#myself now so i don’t burst into tears on the spot. this is literally one of the most horrible situations i have ever experienced i think

[pepprs]

<- girls who are 94-96% likely about to get some devastating news at some point in the next 8 hours. probably in the next 4 if i had to guess. lol

[enkas-illusion]

The Worst Kept Secret

Fandom / Pairing: Jujutsu Kaisen / Toji Fushiguro x f!reader

Rating: NSFW/Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Genre/Theme: Co-workers to lovers; non-sorcery au

Content warning: fluff but not too much, smut, oral (f & m receiving), piv sex, dom!Toji, sub!reader, overstimulation, unprotected sex, explicit sexual content, language, Toji has a filthy mouth.

Summary: Your colleague Toji only has eyes for you, despite having a reputation of sorts. Porn with a plot… or more like a build up.

Author's Note: Co-worker Toji is instantly attractive cause a) he’s not a bum and b) he’s Toji-fucking-Fushiguro – that’s all in my defence, your honour! This shit is nasty… no, I won’t explain myself (I'm pretty sure i was possessed while writing this). 

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one shot, please write to me and let me know your thoughts. I love reading whenever people have elaborate things to say T.T Thank you for reading! 

-Eren’s Birdie

Song Dedication: Talk by Hozier

“Rat!” you exclaim as you hold your phone up to display the word written boldly on the screen.

“Ummm…. It’s not a rat, it's not a patootie, it’s a ratatouille!” your coworker, Lisa, blurts out excitedly.

You both look at each other, trying your best to control before you burst out laughing. This goes on for about a minute till your bellies hurt and you’re wheezing. You quiet down as you wipe the tears forming in the corner of your eyes. 

“Why don’t I know that one?” your other coworker, Ema, mutters with furrowed eyebrows, confused at what could possibly be so funny about the sentence.

You’re too drunk to realise that sober you would not find it as funny as you do right now. But that’s what happens when you party a little too hard with your coworkers on a work trip and then hang around the hotel bar because nobody wants to go to bed even at 3am.

You look around at the handful of your coworkers, randomly occupying different spots at the bar, all too dazed and into their own conversations to pay attention to the stupid game that the three of you were currently playing – A word game your genius minds had developed, using a random word generator app and use it in a meme-able sentence.

“Oh god… next word. Feminism!” Lisa squeals, snatching your phone from you to generate the word for your turn.

“Fuck… I suddenly can’t think of anything,” you admit and giggle, trying hard to work your brain.

“Seriously…” 

“Wait, Wait… I need a few seconds,” you laugh, trying to save yourself. You look around and your eyes land on your office crush, Toji Fushiguro, sitting at the bar with your boss, Kento Nanami. 

You look back to your group with a determined look in your eyes, ready with your sentence. “I want him to do things to me that feminism wouldn’t agree with,” you giggle like a teenager, “hah! I’m a genius.”

However, your friends have fixated on something else entirely, ignoring your perfect answer, since their eyes follow your line of vision to the bar. “So, what’s the scene?” Ema looks back at you.

“It's your turn, next word–”

“Nah, we’re bored… this is far more interesting,” her eyebrows wiggle, as she scoots closer to you on the sofa. By the looks of it, Lisa has also forgotten about the game in a second. You realise you’ve dug this hole for yourself, yet you don’t mind sharing a drunk confession with your friends.

“Let’s head out for a smoke,” you get up from the sofa. Lisa is quick to grab her purse as both your friends spring up, hurrying to happily follow you out onto the secluded porch outside, ready for gossip.

As you light up your cigarette, Ema looks at you expectantly. Looking at her face makes you snort and you cough out the smoke before speaking, “Have some patience! Besides, there's nothing too juicy about this gossip.”

“Pleaseeee, literally everyone saw the way Toji was glaring at the man who asked you for a dance tonight… not gonna lie, he looked kinda hot when he got mad,” Lisa catches your lie as she fawns over Toji, something that has become a regular thing among the female coworkers at the company. 

“I know right? And I said no to the guy! What was he so pissed about anyway?” you protest.

“It's all because you agreed when the dude was like ‘at least let me buy you a drink sweetie’!” Ema imitates the stranger from the bar from hours ago.

“Hey! Who says no to free drinks?” you defend yourself.

“Okay, fair,” Lisa nods her head before realising, “aye, focus on the matter at hand! Why did you say no to the guy? He was cute.”

“Was he really though?” you retort.

“Yeah, like you’d notice anyone else when Toji's around… Please fuck him, I need some office drama!” Lisa snaps back before taking a long drag from her cigarette. 

“Yea right… I’m serious though,” you ponder between slow drags, “I doubt anything is going to happen between Toji and I.”

“Why not?!” Ema whines and you laugh at how it seems like they’re more desperate about this whole thing than you are.

“Need I remind you I literally just got out of a relationship? This is no time to be having stupid crushes. I need some alone time… besides you know how his reputation is. Sure, he flirts with me and I enjoy it a lot but I don't know,” you explain as if it’s an automated response stored in you.

“So what? Then just fuck him and get it over with. They say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone!” Lisa giggles, “Besidesss, I've heard he’s really good in bed… heard it from a mutual– uhhh, I don't really remember her name.”

“Oh wait, shit I remember that!” Ema squeals, almost dropping the cigarette from her hand in excitement, “But didn’t she also say that he basically ghosted her after? He just fucks around, I guess.”

“Hence the reputation… Men like Toji are the most charming kind. They know exactly what to say to get you to sleep with them but disappear when it comes to commitment,” Lisa ponders, staring into the distance.

“Exactly, everyone says that Toji doesn’t do relationships. And as horny and curious as I might be, I don’t just want us to fuck and leave it at that. It’d be way too awkward to have such a dynamic at the workplace,” you reason and they simply nod. There’s a beat of silence as all three of you smoke quietly.

“Still though… would it be so bad to just give it a shot? Simply see it as a one night stand and get it over with? If he’s that indifferent about it, I doubt it’d be awkward at work,” Lisa presses.

“I know right! I dont get why you’re thinking so much about it. At least the sex would be killer even if nothing else is assured,” Ema advises.

You take another big drag before dropping the bud to the ground and crushing it with your heel, “Hmmm… that’s true, I’ll think about it.”

“Think soon and try to seduce him in the three days we have here!” Lisa squeezes your shoulder encouragingly. 

“Yes! If you don’t want to, please allow me to! He looked so delicious yesterday,” Ema sighs and by the look on her face, you can tell she’s probably recalling memories of a shirtless Toji playing volleyball at the beach from yesterday. 

“Be my guest… but do it tomorrow, you’ve had a lot to drink tonight,” you snort.

“Please, drunk or sober, if there is one hook up I wouldn’t regret, it’d be him… after our boss of course,” Ema confesses.

“Yeah right. Either of us could still have a shot with Kento. Toji only flirts back with you,” Lisa looks at you with narrowed eyes.

You laugh before a sudden chill runs down your spine, and you cuss at the feeling, “Motherfucker– Should’ve gotten a coat. It's getting cold.”

Your coworkers eye each other mischievously before Lisa snickers, “Why don’t you ask loverboy to help you with it instead? That way you’d be warm inside out.”

“Oh yeah, great idea! Let me go back inside to find him–” you cut off when you see a figure walking outside towards your group.

You signal Ema, who has her back turned to the encroaching new presence, to shut up but it's too late as she fake moans, “Exactly… I’m sure he’d love to indulge you, he’d basically been eye-banging you all night, harder Toji, fuck yea–” 

“HEY TOJI! What’s up!” you’re basically shouting at the guy when he’s a few feet away, hoping to cover up and save yourself.

Maybe he senses your embarrassment, or maybe he didn’t hear her (hopefully) but he doesn’t say anything about it. Instead he greets the group and there’s an awfully awkward feeling in the air.

“Ladies,” he speaks coolly as he stands next to you, “Glad I found you here since boss man was looking for you two.” 

“Kento?!” Ema’s ears shoot up at his sentence as she exchanges a grin with Lisa. They rush ahead inside and as you are about to follow them, you feel a hand on your wrist holding you back. You turn to look at him with a confused frown.

“Where do you think you’re going? I was just getting rid of the two of them,” he smirks, making you look at his pillowy lips. 

When he catches you staring, you look down quickly, tugging a strand of your hair behind your ear nervously, “Oh… So, Kento wasn’t really looking for them?”

“Nope.”

“Oh… that’s– they’re gonna be disappointed,” you chuckle lightly as you fidget with your phone’s cover.

“Well, sucks for them, I guess,” he holds two fingers under your chin to make you look up at him, “You look pretty… you usually do, but even more so in that tiny dress.”

Your eyes grow wide at his confession as you feel the heat rush to your cheeks and you mutter a quiet ‘thank you’. You move to the front of the porch as you stare out at the vast night sky, partly to avoid feeling so mushy and partly because you feel the alcohol toying with your nerves. 

Another chill rushes down your spine and you’re pretty sure it makes you shiver visibly. As you mutter a quiet ‘fuck’, you feel him wrap his denim jacket around your shoulders. Your eyes widen at him in surprise.

“What? I’m a gentleman,” he teases, standing closer next to you. You laugh at this, turning to face him as you shake your head.

“Sure… a gentleman with a reputation,” you roll your eyes as you wrap your arms around your torso in an attempt to keep yourself warm. What you don’t realise is that this action further pushes your boobs together, causing Toji’s eyes to wander down briefly before he looks back into your eyes again.

“Aren’t you ever curious to know if I live up to that reputation?” he raises an eyebrow as he leans down closer to your face.

“Hmm, sure… if you were a stranger at a club and not someone who I had to see at work 9 hours a day, 5 days a week,” you roll your eyes at him as you bring up one hand to slowly run a finger down his shoulder to the outline of his bicep.

“Well, we see each other everyday anyway, so why not turn it into something we actively look forward to,” his fingers graze your jawline softly while his eyes shamelessly fixate on the dip of your cleavage, giving him a better view from the way he’s towering over you.

“As tempting as that is… I don’t do one night stands Toji–”

“Who said anything about just one night?” he interrupts and you tilt your head to the side in confusion, “I’m not stupid to approach someone I work with if I was simply looking for a quick fuck.”

“Oh… then please tell me what exactly you’re looking for?” you speak softly but it comes out more arrogantly than you’d like.

“You. I intend to fuck you more than once.” he’s direct yet his calm demeanour never wavers. 

You let out a nervous chuckle, “Look Toji… you’re hot, charming and oddly easy to get along with but I just got out of a relationship, it’s barely been two months–”

“I know… his loss for letting such a sweet thing go. Didn’t he initiate the break up? What a loser,” Toji laughs as his hand cups your face. 

You simply stare at him in bewilderment, you had no idea the news of your breakup had travelled even to the non-gossipers.

“Why me?” you ask, your curiosity getting the best of you.

“For starters, you’re hot. Two, I like it when we hang out outside of work, you put me at ease with your conversations. Three, I haven’t been able to hook up with anyone else for about a month since I found out about your ex… such a pretty girl should be cherished the way she deserves to be,” his fingers slide down to your collarbone, threatening to dip down even lower.

“Hmm… that’s a good enough pitch, so you want us to be fuck buddies? Exclusively?” you play with the collar of his shirt, entertaining the idea.

“Yeah, I’m not one to share,” his other hand comes up to brush his thumb against your bottom lip.

“Nothing serious?” you pout at him with fake disappointment.

“Not until the both of us feel like it,” he dips his thumb inside your mouth while his other hand snaked around your waist. You suck on his thumb as you stare into his eyes and he feels his blood rush straight to his cock.

“I can work with that,” you give him an innocent smile, “But let’s not be too obvious about it, I’d hate for our little arrangement to mess with our work life.”

“Perfect,” he smiles as he cups your jaw, staring at your lips while sliding his tongue over his lips to wet them instinctively.

Just as he’s about to lean down to kiss you, you pull back when you hear distant footsteps approaching. You see your two friends walking back towards you, talking among themselves.

“Hey, we couldn’t find Kento at the bar,” Ema mumbles.

“Really? He must’ve gone back to his room. Maybe ask him about it tomorrow,” Toji speaks innocently and you press your lips together to keep yourself from laughing.

You see Ema eyeing the jacket you’re wearing suspiciously and you suddenly take it off to hand it to Toji.

“Keep it. You’ll get cold again… return it tomorrow morning.” Toji speaks before you have a chance to give it back to him. You nod as you hold it closer to your chest.

“Alright then. Good night ladies,” he smiles politely before walking back inside. When your eyes shift from his diminishing silhouette to your two friends, they’re both staring at you with hopeful eyes.

“Nothing happened!” you exclaim and their faces drop.

“Fine, that’s it! I’m calling dibs, I’m gonna flirt with him,” Ema retorts. You simply chuckle and shrug, diverting your attention to your phone when it vibrates in your hand. You look at the notification and it’s a text from Toji.

Toji (Work):

Room no. 9010

Don’t leave me hanging, pretty

You lock your phone quickly as you look up again to force yourself to focus on the conversation.

“Could you not get the bottle from the cute bartender? We could’ve taken it to the room,” Ema sighs.

“No but I gave him my room number soooo…” Lisa giggles.

“Guys, I’m feeling a bit too drunk and tired to continue so I’m just gonna go to my room and sleep, okay?” you make up an excuse, hoping it seems believable. However, the girls are too drunk to analyse your lies and they simply pout and bid you ‘goodnight’ in a singsong voice, giving you a group hug.

You quickly make your way to the elevator and press the button to the ninth floor. And although you’re wearing his jacket again, you still feel your body shiver. You take a deep breath when you hear a ding, signalling your arrival. You walk out into the long passage quietly, skimming over the numbers till you spot his room, your heart feeling like it's about to fall out of your chest due to the thrill.

You knock on the door twice and fix your hair nervously. When no one answers, you unlock your phone to call him. You almost let out a scream when you hear the door unlock and he pulls you inside, catching you by surprise and making you stumble.

Before you have a chance to speak, Toji slams the door shut behind you, pushing your body against it before kissing you hungrily. You place your hands on his chest, creasing the fabric as you pull at it, humming into the kiss when his tongue shoves into your mouth. You close your eyes, the fluttering in your stomach making its way down to your core as his tongue plays with yours, making wet smooching sounds in the otherwise quiet room.

“I think you’ve misunderstood this. I’m simply here to return your jacket,�� you tease, huffing as you catch your breath when your lips part. He smirks as he slides the jacket off your body till it pools near your feet before caging you against his body with his arms locking around your waist.

“Of course, this is me simply thanking you for returning it,” he moves one hand lower till it’s massaging the flesh of your thigh just below where the fabric of your dress ends.

“Oh, you’re welcome,” you give him another innocent smile as you wrap your arms around his neck and pull his head down for another kiss. 

His hands lift up your dress to your stomach before going back down to squeeze your ass. He deepens the kiss as he towers over you, making you arch your back, causing you to hook your arms around him to keep your balance.

When you break the kiss for another shallow breath, he moves to your jaw, biting and pulling your skin with his teeth as he makes his way down to your neck. You tilt your head to give him more access, letting out soft sighs as he leaves sloppy kisses all over the expanse of your neck.

While his left hand hooks around your waist to keep you steady, he brings his right hand over to your mound, pressing the sticky lace of your thong into your folds. When he feels how wet you are, he groans against your skin, biting it again.

He rubs over the fabric again and you moan out of frustration, he's so close yet there's a tiny barrier between. You try to grind against his hand, whining when he pulls away.

He gets down on his knees before you can complain and lifts your right leg over his shoulder, securing it in place. You lean your whole weight against the door, feeling like you'd fall if you didn’t have something solid to hold onto, so your hands make their way down to tug at his hair.

Toji hooks two fingers into the lace, pulling the fabric to the side to expose your puffy folds to him. He slowly slides two fingers over to separate them, your wetness coating the tips of his fingers immediately. 

“Knew you had a pretty cunt,” he murmurs as his eyes remain fixed on the way his fingers are working you. You let out a breathy moan, tightening your grip on his hair.

He brings his face closer to your core, peppering the entire area with soft kisses. You thrust forward into his face but it only makes him slap the inside of your right thigh harshly.

“Toji… please, stop teasin– ngh,” you plead but your words get caught in your throat when he licks a stripe up your cunt like it's a melting ice cream. He darts his tongue out to wiggle it over your clit and your legs feel as if they're about to snap and go limp.

“Toji– wait… I n-need to take off my heels,” you huff.

“No. They stay on,” is all he says before sliding two fingers into your hole with ease, and at the same time getting back to making out with your clit.

“Fuck– Toji please– ah,” your straight knee buckles forward as you yank at his hair some more to steady yourself. You let out an involuntary yelp when he lifts your other leg over his shoulder as well, burying his face into your pussy, hooking both his arms around your thighs. While this angle hits better, you feel a different kind of thrill about completely having given up control and trusting him not to drop you to the floor.

As you lean your head against the door, your hips rut further into his face and Toji doesn’t relent even for a second. As you hook your feet behind his neck, he brings his right hand down to your hole again, pushing three fingers in this time, meeting with a bit of resistance. The squelching sound of his fingers fucking your hole mixes with the sound of his lips sucking your clit.

“Feel s-so good,” you pant as your thighs twitch around his face. You shaky hands run through his hair weakly as you try to steady your ragged breathing. Each time Toji hits the right spot inside your walls, you moan out praises and encouragement for him to keep going.

He curls his fingers as he picks up the pace and it's brutal. You hold his hair so tight that you hear him hiss momentary before getting back to fucking you with his tongue.

You close your eyes shut as your hip involuntary thrusts forward, twitching uncontrollably as you come all over his fingers. You bite your tongue to control your moans, turning them into muffled whimpers instead. He pulls his hand out to hook it back around your thigh as his tongue starts lapping at your juices to lick you clean.

“Ngh– Toji, too much!” You squeal as you try to move your hips away from his touch but it causes him to poke his tongue out further over your sensitive skin.

“God– please, baby I can’t take it anymore,” you cry as your body jerks violently again. You hear him chuckle before kissing your clit one last time and pulling your legs off his shoulders and standing up again.

When you land on your feet, you're glad he’s holding your waist to keep you from crashing to the ground. He kisses you on your lips and you taste yourself on his tongue. It's enough to take your already intoxicated mind to a new level of high.

He slowly lets you go before stepping back to create distance as he hurriedly takes off his clothes and your eyes widen when you see the way his erect dick hangs low and heavy.

He grabs a condom from his wallet, tearing off the cover before sliding the rubber over his hung cock smoothly. The smug smile on his face grows wider when your eyes peel away from his dick to meet his gaze. You stare at him with a look of astonishment mixed with nervousness. 

“Toji… you're–” you whisper silently. Toji is blessed to say the least.

“It's okay, don't be scared, pretty. I'll make it fit perfectly,” he cooes as he closes the distance between your bodies.

You gulp when he pressed his hands on either side of you, caging you against the door. As he's kissing your shoulder, his hands move to your back to undo your zip. He struggles a bit, fiddling with the zip of your dress and you’re pretty sure you hear a rip when he grows impatient, tugging at the fabric harshly.

“Did you jus–”

“Shh… later,” he blurts out, not giving you a chance to complain as he pulls the dress down your body, unhooking your bra to yank it down. He quickly takes off your thong as well, leaving you exposed as you stand in front of him in only your heels.

“So much better than what I had imagined,” he stares at your naked figure hungrily and you pull him closer to kiss him once again, already missing the way his lips feel.

You wrap your hands around his torso to feel his muscular back with your fingers, growing wetter at how huge his body feels compared to yours. He pulls away to lean down, latching his mouth onto one of your nipples. 

You let out a satisfied hum and he repeats the action on your other nipple. Your eyebrows furrow as your back arches at the sensation and you weakly claw at his pecs.

“Fuck– I can't wait any longer… Just let me know if it hurts too much,” he groans as he scoots you up off the floor completely, hooking your knees over his elbows, opening you up wider as he readjusts his pelvis under you.

You bring a hand down to guide his tip to your entrance, sucking in a deep breath as you look down, anticipating his movement as he begins pushing his dick inside you. 

With your legs spread apart firmly, he presses his hips up, almost losing his shit at how tight you feel. You bring both of your hands up to hug them around his neck. You steady yourself, resting your cheek onto his shoulder briefly when you feel his movement come to a halt. You feel so full, there's a delicious ache in your lower belly.

“Shit– I'm gonna move now, okay?” he grunts. You simply nod your head as he grabs you by your sides to push your lower body away till only his tip is inside before pulling you in closer to fill you up again.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head while your mouth hangs open when Toji begins to slam you onto his hard length, repeating the motion over and over again as you let out broken cries of his name. When he picks up speed, your pussy flutters at the abnormal feeling, causing him to pounce into you harder.

“Oh god– nghh– Toji!” You cry into the crook of his neck.

“Mmh– look at me, let me see that pretty face,” he orders breathily. You pull away from his neck reluctantly, eyebrows still knitted as your lips stay fixed in a silent O shape.

“Look at how well you take my cock… ‘ts a perfect fit,” he hisses when your pussy squeezes him again at his words. You'd always thought that Toji would be the silent type, just like he was at the office, but seeing him spew such vile praises just adds more to the intensity of it all.

“Fuck– Toj–” you whimper as you rest your forehead against his.

‘Hmm? Yes, pretty? Cock got your tongue?” He laughs but it's strained. You tilt your head to kiss him on the lips and he shoves his tongue into your mouth to kiss you back hungrily. You moan into the kiss when he thrusts harder. In a swift motion he pulls away from the kiss, dropping your legs to the ground as he pulls out of you to turn you around.

He pulls your hips back to meet his, while pushing your face flush against the door to arch your back for him. He slides back into your hole in an instant, rutting into you from behind. Your hands press against the surface of the door while he grips onto your hips tighter to keep them from jerking forward due to the force.

You bring your left hand down to rub your clit, the pressure building up further as you get closer to your release. Toji leans forward to press his chest against your back, hooking his hand down to swat yours away. Instead, he replaces it with his fingers to toy with your clit and it feels so much better than your own dainty ones.

When your legs start to shiver as the pressure in your stomach builds up, Toji brings his other hand to intertwine his fingers with yours, pushing your chest further into the door.

With the way you're screaming his name, you're pretty sure anyone passing by outside can hear you. You wonder if that's the reason he's doing it, to show people just how good he's fucking you.

“Toji fuck– I'm coming– fuck!” You cry as your legs shake as you cum hard, threatening to give out, not being able to hold your weight. Despite wanting to finish himself, obsessed over how your pussy is sucking him in, he knows it'll be a bit too much for you to handle at the moment. So, he slows down as he secures one hand around your waist before pulling out completely. 

He turns you around till you're facing him, taking deep breaths to calm your breathing. He bends down to swing your body over his shoulder with ease as if you weigh nothing at all. He walks over to the bed before slamming you back down onto the soft mattress. 

He gives you another cocky smile, proud of how deliciously fucked you look. You recognize this look and just as he's about to lean forward to make his way to you on the mattress, you place one foot onto his chest as the heel digs into his skin.

“Time out… you’re too much,” you sigh and he lets out a snort.

“Better get used to it,” he smiles as he brings his hands up to take off your stiletto, tossing it on the floor before bringing your other leg up to take off the other pair. 

He holds both your feet firmly, pushing them into your torso till you're practically folded in half as he brings one hand down to rub your swollen clit.

“No,” you turn to the side to get out of the position before sitting up straight, looking at his still erect cock in front of you. You lean closer to him as your hand wraps around the length, “Let me make you feel good.”

You roll the condom down before discarding it to the side, leaning forward to kiss his tip, swirling your tongue around the angry swollen head before licking a strip up his shaft. When you open your mouth wide, he grabs his length to tap it on your tongue a few times before you wrap your lips around the thick head. You make eye contact with him as you take in more of him, letting your mouth adjust to his size slowly. He mutters a quiet ‘fuck’ while grabbing the back of your head to push it closer. You gag before you can even take his entire length in your mouth, tears slipping out the corners of your eyes.

“Yes, right there… such a pretty mouth. Come on, I know you can take some– ugh— more,” he grunts and you relax your mouth to deep-throat him.

As Toji lets out breathy cusses, you move a hand down to massage his balls. Your other hand moves between your legs to part your folds and rub soft circles. This doesn’t go unnoticed by the man and you see a mischievous smile creep up on his face.

“Let go, babe,” he smiles while firmly pulling at your hair. You move your head back and you can already feel your throat aching as it readjusts to the emptiness. You’re still stimulating his tip with kitten licks, lapping at the precum, all the while touching yourself desperately.

Toji grabs both of your wrists as he pushes you back up on the bed, climbing up before lying on his back. As you await his instructions, you’re confused when he signals you to sit on his face. You hesitantly straddle his chest but it all makes sense when he tells you to turn around. You giggle as the heat rushes to your cheeks as you lie face-down on top of him to sixty-nine him.

“Now, stop being so greedy and focus on sucking my dick,” he speaks as he pulls at your asscheeks to part them, parting your folds with his tongue. Your toes curl in as you lean down to take him in your mouth once again.

As you bob your head up and down, sucking his entire length, his groans vibrate against your pussy as he eats you out just as fervently.

You steady your hands on his thighs as the muscles flex and relax every time his tip kisses the back of your throat. You close your eyes to focus on your movement as it gets harder and harder with Toji slurping at your pussy ruthlessly.

When you bring your hands over to play with his balls, it has him unravelling quickly. After edging himself unintentionally the whole night, he can’t help but feel like this is the tipping point.

“Do you– mmh– mind swallowing?” His voice is strained. You shake your head no, not parting from his cock even for a second. His nails dig into the flesh of your ass as thoughts of you flood his mind.

He can’t help but feel his pride swell that he's the one who gets to ravage his seemingly innocent co-worker like this. As if it weren’t already hard enough, imagining the things he’d do to you when he saw you at the office – now he had actual memories in flesh to make it harder.

Two months ago, he wouldn’t have imagined you'd be going dumb over his dick this way. Your interactions had always been respectful, despite him flirting with you occasionally. It was only about a month ago that you took him by surprise when you give a witty reply,  flirting back with him.

Toji knew a thing or two about breakups, so when he subtly inquired and eavesdropped in conversations around the office, he heard your loudmouth friend talk about how sad it was that your ex had the audacity to dump you when you clearly were out of his league.

Sad indeed, Toji thought, wanting nothing more than to finally get to fuck his pretty colleague. But when you both were assigned on a project together about three weeks ago, the flirting had gotten out of hand and your talks were no longer just a few words exchanged out of courtesy. Toji knew he wasn't made for relationships but a part of him wanted to make you his and greedily keep you to him.

As he enjoys the way you’re sucking his dick with your pretty pussy fluttering under his touch, his desire to have you has only grown stronger.

He leans his head back when he feels himself shoot his load into your mouth, his dick twitching as he feels you lick and struggle to swallow him.

“Fucking hell–” he sighs, kneading the flesh of your ass lazily. When he feels the weight of your body lift up, he grabs your waist to pull your ass back to hover it over his face.

“Where do you think you're going?” He huffs and before you can answer, he's eating you out at a faster pace than before. You already feel overstimulated as is but when Toji pushes two fingers inside, it turns you into a blabbering mess.

You arch your back as you lean forward with your fingers denting the skin over his abdomen. You grind your hips to feel his tongue on your cunt. Your head hangs limply when you cum once again on his tongue and Toji continues to slurp at your juices.

You body twitches violently and you beg him to slow down. He chuckles as he licks you clean before placing a quick kiss over your folds, relaxing his grip to let you get off.

You roll over to the side till you're lying on your back, your chest heaving as you take deep breaths. You look down when you feel a hand on your shin. He smiles lazily at you as he caresses your skin. You smile back before closing your eyes to relax, but open them back again when you feel the mattress dip as the figure beside you shifts.

You find Toji caging you with his arms on either side of your head as he leans down to kiss your lips. You close your eyes, humming into the kiss. He dips his head down to give you another mark on your neck, bringing one hand down to play with your nipples.

“Let me rest!” you push his chest but it doesn't faze him at all.

“Okay fine,” he laughs, “I'm only going easy on you cause it's our first time.”

“Easy? You really live up to your reputation,” you stare at him in disbelief. This makes him laugh and it’s the first time you hear his real laughter and not the smug, cocky chuckles of usual. You grin when you feel a warm fuzzy feeling in your heart, maybe Toji Fushiguro has more to him than he lets on.

He creates some space between you when he gets off and before you can ask him what he's doing, he lifts you up in his arms to carry you to the bathroom. 

When he sits you down on the sink counter to run the hot water tap to fill up the tub, you giggle.

“What?” He walks back to you.

“Nothing… just… Now, I get why women apparently call you unforgettable,” you mumble, trying hard not to blush.

“I don't do this for them,” he shrugs. You roll your eyes at him, not believing his words.

He chuckles, “I'm serious! I don’t fuck around… much. It's not a communal dick.”

“Oh really? What have I done to deserve such special treatment?” You tease.

“If I want to keep seeing you, I have to make you want to see me again too,” he smiles, leaning closer till he’s standing between your parted legs, brushing a finger over your lips.

“I think you guaranteed that right after you made me come the first time,” you laugh.

“That easy? Why's that?”

You shake your head no and he raises an eyebrow, urging you to speak.

“Well… if you must know, I rarely came with my ex. He said he got tired quickly so often I'd finish myself off in the shower later,” you confess, feeling a bit embarrassed at admitting this to him.

“Damn. What a fucking loser,” Toji chuckles dryly as he lazily rubs soft circles on your inner thighs, “Well, I'm glad he sucked. It really was time for an upgrade.”

You laugh as you play with the hair on his nape. You wonder out loud, “Have you ever thought about anyone else from the office?”

“Like who? You’re the only one there who I’d get blue balls for,” he laughs.

“Seriously? Not even Ema or Lisa? They’re pretty hot,” you push.

“Not my type.”

“Hmm”

“Why do you ask?”

“Nothing… just…”

“They’re painfully obvious about their crush if that’s what you’re asking,” he lets out another dry chuckle as he brushes your loose strands to the side, “Well they won't bother from tomorrow.”

“Why's that?” your eyebrows furrow.

“Unless you have a top that covers your entire neck, they’re going to figure shit out instantly,” he smirks as he traces the light red/purple bruises on your neck. You twist to the side to look at your reflection in the mirror.

Your eyes widen as you gasp, “Toji! How am I going to cover these?”

“Maybe don't... it doesn’t matter if they find out– maybe that way the gossip will reach your loser ex and he’ll know just how well I take care of you,” he teases, nuzzling his nose into your neck.

“God, you’re obsessed,” you giggle as you slap his chest lightly.

“Hmm, maybe. Told you I'm not one to share… especially not when your pussy tastes so good,” he kisses down your body till his face is in front of your core again. 

“I never said yes to our little arrangement… I can always back out,” you tease but your breath hitches when he presses his tongue to your core once again.

“Hmm, maybe I need to try my best to convince you then,” he nibbles and you instinctively tangle your fingers into his hair, closing your eyes as you enjoy the way Toji fucks you with his tongue once again.

“Toji… the bathtub,” you sigh when you hear the water overflow. Toji pulls away, holding his hand out and pulling you to the bathtub. Once in, he closes the tap and turns you around till your back is flush against his chest. He kisses your shoulder from behind when you're nestled against his broad torso.

As you straddle his lap, you feel his boner poke your skin.

“Leave some for tomorrow,” you let out an exhausted chuckle.

“Ignore it…,” he speaks softly and you lean back, dropping your weight onto his chest. You close your eyes as you feel him rub and massage your skin with a soothing pressure all over.

You don’t realise you begin drifting into light sleep but blink a few times when your head jerks up, feeling his body shift underneath you. You lean forward to allow him some space and he gets out of the tub. You eye the way the water drips down his body, trickling over his toned back muscles before he grabs the towel to pat himself dry. His damp hair falls over his temple and you smile to yourself – you could definitely get used to this.

He holds his hand out to you and you take it as you get out of the tub. You undo the towel around his waist to dry your own body, feeling your skin prick due to the cold air after having spent a good few minutes in the hot tub.

Just as you’re about to wrap the towel around your torso, Toji tugs it out of your hand to drop it to the floor and instead lifts you up again to carry you out into the bedroom.

“Toji, I’m cold,” you hug your arms around his neck.

“I know… don’t worry, I’ll keep you warm,” he says as he lays you down on the bed, readjusting his position till he’s on top.

“I really think we should get some sleep,” you giggle when he kisses you cheek.

“This is how we build up your endurance… with more practice,” he leaves open mouthed kisses down your throat.

You laugh as you yank his hair to pull his face away from your skin. “Let me sleep! Good night.”

“You can sleep… I don’t mind,” he mumbles as his tongue teases one of your nipples, biting the hardened bud lightly.

“Toji! Behave!” you scold him in a not-so-convincing tone.

“If I had behaved, we wouldn’t be here,” he rolls his eyes as he gets back up to give you a long, lazy smooch till you’re both out of breath. When your lips part, he rolls to the side, collapsing on the bed next to you. 

He covers the thick blanket over your bodies before pulling you to his chest and kissing your shoulder with a soft ‘good night’. The act is surprising as you hadn’t really taken him for the cuddling type. You feel his boner stick out against your back once again and you laugh.

“Shh, this is all very new. Give me some time,” he teases, snaking his arm around your waist. You wrap your hand over his, letting yourself melt into his arms when he rubs soft circles over your belly. You involuntarily rub your ass against his hard on and he presses your stomach to still your movement.

“Don’t do that if you want to sleep,” he warns and you giggle as you close your eyes, the tiredness of the whole day taking over your senses as you fall asleep in his arms.

~~~

You wake up when you hear your phone ring from a distant corner. You try to move Toji’s heavy arm to free yourself but he pulls you in even closer.

“My phone’s ringing,” you whisper as you turn your head to look at him. His eyes are still closed as he grumbles in a low voice, “Let it.”

You still manage to wiggle yourself out of his grasp and quietly walk towards where your phone was lying on the floor near the door. Toji stirs and sits up, his eyes following your naked form as you pick up the call.

“Did you die in there or something?”, you wince when you hear Ema’s voice on the other end.

“Open the door, we’ve been out here for, like, 5 minutes now,” Lisa’s voice is more distant.

When your brain registers what they’re talking about, you slap a hand over your mouth as you stare at Toji.

“Give me 5 minutes,” you mutter before hanging up, not giving them a chance to protest. Toji gets off the bed and walks towards you.

“Ema and Lisa… they’re outside my room… and I'm here,” you sigh as you pick up your garments off the floor.

“Told you there’s no point in hiding,” he says, tucking a loose strand behind your ear, “I’ll walk you to your room.”

You simply narrow your eyes at him with a ‘yeah, right’. He takes the dress from your hand.

“I’m not joking…” he holds the dress up in front of you and shrugs, “Besides, you’re gonna have to wear my clothes anyway.”

You see that the zip is broken with the fabric looking frayed where the zip ends – you had heard it right, he did rip your dress last night.

“I really liked that dress,” you pout but it’s far from a complaint. You know you cannot complain after a night like that.

“I liked it too… it gave me a really hard time the entire night,” he gives you a quick peck, far from apologetic, “I’ll get you one just like it.”

You simply blush at his words before pressing your hands on his chest, “Fineee, get me something to wear.”

He squeezes your ass once before walking away to his suitcase. You put on your thong and bra back on just as he returns with a t-shirt and sweatpants. You snatch them out of his hands and put them on quickly. 

He laughs at how baggy his sweats are, the compression t-shirt is still okay in comparison, “Guess it’s too big for you?”

You crinkle your nose, cringing at his joke as you secure the drawstring tightly to keep the pants from sliding down, “No, it’s not that big.”

“Is that so?”, he wraps his arms around your waist, caging you in, “Do I need to refresh your memory?”

“Toji! My friends are waiting!” you slap his chest and he laughs, leaning down to kiss you.

“Let them,” he moves his lips down to your jaw.

“No, let’s leave,” you wiggle your way out of his arms, shoving your phone in the pocket of his sweats before picking up your heels to carry them in one hand. He quickly puts on a different pair of sweatpants with an oversized t-shirt and sliders before grabbing his keycard. 

“Oh wait… I think my keycard is in your jacket from yesterday,” you turn around when you’re at the door to find him already rummaging through the pockets to retrieve it. You grin at him and he simply shrugs, “Told you, I’m a gentleman.”

You roll your eyes again as he opens the door and you quickly make your way to the elevator. Toji’s hand is resting on your lower back when the elevator dings and the doors open. 

You know there’s no point in hiding, yet you walk ahead of him as you notice your two friends standing outside your room. Before you have a chance to greet them, you hear Toji’s booming voice from behind, “Morning, ladies!”

You brace yourself for their reaction and it’s just as animated as you’d expected. They don't try to be subtle about it as they smirk at you while greeting the man in unison and you realise it's a lost cause trying to keep it a secret.

And it surely doesn’t help that Toji makes it a point to grab your jaw and kiss you goodbye in front of the two for no damn reason, as if it weren’t already obvious about what had transpired between you two. 

As he leaves, you smile at him, watching him walk away. The heat rushes to your cheek when you hear Ema fake a cough and you turn around to look at your friends. 

“Open the door ASAP! I wanna know everything,” Lisa squeals and you know your friends would not leave you alone until you went into heavy detail about the whole night.

~fin~

[csl0ml]

So needy… ?pt1?

This is my first time EVER writing a fanfic so it’s my first time writing smut so be nice please 😔

I actually hate this so much 😭

It’s also REALLY long so 😭

Chris x fem reader!!

Chris and reader are dating

Warnings‼️‼️

smut, smut, smut, and smut, the tiniest (like one sentence) of fluff so 🤷‍♀️

pink: you

orange: Chris

Not proofread so 🤷‍♀️

Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Chris omg will you please leave me alone?”

lately Chris has been needy and whiny for no fucking reason.

It’s like he’s going through heat

“Come on ma please, I need you so bad”

I groan in frustration “I could care less go jerk off or something”

Chris frowns “my hand doesn’t feel as good as yours”

I’m still working on something for my job so even if I wanted to help Chris out I literally couldn’t

“Chris I’m working please just go cum and let me be”

“Fine.” Chris is obviously pissed and walks into our shared bedroom and slams the door

“You’re acting like a stubborn teenager!!” I shout at him

“Fuck you.” He responds

…

A couple hours later I’m on the couch watching a movie.

I pull out my phone and see I have a notification.

Chris sent me snap. Weird since we’re in the same house.

When I click on it my mouth drops.

It’s a picture of his dick dripping pre-cum, it’s veiny, it’s not too long, not too thick, it’s perfect.

I immediately turn off the tv and walk to our bedroom. When I get to the door I hear quiet whimper, whines, and cries.

“P-please y/n I need you”

wow I never thought of Chris as the type to beg and whine.

When I open the door I see Chris with his pants around his ankles, dick sticking out of his boxers and his eyes swollen and red from crying.

“Awe baby, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” I ask him as I walk over and sit on the bed. I knew what was wrong. I knew why he was upset. He was so horny and hard it hurt him. But we have a deal. We can’t touch ourselves without permission.

“ I-I’m so hard it hurts. please ma, touch me.”

“Hmm I don’t know. You were distracting me from my work I don’t know if you deserve it.”

His eyes go wide and he moves closer to me. “No! Please I’ll be a good boy I promise! I need you so bad I might die if I don’t cum soon”

I then get an idea.

“Well…last time I checked good boys don’t whine and distract mommy when she’s trying to work and busy.”

Chris looks like he’s about to break down again.

“I’ll make you a deal. If you be a really good boy I’ll let you cum.”

“Yes! Please I’ll do anything to cum I just need it so badly.” Chris almost cried tears of happiness.

“oh but you don’t get to come right now… good boys let mommy cum first. That’s how it’s always been”

Chris burst into tears when I said that.

I grab his face and wipe his tears.

I say in a baby/mocking voice “oh baby I know you’re horny and so hard but you would’ve been able to cum earlier if you weren’t so needy.”

“I-I’m s-sorry. I just needed you so bad I couldn’t wait”

“I understand. But now you’re gonna have to wait. Right now mommy’s gonna cum first okay?”

All I get in response is a nod from Chris.

I push Chris against the head board of the bed and tell him not to touch himself until I tell him to.

I get up and strip. I start with my shirt. Then my pants. But I leave my panties and bra on.

Chris whimpers at the sight of me.

I then walk over to the night stand and open the bottom drawer. I pull out a dildo and a vibrator.

Chris knew I had toys. But because of our deal I didn’t use them unless he told me I could.

I walk back to the bed and get myself situated.

I pull my panties to the side which have a huge wet spot due to how wet I was. I was practically dripping everywhere just from watching Chris whine.

I slowly rub my clit. I let out a quiet moan. I look at Chris and see that he’s just sitting there in awe. It’s taking him every single muscle in his body not to start jerking off.

Once I’m done rubbing my clit I slowly slide the dildo into my hole. My head shoots back in pleasure and I let out such a load moan I wouldn’t be surprised if the neighbors heard.

I look at Chris and then his dick. His dick is twitching and dripping pre-cum.

I start sliding the dildo in and out of my dripping pussy. I then grab the vibrator I got from the night stand and put it on my clit.

My back arches from the amount of pleasure and I let out a moan.

“Oh my god Chris” I moan.

I look at Chris and he mumbles something.

“What’d you say baby?”

“I said you look so beautiful ma.”

I thank him by getting up and giving him a kiss.

The kiss then turns into a very sloppy messy make out session.

I pull away from Chris and he frowns

“Why’d you stop”

“Because I need to cum first and then you can get everything you want”

I lay back down and slide the dildo in and out again. I place the vibrator on my clit again. I’m moaning so loud my throat hurts.

I can feel the knot in my stomach get closer.

“I-I’m close Chris omg”

I then find my self having an orgasm.

I start riding out my high on the dildo. Once I’m calm again I look at Chris.

He’s crying again.

I take the dildo out, turn off the vibrator and sit infront of him. “What’s wrong baby?” not actually knowing what’s wrong.

“I- I just don’t know how I ended up with someone so gorgeous. and my cock is throbbing and it hurts”

I laugh at his statement

“Don’t worry baby. You were such a good boy and didn’t touch yourself so now you get to cum”

I get down face to face with his dick and start licking his tip.

Chris’s head shoots back in pleasure. He’s a moaning mess.

“Omg yes y/n don’t stop”

“You’re mouth feels amazing”

“It feels so good baby”

All this stuff he’s saying while he’s moaning

I take his whole dick. It’s hitting the back of my throat and I’m trying my hardest not to gag.

“I’m close”

I just hum in response.

The vibration from my hum must have been to much because next thing I know Chris was practically screaming my name.

He’s coming down my throat as he grips my hair. I sallow his cum and look up at him.

There’s tears in eyes from the pleasure.

“You did so good baby. You were such a good boy.”

“Thank you mamas”

“Want me to fuck you now?”

Part two?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[dracowars]

Do you think you could write a part two of The Right Thing? It’s so good🥺👉🏼👈🏼

the right thing² | draco malfoy

pairing: draco x slytherin!reader

word count: 3,5k

summary: where draco and y/n meet again after her betrayal

a/n: i know it took ages but i finally managed to write the sequel to the right thing, yayyy!! since this is one of the few stories that i came up with by myself from scratch, it truly means a lot to me and made it so much more difficult to write a part II because i really wanted it to be perfect >.< so many of you have been asking for a second part, so here we finally are (check out the first part here) <3 please make sure to leave a comment and reblog, it literally means the world to me and is so important! thank you for reading and for the constant support, i love every single one of you ♡♡♡

warnings: angst, violence/abuse, mentions of blood, mentions of severe injuries, mentions of death

universe: harry potter

Shocked and completely stunned, Draco stares at where you were still standing a few seconds ago. Where you were standing before you vanished into thin air and disappeared. Barely believing what just happened, Draco’s mind torments him by repeating how the dagger flies straight towards you over and over again, which is why Draco’s legs suddenly go very weak and he collapses.

He feels his mother trying to lift him back onto his feet, but Draco’s body no longer obeys his commands. The uncertainty is killing him. He is too weak and all that is left of his body is an empty and lifeless shell. Narcissa talks to him, but her words don’t get through to him, her voice far away, like hearing a sound through masses of water.

You are gone and with you, you took a part of him.

Draco doesn’t understand why you did what you did. Why you stood up for the enemies, for the people you were supposed to be hunting down and hand over to the Dark Lord. That was your task, your job as a Death Eater.

But by helping and freeing them, escaping with them, you decided against your own kin. Against Draco.

The chaos that surrounds him now as his aunt ferociously screams and can hardly be contained is only shut down when Voldemort steps into the living room through dark shadows, exactly on the spot where you disappeared moments before, a vicious grin on his lips as he is holding his wand in his bony hands, ready to strike. As soon as he takes a look around, however, his facial expression changes drastically.

The pain that Draco has to endure shortly afterwards is unbearable.

════════════

Breathing heavily, you are roughly placed on top of a wooden table, your entire body trembling in pain while the people around you blur before your eyes, turning into mere silhouettes. Tears stream down your cheeks from the excruciating pain, your hands clasped around the dagger whose sharp blade has disappeared into your abdomen, streaked with blood. During apparating here, it felt like your entire body was falling apart, shredding, bursting. Hardly able to grasp a clear thought, there is only one thing that comes to your mind at this moment.

“D-Draco.”

“She is bleeding out! We need to do something”, you hear Hermione say from afar, your world spinning around you as your limbs grow limp and the blood in your veins slows down. You perceive that you are being touched, here and there you feel a little sensation, but your eyes no longer focus and black dots cloud your vision.

The pain you feel as the dagger leaves your body is unbearable.

════════════

Slightly limping, you follow the others through the corridors, some of which are now hardly recognizable as such. There is rubble and ash everywhere, no wall remains intact. But some of them keep the castle upright with their last strength and allow you to escape through the long hallways. Hermione leads the way, the map of Hogwarts imprinted deep inside of her, so you won’t get lost, with you and Ron close behind. Harry has gone the other way with Luna and Neville to help other students.

Your hand gently pressed against your side where, beneath layers of thick bandages, the wound inflicted by Bellatrix denounces, makes itself known with every step, taunting you. Your will is stronger though and you don’t let it influence you, following your new friends to a part of the castle that had remained more or less intact. What you did not expect, however, is that two Death Eaters are waiting for you, wanting to put an end to this. Two Death Eaters who look all to familiar to you: Dolohov and Goyle Sr.

“Ah, ah, ah. Who do we have here?”, Dolohov laughs enthusiastically, his wand playfully waving between his fingers as if neither of you were remotely a threat to him. Immediately, he gets your blood pumping through your veins with that disgusting grin of his.

“If that isn’t little Y/L/N”, Goyle Sr. adds as they both slowly walk closer to you. “Foul traitor.”

“Your father is so terribly disappointed in you, dear. Oh! And don’t even get me started on the Dark Lord. He really wasn’t thrilled when he heard about your betrayal”, Dolohov mentions with mock pity, lower lip pushed out in a pout. The mention of your father makes you heart beat even faster and the thoughts you have been suppressing ever since come crashing down on you.

“Your poor father, he suffered a lot because of you”, Dolohov laughs mischievously, turning the seething anger inside of you into a roaring fire. “Your mother really died in vain just to give birth to a monstrosity like you. What a shame, I truly liked her.”

With those last words, he finally goes too far and you immediately fire off a magic spell that sends him slamming across the corridor and against he last remains of a stone wall. Ruthlessly, you let out all your anger on Goyle Sr., who ends up lying on the ground next to his friend, unconscious. Dolohov, who gets up quickly, doesn’t have a change against you and your friends anymore, but still manages to cause a streak of purple flames with a sudden slashing movement of his wand at the last moment, severely burning your arm. Eventually the two Death Eaters are knocked out and weakness overcomes you for a few seconds, making you stagger sideways. If it wasn’t for Ron and Hermione quickly supporting you, you would have made contact with the hard ground.

A while ago, these two men were part of your family, they had the same goals as you before you decided to follow the only right one. You can vividly remember Dolohov teaching you new curses and Goyle Sr. raving about your upcoming marriage to Draco Malfoy.

Draco.

“Come on, Y/N. We have to move on!”, Ron shakes you back into reality, to the here and now, before you regain enough strength to stand up unaided. Without further talking about what just happened and the ease with which you suddenly defeated the two wizards, you continue running through the hallways, which are echoing with agonized screams and explosions. The flesh wound caused by the flames on your forearm burns at the contact with air and the puncture site on your abdomen tugs uncomfortably, slowly eroding your strength.

After escaping Malfoy Manor a few days ago because of your help, there wasn’t much time to calm down and rest. Fleur and Hermione have done their best to sew up your wound and hurt you as little as possible in the process, but such a deep and fatal wound will take time to fully heal, probably leaving a scar that will forever remind you of your actions. Time you simply don’t have.

To this day, even now as you walk and fight through Hogwarts with two parts of the Golden Trio, you are not sure if your decision was the right one after all. Guilt plagues you every night, and the looks that Draco and his family gave you while committing your incredible betrayal haunted your dreams. You will never forget the disappointment on their faces, this sheer bewilderment. You have hurt numerous people who were so important to you with your actions and yet, you know deep down that it was the only right thing to do.

After a few minutes of fighting your way further through the castle, you come across the rest of your group that is currently in the process of defeating three Death Eaters. Quickly, you join the fight, but as soon as the Death Eaters see you, it suddenly seems a lot more important to kill the traitor than the Chosen One that the Dark Lord has been after for ages.

“Y/N!”, Harry shouts at you in panic, but unfortunately any warning comes too late and you are thrown through the air, landing on the hard ground several meters away with a loud bang. Desperate and in pain, you try to push yourself up with your arms but without success and you collapse again while the others are cornered by the Death Eaters.

A pain you haven’t felt in a long time runs through you all of a sudden and you quickly look at your arm, the source of this sudden pain. The black snake slowly coils around the skull, the tattoo moves on your skin and makes you cry out in pain before the realization hits you hard and you roll onto your side.

“Harry! He is coming!”, you yell at him, clutching your arching arm to your chest. Harry’s eyes widen when he hears you and he immediately understands what you mean. Luna and Ron rush in your directions to pick you up and flee with them, but unfortunately, they are nowhere near you when the ceiling above you is hit by a Death Eater’s curse and collapses with a crash. Some of the pieces come dangerously close to you before the loud noise disappears and you find yourself separated from your group, from your friends.

Groaning in absolute pain, you pull yourself closer to a rock in front of a wall, finally managing to lean your back against it. Breathing heavily, you open your jacket, already tattered from the fighting, and look at your lower body. The thick bandage intended to protect your wound is almost brimming with blood. Softly cursing to yourself, you press your palm onto the red bandage, unable to suppress a cry of pain.

You should have suppressed it, however, as you have now drawn attention to yourself and you hear footsteps that are suddenly coming in your direction. Knowing that you are not able to escape in your state, you aim your raised wand at the end of the hallway, just waiting to cast the first spell you can think of to keep whoever it is away from you.

You just didn’t expect that person to be Narcissa Malfoy, turning around the corner. You are speechless for a moment, and without really thinking about it, you lower your wand as soon as her eyes meet yours. Abruptly, she stops, eyes wide and her own wand ready to fight, aimed squarely at you. If you didn’t know better, you would imagine her hands shaking with every step she takes towards you. Even if you wanted to, you wouldn’t have the strength to raise your wand now. Seeing her gave you a glimmer of hope, until bitter reality caught up to you.

She is a Death Eater and her only goal is to hunt down Harry Potter for the Dark Lord. If she runs into the traitor while doing so, she can quickly defeat her too.

But Narcissa does nothing of that sort, but suddenly lowers her wands as she seems to realize something, running towards you with quick steps, lifting her long black skirt so that she can get to you even faster.

“Y/N!”, she loudly says upon approaching you, noticing your dire condition. “Oh god, what happened? Dear, are you alright?”

Since you didn’t expect such a reaction, you are left speechless and the incredible pain you are still enduring doesn’t help. You open your mouth several times to answer her, but you can’t get a single word out. You don’t deserve her sympathy. Not after what you did. Not after you caused her so much suffering.

When Narcissa looks down at you and sees your wound, she sucks in her breath sharply, but quickly catches herself and looks you in the eyes.

“We will fix this, Y/N, ok? You just have to.. hold on a little longer”, Narcissa talks to you caringly and thinks about how to best get you out of here as quick as possible.

“Narcissa- Please don’t”, you stop her movement and grab her hand, unintentionally spilling your blood on her skin. You look at her with tears in your eyes. “I d-don’t deserve it.”

Horrified, Narcissa looks at you, examining your face for any signs that you actually mean what you are saying, and opens her mouth to say something, but…

“Mum?”, a deep voice suddenly sounds behind Narcissa and she turns around, giving you the opportunity to look at the corridor as well. Draco.

His body clad in a black suit that is already covered in dirt and ripped at the arms, Draco stands there looking over at you, the hand holding his wand clutched tightly at his side. As your eyes meet, pain rips through your broken heart, another piece breaking off. It feels like an eternity since you last looked at him, and yet a sense of security suddenly washes over you. Although Draco is exactly the person you can’t expect any protection from anymore.

But you didn’t think that he would come rushing towards you the second he realizes whose eyes he locked with. He kneels in front of you, taking your face in his hands firmly while leaning his forehead against yours. He should yell at you, he should ask you what the hell you were thinking, he should loathe you, and yet he touches you so tenderly as if you had never done anything wrong, as if you didn’t tear his heart into a thousand pieces.

“Oh, thank Merlin, you are alive”, Draco repeats over and over like a mantra, running his hands over your body without ever touching it for fear of losing you again. On the other hand, you thought that you were already lost in his eyes anyway.

“Please, Draco. Don’t-”

“I only saw how the dagger disappeared with you. It rushed right at you and I thought- I really thought..”, Draco stutters, not able to finish his sentence, and puts his hand on the back of your head, pulling it to his chest so he can place several feathery kisses on the crown of your head. “You are alive.”

With his hand on your cheek, he now looks deep into your eyes and although you expected to see pure hatred and raging anger in them, they are bathed in hope and affection only. The relief of knowing that you are alive even made him forget how much you actually hurt him. A pale scar runs along Draco’s cheek to his left eye that wasn’t there when you last saw him, and you hate yourself for it. Whatever happened to him, you weren’t there.

You raise your trembling hand to touch his skin, but as soon as you do so, Draco already grabs it and pulls it to his lips, kissing your knuckles. Your engagement ring is still glittering on your finger and Draco’s slightly simpler ring is still where you last saw it, on his finger. A quick stray glance at Narcissa, who is eyeing you with concern, is enough to finally make all the dams burst and the tears flow down your cheeks.

You thought they hated you. You thought you would never be able to face them again without them wanting you dead. But you were so incredibly and terribly wrong.

They are still your family. The family you never had but found in them. Family supports each other without limits and they are here now, with you. In the worst of times, they came to rescue you. That is what makes a true family and no blood in the world could ever compare.

“I’m so terribly sorry”, you whimper as Draco pulls you into the most loving hug you so desperately needed.

“Don’t apologize, angel. Please don’t apologize”, he softly whispers in your ear before kissing your forehead several times, wiping away your tears with his thumb, although there are some tears running down his own face as well. “You did the only right thing.”

“W-What?”

“You opened our eyes, Y/N. Family is and always has been the most important to us, but we seem to have lost sight of it”, Narcissa tells you gently, stroking your hair. “All these years we’ve been blinded. We supported something so terrible, contributed to what happens today, but that has to stop now. Never again do we want to be responsible for the suffering of others.”

A huge, heavy load falls off your shoulders and it seems to be evident on your face, because Draco softly runs his finger along your chin again.

Narcissa is right. You too have supported all of this for far too long, your father dragged you into all of this, even before you were born you were doomed to follow the Dark Lord unconditionally. Unlike Narcissa, unlike Draco, unlike your mother, you were the first to finally turn on Voldemort. And now they will follow you.

Everything ends today.

However, when you want to rise up to pull Narcissa into a hug the next moment, you are quickly thrown back into the bitterness of your reality. Your huge wound is still gaping at your stomach and the pain is unbearable. Narcissa and Draco exchange looks before Draco scoops you up in his arms without any hesitation. No matter how careful he is, you still whimper in pain and your vision is once again littered with black dots. Before the darkness invites you in, you hear the last few words between Draco and his mother from the distance.

“She needs help or she will-”

“I know someone who can help us.”

════════════

Sharply inhaling as if you were about to drown and are now surfacing, you awake from your unconsciousness, only to be greeted by three figures romping around you. Fear and terror runs through your veins, not knowing where you are or with whom.

“Vulnera Sanentur”, a deep voice repeats three times in a row, and you have to blink a few times to finally make your eyes focus. It is only when you see Draco, Narcissa, and Professor Snape in front of you that you realize all your pain is gone in an instant.

Looking down at yourself, you are in shock to see that the spot where your huge wound inflicted excruciating pain upon you is gone, only a small scar left to remind you of what you experienced. Carefully, you run your hand over it and when you don’t feel any pain, you look around, not knowing what to say or how to say it. They saved your life. Again.

“Now that she will be among the living for a bit longer, we must proceed with the plan”, Snape says bluntly, turning to Narcissa who is still eyeing you with concern. When your eyes meet, she manages to muster a small smile.

“What plan?”, you question, sitting up with Draco right by your side, just in case.

“Even though we have done horrible things, being at Voldemort’s side for years turns out to have its perks”, Snape explains gravely, motioning for you to follow.

════════════

You are completely surrounded, with only Death Eaters swarming around you who would like to see you dead immediately. And right in front of you, amidst the circle of his companions, is the Dark Lord himself. He clutches his wand in his bony hands, a victorious grin on his serpentine face. His malicious laughter rings out and soon everyone on his side joins in.

“Now it will end like this”, Voldemort speaks up in a voice as if announcing your end to the whole world. You stand back-to-back with Draco, your hands that are not holding your wands intertwined. Next to you your friends – Harry, Ron, Hermione, Fred and George, even Neville. They all stand by your side, facing the enemy for one last battle.

“You will never defeat us”, Draco announces proudly, telling the truth. Because Voldemort feels so sure about his victory that he apparently lost sight of how his followers feel about him. That is why he doesn’t see how the majority of his Death Eaters, including your father, who just had their wands pointed at you, is aiming at him now. That is why he doesn’t see how many have turned against him in all this time he has led with fear and terror. So, the last thing he sees is everyone turning against him and condemning him to death together, making the world a better place again.

As soon as he turns to ashes and dust before your eyes, you can’t believe it at first. And you don’t seem to be the only one with that feeling, because there is pure silence. At least for a few long seconds, until suddenly, loud and trembling, cheering breaks out and everyone is laying in each other’s arms.

Relieved, Draco pulls you into such a tight hug that it takes your breath away and the next moment, many other arms are wrapped around you. It is finally over.

There are a lot of casualties, a lot of injuries, a lot of dead. But in the end, you are still here, Draco and you, breathing, standing. And you created your very own happy ending for yourselves by doing the right thing.

[seelestia]

well, since you’re ok with it… here’s the reveal!

hello it is i, the harbinger of tears, 💠 anon <3 this is my main blog, while my writing blog is at @genshrineimpact. just block the tag: “minors dni” and you should be good!!

now, back to the topic at hand…

*war flashbacks* i-i need a moment *lays on ground and pulls blanket over head*

[ we’re having technical difficulties at the moment - please enjoy the brief intermission. ]

*wipes tears* ok am back what were we talking about again? oh yes, plot bunnies! i think that used to be an actual term, kind of like how we say 'brainrot' these days haha but yes, it certainly makes an adorable image!

i’m glad that you think so! thank you for being understanding and kind about this <3 ok we can compromise - you just tell me if i ever make you uncomfortable and i shall bonk myself lol

that’s so intriguing, i think most people wouldn’t know about it! ohhh an au, hm? very interesting indeed… maybe i should try and do some research myself hehe

i think you’re spot on for the superiority complex! a love triangle between these three sounds like it’ll get very messy… the two albedos playing 3d chess while the reader is just stuck in the middle like (· ω ·) ??

*clears throat* lia you are hallucinating wdym /j hahahah i know right??? literally none of them have similarities…. what is a ‘type’…. just like the concept of time, it is but an illusion to me… “you just fall for whoever you fall for” - yeah that sounds about right lmao

feel free to browse around my blog, but i don’t have much lol the 'god of war!reader au' series seems to be popular the past few days, and it’s been a super fun thing to write! but don’t feel pressured to do it, really! <3

IKR i was complaining to my brother about it like- seriously??? for the first day??? xiao is my main dps, and he’s practically useless (i’m so sorry bby) against that stupid thing ;_;

also yay, a taglist, sign me uppppp!

OML. HI, RIN !! it's nice to know the true identity of my 💠 anon without having to employ heizou. (/lh) and if you see a new follower with a melancholic albedo theme and a bio that says i follow cool people, that'd be me~

hehe, already done filtering the tag~ i am respectfully looking at the god of war!reader, (ab)normal day, and the universe abound series 👀 i also saw your edit of the game's voicelines to fit the god of war!reader AND IT FITS SO WELL. i don't have much experience with javascript or editing other than tumblr html, which may be why i am so in awe !! ;( i love the lore of the reader like the sibling adepti and the god of sun HNGGH this is what i meant when i say your brain >>> (/g)

who is this fine grandpa (/lh) man on the intermission screen??? 🔍 and the thought of saying, "psst, i have a plot bunny to give to you" is so cute <3 hehe, i'm always down for a new series made by you because fjejkdkks they're so good, HELLO?!?! but feel free to only focus on the ones you're working on, they deserve your attention the most rn ;D

BEING IN THE MIDDLE OF 2BEDO'S PLAYING CHESS, HELP. just know if susbedo lost, he'd bore hateful stares into the back of albedo's head and likely about to flip the whole table. (/lh)

the intermission is so suspicious that i can't help but suspect that you feel smth for that very same man... HMM. "just like the concept of time, it is but an illusion to me" rin, i think you've been spending too much time with zhongli. (/j)

YESYESYES !! the popularity of your god of war!reader au is SO VALID because the lore and their interactions with morax??? >>> your brain never ceases to amaze me !! fjekrksjds i can tell you put a lot of thought into it and the fact that you executed it so well??? aaaa, i love your works sm <3 (/g) i shall definitely find the time to binge your masterlist soon !! >:)

i don't think xiao's burst reaches that abomination when it's shooting missiles??? i don't have xiao because i lost the 50/50 to keqing on his first rerun and then pulled for yelan instead during 2.7 <//3 but i'd definitely pull for this boy the next time he comes around !! i got klee at guaranteed pity and tried pulling for heizou cons but ended up getting c1 kazuha at 15 pity instead (which i could've gotten for yoimiya but that is alright, i'm not one to dwell on regrets for longer than i needed) fwfjkekds

speaking of, is there anyone you're planning to pull for in the future, rin??? i'm at 13 pity + 50/50 rn on yoimiya's banner after getting c1 kazuha and if no one comes home, then i'll try my luck on the 3.0 banners !! saving particularly for al-haitham cough cough

[drewsdrearydays]

07.03.18

I don’t know what to say anymore. I am just so tired. I stared at my screen for ten whole minutes trying to think of where to start. Jose’s gone. So much has been happening and I think I’m reaching breaking point soon. I have now been to two funerals in the span of thirteen days. I don’t know what to think. I didn’t react horribly when I found out about Jose. I heard say those words over the telephone and suddenly there was silence everywhere. I had had this intense dread in me this entire week that something terrible was about to happen and then it did. I rushed to the crime scene immediately. The silence slowly faded away and was replaced by chaos of angry voices. I was so angry, I still am. At the killer for targetting Jose and at myself too. I should have been better, I should have accompanied Jose home as I had been doing throughout these past days, I should have called him when I reached home or at least had Yusuf walk him home. I did none of that and now Jose is dead. On paper, Jose and I never knew each other that deeply but the truth is, besides my grandfather and of course, Yusuf, Jose was my best friend. He literally watched me grow up. I had always given me anything I needed, laughter when I craved it and silence when I needed it. The library was my home and now that Jose isn't there anymore, I have this gnawing sense of homelessness eating at my insides. Where do I go now? I could see how much Jose had been suffering in his last days here. I wish I could have understood it or better, taken it away. 

I decided immediately that Jose’s autopsy had to be the fastest yet the most thorough one that I had ever done. Something inside me broke and crumbled away working on the body so closely and seeing his lifeless face so closely. Dead bodies and injuries never bothered me before, I had always been able to separate myself from it and be in a clinical mindset. Yet I couldn’t do it with Jose. Every close inspection of the violence that had occurred on his body had me walk away and burst into tears. I didn’t want to look at Jose like that, or anyone I love for that matter. I couldn’t objectify and dehumanise the body as I needed to. As I went over the cuts on Jose’s torso I could feel how the killer must have made them, slow and controlled with a knife that bore the same kind of paper-thin sharpness and precision that my own scalpel bears. It was haunting, to say the least. After hours and hours of mentally, physically and emotionally draining work, I had an autopsy ready to submit to Erin. The time of death could be approximated between 11:30 pm to 02:00 am. The stab wounds on Jose’s body were identical to the wounds on all the previous murders, the stab wound at the heart, the slash across the abdominal head, the cut on the back of the knee—it was all there. The only difference here was that Jose’s tongue had been cut off. All of these things I put in the autopsy but there is something else too. I have a feeling that there are two people behind this. It’s something about the ghost of the movement that can be picked up from the stab wounds and the ghost of the movement that can be picked up from the slicing of Jose's tongue. It’s almost as if…both of those things were done by different hands. There is no real technical or tangible tell for this, it’s mostly based on the feel I’ve got so I couldn’t add this to the autopsy but it's something I can’t ignore. 

I spent the next day, that is yesterday, planning Jose’s funeral. I went about town booking things and ordering things and I kept getting sympathetic looks from the townsfolk. I could also see that the town is electric with panic. There is distrust in the air and the streets are empty all day. 

Jose’s funeral happened today. Apparently, Antonio and he had already booked spots for themselves beside each other long back. Out of the hundred or so people living in this town, other than me only Klaudia, Erin, June, Yusuf, Mocair, Harry and Sariah turned up to the funeral. I was shocked and I felt so bitter but I tried to reason it away. Everyone was too scared to come. Everyone stood away from Mocair during the funeral. It was clear what was going on in everyone’s mind, what was going on in my mind too. Something was very wrong with Mocair, and given yesterday’s events, it puts him in a terrible spot. The funeral was a quick one and everyone left as soon as it was over. Yusuf stayed. He looked at me with those big brown eyes of his and asked me if I was fine but I had nothing to say. I leaned in for a hug but he only gave me a pat on my back. I could see something guarded in his eyes and I pulled away too. He left soon enough too, after standing with me silently for a while. I watched as Jose and Antonio, the two best friends, men who knew what it was to really love and the best of us, lay beside each other in their fresh graves and I prayed, for the first time in my life, that they both had found peace and happiness wherever they were. 

I am home now, writing this. I feel so lonely. Grandpa’s house is empty and it almost feels too big around me. I surprise myself as I think of the island and maybe going back after many months. There is no one I can talk to. Jose’s gone and Yusuf is all…weird these days. Maybe I’ll talk to Klaudia. I don’t know. All I do know is that Jose had found out something about the murders in the mania that had engulfed him in the last few days of his life which troubled him immensely. All he wanted to do was to solve this, to make all of this right. And that is exactly what I am going to do. 

[arconn]

Last night was *a lot*

I was stoked to hang w my homegirl Z for her birthday and she said she was getting dinner at a sushi spot. I should have payed attention when she said she has RESERVATIONS and at least checked out their menu… but of course I didn’t. She said she wasn’t even sure if everyone would show up and I instantly was like IM ABSOLUTELY GOING NOW I’m gonna make my homegirl feel super special!

I have $40 to my name until next Friday. I gathered a few cute things I got at the gem show for her present and wrote her a little note on some plain notepad paper and dressed like I would when I go to a show. This was a little black crop tank with a thrifted vest, some black bell bottom stretchy pants, and a super long comfy sweater. When we got there I was already kinda fucked up, I notice the place is SUPER fancy and most people are dressed in super fancy dinner dresses and suits. We ordered all together and I told the girl who was beside me (who also happened to be a server there) that I could really only get a single roll and maybe one drink for Z. I sipped my drink slowly and watched people order super expensive $30+ rolls and SUPER fancy drinks that didn’t even have the price on the menu. It made me low key anxious but I was coolin just listening to people chat and trying to include some people who had just joined.

We did birthday presents and, noticing no one had brought cake or anything, I offered to share a cupcake with Z and hold a lighter up so we could sing happy birthday. As soon as I left for the bathroom they started singing :-| I ran to grab the last part of the song and tried to remain calm as the check came and, between 8 of us, it was almost $700… they started splitting up things evenly and said we could all throw $120 each and I almost burst into tears trying to figure out how to tell everyone I had no money… clearly unlike everyone else at the table who was talking about their cars and money and stuff they had all night… I Venmo’d the girl who had been shoveling out bumps for me all night $20 and told her I’d hit her with another $40 when I get paid on Friday and she seemed cool with it. I still shed a few tears and tried to hide my face but the girl beside me was literally the one talking to everyone about the check. But now, of course overthinking it, maybe I was wrong to be so upset. Maybe not, I don’t know at that point.

They all were going to a show after that was sold out that I kept lying and saying I slept on tickets, knowing I just slept on them because I had no money. They’d all be talking about expensive cars and how they got out here and I just ended up telling them I’m on the rebuild, no I don’t have a car, I’m helping other people, etc. I just felt like a broke ass Baltimore bitch. I started to rethink my gift too, which I know I shouldn’t do, but I couldn’t stop myself. I feel proud of being so strong but at the same time I was so fucking embarrassed.

I went back to one of the girls I’d just met’s houses because we needed to stop at her place for her to change her shoes and it ended up being 3 of us blowing down. One of them made a comment about how one of their friends is a “taker” and never has anything and how she’s sus and they don’t hit her to hang anymore and of course I instantly, inside, started feeling a panic and like even more a piece of shit. I held it in though. I thanked everyone for their hospitality a little too much and went along to Blackbox to chill in the lounge (which was free) for a bit while everyone went into the main stage. They had mentioned doing the wristband swap and did for a couple of people but after watching them all walk by me, I just let it go and gave it two more songs and left. The one girl who was there in the lounge (that I had guided to the bathroom and then outside to see her man) already left w her dude and I was ready to go home. One of the girls texted me and asked where I was and I told her I was gone and thanked her and went about my night.

I slept almost 12 hours just trying to kill time until my closing shift tonight and now I’m eating a Sammy at a spot down the street and trying to keep my cool. I’m thinking about what imma do to save money so I’m never in that situation again, what I can do to get a car, and tattoos I wanna get to support my homie Casey and I just can’t afford it with my expensive apartment.

Tbh last night made me feel like I don’t belong here. I know it’s apart of my childhood experiences but I can’t shake it. I’ve come out AGAIN and I can’t help but feel so isolated in that too, especially with around my straight girl friends and distancing from my guy friends, whom I feel are either waiting for the right time to make a move or will feel super weird about me because they’ll assume that’s what I think they’re up to when I really just am coming off as pretentious *sigh*

[fandomvariousness]

other Eren fics -> x

Pairing: Eren x reader

Warnings: implied violence, smut: slight dumbification, slight dub-con, exhibitionism

Summary: Eren gets jealous when he sees you with Jean. Very jealous.

Word count: 1.6k

It was just before the golden hour, some of you were still practicing in the shooting range outside.

One booth was occupied by Mikasa, Armin and Eren, the latter wallowing in his menacing, somber mood, as he delivered his shots with deadly precision. He forbade himself to miss.

As he retracted from the rear sight, he noticed Armin’s uneasiness.

“What’s with you?” Eren question, still fumbling with the magazine.

Armin startled a bit, making Mikasa trace out what he was watching previously.

“N-Nothing,” Armin mumbled, loading bullets into his own rifle.

Mikasa sighed as she continued looking towards something, making Eren do the same.

When he laid eyes upon the sight, he understood why Armin was being so fidgety about it – because he knew how much Eren hates when Jean so much as looks at you. It’s just that now Jean wasn’t just looking, he was straight up teaching you how to properly hold the rifle or something.

Eren’s expression was unreadable as Armin and Mikasa regarded him with anticipation.

Eren felt anger bubbling deep in his chest as he roughly jerked the rifle, yanking out the empty shells like peas before replacing them with new ones. He looked away from the enraging sight as he focused at the target, imagining Jean’s forehead as the bullet pierced the very center once again.

“Thanks, Jean, that was really helpful. My arm doesn’t get so tired anymore.” you thanked him after he told you that your hand is kind of slouched while holding the rifle, and after gently lifting it up to form a straight line, somehow it wasn’t so tiring to hold it up anymore.

You were chit-chatting as you cleaned up the rifles, and literally a couple of seconds after you’ve put your gun back in place you felt Eren’s strong arm snake around your waist and yank you towards himself quite roughly.

“Let’s go,” he muttered, not even looking at you or Jean.

You were instantly annoyed at how he’s treating you like a rag doll, and then you realized why. You sighed, mentally face-palming yourself. Yes, Eren couldn’t stand when Jean was within arm’s reach to you, but you saw Jean as a friend, nothing more, and these jealousy tantrums of Eren’s sometimes drove you real crazy.

“I can walk by myself,” you countered, all passive-aggressive, retracting from his grasp.

He looked at you with his brows slightly furrowed as you made your way towards the barracks.

“Were you enjoying yourself?” he questioned, venom clearly hidden in his voice.

You rolled your eyes, knowing exactly what he means. “Yes, Eren, I do like to practice shooting.”

“Didn’t manage without the help?” he looked away again, striding ahead.

“No, actually, I didn’t. Thankfully, Jean was there to help me, because you just cooped up in the booth and imagined shooting all the Marleyans.”

You didn’t pay him another glance but you most certainly felt how he glared at you, furious at your little Jean appreciation moment.

“I’m going to shower.” you muttered before going away without paying him another glance.

~

You weren’t even able to properly enjoy the shower since your mind lingered on Eren. Secretly you were chiding yourself, because it hit differently when Eren ruffled his feathers acting all jealous just because of a few phrases exchanged with Jean.

You got back to your empty room, Sasha was nowhere to be seen – she probably went straight to the dining hall after practice. After putting your things back into place you heard someone storm into the room and turned your head towards the commotion expecting it to be Sasha, all ready to tell you about that delicious dinner she’s had, but it was Eren with a certain flame in his eyes.

You opened your mouth to question him when he shut the door behind him and locked it.

“What are you doing?” you tried to sound uninterested, but the shiver that ran down your spine spoke otherwise.

“Reminding you just who you belong to.” he was closing in on you, making you step back all the way across the room and bump your spine against the huge window that was revealing the whole area of the shooting grounds.

“Eren –” you mumbled before he cut you off by turning you around and harshly pressing your front to the window.

Your chest heaved up and down as your breath formed condensation on the glass. Eren’s breath tickled your ear as he pressed his semi-hard dick against your bottom, keeping your hands locked behind your back.

“Why don’t you look around the grounds?” he suggested nonchalantly.

Despite the growing arousal your eyebrows knitted in confusion, eyes frantically running around the grounds, not spotting anything in particular, until you saw some movement near the gun racks.

Jean was there, taking his time with cleaning the guns and placing them on the racks properly – he liked handling guns, so he was in no hurry.

“No,” you breathed out curtly, trying to squirm out of Eren’s iron grasp. “Eren, not here, what if –”

“What, you’re worried he’ll see us? His goggles are always set on you anyway, so he should like this, no?”

Your face heated at the possibility of immense embarrassment should Jean merely tip his head in your direction.

A broken gasp escaped your lips as Eren yanked your shirt and bra up, your breasts coming in contact with cold glass. As if it wasn’t enough, he purposely slapped his hand on the glass, sending vibrations all over it.

“Are you crazy?!” you hissed, trying to squirm away once again, to no avail.

You watched as Jean looked around for a second before returning back to the guns.

“Relax,” Eren spoke, softer this time. “don’t you love the thrill?”

Partially distracted by Eren peppering sloppy kissed on your neck, you thought about what he just said for a moment. You shivered at the thought of being railed by Eren right in front of Jean, the latter being oblivious of the lewdness and heat just further away from him.

You yelped as you felt Eren’s teeth sink into the curve where neck meets shoulder, arching your back and pressing your front further to the glass. He released your palms which came leaning on the glass immediately after, allowing Eren to press himself to your back, making you aware of his pulsating hardness.

Your whimpers stamped themselves on the glass in a form of little steam patches as Eren’s hand snuck upwards to fumble with your nipple, while the other slid all the way down under the hem of your panties, coming in contact with your throbbing center.

He chuckled against your cheek in between the kisses as he circled your clit. “I knew you’d love this, so wet for me already.”

Your eyes were shut close, your mind focused on rubbing yourself against Eren and chasing that release – you wouldn’t stop even if you’d open your eyes and see Jean looking straight at you two.

You wailed louder than expected when Eren licked a trail from your shoulder blade all the way to that sweet spot just under your ear.

“Fuck,” Eren breathed out, fumbling with his pants in desperate need to get rid of them.

“Need you, need you so bad,” you mewled impatiently as Eren dragged your sweatpants and panties down before guiding his slick from pre-cum tip against your equally slick entrance.

“You’re lucky I need you too, or you wouldn’t be getting it so easily,” he said just before he rammed into you, his fingers digging into the plush of your hips.

“Ah—fuck,” you cried out against the glass, tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.

“That’s right, baby,” Eren whispered against your ear as he started to pound into you rhythmically. “I’m gonna fuck you so stupid that next time Jean chats you up he’ll think you’re just an idiot.”

Your head was spinning as Eren’s words echoed in your head, hearing all fuzzy as his dick brushed against all the right places. Not to mention the fact that Jean is somewhere below you, the whole ordeal pleasing you a lot more than you could’ve ever thought.

You hung your head back as your tongue lolled out of your mouth, Eren continuing with his ministrations, caressing all the right places just before he hooked his hand under your knee and lifted it up, freeing your leg from the constraint of your pants, pressing it against the glass.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as a prolonged moan escaped your throat, the newly-established pose allowing Eren deeper access, his tip now repeatedly hitting your cervix.

“Eren,” you cried out incoherently in between his own groans. “I’m –I’m gonna—”

His fingers came to circle your clit again, helping you reach your bliss, which came just moments after, blinding you as you cried out against the window.

Eren’s pounding didn’t stop as your breasts jiggled against the glass, your palms leaning against it for balance, awaiting Eren’s own release. A broken moan flew out of his mouth as he pulled out suddenly and you felt his pulsating dick on the small of your back, his release bursting on your skin as he pressed you further against the glass.

“Fuck,” he muttered in sweet relief, lightly slapping your behind.

“I need to shower again.” you chuckled, wiping the cum from your back and pulling your pants up.

“Let’s go.”

You both went away without another glance to the shooting grounds. Maybe it’s good you didn’t look, because you would’ve seen Jean’s deeply blushing face after he witnessed the last moments of your and Eren’s venture.

[workofheart]

Whooaa drabble game!! Congrats on 200 followers!! ❤️❤️

For the game, could u do Bodyguard Levi x Reader in modern au, promp 38 + 45 please? And add some smut if u don't mind 👀

coming right up 😘 thank you for requesting! ik you said add some smut but it’s literally just all smut bc i couldn’t help myself and got carried away lol

hired gun’s desire | bodyguard! levi + “louder, princess” + “make me” 

warnings: fem reader, smut (dom/sub elements, rough & jealous levi, dirty talk, unprotected sex), 18+ minors dni

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

levi’s relationship with you has always dangerously teetered the line between personal bodyguard, professional babysitter, and ready-on-the-go boyfriend. your father had hired him months ago for your protection from his enemies, one of the best guards in the nation with a renowned skill set that would have anyone who even looked at you the wrong way trembling with fear when they saw him beside you.

tonight though, he’d had enough. your teasing at the grand ball was relentless, flirting with stuck up rich boys right where he could see you, shooting him inviting looks across the hall as you fiddled with their neck ties. you knew how much it ate away at him with the way he couldn’t intervene without suspicion of you being in danger.

and now that you’re splayed naked underneath him on a hotel room bed, that line has been most certainly thrown to the wind, his desire for you more evident than ever before.

his blazer and button up have long been strewn on the floor, as has your dress and shawl. “you think they could ever do for you what i do for you?” he mutters lowly, sucking harsh, wet marks into the skin just below your jaw. 

he hates to admit it but he’s jealous, your earlier actions flashing through his mind as he licks down your neck, a mixture of anger and lust flowing through him that ensures that you won’t be leaving this bed for a long time. 

his fingertips trail down your front, brushing lightly against your stomach and across your inner thighs. by now, your pussy is aching for any sort of contact, squirming as you try to bring his hips closer to yours.

holding you still, he gently presses the pad of his thumb to your clit, obviously swollen through the thin fabric of your panties, grinning as you clench around nothing.

he presses into the damp spot that has formed so messily against the cloth, tugging as gasp from your lips. “you’re so wet, you’re making me think you did it on purpose,” he mumbles into your ear, gravelly voice sending a shiver down your back. “but don’t worry, i’ll give you what you want.”

he swiftly pushes your panties to the side, deft finger sliding through your slick. he moves back up to plant his fervent mouth on yours, holding himself up with an elbow besides your head. without warning, he plunges two fingers inside you and catches your collateral moan with his lips, his resolve thinning with the way you struggle to kiss him back.

feeling your body tremble, he pushes his fingertips right up against where you need him, rubbing them against your walls in expert motions that have you falling apart. 

“right here, huh?”

your hands grip at his neck and arms, searching to find something to hold on to. his condescending tone has you sinking into submission, his expression borderline sadistic as he holds your stare, your half-mast eyes desperately trying to stay open.

he pulls back from your mouth with a heavy groan, removing his fingers from your begging hole. there’s no hesitation as he brings them to his mouth, licking up every inch of your arousal.

“arms up,” he says shortly, leaning back on his knees to undo his belt buckle.

his hands drawing back from you gives your head the time to see through the fog, and a stupid burst of courage. 

“make me,” you say breathlessly, watching him still his movements. his eyes flick up to you, gaze dark and heavy on your flushing body. the look levi sends you wipes the teasing grin right off your face, immediately regretting your words.

scoffing, he pulls his belt from his waist and tosses it to the floor. “you want me to be mean? fine, i’ll be mean.”

sometimes you forget just how strong he is, but the moment he grips your hips and flips you over onto your stomach, tossing you into the mattress, you’re reminded well and clear how easily he can take you.

you swallow and take a deep breath, fisting the sheets below you as you prepare yourself for what you’ve gotten yourself into. 

“look at you,” he spits, fingers digging into your plush thighs as he maneuvers you into place for him, “need me to look after you, need me to protect you, need me to fuck you.”

his hands hook around your hips and brings your ass up until you’re on your knees. levi grips his cock, pumping himself a few times before slotting himself between your spread knees. his tip prods the heat of your drooling pussy, arousal glistening as it coats his shaft, and thrusts into you firm and rough. 

your lips fall open at the feeling of him sliding into you completely, filling you up perfectly. he draws almost all the way back out before dipping back in, throbbing at the squelch of your wetness parting for him. then, he starts moving his hips steadily, and soon enough, his pace is absolutely punishing.

your mind has gone positively blank as levi’s cock fucks every coherent thought out of your brain except for him. 

before you can process what’s happening, his hands wrap around your wrists and pull your back tight to his chest. the angle has you keening, his tip dragging deliciously against your sweet spot.

he groans, feeling you flutter around him. “you like that, don’t you?”

you do, you do, but you can only respond in brainless, breathy whimpers. he lets out a low laugh as he mercilessly pumps in and out of you, hands still restraining your own and keeping you pressed to him.

“not so mouthy now, are you? come on, who’s making you feel so good?”

hand trailing down your burning skin, his fingers find your clit, making quick work of unraveling you beneath him. your body jerks, unable to control yourself with the pleasure he’s forcing on you.

“f-fuck…” you whine, levi urging moan after shameless moan from your throat. “levi, ah!”

“louder, princess. answer me.”

you’re near tears, edging closer and closer to your orgasm, lewd whines pouring from you uncontrollably. 

“levi, fuck, you are!”

he feels his cheeks flush; your cries are music to his ears.

“that’s right,” he groans, fingers rubbing impossibly tight, rapid circles into your sensitive bud. “cum for me.”

your body obeys his command immediately, head falling back onto his shoulder, practically gushing around him as the taught coil in your stomach finally snaps and waves of blinding pleasure roll through you. broken moans flood past your lips as he refuses to let up, his climax approaching with the way your pussy flutters around him.

his eyes squeezing shut, levi drops his head to the crook of your neck, biting down on the junction to stifle the noises spilling from him. he stills, hot thick, hot ropes of cum cover your walls as he tenses through his orgasm.

a shaky breath of laughter escapes you as you catch your breath. he returns it with a quirk of a smile through his panting, hair falling in front of his face as his palm strokes your waist to help you come down from your high.

“let’s get back downstairs before someone notices we’re missing,” he mutters with a sigh, planting tender, short kisses along your jaw, “i don’t want to be fired.”

[rebeccccccaaa]

Hey love! I don’t know if you’re comfortable with writing sub!bucky but if u are can u write like maybe a headcanon where ever since his tragic past bucky needs someone in his life to help him feel like he doesn’t need to carry a burden so he has a dom/sub relationship with reader. Thanks so much!! ❤️

 i freaking loveeeee this 🥰 thanks for the concept babe! i’ve never written dom!reader because i am not a dominent person lmao but hopefully i did ok and did your concept justice! sorry this took long too lolll

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: smut 18+ (dom!reader x sub!bucky), sad bucky, little bit of angst, mentions of PTSD, bi!reader btw ;)

So I imagine like you and Bucky are hanging out one day and you see him visibly tense.

He's like on the verge of tears. His nightmares have been getting worse, often keeping him from sleeping for hours on end.

"Hey, bud. Are you okay?" you asked.

"Uh, I uh, I'm fine. I'm just a little tired, that's all," he responded. 

“Ok,” you simply replied, not wanting to bug him.

It was quiet for a bit, the only sound was the vocal nonsense coming from the tv. Bucky awkwardly moved still visibly tensed until you had enough. You paused the movie and turned to face him.

“Come on, tell me what’s up,” you said to him.

“It’s fine. I think I just need to take a nap or something,” he said rubbing his eyes. 

“Why won’t you tell me what’s wrong? It’s ok, you know,” You said rubbing his shoulder.

“I don’t burden you with all my problems,” he chuckled but you didn’t laugh.

“I feel like I have all this baggage and I don’t know what to do with it. Shuri removed the words from my head and the PTSD has gotten better from what Banner has told me, but I still feel like everytime I open my mouth I’m annoying someone with my problems.”

“Bucky, what you went through would have driven anyone mad. For you to stand here now the way you are with friends who love you and care so much about you is so special. Something not everyone has.”

“I know. I know. How do I stop feeling like a burden. I need something to make feel grounded again you know?”

You knew exactly what he was talking about; and you sure know how to feel better but you don’t if that’s something he’s willing to do.

“Have you, and you can totally say no, ever thought about enetering a dom/sub relationship? I used to be in one when I got out of the Red Room, dominent of course,” you smiled.

Genuinely though, you met a gal looking for a dom. You needed a sense of control over something, anything, for once in your life.

“Did it help you?” He asked shyly.

“It made me feel better,” you responded.

“I haven’t had many partners so I wouldn’t call myself a professional but I took care of the them.” 

“Can you take care of me?” He whispered.

You stuttered after hesitating. You were extremely attracted to Bucky and being his dom wouldn’t help your case. 

“If you’re uncomfortable, doll, you can say no. I’m not the only one who has say; I mean I asked you first.”

“No, it’s just...” 

“Just what, doll?” Bucky got closer to you and you literally smell his delightful cologne that radiating off his extremely warm body. You were getting flustered.

“Bucky, I, I really like you,” you huffed, “and I don’t want to do this with no strings because that would kinda hurt too much.”

“Y/n,” Bucky practically moaned.

“I’ve spent everyday that I’ve known you dreaming about what having you in arms would be like.”

“Bucky,” you whispered against his lips.

You two bursted through the door to your room tugging at each other cothes, desperately attacking each other’s lips. You pushed Bucky down onto the bed after he stripped his shirt. 

You crawled up his body before straddling his hips. Bucky grabbed your hips but you smack them and pulled away to tell him, no touching. You grabbed his hand and placed them above his head.

“These move and I walk out, got it?”

He simply nodded.

“Yes ma’am,” you clarified.

“Yes ma’am,” he wimpered.

You moved your hips back and forth grinding against Bucky evident hard on. He whined and moaned loudly making you wetter and wetter with every passing second. 

You stepped back, making direct eye contact with Bucky who didn’t dare move an inch. Slowly and torturously you took off each pieace of clothing on your body. 

Through his sweatpants, you could see him getting harder with article coming off your body. he wimpered and whined seeing your full body in display naked in all it’s glory. 

You picked up your nude lace panties and walked over to Bucky smirking like the devil. You stuffed your panties in Bucky mouth and he gladly bit down on them.

“Not a fucking sound,” you purred in his ear.

You pulled his pants down along with his boxers, then climbed back to your rightful spot settled on his hips. You lined yourself over his erected cock and slid down slowly since he was considerably bigger than any of your past partners. 

You moaned as you moved up and down boucning his cock. You even at one point moaned extra loud just to spite the gorgeous being under you because you had told him you’d leave if he made a noise.

Bucky heavily panted underneath you tears formed in his eyes; not a single sound came out of him though. You were impressed. His hips thrusted upwards to meet in time with your bouncing. 

You chased your oragsm, skin slapping eachoing in the room. Bucky started grunting but you couldn’t care less at this point. Euhporia was washing over you.

You fell forward pulling your panties out of Bucky’s mouth. He wrapped his arms around and you kicked the blanket over yourselves with your feet; Bucky pulling the rest of way up. 

“Maybe next time we can use my toybox,” you kissed his neck.

“Your what-?”

[keanureevesisbae]

But professor… - c.9

Summary: Walter and Penny can almost welcome their kid, however Penny starts to become very anxious

Professor!Walter Marshall x Penny Townsend (Asian ofc)

Wordcount: 2.3k

Warnings: Just mentions of punching people

Masterlist // But professor… masterlist // Previous chapter //

I’m thirty weeks pregnant and I know that I have around eight to ten weeks to go, however, this pregnancy has been pretty straining on my back, my pelvis and basically my entire body. Moving around is painful and my mom is over at our place a lot of the time to help me out. I’m thanking the heavens that I am not doing cosmetology school now as well, knowing for a fact that I probably couldn’t keep up at all.

If I’m not sitting on the couch reading, I’m crying because I am sitting in the nursery and think about having a little baby and all the bad things that could happen to them.

Walter is drained from a rough day of patrolling and he plops next to me on the couch. Just like any other day, I barely moved, however he still asks me the question.

‘How was your day, princess?’

‘Boring,’ I mumble. ‘How was yours?’

He simply shrugs, probably because something happened and he doesn’t want me to worry. I rest my head against his chest and without thinking it seems, he places his hand on my stomach. ‘Have they been good to you?’ he asks

‘They sure have been,’ I chuckle. ‘Just hate the fact that I’m practically glued to the couch.’

Walter nods, pressing a kiss on top of my head. I know he worries a lot and therefore confides to my mom, asking her what more he can do to help me out. Walter is being the perfect boyfriend, because even my mom said that he is doing literally all he can to help me out. One night I found him scrolling and searching for tricks to ease the pain and discomfort, though he never lets me in on it.

‘If you’re up for it, we could have dinner,’ he says, ‘somewhere other than our living room.’

‘Where do you want to go?’

‘I don’t know what you’re craving. I’m up for anything.’

‘Pizza?’ I ask. ‘I would really love a Hawaiian Pizza.’

Walter frowns for a second—probably remembering how I told him multiple times that I hate pineapple on pizza—but then he nods. ‘Of course, princess.’

✎ ✎ ✎

We’re sitting at a restaurant across from each other and it’s nice to be out and about again. I mean, I go to town with my parents a lot, I hang out with the ladies from the pregnancy class, but going out with Walter has been a while, especially because he has been working long hours and I’m tired after one trip to anywhere basically.

Walter actually stretched out his leg underneath the table, towards my side, so I can rest my feet on it. Every time I have a crust left, I hand it over to him and with a small smile he accepts them. ‘So,’ I say, ‘I’ve been thinking about a name.’

‘Tell me.’

‘I would say that for a girl we could call her Emma.’

Walter tilts his head. ‘Emma Marshall, sounds cute,’ he says with a smile. ‘You have a name for when it’s a boy?’

I shrug. ‘I don’t know. I actually think they’re a girl.’

He starts to laugh. ‘Why do you think that, princess?’

‘Just a gut feeling,’ I chuckle. ‘What do you think?’

‘I have no idea,’ he says, holding out his hand for me to take. When I placed mine in his, he adds: ‘I actually have a name for a boy. Wanna hear?’

‘Always.’

‘Declan.’

Oh, that’s a lovely name. I don’t think I even know someone who is named Declan. ‘Declan Marshall. That sounds so cute. I absolutely adore it, Walter.’

Walter smiles and gives me a kiss on my hand. ‘We’ll see how we name them.’

‘Yeah,’ I chuckle. ‘Just around ten weeks or less,’ I say. ‘Kinda nervous.’

‘Why’s that?’

‘It’s giving birth, Walter. That’s scary. All these other ladies are so confident and proud of what their bodies can do and all. I mean, sure, that’s awesome, but it also terrifies me.’

‘Understandable,’ he says. ‘I’ll be there for you, every step of the way.’

‘I know,’ I chuckle. ‘It’s just that… I don’t know. With being pregnant, it’s just all a fantasy. With a newborn, it’s the real deal.’

Walter nods, taking in my worries. ‘Well,’ he says, ‘you and I can manage.’

‘You’re being awfully nonchalant about it.’

‘That’s because I need to stay calm for you. Believe me, princess, I’m freaking out on the inside.’

I frown, because that’s the first time he actually told me those words. Usually he says that he cannot wait for this baby to arrive, though it is a little scary every now and then, but saying he is freaking out?

That’s new.

‘What?’ I ask him. ‘Are you serious?’

He nods. ‘I mean, being a parent is difficult. Growing up I didn’t have the love and support I needed. I basically raised myself and judging from the person I am today, I didn’t really do a good job.’

‘You did an excellent job,’ I retort. I know about his youth and how he had to raise himself, how you can still notice it in his day to day life. ‘Walter, please tell me about your worries. You don’t always need to be the protective big bear who prevents me from any harm. I’m a big girl and I need you to confide with me. Please?’

He sighs as he is looking everywhere but to me. This is hard, I can see it, but from the looks of it, he is gonna agree with me. ‘Okay, I’ll try.’

✎ ✎ ✎

Dinner ended not so great. As we were walking back from the restaurant to our car, two guys thought it was necessary to whistle at me (I didn’t even notice at first, but then Walter’s entire demeanor changed, so that’s how I was informed about the matter).

Let’s just say, it evolved into an argument and then one of the guys thought it was an excellent idea to push Walter. I applaud him for having the guts to push my boyfriend, but it was honestly one of the stupidest things for him to do, because Walter wouldn’t be Walter if he punched the guy and his friend.

Multiple times.

I have been ignoring him for the entire drive and once we’re home, I still don’t know what to say to him.

‘Princess,’ he whispers, carefully trying to approach me as I’m sitting on the edge of the bed in his shirt. ‘Please talk to me.’

I purse my lips together, as tears burn in my eyes.

He sits behind me, placing his hands on my upper arms. ‘I’m sorry,’ he says.

‘Sorry for what?’

‘For scaring you. I was just protecting you, darling.’

‘What’s wrong with just ignoring the matter, Walter?’ I ask him, turning to the side so I can look at him without craning my neck. ‘You scared me back there.’

‘I’m not gonna let some dip shit whistle at you, especially not when I’m next to you,’ he defends himself.

‘You’re an officer,’ I tell him. ‘I don’t think this is proper behavior.’

‘I wasn’t gonna let anything happen to you,’ Walter retorts.

‘That’s not the point. The point is you put yourself in danger.’

‘Hardly.’

I glare at him. ‘I don’t like this,’ I say. ‘Have you any idea how stressful it was for me? You know what, never mind. I’m going to sleep.’

He scoots back and I wrap my arms around the pregnancy pillow, with my back towards him. I love Walter, I really do, but this… I saw it all unfolding in front of my eyes.

It would start with an argument, some light pushing, until the other guys would pull out a knife, stab Walter, which would result in a trip to the hospital. Possibility of death. Me having to bury the father of my child.

I push my face in the soft fabric of the pillow, as hot tears slide over my cheeks. Walter sighs deeply next to me and starts to toss and turn next to me. His leg bumps into mine and it causes him to hold his breath. ‘Sorry, Penny,’ he says.

I dry my cheeks on the pillow. ‘Walter,’ I whisper, ‘you know I worry when you go to work.’

‘I know,’ he says, ‘but you don’t need to.’

‘You’re gonna be the father of our kid,’ I continue, ‘and I’d like to raise them with you, not in memory of you.’

‘Princess,’ he whispers, ‘we’re gonna raise this kid and eventual others together. You know, before I met you, I was an adrenaline junkie, detective or not. I got into a lot of shit, hence the reason I was suspended and started teaching. You, my love, made me realize that chasing danger like I used to, is not gonna get me further in life. Now I have you, I have the love of my life here with me and I’m never ever gonna do anything that’ll put me or you or our child in danger.’

‘Then why did you punch him?’

‘Because he started it,’ Walter says, only for him to realize how toddler like that sounds. ‘I just want to protect you against anyone,’ he says in a softer tone. ‘Because I love you, Penelope Townsend. You are my everything.’ He wraps his arm around my upper body, pressing a kiss against my temple. ‘I’m sorry I scared you, Penny. I never meant to do such thing.’

‘I know,’ I whisper. ‘Sorry for overreacting.’

‘No, no, no, you’re not overreacting. Maybe I was.’ He pulls me closer to his own body and places his hand on my stomach. ‘Just know that I will forever protect you and the baby.’

I chuckle. ‘I know that. Promise me you won’t do anything stupid anymore, not when I’m around at least.’

He smiles. ‘I’ll tone it down a notch, princess.’

✎ ✎ ✎

‘Is that that colosseum thing you were talking about?’ Walter gestures towards my chest and I look down, spotting two tiny wet patches near my chest area, before bursting into laughter.

‘Colostrum, Walter, not colosseum.’ Oh dear, he is totally blushing, because of his mistake. ‘Can you grab me another shirt?’

I barely asked the question, when he jumps up and rushes upstairs. I rub my stomach a little bit, slightly scared at how much it expanded. I’m close to the end of my pregnancy, having reached thirty nine weeks yesterday. I wonder how it’ll ever go back to normal.

Walter comes down again and without me asking he changes my shirt. ‘Have I told you I loved you today?’

‘A few times.’ I give him a kiss and whisper: ‘I’m proud of you.’

He frowns. ‘Why are you proud of me? You’re the one growing an entire baby here.’ He carefully places his hands on the side of my stomach. ‘The least I can do is to make things as comfortable for you as possible.’

‘But you always do it without complaining,’ I say. ‘I heard that Stacey’s husband is such a pain in the ass. Always complaining, groaning about how much he has to do nowadays.’

Walter scoffs. ‘Well, pregnant or not, I’d like to worship you, make your life as easy as I possibly can.’ He gives me a kiss. ‘What can I do for you, darling?’

‘Sex,’ I say, before I curl my lips in. Oh gosh, never have I been so straight forward. My cheeks heat up. ‘No, please, forget what I said.’

‘Is my girl asking me for sex?’ Walter starts to laugh. ‘The day Penny Townsend asked me for sex has finally arrived.’

‘I’m sorry,’ I laugh nervously. ‘It’s just been awhile.’ Awhile equals three months. I hate how he sometimes initiates, but I simply shake my head. It’s a combination of a very low sex drive, not feeling pretty and being in pain nearly twenty four seven.

He leans forward and kisses me. ‘Want to go to the bedroom, princess or is the couch acceptable as well?’

‘We can stay here,’ I whisper.

‘Then let me close the curtains and lock the door, okay?’

‘Okay,’ I mumble.

When he comes back, he takes off his shirt, so I can admire his beautiful strong body. There is something so special about Walter. He looks strong enough to left a car up with one arm, but he is a mushy man the second the front door closes and we’re together. He kneels in front of me, pressing open mouth kisses on my lips. ‘Shit, I love you,’ he says against my mouth. He disregards my shirt and admires me.

‘Stop,’ I say, rolling my eyes.

‘No, no, no, I could never stop admiring you.’ He places his hands on my expanded stomach and says: ‘You’re so beautiful.’

He gives me a long kiss and then I whimper. Not out of pleasure, but out of shock.

‘What’s wrong?’ he asks me.

‘I think my water broke.’

✎ ✎ ✎

Twelve hours later, I am looking at Walter, who holds the little baby in his strong arms. He sits next to me on the bed and wraps one arm around my shoulders. ‘Penny, princess,’ he says, ‘I don’t think words can describe how proud I am of you and how much I love you.’

I nuzzle my face in his chest. ‘I love you too. Thank you for not freaking out.’

‘Externally freaking out you mean, because on the inside I was fainting,’ he chuckles. He gives me a kiss on my temple. ‘I’m a dad.’

I actually see some tears in his eyes and I cannot stop my own either. ‘I know.’ I place my hand on the little bundle and whisper: ‘We’re officially parents. It’s so surreal.’ I let out a deep and content sigh.

The little baby opens their eyes and I cannot stop my smile.

‘Hi, little one,’ Walter says. ‘Oh no, Penny, we’ve created an exact copy of yours.’

I chuckle. ‘Good luck saying no to him,’ I say. ‘We love you so much, Declan Marshall. So so much.’

[nerdzzone]

Once Bitten - Twice Shy

Summary: Raising a child is hard. Raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars is even harder. And raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars who you’re not actually in a relationship with is even harder still.

One of the challenges of sharing custody is sharing holidays which is something that Whitney Taylor found herself struggling with in the December of 2019. The prospect of spending Christmas without her son was dismaying, but the complications that come with the alternative might be even harder to face.

Chris Evans x OFC

Part One

----

Part Two

25.12.19

When I woke up in the morning, it took me a moment to figure out where I was and why the pillow my head was resting on was so hard and warm. Once I'd figured it out - that my head was not actually on a pillow, but on Chris' chest - I almost had to roll my eyes. Of course it was. Of course we'd ended up all cuddled together. Because life was just one big romantic comedy, right?

I sighed quietly, silently praying that Chris wasn't awake yet as I slowly slid myself away from him. He didn't stir until I was sitting on the edge of the bed so I was hopeful that he hadn't been aware of the position we were in.

"G'morning," he greeted me, rubbing his eyes as the sound of excited children echoed down the hallway. "What time is it?"

I quickly checked my phone on the nightstand before answering.

"Only seven o'clock," I told him before yawning. "But it sounds like everyone is up and bouncing off the walls already."

"I'm not surprised," Chris smiled. "They've probably torn into all the presents by now."

I laughed and nodded my head, knowing it was a good possibility.

"It probably wasn't super smart to leave Scott out there guarding them by himself," I pointed out. "Not after he spent half the night shaking his own presents trying to guess what was inside."

"Oh, it definitely wasn't," Chris agreed. "He was always the one who ruined things by finding his presents early and getting us all in trouble."

"Well, I should go see what they're up to or if anything can be salvaged," I smiled as I pulled a sweater on over my pyjamas. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be out in a minute," he assured me. I headed to the door, but stopped when I heard his voice again. "Hey, Whitney? Merry Christmas."

I smiled even wider as that happy, familiar Christmas morning feeling washed over me.

"Merry Christmas, Chris."

With that, I hurried out the door, trying not to focus too much on how content I felt and how right it seemed to wake up in his arms on Christmas morning.

-

When I got to the kitchen, I was surprised to see that everyone else was already awake, despite how early it was.

"Good morning," Lisa greeted me as I wandered into the kitchen where all the adults were congregating. "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, everyone," I smiled before they all repeated it back to me. "Did I miss all the fun?"

"No, of course not," Carly assured me. "We've managed to keep them away from the presents so far, but I'm not sure how much longer we can hold them off."

"We're still waiting for Chris though," Scott pointed out as I grabbed a clean mug and headed to the fresh pot of coffee on the counter. "Have you seen him? He disappeared not long after we went to bed and never came back."

"Oh, yeah, he's in his room," I answered mindlessly as I filled my mug. "We ended up sleeping together last night."

I heard Scott almost choke on his coffee and noticed the sudden silence in the room, but it wasn't until Lisa spoke that I realized what I'd said.

"Whitney, honey," she said, speaking softly. "What do you mean?"

"Oh my god, no! Not like that!" I rushed to explain as my cheeks grew hot. "We literally slept together, like as in slept next to each other. Chris came into his room looking for a sweater because he was cold and had given away all his spare blankets so I offered for him to share the bed with me. That's all, I swear."

There were knowing smiles amongst the group and I wasn't entirely sure that they all believed me which made things even more embarrassing as I wouldn't want them to think I'd talk so candidly about things like that with Chris' mother of all people. Before I had a chance to continue desperately defending myself though, a voice from the doorway interrupted.

"What are you swearing about?" He asked, leaning against the doorway. "Why do I feel like I missed something good?"

Again, I was ready to explain, but someone beat me to it.

"Whitney was just giving us the update," Scott informed his older brother as he matched his smirk. "She was telling us how you two slept together."

Chris' eyebrows knitted together in confusion for a moment before he relaxed and let out a chuckle.

"Well, that's not exactly how I would have phrased it," he informed the group with a shrug. "But I suppose it is accurate. We slept and we were together."

"I just misspoke," I groaned. "I haven't had any coffee yet, I wasn't thinking clearly."

"A little Freudian slip?" Carly suggested as she joined in on the teasing, but I simply rolled my eyes.

"Chris probably wishes that was a peak into my subconscious desires, but I'm afraid not. Just a clear sign that I am not a morning person."

"I think we'll all need plenty of coffee to deal with the energy in that living room," Lisa interjected, putting an end to the discussion despite Chris' protests of my claim. "But we should probably go and join them before they open all the presents, whether they belong to them or not."

We all murmured in agreement and everyone topped up whatever beverage they were drinking before we headed to the living room to start the Christmas fun.

-

"Mama!" Grayson shouted as we entered the room. "Look! Santa came!"

"Of course he did," I smiled at the children. "You've all been good this year so it's no surprise."

They all nodded and agreed enthusiastically except Ethan who, now that he was almost ten, had figured out the truth. He was a good kid though and a loving older brother so he kept the secret, quietly watching them with a knowing smile now that he was finally in on the joke with the adults.

"Can we open them?" Stella asked, bouncing up and down from holding in her excitement. "We've been waiting for so long!"

"I wouldn't say so long," Scott chuckled. "Since it's not even eight o'clock in the morning yet!"

"But, yes, you can open them," Carly informed her children. "Just be careful and don't rush."

There was a flurry of activity as the kids dove into the presents, organizing whose was whose before settling down next to their little piles. I took a step back and sat on the couch next to Lisa, letting Chris sit on the floor behind Grayson. It was his Christmas after all and it felt right that he should be the one helping him open presents. Plus, this way I got a perfect view of the joyful grin that was plastered on his face. A grin that was perfectly replicated by his father behind him making my heart clench at the sight of them together like this.

I watched from my spot on the couch as the gifts were opened one by one and soaked in every giggle and shriek of glee from the children. Grayson was on top of the world and so grateful for each and every gift, it was delightful to see. Given our financial security, especially for Chris, it would have been easy to spoil him, but it made me incredibly proud to see how gracious he was.

However, one of the last gifts he wasn't so grateful to receive. It was from me and I knew there was a chance it wouldn't be his favourite, but his response was far worse than I could have imagined.

It was a decent sized box and he tore off the wrapping paper eagerly, intrigued by what could be inside. When he revealed that it was a foot and a half tall electronic T-Rex, his first reaction was one of amazement.

"Wow! A dinosaur!"

"Yeah," I smiled. "Take him out and see what he can do."

Chris set to work helping Grayson open the box before glancing up at me.

"Does he need batteries?"

"I put some in already," I assured him. "I knew he'd want to see it right away so I thought it would be easier."

He nodded as Grayson placed the giant T-Rex on the floor and looked at me expectantly.

"There's a button on his back, press it."

Everyone watched as he poked around until he got the right spot and the dinosaur came to life. He roared and his head moved around, but as the older kids cheered and clapped, Grayson burst into tears.

"Oh, dear..." Lisa smiled as she watched her grandson leap into his father's arms.

Everyone was chuckling at his dramatic reaction as Grayson buried his face in Chris' neck.

"Awe, buddy, I'm sorry!" I apologized. "Did it scare you?"

"Yes! He's scary!" Grayson's response was muffled by Chris' body and hard to understand through his sobs. "I don't wike it, Mama!"

I smiled at the little speech impediment that he inherited from his father - much like the one his cousin, Miles, had - but I did feel bad for how genuinely afraid he was.

"I'm sorry, baby. We can take the batteries out, okay? Then he won't be able to move."

The dinosaur had stopped moving on his own before I spoke and Grayson moved his head from where he was hiding his face, nodding as he did so.

"Yes, please."

"I bought it a while ago, thinking it was the perfect gift and then last week, he suddenly decided that T-Rexes were mean and I thought it might not go down so well," I admitted to the adults as I stretched forward to pick up the dinosaur and take the batteries out. "It's such a shame though, I think he's adorable. If you press the button on his tail, a little song plays and he does a little wiggle dance."

Chris smirked at me as he rubbed our still sniffling son's back.

"Why don't you take him home? Sounds like you might enjoy playing with him when Grayson isn't around."

He was making fun of me, I knew he was, but I didn't take the bait.

"You know what? I might just do that."

Chris opened his mouth to most likely make another teasing comment, but Ethan interrupted him.

"If Grayson doesn't want the T-Rex, can I have it?"

"I think you got enough new toys this morning," Ethan's dad warned him. "Don't be greedy."

"We'll let Grayson keep him for now," Chris agreed. "He might get used to him after a while if he plays with him without the batteries."

I passed the toy in question back to Chris and Grayson cowered away, whimpering against his dad's chest.

"Just leave it for now," I suggested. "We can try it again later when the initial shock has worn off."

Chris nodded and put the dinosaur behind his back and out of sight.

-

The rest of the gift opening went by smoothly and no more children were traumatized. Once every gift that was under the tree had been opened, we left the kids to test out their new things while the adults headed to the kitchen to start making breakfast. It was quickly decided that pancakes would be the easiest thing to mass produce for our large group of hungry people and while Lisa, Carly and I started mixing up a few bowls of batter, Chris and Scott whipped out the orange juice and champagne for mimosas.

An hour later everyone was very full and we were two bottles of champagne down.

"So, Whitney," Scott started as he loaded up the dishwasher. "Are you staying here tonight too or are you planning on making us spend half the day shovelling the driveway for you?"

His tone was teasing, but as I looked out the window at the deep blanket of snow that covered the ground outside, I was torn. I didn't want to outstay my welcome by staying another night, but I also didn't want to make the Evans family spend their entire Christmas day shovelling snow and there was no way that I'd be able to do it by myself.

"I'm not sure," I admitted. "I wasn't planning on staying another night, but it does look like there's a lot of snow out there..."

"Just stay," Chris shrugged. "Even if we can get your car down the driveway, the roads are probably terrible."

"There's no need for you to rush off," Lisa agreed. "Stay another night and then you can just relax and enjoy the day."

"And you can drink if you're not driving home," Scott pointed out with a grin. "Chris and I stocked up on wine, beer, whiskey and gin, these mimosas were just the start of the party."

I couldn't help, but laugh at Scott's reasoning as I nodded my head.

"Alright, I'll stay. If you really don't mind, Chris?"

"Of course not," Chris assured me. "We're happy to have you."

"Great!" Scott grinned. "I'm glad that's settled, I think this calls for another round of drinks!"

Chris cheered and jumped up to help him while the rest of us smiled and shook our heads at their antics.

-

The day was spent soaking in quality family time, watching the kids enjoy their new toys and indulging in lots of food and drink. We called Chris' dad and my parents and even had an unexpected phone call from my Uncle Rob. He spent more time talking to Chris than me, his own niece, but it was nice to hear his voice even if he made sure to get a dig in about me confessing my supposedly obvious feelings to Chris.

Sitting around the table, eating a delicious meal with Chris' loving and welcoming family was quite a contrast to how I expected to spend the day and I was very grateful that Chris had included me. Grayson seemed to appreciate it too and he made his enjoyment clear as we tucked him into bed once all the fun and feasting was done.

Chris sat on the floor leaning against Grayson's nightstand, reading him his favourite bedtime story while I laid on the bed next to him and rubbed his back. He was drifting off by the time the story was finished, but he was fighting it desperately as he spoke again.

"I'm happy, Mama," he told us, his words muffled as he nuzzled into his pillow.

Chris put his hand over his heart as he mouthed an 'awe' at me and I smiled.

"You're happy?" I clarified quietly, my smile growing as he nodded. "I'm glad to hear that, baby."

"I like that you're here," he mumbled. "Daddy should come home with us too."

My heart clenched at that request as my smile faltered. I knew it was only a matter of time until Grayson paid more attention to the fact that his time was divided between two homes, but I wasn't ready to deal with it just yet.

"Maybe Daddy could come for a sleepover sometime," I suggested, stroking his hair back out of his face, but that wasn't all he wanted.

"He should come all the time."

I was never great at hiding my emotions and from the way Chris was watching me, I assumed my distress at Grayson's comments was written all over my face and I was grateful when he jumped into the conversation.

"But what about Dodger?"

Dodger's ears perked up from his spot at the end of the bed, but he settled again when he realized that Chris wasn't calling for him.

"He can come too," was Grayson's answer to that dilemma, but Chris had a response at the ready.

"C'mon, you think Dodger would have enough space in your Ma's apartment?" He asked. "He needs a big house like this to run around in!"

So then we could all just stay here would be the logical comeback to that, but it seemed our sleepy little guy was too tuckered out from the excitement to argue. He let out a little sigh of defeat, but said no more. We stayed quiet for a few minutes until his breathing shifted and he was soundly asleep.

Chris offered me his hand to help me climb over Grayson without waking him up and, after whispering a quiet request to Dodger to keep our boy safe, he led me out of the room.

"You okay?"

The question came as soon as Grayson's door was pulled to and we were in the hallway.

"Yeah, of course," I nodded, forcing a smile. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Chris shot me a look that clearly showed his disbelief.

"You looked pretty downhearted in there."

"I just worry," I shrugged. "I don't want our situation to upset him and I know he's going to notice it more as he gets older."

"He'll be fine," Chris assured me, reaching out to squeeze my shoulder comfortingly. "He's got so much love in his life, he won't even notice that his family is a little different."

I wasn't convinced. He was obviously already noticing or he wouldn't have questioned it only moments before. I didn't want to start such a delicate, potentially tense conversation at the end of such a happy day though so I forced a more convincing smile onto my face.

"You're right," I agreed. "But I wouldn't be a mom if I didn't worry."

"Well, there's no time for worryin' on Christmas!" Chris claimed, followed by a grin as he dragged me off towards the kitchen. "What can I get you? Another wine? Maybe some gin? I might have some tequila kickin' around here somewhere..."

"No! No tequila!" I laughed. "Gin would be great, thanks."

Chris nodded and set to work mixing our beverages for the evening before we went to the living room to rejoin his family and I did my best to push any worries about letting Grayson down out of my mind.

-

After the kids were all in bed, the rest of the evening was spent playing games and sharing drinks. It was heartwarming, wholesome family fun and I was so glad that Scott had encouraged me to stay as the thought of rushing home to my cold, empty apartment wasn't at all appealing.

The only strange thing about the evening was Chris. We were teamed up for most of the games and it was quite amazing how in tune with each other we were as we won everything by a landslide. We'd been friends for a long time and knew each other very well so it was unsurprising to me that we had so much success, but the teasing comments that came from a rather drunk Scott implied other reasons than friendship for our harmony. I scoffed and rolled my eyes every time he cracked a joke about us, but Chris seemed to love it. He was a few drinks in and probably just feeling a little goofy, but the grin on his face after every suggestive comment sparked an odd feeling in my stomach.

It was around ten o'clock when everyone except Chris, Scott and I decided to go to bed. We bid them goodnight and Chris went to top up our drinks before settling back onto the couch beside me. By this time, I was definitely feeling it. I wasn't drunk, but I knew this drink would have to be my last as the flush of my cheeks and the happy, fuzzy feeling in my brain was telling me that it was time to wind it down for the night.

However, as Chris handed me another gin and soda, settled on the couch next to me, placed his drink on the end table beside him and pulled my feet into his lap, my mind suddenly felt surprisingly sharp.

"What are you doing?" I asked, a giggle slipping from my lips.

"Releasing some tension."

As he answered, he began a slow massage of my left foot and I couldn't help, but smile at how wonderful it felt.

"Releasing?" Scott snorted a laugh. "Sure, a foot rub is known for getting rid of tension, not making it worse."

Chris smirked at what Scott was insinuating, but seemed unbothered by it.

"Don't be jealous," he teased, but now it was my turn to smirk.

"Of what?" I questioned. "This foot rub? It's not that great, Scott."

Scott laughed as Chris gasped a tad over dramatically.

"Not that great? I offer you a free foot rub and you can't even be fuckin' grateful?"

Chris shook his head, but the smile on his face told me that he wasn't really offended. He did stop massaging my feet though and I whined in protest as he picked up his drink.

"A mediocre foot rub is better than nothing," I pouted. "Keep going."

Chris sipped his whiskey, the smile on his face morphing back into a smirk as he shook his head again, but he did let his hand rest over my ankles and I was happy for even that tiny bit of contact.

Scott changed the subject to some viral video he saw the other day and Chris laughed and chatted along as he absentmindedly let his hand drift up my shin, underneath the loose pyjama pants that I'd changed into shortly after we put Grayson to bed.

My mind was instantly taken back to another time when we'd shared such gentle touches. A time when his lips followed his fingers as they traced kisses up from my ankle all the way to the lacy edge of my underwear. A time when he'd then proceeded to pull that underwear off with his teeth before returning his face back to a very sensitive area.

"Whitney, have you seen it?"

Scott's question snapped me out of my racy daydream. I felt my cheeks flush with colour as I forced my gaze away from Chris' hand over to Scott, reminding myself that even though the look on Chris' face would make it seem otherwise, he couldn't possibly know what I was just thinking of.

"Uh, no, I haven't," I admitted, sipping my drink to try to cool myself down even though it was becoming apparent to me that I needed to slow down my alcohol consumption. "All I seem to watch these days is Paw Patrol."

Chris barked out a laugh and nodded.

"So much Paw Patrol," he agreed. "The kid's obsessed."

"Chase is on the case!" I giggled before changing my voice slightly. "Rubble on the double!"

"Oh my god," Scott laughed, a horrified look on his face. "We need to get you out more."

I shrugged as Chris continued to trace patterns on my shins.

"That's the life of a mom."

"Yeah, but what about when he's with Chris? You must have some sort of life then."

"Scott."

Chris' voice was harsh and warning as what Scott was implying could be taken as offensive, but I wasn't bothered.

"It's fine," I assured him. "I know I'm lame. I don't have much of my own life, I don't really know anyone around here."

"You have Allison," Chris pointed out. "You've mentioned her a lot. She's your friend, right?"

He was referring to my one and only friend in Massachusetts. She was also a photographer and we'd met at a camera store when I first moved here. She'd asked me a question about a new brand of film and we'd ended up having coffee to exchange tips. She realized quickly that I didn't know many people in town and had taken me under her wing.

"She is," I nodded. "But she has three kids of her own and she's married so she doesn't have weeks where she's child free like I do. We hang out when we can, but usually it's with all the kids, not like quality 'girl time'."

"I didn't know that," Chris frowned. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't feel bad for me." I nudged him with my foot. "I have plenty of friends, they're just in LA. I'm happy here."

"I'll take you out for drinks one day," Scott promised. "Even if you're happy, everyone needs to let their hair down a little bit sometimes."

"That would be fun," I smiled, tossing back the last of my drink. "But for now, I think I've let my hair down enough for today. It's time for me to get to bed before all these drinks go to my head."

I slid my feet off of Chris' lap and slowly stood up as he looked up at me.

"Are you cool if I bunk with you again tonight?"

"Of course," I nodded. "Just sneak in quietly if you two stay up too late."

"I'm ready to crash already," Scott informed us. "So, we won't be up much later."

"Okay. Well, goodnight boys," I waved as I headed towards the door. "Thank you for a lovely day."

They chorused a goodnight back to me before I walked down the hall.

-

I was just coming out of the en suite in Chris' bedroom after brushing my teeth when Chris strolled into the room.

"Hey," I smiled. "Ready for bed already?"

"Scott wasn't lying," he returned my smile. "He was half asleep by the time you made it down the hall."

I laughed as I crawled into bed and settled against the pillows.

"Well, it has been a busy day."

Chris agreed as he grabbed his pyjama pants and headed to the bathroom. I picked up my phone from where I left it on the nightstand, turned off the lamp on my side of the bed and answered a few text messages from my family, figuring I may as well wait the few minutes it would take Chris to get ready for bed before I attempted to get any sleep. When Chris reappeared, I locked my phone again, put it back on the nightstand and snuggled down under the blankets, trying not to stare too much at his chiselled torso. He wasted no time turning off the lamp on his side as well before slipping in next to me, shivering dramatically as he pulled the blankets up over his chest.

"It's so freakin' cold tonight."

I snorted a laugh, shaking my head even though I knew he wouldn't be able to see me until our eyes adjusted to the dark.

"Maybe if you put on a shirt you wouldn't feel it so much."

"Honestly," Chris started, the smirk evident in his tone despite his face still being hidden in shadow. "Usually, I just sleep naked so these pants are for your benefit."

I felt my cheeks flush as the words 'then by all means, take them off' were on the tip of my tongue. I forced them out of my mind as a long forgotten tingle rolled through my body and I focused on answering him.

"My point was that a t-shirt would provide you with extra warmth," I explained. "So, your point that you usually wear less clothing makes no sense."

The bed shifted slightly as Chris chuckled.

"Well, I can think of another thing that could provide some extra warmth."

"What?"

I felt my heart rate pick up, the blood rushing through my ears so fast that I hardly heard myself answer him as I wondered if he could possibly be implying what it seemed like he was implying.

"You." His voice was low, the same seductive tone he'd used all those years ago, and I felt my mouth go dry. "Come give me a cuddle."

For a moment, I thought I was a lot drunker than I'd realized and that I was hallucinating or in some kind of lucid dream, but that thought brought me to a different realization.

"Chris!" I whispered, my tone scolding and accusatory. "You're drunk!"

A burst of laughter came from the other side of the bed and I quickly shushed him, knowing Grayson was asleep in the room above us.

"I'm not drunk, I promise," Chris assured me as his raucous laughter came under control. "I just thought it was worth a shot. It's nice to have a little cuddle with a beautiful woman sometimes."

I felt another flush of heat run through me, but I rolled my eyes and, as I had the night before, I took a pillow and placed it between us, drawing a clear line in the sand even if that hadn't worked out so well the last time.

"Goodnight, Chris."

"Goodnight, Whitney."

I rolled over, closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

I did try. I really, really did.

But after almost ten minutes of thoughts whirring through my head, I knew it was hopeless and I turned back to face Chris. Now that my eyes had adjusted to the dark, I could see well enough to know that he was laying on his back so I carefully moved the pillow that I'd placed between us and slowly slid over towards him. I felt him tense so I knew he was awake, but he didn't question what I was doing so I continued until my head was on his chest and my arm was draped over his stomach. He stayed perfectly still, just long enough for me to start second guessing myself before he shifted slightly to put his arm around me.

We stayed like that, holding each other in silence, and I had to admit that Chris was right. It was nice to have someone to cuddle with. The physical contact was filling a hole in my touch-starved heart and I tried not to think about how fleeting of a moment it was or how things would be back to normal in the light of day. There was a strange ache in my heart at that thought and I knew I needed to get out of my head.

"Chris?" My voice was soft, just in case he'd drifted off in the last few minutes, but when he tightened his grip on me, I knew he was still awake. "Thank you for inviting me today."

"Of course." He squeezed a little tighter. "I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner."

"It's fine," I assured him, letting my hand lazily trace patterns on his skin. "You're under no obligation, you're allowed your time with Grayson without me."

"It's not about obligation. I'd never want you to spend Christmas alone even if Grayson wasn't in the picture."

"I was really dreading it."

My admission made me feel vulnerable as I'd spent so long trying to pretend that I wasn't bothered by the idea of a lonely holiday, but Chris didn't seem surprised.

"Really?" He questioned, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "The crying onto your steering wheel didn't give that away at all."

"Shut up," I mumbled, turning my face into his chest to hide my smile at his teasing. "I'm just trying to express my gratitude for your kindness."

"No gratitude is needed. It's been my pleasure having you here today and Grayson loved it."

He kissed the top of my head after he'd finished speaking and almost reflexively, I found myself stretching up and placing a soft kiss of my own against his collarbone. It felt intimate and the moment hung heavy between us. It felt right to me, but I knew instantly that I'd crossed a line. A comforting kiss on the top of my head was one thing, but what I'd done, kissing his bare chest, was inappropriate. My cheeks burned as I tilted my head up to look at him, meeting his eyes as they looked down at me. His expression was unreadable so I opened my mouth to apologize only to be completely shocked when he pressed his head forward and his lips against mine.

The shock quickly morphed into a feeling that could only be described as euphoria. There was something distantly familiar about the way his mouth moved on mine, but it felt strange and new as it wasn't exactly as I'd remembered - and I had spent more time than I'd want to admit reliving the last time we'd shared a kiss like this.

It wasn't until he pressed his tongue against my lips, in an attempt to deepen the kiss, that I snapped out of my daze.

"Chris, wait," I breathed out as I pulled away and stared up at him, my cheeks now flushed much more from excitement than embarrassment. "We shouldn't do this."

"Says who?"

The little voice in my head telling me that I'm about to ruin everything that we've worked hard to create. The words were on the tip of my tongue, but as he smirked down at me and licked his lips as if he was preparing for what was to come, I found myself incapable of logic and reason.

"Doesn't matter."

Chris hardly had time to acknowledge my answer before I dove back in for another kiss, moving to a more comfortable position as I straddled his waist.

He completely overwhelmed my senses. The inescapable scent of him surrounding me, the feel of his strong body between my thighs and the soft little sighs of enjoyment that he kept making every time our lips parted for us to take a breath. None of it was doing anything to ease the ache that was growing between my legs and my hands gripped into the sheets where they rested just above his shoulders as I pulled back to look down at him. I needed to see his face to remind myself this was really happening and who it was really happening with as it still felt so unreal.

Chris smiled up at me, his lips looking plumper already, and let his hands settle on my hips to keep me steady.

"You okay?"

I nodded and leaned down to peck his lips again before answering.

"I've never been better."

Chris' smile only widened at that confirmation and he moved his hands down to cup my bum, pressing my hips forward and giving me a moment of friction that I'd been desperately craving. I pressed myself up, pulling my upper body away from him as a gasp fell from my lips and my eyes squeezed shut. I was embarrassingly aroused from a few mere minutes of kisses, but it had been a very long time since I'd had any physical contact with a man and my body was already on fire.

I rocked my hips against the toned muscles of his abdomen, soaking in the pleasure that was radiating through me and I was debating whether it would be rude of me to continue until I reached the release that was quickly building inside me. Clearly, Chris was just as intuitive as I remembered as he let out a groan and effortlessly flipped us over so he was on top.

"Not like that," he smirked. "I've been thinking about this for too long, it's not happening like that."

I felt another flush of embarrassment as he could obviously tell what I'd been thinking about doing, but I nodded in agreement.

"But if this is really happening, we need to be quiet," I reminded him. "Everyone's sleeping."

"They're all upstairs, they won't hear," he assured me. "And Scott's on the other side of the house."

He was right, we'd be fine as long as we kept ourselves under control, but it didn't matter anyway as all my doubts disappeared when his lips pressed against my neck. I let my hands slide around his waist, resting on his toned back while his lips continued their trail down my neck and stretched the neck line of my shirt to expose my shoulder. His lips locked onto one spot just above my collarbone, sucking and nipping until I was sure there would be a bruise there in the morning.

"Chris," I gasped out, digging my fingernails into his back. "Don't leave a mark."

He backed off a bit, kissing gently against the now sensitive skin.

"It'll be easy to hide," he assured me. "And if I remember correctly, you enjoyed a few bites here and there..."

He opened his mouth to dig his teeth into my shoulder and an image flashed into my mind. A memory of me, bent over with Chris' thumb on my clit as the two fingers he had inside me stroked a particularly delicate spot. He'd placed a soft kiss on the cheek of my bum before sinking his teeth into my skin, sending me over the edge.

I couldn't help, but moan from the combination of the memory and the sensation of his teeth in my shoulder as my hips pressed up against his. Chris seemed to be spurred on by that action as he ground his hips against mine and quickly let his hands slide down to the bottom of my shirt. He lifted it up and for a moment I was lost in the bliss of the sensations he was providing, but as my shirt was raised just past my belly button, I froze.

"Wait!"

My voice firm and demanding and he immediately responded, stopping his actions and looking up to meet my eyes.

"What's wrong?"

I bit my bottom lip as I pondered how to voice my concerns. If I didn't say anything, there was a chance that we could get through this without drawing any attention to it, but I couldn't help but think it was better to point it out than have Chris notice on his own.

"I just..." I breathed out, trying to figure out how to articulate my thoughts. "I just look different now."

"What?"

Chris pulled back even further, looking down at me with genuine confusion in his eyes and my cheeks burned as I tried to puzzle out how to explain my feelings in a way that didn't make me look shockingly insecure.

"Since I had Grayson, since the last time we did this," I clarified, my cheeks burning as I brought my flaws to his attention. "I look different. Like, I have stretch marks and my boobs aren't as perky as they used to be."

Even in the dark shadows of the room, I could see Chris' jaw clench as it did when he was annoyed and trying to bite his tongue. Panic flooded through me as I wished I'd kept my mouth shut, but his next words astounded me.

"Get outta here," he huffed. "You think I care about that?"

I dropped my gaze to the tattoos on his chest as I regretted ever opening my mouth.

"I don't know," I admitted. "Lots of men probably would."

Chris moved back, slowly sliding his body down, away from mine and I wanted to scream, I wanted to stop him and hold him against me as long as I could, but I was powerless to do anything, but watch. My heart sank, thinking he was going to roll off of me any minute now, but then he stopped. His face was level with my lower stomach and turned his eyes back towards my face.

"This body," he started, placing a kiss on my stomach. "This stomach, these stretch marks." He kissed the faint lines that were now barely visible on my skin despite how vibrant they were in my mind. Then he continued up, lifting my shirt as he went until it was resting above my breasts, my nipples hard from the chill in the air and the anticipation I was feeling. "These boobs." He kissed and nipped at the delicate skin, tracing all the way along until he captured a nipple in his mouth, teasing it briefly with his tongue. "They changed because you gave me my son, the greatest gift you could have given me. I have nothing, but gratitude for that and you're still the most fuckin' beautiful woman I've ever seen."

He was exaggerating. I knew he was exaggerating. He saw and worked with Hollywood's most elite actresses and models, there was no chance that I was even close to the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen. But he managed, again, to push all doubts from my mind as his lips set to work, this time focusing on my left nipple while he shifted his weight and freed a hand to stroke and pinch the right.

They were sensitive, they always had been, and the way that Chris was working them right now was almost too much. My head fell back and my hands dropped to the sheets as I tried to focus on enjoying the sensations and not immediately demanding for Chris to move lower, to give me more, to touch me where I wanted to be touched with increasing need. He was always paying attention though and before I even needed to voice my request, he let his mouth slip from my nipple and trail back down my stomach.

He nipped at the skin just above my pyjama pants before hooking his fingers in the waistband and pulling them down. I tugged my shirt over my head at the same time before laying back against the pillow, completely naked underneath him.

"Beautiful."

He'd muttered the word, almost more to himself than to me, but the sincerity in his voice flooded a new kind of warmth through my body. I tried to push it down, focusing on what we were doing, what this was and all it could be. Because yes, I loved Chris, but this wasn't that. This wasn't making love, this was a simple release of sexual tension. I didn't need my feelings getting in the way and making this complicated or I was going to get myself hurt.

I'd been so lost in my head that I hadn't noticed how my legs had fallen apart for Chris to settle between them or how he'd spread me with his fingers, opening me up for him to enjoy. It wasn't until I felt a slow, gentle lick right over my clit that I snapped back into the moment. With a gasp, my hips pressed up to meet his mouth, trying frantically to keep the friction now that it was finally there.

"Easy," Chris warned me, chuckling as he pulled back slightly, earning a whine from me. "We'll get you there, don't worry."

A feeling of desperation was building up inside of me and as he blew gently on the very sensitive parts of me that were in front of him, I was about ready to start begging.

"Please," I whimpered, moving my hand to his hair in case he got any bright ideas about pulling back any further, but I was relieved when he let out a groan and finally gave up on his teasing.

Suddenly I was aware of nothing, but Chris' mouth on me. My back arched as he licked up from the bottom of my core to the top, swirling his tongue around, exploring every little nook and cranny before settling his focus back on my clit. It was like he'd studied me, like he'd committed our previous brief encounter to memory and remembered exactly what I responded to as he licked and sucked with just the right amount of pressure and speed to have me panting as my grip tightened in his hair.

It had only been moments, but I could already feel the pressure building inside me, bubbling closer towards the surface. Chris, as if sensing this, eased off just slightly to slide his tongue a bit lower, pressing it against my entrance, dipping just barely inside, before replacing it with one of his fingers. I felt myself clench at the sensation, my body desperate for relief, desperate for something more inside me and Chris obliged, adding a second finger almost immediately.

"So wet, baby," he hummed, placing a kiss on the inside of my upper thigh.

I was too wrapped up in my own pleasure to formulate any kind of response, but Chris didn't bother waiting for one anyway before putting his lips back on my clit. The combination of his fingers and his mouth had me seeing stars and another whimpered plea slipped from my lips as he flicked his tongue against me. He was focused and determined, groaning against me after a particularly sharp tug on his hair when he angled his fingers inside me to find that one particular spot that made me see stars.

He stroked it once. Then twice. And on the third that coil that had been tightening inside me snapped. I covered my mouth with my free hand just in time to bite down and muffle the scream that Chris pulled from me as my hips thrust up towards him and I spasmed around his fingers as I fell over the edge.

Chris coaxed me through it, easing his attentions as I came down from the high I was feeling. He slid his fingers out of me, looking up to meet my eyes before licking them clean. I groaned, feeling myself twitch with arousal at the sight despite my heart still racing from the orgasm I had just had. He flashed me a smirk before crawling up my body and pressing his lips against mine again.

I sighed happily into the kiss, letting my hands slide down his back, just teasing the top of his pants as I reluctantly separated our mouths.

"Take these off."

My tone left little room for argument and Chris looked down at me with a smirk.

"Yes, ma'am."

He lifted his body off of mine just long enough for me to shiver from the loss of the warmth he was providing, but he quickly returned once his pants were discarded. He stayed slightly lower when he returned, turning his attention back to my chest, taking my left nipple in his mouth this time and using his hand to tease the other. My eyes fluttered shut at the sensation, but I fought the urge to simply lie back and let him do what he wanted with me. I wanted more, I needed more and I didn't want to wait any longer.

"Chris," I whined. "Please, fuck me."

Looking down, I could see his eyes widen in surprise at my blunt demand. He let his mouth slip off my nipple before giving it one last little nip, just hard enough to make me gasp from the slight twinge of pain.

"As you wish."

He reached down between us, taking a moment to slip his two fingers back inside me. He spread them out, gently stretching me and I was grateful. From my memory, Chris was thick and it had been approximately three years and five months since I last had sex (not that I was counting).

Once Chris was satisfied that I was adequately prepared, he pulled his fingers back and guided the tip of his cock towards my entrance. I tried to relax as he slowly stretched me open, but even as my mind revelled in the bliss I was feeling, a thought hit me that made my eyes widen and body stiffen.

"Chris!" I gasped out, gripping his shoulders to push him away slightly. "Condom!"

His head dropped down and he grunted as if he was using the last of his restraint to pull out of me.

"Shit," he cursed. "How could we forget that again?"

"I guess we don't learn from our mistakes," I smiled, despite the pang in my heart as the voice in my head chimed in again to say 'clearly not or you wouldn't be about to fuck him and break your own heart again'. "Do you have one?"

Chris nodded, rolling off me for just long enough to reach over to the bedside table. He pulled one out of the drawer, ripped it open and slid it on with impressive speed before crawling back over me.

"Now," he smirked. "Where were we?"

He looked down as he guided himself inside me again. The initial stretch wasn't as intense the second time around, but it grew as he pushed deeper and my breath hitched once he was fully inside. Chris stilled, sensing my discomfort as he dropped his head to kiss along my jaw until his lips rested just below my ear.

"You good?"

"Mhmm," I nodded, breathing out and shifting my hips as I started to adjust. We stayed like that, connected but still, for a few moments until I felt the tension ease a bit. "You can move."

"You sure?" Chris looked at me with concern on his face, but I nodded.

That was all the reassurance he needed as he began slowly moving his hips. He pulled his lips back from where they rested near my ear and pressed them against mine.

He kissed me deeply, passionately, as he created a steady rhythm, sliding in and out with his hips pressing hard against mine with each thrust. His biceps bulged and strained to support his weight through the movement and he eventually let his mouth fall away from mine as he could no longer hold back a groan. That noise, and the grunts that followed, made me twitch around him as if my body was doing everything it could to keep him inside me, to keep the pleasure that it had been craving for so long.

I could feel him dragging against every inch inside me, brushing against every nerve and stretching me just enough to keep me constantly impressed by how big he was. It was somehow too much, but not enough all at the same time and I hitched my leg higher up on his waist to help him get closer, deeper, if at all possible.

"Good girl..."

Chris' words hummed encouragingly against my collarbone where he placed another soft kiss before pulling back. He placed his hand on the back of my knee and lifted it even higher, opening me up for him even more.

My head dropped back against the pillow on the next stroke as his cock slid against that delicious spot inside me where his fingers had been only minutes before. He was watching, looking down between us to see me wrapped around him, see me taking him all the way every time he pushed in. I could hear him mumbling praises, compliments about how well I was doing, but I was too far gone, too wrapped up in the pleasure emanating from between my legs to do anything, but moan in response.

He slowed for a moment, leaning down, my leg catching on his shoulder and pressing it even higher as he reminded me to be quiet. He nipped my ear lobe, pulling a whimper from my lips before moving back and picking his pace up again. I knew he was right, but it was hard, next to impossible even, to hold back the noises that were bubbling in my throat.

I bit my lip and dug my nails into his skin as I attempted to control my volume and silently cursed Chris when he shifted his weight just enough to put the pressure of each thrust back on just the right spot. He moved his thumb down to brush over my clit, but it barely took a few strokes for me to fly over the edge.

It felt like my whole world exploded as I clenched around him, a low moan slipping past the lip between my teeth. The tingle ripped through every part of my body, every muscle quivering with pleasure, as Chris picked up the pace even more, with one final burst of speed until he stilled, letting out a deep, rumbling groan of his own before pumping in and out a few final times.

Once he'd stopped his movements completely, he let my leg lower to the bed, collapsing against my chest as he fought to catch his breath. I drifted my hand up to stroke the damp hairs on the back of his neck and soaked in the blissful feeling, a feeling I'd dreamt about since the last time I had the pleasure of enjoying it.

We stayed like that for a few moments until Chris reluctantly pulled back, letting out a soft groan as he slid out of me.

"I'll be right back."

I admired Chris' ability to walk already as all I had the strength to do was nod and shift back to my side of the bed. When Chris reappeared a few minutes later after disposing of the condom in the bathroom, I could barely keep my eyes open. He climbed back under the blankets and shifted over towards me until he could pull me right against his chest with our legs intertwined.

"That was nice," I sighed happily, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms as I nuzzled my nose into his toned pecs.

They shook as he chuckled and a giggle slipped from my lips as well.

"It was," he agreed, kissing the top of my head the same way he had at the start of this little rendezvous.

There was a heaviness in the air, the underlying unspoken words and the conversation that needed to be had hung between us, but I couldn't bring myself to ruin the moment. I'd spent so much time thinking about this, what it would be like to be in his arms again, I couldn't bare to say anything that might make him pull away and snap out of the moment of insanity we'd slipped into.

So, I didn't and neither did he. With one final, gentle kiss goodnight, we stayed tightly in our embrace until we drifted off into a contented sleep.

-

Part Three

[mermaidxatxheart]

Better Together Chapter Eight

Here's Chapter 8, y'all. My work is not to be posted on any other site. If you'd like to be added to my tag list, send me an ask.

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Word Count: 4.9k

Warnings: language, violence, descriptions of torture.

Series Master List

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

You climb down from the tower, trying to dry your eyes. You dust your hands off and head for the lab. You don’t want to study these stupid flowers, you just want to forget that whole stupid fucking planet. Your eyes won’t stop watering, your throat thick and painful as you try not to burst into tears again.

You round a corner, glancing behind you as you wipe your eyes again. The skin around them is starting to feel raw as you rub them endlessly. There’s something in the middle of the walkway that shouldn’t be there. You turn back to look at what you’ve walked into, stumbling back as fingers wrap around your shoulders.

“Y/N,” Poe breathes, eyes fluttering closed.

Oh, Maker. Your lower lip trembles as you look at his beautiful face, the rejection from earlier swirling up and stifling you. Your eyebrows pinch against your will, eyes starting to squint as the tears threaten to overtake you. Fighting for control, you struggle to smooth out your forehead, but no matter how hard you try, it won’t relax. You inhale sharply through your nose and his eyes fly open.

“Oh, sweetheart.” He mumbles, pulling you in for a hug. It hurts, feeling him care about you this way. You don’t hug him back, keeping your arms rigid by your sides. If you let yourself give in, it will only make things harder. “Y/N, I’m so sorry.” He whispers, burying his face in your neck. “I didn’t mean… this morning…” he takes a shuddering breath. “Please? Just… pl-please.” He hugs you tighter, his voice breaking.

“Poe,”

“Don’t you think I want… if I let myself ki-“ he cuts off audibly. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He whispers.

“What do you want from me?” You ask, but it comes out colder than you mean it to.

“Forgive me? You have to know I would do anything for you. Anything you ask of me.”

“You didn’t do anything that needs to be forgiven.” You say softly, your arms curling around his back, your willpower crumbling.

“In my room-“ he starts.

“I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have put you in that position.” You sigh, turning your face into his neck. “Moment of weakness. Will you forgive me?” You ask.

His soft lips press into your neck and you shiver at the unexpected touch. “Nothing to forgive.” He murmurs, lifting his head up to trail up your neck. Your heart thrums erratically in your chest as his lips brush your jawline. “Please tell me you haven’t been crying all day because I’m an asshole.”

“No.” You say, barely more than a whisper. It’s all you can manage as his lips trail up your cheek. “I finished my report for Leia.” You say and he tenses. “Poe? I know… I know I don’t deserve it, but can we talk about the river?” You ask quietly.

“I liked the river.” He mumbles against your cheek. You desperately want to turn your head, to catch his lips with yours. Maker, you feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster, high then low, upside down, then backwards.

“I meant what happened in the river.” You correct.

“Liked that, too.” That earns a weak chuckle.

“You shouldn’t have.” You mumble.

“Y/N,” he groans, guiding you against the wall. He brushes his thumb along your jaw. “What’s bothering you? Tell me. You have so much that you’re not saying and it just breaks my heart.”

Your holopad beeps and you close your eyes. “I have to get to the lab.” You twist your face away.

“I have literally nothing else to do. We can talk on the way.” He says, taking your hand.

“You don’t have to.” You look at him suspiciously. “Why send poor Snap to my room earlier?” You ask and he tips his head back, laughing.

“For funsies.”

“Pando? What the hell was that about?” You ask, his fingers intertwined with yours.

“Lando Calrissian. You mentioned he was an inspiration of yours to become a pilot. I figured you would get the reference. Poe, Lando, we’re both pilots.” He shrugs and you roll your eyes.

“I mentioned Calrissian once, five years ago. I can’t believe you remembered that.”

“I remember everything.” He promises. “How was your caf?” He hints.

“Better than the one Bryce brought me. Thank you. And for the food.” You add and he beams, lifting your hands to trace your cheek with the backs of his fingers.

“Of course.” He looks at you before facing straight and keeping his lips pressed together.

“You might as well say it. You have a terrible sabaacc face.” You sigh, pulling him into the lab.

“I don’t like him. He’s been dating you for three years and still doesn’t know how you like your caf. It’s not hard. He’s a jerk. And I hate that he kept me from the med bay so I couldn’t see you. I hate that he acts like he owns you.” He picks up your protective lab coat and helps you slide your arms in. You wince in pain but quickly compose your face so he won’t see.

“Anything else?” You look up at him.

“Only a million other things.” He sighs, leaning against your lab bench.

“Tell me.” You say, catching his hand.

He lifts your hand to his mouth, lips parting slightly as he flutters his eyes shut. He inhales deeply, lips moving silently against the back of it.

“Didn’t catch that.”

“This is so fucked up to say, but I’m so proud of you.” He says. “When we were taken, you were incredible. I never should have put you in that position, but you didn’t say anything, not to save me, not to save yourself and, Maker, I’m so fucking proud of you. I didn’t know if I was going to be able to hold out when he started hurting you, but the fact that you weren’t breaking gave me strength.” He bows his head, clinging to your hand. “And I hate the fact that you think we went through all that because of you. None of it, none, was your fault.” He sighs, lifting his eyes to your face. “In fact, if it wasn’t morally the exact wrong thing to do, I would kiss you again in a heartbeat. Over and over. But you’re a good person and that wouldn’t be fair to you.” He murmurs softly.

“Poe,” you plead. It’s all you want, to kiss him.

“I know. I shouldn’t want that. You’re not mine to want that with, but I just… it’s in my head now. How good you taste, how soft your lips are.” He squeezes his eyes shut, cutting off his words and you squeak. You try to get your hands free, you want them in his hair, holding him to you.

“Poe, please!” You struggle and he drops your hands, hurt written all over his face.

“Okay.” He turns to leave and you grab his arm, pulling him back. You cling to his face, pulling his lips against yours. His hands grip your waist and you exhale in a rush. A massive weight is lifted off your shoulders as you kiss him, hold him. His lips part under yours and you moan low in the back of your throat. He clings to you, crushing you against him like he can’t get close enough.

Maker, you could stay like this forever.

He backs you into the lab bench, fingers pressing into your hips and you rock into him, starving. The door hisses open and he jerks back, spinning around and walking away a few steps.

Nya walks around the corner and looks up to see you fiddling with your holopad. Having barely recovered your wits, you grabbed the first thing your hands landed on.

“Y/N.” She greets with a smile. It’s fake and you want to slap her, but you just tighten your grip on your holopad instead.

“Nya. What are you doing here?” You ask, trying for polite at least and failing horribly. Poe smirks at you over the shelf he’s studying.

“Looking for you, actually.” She says, heading over and you internally groan.

“What did I do?” You ask and she laughs lightly.

“Nothing yet.” She promises. “Your plants are in bin Cin17.” She says, handing over the packet she’s holding.

“Oh. Thanks.”

She smiles at you and turns to walk away. You glance at Poe and he shrugs, coming back over. “That was odd.” He comments.

“Odd? That’s literally the nicest she’s ever been to me.” You sigh, turning back to your bench.

“I wonder why.”

“Maybe she wants something? Maybe she saw my outright panic attack in the dining hall and is getting off on my suffering.” You sigh.

“Or. On a slightly less negative note. Maybe she missed you? Maybe she realized she’s in love with you and now she wants to make it right and have babies with you.” He says and by the end, you’re laughing much harder than you should be. You double over, grasping your knees, your entire midsection aching for various reasons.

“Fuck, you’re gonna make me rip my stitches.” You gasp.

“It wasn’t that funny.” He mumbles.

“Oh man, you’re a funny guy, Dameron.” You pant, standing up and wiping your forehead.

“Thanks.” He mutters dryly. “May I ask what, exactly, was so funny about that?”

“Nya. Liking me? She’s so into dick, it’s all she talks about sometimes. Everyone who has one is in her sights. Especially you, Commander. And then babies with me? Come on. Get serious.”

“Just her? Or anyone in general is unbelievable?” He asks, an odd, stiff texture to his voice.

“I dunno. Anyone? I never really thought I’d make a good mom.” You shrug, heading for the containers now that you’re back under control.

“Really? I do.” He says and your face heats.

“Moot point at the moment. Bryce doesn’t want kids.” You say and he groans.

“Just when I think…” he rubs his face. “I gotta go. I’ll see you later.” He mumbles, swiftly heading for the door.

“Wait, Poe!” You call, half turning.

Too late. He’s gone.

***

You’ve never been punched before. Training was always hand to hand, blocking blows or fighting with weapons. They don’t teach you how to take a punch, or five, or twenty.

It doesn’t hurt at first. The impacted spot on your cheek just goes numb. You can feel the cut on the inside from your teeth against the sensitive tissue, but it doesn’t hurt. Yet.

Then after a couple minutes, it turns into a white hot pain. Couple that with fists landing all over your body, and you’re in pain like you’ve never felt before. Tears spill over your cheeks as the fist lands against your nose, cracking your head back against your prison table. You can’t see, can’t feel your face. Your mouth fills with blood, coating your tongue and spilling down your chin as you gasp for air. You can feel your lips split in different places.

There isn’t a part of you that doesn’t hurt, but you hold onto Poe. He didn’t give them anything, so you can’t either. You can’t let him have suffered for nothing.

The trooper stops, rolling his shoulder. “Answer me. Where is your base?”

You spit the blood out of your mouth at his feet. “That all you got? I was just getting into it.” You say and he grumbles, turning to leave for the time being.

You close your aching eyes and drop your head against the support. It’s not comfortable by any stretch of the word, but it’s better than having to hold your head up anymore.

The image from your nightmare flashes in front of your eyes, Poe fighting the invisible enemy, only now it’s not so invisible. A StormTrooper is wielding the blade, plunging it deep into Poe’s heart.

You jerk upright in your bed, upsetting your holopad and sending it crashing to the floor. You flip on the light, unnerved and feeling like you're not alone in your room. But there doesn’t seem to be anything there. Just your clothes on the floor.

You push yourself to your feet, not feeling safe here, and grab your blanket, wrapping it around your shoulders. You want to go see Poe, make sure he’s okay, be positive your nightmares haven’t gotten him yet.

But he doesn’t want to see you. Having avoided you for the rest of the day, you get the hint. A moment of weakness. That’s what that kiss was. You were there and he needed someone. Could have been Nya, probably for all he would have minded. Any port in the storm.

So, you bypass his room and head for the tower where you ate your lunch. It’s quiet, dark, you can see anything coming for you. You climb the steps slowly, feeling the familiar pinch of your stitches. They’re still ugly, crude, jagged. Maybe it’s good that Poe doesn’t really want you. No one could possibly love the new mutilated you. Bryce hasn’t seen them yet, either. You’re positive that the second he does, he’ll run for the hills.

Maker, you’re selfish.

You push open the door and a body in the tower makes you freeze. “Oh.” You mumble, realizing it’s Poe. “Sorry. I’ll leave.” You rush, ducking back down.

“Stay.” He croaks and you hesitate. “I can’t sleep. Stay and talk to me?”

“You sure you want me to?” You ask.

“I’d rather it be you than anyone else.” He admits.

You feel like leaves on the wind as you climb the rest of the way up. Swirling around in chaotic confusion. You don’t know which way is up, what to trust. You sit a little ways away, back against the wall, facing him.

“What do you want me to talk about?” You ask finally.

He drags a stick through the dirt, making scratch drawings. “I told you some stuff earlier. Spilled some of my guts. Anything you wanna tell me?” He asks finally.

“Yes.” You answer. It’s harder than you think to get these words out. “I…” you close your mouth, thinking about where to start.

“Not easy. To spill your secrets.” He muses. The pale moonlight ghosts across his face. He looks terrible. Tired, hurt, miserable.

“Anything you wanna ask me?” You prompt. “Maybe I can say it that way.”

He looks at you warily. “Will you tell me the truth?”

“Always.” You answer immediately.

“Why did you kiss me in the river?” He asks. “I’ve been thinking over it on a loop and I just can’t figure it out.”

“It felt… right. I needed to do it. I wanted to do it. You’ve always been the best person in the world to me, always taking care of me and looking out for me. And on that planet, I was losing my fucking m-mind, seeing things, hearing things. You were so patient, so kind, so… you. And I could feel tension. Not in a bad way, but pulling me towards you. I’m so sorry, Poe. I know you said I didn’t do it, but I can’t shake the feeling that if I hadn’t, if I hadn’t distracted you, you would have heard those troopers coming. You’ve never been so compromised on a mission before until you go on one with me. I fucked up so bad and I’ll never be able to forgive myself for hurting you like that.” You ramble, the dam broken and the words spill out everywhere. He doesn’t move in the shadows.

He doesn’t say anything for a long time. Your ears start to ring in the dead silence before he speaks again. “So, why kiss me in the lab?”

You sniffle quietly. “You admitted you wanted to do it again, and it’s been one of the dominating thoughts in my head since you saved me in that closet. I want to kiss you. And I like kissing you, but… the guilt… it just keeps reminding me that I’m hurting everyone. Every time I kiss you, I hurt Bryce. Every time I mention him, I hurt you. I can’t get it right. I’m turning into a plague.” You press your lips together.

“You had a nightmare in the cave. What was it?” He asks. You’re not even sure if he’s actually listening to your words, he gives no indication of hearing them.

“I,” you pause, having to think back that far. “I was hovering over myself as I slept. You were saying something but I couldn’t really hear it. Then I went outside, but it was into a First Order ship. And then I saw the tables we were attached to. And then two men fighting with lightsabers. And then…” you cut off, swallowing thickly. This part you remember, even though you wish you could forget it. “A-and then you. Y-you were fighting something I c-couldn’t see. It had a bl-blade and it killed you, stabbed you th-through the heart.” You say, gasping for breath. It feels like the surrounding air is crushing you. “I w-woke up and you weren’t there, I pa-panicked.” You twist your fingers into your blanket, hiding your face.

“Do you want to kiss me again?” He asks finally.

“Poe,”

“Do you? If you say no, I’ll never bring it up again.” He promises.

“Of course, I do. But it’s not that easy. I keep hurting you. I don’t know how not to. And being around you, it makes me happy, it makes it easier to breathe. I don’t wanna lose you. I couldn’t survive it.” You admit shamelessly.

“You won’t lose me. I won’t leave you.” He says. “One more thing.” He starts.

“Okay?”

“Do you hate the way dickhead doesn’t know how you like your caf?” He asks and you crack a tearful smile.

“Yes. It’s not hard.” You mumble.

“Come here.” He holds out his arms. “Come sit with me.”

You scoot over, resting your head on his shoulder as he spreads your blanket out over the both of you.

“I need you, too, you know. I can’t lose you, either. And if that means I have to kick Bryce from here to Tatooine, I will.” He says, nuzzling into your hair.

“Please don’t. You’ve been hurt enough on my account.” You close your eyes to him stroking your hair.

“No promises, sweetheart.” He's quiet for so long, you nearly fall asleep. “But I’m not gonna stop kissing you.” He murmurs against your hair.

With one last conscious thought, you dig into your pocket, reaching for his hand with your other one. Sleep is making your limbs like lead, heavy and clumsy. You feel him chuckle a little, placing his wrist in your fumbling palm. You place the chain in his hand, curling his fingers around it.

“Meant to give it to you earlier,” you mumble, almost certain you formed actual words.

“Y/N, ” he chokes, squeezing you tight. “Thank you.”

***

“You have to eat something.” He protests, guiding you down off the ladder. His chain is back around his neck, shimmering against his tan skin as it always has. Some day, he's going to give it to someone; someone he wants to spend the rest of forever with. Someone who isn't broken like you. Someone who actually deserves him. And you'll try to be happy for him, but you know it'll break your heart.

“Can’t you just… go get it for me?” You ask, feeling your hands start to shake at the thought of the crowd.

He smiles softly, brushing your hair back. “Sweetheart. No.”

“Poe…” you start and he cups your face.

“I won’t let anything happen to you, okay? I’ll be right there the whole time.” He promises. “But you have to eat. You need your friends. They miss you.” He looks around, noting the empty pathway. “If you need to leave, we’ll leave. Just say the word.” He presses a kiss to your forehead.

“It’s gonna be loud.” You protest as he takes your hand and leads you towards the commissary and dining hall.

“This early?” He scoffs. He pulls you along gently. You could stop him, you could let the tears free that have been simmering just under the surface since you got back. You know he wouldn’t push you to do it if you’re not ready.

But… he’s gone in there, he’s seen his friends. If he can do it, you can, too. You take an extra step, falling in next to him instead of being pulled by him and he smiles down at you proudly.

“There’s my girl.” He says softly. He holds your hand right up until you stop outside the doors. He lifts your hand to his mouth softly, eyes never leaving your face. “I’ll be right next to you.” He promises. You nod and he lowers your hand, reluctantly letting it go until not even your fingertips are touching.

He pulls open the door and lets you walk inside first. He doesn’t shove you in, instead, he waits for you to take a deep breath, smiling down at you until you straighten with a false sense of confidence, and step inside. He follows you, just barely touching your arm as he guides you to the line of food.

Despite his assurances that the room would be mostly empty, with shift changes and missions leaving early, the room is fairly crowded. You can feel his eyes on you, along with about a hundred others, but you feel better today. Stronger, even. You can do this.

You hope.

Poe picks up two trays and starts to put food on both, watching your face for positive or negative signs. You could do this yourself, you’re perfectly capable, but you like him waiting on you a little bit. Just this one time, let him dote on you.

He finds an empty table, just the two of you and he sits across from you, foot tapping against yours. They trickle over, slowly, one at a time. Your friends come to sit next to you. But this time, they don’t swarm you. They sit next to you, or next to Poe, talking to him about something trivial and you’re so grateful. It lets you get used to it again, being around people, acting human again.

You watch Poe, listening to him joke with Snap; Beaumont sets an apple on your tray as he tells Poe some gossip. And Poe sits there, listening and laughing to all of it. He interacts, partakes, and never once does he look uncomfortable or like he wants to bolt. You don’t know how he does it.

And then Lieutenant Connix walks behind him. She leans down to say something in his ear, her hand squeezing his shoulder as she talks. His hand lifts to cover her own as he twists his face to listen. After a second, he nods and she walks away.

You’ve always liked her, she’s friendly, smart, ambitious. But maybe you need to rethink your ideas. She walks quickly, her hips swaying, and you huff under your breath. Since when are she and Poe so close?

You try to listen, to distract yourself, but you can’t tear your eyes away from where the pretty girl disappeared through. Poe’s foot taps against yours and you flinch, looking up at him slowly. He smiles softly, his eyes falling to your ignored food.

You roll your eyes, picking apart your roll and taking small nibbles. After a couple minutes, Connix is forgotten as Beaumont regales the table with a story of how he got trapped in a wedding dress on Coruscant.

Soon, you’re laughing along with them. You forgot what this feels like, your face hurts from smiling so much. Poe’s beautiful eyes are on you, his own grin infectious.

A crack echoes across the big room and you jump, hands grabbing the table, ready to run. Your heart pounds in your ears and it’s like your vision completely leaves you. Snap’s hand settles on yours closest to him as he shouts something. Your brain slowly fades back in and you realize Poe has your other hand across the table and Beaumont is out of his chair, peering across the room.

Two mechs collided, neither paying attention to what was in front of them, their trays falling to the cement. That was the cracking noise.

Poe’s hand is shaking just slightly, hardly noticeable, as it covers yours, but you feel it. You twist your hand into his and he glances over at you. You smile softly, tracing your thumb over the back of his hand.

Beau sits back down next to you, his eyes searching your face for a minute before he grins. “Never boring, eh, Y/N?” He asks, his hand resting on your shoulder.

“I guess not.” You answer. You pull your hands back and pick up the apple. Poe is quicker than you thought possible, his favorite knife out and the handle pressed into your palm before you can even realize you need one.

You cut the apple in half, core out the middle on both halves and give the other half to your best friend. He’s abnormally quiet for a minute as he chews, and you wonder if maybe he’s not as okay as you thought.

“Wexley, what’s on the agenda today?” You ask Snap, half turning to face him, giving Poe time to recover.

“Well, I have a mission the day after tomorrow. So, I need to get my ship ready. There’s a part that’s being problematic. I have some mechs that are gonna look at it today and see if they can fix it.” He sighs.

“Well, if they have any problems, you can always come find me and see if I can help.” You offer and he grins.

“I just might do that.”

Once Poe is sure you’ve eaten all you possibly can without getting sick, he collects your trays and you join him to deposit them before leaving the room with a wave to your friends.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” He asks and you slip your hand into his.

“Thank you for making me go.” You say, leaning into his shoulder.

“Of course.” He smiles. “And… thank you.” He sighs, scratching at the back of his neck with his free hand. You cast your mind around, trying to figure out what he could possibly be thanking you for.

“I didn’t do anything.” You frown.

“With that stupid tray… you… fuck. How are you always so strong exactly when I need you to be?”

“Poe, I was ready to bolt. The only thing stopping me was you and Snap.” You tell him. “If you hadn’t grabbed my hand to keep me there, all you would have seen was my dust as I hightailed it out of there.”

He smiles softly, but it’s weak, a little broken. “I didn’t grab your hand to keep you there. I grabbed it to keep me there.” He admits, pausing outside the door to the lab.

You stare up at him, realization dawning much too slowly. “Poe,” you place a hand on his cheek and he leans into it, eyes fluttering closed. “Anything I can do, anything you need-I’ll always be here. You’re not alone.” You whisper and he pulls you close, kissing you softly.

Every time feels like the first time. His lips press against yours like they’ve known each other forever, no hesitation. He tips your head back, towering over you as you hold onto his shirt. His tongue is soft on yours, not domineering and controlling the way… someone else’s is… your subconscious blanks on the name, but it doesn’t matter, not when Poe is kissing you like his very life depends on it. No, like your life depends on it.

He pulls away, breathing slightly faster, forehead pressed to yours. His eyes are closed, but yours are open, drinking in every detail of his beautiful face. “Me and you, kid.” He agrees and you punch his arm, a smile already pulling at your lips. His eyes fly open and he rubs his arm.

“We’re the same age.” You glower and he laughs.

“I know. But you’re so much shorter.” He puts his hand on top of your head and you slap it away, turning towards the door with a huff. You’re about to swipe your keycard, but he pulls you back, plucking it out of your pocket. He swipes it and pushes the door open, letting you step in first.

“Will you stay?” You ask, reaching for your log books.

“Yeah. I don’t have anything else to do. I’m still technically on leave, recovering from…” he trails off, but you get the picture.

“Alright.” You start checking off your supplies and notes while he moves around your lab. You don’t pay him much attention, there isn’t much trouble he can get into. But you feel better having him around.

He looks through every box on the supply shelves, every glass container. You look over at him, catching his eye being magnified through a specimen jar. He looks so ridiculous that you can’t help but snort at him. He grins and straightens up, coming over next to you.

“Didn’t find anything you liked?” You tease, flipping through the last of your notes.

“Oh, I found plenty I like. Just nothing I can take right now.” He sighs wistfully. Your face heats, so you keep your gaze directly away from him. He chuckles and sits in the spinning chair next to your bench.

Chapter Nine

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[blackbat05]

Day by Day

Shangqi x Reader 

A/N: My love for this man has hit an all time high so let me capitalize on it while I still can! If you read everything, I sincerely thank you for doing so!!! And holy cow 2 fics in 2 days have I gone back into my prime days? 

Genre: PG-13

Notes: As the title mentioned, I’ll probably set it some time after endgame. You could see it as a prequel to my first post! Reader is a social worker and she’s just dealing with all the mess that the snap bought back. The reader’s name as Jen Lee. I also apologize in advance for the potentially long fic. 

***

‘Excuse me, I’m looking for my child? Her name’s Wang Yiman and she’s seven.’ Another frazzled-looking parent fought her way to the front of the receptionist, approaching the helpless intern who looked like she was going to be on the verge of tears if another request came in. 

‘I got this,’ a hand calmly reassured the young intern as she beckoned the relief parent. ‘Mrs Wang? My name is Jen Lee and I’m the social worker here.’ I offered my hand for the anxious mother. ‘Oh thank god! Is Yiman ok? She must have been so scared!’ I slowed to a stop outside the room at the end of the corridor, gently sitting her down. 

‘Yiman has been a very brave girl Mrs Wang, but I will not lie to you. The sudden disappearance of their parents has traumatized a lot of kids. We’ve managed to explain to them what was going on but they will need a lot of support.’ I gave a glance over Mrs Wang’s shoulder, nodding to my colleague, Tammy who was holding the hand of a little girl in pigtails and a floral dress. 

妈妈! mā ma (mommy!)

The young girl ran into her mother’s open arms, allowing the floodgates to open from both ends. I turn to Tammy as we shared a silent agreement to leave the area. ‘That’s the last one for the day,’ Tammy unceremoniously plops herself onto the chair, letting out a groan. ‘Thanks for your hard work Jen.’ 

‘Right back at you.’ I entered the last bit of paperwork before uploading Yiman’s case file onto the portal. Yiman’s reunion with her parents meant the Children and Youth Centre were halfway in getting every displaced child back to their parents. Looking at the dingy television that was hung on the walls at the waiting room, despite not being able to hear anything, it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on. S.W.O.R.D was apparently in a stand-off against Wanda Maximoff? Reported rumors that Sam Wilson didn’t want anything to do with the shield? It’s been a crazy few weeks but that was utter- 

‘Bullshit! If anything it’s the government. They must have psyched him into giving up the shield.’ My chair swiveled to face Tammy who returned a nonchalant shrug. ‘What? You know I’m right. Doesn’t matter if half the world’s gone or our universe gets split into two - they’re the true evil here. I’m still struggling to find a place after I found a couple making out in my apartment! And you know what the global repatriation council told me? We’re only dealing with urgent cases right now. Well I say f-’

The incessant ringing of the bell interrupted our conversation, replacing Tammy’s tirade into a cheeky grin. ‘Look who’s here!’ 

Shangqi stands behind the counter, dressed in his usual red varsity jacket and jeans, holding bags of what I could only make out as takeout from the Chinese restaurant that was run by a friendly Singaporean couple. ‘Did I interrupt something?’ He scratches his head nervously. ‘Nope, in fact you just saved me from Tammy’s monologue, any further and she’ll explicitly tell me what she saw in her apartment when she got dusted back that day,’ I shivered in mock fear. ‘Still haunts me up till today.’ Tammy meets us by the door, bag in her hand. 

‘I thought you were staying? We got fried dumplings and 泡饭  pào fàn (poached rice).’ 

‘Last minute duty - A parent called, gotta run! Enjoy your dinner date.’ She waggles her eyebrows suggestively, much to our embarrassment. ‘What? It’s not...’ Shangqi stutters, trying to form intelligible sentences. ‘Get out before I throw a fried dumpling at your face Tammy!’ She winks at me, before darting out of the door. Once my nosy colleague was out, I turn towards a red-faced Shangqi. ‘I’m so sorry... just don’t mind her.’ 

‘Huh?’ The man was knocked out of his stupor. ‘Oh yeah... sure,’ in an attempt to forget everything that had just happened, he opened the packets of fried dumplings. ‘Ready for war?’ 

‘I was born ready.’ 

Thirty-five minutes later, all that was left were the remnants of fried dumplings and three empty containers. 

‘This should be illegal,’ I patted my stomach in satisfaction to his amusement. ‘Laugh at yourself! You lost track of how many dumplings you had and ended up taking my share!’ 

Raising his hands in defeat, Shangqi starts to clear the table up. ‘So how’s the center? Everything alright?’ I nodded numbly. 

The past five years had been a blur. Hazy, even. All I remembered was a kid running into the office telling me that half of the staff disappeared during a school holiday program that we were running with a dozen other kids. Parents who survived the snap rushed to our center, demanding to see their children. We couldn’t give them any answer as we too, were equally perplexed. Maybe the only thing that made sense was Shangqi and Katy bursting into the center to help us with the chaos. 

Coming back from what could be the 1000th phone call, I got a glimpse in the children’s playroom where the five years old kids were at, treating myself to an amusing sight. They all had red cloths draped around their neck, each holding a stick that was from the abandoned prop box. Katy wasn’t spared to as she was wearing her own red cloth that seemed a few sizes to small for her. Not that she didn’t seem to mind. 

‘Alright my warriors! Chargeeeeee!!!!!!’ 

In unison, little pairs of feet pattered across the room towards their ‘enemy’, a cardboard cutout of a monstrous creature who was really just Shangqi in disguise. 

‘RAWR! I’ll eat anyone who stands in my way!’ He stands up, mimicking a dinosaur that was about to trample an entire city. I decided that the paperwork could wait, standing near the door to watch an Oscar-worthy performance. With great effort and bravery from the kids, they finally managed to take down 5 foot 10 worth of muscle. 

‘Again! Again!’ 

I chuckled upon seeing Shangqi on the floor, about to drift off into wonderland. It was time for me to step in. ‘Alright kids that’s enough for today! Dinner’s here.’  As the kids dispersed with the help of Katy, it was just the two of us left to clear up the mess. ‘Thank you so much, both of you. I honestly can’t think of what would happen if you guys didn’t come to help.’ 

Perhaps my body language was screaming ‘I’m dead tired, please just knock me out’ as Shangqi takes a cloth from me, folding it back into the box. ‘It’s what we would have done, this place, it means a lot to us - to me.’ 

A small knock on the door diverts our attention away from the trash. Little Yiman stands at the door, as she stares at the both of us with big round eyes. 

‘Yiman, it’s late, what are you doing here?’ I squat down to her eye level. The little girl beams, ‘ 妈妈 said that I could give this to you!’ She passes me a juice box together with a handmade card with colorful scribbles. Maybe I was carrying too much on my shoulders, as I suddenly felt a boulder lifted off me. ‘Thank you,’ I smile at her sweetly, ‘I love apple juice.’ Happy with the response, she runs to Shangqi. ‘Shangqi 哥哥 gē ge (brother)!’ 

He breaks out into a smile, opening his arms wide. Yiman nuzzles her head into his shoulder before breaking out into uncontrollable giggles from his sudden attack of tickles. ‘Are you hear to help Miss Jen?’ I took the trash from his hands, giving him some time with the girl. 

‘Yes I am. Miss Jen needs some help so I’m here today!’ 

‘Are you her boyfriend?’ 

Shangqi freezes on the spot. He had undergone what could be the toughest training by his father, fought the greatest assassins in the world and here he was - stumped by a question from a seven year old. ‘Well... I’m her close friend since when we were very young,’ Yiman looks at him expectantly. ‘She helped me when I was in trouble so I had to be a good friend when she was in trouble too.’ 

‘Like how Ningning helped me when I injured my knee?’ 

‘Yeah... something like that.’ He breathes a sigh of relief, thankful to escape his first crisis. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure if he was telling himself the truth. 

‘Yiman! Your mother’s here!’ The little girl gives him one last hug before running to the waiting room. Shangqi takes a moment to recollect himself. ‘Here I am thinking that you finally managed to have some stamina while interacting with young children, maybe I was wrong.’ I teased as I sat beside him. 

‘Har har, hilarious.’ He tosses me a straw for our peach teas, as we were greeted by the amazing night view of San Francisco. ‘Enough about me, you good though?’ Looks like he didn’t forget the conversation that was cut off earlier. My mind goes back to a few minutes earlier, eavesdropping on the conversation.

‘I had to be a good friend when she was in trouble too.’

Life has been so unpredictable, I don’t even want to think too far into the future. With appearances from more superpowered beings, I don’t know what’s real anymore.

‘Yeah. To be honest, it’s been so crazy and overwhelming but I’ll get through it. I have you don’t I?’ Giving him a wink, I slowly sipped on the sweetness of the tea, savoring the pearls. He pauses for a moment, nodding thoughtfully. 

Life isn’t the same as it was before. But maybe, just maybe... if I had Shangqi, I’ll take each day on one at a time. Day by day. 

[END]

A/N: Hoho! I literally spent the whole afternoon writing because I just had to get this idea out and also because work was pretty slow today. I have no idea what is up with my first two fics hinting at unrequited love? I guess I got inspired by Shangqi’s and Katy’s platonic relationship because I thought it was so well written but I also love Shangqi so I guess is a compromise kinda thing. Again, do like and comment if you wish! Really thankful that y’all have been so kind to me so far! 

Perhaps I’ll try my hand at shorter ones like headcannons before this girl exhausts herself out and I don’t want to do that because I believe I have more to show! 

[crowning-art]

TGCF SPOILERS

-----------------------------

ok hold up

PAUSE FOR A MINUTEE

How the hECk do people ship Shi Qingxuan and Ming Yi??? Am I missing smt??? like I don't know how someone could care or love someone who did all....that! (Waves hand vaguely)

I genuinely don't think anything can rectify that mess, so I'm veryyyy curious to see what those people who DO ship them see? Like if it's a personal preferance then ya cool lol. You do you. Tragically doomed lovers is cool. BUT like if it's smt else, IM veRY curious (plz don't tell me if it is smt else)

Also where does beefleaf come from? is that smt that also flew over my head lol??

I'm literally so hurt by the previous events like all the reminders of the poorly attended funeral, vacant spots... it hurts...

As they say, once a man falls, all will tread on him.

Please just let their story be concluded and kill Shi Qingxuan T-T

Please....I really want this pain to end.

OK Guzi is BABY, he's so tinnyyyy

Yet Guzi still chased after him relentlessly with his two small legs. Seeing that the distance between them had grown bigger, he burst out in tears.

“Dad! Please don’t throw me away. Dad, take me with you!”

HOLY OMG oqjbfoqfbo could the person who caused XIe Lian to get dragged into banyue and now the water demon mess...COULD IT BE MR. WHITE CLOTHED CALAMITY??????

I MISSED THEM

The one who responded was Feng Xin. For some reason, when Xie Lian saw him, he couldn’t help but feel an incredible sense of friendliness. However, one of Feng Xin’s eyes was purple;

Xie Lian couldn’t help but glance over to Mu Qing, who was standing far away on the other side of the hall. Mu Qing’s cheek was swollen. It seemed after building their grudge for so many years, the brawl the last time must’ve been aggressive.

They made made me feel a little happier...key word is LITTLE, like I'm genuinely still not over everything else ugghhh

AAAHhhh why are finally getting to whatever the heck is gonna go down with Qi Ying! (From experince, I don't think it's gonna be flowers or sunshine, sighhhhh better brace myself for whatever is gonna happen now)

ALSO OMGG MT. TONG'LU,,, WHAT IF WIND MASTER BECOMES THE NEXT SUPREME??? AM I STRETCHING??? HAS MY DENIAL GOTTEN THE BEST OF ME??? Or it could be Qi Rong?

Wait

wait

wait

WAITT

Qi Rong? Qi Ying??? could they be....

is it gonna be their story arc now??

No way. Qi Rong. Qi Ying. Qi...

I dunno

I think I'm losing my head

[downywrites]

Hello, bird is getting to everyone’s requests. Please hang on, your items will be delivered asap.

Enjoy this little drabble, beans! Love you all! /p

Ranboo(Lethe)  gets a back massage from Nikki(Nemesis).

Nikki was very used to helping people when they needed it, regardless of whether or not they asked for her help or not. The smiles that lit up their face made the toil worth it, no matter how small or fleeting that smile was. She loved the feeling of love. Soft, warm, fluffy like the soft curves of her famous loaves of sweet bread. .But love was fleeting. Change was imminent. Soon, her soft, warm bread went from something akin to a gift to the people to something the people expected of her. The love she so desperately seeked drained from the place. She felt lonely in the crowd, a source of love that seemed to be infinite to the people who so desperately craved it. Soon, her love ran dry. She wasted away, feeling less and less whole every day. She lashed out, hurt people she didn’t want to hurt, made people cry when all she wanted was to make people’s tears run dry. All she ever wanted was love, full, mutual, trusting love. But there was none where she searched. All of her ventures left her beaten and broken, forcing her to return to the land where bombs and bows were the norm, not the exception. Where swords were drawn over the slightest encroaching of anyone’s boundaries. Where blood moistened the ground more than pure, fresh water. She was tired of it.

So she left.

She cast aside her name during the bloodshed she was forced to cause, forced to enable, in order to end the never ending cycle that the people followed. She cast aside the memories, the thoughts of love and warmth and cookies, for the sake of the iron tang of blood and victory, the feeling of accomplishment and rush she felt when she rode into battle. She cast aside her old baker’s apron for one that she washed nightly to rid it of the tears and blood of her enemies.

She rose again from the ashes of the baker’s oven, wings of fire and fury glowing like hot coals rebirthed sprouting from her back. In her ex-friend’s eyes, she was a monster. She was terrifying, something too wild to tame and too strong and smart to fool. But, to her allies, she was a powerful creature, a person so strong, she could fell an entire army with a single sword and a burning, all consuming rage.

That didn’t mean she didn’t remember her past, though.

She sat on the windowsill of the stronghold they had been calling their home, wind whistling by her ear as she stared at the twinkling, shimmering stars. Her teammates had built in above and below ground, making sure that the area was fully protected from any attacks made by the enemy groups of the government. Her gossamer cape flowed behind her, sunset-orange and beautiful against the dark clothes she wore to blend in with the environment, at least a little. She adjusted her glasses to look closer at a certain cluster, before penning down a general shape in a small notebook beside her. The wind played with her hair and the pages of the notebook, making her clutch the pages tightly as particularly strong breezes racked the area. Her bleached hair fluttered slightly into her face, making her shift her face to the side a little. She huffed in slight annoyance at the disruption in her work, but continued to map out a general shape of the stars. Nibbling at the end of the quill, she dipped its tip into a well of blood red ink, careful not to get any on the stones. No need to make Techno lose any sleep. Nikki heard the sound of claws scraping against the hewn stone bricks, tensing up instinctually. The footsteps stopped almost immediately, giving her good reason to think of a few specific people up at such an ungodly time.

“Hmm, is that Ranboo or Techno up at this time? I don’t think any other hybrids would be up so late- er, so early.” She patted the side of the area not covered by her parchment and work. “Take a seat, dear. Star-gazing can help take your mind off of things.” A enderspeak-warbled voice echoed behind her. “I would, but...my muscles hurt a lot, and...I guess it kept me up?” Ah, Ranboo. He didn’t seem like much to most people, but the Syndicate saw his worth the second the man teleported in and out of one of the most respected facilities and grabbed Dream’s mask from the top of the pedestal, all without tripping off a single trap. (Granted, he forgot why he needed it in the first place, and tried to keep it for himself due to his confusion with the object once he came back. They still counted it as a win.) Even then, Ranboo was not a threat, no matter how hard he tried.

Nikki sighed, soft voice hinting a slight smile. “Oh? Muscles are hurting? Now that’s a first.” She turned around, looking into the shadows to look for the slightest bit of off-white. A shift in the left side of her eyes made her focus on the spot, trying to see the enderman through the inky blackness without making him startle. Ranboo immediately backtracked. “D-don’t worry about me, though. It’s not your problem- I’m so sorry for intruding on your peace, I’ll just see myself out.” He backed away, slowly losing his shape in the shadows. “Wait, Lethe.”

Ranboo went stock still in the depths of the darkness. “I can give you a massage. I used to do that for people back in L’manberg! Besides, I needed to stop focusing on those silly clumps for a tiny bit, anyways.” She swung her legs onto the floor, scuffing her shoes on the cold, icy ground. She winced at the change in temperature, already wishing for the semi-warm winds of the nearby desert again, but she ignored the nagging wish in favor of flicking the nearest lever to her person. The lights flickered on, casting the whole hallway in a burst of warm, soft lighting, Even though the lights were relatively dim, both Nikki and Ranboo winced, shielding their eyes from the piercing white flash.

“Ow.”

Once the ivory light dimmed to a soft, gentle color, Nikki gently grabbed the enderman’s arm, careful not to grab at his fragile claws. The bi-colored hybrid yelped, eyes still trying to focus on the shape in front of him. “H-hey!”

Nikki didn’t even glance back at the stumbling man. “I found Phil’s grooming area a while ago. I think we can use that to massage your muscles in some nice positions, okay? I won’t slam you into a wall, trust me.”

From the way Ranboo’s slitted pupils flicked to the side, he wasn’t too sure, but he followed along anyways. Nikki stifled a giggle at the semi-nervous look on the obviously taller person. What does he have to be afraid of? It’s just her. She steered the two of them into a large, softly-styled room.

Dimming the lights as to make it more comfortable for the enderman hybrid, she tugged her ally onto the cushioned platform in the middle. She glanced around, scanning for items she could use to relax his muscles. Dozens of tools lay scattered all over the soft, padded floor. She walked slowly over to one specific pile, feet bouncing slightly off of the bouncy fabric on the floor as she did so. `Kneeling down carefully, as to not aggravate her own sore muscles, she picked up a few tools she deemed were useful to her endeavor.

From across the room, Ranboo’s tail swished nervously from side to side, almost afraid of the shadows of her figure dancing in the light of the redstone-powered lamps. “A-are you sure we’re allowed to be in here?” Small warbles of fear laced his voice. Nikki sighed patiently. “Yes, it’s fine.” She returned to his side, guiding him onto his back. The enderman hybrid vwooped quietly, eyes flitting back and forth on the objects he could still see. “You’re sure we can do this. Like, really, really sure?” She didn’t even reply to that one, rolling her eyes from behind him.

That was one thing she never could understand about the boy. He could literally kill anyone he wanted with his claws, tear muscle and flesh apart like it was nothing. He could claw and bite and scratch until all around him were bloody and broken from his onslaught. He could simply screech, and nobody would be able to stand long enough to get in his way.

Yet he didn’t.

Ironically, and almost eerily like her, he loved to make people happy. He stumbled over himself to keep others safe and satisfied, even injuring himself badly to create a new axe for techno when his went missing. He loved his people, even when they failed to love him back. He kept on giving and giving, just like her. Yet he persevered in it. She almost wanted to ask him how he did it. She could, if she wanted to. He was right there, in front of her. If she could only open her mouth to ask.. No. She turned her head away slightly. “Nikki?” She turned back to see him glancing back at her, heterochromatic eyes slitting with worry. “Is something wrong? I can get up, if you want me to. I’m so sorry for bother-”

“No!..I mean, no, don’t leave. It’s okay, I just had...a flashback, of sorts.” Ranboo nodded, head movements limited by his positioning on the cushion. She moved closer, tools lying on the side of the table beside the cushion. A part of her wanted to ask where they came from. Did she do that? Prime if she knew. She was too tired to think about it, too tired to notice that she didn’t place it there herself. Nikki slowly started rubbing the backs of her hands against the tense muscles on the enderman’s shoulders, moving in small circles as she did so. As she put more and more pressure on the taut muscles, they began to relax under her careful eye. The effort it took to make just the tops of his shoulders relax was monumental for the smaller warrior, but the sighs of relief from Ranboo made it all worthwhile to her. She smiled slightly, empathetic side of her soaking in a similar amount of happiness. Her arms moved downwards of their own accord. She let her muscle memory do the talking, allowing her mind to wander away. In a haze of softened focus and the sweet, sweet scent of chorus fruit wafting in the air, she bathed in the calmness and the warmth of the situation.

It was almost pleasant to feel the boy’s muscles give way underneath her. Almost, being the key word. The slight amounts of pressure she had to keep on Ranboo at all times to keep him from teleporting away was the only thing keeping her grounded. All the same, she enjoyed his company. He never really spoke much outside of small, casual conversations, leading to comfortable stretches of silence between them. Personally, Nikki loved it. If she could, she’d love to have the team lounge about together. She knew it would be the most quality time she would ever get with a group of people who respect her for more than her baked goods. Nevertheless, she knew it was nigh impossible. When one side of the team was awake, the other was asleep. When all of them were around, they would all be in separate rooms. When they were all in the same place, they always had to go out to get new supplies, or fight off another horde of fools. Nikki longed to have more time with them, but… thus was their life. She-they chose it. She wouldn’t trade it for the world, even though there were a great many downsides to- “Ah- Nihikki!”

Nikki snapped back into focus, worry coloring her words. “Oh, I’m so sorry! Did I hurt you?” His tail curled around her arm, wagging slightly. Wait, wagging? She pushed gently at the spot that elicited the reaction, getting a similar squeak and a giggle. Oh. Nikki processed the information for a moment more, before snapping back to attention again. “Ranboo, are you, by any chance, ticklish?” Ranboo’s whole body froze, even his tail. “U-Uhhh….Would you believe me if I said no?” She tutted slightly. “Hmm, no, I don’t think so.” She moved her hands lower, delighting in the fact that the enderman had to bite his lip in order to keep all of the giggles in. His ears and tail flicked slightly, broadcasting how much he actually enjoyed it, even though he tried to protest every time she slowed down her testing for even a moment. “Why are you hiding you little giggles? I just want you to be happy, little enderboo!” At the nickname, the poor boy melted, small little warped giggles escaping. She stopped massaging in favor of lightly scratching all over his back, giggling softly herself when she felt his tail wiggle slightly because of the change. “Coochie coo, cutie pie! Giggle for me, dearie!” Ranboo couldn’t hold it in anymore. His giggles increased in volume and in pitch as she scratched at his lower back, tail unwinding and wagging from side to side in mirth. “Ehihihi! Nihihikkihihi!”

She cooed softly at him, enjoying his flustered whimpering and high-pitched giggles that starkly contrasted the low, deep voice her ally normally had. She found it even more endearing that, even though she couldn’t see the whole of his face, she knew that he was flushed a deep plum all over his cheeks and ears. “What’s the matter, Ranboo? Are you okay? You look a little...plum, if I may!” Ranboo groaned through his laughter. “Nihihikki! Nohoho puhuhuns…” “Oh, no Punz, you say? Of course there’s no Punz! You think that greedy pink piggy would want to come out to see us at this time of night?” At that, Ranboo’s squirming increased, forcing Nikki to pin him down further into the cushion with one of her hands. “You know, if you keep struggling like this, I may have to bring out the heavy-duty tools.” Ranboo shuddered violently, blush deepening at her words. “Unless, of course, you can keep your arms up for me~” She rolled him over, careful not to tense up the relaxed muscles by moving him around violently

. As his deep purple blush was revealed to the cooing baker, Ranboo’s hands twitched, having to fight the urge to simply curl up into a little duochromatic ball and avoid all contact from the other in a bid to keep his last shreds of dignity intact. But Nikki’s command, albeit concealed by soft, loving almond eyes and a sugar-sweet tone, was final, and he knew it. He chose to turn his head to the side instead, ears twitching madly in equal parts embarrassment and joy. Nikki took a step back from the cushion, looking down at her feet to avoid the enderman’s swishing tail. Watching to make sure her little victim didn’t escape while her back was turned, she picked up a small set of preening tools, all intended for other purposes. She would have to make do; after all, most people didn’t have a set of perfect grooming tools for the soft, almost silky fur of an enderman hybrid such as Ranboo.

Especially not him himself. No, that altruistic enderman refused to take care of himself. He refused to take dust baths or lava baths, saying that it was ‘too much to ask’ of them to give him some sand or a fire resistance potion (and some privacy). He refused to use Phil’s preening brushes, insisting that ‘enderman fur don’t get as gunked up as wing feathers’. Yeah, right. Even as she moved back towards the trembling, whimpering hybrid, she knew that brushing his fur would be a real challenge. The only way she was going to get the whole of his back and sides, along with his legs and tail, would be with his full cooperation. And boy, even though he could be a real pushover, he somehow always ended up refusing help at the very last minute, She sighed, resigning herself to a very, very long night.

Haha I just speedran this fic feeling good :3