#my gifs look bad wht's new

[submissiveness]

“i taught him everything he knows.”

[tarotmundomonde]

Hey again❤ This is my second request for the new game(U have allowed two requests for this game) Please make this ask private too. Thank you.

My Option: Love reading aka. romance for the next 5 months for singles (This is option 2 and I chose option 5 in the previous ask)

Why you should do this reading/why I chose this: Honestly, I am currently single and have been single for years (by choice and also by my other reasons and current situation) so I m curious to see if things will change as I have never expected within the next 5 months in terms of love because you never knw. Things can always change but we never know how or when it will play out. I wouldn't be surprised either if the next 5 months will still be the same but I m ready for any new opportunities that would change my love life. Tbh, I m a bit cynical and careful rn when it comes to love since I m so used to being single and also bc of my past experiences but as I have mentioned, I am ready to see some changes.

Initial & sun sign: A & ♊

Venus sign: ♉ Moon sign: ♑

Romantic gif tht resonates with me(spicy gif for mine this time lol)

Romantic gif I think would resonate with u:

Color for you: This time, I choose black since u gives off introverted, deep and philosophical vibes.

Anything I'd like to add or say: Just like how I mentioned before, honesty is key for me so u can tell me anything bad or good tht comes up. Or even any warnings I should look out for within the next 5 months. Interpretation along with the meaning of cards is important and do not worry abt word limit. And my public asks keep disappearing so I hope u won't mind abt me asking u to make this ask private. Oh and if u end up doing this reading, pls mention which month u did this so tht I can knw wht the next 5 months are. That's all I guess. Have a nice day/night ahead❤

NOTE: This reading counts from today to the next 5 months.

Hello A, let's dive into your reading, shall we?

At first glance, it looks like you are being a master at sweeping things under the rug, but the cards are showing that the problems won't go away. The loneliness, the isolation, the lack will grow louder, there is some work you need to do. Healing work. It's like you are pushed to do some healing work, before love is even an option for you. You said you are single by choice, but the cards say you don't have a choice. No one else will do your work and whatever you need to work on won't go away. You'll just have to face it head on. The good news is the control and power is all in your hands. The cards are showing you could easily do the work and properly heal. Basically you have some cleansing to do but it would come easy to you, if you just did it. What looks like too much and too difficult is actually much easier than you'd think. It's just many little details, small problems that piled up, but therefore it is easy to also work on them. All you need to do is open your eyes and see you have all you need to take back control and get the work done. You simply need to bring the scales back into balance and your dreams of love will come true. Let's go deeper into the details of your reading.

There is clarity present, meaning things are very clear. It's simply a matter of understanding. You have clarity but you seem to refuse to understand, a bit of a stubborn energy can be felt from your reading. However, you are in front of a bridge and crossing that bridge will lead you to love. But no one will carry you over that bridge, no. You have to take every step yourself, to work those muscles in order to cross the bridge. So you have clarity and now understanding. Now, if for some reason you claim not to have such clear clarity over your situation, fret not, the cards have spoken. It all begins from what you need to release. Looking at the cards, you are given time for healing. It's simply that this task will not go away, before you do your job. So you can keep your eyes closed and keep on sleeping on it for as long as you want, but the only thing you'll do is prolong everything and make it tougher on yourself. Whereas the sooner you open your eyes and start doing your work, the sooner you'll make and see progress. So use the next five months well to heal.

Some of the themes are regarding fears you have about love. It seems it has to do with failure. Having difficulty to face things as they are. Fear of change, fear of not having full control over the person and the connection. The pressure coming from the outside, be it peer pressure, society, family. Something about family. A sense of fear of whether you'd be accepted. Possibly lacking self-confidence. You seem to need to work on your self-confidence, on being your authentic self. You are called to find your inner strengths and powers. Your inner power is calling on you, it wants you to reclaim it. Then the matter of reaching out. If you like someone, you might struggle with greeting the other person or talking to them, because fearing failure and rejection. It could be also the other way around, you don't trust someone would truly like you so much that they wouldn't miss an opportunity to reach out to you, to communicate with you. You don't trust someone making the first move on you or more actively showing you their interest in you in love. But instead of fearing, it seems you should rather start tapping more into that creative desire, inspiration and enthusiasm. If someone likes you, they would definitely be enthusiastic about you and would definitely desire you and let it show. You see, love inspires. So if you wish for love, why not be inspired by it to do your part in healing, so you can get closer to your wish come true? Because the cards are saying that dreams come true in love. And as you heal, you will be shown signs of it, possibly in the form of some smaller wishes coming true.

You are currently on a soul mission and this phase you are going through is just a ripple of it. This is a part of something bigger, something that leads you towards love. And one more thing that came through for you is that love is not about conditioning, it's not really something that can be defined by numbers and such. Love is simply love. It seems you need to learn to understand that love is simple. It's simply about two people having a connection and naturally sharing that love with each other.

ps. feedback is always appreciated~

[showbonyan]

rant about school and like friendship and how my past friend trauma still hurts or whatever nothing bad but 🤷‍♀️:

went to my last class i haven’t had yet today and it was kinda 😬 because an ex (??) friend is in tht class and i promised to not talk to him because of communication issues etc etc etc but then i met somebody new today and i began to plan out my usual aquaintanceship scheme to avoid being alone because loneliness makes me feel SICK and EUGH the ptsd pain

but then as i was leaving i noticed she was being slow and went 🤔 and she stopped walking as she went out the door when she saw i was holding the door for somebody else and i was 🤔 and then she started to walk With me and i was like 🤯 and we did tht thing where u go “oh i have to go now” but you stand outside in the cold and talk for like another 20 mins like when ur mom says ur leaving in 5 minutes but she means 30

and i’m like for real shaken up at the thought tht she just fucking did tht like i’m usually the instigator when it comes to forming relationships and she tripped me and i’m fine with that

the mere idea of somebody PURPOSEFULLY... making the move to talk to me without me trying to butt my way in or plan out my every move i’m still loosing it this is longing for companionship

maybe when i get my free dining dollars in like 2 weeks i can ask if i could eat dinner with her and her roommate who knows i’m excited i want friendship but i still gotta be careful and cautious 😤😤😤😤

overall i’m like

[byeongqueen]

I have arrived once again judhdh

First of all how are you???

And my request for today is "oneus as strippers" but like when you are their new client ya know??

I'm good, I hope you are too ! Honestly, this request made me smile, and I had a really fun time writing it, so thank you for that !

To be clear, all of the boys are strippers because they chose to, they are not forced in any way.

Genre: maybe suggestive, but no smut involved

Seoho: The boy has the soul of a diva. He'll lock eyes with you, batting his eyelash, and if you have a private session with him, be prepared to be called 'honey' everytime he opens his mouth.

He'll propably softly hum, or sing along to the tune that is playing suring his performance

Hwanwoong: The boy is attractive, and he can move like no one can, and he perfectly knows that. He knows how to roll his body to make women, and even men go absolutely batshit crazy for him. He know how to use his body, but also his face, and facial expressions (I mean, have you seen how he does on stage ?)

Leedo: Ah, I have trouble imagining him being a stripper, I don't know why. To me, he's more like the friend that helps, and intervenes if shit go down, or if someone is too touchy with one of his friends.

If I were to imagine him doing it though, he'll probably rely a lot on his muscles, and his voice.

Youngjo: His gaze, oh my god, his motherfucking gaze. The man uses his eyes to just melt the heart of everything. A flying kiss, a bit of lip biting, and everyone's at his feet. Another that knows he's pretty.

If the person he gives the show to is his type, he could ask for their numer afterwards, to have some more private fun, or even a full on date.

Keonhee: A bit shy maybe, kind of clumsy, but not in a bad way ? More in like a 'i wanna be perfect but I'm still a bit awkward way'. Might take some time for him to be completely at ease with the job, but once he does, he gives his best. He's a sucker for the praise that he can receive by his clients, and that's wht pushes him to give his all during work nights.

Dongju: Not as shy as he looks like. We all know the boys is a bit of a brat. He'll come real close to his client, almost touching their skin, before pulling back with a small smile, knowing perfectly well that the clients aren't allowed to touch the strippers. His favorite game is to play with that rule.

[neraidaastrid]

Burden

Niklaus mikaelson x reader

Word count: 1464

Prompt: You find out you’re a werewolf when you trigger your curse and hide it from klaus not wanting to burden him, but he finds out from aurora and goes to help you

A/N: this was inspired by @imaginethevampirediaries what happened

2 years with klaus and you loved him dearly. He loved you too and you knew that, but sometimes you couldn’t help but feel like a burden as you were a weak human and well he was the big bad hybrid who had to come to your rescue every time someone went after you. Perks of being his girlfriend was the massive target that was instantly put on your back.

Steps could be heard from down the hall, slowly becoming louder and more easily heard. You grew confused as no one was meant to be home as the mikaelsons’ had to take care of some business outside of the compound. You didn’t want to ask about what they were doing as it wasn’t hard to guess that heads were gonna be rolling. Curious, you rise from yours and klaus’ bed to walk towards the bedroom door. A wooden stake catches the corner of your eye. Swiftly, you grab hold of the stake clenching it behind your back. The door swung open with a strong wind showing a woman at the door. The petite figure had long red hair and wasn’t very tall but still taller than you. “Can i help you?” You say trembling, “you can actually, I’m just going to need you to come with me.” She said smirking at you with anger in her eyes. Without warning, two men grabbed onto your arms pushing you forward to get you out of the room. With all the strength in your body, you grab the stake and pierce the vampire to your left’s heart before doing the same to the one on your right.

A stinging ache appears in the lower half of your abdomen. You clutch hold of your stomach in pain. A growl escapes your lips as you look up at the astounded redhead as she watches your eyes glow gold. The vampire sped out as soon as she saw your irises turn amber, leaving you alone in yours and klaus’ room. The pain fades as you regain your composure. Millions of thoughts encase your mind, “how could this have happened?” You thought, raising your hands to your head in confusion. One thought came to you, how were you meant to tell klaus you were a wolf when you didn’t even know? You couldn’t, you couldn’t burden him with your problems, he already has enough to deal with without your new discovery.

Panic was starting to set in as your realised you will have to turn tomorrow. Right now all you had to do was pretend nothing happened and act normal around klaus. First job was to get rid of the dead vampires. So you did, it was hard but you ended up carrying both of the bodies to the back garden and set them on fire before anyone got home.

(2 hours later)

“Y/N!!!!” Klaus called from the courtyard. “In here!” You yell back to let him know where you are. Within a second the door was open and he stood there admiring you with your nose in your book. You didn’t even need to see at him to know he was staring you down, “Did no one ever tell you it’s rude to stare?” You question, finally looking up to him leaning against a wall with his arms crossed over his chest observing you in awe. “I can’t not stare at your beauty.” He cooed, speeding over to you pinning you against the bed on the top of your body. A giggle slips from your lips at his movements, causing him to smirk at you, “i don’t think I’ll ever get enough of that laugh of yours,”he grinned, smashing his lips on yours. You lean into his touch feeling his smirk through the kiss. This man is the love of your life and you’ll never get enough of him.

(The next day)

Waking up to the sound of klaus’ heartbeat and his breathing was peaceful. You feel his eyes hovering over you as you lay tranquilly on his chest just above his heart. Even though this calming environment, the panic from you triggering your curse is eating you up. The thoughts wont leave you be, they are screaming at you. Tonight was your first full moon and you were freaking out like crazy but had to keep your cool around klaus.

“What are you thinking about?” Klaus asks curious about what has you so infatuated. “Nothing.” You splutter quickly, a smile escapes your lips to reassure him that you were ok. “Ok. Come one, lets go get breakfast.” He says getting off the bed and dragging you by the hand.

(That evening)

All day you were worried, you had been in the supernatural world long enough to know that turning was a painful process, let alone the first time. You were anxious, terrified for wht was to come. Klaus had left that evening to go and sort out the situation with his crazy ex, Aurora, so that left you to go out an turn.

You chose a forest just outside of the city. The spot you chose was a clearing in the woods so you could see the moon clearly. As you stood in the moonlight, you could feel the breeze, hear the rustling of the trees, smell the cold air. This calmed you, but not enough as your worries grew by the moment as the moon was rising.

(Klaus’ pov)

You hated leaving Y/N but this maniac needed to be sorted out, so here you were. “Aurora!!! You crazy wench!!!” You scream, wondering around her mansion. “Nik, as much a i love to see you, i do find it quite perculiar as to why you are not with your.... girlfriend.. at this very moment.” Aurora said with curiosity in her voice. “What do you mean?” You ask, unsure to what she was implying. “It’s a full moon, and she just triggered her curse killing my vampires yesterday, didn’t she tell you? Oh..... she didn’t did she?” The redhead said, smirking and enjoying this too much. As soon as those words slipped from her your face dropped as realisation dunked in. That’s why she had been off recently, she triggered her curse, but why didn’t she tell you she had the werewolf gene, and why didn’t she tell you that she triggered it? You forgot why you came here in the first place and exited the house as soon as you could, you needed to be with Y/N.

(Reader’s pov)

A throbbing pain shot up your leg as it broke sending you screeching. The transition was starting. You fall to the floor unable to stand as your legs were snapping. SNAP. Your wrist twisted. CRACK. Your screams could be heard from the edge of the forest where klaus was standing. He sped towards you as fast as he could. The sight broke his heart, you crying out from pain. He kneeled in front of you on the floor catching your attention. You look at him with tears in your eyes, heavily breathing. “I’m here. You’re going to be alright. You can do this. I believe in you.” He repeated these words over and over while you howled and yelled. You couldn’t focus, it hurt too much to try and decipher what klaus was saying. Everything was blurred, all you could see were your tears. All you could hear were bones fracturing and your cries and pleads for it to all be over.

Then it all stops, the pain ends and you are now a wolf. Klaus smiles as he sees your wolf form, your platinum white fur and amber eyes. “Run free my love.” He whispers watching you turn around and rush into the darkness of the forest.

(Morning)

A soft breeze rushes over you waking you up from your slumber. Sitting up you let the the memories from last night sink into your mind. You let out a loud groan from the aching of your body. A small laugh could be heard from behind you so you whip your head around to see klaus making his way towards you with clothes in his arms. That’s when you realise that you dont have at clothes on. “As much as i would love to watch you sleep naked, you need to rest in an actual bed and i would like to hear why you kept this from me.” Klaus said, he wasn’t angry just a bit sad and confused. He threw you your clothes and you slid them on before standing up. Your legs turned to jelly dropping you to the floor. Just before hitting the floor, klaus scoops you up into his arms and you wrap your arms around his neck. “I’ve got you love, lets go home.” He breathed.

[mvssmallow]

Cloudy With A Chance

Part 11: …of Apple Pi.

Masterlist

Maybe in a movie Jiwon would’ve kissed Hanbin as they walked along the Han River after the Exhibition. Maybe they would’ve linked hands nervously and heard 90s RnB music playing faintly in the distance as a light breeze ruffles through Hanbin’s hair.

But none of that actually happens. Out of the corner of his eye, Jiwon saw the moment come….then he watched it go, floating away with an apologetic shrug.

He’s okay with it. They’re hungry, tired and uncomfortable in their clothes so instead of being in a movie they sit under the bridge in untucked shirts and rolled up sleeves, passing plates of food and bubble tea between them, talking easily about rap songs, tattoo plans and how to deal with the fact that Donghyuk politely threatened him at the gallery (answer: when the time comes, move to Mexico if grovelling and bribery don’t work.)

There were too many people around for them to do anything else but even when they were alone, nothing happened. Even when he gets caught staring at Hanbin’s mouth as it sucks on the straw. Even with the dim light offering some cover. Even then, with the opportunity flashing at him in neon lights, nothing happened. He just took an extra big mouthful of chocolate waffle as Hanbin smiled around his straw.

But it’s okay. It’s okay, he tells himself. It will happen when it happens.

He tries not to be too disappointed when they don’t kiss goodnight either. Instead, he watches Hanbin stumble out the car, dragging his black blazer haphazardly behind him and yawning repeatedly.

“Thanks for tonight. It was good.” Hanbin says through the car window. “Maybe the next time we hang out there will be less people around though?”

“With less interrogations and threats?” He adds.

“Yeah.”

“Next time it’ll just be me and you.”

“Okay.” Hanbin yawns as he leans heavily against the passenger window. “I better go, otherwise I’ll just sleep in your car.”

Jiwon honestly wouldn’t even mind but he knows it’s probably a bit too early for that sort of thing.

“Go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

Hanbin nods and rubs his eyes. It’s a move that makes him look much younger than his 25 years and Jiwon gets the urge to hug him to his chest. The fiery Hanbin is all smart words and sharp teeth that sink into his skin without mercy but the tired, sad and vulnerable Hanbin is something that scares him, not because he can’t handle it (he knows he can) but because it reaches down into his core and drags all of his protective instincts to the surface. He’d probably follow Hanbin straight into Hell if he asked him to and run twice as fast if he didn’t.

“Okay. Well, Goodnight. Thanks for the ride. Drive safely.”

“Night. Sleep well.”

Hanbin waves as he walks towards his apartment, turning back after a few steps to yell out, “Hey, text me when you get home! So I know.”

So I know.

Jiwon wonders what that means exactly. He wonders about it all the way home, right up to the moment when he gets to his door and lets his keys hang in the lock so he can type out a text.

[im home. Didn’t die. Sorry if I woke you. xxj]

He drags himself through a quick shower and throws on some clean boxers before collapsing face down onto his bed. He’s just about to drift off when he hears the muted buzz of his phone next to him.

[good. It’s too much work finding a replacement.]

[im irreplcble. thats hard to spell]

[why don’t you use auto carrot]

[whts that? Spellcheck 4 bunnies?]

[you’d know…. bunny]

[whatever you say princess]

[if you call me that i’m breaking up with you]

[but youre not allowed to]

[I’m falling asleep. Sorry. Text me when you wake up.]

[go sleep. Night. xxj]

[night bunny xxh]

It doesn’t take long to fall asleep after that, not when dreamworld beckons him in with images of dimple smiles, undercuts and rabbits.

He’s still tired when his alarm goes off at 9am but the physical lethargy is offset by the kind of mental optimism that you can only get when your life is on the right track. He stretches out underneath his warm sheets, smiling at the ceiling and watching the sun filter through the gaps in his curtains. His hand smooths over the empty space next to him and he wonders what it might be like if it wasn’t so empty one day.

Somewhere on the other side of Seoul, probably still asleep, is chaos, art and random useless facts all rolled up into a riddle wrapped enigma. But he loves chaos and he loves that that is what he belongs to now. The revelation echoes in his head, the repetition doing nothing to diminish the thrill that he gets every time he thinks about Hanbin. He buries his head into his pillow and groans loudly. When did he get this lame and embarrassing? He would never hear the end of it if June knew the truth.

He should really get up and hit the gym to sweat all this out. But not before he digs around the sheets to find his phone.

[good morning. Guess wat? Didn’t die in the night. Sorry if I woke you xxj]

His cinnamon toast cereal tastes extra sweet this morning as he watches the news and tries to catch the weather report as it scrolls across the bottom of the screen. Outside his door he can hear his apartment block waking up and coming to life, there’s already music playing, a dog barking and a child’s high pitched giggle. Has it always been this idyllic? Maybe he was imagining it. Or maybe this is what life through Rose Tinted sunglasses feels like: one long movie with a happy ending.

He’s pulling on his gym shorts when his phone buzzes with a message alert.

[hey bunny.glad you’re alive. its too early, i’m going back to sleep]

[wait are you free 2moro? I’m going to get roses for rp, want to come?]

[sure ok good night xxh]

[lol okay, btw it’s Sunny today wth the chance of a late cold front. Call me if you get bored. xxj]

It’s 11:30 and he’s just walking out the gym doors when he gets another message.

[there are like 30 different types of cereal in this new store.]

He turns on the handsfree function in his car and dials Hanbin’s number as he pulls out of the car park.

“Are you calling me? Why are you calling me? I’m buying food.” Hanbin says, as if he was completely surprised by the turn of events. “Why is it so noisy?”

“Sorry, I’m driving.”

“Going somewhere? Also: hi.”

“Hey.” It never fails to make him smile, how off kilter conversations with Hanbin can be. “Yeah I just left the gym, going to Yoyo and June’s place now because they’ve got some sort  of car emergency.”

“Oh okay. I’ve got dinner with my parents tonight. I don’t know if I should bring some alcohol or a lot of alcohol.” Hanbin says glumly. “Actually, I don’t think there’s enough alcohol in the world for this.”

“That bad huh?”

He laughs lightly, mainly to be polite, but he really has no idea how they’re going to deal with the parent issue when the time comes. They will probably survive dinner with his parents but he has no idea what they’re going to do about Hanbin’s parents. In the back of his mind, he knows it’s unfair to paint them in a negative light before they’ve even met but at the same time, he’s learnt to never ignore his gut instincts and his gut tells him that it’s going to be difficult at best or a complete disaster.

Hanbin groans on the other end. “They’re going to get on my case about why I’m still apparently a sad single hermit. Maybe pass a few phone numbers my way because they think they’re being helpful.”

“They sound like my parents.”

“Maybe I should just tell them.” Hanbin says quietly but it comes across loud and clear and trips the alarm in his head.

“Hang on a sec.” He quickly finds a spot on a side street to pull over and park. “What do you want to tell them?”

“That I’m not single anymore. It’d be nice to tell them one less lie.” There’s a sad chuckle at the end of it that just makes him want to reach through the phone connection to hug Hanbin tightly.

“Oh. Okay, if you’re sure.” He replies, relieved. “I kinda thought you wanted tell them everything. About you and…me.”

There’s a sharp cackle on the other line, like the idea was beyond comprehension. “I’m feeling brave Jiwon, not suicidal. I don’t know what to do about that at all right now but maybe I can just get them off my back about girlfriends for awhile.”

“Aren’t they gonna want to meet her?”

“Yeah probably.”

“But she doesn’t exist.”

There’s rustling on Hanbin’s end. “Should I get Honey Nut Crunch or Froot Loops?”

The conversational whiplash disorientates him briefly before he catches up with Hanbin’s train of though.

“Froot Loops? No, don’t get that. Froot Loops are so unhealthy. It’s all sugar. Get cinnamon toast cereal. The gluten and sugar free version. That’s the one I have.”

He can practically hear Hanbin’s grimace. “Is it also taste free?”

“No!” He laughs. “It’s really good. I mean, you’re not eating wholemeal bran but at least you’re trying.”

“Well….okay.” Hanbin replies, entirely unconvinced.

“I’ll come over and eat the rest if you hate it.”

“Win-Win situation for you there.” Hanbin says flatly. “Look at how that turned out.”

“Yeah, amazing.” He smiles to himself before his mind returns to what they were talking about before. “So hey, are you really sure you want to just tell your parents? Won’t it create like 10 more problems for you?”

Okay, so he’s selfish. He was looking forward to spending some stress-free time with Hanbin now that everything had settled down. The thought of going through the complicated aspects of their relationship all over again just makes him want to go back to sleep.

“You think I should wait?”

“It’s up to you, Hanbin. If you feel like you want to tell them, then that’s what you should do.” He says, trying to be supportive despite his inner monologue.

“But?”

“But what?”

“You want to say something about it. I can tell.”

“No….it’s your decision.” He says carefully.

There’s a loud sigh. “Jiwon. Just tell me. I’m asking.”

He takes a breath. “Well, I was just thinking that it’s not always a good idea to tell them things like that without having some kind of plan. I mean, at least have a back up girl to help bail you out if they want to meet her last minute. That’s what parents like to do, spring these surprise attacks. It happened to me and look where I am now- still going on pointless church dates.”

There’s a sigh and pause as Hanbin thinks about his words. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I haven’t thought it through properly.”

He exhales slowly in relief. “Yeah, there will be other chances to tell them.”

“You know this means I’ll probably have to go on some fake dates then? Like you did?”

“It’s okay. Just be really boring. She’ll probably never call you again.”

“Is that what you do?”

“Sometimes. I usually just play the friendzone and drop in a few really polarising things. Like wanting 7 kids and moving to an apple orchard. There’s been approximately zero second dates after that.” He says with a laugh.

“Really? That sounds kinda nice though. Well, maybe not seven kids. Maybe four.”

He freezes mid laugh. Hanbin’s earnest consideration of his ridiculous date tactics takes him by surprise.

“I was joking Hanbin.”

“No you weren’t. 50% of all jokes are true.”

There’s no one around but he blushes anyway. “That sounds like something you just made up.”

“It’s legit I swear! I read it somewhere. I bet you really do want to have a bunch of kids on a farm. Right?”

“Maybe.” He says noncommittally.

There’s laughter on the other end. “Knew it. You live in the 1950s but it’s a cute dream to have. I’ll remember to drop something like that on my fake date.”

“Wait a second. You said four kids. You want to have four kids?”

“Yeah. Maybe? One day.”

“Oh. Cool.”

It’s then that his mind does that annoying thing where it takes an idea and fills his head with all sorts of futurescape images. What would Hanbin’s kids look like? What would his kids look like? Does Hanbin think his kids will be their kids? How can he get out of this conversation?

It gives him a headache thinking too far into the future. He never used to think about the details but lately, he catches himself staring at couples with small children and dreaming of scenarios which weren’t so impossible. He’s optimistic but he’s also realistic, there’s a line in the sky and having biological kids was so far beyond the line that it was in the realms of impossible fiction.

“Hey? You still there?”

“Yeah Yeah. I’m still here.”

“I better go. I need to get the shopping done before I go pick up my sister from dance class.”

He breathes out another sigh of relief. He loves talking to Hanbin but there are times when serious topics just sneak up on them and it gets too much, even over the phone.

“Yeah I need to go too. Text me later, about your dinner?”

“Yeah I will.”

“And I guess I’ll come over at like 10 tomorrow? If you still want to come to June’s?”

“Yeah, I’ll be ready.”

“Cool. Okay.” There’s an awkward pause because he’s never been good at saying goodbye. No matter how overwhelming their conversations gets, when the time comes there’s always a part of him that’s reluctant to let go, even if it’s only temporary. “Well umm…”

“Say bye, you loser.” Hanbin laughs on the other end.

“Okay! Fine. BYE.”

“Bye bunny. See you tomorrow.”

“Okay, bye.”

“And now you hang up.”

“Okay.” His finger hovers over the End-Call button but he can’t make himself push it.

“You’re still there.”

“Yup.”

“Okay well, there’s an old lady giving me death glares at the checkout so I really have to go. Bye bunny!”

Hanbin hangs up first. It’s how he prefers their calls to go because there’s something so difficult about hanging up on Hanbin. Or dropping him off and watching him walk away. Or being awake and knowing he’s still sleeping. He tells himself that he’ll be completely fine watching Hanbin go on fake dates but he knows it won’t be that simple when it happens.

Shaking his head, he starts the car to rejoin the flow of traffic.

The sun is setting by the times he gets home from fixing Yoyo’s car and has a second shower to wash off all the sweat and grease. He’s on the couch watching Iron Chef when the phone buzzes on the coffee table.

[pls save me]

[what happened? want me to come get you?]

[i said SAVE ME. not GET ME KILLED]

[how drunk are you]

[not drunk at all]

[tragedy, sorry for your loss]

[i miss you]

The message surprises him with its suddenness. He knows Hanbin can be unpredictable but he’s always taken aback by just how much it knocks him off his feet.

[i miss you too. U ok? Bc i can really come and get you]

[yeah I’m fine. Hanbyul’s distracting them with her ballet trophy.]

[she won something?]

[they give them out to every kid]

[lolz don’t be rude]

[I’m not! It’s the truth. Ahhhh I gotta go. xxh]

[ok call me later. xxj]

It’s midnight and he’s in bed watching the late 24-hour news when his phone lights up next to him.

[are you still up?]

He can’t think of a decent short reply so dials Hanbin’s number instead.

“It was horrible.” Hanbin says as soon as he picks up.

“Wanna tell me all about it?”

“They were on my back for twenty minutes about being a weird recluse and well, long story short, they gave my number to my dad’s business partner’s daughter. So I’m basically fucked, no matter how it ends.”

“Oh…..Shit.”

“Yeah.” Hanbin agrees miserably.

“Well….” He starts, trying to be positive but trailing off when he can’t think of anything to say. Hanbin, on the other hand, has plenty to say.

“It’s so bad. I just know it. If she hates me, she’ll tell her parents. Then they’ll tell my parents. And it might be weird at their company. That will get my dad pissed at me. Again. Even though I don’t even like girls and told them all night that I was too busy to have a relationship! Why do I have to deal with this stupid fucking situation Jiwon? On my list of stupid fucking situations, this would have to be number 1.”

“Are you drunk?”

“A little bit.”

“Are you at home?”

“YES.”

“Okay, good. But listen, don’t worry too much about it Hanbin. We’ll figure something out when it happens.”

“Why can’t we figure it out now?” Hanbin whines.

“Because it’s midnight and she hasn’t called you yet.” He reasons.

“Why can’t you just fix this?!”

He laughs despite their situation. “I promise I’ll think of something. It’ll be okay. I got through them, you will too.”

There’s a heavy dramatic sigh on the other end before Hanbin’s sleepy voice comes through again, this time accompanied by a yawn. “I’m in bed. Tell me something. I don’t want to think about girls anymore.”

“Umm, what do you want to hear?”

“Tell me about your seven kids and apple orchard. What kind of kids are you gonna have? And what kind of apples?”

The request catches him off guard, he didn’t expect this conversation to come back so soon. Or at all.

“Oh. Um. Probably all kinds of apples. I need to do some research on Apple species. You know any Apple experts?”

“I’m an Apple expert. I like the red ones and the Macbook Pro.”

“So helpful. Real expert.”

“Tell me more. I want to fall asleep.”

“Okay. Well. Firstly, no offence, but I’m gonna need an expert who knows more about apples than “red” and “laptop”. I kinda want to live on one of those big properties where the dogs and kids and chickens can run everywhere.  We’ll have to get one of those gigantic country farmhouses with a billion bedrooms because if the kids are gonna be anything like you, they’ll all want their own rooms.”

There’s no protest so he continues.

“I heard you can do a lot with apples though. You eat them, juice them, dry them, make all sorts of stuff with them, including pie! I’m not completely crazy you know. It might be a fake dream but I did attempt some research to make it sound legit.”

“Anyways, it’d be really cool sitting on the back porch and watching the sun set over all the trees. It’ll probably be really quiet and so far away from the city that you could probably see all those galaxies that you’re obsessed with.”

He waits for a response but gets none.

“Hanbin?” When there’s only breathing on the other line, he knows that Hanbin fell asleep. “Well. That’s the dream anyway. Goodnight baby.”

                                                            *

The birds chirp gleefully outside his window but Hanbin wants to die.

Actually, he wants to kill his phone first then follow it straight into hell.

“What?!” He grumbles into the offending device.

“It’s 9am.” Jiwon’s voice comes through, slightly concerned. “You okay? You don’t have to-”

“No. I want to.” He insists, despite his head spinning and his body protesting loudly as he stretches in bed.

“Okay. See you soon.”

He’s hungover and so dizzy that takes him three attempts to open the toothpaste cap and even longer to differentiate the shampoo bottle from the conditioner. It’s a relief when he finally sits down on his couch and eats cinnamon toast cereal without the world spinning around him.

Jiwon knocks on his door at 10:03am. He wanted to tease him about the promptness but decides against it, partly because his brain wasn’t exactly back online yet but mainly because Jiwon looked so adorable standing in his doorway like a hopeful prom date.

“Sorry I fell asleep on you last night. Your voice does that.” He says as he settles into the (now very familiar) passenger’s seat.

“My voice puts you to sleep?” Jiwon teases.

“Yeah it does. It’s sedating….but in a good way.” He knows that he must sound completely spaced out right now and wonders if Jiwon will pick up on it.

“So you don’t remember anything I said?”

“No, I do. Something about apple orchards and friendzoning girls and having seven kids.”

Jiwon looks over with a cautious expression. “That’s it? You don’t remember the rest?”

He racks his brain but he can barely remember what he just had for breakfast. “No. Should I have? Was it something memorable?”

Jiwon shakes his head, oddly relieved. “No no, nothing major.” There’s a grin at the end of it before the Beast roars into life down the street.

He’s feeling more human by the time they walk through the doors of June’s tattoo shop.

“Ahh look, it’s dumb and dumber! Finally here to ruin my fucking day.” June says brightly from his position in the counter.

“You really need to work on your greetings.” Jiwon says.

“It’s part of my charm.” June winks before hopping off the counter. He hugs Jiwon despite the protests before coming over to pat Hanbin on the shoulder. “Hey Hanbin. How’ve you been? This kid giving you any grief?”

“Of course he is. It’s driving me crazy.” He says with a smile.

“Knew it!” June says loudly. “Return him to the store and get an upgrade! He’s literally 2000 and late- a completely useless and out of date model.”

“Shut up Grandpa!” Jiwon calls out from the back kitchen.

“Ahh everything feels normal again.” June sighs. “Hey! I need to show you something. I got a book on geometrical line tattoos. Thought you might like something in it.”

Hanbin’s oddly flattered by the thoughtfulness “Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks.”

A heavy book is thrust into his hands as they settle into their seats. He flips through the pages, breathing in the new book smell and mentally ticking off some designs he already likes.

Jiwon comes back out and hands him a cow print mug. “Black. No milk. No sugar.”

“Thanks.” He smiles over the rim of the mug, feeling lame and dopey.

“You’re welcome.” Jiwon smiles back.

June rolls his eyes between them. “And yet he forgets my birthday.”

Jiwon breaks the eye contact to scowl. “That was one time and you said I was forgiven when I got you the PS3.”

“Did I? That doesn’t seem like something I’d say at all.”

Jiwon groans. “Can we just get started? Instead of sitting around and arguing like always?”

“You’re right. We can work and continue to argue like always.” June says with a nod.

Hanbin settles in his chair as the ink gun buzzes into life. He sticks Post-It notes on the pages of the design book that interest him and feels his worries melt away. It was a weird combination really, the contrast between the sterile smell of alcohol disinfectant and the familiar herbal fragrance from the tea Jiwon made. It was almost as contradictory as the mechanical sound of the tattoo gun bouncing off the soothing peach coloured walls to accompany the Al Green song that June has playing over the speakers. It was mismatched and scrappy and strange but he loves it. It all reminds him of Jiwon in a way; how he was the perfect combination of hard industrial angles and soft warm smiles.

He is so deep inside his head that he completely misses the conversation happening in front of him.

“Right Hanbin?”

He looks up, dazed. “Huh?”

“Warren G is the better rapper but Dre is the better producer, right?”

“Bullshit.” June replies. “Dre is better at both.”

“They’re step-brothers.” He says absentmindedly.

“That’s so not answering the question.” June mutters.

He shakes the cobwebs from his fuzzy mind and starts again. “Well, Warren has a smoother technique if you’re only arguing about the west coast rap style. Dre is definitely better at producing though. Eminem wouldn’t be anywhere without Dre. So yeah, Warren might be the slightly better rapper but Dre’s definitely the better producer.”

They both stare at him before Jiwon looks across as June with a smug smile. “Told you so.”

June turns the ink gun back on. “Oh great, you’re gonna start arguing as a team now? I’m so excited about this new development.” He says blandly.

Jiwon gives him a wink, which wasn’t so much a wink as a co-ordinated blink with both eyes.

“Maybe Yoyo can come here and help you win all these arguments then?” Hanbin says as politely as he can.

Jiwon laughs loudly, trying not to move his arm but failing miserably.

June gives them both a withering look before turning the ink gun off again. “Okay. Very funny. You’re very funny over there Hanbin. But you just made your idiot boyfriend here move so one of the roses is now a bit crooked. Congratulations, you both played yourselves!”

Jiwon looks over at him with a grin. “Totally worth it.”

“Ahh, let’s take a break. Your ugly face is annoying and my back is kinda killing me today.” June announces, stretching in his chair before going outside with his cup of tea.

Hanbin wanders over and sits in June’s seat, peering at the bloody mess of lines on Jiwon’s forearm. “Sorry about the rose.”

“I’m not. You should’ve seen his face! It’s been ages since I’ve seen someone take a shot at his ego.”

Hanbin gives him a wry smile. “You want another cup of tea?”

“Yeah, thanks baby.”

It comes out so easily and casually but he still freezes like a deer in headlights, unsure what to do or say as the butterflies in his stomach zoom around like they’re all on acid.

“Sorry. It just came out.” Jiwon says quickly.

“It’s okay. No big deal.” He says in a strained voice before walking off into the kitchen to fill the kettle with shaky hands.

He’s standing at the bench waiting for the kettle to boil when he can hear Jiwon shuffling in behind him.

“You don’t like it. The name.” It was more a statement than a question.

Hanbin shakes his head but doesn’t turn around. “No, I like it. I’ve just never been called that before. It was just kinda weird, that’s all.”

He feels a breath against the back of his neck and the heat radiating off Jiwon’s body as he comes to stand behind him. “Is it cool enough for you?”

“No. It’s terrible.” He says, smiling to himself.

Two tattooed arms come to rest on either side of him, caging him in the middle. His heart races in anticipation as he stares at Richard Parker’s tail and the new crooked rose on Jiwon’s tanned skin.

“So you’re okay if I keep calling you that?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.”

“Okay…baby…”

The way it comes out sends a shiver all the way down his spine. There’s lips against his ear, it’s barely a touch but it makes him so giddy that he feels like he’s about to jump off a cliff or do something equally stupid.

And then he hears it again, in Jiwon’s deep rough growl, the one that’s gentle but demanding and playful but emphatically possessive.

“Baby…”

After that, Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from turning around even if he wanted to. He sees shiny half hooded eyes for a split second before Jiwon leans down and closes the small distance between them, his mouth fitting over Hanbin’s with a soft warm pressure.

Jiwon tastes like earl grey tea and cinnamon toast cereal and he kisses like he lives life: confident, curious, full of purpose and with no room for doubt.  

And messy.

If there’s one word to describe Jiwon, messy would be the first thing that comes to mind.

Hanbin is pressed against the bench as their kiss deepens, his lips already feeling swollen and there’s so much saliva between them that he can feel it across his jaw. His hands grabs the front of Jiwon’s t-shirt when he feels an insistent tongue trying to lick his mouth open, they both moan when he finally does.

But just as he’s trying to remember everything about the moment the kettle suddenly begins it’s high pitched and obnoxious beeping. It takes him by surprise, startling his eyes open and making him jump forward to twist his hands into the fabric of Jiwon’s tshirt so forcibly that he feels it stretching and protesting.

“Fuck that’s loud.” Jiwon remarks as he pulls away, slightly out of breath. He reaches over to turn the kettle off and starts laughing when he sees Hanbin’s stunned face. “You okay? Had another heart attack?”

Hanbin narrows his eyes and shoves at the solid chest in front of him. “Yes you jerk! Don’t pretend like it didn’t scare you too.”

“Maybe a little.” Jiwon murmurs before pulling him back against his chest. “Come back here. Kiss me again.”

Hanbin carefully grabs his right arm above the reddened tattooed area and leans back in. It’s just as hot and sweet and infuriatingly good as the first time. He’s tries to catalogue every happy sound Jiwon makes, the way he tastes and the hard wall of muscle underneath his soft worn-in t-shirt.

It’s then that the front door slams shut, followed by June’s sheepish, “Sorry, it’s just me! My bad!”

They reluctantly break for a second time, Jiwon frowning and groaning in frustration. “Why is the universe cock blocking me?” He mutters.

Hanbin colours at the choice of words. “I don’t know. Did you pay your taxes this year?”

“Yes! And now I’m being punished.” Jiwon whines, indignant.

They hear June shuffling around the main room so Hanbin smooths out the front of Jiwon’s tshirt and pushes him away.

“Go. I’ll bring out the tea. I don’t want him asking about this. You know he’s gonna tease you all day.”

“Hey by the way, if he ever hears you calling me bunny, he’ll never take me seriously again.”

Hanbin gives him a smile as he reaches up to wipe at Jiwon’s lower lip with his thumb. “He never took you seriously to begin with. Now go, bunny.”

Jiwon leans in to give him one last kiss in his cheek. “Okay, baby.”

He gives Hanbin a dopey smile as he backs out of the kitchen. Hanbin shakes his head but does nothing to stop his own dopey smile from forming.

It takes him twice as long to make the tea this time. He has to stop and replay what just happened, occasionally touching his lips to see if he can still feel anything on them.

He pours the tea carefully and tries to keep his face neutral when he brings it out to the main room, sneaking looks at Jiwon’s face when he and June are both peering down at the inky roses and discussing the best way to fix the crooked lines (Jiwon asks that they stay crooked).

Before he can stop himself, he lets out a sigh that’s way too loud and causes both guys to look over.

“What was that for? We keeping you up?” June asks. “You need colouring books over there?”

He scoffs. “Is that what Yoyo does when you’re annoying him?”

June gives him sullen look before turning to Jiwon, “Can you get a new boyfriend? This one is too salty.”

“Nope, sorry bro. I’m keeping him forever.” Jiwon laughs happily and gives him another wink. Stupidly enough, right in the middle of all his thoughts, the only thing Hanbin can think about is the fact that Jiwon still can’t wink properly.

Oh well. He wants to stay forever and wonky winks are only a small price to pay.