#namjoon nerd au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

uarmymoonlight · 4 months

Text

after the afterparty

pairing: nerd!namjoon X ex-mean girl!reader

genre: frenemies (? sorta) to lovers, rivals to lovers, college!au, one-shot, angsty, smut,

summary: after a night of partying with your (now ex-)classmates, namjoon finds you alone in the kitchen and unspoken feelings and desires come rushing to the surface

warnings: NOT PROOFREAD, reader’s a bit of an asshole, namjoon kinda idolizes her, lots of untold backstory for the #angst, tit/nipple play, biting (lightly)

words: a little over 4.8k

taglist: @kyglover @luaspersona

crossposted on AO3: here.

image by @/chimigraphic on twitter

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You finally take a deep breath of the cold night air. Eyes closed, beer in hand, hip leaned in against the kitchen counter. Another deep breath.

This night took a real toll on you: 2 hours of pre-game plus 4 of partying and an unbelievable 2 and a half more of after-partying, all in the name of socialization and redemption. But it’s over now.

You let the silence embrace and erase you. The outdoor lights paint the room with a faint blue and the only sound is a car passing by and the sink leaking. It’s just you there. The rest have gone to bed – their own or someone else’s - or back to their own airbnbs. But, as tired as you are, you stay there in the kitchen. This last moment of silence before you leave this place for good. And these long nearly 9 hours of today won’t matter. The people at the party won’t matter. Not even that award-stealing, headache-inducing, infuriating, dimpled assh–

A noise stops your thoughts. You turn to your right to see Namjoon kneeling down to catch the water bottle he’d dropped.

“Namjoon.”

“Hey”, he licks his lips “I...I thought everyone else was gone or sleeping.”

“So did I.”

A beat of silence goes by and then another, a longer one. You could almost laugh at the silence that sets between the two of you. Had this happened a while back, you would’ve already told him to fuck off and probably insulted him somehow. Then again, had this been back then, he would’ve been vexing you endlessly by refusing to let the silence just be, doing that nervous back-and-forth on his heels he used to do all the time and talking your ear off.

This isn’t back then, however. So now, you’re just looking at each other.

Alright. You said you’d change your attitude, didn’t you? Here’s a test for you to prove you did. Your chance to do something to Namjoon you’ve never done before: be nice.

“Congratulations.”

He scoffs, incredulous.

“You’re congratulating me?”

You can’t say you’re surprised he asked. There was a time you’d rather have eaten your own two feet before ever complimenting Namjoon to his face, a time you’d have done anything to not stay in the same room as him. Let alone just the two of you together.

“Well, I did tell you I would, when you deserved it” you remind him “You won the academic decathlon, graduated top of the class, and you got the girl. You deserve it now, so there you go: congratulations.” you raise your glass slightly to him.

He hesitates.

“I got a girl.”

You wait for him to elaborate. He doesn’t. You keep staring at him with those piercing eyes of yours. He hates them. Hates how much he’s always been so aware of them. Hates how much he’s always been so desperate to understand the emotions behind them. But, most of all, he hates how beautiful he finds them, how much they make him feel so on the spotlight, so special.

He watches you open and close your mouth. Once. Twice. You’re speechless? Now here’s one for the history books, he thinks. You’re probably debating whether you should ask him or not about what he meant by that. And God, he hopes you do. He wants you to ask him, he so desperately does. He needs you to want to know what he means. He needs this opening to tell you exactly why Seulgi isn’t the girl, he needs this one chance to tell you what he’s been holding in for so long, the feelings that are always on the tip of his tongue.

Namjoon waits for you to ask. But you don’t. You look away.

You can’t ask him, because that question leads to things you’ve already shut the door of, a long time ago. And he should know better than to try and get it out of you. But he’s Namjoon. Namjoon, always the hopeful idealist, always wearing his heart on his sleeve. And you, always the scoffing pessimist, the egotistical cold bitch. So, you take the coward’s route and when you look back at him all you say is:

“I’m leaving tomorrow.” So there’s no point in talking about any of this, is what you don’t say.

“I know.”

Again, neither of you talk for a while. In silence, you simply look at each other. The air between you is tense with something neither could name exactly. Namjoon breaks the silence this time.

“Dance with me?” he extends his left hand to you.

“There’s no music.”

He shrugs and insists “Dance with me.”

You look at his still stretched hand towards you and it’s almost a perfect flashback of that one night so many nights ago. When he had also reached out for you, in ways more than just physical. When Namjoon had laid out so much of himself for you and all you did was spit it back at him.

“You owe me this one”, he says. Maybe he’s an ass for insisting on this, but God knows you actually do owe him at least this one. You do, and you know it. “You didn’t even talk to me at my party earlier”, he adds.

And it’s just another time that you realize he really is a much better person than you are for using the party as leverage, and not…Well, everything else you’ve done. It’s something you’re not sure you would’ve done for him.

You softly put down your beer on the counter, looking at it while you do so. Anything to not look at him just yet. You need those extra few seconds to…You don’t know what for. To prepare? To breathe? It isn’t to think, surely. Maybe that’s it. You need to not think about what you’re going to do. When the can touches the counter, you spin it a couple times, staring at the label.

With your peripheral vision, you can see Namjoon’s offering hand still out. Again, you remember another moment, a long time ago, when he offered his hand too. You had refused it. God, you suck at this not thinking thing. Andnd you suck at not being a coward.

You finally peel away from the counter and walk quietly to namjoon. You stare at his hand and, taking your time, you slide yours in it. Feeling every inch of his skin until both of your hands are completely touching, and when that happens, you feel a breath you didn’t realize you were holding come out. You feel a bit pathetic for it. The worst part is you hear Namjoon doing the same thing.

Namjoon is smart, you know that. You and everyone who saw him beat you at everything academic-related year after year after year. He’s smart. But he’s not truly smart. If he were truly smart, you think, he’d pull away right now. If he were, he’d turn his back away from you for good.

He doesn’t. He slides his hand from yours to your elbow, caressing your forearm on his way and pulls you in. His fingers on his right hand brush against you, starting with your fingers and going up until he settles it on your waist, pulling you in even more. Not letting go of your elbow, he places your hand on his chest and you complete the action by sliding both your arms around his neck.

You still haven’t looked in his eyes, focusing on his shirt. Actually, his chest. You’d rather not think about that.

You feel his presence all around you, feel him on your skin even though very few parts of you are really touching the other. You feel his head close to yours, your feet almost touching. The two of you stand locked in place.

“Namjoon?”

“Yes?” His voice is little more than a breath.

“Move.”

You hear him scoff lightly and get brave enough to glance at him through your eyelashes. Only a shadow of a smile rests on his lips, so his famous dimples are nowhere in sight.

As he begins to lead you, that quivering bravery you felt moments ago vanishes. You go back to staring at his shirt while embarrassingly hoping you don’t step on his toes. You'd count your steps, instead of just hoping you're doing it right. That is if you knew how to do that. Shouldn't there be music in order to properly count the steps? Isn't that how it works? You count by following the beat of the song, right? But, then again, there's supposed to be music when you dance regardless of the counting. God, what a stupid idea. Why did you agree to this anyway?

Namjoon pulls you even closer, joining your chests and your thighs together as you draw in a surprised breath and let out a sigh. Now, your nose brushes against his lips.

Ah, right. That is why.

You really can't do this not-thinking thing. Product of years over worrying about your social status and over analyzing every interaction you had to make sure you came out on top. It’s actually a lot of hard work being the main top bitch in the area.

Briefly, you wonder what people would think if they saw you right now in his arms. You wonder what Namjoon thinks of this whole scene.

And what an interesting scene it is: the dim lights covering you like a blanket while you quietly embrace, a dance that is little more than just swaying softly to a soundtrack of whispers and wind. You can see your pale reflections on the window. The image akin to that of ghost lovers lost to time, only united by the sound of emptiness when time is frozen. Maybe is because of that image of emptiness and stillness, and because you already decided to leave that you tell him:

"I'm sorry.” It's said so softly, so hopelessly, that Namjoon nearly misses it.

There’s so much he could say to that and yet…He puts a hand on your chin and pulls you away just enough to look at your face. With your eyebrows frowning and your beautiful eyes wide scanning him, you look as scared as Namjoon feels. Namjoon traces your face with his thumb: eyebrow to temple to cheek to your lips. This last caress makes your lips part a little, enough for only a thread of air to pass, and eyes flutter.

There’s so much he could say, but there's only one thing he wants.

Your lips touch in a strong kiss. A kiss that is like that first leap of courage into a cold pool. You know the water will be cold at first, but you also know that if you don't jump, you'll never get into the pool. And just like in a pool, neither of you breathe for a while. Just like in a pool, Namjoon is terrified of that first splash of water, scared you'll push him away.

The kiss ends and you catch your breaths. Not for long, though. You grab the lapel of his jacket to pull him in again and relock your lips. Now, you make sure it's a proper kiss, you take your time learning how to kiss him and how you two fit. After a swirl of your tongue, you feel his hand on your lower back put more pressure and pin you closer. Your legs open slightly and he puts one of his legs a little in between yours, his crotch rubbing against yours as you kiss. As you sink your finger deeper into his jacket, Namjoon firmly grabs the back of your neck and presses his hold. The shivers all over your body and your moan encourage him.

A surprised gasp leaves you when Namjoon, with one hand grabbing your neck and the other around your waist, moves you until your back is against a wall. The cold surface touching your back provides a small break from the hot and heavy air between you and him. A small part of you - the part that isn’t busy kissing him - is a little shocked at how strong he got. When you first met him, he was all height and bones. You’d heard he’d started going to the gym some semesters ago, but you sorta refused to really acknowledge it and, when your eyes and body acknowledged that independently, your brain made a conscious choice to ignore it. At the moment, you don’t have much brainpower to make any choice besides making out with him.

Namjoon likes to think he's self aware enough to not be an arrogant prick, but he can't stop the feeling of pride taking over him as you touch him with such clear appreciation of his new physique. He responds to it with his own devotion, intoxicated by your trademark perfume, the same lingering scent that would always tempt him whenever you left a room.

You feel his toned chest and your hands travel along his strong shoulders. And you feel a bit stupid, a bit clichè, because you put your hands on his upper arms and squeeze his biceps. Kinda like in those stupid movies where the sweet bimbo cheerleader fakes coyness as she fawns over the totally not humble quarterback’s muscles. Okay, so, yeah, maybe it’s a bit eye-rolling worthy, but God! his biceps! If his biceps weren’t enough…his thighs! His thighs are huge and strong and you think you’re not really ashamed of how you gladly let him put one of them between your legs. Also, you don’t care that you two are unabashedly dry humping each other, like two horny inexperienced teenagers. Well, suppose that goes with the cheerleader-quarterback thing. Besides, Namjoon certainly doesn’t seem to mind, guiding and motivating your movements by stroking your ass.

Jesus, dry humping someone should not feel this good. You keep going, more, more and more, feeling yourself get wetter with each move, feeling Namjoon get harder each time you feel his dick brushing against your lower belly. He lifts your leg and repositions himself at a better angle so it isn’t just the friction that’s doing it for you, but the hard pressure of his dick too making you nearly lose your mind in need of him - and he's barely touched you. How come you're affected by him like this?

You open your eyes to see him leaving messy kisses along your skin, making his way down your neck past your collarbones. When he reaches your cleavage he makes it a point to maintain eye contact and lazily kisses the space between your breasts. Again, Namjoon isn't particularly conceited, still, he shows a boastful smirk at your eyes rolling back in pleasure. He continues his way down your body, his hands trailing its contours and feeling the soft silk of your dress he wished you weren’t wearing.

To him, you’re beautiful like a queen: proud, imposing, and powerful. You’ve always been. He thinks it’s your sharp, intelligent eyes, your intent look, but it’s also your straight and confident posture. Looking at you at the moment, though he can still see that spark of intelligence, your eyes are heavy-lidded. Your posture is not insecure, it’s solicitous, fully ready to give in to him. But you’re still you and because you’re still you that there’s still a hint of royal impatience in the way you press yourself against his body, demanding more out of him.

The vision of him going down past your belly button makes you take a breath and arch your back in anticipation. You'd sooner kill yourself before saying you felt butterflies in your stomach, but you do feel something. It takes all your little sense of self control to not grab his hair and lead him straight to where you want him. You don’t have a chance to actually do this since he’s already dipping even lower, eyeing you with malice and desire and nearly driving you crazy with need. You feel your nipples harden when he strokes your folds through your panties with his thumb before pushing the clothing aside.

“Namjoon”, you moan.

He lets out a low growling sound at that and begins exploring your pussy. Fingers and tongue take turns touching and tasting you. His fingers open and stretch you while his mouth sucks on your clit. You think you mumble something along the lines of “yes” and “there” a few times. Your fingers curl in response and your hips move following his rhythm. He licks and sucks and tastes and touches and strokes and you feel yourself closer to cumming with each movement.

Once more, you catch a glimpse of yourselves in a window. The sight is one of pure depravation. You see how dishelved you look, your lips swollen from the kisses and hair an entangled mess on your head, dress hiked up as one of your legs is proped up on Namjoon’s shoulder, a hand of his squeezing your thigh.You’re a bit impressed at how he’s still at it, when your last few hook-ups seemed to want to eat you out as quickly as possible only to say they did it. You’ve never really seen a man who seems so happy to eat pussy like Namjoon. You watch your reflection for a little bit longer while he continues edging you.

Enough. You need all of him now.

“Namjoon”, you say breathlessly. It was a command, but your mind can only think about his tongue on your pussy. You try again. You forcefully pull his head back “Namjoon.”

He hisses a bit due to the force of you pulling his hair.

“Yes, Your Highness?” you squint your eyes in annoyance hearing the mocking nickname he gave you so long ago. You hated the nickname, because you knew it wasn’t a compliment, just a veiled insult of his. However, hearing it while he’s on his knees for you…not bad, you think, not bad at all. Especially when his already deep voice sounds deeper and raspy, the words coming out with a drawl.

“Bedroom. Now.”

He’s up in a second, leading you upstairs. The way up is confusing and chaotic, with the two of you nearly running but barely letting go of each other, hot and lewd kisses exchanged while you walk. You have no idea how Namjoon finds the right door. He stops kissing you only to open the bedroom’s door, which you quickly shut behind you. He tries to put you against it, but you flip him and press him to the door instead.

For a moment, you only look at him. Spreading your hands on his muscular chest, you listen to your heavy breathing.

“Y/N.”

You kiss him again. You put your lips on his neck and take your time there, busying your hands with taking off his jacket and then unbottuning his shirt. When you finish, you stroke his bulge through his pants. Namjoon lets out a hungry hiss that has you rubbing your thighs together. The point of stroking him was to tease Namjoon, you wanted to see if you could get him so worked up as he’d done to you. Unfortunately for you, you find out that that’s a double edged sword and it’s sharper end is pointed towards you, because the more you touch him the more you feel yourself get hotter. Having him in your hand only makes your mouth water.

There’s only one thing you can think of right now. You pull his member out of his pants, stroking the full length once before you turn him and push him down on the bed. Namjoon watches you crawl onto the bed and fully take off his pants and underwear. It’s not slow and sweet or careful. Every motion of yours is aggressive and fast, eyes gleaming with a hungry determination Namjoon is sure is mirrored in his own eyes. You’re beautiful, so so beautiful. On all fours over him like a fucking lioness ready for her meal. Just looking at you like this makes him even harder.

Maybe the gentlemanly thing would be to stop and tell you there’s no need to repay the favor of earlier. But, well, maybe Namjoon isn’t a gentleman, after all. And he’d surely never deny you of anything, not when you so clearly want him. The idea of you wanting him just a fraction of how much he wants you is the best feeling in the world. Or rather, the second best. Because the first is definitely the feeling of your mouth on him.

You take his full length in your mouth, coating his dick with your saliva. Namjoon watches as you alternate between teasing kitten licks on his cockhead and properly sucking him off, your hands griping the base of his cock. God, you’re not simply beautiful, you’re gorgeous. He fights against the urge to roll back in his eyes in order to watch you going down on him. Your hair is thrown around, some of it tickling his thigh while your head keeps bobbing up and down, your makeup is smeared and your dress is a crumpled mess. And you’re gorgeous.

You make eye contact with him with your lips still wrapped around him and he thinks he’s gonna die. Or cum. Probably both. Maybe it’s his dick talking, but he thinks he’d die happy right now.

“Tell me what you like”, you tell him.

“You.”

The immediate blurted out answer shocks you a bit. You scoff.

“You really can’t keep it in.”

In the split second you don’t move, Namjoon starts to deflate. He ruined everything. He waits for you to get up and leave.

You don’t.

You lean forwards and kiss him. The kiss is nothing more than just the press of your lips together. You ignore the still lingering doubt in Namjoon’s eyes. Reaching past him, you go through the drawers on the nightstand. As you look for condoms, your tits are hanging above Namjoon’s head and he peppers kisses on them. After a few seconds, you get the condom out the drawer.

Namjoon tries taking it out of your hands.

“Give me, I can do it.”

“No”, you stop him. “It’s fine.”

You kiss him lightly on the cheek. Namjoon has to stop for a bit. You’d never been so…soft with him before. Not even in those few months long ago when you had been something akin to friends.

Not wasting any time, you put the condom on his cock. You quickly take your panties off and guide his lenght to where you want it. You two stare at each other as you sink yourself on his cock. Moaning at how he stretches you out. You love how full he makes you feel. He’s so big, his cock makes you feel so good. Having him in your mouth was one thing, having him inside you was heavenly. You place a hand on Namjoon’s chest.

“Lay down.”

Because you personally believe feminism is about having a buff hot nerdy guy under you while you get yourself off.

Head on the pillows, he watches you move your hips, leading him in a slow sensual rhythm. Moaning, your head rolls back in pleasure, mouth open to help you breathe better. The two of you pick up the pace, you bouncing on his cock a little then reverting back to grinding.

“Y/N, your dress. Please.”

Understanding what he means, you pull your dress above your head and toss it to the side. With both hands holding your hips, he only gives your tits a dazed glare. He keeps watching when you take your own hand and play with your tits. Namjoon growls and thrusts his hips upwards harder when you lick two of your fingers and use them to play with your nipples, caressing and pinching them, your palms massaging the rest of the soft flesh.

“Like that?”

The raspiness of your voice, that sparkle of meanness in your eyes, that one raised eyebrow on your face…it’s all almost too much for Namjoon. You are gorgeuous. And he’s so impossibly hard.

“Yeah.”

The word almost doesn’t come out. You shake your head and giggle at him. Only you. Only you could be bouncing on a guy’s cock, suck him off, have him eat you out, and, with just a little giggle, make the guy blush. Still, if feels so good to make you laugh. Even if it’s at him. So good.

Almost beats being inside of you. Almost.

Namjoon flips you and lays you down on the bed. Immediately after you hit the mattress, he’s already on you, mouth licking and sucking on you tit. His pace gets faster, more franctic, more desperate. Hitting deeper and deeper. When he hits a sweet spot, you moan louder.

“Yeah, there. More. More. Yes. Yeah,” you repeat the words like a mantra.

“So beautiful”, he tells you. “Almost there, baby.”

God, the pet name. “Can’t take it anymore”, you say.

“Yeah, you can, baby. You can take it all.”

He knows you can. You - open wide for him, hair spread on the pillows like a halo, nipples hardened for him, pussy clenching around him - can take it. You are the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

On top of you, Namjoon looks like a fucking beast, in the best way possible. Eyebrows furrowed and barring his teeth, his honey skin sprinkled with sweat. A drop of it slips from his forehead and falls on your cheek and you finally cum. Moaning his name over and over. He put his mouth again on your tit, gritting your nipple between his front teeth. With a final moan out of you, Namjoon empties himself inside the condom.

For a few seconds, you don’t move, just listen to each other breathing. Namjoon feels himself getting softer inside you and, on the back of his mind, he dreads the moment he pulls out from you. Dreads the moment you realise whatever you were doing was over, and so was your business with him.

Still, he can’t stay inside you forever. He pulls out.

He busies himself with taking the condom off him and throwing it away while he notices you get tissues from the nightstand to clean yourself up. He mentally kicks himself for not doing it for you, but then again, maybe you don’t want him doing this for you. That’s another kind of intimacy you haven’t given him the greenlight to do. Your voice breaks him out of his thoughts.

“Where’s the bathroom?”

You put your dress back on and his heart aches. “First door to the right. Hey, uh - “ he begins before you leave “I’ll go get water. Do you want some?”

You shake your head and leave the room.

Silently, he puts his underwear and pants back on and goes to the kitchen, trying all the way down to not think of you.

He stays a little bit longer than needed in the kitchen. Even after everything, he still can’t feel sure of anything with you. There’s still that ugly feeling of inadequacy whispering in his head that he shouldn’t get his hopes up. Tonight was just a fluke.

Namjoon goes back to the bedroom expecting you to not be there anymore. He imagines you jumping out of the bathroom window to escape him or sneaking off through the roof. If he wasn’t busy feeling sorry for what you two could’ve been, he’d probably laugh at the scenarios he made up.

When he opens the bedroom door, though, he finds you there. Curled up under the sheets on one side of the bed. Your eyes are closed and your face is serene. He hesitates.

“You’re not gonna sleep?”

You ask without opening your eyes. Namjoon doesn’t answer, but he climbs onto bed behind you. He doesn’t touch you, but he’s close enough that you feel his warmth beside you and his breathing on your neck.

A while of silence goes by. He’s not sure if you’re already asleep. However, there’s one more thing he needs to say to you, even if you don’t hear it. Something he was too much of a coward to say before.

“Stay.”

You open your eyes. You’re careful to make no move to alert him you’re still up.

You think about his request. Stay. Part of you wants to, part of you - a very small and recent part of you that is hopeful, a part that is only there because Namjoon coaxed it out of you - says you could stay. Stay. You could stay with him. Stay in his bed. In this city. Stay…

Like you said, though, that is a very small part of you. The biggest one is a coward.

When Namjoon wakes up to an empty side of the bed the next day, he instantly knows what happened.

You left.

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author’s note: my first attempt at writing smut (at least full on smut, star to finish), hope it doesn’t suck :DDDD any and all feedback/comments are appreciated

#kim namjoon x reader #kim namjoon imagine #kim namjoon smut #kim namjoon fanfic #rm x reader #rm imagine #bts fic #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts angst #bts smut #my writing #kim namjoon #namjoon #rm #bts

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bangtangalicious · 3 months

Text

placebo (m) | pjm (3)

pairing: jimin x reader (ft. jungkook & namjoon)

premise: you're assigned a soulmate backed by the science of compatibility that hopes to promote healthier, long-lasting, loving relationships. you find yours: park jimin is the exact opposite of you. a member of a notorious resistance gang, he doesn't believe in science, love, or the state.

summary: you find out that jimin isn't your true soulmate. he was a placebo - a series of control trials to see if simply thinking someone is your soulmate would be enough to make you fall in love. the issue is, you did. you did fall in love. hard.

genre: 18+ romance, smut, angst, soulmate!au, dystopian, love triangle, romeo-juliet, opposites attract, hurt-comfort

characters: student!reader, vigilante!jimin, student!jungkook, scientist!namjoon

warnings: 18+, contains smut, angsty smut, rough penetrative sex, creampie, cock warming, breast play, a lot of kissing. like a lot. emotional sex, oral sex (m), fingering, praise kink, jimin is a pro at snapping that bra off, a lot of stimulation, a lot of foreplay, aftercare, they're in love okay it's cheesy, feelings of fear, hurt, government conspiracy, medical procedure, memory loss, cursing

taglist: @tornparts @loona15 @effielumiere @agustdream8 @jnghs @dragons-flare @xiusmarshmallow @ratherbefangirling @infires-imagines @aretha170 @dvalitaes @kookiejeonie @ddaeng-angmoh @idk123906 @cuteipat @uarmyhore @natalie-rdr @yawnkive @sukunabitch @withluvjm @thesmeraldogirl @theceraunophilegirl

Jimin—

“We’re not actually soulmates.”

Disappointment couldn’t even begin to explain what Jimin was feeling as he saw your eyes shatter in front of him. His heart was already beating wildly with a sense of pounding worry—all from your tears. He wasn’t the kind of guy who expressed himself. He was a pawn. A soldier, of sorts. He took action.

Right now, he was paralyzed. Every drop of blood drained from him in one rush of cold. He was left with nothing. Not even your touch held enough comfort to warm the life back into him. His breath even, mocking him with a charade of calmness.

You continued to explain. He heard you—he swore he did, but everything seemed to numb him from comprehending.

“It was a placebo, where the chip signals but we aren’t actually compatible. So the basis for everything we felt—or everything we think we feel, was a lie. Jungkook found out and,”

Jimin blinked. Looking at you. You were still there. You were still real. Your eyes swollen with tears. Hearing your words hurt, but seeing you like this hurt even more. He needed to be strong for you—you were falling apart in front of him, and he was too stubborn to let you.

He wasn’t going to let you go.

Because he didn’t care. He didn’t care—in fact, a rush seemed to pulse into him, beckoning him onwards—the fact that you might have been some government-implanted craving he had was the only reason he was trying to stay away from you initially. You fought for him. And fuck, he loved you. It was too soon to say it. Hell—probably too soon to feel it but he didn’t have a doubt in his mind.

Last night, as he fell asleep in your arms, all he could wish for was to have that every day for the rest of his life. He had never felt so strongly bound to another person. Never felt so seen, so cherished.

This wasn’t about some microchip in your necks. To him, it never had been. You cared for him when he was hurt. You were a fucking nerd, obsessed with your geeky job in a way that enamored him. You worked so hard, were so fiercely determined and dedicated to your cause. You were messy, clumsy, a stickler for rules where Jimin liked to bend them, break them, or ignore them altogether.

He loved the person you were, unfiltered—he loved the person you wanted to become, and most of all he loved the way you loved him. Your heart on your sleeve. Calling out his bullshit. And always being exactly what he needed even if he didn’t know it himself.

And he knew all of this. So why did he feel so fucking terrified?

Jimin swallowed deeply. His hand leaving your face as you searched him for a reaction through glassy eyes.

“Tell me what this means to you, doctor” His words were hushed. His fingers gliding over your wrists before circling them into his hold. His lips hovered over yours, foreheads resting against one another.

Jimin wasn’t an idiot. He knew exactly what it meant to you. But he needed to hear you say it. He knew how hard you had fought for him. He had tried so hard to push you away, but you persisted because you believed in the Soulmate Initiative so strongly. That had been the catalyst. For you—it had been the condition of your love.

“Jimin” You exhaled. The regret in your voice carved into his heart.

“You know that never mattered to me” His grip on your wrists tightened, as if his touch would make you understand. It was all he could do to not scream—not begin to pathetically beg you not to care. Not to change anything—not to leave him.

He could see you scrambling for words. “There’s still a chance—” You attempted to reason. Because that’s who you were. Hard facts and logic. Your voice choked—Jimin couldn’t look at you a second longer. It was too fucking painful. Too painful to sit there and watch as you gave up on him.

He needed to leave. Get far away from you and think. Because right now he felt so helpless, so powerless—he didn’t trust himself not to say something he’d ultimately regret.

His eyes were red, wet with anger. A façade to cover the shattering in his chest.

“I have to get to class, doctor” His voice was serene. His gaze, tumultuous.

“Jimin please,” You tried to pull him back as he stood up. He yanked his hand away from you, rougher than he meant to, but enough for you to get the hint. “I’m so sorry”

He took a few steps towards the door. Turning back, he looked at you one last time. Your tear-stained cheeks. Your quivering lips.

“I’m not sorry” He swallowed thickly. Pulling on his leather jacket and grabbing his helmet, he tucked in under his arm. “I will never be sorry for falling for you, doctor”

“There might—” Jimin held up his palm.

“I’ll come back” His eyes softened as if to ease your anxiety, “We can talk about this later”

He was out of the door in seconds, unable to look you in the eye again. The fresh, cold air hit him like salvation from the tension. He gasped, breathing the sharp air in as his tears unleashed.

Sinking to the floor, he buried his head between his knees. His fingers gripping his hair in frustration as he sobbed quietly. He jerked his head back, hitting the door as he punched the ground next to him. Cursing loudly as he crumbled.

You—

Jimin would be back any second. You’d never felt quite so nervous. So anxious—not even when you opened your decision letter for your PhD program—not ever. He’d be back. Be home. And you two would have to face the impending doom you’d introduced to him.

More than anything, you felt guilty. Guilty that you were responsible for what he was going through right now. After trying so hard to convince him that he even deserved love, let alone from you—to gain his trust and then put him into this grey space of uncertainty. It wasn’t lost on you how unfair it was.

The mere thought of living your life like you had before Jimin—was pointless. He had awoken something within you. As frustrating as he was, as much of a tease and a flirt—he made every day feel like an adventure. He brought you to life in a way nothing else quite did.

But if your real soulmate was out there, you couldn’t help but wonder. Was it all fake attraction? Was what you could find with someone you were truly compatible with even better than this? More magical? More right?

You had to know.

And you knew Jimin wouldn’t see it that way. But even if you chose to ignore it—to let it go, it would drive a wedge between the two of you inevitably. Jimin’s flaws seemed to glare at you in a way that they hadn’t before. Everything impossible about your relationship seemed to weigh on you because you didn’t have the blind faith in the system anymore. You didn’t have the promise that this is how it was supposed to be.

The ring of your doorbell sent your heart into somersaults. You buzzed him, nervously tugging at your sleeves. You wanted to look pretty for him—unsure if that was cruel of you, but you couldn’t help but think that these were a collection of your final moments together.

He walked inside. Tired eyes, raven hair wispy from the wind. The cold tinting his cheek and nose. His black motorcycle jacket hugged his figure. The familiar scent of cigarettes and gasoline which you had come to associate with comfort. A scent that once made you nauseous.

Slugging his backpack off, he set it aside. Neatly, he unlaced his boots before stepping inside. He regarded you with a soft smile. His deep brown eyes were simultaneously relieved and broken.

“Hey you”

You approached him slowly, immediately wrapping your arms around his torso. You inhaled him. His unadulterated bliss. He was cold, but so warm. And when his arms wrapped around you, cradling your head to the crook of his neck, leaning into you—you wanted to simply melt.

You looked up. His pretty eyes—the way he looked at you—God. His touch flushed you over with heat as his palm reached your cheek, thumb caressing over your jaw, teasing your bottom lip.

You didn’t know what to say to him. It seemed, you didn’t need to say anything. Jimin sighed into you, his lips relaxing against yours. So soft. So tender. Incredibly sweet.

And you wouldn’t stop him. Maybe it was avoidance. The impending melancholy of the night you were about to have. The inevitable heartache. You deepened the kiss, pulling Jimin closer to you desperately.

He grinned against your lips as you did. Hands falling to your hips before cupping the backs of your thighs. He lifted you up, still kissing you with the same delicateness. Taking you to the couch where he sat you both down.

Falling to his back, you crawled on top of him. Lips not parting. Breaths getting heavier.

Because when you kissed, nothing else mattered. Nothing else even existed. There was only him. Him and the storm of pleasure brewing in your chest. The heat coursing through your veins. The dizziness spinning in your head.

His fingers curled over your hip as he flipped you down. Hovering over you now, he admired you. Eyes memorizing your every crevice. His chain fell from his neck, the cool metal making you shiver as it glided across your hot skin.

He peeled off his jacket, leaving only his tight white t-shirt, before returning to you. Body caging yours in. Forearms resting on either side of your face as his fingers traced your cheeks.

“I don’t tell you enough” He murmured. You raised your eyebrows, curious. “You’re so fucking beautiful, doctor. So pretty,” His eyes were half-lidded, kissing you chastely, “Sexy..gorgeous..mine” He smacked against your lips between each word—sending a rush of praise to your head.

And you loved it. You loved his words like they were feathers tickling against you. His voice was silk and you wanted to dance in it for eternity.

The pressure of his body felt incredible against yours, his heat like a blanket. You’d never felt so safe—so cherished in his hold.

“Where the hell did you even come from, doctor?” He hummed playfully against your lips, “How the hell find me? You’re a fever. You’re my disease and my cure”

You tugged at his chain, urging him to kiss you harder. To glue his lips to yours.

He groaned, hips rolling flush against yours as his mouth worked you into serenity. You could feel how badly he needed you, but he was taking his time. On the other hand, you were frantic. Your fingers tugging at the hem of his shirt. Tugging it up his torso as he chuckled. You could feel his scalding skin on your fingertips. Exploring the expanse of him. The contours of his body, the soft skin.

His teeth tugged at your lip, nipping at you playfully as you scratched your nails against his chest. He finally allowed you to pull this shirt over his head, giving you a moment to admire him, chain contrasting against his golden skin before you tugged off your own top.

You were left in sheer light green bra. Delicate. Something you had bought as a joke a long time ago, wondering if it would actually make you feel more confident. Jimin’s pupils darkened.

“Let me” He exhaled shakily. You turned over, on your knees as Jimin held you up—one hand on your neck pulling you back to him. His fingers gripped your jaw as he kissed your cheek, smirking against you as his other hand expertly snapped your bra off. So fast that it sent shivers down your spine. He replaced where the latch once was pressing into your back with his own lips, kissing up your spine until melting at your nape.

You arched your back as the bra slid down your arms, onto the floor. Jimin’s coarse fingers immediately covering your breasts. Pinching your nipple between his fingers sensually. Trailing butterfly kisses up your neck. You twitched under his touch. Small, needy gasps leaving your parted lips.

He hummed with pleasure, tasting you across your jaw, chest pressed against your back.

“So good to me,” He kissed your cheek. The blisters on his fingers against the soft skin of your breasts making his touch so incredibly erotic, it had you weeping in your core. His touches so subtle, and yet you were reacting to him so desperately. Craving him, overwhelmed by how fucking good it felt when he touched you.

“Please” You weren’t even sure what you were asking for. He chuckled softly, teeth grazing against your ear. “Jimin p-please”

“I love that. I love it when you ask me so nicely like that” He pushed you down on all fours. You let out a surprised gasp at his sudden roughness, but your cunt tightened. He pulled off your jeans, and then his own. Leaving your panties on he grabbed a handful of your ass and squeezed it.

“So fucking perfect,” His large hands moved all over the flesh of your thighs. He let two fingers tease along your damp slit. “What’s this huh? Wet for me already baby?”

His fingers pushed the cloth aside, finding your tender clit. You bit back a moan as he began to trace small, slow circles. He leaned down on you, the feeling of skin on skin riling you up even further. His lips caressed the back of your shoulders with hums of approval as his fingers continued to coax you. His other hand holding your hip steady. Pinching your ass tenderly.

“Jimin” You gasped breathlessly, fingers gripping the couch tight. His fingers continued to push you further and further towards nirvana. He pulled you up suddenly, fingers still on your clit—but he needed to see you. Needed to look into your eyes as you came. Hand wrapped around your neck, enough to feel his control but not enough to choke you.

“You gonna cum for me doctor?” Jimin teased, forcing your jaw towards him. A grin on his lips mirrored the mischievous glint in his eyes. You nodded pathetically.

“Yeah?” His tone raised, taunting you further as he smashed his lips back on yours. Tongue pushing through your lips as his fingers circled your clit faster. Your moans were swallowed by him—body going limp as waves of pleasure crashed down on you. Your body bucking forward, taking Jimin down with you. Twitching all over as your cunt leaked onto his hand. His rough, desperate kisses muffling your screams.

“That’s it baby, so good for me” His fingers led you through the aftershocks before dipping into your sensitive cunt. “So good and wet all for me, right?”

He pulled himself off of you, and you turned, on your knees—reaching for his cock.

“I want to suck your cock”

Jimin blinked at you incredulously.

But you were determined. You began to stroke him gently. He hissed, reaching behind you to steady himself against the back of the couch.

“You’re so desperate for me, aren’t you baby?” He leaned down to kiss you cheek. You looked up at him, eyes earnest—because you wanted him to feel so good.

You wanted to make up for all the pain you knew you were about to cause him. He deserved everything—heaven and the stars and everything beyond, you wanted him to have it all. For now, you let your lips kiss the flushed tip of his cock.

“F-fuck,” He reached for your chin, stroking your jaw tenderly. “You’re so good to me baby fuck”

“I,” You diverted your eyes with shame as heat crawled over your cheeks. “Tell me what to do”

Jimin gulped, eyes shifting as he understood your words.

“Open wide” He pushed two fingers against your lips until your mouth opened enough for him to slide them inside. “No teeth okay baby—and then just take it in as far—” He pushed his fingers down your throat. You tried your best not to gag, until finally you couldn’t help it. He pulled his fingers out, a string of saliva following. “As you can”

His thumb brushed against your bottom lip, tugging on it playfully as he cooed at you. It was the eagerness in your eyes. The fierce determination he knew you were feeling to please him.

“You’re so” He chuckled softly, “God I—” He choked on his words.

Now was hardly the time.

You beamed at him, taking his cock into your mouth little by little. His head tilted back as he cursed to himself.

You loved seeing him like this—amazed that you could make him feel like this. Motivated by his response, you began to slowly bob your head. He exhaled verbally, letting out a loud groan.

“Just like that baby, fuck—good girl” His voice was pained as if he was losing his resolve and it only fueled you to move faster. He tugged your hair, giving you a warning stare. “If you do that I’m gonna cum baby. Slow down”

You gave him a mischievous look, deciding to disobey.

“Y/n” His voice was low, demanding. He recognized you were teasing him, and as much as he wanted to fuck you—he couldn’t bring himself to stop you. His thumb swiped at the drool from the edge of your lips. A shock rippled through his body as he reached for your shoulder to keep him steady.

“Fuck. Fuck. Baby I’m—” His hips bucked, cock twitching inside your mouth as you felt his warm cum on your tongue. You let him go, swallowing his cum—and before you could even process it, he lifted you up, forcing your legs around his waist and carried you to your bedroom.

He laid you down on the covers gently, kissing the inside of your thighs, all the way up your stomach, where he showed you a little extra love, up to your breasts—he nibbled on them playfully, loving the way you’d twitch for him. His eyes stayed glued to yours. Dark and needy.

“I’m gonna need a little bit” Jimin confessed after deciding your breasts had been abused enough by his mouth. For now. He let his fingers continue to toy with them as he hovered over you. “But we should talk, hm?”

You inhaled sharply.

“Y-yeah we should”

Jimin grinned, taking a peak back into his mouth, this time letting his tongue run rampant on the plushness.

“Jimin” You hissed, grabbing his hair.

“You taste so good baby, I can’t help it” He kept on kissing your chest. Rolling onto his side, he pulled you into his embrace. Your naked bodies intertwined as his hands roamed all over you. You cradled his head against you, fingers running through his silky black hair.

You whimpered, hopelessly aroused by his actions. Your pussy pulsing, wishing so badly to be stuffed.

“I need you” You nudged him. “I need you so bad”

Jimin grinned, pulling away from you. He kissed you softly.

Then his eyes grew serious.

“Y/n” His tone had changed. He wasn’t teasing anymore. “If I asked you to just let it go,”

“You know I can’t” You responded. Jimin looked away. His fingers still tracing your sides.

“Yeah” He said after some time, kissing your cheek, “I know”

You gulped, cupping his face in your hands. “Can I just say that, right now, in this moment, based on every experience I’ve had in my life up to this point—I love you?”

Jimin scoffed, but he couldn’t hide the smile in his eyes.

“I just need to know”

“If there’s someone else, you mean.” Jimin gave you a pointed look. “What happens then, doctor?”

“If someone else is my soulmate, that also means someone else is yours. I can’t keep you from that”

“I know I don’t want that” Jimin gripped your hips possessively, pulling you impossibly closer. “I don’t care. I love you”

A tear rolled down your cheek. The hurt that you so blissfully ignored moments before, returning.

“I’ll meet Dr. Kim Namjoon at the conference in a few days. He can check for us, and then”

“You already know though, don’t you?” Jimin challenged. “You think we aren’t compatible”

You paused. “Well I—”

“Go ahead, doctor” Jimin smiled, a hint of despair in his gaze, “Go meet your soulmate. No one in this universe will love you the way I do, I am sure of it. So sure that I’ll take the chance of losing you forever if it means you’ll believe me one day”

He began to get emotional. You ached for him. Ached for the pain he felt in his chest. The pain you didn’t want him to feel.

Your hand rested on his chest. Feeling the beat of his heart against the tense silence.

He kissed you again. Desperately. His fingers tugging your panties aside as his now hard cock slid against your folds.

You kissed him back—even more desperately. Savoring whatever you had left with him. Losing yourself in him as though time were running out. Spreading your thighs to grant him entrance, he fucked into effortlessly. Filling you up until you felt so right—so whole. He stilled, nose tracing yours as he gazed into your eyes.

Tears threatened the edges of his pretty brown eyes.

“I don’t trust them Y/n” He whispered, the tear unleashing, “What if they brainwash you—what if seeing your soulmate resets your brain chip and—” He gasped, lip trembling.

“I won’t forget you, Jimin” You assured him with a comforting hand stroking his back.

“You don’t know that” Jimin gulped.

The true fear in his eyes hit you like a reality check. Reminding you that this man had no trust in the system, and you were asking him to take a gamble on it.

“Maybe you’re not supposed to know about the Placebo. Maybe they’ll do something to you, and me—and you’ll be in danger and I won’t know”

You kissed him sweetly. “Baby” You mumbled, knowing you’d never called him that— “Don’t think like that”

“I mean the fact that we fell in love, without the compatibility assessment, means the whole system is bullshit—doesn’t it? They could pick any two people and condition them to love one another with the chip. That’s not something they’d be okay with people knowing”

“N-not necessarily” You sighed. “Baby—move” You urged him, as if he forgot his cock was nestled deep inside of you. He hadn’t.

He gave you a tight thrust. Your lips parted, and he did it again, watching your expression intently. He held you close—you held him close. He buried his face into your neck, pushing you onto your back so he could fuck you deeper. His hips slammed against yours, deep, quick thrusts that you could feel throughout every inch of your body.

“You’re heaven” Jimin gasped, kissing your cheek again, “I don’t think you fucking understand what I feel for you, doctor—I swear I”

“I do, Jimin” You assured him, “I feel it” He began fucking you faster. “And I love you”

He stilled so he could kiss you again. “Say it again” He begged, “Please. Say it, mean it, please”

“I love you” You stared into his starry eyes. His fingers intertwined with yours, pushing your arms above your head as he resumed his ruthless pace. His lips pasting against yours in between your confession, “I love you Jimin—I do—So much”

He burst inside you, but he couldn’t stop. The moment was too charged, too emotionally ripe. He kept himself sheathed inside of you, cum stuffed deep. Hugging you close, he kissed you—a man addicted, and you were his vice.

You fell asleep, at some point.

You heard him whisper against your eyelids—I won’t give up, at some point.

You woke up, at some point.

He was gone.

You—

You arrived at the conference. You hadn’t heard from Jimin since that night—but preparation kept you distracted. This was a huge moment for your career—and you’d worked too hard to fall short now.

Jungkook was by your side, dressed in a light grey suit—the conference badge contrasting the plain white button-down shirt that gripped his chiseled chest. Around you were folks of similar adornment—chatting with their colleagues, setting up posters and grabbing coffee.

“Good—you made it” Your boss, Jung Hoseok, who you loathed approached the both of you. “Is everything set up for my talk later?”

You exchanged an irritated look with Jungkook, who bit back a smile. “Yes, sir”

Dr. Jung hummed, pleased with your response. “Very well. Go network. This conference has the best of the best. Y/n, I know you were interested in meeting Dr. Kim, would you like me to make an introduction?”

You stiffened. Dr. Kim Namjoon. He was the most brilliant biochemist of your time. He single-handedly piloted the Soulmate initiative with the help of his neuro-engineering team. He developed the compatibility algorithm that you spent your whole life studying. Appreciating.

He was infamous. And it didn’t hurt that he was gorgeous too—you had all of his books, memoirs, magazine articles. It was safe to say you knew quite a bit about the man. And soon he’d be right in front of you. In the flesh.

“If you don’t mind” You held back your excitement, but your hand trembled, gripping onto the pamphlet that a volunteer had forced into your hold earlier. Dr. Jung nodded, motioning for you to follow him.

“I’ll come too, if that’s okay” Jungkook quipped. You made a face, but knew you had no right to take this opportunity from him either, as much as you preferred to meet him alone to discuss your dilemma.

Up the elevator, Dr. Jung led the both of you to the top floor of the hotel in which the conference was taking place. From the clear glass, you could see the city sprawled out—serene, snow beginning to melt off of the ground. More folks were out and about. Children playing in the now cleared-up parks. Spring was coming, soon.

You stepped out of the elevator, and were met with a series of guards lining the hallway. It made sense; you mused. Kim Namjoon was a high-ranked State scientist. Which meant he was a prime target for a Resistance kidnapping or attack.

Your lips wavered. A part of you was disappointed at the lack of hope you had that you’d find out you and Jimin were compatible. Your gut knew you weren’t. But you loved him, so it could be. It could be him, right?

Why did you love him, if you weren’t compatible? It was so easy to think of all the reasons—so simple in your mind, but hard to find the words. You trusted him with your life. He was attractive, kind, in a bad situation but had big dreams. Dreams to make change, and you admired that.

As you walked past the guards, Jungkook’s hand brushed against yours. You looked his way and he winked at you excitedly. “You ready?”

He whispered against your neck. Too close—maybe it hadn’t been before, but now it felt too close. Nevertheless, you smiled back at him and nodded.

It occurred to you that Jungkook might be your real soulmate.

“Namjoon!” Dr. Jung opened the double doors to the suite. You took the room in. Hardly a room—there was a whole lab set up in there. Humming with the soft whirr of state-of-the-art machinery, bright white lights everywhere. Translucent monitors display complex molecular structures and neural pathways. Simulations.

The middle of the room had a holographic interface projected a three-dimensional model of a chip. The chip. Tiny filaments extended from the chip, resembling delicate neurons connecting to an unseen network.

Your heart skipped a beat. This was paradise.

There was not a drop of chemicals in this lab. Everything was tech-based, simulation and modeling predicting chemical interactions, hormonal regulation, neural response and bodily action.

“Hey Hobi” You heard a low, smooth voice. Your clenched your fingers into your palm. Taking a deep breath, you turned the corner where Dr. Kim was sitting.

God.

He sat casually on a stool set up by a plain workstation. He was dressed in a black turtleneck, black trousers—his black hair gelled up. You’d neve seen him without a white-coat on, as that’s how he tended to appear in media pictures. Here, in front of you now, he was relaxed. He was just a person. He was a man.

His dimpled smile made your throat tighten. A smile that reached his eyes with such a genuine glimmer. He greeted Dr. Jung with a suave fistbump, exchanging some words with him before chuckling lightly, patting him on the back and swiveling his chair towards you and Jungkook.

His smile widened.

“Hey there” He nodded his head politely. Both you and Jungkook bowed slightly. “So you’re the poor kids who got looped into helping this motherfucker” Your eyes widened at his comment, but Dr. Jung simply rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah—I’ll see you downstairs. Drinks tonight? The usual?” Dr. Jung pointed at him for confirmation as he reached the door. Namjoon nodded.

“Of course Hobi, I’ll see you later” He redirected his full attention to the both of you, shutting the computer in front of him. “Please, take a seat” He motioned behind him and a small robot pushed two stools over to where you were standing.

“I’m Y/n L/n” You extended your hand to him.

“Ah yes, I’ve heard about you. You study my work, huh?” He winked, making your face rush with heat. His eyes passed over to Jungkook. “And you?”

“Jeon Jungkook, honored to be here, sir”

“Good. Good, so tell me about yourselves”

“Actually” You exhaled. “Dr. Kim, if you don’t mind—there’s a matter I’d like to discuss with you”

He raised his eyebrows. Folding his arms over his strong chest in a way that made you aware that this man worked out, he leaned back. “Oh, sure. Let’s hear it then”

You were about to speak when Jungkook interrupted.

“Y/n’s soulmate was a placebo. We’d like to run the compatibility test to find out who her real soulmate is”

Your mouth felt dry. Namjoon’s eyes flashed with interest, gaze remaining steady on you.

“How’d you figure it out?”

You looked at Jungkook.

“I uh, hacked some data” Jungkook confessed, shyly.

Namjoon let out a soft laugh.

“Well alright. As you know, any scientific RCT trial needs a control group. We use these placebos to understand the actual effect of the Soulmate algorithm’s deployment on the outcomes of interest. Procreation, individual health and wellness, etc.”

He was speaking to you. Directly to you, even though Jungkook was right by your side.

“The way the chip works is that you see someone who surpasses your compatibility threshold. There isn’t one soulmate. I suppose there could be, but we have to factor in proximity and chance for encounter. That’s why the microchip will only give the Soulmate signal once you meet someone who has also passed the cognitive-sexual threshold who surpasses your compatibility level. Another threshold, unique to each person and defined by many metrics”

It was nothing you didn’t know. Jungkook on the other hand, was fascinated.

“Wait so, both and Y/n and I were past out cognitive-sexual threshold and we saw each other all the time before she met…her placebo. I didn’t meet her compatibility threshold?”

Namjoon seemed to bit back a giggle. “Well, Jungkook? Is it? Right, it goes both ways. She didn’t meet yours either” His eyes flashed at you. You couldn’t help but notice that they were honey-brown, almost gleaming gold in the light.

Jungkook seemed to recede into himself.

“Is there a way I can check my compatibility with my placebo soulmate?” You asked, tugging at your sleeves.

“Well, I suppose” Namjoon took a second to think, “If you know where they are right now, and get to them without looking too many people in the eye” He chuckled.

Right, you mused.

“Because if you reset my chip, and I see someone else, it’ll register they’re my soulmate before I can even look Jimin in the eye” You mumbled.

“Exactly. We can do that, if you’d like. But no law says you must be romantically involved with your soulmate. Either way, your choice is still your own”

You gulped. You just had to know.

“Please, if it’s alright, can you reset my chip?” The words felt like acid leaving your mouth. Namjoon shrugged nonchalantly.

“Sure thing. Jungkook—this is a medical procedure, technically. We will need some privacy”

“Oh, right” Jungkook scrambled to his feet, rushing out the door rather quickly. Namjoon reached for a tablet set near the window and tapped a few buttons. Some robots arrived, removing the table and stools and setting up a medical bed in it’s place.

“Do you not like your placebo soulmate?” Namjoon asked, while the robots were at work.

“Actually I like him a lot.” You confessed. “But I believe so strongly in the benefits of your algorithm. So I just need to know for sure”

Namjoon squinted at you, but nodded.

“Do most placebos work out?” You blurted, covering your stomach with your crossed arms. “Is there a statistically significant difference between outcomes with truly compatible soulmates and placebo ones?”

A grin tugged at Namjoon’s lips. The robots finished setting up the medical equipment and he motioned for you to lie down.

“What do you think, Y/n?” Namjoon mused as he connected a few wires to the back of your neck. “Do you think placebos would work out the same way? Is believing someone is your true love enough to make you love them?”

You gulped. His fingers brushed against your nape as he plugged in your chip.

Until it hit you.

“It doesn’t matter” The thoughts came to you as the words left your mouth, “It isn’t even about love. Compatibility. Or health.” Your eyes quivered as you noticed Namjoon’s grin widening.

“I-It’s about your faith in the State” You drawled, “If you believe in the State—in the Soulmate Initiative, then it’ll work. And if you don’t—”

You sat upright suddenly, feeling uneasy. Jimin’s fears echoing in the back of your mind.

“Don’t worry—you did fall in love. You clearly believe, so you have nothing to worry about.” Namjoon admired you for a moment. “You’re very smart, Miss. Y/n. It’s a shame it took us until now to meet”

Namjoon proceeded to tap a few more things on his tablet.

“Now before we do this, you should know. There is a small chance the reset will cause both you and your placebo soulmate to forget that you’ve seen each other. Not to worry, though, I can make sure that you head his way after the procedure to see if you two are compatible”

You gripped the edges of the seat with your trembling fingers.

“But don’t worry, you’ll be unharmed”

Forgetting Jimin—that’s harm. That’s fucking harm. Your mind was screaming warning.

“Wait actually I don’t—”

“Relax,” Namjoon placed a hand gently on your shoulder, pushing you back to your chair. “I’m here. I’ll tell you to go find this fella and look him straight in the eye before anyone else. You can trust me”

Strangely enough, you believed him.

“Okay”

“What’s his name?”

You hesitated. Drawing attention to Jimin’s citizen file wasn’t a smart idea given what you knew about him.

“P-park Jimin”

“Good. Now close your eyes. This might give you a brief migraine”

Jimin—

It had been pathetic. Jimin showed up at the steps of Jin’s home—the home he shared with a few other members of the resistance. It was late—he could hear the debauchery happening inside loud and clear. The familiar stench of tobacco and liquor radiated from the dim light behind the shuttered windows.

He inhaled sharply. He spent the whole day wandering. Trying to drown himself in schoolwork until even that seemed pointless. He needed a distraction. Something to ease the pain. Until he figured out how the hell he would get you back. He needed anything.

He sat down on the splintered porch steps, ignoring the fleet of giggles from what he assumed were sex workers. Staring at his palms, he recalled the sensation of your touch. His fingers curled into his palm, wishing your hand was there but instead grasping at the crisp late winter air.

“Well look here,” Jin’s familiar voice boomed from the entryway. Jimin looked back to see him, a flimsy tank top under his leather jacket which was being pulled off by a beautiful, voluptuous woman. “Ay, fuck off whore—that’s my little brother and oh,” Jin pouted, shoving the woman off of him, “He looks so sad” Jin leaned down to tug Jimin’s cheeks in a way he always used to do when Jimin was younger.

“Why you sad baby boy?” The woman cooed, “If you’d like, I can make it all better”

Jimin rolled his eyes, “No, thank you.” Redirecting his attention to Jin who slid down to sit by his side, a bottle of beer in his hand— “God, doesn’t it ever get a bit old hyung?”

Jin scoffed, “I’ve had about enough of you sitting on your high horse and judging us, Jimin. You are one of us. We’re at war. Well—” He took a sip, “We will be, soon enough, and we need you. Your brother was—”

Jimin hissed. Jin took the hint, luckily.

“Look,” His tone grew serious, “We had one of our mole’s hack into the microchip database. We were right. The kind of data they collect and the way they use it to strategically puppet aspects of our society—it’s robbing free will. Altering memories. Manipulating thought through exposure and environment. And because there’s not specific legislature that oppresses people, they play it off as the way the world works. No. They built these structures, Jimin-ah. We have proof.”

Jimin gazed up at the obscured night sky. Clouds veiled any semblance of starlight, mirroring the shadow over his thoughts.

“She isn’t even really my soulmate” Jimin chuckled bitterly. “It was a fucking placebo”

Jin stared at him for a moment, before his eyes softened with pity. “Fuck Jimin,” He handed him the bottle. Jimin took it, sipping the sour & bitter liquid. “You really like the bitch, huh?”

“Hyung” Jimin snapped. Jin simply chuckled.

“My bad, my bad. The scientist. Whatever the fuck her name is. Listen. If you want to know if your feelings are genuine or not, you need to take out your microchip. It’s the only way you’d know for sure. The fact that there is a placebo cohort for something like this is kinda fucked up. Whatever happened to ethics?” Jin scoffed. Jimin took another swig of the beer.

Should he? Should he take it out? The microchip was the physical embodiment of the state's reach into his very soul.

Jin could sense that Jimin was considering his idea.

“Honestly, it’s about damn time you did Jimin. Things are getting serious around here. We’re going to start taking real action, advocating for our cause. We want you in—we’ve always known you’re a smart kid. Good with words and all that. Hell, you’re not meant for the battlefield Jimin. You’re meant for a throne”

Jimin set the bottle down, again looking up to the skies. “I don’t want a throne. I just want to not be a fucking puppet anymore. For them, or for you guys”

“Then take what’s yours. This is what your brother wanted, Jimin. Be more involved. Take charge. Your girl didn’t give up on you—the state fucking manipulated her to give up on you. They took everything from you—it’s damn time you see that. It’s damn time you fight for what you deserve”

Fight. He was going to fight for you. He had promised you that. Promised himself that.

He reached for the back of his neck.

“Fuck the State” He mumbled, “I want this out. Let’s go”

Jin grinned ear to ear, “Fuck yeah!” He patted Jimin on the ack excitedly. “We’ve got a bot that can do it in the back, come on”

You—

“Y/n?” The soft call echoed in the sterile room. Your eyes, weighed down by the fog of unconsciousness, fluttered open. The harsh fluorescent lights above you forced a squint. A lingering scent of antiseptic filled the air, accompanied by the gentle hum of machines.

Behind you, a subtle tug and disconnect confirmed the unplugging of your chip from the machine. The cool room air kissed your skin, sending a shiver of unease through you.

“Good, your vitals are all normal. You’re doing great,” Namjoon's voice reassured. Turning, you saw his back as he typed notes on his laptop.

It came back to you: where you were. Who you were. Everything seemed to click. Your heart seemed to hurt. You couldn’t understand why.

“Do you remember Park Jimin?” Namjoon asked. You blinked in his direction.

“Who?” Your response was automatic, a clouded memory of someone fading into obscurity. The emptiness inside of you seemed to pulse.

Namjoon continued typing, his focus on the screen. “There’s a man,” he hummed, “I need you to go directly to him and look him in the eye to see if he is your soulmate or not. His file suggests he may be at the University Law Library. Try to minimize eye contact with strangers as you head there.” Namjoon turned back around.

You looked at him.

In those honey eyes. Those sweet, smiling, kind eyes.

A sharp pain in your neck burned.

They say you’ll just know.

come scream in my asks! thanks for reading you hotties~ lmk what you think <3

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

292 notes · View notes

dollfaceksj · 11 months

Text

♯♯MASTERLIST

✱ MINORS, DO NOT INTERACT. ✱

✱ all works are written by me. no reposts. ✱

✱ all works contain mature themes. ✱

✱ banner by @archivedkookie. ✱

✱ mainly yoongi & jk fics. ✱

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

⇢ i tend to write bratty y/ns. if that’s not your thing, i doubt my fics will be enjoyable to you.

⇢ ♤ [ angst ] ⋆ ♧ [ fluff ] ⋆ ♡ [ smut ]

⇢ ✎ [ wip ] ⋆ ✄ [ on hold ] ⋆ ✓ [ completed ]

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | knj ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✄ ]

↳ [ drugdealer!namjoon x fem!reader ⋆ acquaintances ⋆ pwp ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ the end of a movie i’ve seen before | knj ✦ [ ♤, ✓ ]

↳ [ namjoon x reader ⋆ friends with benefits ⋆ sad ending ]

COMPLETED

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ met him last night | ksj (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✓ ]

↳ [ nerd!seokjin x fem!reader ⋆ plot-twist ⋆ porn with plot ⋆ two-faced seokjin ⋆ two-shot ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | ksj ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✄ ]

↳ [ incubus!seokjin x fem!reader ⋆ neighbors ⋆ porn without plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ schemin’ | myg (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ♧, ✓ ]

↳ [ ceo!yoongi x fem!reader ⋆ producer!yoongi ⋆ artist!reader ⋆ boss/employee ⋆ infidelity ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ can’t afford love | myg (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ♧, ✎ ]

↳ [ yoongi x fem!reader ⋆ exhusband!yoongi ⋆ divorced!au ⋆ mom!reader ⋆ dad!yoongi ⋆ exes ⋆ second chance ]

DISCONTINUED

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | myg ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✎, ✓ ]

↳ [ yoongi x fem!reader ⋆ exes ⋆ second chance ⋆ porn with a lil plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ ornery, scandalous & evil | myg (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ✄ ]

↳ [ yoongi x fem!reader ⋆ age gap (post uni) ⋆ brother’s best friend ⋆ enemies ]

COMING NOT SO SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ bitter | jhs (m) ✦ [ ♤, ♡, ✄ ]

↳ [ hoseok x fem!reader ⋆ divorced ⋆ infidelity ⋆ porn with a little plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | jhs ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✄ ]

[ hoseok x fem!reader ⋆ established relationship ⋆ porn without plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ everybody loves somebody | pjm (m) ✦ [ ♤, ♡, ✓ ]

↳ [ jimin x fem!reader ⋆ best friends ⋆ fwb ⋆ hanahaki disease ⋆ one-shot ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | pjm ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✄ ]

↳ [ jimin x fem!reader ⋆ brother’s friend ⋆ camgirl!reader ⋆ porn with a little plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | kth ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✄ ]

↳ [ showbiz!taehyung x manager!reader ⋆ co-workers ⋆ porn without plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMING SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ pending. . .

━━ S E R I E S ↴

·˚ ༘ taste of a poison paradise | jjk (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ✓ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ fuckboy!jk ⋆ university ⋆ toxicity ⋆ improv ⋆ crack drabble series ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ devoted to you | jjk (m) ✦ [ ♤, ♡, ♧, ✎ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ best friends ⋆ plot-twists ⋆ lots of conflict ]

COMING NOT SO SOON

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ O N E, T W O & T H R E E S H O T S ↴

·˚ ༘ reminder | jjk (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ♧, ✓ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ proboxer!jk ⋆ exes with benefits ⋆ second chance ⋆ three-shot ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ the pink pill | jjk ver (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✓ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ best friends ⋆ porn without plot ⋆ one-shot ]

COMPLETED

·˚ ༘ still don’t know my name | jjk (m) ✦ [ ♡, ♤, ✎ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ frenemies ⋆ neighbors ⋆ porn with plot ⋆ collab three-shot ]

COMPLETED

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

━━ D R A B B L E S ↴

·˚ ༘ see you like that | jjk (m) ✦ [ ♡, ✓ ]

↳ [ jungkook x fem!reader ⋆ fwb ⋆ porn without plot ]

COMPLETED

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

⋆ taglist ⋆ askbox ⋆ requests & commissions ⋆

⋆ ao3 ⋆ wattpad ⋆ twitter ⋆ insta ⋆

⋆ ko-fi ⋆

⋆

602 notes · View notes

darksolace18 · 2 months

Text

Joyride

Biker!Namjoon x reader

Authors note : This will be based on the fanart picture above. Friggin biker BTS au has me in a chokehold.

Masterlist

--------------------------------------------------

One thing Namjoon hated, was stereotypes.

People tended to club up pastel+soft appearance = Soft girl who is kind, loved to read and do all those soft aesthetic stuff.

Or, for instance, Pierced guy with tattoos + motorcycle + leather = Bad boy who hooks up with everything has a pulse with no academic interest and most probably bullies nerds.

He had been in such circumstances a lot of times, where his personality was misinterpreted due to his fashion sense.

Yes he had tattoos, yes he had a very sexy looking bike and loved riding it, yes he looked everything like a bad boy.

But yes, he also loved to study, read books and write soft and gentle music.

He had an IQ 148 for a reason.

But still, truth is, he is clumsy. Very very clumsy. But he is never clumsy during riding a bike.

But this time, staring at you through the modern looking glass wall of the bakery you were working at, as your eyes locked in with his, he fucking lost his balance and crashed right on the gravel floor as his bike skid away from him.

The streets were empty at this hour, but a few passer-by had gasped and crowded around him, asking if he is alright.

He groaned, feeling a thick liquid run down his forehead as he cradled his right arm, which made the veins of his forehead pop out in pain.

There was a loud shout, a female voice, shouting at the crowd to stop crowding him as gentle hands held his face, lightly slapping his cheeks.

"Stay awake, stay awake, open your eyes, that's it, that's it, your doing great" The voice, sweet as tingling bells, praised him as he droopily kept his eyes open.

His vision was slightly blurred, but he could very well make out your features as you gently tried to pull him up.

You groaned at his weight, after all, he was pure muscles.

He would have chuckled in some other scenario, but it even hurt to breathe.

"Can-Can anyone hold him for a minute?" You say, trying to keep steady on your feet.

He whines at the loss of your lovely warmth as some other man held onto him.

"Hey, stay awake mate. " The guys voice entered his eardrums in a painful jab.

He wanted you to hold him.

But soon, he heard the very familiar roar of his bike.

His senses heightened, feeling angry and ready to spew shit to anyone who touched his precious bike but then-

Then-

His brain sputtered and stuttered. His thoughts going to a standstill. He could only hear the throb and beat of his heart in his ears and the pain in his forearm.

You sat perched on his bike, dressed in the soft pink shirt and brown trousers with the familiar bakery apron, as you ordered the man holding him to gently help him sit behind you.

He could not have asked for a better vision before his death.

The bike was the typical black Kawasaki Ninja ZX 4R, and seeing you sit on it with you back arched, leaning forward, it did something inside him.

But sadly, his sex appeal in that state was similar to a chicken nugget.

Slowly and steadily, he was set on the back of the raised seat of the bike, uncomfortablly flopped onto your body, breathing hard.

Is this how girls feels whenever they would sit on the back of the bike?

His ass felt like it was sitting on a pin. And his height did not help him at all.

At this rate he would fall off.

But, suprisingly, you grabbed his arms and wrapped it around your full waist, ordering him to hold on tight before you took.

Namjoon had seriously underestimated you.

You looked a soft, shy girl when he saw you through the glass window who did not know anything about being cool or whatever this was.

And he was pleasantly, happily regretful.

You knew how to ride a bike. How cool is that?!!!

"Stay awake, don't close your eyes! Talk to me, what your name?" He heard you yell over the sound of wind.

"I AM awake, thanks for asking. But i would like to know yours at first" He says, a small smile on his lips, groaning occasionally at the painful thumbs on his forearm. It must be broken but, how is he not screaming and crying right now?

You let out something similar to a laugh "I asked first!"

"Namjoon, Kim Namjoon at your service ma'am" he replies.

"Well, right now it's me who is in service. I hope you don't mind me using your bike to escort you, do you?" You speak out, words filled with mirth.

He grinned "Use it as much as you want. You look sexy anyways"

He cursed internally. This isn't how he usually advances on girls, but right now his pain made him do useless things.

But, surprisingly, you laughed yet again "Why thank you Namjoon, but I don't know if it's you or your fear of life speaking" you said as you smartly manouvered through the traffic and also the twists and turns of road.

"It's me speaking. I can see your a proffessional" he says, happily nuzzling into your neck.

"Namjoon, it tickles." You deadpan.

"Oh shit im-"

"Chill dude, why are you getting so shy? You weren't so when you were blatantly staring at me. Do you do that always?" You ask.

He shakes his head as no, his energy depleting more and more as his eyelids turned heavier.

"Don't fall asleep on a pretty girl joon, the hospital is here" you nudge him with your shoulder and keep him awake.

Soon enough, the view of the hospital came into his sight and immediately, he felt his body give out.

Well, so much for keeping up a charming appearance.

The next time he opened his eyes, he swore he saw a great wakening light.

But it turns out it was just the vicious lightbulb in his hospital room.

He felt woozy and his right hand felt heavier than usual. His throat was parched as he reached for a cup of water.

But soon, a cup had been put infront of his mouth, filled with water and urging him to drink.

Putting his lips on it, the cup tilted up as the cool refreshing water slowly trickled down his throat.

"How do you feel"

On hearing the voice, Namjoon instantly spat out thelast remains of water and coughed as water entered his sinuses.

He didn't expect you to be there.

"I think at this point I'm a hazard to your health." You say cheekily as you start to peel an orange, sitting beside him in a chair.

Namjoon blushed, hard. Why were you still there?

"Eat up" an orange was forwarded towards him.

Namjoon turned and looked at you and cursed a little.

You were out of the clothes he had last seen on you. Instead sporting a sweet yellow coloured sundress with white polka dots printed on it, your hair loosely braided.

Namjoon swear he could kiss you right now, you looked so pretty, so beautiful.

"Stop staring. You were out for 2 full days" you say as you stuff the orange in his mouth, unable to hold your hand up any longer.

"You have a broken hand and slight bruising on your ribs. Thankfully, no concussion. But i dont think your family of seven boys will be as soft as me" You said, looking at him straight in his eyes.

Namjoon's eyes widened. You even met his brothers?!

Namjoon felt a little self conscious, he wasn't the most attractive in his friends group, what if you started to like someone else there?

Namjoon's mood visibly flattened, as he slowly chewed on the orange.

You noticed his fallen expression almost immediately. Your heartstring tugging at you slightly as an innate urge to pat this pouty man's head came over you.

Unlike his exterior, he was pretty cute.

You had slightly freaked out when he passed out completely on your back on the bike, nearly falling off of it.

She managed to make it through the remaining distance and immediately screamed at the medical staff for immediate assistance.

They were quick and soon he was admitted and his brothers were contacted.

You sat there outside the emergency room for about an hour before 6 screaming voices were heard and 6 figures clad in various mismatched outfits barrelled through the glass doors.

"WHERE IS HE? WHERE IS KIM NAMJOON?!" A guy with broad shoulders, strikingly handsome face which was red due to the amount of screaming came into your view.

You waved at them, ushering them towards you.

"Yes hello, he is in the emergency room for now." You informed them as they tensed up.

A young boy with several piercings and a shy demeanor stepped forward, eyes darting around nervously "W-well...will help be alright?" He asked.

You gave him a comforting smile, nodding at him "A nurse informed me, he will survive. It wasn't anything major, just a broken hand and a gashes forehead and several other scratches and all that. They are just doing the final check up and will soon shift him to the general ward." You informed.

They visibly sagged their tensed shoulders, relieved.

Another silver haired guy, who strangely resembled a cat stepped forward and nodded at you "Thank you for your help, if you please, we want to pay you for your generous help. And also can you please tell us where his bike is so we can bring it back?"

You took a step back, eyes blown wide with a frantic expression "No no, I don't want money. Absolutely not. And don't worry about the bike, it's parked in the parking lot. I drove him here on it. And riding that bike was enough gift for me"

The guy's eyes widened "You rode that bike here? With him on your back?"

You nodded as a reply.

Before they could continue, the same nurse came out and informed them that he is stable but will be out for 1 or 2 days because of the sedatives to help him rest.

You heaved a sigh of relief too. You could finally feel the sticky feeling of dried blood on your back as it started to itch. This shirt was ruined.

"Yeah so, I'll get going now. Please tell him a get well soon from my side" You bow to them and head towards the exit before the silver haired man stopped you.

"W-would you visit him tomorrow again? I'm sure he would like to thank you properly" he told you.

Thinking about it, you really did want to visit him.

He caught your eye afterall.

You nod at him with a big smile "Yeah, if you don't mind I mean"

The broad shouldered guy shook his head aggressively "No no, Absolutely not, your welcome here anytime miss".

Two days passed since then,you would visit him with a basket of fruits or small muffins with you everytime you were free from work.

You also bonded with the brothers well by that time, and the youngsters practically loved the muffins you brought.

"So uh, what next?" Namjoon's voice interrupted your thoughts, as he looks at you with a forlorn look.

"Hm...I wanted to ask you something Kim, if you don't mind" You ask him, leaning towards him slightly.

"Uh yeah, anything" Namjoon felt his face heat up a little at the slight proximity.

"Do you want to go on a date with me?" You ask, completely throwing Namjoon off at the straightforward question.

Namjoon felt like a high school girl with a crush, all red faced and stuttering and stumbling in front of his crush.

"I uh- yes?" He uttered out, making you raise your eyebrows.

"Is it a question or an answer?" You quiz.

He immediately shakes his head "NO NO, I mean I would love to go on a date, if you want to i mean"

You smirk at him and continue to peel more oranges.

"so....is that a yes?" Namjoon asks, quite unsure of your expression.

You look up at him and hand him yet another orange "After you get discharge, rest for a week, then bring your bike out at the central plaza. We can go bike riding as a date" you tell him, popping a orange in your mouth this time.

He flushes up, the image of you sitting sexily on a bike was NOT what he wanted to imagine with you infront. But he couldn't help it.

"FINALLY, MY BABY BROTHER IS GETTING THAT ASS!!!" A very loud voice, interrupted them yet again. Making Namjoon groan.

"FUCK OFF SEOKJIN" He yelled, embarrassed out of his wits as the girl laughed out loud beside him.

"YAH! WHERE ARE YOUR HONORIFICS YOU SHIT MONSTER".

#bts army #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts #bts fanfiction #bts x fem!reader #kim namjoon x reader #bts kim namjoon #kim namjoon fic #kim namjoon fanfic #kim namjoon #BikerNamjoon

24 notes · View notes

codebts · 2 years

Text

TEARS DRY (m)

couple jungkook/reader, ft. eunwoo

content smut, angst; hybrid au, university au; one-sided love, unprotected sex, descriptive sex, choking, spitting, slapping, degradation, marking, toxic behavior from both characters, crying, alcohol use, dirty talk, loss of virginity, i don’t even know what else.

summary “he walks away, the sun goes down. he takes the day, but i’m grown. and in your grey, in this cool shade, my tears dry on their own.”

words 6,570

author’s note hey. it’s vi. i made a new account, and i’m completely rewriting the series. i changed the title, since it didn’t quite fit the plot. it’s inspired by amy winehouse’s tear dry. the original, of course. fixed a lot of things that made me annoyed with the first part. it still isn’t completely perfect. i think it’s going to only be one part, but i’m not sure yet.

“So Jungkook,” asked Jaehyun one Wednesday afternoon, “what’s your relationship with (Name)?”

“(Name)? As in nerd (Name)?” Lian quipped, ears perking curiously.

Their captain’s relationships were often kept relatively private, so it was rather unusual for him to be linked to someone so publicly. . . and to a prey hybrid of all people.

As usual, the panther hybrid could only glare as his football teammates stared eagerly at him from across the table.

After a beat of silence, he clicked his tongue. “We did stuff. Once. Twice. It doesn’t mean anything.” He confessed reluctantly.

“She must be a pretty crier. . . if you know what I mean.” Yuta elbowed Kai, earning a soft chuckle.

“And she makes him lunch too. What a sweetheart.” Namjoon added, to which Seokjin nods in agreement. This seemed to suffice the team’s thirst for answers, and they quickly returned to their own conversations.

“She’s very kind, Kook. You shouldn’t be so harsh to her.” Jimin eyed the man. Jungkook could only roll his eyes before turning back to his phone.

All of a sudden, a familiar scent swept through the university’s cafeteria. Raspberry, violet, and amber — a mixture that could make any man, prey or predator, fall sick with hunger. There was only one individual’s scent that could have that effect on people and Jungkook couldn’t help but groan in dread.

“Jungkook!” You squealed, bounding towards him. You were wearing a knit sweater —stolen from Jungkook’s closet— and black trousers, paired with your favorite suede clogs. Two ivory ribbons were tucked at the base of your floppy rabbit ears, giving you a rather innocent appearance. You were anything but, the panther hybrid thought.

Unbeknownst to Jungkook, his teammates were more intrigued of his latest lover than he had initially thought. As confusing as this “couple” was to everyone, they could understand why he claimed your virginity. After all, you smelled delectable, and you were a feast to the eyes.

They observed you with curiosity and something akin to desire, so much so that Taehyung could practically feel their want. If Jungkook didn’t want you, they certainly did.

“Lucky bastard,” Soobin whispered, eyes lingering on your plush lips.

Jungkook looked up, black hair drooping softly over his honey-colored eyes. It gave him an almost smoldering gaze, and you couldn’t help but blush as you approached your crush of over a decade.

You had fatefully met him at a park near in your neighborhood, where he had been visiting his maternal grandmother. He had saved you from a group of predator boys who were toying with your prized telescope, a gift from your father. Even in your youth, you knew he was stronger than most— more powerful than most. An aura befitting of the most highest on the food chain oozed from the adolescent. Enthralled by the sheer strength and confidence that the lanky boy had, you began to follow him everywhere, despite the obvious difference in class and species.

Along the way, you befriended Taehyung and Jimin, a bear and wolf hybrid respectively. They were quite a mischievous pair, but they were kind, and accepted your devotion to their best friend. They saw the deep connection you shared with him, despite Jungkook’s denial. After all, he hadn’t actually pushed you away, and often tolerated your romantic gestures.

Tolerated it enough to accept your request for him to take your virginity, at least.

“I missed you so much, Kookie.” You exclaimed, curling your arms around his neck from behind. You knestled your nose into his neck, taking in the strong scent of whiskey, sandalwood, and mint.

“Don’t call me that, brat.” He chastised, pulling away from your touch. You pout.

“Of course, sorry.” You apologize before digging into your satchel. You sat down, right between Taehyung and Jungkook, and pulled out a bento box. Shyly, you pushed it to Jungkook.

“Here.”

Jungkook peeled open the box as if it was second nature. Food. “You can leave now,” He says with a swish of his tail, his attention piqued.

“But look! We have matching boxes.” You replied, pulling out another homemade box. When Jungkook didn’t say anything, you slumped deeper into your seat, ears wilting against your curls.

His best friends notice.

“It’s lovely. You must’ve put a lot of thought into it.” Jimin said, petting your head. You basked in his touch, legs subconsciously thrumming. Rabbit hybrids adored physical touch, no matter who it was from.

“Aren’t you cute? If you don’t want Jungkook anymore, I’m always available.” Taehyung winked and turned to smirk at Jungkook.

“You better not, brat. You aren’t allowed to fuck any of my friends.” Jungkook snarled, slightly pinching your arm in warning. The panther hybrid was known to be quite territorial, so you didn’t give it much thought.

It couldn’t be jealousy. Jungkook wasn’t interested in you, and he made it terribly clear.

Instead, you grinned with your eyes closed. “I’m sorry, Taehyung. My heart will always belong to him.” As a sincere apology, you offered him a tuna roll tucked between your chopsticks, to which he gladly accepted. With a sneer, he grabbed your wrist, eyes never leaving Jungkook’s, and bit into the roll. Your cheeks turned pink at the close proximity, and you quickly pulled away in embarrassment. Even if you were attracted to Jungkook only, Taehyung was still a young man, a beautiful one no less.

“Delicious.” He purred with a flick of his tongue, and Jimin laughed.

Jungkook, who had watched the entire interaction from under his bangs, was turning red. He clenched his fist from under the table.

If you were so in love with him like you said you were, why were you feeding another man? Were you trying to make him angry—? Why was he getting so worked up anyways!

“Kookie?” A shrill voice exclaimed, breaking Jungkook’s train of thoughts. His head shot up, and within seconds his anger had evaporated.

“Noona.” Your ears perked up at the —was it fondness?— in Jungkook’s velvety voice. He has never called you noona, despite you being a few months older.

Does he even call you by your own name?

You quickly realized that she had used your nickname for him, noticed that he didn’t even flinch at it, compared to how he reacted when you called him Kookie.

“Hey, Jeon. I haven’t seen you since Saturday.” said Karina, a fox hybrid. Female fox hybrids were known to be enchanting, and she was nothing short of the standard. Karina was gorgeous, with her large bust, pin-up curls, and slender figure.

The entire table was staring at her. Some were practically drooling at the sight of her exposed skin. You couldn’t be mad at them, you were ogling her chest too.

“Missed me?” Jungkook replied smoothly, leaning his chin against his palm. He was smirking, almost smiling, something you rarely see happening. Karina crossed her arms and pushed herself onto his lap. He maneuvered to fit her, unintentionally pushing you into Taehyung’s chest.

“You took a toll on me, Jungkook.” she purred into his ear, “I couldn’t walk for days.”

You deflated at her words. He was sleeping with other women? He smiled charmingly, unfazed by her dirty comment.

Sure, he didn’t exactly say you were exclusive, but you weren’t the type to be in an open relationship. You’ve given yourself to him countless times, how did you not know that he wasn’t monogamous?

Karina turned to drink in your small frame. You wouldn’t beat her in a beauty competition, she was sure of that. “Is this your girlfriend? A tiny bunny hybrid. How. . . submissive. She isn’t fainting on you when she’s pleasing you, is she? You know you can be a bit much. . .” She purred in false concern, biting her lip to hide her sleazy grin. Your puffball tail twitched at her backhanded comment.

“She’s nobody, noona.” He said, voice husky and ocean deep.

Taehyung’s eyes widened, and so did Jimin’s.

Your ears drooped back, and you could feel tears forming. Rabbit hybrids were considered to be terribly, if not the most sensitive creatures, and you couldn’t help but prove that stereotype by often crying. You attempt to hold back in hopes of putting a strong front for everyone, despite the fact that all you want to do is run back to your apartment and sob into your pillow. Jungkook despised weak people, and you had an annoyingly teary deposition.

Karina looked at her wristwatch and sighed. “Aw, I have to go now. My biology class is about to start at three. I’ll call you.” With a quick kiss on his cheek, she scampered off.

He didn’t pull away from her touch once.

“You slept with her Saturday night? We were just together on Friday. And Saturday morning. And Sunday night. And the day after that. And yesterday, before your morning class.” You whispered in disbelief, lips quivering. Jungkook glanced at you, and rolled his eyes.

“We aren’t exclusive, (Name). I’ve never once said that I would stop sleeping with other women.” He replied nonchalantly, casting his eyes back to his phone. “You shouldn’t expect things from me. I’m not some prey hybrid that can be satisfied by just one newbie girl.”

His selfish remark completely set you off.

“You know how much our shared moments mean to me, Jungkook. I wanted them to be special, to be shared by only us. You. . . know I have feelings for you. You know how much I—I wanted to please you.” You stated, surprising him. His best friends looked on in shock.

“And I’ve told you multiple times that I don’t see you romantically.” Jungkook retorted harshly. “You shouldn’t have assumed in the first place. Always fuckin’ jumping to conclusions. You’re good at that, huh?”

Did you forget your place?

“So it’s okay that you’re fucking someone else, but I can’t fuck your friends?”

“For heaven’s sake, (Name). You and I just fucked a couple of times. That’s it. That’s all that it’ll ever be. I don’t want you in any permanent sense. I don’t want to be tied down to prey, to a virgin rabbit girl who can’t handle my needs. You cry easily, you’re pathetically clingy, and you have zero self-awareness. Do you know what family I’m from? Do you think anyone in my clan will ever accept you? Please, for the sake of me and you, let your stupid feelings go and leave me the fuck alone.” He laid it hard, slamming his fists on the table as he got up. “I don’t even know why I bothered giving you the time of day. I must’ve been out of my fuckin’ mind.”

The noise caught the attention of virtually everyone in the room. They began to whisper as they stared at you and Jungkook’s brooding figure.

“She’s so obsessed.” Whispered Lalisa, a girl from your astrophysics class.

“A rabbit and a panther? That’s unheard of. She must seriously be delusional.” Said another.

“He’s just being realistic. I mean, he’s heir to Jeon Industries. He can’t just date anyone!”

“Isn’t he going to marry that snow leopard heiress, Akra?”

“Look at her. She’s so desperate!”

“Hasn’t she been chasing after him for years now? It’s time to let go.”

“She’ll never be loved if she continues this!”

She’ll never be loved if she continues this.

You nodded slowly in realization, and everything seemed to finally click.

He would never be yours, no matter how hard you tried.

Jungkook searched for a response, for a hand to come flying towards his face, anything. Maybe even a punch to his gut, and yet, he received nothing. His comment had been excessive, and he knew it. So, why did you choose not to react?

His glare softened into surprise as he soaked in your tear-stained face. Despite the sadness in your eyes, a watery smile adorned your lips, but it carried a weight of finality. It was a silent declaration that you had reached your limit, no longer willing to endure his outbursts and nonsense.

You rose from your seat and gazed up at the ceiling, taking in deep breaths in a desperate bid to stem the flow of tears that cascaded relentlessly down your cheeks.

"Of course, I apologize for intruding," you murmured softly, offering a bow before making your way toward the exit.

“(Name). (Name), wait. Don’t be fucking petty. I said wait!”

You didn’t hear him. It was as if your body had shut down.

“Bun.” Jungkook groaned, feeling almost apologetic. He reached out for you, unsure of what to do, but you shrugged him off.

That was a first.

He sensed the overwhelming sadness emanating from your very presence, as if it permeated the air with its poignant, vulnerable, and jaded essence. It was a scent of resignation, as though you had surrendered to defeat.

Were you. . . giving up on him?

Guilt tore through him as he realized his unnecessary brutality, his eyes flicking to the crowd witnessing the entire exchange. Despite their support, bitterness consumed him.

You found yourself in the nearby art classroom, pressing against the door as you slid down to hide your face in your knees. Your carefully applied makeup was beyond salvaging, a futile attempt to impress him. With each slow breath, you struggled to steady your racing heart. It wasn't just the insults anymore; something deeper had fractured between you, unleashing a torrent of suppressed emotions.

Instead of cleaning yourself up, you choose to cry out all your heartache.

His cruelty cut deeper this time because you had allowed yourself to be vulnerable with him, only to discover that your connection meant nothing to him. Every kiss, every touch, and every glance filled with bittersweet longing now felt like a cruel facade. You had opened yourself up to him completely, body and soul, only to realize that you were just another passing girl in his life, a test to see if he could. It hurt because you had hoped for something real, something lasting, but it seemed he was only interested in those who could match his pace.

Despite your romantic gestures and the raw display of your vulnerability, nothing seemed to sway his resolve. He remained unmoved, unaffected by the depth of your emotions and the naked honesty you laid bare before him.

It was all for nothing.

You could vividly recall your first time with him. He hadn’t said anything sweet, or kind. He didn’t kiss you sweetly, or tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. No, it was all teeth and desire, all blood and bitemarks. He left no room for affection when he took the virginity of the only prey he’s ever bedded.

He had first eaten you out, nails leaving deep indents into your soft thighs as he held you open, like a sacrifice, knees flat against your chest. He ran his tongue repeatedly over your clit and into your weeping hole. You came with a choked sob as you rode out your high on his face, begging for him to fill you. He sank two thick, practiced fingers into your quivering cunt, curling them as he went in and out. You’ve never felt something so deep and penetrating, and his carnal look only spurred you on even further. God, he could really feel it. Your insides were so warm, so cushiony, so soaked. With it’s spongy, elastic ridges that he just knows would clamp right onto his shaft, he could practically feel the pleasure it would give to his cock.

Fuck, he wasn’t even inside yet!

“You’re so fucking pathetic, look at you.” He laughs as you shutter when he presses against your sweet spot. “Just rutting against my fingers like a bitch in heat.” He watches your reaction carefully, hungrily, not wanting to miss anything. He could feel himself growing increasingly hard. It was rare for him to get worked up so easily over simple foreplay, and with a measly virgin bunny of all people.

After pushing in a third and stretching you out, he pulled out, leaving you contracting around thin air. When he pulled out his cock from his sweats, you clenched in both anticipation and dead. It was chillingly large, fit for a predator. More so. No wonder he took his sweet time in prepping you.

“You can back out, pet.” He drawled. Leaning back on his knees, he began stroking himself, eyeing your heaving chest.

Yeah. No condom. He needed to feel this completely. This moment needed to be ingrained in his fucking cranium, to be stored for all his beat-offs.

You weren’t packing as much as the other women he’s fucked, but he found himself being very pleased with your soft, yet disheveled appearance. You looked absolutely wrecked, nails digging into his knees that possessively held you in, and he reveled in the fact that he’ll be the first and only one to see you like this.

“Don’t want to.” You mumbled, trembling under his hungry gaze. “Want to see you the moment you finally fall in love with me.”

Hah. What a fuckin’ brat.

“I won’t stop even if you say so.” He tries.

You reach for his free hand, and push his palm against your mouth, kissing it. “Make sure I can’t say stop then.”

“You’re being very snarky today, huh? You think this pussy can make me stay?”

“I hope so.” You replied innocently.

“Hm? You hope so?” He looks down, sliding his cock between your pussy lips. “Look, my cock’s going to practically fill your womb, baby. You can’t possibly take me.”

“I will, Jungkook. Don’t push me away. I-I can be the cock sleeve you want me to be.”

“Who taught you that?” He snarls, cupping your chin harshly.

“Hoa said I should say that.”

He growled, and his eyes flashed red. You could only gulp in both nerves and unadulterated anticipation.

“You better show me that this little sleeve is worth it, then.”

He loomed over you, hand gripping the bedframe of your childhood bed behind you. It cracked under his grip, but all you could focus on was his hot breath and muscular neck.

“Don’t tell me I didn’t warn you.” And with that, he sank into you. He went impossibly deep, filling every crook, cranny, and crevice with one single stroke. He sighed, involuntarily pressing his forehead against yours. In less than a second, he had found the bundle of nerves tucked deep within your body and you could only close your eyes in a silent scream. It hurt so much, but you couldn’t be happier.

He was fucking up your insides, kissing all up on on your cervix with just his tip, and you could feel the blood of your ripped tissue seeping past his cock. He stilled, and raised his torso.

“Good?”

You could only nod deliriously, and with that, he began drilling into you unforgivingly. He curled his large hands around your neck, your head, your shoulders, anywhere he could hold you, as pounded into you. You instinctively placed your hands on his chest, but you didn’t push him off. His pace was monstrous, and you couldn’t help but feel jealous of all the other women he’s been with. The pleasure was absolutely heavenly.

He reached the deepest parts of you, places you didn’t know existed, and he was barely halfway in.

“It barely fits.” He groaned, watching the vulgar entrance of his fat cock stuffing your tight, little cunt.

His hair and forehead was matted with sweat. He looked down, quietly admiring your fucked out face with an almost evil, shit-eating grin. Your eyes were rolled back, and your tongue was slowly making its way past your lips. He let his chain dangle in your face as he focused on making you cum, hips thrusting in and out, thirsty for your essence. You clench around him at the feeling of the cold metal, earning a growl from his throat. You reached behind him to claw uselessly at his shoulders, preening.

He let go of your throat, trading it for pushing your knees to your ears. In this position, he saw everything. He bit into your ankle, and then your toe, his eyes never leaving your face.

“Look at me when I’m fucking you, slut.” You struggled to meet his eyes. He was practically making out with your legs. With nothing of him to hold, you could only grab your breasts to massage them.

“So fucking dirty. Look at you, pulling me in with this pretty cunt. Fuckin’ brat.” He gently slapped your cheek, coaxing you out of your daze.

He flips you to your side and comes behind you, using one arm to pull your leg up, the other coiling around your neck in a headlock.

God, you were facing your mirror.

“Watch me make you cum, (Name).”

“Want you to cum first.” You mumbled, head sinking deeper into your pillows.

“There’s no fucking way.” He said with a slap to your left breast. He looked down at your connected parts.

“Little girl taking big things.” He mumbled offhandedly, irises expanding. He could feel his balls twitch, begging for release, but he couldn’t give you the satisfaction of orgasming before you. He couldn’t pussy out of watching you come undone first. “My.” Thrust. “Kind of.” Thrust. “Woman.”

His hips slowed to a grinding motion, pelvis right against your pulsating clit, as he cupped your jaw and turned it. “Open.” He commanded, thumb pressed against your bottom lip. The cold metal of his rings pulled you out of your haze and you obliged, watching him waft up a glob of spit and depositing it into your waiting mouth. You swallowed, eyes watery.

“Say thank you, brat.”

“Thank you so so so so much.” You whimpered, reaching for him. He kissed you feverishly, eyes still open as you sucked and nipped at his tongue and lips.

You were whiny and breathless as he resumed his harsh pace, oscillating his hips at the perfect angle.

Your toes curled at the sight. He remained relatively quiet, except for the occasional grunts and dirty talk, too enthralled at the idea of making you cum for the first.

“Fuck, get on your knees. Need to see it from the back.” He looms over you, taking your earlobe into his mouth as he encased you in his arms and resumed his harsh pace.

You ran a hand over his lower stomach, chiseled to the gods, and traced the veins that lead to his cock. He tilted his head back, enjoying your soft touch. When you touched his iliac furrow, he shuddered.

You could feel it— your approaching orgasm. It was coming fast, and your toes curled in anxiety. It felt like it was going to be too much to handle.

“I can’t, Jungkook.”

“Hm?”

“It’s too much.”

“You can handle it, brat.” He said, fucking you faster. You yelped at the sudden change. “You were right. You were made to take my cock. Such a tiny thing. . . I shouldn’t have even passed your pretty lips.”

“So vulgar.” You mumbled, blinking back your tears of ecstasy.

“Cum, woman.”

“Can’t.”

“You can, petal. You’re taking me so well. There’s nothing you can’t do, hm?” He pressed his lips against your cheek, and then to your ear. He bit into it, suppressing his own sounds of enjoyment. Th sweetness of his gestures seemed to spur you on, just like he wanted. “Gonna cum, Kookie.”

“Fuuuuuck, me too.” He groaned. The bed was practically falling apart as he fucked into you, balls slapping against your pussy.

“Cum inside, please.”

“Gonna give you a fuckin’ kid if I do.”

“Please.”

“Filthy. Fuckin’ filthy. Make me cum then, brat.”

And with that, you came. Your insides gripped his cock painfully tight, so tight that he couldn’t even get another thrust in. You milked his cock for everything he was worth, convulsing around him like a fucking vibrator. You were drooling as you reached up to bite his neck, leaving a not-so subtle mark. He let you claim him for only moment. It was your reward for cumming so perfectly.

“Shit.” He said, watching you arch your back as you laid back down. So fuckin’ pretty. With a few more strokes, he came, painting your insides white with his seed. You could feel the spurts of cum, felt it inflate your stomach at the thickness, and it all but made you feel even more horny. You wanted nothing else but to bear his children. To be bred by that beast of a man. Semen eased out of your hole when he pulled out, but all he did was plug it back in with his fingers.

He coaxed another handful of orgasms from you that night. He didn’t give you a break for the next couple of hours, and in the morning he let you go with a bouquet of insults, marks you couldn’t hide, and a tremble in your walk.

You trudged out the door and into car, ready to receive an earful from him.

You must’ve left a long lasting impression on him, because he continued to call you at the wee hours of the night, asking for a quick fuck. You hastily agreed, hoping these hangouts would turn into dates.

Oh, how you were terribly wrong.

He had been out and about sleeping with beautiful, smart, and experienced predator hybrids.

“Are you okay?” A voice rang through the room, pulling you out of your trance. You looked up, meeting the eyes of none other than Cha Eunwoo, Jungkook’s vice-captain, the student body president, and your astronomy classmate. He was a handsome cheetah hybrid with his toothy grin, sweet demeanor, and adorable sweater vests.

You wish you had fallen for him instead.

“Yeah,” you sniffled, “I’m fine.”

“You don’t look too fine.” He chuckled, and you did too. “I heard about what happened. I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve that.” Eunwoo said, softly shutting the door. He sat down next to you, and offered you his handkerchief.

“I thought things would be different.”

“I know, sweetheart.” He whispered, touching your shoulder. “If it makes you feel better, you’re beyond beautiful. Any guy would be lucky to have you.”

“Thank you, Eunwoo.”

“It’s no problem, (Name). Let everything out. I’m here to listen.”

“It’s just that . . . I chased after him for so long. I don’t know anything else but chasing.”

“What if I chased after you?” He replied, tucking a strand of loose hair behind your ear. “What if I showed you what’s beyond chasing?”

“W-What?”

“I know you’re vulnerable and hurt right now, but I feel like I’ll never have another chance to tell you how I feel. Just know I’m not using this situation to manipulate you into anything.” He breathed in.

“I’ve always liked you, (Name), even back in high school. You were so sweet, and passionate about what you loved, whether it was Jungkook, or astronomy. I admired that from afar, since I knew your heart already belonged to someone. When you helped me with my physics homework, I fell for you even harder.” He confessed with a wistful look. “I wish Jungkook knew how much you meant to him. It wasn’t about his appearance, or his status. It was him. Everything about him, you embraced, even his flaws.”

He looked at you, cyan eyes sparking with hope. “I hope you’ll give me the chance to pursue you. I want to help you forget your pain.”

“Eunwoo. . . I don’t want you to feel like a rebound.”

“Of course you aren’t. I want this, and I don’t expect you to give up your feelings for him instantly.”

You thought about it. This could be your chance to forget, to build a relationship with someone who actually reciprocates your feelings. You were given the chance to feel what true love finally feels like, and you would be dumb to give up this chance.

He was going to give you what you longed for from Jungkook. He was looking at you the way you looked at Jungkook.

“Okay, Eunwoo. You can try, but I can’t promise anything.” Within seconds, Eunwoo had pulled you into a tight embrace. You basked in the scent of cedar wood and cocoa. Despite it being foreign, you felt comfortable in his presence. He picked you off the floor and twirled you around, earning a soft squeak from you.

“Thank you, sweetheart. You won’t regret this.”

Days went by and Jungkook didn’t hear from you at all. He had checked your favorite university cafe, that spot you liked to study at in the library, and even waited at the door of one of your classes. You were nowhere to be seen, and Jungkook was getting severely annoyed. It wasn’t the first time he had said something mean, so why were you hiding now?

He hadn’t had a good fuck in a minute, the last one being you. You, the woman he seemed to despise the most, making him cum the hardest and quickest he’s ever had. Even the sheer thought of you, sprawled over his bed or leaning over his desk, dripping from his cream pie, has him popping a boner in the middle of class.

He couldn’t even cum properly without thinking about you. Balls deep in the captain of the volleyball team, and all he could think of was you.

Things wouldn’t change over a single argument, right? Similar things have happened before, but you always crawled back after a few pretty texts of “I miss your cooking” or “I miss that pretty cunt sitting on my face.”

You would be back soon, he was sure of that. With that thought in mind, he made his way to your next class, hoping to catch you leaving the room. He’d give you a public kiss, even wrap an arm around you. That’d satisfy you enough, right?

Right?

“Is Eunwoo and (Name) dating?”

His ears perked up. What?

“I saw them holding hands. He was holding her satchel and textbooks.”

“I guess she’s over her crush. Good for her.”

“Finally finding her self worth after all these years? It’s not something to be proud of.”

He turned to stare at the female gossipers that loitered around a vending machine. Surely they meant someone else. Not (Name). Not his (Name). She would never leave over some pathetic argument.

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. That was impossible.

When you didn’t come out, he strolled to the cafeteria to meet his friends. As usual, Taehyung and Jimin were bickering. Something, or someone, was missing in the equation, but he didn’t dwell too much on it.

“He doesn’t know, does he?” Jimin whispered to the bear hybrid.

“There’s no way he doesn’t know. The entire law department knows! Even the engineering department! And the bio—“

“Shut up, he’s coming!”

Jungkook sat down, quizzically staring at the pair. They awkwardly smiled at him, and quickly shut their conversation down.

“Wow, this must be the longest (Name)’s been away from you.” Taehyung drawled, side eyeing Jimin.

“She looked really hurt that day. You were out of bounds with that one.” Jimin added, slurping his juice box.

“Don’t you think I know that? She’ll get over it with some sweet little words.”

“Hm.”

“She’s so obsessed with my health. She can’t go a week without whipping me something to try in the name of her ‘proving herself worthy to be my girlfriend’ bullshit.”

“Then why isn’t she coming over? She’s right over there.” Jimin said, pointing his fork at the direction behind him. Jungkook whirled around. He must be playing a prank on him. He could smell your overwhelming scent from a mile away.

Sure enough, there you were, sitting right next to fucking Cha Eunwoo. You were drenched in Eunwoo’s pheromones, it was no wonder why he couldn’t smell you. The can of soda that was in Jungkook’s palm was crushed within seconds.

Eunwoo laughed at one of your jokes and softly petted your hair, easing the morning licks that seem to always pop up after a good night’s rest. He scratched the base of your ears, and your left foot began to endearingly thump with glee.

Jungkook glowered at the sight. Why the fuck was that cheetah hybrid touching what’s his?

“Oi, looks like (Name)’s found her new object of affection.” Taehyung whistled, turning to look at Jungkook. “Good for her. . . and for you, man. She’s finally off your back, just like you wanted.”

“Yeah, I guess she is.” Jimin cocked a brow at the boy. Liquid continued to ooze from the crushed soda can, and Jimin could only shake his head.

“I don’t give a fuck. She was annoying in bed anyways. So loud.” Of course, that was a big fat lie. You were the most enjoyable to be with. (And if anything, he was the most vocal with you.)

“Whatever you say.” Jimin retorts, and that was the end of the conversation.

Jungkook couldn’t help but send a quick glance your way. You looked so happy, as if that argument never happened. Were you ever really in love with him to begin with?

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed in on the box that sat between you. You were saying someone as you eased a roll into Eunwoo’s mouth. He bit your finger playfully as he pulled back, making you blush like crazy. He wanted to strangle Eunwoo, but he also wanted to laugh.

You were never in love with him. You just wanted to see what the fuss his dick was about. If you were truly in love with him, you wouldn’t have given up so easily.

But why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like heaven ripped half of his soul away from him?

For fuck’s didn’t need you. He never needed you.

He quickly pulled out his phone, and his finger hovered over Karina’s recent message that he left on delivered.

Are you busy?

Three dots. And then;

Never for you.

Two weeks goes by. You spent your days mostly being whisked away by Eunwoo, who took you to fancy dinners, movies, and museums. Yet, every time you were alone in your thoughts, you thought of him. Jungkook. His touch, his warm scent, his smirk whenever he was around his friends, and his smile, the one that showed every time he talked about his grandmother. You missed all of that.

You missed all of him.

Jungkook and Karina’s newfound monogamous relationship spread through the campus fairly quickly. Of course, you played off your true reactions when Nayeon from your literature class asked you how you felt about it.

“I’m happy for him. He deserves someone good by his side after everything he’s been through.”

(Nayeon had given you a pitiful look after hearing your response. She must’ve thought that you were spiraling.

You were.)

Despite him giving Karina the one position you longed for, you were actually happy for him. You didn’t lie when you said that he deserved it — deserved a pretty and accomplished predator hybrid that could proudly stand by his side as an equal.

It took you awhile to come to terms with it, but you came to realize it wouldn’t work anyways. He was a panther, the heir to the strongest clan in the world. He had beauty, wealth, education. . . he had a lifestyle that couldn’t work with her’s; a middle class prey hybrid who can barely make rent.

Eunwoo didn’t allow you to dwell on it, and soon, your entire schedule was filled with him, classes, and your four best friends, Hoseok, Hoa, Momo, and Yoongi.

This feeling of knowing what laid ahead was comforting. You were going to graduate, date Eunwoo, and live out your days doing what you loved.

“Don’t worry princess, I’m always going to be here for you.” Eunwoo said, pressing his lips against your hair.

You were so used to Jungkook’s sarcastic pet names that being called princess or sweetheart made your head spin. It was welcomed, though. Bunnies needed love and everlasting attention, and Eunwoo was gladly offering it.

Back at your shared apartment, you checked your outfit one last time. A sundress, one that complimented your curves and brightened up your skin. You slipped on your glasses and tote bag, ready to head out. Before you could leave, you stopped to touch the photo of you and Jungkook at the sweet age of seven. There were actually many photos, some with friends, some alone, and they were mostly from ten years ago. One of them was from five years ago. It was a picture of Jungkook sitting on the edge of a secret hilltop that overlooked the city. The sun had been setting, and you took a snap of him admiring the rare sight.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it? I used to come here a lot whenever my grandmother worked at the planetarium.” He had said, pointing at the array of colors that coated the evening sky.

You nodded absentmindedly, but you weren’t looking at the view. Long eyelashes, a few pimples and scars, and chapped lips. Cherub skin, a little fat in his cheeks that later faded as he aged, and sparkly gray eyes. You were looking at him, and all that he was.

This was who you loved. God, how could you not love someone so pure?

He grew muscle and lost his baby fat, but he never lost those large grey-amber eyes, ones that seemed to hold entire galaxies in them.

“Yeah. It’s beautiful.” You murmured.

You blinked, and turned away from the picture frame. You didn’t want to immerse yourself in a fantasy that you could never relive.

Once you left your apartment, it only took twenty minutes to reach the university. You bounced down the halls in pure excitement. Eunwoo was taking you to an exhibit that featured space stones!

In your excitement, you had accidentally bumped into someone.

“Watch where you’re going!”

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t see you there.” You bowed respectfully, and turned to keep going. A hand curled around your wrist and stopped you from going. You looked up, only to see Karina’s cat-like eyes. She sneered.

“Well, if it isn’t Jungkook’s old clingy bunny experiment. (Name), wasn’t it?”

“Look, I really have to go.” You casted your eyes down. “Again, I’m sorry for all the trouble—”

“Look at me when I’m talking to you, prey.” Karina screamed, pushing you against a bulletin board. You gulped, but your face remained brave.

“What do you want from me?”

“He’s probably told you this, but leave him alone. Stay far, far away from him. He’s mine now, and he told me to tell you that. You were his plaything, and I’m his girlfriend. As it should be.”

She was antagonizing you, that much you could tell.

“I wasn’t planning to go near him again. You’re right, he’s yours and I can respect that.”

“Panther hybrids aren’t meant to be with puny prey hybrids, (Name), and I’m glad you finally put a stop to your delusions.”

Your blood ran hot at her comment. With a sprout of strength you never thought you had, you twisted away from her grasp and pushed her into the wall that you were pressed against seconds before.

“You already have him, so why are you being so rude? I’ve never done anything to you—!”

“What the hell is going on, (Name)?” You turned, meeting Jungkook’s red eyes. You instantly submitted under his harsh gaze, knees failing at the sudden wave of nausea. He was going to make you go into heat if he didn’t stop. He pushed you away from Karina, making you trip and collapse onto the floor with a thud. You gasped as the pain rushed through your spine. You attempted to sit up, but the pain was too much.

Jimin and Taehyung quickly came to your aid. You winced at the contact, pulling away from their touch. There were too many predators surrounding you, and with Jungkook’s pheromones, it made you feel even more unsafe. They attempted to sooth you with words of encouragement as they lifted you to your feet.

Karina was sobbing into Jungkook’s chest as she pointed at you.

“She attacked me when I told her that I loved you!” Jungkook turned to reprimand you, but Jimin stood in front of you, baring his fangs. He was beyond tired of watching you get insulted for nothing.

“You attacked her over something so pathetic? Jesus, (Name). I knew you were insane, but I didn’t think you were violent.”

“You know (Name) wouldn’t attack her over that! She obviously provoked her.” Taehyung said, coming to your defense.

“She’s so fucking obsessed with me, I wouldn’t be surprised if she did this out of jealousy.” He spat. Your temper returned tenfold, and you angrily limped toward him, pushing past Jimin.

“Don’t you start fake crying, (Name). I’m not falling for your shit, anymore.” Jungkook said sarcastically. “Just drop the shitty innocent act.”

You slap him. Across the face.

“Fuck. You.” You heaved. Your throat fucking burned. You weren’t used to raising your voice. “I’ve been in love with you for more than a decade, Jungkook. Is this some kind of sick joke? I’ve taken care of you, looked after you, loved you even when you didn’t want to have anything to do with me. It’s fine that you don’t reciprocate my feelings, I respect that, but for you to undermine my love for you as some obsession is fucking low. I’ve left you alone, and you continue to insult me, and for what? I’m sorry that I was annoying. I’m sorry that I was clingy. I’m sorry that I can never live up to your stupid standards. I’m sorry that sex with me wasn’t up to your standards, so you had to find pleasure in other experienced women. I’m so sorry for wasting your time, and I’m sorry for loving a predator like you, even when you told me to stop. I’m happy for you! You deserve to find love with someone who’s your equal, so why can’t you be happy for me, just this once? Why can’t you see that I’m still trying for you, even when you hate me?”

You were full blown sobbing now, and Jungkook couldn’t help but look at you in pure agony. He could see and feel your pain, like he’s never had before. It was as if something clicked inside his soul, and he had come to the realization that you weren’t just a fuck to him. No, you were more than that, he could physically feel it. As if he was possessed, he pushed Karina off of him and slowly reached for you. It was as if his instincts were telling him to comfort his mate. You backed away and shook your head. “Don’t touch me. I’ll dirty you. I’m just a brat, right? A filthy slut who doesn’t deserve your love. Who can never amount to anything to you and your family.” You covered your face and turned away. You couldn’t handle anymore embarrassment.

“No, (Name). I didn’t think. . .” Jungkook tried. Why weren’t his words forming right?

“(Name)? Are you okay?” asked Eunwoo from across the hall. He hastily rushed towards you. You were supposed to meet him at the campus parking lot, but you weren’t there and it was about fifteen minutes before the exhibit.

You cried out, reaching for him. He pulled you into his arms protectively. You snuggled into his hold, using his scent as a way to calm yourself. Jungkook watched, his soul crushed to oblivion.

“Please take me home.” You mumbled in tears. “Everything hurts.”

“Of course, sweetheart. Give me your bag.” Eunwoo shrugged your bag off and onto his shoulder. He lifted you off your feet and gave you a one look over before making his way towards the exit. Jungkook stood there, drowning in pure regret. There was no way he could fix this.

“I’ll take you to the clinic first, okay?” Eunwoo murmured as he tucked you into the passenger seat.

“Mhm.” You mumbled, already exhausted.

“Sh, sleep. I’ll wake you when we’re there.”

“Thank-you, Eunwoo.”

“Of course, princess.”

“I think. . . I can finally look at you now, Woo.” You said as you dozed off. “In the way you want me to.” Eunwoo paused before smiling, opening his car door.

“I’m glad, (Name).” His eyes flashed red. “I’m so, so glad.”

That night, you nestled into bed after applying some ointment onto your bruise. It would be hard to walk for a couple of days, but your boyfriend would be there to support you every step of the way.

Your phone buzzed with several messages, but you ignored it, thinking it was your group chat. You groaned when it continued to insistently vibrate. After a few moments, you peeled it off your bedside table.

It was Jungkook, of all people.

(Name)?

Can we talk?

I want to fix things.

I miss you. A lot.

Please.

I promisr I’lk changw.

I won’t pusd yoi away amymorw.

I can’t di this. Pleasr.

Mert mw on our hill, plwese?

(Name).

I thonk I luvb you.

Talj to me. Pleasw.

Jungkook took another swig of his vodka as he laid sprawled on the grass, on top of a very special hill. You weren’t replying, and as the minutes passed by, he was drowning himself with more alcohol. He wanted to beg on his knees for your forgiveness. He’d give everything to finally treat you right. To stop fighting the attraction.

He tried to text you again, fingers messily typing against the screen. He could barely make out what he was typing before he pressed send.

I’d leavw everythinf behind four yoy, (Name).

The message didn’t go through, and his heart dropped.

In the end, your tears dried out.

You had blocked him.

#jungkook #jungkook smut #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #bts jungkook #bts #bts angst #kim taehyung #park jimin #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #jung hoseok #min yoongi #jeon jungkook #bts smut #bts fanfic #bts recs

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hoseok666 · 2 years

Text

and they were roommates - ch. 6

➸ pairings: jungkook x reader/taehyung x reader ➸ genre: strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, eventual angst, eventual smut, fluff, pretty much everything . college!jungkook AU, college!taehyung AU, tsundere! jungkook, warm personality taehyung, slowburn

➸ word count: 17.9k (yeEHHHH ALL FOR YOU GUYS) ➸ chapter summary: the one where everyone is oblivious as fuck to their own feelings ➸ chapter warnings: small mention/asking of domestic abuse, smut (finally), lots of y/n crying :(, asshole jungkook, stupid jungkook, stupid taehyung, adorable taehyung, slight y/n x namjoon 👀 ➸ series summary: it all started with a rejection from your longtime crush, jeon jungkook. you decided to confess to him on your last day of high school. after a harsh rejection and a rough summer dealing with the heartbreak, you were starting anew once your freshman year of college came. you were going to be sharing an apartment with two other roommates that you don’t even know. what a surprise you’re going to be in for once you find out it’s the one and only: jeon jungkook and kim taehyung.

ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | ch. 6

Monday morning rolls around, kicking off the final week of October. Halloween was just days away from now and you could practically taste all of the sugar from the candy and feel all of the cavities forming in your teeth once you, Taehyung, and Jimin binge on all of the Halloween candies while watching spooky movies that you all plan on watching together.

You were starting off your Monday with Hoseok and Yoongi, while drinking your pumpkin spiced lattes together outside, sitting on a table that was in front of your local Starbucks. “You haven’t truly experienced autumn if we haven’t tried Starbucks pumpkin spiced lattes at least once.” Hoseok took a long sip of his hot drink. “Shut up, Hoseok.” Yoongi groaned, rubbing his eyes. You snorted at that which caused Hoseok to look at you. “Why are you laughing? Isn’t this your first time having anything that wasn’t an iced mocha ever since the day we’ve met?” You rolled your eyes at Hoseok’s retaliation and just silently sipped on your latte.

“So how did the two of you spend your weekend? Other than leaving me alone so that the two of you could play videogames together til dawn.”

Yoongi smirked at you. “You’re just jealous that you have no one else to play video games with like we do.” You scoffed. “I don’t even like playing videogames in the first place!” you shot back, making Yoongi laugh at your annoyance with him. “We basically spent all Friday night chilling inside the PC cafe. Saturday and Sunday, I was just studying and working on my internships.” Yoongi finally answered.

“You’re such a nerd, Yoongi. So what I’m hearing is that all you did was play computer games and homework?” you teased, making Yoongi roll his eyes at you as his response. “I’ve been job-hunting all weekend. Literally, why is nobody hiring right now? We’re two months away from Christmas season! They should be hiring for seasonals or whatever.” Hoseok pouted and sighed. You perked up at the idea of looking for a job. “What kind of places have you been applying at?” You asked him.

“I’ve heard that servers make pretty good money, especially if they work at a really demanding and popular restaurant. They can practically pay off rent in Seoul from the amount of tips that they make.” Suddenly, Hoseok’s eyes grew into saucers. “I’m so dumb! Doesn’t your friend Taehyung work at that cafe down the street from campus? Do you think he could hook me up with a job?” Hoseok grabbed onto your arm and looked at you with his pleading eyes.

You shrugged and gave him an uneasy look. “I mean I could try and ask. Taehyung does make a lot of money from that job. It’s probably because he has such a suitable personality as a server.” You smiled. Hoseok gave you a teasing glare and nudged on your arm. “Look at you talking about his ‘suitable personality’. Are you falling in love with him yet?” You snorted at Hoseok’s crazy words and shook your head. “What? I’m just saying how Taehyung has the right personality to be a server! He knows how to make people feel comfortable and he’s genuinely a people person.” You went on to continue complimenting Taehyung’s personality. You certainly weren’t helping yourself to not make it seem as if you were drooling over him.

Hoseok’s teasing glare deepened and he looked at you with interest. “I see that you’ve certainly gotten to know his personality a lot more recently. What did you two do this weekend?” Hoseok wriggled his brows, causing Yoongi to playfully slap his chest.

You laughed nervously. “Hoseok, nothing went down between us. All we did was just hang out a lot with Jungkook and Jimin at this amusement park or whatever.” you said, nonchalantly. Yoongi and Hoseok’s eyebrows furrowed at the unfamiliar name of ‘Jimin’.

“Who’s Jimin?” Yoongi asked. “Oh! I forgot to mention about him to you guys. Jimin’s like Tae’s and Jungkook’s childhood best friend who’s gonna be staying with us for awhile. He just moved up here to Seoul from Busan.” you explained to the confused couple. Yoongi snickered at you, causing you to give him a bewildered look. “What?”

“You’re surrounded by so much dick, ___. How have you not gone feral yet?” Hoseok nodded in agreement with his boyfriend. You scoffed and let out a laugh. “Why does everyone expect sex to happen if a girl and a guy are living together? We’re literally all just friends!” You defended yourself. “Oh yeah? Then show us a picture of him.” Hoseok demanded. You sighed but obliged to his request either way. You went to Jimin’s Instagram profile that you had just recently began following a few days ago (due to him forcing you to follow him on all of his social medias) and scrolled to find his most recent selfie. Finally, you had found one.

“Here”.

It was a picture of Jimin laying down on a bed, with a dog sitting right next to him. It was taken back when he had been living in Busan. You shoved the picture in front of your two friends. Yoongi and Hoseok’s eyes immediately widened. “___! Are you stupid? He’s hot.” Hoseok exclaimed. You rolled your eyes at him and his words. “I just met him, Hoseok. I’m not the kind of girl that would immediately suck a guy’s dick just because he’s hot. He has to deserve it.” you winked at them, causing both boys to laugh at you. “Stop playing, __. You’re not the type to suck dick at all.” Yoongi laughed. “Maybe I’ve already sucked dick before; you’ll never know.” Hoseok squealed at your words and playfully slapped yout arms. “So? You never told us what went down during your weekend with your three boyfriends. How’d everything go?” Hoseok tried to re-focus on the previous conversation.

“Nothing, Hoseok. The day Jimin had arrived, the boys went off to go clubbing, remember? That was when I called you to come over. And then, suddenly Jungkook ended up coming back home and--,” you stopped yourself from continuing the sentence. You were unsure if you should tell Hoseok and Yoongi about the intimate conversation that you and Jungkook had shared that night. “He came back home and what?” Hoseok urged you continue.

“Um. He came back home and..we sort of just talked. Like regular human beings. We didn’t fight or anything.” You quickly summarized for them, not wanting to say a single personal detail. “What do you mean by ‘talked’?” Yoongi asked, leaning forward to listen to you intently. You shrugged. “I don’t know, we sort of like talked about some personal things going on in our lives and I gave him advice and all that. It felt really intimate.” You admitted, looking back into a distance as you reminisced those moments between you and Jungkook. Yoongi began to smile approvingly. “That makes me glad. I’m glad Jungkook finally found someone that he can act like an actual human being with emotions with.”

Hoseok laughed at him. “You act like you show emotions too, Yoongs. Both you and Jungkook act like you’re some dull, emotionless robots.” You and Hoseok laughed together as you nodded in agreement with his words. Yoongi rolled his eyes at that and ignored his boyfriend’s mocking words. “Anyways, I’m glad that Jungkook was able to open up with you about whatever was going through that little intelligent head of his. I don’t really wanna know what exactly he said to you or whatever, but I am happy to know that he’s let off some stress. The kid’s been acting so tense whenever we would be working together.” Yoongi informed you, a melancholy facial expression had taken over his pale face.

You felt at peace after hearing what Yoongi had to say about Jungkook. Yoongi was right. During the amusement park day, it seemed like as if Jungkook had let loose of whatever stress was eating him up alive and he allowed his outdoor surroundings to take over his body. You began to think if maybe his mother and his choice of major were the main causes of his previous stress.

“So, you didn’t bond more with Taehyung during the past weekend? You bonded with the other one instead? Disappointing.” Hoseok tsked. You gaped your mouth open at that. “Hoseok! Why are you trying so hard to force some unrealistic and nonexistent romance between me and Taehyung?”

Hoseok scoffs at you, annoyed with your obliviousness. “How have you not felt some sort of connection between the two of you? You guys are practically Han and Anna from Frozen; always finishing each other’s sentences and get excited over the littlest things and you both enjoy each other’s company like crazy.”

“But didn’t Han eventually betray Anna in the end?” Yoongi mentioned. Hoseok took a moment to reroute his thoughts and think of another analogy to compare the relationship between you and Taehyung. His silence had you quietly snickering, feeling satisfied that Hoseok had finally shut up about you and Taehyung for once.

“Whatever. You guys know what I mean. To sum it up, I’m Team Taehyung.” “What is this, Twilight? Are we seriously gonna battle over who ___ is best with?” Yoongi complained. “Yes.” Hoseok said. Yoongi sighed and softly chewed on his lower lip. “Well in that case, I’m Team Jungkook.”

You were cringing hard at these words. The fact that both boys are fighting over which guy should be the one for you was embarrassing and revolting at the same time. But that doesn’t mean that you weren’t completely against the fact that Yoongi is rooting for you and Jungkook. Maybe he actually sees something between the two of you. Maybe it isn’t just all in your head for once.

“Jungkook? Why ___ and Jungkook?” Hoseok recoiled. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Hobi, but the kid’s a complete dickhead. He needs someone sweet and soft like ___ to completely neutralize his asshole-ness. Besides, the best couples are the ones who challenge each other to grow to be their best selves. I think he and ___ would be that kind of couple who aren’t gonna be afraid to call each other out on their bullshit and they’ll help each other grow into the best versions of themselves. Someone who can support and love you, especially the ugly side of you. The fact that ___ is still interacting and living with a hardheaded guy like Jungkook just shows that she’s a capable candidate to handle him.” Yoongi explained thoroughly.

Hoseok scoffed. “Capable candidate? What is this, The Bachelors or something?” you teased, finally speaking up. Yoongi’s words had your heart racing at about a thousands miles per second. Was what he said true? Are you someone who he seems is able to handle Jungkook at his good and bad? Is Jungkook the type of guy to be able to handle your worse and your best self? Would the two of you be the kind of couple that will uplift each other and allow each other to challenge yourselves? Is that even an important component in order to be in a successfully long-lasting relationship? Why is love so hard? Why is liking someone like Jungkook so hard?

“Okay well, I gotta go. I have a class that starts in about ten minutes.” you lied. You wanted to find a way to leave this conversation and leave the two boys who won’t stop squabbling over your oh-so-dramatic love life.

“You want us to walk you to class?” Yoongi asked. Your heart always warmed everytime Yoongi offered to walk with you to a certain place. “I’ll be fine, Yoongi. Thanks though.” you gave him a sincere smile and waved goodbye to the couple before heading off to your next “class” aka home.

. . .

You were welcomed to an empty apartment. An extremely messy and empty apartment. Having Jimin here was great and all, but he wasn’t exactly the cleanest guy around. He had spare boxers lying all over the living room, along with some dirty socks and some shirts that were thrown around. You assumed that Jimin was probably busy with something today and rushed to find an outfit -- which was probably why the living room looked as if it was just hit from a tornado full of clothes.

Taehyung was at work and Jungkook must be probably out in his classes as well. You had the entire apartment to yourself and it felt good.

You went off to enter your room and sunk yourself into the soft sheets of your bed. You were bored. There was nothing to do right now. Of course, you had some homework assignments to complete or whatever but they weren’t due for another few days and you wanted to rest for a bit rather than force yourself to work ahead.

Suddenly, a memory of the night when Jungkook had come home drunk from the club ascended back into your mind. It seems as if that night was on a constant loop inside your head. You couldn’t stop thinking about how close you were next to his warm body and how you got to see his soft and vulnerable side. It was such an intimate moment and you couldn't help but to crave more of those moments with Jungkook even more. You wanted to know Jungkook better than you knew yourself. You wanted to be the shoulder he could cry on. You wanted to be the first person Jungkook could come to whenever he had good news, bad news, and sad news. You wanted to be his everything. You wanted Jungkook, so badly.

You groaned in annoyance at the fact that your feelings for him have only just grown to be stronger rather than going away. Your stomach was flipping and flopping, heart was pounding hard against your chest and your breathing had gotten a lot heavier.

You decided to ignore these feelings for him by reaching towards to your laptop and searched up some of the majors that Konkuk had provided, to gain some new ideas of what you could major in.

A part of you didn’t really want to admit it but you had always fantasized the idea of you becoming a screenwriter. You’ve always loved writing as a child and as a young teenager growing up. You haven’t written any sort of fictional or non fictional work in years and you weren’t really too confident with your writing anymore, due to the fact that it’s probably really rusty right now.

You went onto the Konkuk University official website to search up what kind of majors or departments are offering the kinds of writing classes that you’re interested in.

In all honesty, Konkuk wasn’t really the best school to attend to if you’re focusing onto the Liberal Arts. Konkuk was morley focused onto their law program and sciences. The best schools for the film and the arts were SKY Institutions -- Seoul University, Korea University, and Yonsei University -- or the Korean Academy of Film Arts but how the hell were you gonna even allow yourself to apply to such prestigious universities like that? Especially with your mediocre grades from high school.

However, you came across to a certain college that Konkuk offered: The Undergraduate College of Art and Design.

They had a specific department for film and animation. They had its own department for animation as well? Of course, Jungkook was the very first person that you had immediately thought of. Your heart suddenly began to race again: What if Jungkook and I have to take the same classes together?

You read through the instructions of how to apply for the department as thoroughly as you could. You have to have at least a 3.0 GPA average in order to transfer into this department by the time your sophomore year rolls around, along with two professor recommendations. You still have time, right? It was only October.

You reached out for a notebook and wrote a game plan of how to get into this amazing department that was clearly made for you and Jungkook. First, you have to start creating connections with all of your professors -- even the ones you don’t like. Then, you need to make sure that you don’t ever get less than a C on any important exams, quizzes, or quizzes. Fuck, maybe not even less than a B-? After that, you need to find a way to get Jungkook to join this department too so that he could finally achieve his lifelong dream of being an animator.

Although these steps seem to be simple, it truly does require an awful amount of work and effort. Especially with the studying part.

You heard the chime of your apartment door being opened and some heavy sounding footsteps had echoed through. You heard the familiar sound of an exasperated sigh and immediately knew that it was Jungkook who had come home.

You got up from your bed and headed towards to the door. “Hey.” you greeted him. He looked up at you, with a slightly surprised look in his eyes. He had music blaring from his headphones. He reached into his phone that was inside a pocket and quickly paused the music. “Hey.” he replied back, taking out his headphones from his ears.

“You’re home.” you awkwardly say, stating the obvious. Jungkook gave you an annoyed glare and headed towards to the kitchen, immediately raiding the fridge already. He reached inside and grabbed a small can of iced espresso. He indulged the beverage within seconds.

“Wow, someone’s thirsty.” you nervously joke. Jungkook looks at you, examining you and your words. “Why are you being so odd right now?” he asks nonchalantly.

“How am I being cringey?” you furrow your brows at him. “You’re trying to crack some jokes and unsurprisingly, they aren’t really working out for you, are they?” he cocked his head to the side. You scoff at him as a response, and sat down on one of the bar stools that was by the countertop.

“So, how was your day?”

Jungkook wasn’t a fan of small talk. In fact, he wasn’t a fan of any kind of talking at all. He loves silence and loves not interacting with people. He would rather slam his tongue on a car door rather to have this agonizing conversation with you right now.

“It was fine. How was yours?” he asked in an uninterested tone.

“Eh, it was okay.” Jungkook nodded at that, not knowing what to say to such a dry response. “Is there a reason why you’re trying to make small talk right now?” he asked.

You shrugged in response.”What? I’m not allowed to have some chit-chat time with my own roommate?” Jungkook had a feeling that you were hiding something from him. He could tell by how tense your facial expressions were and by how tense your shoulders were as well. Your lips were quivering out of apprehensiveness and you weren’t able to stop the constant tapping of your fingertips against the countertop table.

“Did you break something that belonged to me?” he asked you. A confused look was written across your face. “No? I just said that I’m trying to make some conversation with you.”

Jungkook huffed out a soft sigh. “Well, to be honest, I don’t really want to be having small talk with you right now. I’m not really that kind of person.” He informed you. Normally, what he said would have offended you greatly but your heart was soaring because Jungkook just shared with you about a personal information of his. He told you something interesting about him for once. He doesn’t like small talk. Noted.

“Great, because neither do I!” you admit back, nervously. Jungkook was growing to be even more bothered with you and with this conversation. He was getting ready to just excuse himself and hide inside his room but you had beaten him to it.

“Have you thought of switching to being an animation major yet?” you asked abruptly.

Jungkook shrugged as a response. “Well, you should consider joining this department that Konkuk offers: the department of film and animation. It’s a really good program!” you suggested him, flashing a grin. He couldn’t help but to laugh at your nervous stance. So this was what you were so nervous to ask me. He laughed to himself some more. He took another glance at your anxious body language; all because you were just scared to talk to him about this program. Cute.

“I’ve already heard of it. I researched it too and all that. It’s decent enough for me to get in easily. I don’t know about you, though,” he teased you, causing you to flash him a scowl. “How did you even know about that program?” Jungkook asked, taking another sip of his coffee.

“I’m just trying to find some majors or classes that I can take for a certain subject that I’m interested in, that’s all.” Jungkook gave you a suspicious look. It wasn’t that he cared enough to wonder what major you were thinking of pursuing in, but he was confused as to why you would even try to hide it in the first place.

“Just tell me what major you’re thinking of, ___.” Jungkook rushed.

You sighed, unsure and nervous of telling him. It’s nothing to be embarrassed of, right? Jungkook surly wasn’t afraid to tell you his thoughts too. It was the least that you could do, right?

“I want to do screenwriting.”

Jungkook stared at you, unable to say anything. He couldn’t wrap his head around the idea of you writing television shows or movies or just writing anything at all, period. You’ve never shown or hinted any signs of you having an interest in writing or creating scripts.

“Screenwriting.” is all he says to you. You nod your head. “Do you even write?” he asks suddenly.

“I-I mean, I used to do it a lot when I was younger.” “Younger? So you haven’t done anything since?” Jungkook interrupted. You looked down at your socks, not knowing what to say back.

“I’m not trying to discourage you but you need to be realistic about these sort of things. You can’t just suddenly decide to switch your major to something that you haven’t even considered or studied about in years. You should do some research and ask people around the department of what it even takes to be a screenwriter and what it takes to study screenwriting.” Jungkook advised to you. What caught you off guard was that he didn’t say it to you with attitude or even in a condescending way. He just told you his opinion.

Normally you would be annoyed with what Jungkook had said to you but you couldn’t help but to agree with him. You needed to really confirm with yourself that this is what you really want to do with your life.

“How did you know that you wanted to be an animator?” you croaked out.

“Simple. I know I’m good at it, I know I can do it, and I know that it makes me happy. I know that I’ll die happy doing my dream job,” Jungkook took a step closer to you and huffed out a soft sigh. “The key is confidence within yourself, ___. Confidence that you know that you can tackle this.” His eyes were piercing deeply into yours. His brown specks glistening from the reflection of the ceiling lights. He looked so good standing right in front of you. His stern glare made his soft, plump pink lips be pursed ito a thin line. The way that you were just one step closer to wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling his lips down onto yours -- the urge was just too strong.

You managed to keep your eyes locked on his, lasering your stare deeply. “Well, if you know that you’re so good at it, then why won’t you just change your major already?” you shot back. Jungkook opens his lips to say something but nothing comes out.

“Guess you’re not as confident as you make yourself out to be.” you smile teasingly at him. If Jungkook was bothered with what you said, he was doing a great job at not showing it. Suddenly his serious gaze turned into a melancholy demeanor. “You have a point.” he admits.

As much as you had badly wanted to shout out “I told you so” to Jungkook, you simply couldn’t but feel concerned as to where his sudden mood shift came from. “What?”

“I said, __, you have a point.” he said monotonically. “Surprisingly enough, you said something that’s making me think analytically.” he rolls his eyes, and pokes his tongue into one of his cheeks.

“You’re annoyingly...quick-witted,” Jungkook stays silent for a moment.

“Is it normal to be afraid of doing something out of the ordinary? Is it normal to be afraid of doing something you have never done before? The thought of just...doing something so out of the norm is just fucking gut-wrenching to me.” Jungkook says softly. You listened to him patiently.

“It doesn’t sound like such a big deal when you really think about: deciding whether or not to major in something I’m passionate in or something that my mother is passionate in me doing. It’s like...I can just do whatever the fuck I want and she has no other choice but to get over it one day. But it’s really not that easy for me. I’d rather be an engineer for the rest of my life if it means that I can get to hear my mom say that she was proud of me for once in my life.” Jungkook continued. He stopped himself from rambling and caught a quick glance at you. You were just listening to him. You didn’t look annoyed or bored of his mini vent. You were paying attention to him, you were hearing him out. You were letting him pour his feelings out to you. You were radiating such a soft and comfortable ambiance to him that he didn’t even realize how easily he was able to just say all this to you. Jungkook was starting to feel uncomfortable at the though of being comfortable.

“Do you want me to give my advice real quick?” you asked suddenly. He nodded. “Just be undecided for the time being. I feel like you shouldn’t just impulsively switch if you aren’t 100% comfortable or confident with your decision. There’s no harm in being undecided. It’s normal to be unsure of yourself with what you want and with what you need. You should just take some time with yourself to think things through in order to truly understand what you want. It’s okay to be a little confused right now. I feel like now is the right time and place and age to be confused.”

Jungkook listened to you seriously. He took you seriously and he took your advice seriously. It was the very first time that he was beginning to view you in a different perspective. He was beginning to see another side of you. Jungkook couldn’t help to admit that you had said just the right words that he needed to hear. That what he was feeling is okay.

“Why is it that you’re not as annoying to talk whenever we have such serious talks like this?” he smirks down at you. You gave him your best fake-offended look. “You judge me too harshly, Jungkook.”

Jungkook grew a genuine smile onto his face. And so did you.

. . .

“Uno!” Taehyung belted out, as he tossed his card into the pile of the others. “Fuck you, man.” Jimin cursed at him, angrily throwing his cards on the carpet. You groaned in annoyance, after losing again for the fifth time tonight. Games of any kind were never in your favor.

“Okay, now can we order some food please? I’m starving.” Jimin whined, as he rubbed his growling stomach. “Yeah, me too.” you agreed. You and Jimin were giving Taehyung a look that was the equivalent of giving puppy dog eyes, silently begging him to buy some food.

“Ugh, you two are so whiny,” Taehyung sneered. “What do you guys want to eat?” “Fried chicken.” Jungkook spoke up out of nowhere. “Yes, chicken please!” Jimin agreed.

Taehyung didn’t say anything as he gave all three of you and annoyed glare. He dialed his favorite fried chicken place as he walked off into the kitchen. You snorted at Taehyung’s fake anger because you already knew that deep down, Taehyung really didn’t mind to get dinner for you guys.

“Any luck on your apartment hunting, Jimin?” Jungkook asked him. “Eh, I haven’t really been apartment hunting that much. I know I need to though. I’ve been smooching off on you guys for too long now.” You gently slapped Jimin’s shoulder.

“Hey! You can live here for as long as you need to, Jimin. I love having you around.”

“As much as I love living with you all, I simply cannot stay here any longer. The guilt is eating me up alive.”

Jungkook playfully shoved Jimin. “If we could turn this living room into your new bedroom just so you can live with us permanently, you know that we would.”

“Don’t make me sad, Kook.” Jimin warned. Jungkook smiled at him and went back to shuffling the cards into the deck. “I’m guessing we’re done playing then.” Jimin presumed. “We’ve played like 8 rounds of this fucking game, we better be done. My attention span can’t handle another round.” you sighed hard, running your fingers through your hair.

“Don’t worry, ___, we’re done playing Uno for tonight,” Taehyung said, reappearing back to the living room. “We can all just chill for a bit while waiting for the chicken to deliver.” Everyone agreed and all hopped back onto the couch. There was a bit of an uncomfortable silence settling between the four of you.

Taehyung darted his eyes between you, Jimin and Jungkook.

“I have something to tell you guys.” Taehyung said abruptly. All three of your heads immediately snapped to gain his attention. You all looked at Taehyung’s beady honey brown eyes with anticipation.

“So, remember how I had submitted my self-made film to that contest from awhile back?” Only you and Jungkook had nodded in response. Jimin looked between the two of you, in confusion, and responded back with a shrug.

“Well...I heard back from them this morning,” The three of you leaned in closer to him, desperately waiting for Taehyung to finish his sentence.

“And?” You asked.

Taehyung had an indescribable look on his face. It was a very intense bittersweet appearance plastered on him. “And…,”

“I got selected to be one of the finalists.” Taehyung finally announced. You immediately jumped into the air and squealed. You didn’t hesitate to run straight into him and suffocate him in inside your arms.

“No freaking way, Tae! What the fuck?!” was all you could manage to say. Suddenly, you felt another body wrap around behind your back, with their arms interlocking both you and Taehyung’s bodies together. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about but I’m so proud of you!” Jimin,the one that was wrapping you and Taehyung together, yelled over your squealing.

Taehyung couldn’t help but beam widely and laugh at the both of your reactions.

“Taehyung, you’re so amazing! There is seriously nothing that you can’t do.” you squished Taehyung even harder, causing him to laugh out loud from the sudden pressure.

Jimin finally released the two of you from his embrace, stepping back to watch Taehyung smile and laugh from the love he’s receiving.

Jungkook finally stood up from the couch and walked over to his brother. You were still squeezing Taehyung, unable to release him from the shackles of your arms.

Jungkook took a quick glance at you and your wide grin that seemed to have been glued onto your face for five minutes straight. “How am I gonna be able to congratulate you with this thing wrapped all around you?” Jungkook sneered, causing Jimin and Taehyung to chuckle.

“___, enough already. You’re causing Tae to turn blue.” Jimin yanked you off from Taehyung’s warm body and pulled you next to him instead.

Jungkook approached his brother and patted on his shoulder, approvingly. “I’m not surprised, hyung. This is well deserved.” Jungkook grinned at his older brother. Taehyung grinned back at him, with possible tears welling up in his eyes. “Nevermind, you’re about to cry.” Jungkook looked disgusted and backed away from him, causing snorting to erupt from Jimin. “No idea that that Tae was the crying type.” you teased Taehyung. Taehyung embarrassedly dabbed his eyes and ran his fingers through hair nervously.

“If you guys are done bullying me, I can tell you when the date of the film festival is.” This caused both you and Jimin to shut up. “So, it’s like tonight.” he shyly admits. “Annoying,” Jungkook muttered under his breath. “Why would you announce this last minute? I have an exam to study for.” Jungkook continued, raising a voice a bit. Taehyung went from nervously ruffling his hair to nervously scratching the back of his neck. “I thought it would be cool to dramatically say the news.” He pouted slightly.

Jimin clicked his teeth and patted his hands onto Taehyung’s shoulder loudly. “Who cares about that nerd. I am so down to go celebrate your work tonight!” Jimin encouraged. You took a quick glance at Jungkook after Jimin’s “nerd” comment and he just smirked and rolled his eyes.

You walked back up to Taehyung and grabbed his hands. “I’m with Jimin! I also have some stuff to do for but its not as important as watching your hard work, Tae.” you grinned up at him. Taehyung smiled back at you and Jimin. His eyes went back to Jungkook’s annoyed face. “Kook, can you please consider joining us tonight?” Taehyung pleaded his little brother. Jungkook groaned and tilted his back, clenching his jaw in even more annoyance. “You know I hate last minute plans.” “Oh come on, live a little. Your exam isn’t even until next week, I don’t know why you wanna study so early.” Jimin scolded the young boy. Jungkook pressed his thin lips in a straight line, being left horribly speechless. You and Taehyung snorted quietly. “Whatever.” was all Jungkook mumbled. The three hopped over to Jungkook and jumped together out of happiness; only annoying Jungkook even more :)

. . .

“Hurry up, __!” Jimin called out to you from your room. “I’m coming!” You yelled back. You were putting on the final touches to your outfit; accessorizing your Maveric Fresh goth mesh black long sleeve mini dress with your silver stud earrings and your favorite statement silver necklace and rings.

You blended your lipstick color by dabbing your fingers softly on your plush lips one last time before finally grabbing your purse and leaving. The festival required a “fancy” dress code, leaving you excited yet nervous because it was the first time that the boys would be seeing you outside of your usual sweats and hoodies. You entered the doorway where the three boys were waiting for you. They were in the middle of a conversation until your soft “I’m ready” snapped them out of their chat.

Immediately, Jimin whistled at you and grinned. “Okay, sexy mama!” You visibly cringed and laughed awkwardly. “Please don’t ever call me that again.”

From the moment Taehyung laid his eyes on you, he could not breathe. He could not stop staring at you. It felt as if time had stopped for a brief second. For the first time ever, Taehyung had begun seeing you as a woman rather than just a friend. And he didn’t not like it. So pretty… He thought to himself. His eyes studied you everywhere: from your head, to your slightly exposed breasts, all the way down to your black strappy heels. “You look great, ___.” He finally said. You blush and smile at him. “Thanks, Tae.”

You had slowly slurred your eyes over at Jungkook to see if he was possibly giving you a mocking glare or rolling his eyes at you. But you were surprised to catch his eyes glued onto you, with a clenched jaw. It looked almost as if he was upset with you. His stare made you nervous–in an anxious way– and you immediately darted your eyes away from him. “Let’s get going.” Taehyung spoke up, and opened the front door, letting his three roommates go in front of him first.

The commute to the film festival was about thirty minutes long. Throughout the bus ride there, you and Jimin sat next together and took turns sharing about your childhood history, what high school was like and how stupid college is. You were surprised that a below average student like you could relate to Jimin’s 4.0-perfect-student personality and attitude towards school.

Taehyung and Jungkook sat next to each other, sitting right behind you and Jimin, and sat in complete yet comfortable but also slightly uncomfortable silence the entire time.

The bus finally stopped at the location where the film festival was located at, and the four of you hopped out of the bus. “Wow..” Taehyung’s eyes glimmered around the festival. The sky was transitioning to a beautifully orangish-pink sunset, and the large green landscape was sprinkled with white fairy lights strung all around; there were rows of black lawn chairs organized, a large podium and stage built, and right behind it was a large projector screen that will be showcasing the nominee’s short films. Behind the lawn chairs were a large table full of champagne glasses and bottles, and pots full of food that Taehyung assumes will be provided for all guests and nominees.

“I can’t believe I get to be here.” Taehyung grins widely to himself. Jimin looks towards his best friends and rubs his back. “We’re all so proud of you,” He commended. “Let’s go find our seats.” Jimin suggested. The four of you walked down the lawn and were welcomed by the sights of other well dressed men and women, the sips and clinks of champagne and the bottles.

“Want me to get you a drink?” Taehyung whispered to you. You perked up and nodded hard. “Cool, I’ll be right back.” Taehyung smiled back at you and walked to the champagne table. “Wow, he didn’t even bother asking us if Kook and I wanted some.” Jimin scoffed, causing you to giggle. “I’ll go with him to get some for you guys.” You said. You were about to turn around and follow Taehyung but Jimin stopped you. “No, it’s fine. I’ll go and and yell at him and then get some for me and Kook.” He half-jokes and jogged ahead. You chuckled to yourself, shaking your head at Jimin’s cute fake jealousy.

It was just you and Jungkook for now. You turned to him and decided to fully soak in how he looked: he was wearing a white button up shirt but he decided to fucking leave the top button unbuttoned, exposing the top part of his chest. He had on a black suit on top with matching black bottoms and black dress shoes. His hair was styled into curtains. He looked gorgeous. Gorgeous was not even a strong enough word to express how good he looked. Gorgeous was an insult.

“You look great.” You managed to squeak out. His eyes bored into yours. He didn’t say anything for a quick second. “You do too.” He said back. Your cheeks immediately got hot, your chest began to burn. Taehyung and Jimin returned with your champagne. “Here you go, m’lady.” Taehyung handed you your glass. You could only just nod to him as a thank you because Jungkook’s very first compliment to you had you speechless.

The fairy lights began to dimmer down. “Come on, the festival is about to start!” Jimin dragged you and Taehyung’s wrists with both of your hands and Jungkook slowly followed after you guys.

Taehyung sat down first, with you following sitting next to him, Jungkook sitting next to you, and Jimin sitting–well–next to Jungkook.

The festival commences at last.

. . .

It has been an hour since the festival has started. Jimin is lowkey bored. Actually, he is highkey bored. He just wants Taehyung to win his award and go party. After the film festival, there is a Halloween party happening later at night. Jimin is thinking nonstop about all the booze he’s gonna drink, all the girls he’s gonna dance with, and the lucky girl he gets to fuck their brains out all night with.

He begins to wander his eyes around the place. Hm, they sure did decorate the place pretty nicely. I really want some more champagne though. He sighs to himself as he fights his urge to get up and chug down his fourth champagne glass of tonight. As he continues to look around the place, blocking out the host’s loud and monotone voice, his sights catches something quite typical.

Taehyung has his eyes glued onto you. My god, he is down so bad for her. When will he accept that?

Jimin smirks at the sight of his best friend practically drooling all over you, while you continue to remain oblivious.

Tae needs to get a fucking grip. How is he focusing on ___ and not on his special night? I mean she does look really hot tonight. Who wouldn’t want to look at her. Poor __. She is so oblivious to her gorgeous sight.

Jimin finally decides to get up and get his next champagne. The waiter hands him his glass. Jimin decides to stand next to the table for a little while because he knows he’s going to need his next one in just a few more seconds.

His eyes catch to Jungkook standing on the far other side from him, where the restrooms were. He too was also just standing where he was, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, and looking straight ahead to the short film that was playing. Jimin was about to walk towards him until,

Until he noticed that Jungkook’s eyes were not at the short film. His eyes were angled a little more downwards.

Where the audience is. It looked like he was looking where you and Taehyung were sitting. Almost looked as if he was staring at where you were sitting.

Why does it look like Jungkook is staring at you?

Jimin’s brows furrowed in confusion. Is Jungkook staring at you? Why hasn’t his eyes moved away from your sight? It’s been minutes.

Maybe something was up with him. Jimin decided to stroll towards. Jungkook perked up and his eyes were shot wide open. He looked as if he was caught doing something he shouldn’t have been doing. “What are you doing watching the film from here? Let’s go sit back down.” Jimin nudged Jungkook in his ribs. “Oh yeah. The view is just nicer from here.” he assured. “Mm.” was all Jimin could say.

The two of them walked back to their seats. For the remaining of the night, Jimin had not caught Jungkook looking towards anywhere else but the screen.

It was finally time to announce the winners of each film category. Taehyung’s category was next: Best New Filmmaker. The winner for the Best Comedy Film was announced. Now for Taehyung’s time.

He was up on the stage next to the other nominees for the category. All four nominees looked sick, excited, anxious, and yet also showing no emotion at the same time.

“God, I’m so nervous for him.” Jimin mumbled to himself but both you and Jungkook could hear him.

“The winner of the best new filmmaker award is awarded to the artist that showed the most daring, fresh storyline and shows the most promising future career of a successful South Korean filmmaker and that he believe will leave an impact in Korean cinema history.” The host begins.

“The winner..of the best new filmmaker goes to,”

You immediately, without any hesitation, clutch your hands tightly around one of Jungkook’s hands. You knew that you should not be doing this. Jungkook might be disgusted and scared. But you didn't care..at least for right now. This is Taehyung’s make it or break it moment. You were scared shitless for him.

“...Kim Taehyung.” He announces.

You instantly squeal, scream and jump for Taehyung. You were probably the loudest cheer of tonight. Taehyung humbly smiles and walks to his award. He grabs his trophy and bows to the host.

You were so happy and full of dopamine rushing to your body that you couldn’t help but to hug Jungkook and jump as you hugged him. Jungkook is immediately caught off guard by your sudden embrace. He and Jimin give each other a weirded out look but Jimin looked way more amused. Jungkook awkwardly hugged you back, patting your back. “S-sorry.” you managed to pull yourself away from the hug and sit back down to your seat. Jungkook tried to reassure you that it was fine but Taehyung returned back to his seat. You went from hugging Jungkook to embracing, engulfing, swallowing Taehyung into your arms. “I am so freaking proud of you, Tae!” you congratulate him, squeezing him tightly. Taehyung couldn’t help but to melt himself into your strong embrace. It felt good to be hugged by you. Not just good but it felt delicious to him. “Thank you so much, ___”.

Jungkook felt as if he was intruding in an intimate moment by the way Taehyung was practically sewed into your body with the way he was hugging you. It seemed as if you had tried to stop embracing him but Taehyung kept you in place, erupting a small giggle from you. Jungkook felt odd seeing the two of you like that. He can’t help but to continuously assume that Taehyung is just stringing you along once more.

“Come on, can we go party now?” Jimin whined. His whining ceased yours and Taehyung’s hug. “We still have the last two big awards left, Chim; film of the year and filmmaker of the year.” Taehyung whined back. “Since you’re making us stay for the entire event, I’m making you buy all the booze that we’re bringing to the Halloween party.” Taehyung half scoffed and chuckled. “Wow, making the ‘best new filmmaker’ buy you booze? This is Taehyung-phobic.” Taehyung said, causing you to cackle and playfully slap his chest.

Jungkook noticed how naturally physical you and Taehyung are with each other. It almost seemed as if you were crushing on his brother and not him anymore. And for some selfish reason, Jungkook didn’t like that he was losing one of his longtime admirers.

. . .

The four of you had finally arrived to Namjoon’s house aka his frat house, which was where the Halloween party was located at. Namjoon is a close friend of Taehyung and Jimin, and Namjoon also happened to be friendly with Yoongi as well. Usually for some dumb reason, guests would have to pay to enter a frat party but since Namjoon was the president of his frat and considered Taehyung, Jimin, and Yoongi as one of his closest friends, he always lets them and their guests enter his frat parties free of charge.

Tonight, you were dressed up as Velma from Scooby Doo. Taehyung decided last minute to be The Joker. Jimin was dressed up as a Greaser and Jungkook decided to be plain and dress up as a Scientist. Jungkook had the large round glasse, white lab coat and wearing a suit underneath his coat.

“You’re here!” Hoseok ran up to you and the three other boys, with Yoongi following right behind him. You laughed in adoration at the couple’s matching costumes. “Are you guys seriously Team Rocket from Pokemon?” You asked. “The one and only! I even spray painted my hair red and Yoongi’s blue to get the look right!” Hoseok grinned proudly. “You two look great.” Taehyung chimed in. Hoseok smiled at his compliment and gave you an approving wink. You rolled your eyes at him, unamused and yet unsurprised at Hoseok continuing with his bewildered thoughts of Taehyung and you liking each other. As if.

“Can I go get you a drink, __?” Taehyung asked you. “Oh, uhm, sure!” You agreed, nodding your head slowly. “What about you, Kook?” Taehyung looked over to his younger brother. “I’m good for now, thanks.” He said monotonically. “Alrighty then..” Taehyung walked over to the drinks. “Where’s Jimin?” you asked your group, looking around for him.

“Uh, is that him already grinding behind some random girl’s ass?” Yoongi pointed out at Jimin, basically airfucking a girl already within the first five minutes of you guys arriving to the party. “Classic Jimin.” Jungkook muttered to himself.

“Yoongi and I are gonna go dance! Meet us on the dancefloor with Taehyung when he comes back with your drinks, __.” Hoseok suggested, already dragging his boyfriend by his wrist into the crowd of people. It was just you and Jungkook left. You felt awkward—as always— and shifted your body uncomfortably.

You tried to look at Jungkook multiple times but he is just so fucking intimidating. You managed to squeak out a few words to him. “Nice music playing, huh?” Jungkook turned his head towards you with unreadable expression plastered on his face. “I guess.” he mumbled. You didn’t know what to say back so you just kept quiet.

Jungkook peered his eyes over to your costume to get a good glance at you. You were wearing an orange cropped sweater with a burgundy red mini skirt and paired with some Doc Marten loafers and..fuck…you’re wearing white fishnets underneath that skirt of yours. Jungkook couldn’t understand how perfectly you could pull off an innocent yet not-so-innocent exterior of yours. You could pull off both at the same time. Your large, thick black squared glasses made you look perfectly like Velma and like a cute nerd at the same time. He couldn’t stand you.

“What made you decide to dress up as Velma?” Jungkook tried to make conversation with you. You snapped your head up to look at him and smiled softly at his question. “I didn’t really feel like buying an actual Halloween costume and I already had the clothes that would allow me to dress up as Velma so…yea.” You finished awkwardly. “‘So…yeah.’” Jungkook mocked you. “Shut up.” you looked away from him, trying to hide your embarrassment from him. Jungkook snickered quietly to himself.

“Okay, I got you something sweet, __. It’s Mikes Hard Lemonade.” Taehyung returned with a grin on his face as he handed you the bottle. “Thanks Tae!” you grinned back at him, taking a few sips of the drink. “Kook, I know you didn’t want anything to drink but I got you a shot just in case.” Jungkook looked at Taehyung, and hesitantly took the shot glass from him. “Thanks, bro.” he held his shot glass up to the air, as if he was doing cheers, and took a very miniscule sip from the tequila.

“Tae, do you wanna go dance? Hoseok invited us to dance after you came back.” you yelled over the music getting louder and louder. Taehyung jumped at the suggestion and immediately held onto your wrist. “Let’s go! Be right back, Kook!” Taehyung dragged you into the crowd of people jumping to the music. You tried to look back at Jungkook, but the crowd was blocking your view. You kind of felt bad that Jungkook was left alone. I’m sure he’ll find something to do.

The entire night, you were just dancing your ass off with your four new best friends: Tae, Hoseok, Yoongi, and Jimin. You were typically the shy type and refused to dance around anyone, not even with Jihyo and Chaeyoung. But the boys brought out the inner child in you. You felt as if you could be your true self with them and they would still gas you up regardless. At this point, you were also pretty tipsy too. You downed another bottle of Mike’s, some shots, and another bottle of soju.

Jimin kept eyeing you the entire night, wondering if he should make a move on you and try to dance with you one-on-one. But he was thinking of doing so to see if Taehyung would get jealous. Jimin loved to mess with his best friend but he also just wanted more confirmation to see if Taehyung was actually into you or not. Jimin shimmied his way closer to you and tried to grind onto you as respectfully as possible.

“Are you trying to make me as another one of your grinding victims tonight?” you joked to him. Jimin just laughed off your joke and got closer to you. “Would you oblige or not?” He whispered against your ear, causing goosebumps to rise up and down your skin. “God, Jimin, what are you doing?” you mumbled to him so that only he could hear.

Before Jimin answered, he took a quick glance at Taehyung. He was violently eyeing the two of you and his jaw was clenched hard. Taehyung took a hard swig from his soju bottle while eyeing you both at the same time. Tae sucks at hiding his emotions Jimin thought to himself.

“Let’s just say that I’ve been noticing a guy that has been staring at you all night and I wanna push his buttons a little bit. Just for funsies.” Jimin replies back to you. You do a quick 360 around the room to look for the guy Jimin was talking about. “Who? Where? When?” you ask fervently, causing Jimin to giggle. “You know that Namjoon guy?” he half-lied. “Yeah, he’s the president of this frat.”

“Well, he hasn’t taken his eyes off of you all night.” Jimin wasn’t necessarily lying. He’s noticed that majority of the guys at the party have glanced at you at least twice. Especially Namjoon. He’s been eye-fucking you all night. But he’s been eye-fucking almost every girl at this party.

“Namjoon is actually a close friend of me and Taehyung’s. Our dads all know each other. He grew up with us.” Jimin decided to toss in a little backstory to give Namjoon some credibility. “Oh.” you mumbled. “Want me to introduce you to him?” he asked, excited to see Taehyung explode from his jealousy. “Sure! He seems nice and it’s even better that he actually knows you guys too.” you agreed. Jimin took you to where Namjoon was and introduced both of you to each other. “You look gorgeous tonight, __”. Namjoon complimented. “Jinkies! Thank you, so do you.” you blushed. Jimin mentally slapped you for your cringey line. Namjoon laughed at your dumb joke. “Wanna dance?” he asked. Namjoon was an extremely attractive man and had the muscles of a Greek god. Coincidentally, he was literally dressed up as a Greek god for tonights. He has practically shirtless and had his nipples pierced. That’s so fucking hot, you mentally drooled to yourself.

Namjoon dragged you into the dancefloor and the two of you began to immerse yourselves into conversation.

Taehyung couldn’t help but to not take his eyes off you dancing with his friend. He felt uncomfortable seeing the way you laughed at whatever he was whispering into your ear. “It’s the fucking nipple piercings isn’t it?” Jimin reappeared out of nowhere, standing right behind his best friend. “Fuck dude, don’t scare me like that.” Taehyung hissed. “What? Can I not talk about Joon’s nipple piercings? Those are literal girl magnets. I should get them some day.” Jimin was basically talking to himself at this point because Taehyung has tuned him the fuck out.

Yoongi chuckled to himself, overhearing Jimin and Taehyung squabbling. “___ and that nipple pierced dude are kinda cute.” Yoongi said to Hoseok. Hoseok stopped dancing and took a look at you and Namjoon laughing and dancing together. Namjoon had his hands borderline touching your ass. “Seems like Taehyung can’t stand it though, do you see the way he is violently eyeing the two of them.” Hoseok smirked, seeing the obliviously jealous Taehyung staring. Yoongi was about to retaliate until he caught another person staring hard at you and Namjoon.

Jungkook was chugging down a bottle of soju while eyeing you and Namjoon at the same time. He had no readable expression on his face but it seemed as if he looked slightly…annoyed? Yoongi found the sight to be interesting since it was the first time he has noticed Jungkook acknowledging your existence and acknowledging you as a girl and not just as his annoying roommate.

“Hm.” Yoongi tried to mumble to himself but Hoseok overheard. “Hm what?” “Nothing, babe. I’m gonna go get another drink.” Yoongi walked off, smiling to himself.

. . .

You finished your dance with Namjoon awhile ago and you returned to being around your friends, this time with Jungkook included. He had finally joined the party after getting bored just standing by the entrance for an entire hour. Jungkook was slowly dancing to the beat of the song playing while you and Taehyung were jumping up and down like little kids high on sugar.

As you and Taehyung were dancing, a girl approached you three. She had dark brown hair and was dressed up as a Playboy bunny. She was also very extremely gorgeous. She approached Jungkook and did not hesitate to flirtatiously touch his arm. “Do you wanna dance, Doctor?” she asked Jungkook straightforwardly. Jungkook had his lips set in a straight line. You couldn’t help but to nosily watch the two.

“I’m drunk.” Jungkook simply said to the girl. You assumed this was his way of kindly rejecting her offer. The girl gave him an odd glance and nervously bit her lower lip. “Got it.” she simply said and walked away. Funny enough, she made her way to Jimin and was dancing with him.

“Dude! Why didn’t you dance with her, she was hot!?” Taehyung shouted at Jungkook. Jungkook simply shrugged off his brother’s words and sipped on his shot. “He can be so boring sometimes.” Taehyung said to you, causing a small giggle from you. “He was probably not into her mistaking him to be a doctor.” you said loud enough for Jungkook to hear. Taehyung snickered at your comment.

Taehyung was having a great time dancing with you. He decided to make use of his time with you and made sure you were going to have such a great time with him that you wouldn’t leave his side.

Save Your Tears by The Weeknd starts playing. The very high-energy song causes your tipsy self to go wild and your energy is reciprocated by Taehyung. You quickly take down a jello shot and spin around jumping to the song. “Wait, ___, you have a little something on your face.” Taehyung spun you around to face him. “What is it?” Taehyung chuckled seeing a red jello piece on the corner of your mouth. “Hold on, let me just pick at it real quick.”

Taehyung swiped off the jello from your lips with his thumb. He showed it to you and you began to cackle. “Sorry about that.” you blushed in embarrassment. “Don’t be.” Taehyung says and sucks off his jello from the thumb. Your eyes grew wide at the sight. He remained eye contact with you as he sucked it off his thumb. You had no idea what to do or feel. The moment felt like a draft just flew by you. Taehyung was about to say something before a random girl approached him and asked him to dance. She stood in between you and Taehyung, not giving you any attention at all.

You scoffed at her, hoping she heard. Not even his girl but if I was, that’s a bitch move you thought to yourself. Taehyung gave you an apologetic look. “I’ll be right back, ___!” Taehyung allowed the girl to drag him to the floor. To be honest, Taehyung didn’t want to dance with her and he just had plans on keeping you by his side for the rest of the night. However, he thought about how he didn’t want give off the impression that you and him were dating to other potential girls that would look his way. But something gnawed at his chest at the thought of leaving you alone. Leaving you alone means you were available. Leaving you alone means you were gonna run off for the rest of the night.

But why does he care? He’s dancing with a cute girl right in front of him and that’s all he should be focusing on right now.

Tipsy (borderline drunk) you decided that it would be fun to keep Jungkook company while Taehyung was off with that girl. “Can I dance with you?” you asked him. Jungkook was obviously out of it too, considering he decided to let alcohol accompany him as his date tonight. He nodded at you. “Having fun?” you asked him, talking loud over the music.

“I am, actually.” he admits. He gave you a lopsided smile, causing an instant warmth to your stomach. “That’s great to hear.” you smile back. The two of you are just swaying your bodies to the music.

“You seem to be popular with the men tonight.” Jungkook slurred. “What do you mean?” you slurred back. “First Namjoon, and now Taehyung. You’re boomeranging between the two.” Jungkook chuckles. For some reason, this bothers you. It’s almost as if Jungkook said it in a malicious tone. You decide to ignore it and continue swaying your body.

“What? Cat got your tongue?” Jungkook teases. You furrow your brows at him in annoyance. “I’m just dancing?”

“Dancing alone for once. Congrats.” he mumbles.

“What are you insinuating?” you bark at him, causing the boy to smirk.

“Can I not joke with you?” “Actually, no you can’t. We aren’t friendly enough to joke.” you snap.

If Jungkook was offended, he didn’t show it at all. “Seemed pretty friendly when you held my hand on the rollercoaster.” he teased again. You laugh in disbelief. “What, ar-are you just fucking forgetful or something? Weren’t you literally about to shit your pants on that stupid ride? I was preventing an accident.” you said back. This earned a chuckle from Jungkook.

He didn’t say anything after that though. “That’s what I thought. Pipe down.” you seethed in annoyance at him. It seems as if you and Jungkook keep forgetting that you cannot be around each other when the two of you are under the influence; world war 3 starts to happen every single time.

“Seeing you desperately jumping from guy to guy is embarrassing.” He states. You know he is trying to get under your skin. You know what he is trying to do. He thrives off of seeing you angry for some sinister reason. Why is that? “I know what you’re trying to do and it’s not gonna work on me.” You said in a low voice, as an attempt to calm yourself down.

“What are you talking about?” Jungkook asked knowingly. Riling you up like this was like a game for Jungkook. You can be so easy to piss off and the way your nose automatically scrunches furiously, hands shake, and face reddens was amusing to him. He loved knowing that he could push your buttons so easily. Knowing how happy-go-lucky you always are with everyone else, Jungkook liked knowing this angry side of you. He felt as if this side was reserved for him and for him only. Only he can pick on you. Only he can fluster you, make you shy, make you stutter when he’s around. He loves knowing how easily your emotions fold for him.

“Don’t fucking play dumb with me. You always act like a dickhead and pick on me whenever you’re drunk. Even when you’re sober too. Why can’t you ever just give me a break? I truly don’t even know what I see in you sometimes.” you spat out. The fact that you had hinted that you were still into him made your eyes immediately widen. No fucking way I said that right in front of him.

One of his eyebrows arched upwards, with a smirk complimenting it. “You must see a lot in me to keep liking me after all this time.”

Anger was boiling inside of you and you swear you could feel yourself sobering just by how embarrassed and irritated you are. You were done with this little game you had with Jungkook. One day he’s hot, next day he’s cold. One day he’s up, next day he’s down. You were tired of his mixed signals; either he was a friendly roommate with you or just a coldblooded asshole. There was no in between. You decided that as of this moment, you were done with Jungkook.

What was the point of wasting your energy, feelings, and thoughts over a guy who can’t even see you as a fucking human being with feelings? You knew you were wasting your time with Jungkook. It’s been years since you have had these pent up emotions for him. You were in love with the idea of him, not him truly. At least you think so. There were better guys out there right? Like Namjoon. The two of you had hit it off so well and you were enjoying your time dancing with him. There are also guys that are just as decent and respectful like Jimin, Hoseok, and even Taehyung.

Jungkook wasn’t worth your time.

“I’m done liking you, Jungkook.” you firmly said to the boy.

Jungkook’s eyes seemed to have darkened at your words. His eyes showed a mix of confusion and something else. But his face showed nothing. Pure nothingness. Just like how you knew how he felt towards you. Just nothing.

You walked past him, roughly brushing your shoulder against his arms. You needed a fucking break from him. You were making your way towards any restroom that you could find in this packed and sweaty frat house.

That was until you felt someone following behind you.

Unexpectedly, when you turned your body around you were met with Jungkook.

“Bullshit.” He simply said. Cocky as fuck.

“What is?” you asked, turning away from him as you went up the stairs to find a restroom.

“You really think you can just stop liking me like that? Like you really think emotions are just something you can turn off, like it’s a switch?”

You scoffed at his words. “What? You do the exact same thing. I’ve seen more emotions on a painting than I have seen on you.”

Jungkook had his tongue poking deep into his cheek. He knew that he was drunk and knew that he was growing to become an asshole minute by minute; as if he was a beast that would not stop growing.

All of a sudden, you and Jungkook had ran into Hoseok, Yoongi and Jimin walking down the stairs. “Oh hey ___ and Kook!” Jimin grinned at you both. “Hey.” You replied monotonically.

“You good, ___?” Hoseok asked with worryness in his voice.

“I’m fine.” you grimaced at the trio. Yoongi and Hoseok shared a confused look with each other. Jimin could tell something was up with Jungkook by the way his jaw was clenched.

“Are you sure?” Yoongi asked while darting his eyes back and forth between you and Jungkook.

“___’s upset because I pointed out how she was looking so desperate tonight.” Jungkook spoke. Your face froze and felt cold. The fucking audacity of him.

The three boys fell into an uncomfortable silence, not knowing what to say. “Please don’t listen to Jungkook. He’s just drunk and has nothing better to do than bother me. He’s just acting like a fucking loser. He is a loser.” You spat out, glaring at your friends.

“Um, __ do you maybe wanna go and get some air?” Hoseok asked, and ran his hands up and down on your arms. “I’m actually gonna go use the restroom. So if you guys just excuse me.” You began to walk up the stairs again until Jungkook just had to open up his mouth again.

“Be careful, ___. You don’t wanna run into another guy that you can grind yourself into. Don’t wanna give yourself a bad image now don’t you?” He taunted. He just keeps on going doesn’t he? He just keeps going on embarrassing you.

You were about to just walk away and not pay any attention to the useless words Jungkook was vomiting out until you suddenly remembered an extremely valuable item that would shut him the hell up.

You spun your body back around and faced towards Yoongi, Hoseok and Jimin. And gave Jungkook a sweet smile. “Funny how Jungkook wants to talk shit about me and act like he does no wrong when he is literally hiding a super dark secret from you guys.” You started out. The four boys all had a perplexed look on their faces.

You didn’t see Taehyung walking his way up

the stairs. He had finally found you after finishing his dance with the girl. He had seen you and Jungkook running off somewhere while he was in the middle of dancing and was trying to see if the two of you were okay. He saw you on the very top of the stairs looking below at Jungkook, Yoongi, Hoseok and Jimin.

You reached into your bag and took out your phone. You cracked open your phone case and slid out a small photo. The very photo Taehyung gave you as a manipulation tool to get Jungkook to tutor you for that one chemistry exam.

—

Taehyung catches up to you, breathless. “Why, what’s wrong?” You continue to run as fast you can. “I forgot that I had a fucking exam in 12 hours and I really need to study for it.” you explain to him.

“Shit, I’m sorry, __. I didn’t realize how much time we had spent just talking.” Taehyung apologizes. You just mutter an “it’s okay” and continue to speed back home.

A few minutes later, you arrive at the complex and hurry onto an elevator. “Do you need any help?” Taehyung offers. You shake your head. “No, I’m fine. This is something I have to deal with myself.”

Silence fills the elevator and it dings open onto your floor. You push past the slowly opening doors and rush to your place. You furiously key in the passcode and enter the apartment.

Taking off your shoes, you immediately stride towards your refrigerator and grab at least 3 cans of espresso to prepare yourself for the allnighter you’re about to pull.

“Thank you for today, Taehyung.” you give him a curt smile and begin to walk towards your room until Taehyung grabs your arm and stops you. “Wait a minute, I have an idea.”

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his wallet. He opens it and pulls out a small picture, and places it onto your palm. You looked down at your hand and examined the photo Taehyung had rested upon your hand.

You immediately snort at the sight of the picture on your palm. You shake violently with laughter and place your hand over your mouth. It was a picture of a much younger version of Jungkook wearing a pink, fluffy dress. He had on a swatch of bold, red lipstick applied messily all over the outline of his lips and his hair was full of sparkly clips all around his head.

“No way.” you breathe out, snorting even harder. “We made a bet when we were younger and he lost, so this was his punishment.” Taehyung explains. You toss your head back in laughter. “Wait, but why are you giving this to me?” you ask.

Taehyung looks as if he’s about to tell you a top secret. He leans against your ear and whispers,

“I want you to threaten Jungkook with this picture to help you study for the exam.” Your eyes widen at the idea.

“You’re evil, Taehyung.” you smirk. Taehyung laughs darkly. “Now, go. Don’t waste anymore time.”

—

“It seems as if Jungkook had a crossdresser era.” You shoved the photo in front of the three guys. Jimin did not hesitate to scream from laughter. Hoseok snorted loudly and Yoongi’s upper lip twitched.

“No fucking way! Kook, is this actually you?” Jimin twirled to look at him. Jungkook's face turned to a bright pink color and if it wasn’t possible enough, his jaw clenched even tighter.

“And since Jungkook wants to slut shame me so bad, let’s see how he would feel if I did this.” You strutted in front of him,

“___, stop, what are you doi-“

And shoved his pants down to his ankles.

He was completely mortified, speechless, furious, and if there was a word that was a combination of all three of those emotions, he was feeling that times ten.

This time Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi laughed all

together when they all saw Jungkook’s Rilakumma themed boxers. You had to stifle back a laugh yourself, and so did Taehyung.

He roughly brought his pants back up and buckled them as tight as he could. He looked at the way you were finding this situation so humorously.

“Doesn’t feel too great does it, ‘Kook’?” You enunciated ‘Kook’ so annoyingly and Jungkook felt as if steam was blowing out of his ears. “I’ll see you guys after I use the restroom.” You tell the three and made your way into a random hallway, looking for a bathroom.

Jungkook didn’t hesitate to follow you, pushing himself through the couple and Jimin. He gripped onto your wrists and pulled you into the first room he could find.

Taehyung watched the two of you intently, running off together. He felt dubious seeing the two of you on your own together.

“What the fuck are you doing?” You hissed at Jungkook. He brought you into a random empty bedroom. Jungkook began marching around the room back and forth, trying to collect his words together.

“What? Cat got your tongue?” You teased.

Jungkook gave you an intimidating glare. “What the hell is wrong with you?” He starts off.

“What’s wrong with me? What is wrong with you? You basically fucking slut shamed me in front of our friends?!”

“You did not have to embarrass me like that, __.” Jungkook continues to march around back and forth.

“I actually don’t care, Jungkook. You don’t seem to give a single any fucks about how you constantly treat me so why should I suddenly feel bad for you after what I did? Get a grip.”

“What are you doing this for? To get over me? Is this what you’re doing?” Jungkook stopped marching and approached himself. Your back was against the door.

“Again with this. I am over you, Jeon Jungkook. I have moved on from my high school crush on you a long time ago. All feelings that you think I have left for you are gone.” You looked deeply into his black doe eyes. You knew you weren’t fully over him, obviously, but he doesn’t need to know that.

Jungkook’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down. “Why don’t I believe you?” His voice lowered as he said that. He took a few steps closer to you.

“Your pride is preventing you from seeing things clearly.”

Jungkook had the audacity to come even closer to you. Your back firmly flat on the door and you felt as if you were being suffocated by his presence.

“Say it again.”

“Say what again?”

“That you’re over me.”

You scoffed in front of his face. “I’m over you, Jeon Jungkook.”

You looked at him dead in the eyes. Trying to get him to be convinced by your words.

“And I think it would be best if we were to firmly remain as just roommates and nothing else.” You continued. You felt your heart breaking. You knew this distance from Jungkook would hurt like hell. He’s been your longtime crush for so long, it would be uncomfortable for you to just cut off complete contact with him.

“Is that what you want?” He muttered under his breath.

You nodded slowly. The both of you kept strong eye contact with each other. His eyes softened but it softened in a hard way, ironically.

Jungkook opens his mouth and says,

“Would you be opposed if I were to kiss you right now?”

Your heart dropped so low that you could feel down to your toes.

“Wha-“

Jungkook leans in and brushes his lips on yours. “If you want me to stop then say it. And I’ll leave.”

You felt as if your chest was burning and aching. Your chest was heaving up and down at the contact of Jungkook, the boy you've been in love with for years, asking for your permission to kiss you.

Jungkook smirked at your silence. “That’s what I thought.” He whispered.

He closes the gap between you both and hungrily kisses you.

You could immediately tell a moan wanted to come up your throat at the taste of Jungkook on your lips.

Embarrassingly, you did not hesitate to kiss him back.

Jungkook cupped your face roughly with his veiny, big hands.

His kiss was getting rougher and hungrier each second. You mindlessly nibbed at his lower lip, earning a groan from him. His groaning was enough for you to feel your lower area purr for him.

He began trailing wet sloppy kisses from the corner of your lips and going all the way down to your neck. He began leaving love bites on you, and you were trying so hard to not moan for him.

You didn’t want him to know how good he was at kissing, and how good he was at making you feel so fucking horny. “Fuck, your lips taste so good.” Jungkook muffled while giving you deep hickies all over your neck. It was as if he was trying to mark his territory on you.

His words finally earned a moan from you, not being able to hold it in anymore. “Kiss me more.” You demanded.

He continues kissing your neck. “Kiss me more, what?”

You sighed annoyingly. Even as he’s kissing you, he is still so aggravating. “Not going to say that. You don’t deserve it.” You fight back.

For some reason, your retaliation turns on Jungkook. He loved how you don’t hesitate to fight back. The banter you two share, your feisty relationship with each other, he enjoyed every single second of it.

He kissed you back, not caring to retaliate further with you. He was surprised with how soft and tasty your lips were.

“You still want to stop liking me?” He said in between kisses. “Mhm.” You kissed him harder. “Why are you kissing me then, ___?”

Jungkook rarely says your name. But when he does, it sends butterflies throughout your entire body. You could feel your underwear dampen.

“I can’t have fun?” You say back.

Jungkook slips his tongue inside your mouth. He is practically shoving it into your throat and you happily obliged. You allowed his tongue to explore every single inch of your mouth.

You hesitantly stuck your tongue inside his, earning another groan from him. You were too shy to kiss all the crevices of his perfect mouth.

You’ve only kissed one person in your entire life. It was back in high school and you, Jihyo, and Chaeyoung were playing truth or dare in a circle with your other classmates when it was past schooltime. You dared to kiss the guy you found the cutest in the circle. You kissed Kim Seokjin, the heartthrob of your class. It was probably the boldest move you have ever made. Seokjin was gorgeous and all but he couldn’t compare to Jungkook. You remembered wishing Jungkook was in your class so that he could’ve been in the circle and you would’ve kissed him.

And now here you are; making out sloppily and hungrily with Jeon Jungkook. You were sobered up at this point but you didn’t know if Jungkook was still out of it or not.

Jungkook snapped you out of your thoughts when he turned your body around without asking. Your face was pressed against the door. “God, these fucking tights on you.” Jungkook muttered under his breath.

He lifted your skirt up and began gently massaging your ass.

“You look so good in these tights, ___.” He whispered into your ear. He was grabbing handfuls of your ass, gripping them tightly. You let out a whine at his touch. He was gripping onto your cheeks as if they were trying to run away from him.

He began a new trail of kisses from your earlobes going all the way down to your neck, upper back, then middle of your back, lower back, and all the way down to your ass cheeks.

He groaned at the sight of you wearing a thong underneath your fishnet tights. He stared at your ass cheeks as if they were a treasure chest full of gold.

He started off with biting your cheeks softly, each bite getting soft moans from you. His nibbling turned into giving you more hickies. You hissed at the bittersweet pain. “Fuck, Jungkook.” You whispered to yourself

His hickies switched into slapping your ass cheeks. He admired the way they jiggled with each slap. He was adoring the red marks he was leaving all over you. He was obsessed with the way you moaned over the kisses and slapping he was giving you.

He reached down underneath your cheeks, right where he could see the back entrance of your labia.

“You’re fucking drenched, __. Fuck, I can see it from back here.” Jungkook moaned out at the sight. You could feel heat rising up to your cheeks from the embarrassment of Jungkook seeing the wet mess he caused.

“S-Shut up.” You croaked out. Jungkook smiled at your stutter. He looked back down at your wet entrance. He mewled at how good it looked and was desperate to know what your pussy tasted like.

“May I finger you?” He asked for your consent. Even when he’s a jackass 99 percent of the time, he is still generous with his touch.

You nodded in approval. Jungkook slapped your ass hard. “I need to hear you consent it.”

You gulped saliva down in horniness. “Yes, Jungkook. Finger me.”

He slapped your ass again, causing you to yelp. “Fuck!” You cried out.

“Finger me, what?” He tried again. You desperately wanted to feel any part of Jungkook inside of you. You had a feeling he wasn’t going to let this one go. So you swallowed your pride and begged out. “Finger me, please. Please.”

Jungkook did not hesitate to slide your thong to the side and opened your labias apart. He groaned at the sight of your glistening and dripping cunt. Your cunt was so perfectly gorgeous. Jungkook has never seen a pussy as gorgeous as yours. He inserted two fingers inside of you. You both gasped at the touch.

Your pussy was so warm and soft. You were so loose and eager for his touch, he could shove at least both of fists inside of you. That was how loose you were for him.

He decided to put in a third finger, and quickened his thrusts inside of you. You tried to cover your mouth to stop him from hearing you moan but fuck he was fingering you so good.

“Don’t hide your moans from me, __. Let me hear how good I’m making you feel.” He demanded. He crouched up from his squat and continued to finger you hard as he rested his body against your back. He leaned back to whisper filthy words to you.

He uncovered your mouth with his one free hand and your moans erupted as soon he did so. “Fuck, you sound so pretty like that.” He praised.

His touch and words were beginning to make you feel dizzy from pleasure. “Fuck, Jungkook. Right there.” You nodded in pleasure.

“You’re such a fucking liar. I thought you were over me, huh? Why are you letting me finger your brains out right now?” He whispered. You were panting heavily at this point and could feel a sweat roll dripping down your head. Jungkook sucked on your earlobe as he continued to finger you hard.

“Oh shit, I’m gonna cum,” You warn him. This encourages him to continue his pace and attempts to deepen his fingers into your wet cunt.

“Fuck Jungkook, I’m-“

“Do you wanna cum for me? Do you want to cum all over my fucking fingers?” He says as he continues to bite your earlobe.

“Oh my fucking god, please.” Your voice shakes. You could feel your pussy clenching around his fingers and a tight knot was forming bigger each second in your abdomen.

You begged Jungkook to allow yourself to release all over him. “Please let me cum, holy fuck.”

Your precious begging was enough for him. His member was rock hard for you and he felt as if he could just cum inside of his pants just by your words and moans and the touch of your pussy.

“Cum for me, __.” He only needed to demand that from you once because as soon as he finished his sentence, you were releasing yourself all over him. In fact you were release turned into a squirting. You screamed in pleasure and euphoria from cumming all over the fingers of beautiful Jeon Jungkook.

“Holy shit, ___. You’re puddling all over me.” Jungkook was in awe at your liquidy mess.

Your eyeballs rolled all the way to the back of your head “F-fuuck.” You managed to croak out. Your chest was heaving extremely hard. You turned to face Jungkook and his lips were glistening pink and plump. His face was flushed. He looked so gorgeous and grossly sexy that you couldn’t help but to kiss him furiously.

He welcomed your kiss and picked you up. He pinned you against the door as he deepened the kiss, and wrapped your legs tightly around his waist.

“You cummed so good for me, ___.” He praised. You smiled small into the kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck.

The orgasm you had was so strong that you almost said you loved him. Jungkook. Jungkook. Jungkook. His name was running circles all around your silly little head.

The aftercare Jungkook was giving was so opposite to his usual rough personality. The kisses downgraded into soft and intimate-like kisses. He gently dropped your legs back on the ground and softly held onto you as he kissed you.

Suddenly, he paused the kiss and stepped back away from you. Jungkook was just eyeing you, observing yourself and the situation. Your entire bottom half was clearly soaked and the poor random guy’s floor had a puddle stain.

His finger was dripping from your squirt still and some of your liquid got on his pants too. Jungkook had successfully prevented himself from cumming in his pants. However, he was dangerously close to jizzing himself. His pride wouldn’t allow himself to live knowing that he had cummed in his boxers just by fingering you and by kissing you. He wasn’t sixteen anymore, he thought to himself.

Jungkook looked around the room to look for anything to clean up the mess. He found a tissue box on the person’s nightstand. He grabbed the box and basically used up the entire box to clean you up and the floor.

You looked down at Jungkook squatting in front of you as he was cleaning you up. Your heart automatically fluttered at his aftercare gesture.

There was an uncomfortable silence and tension beginning to cloud the room. Is he regretting this? Is he embarrassed of what we did? Negative thoughts began swarming you. You could feel anxiety swallowing you whole and you just desperately needed Jungkook to say something. Anything.

After cleaning up the “spill”, he threw away the tissues along with the box. Jungkook was dreading to face you all of a sudden. It was as if he felt shy to be around you.

Jungkook’s silence was becoming too much for you. “What are you thinking about?” You decided to blurt out.

His eyes widened at your question. Licking his lips, furrowing his brows, and shifting his feet uncomfortably was Jungkook trying to stall his response.

“I don’t know what to think.” he replied honestly. The aftercare session allowed him to sober up and to fully absorb what had just happened between you both. He was drunk during the entire hookup.

“Right.” was all you could say back.

It wasn’t that Jungkook regretted what he did, he was just too fucking drunk to comprehend what he was actually doing. Why did he have the urge to kiss and finger you like that? What was it about you that made Jungkook so desperate to touch you like that?

“Let’s just forget this happened.” You suggested. He perked up at you, giving you a confused glance. “Why are you saying that?”

You wanted Jungkook to think that what happened meant nothing to you. Just like how you knew you meant nothing to him. You didn’t want him to know that you have only fallen harder for him and crave his kisses and touch more than you can believe. You didn’t want Jungkook to know that in fact do not regret what happened at all. Not even an ounce of regret. You don’t want him to break your heart even more. You don’t see this as you putting a wall up;

This is you giving Jungkook up.

“Because..like I said: I don’t have feelings for you anymore. This was just a mistake.”

Jungkook felt a sort of numbness to your words. He felt embarrassed, stupid, and suddenly began regretting the hookup as well. You made him feel all sorts of emotions. The most emotions he has ever felt since you moved in as his roommate.

“Let’s forget it then. Like you said…we are just roommates. I’m sorry.” His jaw clenched a bit but you couldn’t see that. All you could see was how he did not look pressed at all by your suggestion. He doesn’t seem to give a single fuck. How did so much happen in just under twenty minutes?

“Right,” You began. You readjusted your skirt and rubbed your neck. A pang of soreness shot through you. The hickies he left had stung so strongly.

“I’m leaving first.” Jungkook abruptly cleared his throat and opened the door first. He took one last glance at you. You were hoping that your broken heart wasn’t showing through your face.

He gave you a curt nod and closed the door, leaving you alone in a stranger’s bedroom.

Once you felt as if Jungkook was an earshot away, you immediately crouched down against a wall and cried your heart out.

You were not ready to let Jungkook go. But you had to. Why love a man that did not care to signify your existence?

Your sobbing had you coughing to catch your breath. Your vision was beyond blurred and your heart was hurting so badly. Your first hookup with the man you have been yearning over for years was like an addiction: It feels amazing at first but after some time passes by, it hurts. Full of disappointment. Full of guilt.

The door swung wide open. You looked up slowly and tried identifying who the mysterious person that entered was but your vision was still clouded by your tears.

“__?” A familiar voice said your name.

You wiped your tears away and looked at the unknown person that apparently recognizes you.

“Namjoon?” You say.

Namjoon looked surprised to see you sitting on his floor, flooded in tears. He had his eye caught on the three large hickies that were spreaded throughout your neck.

He immediately grew worried at the connection of seeing you crying with obvious marks on your body. He knelt down in front of you and gripped his hands onto both of your shoulders. “Shit, ___, did you get hurt? Did someone hurt you?” He tried to get you look into his eyes.

“Wh-What?”

“You’re obviously in distress, __. Tell me who did it, I swear I’ll beat the living shit out of them. Who the fuck is preying on girls at my party? Tell me what happened? Are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital?” He babbled.

You used your hands to hold onto Namjoon’s wrists that were still being gripped on your shoulders. “Namjoon? I’m okay. Nothing happened to me.” You began reassuring him.

“Th-Then why are you crying? In my room too?”

Your mouth gaped wide open. What are the odds did I end up getting finger fucked in Namjoon’s room?

His poor floor. And the door. And his room in general.

“I-I may have hooked up with someone in your room?” You were afraid he was gonna bash your head against the wall.

“Oh. Well, did you guys do it on my bed?”

“No.”

“Okay well then I don’t care.”

A chuckle escaped from your lips. Namjoon smiled at the sight of you laughing.

“So did this hookup not end well?”

“How’d you know?” You sarcastically said. He smirked. “Lucky guess?” This earned another chuckle from you.

“How did a hookup end up with you sobbing your eyes out? Did he say another girl’s name or something? Or a guy’s name?”

“Shut up,” you laughed. “No..he just…used me. And it just hurts being used. Feeling used. He just used me knowing that he feels nothing for me.” You blurt out.

Namjoon could see the hurt in your eyes. “Must really like the guy, huh?” You let your silence answer his rhetorical question.

“Well I’m sorry you’re going through it.”

You nodded at his not-so-helpful words. “Thank you. I’ll be okay though.”

Namjoon had a crazy idea in mind. Well, it wasn’t crazy for him.

“This is gonna sound extremely insensitive of me. This is probably the worst timing in history of timings to ask you this but,”

“Do you want to have sex?”

Is my Halloween costume giving off pheromones or something?

Oddly, you weren’t disgusted with the offer. “Are you suggesting this to make me feel better? If so, there are other non-sexual ways to do that.”

Namjoon felt his cheeks get hot and nervously scratched the back of his neck. “S-Sorry, this is usually how I cope with anything.”

“With sex? You cope your issues with sex? Are you constantly in heat or something?” Namjoon wheezed out a soundless laugh. “Fuck you.”

You giggled, throwing your head back.

“Well then how about a date? Maybe I can show you how a man is supposed to treat you. You can show that jerk you’re better off without him.”

You timidly smiled at him. “Okay. Let’s do that.”

Namjoon reached into his back pocket and took out his phone. “Your number, please.” He grinned, showcasing his dimpled cheeks.

. . .

Jungkook made it back to the party. Taehyung ambushed him with questions as soon as he saw Jungkook walking back down the stairs alone.

“Where did you and __ go? Is she alright?”

“She’s okay. She just had a question about homework or whatever.” He lied.

“Well where is she now?” Taehyung pressed. “Don’t know, Taehyung. You can go call her or something.” He walked away from Taehyung before he could bother him with any more questions about you. You were the last person he wanted to be thinking about right now.

His sober thoughts were pissing him the fuck off. He needed more alcohol to distract him. And so that’s what he did. He chugged down one shot

Two shots turned into three and three turned into five.

Before he knew it, he was back to feeling buzzed. Back to his reckless bitchy behavior. All of the girls that he caught checking him out looked fuckable and forgettable.

His eyes darted over to a familiar looking girl. She had dark brown hair and was dressed up as a Playboy bunny: the same girl who had asked him out to dance earlier.

His drunk body led him to her. She was watching him making his way towards her. As soon as he reached to where she was, in the middle of the dancefloor, Jungkook introduces himself: “I’m Jungkook.”

“I know who you are.” She flashes him an obvious flirtatious smile.

“You do, huh?” He flirts back.

“You’re Jeon Jungkook. The heartthrob of Konkuk University.” She continues. “Heartthrob? Don’t flatter me.”

"Why? I want to flatter you as much as I can so you can finally dance with me.”

Jungkook cocked an eyebrow up. “You’re persistent, aren’t you?”

“Very.” she simply says.

“Why would I dance with a girl whose name I don’t even know of yet?” he teases. The girl looked down, smiling. “I’m Yeri.” She introduces.

“Well Yeri, would you like to dance?” Jungkook grabbed onto one of her hands. They were small and dainty compared to his large veiny hands.

Yeri led Jungkook to another area of the dancefloor. Jungkook liked how she had a dominant personality. She knows what she wants and knows how to get what she wants.

They danced to around three songs together and each song, Yeri and Jungkook were nonstop flirting. Jungkook would run his hands by her lower back and would keep direct eye contact with her. Yeri threw in playful hits on the chest, seductive stares, and went along with the eye contact as well.

From the corner of his eye, Jungkook saw you walking down the stairs. His laugh at Yeri’s joke faltered when he saw you. You were smiling from ear to ear. You stopped once you reached th the bottom of the stairs, as if you were waiting for someone.

As if on cue, Kim Namjoon followed behind you and caught up with you to the end of the stairs. The two of were in conversation and he led you to dancefloor as well; only a few feet away from Yeri and Jungkook.

Taehyung saw you and Namjoon walking down the stairs together. He felt a strange feeling in the middle of his chest seeing the two of you together. Taehyung assumed that you and Namjoon had only a one-time dance situation however it seemed as if the two of you got close within a few hours of meeting each other.

He took down a shot of his drink.

Jungkook and Taehyung –both watching you from their prospective locations– watched the way you threw your head back in laughter at whatever Namjoon was saying. Namjoon would talk into your ear, and you would talk into his.

The same ear that Jungkook bit the shit out of earlier.

“Let’s just forget this happened.” “Like I said, I don’t have feelings for you anymore.” Your words replayed in Jungkook’s mind. And that was when he felt as if he had a point to prove to you. He didn’t know what point he had exactly in mind, but he just felt like this was something he should do at this very moment.

And so, he turned back to Yeri and leaned down to her to ask her something. A favor for Jungkook, personally.

It was you who noticed Taehyung on his way to the door. Judging by the way you saw him tossing his shot cup into the trash, you knew he was on his way home.

“Namjoon. I think my ride is ready to go.” You half-lied. You, Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook had all ubered to the party with the intention of you four getting fucked up drunk tonight. Still, you didn’t want Taehyung going home alone.

“Alright, __. I’ll text you tomorrow morning?” Namjoon asks. You nod in agreement and run off to meet up with Taehyung. “Hey! Tae!” you call out to him. The two of you are outside, and you managed to catch up to him.

“__. You’re leaving too?” Taehyung asks. “Yeah! I’m starting to get tired.” you yawn. “So am I. Too much dancing and drinking. My old body needs a rest.” You laugh at Taehyung. “You’re literally so dramatic. You’re a twenty-two year old man.”

“Yeah, a very weak and brittle boned twenty-two year old man.” You laughed again at Taehyung’s exaggerations. You noticed how safe you feel when you’re with him. The entire party, you were on edge for majority of the time: Jimin introduces you to Namjoon, you dance with Namjoon, Jungkook pisses you the fuck off, and then he kisses and fingers you and makes you squirt, Jungkook made you cry because he used you, and now Namjoon asks you out on a date. To say that you were mentally done was an understatement; a big understatement.

Taehyung is one of your bestest friends now. You trust him with your life. The way Taehyung makes you feel whenever you are with him is enough to prove to you that Taehyung has been your missing puzzle piece all along. He is the friend you needed to have in your life. Someone that you can gossip with, joke around with, hang with, be stupid with, and everything in between.

“You know I love you right?” you confess to him. Taehyung stops in his tracks and bores his eyes into yours. “You what?” He said in a low voice. Why was his heart beating so fast? Why was he feeling euphoric all of the sudden?

“What? I said I love you. I can’t say I love you?” you smile at his reaction. “L-like you love me?” He is indirectly asking for your clarification of what kind of love you mean.

“Yes, Taehyung. I love you. You’re probably the bestest friend I have ever had.”

Oh. His heart sunk at the realization of the kind of love you meant. Platonic love.

Taehyung was trying to hide the disappointment in his face. He was beginning to understand why he felt disappointed. Taehyung is mentally slapping himself for being so stupid all this time.

“I love you too, __. You’re my best friend too.” He grimaced. “Do you love me more than Jimin?” You joked, giving him a pouty face. He chuckled at you, “Maybe so, __. Maybe so.” He wrapped his arms around you, and the two of you began walking towards the closest bus station.

Taehyung loved the way his arms snaked perfectly around your shoulders.

How could I have been so blind all this time?

He loved the way you rested your head onto his shoulder.

When did this happen?

He loved the way your hair smelled like. He could smell as he towered above you.

What the fuck am I supposed to do?

He adored the way you laughed at every single of his lame jokes. The way you try to joke back with him. He loved having you all to himself at this very moment.

Jimin was right this whole time.

I am-

He loved how you entered his life at the perfect moment in his life when he needed you. He needed someone that would allow him to look forward waking up everyday, look forward to the simple small things, the mundane things. Like getting coffee, taking a walk, engaging in conversations, watching movies, just existing. He felt as if he didn’t have a purpose anymore before you came; stuck in a constant boring routine, with no one to talk to. After feeling as if he was losing his bond with Jungkook, Taehyung was craving a new partner in his life. His new half, his reason view life as optimistic as he could. He didn’t realize how much he needed you in his life until now. And he loved that about you. In this very moment, Taehyung realized that he is

I am in love with __.

In love with you.

ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | 6 | ch. 7

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ggukkiereads · 2 years

Note

Hii. Can you please recommend some nerd namjoon fics...?

🌷Hi! I haven’t done a Fic Rec List for so long I glitched and I can’t remember how I usually format/share one. 👀

Will share the list in a few. Thank you! I really enjoyed this fic-rec-quest 🥰

#monovcut #namjoon nerd aus #namjoon nerd fics #namjoon nerd fic recs #namjoon fic recs #🌷 chats #I haven't posted a fic rec list for so long I forgot my tags and formatting lol

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mirisss · 1 year

Text

Never Try and Steal a Wolf’s Mate

Kim Namjoon x female reader

Wolf AU, werewolf AU, soulmates AU

Wordcount ≈ 4.7k

Warnings: possessive behavior, violence, age difference (Namjoon is 25 in this & reader is 20), I think that’s it but do let me know if you can find anything else.

Please reblog! Requests are open!

Third person POV

Tall. Handsome. Dangerous. Those are three words that perfectly describe Kim Namjoon. Everyone knows that he is someone you don’t want to cross. He’s always had a frightening vibe to him. Yet, every girl in the town would give anything to be with him because he is handsome. Very handsome.

To say that Namjoon is dangerous might be an understatement though. There is a reason why his aura is so strong that even the guys in school who were taller and more built than him would back away from him. The reason is that he’s a shifter. A wolf - some people may call it a Werewolf. However, he is more than just a wolf. He’s an alpha - a born alpha. His father sometimes struggled to raise his son as Namjoon’s alpha side surfaced from a young age. Namjoon would often lash out at anyone who got in his way or disagreed with him. His father who was the alpha at the time tried to keep Namjoon in check but his attempts did not do much. Namjoon’s alpha was strong and he wouldn’t bow down to anyone, not even his own father. As he grew up Namjoon learned to control that side of him; however even while holding back it was clear that he would win any fight that he joined. Namjoon had mastered the ability to control his temper so that he would not lash out and kill someone for nothing. Though, there is one thing that makes his blood boil more than anything. The idea of someone messing with his mate. His girlfriend. Especially since she is human. Thus, she can’t fight in the same way that he and his pack can. So if you want to see Namjoon angry, just approach his mate with the wrong look in your eyes. I promise you, you’ll face a very pissed-off Namjoon but I can’t promise that you’ll survive the experience.

So to summarize:

Name - Kim Namjoon

Age - 25

Creature - Shifter, aka wolf, aka werewolf

Position - Alpha

Tall, handsome, dangerous, very strong, and a little (more like extremely) possessive.

Now let’s meet his mate.

Short. Beautiful. Smart. Three words, of many, that describe (L/n) (Y/n). The girl that every boy in town has or has had a crush on. She’s always been top of her class in almost everything - every subject except for PE. There is one more thing, (Y/n)’s always been a little weak - no matter how much she tries she just can’t get strong, she can’t run longer than a few meters before she’s exhausted, these things have always been a struggle for her.

(Y/n) was aware that shifters and such creatures excited long before she met Namjoon, though she never knew she lived in the same town as a whole pack of them. (Y/n) was just visiting the university the day that she met Namjoon, which was also one of his last days in that very school.

So to summarize:

Name - (L/n) (Y/n)

Age - 20

Creature - Human

Position - Nerd, good girl, or smart girl (I guess)

Short, beautiful, smart, weak.

Let’s go back to how they met.

The day that the two met for the first time was quite an eventful day for both of them.

(Y/n) had for a week been planning to visit Hybe University - aka, HU. It was her dream university, it has a great reputation and it was located in her hometown. She had won a competition by writing an essay on intelligence which allowed her to visit the school during an ordinary school day - something they usually don’t allow. However, that very morning (Y/n) ended up oversleeping so she didn’t have time to really dress up rather she just threw on a pair of leggings and a hoodie before running out of the door. Though, she could only keep that pace for a few steps before she felt like she would suffocate from not being able to breathe. She realized that her only option for making it in time was to take a taxi. Luckily, many taxis passed the street she lived on even while they weren’t driving anyone already. As soon as she was inside the car and the driver knew where to take her she realized that her hair was a catastrophe. (Y/n) tried taming it with her hand but it was a futile attempt. She ended up making a low ponytail as it looked the most okay out of all the hairstyles she could think of.

While our dear (Y/n) was fighting with time, Namjoon had other things to deal with making his morning quite eventful.

Namjoon’s POV

Growls. All I felt were the vibrations in my chest formed by my growling. My body grew hotter as my anger rose. My fangs protruded out of my lips, my claws grew longer, and the wolf side of me was trying to come out - the alpha trying to take control. Why? Because two of my closest friends, who also happen to be my betas (second in commands), were fighting at 6 am… “This would have never happened if I had been in charge of the patrol all the time. You know, I’ve never messed it up. My teams always have full control over everything,” “Well, if you’re so great then how come Namjoon made me a beta after you? because he saw that you couldn’t actually handle it so he needed someone to do what you couldn’t,” “But he still chose me first,” “SHUT UP!” I said loudly in my alpha tone. My eyes had grown red, as red as fresh blood. The two betas shut their mouths and turned to me. My breathing was hard, that isn’t a good sign - it means I am struggling to hold back. “First of all. It is 6 am, why the hell are you in my house screaming at each other, at 6 fucking am?” “We’re sorry, alpha. But, this morning a rouge entered our territory. Only briefly though, we quickly found him, and then he ran off, so I came to report this as I was in charge of patrols this night,” I strained my eyes at him. “A rouge entered MY territory and I only find out about it now? Why didn’t you mind-link me when it happened, Hoseok?” “It only happened 15 minutes ago and I forgot to link you as I chased after him…” He lowered his head in submission as he felt how I let my alpha aura grow more protruding. “And you, Seokjin, why are you here?” As soon as his name left my lips, panic filled his eyes as the tone I used wasn’t a friendly one. “I happened to be awake as I heard a commotion by my house, as I looked outside I saw Hoseok chasing after the rouge just as it left the territory. I went outside to see what had happened only to find out that Hoseok had been slacking off and wasn’t patrolling as he should, so I came here to make sure you knew about it,” “It never crossed your mind that perhaps you should have contacted me at the scene?” “No alpha, sorry alpha. It slipped my mind,” I sighed. “You both may be two of my closest friends but frankly, I made you betas because I thought you were best suited for it - yes both of you as you both balance each other out but now I am starting to regret my decision and I am thinking that maybe Yoongi would have been a better choice even if he has a more hostile personality sometimes. If you two want to keep your titles then you both better start taking this seriously and work as a team, because that’s what you are. A team. Right now you’re acting like children, and I am getting tired of it. One more chance, either of you fuck up again and you both lose the title. Now get out of here, I need to get ready for school, even if I should have been able to sleep for another hour. Take care of the breach problem together, if it isn’t fixed by the time I am back from school - it will be bye-bye to the beta position…” “YES ALPHA!” Seokjin and Hoseok said in unison before they ran outside.

I went to my home gym where I keep a boxing bag. I approached the boxing bag and hit it repeatedly while adding more strength with each punch until the bag flung off the hanger from the roof. “ARGH!!!” My breathing was erratic, my sight was blurry, and the frustration kept pumping adrenalin through my body. With a couple more screams and growls, I finally managed to tame the anger and calm down. Having this power is often a good thing, few other packs try to attack us - they know it’s no use - even rouges stay far away, well most of them at least. However, this power is a pain as well. The tiniest thing can make me lash out and even one hit from me can kill someone, it’s hard to stay in control. It would be easier with a mate, an anchor, someone that would be able to calm the wolf - my alpha side - it would only cave for my mate. Unfortunately, I have not been lucky enough to find my mate yet. Most shifters find their mate when they’re around 16, I’m 23 and have yet to find them. Which is only agitating my alpha, he wants his mate and he wants them now - and honestly, I agree.

After my rampage in the gym room, I went to shower, eat some breakfast, and then went to school. Just a few more days and then I would be finished. Third person POV

Namjoon arrived at the same time he usually does, he found his younger packmates Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook before walking inside. The younger ones were joking around while Namjoon was thinking about a presentation he was to hold this afternoon when his enhanced hearing caught the sound of what seemed to be a fight. Worried that one of his packmates was involved he hurried over to the commotion.

The commotion was: (Y/n) and a bunch of people she didn’t know.

The taxi pulled up 2 minutes before (Y/n) needed to be at the entrance to meet her guide for the day. She quickly paid before she got out, she speed walked to the entrance which made her breathing a little erratic. As (Y/n) opened the door, the clock stroke 8 am which was when she was told to meet the guide. She looked around but didn’t know who she was looking for, she had only been given the name of the guide so she had no idea who to look for. The guide had her picture though, so they should be able to recognize her. Everyone inside was staring at her, she wasn’t surprised though - she looked as lost as someone expecting a wedding but ending up at a funeral. “Hey there pretty girl, what are you doing here?” Some guy walked up to her and frankly, he walked up way too close to her. Her breathing was still erratic, her nerves weren’t helping either. (Y/n) hoped that if she didn’t look at him he would back away. “I, uh, I’m here to visit. I’m waiting for a guide,” The guy was annoyed by her avoiding eye contact so he decided to fix that, by putting his hand on her chin and moving her head up. Though, just as he was about to touch her someone spoke up. “Ya! Minhyuck, back off. You’re just being disgusting acting like this,” It was a girl, she was tall - well taller than the average female. “Don’t but in Han Sora,” (Y/n) jerked her head to the female, Han Sora - that was the name of her guide. A crowd formed around them, Sora walked up to the guy, and (Y/n), as she stood in front of them Sora grabbed ahold of (Y/n)’s arm and pulled her to her side. (Y/n) was immediately thinking that she would have a bruise on her arm within an hour, she always bruised very easily as well. The guy just wouldn’t back down no matter what Sora said.

Namjoon turned a corner and he was now close enough to hear the actual words being said and not just noise. It was Minhyuck causing trouble with some girl again. Fortunately, Minhyuck wasn’t a shifter however Sora was. Thus, making this a problem for him. If someone from his pack is involved in a fight he has to make sure they don’t kill whoever they are fighting. His alpha was pushing inside his head the closer they got, he didn’t understand why, this wasn’t bad enough for Namjoon to need to go full alpha. Namjoon didn’t understand until he saw the commotion, until he saw the girl being protected by Sora. As soon as his eyes landed on that girl, his inner wolf loudly roared mate. Sora, step back. I got this. Yes, alpha. Sora turned around to face (Y/n), “Hey, let’s go over here,” Namjoon was about to lash out at Sora for touching his mate when Minhyuck decided he had the opportunity to do something to Sora. His body language clearly showed that he had the intention of pushing Sora which would result in her falling on top of Namjoon’s mate. Right before Minhyuck’s hands could come in contact with Sora’s back Namjoon caught them in a tight grip which allowed Sora to pull (Y/n) with her to the side. Minhyuck was frozen as he looked up at Namjoon with a terrified face, the senior seemed to be ready to kill him. This was not Namjoon’s first time lecturing Minhyuck, though this time was probably the one time Namjoon shouldn’t have been the one to stand before Minhyuck. The reason for that is, for the first time in many years, Namjoon had almost no control over his wolf - so the possibility och him killing Minhyuck was very big. Sora could feel her alpha’s anger growing, she knew that she needed to find some way to bring the human side of Namjoon to the surface. Sora herself wouldn’t be enough to come in contact with him, but (Y/n) would definitely do the trick.

“(Y/n), I need you to do something for me” Sora whispered, “What?” (Y/n) answered with a low tone, but it was enough to catch Namjoon’s attention. Sora noticed that as soon as (Y/n) said ‘what’ Namjoon tilted his head so that he could see the two of them in his peripheral vision. “I need you to scream Namjoon, and I need you to do it like now. Or something really bad is going to happen,” (Y/n) gave Sora a confused look, after thinking about it for a few seconds she nodded.

While Sora spoke with (Y/n), Namjoon had cornered Minhyck against a wall. He was breathing heavily, his eyes shifting between his usual warm brown and his blood-red, his claws and fangs were on the verge of protruding. The only thought in his mind was to kill the one who tried to steal his mate. Namjoon himself was fighting his wolf on this matter, Namjoon knew that he shouldn’t kill Minhyuck no matter how much he actually wanted to. But eventually, his wolf won. He raised his fist, a low growl rumbling from deep within his chest, his eyes were no longer shifting between his human and wolf eyes - they were now staying as the blood-red glowing eyes. Namjoon pulled his fist back a little before he shot it forward.

“NAMJOON!!”

Right before his fist came in contact with Minhuck’s face he stopped. The human side is back in control. Namjoon pushed Minhyuck aside, “Don’t ever try something like this again. Okay?” “Yeah,” Namjoon turned to see Sora holding the girl who was shaking like a leaf. Sora, bring her with you to our section room. I’ll meet you there, I just need to calm down a little more first. Sora nodded before Namjoon left.

“Hey, (Y/n). Come with me, I’ll take you to a room where you can rest a little and then we can begin the tour. Or we can fix a new day for you to have a look around if today has been too much for you,” “Okay,” Sora lead the way to the section room that belonged to the club of Lycans - which too many people were a club for the strong, popular, and inhumanly attractive people but in reality, it was for the shifters in school. As soon as (Y/n) read the name of the club on the door, she knew what had happened. That was when she understood who and what Namjoon was.

Namjoon was a wolf shifter. And (Y/n), was his mate.

(Y/n)’s POV

Sora opened the door and let me walk in first, I immediately localized a couch and sat down on it. “You okay?” “Sora, are you a shifter?” “What? How did you know?” “I’ve sort of always known that these mythological creatures existed but I didn’t know that some lived in the same town as me.” “Well, yeah. You’re right, I’m a wolf shifter,” “And so is Namjoon, right? In fact, he’s the alpha isn’t he?” Just as I asked that the door opened again, and in walked Namjoon. “Yes, that is correct. I am the alpha,” Although he spoke with such confidence I could see his eyes shaking with uncertainty, the uncertainty of how I would respond to all of this. He walked over and sat down beside me while still keeping some space between us. “I think I’ll leave now and give the two of you some space if that is alright with everyone?” Sora began walking towards the door. Namjoon looked at me to see what I would answer, he was alright with being alone with me but the question was if I was alright with being alone with him. “Yeah, that’s okay,” I heard Namjoon letting out a relieved breath as Sora waved goodbye before she left the room. I slightly turned my body so that I was facing Namjoon instead of facing away from him, Namjoon did the same thing. “So… you’re a wolf shifter and an alpha…” “Yeah…” He awkwardly scratched at his neck, avoiding my eyes. Surely, he was nervous about telling me I was his mate. “Did you react that way because Sora was involved or was it because of me?” “It was because of you, Sora can handle herself, she’s never a problem for me. But I almost lost control out there, I only came back to it because you shouted my name. It only happened because you’re my mate and someone was threatening you,” “So, I am your mate? What does that mean?” “It basically means that we are soulmates. That you are the only one who can keep me calm, who I will listen to, the only one I would bow down to. The only one I could ever truly be in love with. Though, it’s different for you. As you’re not a shifter, you’re not as affected by this. I have no choice but to be with you, but you can choose if you want me or not,” “What would happen if I said no?” “I would go through excruciating pain for the rest of my life and I would become a monster because I wouldn’t be able to hold back my wolf so I would kill anyone who stood in my way, but I want you to know that if you don’t want me then that is okay. I’ll find a way to manage everything, I don’t want to pressure you into this.” “When do I have to answer?” “Before the next full moon or my wolf will end up seeking you once the moon has risen in the sky. If he ends up finding you, he will mark you meaning you have no choice but to accept me,” “Okay, the full moon is in 2 weeks, right?” “yeah,” “How about we try and get to know each other during these two weeks and then I’ll give you my answer?” “That sounds great,” Namjoon gave me a big smile that revealed adorable dimples. Cute. I gave him a smile in return. “This might be a bit weird, but would it be alright if I hugged you, for a few seconds?” “Um, why?” “Just to calm my wolf, he’s still worried that something happened to you but if we could hold you we would both calm down,” “Okay, just a few seconds though,” Namjoon nodded before he moved his arms so they were wrapped around me and then he pulled me forward into his chest. He was warm, I could feel how strong he was, even though I knew that this man could turn into a beast and kill me within a second I felt strangely safe within his embrace. He smelled of burned cedar wood, it was a nice scent for him. He held his promise and let go of the hug after 7 seconds, just a few seconds he had said. For some reason, I was a little disappointed over the hug ending but I knew more chances would come. “Hey, you came here to check out the school, right?” “Yeah, I did. Sora was supposed to be my guide but she said we could schedule another day if I didn’t want to do it today.” “How about I show you around? No one will mess with you and we can spend some time together and get to know one another” “That sounds nice,” “Great, come on!” During the tour I found out that Namjoon was a senior meaning this was one of his last days here, it also meant that he was 5 years older than me. I was a little worried about what my parents would think but then I remembered that they too already knew of shifters so I wouldn’t have to explain much to them.

Third Person POV

And that was how the two met for the first time. Fast forward two weeks from that day and (Y/n) told Namjoon that she accepted to be his mate - which made him very happy and resulted in him marking her right then. Now, let us go to the couple celebrating their 2-year anniversary.

Namjoon’s POV

I had, with the help of Seokjin and Yoongi, prepared a fancy meal for my date with (Y/n). We would be eating at home but I didn’t want her to cook or for us to order food so I said I would cook. However, I happen to be a terrible chef, thus I asked two of my betas - yes I ended up making Yoongi a beta as well because Seokjin and Hoseok just kept arguing over stupid things so Yoongi is the beta in charge of the betas - who are excellent chefs to help me out, which honestly means that they did everything and I watched from afar.

It’s our two-year anniversary since we became a couple and mates. I really wanted to do something special, since our first year anniversary wasn’t celebrated the way I had preferred… My heat, or rut, ended up coming at that time because it had been a year since I marked (Y/n) but we hadn’t engaged in any spicy activities because we wanted to wait. However, my heat had other plans. (Y/n) was very willing to help me out so it worked out nicely, however my vision for our first anniversary had not been to be a sex-crazed beast for 3 days straight… Therefore, our second anniversary was very important to me. It had to be perfect to make up for last year and to show her how much I love her.

~ A few minutes after Seokjin and Yoongi left ~

I was anxiously waiting for (Y/n) to arrive, I didn’t like being away from her. She is just so precious to me and I would hate for something bad to happen to her. During these two years, I have gotten to know her very well. We really do complement each other, (Y/n) is quite weak while I am very strong physically speaking, however, when it comes to mentality she is far stronger than me.

(Y/n) had been at the university before she would come here, and she said that she would get ready there. I told her to dress fancy, which also made me worry about her getting ready at school… All those people who were interested in her would surely try to steal her away if they saw her in one of her fancy outfits. I mean, she looks good in anything but there’s just something about her fancy outfits, the vibe of them, and just how confident she is when she wears them.

A rhythmic knock landed on the front door. I walked over and opened it. “Hello, my love,” “Hello to you too, Namjoon,” I looked her over, wow. She really did dress fancy, though the thing that made me the happiest was to see her smile and her eyes that were full of adoration and love. Although, the fact that her shoulders were uncovered, showing off the mating mark was a close contender for first place. I let her in and we walked over to the table. “This is wonderful, but I guess you had some help, didn’t you?” I scratched my neck like I usually do when I am embarrassed or nervous. “Yeah, Soekjin and Yoongi helped me cook and prepare pretty much everything,” “I didn’t expect anything else, I actually prefer knowing they helped out so that I can safely eat the food. I love you Kim Namjoon, but cooking is not for you,” “Ya ya, I know. I love you too, my (Y/n)” We then sat down and ate the food while conversing about everything and nothing.

“You know, I guess we have Minhyuck to thank for our relationship,” “What do you mean? Why would we thank that asshole? He tried to hit on you…” “Yeah, but if he hadn’t caused a commotion, you wouldn’t have met me that day. So, if it wasn’t for him being an asshole and you almost killing him, we wouldn’t have met… At least, not that day,” “I guess you’re right, I still regret not hitting him. It would have taught him to never try and steal a wolf’s mate. Especially my mate,” (Y/n) burst out in a laughing fit. “Oh Namjoon, believe me. He knows he shouldn’t have done that. And he never tried anything again. Even though he had an entire year without you in the school when he could have done something, he didn’t. In fact, every time he saw me approaching he would turn and run the other way while looking around him. He was terrified that you would show up and beat him up for only being in the same room as me,” “To be honest, had I been there, I definitely would have done that,” “I know, you’re overprotective and everything but trust me. No one at school dares try anything like that with me because everyone knows I’m dating the very scary CEO of Kim Corporations and some know that I am even dating an alpha,” I stood up and walked over to her, pulling her up from her chair and close to me. “I love you, (Y/n). I’m so happy that you are my mate and that you accepted me as yours,” “I love you too, Namjoon. I wouldn’t want anyone else, not when I can have you,” I leaned down and gave her a passionate kiss that she instantly reciprocated. The rest of the night was, well.. let’s just say it was heated, but neither of us would have wanted it any other way.

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whoseafraidofliloleme · 10 months

Text

𝐄𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝.

Summary: Kang YN was only in London to support her sister. Instead she finds love.

W/c: 4.3k 😂.

Genres/Tropes: Written One Shot. Regency au. Bridgerton au. Strangers to lovers. Love at first sight. Fluff. Comedy. I'm not the nicest to Eloise and I am not going to apologise for it.

Permanent Taglist: @honeyhuii @chirokookie @nyxtwixx @clar-iii @centheodd @prdxinvade @hiqhkey @junnniiieee07 @love-4-keum @acciomylove @sproutswonies @youkwim @kpoplover718 @anotherimaginesaccount @ashxxgyu @bubblytaetae @strwberrydinosaur @xiaoderrrr @shinkenprincess-oh

AN: This was supposed to be short and simple, a little fun one shot, Instead Im here with over 4,000 words. This has been a labour of love that I've spent the last week writing so feedback will be very appreciated please. Cause it's so long there's a read more 😂.

Enhypen Masterlist

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

You did not want to be here. This was only the first ball of the season, and you were already done with it all. The only reason you even agreed to come for this season was because you wanted to help Jennie unnie.

A new Duchess, somehow Jennie unnie had become a favourite of the Queen’s and for that reason, you had been roped into coming and helping her out. You didn’t hate that, you thought your brother-in-law, one Kim Namjoon, Duke of Kennington was pretty cool.

That’s a lie, when you first met the guy, you thought he was the biggest nerd ever. It didn’t surprise you in the slightest that your well read, always curious sister found her soulmate in a genius.

They were adorable from start of last season till now. However, what you didn’t want was for Jennie unnie to rope you into helping her for this new season. After the drama of last season, you just wanted to fade into obscurity.

But no, you were stuck at this ball, doing Jennie unnie’s bidding. Looking around and taking notes about what went well and didn’t at Lady Danbury’s ball so you can report to Jennie unnie of how she could make her ball the best on of this season.

The small reprieve was that you’d made friends with Penelope Featherington, who was a brilliant young lady, with wit and charm. You didn’t understand how she wasn’t married to some equally handsome and wealthy lord.

The gentlemen of the ton if you were being honest left much to be desired. These so-called gentlemen. You’d read Lady Whistledown and done your own research into the most popular of them.

You knew Penelope held a flame for the third Bridgerton son but really after what he’d said about her, you personally wouldn’t forgive him but from conversations with Penelope revealed, she was more than ready to forgive if there was a good reason.

Jennie unnie and you had worked hard to make Penelope shine this season, getting her out of the control of her horrible mother, was only the first step. Getting her wonderfully made dresses that suited her was the next. And now here at this ball, making use of your knowledge and your brother’s connections to get Penelope on the radar of the type of gentlemen who would be perfect for her.

You were proud to say that this plan of yours was working. Penelope was happily dancing with a Lord Justin Jeon and from the looks of it, he seemed quite taken with her.

“Miss YN, how is Jennie unnie and brother-in-law? Are they well, Namjoon hasn’t replied to my letters” You heard Mr Benedict Bridgerton. So busy in watching Penelope, you hadn’t seen him come and stand next to you with his younger sister Eloise.

“Unnie is great, Namjoon oppa hasn’t broken anything in quite a few days so all is well in their household. I don’t know why you are worried about your letters not being replied to when you seem to come and crash at my brother’s residence every day it would seem Mr Bridgerton” You replied, turning to give him a smile.

You did like Benedict Bridgerton, he was a good sort and a very good friend to your brother-in-law. What you didn’t like was his younger brother and sister who unfortunately was scowling, looking at Penelope dancing.

“The sister of last season’s diamond shouldn’t be standing on the outskirts of the ball, I say this dance is almost ending. Would you give me the pleasure of the next dance my lady?” Benedict said smiling at you. You couldn’t help but giggle at what he said.

He knew as well as you did that you didn’t enjoy dancing, you never had. Too many instances of having your foot stepped on by men and consequently broken feet because of them had led to you apprehension.

Thankfully you were saved from replying as Penelope and Lord Jeon returned to where you were standing. The bright smile Penelope was wearing had faded in seeing Eloise who from the looks of it was attempting to murder Penelope with her eyes.

The atmosphere had gone from jovial to tense, in a way even Lord Jeon could feel it. Seeing Eloise was seconds away from erupting on Penelope, you made the choice to lead her away, taking her arm without saying anything to the others around and took her towards the refreshments table.

You never got there however as you were bumped into by a gentleman. It seemed like he had been pushed by his friends as they were standing by watching with wide eyes and Penelope looked at you are wondering what your reaction was going to be.

The shock of being bumped into you faded in seconds as you realised that there was lemonade running down the front of your dress. You looked down at your ruined dress, it wasn’t a favourite of yours, but you were still mad, this gentlemen had ruined your dress. You looked up at him ready to shout at him, propriety be damned.

That’s when you noticed the group of gentlemen that had pushed this gentleman in your way. Viscount Park Jimin was laughing with his stupid friends. Not caring about the poor boy who was apologising to you, ignoring him and Penelope’s attempts at calming you down. You made your way to him.

Not expecting you to come to him, Jimin looked at you in shock as you stood in front of him in anger. Although he had expected your anger, he was hoping it would be aimed at the boy he sent to spill his drink on you. Then again, he did want your attention for a reason.

“Milord, you think you are so very funny but in reality, you are not funny and showing yourself to be a child” you said scathingly. This man, he did not deserve to be called a gentleman with how he acted, and you had been dealing with him since before Jennie unnie got married to Namjoon oppa. You didn’t know why he took so much joy out of making fun of you or teasing you.

“Oh, such words from such a pretty mouth, does your dear brother and sister know you have a tongue as sharp as knives” Jimin said, his eyes gleaning with amusement. Every interaction proved his hunch about you correct.

You were the perfect lady for his younger brother. Now all he had to do was get you to interact, fall in love and his younger brother would be set for life. Not to mention, he would get the acute joy of being the annoying older brother that Namjoon wasn’t in your life.

Not dignifying Jimin with an answer, you walked away and went back to Penelope. Telling her that the two of you were leaving.

At home, you ranted and raved to Jennie unnie and brother about how much Park Jimin got on your nerves. Namjoon oppa just laughed, knowing that Jimin only did it to get under your skin and he was testing to see if you were a good match for his younger brother.

Jennie unnie, played the part of sympathetic sister but inwardly thought it was quite good that you’d found your match in terms of arguing, bantering and messing around with.

A few days later, your small little family was having a picnic, you were telling Penelope about some of the shenanigans that came with Jennie unnie’s wedding. Things that never made it into Lady Whistledown.

Your sister stopped you to tell you about how you were having guests for dinner.

“Unnie why are you inviting that heathen of a man Viscount Park. Is it not bad enough that I must deal with him at all the balls, now you want me to have dinner with the man too” You whined. You knew Jimin liked to wind you up and it annoyed you to no end that he succeeded in annoying you. Being made to play nice at dinner was the last thing you wanted.

“My dear sister, we are meeting his younger brother, I haven’t seen Sunghoon since the lad went off to university, you’d like him you know, he’s a good sort” Namjoon oppa told you smiling at the way you refused to admit that despite all the annoying each other, You and Jimin did share a strong sibling bond.

“Well, if he’s anything like that man, I do not want to make his acquaintance” you said before turning to Penelope.

“Do you think if we just turn up at Lady Danbury’s for dinner tomorrow, she’ll kick us out?” you asked Penelope. Who laughed at the absurdity of your suggestion, of course Lady Danbury would kick you out for turning up uninvited.

Logically you knew this but it was nice making Penelope laugh, she had been sombre in the last few days since that unfortunate ball where you had lemonade thrown on you and in the time you went to confront Jimin.

Eloise Bridgerton had found Penelope and it was lucky that the second oldest Bridgerton daughter had left by the time you got there because by the way Penelope had looked, you already annoyed would’ve lashed out at her.

“Madame, I’d think you should meet me before judging me on my brothers’ atrocious manners” A voice you didn’t recognise remarked from behind you. Turning around you saw a beautiful man, with the most alluring brown eyes, his hair styled in the way most men styled their hair but it looked royal on him.

He wasn’t wearing anything extraordinary, but he looked fascinating. You had never cared for handsome men. They were dime a dozen in the London ton but there was something about this handsome gentleman, you wanted to know more about him.

A throat clearing, had you turning to look at your sworn enemy. Park Jimin was smirking at you. Why was he smirking, you still felt in a daze, you hadn’t recovered from gazing at the most handsome man you’d ever seen. It took you a few more seconds to blink and regain your mind.

That is when you made the connection. The reason Jimin was smirking at you, somehow this pest of a man was related to the most handsome man you’d just seen. This was horrible.

Jimin wanted to burst out laughing. You and Sunghoon had been staring at each other for much longer than should have been allowed. The way you both were gazing into each other’s eyes.

If Jimin believed, he would think this was love at first sight. His matchmaking skills were brilliant, last season he got Jennie and Namjoon hyung together and now this season he will get his brother and you together. Maybe with one son married, his mother will leave him alone about marriage.

Sunghoon couldn’t believe he was in the presence of a literal goddess. This lady, sitting with Namjoon hyung and who he presumed was Namjoon hyungs wife and Miss Penelope Featherington. She was the type of lady the poets wrote poems about, the type of beauty that caused wars. He had been blessed by the gods that this beautiful lady was gazing at him.

Sunghoon had been ready to snap at his Jimin hyung when he cleared his throat and took your attention away from him. But in looking at his hyung, he saw that self-satisfied look in his eye. Oh lord help him, his brother planned this. He had something up his sleeve.

In any other situation, Sunghoon would try to get out of whatever scheme his brother had cooked up. They generally didn’t end well for Sunghoon, it was either lectures from his mother or lectures from his father.

He hasn’t decided which was worse, his father’s disappointment or his mother’s exasperation at his antics. Even though he tried to explain that it was never his fault but no one believed him.

His hyung was an expert at getting out of trouble and making sure that Sunghoon got into it. However, in this case if it involved this beautiful lady, he would happily go along with his hyungs scheme. For once this scheme would be in his favour, he would get to reap the benefits of it.

“So, YN are you still unhappy about Jimin and his brother joining us for dinner” Jennie unnie teased. Glaring at her, you saw everyone looking at you are awaiting your reply. The temptation to get up and run was real but that was far from lady like behaviour. Thankfully you were saved from replying by a sudden unexpected summer storm.

The rain saved you and you would forever be grateful to that. The rain also gave you a wonderful view of handsome men in wet clothing. You knew Jennie unnie was admiring Namjoon oppa, Penelope was very openly looking at Jimin’s six pack that had become obvious with his shirt sticking to his chest. In that same vein, you were having the time of your life looking at Park Sunghoon, dripping wet.

Dinner that night was an interesting affair for the whole family. Jennie unnie, Namjoon oppa and Jimin were not even hiding the fact that they’re matchmaking scheme was working brilliantly. Penelope was amazed at how you went from a young lady that never blushed or cared for a gentlemen’s attention, was preening, swooning and smiling beautifully at Park Sunghoon.

Then again Park Sunghoon was acting the exact same way. Penelope had never seen a man prouder of himself for being the reason a lady smiled. It was adorable to see how enchanted with each other you both were.

Penelope had the privilege of seeing a love match being made right in front of her eyes. She’d seen the previous matches of Daphne and Anthony; it was known in the ton that Bridgerton’s only ever had love matches.

Penelope had even had a hand in helping these couples. Probably not in the best way but her whole point was to show a mirror to the ton of their hypocrisies. It made sense why Eloise hated her, most of the time Penelope hated herself for what she had done. Penelope shook her head, looking back at the sweet beginnings of a love she hoped would last a lifetime.

You couldn’t help yourself in how you kept glancing at Sunghoon. That felt new, he had given you leave to use his first name. It felt almost illegal to be able to say his first name. This man had come out of nowhere into your life and it was only the second meeting, first actual conversation and you wanted all his attention on you all the time.

You wanted to unravel all his secrets, know each and every thing about him. Stand by his side during the bad, horrible and absolutely dreadful times. You also wanted to be there during the good, happy and blissfully content times.

You didn’t believe in love at first sight but that is what it seemed to be happening here with you. You didn’t understand it, how did this man completely make you want to live a life as his wife when you barely knew each other.

“That is what courting is for dear sister, to get to know this man you want to spend your life with” You turned to Jennie unnie confused and then looked around the dining room, the men it seemed had gone into the smoking room, not that any of the men smoked but they were probably gossiping more than you ladies were. It wasn’t unheard for you to get so carried away in your own thoughts that you completely miss what is going on around you.

“Did I completely miss the end of dinner? Lord help me I’m making such a fool in front of Sunghoon” You cried appalled, this was just what you needed for your future husband to think that you were one of those ladies that spent more time wool gathering than actually doing lady like pursuits.

Namjoon once, the men were in his office. Turned to Sunghoon. He knew exactly what he wanted to say to his maybe not even maybe future brother in law. After tonight’s dinner it was only a matter of time before Sunghoon became a part of your small little family.

“Sunghoon it should go without saying that my priority is my sister. You have no doubt heard from your brother how dear she is to me. Therefore, I should let you know that you aren’t the only person to come enquiring about YNs hand, whether it be wanting to court her or bringing a proposal” Namjoon told Sunghoon and Jimin. Though he was sure that it didn’t mean anything as YN had told him her opinions of these various gentlemen and the simple fact that she didn’t like them enough to marry or be courted by them.

Jimin looked at Namjoon confused, this information was something Namjoon had kept from him, which was unfair of him. Jimin should be aware of how much competition his brother has. More importantly Jimin needs to know their names so he can tell them to back off from his future sister-in-law.

Sunghoon didn’t know how to react to the information presented to him. He was at war with himself about how to react with this information.

On the one hand there was jealousy and the other hand there as fear. He was jealous of the gentlemen that had shown interest in you already and the fear was what if you already had feelings for one of these gentlemen.

Which wasn’t an issue, he was willing to fight for you. If he had to show you that he was the perfect gentlemen for you then he will. This dinner only solidified his feelings for you and now he couldn’t wait to court you.

“Namjoon hyung, I will be asking YN to dance with me twice at the next ball and before I leave tonight, I’d like to ask for her hand in courting. Her opinion is first and foremost to me, even more than yours hyung” Sunghoon said. He knew that what he said was out there and that this might ruin his standing with Namjoon hyung. But it was important for Namjoon hyung to know where exactly he stood when it came to you.

“You want to court me? After the fool I’ve been making of myself in front of you” Sunghoon heard YN say from behind him. He turned to look at her, there she was standing behind him asking him the silliest question. Which solidified that he was falling in love with the right person for him.

“Madame, you have intrigued me from the beginning and the more I find out the more I want to sit with you and talk about every single thing in the world. Not just that but I hate balls, the fakeness of these events is tiring to say the least but with you, I want to go to every ball because it gives me the opportunity to dance with you, show off to the entire ton that I have the most beautiful lady on my arm” Sunghoon said, looking you straight in the eye. He was praying that this speech of his had endeared you to him, that he had a chance to win your love.

You didn’t know how to reply to him. This was something that you dreamed of. Finding the man of your dreams, who saw you and wanted to get to know you. This was unreal and you were so shocked that you just nodded to his question. You couldn’t wait to start this new adventure.

That night was spent staying up with Jennie unnie and Penelope giggling about the fact that you were now courting and you had a suitor.

Since Sunghoon had become your suitor. You didn’t have a dull day. Everyday there were flowers coming from Sunghoon. You didn’t know much about the language of flowers but Penelope took much pleasure in telling you all the meanings of the flowers Sunghoon was sending you.

It was getting to the point that Jennie unnie was giving the flowers away because she had run out of rooms to put the flowers in. With the flowers, Sunghoon would come calling, as early was allowed for men to come calling.

At some point, Namjoon oppa told Sunghoon to just come for breakfast. So, for the last few weeks you’d been having breakfast with Sunghoon. If Sunghoon couldn’t come in the morning, then he would come around in the afternoon to take you on promenades.

Every single ball that you both found yourselves at, Sunghoon was writing his name in your dance card. Making sure that he was dancing with you for your favourite dances.

If you were being honest, you knew you were in love with Sunghoon. How could you not fall in love with this gentleman that was doing all that he could to make you his. Every conversation that you had, the things that you kept on finding out about this man was making you fall deeper and deeper in love with him. You had confided in Jennie unnie and Penelope that if Sunghoon didn’t propose soon then you would be asking him to marry you. Unheard of for women to be the one asking but you were getting impatient and wanted to marry Sunghoon already.

Now it was halfway through the season, and you were having the time of your life being courted and falling in love with the gentleman courting you. Jennie Unnie’s ball was tonight, it was the marking of the halfway point of the season. It was crazy that you didn’t want to be a part of this season and now you were having so much fun that you didn’t want the season to end.

Your sister and brother-in-law were greeting people and you were around the ballroom making sure everything was going well there.

Penelope was going back and forth with you about the dinner table and kitchen. Making sure its all going perfectly. The Queen had already made her appearance, she seemed very happy with this ball.

She made a small speech and then left in a flamboyant manner fitting of a queen. She was also very interested in your courtship with Sunghoon. You were pretty sure she had told Jennie unnie that she would sponsor the wedding.

A hand on your arm made you turn to the person who touched you. Seeing that it was Sunghoon you smiled. He tilted his head towards the orchestra that were starting to play music for the waltz. Nodding your head, you let him lead you onto the dancing area. Holding you close, both of you danced. You thought it would be similar to your other dances. Neither of you were a fan of talking during dances so you enjoyed the silence when you danced. Just the music and Sunghoon holding you close were the only things that mattered.

“The last few months have been the most wonderful times of my life. Never have I been happier that I listened to Jimin hyung and came to London for the season. My life was boring and without colour before you Kang YN. You have brought fun, excitement and a whole rainbow into my life. I just have one question, will you do me the honour of being my wife?” Sunghoon said as you were dancing. You looked at him in shock. Did he just propose while you were dancing, had you just imagined that you didn’t know what just happened.

“Milady if you are going to reject me, please let me know” Sunghoon said as he walked with you from the dance floor to where you had been before standing with Penelope.

Turning to Sunghoon to give him his reply, you stopped. Just looked in his eyes, you both had a few conversations in those moments, unsaid words, things neither of you were brave enough to voice but could be conveyed through your eyes.

“Well after such an impassioned proposal, how can I say no.” You said to Sunghoon a little loudly. Knowing that all those around you were listening to this conversation. After hearing what you said, Jennie unnie came barrelling towards you and swept you into a hug. She was so happy for you. Namjoon oppa was happy you were happy, and it was so obvious how much Sunghoon loved you. Once your sister let go of you, Namjoon oppa gave you a short hug and let Penelope hug you tightly as well. After the hug, you saw Jimin smirking at you.

“I am not living with this man. Once we are married, your brother is not allowed in our home” You said to Sunghoon, that made both men laugh but Jimin stopped when he saw that you had a blank expression. You were being serious. Just as he was going to retort, you burst out laughing.

“Oh dear sister, you had me there. I was about to use my status to make sure I can visit my brother and new sister” Jimin said jokingly. He would never pull rank on you and Sunghoon. He would turn up regardless of your wishes anyway but you both knew that the teasing was your way of showing affection to each other.

“Well now we have to tell the Queen, shes very adamant that this wedding she sponsors ends better than the last one” Jennie unnie said. She was slightly put out that she wouldn’t get to plan your wedding like you had helped her.

But with the Queen footing the bill, you had to go with whatever she wanted. Although considering the Queen wanted this wedding to be a success, she may be more willing to let you sisters have the things you wanted at your wedding.

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

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kpopfanfictrash · 5 months

Text

The Ten Days of Ex-Mas (Teaser)

Posting Date: Tuesday, December 19th, 7:00 PM CT

Creative Collaborator: @kithtaehyung FOR THIS AMAZING BANNER!

Genre: Holiday / Second Chance!AU / Hockey!AU

Pairing: Jimin / Reader (F)

Length: One Shot

Synopsis: Three months following the worst break-up of your life, you finally feel ready to start moving on. The world, it seems, has other ideas when you pick up the phone and find your ex-boyfriend calling.

Jimin Park, star right winger of the NHL and (until recently), the love of your life, has a very large problem. Despite the courage he regularly shows on the ice, in his personal life, Jimin is kind of a coward. When you broke up this fall, he could barely admit it. Not to his neighbors. Not to his friends. Not even to his family, who are expecting him home for Christmas. In a desperate plea for more time, Jimin begs you to pretend you’re still dating – and to his surprise, you agree. Faced with a second chance, Jimin is determined not to squander it. If only fixing a relationship were as easy as falling in love.

Author’s Note: Part of the Jingle All the Way collaboration!

Estimated WC: 45K (... whoops; this will probably be multiple parts)

Rating: 18+

Preview: 2,141

Y/N POV

You should have known better than to trust Namjoon with your dating life.

Yoongi never would have put you in this situation. The more level-headed of your two best friends, Yoongi approaches matters of the heart with the same rationality he does everything else. Namjoon, on the other hand, is a great guy – who is notoriously bad at reading other people.

The number of times you’ve been forced to step in and save him from phone scams is astounding. It’s not his fault, really – Namjoon trusts too easily, which doesn’t serve him well in this world. He’s always willing to give others the benefits of the doubt, which gets him into trouble.

And now you, by extension, having accepted the blind date he proposed.

Mike Davis moved into Namjoon’s building two months ago, and Namjoon has been adamant since the start that you two would hit it off.

“He goes to all the same conventions you do,” he assured you last week on the phone.

“Which conventions?” you asked, squinting hard at the wall. “I know you’re not big into nerd culture, Namjoon, so as an FYI – not all cons are considered equal.”

Namjoon rattled off a few you’d attended, impressing you enough to agree despite the initial disinterest. This agreement may have been spurred by tonight being the three-month anniversary of the worst break-up of your life.

Almost as soon as you sat, you realized your mistake. While you may have reached a point where you don’t cry every time your ex’s name is mentioned, the prospect of dating someone else is an entirely different matter. Getting dressed up felt strange, as did traveling to the restaurant and waiting for Mike at the bar.

The fact that Mike called this place a ‘restaurant’ should have been your first clue, as Hat Trick is most definitely a sports bar – specifically, a hockey bar. Had you known (really, you should have known), you wouldn’t have gone, but you were nervous and trying to make a good impression. Upon arriving, you arranged yourself awkwardly on a sticky bar stool and waited seven minutes for Mike to walk in.

Nearly an hour later, you find yourself regretting coming at all. Mike excused himself two minutes ago for the bathroom and as soon as he left, you sagged with relief.

He’s a nice guy, you suppose. Good looking, with light brown curls and dark eyes. You can see why Namjoon thought he might be good for you – Mike is the exact opposite of your ex in many ways. Constantly frazzled, he arrived late to the bar, only to immediately duck outside because he forgot to pay the parking meter. Jimin was the type to unpack his suitcase immediately after reaching the hotel and brought several chargers in case one of them died.

Once the meter was paid, Mike sat down and immediately launched into his entire life story. You suppose you should have been happy about this, since lack of communication ended your last relationship but instead, found yourself overwhelmed.

Mike finally paused for breath once your drinks arrived, allowing you a moment to answer his questions. The moment you said you ran a pretty popular cosplay TikTok, Mike instantly shifted from arrogant to insecure.

“I can’t believe you came,” he exhaled with a shake of his head. “When Namjoon showed me your picture, I said no way would you go out with me. You’re way too beautiful.”

Somewhat awkward, you laughed. “Don’t try and get me to leave, now, Mike.”

His eyes widened, not catching your sarcasm and it took several moments to get back on track. Everything since has been downhill, so when he excused himself for the bathroom, all you felt was relief.

Digging through your purse, you pull out your phone and swipe to the group chat.

Y/N: Namjoon, WHAT possessed you to set me up with this man [7:46 PM]

Yoongi’s reply comes immediately.

Yoongi: told you it was too soon [7:46 PM]

Namjoon’s ellipses join in.

Namjoon: what! Why? What happened?? Mike didn’t try something on you, did he? [7:47 PM]

Y/N: no, no – nothing like that [7:47 PM]

Y/N: he just keeps saying how *amazing* I am and how he doesn’t know why I’m on this date at all [7:47 PM]

Yoongi: dude [7:48 PM]

Y/N: EXACTLY [7:48 PM]

Before Namjoon can respond, the bartender changes the channel and an all-too-familiar name blares over the speakers. Slowly, you look up, and all thoughts of Mike fade, faced with NHL coverage.

Nope, no – absolutely not.

Leaning over the counter, you lightly tap the bartender. “Hi.” Brightly, you smile. “First off, could I have another glass of white wine? And then, maybe… could you change the channel?”

Glancing around, the guy shakes his head. “Yes, to the wine, but no, the channel,” he says with a shrug. “Half the people in here came to watch the game. Pre-show coverage is part of that.”

With an apologetic nod, he grabs a rag and disappears. Sinking back in your seat, you stare at your hands, clasped tightly together. Your spot at the bar puts you in the unfortunate position of hearing each word the announcers say crystal-clear.

“Well, Josh, what chance do you think the Blackhawks have tonight?”

The silver-haired man beside him bobs his head. “Steve, I’d say their chances are pretty darn good. You’ve seen this team’s early games. Their first line is strong, especially now that Park’s back.”

“Oh, absolutely – Jimin Park has been crucial in the last couple of games. He was sorely missed last season.”

“Ha! You can say that again.”

Trying to hide your wince, you clasp your hands tighter as a fresh glass of wine is set down. “Thanks,” you mutter, downing half in one gulp.

Immediately, your plans for later tonight shift to accommodate another bottle of wine. Movement catches the corner of your eye, and, despite yourself, you watch the montage of star right winger, Jimin Park, tearing his way down the ice. Shamefully, you recognize every shot since, although you broke up in September, you continued to watch every game.

“One of the most talked about moments last year in hockey was the late check on Park by Blues player, Brent Howard,” continues the announcer, Josh. “His helmet came loose when he hit the boards, and he went down hard on the ice. Park suffered a sprained knee and herniated a disc in his neck. A complicated surgery took him for most of the season, only starting to skate with the team again over the summer.”

Hearing the trauma recounted with such callousness, you find yourself gripping your wine glass tighter than before.

“I don’t think anyone ever expected Park to play again,” agrees the other announcer, Steve. “It’s a damned miracle he’s back on the ice – but to return and be this good? Park has always been one of the best right wingers in the league, but I’d say he’s the best offensive player on the ice right now.”

“A bold claim!” laughs Josh. “But I might just agree. Even Jungkook Jeon on the Rangers hasn’t been matching Park in assists.”

“Exactly! I mean, look at the numbers. Last year, the Blackhawks barely made the playoffs and now, they’re first in the Western Conference.”

“Truly amazing, given the nature of his injury last November. I don’t know how familiar you are with herniated discs, Steve, but –”

Mike slides back onto his stool. Grateful for the distraction, you turn fully to face him. Having already lived through the injury once, you have no need to reminisce. Replacing your phone in your purse, you smile gamely at Mike.

“So,” you say, attempting to save the conversation. “Namjoon mentioned you like conventions? What fandoms are you a part of?”

“Oh.” Mike loosely shrugs. “I doubt you’ve heard of any of them.”

At his dismissive tone, you stiffen. Your experience with the male side of fandom is always a toss-up. “Well, there are a lot of them. Any that are more mainstream?”

He considers. “Marvel?”

Stunned, you blink once or twice. Marvel has to be one of the biggest fandoms on the planet, let alone in the country. Even if you weren’t deep in the convention circuit, you’d have heard of Marvel.

“Yeah,” you say slowly. “I think I’ve heard of that.”

“Cool, cool.” Mike nods. “Namjoon said you do cosplay – and showed me your TikTok! You know, you’d make a great Wonder Woman.”

You can practically feel your jaw tighten. “That’s DC, not Marvel. But thanks.”

Silent, you add for nothing. While you love Wonder Woman and have, in fact, cosplayed her many times, men usually only request her for one reason and that’s the skimpy outfit. Whenever you cosplay as circa 2010 Wonder Woman in pants, they’re decidedly less interested. By now, you’ve learned only to pick your characters based on personal interest.

“Have you ever cosplayed?” you ask.

Unbidden, your gaze slides to the TV. Commercial break. Stifling your twinge of disappointment, you refocus on Mike.

“Nah.” His nose wrinkles, and your stomach sinks further. “I don’t do that stuff.”

“Stuff?”

Hearing your tone, his eyes widen. “I mean, it’s cool for you. I saw your TikToks and you look amazing. I’d just look dumb,” Mike says, attempting a laugh.

Sweetly, you smile. “I don’t know. My ex used to cosplay with me, and no one ever laughed at him.”

Admittedly, this is something of a low blow since your ex-boyfriend is Jimin Park, but either Namjoon didn’t tell him, or Mike doesn’t care. Which – if that’s so, maybe Mike deserves more credit than you gave him.

“Ah.” He nods, taking a sip of his beer. “Have you ever thought about cosplaying as Wonder Woman, though?”

Your smile vanishes. Then again, maybe you’ve given him exactly the right amount of credit.

“I have,” you say. “But more recently, I’ve been cosplaying Dimension 20 characters. It’s kind of niche, but my last character was Sundry Sidney from A Starstruck Odyssey. You know – giant machine gun arm, roller skates and a mechanical eye. Oh, and a ‘fuck erotica ann’ button, of course.”

Mike’s smile freezes. “Why… would you dress like that?”

“Because it’s fun.” Finishing your glass of wine, you toss a few bills on the counter and stand. “Well, it’s been nice meeting you, Mike, but I think we’d be better off as friends. Don’t you agree?”

Even with the answer right there in the question, still he looks flummoxed.

“I…”

“Or acquaintances,” you add, pulling on your pea coat. “Or nothing at all. Whatever you prefer.”

Slinging your purse on your shoulder, you wave at the bartender and start to leave. You only make it several steps before Mike mutters something beneath his breath – loud enough that you hear.

“Stupid,” he mutters. “This is why you don’t date women like her, Mike.”

You come to a stop. Really, you should keep going. Common sense – and Namjoon’s HOA – depend on you being the bigger person and walking out. But your therapist has said you need to work on communicating, even when the message is something the other person won’t like.

Turning around, you tap Mike on the shoulder.

He glances upward, surprised – and then reddens, realizing you heard.

“Yep, I heard,” you say shortly, retracting your hand. “Was your muttering supposed to be secret?”

Mike opens, then closes his mouth, like a fish.

“What did you mean, ‘women like me?’” you demand, folding your arms. “Ones with self-respect? Or hobbies? Women who know more about a subject than you do?”

Behind the counter, the bartender snort-laughs, rising in your esteem despite the whole TV channel thing.

Mike stares at you, stunned. He seems to grow a pair in that moment though, straightening to face you on his stool. “Women with sticks up their asses,” he blurt.

Stifling an eye roll, you lean closer. “Listen, Mike,” you say, placing one hand on the counter. “If you think you can hurt my feelings – think again. Someone broke my heart three months ago, so nothing you say now will remotely compare. Do you really want to know why women like me won’t date you?”

The furrow between his brows deepens, and you take this as a sign to continue. Leaning even closer, you lower your voice.

“It’s because you’re insecure,” you say softly. “Giving someone a compliment and putting yourself down in the same sentence isn’t nice, it’s awkward. Not to mention, you’re sexist,” you add, watching him stiffen. “Telling me – a two-time Comic Con trivia champion – that I wouldn’t know Marvel is wild. Oh, and you’re a snob. Tabletop games are awesome, and cosplay is fun. Have a good night – I paid for your drink.”

With that, you turn around and march out the door to a smattering of applause from your new favorite bartender.

[ TO BE CONTINUED ]

#bangtanarmynet #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jimin fanfic #jimin fanfiction #jimin au #bts au

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vernon-s-whore · 2 years

Text

＊•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚Masterlist˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚＊

✅-Completed ❔- Ongoing

Multichapter fics (on AO3)

»❔Star Crossed-TXT »✅Artiste- Seventeen Mingyu x Fem!Reader x Vernon »❔Till Forever Falls Apart- Kim Taehyung x Original Male Character »❔Hiraeth- Enhypen »✅Nun Scio Quid Sit Amor- Seventeen Hoshi x Fem!Reader »✅Silent Night- BTS Mafia Au (Suga X Original Female Character)

Key 🍷-smut 🍡-fluff ⛔-angst ⚠️-gore+trigger warnings

Seventeen

Oneshots

Cockwarming 🍷 Boss!Kim Mingyu x Employee!Reader (fem)

My Side of the Bed🍡 Minghao x Gn!Reader (College AU)

Seventeen MTL- preference in oral 🍷

The Horangification of Us🍡 Hoshi x reader

Drabbles/ Timestamps/ And Other Depraved stuff

Things Seventeen does in a relationship (Joshua Mingyu Vernon) 🍷

Things Seventeen do in bed/relationship (Hoshi Wonwoo Minghao) 🍷

Joshua and his pretty boyfie 🍷

Joshua and his pretty boyfie but darker 🍷

Mingyu (+Namjoon) as soft doms/service tops 🍷

Seventeen Hard Hours #1 -Jeonghan and Shibari 🍷

Jeonghan and Shibari (Continued)🍷

Street racer!Wonwoo

[00:13] The yearning to see a handsome stranger at night who isn't a creep (Joshua)

[23:39] Joshua drabble

Txt

Oneshots/Series

The Best Friend Chronicles- pt 1 🍡🍷, pt 2 🍡🍷 pt 3 🍡🍷 Best Friend!Hueningkai x fem!Reader

Remote Control- pt 1 🍷 Idol!Soobin x Employee!fem!Reader

Drabbles/ Timestamps/ And Other Depraved stuff

Perv!Yeonjun drabble 🍷

[16:42] Period fluff with soobin🍡

Soobin and the lactation kink 🍷

{00:57} Soobin fluff 🍡

Headcanons about Soobin in bed🍷🍡

MTL TxT with a pregnancy kink🍷

MTL vocal in bed🍷

BTS

Oneshots/Series

Trigger warning on this one Till Forever Falls Apart- Masterlist ⚠️⛔ Kim Taehyung x Male!OC (College AU)

Drabbles/ Timestamps/ And Other Depraved stuff

Namjoon(+Mingyu) as Service top/soft dom 🍷

Enhypen

Oneshots

Just Words 🍷🍡 nerd!Jake x bag girl!reader

Stray Kids

Drabbles/ Timestamps/ And Other Depraved stuff

1:53 a.m. (Jisung x reader)🍡⛔

Ateez

Drabbles/ Timestamps/ And Other Depraved stuff

MTL 3 scenarios (fluff, smut and slightly wilder smut)

#kpop smut #svt smut #txt smut #kpop imagines #bts smut #seventeen smut #kpop masterlist #kpop fluff #kpop scenarios #taehyung smut #minghao fluff #mingyu smut #yeonjun smut #soobin smut #hueningkai smut #kpop angst #stray kids angst #bts angst

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jungkookstatts · 1 year

Note

University Superstar is 🤌🏻 Just so, SO good. I can do totally picture your JK 🫠🥴Thanks for sharing your immense talent with us🫰🏻 I’m an old ass fangirl and thought maybe if you ever decide to write asks that you could write about Namjoon with a much older artist or museum docent. 😏 I may or may not have had an exhibition or two 🖼️ and the idea that Kim Namjoon saw any of my pieces sends me… ⚰️

Kim Namjoon Drabble 1

[Summary]: Kim Namjoon is a frequent visitor at the museum you work at. In fact, he’s visited so often, he’s gained your museum's platinum gold card for passes on all exhibitions and the cafeteria’s sweet tea. You’ve come to realize that Namjoon is the biggest art nerd you’ve ever met outside of yourself when he started to find you after every exhibition and ask you questions about the artist. However, your subtle feelings for the man start to go a-wire when he beings to ask questions about you instead.

[Theme]: MuseumDocent!AU, Artist!AU, ArtNerdNamjoon!AU, Museum!AU, FriendsToLovers!AU

[Rating]: Fluffy fluff fluff; slice of life.

[Word Count]: 1,773

[A/N]: Hmmmm, this is going to be difficult. Mainly because I am only slightly younger than our golden maknae, Jjk. However, that doesn’t go to say that I haven’t read scenarios where Y/n was older than one of the members…but I also have not personally written any like that either. BUT! That doesn’t mean I can’t try. I hope this meets your expectations.

Besides, Namjoon in a museum makes me leek 🥬

[Masterlist] [Taglist]

You love this museum.

The smell of it, the look of it, the organization of it — you love it all. You love it so much, you’ve become a docent there.

Walking about the museum while you flaunt your knowledge on the various famous pieces, featured pieces, and sometimes, some of your own pieces, has been the source of your happiness for years now.

Your job never lets you down. In fact, you find that by the end of the day, your spirits have been lifted higher than what it was the last time you came home from work.

Especially nowadays.

Recently, a certain someone has been a part of nearly every single tour you have conducted within the past two weeks. He’s a tall man — sticks out like a sore thumb amongst the many old people and young children in the groups you guide. Not to mention, he's one of the most attractive people you have ever seen. Shaggy hair, brown eyes, and teeth that flash at you with every new piece of information you tell him, the man has somewhat stolen your heart. Even more so when he somehow finds you at the end of each guide to hound you for hours about the artists he found the most intriguing.

Kim Namjoon was his name, and given the many times he’s found you in the museum’s cafeteria after a guide, you’ve come to notice that the man has become such a frequent visitor he became eligible for the museum’s platinum gold membership card. Free sweet tea and admission to docent-guided tours, he took the upgrade and has since joined in on your groups.

There’s a pep and swing in your step as you make your way to work today. That twinge of nervousness you also contain shows as you shakily open the doors to the museum.

“You excited?” one of your best friends, Taehyung, asks. He’s smiling wide, clenching a pencil in his hand as he waits for your answer. You almost think he could be more excited than you with the way his eyes crinkle and his finger taps at the wood of the receptionists’ desk.

“You have no idea,” you laugh, swiping into the room that he stands in. You quickly clock in before you wipe your sweaty hands on the fabric of your skirt, hoping that your claminess goes away soon.

“I saw some of your pieces,” he faces you. “I still can’t believe those came from you! I know you’ve showed your pieces here before, but these are beyond anything I’ve ever seen you do. It’s like you went mad or something.”

You smile at his comment, a little blush forming on your face as you accept his compliment.

“That reminds me,” Taehyung grins once again. “A certain man by the name of Kim Namjoon is coming to your welcome exhibit. ‘Was the first to sign up.”

“I know,” you laugh. “He really likes art. It’s crazy how smart he is, too. I swear he grasps knowledge like a computer.”

“I dunno,” Taehyung purses his lips. “Seems he might like something else, too,”

“Stop it,” you shoot him a look. “Namjoon is an innocent nerd. Besides, I swear I’m like 10 years older than him.”

“Actually, 6 1/2,” Taehyung corrects.

“Point proven,” You observe while messing around with the computer in front of you.

“You do realize that there’s 5 other museum docents in this place, right?” your friend laughs. “Not to mention you usually conduct guides at the most inconvenient times for the general public. I doubt he’d come here and schedule tours with you if it meant he didn’t get to see you at any given moment during the week.”

“Have you ever thought of the possibility that maybe I'm just really good at my job?” you ask him teasingly.

“That’s not what I meant,” he laughs.

“I know,” you commence your teasing. “What I mean to say is, Namjoon is too… pure for that. I sincerely haven’t noticed a single flirtatious intent or ‘look in his eye’ during the multiple times he’s been here. Genuinely, he loves art and wants to know everything about it before moving on to learning about the next art style, time period, or artist he chooses to jump to next.”

“You could be right,” he looks to the door realizing that a customer has started walking up to the receptionist area. “Or he may have been asking me about you since before he started tagging along on your guides.”

----

You’re thinking about what Taehyung said all day.

He’s been asking about you? What specifically has he been asking about? And for how long has he been doing so before he started making an appearance at every guide you conducted?

Questions flood your mind, but excitement also overwhelms it.

Your exhibit has fully opened.

All your selected pieces for this have been displayed just like how you envisioned them to be. There's a crowd of people waiting to see what you’ve got, and best of all, Namjoon is there. He’s got a giant notebook in his hand, a cup of coffee in the other, and a big smile on his face as he spots you amongst the crowd.

You’re busy greeting critics, familiar faces, friends, family, and coworkers while you answer various questions and walk around the room explaining your art. You almost forget Namjoon is there until you get a free moment, and a tap on your shoulder sends a warm reminder that your eager art enthusiast has made it to your exhibit.

“I didn’t know you were an artist,” he smiles in awe while pointing to a painting near you two with the back of his pencil. “I have to say, though. Your pieces really make me think.”

“I’m no stranger to your questions, Namjoon. You know you can always ask me anything,” you blush.

“What was your muse?” he asks, still staring at the painting he pointed at. You have to turn around to look at which piece he’s talking about. Of course, this was one of your favorites out of all the pieces. You spent years on this one. Multiple trips to the same space out of the country, talks with natives, and fully immersing yourself like one. This one took the most thought and energy you’ve ever put into a piece. You’re flattered he’s mentioned this one out of all the others first.

“For this one, specifically? Or for the general theme of the exhibit?” you double-check.

“For this one — although, that was my second question,” he laughs. “I just happened to notice this one didn’t really match the theme. The rest all fall within a certain feeling, but this one caught my eye first.”

“I’m glad,” you banter. “This one is my favorite.”

“It’s mine, too,” he smirks, the warmness in his eyes flaming your entire body.

“As for the muse, it’s still hard to define,” you candor. “This one took the longest. So many stages of my 20s and mid-life crises and, well, life were all a mosh-pit of emotions on this one. I could only work on it in Iceland, too.”

“Iceland?”

“Yes,” you laugh at yourself. Saying it out loud, it sounded stranger than you thought it would. “So much inspiration came to me there. Before I knew it, I started saving the majority of my money just to travel there and work on this piece there.”

There's a pause. The business of the room engulfs you as the two of you look at your piece.

“I want to know you, Y/n,” he suddenly blurts out. You almost get whip-lash from how quickly you turn your head to face him once again. “You’re seriously such a talent to me. I want to know you and all your muses. What got you into art and art history and working here. All of it — I want to know it all.”

Now you’re seriously confused.

Maybe it was the way Taehyung told you that it was a likely possibility that Namjoon did like you despite your previous observations that he didn’t. Or maybe it's that glint in his eye that suggests that he truly wants to know more about you other than the fact that you work and present your art in the museum he frequently goes to. You don’t know. But you’ve always been opportunistic, so you take his mysterious sentiment into question.

“Namjoon, have you been talking about me with my co-worker?” you ask, that speed in your heartbeat making its way up your chest.

Namjoon blushes, smiling down at his notepad. “I knew that loser couldn’t keep his mouth shut,” he laughs to himself. “I have. But I promise, all good things.”

“Namjoon, I have to be honest. Taehyung did say some thi—”

“It’s all true,” he nods his head while looking back up at you. “Listen Y/n, as much as I love your tours, this was the one I wanted to go on the most. Your art, your voice, your presence —this is what I was the most curious about. All those questions about the artists I asked you about after those tours — I genuinely just loved listening to your passion. Hearing you talk about what you love and looking at you show off the work you put your soul into. I dunno, maybe I’ve developed a crush.”

Your heart beats out of your chest. Are you really that oblivious? You’re 6 1/2 years older than this man — you should know when a person has been crushing on you by now!

“Namjoon, I’m old,” you blurt, laughing at yourself. A part of you can't help but feel a little insecure about your age. One to two years and you're usually in the 'go' for a lot of romantic things and partnerships with others. But 6 1/2? That's more so unheard of nowadays.

“I could call you ajumma if you wanted,” he smiles teasingly.

“I’ll kill you,” you playfully threaten him. The flutter in your tummy is a little too overwhelming as he flashes his teeth at you, that look telling you that he’s really serious about this crush he’s developed.

“Seriously, Y/n, I couldn’t give a fuck about age,” he says. “I stand by the fact that I’d become gay and date a 570-year-old da Vinci if he were still alive today.”

“Art whore,” you laugh.

“So let me take you out,” he continues, simmering his laughter. “Coffee tomorrow at 10?”

You feel a strange weight lifted off your shoulders. Nodding your head at his question, you feel like you’ve maybe developed a new muse.

[End]

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[A/N]: Ajumma (아줌마) - [N], a Korean term referring to a married or middle-aged woman; typically a woman of one's parents' age or older.

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[End. Do not copy. Original work of @jungkookstatts , 2023]

77 notes · View notes

icedmatchatae · 2 years

Text

Cien Años | KNJ

Pairing: Best Friend Namjoon x Best Friend Reader

Genre: Hanahaki AU, Angst, Fluff (barely)

Summary: A sad story of two best friends who loved each other for different reasons.

Warning: UR GONNA BE SAD, namjoon being in denial, oc being out of the loop, flashbacks :(, a lot of crying from everyone, mentions of death (nobody dies tho!), mentions of surgery, illness, unrequited love, there's somewhat of a happy ending!

Word count: 15.1k because I'm a menace

Note: Italics are flashbacks.

A/N: Inspired by the song "Cien Años" by Natalia Lafourcade & Pepe Aguilar. My friends told me to write a story about it...so I did.

I've also cross-posted this originally on AO3 as well! Enjoy~~~

You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply.

Trembling fingers gripping onto your daisy bouquet as you controlled your shaky breathing. You faced the closed doors, waiting for the queue. One by one, you saw your bridesmaids leave you until you were alone. A light sheen of sweat expanded on your back; luckily, the laced fabric hid your nervousness of today.

What awaited inside would be your most anticipated life-changing event yet. Once you leave there, two souls become one, purposeful promises are committed with expected hardship to overcome. The day you are officially united with the love of your life.

You’ve been waiting for this day, and you couldn’t wait any longer. At the other side of the doors, there stood your soon-to-be husband smiling like a maniac. You wanted this so badly, nervous because the ceremony separated you from your soulmate. But it’ll be okay.

Because he was worth it.

He was dressed in a suit with his hands intertwined behind his back.

His mouth opened in awe at the sight of you. You slowly walked down the aisle with your father at your left side. His arm linked firmly around yours. With bittersweet eyes, he looked like he didn’t want to let you go but knew he had to for the best.

Your dress flowed down with grace, the train behind dragging along the carpeted floor. Your effortless beauty that it shined through your sheer veil. You held onto your favorite flowers, handpicked by him, and will forever keep them in your memories.

Your smile beamed through your family, friends, and esteemed guests, but he could tell how anxious you were deep inside. He knew how much love you had in you, how much soul and care you had to offer. He knew everything about you. After all—

Namjoon has loved you ever since you were younger.

When you first met Namjoon, you were about 11. The smartest nerd in school was your partner for a science project. Between the introduction and the first place win, you’ve gotten to know him much better and enjoyed his presence.

It baffled you to discover the lanky boy with thick-rimmed rectangular glasses and who wore velcro shoes listened to Nas and Eminem. Did you mention that he had a bowl cut? Because he did.

He only fascinated you, even more, wanting to befriend you, not realizing he would be one of the most influential people in your life. He quickly became your best friend, and you were inseparable. You graduated high school and college together and even were roommates for many years.

You never saw life without him, your best friend.

Being together more than half of your life, Namjoon didn’t realize the day he met you was the first sign of him falling in love with you.

“Why do you have so much sugar?” Namjoon questioned, observing you next to him when you pulled out a ziplock bag of sugar packets. You pulled one out and ripped it open. You shook the pouch over your mouth, collecting the sweetener on your taste buds. He unapologetically grimaced at you.

“It’s a snack; also, since my mom said I’m too young to drink coffee, I took all of the sugar in our house since I get so much energy.” You simply explained, offering him a packet.

He paused and sighed, joining you in eating packets and packets until you both were a giggling mess.

You were pretty odd, almost lacking social cues, but he couldn’t be one to talk since he was awkward himself. Your aura was not something he was used to, but he never regretted it and grew to love your unusualness. It was one of the characteristics of why he loved you dearly.

Your bright smile, aggravating yet endearing personality, and how much you gave yourself to others wholeheartedly created a rippling effect on his heart. But almost too much as it lets you get hurt by others.

He remembered the day you came home with shedding tears falling on your face. He was working on a group essay in your shared living room with Jimin, a friend and peer from his classes, when a loud bang disrupted their concentration.

“He cheated on me!” You sobbed as you dropped your things to the wooden floor. You quickly spotted your best friend and tackled him. You clutched onto his shirt, pushing your head into his chest with your cries staining the fabric.

Without second-guessing, Namjoon wrapped his arms around your fragile form, kissing your hair. He rubbed your back as you continued to sob at your broken heart. He eyed Jimin, apologizing for the interruption, but he understood. The shorter man gestured for him to text him later before departing your home.

After your weeping died down, you explained how you saw your boyfriend of seven months cuddling and making out with another girl at a coffee shop on the other side of the city from where you lived. With the bit of courage you had, you confronted Seokjin and threw your boiling hot tea at him before running away.

Namjoon was angry for you and wanted to beat Seokjin up for doing this to you. But what’s worse, this wasn’t the first time something had happened. You were hurt by many others before because you gave too quickly; you gave the benefit of the doubt to those undeserving of it.

You tried your best to learn from your mistake and took extra precautions, but somehow the next man in your life gets trickier and more conniving than the last.

“Why does this happen to me?”

You sat on your apartment complex’s rooftop, looking at the bright glowing city. It was past midnight; Namjoon thought it was a great idea to get some convenience store snacks and ramen while you get some fresh air.

“Like was I a descendent of Judas?” You rhetorically asked.

“I’m not a theology major, but I don’t think Judas had any children.” He pointed out as he slurped his noodles.

You glared at him and his intelligence, “Don’t correct me now.” You slammed your ramen bowl on the makeshift table made from a stack of wooden pallets. “I thought he was the one.”

“I know you’re hurt, flower. Hurt is only temporary. You’ll heal; it’ll take time, though. It’s really shitty that it happened to you.” His comforting words eased your emotional state, using his nickname for you.

It wasn’t anything cute. He only does it because you told him you used to eat flowers when you were younger. Your parents were scared and brought you to the hospital, it was a whole thing, but he liked to pick on you and made sure you wouldn’t forget your stupidity.

“Is there something wrong with me? Be honest.” You genuinely asked. Your puffy eyes met his, waiting for his response.

He stared at you. Underneath the full moon and the illumination from the cityscape, faint shadows fell onto your features. Your irises sparkled with the dimming sense of hope in you. He hated seeing you like this, seeing the light in you slowly giving up.

He placed down his bowl before reaching for your hands. He intertwined your fingers together, comparing the size difference between you two. He grinned lightly, but enough to display the dimples on his cheeks.

“Seokjin was stupid and never realized what was before him.” He answered, licking his lips and tasting the spice of the meal. Your mouth curled at his words, holding his fingers tightly around yours. “Nothing is wrong with you, just your taste in men.”

“Hey!” You let go of him and slapped his shoulder, pouting your lips. “Stop it!”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” He chuckled, putting his hands in surrender.

“I’m questioning why you’re my best friend.” You seethed through your teeth.

“Flower, you’re one of the most special people.”

You snorted at his comment, “Nice try.”

“It’s true.” He countered. His smile faded a little, noticing your lack of confidence. “Special people like you will get infinite wishes that your little heart desires. Everything you hope for will come true. You’ll get what you truly deserve, flower. It’ll just take time.”

You gazed back at him. The twinkling lights in your pupils appeared at his reassurance. “Thank you, Joon. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

It was a common exchange between you two, but little did Namjoon know, it held a deeper meaning.

Though Seokjin never saw what was in front of him, Namjoon never noticed what he had until it was too late.

Years passed, and you eventually moved on from your heartbreak, having Namjoon by your side. You seemed happier and cheerful while he watched you. But you never were with anyone ever since.

You went on to bigger and better things, like landing a high-paying corporate job after college. Namjoon also was doing well, from being an intern climbed his way to the top in being the art curator at the national museum. You were both proud of each other and your accomplishment, always cheered one another on when times got tough.

However, despite your successes, you agreed it was time to move out of your janky apartment and part ways. It was a harsh transition since you’ve seen each other every day for over ten years, but you made it work. You promised to text and call every day and update anything that happened.

Namjoon could never leave you and you the same back. Again, you and he were inseparable.

You two scheduled dinner at the end of the week. Ever since you got promoted, your schedule restricted you from spending time with him, but you kept your promise to call and text. Namjoon was currently working on his first major project for the museum and was excited to tell you all about it. You couldn’t wait either.

But for now, he had lunch with Jimin at a café since the shorter finally had time in his hectic residency life.

“It was so wild. I saw anything like it before.” Jimin talked about a patient he had and their diagnosis, Hanahaki Disease.

Jimin explained how Hanahaki Disease was this exponentially progressing illness that stemmed from unrequited love. Flowers–the popular indication of the disease–bloom in the person’s lungs and heart and can only be intensified. His patient had stage four of this Hanahaki Disease.

“I’ve read about it in the books, and cases were rare. Seeing it first hand was very tragic.” Jimin sighed, recalling his experience.

“What does stage four mean?” Though Namjoon was skeptical, he was interested in this so-called disease.

“It means the roots from the flowers have grown into his respiratory system. He came in choking on his blood and coughing up sunflowers.”

“Why sunflower?”

“It was his wife’s favorite flowers.” Jimin’s face gloomed lower. “Poor guy caught her cheating, and the painful love was too strong.”

Namjoon hissed at the thought, “I feel for him.”

“Yeah, so at that point, he either dies or gets surgery to remove the roots.” The shorter concluded. “Sorry for the depressing story, but I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“You’re good, man,” Namjoon reassured. “Though you saw it, it’s quite an unusual diagnosis, don’t you think? I mean, doesn’t it sound far-fetched? Like love really made that happen?”

“It does, but you won’t think that way if you saw it in front of you. Love can do a lot to someone.” Jimin reasoned back. “There’s little evidence on it, but it does happen.”

The pairing sat in silence, processing the tragic story. Namjoon wondered how severe love has to be for you to end up like that. He had never really experienced that kind of love before; it wasn’t hard to love, in his opinion, but loving someone had to be chosen wisely and thoughtfully. Love shouldn’t hurt.

“Anyways, besides me and flower vomiting patients, how are you and the art life?” Jimin changed the subject to a lighter feel. He knew about Namjoon’s project and was impatient to see the final product. “How’s the project? What was it about again?”

“It’s going great. Stressful, but I’m enjoying every bit of it.” He smiled, thinking about his passion. “I guess your story was a great transition to my project. It’s about love. Various meanings and interpretations of love worldwide, so I’ve been obtaining many pieces overseas to display them.”

“Ahh, so you’re gonna get typical ones like The Kiss by Gustav Klimt or that one by Picasso?” Jimin semi-mocked, incorporating very little knowledge about art.

“No, if that’s what you’re thinking.” Namjoon rolled his eyes, munching on his salad. “The museum wanted me to go through a different approach and find more modern and recent artists.”

“So, like up and coming artists?” The shorter asked, and he hummed in response. “I guess, what type of approach are you having with love?”

“Well, love is more than a feeling. It’s hard to put into words. It’s an essence that can be explained through various points of view.”

“Yeah, Mr. Smartass. Stop being so technical!”

“I’m just saying! Love causes emotions. It’s a concept to profess desires and connectedness to someone within an individual, so that’s why that Hanahaki Disease seems exaggerated.” Namjoon argued his thoughts. “I’m not saying love doesn’t exist or anything. It’s here somewhere.”

“This is why you don’t have a girlfriend.” Jimin scoffed, leaning back into his chair. Namjoon ignored his comment like usual before his phone pinged a message.

It was you, and he was delighted to open it. A picture of your lunch, or rather lunches. He saw another plate from the opposite end of the table. It was probably Ryujin, your coworker buddy you spent your time with.

“Is that ___?” Jimin had a devilish smile on him.

“Yeah?? What about it?” Namjoon replied to you with, “Bruh, that looks bomb. Enjoy!” And locked his screen before paying attention to his friend before him. “You know we communicate a lot.”

“Yes, I know the many instances.” Jimin agreed. “But seeing you smile just by a text says more than you say. Actions speak louder than words!”

“Jimin, we’re not going through with this again.” The taller shook his head at his friend’s persistence. “I told you I don’t love her like that. She’s been my best friend for years!”

“Yeah, but I don’t see you giggling, kicking your feet, and twirling your hair thinking about me.” Jimin retorted, folding his arms over his chest. “You probably don’t notice it since you’ve been with her all this time, but you give one another so much, more than friends usually do.”

“Maybe, it’s just you because you end up sleeping with your opposite gendered friends.”

“Hey, that was three times! And I was drunk for two.”

“Point is that ___ and I have been best friends for years . Neither of us did anything like that in the time being and never will.”

“Because you never made a move and acknowledged yo—”

“Jimin.” Namjoon interrupted sternly, wanting to end this conversation. Jimin never understood your friendship with him and constantly suspected that there was something more than what met the eyes. He could sense it, but Namjoon refused to listen.

“Fine, I’ll stop.” Jimin sighed. “At least acknowledge my words.”

Namjoon gulped his iced coffee and thinned his lips, “Maybe.”

He should have listened.

After dinner, he took you to the museum. Due to his respected status, he had the privilege of possessing the keys to artistic treasures. It was a way for him to move back and forth with any work beyond the public hours. And because you had the privilege of being his best friend, you could see the Love exhibition he finalized that morning and now waiting for the official opening in two weeks.

The stepping of your heels echoed within the empty museum. Your eyes scanned through the beautiful artwork before you, enchanted by the different styles and meanings, yet they all revolved around one concept: love.

You stole little glances of Namjoon, his attention invested in the paintings as he passed by you. You appreciated his passion for his job, bringing purpose to his life and those around him. He gave you comfort and solace in your chaotic life, and no amount of gratitude can equate to his actions and words.

However, you were nervous around him this time, playing out what to say and do. Sure, he never cared before, but you were a bit self-conscious with this one. You wanted to approach it right. After all, what he said and did matters to you. He was important.

Your eyes landed on a particular piece, never seeing anything like it. The painting contained four bodies. Two of which embraced one another on top of a hill as birds and flowers bloomed around them. Hues resembled joy and, of course, love. As you shifted down the mountain, the third subject laid down, surrounded by colors of gloom and sorrow. Wilting flora consumed the body. The complete opposite of the couple on top. However, the final form was rather strange because you barely saw it. You could see the background behind it, almost like a ghost.

“I see you found my favorite piece in the exhibit.” Your best friend announced with a grin. You were too into the painting to realize he stood by you. He carefully inspected the artwork, absorbing the emotions it gave and the purpose of the artist’s creation.

“Why is your favorite?” You wondered, your eyes still attentive to the piece.

“To be honest, I’ve met with the artist before during my work trip in Mexico. Great guy, his interpretations were so philosophical that it expanded my knowledge that it only left me wanting more from him.” Namjoon expressed. “This is my favorite piece because, for once, he had something that portrayed a specific visual he wanted to convey, and I’m also sure that many people can relate.”

“And that is?”

“It’s a story.” He began. “A depressing one. Once upon a time, a man and woman fell in love, and they lived happily ever.”

“That doesn’t sound too sad.” You chuckled.

“You didn’t let me finish.” He mentioned, making you shut your mouth. “As the couple danced to their love, they never realized that someone from afar also fell in love with her. That’s him.” He pointed to the covered body. “All the flowers he sent her returned to him, and he slowly died from it. The last body is him, but he’ll forever roam the world with this emptiness inside. But at the very least, he can stay afar, looking at her and seeing her happy.”

“Ouch, that fucking hurts.” You pouted at his description. No one should ever go through that.

“The painting is called Cien Años by Pepe Lafourcade.” He informed. “Pepe said if he lived 100 years, he’d think of her for 100 years.”

“Tragically captivating.” You nodded before shifting your eyes onto your best friend, who was already gazing at you.

Namjoon swore his world stopped by witnessing you and your very radiant form. You looked much healthier now, caring for yourself and enhancing your beauty more than yesterday but less than tomorrow. He observed a new necklace on you, perhaps a treat for your hard work, he assumed. You deserved it. You always did. He saw you like you were the only one in the world, his world.

And no one could compare to you.

He wished to be with you as long as he could.

His stare flustered you a bit; you’ve never seen anything like it. You thought you were seeing things and had some assumptions in your mind. But you merely pushed them because they weren’t necessary anymore.

You broke the eye contact as you focused on your feet. You had to speak to him. “Joon?”

“Yes, flower?” He crouched down, trying to find your eyes, laughing at how timid you were. It was peculiar to act like this with him. He didn’t want to say anything when you first met up. He wanted you to tell him naturally.

You gave up and finally faced him again. Your large doe eyes were his favorite; he never told you but enjoyed seeing them. “I have to tell you something. Something important.”

“Oh, how important?”

“Kinda big? Uh, serious, actually.”

“How so,” He was being playful, but that’s only because he was unaware of how much the words that came out of you will affect him in the long run.

“I’ve been dating this guy for the past six months…uhhh, Jungkook is his name, and I’m falling in love with him.”

Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook.

Namjoon’s attention focused on you as you reached the end of the aisle. Your father gave you a goodbye kiss before he lets go of you. You turned away from him and smiled gently, with giggles in between biting your lips. The unconditional true love flashed in your eyes.

But it wasn’t directed towards him.

Instead, it was for the man in front of him. The groom.

Jeon Jungkook.

The love of your life.

“I’m sorry, who?”

Namjoon was utterly stunned at what you just said. You were dating someone for a while, and you didn’t tell him? Your best friend? Now you’re in love with that guy?

“His name is Jungkook, and we—”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He felt offended and angry by your decision. It wasn’t like you. You told him everything. You told him about Seokjin the second you talked to him. The name was vaguely familiar. He had heard it before. Wait—

“Isn’t he your boss?” Namjoon asked incredulously.

“Well, not anymore. I got promoted and transferred to another department, remember?” You tried your best to explain yourself. “I mean, he technically is. He runs part of the corporation.”

“W-why? H-how?”

“We had to keep it a secret. I couldn’t tell you….”

“Couldn’t tell me? Me, your best friend?” He forced a laugh, but there was nothing funny in his tone.

“I’m sorry, I—”

“Flower, how could you be so fucking stupid like that? Don’t you know how dangerous that is?”

Namjoon regretted those words the second they came out of his mouth. Your facial expression said it all, insulted and hurt by your best friend. Your face became sour with your lips trembling. God, you hated how sensitive you were being. But like you said, what he said or did mean so much to you.

So it hurt when he didn’t support you.

He took a step towards you, but you stepped back. “___, I—”

“I thought you’d understand.” Your eyes were glossy, blinking away to fight the hurt from being released. You shook your head, “Like how my best friend usually is. I thought you would be supportive.”

Silence drowned you two. Namjoon had no words, all he could think about was how much he disappointed you. You said nothing and couldn’t bother dealing with him. Like what he told you if you didn’t want to deal with the situation right now, just walk away.

So you did, leaving him alone in the museum as you called Jungkook to pick you up.

Namjoon couldn’t comprehend what he was feeling right now. His breath shivered at this indescribable tension in his stomach and chest. His fingers were finicky, needing to do something to keep the thoughts at bay. But all through his mind was you. He remained unfocused, especially since you didn’t reply to his texts or answer his calls. The unknown of what you were doing and how you felt bothered him, distracting his brain away from everything around him.

You were in love with your boss, and he had no idea. He couldn’t recollect any hints or say about you dating someone. Sure, you’ve gotten happier, but he thought it was because of him…that you were spending your time with him…

If he was honest with himself, he wasn’t mad that you didn’t tell him. It was probably the rational thing to do since Jungkook was well-known in the business—Namjoon had to search him up. It was most likely to keep word from spreading, and no one knew.

In fact, he was more uncomfortable than you were with someone. He has seen what happened to you in the past and didn’t want you to get hurt. He knew nothing about this Jungkook guy and feared the worst from him yet.

It was the night of the official opening of his exhibition, and you still weren’t talking. This was the longest you haven’t spoken to each other. It made Namjoon stay up at night running a busy mind. He started getting worried, thinking he fucked up your whole friendship and his shitty remarks. He was so upset with himself that he wasn’t feeling well.

Namjoon was weary for a couple of weeks, with a scratchy throat and a loss of appetite. It was probably stress from everything that was going on with planning and, of course, his dilemma with you. Hopefully, after tonight, he’ll be a little bit better. Though he begged to differ when he developed slight coughing in the morning.

The murmur of guests crowded the museum’s main lobby, some of the artists that he collected for the exhibit also attended. Unfortunately, Pepe wasn’t here due to conflicting schedules, but he gave his wishes to Namjoon.

People went up to him, admiring and congratulating him and his work. Namjoon could only smile politely and share his thanks. It was a big day for him, and if it was a success, it’d open him to a new world of the arts. Famous artists and museums would know him, and his approach to his work would get recognized by many.

Yet, his mood was down, hoping that a certain someone would see him on a day like this.

“Sup, bro!!” A few invitees glowered at the person for the loud disruption, but he did not care. “Calm down, don’t give me dirty eyes. I’m probably more educated than all of you combined.”

One of the security guards came toward his friend, “Excuse me, si—”

“It’s Dr. Park,” Jimin corrected before grabbing a flute of champagne from the waiter. The guard was about to protest, but Namjoon raised his hand, reassuring them that he was, unfortunately, an important guest. He winked cheekily at him through his slit-like eyes with his pride held high. Security glared at the doctor once more before leaving the premises.

“Jimin, don’t make a scene. It’s bad enough they see us together.” Namjoon exhaled, swirling his drink with a straw.

“How is it bad? We’re besties! I’m so proud of you.” Jimin shrugged but slowly changed his tone to a more serious one as he looked at his friend’s expression. “What’s wrong? You don’t look too good.”

“I’m fine, just been coughing since this morning.” Namjoon cleared his throat, but the shorter knew there was much more.

“Haven’t talked to her since?”

Namjoon sighed and nodded, “I’m worried I fucked our friendship.”

The doctor bit back his tongue. He needed to comfort his friend now, then tell him off later. “She’s upset, but it won’t be enough to stop your friendship. She’ll come around; she just needs time.”

“I know, but—” Namjoon swore he stopped breathing. From across the room, he spotted you. He didn’t think you’d come. His pupils dilated at your appearance. You were absolutely breathtaking like you were prized artwork in the museum, capturing the hearts of anyone who came by.

His heart weirdly skipped a beat.

Your eyes met his, then smiled at his success and waved. You headed in his direction. However, the closer you came, the more he realized you weren’t alone.

Hand in hand, a tall, strong-built man followed by you. His round eyes observed the area while his mouth was agape at the ambiance. His features were strong yet soft, and he looked approachable. He was around your age, reasonably young for someone running part of a whole corporation.

“Joon,” You greeted before letting go of the man to hug your best friend. You shocked him, his body stiffening up, then relaxing at your familiar warmth and comfort. He wrapped his arms around you, firming his grip. “Congratulations!”

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” His eyes watered up, not realizing that he had held back tears since that night. You were finally here with him, and the emotions let loose.

“It’s okay. I’m not mad anymore.” You promised as you pulled away to look at his face. Some tears fell down to which you wiped them off with your gentle thumbs. “I’m sorry I didn’t reply; that was a bitch move.”

“No, you had every reason.” He begged to differ. “I didn’t even give you a chance to speak.”

“Next time, we’ll communicate better.” You proposed, and he nodded quickly, knowing that your friendship remained strong as ever.

“Yay, you made up. What about me?” Jimin pushed his way into you. You giggled and hugged him too.

“Hello, Dr. Park. Long time no see, looking dangerous as ever.” You said.

“Hello, ____. Long time no see, Looking ravishing as ever. And yes, always dangerous, but no one needs to know.” He smiled boldly, then shifted his attention to the man biting his lips, holding a bouquet. “Who might this be?”

All your attention goes towards the newcomer, bulging his eyes but letting out a bunny-like smile. Carrying some flowers with one hand, he used the other to wave and bow.

“This is Jungkook…my boyfriend.” You revealed to the two men.

Right on cue, Namjoon coughed harshly. He gulped some water and tried clearing his throat again. You raised an eyebrow at him, but he gave you an okay signal.

“Jungkook, this is Namjoon.”

Jungkook handed you the bouquet, then he went up to the taller man and shook his hand with both of his, “Hello, Namjoon. It’s so nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard nothing but great things from this one.” He gestured to you. Namjoon accepted the greeting and nodded silently. He needed to be civil, at least for now.

“And this one is Dr. Park Jimin.” You presented. “Remember, he’s a doctor.”

“And don’t you forget about it,” Jimin added on. Jungkook shook his hand as well. “I heard of your corporation. I saw on the news that you opened two new shelters for mothers and children. You do great work.”

Jungkook blushed and smiled, “Oh, yes. Thank you. It was a hard process, but I hope to do more of them in the future.”

“Oh, these are for you.” You said, passing the bouquet to your best friend.

Namjoon inspected the flowers—daisies, his favorite flowers because they were your favorite.

“This is a celebratory gift for your first solo exhibit and an apology.” You continued gazing at your best friend, trying to communicate telepathically, which Namjoon was fully aware of.

Somehow that hinted Jungkook into saying, “Dr. Park, do you think you can accompany me to the hors d’oeuvres? Let’s leave these two to talk.”

Impressed at his request, Jimin nodded, enjoying the man so far. The shorter glanced at Namjoon to give him some good luck before joining Jungkook’s food adventure.

There, you both were alone but not really knowing how to start this. This was the longest you’ve been apart, let alone fight like that. In fact, you rarely fought. There was nothing that came in between you two until now.

“He seems nice,” Namjoon commented about your new…boyfriend. “His mannerisms are a bit mechanical, though.”

You let out a chuckle, “He’s nervous. He wants to impress you.”

“Big CEO wanting to impress a small-time art curator? That’s new.”

“Well, big CEO knows that the art curator means a lot to me.” You went along with his saying. “He wants you to like him.”

“Why would he care about what I think?” Namjoon muttered, feeling a bit jittery. He held the bouquet tightly to keep his movements in control.

“Because he knows that I care about what you think.” You replied. “He was sad when I told him how you reacted because he was afraid. He doesn’t want you to think badly of him.”

“Not wanting to compare, but it’s hard not to after how many before he treated you.” He frowned as he said his thought out loud. “I don’t want you to get hurt, flower.”

You smiled softly at his care towards you. That’s what you loved about him. “Joon, he’s not going to hurt me. I can tell you that.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“I made the first move.” You revealed. “And though he’s stern and serious about his work—bless his soul—he is so shy, Joon. He was a nervous wreck, confessing his crush on me. It felt like I was in high school.”

Namjoon couldn’t imagine it. At first, he didn’t think that shyness would be a characteristic of Jungkook. Then again, he doesn’t know anything about him. He didn’t accept him at all, probably not anytime soon for safety precautions.

“He’s the first man in a long time for me, and I’ve been careful. He’s been careful. I actually asked him to keep it between just us two because I didn’t want my coworkers knowing about our relationship.” You elaborated. “But he suggested to at least tell our loved ones if we wanted to be serious with each other.”

“You’re serious with him?” Namjoon spoke softly. A sharp, quick pain pushed through his stomach, leaving an unpleasant feeling. Yet he didn’t try showing it; he didn’t want you to worry about him.

You nodded at the thought of Jungkook being steady with you. “Yes, that’s why I was afraid of telling you about him. I wanted you to accept him too.”

He coughed again, shaking his head. “I’m accepting of him, yet if I’m being honest. But I’ll try to.”

“He knows about my past too, and he swore he’s not like that.” He coughed harshly this time. You handed him some water that he accepted. “Joon, are you okay?”

Namjoon chugged the cup down and exhaled slowly. “Yeah, I think I have an upset stomach. I got a bad cough from this morning.”

“Make sure you take care of yourself, okay? I don’t wanna beat you up if you’re not being healthy.” You scolded, and it only made him laugh.

“I’ll be fine, flower. It’s just been stressful, from the event and our time apart.”

Your mood died a little, being guilty about what you did. “I’m sorry again. I promise to never do that again.” You grabbed his hand to squeeze some comfort in him.

His body got hit with another blow, but he bit his lips to dull the pain. “You worry too much, flower. It wasn’t your fault. You were also worried about me, too, no?”

You nodded, “I was. I care for you too much not to.”

“The feeling is mutual.” He reassured. “Then we should just enjoy the night and days to come.”

You couldn’t help but hug him. You missed him so much, crying to Jungkook about him. He knew you cared for your best friend and hoped that you two would reconcile.

“I love you, Joon.”

“I love you too, flower.”

Again, a standard practice, but Namjoon didn’t realize his love changed from yours.

Namjoon couldn’t hate Jungkook.

The more he was around the guy, the more he realized how chaotically sweet Jungkook was. He was just like you, an odd presence but very lovable. The only thing he hated about him was that he kept winning at everything, yet he was still humble about it.

Jungkook made initiatives to hang out with you and your friends from time to time just so he could understand your life and engage with those you loved. He hung out with him and Jimin, too, without you, and it was a fun guy’s night. He put so much effort into what he wanted, and he did it with ease. It was easier to like him.

Your relationship was growing healthy, and Namjoon was happy for you. You needed something like this, and he could only hope that Jungkook would continue that with you.

On the other hand, Namjoon has been on a stump. First of all, his event was a huge success. His networking multiplied, getting busy with upcoming projects. He’s been traveling internationally, attending conferences and parties, meeting other curators like him, and even making new friends like Jung Hoseok, who was overseas as a curator in Madrid.

So what was his stump?

Well, for a few months now, Namjoon has had this stomach flu. He’s been getting random fevers, uncontrollable shaking, sharp pains in his chest or abdomen, and not eating regularly.

The worst part of it all was his cough. It didn’t improve since that night, it seemed to have gotten worse. He felt the need to scratch his throat, even having the urge put his fingers down his mouth and take care of the itch himself.

He went to the doctors, and they assumed the same. They provided him more potent medication every visit, but it didn’t feel like it was working. Was it because he was growing older? Did he need to start working out and caring for his body like that? It was bothering him, distracting him from his work, and he couldn’t do anything about it.

If only he knew, his condition worsened with time.

“And now for the bride and groom to say their vows.” The ordained minister proceeded.

Before you proclaimed your love, you held your hands with Jungkook’s, focusing on him. You took deep breaths, collecting your memorized speech that you suddenly forgot. Your eyes told that you were stuck, but Jungkook helped you.

“Anything you say, I will love for. Hell, you can call me irritating and I’d say thank you.” Little giggles responded to the groom’s joke. You rolled your eyes, then remembered why you loved him in the first place.

“When I first met you, I was afraid of loving again. I was hurt and disappointed so many times. I don’t even know how many tears I shed throughout that journey. I felt like giving up and never loving again.” You started your vows. “But then you changed that for me. Though I was scared, you helped me back up and had so much patience with me. I don’t know how you do it. Jimin even questioned it.”

Namjoon looked back and saw his shorter friend nod to your speech before putting his eyes back on you.

“You brought nothing but joy in my life. Yes, we went through difficult times, but we made it out, and I know we’ll do that again in our marriage. You’ve accepted not only me into your life but also my family and friends you’ve grown to love.” You sniffled, not wanting to cry, but you just had to. “Thank you for loving me at my best and even my worst. Thank you for not giving up on us. You are the love of my life, and you make me happier than I could ever imagine and more loved than I ever thought was possible.”

Namjoon heard sniffing from Jungkook, who let out tears faster than you. Upholding the role as best man, he kept tissues in his back pocket just in case. He pulled them out and tapped on Jungkook’s shoulder. The groom accepted the gesture and handed one to you and then to him.

“I vow to honor you, listen, laugh with you, and cry with you. I just hope you do the same back. You make me so proud, proud to be called your wife. I love you, Jeon Jungkook. I can’t wait to spend my life with you.”

Namjoon didn’t know when it started in terms of the other symptoms, but he remembered the first time he specifically saw it.

Jimin threw a Christmas party at his house and invited people you didn’t really know besides him, Jungkook, and Namjoon. Everyone else was people from the hospital he trained at, his party friends, the list went on. Nevertheless, it was a casual party with cute little games he had prepared.

You, Jungkook, and Namjoon talked amongst yourself in the corner. You and Jungkook had matching grinch Christmas sweaters. After a year of being together, you and Jungkook were more comfortable in front of people with your relationship. A few kisses and hugs here and there, but you liked to keep your relationship with him private.

Still, the public display of affection was prominent, and it disgusted Namjoon. It may seem like a joke to others, but it really did gross him out. Whenever you cuddled up onto one another or just plain out kissed, Namjoon’s upset stomach or chest murmurs intensified.

Like now, he kissed your cheek, and Namjoon felt a dig in his torso. His face turned sour, exhaled slowly as he palmed the ache.

“Namjoon, are you okay?” Jungkook looked at him with concern. “Are you having chest pains again?”

“Yeah, but it’s gonna go away again.” Namjoon brushed it off. “It comes and goes from time to time.”

“Did you go to the doctor again?” You asked.

“Yes, flower. I went the other day. Since I told him about my chest, they had me do an x-ray. They said they’ll call me, but I don’t think it’ll be any time soon ‘cause of the holidays.”

“The holidays shouldn’t be an excuse to keep my best friend from being healthy.” You pouted, earning laughs from your boyfriend and best friend.

“Honey, don’t worry too much.” Jungkook patted your head. “Namjoon is grown to make his own decisions and choose what to worry about.”

“I’m gonna have to agree with, JK, flower.” Namjoon agreed. “Plus, we’re still young. I’m sure whatever they find, it’ll be easy to fix. There are also not many health issues on both sides of my family, so I’m chilling.”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes, “Your ease is so annoying sometimes.”

After that conversation, Jimin chimed in and pulled all three of you to a game of “Nogpong.” The four were split into pairs: You and Namjoon and Jimin and Jungkook. Losers had to do what the winners said.

Jungkook and Jimin had experience playing these games, but you and Namjoon’s teamwork was unmatched. The teams went back and forth, missing cups, shooting them while making the opposing chug the eggnog down.

Your team had two cups left while they had five. It was your turn to throw a ball. Jimin threw insults at you to distract your concentration, but you tried to ignore that little man. You threw the ball, earning another point.

“You suck.” Jimin spat back before downing the drink.

It was now Namjoon’s turn. He focused on the final cup, being so close to winning. But his coughing grew harshly at that moment, sounding like it hurt. There was so much phlegm that he grabbed a napkin from a tissue box to cough up. He expectorated all he could into the tissue, ultimately feeling better. But when he saw the content in the cloth, his pupils dilated in shock.

What he thought was mucus was actually blood. He noticed that he could taste the unpleasant taste of iron in his mouth. He gulped down the remnants and stuffed the trash in his pocket without thinking.

“Some cough, Joon. Are you sure you’re okay?” You furrowed your brows at him.

“Flower, I’m okay.” He said again. “Let’s just finish the game.”

You weren’t as convinced, but you had to let it slide for his sake.

Namjoon nodded towards the guys about how he felt before going back to the game. He shot it into the cup with ease, cheering at the close win. All you had to do was score in the same cup.

It was all on you now. If you make this, victory was yours and Namjoon's. Sure, there was nothing to lose, but bragging rights were substantial to you. You held your breath and threw the ball.

You won!

You and Namjoon yelled like deranged individuals, celebrating your alcoholic game victory. Jungkook and Jimin took their loss like champs as they shook hands.

Namjoon held you by the waist and jumped in joy as you threw meaningless insults at your boyfriend and friend. In this position, something in Namjoon sparked. He watched you bad-mouthed them, but you looked so elegant, so beautiful doing it. He saw the fluttering of your lashes, the curve of your nose, and the soft plush that was your lips.

You being in his arms was so soothing. The warmth you produced heated his larger frame. It felt so right. He wished to stay like this forever with you.

But those thoughts caused a downward spiral in his stomach. His head was light. He immediately turned green, his chest feeling like it had been shot multiple times. His throat was open as everything he consumed started moving up. He pushed away aggressively as he covered his mouth, running to the nearest bathroom.

He disregarded the calls at him as he slammed the door open. He rushed to the toilet and pulled up the lid before vomiting everything in him. He purged so explosively that he thought his eyeballs would pop out of his head, and snot ran down from his nose and onto the top of his lip. He felt the sweat dripping down his face. Damn, this was the worst complication yet.

The three of you followed behind him while you took the lead. You bent towards your friend and rubbed his back as he threw up. You both stayed like that for a few minutes. Jimin had to go back to calm his guests down while Jungkook went to get water for Namjoon.

“Namjoon, do you want us to take you home?” Jungkook asked. “We can bring your car back too?”

Namjoon couldn’t say no. He knew he didn’t feel good, so he nodded.

“Let me grab your things, Joon.” You stood up and lightly patted his back. “I’ll come back quick.” You said before leaving with Jungkook.

He retched up once more, releasing all he had left closed eyes. When he opened the inside, his heart dropped. He thought his vision deceived him. No way could this happen. It was impossible. There was no reason to have it.

What he assumed he puked was the pasta and wine from the party was actually more blood. But that wasn’t the most alarming.

He always thought of them as simple and beautiful to look at, appealing to the eye, but it was hard to think of daisies in that way when his blood coated the fresh petals, and they came out of his body.

Namjoon was now lying in bed, wide awake and petrified. He was dubious, couldn’t find common ground in what he experienced. Maybe he was hallucinating; the very reason was that he wasn’t feeling so well. Maybe the blood-covered daisies were seen to cover up the horrible sight of regurgitated Alfredo pasta. But the sickly fragrant scent of the flowers begged to differ.

Okay, if he were to have it, how did he get it? He needed answers. He wasn’t in love with anyone, right? He never loved anyone like that. The only people he loved were his family. Sure, Jimin was fucking annoying, and he loved the dude, but he was in love with him.

The only person left was you and…no. He didn’t, he couldn’t, he shouldn’t. He can’t . There was no damn way.

He refused to believe.

Yet Namjoon remembered it clear as day.

An urgent early call from his doctor’s office sent him waiting in the examination room. He was restless, with dark bags under his worn-out eyes. He didn’t even bother to change. He was in his Ryan bear pajamas.

He scrolled through his phone, seeing the multiple texts from you and Jimin. You both were worried and wished him to get better while greeting him a wonderful Christmas. You sent a bomb of pictures of you and Jungkook with hearts to cheer him on, and it was enough for his heart to throb. He locked his phone and threw it in his pajama pocket.

His doctor, Dr. Min, came back into the room with a stoic expression as he read Namjoon’s file. “Good morning, Mr. Kim. I apologize for the short notice, especially on Christmas. But I just had to meet with you.”

“No need to apologize, Dr. Min.” The man said. “I was kinda glad you called. I—” He paused, trying to regulate his breathing. “I wanted to confirm.”

The doctor raised an eyebrow, “Did something happen recently?”

Namjoon bit his lips and nodded, getting antsy at the anticipation he caused. “I vomited, and I-I saw…blood and…,” He couldn’t say it. If he said it, he feared that it would come true.

Dr. Min didn’t let him finish his sentence as he nodded. Pulled out of his file was his recent x-ray. He brought it to the mounted screen and turned the lights on, displaying the condition of Namjoon’s body.

Roots grew through his lungs and around his heart. The silhouette of stems flourished all over his respiratory while the flowers weren’t as developed but expected to bloom soon. Bits of petals scattered around rested on his sternum with the most on his heart.

“I’m sorry, Namjoon. You’ve been diagnosed with stage three of Hanahaki Disease.” Dr. Min declared. “I know this is hard for you to take in, but I would like to tell you that my staff and I will do our best to help you in your next steps. But first, I’d like to ask you a few questions. Is that alright with you?”

Namjoon stayed silent, viewing his x-ray. He could only nod as the pain consumed his form. This was the truth, the reality he was living in.

“Do you know how long you’ve experienced symptoms?”

He shook his head.

“You did say you’ve been coughing for a while. Is that still happening?”

He nodded.

“When you coughed, was there blood?”

He nodded.

“Did you find petals?”

He shook his head.

“But when you threw up, there were petals?”

He nodded.

“When you vomited, was that the first time?”

He nodded.

“Do you love them?”

That very question snapped him out of his trance. He scowled at his doctor, wondering why he asked a personal question.

“Excuse me, Dr. Min. But isn’t that personal?” Namjoon couldn’t help but spit venom. He just found out he has a severe illness, and now his doctor wanted to know about his love life?

“It may seem personal, but this disease connects to love.” Dr. Min explained. “Namjoon, it’ll only worsen if you don’t admit it. That’s why the flowers are developing rapidly.”

He looked at his doctor, holding his stare. His eyebrows scrunched on his forehead with a large frown upon his mouth. Dr. Min waited patiently for his response, knowing what was gradually happening to him.

Thinking deeply about the question, his consciousness popped with a vague image. The picture subtly grew vivid at each second. Colors were lively, edges were pronounced, and the shapes were visible. By the time it was clear and detailed, a memory flashed in his very mind.

He stood on top of a roof. Inspecting around him, he realized it was his old apartment building years back. He saw the crowded shining city spanning across his vision. Buildings stood high and lit, groups of people walking down the streets, but still, he could only hear the soft white noise of the night. Light instrumental music resonated through the rooftop. It was all nostalgic. He missed the view, but more importantly, he missed the memories made here.

“Joon, dance with me,” A gentle voice begged as a small hand tugged his relatively larger one.

His head turned, presenting him with the prettiest, perfect sight. The glow in your skin shined brighter than the moon and sun combined. Your large glittering irises electrified his entire being. Your laugh rippled goosebumps on him, filling his body with sensation. Your smile captivated his very mind and soul. You intertwined his fingers with yours, your warmth coursing through his veins.

Everything about this was perfect. He never wanted to leave. He wished to stay like this forever. He loved every feeling. He loved every minute. He loved the memory. He loved the vision. But essentially—

He loved you.

Namjoon was in love with you, has been this entire time.

But you didn’t love him back.

You were in love with someone else.

The confession only brought painful tears to him as he let his emotions run loose. He scrunched his nose, sniffing uncontrollably. His mouth quivered hopelessly as little whimpers escaped. His gaze went down to his lap, noticing his trembling hands.

He never thought of the day he finally understood what love was. He was too analytical with his beliefs in the past. But he also gave himself some credit. Love was still an essence that powered emotions. All these interpretations and meanings were interconnected. You couldn’t have this without the other. It was more than a concept, more than a feeling.

Love was larger than life itself. Love was greater than anything in the whole universe. It was impossible to put a limit to love.

Perhaps, Jimin was right.

Love can do a lot for someone.

Namjoon refused to tell anyone about his condition. Not only did he have to say to them that he was slowly dying from unrequited love, but he would have to reveal his true feelings for you.

He couldn’t deny them any longer, he loved you with all his heart, and it was killing him. But if it had to be anyone to do it, it had to be you.

He knew he couldn’t tell you. You would blame yourself, crying to him that you wished you would have loved him back. But you did love him.

Just not in the way he loved you. It wasn’t your fault at all. You were the type to make anyone fall in love with you. Namjoon had to just be part of that statistic.

He knew he couldn’t have you, you were with Jungkook, and you loved that man dearly. He was good to you, the best even, probably more than Namjoon would have done.

For the following months, he continued occupying his life with work. He had to focus on things other than you since you were on his mind every waking moment. He thought it was best to keep his distance. Maybe the flowers inside him wouldn’t flourish rapidly.

But you were adamant in keeping him close. You confronted him, going to his work. Your irritation dissolved once you saw his sunken face and the dark in his eyes. He convinced you that he wasn’t eating adequately since he was constantly working. Then you begged him to have lunch with you, and he couldn’t say no to you. He was too weak.

Too weak for you.

He gave in and, at the very least, texted and called you, but less than before. Sure, he hung out with you and Jungkook but was less engaged. Lately, when you asked to hang out, he told you he was busy or needed to fly out last minute.

When in reality, he went to the hospital for his condition.

“You’ve been taking the prescription, correct? Three times daily?” Dr. Min inquired. And Namjoon nodded. The doctor examined the man, he looked weaker, but somehow his body was stronger in motor and movement than the regular people who had this illness.

Hanahaki Disease cases were rare and the first for Dr. Min’s long-time patient to be diagnosed. It wasn’t as successful, but when it did, there were still some downfalls, but the individual would be okay in the end. The doctor felt the need to provide the best for him, not fathoming what he was going through.

“Good, it helps the flower wilt. It doesn’t stop the process completely, but it gives more time.” Dr. Min clarified. “Your bodily functions are still running normally, so that’s good. But I can’t say you’re getting any better….”

His health was deteriorating, the symptoms increased, and not a day went by without him coughing or throwing up petals.

“I know, doc.” Namjoon sighed. A nurse came in to check his blood pressure.

“Since you’re at a high stage in this, it’s hard for a cure unless….”

“No.” The man interrupted, knowing what he was going to say. “She’s been dating a friend for a while now. Great guy and loves her dearly..”

Dr. Min noted and nodded carefully at his response. “There’s also surgery. Many people who were diagnosed refuse to take it; that’s also why the fatality of Hanahaki is high. However, a small percentage who do, don’t feel love for the other person. But there are consequences.”

“Like what?”

“It is likely you will never feel love again. The memories of your love for that person won’t exist anymore.”

“Isn’t that worse?” Namjoon knitted his brows. He feared a life without loving, without loving you. He’d probably feel empty inside, lingering around like a ghost. “How can someone live on without love?”

“I…I don’t know.” And for once, Dr. Min didn’t have the right answer. Namjoon accepted what he said; it wasn’t his doctor’s fault. He was only suggesting possibilities. “It’s just another option because, at this rate, the illness is going into the four-stage.”

“And what happens at that stage?”

“If something were to happen that speeds it up, the flowers would bloom all over your lungs, and you will die before the end of the year.”

To live without love or to die with love.

A question that has been running through the mind of Kim Namjoon. He didn’t have much time left, but he couldn’t get himself to make a decision.

Obviously, he didn’t want to die. There was still much more for him to do. He wouldn’t be able to do what he wanted. But…a life without love? How would that be plausible? No human would walk on Earth with no love in their body because everyone has to love something or someone deep down.

But the thing that heated his mind was never loving you. He has fallen in love with you since you both were 11. Every drop of love in his body was for you. You were the one who would give meaning to his memories. How would he survive moving on after you?

Namjoon was deep in thought when fingers snapped in front of his face. He blinked back into his surroundings. He was in his office, trying to email Hoseok about some future collaborations.

The culprit, Jimin, rested on one side of his body with his hands on his hips. He had a concerned yet annoyed face on him as he inspected Namjoon. “You’re wasting our precious lunchtime together zoning out.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes, quickly finishing up the email and sending it to his fellow art curator. As they walked up the street to the cafe, Jimin couldn’t help but take multiple takes at his friend.

“Stop staring. I’m not a fucking picture.” Namjoon caught his friend’s gaze.

“Dude, you don’t look so good.”

“Wow, thanks. That definitely helps with my self-esteem.”

“Stop joking. I’m serious.” Jimin refuted. “You look sicker. You barely eat, and you keep having colds.”

“I told you, Jimin. I’ve been going to the doctor, and it’s just stress—”

“ I’m literally a doctor. I can tell that this is more than stress. If you have something and you’re not tell—” An incoming call from Namjoon stopped Jimin’s rant. The shorter’s mouth thinned as he faced forward, waiting for the crosswalk to turn green.

Namjoon pulled his phone out, assuming it was Hoseok. But it was actually Jungkook. He rarely called and usually preferred texting to his introverted self. Nevertheless, he answered and greeted the man.

“Hey, thanks for answering. I really needed your opinion or like help with something.” Jungkook spoke out.

“No problem, man.” Namjoon grinned. “You know I’m always here to help. What’s up?”

“Well, I don’t really know how to say this….”

“You literally sound like ___ right now. It’s baffling.”

“Ugh, I—okay, fine. Obviously, you know ___ and I are together and in love, right?” A pain in his chest hit hard as Namjoon cleared his itchy throat. The crosswalk turned green, and the two began walking across. He hummed in response for Jungkook to continue. “Well, I’m gonna propose to her, and I want you to help me with her ring. You know her taste better than I do and—”

Namjoon stopped. He couldn’t hear anything after that. Jungkook started to sound like the adults from the Peanuts series. The words “I’m going to propose to her” echoed in his brain, repeated like a broken record. Was he hearing it correctly?

“I’m sorry, what? You’re what?” Namjoon forced himself to ask, praying that what he said wasn’t true.

“I’m proposing to ____? I want you to help me with t—”

His vision went fuzzy, his head feeling heavier than normal. His mouth became dehydrated while breathing went rapid. Namjoon couldn’t control his body shaking; everything went numb. His eardrums inflated, unable to hear the horns honking but only a long ringing sound amplified within seconds.

Jimin reached the end of the crosswalk but looked back to see why wasn’t his large friend was by his side. Jimin let out a sob. He saw his friend fall forward, dropping his phone. He ran up as he watched Namjoon vomit blood in the middle of the street.

He got down on his knees in distress, rubbing his friend’s back as he pulled out his phone to call an ambulance. Some people crowded the scene, even going as far as getting out of their cars to help them.

While Jimin instructed the hospital on their location, Namjoon gagged harshly, feeling stuck with something burning through his throat, almost like it was too large to even consume, let alone retched up.

“Yes, please. We’re here at W 6th and Namu Avenue.” Namjoon pushed as hard as possible, and the content finally came out. “Perfect, thank you,” Jimin said before ending the call. “They’ll come in five mi—Joon.…”

With barely enough strength, Namjoon open eyes and turned to see his friend’s aghast expression. Jimin felt himself grieving over him, the tears burst out of control and ran down his reddened cheeks. So Namjoon looked away, unable to see his friend’s crying. Then he suddenly realized why—

There lay blood-stained daisies in the pool of crimson, enough to make a bouquet. Loose petals plastered around, mocking creating a large heart surrounding the arrangement.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jimin whimpered, resting his forehead on the taller’s back. He felt the tears staining his shirt, but that was the least of his problems.

“I’ll give you two some time alone,” Dr. Min told them. He looked at his sickly patient, then towards Jimin. “Maybe talk him into it.”

“Thanks, Hyung.” Jimin nodded. Dr. Min excused himself and closed the door while Jimin kept his eyes on his friend.

After the incident, Namjoon lost consciousness. Jimin was there every step of the way and almost recklessly used his authority to get his friend help. Fortunately, Dr. Min was his supervisor and a good friend that came quickly when he found out what happened to his patient.

Namjoon woke up to them discussing his choices regarding this illness, but he stayed quiet and drank water. He knew Jimin was upset at him for not telling about his condition but was more afraid of him telling you , someone innocent in all of this.

“I know you’re still not feeling well, but I need to know, as your colleague, your friend, your brother, fuck as me! Someone who cares so much about you!” Jimin huffed, feeling frustrated at the situation. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

Namjoon chuckled, but nothing was light about it. “You really think I’d tell her? She’d blame herself, and it’s not her fault.”

“At least, why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m sure you’d say the same thing as Dr. Min….” Namjoon glowered, inspecting the needles and tubes attached to his wrist. “This is something that’s my problem. Because in all honesty, Jimin, what would you have done? You can’t tell me I shouldn’t love her. You can’t tell her to love me. There really wasn’t anything you could do.”

“But…but…I would have been there for you.” Jimin sniffed, his eyes glistening at the sight of his friend. “I would stay by your side even if you were getting worse. No one should go through this alone.” He walked up and gently clasped his hand, noticing how weak he’s gotten.

“How long since you’ve known?” Jimin licked his lips, trying to see any more pain in him.

“I don’t know, but the first time I saw flowers was during your Christmas party.”

“So you’ve been keeping this a secret for almost a whole year?” The shorter released his hold to pace around the room, having many emotions riling his body. “Joon, you’re dying, you know that? There’s no cure unless you do the surgery? Why haven’t you said yes?”

“Because there are consequences to it that I don’t know if I’d accept.” Namjoon had to stay calm. It was better this way, thinking it’d make his friends hurt a little less. “Why live a life without love?” Jimin kept silent, gathering his reasons for the hypothetical question. “The doctor said if I do the surgery, I can’t love again. Go on my life not loving? I’d live an empty life. I wouldn’t get married, have children, see them grow….”

“Technically, you still can.”

“Jimin, life would still be empty, and it would hurt everyone around me, including my parents, you, Jungkook, ___.” He cried at your name. “I can’t live without loving her. It’s hard. I loved her since I was 11, Jimin, and as it pains me to see her with someone else, I have to let her go.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that you’re dying!”

“And if I don’t love, I would be dead inside.” Namjoon smiled bitterly. “I lose either way.”

Jimin sighed, brushing his fingers through his hair. He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying his best to talk to him. “While you were unconscious, I talked with Dr. Min. He explained to me how there was a recent study on post-surgery for Hanahaki. There were about ten subjects. The researcher found that despite the common knowledge of not loving, there’s a 50% chance that you may feel it again.”

Namjoon’s eyes glimmered towards his friend, “What? How’d you get this?”

“Yoongi Hyung didn’t know much about the illness, so he had to go through studies and experiments to learn more about it. He stumbled upon this one issued almost two years ago by one of the nation’s prestigious schools.” Jimin articulated what he absorbed from his superior. “There’s still hope for you.”

“Jimin, I don’t know…I don’t feel like gambling my life like that.” Namjoon was uncertain. He was stuck in the middle because either he loved again or didn’t. With the adversity he has been under, the universe wasn’t on his side on this.

“You’re not gambling your life; you’re finding reasons to live, to love.” Jimin reasoned. “You can do all the things you wish to do. You shouldn’t give up, Joon.”

“I-I need time to think this through….” He concluded. There was the temptation to all of it, but he needed to think carefully about his decision. Right now, he’s emotional, Jimin’s emotional; this whole thing is an emotional mess.

“Though Dr. Min can’t say this, I can. You don’t have much time left. That scene triggered you going into the final stage. I don’t want you to die.” Jimin spoke his thoughts. “But whatever decision you make, I’ll be right by your side.”

“Thank you, Chim.” Namjoon nodded. “D-did you tell her? About my condition?”

The shorter breathed out before shaking his head, “No, I thought you would be the one to tell her. But she does know you’re in the hospital. She and Jungkook are in the waiting room. I said you fainted and threw up on the street.”

“You can’t tell her about it, please.” Namjoon pleaded. “I don’t want her to take the blame. None of this is her fault.”

Not arguing with him, Jimin questioned, “So what do we say? You’re dying, and you can’t say you have a fever.”

“Just say I have a tumor.”

“I don’t know if that’s worse or not….”

“I technically do, except instead of a tumor, it’s fucking daisies growing in my lungs!” Namjoon retorted. “Look, whatever it is, she can’t know that I have Hanahaki because she’ll find out I’m in love. She can’t know this, please.”

Jimin bit inside his mouth, “Fine, I won’t tell her, but make your decisions on the surgery soon.”

“Oh, Joon!” You cried, rushing towards him. You threw your hands over his body and sobbed. Jungkook trailed behind with a stuffed koala with a ‘Get Well’ balloon, then Jimin was the last to come back in before closing the door.

Namjoon didn’t like how sad you looked as he hugged you back. He caressed your hair before parting away to get a glimpse of you. You were whimpering, snot running down your nose, crocodile tears shedding, and the spark of pain yet relief in your eyes.

“Jimin told us what happened. We left work and sped here, we waited for hours, and… why didn’t you tell me you had a tumor?” You had so many questions, but this was taking priority.

Namjoon glanced at Jimin, who had his arms crossed over his chest. He nodded slightly, keeping the promise.

“Uhh, I didn’t want you to worry.” He answered softly.

“Now you’re in the hospital, on the brink of death!” You were hurt; he kept it from you, but more so, scared for his life. You didn’t want to lose your best friend.

“I’m sorry, it’s complicated…Doctor said I could go through surgery, but….”

“But? But what? Why don’t you?” You reached for his hands. It was a thing you used to do as children, and you did find a way to comfort each other.

But though it was comforting, it was also intensely painful for Namjoon.

His heart throbbed, but he contained the ache. He pushed your hands off of him and rested them on his lap.

“It’s just…it’s complicated.” He responded the best that he could without lying. He’s already lying so much more than he did in your entire friendship.

You stared at him, trying to comprehend what he said. You needed to understand, and you had a hunch that he wasn’t adequately telling you.

“Do you think you two can leave, so we can talk privately?” You rotated back at Jimin and Jungkook. The sense of desperation was oozing through your contact.

Jungkook nodded without missing a beat, understanding the privacy needed. He placed the koala on the table and mumbled reassurances to the taller. Jimin said nothing but followed your boyfriend out and closed the door behind him.

Now you two were alone.

It’s been a while since it was just you and him. You missed it. Though you tried your best, your days grew hectic, and schedules were tight, being unable to hang out with your best friend.

You observed his state, he lost the honey color in his skin, and the darkened puffs around his eyes were accentuated by his bloodshot eyes. His hair was matted and greased, not having its usual volume. His body looked thinner, seeing his bones popping out every now and then.

“I never would have thought you’d end up like this.” You spoke truthfully. “It pains me to see you like this, Joon.”

“I know, flower.” He agreed, not wanting to look you in the eye. It really could be damaging to him.

“Are you doubting the surgery? Is it the cost? The quality, because I can help you—”

“No, it’s not like that, flower. I promise.” Even at his weakest point, he strived to make you not worried for him. “It’s…there are consequences to the surgery that I don’t know if I could live with.”

“What do you mean?”

He tried getting himself together to come up with a reasonable explanation without saying too much, “The doctor said I’d lose feeling to some parts of my body.”

“And so…”

“So, I wouldn’t live my life the way I want to.” He sighed, thinking about his tender memories with you. His eyes started to swell at the possibility of it disappearing. “I would feel dead inside. I don’t know if I can survive like that.”

“Did he say anything else? Is there something that can counter that? I—was this only option?”

“He talked about some study on it and said there’s a 50% chance I could feel again. It’s just risky, you know? I’m shooting through hoops for it, and I’m….” His voice trembled in tone. “I’m tired. I’m tired of all of it. I wanna give up.”

“No, I refuse for you to give up.” You disapproved.

“No, it’s okay—”

“It’s not okay, Namjoon.” You seethed with rage, standing up from the bed.

“Look, flow—”

“No, I won’t let you. You used to tell me to never give up, stay hopeful, and that I’ll get better with time.” Your eyes welled with tears at the very thought of Namjoon giving up on himself. “Now that you’re giving up, you’re telling me to be okay with that?”

“Why not?” He bawled back.

There it was, what he’s been hiding from you—the loose, broken pieces shattered instead of being taped together like everything was fine.

When he first found out, he lost all hope in what he had to offer the world. He didn’t want to act upon being a human and grieve on his experience. It wasn’t like him. He wanted you to see him be okay and happy and work his way through life and obstacles with ease like he always wanted for you.

This was the first time you saw lost.

“I’m already dying. What’s the point, ___?” He broke down. “I can’t be strong anymore. It made matters worse. Look, I failed myself. I failed you as your best friend. I’m really a failure. I’ve been blinded by hope and being content, not noticing that I’m getting worse.”

You took in his words, trying to understand him. You saw him fall into a pit of insecurity and despair. It was scary for you, this being one of the few times you saw him like this. It was usually the other way around, and for that, you needed to be there for him. Comfort him like he did with you, care for him like he did with you, continuing on his side with love and support.

“Remember when Seokjin cheated on me, I asked you why things like that happened?” You pointed out, taking a step to sit back down.

“Yeah, you were a mess. You couldn’t stop crying.”

“Yeah, but I slept good that night.” You chuckled, earning a slight smile from him. “You said hurt is temporary, and you’ll heal from it.”

“Wow, I said that. I must have been a liar.” He joked, causing you to snort at his self-deprecation. He shifted his head out to the window, the sun setting for the day, bringing a soft, warm hue into his bleak room.

“No, you were telling the truth, and things got better.” You said. “But then I asked you if something was wrong with me because bad things kept happening.”

“What about it? There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“You called me one of the most special people out there.” You grinned, reaching over to his hands and intertwining them into yours. “If I’m one of the most special, Namjoon, you’re irreplaceable.”

He finally faced you. Your face was touched by the golden hour, the dried tears reflected. All the hope he once had was migrated onto you. The building of hope he helped you through the years was finally reflected. It was your turn to give back.

You sniff-kissed his palms, and it didn’t hurt him for once. It melted his troubles away for a split second and made his heart skip a beat in the way it was supposed to be.

“No one in this world can match you. You are like no other. You brought better days than I could never imagine, always thinking of others before yourself.” Your promising irises said it all, the truth of himself within. “The universe gives the hardest challenges to the most powerful, resilient ones because it knows how much you can endure. It’s testing you.”

Your grip was firm, more robust than his, as he applied pressure to your hands. “Once it’s over, you will be rewarded vastly. It’ll give you the best things, you name it. You won’t regret anything your heart faces and desires. Good will happen to someone like you. Please don’t give up.” You wheezed out, sobbing into your linked hands. “You’ll be alright, I promise. We’ll be here for you. I’ll be here for you.”

Namjoon joined closer to you, his forehead resting on the top of your head. You felt his tears dripping on your scalp, but that didn’t matter. You then embraced one another, refusing to let go. The dimming sun cascaded your shadows onto the white walls of the hospital room.

Serene was anything but you two. Instead, a fire ignited within, blazing a rush, lighting up the untapped potential inside both of you. The flames grew when together, too powerful for the world to see. So it was decided they had to stay apart, as they’re not always meant to last. Still, without their mirrored flame, if one died, so did the other.

Separation should never be permanent with you and Namjoon.

The day was young. The window was opened to lure fresh wind into his nostrils. He’s been in this room for days, but he won’t be in here any longer. He eyed the skinny cylindrical vase, and a single daisy emerged into the half-filled water. The decor was a small gesture from Jungkook, who got the idea from Jimin.

Though alone, that one daisy carried purpose to its life, creating beauty and awing anyone that surrounded it. It was the last one he probably would see for a while.

A knock interrupted his gaze from the vase. Following the sound, he found his doctor in the doorway with a bright smile.

“Ready?” Dr. Min asked.

Namjoon closed his eyes and breathed a final deep, flower-filled breath.

“Ready.”

The ceremony was absolutely breathtaking, with nothing but large smiles on everyone. Laughter filled the air, food filled their stomachs, and you and Jungkook’s love filled the entire reception. Everyone felt your eternal love, resonating with that very feeling in their own lives.

All but Namjoon.

After the successful surgery, he recovered quickly, bringing joy to your lives. But he lost his loving memories with you. He still remembered who you were, how you grew up, and the memories you made with him. He even knew why he had the surgery in the first place. But he doesn’t remember or feel ever being in love with you.

He was your best friend who you platonically loved.

Namjoon didn’t know what love was all together. It was something he couldn’t fully grasp. If someone were to ask, he gave an indefinite answer or a simple ‘I don’t know.’

He did feel like a big hole was in his chest, finding it difficult to get anything to fill it up. Days were long and tiresome. Things happen, things don’t. It was all mundane for him. He felt numb to the world at times. He doesn’t know if he regretted his decision.

But if there’s one thing he knew was that he cared. He cared a lot about his friends, work, and family, never wanting them to feel down or hurt. If they needed him, he’ll come in faster than you could say his name. He enjoyed being there for them. It made him happy.

But not enough to love, whatever that was.

You were his best friend he cared for.

He cared so much that he helped Jungkook plan his proposal with you and the wedding. Jungkook even begged him to be his best man, to which the taller agreed with flying colors.

In your opinion, the ask to be his best man was unexpectedly more notable than your own proposal.

Namjoon watched you and Jungkook dancing on the floor, nothing but smiles and stolen touches between the two. Even when crying, you were still happy with your husband. He was glad you finally found someone worthy enough for you, also glad you weren’t wasting your time with stupid boys who only cared about their dicks in something.

He wondered what it was having that, but he felt nothing. The crater in him only expanded. Was it even possible for him? It didn’t seem as interesting, so he pushed it aside.

“Hey, you okay?”

His head turned to see Jimin sitting beside him at their designated table. The doctor offered him a glass of wine, which he gladly accepted.

“Yeah, just watching.” He shrugged.

“You holding up alright?”

Namjoon’s lips twitched in dissatisfaction, “I think I’ve been before. I don’t know.”

Jimin peeked at the newlyweds and asked, “Do you’d ever tell her?”

“It happened; it’s already in the past. Just gotta move on.” He sighed. “Again, I know she wouldn’t forgive herself if I told her all about it.”

“I understand.” The shorter nodded, swirling his glass in his hand.

“But I will tell her what’s happening now. I think she needs to know that at least.” He took one more sip before putting it down on the table. He got up and headed in your direction.

Jimin smiled, seeing the last moments of you and your best friend together.

Namjoon tapped on your husband’s shoulder, catching their attention. He cleared his throat and pushed forth his hand in front of you. “May I have a dance with my best friend?”

Jungkook beamed at him and nodded willingly. He palmed the small of your back and assisted you to your friend. “Just don’t fall in love with you.”

You all laughed as Namjoon snorted, “Gross, never.”

Jungkook walked away, leaving you to sway to the soft beats of the music. You wrapped your arms around his nape while he palmed your sides firmly. He wasn’t the best dancer, but this was manageable. You both swayed seamlessly together, almost like your bodies were conditioned to.

You looked up at him. He was much healthier, cheeks protruded like when you were children, and his body grew thicker as he ate well and exercised more. But what pressed you was his eyes. Though being better, they struggled to keep luminosity. Some days were high; others were low. You assumed he had gotten moodier after the surgery, but still the authentic Kim Namjoon.

“Ummm, though I want you to enjoy your wedding, there’s something I needed to tell you. It’s important.” He announced as he took the lead in the dance. He unexpectedly twirled you around, making you squeal and grab the collar of his suit.

“You’re not dying again, right?” Though the tone seemed sarcastic, you hardened your face.

“No, I’m not.” He scoffed, playfully rolling his eyes.

“Good, you’re not allowed to leave me.” You pouted cutely.

“Well, I can’t say that I’m not gonna leave.”

“Huh, what do you mean?”

“I got a job offer to work in Madrid. Remember Hoseok? He referenced me to one of their museums, and they liked my work.”

“Oh, Joon! I’m so happy for you.” You congratulated him, then squeezed him tightly in your hug. “You’ll do great. When do you leave?”

“In a few months, I told Hoseok I needed some time to transition and finish up some work. I think it’ll be good, you know? A new change after my…tumor. Maybe I’ll feel better…I’ve been feeling stuck. I know I didn’t tell you right away, but you had the wedding and planning….”

“I don’t care. It’s fine. It’s understandable.” You smiled endearingly at your friend. “You know I’ll always love you, right?”

Namjoon crooned, “I love you too.”

Of course, he didn’t think he meant it, not grasping the words. It held no effect on him. But he knew that you enjoyed saying it to him, so to avoid any suspicions, he says it.

“You’re gonna be so far.” You frowned.

“Hey, I’m gonna call. We’ll do video calls now, and you’ll be able to explore Madrid vicariously towards me.” He promised, holding your form.

“You better…”

“Okay, enough about me. How do you feel?” He changed the subject to the meaning of tonight. “You’re a married woman.”

“It’s weird. My last name is now Jeon.” You stated. “I’m not used to it.”

“Could have been worse. Could have been Kim.” He quipped, making you throw your head back.

You scrunched your nose. Your grin morphed lower as a thought came up. “You remember Seokjin, right?”

“My God, why are you bringing up your ex on your wedding day?” He retorted. You gave a stern look, but it didn’t cause him fear. “But yes, what about him?”

“It wasn’t much about him. It was something he said after we broke up.” You squinted up as if it helped you remember.

“And?”

“Well, I ran into him in the cafeteria. It was like during finals. You weren’t there. You had your art analysis exam.” You recollected from the back of your mind. “He apologized, but it didn’t matter. But he told me he cheated because he knew he couldn’t win.”

“I know I’m not that experienced, but I don’t think a relationship is about winning,” Namjoon commented, still having the urge to punch that guy.

“No, no. He wasn’t like that. But I didn’t know what he was talking about at that time.” You breathed deeply and sighed. “He told me it was because of you.”

“Me? What about me?”

“He saw our friendship and deemed it as a threat.” You uncovered. “You and I were so closer, he felt like he was in the way and that he lost before it even started. ”

“But it wasn’t like that, right?” He probed, not thinking anything more. However, with your long pause and the discomfort on your face, it made him raise a brow at you. “___, speak please.”

“He got me thinking—what if it was you?” You shared. “That the love was much more than what we showed.”

The hypothetical question consumed his mind. It’s been a while since he was deep in thoughts like this. They were always meaningless and showed no impact. Similar to this one, inside him went blank.

“Can’t fathom it….” He could only say.

“I thought he was nuts, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought about wanting it to happen.”

That’s when Namjoon blinked dumbfounded at you. What did you mean by that?

“What did you say? W-why say it now?”

“Because it was in the past, and it stopped after meeting Jungkook.” You answered, reminiscing about those thoughts and feelings. “Now we’re good, happier now, and just look back at it and laugh.”

“You said it was in the past now. What did you think?” Namjoon wanted to understand, curious about what you were hiding from him.

“That…that I liked you. Maybe even falling in love with you??”

Namjoon only wished to have felt what you said, but it was all numb. “O-oh.”

“I’m sorry. Did I make you uncomfortable?”

“No, no. You’re not, flower. I’m…I’m just a bit surprised.” He denied it, inhaling slowly and releasing his breath.

“I was too. Now thinking back, it would have been very cliche.” You giggled. “We’re breaking stereotypes.”

“We’re unmatched.” He smiled, his dimples being emphasized. “What made you stop having those thoughts?”

You tilted your head and gazed to the side of you to find your reflections. “Mmm, I think our souls were destined to meet like we had a gravitational pull that couldn’t tear us apart. I thought about twin flames.”

“Interesting concept. Tell me more.”

“Kinda like two peas in a pod. We’re one soul split in between two bodies. We see things in us that others can’t.”

“Flower, you can’t say we’re twin flames when you just married your soulmate.”

“It’s different! Twin flames just understand each other to no avail, while soulmates are naturally compatible.”

“Then how did this make you stop? Because in my opinion, it only would lead to more.” He went being a devil’s advocate for no reason. Maybe a stab at you for his past self?

“Two fires together will only create a bigger fire.” You simply explained. “We were meant to be, but we aren’t meant to be.”

The two of you continued to dance, being the few left on the floor. Your loved ones looked at you, intrigued by the strength of your bond.

And it indeed was.

You were made to test and develop your very understanding of yourselves, energy, and one another. You provided active spiritual growth as each other’s catalysts, awakening your mirrored souls. You pushed each other to release your wounds, remove any blockage that came your way, and help to lead you to true love, whether it was self-love or finding the love of your life.

Right before his surgery, Namjoon wondered what would have happened if you had reciprocated his love for you. Would it have been a happily ever after? Or ruin your friendship through the combustion too much for you both to handle?

What if you saw in him what he saw in you? What if you spoke to him like he spoke to you? What if you thought of him like he thought of you? What if life hurt you like it did with him? Would you ever love him the way he loved you?

He will never know.

But above all, he was glad to be with you, even if it meant being only your best friend. You continued your life and yourself, attached to his existence.

And if he lived a hundred years, for a hundred years, he’ll think of you.

#namjoon fanfic #namjoon angst #namjoon x reader #namjoon x you #kim namjoon #bts x reader #bts fanfic #matcha masterlist

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