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#mine: i don't remember my go tag
eddievedders · 9 months
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GOOD OMENS — Chapter 5: The Ball.
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sciderman · 1 month
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I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain
Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it
i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)
really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!
undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.
i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.
people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.
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peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.
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it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."
so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.
people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.
autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.
#a lot of my traits have been exacerbated lately and i remember it was much easier for me before#and some of my friends have said “oh it's because you've been masking too long and now you're facing autistic burnout.”#and that made sense to me i think.#but then i found out about the stress thing. me overproducing stress hormone. and that's a very physical thing.#and that explains why i've been overstimulated more than usual lately. and why everything feels like too much.#and i wonder how many of these traits of mine are going to subside once i have lamar removed#and it makes me wonder a lot of things. and it's so weird how much your brain is tied to your biology.#i wonder how much i'll change. i wonder how i'll feel. i wonder if i'll still feel like me. i wonder how much me is me right now.#and how much of me is being altered by weird freaky hormones. who am i?? who will i be??#i'm almost looking at this as like. a superhero origin story of some sort. like this is my spider-bite moment. maybe.#will i be different? will i cope with things differently?? now that my body isn't fighting something anymore??#maybe i'll be normal. i don't know. i don't know.#i don't know what it'll mean for me.#but all of these things mean i relate to peter parker in a certain kind of way#i don't think you have to be diagnosed with autism to recognise and empathise with those traits i think#i think everyone can see themselves in peter. and i think that's the benefit of having characters that aren't diagnosed.#because there's so much overlap in the human experience. and certain feelings aren't exclusive to just one group of people.#peter has such a rich identity actually. it's an autistic thing. it's a queer thing. it's a jewish thing. it's a trauma thing.#there are so many overlapping parts of peter's identity that inform who he is and how he behaves and it's never just one thing.#it's a product of all of his things.#just like me! just like everyone.#so me? i guess i can be a million things. you can explain what i am in a million different ways.#a hundred different psychologists can all come up with different ways to explain why i be the way i be.#i don't think it's something that can be simplified.#sorry wow. i'm really going off here in the tags.#i hope people don't think i'm stupid. i don't know brain science. i'm just philosophising as usual.#sci speaks
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matchacake · 2 months
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An unwanted visitor stops by late in the night. Thankfully the door is locked, but he definitely gave poor Charmmy a fright!
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raayllum · 10 months
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if rayla has to stab callum in order to protect ezran i think that’d be very cash money
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ziipzeepzop-eez · 3 months
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'' S̶A̶L̶T̶ ̶L̶I̶C̶K̶ ''
t̲r̲i̲u̲m̲p̲h̲ ̲r̲i̲n̲g̲s̲ ̲b̲e̲a̲u̲t̲y̲.̲
. . .
Akin to my personal salt lick,
I split open my tongue
On what I say.
Is it a revel?
I'll never use my verbal voice again.
My lips will never twitch,
Maybe only to crack a smile.
An inevitable smirk, a triumph
In the face of my enemies.
"Shut up!" they cry.
Never, I respond in kind.
I will leave behind my legacy
Of
Words.
I will be one with the immortal figures of history,
the Ones who Wrote,
Scribbled,
Scratched,
Typed,
Spoke.
I am no dog.
I won't be kicked aside.
I will break, over and over again until
I am unbreakable.
My throat will be slit,
My vocal chords shredded,
My tonsils removed by
The clawed hands of
Iniquity —
But my voice.
Oh, my beautiful,
Timeless,
Voice,
Will live on for the strongholds to come.
They will be carried by the winds of
My whistles and whispers.
Be strengthened by the
Gust of my Roars,
Sweetened, Charmed
By my serenades.
My heart was touched by an oath,
And a legend it will stand to be.
It probably couldn’t have been stopped, anyway.
Triumph.
Ring true for me.
Never, ever end.
#zeepie beep : original works! ⭒๋࣭ ⭑🖋˚𔓘。#mini rant in the tags?? 😆😅#the writer in me was WILDIN when i wrote this#just now posting it?#mm.#original poem#free verse#writblr#original work#i think i wrote this when i was going thru something angsty!#when i was little i was told i talk too much.#and i did!! i was a little chatterbox. i can admit that#but it kinda hurt when i was told that i was talking JUST because i liked the sound of my own voice#like no. i just wasn't silenced at that time. 🥲#undiagnosed adhd i am /pretty/ sure!#because as much as i can remember — half the time i didn't even realize i was talking xdd#i would just say whatever came to my mind.#it's glorified now. at the very most it's a protected trait (in some cases)#when i was a kid - in a family like mine - it was not.#i don't blame them for treating me the way they did - but that don't mean it didn't hurt. y'know?#i still AM a chatterbox of sorts!! but I'm also quiet by development.#my voice is a lot deeper - and it's soft around the edges.#and i bristle when people i know say something like “you're so quiet now!” “what's wrong?” “you used to be so happy.”#WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLL DO YOU MEANNNNNN. 🤣🤣😭😭😭#like. stop putting me in a box?#people change when they get older. and it's not even that!#after the shit i've gone thru - i think i deserve my sweet bubble of silence. don't you?#I don't owe you an explanation.#i will speak when i want to.#and i will not be silenced.
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billpottsismygf · 9 months
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I'm only 5 episodes into TNG (4 if you count it like Netflix does) but everything I've been promised about Data is true. I adore him and can't stop thinking about the way he's written and performed.
Also his relationship with Geordi, which is so adorable! They're like the naughty little boys in class, whispering "Yankee traders" to each other during a diplomatic call and playing with finger puzzles when they should be working. I love them.
I also really like Dr Crusher, and her dynamic with Picard is very fun. Riker is charming and interesting so far, and I want to know how come he's so strong (somehow not succumbing to Drunk Disease until long after he'd already passed it on to others, seemingly not being knocked out in one hit by the Ferengi weapons).
Tasha's intriguing, especially with her hinted at backstory, and I feel like Worf has hardly had a look in yet but I want to know more about him.
I'm just really impressed by what a good ensemble cast this is. The plots of last couple of episodes could have been a little tighter (explaining what exactly the stakes of the challenge are in Code of Honor, and what/who the portal is in The Last Outpost and whether he's mind reading Riker and like, what's actually going on), but they were still engaging all the way through.
There are some uncomfortable elements here and there, and I'm especially aware ahead of time the way Ferengi are portrayed is Not Great, but it's far more watchable than TOS and I can tell I'm going to get really into this show!
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clumsyclifford · 1 year
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“We’re not gonna die today, though.” “No, we’re not.”
a demigods!malum moodboard inspired by Win or lose I’m screwed by my sweet betrothed and recipient of my holiday edit exchange edit @cringeycal
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corbinite · 6 months
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watched through steven universe future for the first time almost two weeks ago and I still feel kinda messed up about it
#mine#personal#su future spoilers in the tags below#I weirdly saw myself in a lot of what he was going through#don't fully know where that came from#the part where he runs away to jasper and Changed in particular kind of took me out of my body#I mean I can be kind of suggestible and prone to identity disturbance so there's very likely at least an element of that here#but still#there were just some notes there that hit in a weird and uncomfortable way#also the part where he was mad at his dad and all his dad could focus on was how that fit into his own projection of how things should go#and it just made him madder#I can understand why I reacted to that part at least#(my dad turned into the kind of person I can talk to about trauma AFTER the chance to actually process it right had already expired)#(and he tells me whenever it comes up that if I want to just yell at him I can do it I can just yell at him and he'll take it)#(and I already know that wouldn't help me)#(there's certain things that can't really be fixed and there's just nothing to do but move forward)#(especially cause so much of the source of the trauma is a distant memory by now)#(so even if the emotional scars are still there what would I even yell about when I barely remember the events any more)#anyway yeah I understand why steven got so pissed at greg about wanting him to rebel#also I think the arc where steven sought out jasper unearthed some of my self esteem issues re: my history of anger#there's a darkness inside of me sometimes I scare myself yada yada insert shadow hedgehog jpeg#but yeah when I say that arc took me out of my body I mean it KNOCKED me out and I'm still sort of re-sewing my soul back in place#discombobulated as all hell#did more talking in the tags than I expected here
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gillianthecat · 1 year
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I'm in a bad mood for no reason* and every third post I see or article I read is pissing me off. But instead of angrily reblogging them with why they are dumb, I'm going to instead use this is an excuse to get a secret off my chest:
I loathed Mistborn. I thought it was one of the most amateurish-ly written books I've ever read. I do not at all understand the massive love for it.
*ok there probably are reasons and I do have guesses about why but they're annoying reasons and I don't want them
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alexa-crowe · 1 year
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.
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mayonakano-archive · 1 year
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i'm going to delete this later but i need to just. yell.
#delete later#vent in tags#anyway uhhhhh any time i even so much as think in the direction of college i start crying so thats a good sign /s#given that i. almost never cry :)#i am. terrified. in the optimal world i'd just drop out and live under my bed or something because my issues are. frankly overwhelming#at this point. i can barely sleep properly despite trying to keep a proper schedule (i woke up at THREE this morning.)#im constantly flipping between being almost suicidally depressed and feeling nothing at all and it's terrible. i don't have any real#desire to hurt myself and most of my intrusive thoughts go the way of 'you should break stuff/hurt others/etc' but man#sometimes i have to step away from stuff just because i see a knife or a fork and wonder what i can do with it.#college makes me terrified and i know my parents fucking suck because otherwise they'd care a little more about the fact#that i can barely do anything or function but nah. all they want is the perfect little child. and now i'm paralyzed#i don't trust my ability to work because of my exhaustion and i know once i go to uni i can't count on any support from my parents#whatsoever so i'm just... stuck. uni's meant to be less grueling in terms of hours than HS but...#stacking work and school sounds like fucking HELL but i don't have the money or support to NOT work...#so all i can do is stress and stress and stress and stress and struggle to even start my essay and feel everything slipping away#because god? do i even remember half of the days i live through anymore? do i even care about the work i'm doing?#no. i'm dogshit at programming to the point where i've been stuck for a month. i can barely do work without spacing out or ignoring class#entirely just to talk to my brother because at least THERE's a little joy in my life. everything else feels so bleak and pointless#i can't do anything meaningful with this godawful life of mine. but all i can do is keep muddling through. because nothing scares me more#than the idea of dying. so that's off the table. so i'll just keep stressing and crying and wondering if it's even worth it.#ugh... if anyone actually read all this just pretend you didn't...
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eddievedders · 9 months
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David Tennant as Anthony J. Crowley "I Know Where I'm Going featuring the minisode The Resurrectionists".
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pulsedemons · 3 months
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uhurrrgh,, missing my old url
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suprsingr · 1 year
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#i'm going to keep tag-rambling because this feels like progress#other post cut me off so new post okay people can see this#if you're reading this welcome to my mental breakdown#anyway so i froze in the middle of telling this awful joke#he told us to google a quick joke and just tell it and my service was down#so i tried to remember a joke i read on a forum nearly twenty fucking years ago#i do think part of the problem was that i wasn't confident in the joke at all#everyone else's jokes were proper ones mine was just a Knock Knock joke sort of a thing#idk but i froze and it was really awful#of course people were nice about it!! and i fucking hated it so much#i just want to be able to be good for people but i'm bad for myself so i just don't know#if that wasn't bad enough then i was like. ok. i need to talk to the teacher because wtf. idk if this is sane#but the elevators were filling up and dudebro was like ''lol you waiting for everyone to go''#and i did my autopilot thing of like ''yes! that's what i'm doing'' even tho it was not#so i got into the elevator when it came back up with these two dudes even tho I WANTED TO TALK TO THE TEACHER#sometimes i feel like my body is just a puppet and i'm the puppeteer but i'm passed out#i'll wake back up seconds after the puppet's done something idiotic and there's no going back so i'm just in hell#anyway to make matters worse part of why I got in was because i didn't want to be the weirdo staying after to talk to the teacher#i was like ''wait is this not allowed''#why the fuck would it not be allowed#''well it'll make the teacher feel awkward''#it is. literally. his job. :)#he's getting paid it's fucking okay but do i listen to the reasonable voices in my head? no#i listen to the voice that says ''well if you breathe it'll make people uncomfortable so you should stop''#but then if i died that would make people uncomfortable too :) the grand paradox#but anyway my POINT is actually TWO OTHER PEOPLE WERE STAYING and I HAD NO IDEA#UNTIL THE ELEVATOR DOORS WERE ALREADY CLOSING#OKAY COOL and then as I was driving away i spotted them walking to a bar with the teacher#so if i had overcome my anxiety and stayed i could have been a normal person for a while with a few cool chill people#but instead :) i'm me
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marvelouslizzie · 7 months
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Like Someone I Know
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summary: You decide to take a break from studying and go to a masked party but your casual hookup turns out to be your biggest rival, Bucky Barnes.
pairing: College!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
warnings: 18+, academic rivals, alcohol consumption, hidden identities, hookup, boob worship, semi-public sex, pet names, oral sex (female receiving), protected sex, dirty talk, praise kink, no mention of y/n.
word count: 2.4K
A/N: @notafunkiller gave me "I don't care if they're gonna see it. I'm not giving them back." and academic rivals as prompt and now here we are… I hope you enjoy this random story. Thanking Andreea also for the editing and for the name suggestion. She’s the best!
All work is mine, please do not repost or translate without my permission.
Keep reading tag starts after the second paragraph of the story.
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This isn’t like you. You don’t find people attractive this easily, let alone hook up with them at a party, right after meeting them. It feels surreal… like you are having some kind of a fever dream. Maybe it’s because of the alcohol you consumed, but you don’t feel tipsy. So maybe not.
His hands roam on your body, hungrily discovering every inch. His lips are relentless, sucking and licking. It feels so damn good and it’s just so hard to resist. You deserve to let go sometimes. You work so hard, right? It’s okay to hook up with a handsome stranger. Well, you aren’t sure about the handsome part. Not when half of his face is covered by some kind of mask, but his piercing blue eyes tell you he might be the most handsome man you have ever seen. They also seem familiar somehow and you don’t know how that’s possible.
He stops kissing you, while his hands are still on your hips. He looks you in the eye, and it makes you shiver. You finally realize why he feels so familiar and it makes you uncomfortable. Those blue eyes… They remind you of Bucky Barnes. Why on earth would you find someone attractive because they look like him?
“Is everything alright?”
Even his voice… It sounds kinda like him. Not completely though. Bucky’s voice is usually harsher. He sounds like he’s trying to poison you with words. Especially when he makes fun of you after getting a better grade. God, you hate him so much.
“Yeah, yeah.” Your answer sounds so absent and not convincing at all.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I just realized you look like someone I know.”
“Oh, darling…” God, the way he smiles! There’s no way this man can be ugly. That smile punches you in your stomach. “There’s no way you know me.”
“Why is that?”
“Because I would remember a beauty like you.”
That makes you laugh. It sounds so cheesy. Plus he can’t even see half of your face. How could he even remember you?
“I mean it.” 
“I’m sure you used that line on girls before.” 
“I can’t say…” He stops for a second, trying to find the right words. “I do this often.”
“You mean hooking up with strangers at a party?”
“No.” His answer confuses you for a second. “Hooking up at all.”
Oh, that can’t be true. Those blue eyes can convince anyone to do anything. Maybe he’s just trying to make you feel special, and truth be told, it doesn’t matter. You don’t know him. 
“Why is that?”
His hands caress your hips gently. “Usually… I don’t let myself get distracted.”
“Sorry for distracting you, then.” 
Your playful answer makes him smile. He starts kissing your neck. His hands move on your ass, kneading while he keeps on kissing you. His lips move closer and closer to your cleavage. You know this is your last chance to say anything if you don’t wanna go further, but you can’t find the strength in yourself to stop him. His lips are soft and wet on your skin. Every kiss he lays on your skin makes you want more. You don’t know if you can stop him. 
Suddenly he grabs your tits, pushing them together while he buries his head between them. It makes you gasp, and he inhales your scent like he can’t get enough of it. 
“I want them in my mouth.”
He looks up, his eyes pleading for your consent.
“Can I?”
“Someone might come in any time.” You don’t wanna get caught like that. “They might see us.”
"I don't care if they're gonna see it. I'm not giving them back." His response makes you smile. He sounds so desperate while still holding your tits. And like it isn’t enough, he starts to beg. “Please… Can I?”
“Yeah, yeah.” You sound breathy, just because of the anticipation. You just want to enjoy this moment, not thinking about anything else.
He pushes down the straps. He doesn’t even bother unclasping your bra. He just frees your tits and starts sucking on your nipple. Your head is thrown back with sudden pleasure. His tongue dances around your nipple, making you squirm.
“God, you are so delicious.” 
He switches to your other nipple. He licks, bites, and sucks while you try to keep your voice down. It’s not easy. A couple of moans slip away. You are just glad this is a party and the music is loud enough to conceal any sound you make.
Suddenly he lets go of your nipple. The wet pop makes you bite your lip. 
“I really need to taste you.” You give him a confused look. Isn’t he already doing that? “Down there.” He quickly adds.
You don’t know what to say. You expected a quick fuck at best, that’s what the girls told you. Don’t have high expectations for hookups. They end pretty quickly and you might end up unsatisfied. But he’s proving you wrong every step of the way.
He keeps looking at you with a glow. God, his eyes are so freaking beautiful! Even if you didn’t want that, it would be so hard to say no. You finally nod, giving him permission.
“Thank you.” He quickly gets on his knees and hikes up your dress. 
He starts to kiss your thighs, then he brings his nose onto your clothed pussy and just inhales.
“You smell so freaking good, d-darling.”
The praise makes you shiver. Not just because you aren’t used to it, but he also sounds so much like Bucky when he says darling. He calls you doll in a way that makes you feel degraded. Like you’re nothing more than a beautiful doll. No brains. No talent. Just there to look pretty. But this time… It doesn’t make you feel small. It makes you feel like a goddess.
Your shivering doesn’t go unnoticed, though. He smiles like a devil, looking into your eyes. Then he grabs your underwear and just pushes it down. You feel unbelievably exposed. Your breasts are sticking out of your dress while your pussy is right in front of him. But the hunger on his face makes you feel better.
“Such a pretty pussy.” He licks his lips before diving in. He grabs one of your legs and hikes it up on his shoulder, creating more space for himself to work. 
He starts you eat you eagerly. His tongue moves smoothly between your folds and he sets a pace that makes it harder to shut your mouth. His tongue discovers every inch of you. Then suddenly he switches on sucking your clit, making you moan loudly.
“Jesus fucking christ!”
You feel him smile as he stops sucking for a second. His hands reach for your hips, steadying you while he goes back to sucking your clit. Once again your head is thrown back. You try to steady your breathing, but it doesn’t work. Your orgasm comes crashing in.
“Fuckk! I’m coming!” You don’t realize how loud you say it. You don’t realize how harshly you grab his hair and make him moan against your clit. Yet he doesn’t stop. Not until your shaking calms down.
The moment he’s sure you rode out every last bit of your orgasm, he moves away from you. When he looks up, he realizes your mask moved a little bit. Just enough to make him recognize who you are. His eyes are wide open, but you don’t notice any of it. You are still breathing heavily, trying to collect yourself.
He suddenly stands up and places his hands on the wall, caging you in. He looks like he wants to say something, but he can’t find the words. You assume it’s because of his unmet needs. So instead of questioning him, you move your hands to his pants. He watches you unbuckling and unzipping him. Then you look back at his face, silently asking for permission, and he nods.
You get rid of his pants and boxers with his help before he grabs his cock like he’s getting ready. Your words, though, stop him.
“We are not doing this without a condom.”
You don’t know what you expected, but you didn’t expect him to smile.
“Smart girl.”
The way he says that turns you on even more. The only problem is that he starts to sound more and more like Bucky. While you are trying to push away the thought of your biggest rival, he takes his wallet out and finds a condom.
“You don’t do this often, but you have a condom in your wallet.” You can’t help but point out.
“Every guy has one in their wallet. Just in case…” He responds while putting on the condom. “Doesn’t mean we think we’ll get lucky.”
“Well, you are certainly getting lucky tonight.”
“Oh, don’t I know it?”
He suddenly lifts you up against the wall. It’s so unexpected, yet it makes your blood rush. His lips find yours once again, but this time, it feels different. You don’t know what changed. You can’t put your finger on it. It was already passionate, hungry, and curious before, but this time… It’s just on another level. 
“Ready?” You know what he’s asking about.
“Yeah.” You find yourself nodding and he smiles.
“That eager, huh?” His voice is deep and full of impatience, but also some kind of belittlement. God, that Bucky really messed up with your head. 
He doesn’t wait for your answer. He gently pushes himself inside you, and you can’t help but moan out loud. A part of you feels embarrassed that you can’t seem to shut your mouth. You’re not used to this. It makes you feel exposed.
“Yes!” He sounds like he accomplished the most important thing in the world. “Don’t hold back those pretty sounds.”
You don’t know what to say, all you can focus on is the way his words make you wetter and wetter. You feel like you are discovering a part of you that you didn’t know existed. Maybe all you need is to hear how good you are doing. Is it why you are working this hard to get the best grades possible?
He doesn’t let you question more about yourself when he finally starts to move. It feels so overwhelming that you forget about anything else.
“Oh god…” He moans right next to your ear as his fingers are gripping on your skin. “You are so wet, doll.” You freeze. What did he just say?
“Bucky?”
Your heart starts to race faster than before. You don’t know what you are feeling. Shock, fear, excitement… This might be your worst nightmare. Or your biggest dream. 
“I swear to god,” he starts to talk with haste, trying to explain himself before you get the wrong idea. “I didn’t know it was you. You have to believe me.” The fear in his voice is so audible. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him fearing something like this before. “After your first orgasm,your mask slipped a little.”
You suddenly feel relief washing over you. You felt so dumb for a second, thinking he might have tricked you. Knowing he’s afraid just like you helps a lot. He didn’t plan this. Maybe it's just a twist of fate. You reach for his mask and take it off without saying anything. There’s no need for it anymore. He smiles in response. You can see he wants to do the same, but he’s still carrying you, so you take off your own mask, too
 He looks into your eyes, trying to see if you are still okay with this. 
“Come on, big guy, move!”
His devilish grin returns. He bounces you on his arms, securing your position, and then starts to move again. His lips find yours, and you moan into his mouth. You can’t believe you are actually having sex with Bucky Barnes. You have had a couple of wet dreams about him, but you never thought it would turn into reality. You never thought he would be into you. He starts to lose control and move faster than before. 
“Oh shit!” You feel like you might come soon. “Faster. Please!”
“So needy.” He grips on your ass. You don’t know why but his words rub you the wrong way.
“Don’t belittle me.” You snap back, and it makes him stop. You frown, thinking he’s gonna get you off and leave you unsatisfied.
“I never belittle you.” He’s looking into your eyes. “I never meant to belittle you.”
“You are not?” You always thought he was. You thought he was trying to put you down, demotivate you. Even if he was saying something nice.
“Never, doll. You are the smartest person I have ever met.”
You never heard him say this before. Maybe he just didn’t want to admit it back then. 
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
“And the prettiest girl.” 
You crash your lips onto his, kissing him like you can’t survive without it. You had no idea how much you wanted to hear something like this coming from him. He moans into your mouth while he starts to move again.
“I don’t think-” He sounds so pained. “I can- hold back any longer.”
You’re not so far away from reaching your climax. All you need is him moving just a bit harder, then you might be able to come with him.
“Please, come with me!” You don’t care how desperate it sounds. “I just need it a little harder.”
That breaks his defense. He starts to move so fast that it takes your breath away. After a couple of thrusts, your body starts to shake uncontrollably.
“Bucky!” You can’t stay silent. “I’m- coming.”
“Come for me, doll. Make a mess.” His thrusts grow sloppier. You can see he’s losing control because of you. “So fucking pretty. Can’t believe I get to see you like this.” You are sure his grip on your ass will leave some bruises, but you don’t care. It feels so good. He makes you feel so good. “Oh fuck!” 
He looks so pretty while he’s coming. The way he moans… The way his eyes flutter with each thrust… You watch every detail while coming yourself, wanting to memorize it. 
Then he opens his eyes. His pretty blue eyes shine in a way that feels warm, cozy, and downright giddy.
“I can’t believe we really did that.” He’s still holding you. You wonder how that is even possible. You always thought he looked strong, but this is on another level.
“Now tell me,” You sound confident and satisfied. “For how long did you want to do that?”
He chuckles in a way that makes you feel needy all over again.
“Oh, you have no idea.” 
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hintsofhoney · 6 months
Text
Don't Forget It
Paring(s): Dean Winchester x F!Reader
Summary: While working a case with Dean, he gets jealous of the way you interact with a suspect and decides to remind you who you belong to.
Tags: 18+, p in v, unprotected sex (be smart), rough sex, jealous dean, spanking, light dom/sub dynamics, sex in a public place, begging, voyeurism if you squint
Word Count: 2.2k
A/N: Just another finished work that's been sitting in my drive, collecting dust. Beta'd by my loves @makeadealwithdean and @wayward-dreamer; love you both to the moon and back 🤍 GIF is mine. Enjoy!
You can also read me on Ao3!
DEAN WINCHESTER MASTERLIST |  SUPERNATURAL MASTERLIST |  MAIN MASTERLIST
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You don’t miss the way Dean’s eyebrow raises when you lift one leg to sit on the man’s desk, twirling your hair and batting your eyelashes as you try to get him to confess. You’re fully aware of the way your pencil skirt is riding up, revealing more skin than you care to show to this douchebag probably-murderer, but it’s clear that he’s way more interested in speaking to you than Dean. If it helps move the case along, you can turn on the charm.
Dean’s watching you from the corner of the room as you flirt with the sleazebag, his jaw clenching as he reminds himself that you’re just doing your job, but it doesn’t make him want to remind you who you belong to any less. Especially when you look like that . Tight skirt, the top three buttons of your blouse undone, and then when you lean over pretending to laugh at something this guy had said, he catches a glimpse of your black lace bra, and he finds himself trying not to think about ripping it off of you. Not that it was working.
“You know, you’re a pretty little thing, Agent,” the man smirks, and then he’s reaching for the exposed part of your thigh and you’re wishing he wouldn’t , and Dean clears his throat so loudly it startles the both of you. You hop off the desk as the suspect turns around to look at him.
“I think we’re done here,” Dean says, walking over to the desk and pulling a fake business card with his real phone number on it out of his inner suit jacket pocket. “If you remember anything, Mr. McAnn, give me a call.” He tosses the card carelessly onto his desk.
Mr. McAnn huffs. “Yeah, alright, Agent.”
You and Dean both know the phone call isn’t coming; you’re going to need to find another way to prove the dickhead sitting in front of you murdered his wife — possessed or not.
“Let’s go, Y/N,” Dean grits out, his eyes not leaving Mr. McAnn’s as he walks to the door. You follow suit, and the anger in your boyfriend’s voice doesn’t go unnoticed. Dean’s already ten steps ahead of you by the time you’re fully out of the office.
“Dean!” you call after him, speed-walking to match his brisk pace down whatever corporate building hallway you were in. “Slow down, I’m in heels!” 
You catch up to him and grab his wrist, spinning him around. 
“The hell’s gotten into you?” 
He huffs in disbelief, his hands coming to rest on his hips as he tongues the inside of his cheek, thinking of how to answer that question. 
“You can’t be serious,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest and raising your eyebrows, realizing what’s gotten his panties in a twist. “I was trying to get him to confess , Dean.”
“I’m not — I know. Okay? But —” he pauses, beginning to stalk towards you, a hunger in his eyes that tells you exactly where this interaction is heading. You nearly trip over yourself as you walk backwards, a soft gasp leaving your lips when your back hits the wall. “Doesn’t mean I like watching you slutting it up for the asshole.” 
He’s got you fully caged in between his arms now, one hand on either side of your shoulders, his face inches away from yours. 
“You’re mine .”
You roll your eyes. As hot as he is when he’s jealous and possessive, it’s not like he can fuck you in this hallway. Plus, he’s being ridiculous anyway. 
“Your point ?” you prod, probably further than you should. 
“My —” he huffs again, his hands back on his hips, shaking his head before looking around. “Oh, I’ll show you my fucking point, sweetheart.”
He grabs your wrist, ignoring your squeal, and drags you a few feet down the hall, turning into the women’s bathroom and locking the door behind him. His eyes quickly scan underneath the three stalls before he determines the two of you are alone. 
“Dean —”
He cuts off your protest with his hands on your waist, walking you back into the nearby sinks before hoisting you up onto the counter. 
“Dean!” you yelp in surprise. 
He pays it no mind as he reaches for your blouse, tearing it open in one quick motion, plastic buttons clattering to the floor.
“Dean!” you scold, and Jesus, how many times can you say his name in different ways in one minute?
He remains unphased, focused on two things and two things only, both of which he reveals as he pulls down the cups of your bra.
“Christ, Y/N,” he breathes, cupping your breasts in his hands as he stares at them like it’s his first time ever seeing boobs. His thumbs flick over both of your nipples at the same time, and you arch your back as a moan escapes you.
“Mm, fuck.”
He leans in, his breath fanning over your earlobe as he continues tweaking your nipples. “Might as well have shown that dickhead in there these fuckin’ tits, the way your shirt was hanging open. Left really fuckin’ little to the imagination, Y/N,” he whispers, drawing more sounds from your throat. “He was probably sitting there thinking about doing all the things I’m doing to you right now. And I don’t like that. That’s my fuckin’ point.” He pinches one of your nipples, a yelp leaving your lips. “Understand?”
You nod, unable to form words.
“I can’t hear you.” He pinches the other peak and pulls a little. 
“Oh — fuck! Yes, I understand,” you answer. “I’m yours, I’m yours.” 
“And don’t forget it.” 
His lips find your breasts, and soon he’s sucking bruises into your skin and teasing your nipples with his tongue. He’s everywhere at once, everywhere but where you really need him, and you’re not sure how much more of this torture you can take.
“Dean, please,” you gasp, and he lets out an irritated grunt as he pulls his mouth off one of your breasts, seeming annoyed that you had interrupted his fun with your begging. You can’t blame him – he’s a boob guy. Especially if they’re your boobs. 
“I’m not done yet,” he states, before resuming his attack – for lack of a better word – on your breasts.
You groan in protest, the heat between your thighs building, and you spread your legs as far as your skirt will allow. The cool air that hits your core reminds you that you had chosen to forego underwear today, and you reach down to shimmy your skirt up to your hips while Dean’s still focused on your breasts. You’re able to spread your legs a bit further now, and you can’t help but chuckle at the fact that your boyfriend still hasn’t noticed you fully on display. 
He pulls away an inch or so when he hears your giggling. “Somethin’ funny?”
“You really are a boob guy, huh?” You shake your head in disbelief, biting back a smile. He furrows his eyebrows in confusion, and you use the opportunity to lean forward, simultaneously pulling him towards you by his shoulders so you can whisper in his ear. “You’ve been so focused on them you haven’t taken the time to look down yet, have you?”
He pulls away, still confused, until his eyes dart down to your core. “Jesus – wait – did you –”
“Was debating between those panties you really like or just foregoing them altogether,” you shrug.
“Fuck,” he breathes, staring at your dripping core for a few moments before a second wave of feral hunger hits him. “ Fuck .”
Before you can even process his movements, you’re bent over the counter instead of sitting on it, your legs kicked apart with two fingers plunging into your heat. 
“Oh my – Dean !” you squeal at both the abruptness and the roughness of it all.
“Don’t know what you expected, sweetheart, walking around with everything on fuckin’ display.” He crooks his fingers at just the right angle, and you bite back a scream.
“I – fuck – nothing w-was on display – oh God !” 
“Might as well have been. This tight little skirt of yours doesn’t leave much to the imagination, either. And then to find out there’s been nothing underneath it this whole time?”
“Ow!” you exclaim, as a loud smack fills the air, courtesy of Dean’s hand landing on your bare ass. 
“ Louder ,” he growls. “I want the whole fuckin’ building to know they can imagine whatever they want, but I’m the only one who gets to act on it.” He pulls his fingers out of you and spanks you again.
“De – oh, fuck !” you choke out. “Please, Dean.”
“Please what?” he asks nonchalantly, and you can hear his belt buckle clinking behind you.
“Fuck me. Please, I need you to fuck me.”
“ Need me to, huh?” You hear the zipper of his slacks, and you shift your weight in anticipation, your ass squirming. He lands another smack on your left cheek – the hardest one yet.
“DEAN!” you yelp, and you’re certain the entire building heard that one.
“There you go. Now beg that loud and I may just give you what you want,” he chuckles, grabbing a fistful of your hair and bringing your face up from the counter while he runs his cock through your soaked folds. 
“Please!” you groan.
“Mm-mm, not hearin’ you, sweetheart.”
“Deaaaan!” you whine, pushing your hips back, trying to force him inside you. 
“You know what to do, Y/N.” 
You close your eyes and take a deep breath – there’s only so much of this you can take. You focus on his cock teasing your folds for a few moments, and that’s all the encouragement you need.
“Please, Dean! Please, fuck me!”
“That’s better. Louder.”
“Jesus fucking – FUCK ME, NOW!”
You’re rewarded immediately, and he bottoms out inside you with ease. 
“Was that so hard?”
“Fuck me,” you reply through gritted teeth, “or I’m gonna go get Mr. McAnn to do it.”
That is both the very wrong and very right thing to say. 
You yelp as he yanks up harder on your hair, your chest leaving the counter. His hand moves to rest on your neck – not choking you, simply holding you in place – and then he pounds into you harder than he ever has before. 
“You are something else, you know that?” he hisses, his thrusts hard and fast. “I know you were only acting like a slut for Mr. Douchebag back there, but it just comes so – fucking – easy – to you, doesn’t it?” He punctuates his words with more thrusts. “And not wearin’ any underwear – that wasn’t for the act, hm? That was because you were hopin’ to end up like this, yeah?” His hand moves from your throat to grip underneath your jaw when you fail to answer. “ Yeah ?”
“Yeah – oh m-my God – fuck , D-Deaaan.”
He smirks, watching you in the mirror above the counter as you slowly come apart on his cock. “No, you don’t have to act like a slut for me, sweetheart. You just are one, hm?” 
You nod to the best of your ability. 
“Open your eyes, look at yourself,” he orders, his grip on your jaw tightening as his thrusts speed up. You do as you’re told, meeting your reflection in the mirror. You’re not sure if your mascara is smudged because of sweat or tears, your hair looks like a bird has made its home in it, and you can’t remember a time that you’ve looked this fucked out. “See what I mean?” Dean questions. “Sluttiest you’ve ever fuckin’ looked. Not that I’m complaining.” 
You feel the dam inside you about to break, and you let out a whimper in warning. 
“Oh, sweetheart,” he says, almost out of breath, his tone laced with pity. “Are you gonna cum?”
“Mm-hm,” you nod, whimpering again.
“You like being my slut that much, hm?”
“Dean, please,” you beg, squeezing your eyes shut, stalling your release as much as you can. You’re not sure why – it’s not like you have to wait for his permission – but you find yourself wanting it. 
“Christ, Y/N,” he breathes, quickly realizing what you’re asking for. His thrusts are becoming erratic, and you know he’s close too. “Hold it, baby. Can you do that?”
“I don’t –”
“Mmm, I think you can. I’m – fuck – I’m close. Be a good little slut and hold it. Want you – shit – want you to cum with me, sweetheart.”
You find yourself nodding, focusing on Dean’s pants in your ear instead of the precipice of your release, and a few seconds go by before expletives are falling from his lips and you know it’s safe for you to let go.
Your dam breaks. “Oh, God – fuck – Dean!”
“Fuuuuuck,” he moans, filling you up. He lets his forehead fall to your shoulder as he catches his breath, post-orgasmic shivers running through him as you ride out your high, your walls clenching around his cock. “Fuck, you feel so good,” he pants, lifting his head to press a kiss behind your ear. “Such a perfect fuckin’ slut.”
You manage a soft giggle as your body settles. “Only for you, babe.”
He chuckles, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder as he stares at your reflection in the mirror. 
“And don’t you forget it.”
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