#my poor uncle who is playing cards with us every evening when his friend says fuck me and uncle says not likely to the room in general

[brainjuicey]

might fuck around and find out

[paisley-print]

Near The Water’s Edge:   Chapter Four

After fleeing your abusive husband, you find yourself in the small coastal town of July, North Carolina. Soon you meet Frankie Morales, Air Force Veteran and single dad. As the two of you grow closer, you begin to let go of your past and learn to love again. That is until a strange man shows up in town, and you ’re forced to choose between your safety or the safety of the people that you love.

Inspired by the novel “Safe Haven” written by Nicolas Sparks.

Series Master List

Frankie Morales x Female Reader Rating: 18+ / Heavy adult themes eventual smut. Trigger Warnings: Domestic Abuse, Mentions of death, PTSD, anxiety, mentions of police case, police.  Word Count: 

Note: Another heavy chapter, but things will let lighter as the chapters go on. Enjoy the first half of the beach day. 

Tag List:@qytyy @winter-fox-queen​​​​ @sherala007​​​​@inkededucatednnerdy @quica-quica-quica​​​ @hnt-escape​​​ @giizhkens-cedar​​​@heythere-mel​​​ @toomanystoriessolittletime​​

The ride passed in comfortable silence, the three of you listening to the radio and Lucy looking out the window at the cars in the next lane. All Frankie could think about was how nice it was to have someone else there to spend the day. He knew Lucy must have been feeling the same way, since he hadn’t seen her so excited about a beach trip in a long while. 

He appreciated how patient you were with her; it was something he noticed even on that first day. The way you refused help until you knew she was alright. That moment had stuck with him more than anything else. 

The memory of what Will said earlier surfaced in his mind. He shifted in his seat and glanced at you. Yes, you were beautiful. Strikingly so. A woman who could walk into a room and turn every head in the place; both men and women alike. Of course Frankie had been taken with you. He tried to suppress it, scolding himself whenever he was alone in bed at night and found his thoughts wandering.... 

His only goal right now was to be your friend because he cared for you and knew that you needed help. He wasn’t sure what kind of help, but he sensed that you were alone and at some point in your life something very bad had happened to you. He wouldn’t pry though, he would wait until you were ready to share. 

-

The beach wasn’t too packed; it was still early in the season and  the tourists hadn’t moved into their summer homes yet. The boys had done an oddly efficient job at setting everything up. When Ben and Will got into a little spat about how to sink the umbrella into the sand , Frankie simply rolled his eyes and continued to spray Lucy with sunblock. It made you laugh, they all seemed so comfortable with one another. 

The day was hot and everybody seemed eager to get into the water, everyone except you and Frankie.  You had bought a bathing suit at the store, intending on going in... but somewhere during the car ride you changed your mind. 

“You can go in if you want,” you told Frankie “I don’t mind just watching.”

He shrugged, “I don’t normally go in either.”

Then just like that the two of you were suddenly alone, both woefully unprepared for any sort of conversation.

You thought of something quickly, filling the silence “the marina was packed today.”

“Yeah, It’s always like that on memorial day. Most of the summer too, be prepared for the restaurant to start getting busy.”

“I prefer it that way. It makes the shifts go faster. So I’ve been meaning to ask, what exactly do you do? I assumed you owned the marina?”

He paused for a moment. “Uh, technically I do. It was a wedding gift from my parents. An uncle had died and left it to them. I think they just wanted to get rid of it, but I have an office manager that does all the upfront stuff….. normally I just work on repairs.”

Married. That wasn’t what you were expecting, but still no ring. “Did you go to school for that?”

“Kind of. I had training for planes, but you would be surprised just how similar the two are.” You gave him a look. He glanced at you and laughed sheepishly. “What?”

“I’m sorry, did you say planes?”

“Yeah”

“You fix planes?”

He smiled and crossed his arms, trying to seem much cooler than he actually was. “I fly them too.”

“You fly pl-....do you take constructive criticism?”

He laughed, “Of course.”

“Lead with that next time.”

He looked at you skeptically. “How am I supposed to lead with that, exactly?”

“You say, hi my name is pilot Frankie …..” 

He shook his head, grinning. “Morales,” he informed you. 

“Hi my name is pilot Frankie Morales, nice to meet you.”

He played along, “but how will I know if people actually like me for me, or they just want me to take them for a ride in a plane?”

You shrugged “it's tough being a celebrity, I don’t make the rules.”

“Oh yeah, celebrity, that’s me,” he said sarcastically. 

You kicked at the sand with your foot. “Also I liked you before I knew you had the coolest hobby in the world. So, you know that you can trust me.”

He glanced over at you and immediately noticed your smile. He had seen you smile before, but they would never quite reach your eyes. This one, he could tell, was real. He opened his mouth to speak when, in the distance, a wave crashed and Lucy squealed with laughter. Both of you turned your heads to look.

“Will Lucy be okay out there?” you asked. She had on a life vest and was being supervised in the shallows by the rest of the adults. Santi was holding onto a boogie board Lucy used to keep herself up. 

“Yeah, I know they seem like idiots but they are good men.” Frankie reached into the cooler to grab a bee and popped the cap off with the bottle opener. “Do you want one?”

You shook your head, “No thank you, but I’ll take a water bottle if you have it.” He set his beer down in his cup holder and reached into the cooler again. The bottle was freezing cold when he handed it to you. Perfect for a sunny day.

You wiped the condensation off on your dress. “Can I ask you something? It’s okay if you don’t want to answer.”

“Yeah, sure,” he said, taking a sip of beer. 

“Lucy’s mom is she….? Are you two still….? I don’t mean to pry, I guess I’m just a little confused.”

“You and I both,” he said with a sigh. “I’m married but we are not together anymore, haven’t been for a few years.”

“Oh,” you said simply, not finding any clarification in what he told you. If anything, you had more questions, but you didn’t want to push. Besides, it didn’t matter anyway…. you couldn’t, you were married as well. “Does your family live in the area?”

“Nope, they live up north. Katie never really knew her family. She grew up in the foster system and was bounced around until she enlisted at eighteen. It’s just me and Lulu now, and the guys when they find the time to travel here.”

“I’m sorry,” you said honestly. “It must be hard not having your parents support.”

He shook his head and took another sip. “I expected it, even when I was younger, it seemed as though they were only interested in keeping me alive.” He looked down and started to peel off the sticker on the bottle as he spoke. “They are both doctors, mom is an archaeologist and dad an engineer. He actually helped design parts of the international space station…. I think they valued their careers more than anything else... they still do. The only time they ever came down to see Lucy was right after she was born, aside from that it’s usually a phone call on a holiday and a card with money in the mail.”

Although he tried to play it off as if it were just another part of life, you could see that it still affected him deeply. For a moment you thought about reaching out to take his hand, but you stopped yourself. “It really is their loss, they are missing out on two wonderful people.”

Frankie adjusted the baseball cap on his head, a sheepish little smile playing on his lips at the compliment. “Well, thank you. Lucy and I could say the same thing about you. You’re great with her.”

You glanced back at the little girl. She was smiling happily as Ben pulled her along on the boogie board. “I think little girls need to be protected, but not only that - they need to be seen and heard. She is already so independent and fierce. I can see how you encourage her to be her own person and not fit into any one mold. That’s important for little girls to learn.”

He laughed, “Yeah, she definitely gives me a run for my money, that's for sure. She can already repair an engine better than most men I know.”

A large gust of wind came through and took hold of the multi-colored beach ball beside you. Both you and Frankie sprang from your seats to race after it. The thing was fast, and you could not stop it from crashing into the waves. You noticed just how much cooler it was near the water’s edge. Although the temperature outside was sweltering, the Atlantic still held that winter chill. Both of you stared at the ball as it bobbed up and down with the tide. 

Frankie waved it away with his hand and squinted in the sunlight. “It’s fine, it’ll probably just float down the beach to another family or something.”

You smirked at him “or choke a poor dimwitted sea turtle to death.”

He paused and shot you a pretend glare, then took off his hat, dropped it in the sand and reached for his shirt. 

You giggled “no, no I’m joking. I got it.” You said, starting to strip down to your bathing suit also.

“Well, you gotta be faster than that,” he said, half jogging to the water.

You slipped off your dress easily and ran straight past him into the waves. Frankie was not far behind. You two were pushing against the tide as you reached for the ball. Fingertips just barely brushed against the plastic before it slipped a couple more inches away. This left just enough time for Frankie to swoop in and grab it.

Your stomach hurt from laughing so hard “hey!”

He shrugged, “I’m sorry that I care more about the environment than you.”

You splashed him with water playfully.

-

The two of you swam for another fifteen minutes, chatting about the town and volleying the ball back and forth. Frankie pretended not to see the way the droplets of water clung to your skin and sparkled under the sunlight. When he noticed the little lace pattern on the bottom of your swimsuit, he knew he had been staring for too long and forced himself to look away. The very last thing he wanted to do was scare you away, or make you believe he had some sort of ulterior motives to helping you. 

You both dressed again before walking back up to the chairs. When the two of you returned, the group had already come back from swimming. They were passing around Tupperware full of fruit while Santi was starting up the tiny little grill he had brought. 

“You guys really don’t play around for beach days,” you mentioned to Frankie. 

“I tried to warn you,” he said with a smirk. 

Will had Lucy thrown over his shoulder, carrying her easily with one arm. “Has anyone seen Fry?”

“I’m right here!” Lucy’s little voice drifted out from behind him.

Will started turning, pretending to look for her “Fry! Fry! Where are you!”

Lucy was hardly able to speak through her fit of giggles, “I’m behind you!”

He put her down on the sand, pretending as if he had seen her for the first time. “Jesus Fry! You scared me!”

“Lulu,” Frankie said, “come here so I can put more sunscreen on you.” Frankie took the bottle from the bag and sprayed her again, making sure to get her ears and the tops of her feet as well. He sprayed some in his hands, and Lucy scrunched up her nose as he applied it to her face.

Watching the two of them together made you smile. You were reminded again just how different Frankie was from your husband. David would have felt emasculated by having to take care of a child. If he had attended today, you would be sitting beside him silently the entire time, only getting up to fetch him a beer.

“Do you want some?” Frankie asked, and you were suddenly snapped right back to reality.  

Even though you weren’t threatened by a burn yet, you figured it would be a good idea. “Yeah, thank you.” You offered him your arms, then the front of your legs.

“I used to be terrible with remembering sunblock until I got sun poisoning in Iraq, god never again.”

“Iraq?” you asked, and turned so he could get the backs of your legs.

“Yeah, with the air force” he told you, assuming you already knew. 

Breath hitched in your throat as he brushed your hair over your shoulder. You cringed at the feeling of the warm sunscreen hitting the back of your neck and jerked away. It was enough for the others to notice. You laughed and lied quickly “damn horse flies hurt when they bite. They say you should wash off the bite with soap to get it to stop the swelling. Is there a bathroom here?”

You sounded believable. Becoming an expert liar had been the only thing keeping you alive for so long. 

Frankie felt horrible. He didn’t quite know what he had done to trigger you, but he knew it was something. “It’s pretty far, I can walk with you-”

You shook your head, a wide smile still plastered across your lips. “Nope, I just need a direction.”

Santi jumped in quickly. “That building when we first came in, near the tennis courts.”

You nodded and started forward, tears stinging at the corners of your eyes. Why was this happening right now? You were fine a moment ago and now you felt as though you couldn’t catch your breath. You shivered, remembering the feeling again and putting your hand on the back of your neck to stop it.

A soldier…. it made sense. You were too stupid to have seen it, the nicknames and the holiday...... 

Thankfully, they were single stall restrooms; you pulled the door shut and locked it behind you. The bottom of the floor was disgusting and filled with wet sand. You lifted yourself up onto the counter and sat, trying to calm down. A soldier, a soldier, you kept repeating to yourself. It was too similar. The anger, the potential for violence…. just like your husband. 

You placed your head in your hands, and suddenly you were back in New Jersey. It was a bitter February, snow still on the ground. You were in your bathroom hiding as David raged in the living room and screamed at his coworker on the phone. A little boy had been killed by his father weeks ago. David was assigned to the case. When the trial came, the jury found the man innocent and let him walk free, even though all the evidence pointed to him as the killer. It was an embarrassment to David and the entire homicide unit

“God fucking dammit, y/n! y/n!”

You pulled yourself up on shaking legs, straightened your dress and walked out. David was red in the face waiting for you. “I thought I told you to call Comcast, did I not?”

“They said that they could get someone out here Wednesday because of the snow-”

He took the television remote and threw it at you as hard as he could; he aimed for your face but it hit your shoulder instead. The plastic connected straight with your collarbone. You doubled over in pain, holding it as it throbbed. He stalked up to you and you moved back, the fear evident in your eyes.

His voice was teetering on the edge of lunacy as he screamed at you.

“I give you a simple fucking job to do and you can’t even get it done. You’re a lazy fat fucking bitch.” he shoved you hard but you manged to keep standing. “Spend all day sitting on your fucking ass while I have to go to work for the both of us! I need the television because I need to see the news coverage of the fucking case! You knew this! Or would you like me to get fired and the both of us live on the fucking streets!” He shoved you again, and you fell against the stone fireplace. Your hands came up to shield your face as he picked up the remote and hit you with it repeatedly. It caught your lip, busting it open. 

You didn’t care about the blood, all you could think about was the gun still holstered in his belt. You got the television fixed the next day-

“Summer?” 

You stood quickly and wiped away the tears from your cheeks, pretending like nothing was wrong. “Yeah?”

“Are you alright?” 

It was Frankie. 

You shook your head and smiled in the dingy plastic mirror in front of you. “Yeah, why?”

He could hear that you had been crying. He pushed on the door but it was locked. 

You didn’t like that at all; you slipped off the counter and sat on the floor, against the door. Bracing it closed with your body “I’m fine-”

“You’re crying-”

“No, I’m not I- I get allergies and that horsefly hurt. I am such a baby I’ve always had a low pain tolerance-”

“If it’s something that I did -”

“Nope, it’s nothing that you did. I’m fine, I’m really, really fine I promise. I just got overwhelmed and needed some air. I’ll be back in a few minutes, and you guys can eat without me. Don’t let me hold you up.”

Frankie wasn’t convinced, but he didn’t want to force anything. “Would you like me to save you a plate?”

“Yes, please.”

You could hear his footsteps start to retreat and relaxed a little. 

“Summer?”

“Yeah?”

Frankie was about to say something, but he thought better of it. He figured it was better to let you have your space now.

[wandsandwheezes]

Family Man | F. W

TW // mentions of prem kids, pregnancy, children but mostly pure fluff

Taglist ✨ @witch-and-a-half @weasleysflowr @hufflepuffgirly @theweasleysredhair @wand3ringr0s3

If you asked Fred Weasley what his pride and joy was, people would usually expect him to beam proudly about the success of the shop with his brother, nevertheless, when he smiles fondly and says 'Thea Weasley' people are more often than not surprised.

Fred loved his Daughter so much that words couldn't describe how much happiness filled his heart every time he saw her. The second she was born, she had him wrapped around her little finger, a father that would do anything for her.

When you and Fred married, you were quick to fall pregnant with your first child, a Daughter, named after your Mother but the absolute spitting image of her father, however her soft strawberry blonde locks curled into ringlets, a trait that seemed to sprout as soon as her hair was long enough.

"How're my girls doing?" Fred whispers, pulling off his jacket, having just walked in from a day at the shop. You're sat with your daughter nestled into your side, about an hour or so deep into a nap. Fred gently scoops her up, not before pressing a small kiss to your forehead with a sweet hello, her little arms instinctively wrapped around his neck, falling back asleep instantly.

He took her up to her bed, tucking her in underneath her covers before pressing a gentle kiss to her hair, "goodnight my sweet angel, sleep well"

"I wish she'd stop growing," He says, joining you on the sofa, allowing you to cuddle into his side, his hands moving to play with your hair as he kicks off his shoes. "one day I'll wake up and my little girl will be an adult."

Laughing gently, you trace circles on his chest, feeling relaxed against him, you reminice of the moments you'd had together as teenagers, talking like this about your futures, getting married, how many kids you'd wanted and how you'd both give anything to do all of that with each other.

"Unfortunately Freddie, all they do is grow," You move to press a kiss to his cheek, nuzzling your nose into his neck for warmth, causing him to wrap his arms even tighter around you.

Little did you know that day, you were already pregnant with your second & third weasley children - the twins, like their father but one boy and one girl, Lee and Winnie. Identical apart from the eyes, the girl like her fathers and the boy much like yours, both with signature weasley hair.

Not even a few months after the twins you found out you were having another son, Billy who looked much like his uncle Bill did as a child, as Molly had pointed out hence his name. You originally wanted to call him Jamie but when you met your little boy for thr first time, both you and Fred decided that Billy was definitely more fitting.

finally your youngest daughter, Arabella. She was a gift that none of you had expected, after some complications after having Billy, you didn't think that having another child would be on the cards again. You found out you were pregnant a week or so before Fred's Birthday you had taken test after test, and even a trip to St Mungos to make sure, but as your doctor assured you, Arabella was on her way.

The thing about little Bella was that she was a tiny baby, a premature birth. When she was born she was so fragile looking and hearing her cries broke Fred's heart. The doctors said that she was quite frankly a miracle, making her just another pillar of pride for your adoring husband.

Having five children with Fred was an interesting experience, the house grew louder and louder and soon became like a second Burrow, children in and out of the house, magic everywhere. It truly was reminiscent of both of your childhoods. Despite having all the children to look after, he loved all of them with his whole heart and nothing less.

Your kids loved loved going to see Fred's parents and getting to spend time with Uncle George and Uncle Ron it was heart-warming to watch your family love the people you chose to be your family. Winnie absolutely adored being around Ginny and Lee wanted nothing more than to be like his Uncle Harry.

When Thea's Hogwarts letter came, Fred genuinely thought he was going to have a heart attack, "Merlin, Y/N, my little girl isn't old enough to be going to Hogwarts!" he was sat across the table from you eating his lunch, The sounds of Lee and Winnie bickering as Billy quietly draws and Arabella sits in your lap, listening into the conversation. To you, you were watching your babies grow up right before your eyes but to Fred they were always his babies.

"Freddie, my love it'll be the twins next, Lee wont shut up about getting to see Uncle Harry at school." you laugh, playing with the little curls on Arabella's head, a trait inherited from her oldest sister, "give it four years and our Bella will be off on her first year at Hogwarts with all of her siblings."

"I don't even want to think about that, I really don't know how Mum did it, sending us off one by one." you laugh lightly looking at your husband with a small smirk, "From what i heard from Molly, she was all but kicking you onto the platform, apparently you and George were a nightmare"

"We so were not!" he defended, feigning fake offense, rolling his eyes and taking a bite from his sandwich. "I think we were absolute golden angels" you raise an eyebrow at him, shaking your head, "You can be a golden angel and take Thea with you to Diagon Alley tomorrow to get her supplies, I don't fancy a day trip to London with the whole weasley clan just yet!" you laugh, he nods finishing up his food, the plate finding it's way to the sink, being washed up magically like at the Burrow, he presses a kiss to your hair, heading quickly to step into his father shoes, only to break up the growing argument between the twins.

You sat, content in the family you created, praising your younger self for putting up with all of Fred's antics because really, you were the luckiest girl on earth, with the greatest man alive, a loving father and the best Husband.

The time came to send Thea off on the Hogwarts Express, Molly had agreed to look after the rest of the children as you sent off your oldest, you were crying with fred as you hugged your little girl goodbye before she got onto the train. "Remember, Thea, it doesn't matter what house you get put in, and if you need someone to help you, you find Ted or Uncle Harry and they'll help you out." she laughs, wrapping her arms around her father's neck giving him a long hug. "I'll be fine, Dad, after all, I've got the weasley name to live up to!" he smiles proudly at his daughter, i give her one last kiss, giving her a couple of galleons for the train, "I love you, Thea." she hugs me again, "Love you too, Mumma!"

"One down, Four to go." you joke, leaning into your husband's side as you wave the train off, "At least the twins will have each other and Thea next year, the poor girl is all on her own!" you shake your head, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "I'm sure she's already made friends, she's much like you when it comes to being outgoing..." he smiles, calming down a little, "I can't believe we've just sent our first off to Hogwarts." you hug him gently. "Neither can I, Freddie, neither can I."

[mk-wizard]

Big Hero 6 The Series: It could have been better

Hello, friends. Today, I will be analyzing a TV series based on a movie that I fell in love with for its colourful themes, deep plot, compelling characters, great CGI and memorable messages. Before I get into it, I want to take a moment to say that I have quit doing videos. They are too big of a pain in the petunia to make and I write better than I speak, so I will stick to writing essays, reviews and more. Anyway, onto the analysis.

All I can say about Big Hero 6 the series is that it had a great concept, it presented some great ideas and tried hard to be a cartoon of the times, but it could have and should have been a lot better. The show’s downfall all centers around trying too hard to be kid friendly which makes the shame sting all the more because Big Hero 6 was already kid friendly even with its dark themes, sharp edges and intelligent writing. If anything, even the brightest kid friendly cartoons (Steven Universe, She-Ra, etc.) had those things and actually benefitted from them. By needlessly trying too hard, character development got scrapped, the edges were all smoothed out, storytelling was subpar, the humour was too silly and the executive meddling in the end produced a dismal final season. However, I don’t want this analysis to be one lengthy negative rant about how awful the series was because in its defense, awful is an unfair word. It did have potential and ideas which are worth carrying over to a reboot that I hope will be done someday in the future. Also, we should root for a reboot because Big Hero 6 would not be the first story that needs it before striking gold. Just look at how many times Spider-Man was rebooted in film before MCU found the version that worked. Anyway, I will list all the things in Big Hero 6 that could have been better in my opinion;

1- Go easy on the laughs and be more generous with the action. - I love adding comedy to my own writing because I think a good sense of humour makes everything better, but Big Hero 6 is not a stand up comedy routine. It is a superhero story where we expect action, suspense and life or death situations that are to be taken seriously first. The comedy should be for relief and with the right timing. Also, the chibi cutscenes and having characters act like fools aren’t funny. Ren and Stimpy are the exception not the standard and their way of making you laugh doesn’t fit an action series. In a show as big as Big Hero 6, real life physics and danger matters.

2- Make the villains menacing and gritty. - I admit that after having a movie villain like Yokai who was the stuff of nightmares, it is going to be a challenging act to follow, but it was obvious that the writers were trying especially with some villains who could have easily gone into some dark relatable territory. For example, Mr. Sparkles (the gentleman in the photo above) embodies social media and Internet personalities. Right off the bat, you have a long list of things which embody the dark side of that like scams, fraud, using social media to dox or harass, driving people to suicide, online predators, the Internet personalities being very depressed people in real life, and much more horrifying things. When you stop and look at it, Mr. Sparkles even looks like the Joker which hints how dark and scary he could have been if the stops were removed. The same goes for enemies like Hardlight who embodies online gaming, Liv with cloning, Obake an amoral and insane scientist, and Trina and Noodle Burger Boy (more on him later) being evil robots. Globby especially should have been painted and written in much darker colours rather being played off for laughs because he has many parallels with Clay Face. The only two villains who I can say were supposed to be campy, charming and comical were Baron Von Steamer and Supersonic Sue because they were a satire of the Adam West style villains.

The rest of them needed to be dark and threatening including Mr. Sparkles. In fact, I would love a rebooted version of Mr. Sparkles who gives me the heebie-jeebies. Going back to Noodle Burger Boy, I must confess that I was actually excited when I heard that he was going to be the main villain of the final season because I thought he was going to fulfill his master’s final wish and as a reminder, Noodle Burger Boy was based on a super robot for military purposes.

It would have been fantastic if Noodle Burger Boy was upgraded into a full military war machine with a new threatening look. For that, I think all of the villains deserve to be rebooted and have their full potential unlocked for better or for worse.

3- A show about geniuses merits genius level art quality. - I am usually forgiving towards art styles, but in the case of Big Hero 6, the oversimplified style with minimal details and lack of textures did not suit the show. The characters blend in with the background which makes them look flat and the special effects were extremely dulled down. I also know for a fact that Disney can do a lot better than this because I saw how superbly Tangled the Series was drawn.

You can see and almost feel the difference in quality, the number of layers and level of detail between the two styles. I think there was no excuse Big Hero 6 was not done in the same style and at the same level if not better as Tangled.

3- Don’t dumb down or flanderize amazing characters. - I absolutely detest it when characters are flanderized because it makes them one dimensional and grating. For example, Go Go is tough as nails and extremely calm, but she is not cold or hesitant towards helping her friends. She doesn’t require very special episodes for us to know that. If anything, the movie version of Go Go reminded me a lot of Garnet in how she deconstructed the broody character. She isn’t cold or emotionless. Just calm and mature. Another good example was how Honey Lemon was rewritten to be overly positive to the point of toxicity, naïve and oblivious with a juvenile obsession with stickers. Then you have poor Fred who was rewritten to be an incompetent fool. The spark that makes Big Hero 6 shine is that they are a team of geniuses meaning they are all intelligent. Even Fred is genius in his own way just not a scientific one. He has a vivid imagination, he is resourceful and can get himself out of tight spots. Please, don’t turn characters into dummies especially if their intelligence is a part of them. It doesn’t make them better or funnier. It ruins them.

4- Tadashi needs closure and honour. - I am all for Hiro making peace with the loss of his brother, but Tadashi is to the Big Hero 6 team what Uncle Ben was to Spider-Man. His loss was the catalyst if not the reason. He should never be forgotten. Moreover, there was never any true closure to him especially with the possibility that he may still be alive up in the air. After all, like Callaghan, his body was never found and it turned out that Callaghan was still alive.

With that said, who is to say that Tadashi was not secretly still alive and just hiding or being hidden? This is something that Disney really needed to clear up if not for the fans, then at least as a service to such an important character. Never just forget about them.

5- The format can only be episodic with a deep plots, continuity and character development. - Random episodes with a mere monster of the day is an outdated format which doesn’t fit Big Hero 6′s modern and bright setting. In seasons 1 and 2, when the episodes were plot heavy with character development, the series shined brightest. It also helped move the story along, but with the final season, plot was removed, closure was abandoned or poorly written if any was given, and characters were disallowed from growing. A good example at how plot and character development could have made this series and its characters better was the relationship between Hiro and Megan. Would it have truly survived or would they have broken up?

Would Richardson Mole have eventually lost interest in his obsession with besting and bullying Fred or would his obsession consume him compelling him to become a super villain? I do see quite a few similarities between Mole and Reverse Flash.

Then you have Karmi who is in my opinion, the biggest wild card of the bunch. She was intentionally introduced as an arrogant, prickly and unlikable yet complex character who rivaled Hiro bitterly.

Yet had a huge crush on his alter ego and as time went on, started to grow up and even form a friendship with Hiro. What would have happened further down the road with her? Would she have become a super hero herself? Or maybe even another love interest for Hiro kind of like how Black Cat is for Spider-Man?

Is Obake really gone?

What does the future hold Diana (Liv’s clone), Liv herself or the Sycorax the genetics company?

Is Alistair Krei going to become an ally to Big Hero 6 or an antagonist? There is also the issue at how little we know about the other Big Hero 6 characters other than Fred, Hiro and Baymax. What are Honey Lemon, Wasabi and Go Go’s backstories? These questions matter and while not every mystery can be solved, leaving none of them solved is lazy writing.

6- Executives, kindly stay out of the writing and any other part of the creative process. - I’m sorry, execs, but there is no nice way to say it. History itself proves that every time executives got involved in the creative process of any media, it got worse not better. Leave the writing to the creative team and the execs should only handle the legal stuff. Please. We understand that TV is a business, but writing itself is not. It is an art which you just don’t have a talent for. Let the creative people do their thing with the freedom necessary and you do your thing, deal? Deal.

7- Focus on Hiro and Baymax. - The are the main characters so keep them at the heart of the series no matter what happens around them. That is all I can say.

And that sums up all the things that could have made Big Hero 6 the series better, but this is all just my opinion. What is yours?

PS: I am well aware that the Big Hero 6 series is being retconned because a new series called Baymax is in the works as well as the long awaited sequel to the first movie. I am looking forward to both with an open mind. PPS: I also am aware that some people liked this show the way it was including the art style and I am cool with that. An analysis for art that includes cartoons is never right or wrong. It is solely based on opinion. I may have thought this series could have been better, but there are people who make arguments that it could have been worse.

[ps-i-dont-even-know]

Devil may cry headcanons

You know I wasn't expecting you put a lot of Kyrie stuff in this one but I couldn't help it. Also there's dadgil in here because I really love it, sorry for no young Dante and Vergil I'm running out of ideas since I can't remember most of my childhood. Also for those who are interested, I’m thinking of starting taking request/ask for headcanons and writing, possibly drawing but their not the best, but I need to work stuff out at the moment.

Sometimes when Vergil has a mission near Nero and Kyrie, he stops by their house

The first time he did this was shocking to Nero, not only was Vergil there, but V and Urizen was there too, and it was going to be extremely ridiculous to explain this to Kyrie

And he knew how this was go and how she is protective over Nero since losing her brother and nearly losing Nero.

"Nero, who's at the... door", " Oh, um Kyrie I would like to introduce you to my dad, er … Dads?", "Your, Dads?", "Look its complicated and a long story, anyway this is my main Dad, Vergil, he's kind of nice but doesn't really talk that much. This is my dad's human half, V, he's nice, likes poems and has animals, strange one that is. And lastly is my dads demon half, um I'm not sure if he's nice or not since he raised the demon tree", "Oh that's nice, by the way which one was the one that hurt you", "Wait, Kyrie, No!"

Nero has to hold Kyrie back from trying to attack Vergil, mostly for her safety. Of course she doesn't forgive Vergil at first, because of what he has done and while she gives off a nice demeanor, her glares and scowls are anything buy warm and welcoming. Which Vergil approves of Kyrie dating Nero, having someone who will fight for you instead of turning tail when something bad happens

After a while Kyrie finally forgives Vergil, because she shouldn't hold grudges that are already in the past, and to move on. But she does tell him that if he were to do something like this again she would not hesitate to hurt him, and Vergil knowing that it would be impossible for her to hurt him agrees. And the tension is finally gone and she is more welcoming to him. Which is great for Nero's case since he felt like he was being smothered in between all their glaring and the tension.

Kyrie also makes apple pie when Vergil visits, since apples are one of his favorite fruits and because the one time he visit she made some for the orphans and she asked if he would like a slice and at first he said no, but soon gave in and had a slice, well maybe two or three but he wont admit to it.

He will also go grocery shopping with her when he has free time and Nero is busy, only to help find ingredients for new food Kyrie wants to try, and to get to know each other better.

On holidays when Vergil and Nero will help Kyrie cook some of the food. Sometimes Dante will try to sneak some sweets only for his hand to be hit by a spatula as Kyrie tells him, he needs to wait or he'll spoil his dinner. In which Dante's pouting, Nero and Nico are giggling, and Vergil is smirking.

Nero has Kyrie fix his jackets when he comes back from missions sometimes, normally he will tell her he doesn't want to put work on her, but she wants to do something nice for him. She also teachers Nero how to sew and stitch so when there are days she can't fix he can do it himself, which took a while but he got it down and not only does he fox his jacket but also helps make clothing for some of the kids, sure his stitching or sewing not the best but they love it nonetheless. Kyrie has also has sewn cat like ears on one of Nero jackets without him knowing until Dante was laughing at him, he chewed him out but still kept the ears on his hoodie because he likes it.

Kyrie got Nero into cooking and remodeling house shows, sometimes he’ll turn it on just to see how the house changed and kind of debated on doing it with their house. What surprised him was the time he came into the living room where the tv was and saw Kyrie watching crime investigator shows, saying she finds its interesting about how they solve the problems, which Nero also got into, along with most of the kids.

The kids will dog pile both Dante and Vergil, Dante loves it, play fighting with the kids and stuff. Vergil on the other hand he doesn’t expect it and isn’t used to the contact, so he gets stiff and weirded out.

Dadgil

He got a school suspension, because well doing his first judgement cut on an apple sitting on a desk while cutting the apple but also the desk was something he wasn't supposed to do, and also because there not supposed to bring weapons to school

Nero had brought the Yamato, Cerberus, Nevan, and Agni & Rudra to his school show and tell, because he want to knock the socks off the kids who brought in pets, toys, or food from a different country

Vergil was frustrated that he had gotten a call from the school that his son brought weapons to school and was being suspended because of it and was mad that Dante let the Nero bring the weapons to school in the first place because it was Dante’s day to take the kid to school and he was busy

He was proud that Nero had done a judgment cut for the first time even if it was tiny and told him not to do this again.

Nero technically has two dads. Vergil and V, he loves when V visits him because of his strange pets, and the way he acts, he's mysterious but kind and loves his poems

Nero will not sleep unless V or Vergil reads him something be it a poem or story, and will try to stay up when Vergil is out on a mission. Being read to helps Nero sleep

On that subject of sleeping, Nero has frequent nightmares. It might be something he has gotten from Vergil, but there will be times where Nero leaves his bed and walks to his dad's room asking if he can sleep in bed with him, and half awake Vergil will agree. Sometimes Vergil will softly sing to Nero because after his nightmares it takes him a while to get back to sleep, and god forbid if Dante heard him singing he knows that he will not let him live this down.

Nero wanted to learn an instrument because his dad knows how to play a violin, and his uncle knows how to play both the drums and guitar. Though the problem was he didn't know which one to go with, there was many to choose from, he kind of stuck with a trombone since it slides a lot and the style is kind of it is great, also he can get away with spitting on Dante.

Nero has only two fears, spirits/ghost and frogs. Its mostly Dante's fault for letting Nero watch paranormal horror movies at night. And Nero doesn't know why he is afraid of frogs, maybe its the way they look or something he doesn't know nor care.

When he was at the park with Nico and Kyrie, did his fear of frogs really show. They were over by the pond and Nico comes over to Nero with the frog in her hand, only for him to scream and start running, while Nico chase after him giggling. Kyrie was also giggling watching Nero run from Nico was too funny.

Nero also begged his dad and uncle for a pet, he didn't care what it was as long as its not a frog. Dante was close to getting Nero a hellhound or Cerberus, but Vergil literally had to stab smack some sense in his brother. They decided on ferret, they didn't want a cat or bird because V has one and they weren't sure if its territorial or not. Hamster and Guinea pigs are tiny and live I cates not much fun there same with Lizards. Dogs are a hassle and no one wants to clean up after it, so a Ferret is what they decided on.

Nero absolutely loves it and its a noddle he can wrap it around his neck and wiggle the creature. He decided on naming it Furret cause it looked like the Pokémon and he couldn't think of anything else

Every year for fathers day Nero will try and make Vergil something, he's make weird cup looking thing that you cant drink out of it because of holes, macaroni art, drawings, cards filled with glitter galore, paper hats, the list goes on and on. But he tried making those flower thing Dante makes, he asked him how he did it and Dante responds it comes to him naturally which doesn't help at all. So he tries only for nothing to appear to his disappointment, he tries and tries until he gets the tiniest and wimpy looking thing. But happily gives it to his dad who really appreciates it.

Vergil's refrigerator is covered with child like drawings given to him from Nero, he loves them and encourages Nero to do more and that he will be the greatest artist.

When Nero first met Patty was the same day Dante was given the mission to babysit her. She was kind of bratty and annoying at first and he didn't like that she would take all of Dante's attention. They argued a lot and Dante would yell at them to stop because it was giving him a headache and they should try to get along. After having to take Patty to retrieve her family money he did start to get along with her and they started to both annoy Dante together.

Nero absolutely loves dinosaurs and has loads of toys of them, and when he was going to the Zoo with Vergil he told him he was excited to see Dinosaurs there. Only for Vergil to tell them that there aren't any dinosaurs at the zoo. (This happened to a friend of mine).

Trish and Lady likes to take Nero out shopping, normally he doesn’t mind going with them, as long as he gets something out of it. Poor Dante and his debt when he finds out how much stuff they bough for Nero

Dante watching Nero while Vergil out can lead to many, many, different ways, and Vergil dreads all of them. Dante could feed Nero only sweets and junk food instead normal healthy food, Dante could probably lose Nero somewhere be it the park or his own damn shop, Dante could probably get Nero in danger because of the demons that show up to his shop and destroys it.

Nero does get into a lot of fights at school, half of them are kids making fun of him others are he’s a hard head and doesn’t let go of grudges. The school is very frustrated in how Nero always gets into these fights, but are nervous of his dad, because of his stubbornness and how he knows that half the time its not Nero’s fault. Like one time a teacher and Nero argued about how Demons do exist and how his dad, uncle, and two aunts go out and defeat. It resulted Nero getting embarrassed in front of the class and being sent to the office and a very angry Vergil that nearly killed the teacher.

[ibijau]

jin ling / oyzz 32 pls!! :3c ❤️ u!!

so blocked on other things that I’m finally getting back to my prompts yay

If there was one thing Jin Ling had learned early on, it’s that fate hates him. His familial situation is good proof of this, though it is his love life that makes it the most obvious.

At twelve, he developed a crush on a girl from another sect who was staying in Jinlin Tai as a guest disciple. She was about two years older than him, pretty as the sunrise on Yunmeng’s lake, and strong enough to break a fierce corpse’s neck with her bare hands. It took Jin Ling weeks to decide how to talk to her, and when he finally did, an enormous pimple appeared right in the middle of his nose, disfiguring him. Jin Ling tried every remedy he could buy to bring his face back to normal, but only managed to make things worse. He never had a chance to talk to that girl, and she soon returned to her own sect, leaving Jin Ling completely heartbroken and ready to swear he would never love again.

A few months later, at thirteen, Jin Ling fell in love with a Yunmeng Jiang disciple. He tried to impress the older boy by showing off his diving skills. It was a common game for his uncle’s disciples, and Jin Ling had played it often enough as well. He liked to think he was good at it. His uncle had said he was good at it! And yet when he tried to dive in a very cool way to impress that one Jiang disciple, Jin Ling hit his head against something and nearly drowned. After that, he refused to come again to the Lotus Piers for ages, not until his uncle dragged him away from Jinlin Tai and forced him to go to a rather ill fated Night Hunt that changed his life.

If Jiang Cheng hadn’t taken Jin Ling to Dafan Mountain, he wouldn’t have met Mo Xuanyu. If he hadn’t met Mo Xuanyu and been rescued by him, he wouldn’t have had a debt toward him and helped him run away from Jiang Cheng in Qinghe. If he hadn’t angered his uncle like that, Jin Ling wouldn’t have needed to lay low for a while, and he wouldn’t have stumbled upon a group of juniors from various sects. And then…

Then he wouldn’t have met Ouyang Zizhen.

Meeting Ouyang Zizhen had been both a blessing and a curse. Well. Mostly a curse, actually.

Jin Ling, fourteen, with a bad ego, an even worse temper, and about to be hit in the face by more family secrets than any fourteen years old boy ought to have dealt with, just didn’t need the added horror of being in love again. It really was unfair and needlessly cruel of Ouyang Zizhen to be just that perfect, and handsome, and eloquent, and kind, and…

For a good while, Jin Ling managed to keep himself under control. He had bigger things to worry about, such as not getting killed by Xue Yang, or not getting killed by fierce corpses, or not getting killed by his uncle, and also discovering that his family was an even bigger mess than he’d ever realised, which was really saying something. And yet even with all those much more important things to keep him busy, Jin Ling couldn’t stop thinking about Ouyang Zizhen’s smile, his heartfelt tears for that ghost girl in Yi-City, the fierce way he’d fought in the Burial Mounds, how he hadn’t hesitated to stand up for Wei Wuxian… and also how he had firmly sided with the Ghost General against Jin Ling.

It really was Jin Ling’s fate to be eternally unlucky in love, he’d thought after that. And then, when he’d learned what kind of men his uncle and grandfather were, he’d figured that maybe his bad luck was just so his family would end with him, and stop making a mess of things.

And yet, in spite of being clearly cursed with the worst luck in the world, a few weeks after suddenly becoming sect leader, Jin Ling had received a letter. Not just any letter, either, but an invitation to join some other boys on a Night Hunt, among which Ouyang Zizhen who had been the one writing that invitation. Jin Ling’s broken heart had mended on the spot, delighted to find that Ouyang Zizhen had thought of him for this. Considering their last interaction hadn’t been too great, it had to mean something if he was invited, right?

It took some effort to convince the Jin elders, but in the end Jin Ling was sect leader now, and so nobody could really stop him from going wherever he pleased. He flew as fast as he could after leaving Jinlin Tai, and arrived less than a day later at the residence of the Baling Ouyang sect where Ouyang Zizhen welcomed him with that beautiful smile of his.

“You arrived a little early,” Zizhen said as he guided Jin Ling inside. The Baling Ouyang sect wasn’t very big, nor was it very rich, so the place they lived in was not much when compared to Jinlin Tai. Yet because Zizhen was there, Jin Ling found that simplicity charming, and that smallness cozy. “My father has a guest with him,” Zizhen explained, “but they’ll be leaving to their own Night Hunt soon enough. Well, they say Night Hunt… mostly Yao zongzhu and him like to head out and find a nice place to drink without my mother and auntie Yao bothering them.”

Jin Ling grimaced. Sect Leader Yao wasn’t very high on the list of people he liked to deal with. Zizhen noticed his expression of course, and laughed.

“I know, I know,” he said, leading Jin Ling inside a reception room decorated with rustic charm. Or at least, so Jin Ling chose to call it. “Jin zongzhu, just wait here and…”

“You can call me Jin Ling.”

“Wouldn’t that be disrespectful?” Zizhen asked. “I imagine people already give you a hard time for being so young, I don’t want to be too familiar and undermine your authority.”

Jin Ling’s poor heart started beating faster in his chest. Ouyang Zizhen really was too perfect, kind, courteous, clever… Even other kids in Lanling Jin were sometimes making a fuss about using Jin Ling’s title, especially those older than him, but here was Ouyang Zizhen, worrying about his image!

“I don’t care what others think,” Jin Ling said with all the haughtiness of a teenager with too much power. “You are my friend, so you can call me as you like.”

“Then maybe Jin Rulan?” Zizhen suggested. “It would be less…”

“You can call me anything you like, except that,” Jin Ling promptly corrected.

“Ah. Well, Jin Ling it is then,” Zizhen said, giving in. “Listen, I do have to tell my father that you’re here, or he’ll be cross later. He’ll probably want to drop by, but I’ll do my best to make sure it’s short. And then… it’s still early, and I don’t expect anyone else to arrive until tomorrow, so we could try to have some fun in town together?”

Jin Ling eagerly nodded at that proposition. Time alone with Zizhen sounded like the best thing ever. If he played this right…

While Zizhen left to go see his father, Jin Ling started pacing the room, trying to plan a course of action for the evening. He didn’t know what they might end up doing, since he’d never spent any time in Baling before, but surely he could hazard a few guesses. They’d have to eat, for example, and Jin Ling would of course offer to pay. Zizhen might protest, being the host, but Jin Ling would use the rank card and treat the other boy to any and all delicacies could be found in these parts. And surely there were interesting sights to see, or a scenic place perhaps? If they could go walk somewhere pretty, then Jin Ling would just have to take Zizhen’s hand and…

Or would it be better to talk about his feelings before? Jiang Cheng always said it was better to be direct in those things, so there could be no misunderstandings. Of course Jiang Cheng was terminally single, so perhaps not the best example to follow. But directness had seemed to work pretty well for Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji in that temple in Yunping, so clearly there was a merit to that idea. But how to confess? Zizhen was an eloquent person with a poetic turn of mind, whereas Jin Ling… well, Jin Ling knew where his strength laid, and it definitely wasn’t in eloquence. It ran in the family, apparently.

On both sides.

It was fine though. There was no shame in having a practical turn of mind. When they were married, Zizhen would be eloquent in his stead, and Jin Ling would do the accounting, and they’d be a perfect team. For that reason, it made sense that his declaration should be a reflection of his personality: direct and to the point. He just needed to stay calm, find the right words, politely express his intentions, and everything would be fine.

Jin Ling just needed to keep his cool.

All things considered, he should have remembered that this was not something he’d ever been good at.

So when he saw the door start to open again, when he caught a first glimpse of Zizhen’s beautiful smile, of his elegant eyes, Jin Ling panicked.

“Zizhen, I like you a lot!” he shouted. “Please allow me to court you!”

Ouyang Zizhen froze on the spot, while the door finished opening, revealing sect leader Ouyang and sect leader Yao behind the teenager, both of them staring at Jin Ling in shock.

Realising what he’d done, Jin Ling nearly fainted.

This time his reputation was ruined for ever, and he was never going to live it down.

[hopelikethemoon]

The Addition (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}

Title: The Addition  Rating: PG-13 Length: 3000 Warnings: None. Notes: You can find the Maybe Today, Maybe Forever Timeline here. Set in March 1997. This is the pupper. This is just a everything-and-the-kitchen-sink chapter.  Summary: Reader finally gets what she wants. 

Taglist:  @grapemama​  @seawhisperer​ @huliabitch​​ @pedropascalito​​ @rogrsnbarnes​​@thewallpapergoesorido​​ @twomoonstwosuns​​ @gooddaykate​​ @livasaurasrex​​ @ham4arrow​​@hiscyarika​​ @plexflexico​​ @readsalot73​​ @hdlynn​​ @lokiaddicted​​ @randomness501​​@fioccodineveautunnale​  @roxypeanut​​ @just-add-butter​​ @snivellusim​​@amarvelousmandalorian​​ @lukesrighthand​​ @historynerd04​​@mrsparknuts​@synystersilenceinblacknwhite​​ @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead​​@exrebelshocktrooper​​@awesomefandomsunited​​ @ah-callie​​ @swhiskeys​​ @lady-tano​​ @beskar-droids​​ @space-floozy @cable-kenobi​​ @longitud-de-onda​​ @cool-ultra-nerd​​ @himbopoes​​@findhimfives​​ @pedrosdoll​​

“You’re lucky I’m homebound,” You remarked as you settled into the chair beside Javier in the little doggie playroom. “I’d be here every day trying to adopt another one.” 

“We haven’t adopted this one yet.” 

“She’s perfect.” You looped your arm through his, leaning towards him to rest your cheek on his shoulder. “I hope she loves us.” 

“A little younger than we intended to get.” He pointed out, looking down at the little information card the man had given him to review while they got the dog ready to visit with them. “Two is still a puppy.” 

“Two is a full-grown dog.” You took the card from him and looked it over. “She’s supposed to be great with kids and calm.” 

“Two is still going to require exercise.” Javier gave you a look, a brow quirking upwards. 

“I can sit outside and drink my tea and let her run around the yard.” You waved your hand dismissively, “That’s the reason we have Josie. She can help her burn energy.”

“Is that why we have Josie?”

You nodded. “It was all a scheme to get a dog. Lance shot down the idea of getting one in Colombia so I went through a multi-year plan to have a baby with you, move to Florida, all so I could get a dog.” 

Javier snorted. “I wouldn’t put it past you.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, rubbing his hand over your shoulders. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine.” You knew he was worried, but he was slowly driving you crazy with asking you how you felt every thirty minutes. Pass out once and end up in the hospital… 

The door opened and the young man who had been helping the two of you entered with the beautiful dog at the end of a red leash. “We’ve been calling her Sasha, but she doesn’t really respond to it.” He explained to you.

The dog was a little skittish at first, keeping close to — you think his name was Owen — as she sniffed at the floor. 

“She’s beautiful.” You smiled, leaning forward and holding out your hand. “Any idea what she is?”

“Most likely a mutt.” He explained. “She was an owner surrender. They got reassigned out of the country.”

“Poor thing.” You clicked your tongue against your teeth. “Come here, sweetheart.”

Javier was watching you, his eyes flickering between you and the dog. “Looks like a mountain dog.”

“With some poodle, most likely.” Owen offered. “She won’t get much bigger. The vet’s checked her out and she’s done growing.”

“Good.” Javier, ran his hands over his legs before he shifted forward and held out his hand, much the same way you were.

The dog tugged at the lead, seeming far more keen now that both of you were interested in her. 

“Is she house trained?” Javier questioned. 

“And doesn’t pull when she goes on a walk.” Owen let go of the leash, letting her sniff her way closer to the pair of you. 

“Come here, girl.” You cooed, your smile broadening as she bounded towards you. She shoved her cool nose against your palm, licking at you curiously. 

Javier reached out and petted her back. “You’re a soft girl, aren't you?”

She wagged her tail, flopping onto her side and showing her belly to both of you.

“I think she likes you.” You teased, nudging Javier in the ribs. You looked up at Owen, grinning. “I think she’s the one.”

“Easy there,” Javier told you. “Isn’t there more we should do?”

Owen shook his head. “If you feel comfortable with her, we can start the outtake paperwork.”

You looked at Javier, pursing your lips. “Please? I mean, I’m coming back and getting her Monday even if you say ‘no’.”

“I am not going to say ‘no’.” He huffed, rolling his eyes with a shake of his head. “Like I’m about to deny a pregnant woman what she wants.” He muttered under his breath. 

“I’ll stay with her, if you want to start on the papers.” You told Javier with a grin. 

“Alicia will help you at the front desk.” Owen told Javier. 

The dog jumped up when Javier stopped petting her, propping herself up to rest her paws on his knees. 

“I’m screwed.” Javier laughed. “There’s three of you pulling this look now.”

You chuckled heartily. “Pretty soon you’ll be outnumbered four-to-one.”

“I was outnumbered when it was just you.” He kissed your cheek before he scooted the dog off his legs and got up. “Thanks.” Javier patted Owen on the shoulder as he walked past and headed out to the front desk.

“You’ve got yourself a new home, pretty girl.” You told the dog, scratching behind her ear. She was the absolute doppiest dog, lolling her head to the side with her tongue hanging out. 

“Any ideas on names?” Owen questioned you.

You glanced up, “Stevie.”

“Like Nicks?”

“Yeah, actually.” You laughed, looking back at the dog. “Are you a Stevie?”

She barked softly. 

“None of that.” You scrunched up your nose, rubbing at her head. “Javi will kill us both if you’re a barker.”

“Only when she gets excited.”

“We have an almost four-year-old who is much the same.” You laughed softly, patting your knees. 

Stevie jumped up and put her paws on your legs, leaning up to lick at your face. “You’re just so loving, aren't you?”

“When are you due?” Owen questioned. 

“Mid-to-late May.” You answered, glancing up at him. “I know it’s crazy to get a dog right before having a baby, but… I’m desperate.” 

“Is he not around a lot?” He nodded his head towards the door. 

“He’s around all the time,” You shrugged. “I just want a dog.” You scratched behind both of Stevie’s ears. “You’re going to be spoiled rotten.” 

“Ah, I see.” Owen leaned back against the wall, folding his arms across his chest. “I was going to suggest I could help you train her, if you were lonely.”

Your eyes snapped up. “Are you trying to come onto me?” Your head tilted back and you laughed — loudly. “Kid, he and I could find a dozen and a half ways to kill you with the dog toys in this room alone. I’m flattered, but no.” 

Color flooded his face. “I wasn’t… I’m sorry.” 

The door popped open and Javier emerged, “Well, baby. You’re the proud owner of a dog.” 

“Did you hear that, Stevie? You’re going home with us!” The dog barked again excitedly, her tail thumping against the floor. 

 —————

 Stevie alternated between being stretched out on the backseat of the Jeep and bouncing back and forth to look out the windows.

“Didn’t he say she was calm?”

“She’s been cooped up in a kennel for who knows how long, Javi. Let her be excited.” You rolled your eyes at him, laughing quietly. “He also tried to hit on me while you were gone.”

“Excuse me?” Javier cocked his head to the side as he stopped at a light. “He did what?”

“I’m impressed that this,” You gestured to your stomach. “isn’t an instant detractor.” 

“I keep telling you, you look good.” He reached over and gave your knee a squeeze, fingers playing little patterns there. Some things never changed. “What’d you say?”

You caught his hand, bringing it to your stomach to stop the patterns he was drawing on your leg. “I told him I could kill him a dozen different ways.” 

“Baby!” Javier laughed, pushing his sunglasses up his brow. “You can’t just threaten to kill people.” 

“Has it ever stopped me before?” You questioned, sliding his hand to the spot where the baby was kicking. “I also said you’d kill him. I find murder tends to distract from attempts to hit on someone.” 

Javier rubbed his thumb over your stomach. “Someone’s excited.” You quipped, keeping his hand there as he started through the intersection. “You know, baby.” He clicked his tongue against his teeth. “I always thought your threats of violence were a turn on.” 

“Really?” You rolled your eyes. “That makes perfect sense with you, Javier.” You glanced over your shoulder to the backseat, pleased to see that Stevie had settled down. “I mean, we have established I’m a sadist.” 

“The truth comes out.” He reluctantly pulled his hand away so he could turn the corner. Once it was safe, he reached back over, letting you guide his hand back to the right spot. She had quieted a little, but that didn’t dissuade him from keeping his hand there. Just in case. 

“Thank you for agreeing to Stevie.” 

“You did get Josie in on the plan.” He quipped with a chuckle. “It’s all good, baby. After everything you’ve been through, you deserve a dog.” He gave her leg a squeeze, before gripping at the steering wheel. 

 ———

 “Like Uncle Steve?” Josie questioned as she laid on the floor, on her back, beside Stevie. You were pleased with how quickly the two had bonded with each other. One hour at home and Stevie was sprawled out on the floor beside her human-sibling. 

“Yep.” Javier confirmed with a nod as he cracked open a bottle of beer, taking a swig before he moved to join you on the sofa. “Just like Uncle Steve.”

“Technically, Stevie Nicks…” You corrected. “But mostly to torture Steve.” 

Monica laughed as she looked up from the book she was reading. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who named their dog to spite their best friend.” She looked at Javier pointedly.

“I don’t know what heinous lies the Murphys have fed you, but… I don’t know if I’d call him my best friend.” Javier protested with a roll of his eyes, sipping at his beer. 

“Ignore him.” You remarked, stretching out lengthwise on the sofa and stretching your legs over his. “We moved all the way to Miami just so he could hang out with Steve.” 

“Wait, really?” Monica’s brows rose upwards. “I don’t think you ever mentioned this in class.”

Javier dragged his hand over his face, before scratching at the back of his neck. “I knew it was a half-decent place to raise a family.” He squeezed your calf. “And I liked the prospect of Josie having a readymade friend in Olivia.”

“And Emily, daddy.” Josie reminded him, rolling onto her side to pet Stevie. She lifted her head, looking towards her. The dog sighed contentedly and shuffled on the floor closer to Josie. 

“Emily wasn’t here yet, Josie.” He took another swig of beer before he sat the bottle aside. “If I’d known Miami would be hot as fuck like Colombia—”

“Fuck!” Josie shouted, causing you to jerk upright, turning to stare at her. 

“Joséfina Selina Peña!” You raised your voice slightly and instantly regretted it when you saw Monica flinch in reaction to it. Stevie started barking, bouncing around confusedly as Josie scrambled towards the sofa.

“Mommy! I didn’t mean to say it.” Josie flashed you her best attempt at a charming grin. “I’m sorry mommy!” 

Javier picked her up and settled her onto the sofa between the two of you. “JoJo, you can’t be saying those words.”

She hid her face in shame. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, hey.” You played with her curls. “It’s okay, babydoll. I’m not mad. You just can’t be saying that.” 

“But daddy says it.”

You swatted him in the arm. “And he’s been told not to. Haven’t you, Javier?”

He rocked his jaw and sighed. “Yeah. Josie, you can’t say that, okay?”

“But why?”

“They’re grown-up words.”

“Like grown-up drinks?” She looked at you then. “Why don’t you drink grown-up drinks?”

“Because they’re bad for babies. Like you and your sister.” You rested your hand on your stomach. “I’m not mad at you, Josie. But we have a swear jar for a reason.”

“It sounded funny when daddy said it.” 

“Daddy shouldn’t have said it around you.” Javier sighed heavily and pulled Josie into his lap. “Try not to say it again, okay?” He kissed the top of her head.

“Okay.” Josie turned and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Can I please play with Stevie now?”

“Yes, baby. You can play with Stevie.” You leaned over and kissed her cheek, rubbing your nose against it. “Just watch your mouth.” 

She made a dramatic kissing sound as she returned the kiss. She wiggled out of Javier’s arms and moved to slide off the sofa. She crawled, on her hands and knees, towards Stevie who already seemed very amused. 

“You guys are good parents.” Monica remarked, looking between the two of you. “Josie and the baby are lucky to have perfect parents.”

Javier draped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side. “We’re certainly not perfect.” He squeezed your shoulder three times.

“We’re just two people trying to do right by our kids.” 

“Which includes you.” Javier told Monica, letting go of you so he could grab his beer, taking a drink. He crossed his leg over his knee and rested the beer on his ankle as he sank back against the sofa. 

Monica’s brows furrowed, “What?”

You laughed softly, patting Javier’s leg. “I decided that we’ve unofficially adopted you. Your parents might have brought you into the world, but we’re going to make sure you thrive in it.” 

She stared at you. “I really don’t deserve that.”

“You’re a good kid, Monica.” You smiled at her. “You deserve a good life.” 

“Thank you.” Monica rubbed the sleeve of her sweatshirt under her nose. “You’re going to make me cry again.”

Stevie jumped up suddenly and started barking. 

“Hush!” Javier clapped his hands, sitting his beer aside as he got up off the sofa. “What is it?” He questioned, kneeling down in front of Stevie. She bounced a little, barking again as the doorbell sounded. 

“I’ll get it,” You sighed, peeling yourself off the sofa and making your way towards the front of the house. You peered through the window, looking to see who was at the door. “Are you fucking kidding me?” 

Of course, it just had to be one of the moms from ballet. Javier was right, you were leaving that studio as soon as you got back out into the world. 

You pulled the door open, hands on your hips. “Can I help you Chelly?”

“Oh.” She laughed nervously, giving you a wary look. “I was just dropping off this beef casserole. Missy mentioned seeing Javier at the grocery store and I thought…” She tilted her head. “She made it sound like you weren’t up and about.”

You glared at the woman, “Missy is prone to overdramatizing situations.” 

“Baby, who is it?” Javier called out from the family room. Stevie was still barking and now, given from what you could hear, Josie had decided to join in. 

“Chelly.”

“Who?” He questioned. 

“From dance.” You called back to him, before you turned your attention back to the woman. God, these women needed a fucking hobby that was something other than chasing after Javier’s cock. “I appreciate the casserole, but Javier has dinner covered.” You fixed her with a faux-smile. “And I don’t eat beef.”

“You shouldn’t make him work so hard,” She told you with a tone that made you want to throttle her. “I’m sure he’d appreciate this casserole.” 

You pressed your tongue to the inside of your cheek, staring at her as you considered your plan of action here. You stepped out onto the brick stoop, pulling the door closed behind you. “I’m only going to say this one time, Chelly so listen. And you can take this back to your little friends and tell them what a horrid bitch I am.” You crossed your arms across your chest, “I know what you’re doing. You heard I was in the hospital — smelt blood in the water. This vulture act is going to stop. Now. If I catch another one of you sniffing around my family, I’m going to make you regret it.”

“It’s just a casserole—”

“It’s not.” You snapped, fingers curled into fists. “I’m not an idiot.” You narrowed your eyes. “I didn’t put up with six years of bullshit working for the DEA to put up with this shit from a bunch of high strung, horny, dance moms.” 

“I don’t—”

“I guess I should thank you,” You said snidely, a slight smirk playing over your lips. “Last time I saw you, you thought you were clever by insinuating that Javier was fucking his students.” Oh, the irony of the current situation. “It inspired a rather fun afternoon fuck for us. So thanks, Chelly.” 

She looked mortified and it really only seemed to fuel you. 

“So take your casserole and fuck off.” 

Chelly started to say something, but you were quick to cut her off. 

“I don’t want to hear your voice” You snapped, taking a step forward. The door opened behind you and you turned around to meet Javier’s eyes. “I have it handled.” 

“Alright, baby.” He said with a faint smile, before he closed the door back.

You looked back at Chelly. “Why are you still here?”

“I’m… so sorry.” 

“Yeah, it’s a little late for that.” Your brows rose upwards. “And tell your friends they can fuck off too.” With that you, headed back inside — nearly crashing into Javier who had been, unsurprisingly, waiting right on the other side of the door. “Hi.”

“You’re a fucking force, baby.” He grinned at you, that look of sheer adoration making your heart ache in the best of ways. 

“We don’t have to deal with them anymore.” You told him with a resolute nod. “Where are the kids?”

“Monica took Stevie and Josie out back.” He grinned at you, “Did you really just tell her to fuck off?”

“This door is surprisingly thin, apparently.” You laughed as you stepped towards him. You reached up, tracing your fingers over his cheek and the soft scruff there. “Yeah. I did. It was pretty spectacular. She might cry in her minivan.” 

Javier leaned down and kissed you. “I love you.” 

You brushed your nose against his. “Right back at you, babe.” 

[castleofclouds]

7 Days A Week.

Genre ; Fluff, Slice of Life, Humor

Warning ; I'm writing this in the middle of midnight and I'm trying my best to used my last brain cells.

Summary ; A Story About you (fm reader), and your 7 dorks!

Part 1 ; Nostalgia.

Today is a normal day, nothing too different than the yesterday, except the way you started isn't by cliche way in which another character would wake up at exactly 7 AM in the morning to go to class.

Nope, you weren't doing that!

In fact, you are on your bed lying down, actually not really on top of your bed, kinda like a tent that was make with a blanket and pillows build just for the eight of you.

Yup! It's a slumber party! Surprise! How is it? Isn't it great to start it with a slumber party?

Anyway that...

"Can you stop talking?" Jeno said, currently getting irritated by how the narrator never stop telling things.

"Yeah! Like we don't need to hear it just get the spotlight down here!" Renjun remarks.

Those bastard! Anyway since the narrator felt attack I will leave it to you, take care of it.

"This is much more better!" Haechan exclaimed, feeling relief after the narrator leave.

The story telling was just too much for him.

"Anyway, how's you guys been doing?" You asked trying to change the topic.

"We been doing things that you do, except we are doing it our own way." Jisung said, being sarcastic as he should, Jaemin gasped.

"Did this baby just insulted someone?!" He overreacted, trying to tease Jisung.

"Can we stop with the baby joke? It's becoming to boring." Jisung said, even though he doesn't want that to stop, he love getting attention.

Tsundere.

"Shut it!" He shouted to the narrator at the corner of the room.

"We've been playing things like jenga and even that penguin escape." Renjun explains showing all the jenga and the penguin escape game being left alone in the corner of the tent.

"We should play something to take care of our boredom.." Mark sighed, he gets bored sometimes, but sometimes he doesn't understand how he is already 20 still love to make a tent and playing a card game, pretty sure he's just childish.

Seeing his child, Jaemin come up with a solution, it's sound like there's a lamp effect going around on top of his head.

"Aha! I got an idea!" He chirped happily, the 7 pair of eyes are lit by it.

"What is it?" You ask excitement going around your eye, you can't help it.

"Yeah yeah what is it?" Chenle said as excited as you, he hold your hands the both of you waiting for the great idea that Jaemin has.

"How about we talk about our high school life?" He said, thinking that it was the best idea he ever had.

Renjun sparkling eyes losses it's spark, now he's ready to throw some hands.

Poor boy was so happy, and either Chenle, he just want some fun, what should he hope for? It's Jaemin, Jeno best friend pretty sure Jeno teach him how to be a boomer like him.

"Seriously?! Are you being serious now?" Renjun said, getting annoyed.

Jaemin tilted his head, he thought it was a great idea, sadly not much people in here understand his efforts.

"Fine! Then come up with something nice!" He exclaimed, then Haechan start to act as if he's Sherlock from Sherlock's Holmes books series.

"Hmm... How about we talked about embarrassment that we had back in high school!" He shouted, giving his almost the same kinda idea that Jaemin just gave.

Jaemin was ready to complain how his idea sounds just like him but then he heard a lot of agreement going around.

"Not you to Jeno!" He said disbelieved how Jeno was quick to betray him.

He should have thought much before he make a deal with all of this dumbass.

"I'm sorry Jaemin, but Haechan Idea seems very interesting!" Jeno said, Jaemin felt the urge to choked his friend but he try to calm.

He isn't Renjun who are always thirst by blood and will always be the one who ready to pick a fight, he had an image and he need to keep doing it, because it's his Ninja Way! As in Naruto.

"Jaemin everyone can hear you thoughts." Renjun said, which made the boy flustered.

"Sorry, my bad." He said, excusing himself to the toilet feel ashamed.

"You don't need to go, we just start the story." You said, didn't want Jaemin to miss any of the great story that are waiting to unfold.

Jaemin who found out that you cared a lot about him, move pass Haechan who previously sit next to you.

"Hmm.. YN finally give me the attention that I deserved!" He exclaimed exclusively, while cling onto your arm like there's no tomorrow.

You pushed his head a little bit, you don't really like skinship, you are fine with some of them, but sometimes Jaemin way of affection is too much, let alone Jisung who had to endure it everytime he met Jaemin.

"How is it feel?" Jisung asked you, more like a whisper.

"Not fun, thank you." You stated calmly, while still trying to get away from Jaemin, the boy tightens his hold to your arm, his other arm are already at your waist.

Well, you gave up in the end.

"You can't get out mwaahaha!" He shouted while laughing evilly.

"Anyway let me start!" You said, taking all of the attention you get inside the room, even the narrator going closer.

What could be the interesting story you has?

"So.. I knew how all of you were very sensitive about this topic, well not really if you aren't Jaemin." You explained, Jaemin ears perked hearing his name.

"Oohhh.. What is it?" Haechan who heard the summary of your story is very excited.

"Remember how, back when we were an elementary students there are a new substitute teacher for our class?" You continue, everyone nodded their head.

But then by the power of Mark brain cell, he discovered it way faster than the other, when it comes to elementary school there's a lot of embarrassment going around the 8 of you.

And that thing is one them.

"Don't tell me.." He mumble.

"Yup! How can I forgot Miss Kang? That one teacher who made Mark, Jeno and Haechan going berserk, or you can say first love?" You smiling evilly seeing how the three mentioned boy getting shy, their ears turn to red.

"Miss Kang? Ohh yeah yeah! I remember!" Chenle chirped happily, of course he remembered.

"Yeah I knew.." Jisung whispered.

"Wait I forgot how Jisung falling for Miss Kang, it's very cute I swear!" This time you went overboard.

How back in the day, Jisung would always smiling everytime Miss Kang give him a compliment, even Mark who hated math learn it just to get noticed by Miss Kang.

Haechan would always try to point his hand toward the air, just to asked a question, and acting like he doesn't know anything when he's always the first one who knows how to finish math homework, Jeno the typical nerd he is always try to be the best students, just so he can see how Miss Kang proudly talking about him in front of the class.

And Renjun, the one who are being oblivious, that guy would always prepared an apple just for Miss Kang exclusively from his uncle farm.

Chenle in the other hand, doesn't understand a thing back in the day, he just follow everything that his friends doing, pretending like he do have a crush to while in fact he wasn't.

"Omg! Really? they did that?!" Jaemin gasped, and while getting second hand embarrassment when he heard about the story.

"Yeah, sadly you have can't join us to see how cute and naive they were, Jisung is the cutest one, poor boy was so happy because he got 97 in Math Exam to impress Miss Kang, but doesn't know that she's already married at that time." You said, ruffled Jisung hair who looked very gloomy.

"It's not my fault, I don't know that, Mark didn't tell me about it." He protests, Mark eyes turn big.

"What?! It's not my fault, Miss Kang was so beautiful I can't help to fell for her." He said taken aback.

"Anyway that was pretty fun, seeing how naive you guys were." You said finishing your story.

"Wait wait, you guys remember how Jisung literally almost burned down the laboratory?

"Omg yes!" Haechan shout happily, he remember every part of it.

"Yeah, we almost burned it if it weren't because of Jaemin smartass we would already getting sued."

That time, in a chemistry class, Jisung, Renjun, You and Jaemin were partnered to do some experiments but because of Jisung clumsy hands.

The laboratory almost burned to the ground, thankfully Jaemin who are fortunately know how to stop the fire before it become out of hands.

"Yeah yeah, I remember how literally Renjun just watching it while shouting about how he's afraid of the fire, Jisung already crying and Yn is the only one who help Jisung calmed down." Jaemin explains about the situation.

Probably that's why the 8 of you always labeled as the trouble maker back when you were still in elementary school, you know how basically every teacher hope the 8 of you ever getting transferred to another school.

Even how Mr. Ben always try to make you guys got expelled because the man are too tired to babysit, how Mark always chewed a gum on his class, even Jeno who are very obedient sometimes get out of his comfort zone because of how the 7 of you always whispering evil plan to his ears.

Anyway there's still a lot of story being told that night, you stayed up late as always other than Jisung who already falling asleep on top of Jeno shoulder.

"Well I guess we should be sleeping at this hour, Jisung seems very tired." Jeno said, while looking at his left side of shoulder.

"Yeah we should, I want to sleep next to YN jinx!" Chenle exclaimed, you nodded your head, he bopping his head excited.

Not even an hour later, the eight of you are already falling asleep, being in the most comfortable position ever.

Good night!

The narrator leave the room.

Previous / Next.

A/N ;

Okey I found this being one of the cutest thing I ever wrote, anyway, it's already morning.. Actually afternoon but you don't hear it from me, I always love this type of story actually.

Btw this story has a concept of like how the tv series showed? Like episode 1 might not be the same like how episode 2 will be so yeah, there's a whole new story everytime, and I take request.

This has something to do with NTC story, the difference is based on how this is basically a spin off, how they are best friend with you and that's is the main focus of the story.

Prepare for more fluff and humor I try my best to include it, but yeah anyway not everyday is a happy story.

See you next time! 😃 ps. I probably will upload more of 7DAW than NTC because of how I got a little bit confused on NTC.

Tag ;

[sanderssidesfanfiction]

If There’s a Place I Could Be - Chapter Thirty Eight

If There’s a Place I Could Be Tag

March 14th, 1998

Emile was tired. He had a long day today, and it just felt like it was getting longer when he realized that he had to visit family. It was only one set of his aunts and uncles, and they only had two kids, but he still felt exhausted and not up to much.

That changed the second Emile caught sight of his two younger cousins, though. Their eyes lit up and he felt a small burst of happy energy at being the source of that excitement. He was able to play with them while the adults talked, and Emile laughed as the three of them danced around the living room. He knew he would be dead on his feet later tonight, but that was the price you paid sometimes for family. And it was totally worth it.

  July 4th, 2001

Emile was sitting in the park’s field on their picnic blanket, fondly watching a small child running around, chasing a butterfly. Remy nudged Emile’s foot, capturing his attention. “What has you so smiley?” Remy asked.

“The kid over there,” Emile said, pointing. “Kinda reminds me of some of my younger cousins. Makes me think about family, but in a good way.”

“You can think about family in a good way?” Remy asked dubiously.

“Yeah, I can,” Emile sighed. “It’s not often that I really give it thought, though.”

Remy shrugged. “Why? I get you don’t like my family, but you don’t think about yours often?”

Emile shrugged. “Well, there’s always the issue of...say...extended family asking about my love life,” he said. “Some of them are accepting and others...I don’t know. They certainly don’t come across that way. And then there’s my grandfather to worry about.”

“He’s not accepting?” Remy asked. “Someone in your family is homophobic?”

“Yep,” Emile said, voice strained. “I’ve told him about girlfriends, before, but never about my boyfriends. My parents knew, of course, but not him. He just...doesn’t understand, and doesn’t want to make the effort to understand, at least not right now.”

Remy winced. “What about that kid had you smiling, though? Why were you thinking of family in a good way?” he asked, redirecting the topic back to their original conversation before Emile could brood for too long. A fact which Emile appreciated.

“Well, it makes me think about how things were when I was younger,” Emile said. “And it takes me back to when my cousins were really little and I got to help take care of them. And because my brain is weird and makes random leaps sometimes...”

“What?” Remy asked.

Emile shrugged, looking away. “Makes me think of having kids of my own, some day. Whether or not that’s something that actually happens. And I’m not like... seriously considering anything. I was never one who really gave a family much thought as a kid, it was never something I wanted outright. But sometimes, in my head, where there’s no lasting consequences if I screw up, I imagine there’s a world out there where I do have kids, biologically or not, and I get to...be a good influence, and make sure they know they’re cared for emotionally and physically, and...I don’t know. It’s not something I seriously want, and I would never ask you to raise a kid with me, especially not over this conversation, or any like it. It’s just...a fun mental exercise, sort of.”

Remy seemed to consider this a moment. “You know, I think you should donate to that sperm bank like you wanted to a while ago.”

“What? Why?” Emile asked, mind effectively doing a record scratch.

“I mean, it’s not like you’re going to be the one doing the parenting, but you get to help that family actually exist. That’s pretty cool, and if you really want to help families become families, well, that’s a pretty noble cause, I’d say. And you seem to have family on the brain a lot lately. It could...I don’t know, it’s possible that it could quiet that part of your brain when it starts to nag you about your own family,” Remy said with a shrug.

Emile sighed. “I mean...the reason it’s so hard is because I do want a family, just a little bit. Not enough to do anything about it, but I’d like to be a part of someone’s life like that. I’m not sure if donating to a sperm bank would offer that same satisfaction.”

Remy shrugged. “Look, you can do it or not, but I say you should give it a go. Worst comes to worst, no one uses your donation, you know? You could do it anonymously, no one would have to know it was you who was the father.”

Emile shook his head. “No, if I were going to donate I’d have my donation be Open ID. I just...I don’t know, if there were kids out there, I feel like it would be only fair for them to know who I was. To be able to ask about medical history in the event of some emergency or another. Even if they tried to seek me out, just to know who I was? That would be okay. I wouldn’t mind keeping in contact with a kid who I helped conceive by like, e-mail or what-have-you. Anonymous donation...just isn’t an option I’d like.”

“Oh,” Remy said.

“Does that change your opinion of it?” Emile asked.

Remy shook his head. “No, if you want to do it, you should do it. Not being anonymous just means we might have an extra person to send Christmas cards to in eighteen years.”

Emile laughed. “Can you imagine if the parents of that poor kid were homophobic? They’d have an aneurysm!”

Remy practically cackled and a few people nearby sent them odd looks. “Oh, man! There’s no laws saying you can’t donate if you’re gay or bi, right?”

“Not that I know of,” Emile said. “So assuming we’re still together in eighteen years, we’d have some very interesting Christmas cards to send.”

Remy sighed, a smile still on his face. “I like to think we’d still be together in eighteen years. Maybe twenty.”

“Yeah?” Emile asked.

“Yeah,” Remy said. “I mean, if we’re not it would have to be for a real good reason, because I can’t see myself... not enjoying your company.”

Emile blinked. He knew that Remy loved him, they had said as much to each other countless times by now. But every once in a while Remy still said things that took Emile’s breath away. Emile took one of his hands and intertwined it with Remy’s, giving him a smile. He wasn’t sure if Remy even understood how huge this was to Emile. Remy wasn’t just talking about his feelings openly, but he was talking about them casually. Like he was talking about the weather, or saying that Emile’s new glasses made him look nerdier than he already did. It was something that Emile saw as amazing progress. “I love you too, Rem,” Emile said softly.

Remy offered him a smile that was fond and full of softness, and again it took Emile’s breath away for a few seconds. He would do anything to see that smile more, and it made him ecstatic to know that he could do that just by saying how he honestly felt about Remy. His boyfriend.

The sun started to set as Emile and Remy brought out their dinner and began to eat. They had set up their picnic blanket in prime territory to watch the fireworks later tonight. And for now, they were just going to enjoy each others’ company. “So, are you going to do it?” Remy asked.

“May as well,” Emile said with a shrug. “I mean, like you said. Worst comes to worst no one uses my sample. And it’s just one appointment, and then it’s over, and I don’t have to deal with as many nagging thoughts as I otherwise would.”

“Because instinct will know that you helped produce offspring with your DNA and your genetic line gets passed on, and everything works out,” Remy teased.

“Something like that,” Emile laughed.

They returned to eating and soon it was dusk. “Fireworks should be starting soon,” Remy said idly.

Emile felt like he was vibrating in his excitement. “I know. Fireworks are super cool, aren’t they?”

“Yeah,” Remy agreed. “Sometimes they’re a little loud, but they’re very pretty.”

Emile gasped dramatically. “You, Remy Picani, appreciating something that’s pretty?! Wow! I never thought I’d see the day!”

“Shut up!” Remy laughed. “I can admire things that are pretty, and I do it often enough that it’s not unusual! I just usually don’t verbalize it!”

“Oh yeah?” Emile challenged. “List five things around the park that are pretty, right now!”

Remy looked around. “The butterflies, the flowers, the clouds, the sunset in general, really, and a certain man I happen to be sharing a blanket with at the moment.”

Emile short-circuited and made a strangled noise of surprise. “Shut up!” he said, but he was laughing as he did it.

“Not a chance,” Remy said. He dotted kisses on Emile’s cheek. “I have the prettiest, most beautiful boyfriend in the world, and he deserves to know it.”

“Remy!” Emile squealed, laughing. “Stop! I’m not pretty!”

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” Remy said, a mischievous glint in his eye. “And therefore, I can call you pretty as I please. Because to me, there’s no one prettier.”

Emile was blushing, cheeks as hot as a forest fire by this point. “You’re the worst,” he groaned into his hands.

“If by the worst, you mean the worst at letting you think you’re anything but exceptional, then I agree,” Remy said, continuing to pepper Emile’s face with kisses as he removed Emile’s hands.

“Remy!” Emile squawked. “Come on! You’re not playing fair!”

“Well, I’m not playing,” Remy said. “I’m dead serious about this.”

Emile blushed harder, a fact which he had previously thought impossible. “You’re a sap,” he said, a desperate attempt to get Remy to pay attention to something other than Emile.

“Maybe,” Remy allowed. “But I’m your sap. You’re stuck with me. Forever. And nothing you can say or do will change my mind.”

“Really?” Emile asked, surprise coloring his words.

“Emile, I seriously doubt there could ever be a time in my life where you’re not so much as my friend anymore. And I don’t intend on breaking up with you. Like, if you were the one to stop this,” Remy gestured vaguely in the air, “Then I wouldn’t be able to stop you, and I’d respect your decision. But until that hypothetical day comes to pass, if it ever does...I’m here with you. There’s no place I’d rather be, in complete honesty.”

“I...” Emile was at a loss for words. “I don’t know what to say.” There was a lump in his throat and his eyes were getting hot. Remy was being so open about loving Emile, and it was in public, where people who might disapprove could see them. Remy was taking that risk, and...and by the look in Remy’s eyes, he knew and he didn’t care. He loved Emile that much. “...I love you,” Emile whispered.

Remy smiled good-naturedly, and pulled Emile into his arms for a hug. “I love you too,” he said.

Emile turned in Remy’s arms to kiss him, and the second their lips met, the first firework of the night went off in the sky. Both of them jumped before dissolving into laughter. “Wow, our love really does set off fireworks! Just like in the movies!” Emile laughed.

Remy giggled. “That’s pretty cool,” he said. “I’ve never had a relationship that’s set off fireworks before.”

Another boom reverberated through the park and the two turned to look at the falling red sparkles. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Emile asked.

Remy grinned, eyes fixated on the sky. “Almost as beautiful as you, Emile.”

“Stop,” Emile whined.

“Never,” Remy vowed.

They stayed in the park, watching the fireworks go off, content to just be with each other for a while. After the fireworks ended with about twenty consecutive fireworks going off at once, and people were packing up their stuff, Remy and Emile still stayed on the blanket. “I love little domestic moments,” Emile said.

“Yeah, they are pretty nice,” Remy agreed.

“We should make an effort to do more stuff like this,” Emile said. “Going out on dates is fun and all, but so is cooking together. Having pillow fights. Cuddling. It’s super sweet.”

“Oddly enough, I don’t mind that kind of sweetness,” Remy idly mused.

“No?” Emile asked.

Remy hummed in thought, before placing a peck on Emile’s lips. “No. Not when it’s with you, at any rate. You seem to make every moment special. You help me see the good of the little things in life.”

“I’m glad I could help,” Emile said. “The last thing I want is for you to be miserable because anything good that comes your way gets immediately dismissed.”

“I had a bad habit of doing that, yeah,” Remy agreed. He smirked at Emile. “But then a beautiful, good man came into my life and turned that around.”

Emile squeaked. “Stop it!” he protested, but he was grinning ear to ear.

[cmi-miu]

Ya’aburnee - Chapter 8 (Seventeen Soulmate AU)

Soulmate AU: The last words your soulmate says to you are the words tattooed on your wrist.

Pairing: SoonWoo, JiHan, SeokHao

Title: Ya'aburnee (arabic): yak-BER-nee (n.) lit. "you bury me"; the hope that your lover or beloved will outlive you as to spare yourself the pain of living beyond that person.

Chapter Summary: It’s not like Wonwoo loves Soonyoung. And envy is a feeling he’d never experienced before. But maybe his heart breaks a little because despite not being in love, he does like Soonyong enough to be jealous.

Woonwoo prides himself at his lack of pathetic emotions like jealousy. He’s not a petty guy after all.

He also likes to think that when he married Soonyoung it was merely to shut his aunt and uncle up with their constant reminders of his failed love life. After all, he didn’t have much to say about the matter after having failed in twelve relationships since high school and one failed marriage two years ago. And it’s not like he ever fell in love either so chances of falling in love with someone other than his husband after marriage were slim too, he figured.

So it’s only natural that he’s mad at himself for hating the way Soonyoung gets cozy with some guy in the canned fish aisle when he’s out shopping one Sunday evening.

He hates everything about the scene. From the way Soonyoung plays with the other man’s hands as they’re picking out groceries. To the way the man giggles and latches onto Soonyoung every time his husband tells a joke. He hates the familiar air with which the two men behave in each other’s presence as if they’ve been training to do so since birth. And Soonyoung smiles so easily in the man’s presence—in fact it’s the first that Wonwoo’s seen him smile since their marriage.

And more than anything, he hates the way they look so happy with each other.

Because he and Soonyoung are not happy. Especially when with each other.

But maybe he does get jealous and maybe he is a petty guy because he makes it’s obvious that he hates everything about their little moment together as he purposefully clears his throat ramming his shopping cart over Soonyoung’s poor pinky toe.

A cuss word stops at the tip of his tongue when Soonyoung looks up to see Wonwoo seething at him, a lone box of strawberries sitting in his cart.

“Won— Wonwoo?” Soonyoung manages to slip out. As if the mere fact that Wonwoo is capable of grocery shopping is a shock to him.

The ‘other man’ raises an eye at Wonwoo and does nothing to move away from Soonyoung’s side hug as he shoots him a Cheshire smile.

“And who’s Wonwoo?” He asks Soonyoung, who looks like those baboons on NatGeo when they’re shocked at amateur magic tricks. Wonwoo hates that look on him.

“Umm… Wonwoo! This is… this is Seokmin. And Dokyeom-ah this is…”

Wonwoo waits for Soonyoung to complete the sentence, but the hesitance makes his blood boil. He watches Soonyoung struggling to explain their relationship — as if Wonwoo is just some acquaintance who he doesn’t want to hurt by calling an acquaintance but doesn’t want to give the wrong idea by calling him a friend either.

The ‘other man’ snickers watching Soonyoung fumble around him words and send fervent glances between Wonwoo and himself. He cheekily shoves Soonyoung away and pushes a hand out for Wonwoo to shake.

“I’m Seokmin,” the ‘other man’ tells him. “Soonyoung’s business partner and college roommate slash the best friend.”

“I’m Wonwoo”, he easily takes the hand offered never looking away from his husband as he forces a smile. “Soonyoung’s life partner and current roommate slash the husband.”

The shock on his face is enough to tell Wonwoo that Seokmin clearly was never informed about their marriage. He can’t really pinpoint the location but a part of his heart breaks at the knowledge.

“Ah~” Seokmin awkwardly stares between the pair and moves away from Soonyoung’s grasp on his hips. Ruffling his hair as he sends a silent glare towards Soonyoung.

***

Wonwoo bites his lips when he sees Soonyoung trying to evade his eyes and heaves a sigh as he starts pushing his cart. “I still need to finish my shopping so… I’ll see you around, Mr Seokmin.”

He doesn’t wait for a reply and walks away with his cart and out of the convenience store altogether. He doesn’t have the strength to continue shipping, oddly enough.

When Soonyoung walks into their apartment that evening he doesn’t find Woonwoo in their bedroom or his study. He doesn’t check his own office because he knows that Wonwoo would never enter it without permission.

A dull ache settles in the back of his neck when he thinks back to their chance encounter in the convenice store just a few minutes ago. He goes into the kitchen to pour himself some water as he thinks back.

He had become tongue tied in front of Seokmin and Wonwoo when he saw him. And by the time he realised how wrong everything must’ve looked to him, Wonwoo had already left the store.

The dull ache turns into throbbing when Soonyoung realises that he doesn’t even know where Wonwoo might be and he doesn’t know of anyone who might. Last time he checked Wonwoo hadn’t made any friends ever since he moved into with him.

The blood in his cranium seems to rush with adrenaline as he quickly makes to leave the apartment again when he stops midway through the kitchen. A blue post it stuck to the refrigerator catches his eyes and a sigh that had been painfully lodged into his chest releases when he reads its contents.

Out for a walk. Dinner’s pizza; please order it yourself. (Didn’t feel like cooking).

His legs give away and he stumbles, walking out the kitchen. Cold sweat lines his forehead as he walks out the apartment.

For once, he knows where to find Wonwoo.

***

Soonyoung eyes the silhouette of a man in a maroon pullover, siting dejectedly on the swing set. Looking up at lord knows what. And smiles despite himself.

It’s eleven at night so there are no kids to send him dirty glares at the man for stealing away their swings and it’s dark enough to allow the moonlight to brighten the play area.

Soonyoung’s heaves a grateful sigh as he walks towards his husband in the swing and takes a seat in the one next to him.

Wonwoo acknowledges his presence with just a look and goes back to counting stars (or glaring at God. Soonyoung thinks it’s definitely the second one).

They sit in silence for a few minutes before Soonyoung is the one to break the silence.

“Did you have dinner yet?”

Wonwoo never looks away as he questions him back, “Seokmin used to be your ex-boyfriend right? Before Mingyu...”

Soonyoung bites his lips and turns to look at Wonwoo but his husband doesn’t ease his anxiety with eye contact. Instead, Wonwoo chooses to ignore Soonyoung’s discomfort.

“During high school. It was ages ago.” Soonyoung replies after several minutes that feel too thick to breathe.

“Just now… were you two…”

“No!” His husband is quick to refute the though and in the back of his mind Wonwoo is thankful for the swift denial. He hadn’t prepared himself for a confession of adultery. “We’re just… we’re just friends. I did date him years ago but it’s not like that anymore. He’s just… clingy.”

Wonwoo continues staring up at the sky and his lips tremble when he asks, “did you like him a lot?”

Soonyoung bites his lips at his question, Wonwoo can make out from the corner of his eyes. The guilt sits mockingly at the tip of his lips. “I used to. A lot, actually.”

“How come you didn’t marry him then?”

“Because… I don’t love him… like that.”

Wonwoo turns away from his admiration of the moon and whispers his next words but they sound like a cannon bolt to Soonyoung. “So do you love me like that?”

Soonyoung stares at the man in front of him. His eyes shining bright under the moonlight. There are freckles on his nose and his lips, though dry are plump enough to make his desire. And for the first time in six months. For the first time since their marriage. Soonyoung wishes he really was in love with Wonwoo.

Because the way the moonlight falls on the curve of his face. And the way Wonwoo’s dusky skin glistens with perspiration. And the way Wonwoo licks his lips, biting them as he lets the lower lip fall. Everything about Wonwoo in that moment is desirable and unattainable.

As it is, however, all he can respond with is, “no…” in an after thought he adds, “not yet…”

They continue to stare at each other. A soft breeze ruffles Wonwoo’s slightly long hair and every cell in Soonyoung’s body aches to just reach out and card his fingers through the jet black locks. But he refrains.

The moment breaks when Wonwoo starts speaking. For once, Soonyoung welcomes the distraction because it feels almost sinful to feel that way for Wonwoo.

Because they’re not in love. Because they’re married but not in love.

“Then why’d you marry me? Seokmin would’ve been a better choice if it was just about getting settled for you parents’ sake.”

“He has a boyfriend.” Soonyoung mumbles, pulling his gaze away. “They’ve been together for years.”

Wonwoo looks back at the sky, blinking away a tear he hopes Soonyoung doesn’t see (he does) and asks, “but why’d you marry me?”

Soonyoung ponders over the question for a while. Heaving a sigh as he continues staring at his feet. Not caring about the sand on his shoes as he thinks. Wonwoo patiently waits for him to reply. Giving him enough time to make up a lie. Anything to shut Wonwoo up.

But Soonyoung chooses not to lie. He has never lied to Wonwoo.

“Because my parents liked you.” Wonwoo turns to him again and this time it’s Soonyoung who’s looking away. He heaves a sigh and continues, “when I lost Mingyu… I didn’t think I could ever love again. My parents were scared for me. Josh was scared for me. I was… am… will always be broken beyond measure. But before our marriage I was near death. I wouldn’t eat. Couldn’t sleep. I was in and out of the hospital for days.”

Soonyoung looks back at Wonwoo and forces a smile on his face despite the tears choking him and whispers to him, “everyone thought I was incapable of falling in love again. At least on my own. They weren’t exactly wrong.”

“And I was the closest person who could replace Mingyu,” Wonwoo whispers back.

Soonyoung shakes his head and whispers, “no. You can’t replace Mingyu. You never will.”

Wonwoo searches Soonyoung’s eyes for any of the hesitation he had when introducing him to Seokmin but it's not there. He’s so sure of himself, so certain that Wonwoo will never be what Mingyu was for him, that all the strength in Wonwoo’s body leaves him.

It’s devastating. It’s devastating despite the fact that they’re not in love. It’s devastating because he likes Soonyoung. He doesn’t love him yet, but he likes him. Not a lot, but enough to be content with being married to the man.

It takes every strength in his body to speak but Wonwoo doesn’t let his voice waver when he does. “Good,” he mumbles. Letting the air ruffle his hair into his eyes so he has an excuse to push them away. “I shouldn’t.”

“You probably hate me for it though. Right?”

Wonwoo shakes his head at that and stands up from the swing. He walks toward his husband with a small smile and offers him his hand, pulling him up and Soonyoung takes it without much thought.

“Should I?”

“You should.”

Wonwoo mulls over his words as they start walking back. A silence settles between them that is far from comfortable but sure is inviting. Soonyoung is once again the one who breaks it as they enter the elevator.

“Have you had dinner?” he says, licking his lips in, what Wonwoo has learnt, is anxiety.

“Not yet.”

“Good. I’ll make some pasta for us then.”

[micahscowgirl]

Bite Me ~ Chapter 1

Micah Bell x f!reader

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Warnings: Cussing

Word Count: 2802

This is my first post and my first story. I know it’s not the best ever and I know that there are mistakes, but I enjoyed writing it and I hope that y’all enjoy reading it. Sorry in advance... Micah has my heart on a rope dragging behind him. 

Chapter 1

You have been with the Dutch Van der Linde gang for just over two months. You hooked up with them in Blackwater after a run-in with Dutch himself. He saw your life for what it was: pointless. You were working as a "waitress" in a saloon. Bossed around by the owners and your pleasure-seeking customers. Life wasn't so great for you. Dutch pulled you out of it and gave you a new one.

It had only been a month since you had joined your new family when everything went south for the gang. A heist went sour. Everyone was frantic, packing the camp and running around like ants in their tunnels. Everyone seemed so accustomed to it, but it was all happening so fast, you had to step away to breathe. It startled you when Dutch put his hand on your shoulder and, in all this madness, he smiled. "Y/N, I know this is all happening very fast and you haven't been with us for very long, but we would all be grateful for you to join us on our journey."

You had become quite fond of your new friends, but Blackwater is where you spent your entire life. You were born there, raised there, abandoned by your parents, abused, worked as a whore, taken advantaged up, spent too many nights crying, sore, and broke... It wasn't as hard as a decision as you had thought it would be. 

"Of course I will join you and your Family, Dutch. I am a part of this now, too. This has become my battle."

He smiled. "I was hoping you would say that." He stood and began to walk off. A few steps away, he stopped and turned to face you. "Y/N,"

"Yes, Dutch?"

"This isn't just 'our' family, it's your family now, too." He turned back and walked away.

~~~~~~

It was a month now since the gang left Blackwater. Unlike the other women of the camp, you were treated differently. They all knew you were stronger, tougher than the others. Dutch saw it, Hosea saw it, and even Arthur saw it. After the terrible start of spring in Colter, they saw your talents. You had signs of a leader in you, but also a beast that would fight and steal and, overall, make the gang a whole lot of money.

That is why you are where you are now: sitting at a bar in Strawberry, drinking whiskey, and working with--or more like babysitting--the biggest asshole you know. Micah Bell. He is an overall twisted person, always picking and prying at people's skins, trying to dig out the worst in them. He was one of the few people in the gang that you didn't get along with--Pearson and Molly O'Shea being the other two. He would spend evenings stirring and twisting people up, trying to catch them on fire. He must get off on the idea of someone's brain completely blocked out by rage, almost to the breaking point. 

At the moment, he was playing cards with a few guys. No one at that table seemed to be enjoying themselves. They could've been shoveling cow shit and have been a little more enthused. Wearing frowns on all of their faces and fashioning cigarettes and shot glasses either in their hands or in arms reach. No easy conversations, just harsh glares. They're only playing for money, not for sport. 

After your second beer and third shot, you felt drunk enough to get a good night's rest in an unfamiliar bed. You paid for your drinks and room and made your way up the stairs. After pulling off your hat, shirt, holster, boots, and riding pants, it didn't take long for you to fall asleep when your head hit the pillow.

You were woken up just under an hour later by the sound of glass breaking and guns firing. Jumping out of bed, you grabbed your pistol and crouched on the side of the bed opposite the door, pointing it and waiting. After waiting what felt like forever, you could hear lawmen bringing the commotion to a halt. You stayed in your position a few minutes after the saloon had become quiet again, before standing up and sliding back in under the covers. You had seen your fair share of bar fights: fists, knives, and guns, and you knew the best way to handle them was to just stay out of the way but also remain alert. Keeping your gun closer this time, you managed to fall back asleep very quickly. If you dreamed, you didn't remember them.

~~~~~~

You woke up the next morning to a beautiful stream of sunlight making its way into the room. After getting up and stretching, you slide back into your clothes and head out back to the outhouse. After relieving yourself, you made your way around the saloon to your horse. "Hey girl, how was your night?" you say, pulling an apple out of your bag and feeding it to your horse. You pull out your horse brush and begin to wipe away the past days’ grime from its brown fur. After making your way around to the other side, you see him. Baylock, Micah's horse, but instead of being hitched with yours like it was the previous evening, it was standing in front of the town's jail.

"You stupid son of a bitch." You say to yourself. As your brain starts to wash away the sleep and alcohol, you realize that he must've been part of the commotion in the saloon that past night. You mount your horse and begin to trot closer. You see two lawmen standing outside of the door.

"The man in green," --an O'Driscoll, you know-- "said the other guy wasn't in town alone." You freeze. "Says there was a woman with him. Or a girl. She was at that age it was hard to tell." You bow your hat and direct your horse in a different direction. As soon as you passed sight of the town, you kicked your feet and rushed your way back to Horseshoe Lookout. Thinking of your failed mission to find a lead, you realize that Micah has yet again found a way to make your skin burn and your fists tighten. He just had that special talent.

~~~~~~

It was a few days later when you heard that Arthur had broken Micah out, making quite a mess in the process. It was early morning, and you were helping Mary-Beth wash some clothes in a nearby stream when she told you what had happened.

"Micah just had to get his guns from some poor fool in town. Arthur says that Micah shot the guy immediately and then started shooting every lawman and even a few people who tried to get in the way of his escape." She chuckled. "I can't believe Dutch keeps Micah around. Nothing but trouble that bastard is."

"Yeah, and poor Arthur is always picking up his messes it seems." You say just as Arthur starts to walk up.

"Speak of the devil," Mary-Beth says. "We were just talking about how much trouble you are, cowboy." She has always had a thing for Arthur. You wouldn't be surprised if they'd hooked up in the past after a drunken night. If it hasn't happened yet, it was sure to one day.

"You know me, ladies, always picking fights and firing people up. I can't keep my guns holstered for two seconds without getting bored. Oh wait, that's Micah, the asshole that almost got me killed."

"How did that go, by the way?"

"Well, Y/N, I busted him out, broke the damn bars outside his cell, should've been able to get out with minimal casualties, but then our dear pal just had to retrieve his precious guns. We ended up shooting the whole damn town. Barely made it out of there alive. After we got out, he told me that he was going to hang back and try to get something to bring to camp. He called it a 'peace offering'."

"Sounds about right," Mary-Beth says as she drops the shirt she was working on into the basket with the rest of the cleaned clothes. You follow suit and stand, picking up the basket. 

"Here, let me grab that for you," Arthur grabs the basket from under your arm. "Don't need y'all doing all the work." He says with a wink. Mary-Beth giggles, you smile. "Y/N, Dutch wants you to head over to his tent. I think he might have a lead for you. Mary-Beth, I can help you hang these up." She happily skips off with him, turning her head to you to shoot you a smile.

Dutch is standing with Hosea in his tent. "If you could, Hosea, meet with Arthur later and discuss our next move. Speak with Bill as well, and I heard Uncle might have a lead, too."

"Will do, Dutch." He turns to leave, nodding at you as he passes. "Miss."

You return the gesture and walk up to Dutch. "You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, ma'am. I think I got a lead for you if you're not busy that is. A stagecoach hit, near Strawberry. I know you just returned from your trip there, but I think this will be a perfect job for you since you're so good at playing the part." He's referencing your innocent damsel in distress act. It's a classic, works every time.

"I'm not busy, wouldn't mind some fresh air away from the camp, that's for sure. Washing and mending clothes isn't really my thing."

"Then it's settled." He pulls out his map and tells you his plan. Payroll coach--should be easy enough.

As soon as Dutch is done, you say your goodbyes and head to your horse.

~~~~~~~

It was mid-afternoon when you arrived at the spot Dutch told you. You hitched your horse in the woods nearby and found a tree to sit next to while you waited. It would still be over an hour before it arrived so you figured you'd get comfortable. 

It had been about 40 minutes according to your pocket watch, the sun starting to go behind some hills in the distance. It was still early spring, so the sun set earlier than you liked. Keeping yourself occupied, you picked at the grass around you, pushed your boots around in the dirt, and watched some birds building a nest in a nearby tree. The tree started hurting your back, so you had scooted to sit criss-cross instead, imagining the native Americans sitting around their fires, beating drums, and dancing. They always seemed so happy, so at peace. So lost in thought, you didn't notice the steps behind you, snapping branches and dragging the dirt. It wasn't until you felt a presence inches from your back that your heart skipped a beat. You couldn't react in time; an arm grabbed your torso, locking your arms to your body. A hand covered your mouth. Your heart was racing, your body shifted, trying to loosen yourself, but the grip was too strong, your eyes began to water in terror. 

"Aren't you a little far from home, dollface?" the voice was deep, coming from lips right next to your ear, touching just barely. You shiver, chills running down your entire body. "A damsel like yourself shouldn't be out by herself, there are sick people out there that would just love to take advantage of such a tight, young body." The hold tightens, the strength is unreal, your body crumbles, moving closer to the ground. The weight on your back is too much. You feel tears running down your face. 

You try to say "Please. Leave me be." but all that comes out is a muffled noise coming from your throat.

The voice becomes lighter and immediately more familiar. "What was that, Y/N? I can't hear you. And are you crying?" He chuckles. 

It's Micah, that asshole. He loses his grip on you, letting you fall forward onto the ground, right into the dirt you were digging at what felt like decades ago.

"Micah... you bastard!" you wheeze. You gather the strength to push yourself from the ground. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"I should be asking you the same question. You shouldn't be out here by yourself. Especially if you're going to be stealing someone else's lead."

You looked up at him, the tears had drawn lines in the dirt on your cheeks. "You can have the damn coach. And you better not try to pull any shit like that ever again. Not with me, or anyone else." You get back on your horse and begin to ride away. "Fuck you, Micah."

"I'll consider your offer." He says as you trot away. You feel heat return to your face, and your eyes begin to water once more. 

~~~~~~

The next evening is when Micah made his return. The take must have been huge because everyone was celebrating, and most of them didn't like Micah just like yourself. Although, everyone always happily invites a reason to drink and pretend that everything in the world is good. While most of the camp gathered around the fire, you stood from a distance and watched with a beer in hand. Javier was playing his guitar and Uncle was leading the others in song. Micah sat with Dutch's arm around his shoulder, holding a conversation with him and Arthur. Arthur hated Micah about as much as you did, but the fact that he was keeping himself in the conversation for as long as he was, let you know just how great that stagecoach ended up being. That should've been your prize. 

Working on your second beer, your mind started to turn. You wanted revenge on him. There was one thing you could think of that would really make him pissed, and that was confusing him, playing with his head. Turning his own tricks against him.

After everyone had started to head to their tents, you knew that soon Micah would head out. He didn't have a tent, mainly because he suffered from insomnia, but also because Miss Grimshaw refused to make him one. The fire was getting dim now, but you could still make out his figure. Once he turned to walk into the trees, you followed. He claimed a tree to lean on about 50 paces away from camp. He was facing away, so you quietly made your way up behind him, stopping about five feet behind him. He lit a cigarette and started to smoke. 

"Where's my cut?" You say, making him jump, turning to face you.

"Jesus Christ, Y/N! You shouldn't go sneaking up on people like that!"

"You're one to talk." You walk a little closer to him. "Once again, where's my cut, Micah?"

"You don't get one, you didn't earn it."

"You might see it that way, but I think I did my part. I let Dutch know what happened to you. Although, thinking back, I believe I might have left out a part." He frowns. "Yeah, that's right! I left out the part where you were playing cards with a couple of O'Driscoll boys. Maybe I should fill Dutch in on the whole story." You smirk.

Micah laughs nervously, kicking at the ground. "You know Y/N," he starts moving closer, but you hold your ground. "you really are a little twisted 'damsel in distress', aren't you?"

"Why indeed I am." He's moved so close to you, you feel his heat and smell the whiskey on his breath. His blue eyes are looking straight into your soul, but you don't let him see it."Now, my cut?"

He sticks his cigarette in between his lips and reaches into his pocket. He pulls out 50 dollars and hands it to you. "There, for all of your hard work."

You count it. Slowly. Twisting his nerves. "Hmm... I think this is a little short." You look up at him and he snarls. You reach up and take the cigarette out of his mouth and place it in your own, taking a long draw. You release the smoke directly into his face. "There, that covers it." You pat his cheek. All he does is glare at you, hard. His chest is rising and lowering faster than normal. 

"Fuck you, Y/N."

"I'll consider your offer." You say with a smile and walk away. You feel his eyes on you, but you continue to walk. Out of everything that has happened, there is one thought that surfaces above the rest. When taking the cigarette from his lips, you noticed how surprisingly soft they were. You shake the thought away, and head back to your tent to rest, a smile staying strong on your face.

[st-crylo]

Rebound

Part 9

A/N: Sorry again that it took so long to get this part out! Hopefully you guys will like the slice of drama I threw in there. Thanks so much for your patience, and I hope you enjoy!!

Warning: Swearing, minor angst

Word Count: 4.7K

Tagging: @haylaansmi @nankstasty @thomasscresswell @maybe-your-left

Masterlist

The next day, you decided you weren’t going to bring up Hux again unless that’s what Kylo wanted. So, you spent your day deciding whether or not to panic about dinner with the Solo’s. You had decided to panic.

Yes, you and Kylo were good friends once, and you had spent a lot of time there when you were younger, but you were older now, and both you and Kylo were phenomenally different people. Would they still like you? On top of that, since Rey was going to be there as well, you had to be worried about every single move you made. It would be easier to convince Kylo’s parents that the two of you were actually dating, but Rey was a different story. If you didn’t play your cards right in front of her, she was going to be able to see past you like cellophane. Hopefully, you could pull it off.

The whole day was spent with you pacing your room, or being on your phone as a distraction, until Kylo called. Once he did, you quickly got dressed into a nice blouse and jeans, deciding not to be too fancy. When you got outside, you were glad that you’d decided that. Kylo, like usual, was wearing a black shirt and black jeans, his leather jacket adding the only bit of color, with a K.O.R. patch on the chest pocket. You wondered if you’d ever get a jacket like that, too. 

In the driveway, Kylo gave you a hug as Mr. and Mrs. Skywalker stepped out of the house. Once Kylo let go, Mrs. Skywalker walked over to you, arms open before pulling you into an embrace.

“It’s wonderful to see you again, (y/n). Just so you know, Leia makes absolutely wonderful food. I know it’s been a few years, but just in case you forgot,” she said before letting go of you, holding your hands in hers as she looked you up and down. Her eyes were filled with brightness, but there was a playful look behind them as well. She was certainly still young at heart.

“Well, we’ll be taking Kylo’s car, so you kids can hop in the back,” Mr. Skywalker said, holding up Kylo’s keys. Kylo laughed from behind you, and you had to try your hardest to keep the smile from your face.

“Anakin, don’t be ridiculous. We can just take the sedan,” Mrs. Skywalker started.

“Oh no, I paid for this car, the least my favorite grandson can do is let me drive it,” Mr. Skywalker said with a grin before climbing in the car. Mrs. Skywalker opened the passenger door, and Kylo moved the seat forward so you two could climb in the back. You felt sorry for Kylo, since his legs would undoubtedly have to fold in like paper. He let you get in first though, insisting that he’d better be able to gauge how much room he was gonna have if you were already in the car. Once he had climbed in the backseat, it was an extremely tight fit, the length of Kylo’s legs practically causing him to lean against you. 

The whole ride to dinner, you were filled with anxiety. There was so much pressure to convince so many people that you were in a relationship, it was making your heart pound. Luckily, Kylo was occasionally rubbing circles on the back of your hand with his thumb, which was helping to keep you from fully freaking out. You tried to look out the window to quell your nerves, but it didn’t help that you were pulling into the same rich neighborhood that you’d been in for Jordan’s party. Though the memories from the party warmed a part of you, thinking about the fun you’d had, you couldn’t help but be even more intimidated by the fact that Kylo’s family had money, even though you’d never know it, looking at the way his grandparents lived. 

Pulling up to the house, you had to keep your jaw from dropping. When you were younger, Kylo and his parents had lived in a smaller, quainter house. You knew that his parents were successful, so you don’t know why you expected them to still live in that house, but you definitely weren’t expecting the magnificence of the house in front of you. It was a colonial house, white columns holding up the overhang of the triangular roof. The shutters were a crimson red that stood out against the russet color of the brick that made up the outside of the house. The lawn was perfectly taken care of, with beds of dahlias and chrysanthemums in full bloom, colors of pink and orange adding to the feel of fall. The path leading up to the house from the driveway was cobblestone, and it had a very old-timey feel to it. You weren’t surprised that Kylo would rather live with his grandparents.

You noticed as Mr. Skywalker pulled further into the driveway that there were already three cars parked. The third car you recognized, because you’d ridden in it with Rey plenty of times. The fact that they were already here didn’t help your nerves either. When the car came to a stop behind the familiar green car, you let out a breath before waiting patiently to be let out of the car.

“Anakin, that was ridiculously cramped for those two. Kylo practically squished poor (y/n),” Mrs. Skywalker said as she straightened out her dress, standing beside Kylo as he waited for you to step out of the car. Once you did, Kylo fixed the passenger seat back and closed the door. 

“Oh, come on Padme, they don’t mind.” Mr. Skywalker said as he winked at Kylo, who tried to hide a laugh, though he was unsuccessful. His grandmother gave the two of them dirty looks before linking your arm with hers and marching up to the house.

“Men,” she said with exasperation. “Thankfully, they aren’t our only company for tonight.” Soon, the two of you were at the front door, Kylo and Mr. Skywalker pulling up the rear. You wished you were beside Kylo instead, as your heart pounded within your chest. You worried everyone could hear it as Mrs. Skywalker reached to open the door. She was, however, beat to it. The door swung open and revealed Kylo’s mom, her short stature standing in the door frame, and her eyes twinkling as she smiled at you.

“Oh, (y/n), it’s been too long! Come in!” She took you from her own mother’s arms and brought you into the house, Kylo walking past his grandparents to catch up to you.

“Mom, I’ll show her around the house,” Kylo said, taking a hold of you and bringing you towards him. You almost tripped, but Kylo caught you in a very discreet way, helping you straighten up.

“Oh, alright dear. Don’t forget to say hi to Rey, her and your Uncle Luke are in the living room,” she said before giving Kylo a hug. You guessed that he hadn’t been around recently with how long the hug lasted, and you almost felt as if you were intruding on a moment. Soon, though, she let go of Kylo, letting him lead you to the stairway in the middle of the foyer before catching up with her parents. Once you and Kylo had ascended the stairs, and were out of sight from the adults, you heard them turn silent for a while before hearing Mr. Skywalker speak.

“He just needs a break, Leia. Sometimes, young boys like him do.”

You could almost feel Kylo roll his eyes as he took your hand, leading you to a room at the end of the hall. Once inside, you knew it was his room.

The walls were navy blue, covered with posters of different bands. All of his furniture was dark as well, looking as if it was all made of ebony, but you knew it was only the way the wood was stained. The sheets on his bed were black, and looked undisturbed, as if they’d been made up in expectation, but hadn’t been used yet. The curtains that were hung over the window were also navy blue, blocking out a lot of the light from the sunset. The room would’ve been totally dark if not for the light having been turned on. As you stood in front of the closed door, examining the room, Kylo practically threw himself onto the bed, laying the wrong direction on the bed, and staring at the ceiling.

“I wish they’d stop that,” his deep voice said, breaking the silence. You let out a sigh as you walked over, sitting down on the bed next to him. “Every time I leave the room, they talk about me.”

You sat beside him in silence, unsure whether or not to speak, and what you would say if you did. Sometimes, silence was better, more comforting. You felt that this was probably one of those times, but you still wanted to comfort Kylo, so you reached out and took his hand in yours.

It wasn’t a romantic gesture, rather a silent way of communicating that you were listening. However, your small action seemed to put a crack in the dam of Kylo’s emotions.

“It’s so frustrating. They want me to be this perfect kid, to get all A’s and get into a good college. They want me to fit into the mold that society wants me to fit into, but I just can’t. I’m not that person, I’m not that respectable, well-brought up kid, but I don’t want them to think it’s their fault. I just wish they would listen to me, listen to what I feel or have to say, but they never do.”

He rambled on like that for a few minutes, and as you looked over at him, you noticed that his eyes were beginning to tear up. With a sigh, you laid down beside him, placing your head on his chest, and wrapping your arms around his waist. Kylo responded by wrapping his arm around your shoulder, letting out his own sigh before falling into a comfortable silence.

You could tell that his room was probably a place of great discomfort for him. He didn’t have to explain why, you simply knew that there were memories associated with this room that made him feel vulnerable, and though it was a strange thing to be thankful for, you were glad he’d let you into this part of himself that was hidden from everyone else. You suspected he really didn’t have anyone to vent his frustrations to, so you were sure that just having someone listen was better than anything he’d ever received. 

Without warning, the door was flung open, causing you to jump up off of Kylo. There was a scoff from the doorway, where Rey stood, a disgusted look in her eyes. 

“I don’t even want to know what the two of you were doing,” she said.

“Has anyone ever in your life told you to fuck off?” Kylo said, without moving from his position on the bed. You instantly felt uncomfortable, caught between them.

“Only you, asshole. Dinner’s ready,” Rey said before walking off, leaving the door wide open. With a sigh, Kylo sat up, running a hand through his unruly black hair before standing up. You did the same, and followed him out of the room and down to the dining room. 

The dining room was as opulent as the entire house, the walls a lovely and deep red with white crown moulding. The table sat in the center, long enough to just fit everyone here tonight. At the head of the table was Mr. Skywalker. To his right, Mrs. Skywalker was seated next to him, talking enthusiastically to her son, your teacher Mr. Skywalker. Beside him, Rey was seated, having just gotten settled from being told to retrieve the two of you. At the other end of the table, Mr. Solo sat, with Mrs. Solo sitting to his right, beside Rey. There were two seats between Mrs. Skywalker and Mr. Solo saved for the two of you, with full plates already placed. 

As you approached the table, Kylo walked a little ahead of you, pulling out the seat closest to his father for you. You took the seat, understanding that Kylo didn’t want to sit next to his dad. As soon as you were settled, Kylo sat down beside his grandmother. 

“So, (y/n), how have you been? It’s been a while since we’ve seen you,” Mrs. Solo said as you started biting into your food.

“Pretty well, Mrs. Solo. Enjoying senior year so far,” you answered.

“Oh please dear, call me Leia. Now, how long have you and Ben been dating?” she asked. You looked to Kylo, who seemed to be doing the math in his head.

“Almost two months, I’m pretty sure,” you said. Kylo simply nodded in agreement.

“That’s wonderful! I always hoped the two of you would date some day! You were always very patient with Ben back then, I’m sure you still are,” she said before taking another bite of her food, waiting for your reply.

“Well, he is a bit of a handful, but I keep him in line.”

“Good, that’s just what he needs,” came Mr. Solo’s voice. You could almost feel Kylo roll his eyes.

“Let’s not talk like that tonight,” Mrs. Skywalker said before taking a sip of her wine. “We’re here for you two to meet this lovely girl, or rather, reintroduce yourselves. So, are the two of you planning to go to homecoming?” 

“We weren’t really wanting to go to the football game, but we’re going to the dance with a few friends. (y/n)’s mom wants to take pictures at their place before we go, though,” Kylo responded.

“We were supposed to be taking pictures at Poe’s place,” Rey said under her breath, just loud enough for people to hear.

“I’m sorry, Rey, did you say something?” Kylo said with a smirk, staring his cousin down. She looked up at him, a terrifying fire in her eyes, but a calm expression on her face. Her lips turned upwards into a smile, one so obviously fake, it could’ve been made of plastic.

“I don’t have a problem at all, Ben,” she responded. Kylo furrowed his brows, but didn’t respond. You could already tell that either something was going to go terribly wrong, or it would be pretty close. 

“Well, I’m glad you’re going, Ben! You haven’t been to homecoming before,” Leia added before taking another bite of the food in front of her.

“Well, for once, I’ve found someone worth going with,” Kylo said, looking at you. You knew he was just saying it to appease his parents and hold up the facade, but you couldn’t help the way your heart fluttered at his words. 

The whole table finished their meal, and soon, Leia was pulling out a pie she had made for dessert. So far, Kylo and Rey had gone one without incident, and you were ready to breathe a breath of fresh air in relief, at least, until Mr. Solo said something that opened a can of worms.

“(y/n), you seem to be having a pretty good influence on Ben. This is the longest he’s gone without getting into some kind of trouble,” he said. You could feel Kylo clench his fist from beside you, but you placed a hand over his and simply smiled at Mr. Solo. 

“I certainly hope so,” you said before taking a bite from the piece of cherry pie you’d been given.

“Or maybe he just hasn’t been a bad influence on her yet,” Rey said, a little louder this time.

“Rey,” her father said from beside her.

For a moment, Kylo was silent as he glared at Rey, and you knew this would be a bloodbath. Watching, you waited for Kylo to say something, but desperately hoping he wouldn’t.

“Can I not breathe without you being such an obtuse bitch about me?” Kylo said finally, his voice ringing through the room, fists clenched at his side.

“Ben!” Leia said incredulously. Everyone else simply watched in awe, mouths agape.

“Kind of hard when you keep proving me right,” Rey yelled back, standing from the table and glaring right back. 

“What the fuck did I ever do to you?” Kylo yelled, also standing. In your mind, you were going through a roller coaster of emotions. You were embarrassed, as this was your first dinner with Kylo’s parents, and Rey and Kylo were now choosing to argue, but you were also angry that Rey had antagonized him, and that Kylo had fallen for the obvious bait. 

“For starters, you took away my best friend!” 

You looked up at Rey, shocked and angry. You were absolutely speechless. Luckily, Kylo expressed what was on your mind.

“We were friends before you even met her! You met her through me! Is it so awful that maybe we can be happy together?”

Deciding you’d had enough, you stood as well, taking Kylo’s hand and pulling him away from the altercation. Kylo was happy to follow you, his breaths coming out in huffs as he tried to keep himself from losing it. You looked back at Rey for a second, who looked dejected and hurt, but you really couldn’t find it in you to care. 

Kylo, once having broken eye contact with Rey, headed for the front door, opting to cool off in the fall evening air. Once the two of you were outside, Kylo headed for a bench in the garden, sitting down and resting his elbows on his knees as he put his face in his hands, black hair poking out in between his fingers. You were silent as you sat beside him, but you had to admit you were pretty angry yourself. It was ridiculous that Rey felt that only one of them could have you, and you hated feeling like some toy they were being forced to share. 

“I’m sorry,” Kylo said after a few moments of silence, causing you to let out a sigh. 

“I would say it’s fine, but I think we both know it isn’t. You had to know she was antagonizing you,” you responded, looking at him as he raised his head from his hands.

“Yeah, I did. I always fall for it, though. She knows exactly what to say to piss me off.” Kylo let out a sigh before running a hand through his hair. “Besides, it wasn’t fair of either of us to bring you into the argument.”

“Technically, talking about me started the argument,” you offered, taking one of his hands and holding it in yours. Kylo laced his fingers with yours, his large hands dwarfing yours, but the feeling of it being extremely comforting. “Eventually, she’ll come around.”

“Yeah, when we’ve ‘broken up.’ C’mon, she’ll never be happy while we’re together,” Kylo said, looking off into the distance.

“She probably won’t even be satisfied then, because I’ll be damned if I’m losing you as a friend again,” you said. Kylo turned to look at you, a small smile on his face. 

After a few minutes, Mr. and Mrs. Skywalker came out of the house, talking to Leia before heading towards the two of you. They both seemed to have disappointed looks on their faces, but you knew that Mr. Skywalker’s would hurt Kylo the most. As much as Kylo didn’t want to admit it, he still looked up to his grandfather.

“Are you kids ready to go?” the old man said to the two of you. You both nodded in response. “Alright, well let’s get in the car. Kylo, you need to at least text your mother and tell her you’re sorry.” Straight to the point.

Kylo rubbed the nape of his neck as he stood, not making eye contact with his grandfather. “Yes sir,” was all he said before heading towards the car. 

***

After the dinner, Rey made it a point to make sure she avoided eye contact with you. As much as you wished you were fine with it, it still hurt, especially since she thought Kylo had stolen you away from her. Thinking about that only made you angry though, and so you sought the friendship of Kylo’s friends, or rather, your new friends.

The week before homecoming was busy and full of excitement. With spirit week in full swing, it was nice to watch everyone dress up for each of the days, ending on Friday with Mos Eisley spirit day. You decided to opt out of the festivities this year, but Sami had gone all out. Each day she was in a more eccentric costume than the next, which was very different from her usual aesthetic. It was extraordinarily amusing on Friday when she was covered in red and gold for the school colors. 

“Wow, I never knew you had this kind of school spirit,” Kylo had mused at lunch that day. Sami stuck out her tongue at him.

“Sorry I didn’t want to be a stick in the mud for senior year. Besides, it’s a good week! I turned in my application for the Coruscant Institute of Art!” she replied before taking a bite out of her cafeteria chicken strip.

“Wow, congrats! I hope you get in!” you said, leaning against Kylo’s shoulder, decidedly not hungry at the moment. 

“Me too! Mom’s on board and everything, so if I get in, that’s where I’m going!” She said excitedly.

“That’s so great, Sami!” Alan said.

“At least you know what you want to do. I’ve got no fucking clue,” Kylo said with a sigh. 

“Why don’t you write? Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted to do?” Phasma said from the other side of Alan.

“You write?” you asked, looking up at Kylo. He was blushing slightly, but was obviously trying to hide it.

“Yeah, a little. I mostly journal, but I’ve wanted to write books for a long time,” he said, scratching the nape of his neck. 

“I think you should do that, then. I bet you’d be a great writer.”

Unbeknownst to either of you, across the table, Sami had pulled out her phone, sending a message to Phasma.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d think they were actually dating.

Yeah, no kidding, was Phasma’s reply. 

At the end of the day, the homecoming plans were set into motion. It had been decided on Tuesday that Phasma and Sami were going to stay the night with you Friday night so that you could all get ready for the dance together, and so that everyone would be there for pictures before heading for the school. It was exciting for you, considering it would be your first sleepover with your new friends.

“Alright, Kylo, I’m gonna follow you, so don’t drive too crazy,” Phasma said as the four of you stepped out of the front school doors.

“Trust me, there’s no way I can with all the traffic going into our neighborhood. Can’t believe you guys all get to spend the night together and leave little ole me wondering what you’re up to all night,” Kylo said with a fake pout, causing you to playfully shove him away.

“My mom would kill me if I brought you in the house, much less my room. We’ll call you in the middle of the night to keep you entertained,” you said. Kylo laughed as Phasma and Sami split off, heading for Phasma’s car. Like usual, you tossed your stuff into the car while Kylo discreetly lit a cigarette before climbing into the car himself. Once he did so, he rolled the window down and exhaled, the cloud of smoke flying away on the wind.

“Hope you ladies have fun tonight,” Kylo said as he backed out of his parking spot. 

“I hope so, too. It’s the first time since the summer that I’ve had a sleepover,” you responded, a pang in your chest as you thought about the last time you, Rey, and Rose all had a sleepover at Rose’s place. It was sad to think that it would probably be the last time you would ever have fun with Rey like that. 

“Well, I’m sure the three of you will have a great time,” Kylo assured before taking another drag. 

Like usual, the traffic to get out of the school was awful, but soon Kylo was pulling into your neighborhood, Phasma and Sami close behind. Kylo, naturally, pulled into the driveway when he arrived at his grandparents’ place. Phasma parked in the cul-de-sac, on the spot of the curb between your house and the Skywalker house. Soon, you were climbing out of the mustang, making sure to grab your backpack too, and waving a goodbye to Kylo before walking over to Phasma and Sami, who were climbing out of the car. You looked back at Kylo once more, who was finishing up his cigarette, making eye contact with him. He winked at you and you simply shook your head before leading Phasma and Sami to your house. 

Once inside, you were practically bombarded by your mother, who was desperate to learn all about the new friends you’d made. Though Phasma was dressed in her normal all-black androgynous attire, Sami’s spirit wear made your mom a lot more open to talking to both of them. You almost wondered if Sami had thought that through. 

“Well, I’ll order you ladies a pizza! If there’s anything you need, don’t hesitate to ask!” your mom said with a smile as the three of you headed up the stairs. 

“Thank you so much, Mrs. (y/l/n)!” Sami replied before turning around and following you into your room. Once in your room, everyone dropped their things, and you let out a sigh as you plopped onto the bed. 

“Is she always like that?” Phasma asked once Sami had closed the door behind her. 

“No. She just started being like that after what happened with Shawn. She’s just glad I’m hanging out with people again, even if they aren’t my old friends,” you responded, flipping over to lay on your stomach and pulling out your phone, scrolling through instagram. 

“Speaking of your old friends, neither of you said how dinner went,” Sami said, taking the seat at your desk. She looked out the window, surveying the cul-de-sac. 

“Practically a disaster,” you said with a sigh. “Rey antagonized Kylo, and Kylo fell for it. Then, Rey had the nerve to say Kylo ‘stole’ me from her.” Phasma scoffed, sitting on your bed now as well.

“That’s gross. If either of them were open to the idea, you could be friends with both,” Phasma added.

“I know. It’s just the fact that Rey can’t stand the fact that I would date Kylo. It would be easier if she knew we’re just friends, but she doesn’t.”

“Are you really just friends, though?” Sami asked, causing a stunned silence to fall over you. You could feel your face heating up against your will, and you couldn’t hide the shock that had hit you, like a freight train going through the middle of nowhere. 

“What do you mean?” you asked, hoping that Sami had some other thoughts in mind, and not what you felt she was going to say.

“I mean, without prompting, the two of you act like a couple anyways. Is there any way that you might have feelings for Kylo?” Sami asked, turning your desk chair to face you. 

“No! I mean, he’s one of my best friends, I can trust him with anything, but I don’t feel anything romantic for him,” you insisted, feeling an intense heat under the stares of your two friends. After a few seconds, Sami simply shrugged, deciding to drop the subject.

“As long as you’re sure,” she said before reaching to turn on your TV. You turned on Netflix and started a show, but as you sat there watching, your mind couldn’t help but wander. 

Was it possible that you did have feelings for Kylo? No, you couldn’t possibly, he was like a brother to you. Of course, any time he looked at you a certain way, your heart did flutter, and you couldn’t deny that you liked the way it felt when you held his hand, or when he kissed your cheek. No, you didn’t have any feelings for him, and even if you did, there was no way he had feelings for you. 

[youknow-i-loveit]

Why I Still Feel Like I Need To Ask Permission Before I Do Anything Ever

Randomly hit with the realization that my parents are still holding me back because they never taught me how to act with autonomy.

They never taught me how to be assertive or how to tell people things.

(They also wrecked my self-esteem, which was pretty horrible to begin with.)

My parents were very “do this because I told you to” authoritarian types who didn’t like to answer questions, and especially hated it when you questioned them. Questioning other authority figures was okay sometimes, depending on who the authority figure was, but my parents wanted to reign over their children with absolute power.

They generally had issues with needing to feel in-control. They didn’t have great role models for what it means to be an authority figure- my mom was the youngest, doted upon and spoiled for being the only girly-girl in the family, and by the time her parents had her (the eighth child), they were exhausted and distant, permissive, laissez-faire parents- and my dad grew up under an abusive military man who routinely beat his children, who used his voice as a weapon, and when he was at work, his wife ruled through manipulation, primarily guilt-tripping. Since my dad was the second of his six brothers, he was considered to have a better idea about how to deal with children, so my mom generally deferred to him, partly because of that, and partly because if my dad didn’t feel like he was in charge, he would make sure everybody felt miserable.

And as they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. My dad very much took after his father. He thought he was being toned-down and “gentle,” and bragged all the time about how he had it worse, making it sound like he was going easy on us. He often threatened to act more like his dad. But while I feel bad for him and his brothers and the abuse they endured, that gave him no excuse to abuse us the ways he did.

I could go on and on, but the point is, my parents didn’t know how to be in charge, but they felt that it was their god-given right to be in charge-- literally, they kept throwing “Honor Your Mother And Father” at us from the Ten Commandments.

My parents never admitted to being wrong. In fact, my dad hammered it in that being wrong was shameful and something that none of us should ever, ever do- ignorance was considered shameful, and if we ever dared utter the sentence “I didn’t know,” he would mock us, roar at us, and quite often, make references to that moment for the rest of the day, if not the rest of the week. It took me years to be okay with admitting that I don’t know things. To teach myself that learning should be fun and exciting, and that teaching others new information should be seen as an opportunity, not as a burden.

So my parents are proudly ignorant control freaks with an abusive streak, who want to rule with absolute authority; so far so great right?

My parents were strict Catholics who wanted us to follow their faith. They took us to church every Sunday. They enrolled all of us in Catholic school until they couldn’t afford the tuition anymore. They insulted anyone non-Catholic- even other Christians- calling them stupid and sinners and sometimes even “evil,” and considered anyone who attended Catholic church but didn’t adhere to their beliefs “not true Catholics,” so they were lumped in with the rest of the riffraff who were apparently going to hell.

We were allowed to question authority figures that didn’t adhere to their strict beliefs, and even encouraged to make fun of them, but if we ever dared to question someone who did, my parents informed us with cold, cutting certainty that we were making the wrong choice and were in danger of going to hell ourselves.

We grew up pretty sheltered. Our parents wouldn’t let us participate in most of the fads that swept up everyone else in our peer groups. It didn’t even matter when those peers were all Catholic kids attending our same Catholic school- my parents still thought their parents were making the wrong decisions, and we were effectively isolated from socializing with our peers. For a window into this, consider that I was forbidden from watching or playing Pokemon during the late 1990s. At recess, literally everyone else in my class would “play Pokemon,” whether that meant they were actually playing the trading-card game or whether they were pretending to be characters from the show. Since I wasn’t allowed to participate, I was left alone on the swings, accompanied only by one of the lunch moms who took pity on me. (Her name was Mrs. Stevenson. She was funny. I liked her. For Halloween, she wore an ugly holiday sweater with Froot Loops glued all over it and said she was a ‘cereal killer.’)

We weren’t allowed to watch Sailor Moon, or Rugrats, or Dragon Ball Z. We weren’t allowed to play with Furbies. We were allowed to accept Beanie Babies as gifts, but our parents were too poor to buy us any, so I think the most I had was about six.

We were also (wrongly) informed that people different from us were all stupid. I questioned this from a young age, asking why people were different, but instead of actually answering me, my mom would go “Exactly!” as though that settled that.

So when I asked why African Americans spoke differently or dressed differently or said things like “black pride,” I was told it was because they were entitled and because they thought they were special, but that they were foolish and wrong. It was only later, on my own, that I learned they don’t do these things to set themselves apart from the rest of society out of some weird petty desire to be special and different, but because we stole their culture from them, and they need to reclaim an identity that they can be proud of. The system is stacked against them, so every act of embracing their blackness is an act of rebellion against the system that tries to crush them every day. They speak differently because of where they live, because of history and culture that have shaped their words that way, and if their grammar is improper, that’s most likely due to underfunded school districts, but it could also be code-switching so they fit in with their peers.

And when I asked why anyone would be anything other than Christian if the Bible really was the word of God, and God was real, I was told it was because they’re too stupid or jaded to see the truth. So when my uncle came out as Muslim when I was a teenager, our family ostracized him, berated him, and made fun of him relentlessly behind his back, because we all thought he was stupid. It was years later that I became an atheist and I realized the questioning process he must have gone through, the philosophy he must have studied, the books upon books he must have read, the agonizing introspection he must have endured, all while living under his parents’ roof... 

We were told that we were smart. That we were important and special. 

But we were also taught that we were constantly on the razor’s edge of being undeserving of love or redemption.

Naturally, this caused me to form strong attachments to characters like Loki, Bucky, and the Beast from Beauty and the Beast- characters who others saw as monstrous, but who seemed worthy of redemption, who didn’t seem to deserve everything that was done to them, even as much as they blamed themselves or got down on themselves sometimes.

The constant messages of “you need to be perfect or else” and “you are a disappointment,” accompanied by my dad’s ridiculously high standards, made me desperate for approval. 

I sought favor with my parents nearly every day, but was so often disappointed- especially by my dad. Even when I’d done something I was really proud of, he’d find ways to poke holes in it, talk down to me, call me stupid, and ask something to the effect of why I’d made such a horrible decision.

So I started looking elsewhere.

Friends. Partners. Teachers. Professors. Therapists. Co-workers. Bosses. Other people’s moms. Members of groups I joined. Anywhere I could get it, I was (and still am) constantly thirsty for validation, praise, and approval.

My parents probably weren’t trying to do this, but they taught me to constantly second-guess myself. They taught me that I needed to ask for permission to exist.

One of the things that was brought up over and over again whenever one of us would upset Mom was that “she gave birth to you.” On one memorable occasion, my dad went into graphic detail about how exactly the birthing process worked. He made it sound like some sort of accomplishment, or personal favor, that I should be forever grateful and reverent towards. But I never asked for this. Giving birth was something she couldn’t avoid. I should have never been guilt tripped into feeling like I owed her something for it.

Whenever my dad was a certain flavor of upset, he’d bark “Get out of my sight!” We would flee to some far corner of the house, behind some closed door, and cry where no one could see. In that moment, he had ceased to give permission to exist in his presence.

So when I first came out as trans, I struggled a lot, because I felt like I constantly had to ask everyone around me for permission to be myself.

It’s tragic that, in retrospect, everyone would have respected me a lot more if instead of asking, I had simply told them who I am and then been myself. I should never have felt so timid, so cowed. I should never have felt like I owed anyone an apology for asking them to use my name and my pronouns.

I should have been free to be me.

But when I lived under my parents’ roof, I wasn’t free. I was forced to hide, to pretend. I was forced to let them deadname and misgender me. I was still forced to attend church until I moved out-- I got out of attending weekly mass by pleading that it was detrimental to my mental health, after being forced to attend masses as an atheist for over a year. But in order to keep a roof over my head, I was still forced to attend Christmas and Easter mass every year, and badgered to attend more masses at nearly every opportunity.

I had to lie about who I was dating too. I had to hide all the ups and downs- the euphoria of new crushes and new relationships, the agony and heartbreak of breakups or bumps in the road. I couldn’t ask my parents for advice navigating this extremely important part of my life. Instead I had to figure it all out on my own, and lie, and pretend they were my “friends.”

My parents made me feel as though I couldn’t do anything on my own.

So to this day, I still often feel like I have to ask for help or for moral support in order to get things done. Not everything, but anything that my partner could feasibly be involved in or have any opinion on whatsoever. Filling out forms, looking things up, buying food, scheduling our week.

And anything that I’m not 1000% sure my friends would invite me to, or anything I’m not 1000% sure they want me to do, I’ll hang back on or stay silent. Any sort of physical affection that I’m not 1000% sure is welcome, I’ll hold back on or I won’t even offer, because I’m so scared of rejection or retaliation. Any complaints that I have, I’ll run by someone else first, and sit on for often weeks or months before I bring it up, if I ever bring it up, because I’m so worried that someone’s temper will flare, or that they will grow cold and distant and cut me off from their affection/ attention/ presence.

My parents never taught me how to ask for things.

They never taught me how to tell people things, simple things, like “I’m going to the store,” or “I’m a guy actually,” or say “Oh, you’re going to meet up with a bunch of people I know? Can I come?”

I’m self-taught in a lot of things, but socializing is one of them.

And as I’m sitting here typing this, I’m waiting for my partner, because we have to get through a lot of paperwork and beaurocratic nonsense this week, and even though not all of it strictly needs to involve her, I still feel like I can’t do it on my own.

It’s okay to ask for help. That’s something I’ve had to get used to too.

But sometimes I worry if I ask for too much help. >_<

[fangirlingtodeath513]

Sweetheart | a destiel fanfic

written for the @deanandcasbingo

Rating: T

read here on ao3

Why Dean ever agreed to truth or dare with this group is beyond him. They’re his best friends, which means they know every button to push to embarrass him.

“Dean! Truth or dare?” Charlie grins, her drink sloshing around in her cup as she points at him.

“Dare,” he answers, leaning back on his hands.

Charlie blinks at him for a moment before grinning mischievously. “Show us your underwear.”

Leave it to Charlie. Of course he’d chosen today to not wear his boxers. He could just say no and take a drink—they’d agreed on that if they didn’t want to answer the question or do the dare—but he’s not chickening out. Charlie knows exactly what she’s doing and Dean’s not gonna let her win.

Sighing, he sets his drink aside and stands, unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans. He slides them down, revealing the black cotton panties he’s wearing, the lace trim hugging his waist and legs. He hears a few gasps and Charlie giggles, so he tugs his pants back up as he sits back down and grabs his drink.

“Well, don’t think I ever woulda seen that comin’,” Benny says, a mixture of shock and mirth on his face.

Dean rolls his eyes, taking a sip. “Benny, truth or dare?”

Benny snorts. “Truth, brother. Your dares are terrifying.”

Dean smirks. “Fair enough. When are you gonna marry Andrea?”

Benny blushes, ducking his head. For a moment, Dean thinks he’s going to take a drink, but then Benny inhales. “I bought a ring a couple of weeks ago. I was gonna propose when we all go to dinner next week.”

“Oh my god!” Charlie squeals, setting her drink aside and dragging Benny into a hug. Benny chuckles, hugging her back.

“She ain’t said yes yet, cher.”

Castiel rolls his eyes. “She will.”

Benny smiles, hiding it by taking a drink. “Cas, truth or dare?”

Castiel smirks. “You know I don’t do dares. Truth.”

“One of these days we’ll get you to do a dare,” Meg mutters, shaking her head.

“Alright, if you had to date someone in this room, who would it be?”

Cas doesn’t even hesitate, “Dean, easy. I’ve known him since I was four and he’s easy to live with.”

Charlie smirks. “Not to mention attractive. I’m into ladies and even I can see that.”

Castiel flushes but doesn’t say anything. It makes Dean’s heart skip a beat just imagining that Cas might feel the same way that he does.

“Meg, truth or dare?” Castiel asks, clearing his throat and turning to her.

“Truth.”

Cas smirks. “Where's the strangest place you’ve had sex?”

Meg frowns as she thinks. “The quiet floor of the library.”

Dean gapes. “At college? How? Missouri patrolled that floor like a correctional officer.”

She smirks. “Those tables in the back that were closed on three sides? Kneel under there and she won’t see you.”

“I regret asking,” Cas says, shaking his head as he takes a sip.

“Dean, you still got those truth or dare cards? My brain’s getting too fuzzy to think of things.” Charlie giggles, finishing her drink and pouring another. Dean grabs the card game from his bedroom, separating the truth and dare cards.

“Meg, you’re up,” he says, taking his seat next to Castiel and taking a sip of his own drink.

Her eyes scan the circle before landing on Jo. “Jo, truth or dare?”

Jo hums. “Dare.”

Meg grins, grabbing a bottle of vodka. “I dare you to take a body shot off of Charlie.”

Jo snorts. “Easy, gimme.” She takes the bottle from Meg, nudging Charlie onto her back. She pushes her shirt up, pouring a bit of the vodka onto Charlie’s stomach, setting the bottle aside and licking the alcohol up. Meg giggles and Gabriel wolf-whistles, much to Charlie’s embarrassment.

The longer they play and the drunker they get, the more sexual the questions and dares become. Most of the stuff they’ve already covered, like Balthazar’s penchant for threesomes—or orgies, if he can manage to convince enough people—and whether Dean spits or swallows, but a few new things get dug up.

“Garth, truth or dare?” Anael asks, smirking as Garth blushes.

“Dare,” Garth says, swaying slightly where he sits.

Anael giggles. “Do a strip tease on the coffee table.”

Dean snickers, grabbing his phone and playing Pony through the stereo in the living room. Garth whips his shirt off and climbs onto the table, grinding and gyrating his hips in ways Dean never wants to see again. Nearly everyone is dying of laughter at the obviously joking manner Garth’s dancing, but Bess’s eyes are locked on her fiancé, face flushed a bright red. Dean smiles to himself, watching her instead.

Garth and Bess are high school sweethearts that made it through all four years of college halfway across the country without a single incident. Dean admires them, if he’s being honest with himself. Their relationship is the type he strives to have one day—open and honest, where they’re best friends first and foremost. It’s basically what he has with Cas, except he doesn’t get to end his days in bed next to Castiel.

The song ends and Garth steps down from the table clumsily, grin wide as he pulls his clothes back on. Bess grins up at him, glowing from the combination of alcohol and arousal. Chuckling to himself, Dean finishes his drink and raises an eyebrow at Garth.

They continue on like that for a while. Charlie’s dared to spray whipped cream on Dean and lick it off him, so she covers his arm and licks it off, much to both Dean and Charlie’s embarrassment. Meg admits that she’s thought about being a stripper, but the creepy dudes are too much of a turn-off. They even manage to get Castiel to do a dare, though they promise it’ll be a tame one. Benny comes up with the dare, which is to show them the tattoo he’d gotten in college. He and Dean had gotten sloshed that night, and the combination of alcohol and poor young adult decision-making had led to them getting tattoos. They’re small and easily hidden by clothes, though Dean wouldn’t get rid of his for anything.

Dean and Cas had picked out each other’s tattoos. Nothing too fancy, and nothing over a hundred bucks. Dean’s ended up being just two words—Hey Jude—in blocky letters just over his right hip bone. Castiel’s was a small honeybee with a dotted path leading to a small honeycomb, just above his left hip.

No one’s ever seen that tattoo, as far as Dean knows. Well, no one in their friend group, anyway. He’s seen Castiel bring home one night stands before, there’s no doubt they’ve seen it. And, as far as Dean knows, none of their friends know the story behind their tattoos either.

Castiel rolls his eyes, leaning back against the couch and lifting his shirt up. A soft murmur runs through the group, though most of them are simply confused.

“A… bee? Why a bee?” Anael asks, head tilted to the side, her long, red hair curling down her shoulders. In another lifetime, Dean would be so interested in her, but he’s only got eyes for Castiel.

Castiel smiles, tugging his shirt down. “Not your turn. Besides, I think that’s a story I’ll keep to myself, at least for now.”

Dean can’t help but smile. He knows exactly why Castiel wants to keep that story a secret, and he can’t exactly blame him. It goes all the way back to their childhood, though no one knows the full story.

They’d met when they were four, only a few months after Dean’s mother had died. They were in the same pre-k class and Castiel had been sitting alone during recess, picking flowers in the tiny field behind the school. Dean had wandered over just in time to see a honeybee land on the back of Castiel’s hand. He’d watched the younger boy with something he can only imagine resembled fascination as Cas’s big blue eyes turned to look at him. Castiel had quietly explained that his father was a beekeeper and that he liked being around the bees, liked watching them work. It’d been an odd introduction, though Dean hadn’t known that at the time. Regardless, from that moment on, he and Castiel were inseparable.

Dean’s tattoo had come from a midnight admission almost a decade later. Uncle Bobby had bought him a guitar for his birthday and, despite everyone’s insistence that he learn something current, Dean’s first song had been Hey Jude. It was a song he remembered his mother singing to him, and one of the only pieces he had left of her that was entirely his own. He told Castiel that the night of his birthday, well after he’d locked himself in his bedroom, intent on learning the chords. It was the first time he’d cried in front of Castiel.

“Dean, truth or dare?” Cas murmurs, words a bit slurred.

Blinking away the memories, Dean clears his throat and focuses on Castiel. “Truth.”

Castiel smirks. “What were you thinking about the last time you jacked off?”

Dean flushes, immediately pouring himself a shot and knocking it back. No way in hell is he answering that, since the answer would be Castiel.

The entire group stares at him in surprise. Dean frowns, shuffling around self-consciously. “What?”

“You’ve never turned anything down before,” Charlie says, squinting at Dean.

Dean shrugs. “Give me another one, then.”

Cas hums. “What was the worst sex you’ve ever had?”

Dean snorts. “Ah, Cassie Robinson. Senior year of high school. Condom broke halfway through, I couldn't get her to come, and I swear she was trying to bite me when she was blowing me.”

Cas winces in sympathy. “Ouch.”

Charlie yawns. “We should end the game, I’m gonna pass out. Same way as always?”

The group agrees, so Charlie draws a dare card and immediately dissolved into a fit of giggles. “Go skinny dipping.”

Everyone is still for a moment, then they all file out of the living room and onto Dean and Cas’s back porch. Their pool is clean and inviting, and it’s mostly dark, save for the one light they have over the back door. They won’t really be able to see anything in the darkness of the night, so Dean strips his clothes off and is the first to jump in the pool.

By the time he surfaces, there are splashes on nearly every side of him as his friends jump into the water. He shakes the water out of his hair, grinning as someone to his left splashes him. He splashes back blindly, laughing as he hears an indignant gasp from his left. It’s so dimly lit that he can only make out shadows, but soon there’s water splashing in every direction as all of his friends join in with loud, drunken laughter.

Eventually, he hops out and grabs a stack of towels from the pool shed. He dries himself off with one and leaves the rest on the deck, tugging his jeans on as everyone else climbs out of the pool.

“Okay, definitely bedtime,” Charlie mumbles, yawning.

Dean chuckles, heading inside and dragging every spare pillow and blanket in their house into the living room. Everyone files inside and they all pick an area of the floor, rearranging the blankets and pillows until everyone is comfortable. It’s a relatively tight squeeze, but they’ve all been close since at least college, so it’s not even slightly uncomfortable. At least, it wouldn't be, if Castiel wasn’t laying so close that Dean can practically hear his heartbeat. Resigning himself to his fate, he rolls onto his side and tries to fall asleep.

The next thing he knows, he’s waking up in a pool of his own sweat. It feels like there’s a space heater directly against his back, so he tries to move away from it. It’s only then that he realizes it’s a person behind him, one who has an arm slung around Dean’s middle. Dean lifts the arm up gently and tries to shift away, though whoever it is cuddling him clearly doesn’t like that. They whine quietly and snuggle closer to him, replacing their arm around his waist. A light kiss is placed to the back of Dean’s neck by a pair of very chapped lips. That would’ve given away who it was if they hadn’t decided to speak.

“Go back to sleep, sweetheart,” Cas murmurs, his words still slurred and his arm tight around Dean’s waist.

Sweetheart? What the hell? He’s been living with Cas for almost six years now, and Cas has never called him sweetheart before. He can hear Cas’s breath even out behind him, followed by nearly silent snoring.

“Sweetheart?” Charlie mumbles groggily. He can’t see her in the darkness of the living room, but he can picture the face she’s making perfectly. Half curious, half insulted.

“We’re not dating, Charlie. I don’t know why he said that. Maybe he was dreaming I was someone else.”

Charlie snickers and Dean can hear her shuffling around. “Or he’s really drunk and his inhibitions are down.”

Dean rolls his eyes and doesn’t bother responding. It’s far too early in the morning to dwell on Cas’s misspoken word, so Dean just closes his eyes and tries to fall back asleep. It takes a while—obviously, Cas’s arm is around Dean’s waist, no way is he forgetting that quickly—but eventually, he manages it.

The next time he wakes, it’s to stifled laughter from his friends. He rubs his eyes, blinking against the sunlight coming in through the patio door. There’s still an arm slung around his waist and soft breaths tickling the back of his neck. He doesn’t want to move but the giggling continues and he’s intensely curious what it’s about.

“Well, good morning to the happy couple,” Meg smirks, sipping from her mug as she meets Dean’s gaze. “Take it you two slept well?”

Dean blinks at her in confusion. “Me? What’re you talking about?”

Meg snorts, motioning to where Cas’s arm is still wrapped around his waist. Dean glances down at his arm, then back up at Meg, more confused than he’d been before. “Me and Cas? No way, he doesn’t like me that way.”

Charlie giggles. “He called you sweetheart last night.”

“Y’all coulda just told us you were datin’,” Benny says, cradling a cup of coffee in his hands. “You two have been makin’ eyes at each other for years now, none of us would’ve been surprised.”

Dean scoffs, though it’s mostly to distract from the blush on his cheeks. “Making eyes? I have never once made eyes at anyone, much less Cas.”

Castiel whines, nuzzling against the back of Dean’s neck. “Shhh, too early.”

Charlie grins. “Too early, huh? That why you called Dean sweetheart last night?”

Cas mumbles incoherently and Dean thinks he might’ve fallen back asleep until he goes rigid against Dean’s back and quickly withdraws his arm. “I what? I didn’t say that.”

Jo laughs. “You definitely did, I heard it too.”

Castiel shuffles away and sits up, rubbing his eyes. “Must’ve been asleep.”

Dean can’t help the way the statement hurts his heart. He’d sort of been hoping that it’d been a high-alcohol, low-inhibitions moment where Castiel had admitted his feelings. Of course he couldn’t be so lucky.

“Right, so who wants breakfast? We stocked up on eggs and bacon,” Dean says, making his way out of the blanket pile on the floor. He heads straight to the kitchen, not even waiting for an answer from the group. He gets coffee brewing before digging out the eggs and bacon from the fridge.

No one joins him in the kitchen, which is weird. Normally everyone would crowd into the kitchen and they’d all chat while Dean made breakfast. This is so far from normal that it’s kinda freaking Dean out.

“Dean?”

Dean breathes a sigh of relief, turning to glance at Castiel. “Hey, Cas. I was gettin’ a little lonely in here.”

Castiel smiles softly. “Well, I’m happy to keep you company.” He leans against the counter and watches Dean cook, twisting the hem of his shirt in his hands. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I don’t remember saying that, and I didn’t mean for us to end up sleeping the way we did.”

Dean waves a hand at him, shaking his head. “Don’t worry about it, Cas. It’s all good.”

Cas hums. “They think we’re secretly dating.”

“Yeah, I heard,” Dean laughs, shaking his head. “Weird, right?”

Castiel hesitates, which makes Dean frown.

“You don’t think it’s weird?”

Cas shrugs. “No, I mean, you’re right, it is a little weird.”

“You don’t think it’s weird,” Dean reiterates, his voice a mixture of wonder and confusion. Has Castiel really had feelings for him for a while? “You like me?”

Castiel rolls his eyes. “Of course I like you, I wouldn’t live with you if I didn’t.”

Dean narrows his eyes. “That’s not what I mean and you know it. Do you have feelings for me?”

Castiel hesitates, which should be more than enough of an answer, but Dean wants to hear him say it. Eventually, Castiel caves and ducks his head, a blush coloring his cheeks. “I’m sorry, I didn’t—mmph!”

Dean cuts him off with a kiss, pulling Castiel flush against him. His lips are chapped but so soft and pliant against Dean’s that he keeps kissing him. Cas’s arms wind around Dean’s neck and it’s like the icing on the cake.

At least, it would’ve been if the smell of burning eggs hadn’t reached them at that exact moment. Dean pulls away with a gasp, spinning on the spot and switching the burner off, moving the pan of charred eggs to the back burner. He slips the bacon, shooting Castiel a cheeky grin. “Well worth the burnt eggs, I think.”

Castiel rolls his eyes but there’s a fond smile on his lips. It makes Dean’s stomach roll in the best way, so Dean pulls him into another kiss.

“I suppose I can’t disagree,” Castiel says with a smile, kissing the corner of Dean’s mouth.

“Took you two long enough,” Gabriel says from the doorway, snickering when he startles both Dean and Cas. Dean rolls his eyes, throwing a hand towel at him.

“Get outta here, man!”

They can hear Gabriel cackling as he heads back to the living room. There’s a moment of silence, followed by loud cheers from their group of friends, undoubtedly because Gabriel had just told them he’d caught Dean and Cas making out in the kitchen.

“That’s… disturbing. Have they really been waiting that long to see us together?” Castiel murmurs, eyes still on the doorway where Gabriel had been.

Dean shrugs, kissing Cas’s temple before returning his attention to the stove. “Maybe. I know I have.”

Castiel hums, leaning against the counter and smiling softly. “Well, I’m glad my sleep and alcohol-addled brain exposed me, then.”

Dean laughs, leaning over to kiss him gently. “Me too.”

[medea10]

My Review of Grand Blue

How did I get into this anime? Well, I heard there were some good reviews about this particular title. It was one of those animes I probably should have watched in summer 2018, but more than likely I was watching some sequel no one remembers.

Iori Kitahara just moved to an ocean-front town to live with his uncle since he lives near Izu University (a school Iori was accepted into). His uncle owns a scuba diving shop that serves as a local hangout for members of the school’s diving club. Little does Iori know that this is a local hangout to get FUCKING SHIT-FACED!!!

I am not making this up. These members drink like it’s going out of business. And usually these drinking binges end up with blackouts and public nudity. In Iori’s case, he got so black-out drunk that he woke up in front of his new university’s courtyard…on the first day of school…only wearing his boxers! I’m beginning to see why Amazon put out an advisory at the beginning of each episode about drinking responsibly. But aside from drinking with a bunch of meat-head senpais, there’s also diving. Yeah, club activity is actually diving into the ocean.

So let’s dive into this college-leveled, binge-drinking club as we meet some interesting characters like, a raging otaku (Kouhei), Iori’s cousin with “Permanent Resting Bitch-face Syndrome” (Chisa), a girl who should get a makeup tutorial on Youtube (Aina), two meat-head senpais (Bukki and Tokki), Drinky McStripsItAll (Azusa), and Chisa’s “loving” older sister (Nanaka).

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: So this is an Anime Prime exclusive, so I doubt I’d be hearing a dub to this any time soon. The sub has quite the line-up of seiyuus including that upcomer I’ve been raving about all 2019, Yuuma Uchida. But a lot of well-known folks like Kana Asumi and Hiroki Yasumoto (who can literally play anything at this point) shine in this anime. Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

*Iori is played by Yuuma Uchida (Kyo on Fruits Basket 2019, Uenoyama on Given, Chika on Kono Oto Tomare, Sun on Oresuki, Ash on Banana Fish, and Shirazu on Tokyo Ghoul :re)

*Kouhei is played by Ryouhei Kimura (known for Hinata on Angel Beats, Hachiken on Silver Spoon, Takizawa on Eden of the East, Judar on Magi, Taishi on Tokyo Ghoul, and Hiyori on Free!)

*Chisa is played by Chika Anzai (known for Mina on Attack on Titan)

*Aina is played by Kana Asumi (known for Taneshima on Working!!, Ran on Shugo Chara, Kazakiri on Index, Yuno on Hidamari Sketch, Nagisa on Madoka Magica: Rebellion, and Tachibana on Nisekoi)

FAVORITE CHARACTER: I’m gonna say that after watching all 12 episodes; Aina (a.k.a. Cakey) grew on me. Horrible caked-on make-up aside, let’s be real here.

I think it’s because of the development we see with her ever since she was introduced early in the series. We see a girl trying her damndest to fit in with the tennis club only for it to blow up in her face (literally when we’re talking about all that makeup that’s “caked” on her face). Yeah, these guys treated Aina like garbage! But after joining the diving club, we see her be herself and slowly trust those around her. I think it’s more of this character resonating with me in some sad aspect, but I too feel the pain of trying to fit in or not wanting to let anyone down. Anyways, Cakey is my girl!

Poor dear, I feel your pain.

SHIPPING: So Iori is now a college lad and getting smashed eight ways from Sunday. And I’m sure he’s going to have his own picks of the ladies when he isn’t drinking with an otaku and a bunch of meat-heads.

…Or he can get freaky with his blood cousin!

*eyeball twitch*

ANYWAYS, Chisa has made her point clear with the disgusted face she makes whenever she’s around Iori. But in anime terms, we know that she has that classic tsundere syndrome. So when someone like Aina comes into the picture and Iori sticks up for her, jealousy arrives like a fucking A-bomb! Despite Chisa announcing to a wide, public setting that Iori was her boyfriend (while he was passed-out drunk), nothing too scandalous happened with this. It was just so she could keep creepy boys away. Honestly, I really have no problem if Chisa and Iori hook up. It’s actually better than Chisa being with someone who has an unhealthy obsession with her.

I don’t want to say Nanaka has a thing for her baby sister, but this is getting too borderline Yuru Yuri that I have to say something about it.

I’m pretty sure Aina might be a contender after all Iori has done for her throughout the series. It’s just that she can’t stand all that binge-drinking and getting buck-naked at any moment.

And then there’s wild card Azusa! She’s a flirt! What else can I say about her? She teases Iori every chance she gets. Hell, near the finale she tantalized Iori in sex. Wasn’t sure if she was kidding or if she really meant it! However she did shove a leek up Iori’s ass, but that’s because he was sick.

I swear this is normal behavior.

By the end of the series, we really didn’t get much in terms of full-on hookups. Many misunderstandings have occurred involving word-play. Iori, Kouhei, and their band of geeky friends are still virgins (though one of them came very close to sealing the deal). One of the meat-heads has a girlfriend (did not see that one coming). But on a positive note, Chisa and Iori’s friendship has been pretty steady. I wonder how long that’ll last!

ANIMATION: I gotta say it, the facial expressions on these characters were a laugh-riot. It wasn’t like this was pathetically sad that I have to laugh at it. But more of how expressive these characters got when they have to express hatred or disgust! This is more for comical expense and I happened to like it. It’s like with the anime Prison School, all the facial expressions worked in their favor. This, while out of place some of the time, never fails to make me laugh.

ANIME REFERENCE: While shopping for gear for an upcoming diving expedition, Kouhei came across two suits that would make any old-school otaku squeal.

The suits of Rei Ayanami and Asuka Langley Soryu from Neon Genesis Evangelion in diving suit form. And Kouhei got Chisa and Aina to try them on!

ENDING: At the end of episode 9, the diving club is heading to Okinawa for a special trip that is promised we will never forget. They made sure of that when the anime gives us a two-minute preview of what to look forward to in these final three episodes. Just be warned a lot of things mentioned really didn’t happen. It almost felt like one of those gag previews Gintama is notorious for.

Well Iori, Kouhei, and Aina are going to attempt at getting their divers license so that they can go even further down the ocean. It seemed like all three were doing pretty well when it came to the basics of diving underwater. However, it was quickly noticed by Nanaka that Iori was having trouble keeping water out of his goggles and that could result in immediate failure. So Iori practices all night (with help from Chisa and Aina). However, Iori ended up in some trouble when a patrolling policeman comes upon him in the pool. And Iori spent the rest of the night in the water because he was naked.

Because I’d be concerned if he wasn’t naked!

Well, the next morning, he caught a cold. Then dumbass thinks it’s a good idea to get rid of a cold by drinking vodka.

Because I’d be concerned if he wasn’t drinking!

And as a result he ended up missing his chance for obtaining his diving license. Kouhei and Aina were able to get their licenses. So the big diving expedition of Okinawa is about to commence and Iori has to sit this one out. But he remains hopeful to one day dive with his friends in Okinawa. After all that, the group travels to another spot and get fucking hammered. You all see the theme to this series, right?

But the last few episodes gave us a few moments involving Kouhei and Aina. Kouhei ended up stumbling into this group on accident (much like Iori), but discovered how much fun he had (aside from getting drunk as a skunk night after night). As for Aina, she learned that despite the diving club being full of a bunch of drunken meat-heads, these people care about her (unlike the previous club she belonged to).

So it was a memorable trip.

This was absolutely NOT what I expected when I picked up this anime. I notice Grand Blue being taken place in a cute ocean town and thought it would be just as cute as Tsuritama. But it turned out to be the anime equivelant of Animal House. I can easily tell you that my college years were NOTHING LIKE THIS.

Despite going to school in a state where the drunk-driving rate is sky-high, I did not witness any strange anomalies like arriving on campus and seeing a bunch of drunk, naked lads sprawled across the courtyard.

Now then, I do feel like this series could have focused a little more on diving and oceanography. It felt like the majority of the series involved characters binge-drinking, meat-heads fighting with tennis club members, more binge-drinking, sad geeks never getting laid, studying for a German test where you only get 20%, and drinking more than Sterling Archer. Not so much on the ocean like I would have hoped. And even though Iori gets the short-end of the stick in almost every episode, I do feel bad that he couldn’t join the rest of the club under water in the finale. That felt a little disheartening, but that’s just me. Short answer, I like this anime! If you’re in for a good laugh and are not turned off by all the drinking and nudity, I say go for it.

For what it’s worth, it’s a silly adventure I can see myself rewatching one or two more times. And if you’re interested in watching, Amazon Prime has all 12 episodes available for streaming.

Okay, this was quite the trip! Let’s pick our next Amazon/Netflix/Crunchyroll exclusive anime!

Think Zootopia, but set in high school.

Beastars!

Great choice as I even heard good things from celebrities who don’t normally watch anime.

[goldenworldyu]

I hope this letter reaches you well. 

I can’t hardly believe it’s been nearly ten years since I first came to Inaba. I was a huge jerk back then before I met them. I hated moving so much because my father’s or my mother’s jobs. I couldn’t keep any friends hardly. So I stop making friends with each new school I go to. Heck, I can’t even remember how many houses I’ve lived in since starting middle school. But then my parents told me they were going overseas and I had to stay with family I didn’t know very well for a whole year. I was pissed at first, but I felt it wasn’t any different then moving again. This time I thought maybe I was still going to be alone, just with a bunch of people around. So I just brush it off and played the slightly well matter nephew. When I first met my uncle Dojima in town, I thought he was just being nice since he was my mother’s brother. I didn’t even know I had a cousin name Nanako. She seem super shy of me when we first met. I just kept to myself and didn’t want to scare her. But I still try to get along with her, even if the first few family dinners were kind of awkward at first. 

Then I started school the next day.

Also saw a poor soul crash on his bike, so I leave him be. 

I had a homeroom teacher that hated me the moment he saw me. Or he just hated teenagers all together.

But as soon he called me a loser, I wanted to punch him right then and there. So instead I asked ‘Who are you calling a loser?’ I still remember the look on his face when I said that. I almost wanted to laugh when he said I made it to what he called ‘his shit list’. I did wonder if it was going to get ugly before a girl in green raise her hand and asked if I could sit next to her since the seat was empty. It was a nice save on her part. After school the same girl in green Introduce herself and her best friend to me. Chie and Yukiko. I also sort of met Yosuke that same day before Chie kicked him where it really hurts, but I didn’t know his name till the next day. They were pretty noisy, but I somehow didn’t mind it. Kind of help me relax a little in this small plain town. But it didn’t stay relaxing for long. From murders to rumors to a fantasy like world inside of a TV to finally the Personas. 

Oh, did I talk about a bear name Teddie yet? 

Crazy? I know, but stay with me on this.

Not too long when I move there, two people were murder. A news reporter who was caught in a scandal and a third year student that was going to the same school as me. Yosuke really took it hard after his senpai’s death. I think he had a huge crush on her. But he was pushed enough to wanting to know how and why the rumors of the midnight channel were link together inside of the TV world at Junes. When me and Yosuke went to that world the second time, a bear name Teddie thought we did it. But he asked us to find out who did, that’s when I understood the words that were once said to me by a man with a long nose in a beautiful place cover in blue. A great misfortune will be upon me and it’s up to me to solve it. So I made a promise with Yosuke and Teddie that we solve this case together. 

That’s when we learn the truth to what really happen to the victims. They were killed by their own shadows. I guess you wouldn’t know what shadows are? Shadows are a side that is part of our selves. A side that we either don’t want to know that is there or a side we feel ashamed of. Everyone has one. But if you denied your shadow or wait till the fog disappears on side of the TV world(and the fog is in our world),the shadows will go berserk and kills the host. And the host ends up on our world somewhere, dead. The same thing almost happens to Yosuke and myself. That is till we both unlock a strange power by ‘facing yourself’ called a persona. I guess you can say it’s like unlocking your power from within. I remember how I got my persona. It was different from the others. I heard a voice called out to me and I held a card in my hand. When I felt that power flowing into me, I felt like glass and wanted to break into tiny pieces. It felt insane when I summon Izanagi for the first time. Like being a dream seeing yourself as a superhero. I wonder what the others felt when they summon their personas for the first time? 

Oh yeah, there were more people joining us as me and the investigation team. A delinquent who seems tough on the outside, but really likes cute things on the inside, an Idol who wants be loved for being her true self, and a detective who wanted to be seen as someone who can carry on her family name, not a child playing detective. All we wanted was to catch the murderer and find the truth to all this. We were willing to risk so much by reaching out further and further. And in the end, we found it. We had to face so much hardships, Fighting someone who hid behind the lies they made, and a puppet master who was really pulling the strings behind everything. 

I almost became her puppet. I didn’t want to leave Inaba. I didn’t want to see my friends hurt. I wanted to keep this power of bonds I had. I was willing to turn a blind eye and let the world be cover in fog if it meant staying with my friends and the Dojimas. A woman from the velvet room woke me from my fake world and I snap out of it when she asked me to fight her. I did what she asked of me and while I was fighting her, I face my shadow. I confess to what my true feelings were. The shadow return to me as Izanagi. I defeated Margaret and Marie, a girl who once lost her memories and a part Izanami threw away, beg me to save everyone’s wishes with my power of the world. I unleash it once I face the goddess of death again. Izanagi-No-Okami. The goddess vanish once she understood that mankind’s will can face their own truths, no matter how painful it was. The fog of lies and this case was closed. All of our questions were answered. And we were happy with the truth we found. We all fought like hell for it. 

My point of telling this story to you, is that as time move on, I started to understand myself. I was such a punk who at first didn’t want to get close to anyone out of fear of being disappointed again. And less then a year, I got close to so many people, change my fate so many times and won battles that I didn’t think I would have to face. But now, I’m an author who travels. I went from a child who hated moving to an adult who loved it. I love going around all of Japan to write about places I’ve seen. I was working at a restaurant as a sous-chef. But when my children’s book of the adventures of Kuma-kuma and the golden angel became a hit, I knew I had to head to a different path. And I took it. I think it’s okay to still be yourself and change different paths. Even if they are scary sometimes. There’s a saying my uncle once said, 

‘There’s a lot we rather not see. A lot of grime in the human heart. But if you close your eyes to everything, you can’t even see the people close to you. How can anyone be happy with that? The only thing to do, really, is to keep marching on, straight ahead.’

I wish I can tell you more stories. But I rather let you let them see for yourself. Remember, you’re not alone anymore. And I wish you nothing but a long happy and peaceful life. With every single bond you make as you grow up. Even with the ones who make their own rules or want to question your worth. Show them how you reach out to the truth of facing your shadows.

Many wishes to you, my younger self,

                                                                 Narukami Yu.