Fjord: We’ll make it work.

The thing is, I don’t think Fjord does catch Caleb’s drift, or vice versa. Caleb is talking about practicalities--about his hope for a group that can remain cohesive for a while, protect him from danger, and help him achieve his goals, assuming he does the same for them. His comment that they are “rough around the edges” is an expression of his anxiety that they will not fulfill those criteria, which is why he comes to Fjord, who he sees as the most levelheaded and friendly of the bunch, to try and assuage his fears.

And then there’s his “Full disclosure, I’m a little rough around the edges,” which reveals an alternate anxiety that he struggles with enormously to this day: that he might not be useful to them--or at least, not useful enough to off-set all his baggage. Caleb sees other people as commodities, but he also sees himself that way. Yes, he has considered leaving the Mighty Nein with Nott (or even taking off on his own) when he starts to feel they might endanger his life or hinder his goals...but he is also afraid of being forced out. Of being abandoned by the group if they learn what he’s done, or the fragile state of his sanity, or how much danger hangs over him. From his perspective, his entire relationship with Beau hinges on this fear, and it (along with Beau being...Beau) periodically gets in the way of the genuine friendship they might otherwise develop.

In short, Caleb went to Fjord in “Disparate Pieces” to find out whether he thought that the future Mighty Nein would make a good toolbox, and to pitch himself as a useful tool in that box, despite his shortcomings. Fjord, though, takes things much deeper than that:

He acknowledges friendships and protective urges within the group (“You seem to be good at looking out for Nott” and “I’m concerned with what happens with Jester and Beau”). He’s positioning himself and Caleb as protectors within the group, watching over its younger or more chaotic members, without even considering why they would want to/what they will get in exchange. (Note that at some point in those early episodes, he even offered to protect Frumpkin if that mattered to Caleb.)

He doesn’t offer Caleb any specific skills or services, nor ask what he can give in return. Instead, he makes an unconditional blanket statement: “You can trust us. You’re safe here.” Considering the sum total of Caleb’s life experiences, it seems highly doubtful that Caleb actually believed him. Yet I’m pretty sure Fjord meant every word.

He doesn’t think (like Caleb will in episode 26, “Found and Lost,” after the Iron Shepherds abduction) about what each member of the group might contribute to his goals. He just makes another blanket statement: “Amongst all of us, we should be fine.” In his mind, they’re already a unit. And not just a functional unit like a toolbox, or even a ship’s crew. They’re a family. They’re like two misfit dads with a pack of adopted misfit children. (This also goes a long way to explaining the perpetual tension between Fjord and Nott, but again, that’s a whole other post.)

And to me, that’s it right there, the fundamental divide. Mighty Nein as toolbox vs. Mighty Nein as family. It explains Caleb and Fjord’s one big schism: Scrollgate (episode 12, “Midnight Espionage”). To Caleb, you always use the handiest tools in your arsenal, whether they happen to be your teammates or a magical scroll in a drawer. To Fjord, the safety of the family comes before personal goals, always: “We’re either a team, or you’re working for yourselves. Decide.” And note that a few seconds after Caleb “decided” (by dropping the scroll and walking out of the room), Fjord was hauling an unconscious Caleb out of a burning house and pouring a healing potion down his throat. Their confrontation was irrelevant the moment Caleb confirmed himself as part of the family.

This division doesn’t just explain why they’ve clashed in the past, though, but also why their relationship has improved. When did Fjord’s opinion of Caleb take a turn for the better? When Caleb showed up at the Sour Nest, played a central role in defeating the Iron Shepherds and freeing his kidnapped teammates, and then comforted them and expressed affection for them (episode 30, “The Journey Home”). Travis said on Talks Machina that both he and Fjord were surprised by Caleb’s behavior--he’d expected Caleb to “throw it in their faces” or talk about how they owed him for the rescue. And honestly, is it any surprise he expected this? It would have fit Caleb’s m.o. perfectly. Both the rescue itself and Caleb’s selfless behavior afterward were a major turning point for Caleb, a non-transactional approach to his relationship with the gang. And Fjord fully recognized how huge that was, and took care to thank Caleb specifically for it.

But that brings me to the current Avantika/Uk’otoa arc, and all the fascinating Caleb/Fjord interactions it’s brought us, culminating in the madness that was Thursday night’s “blood pact.” I think that, during this arc, the tables have turned. If the Iron Shepherds arc helped repair their relationship because Caleb began to act more like Fjord, then this arc has complicated their relationship because Fjord (as Caleb sees it) has begun to act more like Caleb.

This, I think, has been the subtext lurking beneath Caleb’s repeated, insistent questioning of Fjord about what he wants, what his specific goals are during this quest, and how he wants the Mighty Nein to help achieve them. It makes perfect sense that Caleb has been so frantic to get to the bottom of that question, and that Fjord’s genuinely confused and non-committal answers have been driving him nuts. Because, from Caleb’s perspective, Fjord is finally utilizing the Mighty Nein for their proper purpose: to achieve personal goals.

Fjord must have goals. He must have a specific design for the thing he wants to build with his toolbox (because Caleb does, and Nott does, and Trent Ikithon did, and that’s pretty much the full range of Caleb’s experience). If he would just say what they are, Caleb could get back on familiar ground and frame the whole quest as transactional, offering to help achieve Fjord’s goals in exchange for the same privilege down the line, or refusing and cutting his losses if the risk is too high (which he threatened to do if Fjord tried to awaken Uk’otoa). If, however, Fjord won’t state his goals clearly, he must be shady, untrustworthy, deliberately hiding something, trying to manipulate his “toolbox” to achieve the desired result. It couldn’t possibly be because he never had a plan beyond “Find some answers and assume my family has my back.” It couldn’t possibly be that he wants the decision process to be collaborative, even during his own personal quest, because that’s how a family gets things done...could it?

So we have the two of them constantly, subtly working at cross-purposes. In episode 40, “Dubious Pursuits,” Caleb tells Fjord, “You do what you have to” with regard to the Avantika situation, assuming that Fjord will do the practical, goal-oriented thing: sleep with her to protect himself and the group.

But I suspect what Fjord really wanted in that moment was for someone (or everyone) to offer him help or reassurance, to serve as a buffer between him and this woman he was openly baffled by and terrified of. While Caleb’s go-to strategy when things get tough is to make a plan (often involving “calculated risk”) and implement it without consulting anyone, Fjord’s is to assemble the entire group and solicit their opinions, listening to and weighing every single voice before coming to a consensus. He actually tries to make this very clear to Caleb earlier in the aforementioned conversation: “I need more info, Caleb. I need more data, more knowledge. You read books on this stuff. There has to be someone out there that knows more about this before we just charge in.” When Caleb expresses serious concerns about Fjord’s intentions, Fjord answers, “I have no interest in dealing with matters that predate time as we know it. I’m pretty simple. These days I’ve spent with you are the most exciting of my entire life. I’m not looking to end them, or the world, by frivolously giving up something that I barely understand.” 

This is an answer that Caleb absolutely cannot believe as long as he keeps projecting his own goals and values onto Fjord. Because Fjord is prioritizing his found family over power, over ancient arcane knowledge. Nothing sounds faker to Caleb than the two sentences that might be the most succinct summary of Fjord’s motivations we’ve ever heard: “I’m pretty simple. These days I’ve spent with you are the most exciting of my life.”

What Fjord wanted in that moment was for the M9 to tell him, “We have ideas, we’ve got your back, we’ll stand with you (and against HER) like family should, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” But Caleb couldn’t imagine saying (or hearing) those words. Just imagine for a second if those words had occurred to him or Astrid or Eodwulf sixteen years before our story began.

Instead, Caleb gives Fjord the bleak truth about Avantika: “She’s not going to let go of you. You are a key that she needs.” Sound familiar? Stir up any memories of Caleb’s backstory? Or (even more chillingly) of the way Caleb himself usually views (or at least tries to view) the people he works with?

So Fjord slept with Avantika. Not, as Caleb assumed, because it was “no big deal” in the service of his master plan, but because Caleb implied that he had a responsibility to do so, and Fjord takes his family’s opinions and his responsibilities to them more seriously than anything else. And in episode 43, “In Hot Water,” even Caleb himself figures that out (“He has compromised himself with this woman, for us, for himself, for all of our safety. It is going to be difficult for him”). What made him realize his mistake? Probably the one-on-one conversation he had with Fjord in episode 41, “A Pirate’s Life for Me.” 

I think this conversation is crucial to their relationship. I might go so far as to say that it changes Caleb’s view of Fjord almost as radically as the Iron Shepherds arc changed Fjord’s view of Caleb. Here Caleb is, thinking of Fjord as a levelheaded, competent leader, a friendly guy...but cagey and secretive, potentially dangerous, possibly manipulating them all in the name of his mysterious master plan. And then Fjord pulls Caleb aside and just lays it all out.

“I had to admit I found myself a bit surprised. My initial impression of you was someone a bit timid and maybe reserved; meek even. Your tone, your opinion of what to do with Avantika in order to make sure that we’re okay, it seemed very…calculated. Very…risky. Do you mind me asking if you’ve...have you ever sacrificed anything in order to achieve a greater goal? Because I feel like I am swimming in the deep end and I don’t quite know what I’m doing.”

This little monologue turned Caleb’s entire impression of Fjord and his arc on its head. I think this is when he realized that Fjord isn’t ruthlessly pursuing some deep, dark, secret goal like Caleb himself. Instead, he’s been thrust unwillingly into a situation where he’s suddenly being forced to make the kinds of harrowing decisions that Caleb’s long since conditioned himself to make.

In stark contrast to his confident ultimatums in their previous conversation, Caleb is awkward and skittish, caught off-guard. He dodges Fjord’s question with irrelevant half-truths, but he knows perfectly well how astute it was. And suddenly, he’s not seeing Fjord as a current mirror image of himself, ruthless and calculating; he’s seeing Fjord as a mirror of himself as a child, innocent and uncertain, finding himself in a situation with no right or safe choices, where power and knowledge come with a heavy dose of manipulation and violence.

And who does Fjord come to, with praise for his strategic intellect and keen perception? Who does he trust to fix this fucked-up situation if necessary? Caleb. Because he senses, despite Caleb’s evasions, that he has been in this kind of situation before...and he assumes, in a moment of incredible irony, that this means Caleb is equipped to make the right choice:

Fjord: I think you know what I mean, but in case this thing gets out of hand, can I count on you to right the ship if need be?

Caleb: Keep the group safe?

Fjord: Of course.

Keep the group safe. That’s what Fjord has tasked both himself and Caleb with through the whole damn campaign, and Caleb finally gets it. That Fjord doesn’t want a powerful tool in his arsenal to achieve his own goals; he wants a back-up guardian for the flock of wayward children he’s taken under his wing. This is one of those rare moments (like “The Journey Home”) when Caleb’s brain fully switches from toolbox to family, and the proof is in the way the conversation ends: “I think that woman is going to try to kill you, I really do.”

Why does Caleb hesitate so long and “nervously twiddle” his bit of wire before conveying that message? Because it’s so out of character. Because his own agenda is to use Fjord as a buffer between Avantika and the rest of the group, and this warning directly contradicts that agenda. Because this isn’t an expression of concern about group cohesion or success.

It’s an expression of concern for Fjord.

And at the end of the following episode (episode 42, “A Hole in the Plan,” if we’re still keeping track), Caleb finally does what Fjord wanted all along. He produces a literal manifestation of the thing that Fjord has wanted the M9 to do metaphorically ever since they first encountered Avantika: “I cast Wall of Fire between her and us.” He sends the message, loud and clear, that Fjord will no longer be used as a tool for the protection of the group, because the entire family is worthy of protection. Family, not toolbox.

And Fjord reacts immediately. In episode 43, “In Hot Water,” his focus is on Caleb throughout the fight with Avantika’s crew: moving Caleb out of danger, reviving Caleb when he’s down, and panicking so much that he lets his accent slip because Caleb has done just what Fjord asked, he has kept the group safe, and Fjord, in turn, feels responsible for Caleb, who is part of the family as well.

...And all of this brings me to the most recent episode. To episode 44, which...doesn’t have a title yet. 😛 And to the infamous blood ritual.

Now, there were a million things going on with that ritual (and the spontaneous “pact” that followed). Plenty of people have already written about them more eloquently than I ever could. We had both Fjord and Caleb poking at and manipulating each other, testing each other’s boundaries, each trying to see how far the other would go. We had them acknowledging their shared fascination with power (in a darker echo of Fjord’s constant compliments for Caleb’s magic at the beginning of the campaign), and we had Fjord “7 wisdom” Tusktooth and Caleb “calculated risk” Widogast go into an ill-considered, self-destructive frenzy before Jester’s (and our) horrified eyes.

But to me, for all the common ground they discovered in that scene, for all the “blood brothers” hype of their gory handshake, the fundamental misunderstanding still remains. Caleb, despite all the recent progress he’s made toward understanding and even adopting Fjord’s “Mighty Nein=family” perspective, thinks that he’s finally discovered the real Fjord: reckless, ambitious, willing to trade favors with Caleb in order to pursue knowledge and power, placing the two of them on exactly the same page. He tries to lay this out for Fjord right before the bloodbath, admitting that he has goals of his own and asking if Fjord will be there to help him accomplish them.

And Fjord’s response? “Always.”

It’s a subtle moment. I’m pretty sure Caleb didn’t pick up on it. He still viewed the situation as a trade, and when Fjord ended the ritual prematurely, when he took Caleb’s hand and said, “We understand each other,” Caleb thought they were sealing a pact that was contingent on his willingness to bleed.

In Fjord’s mind? It was the opposite.

This was never about demanding a trade from Caleb (or vice versa). They were both bleeding on that altar. The question they both kept asking each other (“Aren’t you curious?”) wasn’t about pressuring each other into an unwanted situation; it was about acknowledging their shared curiosity and acting on it. It wasn’t Caleb working toward Fjord’s goals so that Fjord will eventually work toward Caleb’s; it was about the two of them working together, in every situation, to accomplish the goals of the group (even when that means backing off from their own ambitions when the risk becomes too great, as demonstrated by the fact that he ended that ritual when the cost became too high).

Fjord didn’t promise to work toward Caleb’s goals if Caleb worked toward his. He promised to work toward Caleb’s goals, full-stop. Always. Always. He’s been working for Caleb--and the rest of the Mighty Nein--since they first became a unit. Barring a blatant betrayal of the group (like he feared during Scrollgate), he’s never had any intention of doing anything else, or any conditions that apply to that assistance. Family, not toolbox.

Caleb has spent the entire campaign trying to bargain for something that has always been offered to him freely. Fjord told him “You’re safe here” before the M9 even hit the road together, and he told him “Always” before a single drop of blood was spilled.

[crittergallery]

Two things. 1) I have to be up at 5 for work tomorrow but I’m writing this instead like an idiot, and 2) I’m a little nervous about posting this because I feel like this is poking at a hornets’ nest of drama I’d rather not deal with, but I do have some thoughts that I hope can be... encouraging, I guess.

Ever since this Adventures in Pirateland arc began, almost every episode that’s aired has come with a bevy of comments about the inadequacy of the Mighty Nein’s moral compass, how this looks to be turning into an evil campaign, how they’re failing to live up to Molly’s inspiration, etc. And to be honest I don’t really understand this outlook. Don’t get me wrong, I’m excited and hoping to watch the M9 evolve into heroes as much as the next person, and I’m certain it will happen eventually. But expecting it so soon just seems like an unrealistic expectation, for a number of reasons.

For one, the Mighty Nein have got a long way to go before they reach that point. I see them compared to Vox Machina on occasion, which I don’t think is really fair. As a collective whole, Vox Machina were already chaotic good from the start. From what we know of their backstories and what we’ve been told of their pre-stream adventures, only really Grog came from a hostile, aggressive background and was raised to reflect it, and with the rest of the group surrounding him, his more chaotic neutral temperament could be wrangled. With the Mighty Nein, the majority have grown up in hostile or damaging circumstances and have developed survival techniques to deal with it. Fjord was an orphan that went to extremes for his own survival. Beau was an ACTUAL criminal; it’s literally her character background. Caleb was ACTUALLY lawful evil for some years of his life. Nott grew up in goblin society, Jester was isolated and worships a trickster god, and even Caduceus operates on a “law of nature” morality system. They’re chaotic neutral to the max. Their makeup is not naturally tuned to goodness; that’s something they’re going to have to really work at. Expecting them to switch on a dime is a lot to expect.

Second, a lot of people seem unhappy with how they’re not following Molly’s “leave places better” policy, like Molly’s scolding them from the afterlife or something. Again, I think that’s an incomplete version of Molly that people are looking to. Once a character dies, especially a fan favorite, people tend to put them on pedestals. Molly had some good ideals and I believe he was a good person, but he was far from a moral paragon. He did shitty things too, guys. He made Caleb uncomfortable on purpose to teach him a lesson. He used Charm spells on the others against their wills. He signed up with the Gentleman just as readily as the others, and I don’t think the Gentleman makes it his business to leave places better than he found them. Molly didn’t have his life all together. A lot of people seem to like his “that person is not me” perspective, and I think it’s a great character trait, but it wasn’t necessarily a healthy or responsible one. So, by struggling to get their feet under them in terms of what their morality is, I don’t think the Mighty Nein are tarnishing the memory of their friend who was probably just as clueless as they were, he was just better at hiding it. 

Third, a lot of people seem to forget that not all of the Mighty Nein were on board with following Molly’s lead. That was mostly just Beau. The big takeaway that Nott got from the experience was that she cared about their weird little family and would do anything to save them, the others weren’t even there, and Caleb is a moral mess that probably needs to address his own issues first before digging into the greater good of things. The big turn around from Molly’s death when it came to the group was more about them learning to accept how much they cared about each other and placing their trust in one another, not about becoming more altruistic. That’s progression that we are seeing this arc: Fjord’s being more open and honest, Beau is confessing how some of the stuff they do doesn’t sit right with her, Caleb is growing into more of a team player, etc. 

And fourth, they ARE in a precarious position right now. Avantika might seem easygoing with them right now, but there’s no telling how quickly she’ll turn on them if they don’t dance to her tune. Even the Plank King himself is telling them to watch their backs while they’re working with her. In this tricky spot (trying to stay alive, trying to help Fjord figure out his situation, as well as trying to establish their morality), things are going to be shaky.

To sum up my thesis on the matter: I believe the M9 will become heroes in their own rights, I just think it’s unreasonable to expect it now. Most of them have been raised in situations that don’t automatically incline them toward altruism, they’re in a tricky spot right now, and while I believe Molly’s influence will play a part in making them more selfless and heroic, it’s not as much of a priority for them right now as supporting and learning to trust each other is. They’ll get there, don’t worry, I believe it wholeheartedly. But we’re not even at the level where we met Vox Machina, and most of their stories haven’t even been touched on yet. There’s still plenty of time for growth and change. Just relax, take a deep breath, and try to enjoy the chaotic neutral shenanigans. Once they come into their own, it’ll be even more amazing to look back and see how far they’ve gone. 

[bthenoise]

Yes, Another Decade Recap List: These Are The 16 Most Impactful Records of the 2010′s

Look, to be honest, when it came to constructing some sort of “end of decade” list looking back on the 2010′s, we here at The Noise really had no idea what we wanted to do. 

With literally hundreds and hundreds of amazing releases over the last 10 years, how in the world are we supposed to pick “the best” of the decade? 

The answer: We aren’t.

See, the idea of something being labeled “the best” is subjective. It’s simply one person’s opinion vs the other. And truthfully, the idea of us thinking our opinion on something is any better or more important than yours makes us look like a bunch of assholes. 

Really, who cares what we think is the best? 

So, after constructing a colossal playlist featuring 1000 of our favorite songs from the 2010′s, something became very clear to us. Of all the songs we picked, there were a handful of records that contributed way more songs than the others. 

Simply put, these albums made a lasting mark on this decade that go way deeper than them being any good or not. These particular albums helped influence a generation, jumpstart artists’ careers and ultimately solidify themselves as the most impactful releases of the 2010′s. 

The albums we decided to shine a light on from the last ten years are records that carry more weight than just being a fan-favorite. We’re talking about releases we’ll look back on as a moment where everything changed for that artist.       

To check out the 16 albums we think are the biggest movers and shakers from our scene over the last ten years, be sure to look below. Afterward, if you hate our list and really want to tell us your opinion, you can file a complaint at: YouReallyThinkWeWillReadThis@BringTheNoise.com.  

16) Movements - Feel Something

Starting our list off is a debut record from 2017 that helped propel a band from opening act to headliner in no time. With an impressive six-track EP released the year prior, SoCal act Movements quickly solidified their emerging star status with their flawless LP Feel Something. Following their first-ever full-length, Movements went on to sell out 27 dates of their first headlining tour and perform on the main stage of the final cross country Warped Tour. With a new album on the horizon, we’ll see just how far Movements and their unique brand of alternative pop-punk are able to take things leading into a new decade.  

15) Dance Gavin Dance - Acceptance Speech

How does a band with two former frontmen and four fantastic LPs continue to thrive eight years into their career? Enter, Tilian Pearson. Following another departure of original vocalist Jonny Craig, post-hardcore experimentalists Dance Gavin Dance turned to the former Tides Of Man singer to handle the vacant role of clean vocals. The result? The game-changing release of Acceptance Speech which helped spring-board the band to another level of musical perfection. Six years and three more genre-defining albums later, DGD and Pearson are still going strong gearing up to headline their own hometown festival and release their ninth full-length album all thanks in part to their 2013 LP.      

14) Ice Nine Kills - The Silver Scream

Coming in as the most recent record on our list, this horror-based release will be seen as the turning point in a band’s seasoned tenure. After 10-plus years of honing their craft, Boston’s Ice Nine Kills finally saw the fruits of their labor with the groundbreaking, career-defining album The Silver Scream. Taking the passion of metalheads and scary movie fanatics and combining them into a blood-soaked, breakdown-heavy package, Ice Nine Kills constructed a record that will easily withstand the test of time and help them extend their careers well into the 2020′s.   

13) Code Orange - I Am King

Dropping the “Kids” from their moniker and shifting gears into their first album as just Code Orange, the Pittsburgh bruisers constructed an unrelenting metal record that shook listeners to their core. With a punishing opening track that literally warns you about what you’re about to experience, it was pretty evident I Am King was unlike anything people have ever heard. Coupled with the mind-altering “Dreams In Inertia” and the utterly pulverizing “My World,” Code Orange quickly and deservingly so became the metal megastars they were destined to become.  

12) Ghost - Meliora

Speaking of metal megastars, after slowly creating word-of-mouth with their cult-like presence, throwback metal sounds and revolving door of Papa Emeritus frontmen, Sweedish act Ghost finally put it all together with their third studio album Meliora. Lead by the Grammy-winning single “Cirice,” Meliora fused haunting heavy metal imagery with roaring and anthemic songwriting creating the perfect package of evil-yet-accessible music. Debuting at number 8 on the Billboard 200 chart selling an estimated 29,000 copies in its first week, it was clear no matter which Papa was fronting the band, Ghost was ready to claim their spot atop the metal hierarchy.    

11) Issues - Issues

Not many bands can say that their first full-length album debuted inside the top ten of the Billboard 200. But then again, not many bands are Issues. Fusing djent, hip-hop, metal, pop-punk, R&B and more to create their sensational self-titled album, Issues proved they were more than just a band featuring former members of Woe, Is Me. Instead, Issues showcased a group of talented, trendsetting musicians destined to change the landscape of metalcore music for the better.     

10) I Prevail - Lifelines

After a famed cover of a well-known pop artist quickly put them on the map, Detroit’s I Prevail instantly had all the pressure in the world as they started to create what would be their debut album. Riding the success of their first EP Heart Vs Mind and tours with the likes of Hollywood Undead, Crown The Empire and Pop Evil, the Michigan act suddenly shot to the top of the metalcore ranks with the release of their remarkable, sonically-charged LP Lifelines. Charting at number 15 on the Billboard 200 selling over 19,000 copies in the first week, I Prevail went on to play Warped Tour for the first time -- finding a home on the main stage -- and later headlined the Rage On The Stage tour with scene veterans We Came As Romans, The Word Alive and Escape The Fate. Now Grammy-nominated and continuing to grow even larger, thanks in part to the accomplishments of Lifelines, I Prevail is without-a-doubt one of our scene’s biggest acts.

09) PVRIS - White Noise 

In the midst of metalcore’s supremacy in the Warped Tour scene -- thanks to the never-ending list of “Risecore” bands -- came an act no one saw coming. Featured on a roster with the likes of Memphis May Fire, Miss May I, Like Moths To Flames, Crown The Empire and more was a pop-savvy, synth-lead baby band mistakenly pronounced “p-ver-is.” With their infectious, critically acclaimed debut White Noise landing at number 88 on Billboard and totaling nearly 50 million YouTube views on its TEN music videos, PVRIS proved it was possible to make an impact in this community with sheer talent, hard work, and catchy-as-hell lyricism. After just one listen to the undeniably great lead single “St. Patrick,” you’ll know exactly what we’re talking about.    

08) Knocked Loose - Laugh Tracks 

15 years from now, if we haven’t burnt the earth to the ground yet, we’ll look back on the Laugh Tracks era of Knocked Loose and remember where we were -- you know, because by 2034 Knocked Loose will be one of the biggest bands on the planet. Anyway, for us, the most memorable moment was watching them play “Billy No Mates” on the 2017 Vans Warped Tour at the Full Sail Stage. It was easily the largest and most insane side stage set we had ever seen in our 10 years of attending Warped Tour. From that very moment, we knew Knocked Loose and Laugh Tracks were going to be a big deal. Fast forward to 2019 and the band is now selling out 2,000-capacity venues on a semi-nightly basis. 2034 here we come!  

07) Beartooth - Disgusting 

Very rarely does a member of a former band make it bigger with his second act. In those situations though, those people aren’t Caleb Shomo. Venturing out from his teenage band Attack Attack!, Shomo started Beartooth as a fun project with zero expectations of anything blowing up. Little did he know after building buzz with his chaotic 2013 EP Sick, Beartooth was about to take things to a whole nother level with the release of their massive breakout LP Disgusting. Fiery and fearsome from start to finish and full of nothing but hits like “In Between,” "The Lines” and “Beaten In Lips,” Disgusting is definitely the fuse that lit Beartooth’s outstanding career.

06) Every Time I Die - Low Teens

How does a hardcore band 18 years into a well-respected career keep things relevant and progressing to a point where they’re anointed into “cult” status? Well, how about releasing their darkest, most emotionally charged album of their discography. After a life-altering scare to frontman Keith Buckley and his family, the longtime vocalist constructed some of his deepest and most honest lyrics for Every Time I Die’s soul-crushing LP Low Teens. Featuring guest vocals from Deadguy’s Tim Singer and Panic! At The Disco’s Brendon Urie (plus their most moving song to date “Map Change”), ETID showed off their versatility with their eighth studio album and were treated to a successful two-year touring cycle with the likes of Taking Back Sunday, Fall Out Boy, Motionless In White and Turnstile as well as a memorable run on the last-ever Vans Warped Tour. Not to mention, following the success of Low Teens, the band’s hometown of Buffalo, NY officially proclaimed December 15th, 2018 as “Every Time I Die Day” and a year later inducted them into the Buffalo Music Hall of Fame.     

05) Of Mice & Men - Restoring Force 

While some may point to 2011′s The Flood as the record that “broke” scene-favorites Of Mice & Men and others might argue their debut self-titled release was what laid the foundation for one of this decade’s most successful acts, we’d like to focus on 2014. Continuing to climb the metalcore ranks following the release of two very well-received records, Austin Carlile and Co. put out their career-changing LP Restoring Force featuring new bassist and clean vocalist Aaron Pauley. Laying to rest any displeasure about their changes in sound or lineup, Of Mice & Men went on to sell over 51,000 copies in the first week peaking at number 4 on the Billboard 200. Riding the success of their third full-length album, OM&M later went on to support bands like Linkin Park and Rise Against out on tour thus solidifying their spot as one of the biggest metalcore acts of the 2010′s.       

04) A Day To Remember - Common Courtesy 

Some people remember A Day To Remember’s Common Courtesy for different reasons. Maybe it was the hilarious “reality series” made to promote the record -- the “Golden Eagle” episode was our favorite! Or maybe it was the seemingly never-ending lawsuit battle between the band and the notoriously greedy Victory Records -- we’ll never forget when ADTR broke the news on stage that the album was actually coming. For us, what we remember most was the first time we saw the music video for “Right Back At It Again.” We watched that goofy, cartoony music video 500 times trying to catch all the different things they put in the video -- like did you ever notice the surfing dog or aliens abducting cows? Well, whatever it was that got you to check out Common Courtesy, there’s no denying the impact it had on A Day To Remember’s career as the Ocala natives have only gotten even bigger since that 2013 release. With a new album on the way from the not-at-all-greedy Fueled By Ramen, it’ll be exciting to see where the 2020′s take ADTR next.        

03) Architects - Holy Hell

With all the biopics being made today, there is no doubt in our mind one will be made about Brighton’s finest, Architects. With an already established career under their belts dating back to 2006, the band was continuing to see growth following their signing to Epitaph Records and the release of breathtaking LPs Lost Forever // Lost Together and All Our Gods Have Abandoned Us. Then, just like that, on August 20th, 2016 founding guitarist and primary songwriter Tom Searle lost his fight with cancer. Leaving the band in an obvious state of disarray after losing their bandmate and brethren, Architects were left with the choice of giving up or continuing Tom’s legacy. As with most biopics, this story has a positive ending as Architects decided to fight through the pain and ultimately release not just one of the best records of their career but one of the best records in metalcore, period.       

02) Bring Me The Horizon - That’s The Spirit 

This can go one of two ways: You either accept That’s The Spirit is Bring Me The Horizon’s most impactful career-defining record to date or fight with us to the death that Sempiternal is deserving of this spot. Either way, there’s no denying Bring Me The Horizon’s influence on this decade. With their boundary-pushing LP That’s The Spirit, frontman Oli Sykes traded his growl for more of a pop-laced bite as BMTH ushered in their most successful era as a band seeing their fifth studio album land at number 2 on the Billboard 200. Still doubting That’s The Sprit’s impact on the scene? In 2018, only three years after its release, the gold-certified record amassed over one BILLION Spotify streams -- billion, with a B!  

01) Pierce The Veil - Collide With The Sky 

Want to talk about a life-changing album? For San Diego scenesters Pierce The Veil, the famed four-piece went from a successful slow-building career to becoming a full-blown force with their third full-length record. Building off two well-received albums in A Flair For The Dramatic and Selfish Machines, Vic Fuentes and Co. (with the help of a Kellin Quinn-featured song) absolutely exploded into another stratosphere -- no pun intended -- with their now-gold-certified album Collide With The Sky. Lead by their platinum-selling single “King For A Day” and their Spanish-styled song “Bulls In The Bronx,” Pierce The Veil took the scene by storm thanks to their angsty, heart-pounding Fearless Records debut.

Honorable Mentions:

Deafheaven - Sunbather  Falling In Reverse - The Drug In Me Is You  Neck Deep - Life’s Not Out To Get You Nothing More - The Stories We Tell Ourselves  PUP - PUP State Champs - Around The World And Back The Amity Affliction - Let The Ocean Take Me  The Story So Far - What You Don’t See The Wonder Years - The Greatest Generation Wage War - Blueprints

[wordweneversaid]

Things I’ll never say #165

It’s been a while. I don’t really owe an explanation, but here’s one anyways. Life has been chaotic, things have been bad and I haven’t had the time to focus on my love life or lack therof. Grant has a girlfriend, which is good and ok because as charming as he is, he wasn’t right for me and I wasn’t right for him. Morris and I haven’t talked in a long time, it’s been exactly a year since I fell for him (the first time) and I still care about him. He is charming and sweet and perfect. I wish our time would come, and I keep out hope that it will but I need to be able to be okay if it doesn’t. He’s amazing, as much as I don’t love him, I do. Sam has a girlfriend. This one killed me a little. It was a surprise and she’s cute and a million times more talented than I am. They make muffins and spend time together and I can’t help but wish that I had that. He holds a special place in my heart, but I’m happy that he’s happy. He’s doing good and I can’t let myself be sad about that. He’s an amazing person and he deserves the world. We will probably never be together and that’s okay, there will be others. I haven’t seen Caleb since my birthday in July, we haven’t talked either. I stopped dwelling on everyone for a while because of how much was going on in my life, and it was easy due to lack of seeing or talking to them. I know that as soon as I see Caleb again, or I hear his upcoming music, I will be down the rabbit hole again. It’s the time of year that kills me the most, especially because of last year. I’m being constantly reminded of Morris and that really hurts. I’m trying really hard to be happy and it’s not going great. In an ideal world, Morris and I would be together now and in the summer we would sit on the beach and watch the sunrise. We would go hiking and everything would be okay. But this isn’t that world. As much as it kills me, I know that we will probably never be together. I wish I could go back in time, I would redo last year. This year has been tough, I haven’t looked good and that’s been killing me. My friends have been really shitty too. I’m constantly ignored and not invited to things, I’m no ones first choice. All of my friends have multiple people who are a million times more important then me. So there’s an update that’s probably way too long. I don’t anticipate anything fun or exciting happening soon, so that’s about it.

- to CSM and no one in particular

[princessamericachavez]

Fjorester in Episode 43

I watched this ep live which means it was 4-7am to me and I might have missed stuff, but here’s what I remember

When Jester wants to start a bar fight and Fjord knows she’s going for it, so his first comment about it, before she even says she wants to fight is “No killing, Jester.”

And then the others keep trying to talk her out of it but the only opinion she asks is Fjord’s saying “Tusktooth?”

But, like, Fjord (as I’ve yelled about so many times before) enjoys Jester’s shenanigans even when he pretends to be frustrated by them, so instead of talking her out of it, he pretends to be chugging on his ale, which Jester correctly takes as a “go ahead”.

heart eyeeeees

“One gold on the blue one!” Awesome callback to their fight in the Gentleman’s speakeasy, further proof that Fjord is just a chaotic prankster at heart and a reminder that he’s constantly in awe by how badass Jester is.

Fjord’s soft-ass smile after the fight when Jester excitedly declares “Hey, I made a friend!” “Yeah, you kept all your teeth!”

When they are talking about the Divers Grave and they are discussing what kind of monster might be in there and then Jester says “It’s an underwater banshee, for sure.” 

“Is that a thing?” 

“Yeah.”

*knowing full well he’s being fucked with* “Hmmmm.”

I don’t know why that exchange feels so flirty to me, and like the fact that they keep zeroing in on each other during group conversations like they live in their own little bubble, kills me.

The Caleb and Jester talk!!!!!!!!

(I will make a whole separate post dissecting this conversation later)

“Really, none of us like it here but Fjord” “I don’t even know if he likes it a lot” 

Yes! Give me Jester picking up on Fjord’s general discomfort with the situation and how stressed and uneasy he is with how everything’s gone down!

For real though, if I have to see one more post talking about how Jester doesn’t actually care about the real Fjord or how he feels about this whole situation, this talk is one of the very many scenes imma shove on their faces passive-aggressively. 

“Well, there’s parts of it that he likes.” “Like Avantika” “I don’t know”

Rip my heart out, Laura Bailey, why don’t you!

“You’re sweet on him, ja?” “I don’t know...” “Yeah.” “It feels funny.” “How do you mean?”

THIS WHOLE THING WAS SUCH CALL BACK TO VEX AND VAX TALKING ABOUT PERCY THO

“Well, you know when you really like somebody but then you start to know them and you go ‘do I like them, or do I like what I thought they were’? And you don’t know.”

Mfking laura bailey giving us that character growth arc with sheltered naive Jester who believes in love at first sight and the romance all her books talked about and is now beginning to realize that real deep feelings are much stronger and complicated than all of that.

Like the way she says it “feels funny” really says so much.

And I know some people might take this as “oh so she never liked him for real” but I think that would mean taking this conversation entirely out of context. 

This whole arc, Fjord and Jester have had some very big moments together, and I think Jester’s confusion does not stem from being disillusioned with Fjord...

I think the fact is that she’s feeling more than she expected, she’s discovering she likes Fjord in a way she has no words for, in a way that makes her hurt when he talks to Avantika, that makes her confused about their interactions, second guessing his intentions and whether he’s fliriting back with her or not, overanalyzing what his gestures mean, like the kiss...

Jester is in Love with capital L and none of her mother’s teachings and experience have prepared her to handle it.

What I want to talk about here, though, is not about Jester’s confusion per se but how Travis and Matt react to this. Since if anyone is aware of what Fjord feels about this it would be the two of them.

“Do I like them or do I like what I thought they were?”

This is the face of a man who just realized his wife is taking her funny character’s crush and turning it into real feelings and he’s going to be fucked.

WHAT IS THAT LOOK YOU TWO. I CAN SEE YOU. WHAT DO YOU KNOW.

That is the face of a DM who is ready to take the most advantage of this situation in the future.

Bonus: Taliesin “I’ve been in the receiving end of this” Jaffe is enjoying this too much. He is just shaming Travis/Fjord for his bad choices.

“And then you think they are flirting with you but then you find out they probably weren’t, you know?”

Travis’s blush just tells me that there was flirting (which was pretty obvious, and Laura knows it)

“And you feel kinda sad about it and maybe a little stupid?”

LOOK AT THOSE FACES

Travis after that talk contemplating his life choices.

But for real, what kills me about that talk is how familiar it feels, and how confused Jester seems by Fjord’s hot and cold attitude, but she’s not ever blaming him for not liking her, or not living up to her fantasy standards, not even for leading her on,  instead, she’s blaming herself and feeling stupid for not comprehending right away all of these complicated emotions.

Caleb: “Tomorrow we get sorted out, we help Fjord figure out his shit.”

Jester: “Yeah, that’s important to him.”

TELL ME SHE DOESN’T CARE YOU DEMONS I’M WAITING

Also, thank god that Jester talked to Caleb about this because he’s the one person who gave her some sensible advice: let’s focus on surviving and once back on main land you can take your time to figure your feelings out.

He also brings up that this is important for Fjord, which she agrees on. So no matter what, feelings or not, they will support him through this as best as they can.

Which brings us to Caduceus’s an and Fjord’s talk.

I love this conversation in light of what Tal’s said about Caduceus’ point of view during last weeks Talks: he’s aware of how Fjord’s decision to sleep will Avantika will create friction within the group, especially with Jester.

C: “I think this place is dangerous. She is dangerous.” F: “That she is.” 

And Fjord tries to avoid the subject, but now that they are there, you can see Caduceus scrunch his face and take a stab at the subject:

C: “Fjord, you know why everybody is doing this, why we’re all here, right?”

And Fjord sighs heavily because, to a degree, I don’t think he understand the answer is “because we care about you and want to help you”. To Fjord, the answer is: “this is your fault, your responsibility”

F: “Yeah. I mean, I think.” C: “I think you know. I just wanna point it out ‘cause that woman, she doesn’t care what any of us want. I’m sure she’d be interested, but it’s way low in her priorities and I don’t trust anybody who keeps other people’s needs that low in the list. You should keep in mind all that, while you’re getting in bed with her, so to speak.”

Fjord: *panics*

Fjord: *desperately tries to convince Caduceus to keep this knowledge to himself*

And I think, Caduceus with his high AF perception, can tell why Fjord cares so much that this is kept from the others. It’s not like it’s something bad, it’s actually beneficial for their group as a whole (as iffy as that makes me because of the unequal power dynamic), and it has been suggested multiple times.... so what reason does Fjord have to keep it so fiercely in the down-low? 

Friction. 

“I think I get it. I’m not gonna talk out of term. I trust your intentions, so...”

And here’s a good part:

C: “You’re asking if I can tell that you’re conflicted?”

F: “No, I think that’s pretty clear.”

C: “You would be amazed, but alright.”

Because Caduceus knows that not everyone in the M9 —cough, Jester, cough— is convinced that this is all just a play on his part. 

Fjord goes on to reaffirm that he’s trying to keep Avantika close for the party’s good. 

okokokokok

MOVING ON

LET’S TALK ABOUT VERA’S TALK GO JESTER

LET’S TALK ABOUT VERA AFTER KNOWING THEM FOR LIKE 2 WEEKS SINGLING OUT JESTER AS THE PERSON WHO LOOKS AFTER FJORD

LET’S TALK ABOUT VERA TELLING JESTER TO LOOK AFTER FJORD BECAUSE AVANTIKA WILL HURT HIM

“He would not be the first she’s left in ruin. He would not be the last. I would take care of him, if he cannot.”

i am so frustrated that Laura/Jester seemed to misinterpret Vera’s warning help me god someone please bring it up on Talks or something because it will bother me forever

When they are planning: 

Caleb: What if Fjord keeps Avantika busy... 

Beau: Do we need to have him distract Avantika? Can’t we just go now?

...

Beau: And we can have [Caleb] make sure that [Fjord and Avantika] are busy. If you [Fjord] are comfortable with that. You don’t have a lot of a choice. 

FJORD

JESTER

*Nott keeps planning*

JESTER

J: Well, Caduceus is very perceptive. 

F *having flashbacks of Jester going down in the jungle*: THE TWO CLERICS ARE NOT GOING ON THE MISSION TOGETHER.

J: So we all wait until Fjord starts boning....

Fjord’s face journey tho

he is so confused help him

when your crush who was jealous is suddenly ok with u sleeping with someone else

wait i thought she liked me

Fjord’s worried overprotective mode ON as soon as Caduceus casually mentions that two guards stabbed each other and probably everything is pandemonium 

Jester saying they should frame Vera was clearly rooted on her misunderstanding Vera’s warning, but I really like that as soon as she thought someone was a direct threat to Fjord she was like “nope gotta get rid of them”.

Avantika’s notes talk about her having dreams about people who were close to her “chaining her back” and how she had to get rid of them...

...and we’ve seen hints of that with Vandrin and Sabien in Fjord’s dream the other time....

...but I’m calling it that we’ll eventually see Uk’otoa try to pit him against the M9 and the one he’s closest to is Jester by far and I’m sure we’re gonna get some dramatic moment out of it I can’t waiiiit

*After reading the journal*

J: Fjord, as you as crazy as she is? Because holy shit.

Fjord:

I LOVE THEM GOOFING AROUND PLS MAKE EACH OTHER SMILE IN THIS TRYING TIMES

and likek

thanks i love them

anyway

in two weeks

if they don’t die

tune in to see me keep screaming about this two, and cross your fingers for a one on one talk if they manage to get a breather away from Avantika