#monkeyfic

[widowsresolve]

Anchor Points

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Rating: Teen

Summary:

For one glorious, gravity-defying moment, Clint felt like he was flying as he jumped from the swing. It made him feel like he could do anything. It made him feel fearless and untouchable. He needed more of that in his life. -- The journey of Clint's life from a boy wishing for a better life in Waverly, Iowa to the man who becomes an Avenger and the relationships that helped to make him who he is.

It's posting day for the fic I wasn't sure I was ever going to actually write until I saw about @clintbartoncelebrationbash and decided to just go for it! This is in many ways the backstory I wish we could've gotten from what little we got on screen and is shockingly canon compliant from me while being the divorce fic I've admittedly wanted to try my hand at for a while.

Also, I got to coordinate with ivvic on a beautiful art piece for this fic, go check that out with the story! :)

[vor-leser]

Benny now an animal, I knew AM would let him play.

(Stuff about my own version of pre-monkeyification Benny below the cut because i have too many thoughts on this)

It's kind of hard to make heads or tails of any of the ihnmaims characters since the cannons of the different adaptations contradict each other so much, so I reconciled my own version of events in my head as to what I think Benny was like pre monkeyfication. I tried to fit everything from the comic, game and book in though.

Benny was a very masculine guy, excelling in every sport, and despising everyone who did not live up to his standard of what it meant to be a strong man. All his life, he tried to embody this ideal, not only marrying and having two kids, but going on to join the military. When he became general, he was known amongst the soldiers as an authoritarian punitive leader, often abusing those below him to whip the weak ones into shape. His ideals were solidified under the pressure of the continuing third world war, instilling a kill or be killed mentality into him. Eventually, he came to the realization that he was gay. However, because this reality threatened to break apart the way he viewed the world and his masculinity. With the mounting pressures from a chain of losses and his own internal struggles, he reacted by overcompensating and becoming more brutal than ever, leading him to kill multiple of his own men. Returning from the Chinese American War, he developed a severe case of PTSD. Constantly making him feel as if his life was at stake, he found himself unable to show any weakness. He hid his own war crimes thoroughly, all the while continuing to receive accolades from his superiors for his tenure. He constantly felt the need to not only hide his crimes, but also his sexuality, making him paranoid that people would realize he was a fraud. This did not only put a strain on him, but also on his family.

AM specifically chose Benny, because he embodied the many ways in which humanity tore itself apart through war, constantly finding new methods to make their own existence miserable for an imagined ideal.

At first, Bennys presence among the survivors proved very useful. Out of all of them, he had the most experience in dangerous situations and a lot of physical strength. His wisdom and leadership helped them a great deal, eventually though, they would inevitably disappoint him. Falling into his old patterns of behavior, he would berate Nimdok the most for his obvious weakness, saying he was holding them back. With time, he did the same with Ellen, Ted and even Gorrister, which formed a rift between himself and all of them. He felt as if he could rely on no one but himself.

Still, his usefulness irked AM. He had gotten one over on him too many times, but this would make his coming defeat even more crushing. It started with his mental state. Paranoia had already slowly crept up on Benny, but when he was forced to relive his trauma, it spiraled out of control. Being starved, beaten and defeated, he started to lose his humanity. His egoism, distrust and brutality, all born out a desire for survival made him a nightmare for the others. AM found it amusing, how he had turned Benny into a parody of humanity and its worst aspects, seeing it fit to strip him of his last remaining bits of humaneness, breaking his body into the shape of an ape-thing.

His spirits were now completely broken, being reduced to a bumbling fool. Even though his shame mellowed him out, there were still occasional outbursts. Now ironically enough, he had become the survivors greatest liability. Luckily for him, the others pity him and keep him around, a kindness he likely wouldn't have awarded them.

(Also drawing a guy thats canonically supposed to look handsome while making him resemble a monkey is hard :,) )

[c0ffeeb1ack]

kind of interesting how we never really see the events of the hargreeves' "missions" as kids other than that first episode, but we do see the aftermath of them with both luther's unconsensual monkeyfication and ben being dead. someone better at media analysis pick this up please 🙏

[surlifen]

freak monkeyfication for karp!

[cleanfishdish]

Annual monkeyfication of sillies that are in my brain

[trailerparkk]

Saru Getchu ~On Air~ - Episode 14 (Specter Goes Too Far)

Suggested by @monkeyfables

[zontiky]

AU where Ben doesn’t die (and you can’t just say he saves the world with his logic!! You gotta get IN DETAIL)

has it been literal months and should i have done this way earlier, yes and yes 

I HATE YOU FOR MAKING ME THINK THOUGHTS BREE

(come on brain, think of things, come on brain, think of things, come on brain, be so smart-) ahem yes anyway

do i have to explain how ben didnt die? no but im gonna

so if we’re going off the fun (/s) theory of “the horror goes berserk and kills ben” or any other takes on “death by tentacle monster” then i propose:

my dear boy bennethy benjamin benson the sixth only rips himself up a little bit

like just a little

OR he dies but he gets better so its okay

anyway ben does not die and fast forward to their thirties

bree you’re not my MOM you’re not allowed to tell me how much i can have ben just be SMART so their family ISN’T falling apart because ben is THERE being the BRAINCELL and lending out WITS yes yes good

luther is not on the moon, because ben didn’t die so he didn’t feel guilty enough to stay, and when reggie sent him on the mission ben was like “...bro we should get coffee. lets skip out on saving this radioactive material and like. go sip some starbucks”

i never said ben was smart 

hes logical but are any of them truly smart

“yes,” says the liar. “no,” says t.he wise old man on the top of the hill. “actually yes but they’re all dumbasses,” says me

ok ok so but 

because ben is alive, this is the shit that does go down:

luther doesnt go to the moon, and he deserves good things so?? no monkeyfication?? blease

diego doesnt give up on being a police officer (klaus voice: hah bootlicker) and doesnt have a bad breakup with eudora, ben is cool like bens tend to be and just psychoanalyses their relationship so they work through their problems, like ADULTS

allison still lowkey screws up her marriage but like a little less? they still divorce but on less bad terms, and she and claire can visit and claire stays with allie on weekends or something

klaus

klaus does not turn to homelessness and whatever the hell klaus has been doing

why, you ask? because this time around be is perfectly physical and can and has punched him 

then five is gone

and ben is a writer maybe because idk i think that’d be neat ok like please let him vent his feeling while making money sakjfsh that a joke but hes valid

vanya!! doesnt write the goddamn book!! fuck!!! 

basically theyre like,,,, omg,,, an actual family woahhhhh

so then reggie dies right and theyre like “eh might as well go, maybe they’ll have scones”

and five comes back and everyone is like :0

ok ok ok so five didnt know anyone was alive bc there was no book right????? so like hes going into this blind 

basically,,,, ben is the family glue,,,, he has the braincells,,,,, he keeps them together,,,, is this good enough bree is this valid

FINE ill keep going smh tho

so at the theater (yes im skipping to vanya somehow losing is (idk how tho) and now shes twv-ing at the theater. unhinged rep, i love her) and ben is like 

“i have not used the horror since i left home. coolio klaus hold my beer”

he doesnt drink tho bc im assuming that fucks with the wigglies

and ben wrecks stuff but,,, carefully,,,

murders some temps guys

when vanya laserbeams the ceiling and the moon falls

this is where i get cool and overpower ben

ben just lets hordes of tentacles like

*whoosing noises*

the HOLD UP THE MOON BECAUSE BEN IS A PUNKASS BITCH AND I LOVE HIM

THEN STRAIGHT UP YEET THE ROCK BACK INTO SPACE

PROBABLY CRASH DOWN A SATELLITE WHICH,,, WHOOPS

BUT YEAH THATS HOW BEN BENNETHY BENITO BENJAMIN BENSON BENNERLY BENTHONY HARGREEVES 

SA VE D THE WO RLD 

the end 

askdjhskf IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED BREE??? @ur-a-lizard-hairy IS THIS GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU????

[mr-haitch-but-lewd]

I have a few requests. Could we see more Big Hero 6 monkeyfication?

I actually did have a sketch for a follow up from ages ago, I just, I dunno got a little burned out by it and I had already drawn TFs of my favourite characters? If people want to see this done I would though.

[markoftheasphodel]

Financial advisor for the multi-million training fund on which I sit circa first quarter 2017: “The markets are EXCITED about all the OPPORTUNITIES presented by PRESIDENT TRUMP!!!”

Financial advisor for same, first quarter 2019: “So, we recommend you transfer outta the emerging markets funds into something low-risk and eliminate the hedge fund that lost 13.7% last quarter...”

Who’s excited now, you monkeyf*cks?

[widowsresolve]

Now live: Chapter 54!

Their first stop in Miami had been food and coffee, staking out the Roxxon building coming second. It took a little longer than an hour and a half after their arrival at a suitable observation point for the parking lot to clear of a majority of the employees and another forty-five minutes for an apparent security shift change. “Would’ve been nice if the smoker was sticking around,” Clint quietly mused as he set down his binoculars to stretch his arms. Natasha only responded with a hum of agreement before she gestured to draw his attention towards the right side of the building from their position. “Light’s still flickering at least.”

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[91625]

ratfic: rationalist fiction.

catfic: catholic fiction.

monkeyfic: irrationalist fiction.

dogfic: protestant fiction?

birdfic: the whole Aristophanes-Pratchett thing, I guess?

[c0ffeeb1ack]

HEY

not sure how I feel about gratuitous pre-monkeyfication luther abs shot

[fujimilovers]

its because hes a monkey i cant stress this enough i love monkeys i saw him pre monkeyfication and i was like this is just some guy who cares but hes a monkey now so im obsessed i love monkeys so much sorry its 5 am

[widowsresolve]

Chapter 52!

“Hey,” Clint lightheartedly warned as Natasha reached across him to snag a cherry tomato. “Those aren’t for munching tonight.” She smirked at him in unapologetic challenge and coyly said, “I don’t see you stopping me.” “You get one freebie.” Without breaking eye contact, Natasha popped the tomato into her mouth and started to reach for another only for Clint to gently grab her wrist. “Not a snack bar.”

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[tehmoonofficial]

i’m Thinking about this:

-no power swap, vanya is just 6 for Secret Reasons

-five (now One) and ben constantly bickering because five relies on his powers for everything and ben despises his

-vanya died instead of ben

-allison is the chill junkie and klaus is the celebrity with tons of scandal

-diego is 5 which gives him even more motivation to climb to the top, and also explains why he isn’t easily recognized in public

-five still went to the apocalypse and one is the loneliest number would SLAP there

-luther still went to the moon to please Reginald but didn’t go through a monkeyfication so he is 100% himbo

-allison went to war instead of klaus and had this whole sapphic yearning situation

-klaus has his kid from tua: dallas in a similar way to how allison has claire. people love his fame because it probably originated with Prime-8’s and so in this au he joined Diego and Vanya in that band, and then interviewers would ask what his power is and he goes “oh, i see dead people.” and all the emos lose their minds

-luther plays piano at a recital a week after their dad mysteriously kicked it, the commission invades and klaus makes vanya corporeal. corporeal vanya takes over the piano and KICKS ASS, then causes the beam of light to hit the moon and ohhh fuck, well, One is yelling at everyone that they need to timetravel and they guess they should follow his orders

today’s nonsense: the umbrella academy siblings as what number Vibes they provide

1- Independent, small digit, a bit of an asshole but you allow them anyway because they’re essential: Five

2- False confidence, caring, peaceful as a facade but violent when they have to be in secret, outstanding former emo vibes: Ben

3- Oddball, loves to collect quirky things like a crow, aesthetic is sort of tacky eccentric, can pretend to be esteemed to get their way: Klaus

4- COOLEST ONE AROUND, hilarious af, friendship is the Most important thing to them, probably had an unhealthy obsession with a specific animal like a cat or horse when they were younger: Allison

5- Bastard but soft as fuck, supportive and predictable while pretending to be chaotic, tries to be edgy but everyone is grateful for their existence: Diego

6- Super political, strong sense of morality that keeps them going, musical, soft, has a Specific Color vibe they stick to (my synthesia says orange-yellow for the number but a smooth purple-blue for the word): Vanya

7- Most likely to have a job and car, just yearns for a nuclear family to belong in, kind of wild but doesn’t realize it, could kill a bitch with their temper but doesn’t want to: Luther

[widowsresolve]

Chapter 53!

Clint waited for the elevator doors to close and provide relative privacy before he angled towards Natasha and wryly asked, “Am I on track to guess the plan is to infiltrate the closest Roxxon building for a lead on that footage?” She reached past him to press the button for his floor before hers. “Their HQ is in Chelsea, I figure even starting blind we can be in and out within a few hours.” He nodded. “You thinking of risking a direct entrance?” “I think we need to.” Before Clint could respond she added, “I’ll get a veil programmed for you, meet in twenty downstairs? Business cover.”

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