#millenium isn’t included bc I didn’t want to

[yomiurinikei]

Hey!! You can totally decline (I got no idea if your ask box is open)

But can you write some random Utsuro hc?

I love my man way to much

siiiiiighs. i tried to make this longer i really did </3…. simply wasn’t in the stars! the world doesn’t want me to be crazy abt utsuro. oh my fuckass neighbor is being weird again. gdi ANYWAYS !!

anyways!! my inbox is always open, i’m really bad at getting ask memes done admittedly, but hc requests ALWAYS get finished (even if my memory loss become an issue and i forget that someone requested hcs. tee hee. totally not what happened here)

anyways!! order up here it is i hope u enjoy!!! 🫶

~*~

•spends a lot of time inside (always finds people looking for a housesitter, wins a raffle to go travel to a event w/ hotel charges includes, etc) and swears up and down that he hates being outside

•but then when he actually steps foot outdoors he likes it a lot

•there’s nothing to really do, so while he gets bored p quick, he isn’t really actively engaging with his divine luck, past the weather being nice and things like that, he gets to just chill, and let the hours go by

•used to play puzzle games, bc he figured even if he knew the solution on instinct, he at least had to pass the time by moving pieces and the like

•then he tried 2048 and noticed he always got the tiles he needed, and that without thinking, he always made the best move to combine pieces,

•and started paying more attention, and realized that even if he was actively engaged in smthn else, his hands would just move on their own to play

•aaaand he promptly got fed up with it all and hasn’t played anything like that since

•gives like. really really bad advice. just absolutely horrible advice 

•example: he has -3 street smarts and will ONE HUNDRED PERCENT give u horrible advice that will get u mugged. 

•he has never had any reason to fear for his life or safety (his well being and mental health is shot to hell but-) and it is very apparent in the way he will just. completely casually walk across a highway to save time when going somewhere

•for a guy who could probably solve the millenium prize problems immediately if he knew they existed, he is. not very smart

•speaking of. i 100% believe he has all those great internationally known puzzles/treasure hunts/etc solved. he just chooses not to share

•has some degree of enhanced/higher senses (has vision over 20/20, does well keeping track of distinct sounds in noisy places) but this contributes to his misery

•he can pick out every little thing he’s tasting, and it keeps flavors from blending together well, picks out the wrong scent notes in perfumes-

•OH simultaneously touch starved and touch averse. 

•he’s generally finicky about textures/what touches him (you see how my train of thought arrived at this station), and also generally doesn’t feel comfortable around others

•so like… while he’s not really conscious of it, his subconscious is screaming for contact with another person, but whenever akane (who ELSE is trying to have physical contact w this guy) is like… 🥹? and tries to get a hug from him he just. activates the self destruction protocols.

•like. just stiffens up and just waits for it to be over.

•bc his thought process isn’t “i wish this was a better hug” but rather “i wish this was OVER !!” he doesn’t have a positive experience w it because his luck doesn’t kick in and make him feel okay/make the hug not be evil

•actually let’s talk about blesseds more. i imagine he didn’t bless many youngin’s because they were consistently very obnoxious @ him.

•like. i 100% believe that all the CoU tried to cling to/follow him if at all possible. from day One they were trying to find him (looking for any potential good caregiver) while adults were less active/persistent in their hunts

•so he kinda just went. 😐 and tried to stay away from kids when he was giving people fortune

•controversial i suppose but he has resting confused face. boy just always looks lost looks out of it looks ?

•”but whenever we see him in the games he’s going 😑” LISTEN. whenever we see utsuro in game he’s being exposed to the horrors. 

•i don’t say this to woobify him, he literally always is like noooo actually i did nothing wrong i am entirely passive and neutral and have no impact on everything ever. your actions are YOUR fault and not a result of me being insane to you. and it’s so hilarious to me to see. 

•but i do think it’s important to recognize there’s a Reason hes so like. no actually i’m devoid of agency… and that there’s trauma in that head !!!

•so yeah i think whenever we see him in game he’s yk. experiencing things. i think if u just saw him on the bus or whatever he’d look like he has no clue what’s going on ever. just a very very clueless resting face

[bthump]

What do you think about the point in the story we are at now? Would you say you like the direction Miura is going in or not? What are the things you dislike about Berserk as it is now?

lol this is hard to answer because it’s so heavily dependent on what happens next. I think we’re at a point where everything could start coming together in a way that really appeals to me or where everything could just fall apart and I’ll have to accept that this is no longer a story I’m particularly interested in.

Though I am slightly leaning towards the former right now, whether that’s based on real evidence or mostly blind optimism I’m not entirely sure lol.

Basically I think it’ll depend on a) whether Moonlight Boy becomes a major motivational plot point or turns out to be more of a red herring or brief inciting factor in the shift to a new arc, and b) whether Guts and the rpg group overcome the imminent challenge they’ll face thanks to their personal growth and friendship or whether it’ll fuck them up.

But the reasons I’m feeling tentatively optimistic right now are:

all the foreshadowing re Guts losing himself to the armour and wreaking some havok, which has to happen at some point lbr

fetus as the focal point of Casca’s traumatic memories and symbolizing her thorn-covered heart, which to me screams sacrifice material, which would be the only thing that could make it time sharing Griffith’s body interesting to me (ie what happens to Griffith if it’s sacrificed?)

I’m gonna link this post because I’m still mostly feeling the basics of this theory, ie Skull Knight and Elfhelm in cahoots plotting to use the behelit to entrap the godhand, at Guts and Casca’s expense. Plus another possible way for Moonlight Boy to come to nothing is if it’s a manipulation of Danann’s.

I think Guts is purposefully being written as emotionally distanced from the rpg group, which is a good sign for the power of friendship not saving him yet, and there are also aspects of Guts+rpg group that parallel Griffith+Hawks in the golden age (eg Farnese’s feelings for Guts being paralleled to Casca’s feelings for Griffith, Guts gaining followers who compare him to fire, etc) which also gives me hope that tragedy will strike.

Miura’s little bait and switch wrt Guts and Casca’s relationship that honestly felt like gentle mockery of people who wanted them to immediately get together lol. Yk Casca getting sent out in a pretty dress to meet Guts complete with romantic double page spread and having a breakdown, then changing into pants and cutting her hair and saying how much better it is, and not being able to look at Guts now.

Also more recently, Guts at a loss now that he’s brought Casca’s sanity back and it didn’t actually solve any of his issues. “The hell do I do now?” “You have reached the end of your journey. It is not always a happy thing.” I’ve been worried for a while that Guts’ complex issues have been dropped and we’re meant to see him taking Casca to Elfhelm as him genuinely growing past them, and that one moment was such a huge relief when I read it lol. It really suggests to me that this sidequest was always about Guts trying to find a distraction to avoid dealing with his actual issues (fear/trauma, insecurity, love/hate feelings for Griffith, regret, etc), and those are going to make a return sooner rather than later.

Miura implying in interviews that we’re not all that close to the end, so there’ll probably be at least one more arc after Elfhelm, which gives me more hope that this whole rpg arc will lead to some amount of narrative-shaking tragedy and we’ll get some interesting stuff after.

this parallel with the climax of the Millenium Falcon arc and my firm belief that it has to come full circle.

other stuff like complex apostle characters, the lost chapter worldbuilding, schierke suggesting that her elemental guardians are holy see angels alongside implications that holy see angels are the godhand. Basically my hopes for worldbuilding that doesn’t boil down to good spirit world vs evil spirit world.

all the little suggestions that NGriff isn’t as emotionless as he’d like to be that have nothing to do with a demon fetus giving a shit about its parents

So I guess my answer is that I do like the direction I hope Miura’s going in, but there’s also enough counter evidence that I may be wrong about that direction.

So some of the things I dislike about Berserk now are:

Moonlight Boy and the Fear that he will derail everything and the plot will soon revolve around, idk, Guts and Casca trying to free their kid’s soul bringing them closer together or some awful shit like that.

Moonlight Boy and the Fear that Miura is actually going to ignore the absolutely incredible foundation he wrote in the Golden Age to support the hints of Griffith’s current capacity for emotion in favour of pinning it all on a magic baby.

I have some lowkey fears that Guts “bleeding” for Casca is gonna be a thing, largely based on me recently re-reading the scene where Farnese gets upset about everything Guts has done for her while bathing her. Like yk, maybe Casca will remember Guts saving her and warm up to him... tho in all honesty I can’t actually think of an example of Guts being the one to save her post-Eclipse lmao, he fucks it up every time. Maybe when he first put on the armour and killed an apostle in front of her or w/e, yk. Some shit like that. Like I can come up with 50 counter arguments but those only work if you accept the basic premise that Berserk will be good, yk?

The fear that we are meant to understand that Guts has overcome most of his flaws throughout the Millenium Falcon/Fantasia arcs and will get a big moment to demonstrate that and overcome the armour or save Casca or whatever.

And less speculatively and more generally, like many people I’m not a fan of the current art style, I think the larger cast on Guts’ side is causing some poor writing and not helping the pacing issues (and tbh I think Berserk is paced fairly well up until the boat stuff), I don’t like the lighter more comedic tone right now bc I got into Berserk for the grimdark vibe and tragedy and characters succumbing to their fatal flaws and making huge mistakes and I miss that a lot. I’m not saying Berserk can’t be light and funny and campy but I prefer that Black Swordsman or Conviction Arc style where it’s offset by a lot of fucked up shit, or Golden Age style where there’s an underlying sense of dread bc we already know shit’s going to go wrong, yk? If shit does get dark soon I might end up being a lot less critical of the current tone on re-read tbf.

So basically to sum up:

hopes: tragedy, character flaws that haven’t been dealt with yet coming home to roost, Moonlight Boy becomes a non-issue.

fears: power of friendship staves off tragedy, slower gtsca romance, moonbaby affects plot and emotions, guts’ flaws get brushed under the rug instead of fucking him over

I can argue that the former makes a lot more sense than the latter, but I’ve been burned a lot in my life and I know a lot of fans would argue the latter makes more sense than the former so yk, everyone has their biases including me and idk how blinded I am by those biases lol.

Anyway ty for asking!

[earthdeep]

ok so

having finished silver snow I've now done all the story content easily available to me, even tho the two music tracks in the extras menu that are ???ed out still do worry me

and tbh I don't have much to say abt silver snow itself bc it is almost identical to verdant wind HOWEVER I'm taking this opportunity to ramble my thoughts on the game as a whole, in a format that will likely not make sense to myself let alone anyone else

I guess I'll start on my thoughts on the lords? + rhea bc she's basically a fourth lord. so like, personal fave is still edelgard bc I am gay and angry with the state of the world, followed by claude bc he's fun and also probably the best person out of all the major players in this game, then rhea further back for being fucking terrifying to me and yet also woefully incompetent at the act of doing anything important, and dimitri is waaaaaaaaaaaaay down at the bottom of the barrel bc I am not here for angry white boys. I'm incredibly disappointed in the fandom wrt how much they adore dimitri. not surprised, mind you, since I've seen the cullenites in the dragon age fandom and their years of bullshit. but still, el and claude have so much more going for them (and are hotter to boot lbr) that it makes it suuuuuuper difficult to claim race and gender has nothing to do with it. but I'm totally sharing some of that blame with the game too, bc dimitri did get brought up in a good light more than, say, claude did in the eagles routes. which is super shite since claude's the fucking helpful one. srsly I had to sit through dream!dimitri in silver snow and you couldn't give me another claude scene- oh my god I just realised I didn't here from him again after he went missing. son of a fuck my dude just disappeared. like I assume he ran off to almyra like every other time but I just never saw him again.

actually, since we're on the topic of claude not being widely beloved enough by the fandom for me not to side eye them, leeeeeeet's point out a little smth smth with 3h's darker skinned characters. bc.... eesh. dedue? absolute life debt mode to the whitest of boys, hobbies include household chores, big brawny lad who's only recently literate. if disney wrote this character he would currently be locked in the vault out of shame. but I guess if it's not a pattern- oh hello cyril. at least HIS life debt is to the whitest of ladies instead! literally, her dragon form is the actual colour white. at least catherine used to be a noble, even if it's in danger of being cancelled out by her also being a brigand. and I don't think she's any good at chores either which is good. but like, the devotion...

we have claude and petra too, who thankfully have lives of their own. but it's hard not to wince when claude is called some variant of sneaky for the hundredth time (he's all talk yo...) and petra's post timeskip outfit makes me feel kinda gross if I look at it too long. it's annoying bc her face makes me feel gay things and then the camera pans and I'm back to oh yeah, they really wanted the tropical princess halloween costume huh.

at least judith's cool. and even wears trousers. I've never seen her in action in my game bc I overlevel and get through fights too fast for her but we stan her on this blog anyway. and this is already the third 3h lady I've had this response to but I am super gay.

anyway that elephant has finally been ushered out of the room, time to ramble about narrative things. bc what the fuck was three houses doing? verdant wind and silver snow were the same but for the final boss (and BOY is that final boss an asspull in both routes) while azure moon is similar but with entirely different factions being discussed, then crimson flower is just HALF A ROUTE?? and tbh crimson flower was I think the best, not only bc it was p unique and let me hug edelgard but also bc it was as short as it was. all the other routes dragged to hell and back as a result of being restrained by the calendar. you have so much fucking energy by endgame that it's a fucking chore to use it all, and you can only go two weeks before you've taught everyone on your main team and need to go explore and feed them or give them shit and then you need to use up all your energy and collect some more ingredients for the meals you keep having and then decide what you're going to do with your free day now all your paralogues are done and you don't want for ore or gold or levels so do you- ugh I know I could just skip but it feels wrong to do when not story appropriate. the calendar system works during the academy phase and fits the almost slice of life feeling it has, but once there's a war on it just destroys the narrative tension. war isn't hell in three houses, war is purgatory.

and now for something completely different: the church n stuff. it sure is very based on the real life church! as an agnostic lesbian maybe you can guess how high my hackles raised whenever anything particularly churchy came up. I do wonder whether IS underestimated how heavily that could sway the viewpoint of the player. bc I walked in ready to burn that fucking monastery to the ground if I'm honest. it's rare to be able to do that to christianity allegories in video games (*cough*dragonage*cough*) so crimson flower appealed to me a lot in a way I'd guess wouldn't to certain others (*stares at the white boy stans*) and it's kind of a kick in the teeth to be railroaded into worrying abt rhea in verdant wind. I purposely avoided support with her during that run and yet my dialogue options the moment she vanished were byleth caring abt her well being. game, the most I care at this point is that she is alive enough to give me some fucking answers on the shit she's been doing this past millenium. and that specific factor makes me wonder whether silver snow was done first and basically copy pasted to serve as a different route, forgetting that the player may not have the same objectives since they've been rolling with claude the visionary for the past year.

honestly the golden deer in general get kinda shafted by the game. I've seen others point it out too, but they get like no exposure outside of claude unless you seek them out. of the eagles, edelgard and hubert are always major characters appearing as bosses multiple times, although the others do fall to the background. then dear god the lions. both ashe and sylvain have entire month's missions dedicated to a part of their backstory during the academy phase! and even while dimitri dies after a single battle away from his route, there's a good chance dedue's coming back for more. claude gets a couple letters and a single battle and then he's out. let us ally with claude you bastard of a game.

I got sidetracked there but like the ashe and sylvain getting prominent story beats in all routes I think was a bit of a lost opportunity. and also probably is the reason sylvain is actually as popular as he is. dude's kind of a scumbag and it really does take being contextualised by his obscene amount of trauma to start understanding or liking him. it also helps he's easy as fuck to recruit and a very viable unit so u have a gameplay route to getting attached to him (legit 3/4 of my playthroughs had me fielding him as one of my regulars).

but think of the potential to add that to other characters! imagine seeing the conditions that led leonie to obsess over jeralt! meeting all these (completely alive!) siblings we keep hearing about then not seeing! killing bernadetta's father! the possibilities are endless and could be easily explained by rhea assigning tasks to students who already have relevant context or whatever. just ugh some of the choices made by the writers annoy me.

sfdlkdfkjdj I don't know how to connect this last bit at all, bc it's just observations abt like the models n stuff. I like how they've obviously set materials up for all the models to easily change clothing colours to differentiate factions. that's cool. they did that with skin tones too, so if you zoom in on like the agarthans you can see their weird super pale complexion (tho for some reason their battalions have regular skin?). tho it does make it weird when the 2d portrait is always the same. this duscar soldier sure doesn't look like his profile pic.

anyway that was the last thing on my mind abt this game. kinda anticlimactic to end on, I know, but rather in the spirit of things. only crimson flower knows what a satisfying conclusion is, after all :) long live lady edelgard yo.