#my lifelong affliction

[cheekylittlepupp]

My lifelong affliction..

[my-darling-boy]

(TW injury description)

I am SO glad you asked I lose my mind over this man. Sidney Beldam! He’s most known for his miraculous recovery from a major facial injury sustained while he served as a young sergeant in the First World War. If you’ve read the Facemaker by Lindsay Fitzharris you might recognise him! Sources differ slightly about his story, so I’ve pieced it together as best I could. The photos below were from about February 1919!

Born in 1897, Sidney was about 17 living with his mother in Cambridge, England when the Great War commenced. While he didn’t enlist initially, he was soon conscripted when it came about in 1916 though thankfully he was in a non-combatant role driving lorries transporting soldiers to boats headed for France. It’s where he learned he enjoyed driving! However in April 1917, Sidney was transferred to the Machine Gun Corps and eventually rose to the rank of sergeant where only 7 months later, his life would change forever.

During the battle of Passchendaele, one of the muddiest most gruelling segments of the war, Sidney was on the frontlines when a shell burst, sending a shrapnel fragment tearing diagonally through his nose and the right side of his face. The young soldier collapsed face first into the mud which ended up saving his life as falling backwards would have caused him to choke on his own blood. For three days Sidney laid in a mangled heap floating in and out of consciousness while vermin scurried about his body and the other dead and wounded around him. No one would ever know the details of those agonising three days, but the trauma he experienced there left him with a lifelong phobia of rats and cockroaches. After the initial wounded had been cleared out, a wandering band of stretcher bearers discovered Sidney alive after one man touched him with his boot fully expecting him to be dead. Miraculously, he was still clinging to life.

The 19 year old sergeant was rushed down the line and then transferred to two different military hospitals where his wounds were hastily stitched in an effort to save his life before infection could spread. Unfortunately, closing the gap where he was missing flesh in his cheek caused his upper lip to be pulled into a sneer and a sunken depression formed where most of his nose was missing around the bridge. Still, he was lucky to be alive, which he later used to remark. Well he was luckier still as he would be transferred to Sidcup military hospital in Kent where he would become a patient under Sir Harold Gillies, the man often considered the pioneer of modern plastic surgery. When he arrived at hospital in 1918, his wounds were healed but his face still bore the heavy trauma of his experience. If you want to see his photographs upon arrival, I won’t post them here but if you search his name, the photos are everywhere. IMO they’re not graphic but I know it can upset some people.

Gillies went to work trying to restore Sidney’s face. This required him to reopen the wound in his cheek where a skin flap was grafted to allow his upper lip to return to normal. He also folded down a skin flap from his forehead in order to create a new nose. Behind his facade, a series of tubes and canals had to be inserted for proper sinus drainage and other unnamed functions. While his initial handful of surgeries did most of the work to reconstruct his face, Sidney underwent over 40 surgeries between 1918 and the 1930s, some reconstructive and some to evacuate the tubes behind the flesh, meaning the common cold was a routinely painful affliction for him. Gillies understood operations were traumatic for the men at Sidcup, especially since most required more than one, and so made a point about creating a lighthearted ward environment, one Sidney says was quite jolly with the staff doing everything they could to make them feel comfortable and dignified as possible. And while I thought the topmost photos were the most updated case study photos for his recovery, I stumbled upon another set from 1920 in the Faces of War by Andrew Bamji I have not seen posted anywhere!

And lads listen. In such a sweet little twist, while Sidney was still recovering from the bulk of his major surgeries, a local pianist by the name of Winifred volunteered to play for the resting servicemen, all of whom had some form of disfigurment or amputation. Carrying in her sheet music, she and Sidney laid eyes on each other for the first time and she later remarked how his smile instantly lit up the whole room! For them, it was love at first sight. The two were soon married, and although it was in the 1920s, I don’t have an exact year for this. This most likely came after Sidney was finally discharged from service in 1921. There is a photo of their wedding and y’all look how SWEET!!

Between his initial surgeries and army discharge, Gillies asked if Sidney would be his personal chauffeur, an offer he took up quickly as he loved driving from his time with lorries during the war. One somewhat humorous account tells of Gillies—who was a bit scattered at times—asking Sidney to renew his driver’s license as the surgeon left it until the last day to take care of; Sidney in a rush waited in a long line at the county hall before jumping the queue and begging the administrator to expedite his employer’s license as it was needed to drive him to the hospital the next day. The man refused, even for a surgeon to get him to his patients. Sidney went to another staff member who was friends with Gillies and begged him the same. The man cheerily agreed but was still in need of a signature from the stubborn administrator who again refused... at least until he found out Harold Gillies nearly won a golfing championship, at which point he took Sidney to his personal office to expedite the license as he was happy to do business for a skilled golfer (apparently saving people’s lives doesn’t matter as much??). A no doubt perplexed Sidney was finally able to get back to the hospital on time!

After his army discharge and most likely about the time of his marriage, Sidney moved back to Cambridge where he worked for the council as a rent collector. He was so well liked, apparently even from the people he collected from, that he soon worked his way to Housing Manager for Cambridge. About this time, he had a daughter, Pam. Every account I read of him, people gush about how sweet he was. His wife recalls how Sidney was always adored by all his family and friends. His granddaughter Marilyn McInnes in an interview said, “He was the most warm and optimistic and loving man. I adored my grandfather, I was constantly on his lap as a small child. I never noticed anything funny about his face, I guess I thought all grandads looked like mine.”

Sadly, Sidney Beldam passed away from cancer at about 80 years old in 1978. But considering the man was given 6 months to live and ended up living for 60 years more surrounded by a large and loving family, I’d say he certainly had a full life. There is a picture of him and his wife in the 60s and they are absolutely charming!!

But anyway that’s me done rambling I’ve a massive crush on him. His story makes me genuinely happy to tell and I’m so glad you asked!

[gemsofgreece]

You really should know about Storm "Daniel"

Unlike how much all of us Greek blogs notify our tumblr communities about the regular (at this point) arsons wildfires afflicting Greece, we did not say much about the floods the country has been suffering from right now. There was a mention here and there and I even made a joke post as the storm was starting but not a lot of stuff in general. So, I think there's a couple of things you should know and I feel like I could address about it and actually it's not just about Greece. So I believe this could interest a lot of people and it should be something known worldwide.

In the beginning of September there was an alarm about an extreme weather phenomenon forming above the Ionian Sea at the west of mainland Greece. In truth, the phenomenon was not caused by the climate change. It was just a very rare occurence where a high pressure atmosheric system was sandwiched between two currents of low pressure. Low pressure systems are the ones resposible for stormy weather while high pressure systems generally create stable weather. As the low currents encircled the high pressure system, the storm that had started forming became unusually stable for a storm. As a result, the storm moved northeast above Thessaly and other regions of the central part of Greece and... just decided to stay there for an indefinite amount of time. Furthermore, because it's September and the Ionian Sea had warmed up throughout the summer, the medicane (Mediterranean cyclone) gained tropical features as it was forming, pushing its intensity to extremes unknown to this area.

The storm remained above all of central Greece for about 4-5 days but at the meantime it was causing side-storms in neighbouring countries, such as Bulgaria and Turkey. Both countries suffered from floods causing damages and deaths.

Istanbul, Turkey (CNN).

Tsarevo, Bulgaria (CNN).

Four people died in Bulgaria and seven in Turkey.

But like I told you the core of this was exactly on top of Greece's central mainland and islands. So what happened there? I happened to experience this shit first hand. My recollection of it is that it was unlike any other storm I had experienced before. My knowledge on meteorology is not very advanced, however I believe due to the high pressure part, there were actually no winds at all - or they were insignificant, so it wasn't like what you might have in mind as a conventional cyclone. It was a rainstorm but it was like a rainstorm from hell. The crucial part is that in Greece summer violent rainstorms may last for about five minutes but certainly not for five days nonstop. There was no pause, not even for a second. It kept pouring and pouring in indescribable volumes, without decreasing or slowing down, not for a moment. The fourth day it started taking short breaks.

As a person with a phobia of lightnings since childhood, I kept wearing earplugs throughout all these days. For four days, ten seconds did not pass without at least one lightning shrieking exactly on top of our heads. In the end, I am dead serious, I think my lifelong phobia has been cured somewhat due to this extreme exposure that eventually had a numbing effect. I think only the first day there was a record of 7,000 lightnings. I believe there must have been dozens of thousands overall. The lightnings also caused fires but the downpour was so overwhelming no fire could ever stand a chance.

Whether during or after the rains, what I was seeing outside was post-apocalyptic. The only thing missing was the zombies. It really looked like a background from a videogame, including a constantly lit up sky. I was not in danger though people dear to me were. The worst for me was a huge fall in the quality of living but that doesn't matter. The rains caused severe destructions across cities and villages. They caused floods, they broke bridges, they broke a massive number of roads, they made walls collapse, they destroyed springs, they damaged water and electricity outlets entirely, they drowned flocks and flocks of animals, they destroyed mountainous and coastal villages alike, they made cars float and fly over each other and they uprooted houses.

Village in Mount Pelion, Greece.

But that's not the end of it. Four days later, the storm moved southwest towards the Ionian sea, basically to the place of its original formation. It side-swept over Athens in the meantime, flooding the city, but that doesn't mean much since I could cry and Athens would still flood with my tears. Anyway. AFTER the storm left, the floods caused by it started multiplying and expanding. Picture that: a crystal clear sky, a bright sun and your phone screaming state alerts about evacuating your village or town because a lake has launched at you! Here's the thing: Thessaly is a massive plain surrounded by a ring of mountains. Half of those downpours fell right on the lowlands causing floods and destructions the first days. The other half however fell on the mountains, filled the streams heading down and they all met up and filled the lakes and the large river of Thessaly, Pineios and they all basically exploded the next days. Pineios especially exploded both in its western and eastern part, sinking the entirety of Thessaly's plains under water. As a result, floods were actively taking place days after the storm had ended and the weather was good. The phenomena have only started subduing since yesterday.

The overflowing of the river, trapped by the mountains.

Farmers won't be able to work this year and next year is questionable as well. There are huge concerns about various epidemics breaking out as more and more dead animals are found in the waters. Entire villages are under the water. There are estimations that some villages in west Thessaly might have been lost forever and their residents will have to move elsewhere. Sixteen people have died from the rainstorm and the floods.

Actual villages in Karditsa, Greece.

A more longterm danger is that the ground received such an unnatural amount of water that it might have been severely eroded and destablised, making it vulnerable to natural disasters I don't want to utter. Many roads are either broken or bloated and Thessaly has been cut out from communication and transportation with the rest of the country. To this day, there are maps guiding people how to drive from North to South Greece and vice versa by entirely skipping Central Greece! (Hint: they will have to drive through Epirus, aka western Greece.) The first days there was also complete isolation from what was happening in the country and the world and also the very regions we were in as we had no electricity and our only chance was getting a call from somebody being elsewhere and telling us what is going on.

Volos, Greece (CNN)

Many regions have received within 2-4 days 55 times their monthly amount of rain or more than twice the yearly amount. Greek meteorologist Christos Zerefos estimated that such a phenomenon occurs every 300-400 years. Meteorologists were alarmed internationally - with Germans and Americans reportedly saying they hadn't studied such a phenomenon again in their career. Its intensity was record high in the history of Greece and right in the top of Europe's as well. They also agreed that such a phenomenon would be devastating even if it had hit the most advanced and prepared country.

BUT THIS IS NOT THE END. The weakened Daniel seemed to slowly move towards South Italy but it decided to take a turn and headed south towards Libya and Egypt. Quite possibly, as the storm was once again travelling across the warm Mediterranean Sea, it was rejuvenated and gained even more tropical traits. Eventually, the medicane hit Libya with unprecedented force.

The cyclone travelling from Greece to Libya.

The toll it took on Libya is unspeakable. As I am writing this,

More than 5,226 people are killed and more than 10,000 are currently missing.

Like, can you wrap your head around what I am talking about? I don't see this shit being acknowledged enough across the world. I am checking this again and again, to ensure I am reading this correctly.

Daniel has officially become the deadliest medicane on record.

Eastern Libya, from Al Jazeera.

In the meantime, Greeks found opportunities to practice their favourite sport: political infighting. People who weren't even here when hell broke loose say that if this or that was properly done, we would not have problems at all. I even saw an idiotic Greek expat comment how "we got drowned in a little bit of rain". The truth is we should bloody thank our lucky stars and I say this with the entire awareness of half of Thessaly being currently underwater. It is true that Greek governments and people have done so many things badly, like building on top of streams and rivers, changing rivers' natural route, drying up natural lakes and all that shit that guarantees you are going to have massive problems once a serious storm breaks out. Also, the disaster revealed that there was once more a very questionable management of all the money given by the EU for anti-flooding measures after a previous flood (Ianos). Of course, I would be happy if at last we viewed this disaster as an opportunity to improve ourselves and the management of our land, however whatever happened these days wasn't the fault of anyone in particular. On the contrary, A LOT worse could have happened. A lot. Maybe Libya is not an indication because if Greece is not used to such extreme rain phenomena, then Libya is probably ten times less used to them, however we should not forget that this monster was STUCK at least five days over the heartland of Greece. For this alone we should damn be thankful we did not get it any worse and that the land endured in any way and of course now we have to correct old mistakes as well but let's do it united and determined and without wasting time once more in pointless infighting, which in this case might even be unfair. (In fact I think the thing we should blame the state the most about was not making it clear beforehand that this was going to be unprecedented, not just "very severe". They probably didn't want to cause panic and mayhem but still. We should know.) Of course I am not talking about how the state will treat the afflicted regions from now on, which is entirely its responsibility. And we should stand next to Libya. Greece has its wounds to mend but it should absolutely provide support to Libya. We know what this freak phenomenon was like.

I know this text is long but please consider reblogging this. We should know what happens on our planet. Thousands of people are dead from a freak phenomenon devastating regions across lands and seas. Also forgive any mistakes I might have made although I believe the information is correct for the most part. I didn't speak more about Libya because I don't know enough to analyze the situation as much. Perhaps there are ways of supporting the country too. As a last note, this phenomenon was not freakish because of the climate change - it was just a very unusual occurence. However, the - otherwise normal - warmth of the sea did feed and intensify the storm and the climate change might in the future cause these super rare, accidental phenomena to become more frequent.

[sokosmic]

Synastry Observations #2

💙 Their Mars in your 3rd House makes them want to talk to you all the time. Conversation tends to flow freely. You inspire each other's thoughts and ideas. They tell you things about their siblings or neighbors. You enjoy running errands together. Frequent talks about sex and sexting isn't unusual for this overlay.

🤍 Moon overlaying the 9th House can indicate that there is significant distance between the two of you. Long distance relationship. Person from a different culture or ethnic background. This overlay also indicates that you may share similar religious beliefs or philosophies on life.

💙 Venus opposing Uranus can also indicate a relationship between two very different people. This aspect in synastry brings excitement, especially in the beginning. The Uranus person sends electrifying signals to the Venus person, who is drawn to the Uranus person. There needs to be some grounding and enduring aspects in the rest of this synastry for a relationship to last with this one. This aspect can also manifest as an on/off relationship because the two are activated towards each other through transits.

🤍 Having Mercury square Mercury in synastry can be tough. Here the people involved struggle with communication and understanding each other during critical and even non-critical moments. When Mercury squares in synastry, even small misunderstandings can quickly escalate to bigger disagreements. Because squares are typically created by signs of the same modality, but different elements, the minds of these people clash because the approach is different. For instance, a Cancer Mercury and Libra Mercury both are Cardinal and the mind works fast for these signs. But Cancer's mode of communication is filtered through the emotions (Water), while Libra filters through the mind (Air).

💙 When their Venus is in your 7th House, you find them very attractive. They embody what is beautiful to you. As the House person, you have the attributes and qualities of what Venus values in love and partnerships. The Venus person values you. This overlay can also indicate the Venus person coming into the House person's life to increase value or make money together.

🤍 When a person's Mars conjuncts another's Chiron, the Mars person has come to help facilitate healing for the Chiron person. As long as the rest of the synastry supports it, Mars isn't afflicted, and the Chiron person has already done some shadow work to address wounds, this is a very positive aspect in synastry.

💙 I've noticed when Saturn conjuncts the North Node in synastry, it can indicate a lifelong friendship. Of course, this can develop into a romantic partnership, or even start off romantic and end up as friends. But essentially, the people involved become bound together with this aspect. It is often the Saturn person who gets stuck on the NN person. Saturn initially introduces structure and discipline to the NN person. The NN person shows Saturn how to lighten up and allow lessons to evolve naturally. This aspect in synastry can also indicate creating 'good' Karma in this lifetime. Often there is an age difference involved.

🤍 Neptune conjunct Vertex in synastry can be a beautifully fated connection or an extreme nightmare. When Neptune is positively placed within the natal and in synastry, this aspect brings a brand new, positive perspective to the Vertex person about compassion and unconditional love. But because of the nature of Neptune and the potential for illusions and deceit, if Neptune is ill placed or badly afflicted, Neptune will teach the Vertex person about seeing clearly, setting proper boundaries, and using their intuition.

These are my observations and opinions. Take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Thanks for reading!

-So.Kosmic 👽💜💫

[sitp-recs]

BL Reclist - Part 3

Thanks to @pullatta’s encouragement I come bearing more BL gifts! This is the third part of my manga/manhwa recs. This list compiles some of my current reads (the other 3 were mentioned in previous lists: Shutline, Steel Like Silk and Semantic Error). Curiously, some of these have an art style that isn’t what I usually go for, but the plot is so good and characters so compelling I couldn’t resist. There’s a bit of everything here: pls mind the heavy themes for #8; go with #3, #6 or #7 for feel-good slice-of-slice, with #10 for a fun rivals to fuck buddies to lovers. #9 has the prettiest art and top notch angsty historical romance. #2 brings sexy & tender vampire love, #4 and #5 are the way to go if you you’re looking for adult, nuanced and introspective stories. If you wanna choose only one go with Momentum, a masterclass in intimacy. I’d love to hear your thoughts! I think this will be my last manga list for a while, wondering if I should go for anime recs next? Hmmm 🤔

1. Codename Anastasia by Boy season & eunbi (E)

Agent Kwon Taekjoo is dispatched to Russia with two tasks. First, he must find “Anastasia,” a new weapon that could change the world forever. Second, he is to avoid Russia’s psychotic killer, Psikh Bognadov, at all costs. To assist him on his undercover mission, Taekjoo is sent a partner who only reveals himself to be a man named Zhenya. But Zhenya quickly proves himself to be just as dangerous and unhinged as the infamous Psikh himself.

2. FANGS by Billybalibally (E)

As the sole survivor of a vampire attack, En wakes up to find that his hair has gone white as snow... and, worse, that he's developed a craving of his own for blood. Fortunately, the vampire health and welfare organization FANGS is there to help with the transition, and the handsome Ichii steps up as his guardian and mentor. Swept up into a confusing and lonely new world where everyone seems to be hankering for a taste of his "virgin" blood, En must navigate the FANGS pairing system, an arrangement that sets up compatible vampires as mutual feeding partners... and partners in all other ways as well.

3. Fools Remastered by Yeongha / Parkdam (T)

Eungi has been in college without being engaged with others. One day by encounter, he finds the secret of underclassman Jeongwoo. Why are you so nervous to forget? A love story that’s both easy and difficult. See original story HERE.

4. Lovesick Dog by Songhyel (E)

If one word could encapsulate Noh Ye-gyum, it would be “lovesick.” Despite him loving people with all his heart, Ye-gyum finds himself trapped in an endless cycle of being used, betrayed, and ultimately abandoned. This time proves no different for him, as the family of his current ""master"" Jooyung drives him away to pave the path for Jooyung's advantageous marriage and future spouse. Suddenly, a mysterious man named Jooin appears, sweeping Ye-gyum away to his home. There, he is fed, clothed, and showered with an overwhelming amount of affection. As Ye-gyum senses the telltale signs of his lovesickness resurfacing, an uncertainty lingers: will this man also leave him, or could he finally hold the cure to this lifelong affliction?

5. Momentum by Park ji-yeon (E)

“Momentum” is a series of beautifully drawn vignettes that glimpse into the life-altering moments of several couples as they fall in and out of love. This BL features a series of characters learning how to love, understand, and forgive one another – and in some cases, the world – at different moments in their lives.

6. Our Sunny Days by Jeong seokchan (M)

Sung Ho’s not the kind you’d typically expect to settle down in the countryside. He’s in his late 20s, ex-military, and…a single father with a year-old baby his ex-girlfriend pawned off on him. Jobless and without any prospects but a house, Sung Ho hopes the peaceful Nuldongmae village will make a good new home for him and his daughter. Rumor has it that the head of the village, despite his young age, is a real jerk… But he won’t have to deal with that, will he?

7. Run Wild by Wuzhe / Zuoercongdong (M)

As soon as Jiang Cheng finds out he’s adopted, he’s abandoned by his adoptive family and sent to live with his deadbeat father, who has a gambling addiction. Everything about his new life, from his pathetic father to the unfamiliar environment, makes Jiang Cheng depressed. But then he meets Gu Fei, who’s like a shining bright light in this run-down city, and the two become each other’s salvation and hope.

8. Stigma by Marloong (E)

In the dark alleys of this city, there's no hope for trash like Sehyun. Having sex with strangers in the cramped stall behind a bar is just a typical Thursday night. But after a chance encounter with the brash and violent Boris, Sehyun begins to dream of living a normal life and an end to his restless nights. Boris is unlike any other man he's encountered. After a life spent bound by thorns, can time truly heal all scars?

9. Under the Plum Blossom Tree by Bori/Baekha (M)

As the son of a prestigious political figure in Joseon, Hajin has only ever been interested in studying to become like his father. That is, until he meets Namwoo, a young man who takes on various odd jobs as he struggles to pass his school exams. As they overcome hardships together and learn more about each other's history, they soon realize that their lives are intertwined in more ways than they thought.

10. You Get Me Going by Moscareto (E)

Despite being thirty-three, Young-won sure is gullible. He falls in love way too easily, comes on way too hard, and still believes that he’ll meet “Mr. Right” sooner or later. Not that he knows who “Mr. Right” is, but he sure does know about “Mr. Wrong,” a.k.a. Kang Hyun-woo. Young-won swears that he’ll never, ever get together with this polar opposite of his, but the universe sure seems to think different. One drunken night, they end up in the same bed and Hyun-woo proposes an intriguing deal…

[laz-262]

Um I got bored and decided to try out writing by drawing similarities between MK characters and the planets (yes from that tiktok slideshow) so enjoy my incessant brainrot :]

sun - is alone but still shines (liu kang)

Like duh, he is the keeper of time in this timeline, he gave up his mortality to keep the rest of the universe alive, and yet he will never find anyone that is able to live alongside him in fear of his attachment to them and doesn’t want to face the grief of loosing them (the only exception being geras)

I feel like he would’ve contemplated reaching out to kung lao but he refrained from doing so cuz it wasn’t his kung lao, and kung lao already had raiden. And since raiden never intruded their friendship before (in previous timelines), he wanted to do the same out of respect. It’s not like kung lao would even recognise the man standing in front of him either.

mercury the forgotten planet (mileena/baraka)

This feels like a stretch, but it feels that many choose to focus more on kitana over mileena, especially when sindel tells kitana that sometimes she wished kitana had been borned first. maybe it was partly due to liu kang’s design, choosing to indulge in designing kitana over mileena, who in the previous timeline, was nothing but kitana’s clone.

People in the empress’ inner circle sometimes doubt her ability to rule outworld, and kitana and jerrod do provide valuable input, but having tarkat does not necessarily cloud mileena’s mind, at least not yet, and she is more than capable of showing outworld her capabilities that she is fit to rule, just like her mother.

Either that or baraka, a famed merchant with everything he wanted, had everything taken away from him. tarkat, the disease that ravaged his body, that left his family dead, that shunned him away from his race. He was exiled to the tarkat community, forbidden from stepping into Sun Do until recent events took place.

Between Baraka and Mileena, I feel like the common thread is their tarkat affliction that clouds people’s judgement, that causes people to forget the previous feats they were capable of. Which causes them to be seen as nothing but their disease.

venus - planet of love, destroyed by global warming (johnny cage)

The man, the myth, the living legend. he had everything, he still does, and yet he didn’t feel it was enough. He wanted more, and that was too much to handle. And because of his own gluttony and greed, he lost his wife, the person that loved him for who he was, not what he could become. Yet, when he finally achieved what he could become, perhaps he had lost himself in the process. Maybe he did feel grief for his now ex-wife, but the Johnny Cage everyone knows doesn’t cry, he smiles and laughs it off. Right?

But Johnathan Carlton, the person he is, the broken man he is, allows himself time to grieve, to let slip the tears he didn’t know were there for so long he thought they’d dried up. and when he finally dries them away, perhaps finally has the ability to properly move on from everything, and figure out what he truly wants.

earth - slowly destroying itself (kuai liang)

The younger of the biological lin kuei brothers, breaking the lifelong pact he formed with said brother, moving on to form a new clan. Despite feeling hatred and betrayal towards bi han, he also can’t help but feel.. disappointed that things turned out this way, that they couldn’t have worked together, that he and bi han couldn’t fix their relationship.

He partly blames himself for their falling out, with his hot headedness stripping away the one thing that his brother and him had in common, his lin kuei badge. His feelings of betrayal not just because of bi han, but towards the lin kuei, eat him up from the inside.

He know that he isn’t at fault, and the lin kuei are now set on his and tomas’ heads, but he can’t help feel that he should’ve done more, to convince bi han from listening to that conniving sorcerer. now he leads a newly formed clan alongside tomas, and even though the running of a new clan tires him to no end, the gnawing feeling of loss of his brother still sets him on the path of self loathing.

However, there also lies the foolish hope that still burns like a weak ember in his heart, that maybe his brother is not all lost, and something can still be done to salvage him.

moon - doesn’t shine by itself, its light is just a reflection of the sun (geras)

Everyone is so focused on liu kang’s revelation of being a keeper of time it is also easy to overlook the role of the keeper of the hourglass himself. While geras does not mind the relative lack of recognition, he too owes his life and creation to liu kang, with the purpose of his whole existence lying in the large glass object that keeps track of all time.

It’s funny, the duality of how geras can turn out while under different keepers, from a ruthless, unstoppable soldier under kronika to a gentle yet insightful partner by liu kang’s side. it almost reflects how the moon has different phases when the sun and earth are in different positions. who knows, perhaps he would turn out differently in another keeper’s timeline. But his purpose remains forever unchanging, to stand by the keeper’s side, and to protect the hourglass, within which all of reality resides in.

even mars once had water on its surface (syzoth)

Ok hear me out, syzoth, an outcast from his own species, and zaterrans were shut out by outworld themselves. One could’ve never fathom he would’ve found love, and yet he did. A wife and kid, whom he loved unconditionally, as they did he. Maybe he had finally found the happy ending he could never find in his hometown.

But when shang tsung broke the cruel news to him, maybe he did finally break, realised that fate just enjoys playing cruel pranks on him. And this time, maybe he’ll just laugh dryly in its face. And maybe the tears that prick his eyes when he thinks back on perhaps the only two people that loved him without hesitation will fill the dried riverbeds on the desolate planet that is his heart.

jupiter - supposed to be a star but failed (kung lao)

I feel like this is another given, kung lao was never meant to be the champion, at least in this timeline. He tried, he tried so hard to prove himself, if not to raiden but to himself, that he was enough, and yet he couldn’t even prove that his best was enough. forever a walking second place medal.

Yet there is so much about him he doesn’t see in himself that so many others can see so clearly, his jokes, his get going personality, his ability to light up the room, to get completely different people to work together. It feels like such a paradox, he gets caught up in both his perfections and flaws he doesn’t see the things that make him a truly enjoyable person to be around

saturn is slowly loosing its rings (raiden)

Guys let me cook pls. Raiden, the farmer boy that became earthrealm’s champion, obviously a lot of responsibility comes with the title. He goes on to become the shaolin’s newest master, and slowly more commitments start to get piled on him. But he still smiles, and graciously accepts the load given to him.

Nevertheless, a day only has 24 hours, and most of that time is taken up by these responsibilities. While raiden is grateful for the opportunities he’s given, he slowly looses out on time spent with his closest companions, with his family. His grip on his previous life in fengjian slowly loosens and gradually becomes nothing but the past. Even though he still visiting his hometown, he knows he can’t return in fear of endangering all those he holds dear there, with kung lao and his hat the only pieces that remind him of home.

uranus was once closest to the sun, but slowly drifted away (kitana)

Kitana, at least to liu kang, was prob his everything at one point, the love of his life, and yet he managed to fail to keep her safe, watching in broken arms as she slipped away from him. even now as keeper of time, he can do nothing but watch from afar as the kitana he knew was instead a completely different person, despite wearing t he same face.

Titan kitana, his kitana on the other hand, didn’t even know that her liu kang still existed outside of her timeline, so close and yet out of reach. she moved on, carrying out her duties as keeper of time as sand continued to fall in the hourglass. Only did she finally come face to face with liu kang, her liu kang, did she realise how much she missed him, and how long it had been since she saw him, always holding a secret flame of hope of seeing him again despite creating him in her own timeline, she, much like her liu kang, could do little in interfering with the timeline, to come undone and let all her emotions flood out to the person that wouldn’t even recognise her

neptune is slowly moving away from the solar system (bi han)

Bi han always wanted more, he wanted power over the realms, rather than merely safeguarding it. So when he decided to accept shang tsung’s deal, he thought he did what was right for the clan. But what he didn’t realise that by making a deal for everything, he had already lost it all.

The 2 brothers that stood by him in whatever war they fought, turned their back on him when they witnessed his endless thirst for authority. And by siding with shang tsung he had already lost any previous ally he had in the past.

While he initially thought that it was of little consequence, after shang tsung’s defeat, here he stood alone, with his clan, against the world. Of course, his clan was of no small scale, with cyrax and sektor by his side. but still he had never felt more alone

Though he would never admit it, he missed the presence of his brothers providing their unending support in their endeavours. he missed liu kang’s annoyingly good advice to their plans. Perhaps he believes that it is already too late to fix old wounds, now he faces his brothers’ new clan, leading the charge. There was nothing to do but continue moving forward, that’s just how the threads of fate works, time only moves forward.

pluto was too small to seem significant (tomas)

Tomas, the youngest of the lin kuei brothers, and not even by blood. While bi hans words stung, they were no doubt the truth, despite how much tomas turns away from it. He was an orphaned child, picked up by the clan that decimated his entire family and took him in out of sympathy.

They tried to treat him like he really was a lin kuei, or at least kuai liang did, but tomas knew he didn’t and will never belong there. and yet, he still forced himself to believe that they were his real brothers, and treated them as such. But it was when bi han turned his back on him and kuai liang, did he realise that he would never be enough to bi han, that bi han never thought of him as his equal, that he never saw tomas significant enough to be his brother, to be lin kuei.

But maybe, with the creation of the new clan, the shirai ryu, maybe this is where he will find his new family, one that will not shun him for not being enough, one that sees him for who he is, not what he could never be.

[pepperochau]

hello everyone and good afternoon, my name is pepperochau and i am here to talk to you today about the one, the only, the futher mucker itself: dudunsparce. this will be a bit of the read, so follow the cut to see the rest!

majestic, is it not? personally i was not the biggest fan when it was revealed, but it has grown on me since then.

now, there is at current a very strong, loud refrain in the pokemon fandom that dudunsparce is a joke, and was always meant to be a joke. they say "people have wanted an epic dragon evolution for twenty years, and gamefreak has trolled them"; "dudunsparce is supposed to be a bad/lame/dumb design because it's a joke".

however! i disagree. i have been a lifelong fan of dunsparce, ever since i was a young malformed guttersnipe who thought it was a mythical pokemon, and i can safely say i've never wanted it to become a dragon. however, i also have never viewed it as a joke pokemon. so to hear people write off the design of dudunsparce as simply "a joke" has frustrated me to no end. so to you, reader, i would like to provide an explanation for why dudunsparce is what it is—a mess.

so, let's start at the beginning of the line with dunsparce.

many people will look at dunsparce's name and their mind immediately goes to dunce, sparce. and, fair enough, as it does look a bit dopey doesn't it? Other languages also give it names meaning "dumb" or "oafish" like the German Dummisel and the French Isolourdo respectively. now, I cant speak on how strong brand consistency was back in Gen 2, so maybe they were just aping off the same perception most English speakers had of the name. or it is possible that TPCi had always intended this interpretation. who is to say.

but there is a more obvious, widely overlooked aspect of its name: Dun. as in a subadult version of an insect, traditionally used when describing mayflies.

IN FACT this is such an underacknowledged aspect of its name that even on Bulbapedia, one of the most important secondary sources of information on pokemon next to serebii, i was hard pressed to find any mention of it at any point earlier than 2022, in an article revision that SIMILARLY went unnoted and uncommented on.

future editions of this article maintain both definitions of the word "dun".

but with this aspect of its name in mind, you'll notice that the rather un-tsuchinoko-like aspects of its design become more coherent, like its near-useless bug wings and stripey back. because its not just a snake with a fat tummy, but a fat bumblebee as well! wow!!! so cool!!!!!

now that this preamble is out of the way, we can finally move onto the mon of the hour: dudunsparce

pokedex entries for dudunsparce's 3-segment form mention that "the number of segments a Dudunsparce’s body has is determined by the Pokémon’s genes." at first glance it feels like a bit of a lore cop out for a formchange with no effect on gameplay. but remember how dunsparce has some partial insect inspiration? with this in mind, dudunsparce reveals itself to be, first and foremost, a reference to the Drosophila fruit fly's bithorax mutation:

as you can see, sometimes the genes for the termination of the thorax are copied accidentally, resulting in a copied thorax in the afflicted insect! and with "dun" meaning a subadult insect, we can reconceptualize dudunsparce from a simple joke, to a pokemon species whose inherent genetic mutations have kept it from reaching its true adult form! it even has the stripey butt that a fruit fly has!! so cool!!! a bit sad though, don't you think?

but there are still yet unexplored depths to the design of dudunsparce. for example: why does dudunsparce have a two-layered drill tail? why is there a random spiral on its first segment? well, allow me to introduce you to yet another muckerfuther: the cuélebre.

now i know what you may be thinking: this looks nothing like dudunsparce. and certainly, the resemblance is minimal. but allow me to share with you some mythological information about the cuélebre:

The cuélebre is a multi-winged serpent from Cantabrian and Asturian folklore, both of which are regions of modern-day spain.

The cuélebre's impervious scales grow thicker with age

The cuelebre's only weak spot is its throat

The cuelebre lives in deep caves

The cuelebre retreats to Mar Cuajada in old age, a place with diamonds covering the bottom

sound familiar? it should, because you will notice that dudunsparce mirrors all of these traits almost to a T:

Paldea is based on Spain, and Dudunsparce is a fat snake with multiple wings; or, a winged serpent.

Dudunsparce has much bulkier defensive stats than its preevolution Dunsparce (125/80/75 compared to 100/70/65), and has an extra hard "cap" layer on its tail

There is a seemingly random spiral pattern on the underside of Dudunsparce's first segment, or on its throat, regardless of form

Dudunsparce is mentioned by the pokedex to make sprawling nests in the bedrock, and is only find in the wild in Area Zero

The lowest point of Area Zero is covered in large, diamantine crystals

and for the people who still want dudunsparce to be a "joke": the cuélebre isn't even a very impressive dragon in itself: it hoards treasure and fairy women, and if you encounter it on the night of Midsummer, then you can kill it by tricking it into eating a bread or cake that's full of pins or hot irons. the worst thing it does in folklore that i can find is that it floods a town once because they weren't able to give it its daily cow head. the cuélebre is a nuisance first, and a (sort of) dragon second.

now, i don't want to be raining on people's fun, so i'll take a moment to take my lumps: i wasn't able to find very much information on the cuélebre, so there's a strong chance i am misrepresenting the creature here. aso, people are allowed to view dudunsparce as just a joke pokemon, and to like it as sich, and that's fine! i'm not here to tell you how to engage with your hobbies!

but, when i see that being the only reason that people give for liking the design? when i see that being given as the only reason given for why it looks the way it does? when i see pokemon videos on youtube that quickly bring up and then dismiss dudunsparce as a joke as if that was the only reason behind its design at all, without any kind of additional explanation or exploration of the design? it gets a bit frustrating, and tiresome. i mean hell, i maybe spent about three hours total in researching for this post, and i can confidently say that's far more time than all poketubers have spent on it combined.

the short of it os, that there is always more to be uncovered with fictional material. even with something so seemingly simple as a fat, goofy snake.

[misscammiedawn]

Hi, I hope this is okay to ask. There seems to be so much misinformation and I am kind of… profoundly confused. Can someone have headmates and/or be a system without having DID? Are they the same or do these all mean different things?

Hello, anon.

DID is just a diagnosis based on clinical observation. It's not observable in any scans and will not show a stripe on a saliva test. It just means that a doctor who is qualified to do so has given you a diagnostic screening and believes that it is your diagnosis.

It's also a remarkably weird one as it's simultaneously a lifelong affliction born in childhood which never goes away, but the diagnostic criteria for it is no longer satisfied when treatment has reached a point of which the symptoms are managed.

I truly wish there were better advice for you than to explore what you need to explore in your own life and assess your access to mental health care and whether or not you feel it would benefit you. When we received our diagnosis it was in association with our ongoing care for emotional breakdowns that were crippling us and erratic life destroying issues with maintaining relationships and a stable sense of personal identity.

The question should be less "do I need DID to have a system" and more "do I benefit from being diagnosed and treated?" and I can't answer that for you. The best I am able to speak on this question is to say not to think about it. It's an unimportant question in the grand scheme of things.

My personal experience with dissociative disorders is that my condition was hidden from me for much of my life and diagnosed and treated as CPTSD for most of my life, BPD after my transition and finally recognized and treated as DID in recent years. I think coming out as transgender and realizing that persistent feeling of "I feel like I am playing the role of [legal name]" did not go away was a good signal. We had a reason to feel like that prior to transition. We did not afterwards.

My personal belief on the formation of my condition is that in early childhood our environment was not safe and stable and we were unable to create a stable personality based on applied patterns that a child between the ages of 0-6 use to achieve their needs (attention, nourishment, protection etc) and so with no stable "core" personality state we developed a number of personality states that we shifted through to meet our general survival needs based on environment and those in turn became the foundation for a system of "parts" who make up the whole of me.

What I described there is an understanding that was reached in therapy based on The Theory of Structural Dissociation, itself a controversial piece of text (one of the authors disbarred for mistreatment of patients).

That all in to say I can only speak to my personal experience and my personal understanding of DID, which is based on our evolving understanding of the topic both as a system ourselves, as students of the medical dogma being released and as a patient of our current therapist.

These views, opinions and perspectives may and can change on a dime. There are a disturbing number of clinicians who do not believe chronic dissociative disorders lead to plurality in any regard. There are those in support communities who believe the number of people who are undiagnosed but experience plurality is as high as 15% of the global population.

Frankly. I'm not qualified to speak to anyone's experience beyond my own. All I can do is put out what we see and hear and feel and hope that it provides comfort for anyone out there who is as lost to themselves as we were to ourselves.

So can a person experience plurality without it being DID? Does every person who experiences plurality without trauma actually have a repressed and unacknowledged backstory?

It's none of my damned business.

Every person has their own story and their own baggage, much of which lays beneath the surface. We cannot fully know the depths of The Other and that is a scary thing because it means that someone could look at a person's lived truth and reject it...

And so the answer is simply "I do not know."

I can't possibly know.

I just care about people and believe them when they say things.

[cdyssey]

Texts

CW: Innuendo/Suggestive Language; Alcohol

A/N: The way that not one of my damn micro-prompts have ended up being actually micro. @dkc2017​

AO3 Link [The AO3 version is a little diff. from this one! I added some more to end!!]

—

It’s become somewhat of a Sunday tradition with them—Ava and Melissa skipping church to watch football together. They’re both sure that the good Lord will forgive them. Ecclesiastes does say that there’s a time and season for everything after all…

(“Damn straight that football season counts,” Ava had justified with a positively mischievous smirk.)

(“Hell yeah,” Melissa had agreed, her own resounding laugh clearly up to no good.)

It all started after they had unsuccessfully tried to foil Mr. J’s fantasy football team and realized that they stood a better chance of beating his ass if they teamed up and worked on their spreadsheets during game days. Sitting side-by-side on Melissa’s plastic-wrapped couch, they’re currently watching the Dolphins because Melissa has Tua Tagovailoa as her team’s quarterback, while Ava has Jaylen Waddle as one of her wide receivers.

“Ugh,” Ava groans as Waddle misses what should have been a fairly easy catch, slipping on the sleet-slicked turf. “We ain’t ever gonna whoop him if our boys keep playin’ like this.”

“You’re preachin’ to the choir,” Melissa snorts, and just as she reaches forward to grab her beer from the coffee table, her phone—which had been snugly nestled between her thighs—suddenly chimes once and then twice.

Two texts.

She leans back again and scoops it up—squinting at oversized font—and sees that they’re both from Barbara, asking if she wants to go on a double date with her and Gerald to see the new Avatar movie later this evening…

You and I can even share a popcorn this time, she tempts with the second text. We’ll add all the blessed butter that we want to.

Even as she’s digesting these tantalizing words, three dots bounce on her screen for only a few seconds before another white speech bubble appears with an elegant swoop.

Please?

Melissa frowns slightly at the implicit desperation, doesn’t know what to make of it, scared to read too much into it, even more afraid to ignore it if this is all she ever gets.

With Barbara.

Her best friend.

Scraps and dregs on the margins of her happy, heterosexual marriage. She’s learned to be resigned—if not content—to the crucial fact, a lifelong expert in the intertwined practices of abnegation and self-sacrifice. The eldest of six children in a Catholic household, the third parent in the room in so many ways, nothing has ever wholly belonged to her that she didn’t have to eventually share.

Clothes.

Toys.

Food.

Their parents’ six ways unevenly divided love.

All of it has prepared her for what her life has come to now, subsisting on stolen moments with Barbara Howard as though scavenging is a meaningful way to exist.

Hence, another double date.

Her, Barbara, Gerald, and Gary.

The two men get along well when they all go out, continually joshing about the cars they want to own some day... while she and Barbara are usually off in their own little world, carving out a sanctified space for themselves wherever they’re at, be it a restaurant, a movie theater, or a football game.

As always.

As is their norm.

Even though Barbara will hold her husband’s hand, and Melissa will dispassionately fuck Gary later, maybe in the forgiving darkness of the movie theater, the two women will accidentally brush shoulders.

On paper, it seems like a good enough way to spend her night.

In reality—

“Girl, don’t tell me you’re still seein’ that crusty ass vending machine guy,” Ava says, having apparently been peeking over her shoulder for the last few seconds. Melissa, caught off guard by the unexpected intrusion into her personal space, startles violently, accidentally elbowing Ava in the side.

“Damn!” She hisses in pain, pouting, poking her lower lip out, dramatically rubbing the afflicted area. “Cool it, Rambo. I was just teasin’…” 

“Not funny,” Melissa grunts unapologetically, crossing her arms over her chest. She suddenly feels exposed, out in the open, laid bare, like her texts with Barbara are as intimate as a diary and Ava is rifling through the pages. “And his name is Gary.”

“He looks like a Gary.”

“That sounds like an insult.” Melissa glares at her suspiciously. She supposes she should probably refute the idea of him being crusty ass, but an immediate defense eludes her.

Gary.

He’s a sweet guy, a good man…

… but he ain’t exactly gonna win awards for bein’ Romeo.

There are vibrators more romantic than him.

And far less crude.

“That’s ‘cuz it is,” Ava chuckles, clearly finding all of this amusing, but there’s something in the twinkling depths of her eyes that disconcerts the second-grade teacher—something keen and entirely knowing. She shifts uncomfortably where she sits, making the plastic beneath her squeak.

“Speaking of Barb…” The principal begins, tilting her head towards the still-lit up phone in Melissa’s hand.

She hastily clicks it off, even though she knows the gesture is futile.

The other woman has already seen.

“It sure is somethin’ that she can’t go out with her hubby unless you’re taggin’ along,” she muses shrewdly as color painfully floods Melissa’s cheeks.

“I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about,” she huffs, stubbornly returning her gaze to the TV. A stupid commercial for Valentine’s Day jewelry is playing.

Every kiss begins with Kay.

“She’s beggin’ you,” Ava goes on, undeterred, so stubborn when she digs in, when she cares. It would be endearing if it wasn’t so presently annoying. “And you know, our Mrs. Barbara Howard, proud, married woman of God, never begs.”

“She’s just lonely,” Melissa says automatically, and she could slap herself.

She flinches.

That’s precisely the part that she’s not supposed to fucking say out loud, and Ava jumps on the mistake readily, not missing a beat.

“She’s got a whole goddamn husband,” she shakes her head, and the thoughtfulness in the younger woman’s voice takes Melissa by surprise. She glances over and is horrified to see that her expression is a strange mixture of pity and understanding.

Ava gets it.

Melissa clenches the darkened phone in her hand and her heavy, aching teeth, successfully suffocating the next words on her tongue.

Even still.

Barbara is lonely.

She’s got a whole goddamn husband.

Even still.

[cyberphuck]

ROYAL ASSASSIN ABRIDGED: PRELUDE

My friend Razz wants to understand my shitposting about the Farseer Trilogy, but doesn't want to actually have to read the books, so I'm summarizing them for them (and you)!

 Read previous entries

 LAST TIME, ON DRAGON BOOK Z: Fitz is a bastard who knows telepathy and talks to animals. He's taught to be an assassin, then goes up to the mountains on a mission and completely fails at it. His uncle tries to kill him. His OTHER uncle gets married.

 CAST OF CHARACTERS (holy shit there are so many characters in this book)

 THE FARSEERS

Six Duchies royal family, of which several members are now dead. This will include Farseers-by-Marriage (Dead or head-exploded characters will have their own category).

 FitzChivalry Farseer: The POV character, Prince Chivalry's bastard. Loyal as a K-Pop stan who still has a BTS McNugget meal preserved in their freezer. He possesses both the Skill (Professor X telepathy) and the Wit (Dr. Doolittle animal chats).

 Prince Verity: Currently King-in-Waiting, a lifelong second-in-command who was suddenly thrust into a leadership role when his older brother fucked off to be assassinated. Recently married, super strong in the Skill, does not ask for consent before mind-molesting Fitz.

 Queen Kettricken: Recently married to Verity, she came all the way from the Mountain Kingdom to clean up Buckkeep and be miserable because she's used to doing Crossfit in the snow and now she has to sit and pretend to laugh at other people's jokes.

 Prince Regal: The sneaky, moustache-twirling evil younger half brother of Verity. He killed like four people at Verity's wedding and tried to murder Fitz with a hot tub, and they just sort of let him get away with it.

 King Shrewd: The current king, currently pretty old and afflicted with some kind of wasting disease. Fitz is technically bound to him by a pact he made as a child, but they both kind of ignore that most of the time.

 Chade: King Shrewd’s older half-brother on the wrong side of the sheets. An assassin. Lives in the walls. Has a weasel. Came out of the wall into Fitz's room and taught him how to be an assassin. Sort of a father figure, but the kind that yells at you to hold the flashlight steady while he works on the car.

 Patience: Chivalry’s widow. Helicopter-parents Fitz whenever he comes within fifteen feet of her. The ADHD champion of the Six ooh is that a book on rare ferns?

 NOBLES

 Duke Brawndy: Duke of Ripplekeep, a pretty stand-up dude. Father to Celerity and member of the Fitz Fan Club.

 Lady Celerity: Has a big ol' fourteen-year-old crush on handsome, virile Fitz. She's pretty okay for someone who was named after a vegetable you put peanut butter on.

 Duke Kelvar: Remember him? He finally manned his fucking watchtowers at Neatbay. Fitz fanclub member. Husband to Lady Grace, his young hotness wife whose dog Fitz pulled a fish bone out of.

 CASTLE AND STABLE FOLK

 Burrich: Fitz's primary father figure, the kind that takes you to football games and Hooters to try to flush the Gay out of you. Stablemaster of Buckkeep, and also has the Wit. Used to be heterosexual life partners with Prince Chivalry. Took several blows to the head last book and seems to be okay.

 Hands: Fitz's stablehand friend. He's been relegated to background character.

 Lacy: Patience’s serving woman and bestie. Makes lace, nods indulgently and will stab you.

 The Fool: Albino freak-teenager with a special interest in cryptids and making up rhymes about farting. King Shrewd's jester.

 Justin: Part of the Skill Coterie. Hangs out with Serene most of the time, card-carrying member of the Fitz Sucks and Smells Bad club.

 Serene: The only female member of the Skill Coterie. Treasurer of the Fitz Sucks and Smells Bad club.

 Carrod: Local fop and member of the Skill Coterie. In this book he mostly sneers at Fitz and says cringe things while everyone else is trying to work.

 Burl: Part of the Skill Coterie... is Burl even in this book? I can't remember. Less dumb than you think he is.

 Will: Part of the Skill Coterie. Hangs out in shadows and stares fixedly at people.

 Molly Chandler: A candlemaker and servant who wants to go back to being a candlemaker. Girlboss. Fitz would buy her bathwater.

 Rosemary: Kettricken's page. She's just a little girl. So cute. What's she doing? Oh, she's coloring. Aww.

 Wallace: King Shrewd's servant and sometimes healer. One time the Fool calls him Wall's-ass.

 Bolt: A guardsman who shows up at the end of the book to punch Fitz repeatedly in the face. I only mention him here because he shows up in the next book as well.

 Blade: An older guardsman, Fitz fanclub member.

 ANIMALS:

 Cub/Nighteyes: A wolf soul-bonded to Fitz. Talks in italics. Possesses the single braincell out of everyone in the entire series.

 Sooty: Fitz’s horse. Best mare, perfect cinnamon roll and can do no wrong.

 Vixen: Burrich’s dog. Good dog.

 Slink: A weasel belonging to Chade.

 OTHER NOTABLES:

 The Red Ship Raiders: Mongolian Vikings who have been Viking their merry way up and down the coast, burninating villages and kidnapping people to be Forged.

 Forged people: Zombies. It's a tiny bit more complicated than that, but you don't find that out for another like, six books, so: they're zombies.

 Lady Thyme: A horrible old woman who is really Chade in disguise. The Elderlings: Who are they? What are they? No one knows. 

 DEAD PEOPLE:

 Chivalry: Dead from probably assassination.

 Queen Desire: Regal's mom, dead from drug use but Regal THINKS it was assassination.

 Rurisk: Dead from poisoning by Regal.

 Cobb: Dead from stab by Fitz.

 Galen: Dead from Skill-explosion by Verity.

 August: Okay he's not DEAD, but Verity Skill-megaphoned him and he went to live on a farm upstate.

 Smithy: Went back to his home planet after Cobb hugged him and told him he was a good boy.

 Nosy: Went back to his home planet after saving Fitz from dying in a hot tub.

 MAGICS (I know magic is not a character, but they do have to be explained somewhere)

 The Wit: The ability to “bond” with certain animals and speak with them, as well as sense life force and to do a kind of mental shove at people. You tend to act a little like the animal you’ve bonded to. Witted people are considered gross and animalistic and are run out of town or put to death.

 The Skill: Telepathy. Considered the “birthright” of the Farseers. Most people can sense it at least a little, but it takes inborn talent and a lot of careful training to do anything useful with it. Skilling apparently feels awesome but if you give in to the temptation to fully open yourself to it you can get sucked out of your own brain.

 NEXT TIME: Part one of Royal Assassin Abridged!

[stealth-liberal]

Just saw yet another post featuring kpop idols and their "proportions". Let me be real clear here, an adult human being fitting their entire body through a clothes hanger or being able to wear a headband as a comfortable belt is not the great thing that you think it is. It's a massive, blinking, electric sign the size of something on the Las Vegas strip screaming about eating disordered behavior. Most likely anorexia nervosa or anorexia nervosa mixed with bulimia.

Let me again remind everybody of some very sobering facts:

1. Anorexia Nervosa has the highest body count of any mental disorder

2. Only 35% of anorexics ever actually recover.

3. 1/3 of all bulimics do permanent damage to either their esophagus, their large intestine and colon or all three. This damage negatively impacts their health and quality of life for the rest of their lives

Male or female, it doesn't matter, famous or obscure, it doesn't matter. Eating disorders can and will kill you. Eating disorders can and will give you lifelong health complications. The kpop industry is LITTERED with individuals who are so obviously suffering from various eating disorders that it is mind boggling that the fans don't storm the Bastille, so to speak, about it.

So here's some pushback on things people have said to me when I have posted/spoken about this topic:

1. "It isn't eating disorders, it's just that South Korean beauty and weight standards are so strict!"

Um... how in the almighty fuckity fuck do you think these people are adhering to those standards? With enforced eating disorders, that's how! There is no way to maintain these devastatingly small body weights in a healthy manner, it is not humanly possible. It may be company and culturally enforced, but it's still eating disordered behavior.

2. "My male kpop fave can't have an eating disorder because men don't have eating disorders! Only women have eating disorders!"

Nope, you're wrong. While the greater amount of people afflicted with eating disorders are female, males can and do make up a large minority of eating disordered sufferers. That amount is rising in all countries where the phenomenon is studied. Also, East Asian beauty standards are different than Western ones, this is very demonstrated in standards of male desirability. The "ideal" male body figure tends to be more slender in East Asia than in the West.

People will chase society's shitty standards, even when it hurts them. It happens ALL THE TIME in the West, the East is not immune, so it happens there too.

3. "What the hell do you know about eating disorders?!"

Years ago, my son died in my arms. I was not in a place where I could properly process that grief, so it turned inward. I stopped eating and what little I ate, I used laxatives to get rid of. I am 5'10" tall, and I got down to 99lbs. I would have died if it hadn't been for my loved ones intervening.

I recovered, I am one of the very lucky 35%. Unless you have also gone on the toxic merry go round that is an eating disorder, I know more than you can possibly imagine.

So I guess I only have one more thing to say: When will we stop pretending? When will we call this exactly what it is? When will we say enough is enough?

[ssruis]

Hi um i want to eat (affectionately) every post you make about pjsk you're like the smartest person out there. is that ok

Thank u… it helps to be afflicted by the wizards curse (lifelong love of character/story analysis resulting in the choice to pursue an English minor + adhd hyperfixation on miku tap tap game) (can’t stop thinking about the characters and if my interpretations are even somewhat ooc I’m compelled to fix it/figure out where I went wrong or I’ll perish)

There are a lot of other ppl on here (& twt as well although I kinda just lurk on there) with excellent character takes/analysis that I’ve learned from. I’m certainly not immune to being wrong (esp given I haven’t read all the stories yet and primarily focus on wxs/pjsk ocs that interact with them the most) which is why I love seeing other peoples takes/interpretations (even if it’s just to disagree. Something something you can iron out the incorrect/weaker points of your stance through debate. I know I’ve certainly gotten a better grasp on tsukasa by arguing against popular interpretations of his character.)

I hope my posts continue bring you joy/sustenance/inspiration to also analyze the pjsk ocs like lab rats. All that to say yes it’s ok.

[oldbaton]

First of all big fan of your blog sir baton. Second it breaks my heart to see you struggling with your body image 🥺 I hope you can get to a place where you can live and love with yourself, I can't imagine the pressure of being a NYC gay (I'm an aggressively rural, chubby gayboy for context)

It really is brutal. A therapist one time told me body image was my kryptonite mentally and that’s true. Lifelong affliction of mine. Anyways. That’s enough for internet strangers. Thank you 💚💚💚

[kariachi]

This post has taken ages as I sort through thoughts and ideas...

One chronic condition per each of my main four species.

~~

Crimson Syndrome

A genetic disorder in Erinaens and Erinaen hybrids affecting the intestinal tract

Disorder impacts the ability to absorb nutrients, leading to severe malnutrition and eventual starvation when left untreated

Also affects the fur, leading to a previously-distinct red coloration- this once tell-tale sign has since been undermined by color variations brought on through the increasing number of hybrids in among Erinaens

Typically congenital, though has been recorded as developing in patients as old as five

Most congenital patients die in the pouch. Congenital patients who do not are often the last of their litter to leave and exhibit evidence of stunted growth and development

Crimson Syndrome can be treated with potions to improve the body’s ability to absorb nutrients.

Special diets may also be prescribed depending on the individual case

This disease is a lifelong affliction at this time, but when treated is not terminal

Arquinavet

A sometimes chronic condition in Lenopan and some Lenopan hybrids affecting the ability to manipulate their body

Has a ‘stiffening’ effect on the amorphous body, making it more difficult for patients to move or manipulate and maintain their shape as they normally would and thereby impacting their mobility and shapeshifting abilities

Patients often report experiencing chronic soreness along with being more prone to strains and cramps, and having lower energy reserves than prior to their illness

Most commonly seen as a rare aftereffect of diseases affecting the nervous system and/or main mass, can present in individuals of all ages

Arquinavet can be temporary, with 37% of cases lasting no more than six months and some individuals recover after as long as twenty years. Still, in 56% of cases patients do not recover full mobility.

Symptoms do not commonly worsen, with most patients reporting no deterioration of condition past one year of initial symptoms. When symptoms do worsen, progression is slow. Severity of symptoms vary.

Treatments include prescription of relaxants and/or painkillers, and physical therapy

This condition is not terminal and at this time cannot be cured

Kanna

A collection of nervous-system-adjacent disorders experienced by Osmosians and Osmosian hybrids, affecting their ability to manipulate absorbed matter

May or may not be specific to one or more states of matter with symptoms ranging from inability to perform basic manipulations of matter outside the self to inability to consciously convert back from an absorbed material to paralysis of body parts transformed into an absorbed material

Potential causes in a patient include damage to or malformation of key points in the nervous system and/or brain, physical or mental trauma, long-term illness, and as a symptom of absorption-related disabilities

These disorders can be congenital and in such cases are typically diagnosed within the first season and lifelong

How long an individual who acquires one of these disorders will continue to exhibit symptoms varies widely depending on how they acquired the condition and what treatment they are currently undergoing

Symptoms do not typically worsen over time with the exception of those brought on by mental trauma, which may or may not worsen without treatment depending on the patient’s ongoing mental health

Impact on quality of life is variable, ranging from a need to avoid converting body parts to a need to remain safely indoors as much as possible to supplemented diets depending on the disorder, the patient’s lifestyle, and location to name a few factors

These disorders are not typically terminal, but patients whose disorders are in relation to liquids and gases are at increased risk of death or disfigurement compared to individuals without these disorders

Note: While these conditions may pass on their own, especially when the result of healing injury, it is still recommended that all individuals experiencing disordered matter manipulation see a professional as soon a possible

Collarfoot

A condition characterized by growth of the vestigial fourth toe bones among Perison

Often first noticed as pain and swelling just beneath the outside back of the ankle with symptoms worsening as the growth of the bones continues, if left unhindered growth may advance to the point of severe pain and impairment of mobility

Most often growth is kickstarted by injury to the affected bones, but is also well known to occur without outside cause in some cases- individuals with a family history of collarfoot are recommended to keep watch for potential symptoms, as it is believed one can be genetically predisposed to development of the condition

Growth may halt on its own, but experts do not suggest leaving collarfoot to develop, instead recommending undergoing drug treatment to halt growth if at all possible, as soon as possible, to limit severity of symptoms

Typical treatment of collarfoot beyond halting growth involves the supplying of painkillers as needed and the use of mobility aids if needed

Individuals with moderate to severe cases of collarfoot are recommended to keep weight off the affected leg as much as possible, for their own comfort and to avoid any further damage that may lead to a resurgence of growth

Severe cases commonly end in surgical removal of affected bones, especially if the issue resurfaces, though many doctors are reluctant to utilize such measures regarding mild or moderate cases

Though risk of development of collarfoot is relatively even among age brackets, the condition is prone to spreading more quickly in younger patients, and older patients are more likely to wait until the condition has reached moderate to severe status before seeking medical attention

Collarfoot is not terminal and progression can be stopped, but changes caused by the condition cannot be reversed without surgical intervention

[vvatchword]

Soooo I may have fucked up.

As you may not realize, i love people. I smile at everyone. I go out of my way to help folks, have no fear of strangers, and have no concept of hierarchy, so I treat everyone the same, from child to service worker to CEO. I also have some distinct quality that makes other people glom onto me. This has been a lifelong superpower/curse. For some reason, strangers can tell I'm a big ol softie from a distance. Thus I tend to attract everyone from kids to con artists, all for obvious reasons.

This quality used to drive me insane as a young adult. I lived in a town with a big mental institution, so it was common for people with mental disorders to literally seek me out of crowds. I note this because, well, what's the most common problem afflicting the homeless?

I've never lived in a place with such a big homeless population, so I never thought twice about my general behaviors and continued smiling at everyone, talking to them without hesitation, helping out with cash here and there, etc. Well, friends, there's just one problem with this: the homeless are treated like trash at worst and ignored at best.

So.

Uh.

Usually my interactions with them has been super wholesome. Big smiles back and forth, neat conversations, cool stories, you know. It took a year and a half before I realized I was fucking up (and it's possible I was being mistreated before, coincidentally, i just can't tell because I have the social skills of an affable dog). I got chased by two homeless guys for four blocks. I had to trick one of them to escape.

"never again!" I told myself. "Stop being so goddamn smiley!"

Does this work? No. Self is a golden retriever. Self wants to love on all the people. At one point I was telling Zak all about how I met a neat guy and listened to his life story and she was like, "STOP"

Oh. Yeah :(

(he went to jail for killing a man. In retrospect, i may be an idiot.)

For the second time in four months, a homeless dude has glommed onto me, and it's a little concerning. He's a street artist who I had a great interaction with about two weeks back. He was waiting at my bus stop in soft shoes and hospital scrubs with stacks of art all made up with craft paint. I was excited. I'd seen him at other bus stops and had wanted to peruse his wares. I told him so. He was so delighted. I bought a couple of pictures for $20 (you could choose how much to pay, i decided to treat him like I'd treat any artist) and put the art up in my office.

I saw him again yesterday and, uh.

He saw me and said, "Hello, my friend!" And got up for an awkward hug. I think I would have been more gung-ho had i not immediately flashed back to how the previous chase sequence started (overt affection).

"Koranado, how's the art going?" I asked.

"good, my friend, good. You know, I love you," he said.

I laughed nervously. I mean yeah you can use "love" affectionately, but I'm so bad at reading strangers and I didn't want to give him the wrong idea.

"how about this," he said. "I like you. So I don't get in trouble."

"haha I like you too," i said.

"I'm clean, you know," he said. "Got a full checkup from the doctor and I'm clean."

He was looking at me meaningfully, my friends in hell. Now, it is possible he was worried I thought he was dirty or something instead, but that wasn't a concern of mine at all. It's a Texas summer at 104°, everyone is a filthy bog monster, including me. I just don't know how to fucking lie.

"congratulations!" I said. "You know, every time I see you out here with your art, I smile. I hope you carry that with you."

"You are a mother's milk. Speaking of mother's milk, can I have any money for a meal? do you see any art you like?"

"I'm so sorry! I literally have no money. I'll come back when I get paid, though."

"that's okay. That's okay. Here, take this. Make sure no one is watching when you shower. No one is watching."

"advice to live by," i said. (Self!!! said my inner voice. Self why!!!)

He gave me pictures on the house--his best yet--but overall it was. Uh. A little cursed.

Now, I'm pretty sure this guy is manic, from some things I've seen. And who knows what his actual qualities as a human being are. But now I'm concerned about going back to my bus stop. And that makes me feel bad on multiple levels. The homeless aren't that far from any of us. They are human beings who deserve respect and care. But I also can't sacrifice myself in the name of kindness.

The world ain't fair, folks. The world ain't fair at all.