#my style has changed soooo much in 2 years. even in just like 6 months its changed so much

[bonkin]

check out this difference yall

first drawing of him ever im pretty sure (2021) to today

[levisblackbabe]

Headcanons of Aot boys with a black gf

Characters: Eren Jeager , Armin Arlert, Levi Ackerman, Connie Springer and Jean Kirstein x fem black reader (separate)

Genre: Mostly fluff, slight angst, deffo crack, (everyone is +18)

Warnings: Language, a bit toxic, slightly suggestive

Wc: 1500+ (Each character is about 300-400 words)

Eren Jeager (The lowkey Toxic one)

· Lowkey scared of y/n because she reminds him of Levi when she is angry, and he knows she will beat his ass if necessary

· Started out as friends but he has always liked y/n

· He initially asked you out as a dare and you only found out after 6 weeks where you broke up 😐

· This legit started the cycle of breaking and getting back together (he never cheated though just a lil bit toxic)

· He is very possessive and controlling which also lead to your break ups

· Even though you have your ups and down he is mostly a good boyfriend

· He plays basketball so every time he is practising on his own, he asks you to be there for rebounds (in reality he just wants you near him baso 24/7)

· Loves your smell so he steals those items might be your lotion, hair products or perfume

· Loves your natural hair and just touches it without permission after a couple times you just gave up telling him off

· He was confused on why you changed your hair so often

· When you guys first started dating you came with box braids rather then your usual bun and he deadass thought you were somebody else 💀he was so confused on why this stranger was touching him up (this mf loyal cuz he was ready to punch you)

· He was soooo scared of meeting your parents (had to call Armin to ask for advice)

· Your family at first didn’t like him cuz of the constant breaking up but they grew to tolerate him (however your older brother doesn’t)

· Loves taking pictures of you during facetime, golden hour or whenever and saves them in a folder (simp)

· Loves your cooking soo much that he goes collect tubber ware of food worth a week and stocks up his fridge

· He loves when you speak to him in another language so he pisses you off so you can cuss him out in your native tongue

· He barely calls your name its either babe or some cringey name like bubbs or something (however if you hear your full name leave his month rip)

Armin Artlet (The simp)

· SHY BAE that’s it

· He was your English tutor and has always had a crush on you

· He wanted to ask you out on a date, but he shy and thought you won’t like white boys

· You asked him instead cuz you fell for his ocean blue eyes (I mean who wouldn’t)

· In the beginning you had to take the initiative a lot cuz he wanted to respect your boundaries but after a while he grew comfortable and took the lead

· He LOVES your natural hair and knows your wash day schedule, so he always offers to help anyway possible

· He was absolutely scared of meeting your family cuz once again he white 😐 however everyone loved him

· He most definitely invited to the family reunion

· Your aunts adore him and they always talking about you as a baby to him

· He always doing late night ft calls with you, and he WON’T hang up cuz he wants to see your face when you wake up

· Armin is a giver, so he always offers to buy thigs for your and just buy gifts at least once a week

· He also loves cooking for and with you (once you had a cooking competition and technically, he is a better cook, but he let you win)

· He likes sending random pictures of things you like and remind him of you

· He happily takes pictures of you (photographer Armin)

· You guys have a pet turtle called Mickey 🐢

· His nicknames for you are beautiful, pretty and stuff like that

· Just overall fluff

Levi Ackerman (the co-worker)

· You guys have been co-workers for 2 years actually

· You thought he hated you but in reality, he does he just acts stingy towards cuz he is Levi 😐 (some serious enemies to lovers vibe)

· He didn’t confess and never would have but due to a drunken Hange letting it slip during a hang out with your co-workers you found out

· He deadass ignored you for a week like if he saw you, he would turn into Houdini and disappear

· However, you once caught him distracted and forced him to talk to you

· Reluctantly so he spoke the truth and asked you out (thought he seemed angry about it)

· Now you guys have happily been dating

· Everyone in your office finds you lucky cuz Levi is the finest man in the office heck the world (if he was real, I would leave my bf 😭)

· He actually has a 5-year-old daughter (DILF! Levi) and told you why he never said anything about his feeling was because you know single dad and shiz

· After 6 weeks you met his babygirl and she is the cutest she loves you considering she never had much of a mother figure in her life

· His daughter is mixed so he knows how to deal with natural hair thanks to YouTube, so he sometimes helps with yours (such a good dad)

· But now that you are here you offer to do any protective styles and give him tips

· Levi isn’t very open, but he expresses his love to you with physical touch, acts of service or gifts

· However, he speaks very softly to his daughter he seems different

· Due to his love language being touch he loves petting your hair (only when you have protective styles) and putting his head on it ( he is tall in my head okay)

· He loves having you in close proximity to you and just somehow touching you

· Him and your dad really hit it off because they both have daughters

· Your aunts are lowkey infatuated with him

· Loves making breakfast for you but due to your busy schedule he just buys your coffee in the morning

· He will never tell you, but he has trouble falling asleep but when you sleepover he actually has a full nights rest (he has silk sheets just for you)

· He might seem closed off, but you know he loves you due to the little things

Connie Springer (the bestfriend)

a/n I just want to say Connie will be of Hispanic heritage for the sake of this headcanon also because all the fanfics I read about him he is portrayed as Hispanic I just write him like this however this isn’t to offend anyone or play onto stereotypes.

· You guys have been besties since freshman year high school

· You hooked up freshman year of college and been dating ever since

· Nothing really changed in your dynamic other than the fact yall kiss and do the deed

· Like you legit call each other insults though Connie likes calling slime and bubbs

· You jokingly calling each other baby mama and baby daddy (manifesting kids but whatever)

· Speaking of kids, you have plushies that you call kids and rotate them around (they are from your arcade date)

· Loves being on call with you when he is playing because it helps calm him down and not break his tv (anger issues much)

· HYPEMAN if you are looking fine asf he will hype you up so much and offer to take pictures for the gram

· You have a joint TikTok account where you reaching 10k and just do dumb couple stuff its cringey but cute (Same goes for your joint spam account where you guys just do silly things together)

· He always asks to do your hair which you repetitively deny keeping in mind last time you let him he nearly ripped off half your scalp

· Late nights drives happen a lot so you can vent and have a heart to heart under the stars, you guys also just vibe to the music and might spend hours in silence looking at the city lights and dancing

· If you fall asleep on him or in the drive back he becomes really cute and soft and just says you are beautiful and that he loves you in Spanish (ugh my heart)

· He only speaks Spanish when he wants to be cute and knows you won’t understand

· Your family have always liked him so when you guys started dating everyone was like ‘FINALLY’ (same with his family)

· Some type of kid’s movie marathon once a month cuz being a child is great

· Its just overall jokes

Jean Kirstein (Mr Doesn’t Give Up)

· Kept asking you out for a year until you gave in, he was so excited he kissed you straightaway

· He was so nervous in your first date, but he was a gentleman opening doors etc (whoever said chivalry was dead 🤨)

· Nearly said I love you on the first date considering he has liked you for a year, but he held it in

· However, he did get a kiss goodnight on the cheek (he was grinning like a fool)

· Loves the fact that you change your hair so much and so often that he happily gives recommendations and offers to help you out

· He is the overprotective type of boyfriend so he was reluctant on you meeting his friends especially Eren, but you reassured him that you wouldn’t be swayed (still icky about you hanging with Eren though)

· He adores playing pc games with you and you have a little family in Sims4 which is cute

· He now has a skincare routine because you introduced him to it (he said he didn’t need one cuz he has a ‘handsome face’ but he secretly started one lol

· He also steals your body lotion and legit smells like you (smh)

· His wrist always has a silk crunchie in case you need it, and, in his car, he has a bag with essentials for you such as pads, edge control, etc

· He calls you cute pet names but also the occasional insults as a joke

· He is lowkey rich, so he happily spoils you to fancy dinners and more

· He also likes going back to the basics so picnic dates in the spring and summer are common he says he cooks them but in reality, it’s his mum

· Your mum absolutely adores him cuz he is a ‘charmer’

· He likes facetiming you when he is working out so he can show up, but you just ignore him and continue doing what you are doing

· Like Eren he has a folder filled of mugs of you

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[songofsaraneth]

Another very busy but very fun couple weeks over here!!!! what a change of pace from the every-day-the-same-blur the last couple months have been.

My parents birthdays are in late June/early July so I went back to Chicago to visit for those + the 4th. It’s been well over a year since I was last at my childhood home and I always miss the lake I grew up on sooooo much. Got to have a nice time kayaking around (pic 1) and enjoying the water lillies and frogs :)))) Also visited my extended family in rural western IL, my uncle is one of the 3 people that make up the towns entire historical preservation society, and they just finished moving/restoring a cute cabin and some equipment from when the area was first settled, which was neat (pic 2). 

On the 3rd I went downtown to hang out with my childhood bffs + partners + my friend’s daughter on a beach on Lake Michigan (pic 3), and its the frist time i’ve been around so many people since 2020 and i’m definitely both rusty on the social skills as well as still feeling weirded out by groups now. It was a really hot day with cold water and good company and food though so while a shock to be back in such a weirdly “normal” setting I did still have a good time. And saw a couple of them again on the 4th at my house, and the neighbors across the lake set off a surprisingly good firework show (pic 4).

I also got to go visit @onionjuggler and her pups (pic 5 & 6 and oops forgot to take any of us together lmao)!!!!!! While this is not actually the first time we have met as we overlapped at the same college (and were both in the campus circus group no less), we reconnected on tumblr last summer bonding over Dragon Age & Mass Effect obsessions and it was soooooo nice to get to hang out irl as a follow up :))))) 

Anyway I spent less than a week back in New Mexico frantically catching up on working + prepping for my following trip this past weekend. Also got to do some baking for a labmate’s post-thesis-defense party, it’s the first time I’ve been able to bake for other people in???? SO long and I missed it. Made doughnut muffins (not pictured) which are delicious but not photogenic and then mini fruit tartlets (pic 7) which taste good and are also very visually show-off-y. Happy to say they were a hit!

Anyway then friday night I drove over to AZ where a photographer couple I’ve worked with a few times before/kept in touch with just moved a few months ago (all the way from New Hampshire). Their new house has a pool so we arranged to do both some figure-on-landscape and figure photography plus also some underwater work! It’s been since last March since my last modeling gig and FOREVER since I’ve gotten to do any mermaid portraits, so it was very exciting to be able to get back to both. Spent the weekend running around jumping on rocks in improbable places with full face makeup + giant lashes lmao (pic 8) and on very little sleep since we were doing sunrise shots as well. I style/advertise myself as an “adventure model” able to get to trickier locations and do harder shoots than the average model, and Jay (the photographer) has done several with me before, so we also went to a location he knew he’d probably not be able to get another model able to reach as it involved an uphill 5 mile technical mountain bike ride followed by a mile of hiking while carrying our giant backpacking bags of camera equipment + outfit/makeup changes + 3 liters of water, all in 95º weather in midday desert sun lmao. The shots turned out SO good though, and I even got to jump in an ephemeral waterfall pool for a bunch of them, and then the mountain bike ride back down was SO fun, though I still had to walk a few bits since no way was I doing some of those technical rocky corners while in a 25lb pack. Bikes & some gear featured in pic 9 :D

Pic 10 is the view from one of the locations we shot at! Involved a technical scramble up the back of a boulder, but looked like a totally sheer face from the front--it’s gonna be super impressive in the final pics. I was wearing a dress made from an old repurposed parashute, so the skirt hangs way down over the rocks and will billow if there’s any breeze, which we did have a bit of. You can see the giant adventure van we roamed around in under a tree in the foreground. I’m really glad I was able to go out and get those because I actually woke up with a migraine saturday night and my rescue meds give me super weird dreams/make me fairly woozy, but luckily the migraine was a fairly small one by my standards and the meds had worn off enough that I could do the climbing stuff safely. But it did mean I only got like 3 hours of sleep after only 2 hours of sleep on friday so I was fairly exhausted. greem.jpg.

And the underwater stuff in the afternoon went really well to!!!! It’s soooo hard to tell if anythings turning out in the moment since you can’t really see on the viewfinder if things are working, but we got some AMAZING stuff I’m super excited to share once he finishes editing. 

Drove home last night (sunday) however there was a HUGE monsoon stormfront. I’m glad becuase we need the rain desperately but for like an hour I had periods of almost no visibility (doing 40mph in a 75 zone with hazards on) and there was up to 2 inches of water on the road surface. So I stopped in a rest stop to nap for 2 hours until it cleared up. But I also hate naps and then slept weird once I got home at 3:30am so now I’m in a weird exhausted haze but also still kinda wired rip. But! Fun times and very much looking forward to a nice hot shower now that I’ve eaten and had an hour to just sit and breathe.

[purplesurveys]

1267

cds.

do you still buy physical copies of cds?  I stopped for many years but recently started again.

have you ever listened to a cd for the first time and loved every track?  I was like this with Petals for Armor, Flowers for Vases, and After Laughter; I’m just a super big fan of anything Hayley Williams and Paramore put out.

name an artist who always comes out with great albums:  I mean I’m gonna be biased and say Paramore...

how long can you listen to a cd without getting sick of it?  I don’t really listen to CDs per se, I guess, so I dunno if I can answer this. When I want to music, and a particular artist, I usually pick a playlist composed of songs from different albums.

do you know any good places on the internet to get free downloads of whole albums?  I wouldn’t be able to refer you to one, come to think of it.

what was the last cd you bought?  My Butter/Permission to Dance set.

have you ever gotten a cd signed by the artist?  Nope.

name cds that are in your car right now or would be in your car if you had one: I don’t keep CDs in my car just because I get my music played by connecting my phone to the Bluetooth; but I believe for the longest time I had a Beyoncé album in the CD slot before I took it out. 

your hair.

describe your hair style:  It’s wavy and layered is the most I can say about it. I don’t style it often.

when was the last time you got a haircut?  Around the start or mid-August, I think? I don’t remember when exactly; but it was very recent.

is your hair the only thing you drastically change?  I never do drastically change it to begin with. The only things I do with it are 1) let it grow out, 2) have it trimmed to my collarbones once a year.

would you rather have brown, blonde, or black hair (not your natural)? I have black hair, but it would be interesting to go brown.

what's the shortest you've ever had your hair?  Up to below my ears.

have you ever had bangs?  I currently have bangs and am more than sick of them already ath this point.

if not, do you plan on ever getting them // if you have them, do you plan on growing them out?  Yeah, for the latter.

fantasies.

what do you fantasize about most often?  How my life could’ve turned out if we weren’t in a pandemic is definitely one of them. Would I have been able to get the same job? Remain in the relationship I used to be in and maybe have even gotten better at handling it? What cities could I have possibly already traveled to with my own money?

if your last fantasy came true, how happy would you be?  That would be traveling to South Korea, and I would be over the moon.

how much do you fantasize?  Mmm not very often since my work takes up most of my headspace. I usually daydream before bed, I think.

or am i the only one who does?  Definitely not.

have you ever told anyone who has been in your fantasy about it?  I mean, I just always tell Angela and Reena that I can’t wait to go to Korea with them. But I don’t fantasize about irls in the way that I think you mean.

would you rather fantasize about your ex or the hottest teacher in your school for the rest of your life?  I don’t ever want to think of my ex in that way anymore and I’m not in school.

do you often find yourself fantasizing about things/people you know you shouldn't?  I mean I will fantasize about certain celebrities but idk if that falls as a should/shouldn’t thing.

your ex.

who did the most damage in your preexisting relationship?  I think we both showed our worst weaknesses towards one another. But by the end of it, I will say she inflicted more damage onto me.

if you were/are single, would you have sex with them?  Um at this point, no. I barely think about sex anyway.

would/did you give this person your virginity? I did. My feelings for her today aside, I don’t regret it; I trusted her in that moment and I wouldn’t take that away from me.

do you still miss the good times with them?  Only in the sense that she used to be my best friend for an extremely long period of time and nearly all the great memories from my past were made with her. do you still talk often? how often?  Oh not at all. I haven’t kept in touch since the last day of 2020. did you make a big deal about the break up?  Yeah, I was definitely the more reactive one and it lasted for a couple of months. She bounced as soon as she got out of the relationship and I wish I had gotten the hint sooner.

how long did it take you to get over them?  Around 6 or 7 months. I really thought it would take so much longer.

if you could tell them one thing, what would it be:  I have nothing to say.

the song you're listening to/the song that's stuck in your head/any song you want to talk about

favorite lyric in the song:  “Where there is hope, there is hardship.”

what is the song?  It’s a song called Sea.

artist:  BTS.

how'd you get introduced to this song?  It was briefly played in one of their docu-series; I just can’t remember which one. Anyway, I instantly took a liking since it isn’t their usual sound, so I wanted to look it up; and it made a lot more sense when I learned it was initially meant to be a solo for one of the members.

if you could perfectly play this on any instrument, which instrument would it be?  Oh this song would be perfect on a violin.

would you have sex with the artist/anyone in the band? Why does everything always revolve around sex for some people?? < LOL same question but to answer it anyway, hahahahaha yes

can you relate to the lyrics?  Not in the manner in which it was written, but I do have my own interpretation of it that I am able to relate with a lot. The song definitely gets me emotional.

name a friend that you think would like it:  Angela, only because I know she already does like it hahaha. In general, though, K-Pop is still quite polarizing so idk if any of my friends outside of the K-Pop bubble would appreciate it.

would you rather have sex to this song or witness your dad singing it to your friends?  Uhm, maybe the latter because I think it would be adorable in a very dorky way

favorite restaurant.

how many times have you been to this place?  Countless times, but they were always with my ex. I need to revisit that place just by myself lol.

where is it located?  It has multiple branches across the metro but the one I used to frequent is the one at UPTC.

when was the first time you came here?  I have no idea but I think the first time was with my mom and siblings actually. A rough guess would be...2016? or maybe 2017.

what's the name of the restaurant?  Yabuuuu.

what kind of atmosphere does it have?  On the sophisticated sidde but still casual and homey, especially since it offers unlimited rice and sides and you can always just call on a server to dump a scoop of rice or lettuce or whatever when you’ve run out of them haha.

does it have a bar? No, but if I remember correctly they do offer a few alcoholic drinks.

have you ever been here for a birthday?  Yes, for my 21st birthday. I went with Angela.

what do you order when you're here?  I get their rosu set, which is katsu with a strip of fat.

are they famous for any drinks?  No.

have you ever gone here with your significant other?  Many times. It was our favorite restaurant.

if it shut down (if its a chain, the entire chain) permanently, how sad would you be?  That would soooo shitty. I’d order a meal everyday until it disappears forever lol.

would you work here?  No. I love the brand, but not so desperately so as to work for them haha.

favorite teacher

(I don’t really have one, but I’ll refer to the first good professor that popped in my head.)

how old is this person?  I have no clue but I would guess he’s anywhere in the mid-20s to early-30s range.

name:  HAHAHAHAHA I don’t actually remember his name anymore...oh no...but he was my prof in my international relations class.

are they married?  I know he has a boyfriend, not sure about his relationship status. That’s not of my business to know.

would you marry them?  Well, no.

do they have kids?  I’m fairly certain he doesn’t.

have you ever seen them out of school?  Not me but I know some of my college friends have. It’s how I heard he has a boyfriend lol.

what's so great about them that makes them your favorite?  He was clearly very passionate about our subject and he was able to explain concepts helpfully and in a way that anybody can appreciate, considering I wasn’t even majoring in the course he taught.

are they more laidback about teaching or strict?  Laidback.

do they run any clubs or coach any sports?  Not that I know of.

what's their personality like?  Approachable, friendly.

if they weren't a teacher, what do you think would be a good profession for them?  Political analyst.

[beabythemountains]

First of all, I want to thank those who did their best to make me look beautiful in this shoot. Will forever be in gratitude to you 💗

Secondly, I want to warn everyone who reads this that I am reserving my right to this post and whoever tries to use this in any way in prejudice against me, without my consent, shall be faced with legal consequences under the Privacy Act of 2012 (RA 10173) and other relevant laws. (I basically chose this platform because I want to be privately open about my experience without having to attack anyone who knows me in social media.)

I guess this is an open letter to people who are yet to open their minds. I wrote this August 21, 2020 after crying about it.

I received the final edits of my photos today. I have a cup of tea beside me, and cases and books on this table I am yet to read (I’m now in my fourth year in a post-graduate course.) But I just needed to pause and think about something for a bit. Today, my heart mourned.

Today was also the day I decided to color my hair back to dark brown/black.

As many people I know know, I work in government service. It has been 2 years and 1 month since I entered. Since entering, I’ve witnessed and experienced my fair share of Filipino government office gossip and, having been raised in a family and having had chosen church friends who do not condone this kind of culture, it has been one heck of an emotional ride and plenty adjustments had to be made. Many deep breaths were taken and many “it is what it is” have been whispered just to get to this level of adjustment I’m in now.

And I think I have finally adjusted to it — you meet different people everyday, you work with different age groups, and you have to adjust to a certain level of response to each different person.

And so, one day, I decided to color my hair purple/violet. Basically, the way people who like to color their hair blonde (or ash or light brown) like to do so, that’s the same way I like to color my hair purple, only in a different color. But aside from that, it’s my favorite color. I like different. I like unconventional. And not that I like it loud, I just don’t like common (similarly to how I am not a fan of mainstream stuff; but I don’t hate it, disclaimer). And it’s not that I decided to do it out of spite or out of a moment. I studied it and thought about it for a long time. I also love research so I enjoyed how I studied it and making it happen. About the color, I’ve always wanted to have purple hair, for aesthetics. The color matches well with green/blue green/pale yellow (actually any pastel color) because of contrast and looks soooo good with white — colors that do not usually compliment my skin color when worn. I’m not really cautious or conscious with what I wear because I’ve always thought that it doesn’t really matter as long as one is comfortable in it and doesn’t really affect people around him/her. I’ve also been very adventurous with my hair — I’ve tried very long, very short, straight, curly, wavy. I just don’t care what other people think of what I do to my hair or what I wear. I mean, it’s just my hair, if you don’t like it then don’t do it to yourself! 😂 What has been stopping me to color it before was just because I do not have the resources. I was only a student, imagining what it would be like to color my hair. And now I have the means to do it!

I studied it. Of course, first of all, I studied if it was prohibited. I researched every manual or regulation I could find about dress code and stuff in the government service. I found that it says in the civil service that with regard to hair, it shall be governed by the internal rules and regulations promulgated by the respective agencies/office. As to our office, there is no such rule or regulation.

So I figured, it was okay. I would not be violating anything. So the next thing I studied was how to do it. I also figured it would be cheaper if I do it at home than have it done at a salon (you know how expensive it is!) I studied it very closely and thoroughly in a way that I can do it successfully in a cheaper way and in the least damaging way possible. All in all, I only spent between 1,100-1,500 pesos to achieve this color at this length and still keep it healthy. And I was successful! It wasn’t perfect (see the colors are not even), but I was really happy. ☺️😊💜 I was very patient with my hair. I did bleach it then rested it for two weeks. Bleached then rested. Bleached then rested, until it’s light enough to have it colored (a total of 6 weeks I think.) I bought hair mask and hair treatment to keep it alive (included in the estimate) so I achieved my violet hair while keeping it healthy.

The first week of going to office with this hair, of course, was fun, and shocking for people. My friends were happy with me and supportive. I was so happy that time. I wake up everyday smiling, filled with joy and ideas of how I can wear my hair. I still got my work done the way I should, everything else is normal and the same, except for my hair. Everyone else also got to do their work the same. I expected also some retaliation. Of course, it’s new! Waaahhh “girl with violet hair!” — stuff like that. But I just laughed at it knowing that I did not violate anything. I tried my best to always keep the mood light when they talk about my hair and I was saying things that they can relate it to like cartoons or anime or kpop, or things that have similar color like rambutan or dragon fruit. Overall, it was a fun week.

The second week, some people started talking to me about changing it back to blonde (I was blonde for a few weeks while I was patient for it to lighten). Some are threatening me that I will receive a memo regarding this. Some are saying it’s bawal daw kasi nasa office ako. It started getting toxic. I know full well I am not violating anything. They also know full well there is no regulation against it. (They tried looking for it too!) When they say “bawal” I just tell them “wala naman pong regulation.” They answer “ehh oo, pero palitan mo na a?” or “first time kasi na may ganyan kaya palitan mo na a?”

Similarly, I was also still able to do my work without my hair affecting my job, or even affecting other people’s jobs. My immediate boss does not really talk to me or react to my hair. She still asks me to work on things to the advancement of our office’s goals and missions. My hair has never been an issue between us.

But gossip still spread like wildfire in the office. I wasn’t speaking much, but the talk continued. By the end of the second week, I’m exhausted from all that I hear. By the end of the week, I received no memo.

Of course, I have a friend I opened this up to because I’m an emotional baby and I would cry about it. I would cry about it because I really love my hair. I would cry about it because I spent so much time and effort and resources in researching, studying, and buying stuff to be able to achieve it. I’m crying over it because I’m not violating anything yet I’m receiving retaliation to the point that people are scaring me to bring it back to normal or blonde out of mere gossip that some people are not fond of it.

My friend, still very supportive and in agreeing that she also does not understand why they are terrorizing me, asked me whether I still think it’s worth it. At that time I answered “YES!” with all vigor because I was just so sure that I wanted this, and it doesn’t really matter because it doesn’t affect my work and the gossip didn’t hurt me too much yet to rid me of my freedom of expression. She’s supportive but worried about me. She knows that I can stand on my decision but worried my emotional self will get hurt by all these.

So I went to office again the third week with purple hair (as you can see I’m interchanging purple and violet in the whole passage because I’m not sure which is which 😂😂), bracing myself for gossip but still keeping my joyous self and keeping my cool. I continued my work, people still stare at me, whisper in my back, and that’s fine with me. I was getting used to my hair being like that that I sometimes forget it’s purple. However, longer (it’s already long) story short, the gossip has gotten worse. And this time, people who were once supportive or once indifferent to my hair color change were suddenly mobbing me. Their comments were loud but without basis. They would say it repeatedly, like a ringing in my head, whenever they see me. Some would even laugh at me, touch my hair then laugh to my face, or even on my back. They would continually scare me saying I would be disciplined, or called to the investigative office, even if I was not violating anything. What they just keep saying is that it’s “bawal” and that it’s the first time they saw something like it in their years of government service.

I felt like I was back in primary school, and in a private one. Which instead of only the kids bullying me, even the teachers are terrorizing me for something I did that wasn’t disallowed in the policy. The people are so loud in my head. They were talking without so much reflection. Was it just out of gossip? Or do they think it’s ugly? Why can’t they just say so? Will the office be hurt? My thoughts were exploding with questions no one provided me the answer to. Imagine one girl against that much noise. Their noise was louder than my hair color, honestly, because people will get used to my hair, but I will forever be marred by how I was bullied by people in my office (AND I’M 24!) It was kind of traumatic. I thought about what my friend asked me: is it still worth it?

So I dyed most of my hair back to a darker color (I left remnants of my colored hair in not-so-seen parts). But I leave these questions for people to reflect on:

* Are we still in a time when hair style, what we wear, or tattoos on our bodies still define how we look at a person? Does it really matter? Does it matter at work? At school?

* How will people be able to express themselves if at the first sight of change, we are hampering it, without understanding it or giving it a chance? Can you imagine how much potential would have occurred or blossomed if we didn’t hamper it?

* Will we keep looking down on youth? Will we always impose hierarchy against young potentials? Will we never open our minds to their views which actually make sense if we just reflect on it?

So I dyed my hair back to dark brown/black. Not because I caved in (or maybe I did). Not for you, but for my peace. I don’t want to go on another day facing judgment and tyranny from people who refuse to open their minds and who I don’t affect AT ALL. I want my peace back.

But I mourn for you. I mourn for all the people who have kept their minds closed. I mourn for all the people who have already experienced such, and I hope that you will not experience it again. I hope your daughters and sons will not experience the same trauma I felt.

I browsed through these edits and, while admiring my hair, I cried a little bit for the people who did not appreciate it and for those against it. I hope I can wake up one day when hair color is no longer an issue in the workplace. And reminder lang din na ang government issues ngayon ay COVID, corruption (pariiiin eh it’s 2020), politicians na hindi nakikinig sa mga taong bumoto sakanila, etc.

Bow. 😊😊😊💜

[chrisbangs]

1-5 and 20-25 :-) sorry for all of them hehehe — 🖤 also i’m getting off work I WILL SEND U ANOTHER ASK HEHEHEH

oaiwenfoia you’re sooo c*te perhaps i’ll d*e………. hm………… anyway;; thank you angel (sorry it took me so long to do this ;; ___ ;;)

also this got mad long so i’ll put it under a cut! 

1. how did you get into graphics / gif making?

i was an early ‘the vamps’ and ‘5sos’ fan and because of that, i used to make lil graphic type things?? i guess?? like i tried to make stuff like the ones i saw online omg… and mine were soooo bad but it was like so fun and i used to use this online editor and it was trash but like i would have so much fun… (and that was back when i was in grade 7-ish..? so i would’ve been like jfjfiwaoefo 12/13) and then i just kept doing it;; eventually in grade 10 i took a graphic design course and i got a hold of photoshop and it blew my mind and from there i just kept kinda… doing it?? 

and with gifs omg… ok i swore i would never make gifs cause it looks SO complicated like bitch ill kill u what do u mean layers to frames wtf !!!!!!!!!!!! and then when i was in my first year of uni in around june i was like… omg i wanna try again… cause i’d tried it before and my ps just crashed… so i was like let me give this another go.. and i did… and it worked.. and my mind was like blown omg… i was in AWE… omg i just realized its been a whole year since i learned how to gif stop ill die 

gfx/gif questions

2. do you do something creative/related “irl” as well?

well!! i just got into college for graphic deisgn hehe;; so i’m hoping that that’ll be my future :’) 

3. who/what inspires your graphics / gifs?

hm, well!! whenever i see really great pieces of gfx or even in real life when i see a magazine piece or a billboard that just looks stunning i feel inspired!! and i’m like eugh i wanna try making smth like that ;; also music and movies and games inspire me sometimes?? but if i was to say who!! then it’d probably be all my amazing content creating mutuals!!! their work is always wowing!! i always tag ppls gfx with ‘gfx inspo’ bc im genuine :0 when i see it ;; ___ ;; like how is everyone so creative and talented;; 

4. what do you enjoy about making graphics / gifs?

oh wow, mm… it allows me to be creative? and put to use skills that i think aren’t always appreciated? like my p*rents never take me doing graphic design seriously;; but then recently my mom wanted me to make a lil label for her for a friend’s garden and i did and she was like !!!!!! so happy abt it i was like TT TT cause both my parents were finally like ok i get it sorta;; i really like that i’m able to make smth kinda outta nothing?? like art is really interesting bc you get to let your thoughts and experiences affect the outcome of your work so?? like.. i like that everyone has a different style?? 

and for gifs;; i really enjoy that its such a structured task like… its very.. orderly and routine based?? like i know what i’m doing everytime?? and the places where i get to change it up are like the colourings and the style of set i make and that makes it fun and creative too;; 

5. what do you dislike most about making graphics / gifs?

mm the creativity block;; i feel like sometimes i cannot think of ANYTHING to make and those days i feel kinda useless as a cc…… it sucks but foiawnefiawn eventually i’ll figure smth out if i move things around enough fajwefowaeo 

and giffing omg…… idk… probably the colouring process…… but thats majorly because my laptop’s screen displays colours kinda whack from how they actually look and so i have to do 2x the work to make sure it looks good and smdays its like idc anymore just post the set and pull the trigger 

20. your favourite fandom(s) to make graphics / gifs for?

for gfx it’s definitely stray kids!!! they have some of the most fun lyrics to work with and their concepts always always inspire me like crazy!!! 

for gifs its the tmg fandom! everyone in that fandom is suuuper nice and supportive and like;; even if i’m not always making gifs i dont feel like i’m falling behind or ? like ppl will be mad or smth ? like its a safe small community and bc of that it feels so good ;;; 

21. how much time do you spend on a single graphic / gif?

very dependent! gfx can take from like an hour to like a week+?? it just depends on how intense and intricate it is ig;; 

gifs are shorter;; probably take me a few hours?? the longest a set has taken me is maybe like 6 hours but that’s bc i was being slow about it and trying to find all the necessary parts! but on average itll take abt half an hour to maybe two for one set

21. what is your biggest improvement since you started making graphics and or gifs?

ogoaiweniogaw stop this is so funny.. i wanna go find my old wattpad covers so you can all cringe with me but… mm, with gfx i guess i learned what my Aesthetic™ was and what i really liked and like fjjfaiosdksfd i learned how to use photoshop which is a big thing lmaoooo……… and with gifs!! definitely my quality (shout out to vapoursynth) and my colouring :’) 

23. what is your biggest improvement in the past month?

hm… time management jfaiweoofiaw i’ve definitely gotten wayyy faster at giffing and i really do not take as much time anymore;; which gives me some peace of mind lmao 

24. what is something that you’re wanting to learn right now?

illustrator! i’ve been fooling around with it a lot recently;; and even one of the pieces i submitted in my portfolio was smth i made on illustrator heh;; but theres a huge learning curve (like btich what is the pen tool ill kill u) fnaoiefiownf so i wanna get lots better with it ;; 

25. what would you like to see others learn how to do?

this is an interesting question;; mm i guess everyone is different?? so idk if i can answer this question cause i think everyone’s style requires them to learn in their own ways?? so idrk ;; i guess something to make certain people’s lives easier would be like LEARN KEYBOARD SHORTCUTS !!! that shit saaaves my life like idk man it cuts down on my time for sure;; 

[zareleonis]

My Star Wars Top 10 of 2018

This year I fell massively in love with Star Wars, learned more about a galaxy far, far away that I ever expected and started this blog, first to liveblog Star Wars Rebels, and later to share my thoughts on whatever new (and old!) Star Wars media I came across. In honor of what, in my mind, was a really fun year for Star Wars, I wanted to share my top 10 list of my favorite Star Wars things that came out this year, across different kinds of media. Read more because it’s really long :P

Honorable Mention: Flight of the Falcon multimedia series (by multiple authors and artists)

Okay, if I’m honest, this gets honorable mention spot, mostly because I felt like putting it in top 10 when it’s really a BUNCH of comics and books would be totally cheating :P One of the more fun things to come out of Solo: A Star Wars Story, this series of loosely connected books and comics whose main connecting factor is the Millennium Falcon (and Bazine Netal’s hunt for it!) is an absolute joy. Cavan Scott knocks it out of the park with the ridiculously fun Choose Your Destiny: A Luke and Leia Adventure. IDW Comics does what’s it does best by bringing together some exciting and unexpected pairs of characters for the last couple months of Star Wars Adventures. In Lando’s Luck Justina Ireland gave us the coolest darn Princess in Star Wars since Leia, Rinetta Gan. And they’re not even done yet, with 2 more comics and Pirate’s Price left to go!

10. Star Wars: Scum and Villainy: Case Files on the Galaxy’s Most Notorious by Pablo Hidalgo

What an awesome and fun book! So much great art, and Pablo Hidalgo always gives 100% with his work. It’s such a creative concept, following Tan Divo and and his descendants, as they report on the criminals and rebels of their day. I completely geeked out over how it gave soooo much neat new information about characters and organizations from ALL OVER the Star Wars universe. It’s an absolute blast!

9. Solo: A Star Wars Story: Tales from Vandor by Jason Fry

This book is AMAZING. Even among the “replica journal” style books that Studio Fun puts out, it stands out as super unique, written from the point of view of the Midnight, the bartender at The Lodge on Vandor (where Han meets Lando), as if he is telling the story to a guest. It’s such a fun outsider’s point of view of Han and the other characters of Solo. The best part though, is the parts of the book that are just a shameless love letter to Star Wars Legends, with nods to stuff like The Wookiee Storybook, LEGO Star Wars: The Padawan Menace and several novels. Jason Fry’s love for the franchise really shines through.

8. Star Wars: Poe Dameron by Charles Soule and penciller Angel Unzueta

This year we said a bittersweet goodbye to Marvel’s monthly Star Wars: Poe Dameron and goodness gracious it was good. Between the Legend Found arc that was to be the original ending and the final The Awakening arc, where Black Squadron is reunited after The Last Jedi, this comic really touched my heart. The last couple pages of issues 25 and 31 still make me cry. :’)

7. Solo: A Star Wars Story directed by Ron Howard and screenplay by Lawrence and Jon Kasdan

THIS MOVIE IS CRIMINALLY UNDERRATED AND I’M MAD AT EVERYONE WHO LET IT FLOP. I’ll admit I wasn’t exactly desperate for a Han Solo Backstory Movie, but Solo was just AWESOME. Just some good, raw, Star Wars-y fun that you can’t help but smile the whole way through. It might not be groundbreaking, but it introduced some super cool characters in L3-37, Qi’ra and Enfys Nest, gave us Maul’s grand triumphant return to the public at large and has INCREDIBLY charming performances by Alden Ehrenreich and Donald Glover as the Han and Lando we all come to love.

6. The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! by Tom Angleberger

If Solo, is good, this kid’s book written to accompany it is even better. I mean, Chewbacca meets K-2SO meets Tooka cats meets teenage bounty hunter/librarian?? On a planet with scary monsters and a spooky evil Force user? Also Cassian is there?? And the daughter of This Funny Hat Dude from Return of the Jedi? Hell yeah!!!!!

The book is hysterical, ridiculously fun and I can’t recommend it enough. I just have to say if you do get it, try and grab the audiobook it’s got a full cast of voices for the main characters including Marc Thompson giving his best Shyriiwook as Chewbacca. I laughed so hard I cried at the narration and a K-2SO’s lines done out loud. You won’t regret it!

5. Star Wars: Women of the Galaxy by Amy Ratcliffe and eighteen awesome artists!

THIS is one of the coolest Star Wars books out there and a celebration of all the women we know and love (and sometimes hate) in a galaxy far, far away. It’s such a wonderful collaboration, created by all women (& non-binary) artists and author. I love that it’s got characters from practically everything—movies, books, comics, video games, you name it! We even got to see characters like Jas Emari for the first time which makes me SO HAPPY. it’s one of the books I come back to all the time just to flip through it and enjoy the illustrations.

4. Star Wars Resistance created by Dave Filoni and executive produced by Athena Yvette Portillo, Justin Ridge, and Brandon Auman

I LOVE RESISTANCE SO MUCH!! I didn’t quiiite know what to expect with the new animated series, but was super excited and it hasn’t disappointed one bit. It’s such a fun show and really enjoyable to have a Star Wars show that is almost just ‘slice of life’ compared to the others. The animation is so cool to me and the characters really cute. I’m ridiculously charmed by all of them, especially our main man Kazuda Xiono and really hyped to see where these characters go. It’s more happy and fun than anything, but I know it will break my heart to pieces soon enough (KAZUDA XIONO. HOME PLANET: HOSNIAN PRIME). I hope more people give it a chance because it really is awesome!

3. Star Wars Adventures: Tales from Vader's Castle by Cavan Scott and various artists

LET THIS BE MY LOVE LETTER TO CAVAN SCOTT AND ALL THE COOL AND AWESOME STUFF HE’S DONE WITH THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE!! I was soooo excited when these came out because it’s such an AWESOME idea, I mean? Star Wars Horror story one-shots connected by a wider plot??? YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Doubly so when they star Lina Graf, of the Adventures in Wild Space series by Cavan Scott and Tom Huddleston. I was soooo excited to see her again and it’s amazing to see how she’s grown from a young kid to a brave and capable pilot and Commander in the Rebellion.

Then the individual stories are just awesome. It was a joy to see Kanan and Hera back together again after Rebels (or, well, pre-Rebels). The Dooku story was just amazing and such an enthusiastic tribute to Christopher Lee as Dracula. The Frozen inspired Han and Chewie story was also pretty great and I LOVE that it referenced the events of The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! And, my personal favorite story, the spooky ewok story featuring a young Chief Chirpa and Logray was brilliant and I enjoyed getting a closer first-hand look at ewoks (something we don’t have much of, at least in canon!). All in all just an absolute masterpiece in my book and a great reminder of why IDW Comics’ Star Wars stuff has been so freaking awesome.

2. Join the Resistance: Attack on Starkiller Base by Ben Blacker and Ben Acker and illustrated by Annie Wu

I’M BACK AT IT YELLING ABOUT WHY MORE PEOPLE NEED TO CARE ABOUT THESE WONDERFUL, CHARMING LITTLE KIDS’ BOOKS!! This was such a perfect end to the J-Squadron kids’ story. To me, this series is such a hidden gem and I really hope more people give it a chance. It was wonderful how all the characters’ stories closed out. I loved seeing Jo finally openly defy his parents, Mattis putting his faith in the Force and his friends, the return of Klimo, AG-90 and Dec fighting as brothers but growing stronger for it, and Lorica becoming the hero everybody thought she was. There’s so many fun cameos, from Rey, to Hux to Poe and Black Squadron, with the backdrop of the actual climactic battle in The Force Awakens.

And, one thing I really want to talk about that I love, is how the book (in tandem with the first two) give us the first gay character in a Star Wars kids book, with Dec Hansen. I wish they could’ve said it a bit more explicitly, but we actually got the kid and his friends talking about it in the books? And, with most of the LGBT characters falling more on the “scum and villainy” circles of the galaxy, it’s so refreshing to see a brave and unambiguously heroic gay teenage starfighter pilot trainee. Like, holy shit that actually happened!!!! ANYWAYS READ THIS SERIES I LOVE THEM AND YOU SHOULD TOO.

Oh, also, Annie Wu’s illustrations are AWESOME and I hope she does more Star Wars stuff (Pirate’s Price, out in a week!)

1. Star Wars Rebels created by Dave Filoni, Simon Kinberg and Carrie Beck

I don’t think there’s way I could place anything but Rebels at #1. This show changed my life in so many ways and I’m just. ridiculously thankful it exists. without Rebels, I wouldn’t have this blog, I wouldn’t be up to my ears obsessed with Star Wars and I there’s so many friends I wouldn’t have either. It’s touched my heart in a way that.... gosh I don’t know if I can even think about anything that resonates with me quite in the way Star Wars Rebels has. Pretty sure most if not all of my followers have seen Rebels, haha, but if you haven’t. You won’t regret it. Well, you might. It hurts. I hate to say, but it does. But even if the end destination leaves you heartbroken and uh prone to randomly bursting into tears about it, you will never regret the journey. Everything I learned and experienced with Ezra, Kanan, Hera, Sabine, Zeb and Chopper is beyond precious to me and I’m thankful it exists because it made my year in so many ways.

[deardeartaylorswift]

1. What’s your middle name?

Don’t have one!

2. What are you listening to right now?

I’m watching Queer Eye lol

3. What was the last thing you ate?

Frozen Yog

4. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

My business partner

5. Do you drink?

Maybe once a month

6. Do you smoke?

Nope, never liked it

7. What is the first thing you noticed in someone?

Their smile and eyebrows lol

8. What is your hair color?

Brown

9. What is your eye color?

Brown

10. Do you wear contacts/glasses?

Glasses when I spend too much time starting at my laptop (for work reasons)

11. Dogs or cats?

Dogs but I love cats too

12. What’s your favorite animal?

Dogs

13. What’s your favorite television show?

Game of Thrones

14. What’s your favorite movie?

I always struggle with this question.

Probably Titanic and Les Mis... so dramatic, I know.

15. What’s your favorite band/singer?

LOVE The Killers

Adore Harry Styles

My obsession is Taylor Swift

Matisse, so good!

Guilty pleasure: Fedez

16. How old are you?

23

17. Do you have a crush on anyone?

Not at the moment

18. What’s your sexual orientation?

Straight, sadly.

19. What’s your favorite color?

Black

20. What was your most embarrassing moment?

An employee opened the bathroom door at the train I was peeing at. Right when I was pulling my panties up... there was a line waiting... three guys saw me. I cried and yelled at him, I was soooo embarrassed. 

21. Do you ever wish you were someone else?

Sometimes I daydream about having someone else’s life but not being them.

22. What were you like when you were a kid?

Pretty calm on the inside but my brain would go crazy and try to do 100 things at the same time. I still am like that.

23. What would your dream house be like?

Boho decor, lots of plans, with a biiig backyard so I have space to throw day parties there and picnics, also I want my dogs to have lots of space to run.

24. What last made you laugh?

Joking with my coworkers

25. What is your favorite word?

Pericoloso (dangerous in italian) 

26. What is your least favorite word?

Encamorrado (that feeling when you just woke up and you’re still sleepy)

27. What turns you on?

Guys who are not afraid to show their emotions or show their sensitive side

28. What turns you off?

Mean people

29. What is your star sign?

Leo

30. What are your favorite books?

99 ways to say I love you

31. Do you have any siblings?

2 brothers

32. Do you like to dance?

yes!!!

33. What is your definition of cheating?

not being truthful to your partner, spiritually, mentally and phisically. 

34. Have you ever cheated on someone?

Nope

35. Do you regret anything?

Yes

36. Do you have any phobias?

I don’t know if it can be categorized as a phobia but I’m always afraid when I travel on the road, like on a bus. I 100% much rather take a plane.

37. Ever broken any bones?

Nope

38. Ever come close to death?

Maybe

39. What is your religion, if any?

Catholic but I don’t practice

40. Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist?

Yes

41. Are looks important in a relationship?

i think finding your partner attractive is important. I don’t think you should be looking for someone who is beautiful according to your personal standards, I believe when you are in love with someone you automatically find them attractive. So, I guess no. 

42. Are you more like your mom or your dad?

Like my dad.

43. What is your favorite season?

Fall

44. Do you have any tattoos?

3

45. Do you have any piercings?

1

46. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

1 boyfriend

47. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

HAHAHA LOTS OF THEM

48. Who is your celebrity crush?

Leo Dicaprio, Harry Styles, Matt Bomer

49. Are you a virgin?

Yes

50. Do you get jealous easily?

No

51. What is your favorite type of food?

Mexican and Italian

52. Do you ever want to get married?

Yes, someday

53. Who was your first kiss with?

Humberto

54. Have you ever been cheated on?

No

55. What is your idea of the perfect date?

Outdoors movie and picnic

56. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

introvert 

57. Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets?

Yes, it’s ridiculous to think we are alone in the universe.

58. What talent do you wish you’d been born with?

Singing and learning easily how to play instruments

59. What is your saddest memory?

The time when my mom had cancer

60. Do you believe in love at first sight?

I love dogs at first sight

But humans?... no. Attraction? yes but love.. i doubt it.

61. Do you believe in soul mates?

Yes but not in this platonic you have one soulmate in your life kind of thing. I believe friends and family can be our soulmates. I believe they are rare and you’re lucky to find them. I believe partners can be your soulmates too and it’s ok if you don’t end up with them because they were the soulmate of the person you were in that period of time. 

62. Have you ever dyed your hair?

Yes, I did the Californian thing a few years ago. 

63. Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you?

Yes, only once that I know of and it fucking hurt.

64. Would you go against your moral code for money?

nope

65. What are three things most people don’t know about you?

I love writing poetry

Sometimes I wish I was an actress

I hate olives

66. Who are you jealous of?

I don’t think I’m jealous of anyone

67. Do you sleep with a stuffed toy?

Never have

68. How long was your longest relationship?

8 months lol

69. Is the glass half empty or half full?

Half full

70. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

neck kissing

71. Who is your most loyal friend?

you know who you are

72. Are you in a relationship?

nope

73. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

74. Are you a bad person?

no

75. Are you a lover or a fighter?

what in what context

76. What did you do on your last birthday?

Cry lmfao

77. What is your favorite quote and why?

We have done so much with so little for so long that now we can do anything with nothing forever. 

78. If your best friend died, what would you do?

she’s my soulmate, I would literally be broken

79. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

My eating habits lol

80. If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do?

spend the day with my fam and friends and EAT A LOT.

81. What is the strangest dream you’ve ever had?

It’s so wrong I can’t even write it here

82. Are you happier single or in a relationship?

I don’t think happiness should be based on your relationship status. I’m almost always happy.

83. Who were you in a past life?

probably like a free happy hippie kind of soul

84. What is your happiest childhood memory?

Pool days with the fam

85. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

Yes. I’ve been on both sides.

Sucks to not be loved back and sucks to not be able to love back someone.

86. Have you ever had an imaginary friend?

Nope

87. If you were the president, what would you do?

GUN CONTROL.

88. What is your ideal career?

Design and that’s what I did.

89. What is your political affiliation?

90. Are you conservative or liberal?

Liberal

91. Is the male or female body closest to perfection?

what? every body is perfect.

92. Do you like kissing in public?

no!

93. If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change?

evil

94. Where would you like to live?

Italy

95. Where would you go on your dream vacation?

Thailand

96. Describe yourself in one word.

Joyful

97. Describe yourself in one sentence.

She talks like june and she walks like rain.

[bethhxrmon]

All the even ones!!

Aaaahh alrighty then!

2. Best moment of the year?

Oooh definitely finding out I’m an alternate for All Northwest Orchestra and getting to go to Portland! Pretty damn awesome if you ask me

4. what was the biggest change you experienced this year?

It’s gonna probably sound kinda dumb but getting dumped put a major shift in my year. Mainly because it had been well over a year soooo yeah it changed a good deal.

6. Best album of the year?

That’s a toughie, but I’ve listened to the Crazy Rich Asians soundtrack a ton since it came out and it also came out this year so??? I’m counting it but I listen to lots of music.

8. best book/book series of the year?

It didn’t come out this year, but I read The Color Purple and it’s actually an amazing read and that’s the first time I’ve cried over an ending because of how good it was.

10. how was your love life this year?

Ooooof I got dumped sooooo…. yeet

12. biggest regret of the year?

Not telling my, now ex, boyfriend that I knew he was gonna dump me, like, a month before it happened. Like, just my general dumbassery and ignoring issues that I think I’m looking at too much

14. favourite place you travelled this year?

Probably California to see family during Thanksgiving. It’s just a really nice area in the fall and all the leaves and stuff. Plus I got pomegranates and lemons so that ruled!

16. did you learn anything about your sexuality this year?

Well, I confirmed I’m not a fan of having sex, but I also confirmed that I also have feelings for girls and guys.

18. what surprised you the most this year?

That I actually really love figure skating??? Like, ask my friends who dealt with me during the winter olympics, I was soooo psyched after seeing some of the routines and I couldn’t stop

20. how did this year treat you in general?

In a lot of ways, it kinda treated me like a piece of garbage. But I also met so many awesome people soooo that was pretty awesome.

22. has your fashion style changed this year?

I have more leggings, and some more hoodies. I also really like cardigans. I want more oversized sweaters tho.

24. who has made the biggest impact in your life this year?

Oh gosh, too many to count, honestly!

[chronicles-of-a-paper-heart]

I know everyone says it, but I’m still gonna say it too. How is it already July??* Where did the first half of the year go? Time is going by so fast. So, yes, I’m freaking out about that and to celebrate that I’ll be doing the Mid Year Book freak Out Tag. It’s fun to look back and see what books I’ve read this year so far and how I liked them etc.

*It’s August now because it took me nearly a month to finish this post … don’t ask me, I have no idea why

And because I like stats I’ll start with a few general numbers. I’ve read 55 books so far* (July 10th) and I want to read 91 books this year. So I’m on track.

16 x 5 Stars 20 x 4 Stars 12 x 3 stars 6 x 2 stars 1 x 1 Star

*Edit: 69 books as of right now (Aug 16th) .. but I’m too lazy to count all the books rating again …

Which is an average rating of 3.8 Stars. So I’d say that’s quite good. (I am in a middle of changing my rating system though. I’m usually quite generous with my rating and have rounded up quite a few books. I want to change that because I feel the books I really really loved don’t get the recognition they deserve this way. )

But without further ado let’s jump into the questions.

Question Number 1: Best Book You’ve Read So far In 2018

That is a really hard question and I don’t think I can narrow it down to just one. So here are my four favorite books:

Question Number 2: Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far In 2018

I … I haven’t … did I really just read 5 sequels so far?? That’s … Well, one of my goals this year was to finish more series than I start but obviously it’s not going so well. But of those five the winner is probably Ice like Fire or any of the three Gregor books I’ve read, honestly. Actually, it’s the Gregor books because I rated them all 4 or 5 stars.

Edit: I am currently reading Avenged by Amy Tintera and I’m really enjoying that one so far. Edit 2 (Aug 16th): I still haven’t finished Avenged. But I’ve read the second Artemis Fowl novel (The Arctic Incident or something) and I really loved that one, so …

Question 3: New Release you haven’t read yet but want to

Oh, so many! A Thousand perfect notes. I just bought that one a few days ago and am soooo excited to start it. The cover is mesmerizing and I’m all for finally reading something that Cait has written. Also, the premise sounds amazing. Other than that, I am quite pumped to finally read Queens of Fennbirn and A Court of Frost and Starlight. Both are novellas in series I enjoyed very much so I have no clue why I haven’t read them yet. I definitely need to in August. I’ll try to fit them both into my N.E.W.T.s TBR

Question 4: Most anticipated release for the second half of the year

That’s easy! Kingdom of Ash (though I’m scared!!) and Vengeful. Can’t wait for either of them. I’m not ready for the Throne of Glass series to end but I can’t wait any longer either. And I loved Vicious so ridiculously much and am so curious to see what happens next and if V manages to swap my sympathy from Victor to Eli. Oh, and look at those covers! Yes, I’m shallow like that.

Question 5: Biggest disappointment

Black Bird of the Gallows. This one was a bit of a disappointment. The cover is gorgeous, but the story is weird, to say the least. I won’t forget it that soon that’s for sure. But the romance was lacking, too quick and the chemistry just not there and the ending ruined it for me. I don’t like too clean endings. (It was honestly a little ridiculous.) Another one is The Oddling Prince. I have a review up if you’d like to know more about my thoughts. I hoped for it to be a quick read, something I would get addicted too and fly through. But I struggled so hard to finish it. I didn’t really like any of the characters, maybe one. The story didn’t interest me that much and the writing style got on my nerves. So, that was quite disappointing.

Question 6: Biggest surprise

The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue. I thought this wouldn’t really be my type of book. I heard it was light and funny and while I enjoy books like that from time to time they never come near my favourite shelf. But I was pleasantly surprised by this one. I loved the writing style, the characters were fleshed out, unique and funny. Monty was an idiot but a lovable one. And it had way more depth than I expected along with some great, deep lines. Loved it. Clockwork Angel also surprised me because I really didn’t like the first three books in The Mortal Instruments series and I thought this was a solid 3-star book right after finishing it. But something about it stuck with me and I really, really want to continue the series. I don’t know what exactly grabbed me like that but it did. And last but not least, Leaving Time. I hadn’t expected the book to make me feel this many different emotions. It’s not the type of book I usually read, but maybe I should more often. This was fantastic and emotional and heartbreaking.

Question 7: Favourite new author (debut or new to you)

Laurie Halse Anderson and Seanan McGuire. I wanted to read a book by Laurie Halse Anderson for forever and I finally did last month. I read and loved Wintergirls. It’s a haunting tale about a girl struggling with an eating disorder while also trying to comprehend the death of her best friend. Truly amazing and I’m so excited to read more from her. Every Heart a Doorway was soo good and could also be an answer to the biggest surprise. I know this book is hyped but I was hesitant to pick it up as it is quite short and maybe also because of the hype. I didn’t want to dislike it. Shouldn’t have worried. I fell in love and can’t wait to pick up Down Among the Sticks and Bones.

*Edit (Aug 16th): I read DatSaB and loved it. Those books are so magical and suck you right in, even though they’re incredibly short

Question 8: Newest fictional crush

This one is way harder to answer than I thought. I don’t think I have a real new fictional crush. Will from The Infernal Devices might evolve into one. Same with Simon from Furyborn. Or actually, Rielle from Furyborn. Liked her quite a lot. I really like Theron in Snow like Ashes but that changed after Ice like Fire … Cas from Ruined is nice, but … yeah. So, sorry. Not really much of an answer.

Question 9: Newest favourite character

Monty probably. I also really love Rielle (Furyborn) and Emelina (#stabby) from Ruined. Meira is quite interesting to read about. Oh, I know! Kippa, the little fox from Montress Vol 1. She is the cutest thing eva!!

*Edit (Aug 16th): I read this book in August, but: The Murderbot from All Systems Red … Could relate way too much. Loved him and the book

Question 10: Book that made you cry

Easy. A Monster Calls. A book has to pack quite punch to make me cry and I cried really hard when reading this. Such a great story and beautifully narrated by Jason Isaacs (I read along so I could also see the beautiful illustrations) And Gregor and the Code of Claw. My heart broke! In a million tiny pieces and I, still, don’t know how to deal. That was absolutely devastating and I loved it so much! I read this to my friend while she visited me. It was her 5th time reading it but she still cried. Trust me, this series is sooo good.

Question 11: Book that made you happy

The little Ghost because I loved this book as a kid and it’s just so cute. Every Heart a Doorway because I loved every second of this book and it had a perfect atmosphere. Leaving Time because my mom got me this as a gift and I loved it. It wasn’t a book I would ever pick for myself so it made me even happier that I loved it so much. The parts about the elephants were sad but they made me happy at the same time.

Question 12: Favourite book to film adaptation you saw this year

Well … ehm … I haven’t watched a single adaptation this year? So … no answer for this one.

Question 13: Favourite review you’ve written this year (Booktube version: Favourite video you have done so far in this year)

Snow like Ashes by Sara Raasch

This review captures my thoughts on a lot of books, actually. How I enjoy a book really much while reading and later, when thinking more clearly about it, remembering more and more things that weren’t the best. I struggle to rate books like that. How much do I factor my enjoyment into my rating? I mean, I read for enjoyment, so … but I still have to acknowledge all the not-so-great things, don’t I?

Question 14: Most beautiful book you’ve bought so far this year (or received)

     Question 15: What books do you need to read by the end of the year?

A LOT! EVERYTHING! But I want to read all the books I own from Walter Moers, Mark Lawrence, Leigh Bardugo and V.E. Schwab. I also plan to read all the Harry Potter illustrated editions. And I’ll have a list of 18 books I want to read in the rest of 2018 up soon-ish.

  This tag was a lot of fun even though it took me ages to do. But it so interesting to look back at the last 6 (7) months of reading.

What was your fav book of the year so far? Biggest disappointment? What book are you dying to read? Tell me in the comments!

(Not-So) Mid-Year Book Freak Out Tag I FINALLY got around to formatting this and am posting this quite late ... but oh well. Hope you like it. I know everyone says it, but I'm still gonna say it too. How is it already July??* Where did the first half of the year go?

[benjamingarden]

This Month On The Farm: September 2020

September officially marks the end of summer and I am tomato'd out!  As noted in previous posts, it was a toasty one here this year, as it was for so much of the country, so I am very much ready to move on to the next season.  Bring on the pumpkin spice everything (yes, I am THAT person).

Starting last week our walks around the yard consist of a crisp crunching under our feet.  Our trees are not only changing to their fall colors but are also shedding them quite quickly thanks to some much needed rain.  And so, leaf raking season begins.

I am still toggling between hot and iced coffee, depending on the day.  We've two had days of almost frost and more opportunities are on their way.  I celebrated fall by ordering two new sets of our very favorite flannel sheets from LL Bean.  We replace our well used sheets every few years.  They are expensive but honestly the BEST flannel sheets we've tried.  With the bitter cold winter temps we receive for 5 months of the year, it's well worth it.

Jay also finished building both a food storage pantry space in our basement plus and large pantry shelving unit to go behind the door that leads to the basement.  This has really allowed us to stock up nicely.

Putting Food Up

With the summer garden completed the fall garden is focused on winter squash, green beans, cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, greens, and beets.  Food preservation is mostly complete.  I planted way too much cabbage so I was able to shred quite a few heads, blanch and then freeze them.  It will be perfect for soups, stir fry's, and unstuffed cabbage casserole.  I've left a few heads in the garden to use up before the first freeze is on the horizon.

I was successful in getting enough green beans for plenty of fresh eating and enough leftover for the freezer.  My goal was a minimum of 20 servings in the freezer and I believe I will make it.  Good thing I planted more late summer!  I was also successful in keeping up with the tomatoes.  I think I only lost 4 or 5 to rot, getting the others either tossed in the freezer for future processing or processed on the date of picking.  We have a ton of tomato sauce, spaghetti sauce, and oven-roasted cherry tomatoes for sauce, pizza, pasta dishes, etc.  I'm planning to grow greens into the winter so I haven't worried about getting those put in the freezer.  I've already roasted and froze some pie pumpkins and winter squash.    My husband's favorite stuffed jalapenos are in the freezer along with 10 bags of sliced bell peppers and 4 bags of roasted poblano peppers ready to stuff or use in soups or enchiladas.

Also in the freezer I have some bags of corn, mixed vegetables (green beans, carrots, corn and onions), corn salsa (corn, poblano peppers, and onions) as well as mirepoix (celery, onion, carrots) for soup making.  We have 6 bags of frozen strawberries, 4 bags of frozen blackberries, and 6 bags of frozen shredded zucchini for future baking.  Speaking of baking, we have many loaves of zucchini quick bread, a couple batches of chocolate zucchini cake baked as cupcakes, and quite a few batches of chocolate chip zucchini muffins and zucchini crumble muffins all in the freezer.   Those recipes are so moist that they freeze perfectly.  I've also been making a ton of homemade chicken stock.  We buy whole chickens from a local farmer friend and I cut them up and make stock with the carcass.  I freeze the stock in mason jars for use during soup and stew season.  

Good thing we now have 3 stand-alone freezers!

In the cupboard we have canned pickled jalapeno slices, cucumber relish, salsa, tomato jam, and enchilada sauce.  We dried garlic, onions, elderberries, herbs, and pumpkin seeds, and harvested over 20 pounds of sweet potatoes that are cured and stored away.

In The Coop

Feathers.  Feathers everywhere.  That's what you'll find in the coop.  We have hit molting season so every morning it looks like the Coop Girls had a pillow fight the previous night.  Unfortunately this also means they are laying very few eggs.  In the years past we would have added new girls in spring so they would be laying while the older girls are molting but not this year.  Because we're working on reducing our flock size we won't have younger girls laying during molt season for a few more years.  So, we've increased their protein to help their aging bodies with the change and wait for their new feathers to emerge.

Oliver

Oliver is acting a lot more like Emerson now.  We noticed this about 6 months after Emerson, Ollie's brother/litter mate, passed away almost 2 years ago.  He never used to be interested in food much at all whereas Emerson was obsessed with food.  Well, Oliver is now obsessed with food.  This isn't a bad thing, necessarily, because at least he eats without much effort now.  It's just very funny to see the transition.  Despite him taking on Emerson's food obsession, he's still sensitive and quirky Oliver who requires sticking right by my side, has a dislike of trash cans, shakes when the vacuum cleaner is running, and absolutely detests all white trucks and minivans (both of which the only neighbor that he can see has).

I am taking full advantage of the last of the nice days to keep my sensitive little man preoccupied.  Because he is truly glued to my side all day, I can keep him (somewhat) happy if the temps are relatively warm and there is sunshine on the deck.  So, I lure him outside whenever I can and race to get as much accomplished indoors as possible before the barking to be let in begins.

What I've Been Reading

I've actually had time to read!  I'm so happy since I absolutely adore getting lost in a book.  So my evenings and early mornings were spent with a cup of (herbal) coffee and a book.  The first few books I've read are memoirs about country living or homesteading and I've thoroughly enjoyed each of them.  

So far I've read (affiliate links):  Follow Me To Alaska, by Ann Parker, Woodswoman: Living Alone In The Adirondack Wilderness by Anne LaBastille, Homestead, by Jane Kirkpatrick, Good Husbandry, by Kristin Kimball, Mud Season, by Ellen Stimson, Winds Of Skilak, by Bonnie Rose Ward, The Feast Nearby: How I Lost My Job, Buried A Marriage, And Found My Way By Keeping Chickens, Foraging, Preserving, Bartering, And Eating Locally On $40.00/Week, by Robin Mather, and Flat Broke With Two Goats, by Jennifer McGaha.  

My favorites were Good Husbandry, Follow Me To Alaska, and The Winds Of Skilak (and the follow-up book).

I also read a few fiction books in September.  My favorites have been (affiliate links): The Tourist Attraction, by Sarah Morgenthaler, The Year Of Pleasures, by Elizabeth Berg, and The City Bakers Guide To Country Living: A Novel, by Louise Miller.  I thoroughly enjoyed each of these - the writing styles, the fluidity, the characters and how they were developed, and the stories themselves.

Jackson, my meal planning assistant....

Stews, Soups, And Casseroles, Oh My!

I adore the change of season not only because of the weather but also because of food.  I've started to put soups, stews, and casseroles on the menu and am back to making bread.  These are all comfort foods for me and I happily anticipate making them every year.  Fresh corn soup, roasted tomato soup, veggie stew with biscuits (chicken added to Jay's), chili and cornbread, and oatmeal honey bread for breakfast have all made their way to our table.  

Speaking of meals, I've settled into monthly menu planning which is easiest for me since we are so well stocked up.  You can see October's meal plan (dinner only) in the photo above.  If there are 2 listed then I'm making something different for Jay and I.  You'll also see that I don't mind eating the same thing more then one day a week which also saves me time at dinner prep.  Jay is not a fan so he eats his leftovers at lunch.

What We've Been Making

Our farmer's market has remained somewhat busy as we're still getting quite an influx of locals and tourists.  So many things have changed this year that we have no idea what to expect from one week to the next.  One thing that does stay the same though are our seasonal products, and our fall line is finally out!  It's my absolute favorite group of soaps: Pumpkin Crunch Cake, Apple & Sage, Cinnamon & Raw Honey, Chai Tea Latte, and Pumpkin Cheesecake smell soooo delicious.  We've just made the winter soaps as well which will be available the beginning of November.

That's September around the homestead!

This Month On The Farm: September 2020 was originally posted by My Favorite Chicken Blogs(benjamingardening)

[vrenaewrites]

CRAVE by Tracy Wolff thoughts: Chapter 0 - 21

Full video here.

In which a mortal girls goes to her uncle’s boarding school after the death of her parents, and finds it full of creatures.

CH 0 for some reason: if you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space

“Try my hardest not to freak the eff out” - if you’re gonna use expletives, use them

Immediate info dump of “if you’d told me two months ago i was gonna be in fairbanks alaska to get a puddle jumper to denali, the highest mountain point in north america” 

CH 1: landing is just throwing yourself to the ground and hoping you don’t miss

I thought these quotes were weird self help quotes but then i realized they were probably the chapter titles

The fog is referred to as “civil twilight” - this weirded me out because civil blood and twilight, idk if this is a real thing? Will look it up if i remember: it is the brightest of the 3 twilight phases and it is ABUNDANTLY clear that she added the civil part to not make it straight up twilight because this book is unwitting twilight satire

He tells her it’s a short runway “because it’s hard to keep a long one clear of snow or ice for any amount of time” HE’S IN THE MIDDLE OF LANDING A PLANE ATM BRO WE DON’T NEED ALL OF THAT INFO ATM

Grace is kind of funny if not a little cheesy

“Textbook landing” - maybe if that textbook is a horror novel he’s reading upside down and backwards - i don’t know if by listening to this i’m missing the line breaks and short sentences that would make this funny, so if i am lemme know but if she didn’t break this up it’s clunky

Her uncle is headmaster of the boarding school she’s being sent to

“Despite being a year younger than my own 17 years” - did you not read this out loud? Did no one hear how redundant that was?

“According to wikipedia, heeley - hailey? - has only one major road” she’s mentioned google and wikipedia at this point and idk if i’m the only one who finds that type of thing annoying af

“In weather that’s 20 degrees below freezing, if the app on my phone can be believed” THIS IS SO ANNOYING

“The insulated helmet will keep you warm as well as protect your head if we crash” yes macy we know what helmets are and also insulation, again the redundancy

CH 2: Just because you live in a tower doesn’t make you a prince

“Is that kadmere academy?” i shout - not, is that it? They’re on a snowmobile, with helmets on, and macy understood her...and she understood macy saying they’d be there in five minutes

She couldn’t google the academy

“I half expected quasimodo to be waiting for us when we got there”

It may be a castle but at least there’s no moat or dragon

Macy has short rainbow-colored hair

She’s wikipedia’d and googled her life away but didn’t expect to not be able to breathe since she’s coming from sea level and is now up in the mountains - i’m from florida and even i know what altitude sickness is

She sees a flash of red in the window “i don’t know who it is or why they even matter” ...what does that mean?

But she doesn’t see them when she looks back and she’s disappointed, which she acknowledges makes no sense…

“I should be bowing and scraping right about now”

It’s a castle with an xbox and giant flat screen, and they have wifi AND cell service up in the desolate mountains. I went to cossayuna - 476 feet above sea level, 7 miles from a town - and NONE of us had cell service the entire time

She picks up a chess piece and it’s a carved vampire, then a dragon

Then she comes face to face with the most intimidating guy i’ve ever seen, not just because he’s hot, there’s something different and powerful though i don’t have a clue what it is”

Face too intense to be beautiful, skyscraper cheekbones????, red lips, stone-cutting jaw, bottomless obsidian eyes, obscene lashes

Trapped by his stare, hypnotized by the sheer magnetism rolling off him in waves

“Annoyance flashes through me”

He’s blocking her view of anything else - did he step between her and the chess board?? Confusion, but because of this she has to look at his long lean body

“Double-wide shoulders” gross

“Nothing to do but admit that this boy is sexy AF - a little wicked, a lot wild, and all dangerous”

“Seriously, when exactly did i become the heroine of some YA romance? The new girl swooning over the hottest, most unattainable boy in school?”

CH 3: vampire queens aren’t the only ones with a nasty bite

He quotes hamlet to her, and she corrects him for fucks sake

“I warned your uncle you wouldn’t be safe here, but he obviously doesn’t like you much”

“Welcome to alaska?” “more like welcome to hell, now get the fuck out”

“Ignoring the pterodactyls flying around in my stomach” - this is a great line if it didn’t take you completely out of the action, which it does

This whole exchange about big bad monsters is soooooo fucking cliche

And he’s talking about the chess pieces the whole time????? Am confusion.

She’s so horny for this insane man screaming at her and cornering her

She says she’s lost everything that matters and he changes, his agony visible behind “layers and layers of defenses he’s erected”

It’s calling to her own agony

They're soooo connected and staring at each other

He pulls on one of her curls and it makes her super horny

“Five minutes ago he was being a total douche to me”

Pushing him is like pushing a wall of granite

He’s got a scar down half his face that she didn’t notice until now????

“A fallen angel with a bad boy vibe for miles”

She’s touching his scar…

“I don’t understand you”

AND SHE QUOTES HIM QUOTING HAMLET IN RESPONSE

CH 4: shining armor is so last century

“Mr. tall dark and surly” would be more snarky and cute if she didn’t just have an ~earth-shattering moment of connection~ with him over their agony or w/e

Some weird instinct i don’t understand tells me not to mention that guy - the amount of times this girl has acknowledged something she doesn’t understand is so redundant and weird.

She keeps referring to the guy she spent half the last chapter basically falling in insta-love with as “tall dark and surly” as if that didn’t happen, as if he was just a dick and then he left without all the insta-love shit

Uncle finn and flint is a student...couldn’t pick any other name?

“A smile in his eyes that’s as different from the other guy’s iciness as the stars just outside the windows are from the endless midnight blue of the sky” and i’ve fallen asleep while she was spinning this long unending heavy-handed metaphor

His eyes blaze with sympathy

He offers to give her a piggyback up the stairs…

“You’re so little i won’t even notice” not lyk other girls guyz

Four guys open the door and they’re all sexy AF, tall dark and surly is among them ofc

“I couldn’t help but wonder why the icy guy made me hot and the one lending me his warmth left me cold” WE GET IT WE FUCKING GET IT WE DIDN’T NEED YOU TO SPELL OUT THE ALLUSION

“I want a name to go with his insane body and even more insane face”

CH 5: things hot pink and harry styles have in common

Macy is a cinnamon roll i love her

His name is JAXON VEGA...JAXON. G2G

Macy was so nice to her that she finally starts crying because macy is the BEST

Grace puts on a harry styles t-shirt and macy is dancing around to watermelon sugar when she comes back. This book already feels dated and it came out last month

CH 6: no i don’t really want to build a snowman

She wakes up in the middle of the night thinking about jaxon and almost has a panic attack

I hope in the actual book there is a tw for panic attacks because when i see / read about the symptoms of one or a description of one it triggers one for me

She goes exploring the castle in the dark to avoid the attack

Some guys come in wearing like concert tees and ripped jeans and she wonders if they’re ghosts, like how hogwarts has ghosts

I could swear he was sniffing me which was totally bizarre and not ghostlike behavior at all - this was cringe except i was listening to it at like 2x speed so when you hear it fast it’s actually funny

The guys corner her

They say something like “show us what you can do” and they seem to smell something about her…? They’re werewolves maybe??

CH 7: Something really freaking wicked this way comes

Hate these titles sfm

“With my thin california blood, i won’t last in the snow”

Jaxon saved her ofc and makes the guys apologize

“The moon is doing its thing” they’re totally werewolves

She thanks him and he’s like “i just made you a pawn in a game” and she’s like dude what but he’s staring at her and it’s making her hot and bothered

He wipes blood of her bottom lip and sucks it off and she finds it SUPER sexy

“This isn’t like your old high school”

He whispers in her ear “you have no idea what i know” and i’m like..okay dis kinda hot or whatever

She wonders when she’ll see him again and why it matters so much to her - bitch because he makes you horny!!!! Just say that!!!!!!

CH 8: Live and let die

It’s at this point that i stopped for the first round, and i had to ask: why the FUCK didn’t macy or the headmaster tell grace that this was a school for - obviously - vampires and werewolves? Is macy one? Is it genetic? Grace is a mortal according to the back of the book.

Grace tells macy what happened minus jax

She mentions to macy the boys didn’t have cold weather gear on and macy’s like hmmm weird idk anything about that

And they’re going to a party tonight and grace is like i don’t wear makeup i only own makeup and lip gloss and i’m like...did i accidentally re-download AFTER because here we go with the NLOG syndrome

The party is a welcome party for grace - and it’s actually a high tea??? Tf?

“I’d die without netflix”

“Have you seen this show legacies? It’s about a bunch of supernatural creatures that go to a boarding school! Isn’t that silly??!”

And then macy says, “who can resist a hot vampire?”

Guys….are we SURE this isn’t satire?

“I can’t help remembering what those guys said about the moon doing its thing when i see the werewolf on the show…”

CH 9: Even hell has its factions

Omg her dress is showing off too much of her big boobs, maybe the jeans she originally wanted to wear will be better

Macy calls her beautiful and then we get a full “with my curly hair and freckles and this color eyes i’m so not beautiful, i’m wallpaper next to macy”

“We could be fashionably absent” lol

The beads on the door don’t shock grace but they shock everyone because she is NOT LIKE OTHER GIIIIIIIIRLS

This castle is goth chic baybeeeeee the light fixtures are downturned thorny black roses where can i cop these

“The pterodactyls in my stomach are now butterflies”

She says FML. did a 50 year old woman write this. Edit: i looked, i cannot find how old this author is

Velvet wallpaper, wall sconces shaped like dragons, LET ME IN

“Self-imposed isolation” lol little did she know what a phrase in the lexicon this would become in 2020

Cliques include muscular people near the windows, soft flowery delicate people in the back of the room which are macy’s friends, super-tall literally hot people in the middle, and the black-or-white money people that seem to be more formal

She says “basketball anyone??” re the tall people lol

I am going to guess: werewolves, witches, dragons??, and vampires

Macy keeps having coughing fits?

Hot redhead - simone, hot dark girl - lily, hot asian girl - gwen

“Simone’s just bitter all the guys are looking at you”

Grace loves dr. pepper so i fuck with her

Macy’s boyfriend is cam and his friend is james, who looks at her like she is food?

“I’m just not that interesting”

CH 10: turns out, the devil wears gucci

Would i have probably picked this title as well? Yes. did it make me cringe nonetheless? Fer shure.

“Do i need some jerk trying to make me his afternoon snack?” huh???? As far as you know these are normal boys...make it make sense

Jaxon makes his ENTRAAAANCE BABY

Dressed all in gucci black - she can tell from across the goddamn room

“Jaxon is anything but regular, anything but ordinary, even here among the blatantly extraordinary”

Icy blank stare soooooo much

She calls his voice low wicked and wild

She can’t stop thinking about “running my tongue over the perfect bow of his upper lip, dragging is lower lip between my teeth”

Idk where these thoughts are coming from!!!! Baby you 17 c’mon now

I try to think of anything else, snow!

She takes a drink and it goes down the wrong pipe lmaoooo

“At least if i find a bathroom i can die in peace” lol

But he touches her and she stops choking and she’s like “he couldn’t have stopped that, i know, but…”

He stares at her as he bites the strawberry and she takes it as a threat

CH 11: in the library, no one can hear you scream

“His moods change more quickly than my bffs instafeed” I -

Oh so NOW she’ll say “the fuck you in his eyes” but she was saying freaking and eff before...did her publisher tell her only x amount of fucks per book?

She goes into the library and her body is like RUN, but she ignores it…

There are beautiful gargoyles and ornate shelves and...stickers fucking everywhere?

The gargoyle is pointing to an secret room that says students needs permission, but she hears chanting and decides to check it out since it might be one of the native languages spoken in alaskaaaaaaaaaa

“Especially because some of them only have less than 4,000 speakers left in the world” okay gracie-pedia tf?

CH 12: it’s all fun and games until someone loses their life

She meets a girl named Leah - who was the one chanting

Okay but i do fuck with the horror movie quote pillows…

Damn leah’s boyfriend died…

“Tea from homemade leaves” again...read this out loud before you put it in a published novel...do you mean loose leaves? Do you mean homegrown leaves?

Is she gonna poison her????

“What do you guys have to lie about that’s so important?” “Everything”

CH 13: just bite me

“Lol jk”

“Finish your drink” BITCH IT’S POISON

Macy and leah are being soooo weird about what could have happened to grace on her own

Apparently leah is super popular and secretive so it’s weird she took to grace so fast - is this a NLOG sitch or a “come into my web little fly” sitch?

She pukes because of “altitude sickness” aka poisoning i bet

CH 14: knock knock knocking on death’s door

This theme of bastardization of guns and roses songs is really....something.

Grace takes a mental health day because she’s still feeling weird

Flint comes to check on her and invite her to a snowball fight…?

If your character’s name is grace, i feel like you can’t use gracefully as an adjective, the same way you wouldn’t say Rue said something ruefully.

Flint kisses her cheek and i’m already waiting for this Great Value Edward/Jacob triangle

But he makes her feel ~nothing~ compared to jaxon

CH 15: so hell actually can freeze over

Macy likes flint, uh-oh

But the different groups don’t mix

“What is this, mean girls alaska edition?” - stfu

Omg her uncle checks on her and he reminds her of her dad and :(

We get sooooooo much detail about how to dress to go out into the wilderness...here is one thing i was able to find out: tracy wolff lives in texas. So i feel like she did ALL this research and then was like y’all gonna LEARN ABOUT THIS I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME!

As a girl who has never ever seen snow, i felt this fascination

She finds a gnarled up weird tree guarding a trail

“A weird sense that i should turn around - like the feeling in the library - came over me but i knew i was just being silly”

The lack of survival instinct henny

She comes across a gazebo where leah and jaxon are sitting

CH 16: sometimes keeping your enemies close is the only thing that prevents hypothermia

That’s not a chapter title, it’s an entire sentence…

Ooh they’re having an angry, intimate convo

And leah slaps him!!

“They’re looking at me like they’re the predators and i’m the prey they can’t wait to sink their teeth into” we get it, first of all. Second of all, what is with the long-winded metaphors

“Every time i catch sight of him i feel something tug at me i can’t identify, something i have no ability to explain” it’s horniness.

Then she just leaves but he catches up to her

With his sexy af hair blowing

“Trying to run away from all the thing he makes me feel when really i just want to grab on to him and hold on tight” - so what is the truth?! You keep acting like you don’t know what the feeling is but clearly, YOU DO.

“Everyone answers to me, eventually.” - we found the line used in the adverts guys!

Oh my god, what an asshat. Asshole, i would have laughed. Asshat is stupid.

It’s annoying af

Doing my best dory impression: just keep walking

“Making friends with a dr - a guy like flint” CALLED IT, he’s a dragon

Leah’s boyfriend was jaxon’s brother

Neither leah nor jaxon was wearing a jacket. BOOM

CH 17: it’s discretion, not diamonds, that’s a girl’s best friend

Not only cringe but grammatically incorrect…she coulda just said “discretion is a girl’s best friend” and we woulda got the reference….

Grace mentions jaxon in front of macy and she’s supes weird and grace is FINALLY like wtf is the secret you’re hiding from me

“She looks at me like i’m a few snowflakes short of a snowball” SOMEONE. READ THIS OUT LOUD. WHERE IS HER EDITOR I JUST WANNA TALK.

The order?! “Just a nickname for the popular boys” bullSHIT

Macy FREAKS OUT when she realizes grace has been alone with jaxon

She says he was interesting and “macy looks at me like i said i wanted to bodysurf the alaskan tundra”

Macy “We’re talking about jaxon right? Arrogance of a rock star?”

She didn’t mention “the scar that turns him from to pretty sexy af, and scary af”

“He’s not the one who tried to kill me” “you’ve only been here a few days, give it time” get her MACY!

HE WAS LISTENING!!!!

CH 18: how many hot guys does it take to win a snowball fight?

Ooh jaxon mad that grace is going to flint’s snowball fight

“His breath is so warm and soft that i can feel it everywhere, even deep inside” okay you horny bitch!!!!! Was this cringe or did i like it or both?

“The orange and dark water scent of him” ...what? Dark water is a cologne? Or does she literally mean like the dark water of the ocean? What in confusion

Her throat is always tight and dry around him, all the time, every day

Flint pops up and he is wearing a dragon beanie…

The rest of the order shows up and “For the first time the phrase got your back makes sense” to grace...are you kidding me? You never understood a very simple common phrase til now? Sure jan

SEXUAL TRIANGLE TENSIOOOOOOOOON

But she only has eyes for Jaxon...they both reach to touch each other.

“Grace” it’s barely a whisper but i feel it all the way inside myself BITCH

“Something tells me this boy and his world famous disappearing act is going to be the death of me”

CH 19: we came, we fought, i froze

Civil twilight AGAIN.

“I didn’t think screwed up and obnoxious was your type” me-OW

The snowball fight happens

Sounds like fun, the designer faction isn’t there

“Did she just do parkour against that tree?” re: Macy so close to being funny. I did exhale through my nose. Then “did you just parkour that tree?” i DID laugh

Flint climbs the tree with grace over his shoulder ‘like spider man’ and all i can think is “you better hold on tight spider monkey”

The wind is so strong it knocks her out of the tree…

CH 20: there’s never a parachute around when you need one

Flint catches her in mid-air...this man… #teamflint2020

“You’re heavier than you look” dead

He has shame in his eyes? Why?

Because JAXON IS THERE AND HE IS MAD!

And flint is SUPER MAD!!!!!!!

Jaxon puts himself between grace and flint so grace can’t touch flint

“Can i just say i’m feeling a lot like alice in wonderland here? Things get curiouser and curiouser.” stfu

I was laughing because she was like “so much for fitting in, now i might as well be painted biohazard orange” but then she said fml. Stfu

Jaxon picks her up

CH 21: I like standing on my own two feet, but getting swept off them feels surprisingly good, too

If it takes up more than one line of a google docs page IT’S NOT A FUCKING CHAPTER TITLE!!!!!

Ooh and his arms feel really good around her, REALLY good

Now he smells like orange and snow and it’s making her crazy

Macy looks at them like she’s getting punk’d

“Grace.” “what?” “shut up.” i’m dead

“I sprained my ankle, i’m not dying of consumption” “yeah well, the night is young” this made me lol despite it being more of macy’s voice than jaxon’s

Jaxon is blaming grace for falling? “You don’t see macy falling out of her tree” is he negging her rn?

She’s called him super-sexy twice in a paragraph

Macy goes to get ice bc she’s scared of Jaxon and grace says, “Et tu, brute?” lmaooo

“I can do it myself” “maybe i wanna do it for you” and macy squeaks LMAO

His scar makes his smile a crooked little smirk...who else had a crooked smirk...the vampire this is 1000% based on, maybe?

“I find myself relaxing despite myself” guys. Reading is power. Read your work out loud so you can hear when you use the same word twice in a sentence, like this.

“My whole body lights up like the aurora borealis i’m still dying to see”

They almost kiss but don’t bc macy comes back

~~~

[allenmendezsr]

Open G Guitar For Beginners - Easy Guitar Playing

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/open-g-guitar-for-beginners-easy-guitar-playing/

Open G Guitar For Beginners - Easy Guitar Playing

 Buy Now

      HERE’S THE SECRET AND AMAZING POWER OF THE “OPEN G GUITAR TUNING” – that allows even TOTAL BEGINNERS to start playing in a few moments, without having to learn painful chords:

When you tune your guitar to what is called “open G tuning” – and I will show you how to do that step by step right at the beginning of my digital video course – then you will be able to play major chords INSTANTLY, with only ONE FINGER! It literally only takes a couple of minutes! Watch my video above and you will see for yourself just HOW EASY PLAYING THE GUITAR CAN BE!

Now, this sounds amazing, but it’s as simple as that! I have been playing the guitar for almost 50 years, and most of my life I have used regular tuned guitars (what is called “standard E tuning”), just like probably 90% of all guitar players. As just about every beginner, back in the day, I had to learn all the “chord shapes” (or “finger shapes”), that is how and where to put the fingers of the left hand on the strings in order to get nice sounding chords. These are necessary if one wants to play the guitar. But it takes soooo long to learn and practice these chords, right? And it hurts the fingers, too, at least until you develop callouses on your left fingers. If you already tried to play the guitar, maybe even took a few lessons, you most probably already know what I’m talking about. It just takes too long.

I have been playing the guitar in bands back on high school, I have started to compose own songs about 40 years ago, and I have performed songs – both covers and my own music – and recorded music for all these years now. I have over 1600 music videos on Youtube alone. You can also listen to my original music on Reverbnation.com/mikemalak/songs –> Reverbnation.

And over all these years, many friends approached me many, many times asking “Mike, can you teach me some chords?”. And I did.Well, I tried… but most of them gave up playing quickly simply because it is hard work, learning chords and practicing them over and over, many weeks, and even months. So people asked me: “Hey, isn’t there a simpler and faster way to learn how to play chords?”.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR TO YOU?

You’ve tried guitar course but it was just too difficult

You got lost in the lesson, it was too much, too fast

Learning and practicing the chords was painful

It just took too long

Open G tuning is a special way to tune the strings of the guitar. There are many other ways to tune the guitar, and famous guitar players such as Mark Knopfler (Dire Straits) or Keith Richards (Rolling Stones) have been doing this for many decades. Tuning a regular guitar (which usually is tuned in “standard E” tuning) to Open G takes a couple of minutes. I will teach you how to do that at the beginning of my video course “Open G Guitar for Beginners”.

The Open G tuning has been used for banjos and other instruments for a long time, and at one point, guitarists like Keith Richards, Joni Mitchell and Mark Knopfler started playing some of their biggest hits in open tuning. For certain songs like “Honkytonk Women” you need the open G tuning in order to play along in the same way like Keith Richards plays this song. AND I WILL TEACH YOU TO DO THAT, TOO! All this included in my OPEN G GUITAR for BEGINNER video course! (CHECK OUT THE VIDEO AT THE TOP OF THIS PAGE!)

The fantastic thing about the open G tuning is this: you can play a the major chords with just ONE FINGER! And because the strings are set up in a special sequence (the tuning), you can play certain chords even WITHOUT putting ANY fingers on the fret board! This way of tunig the guitar has many advantages and will allow you to start playing the guitar within just MOMENTS after you have tuned it to open G. And this is so super simple to do – the tuning itself takes only a couple of minutes.

THIS MEANS THAT EVEN AS A TOTAL BEGINNER YOU WILL BE ABLE TO PLAY ALONG TO THE FIRST SONGS IN JUST A FEW MINUTES!! Even if you don’t know any chords at all at this point, and have never played the guitar before, this will be possible for you with the OPEN G method I will teach you in this video course.

All you need is your guitar, and together with me you will be able to tune the guitar in just a few minutes, and then you will INSTANTLY be able to play chords on the Open G tuned guitar! I’ve created this course in an easy going style, just like you and I sit together in the den and start playing together. It’s supposed to be FUN while at the same time you start PLAYING THE GUITAR!

You’ve never played guitar before or have no musical experience

You think you’re too old

You think for fingers are not made for playing the guitar

You think you’re just not talented enough

Yes! It’s REALLY THAT EASY!! With OPEN G GUITAR for BEGINNERS you will literally start playing along with me within JUST MIUTES!

BUT EVEN IF YOU ALREADY PLAY THE GUITAR, this video course will be of great benefit to you: if you know how to play in standard E tuning, and you’d like to change up you music and evolve as a guitar player, using the Open G tuning will be a perfect way for you to do just that! I will show you how to get more out of your guitar using the very same techniques, riffs and little tricks such as Keith Richards from the Rolling Stones! If you feel you got stuck a little in your development, and it’s about time to spice up your skills, this video course will put you on the right track – pun intended 🙂

– complete training on how to quickly tune your guitar to Open G

– complete training on how to play all major chords

– complete training on how to play minor chords (don’t worry, I’ll explain the difference between minor and major chord also in this course in case you don’t know yet)

– several exercises to get you started playing along to songs right away

– complete tutorial on HOW TO PLAY HONKYTONK WOMAN in the style of Keith Richards – I will teach you how to play along to this great Stones song

– AT THE END OF THIS VIDEO COURSE WE WILL EVEN COMPOSE A FIRST NEW SONG TOGETHER! After you have practiced the techniques a little while, you will be able to put together you VERY OWN NEW SONG!

– all in all you’ll get about 6 hours of video teaching – you can access these videos at any time and you can also download them if you like. The videos can be viewed on any computer or mobile device. You can go through all the exercises as often as you like – a lifetime guarantee even – and practice and repeat until you got all the riffs, chords, and skills under your belt. This alone has a value of at least US$ 99.00 – around SIX HOURS of video training!

– additionally, you will get about a dozen PDF files with chord charts to make it even easier for your to learn the chord positions, for you to download, print out and review at any time. These charts will help you to play the chords even faster.

– you will also get about a dozen backing track in MP3 format for you to download, that way you can play along to the exercises and songs anywhere you like. Just put them on your phone, tablet or computer, crank up the music and play along! But you can also pick ANY other song and start playing along!

– you’ll get my support by help desk or email and I will do my very best to help you get the most out of this course! I’d love to hear how you play after practicing and learning with my video course, so please do contact me and let me listen to your recordings!

– you’ll get access to my private FACEBOOK GROUP

– EXCLUSIVE BONUS: practice for at least 2 weeks with my guitar course in order to get the basic riffs and chords down, and I will OFFER YOU TO CHAT WITH ME 1-on-1 in real-time to help you with your playing, or we can go through a song idea you might have. This means you’ll get a 1-on-1 custom, personal guitar lesson included in this video course package! This offer is limited to customers who BUY ON THIS PAGE RIGHT HERE and stick with it for a just 2 weeks of practice! This is an additional value of at least US$ 35 for a one-on-one guitar training!

– you will have access to ALL updates during your LIFETIME access to this course! All additional material I will add, additional videos etc. will be available to you! When participants ask for help with any techniques or riffs, I might add more videos to the course, and you will be able to watch them, too!

AND ALL THIS IS AVAILABLE TO YOU NOW – JUST CLICK THE BUTTON BELOW

GET THE COMPLETE VIDEO COURSE “Open G Guitar for Beginners” for the killer price of

ONLY US$ 35 (that’s about US$ 29 reduction on the regular price if you buy on THIS PAGE!) –

just one single payment, no monthly or additional fees –

that’s just the price of a single decent guitar lesson.

A small investment into music skills which will bring you a lifetime of joy!

QUESTIONS?? Go to the bottom of this page to ask me. Some answers to commonly asked questions:

WHO can use this video course? – ANYONE can use this video course. You just need a guitar. It’s however NOT very much suited for children – that depends a little on the individual kid – but anyone 12, 14 years or older can learn how to play the guitar with my course.

AS A BEGINNER, can I use this course? – Yes, absolutely. You can. You do not need prior skills. If you DO already know how to play, it is of course no problem at all. You will still be able to learn new and amazing skills.

HOW LONG do I need to practice each day? – You do not need to practice EVERY day. It would help you to learn faster, of course. But if you could practice just 30 minutes each day, or even 15 minutes, that would be great.

WHEN will I be able to play along to songs? – In fact, you will be able to play RIGHT AWAY, basically in under 1 hour, tops. But realistically, in order to play all by yourself to any song, provided you practice a bit each day, you sould be able to play to songs within somewhere around 1 – 2 weeks. The more you practice, of course, the faster this will happen.

ANYONE CAN PLAY THE GUITAR!

With this OPEN G GUITAR for Beginners video course you will learn how to tune your guitar and start playing – both within under 1 hour tops!

EVERYTHING INCLUDED

All you need is your guitar. Within this video course, everything else is included: about 6h video lessons, chord charts, and backing tracks. Start playing now!

PLAY ALONG WITH ME INSTANTLY!

No need to practice painstaking chords for weeks or even months. Watch the videos, follow my lead, and you will be playing with me within minutes!

[theinnerhalf]

How We Met (9/13/2019 7:28PM)

Been recently enamored with the idea of how far I’ve come along with the friends I’ve made in my life so far. I only am because of how genuine the connections are between me and the friends I have. Gone are the days where everything seems simpler and making friends was an effortless ordeal. This just serves as a look back, as the nostalgia provides a brief mental safe haven in times where I feel like I’m constantly losing my friends, my time, and my mind. My sincerest apologies for those who come across this and get my details a little wrong, or maybe even not remember the entire thing, but just know I’m glad you’re in my life haha.

(Each line is dedicated to a different person)

1. We met as children when I was four years old. The memory is a little hazy right now but both our parents were working in the same country and that’s how we met. You taught me a second language even though you were younger and eventually we both made it to America. It’s crazy to think that we really have known each other for this long to the point where you’re a brother to me. You may come off as a liiiiitle problematic at times, but you’re family and I should be holding you accountable (I’m trying). I honestly don’t know what life would be like if it didn’t play out like this but I’m grateful that it did.

2. We met as children when I was six years old. You were one of the first people introduced to me in the circle of Filipino family friends here in America. Back when we met, I never really thought we’d grow up to become the close set of friends that we are now. Also, for some odd reason, you were always the person I could trust when it came to my deepest secrets and even to this day, you still are. 

3. We met as children around when I was seven. I don’t know the exact day we met, but the earliest memory I have meeting you was at your house. I remember you were just so filled with energy and I just wondered how could anyone have this much energy? There was also a wrestling game you and your brother kept on playing and I remember that I was terrible at it until you taught me how to play. After, I understood where that energy came from and found myself doing the same shit you were doing haha. 

4. We met as children when I was about 12 years old. There was a prayer event held at your house. I remember it being so weird because it was like...who were you? Literally had no previous connection with you until that day. You had melee on the gamecube and it was a good bonding experience overall. I also remember it being initially so hard to talk to you and that you were so sooooo mean...at least that’s changed haha.

5. We met through the youth sometime our early teenage years. I remember you being one of the cool kids. You were extremely hard to approach and hard to talk to by myself but as the years passed it got easier. Always one with the times and did your best to stay trendy and I guess that was a reason it was hard to talk to you. Never felt like I was cool enough or whatever haha. Even now, you still do the silliest things and having a serious conversation comes rarely but you’ve grown to be one of the few closest friends I have. 

6. We met in our late high school years. I remember being a little intimidated by how cool you were. And to be honest, I don’t even remember what our first encounter was like but you were so easy to vibe with right off the bat. It hasn’t even been that long since I’ve known you but you’ve easily become like family to me. I wish I remember what it was like meeting you but nothing comes to mind other than a debut we both attended and maybe some freestyle sessions haha.

7. We met in San Antonio in our early teens. I don’t remember if we had an actual encounter in person but the first interaction I remember between you and I was on facebook. I remember “interrogating” you and I’m sorry haha. I wasn’t used to getting random friend requests. Our friendship has definitely blossomed in ways I never thought it would and I seriously value our current standing and wouldn’t have it any other way. I never thought you’d be my go-to if it ever meant seeing the world with someone. 

8. We met at a restaurant for a going away party. I remember being soooo so intimidated by you. I don’t even know why or what it was, but I just couldn’t keep my composure. We grew really close in just a short amount of time but drifted apart for what seemed like an eternity. I accepted that we may never have each other in our lives’ again but the universe has an interesting way of working things out. We may not be anywhere as close as we were before but that’s definitely okay. 

9. We met online as I was leaving your city. I remember coming across your profile and was torn between deciding on swiping left or not only because I thought you wouldn’t ever swipe right on a guy like me. I swiped right anyway because really, what did I have to lose? As I boarded the plane back home, we matched and I felt as if I just had a door close on me haha. We’ve never actually met but getting to constantly interact with you the way we did was something I really appreciated. We’ve grown decently close as friends through our similarities and interests and consider you someone I can confide in. I hope we actually meet one day and maybe I can change this post up just for it.

10. We met in high school. It was a little odd meeting you because you definitely came off as the weird kid in school but you showed a genuine interest into dancing and there was no way I was going to let you pass that up. You picked up dancing like it was nothing, especially carrying it into your own unique way. We grew to be close friends, which was unexpected in every way possible but I’m glad to call you an automobile counterpart and have you by my side during some of my darkest moments.

11. We met in high school. We were nowhere as close as we are now compared to back then but only because it was a little bit difficult approaching you. You too, showed interest in dancing and my goodness were you gifted at it. It came to you by taking similar styles off of people and then developed your own and eventually ventured into getting power moves down like they were nothing. Working with you has changed our friendship and I appreciate someone as genuine and interesting as you in my life. 

12. Our first encounter was on a bench on campus while I was dancing in my seat and you were waiting for your class to start. I could feel you staring but I tried to mind it as I listened to my music. We eventually officially met months later at a birthday party as I complimented your car and you asked if I had a long strand of hair that ran down the side of my head. You eventually became my “car-senpai” and is the reason I’m this much better at driving and maintaining my dearly beloved 86.

13. We met at the original dance studio when our first high school dance group started. You had earned a reputation for being able to kick ass and take down dudes three times your size. I remember looking at you and was like “this dude looks friendly af” haha. I was sure as hell I didn’t think I’d be as close to you as we are now considering we have taken a few trips out to wherever together. I only wish we spent more time together lately because it’s always a good experience around you.

[floofsta-x]

Top 15 Kpop songs of 2016 ♪ ✻

Can you hear me crying from where you are?? How the heck am I going to do this!!? I listen to and absolutely adore soooooooooooo much kpop ;-;

@ameehhhhh tagged me in this; thank you as always love!! ♥︎ (thanks for the moral support btw c’:) All of my crying aside, I’m actually looking forward to this a lot. I want you to keep in mind as you read this that I haven’t been *seriously* into kpop for very long--give me another month and this list may completely change!! Uh I don’t think I’m going to put these in any particular order as of now. However I will give a very brief (or eh not so brief) reason why I love them!! Artist repeats doesn’t matter, this is strictly songs! (❖ means it’s going to be a #Kpop-theory subject... someday hahah. Stay tuned in the next couple weeks y’all)

If I haven’t heard a song it’s not going to be on here, oh well c: You know how hard it is to stan all the underrated kpop groups at once????

1. Fighter, Monsta X Ok so starting off the list with a bang(er) !! This is an incredibly addictive anthem and every time I listen to it I just want to put my dukes up and punch all my troubles in the face. Very few songs give me such Joie de Vivre and fighting spirit! I know you hear (or eh, see) me go on about Monsta X all the time, but hear me out on this one. With every single release that they do, their sound gets better I swear. Kihyun’s ad lib in the last (alt) chorus here is #e x p e r t !! Strap your seatbelts on for their comeback, kids, if the quality keeps improving like we’ve been seeing, and I know it is, they’re going to be THE ABSOLUTE BEST. Mark my words. PS. Also tHIS MUSIC VIDEO

2. All In, Monsta X I was debating putting Be Quiet in this spot but then I remembered just how much I love All In. It’s like highkey but lowkey at the same time??? I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be energetic or not but I love it???? The other thing I’ve noticed is that it starts out like a rap but then becomes so melody driven... in contrast to Trespass which starts melodic but becomes rap driven? PS. Also tHIS MUSIC VIDEO

3. Gorilla, Pentagon I’ve been pretty vocal on this blog about this song, so anyone who knows me will also know that I adore this track. It has such a cool sound, the beat is addictive, the melody is catchy, and the raps are masterful. (”Like Boom Boom Boom” ;^;) The slow bass drop in the background?? IT’S ALSO IN THE KEY OF CONCERT E MINOR?????? For only their sophomore effort of their freshman year, I’m totally impressed. Pentagon is going to go far. I’m also really into Pretty Pretty, I believe that one’s actually on Five Senses? As for Can You Feel It, that’s a cool track too but I’m not as big of a fan of it--the tonality is extremely unstable in that one and it sets me on edge. ❖

4. Fantasy, VIXX Haha yeah this is another one that I’ve said I love 400,000,000 times. In my humble opinion, VIXX is incredibly underrated for how good their vocals are and ALSO THEIR LYRICS. The words to Fantasy are absolute poetry™, even in English translation. They’re seriously worth looking up. Let’s see what else... Ending on the leading tone in the chorus. Notes go rly high wow. Like favorite song of all time 12/10 would recommend ❖

5. Kki, Cross Gene This song never fails to get me dancing. I think it has a pretty similar sound to Gorilla and that’s a definite +. A lot of the songs on CG’s Game (mini?) album are amazing but this one’s the best in my opinion. In case you’re curious, the interval in the chorus is a perfect fifth

6. Saxophone, Double S 301 It’s so hard to choose an absolute favorite Double S 301 2016 release. I think between 21gram, Remove, and Saxophone though it’d be the last. This track has everything I love, a sampled saxophone hook, killer harmonies, and a singable melody. It’s catchy too?? 

7. 21gram, Double S 301 Need a ballad and more than your feels can handle? Turn this one on and look up some lyrics and I guarantee you’ll be crying in under a minute. This could seriously be a wedding song (or a cry-to-your-breakup song). If you’ve never listened to Double S 301 (SS301), please do, I’m begging you. Their harmonies are the absolute best! Also you can listen to music by them under their former name, SS501, most of that is pretty good too.

8. Monster, EXO So this is an extremely popular song, with good reason in my opinion. Its dark sound and themes are thought provoking and intriguing, and the melody itself starts and ends on the seventh of the key???? I’ll tell you more about that later. ❖

9. Boom Boom, Seventeen I’m in absolute love with the quasi funk sound of this track. I will admit that I’m not too much a fan of Seventeen yet but their harmonies impress me. 

10. Yes or No, UP10TION I just started listening to this one recently and I’m in.love.already. The chords are simply amazing and I could sing the melody all day. I also believe that it changes keys a few times? At least it switches between minor and major which is always amazing to hear. The one thing that I’ve been thinking about UP10TION since I started listening to them was, wow they go really high... maybe higher than other groups. I’ll have to do some testing on this though.

11. Lie, BTS (Jimin) So yes I know I don’t post about BTS as much as some people think I should. I like their music, and not just Jimin and Rapmon, trust me!! Lie is so unique, it has the quality that we’ve come to expect from BTS (well Jimin), expert vocals and amazing lyrics. The song stands out though because of its powerful presence and weight as well. Bonus points for the minor, subdued verses and then...... “.....Caught in a lie” me: wtf that is such a major sound my heart has been wounded

12. Boombayah, BLACKPINK Remind me to explain the ‘East Asian’ synth sound to you sometime... This track embodies it. I love the unrelenting bass in this one too. I know a lot of people say that BLACKPINK lacks vocals and they get shit for YG’s head calling them his ‘prettier 2NE1′, but I think they have potential. 

13. Back Again, KNK I love the piano beginning, and then, the beat kicks in and makes this one all worth it. I also like the inflection with which ‘back again’ is said. I will confess though I haven’t listened to much more by KNK, so I might search around and change my mind on this one. I plan to look into them more in the future though. 

14. It’s Raining, SNUPER At first I didn’t really like Snuper’s sound, but their ‘Rain of Mind’ Mini-album grew on me. I think that they accomplish a pretty good blend of genres and styles on it. It’s Raining, for instance, reminds me of an ‘80s-‘90s New Wave song. Among the other ones they do are Jazz (There’s even an on key but really badly done sax solo in So Much in Love.), funk, and a couple others I can’t describe right now.

15. Queen, HISTORY Why don’t more people stan these guys? ;-; Well anyway, the song. I really love the video for this and the song is mature and sexy as well. You might notice a theme in my choices, and that is saxophone hooks. oh there’s also the word ‘boom’ in some shape or form lol. They seem to be universal kpop elements right now lol.  

Runners up: Good Luck, AOA; Skydive, B.A.P; Be Quiet, Monsta X; Remove, Double S 301; Yeah Yeah, SISTAR; Very Very Very, I.O.I; Oh NaNa, K.A.R.D; Pretty Pretty, Pentagon; 

So that’s it for me! Yeah as I said, these might change as I keep listening to things over the course of the year lolol~ I tag @rhainintheattic, and tbh she’s the only one I’m really curious to hear from. Soooo if you want to do this, be my guest.

[useyourrwords]

Month in Review // The Month From Hell – March

This month has given me more breakdowns than I can count.

So maybe it’s not the single worst month I’ve ever lived but honestly, it’s pretty high up there!

Between a car accident, still going through the mess of changing names, pain, oh so much fucking pain, a new doctor who doesn’t know how to help me, and an altercation I wish to just forget, I’m just about ready to hide under my blankets and never leave my room.

Unfortunately, that’s not an option and so I am sitting at me desk at work writing this instead.

If you would like to buy any of the following books please consider using my Book Depository Affliate link!

         Month’s TBR

│The Dream Thieves││

│Skylarks││

│The Surface Breaks││

│The Female of the Species│││

│Sharp Objects││

│Blue Lily, Lily Blue││

│Truly Devious││

│Khutulun│tatterhood│Agnodice│Te Puea Herangi│Moremi Ajasoro│Sybil Ludington│Kurmanjan Datka│Andamana│Mary Seacole│Florence Nightingale│Gráinne “Grace O’Malley” Ni Mháille│Rejected Princesses││

│Empress Xi Ling Shi│Hatsheput│Agnodice│Trung Trӑc & Trung Nhi│Fatima Al-Fihri│Bygone Badass Broads││

     Read

│The Surface Breaks│Lousie O’Neill│││││★★★★│Read Mar 13│

This book was so unapologetically feminist, I loved it.

│The Dream Thieves│The Raven Cycle #2│Maggie Stiefvater│││││★★★★★│Read Mar 25│

I think I jumped into this book too quickly after finishing the first so it took me a while to get through it but I got there eventually.

│Truly Devious│Truly Devious #1│Maureen Johnson│││││DNF Mar 22│

I don’t think fiction audiobooks are for me! at least not ones I haven’t already read. I’m switching to Non-Fic/memoirs and I’ll try rereading a fave eventually to see how I go with that.

│I’ve Got This Round│Mamrie hart││││

After realising ficiton audiobooks weren’t for me I needed a win so I returned Truly Devious for this because i love Mamrie and there’s no way I wouldn’t love this. I was right.

│Skylarks│Karen Gregory│││││

I’ve just been super invested in this one. I don’t know if it’s because i wasn’t reading it regularly since I normally read ARCs while I’m exercising…and I’ve not been exercising like at all this month. I don’t know. I’ll give it another go next month if I have time but otherwise it’ll probably be pushed back to May.

│Rad Girls Can│Kate Schatz│││││

I switched to this ARC since it’s only 112 pages and I figured SURELY I can finish this before the month is up. Nope. So April it is!

│Khutulun│tatterhood│Agnodice│Te Puea Herangi│Moremi Ajasoro│Sybil Ludington│Kurmanjan Datka│Andamana│Mary Seacole│Florence Nightingale│Gráinne “Grace O’Malley” Ni Mháille│Rejected Princesses│Jason Porath│││││

│Empress Xi Ling Shi│Hatsheput│Agnodice│Trung Trӑc & Trung Nhi│Fatima Al-Fihri│Bygone Badass Broads│Mackenzi Lee│││││

I didn’t do much but at least I got my entries read for both of these!

Book of the Month

│The Female of the Species│Mindy McGinnis││││││★★★★★│Read Mar 31│

Once I realised just how little I read this month and made myself power through this one and omg it was soooo good and worth it. I needed this book this month.

│Average Rating: 4.5★’s│ 5│

Structured TBR Pass or Fail?

│Must Read:  3/5│ 0/1│ 0/0│ 2/2│ 3/3│ 10/10│ 5/5│

│Allowances:  1/1│ 1/1│ 0/0│ 0/0│ 0/1│

Clearly this was a terrible reading month. I got hardly any reading done. I started off relatively strong but then I stopped exercising (for reasons I’ll go into further later in this post) so that was less time spent reading. And then I spent far more time watching TV when I should have been reading because Depression. And the audiobook wasn’t really working out for me so I didn’t get that read either. FUN.

     Haul

│Barbed Wire Heart│Tess Sharpe│││

I loved Far From You so when I saw this was available on Netgalley I knew I needed it! And it wasn’t even a request, just one you could immediately download and my international blogger heart is v. v. thankful.

│Vicious│Villains #1│V.E. Schwab││

│Vengeful│Villains #1│V.E. Schwab│││

If you’ve been paying attention to my hauls sections you’re probably thinking “doesn’t Grey already have both of these books and the answer to that is yes absolutely but listen.

I have the paperback copy of Vicious in the old cover art because i bought it years ago…Well my mum bought it for me years ago but same same.

Then it was announced that with the long-awaited release of Vengeful we’d get all new cover art so I knew I’d be re-buying the first no matter what.

And then the collector’s edition came out for Vicious.

So I bought that and then Book Depository listed the hardback for Vengeful as a collector’s edition and so I ordered that as a birthday present to myself.

Only I don’t actually think it is a collector’s edition because it doesn’t say so on the cover or anything but oh well.

So I finally have both books with new covers only I don’t want to read them because if I do, I’ll want to annotate them and I don’t annotate collector’s edition as a rule for myself.

So I had to buy the paperbacks. I just had to. My hands were tied. Did I really have the money to? No, but I’ve had a hard month so fuck it.

Past Grey Reads

 Book Review // Girl Made of Stars – I Am Broken

 Grey Reads // Everything’s On Fire and I Couldn’t Be Happier – Girls of Paper and Fire

 Grey Reads // Bloody Moors & Candy Castles – The Wayward Children 2 & 3

       Film & TV

Honestly I barely remember what I did actually watch.

Month’s TBW

│The Bold Type│Season 2││

│Brooklyn Nine-Nine│Season 6││

│RuPaul’s Drag Race│Season 11││

│I Am The Night│Season 1││

│The Umbrella Academy│Season 1││

│Russian Doll│Season 1││

│Sex Education│Season 1││

     Watched

│The Bold Type│Season 2││2017│ Sarah Watson│ Katie Stevens, Aisha Dee, Meghann Fahy│★★★★★│

This show is so fucking good, I’m not not so patiently waiting for the third season to come out next month!

│Brooklyn Nine-Nine│Season 6││2013│ Daniel J. Goor, Michael Schur│ Andre Braugher, Andy Samberg, Stephanie Beatriz│Watching weekly episodes│★★★★★│

The episode with the murder in the apartment and the making stupid promises to the mum and Jake slowly going crazy and Rosa with a different hair style every scene??? Iconic!

│RuPaul’s Drag Race│Season 11││2009│ RuPaul│RuPaul, Michelle Visage│Watching weekly episodes│★★★★★│

Between Miss Vanjie being the narrator of the season (and maybe my fave of all time), her hoemance with Brooke Lyn Heights, Yvie’s take no shit, own your shit attitude and Plastique’s fish???? I am in love with this season.

I could do without Silky’s obnoxious everything and R. Kelly style Untucked breakdowns but whatever.

│Russian Doll│Season 1││2019│  Leslye Headland, Natasha Lyonne, Amy Poehler│ Natasha Lyonne, Charlie Barnett, Greta Lee│★★★★★│

I am in love with Russian Doll and everything about it. It’s short, it’s smart, it’s quality TV and it’s fucking funny.

│Sex Education│Season 1││2019│ Laurie Nunn│ Asa Butterfield, Gillian Anderson, Emma Mackey│★★★★★│

This show is stupid funny but it’s also super intelligent and important. This is such a good show for teens to have easy access to and I can’t wait for the new season.

│Queer Eye│Season 3││2018│ Bobby Berk, Karamo Brown, Tan France │★★★★★│

This season had me crying my eyes out and I loved every second of it.

But my favourite moment is when Jody, on the first episode, comes out for the big reveal and the guys all lose their fucking minds! Especially Karamo’s and Antoni’s reactions. They were absolutely fucking gold.

│Game of Thrones│Season 1││2011│ David Benioff, D.B. Weiss│ Emilia Clarke, Peter Dinklage, Kit Harington│★★★★│

I mean, yes I am well aware of the problems Game of Thrones have and I am trash for it anyway. Is it as amazing as I initially thought?? Not at all but I’m in too deep now I can’t just not watch the final season.

So here I am re-watching the entire show with my mum to drag it out just a little longer and hopefully by the time we’re all caught up the final season, in it’s entirety, will be well and truly out.

I just have to try and avoid spoilers until then…which should actually be very easy because of something I’ll announce in my Month Ahead post.

Me after this month.

     Music

│YUNGBLUD│11 Minutes + Halsey│Loner│Falling Skies + Charlotte Lawrence│

│Dodie│Burned Out│

│Troye Sivan + Lauv│i’m so tired…│

│Noah Cyrus│Sadness│Good Cry│

│Julia Michaels│Anxiety + Selena Gomez│Happy│

│Steve Aoki│Waste It on Me + BTS│

Past Grey Watches

 Grey Watches // I Hate It So Much I Love It – A Christmas Prince

 Grey Watches // It Has To Be A Shit Show – A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding

 Grey Watches // I Wanna Bone Jude Law and Kate Winslet – The Holiday

Use Your Words Highlights

 Grey Reads // Bloody Moors & Candy Castles – The Wayward Children 2 & 3

 Top Ten Tuesday // Audible and Overdrive Are My Lords & Saviors – My Audiobook TBR

     Blogosphere Highlights

│Laura @ The Book Corps│#UNSOLVEDATHON: A BUZZFEED UNSOLVED READATHON — ANNOUNCEMENT AND SIGN UP!│#UNSOLVEDATHON BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS!│

│Elise @ The Bookish Actress│Why I’m Not Honestly That Excited for Game of Thrones: Season Eight│Eighteen Things I’ve Learned In My First Eighteen Years│

│Krystin @ Here’s The Fucking Twist│True Crime Tuesday: The Moors Murders│

│Jamieson @ Jamishelves│IF YOU LIKE THIS BOOK YOU’LL LIKE THIS TV SHOW !│

│Vicky @ Vicky Who Reads│Stressed About College? These Book Recs Are For You!│

│Ellyn @ Allonsythornraxxbooks│5 TIPS ON ANNOTATING YOUR BOOKS!│

│Marie @ Drizzle & Hurricane Books│10 YA BOOKS DEALING WITH ANXIETY│

│Avery @ Red Rocket Panda│DOWN THE TBR HOLE | USING THE #KONMARIE METHOD FOR MY PHYSICAL SHELVES│

│Fadwa @ Word Wonders│#DIVERSEBOOKBLOGGERSDISCUSS: THE FANTASY OF HISTORICAL ROMANCE│(SOME) BOOK BLOGGING PRESSURES & HOW TO FIGHT THEM│WORD WONDERS’ TBR EXPANSION: BOOKS WITH EAST AND SOUTH EAST ASIAN MAIN CHARACTERS│MY PRODUCTIVITY TOOLS – OR HOW TO BE A MASTER ORGANIZER!│

│Aurora @ Aurora Librialis│5 Book Quotes for International Women’s Day│

│Swetlana @ The Caffeinated Bookworm Life│6 Reasons To Watch On My Block│

│Qui @ The Black Lit Queen│Diversity vs. Representation|BLQ Quick Guide│

│Madeline @ Caffeine & Writing Dreams│How to Write Scenes that Balance Plot & Character // Scene and Sequel Sequences│

Past Month In Review

 Month in Review // Christmas is Over Thank Fuck – December

 January in Review // I Cried, Laughed, Ate Pasta, Celebrated My Birthday & Completed TWO Read-A-Thons/Challenges

 Month in Review // I FINALLY CHANGED MY NAME – February

Month’s Goals

 Get my mental health plan

 Book a therapy session I have to wait until April ahhhhhhhh

 Get a massage from mum —I just always forget okay

 Try and take a mental health day

 Try and take a mental health day later in the month

 Keep my shit together —HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA

 Start journaling —I will get to this eventually…

 Quit soft drink 

 Start floor exercises—I keep adding this and never get around to it. —I couldn’t even go for my walks for most of the month so…

 Try and read 5 books —I can’t even say I tried. 

 Don’t waste all my time on The Sims 

 Go to Writers Week

Considering how shit this month was I count 7/12 goals reached a fucking accomplishment!

My Nightmare Month

So it started well enough. I went to Writers Week on two different days and thoroughly enjoyed myself! but then i got into a car accident on the way to my third day.

Which was stressful and anxiety inducing. It’s been a nightmare to work through all the aftermath. I didn’t know if the accident would be covered by insurance or if I would even hear from the person who hit me. And then when I did get the good news of being covered I basically had to micromanage the insurance company because they did everything slow and I couldn’t afford slow. So that was loads of phone calls which is something that causes me anxiety so YAY.

It’s mostly all sorted out. I still need to take my plates in and get a refund on my rego which I tried to do a couple days ago and got frustrated so that’s a task for another day.

     I did get to go to the Fringe Festival and see Daniel Sloss’s new comedy special which was absolutely brilliant! He talked about rape culture and really put the onus on men and how they need to work and go out of their way to think critically of themselves and society and what they can do to dismantle rape culture. I laughed and sobbed. My mum nearly pissed herself laughing and it was a great night out with to die for Sri-Lankan food hot buttered squid will blow your fucking mind! and I discovered that I like to drink Pimms.

     Throughout the month I’ve still been sorting out my name change because that is a long and drawn out process of changing my name everywhere and hitting road blocks constantly has be incredibly frustrating but I’m nearly finished!

I have also been doing all of this while in incredible pain because chronic illness.

My March mood

     Basically my feet have been very painful, I knew the solution, doctor refused me, mum took me to a doctor who knows our history and I got the solution so I can actually start walking regularly again which will help my mental health loads.

My mum also took me to replace all of my shoes which was both expensive and needed so I have the best shoes for walking and working and running around doing errands and going out!

I was ready to end the month on a positive. Sure the start had rattled me a lot, and I was big depressed because of pain for most of it but I did have a few great experiences and I’d resolved almost all the long running issues.

     And then while I was waiting for mum to finish work a couple of days ago, I sat and read in the foodcourt.

A man approached me and invaded my personal space and stared at me, knowing it would make me uncomfortable, so uncomfortable that it distracted me from the fact he was trying to steal my purse.

Thankfully I noticed at the last minute and grabbed it back because I would have been a fucking mess if I had gone to all the trouble replacing everything in my purse with my new name on it, only to have to do it all over again because someone stole my it all.

The man walked off but I would be lying if I said it didn’t terrify me. The way he stared at me was so unnerving and I don’t handle people being in my personal space…like at all. Even people I know and trust have to always ask permission first. I don’t let men I know in my personal space at all because I know what men are capable of. But to have a man I don’t know get in my face with the purpose to make me uncomfortable, especially after the month I’ve had, was enough for me to completely come undone.

I’m thankful for the cleaner for checking up on me, even though I burst into tears, and I’m thankful for the girl who approached me after as well to try and be supportive.

She had fire in her eyes and in that moment I had wished that that was what I looked like instead of the girl I was, not being able to hold back tears and trying to keep calm in the middle of an anxiety attack.

More than anything, I’m thankful for my mum for being so supportive and understanding and being exactly what I needed her to be and for calling out the men who made things worse, while trying to help, when I didn’t have the strength to.

I’ve argued with myself on whether to share this and maybe I might delete it all before it gets published, but I think it’s important for women to share their experiences with how men have preyed upon them, whether sexually or not, and how men continue to use their power to get what they want from us, regardless of the negative impact it has on us.

I just—girls, women, know that if something like this happens to you, if something worse happens to you, it’s not your fault, it’s never your fault. The way you react to it is right because it’s your experience and your emotions. I’m trying to remind myself of that. 

And men, know that if you’re not actively trying to stop this shit from happening, aren’t pulling your friends up for those gross comments they make, then you’re part of the fucking problem. I don’t want to hear that you personally would never do this. That shit isn’t enough. It’s never been enough. This all lies at your feet and fuck you for helping to hold up a society that makes us think any of it is our own fault.

And if something like this happens to a girl or woman you know then ask her what she needs, ask her the best way for you to help. Because nine times out of ten the way you react naturally is going to be the complete fucking opposite of what she needs and you might make things worse. And that’s on you, not her.

Past Month Ahead

 Month Ahead // Happy Birthday To Me + Hiatus Announcement – January

 February Ahead // I’m Finally Going To Read The Raven Cycle Series & It’s Black History Month + A Great Resource for Education!!!!!

 Month Ahead // Writers Week, Comedy & Too Much To Do – March

Thank fuck March is over.

What did you do this month? What did you read? What did you watch? What posts did you write that you’re super proud of?

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