#no but in all seriousness y’all know how little kids pick up habits from the authority figures they look up to/spend the most time with??

[deadbeatdadjokes]

Rouxls does not give a fuck if Lancer swears btw have y’all heard that man??? for all we know Lancer got it from HIM bc he sure as hell ain’t hangin out with his father often enough to adopt that behavior he probably thinks it is really funny and swears on purpose around him to the point where Spade had to implement some sort of convoluted tier system just to get him to stop bc he couldn’t take Lancer busting into the strategy meetings yelling “WHATS UP FUCKERS” at the top of his lungs

[nightcolorz]

Random Gotham Rogues Headcanons

(In honor of all the wonderful people who wanted more after my last post, yes I see y’all)

*Jonathan has a huge sweet tooth, the poor bastard didn’t try sugar until he was like 12 and eats candy like it’s his last meal.

*He’ll forget he needs food to live for way too long and eat a gallon of ice cream or some shit that’ll give any sensible man heart palpitations and just be like “😐👍”.

*Selina tells the newer rogues she was raised by cats to freak them out, Jervis still believes her. (Tbf, Selina does walk around with a cat tail on hissing at people and purring on their laps, I don’t blame him).

*Edward has a tiktok account that he made to fule his own ego, he’s a fragile little shit, literally all of his hate comments have video responses (as you can imagine, Edward gets A LOT of hate comments).

*One time a teenager called Edward “submissive and breedable” and he was too baffled to make a clap back.

*The Rogues have a surprising amount of stans. Ivy’s fan base consists mostly of lowly simps, Joker gets stopped on the street daily by greasy redditors and zealous scene kids.

*No one likes Joker, he thinks it’s because he’s “Batman’s favorite” (it’s not).

*For a while Joker has been insistent that he fucked Bruce Wayne once at one of his many parties, no one believes him except for Harvey (begrudgingly).

*He says it’s “Perfectly in character for Bruce” as much as he may hate it.

*Selina denies everything.

*Oswald and Jonathan share solidarity as “the weird bird people”. At first Oswald was a little put off that Jonathan only held knowledge of crows but soon got over that when he realized that now he had an excuse to infodump on someone who might actually be interested.

*Every time Jonathan visits Oswald’s aviary to pick up Nightmare and Craw Oswald jumps at the opportunity to talk about his numerous birds in excess, Jonathan’s a surprisingly good listener.

*Despite Edward and Joker’s long term rivalry Edward has remained relatively civil when faced with Joker’s constant egging on. That is until one iconic day in Arkham Asylum when Edward beat the absolute, ever loving shit out of Joker in the cafeteria. To this day no one knows what exactly got him to snap, not even Joker.

*Harley keeps a scrapbook about all her misadventures + friendships as a rogue, she has a habit of taking pictures of the others at the most inappropriate times (during a heist, while being beaten to a crisp by Batman, ex).

*One time Harley asked Batman to pose for a picture to put in her scrapbook, he obliged to everyone’s surprise.

*Edward is wholly insistent that he doesn’t belong in Arkham, and is convinced he’s completely sane. He’s weirdly obsessed with the fact that Oswald is sane “as well” and will make unprompted snide remarks like: “Blackgate sounds terrific, unfortunately I’ve been misplaced among MORONS, it’s a shame that the system is too incompetent to properly judge my un-categorizable psyche.”

*Oswald usually responds with a simple “🙂👍” or “ok” to avoid conflict, disagreeing with Edward could be catastrophic.

*Art therapy is an occupational hazard for all the Arkham staff. (Seriously, who thought giving super villains an outlet to express themselves was a good idea).

*Edward can’t draw so he spends his time harshly criticizing the other rogues art, that’s caused more than a few fights. The one time Edward’s ever actually done art in art therapy was when he drew a green triangle and explained in complex detail how he colored it to perfection.

*Jonathan is no longer allowed to share his art with the group before having it reviewed by a staff member after emotionally scarring a few patients. He’s one of the few rogues who presents his art every time, just to see the disturbed looks on the others faces when he explains whatever twisted art piece he came up with this time.

*Jervis is probably the most dedicated artist of the bunch, he‘s not allowed to make himself any hats (for obvious reasons) but he’s still a very skilled seamstress and has a very interesting art style (Jervis tries not to draw anything explicitly linked to Alice in Wonderland in fear of getting repercussions, as rogues often do when they engage with their ‘personas’).

*Harvey isn’t very technically skilled in drawing, but Harv usually spices their art up enough to make it interesting. Their drawings are always two themed, as expected. One time Edward criticized a painting of theirs for being “too unrealistic” and Harv had to manually restrain himself from kicking Edward in the teeth.

*Victor can’t draw either, but he writes pretty good poetry. His writing is excessively melodramatic and flowery, and his themes even more so. Half of the presentation period is spent listening to Victor muse about the meaning of life or some shit, his poems are VERY long.

*Waylon and Ivy are the obligatory pretentious painters, both have a fondness for flowers (for very separate reasons). The two will often compare their paintings and wax poetics about the beauty of nature or some bullshit before never speaking again. That’s one of the positives of Art therapy, it brings rogues together who would otherwise not grant each other a passing glance.

*Group therapy is just as (if not more) atrocious than Art therapy.

*The only one who ever talks is Joker (and sometimes Harley, but way less).

*Joker is the embodiment of an irl troll, he does a much better job at getting responses from the other rogues in therapy than the therapists ever could (usually hostile responses but still).

*Occasionally a new and bright eyed therapist will try and coax childhood memories out of the rogues, it never ends well (usually with the rogue or the therapist in hysterics).

*The majority of the Arkham staff are either terribly unqualified or terrible period.

*Music Meister lived with Edward for a short while after escaping Arkham together but he was promptly kicked out because he wouldn’t stop singing.

*Selina and Ivy had a huge argument once because Selina’s cats nibbled on Ivy’s plants.

Okay this post is all ready super long so I’m gonna end it here, as I said last time I can always make more if you guys like these (I’m not running out of headcanons anytime soon!)

[hangovercurse]

Teeny Tiny Secret

After months of trying, you and Colson finally get those two pink lines… the day before tour starts.

Request: “I know that requests are closed, but I HAD to share this before it left my mind. When you have an opportunity, could you please write a story where y/n is in super early (not showing or anything) stages of pregnancy and on tour with mgk. She & Colson make a plan to keep it from the bandmates for now. It becomes difficult when he becomes super over protective (not letting her carry anything, not wanting the guys to crowd her), unconsciously put his hand on her stomach, and ordering non-alcoholic drinks for her. The band suspects something. Y/n talks with him to try to get him to calm down a little. It works until the guys ask you both about it directly and Colson's the first to crack.”

Colson Baker x Reader

Warnings: Cursing

A/N: Y’all are all up in that spring baby fever… this is like my 3rd or 4th baby request recently

Word Count: 2211

You and Colson had been talking about having a second kid for months but stopped trying a few weeks before tour started. You didn’t think it had worked until you woke up three days before tour and rushed to the bathroom, morning sickness wrecking your body. Colson felt you getting out of bed and followed a few minutes later, tiredly. When he found you hunched over the toilet, his whole demeaner changed.

You knew for sure the day before tour, after multiple pregnancy tests you had gone to see an OBGYN for confirmation. Sure enough, you were pregnant. The universe sure knew the definition of ironic timing.

Colson’s immediate reaction was to have you stay home. “All the traveling and partying isn’t gonna be good for him.” He said, pacing around your bedroom while you laid on the bed. “Tour life is not good for babies.”

You raised your eyebrow, “him? It’s been one day and you’re already setting unrealistic expectations for our unborn child.” You joked, a small smile on your lips.

Colson’s mouth gaped before he continued, “Y/N, we need to be serious about this. You can’t come on tour if you’re pregnant.”

You rolled your eyes, “Colson, I am not letting you leave me here while I am pregnant. I’ll be fine. I won’t drink and I’ll take it easy. You just have to make sure the guys don’t smoke around me and we’ll be fine.”

His eyes went wide. “Shit, the boys.” He paused to think as confusion crossed you. “If the boys find out about this they’ll freak out and then the whole tour is gonna be a shit show.”

It was kind of funny how much more worried he was than you were. “Babe, come here.” You motioned for him to come sit in the bed with you to which he complied. You leaned your back against the headboard, expecting him to follow. Instead, he laid so his head was next to your stomach. He pressed a small kiss into it, making your heart fluttered, the reality of the situation hitting you and making you insanely happy. “Why are you so worried?” You asked him softly, combing your hand through his hair.

He reached, moving your shirt up so he could kiss your bare stomach. He mumbled against your skin, “I think I wanna keep this a secret for now.” You hummed and he continued, “just for us, y’know? I wanna enjoy this.”

You nodded, “I’m still coming on tour with you, though. I don’t wanna be alone right now.”

He smiled against your stomach, finally moving up to sit next to you, pulling you towards him for a soft kiss. His hand went to your stomach, rubbing circles into the skin. “I can’t believe we’re gonna have a fucking baby.”

You smiled against his lips, a thought popping into your head, “can we tell Casie at least?” His eyes lit up at your suggestion, a quick nod of his head affirming the idea.

 The next day was hectic, as all first days were. You had gotten a list of everything you could and couldn’t do from your doctor, and the all-clear to fly for the first trimester. So, you and Colson found yourself with the crew at LAX airport bright and early in the morning. Ashleigh passed you an itinerary, letting you know that you would all be meeting the bus in Cleveland, where the first show was.

Colson’s arm hadn’t left your waist since you got to the airport, holding you to his side all morning. Occasionally you could feel his thumb rubbing circles near your stomach, something that was definitely becoming a habit of his. At one point he ended up standing behind you, hands resting on your stomach as he held you against him. You tried not to give anything away, but you found it adorable how excited he was. He wanted to be as close to the unborn baby as possible at all times, his hands constantly near your middle.

Eventually you arrived in Cleveland, walking down the long hallway to the baggage claim, taking in the small Cleveland hall of fame that the airport had created. You spotted your suitcase and went to grab it, but Colson beat you to it. “I got it, babe.” He gave you a look that let you know you wouldn’t be carrying anything.

You sighed, “I can get it Colson.” He shrugged, grabbing his bag off of the carousel next. The man now had a large duffel bag slung over his shoulder and two suitcases in his hands. “Seriously, it’s not that heavy.”

He shook his head, “I’m not letting you carry anything heavy. I can do it.” You sighed but let him, knowing you wouldn’t win this battle.

Unbeknownst to you, Baze had seen the whole interaction and was very confused.

 Later, once you had arrived at the arena, you were hanging in the dressing room with Slim and Irv on the couch. You guys weren’t really talking about anything in particular, mostly just cracking jokes about Rook’s outfit for the night.

When the younger boy heard Slim say he looked like “if Willow Smith and Gerard Way were put into a blender,” he came over, blunt in his hand.

Rook started jokingly arguing with Slim and you were all laughing at his distress. In the middle of their argument, however, Colson came over and grabbed the blunt out of Rook’s hand. He put it out in an ashtray before returning to you, squeezing himself between you and Irv.

Everyone, including you, stared at him, dumfounded. “Dude why the fuck-“ Rook started, only for Colson to cut him off.

“You shouldn’t smoke in here.” He shrugged, arms wrapping around you. He squeezed your waist, letting you know why he really did it. You were somewhat thankful; smoke was bad for the baby. But there are less obvious ways to have gone about that.

Rook grumbled but didn’t attempt to light another one. Slim looked at you, an eyebrow raised in question. You shrugged your shoulders, pretending to act innocently naïve to Colson’s behaviors.

Eventually the three boys travelled from the couch, leaving you and Colson alone. “Babe, you gotta try and be a little more subtle about that shit.” You mumbled, turning to face him.

He scrunched his eyebrows, “he shouldn’t be smoking around you. What else was I supposed to do?”

You sighed, “I don’t know, but that wasn’t subtle. If you keep treating me differently, they’re gonna figure out that something’s up.”

Colson lets out a breath through his nose, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “I’m sorry, I just don’t want anything to happen to…” he trailed off, trying to keep a low profile.

“I know you’re just being careful. It’s sweet, and I really appreciate it. But either we tell the guys what’s going on or we figure out how to be more subtle.” You thought you guys were being quiet, but once again Baze was standing just within earshot, hearing your entire conversation.

 Colson demanded you stay backstage instead of in front of the gates like normal tours. “I don’t care if they think something’s up, you are not getting anywhere near that crowd.”

This was something you could actually agree on, not wanting any crazy fangirls to try and reach over the barricade and hurt you by accident (it had happened before). So, you were stood backstage before the concert, like normal, only this time you had a spot next to the stage picked out just for you to watch. Colson came over to you, jumping up and down in excitement.

You giggled at his happy demeanor, feeding off his energy. “Good luck kiss?” You offered to which he happily nodded. You pulled him in by his shoulders, intending to give him a soft kiss. Colson being Colson, however, decided that this was the perfect time for an extremely heated make out session.

You didn’t complain much as his hands explored your waist, paying special attention to your stomach, where a small bump would soon be forming. His lips against yours were heaven.

“Okay loverboy!” Ashleigh called, making him pull away from your lips but he kept himself close to you. “You’re on.”

He nodded towards her, giving you one last peck before running off to the stage. Before he left, his hands lingered on your stomach just a little longer than normal, his eyes glancing down to it for a split second.

Then you watched the love of your life run towards the stage, a grin on his face. “I love you!” You called. He turned to you right before he got on stage and mouthed the words back to you, knowing you couldn’t hear him anymore. You smiled, the sight of him living his dream making your heart melt.

Slim was on the side of the stage closest to you, and had caught the last moments of your intimacy, including Colson’s attention to your stomach. He perked and eyebrow at the sight but shook it off as Colson being into some weird new thing.

 After the show, everyone was hyped up on adrenaline and alcohol. The crew decided to move the party to a nearby club. Colson wanted to take you back to the bus and stay there with you all night, but you made him go. “Colson, I have been in this condition for all of 3 days. I am fine. You just finished the first show of your tour. We,” you pointed between the two of you, “are going out to celebrate, even if that means I can only drink water or pop.”

He rolled his eyes but gave in, letting you drag him down the street towards the rest of your friends. When you got to the club, you grabbed a table with Ash, Irv, Baze, and Slim while Colson took Rook to get drinks for everyone.

When the pair got back, they started handing out drinks. Colson set a glass of water in front of you, causing the group to raise eyebrows at you two, which you just shrugged off, sipping the water. As much as you would have loved to get wasted with your friends, you knew it would hurt the baby. You tried to act as nonchalant about it as possible, realizing that it was gonna be hard to hide your secret if you got water every time you went out.

This was going to be a long 9 months.

“I wanna dance.” Ashleigh said, grabbing Irv and Rook and dragging them to the floor. You grinned, about to stand up and join them when you felt a hand on your thigh. You turned towards Colson, who was currently stopping you from having fun, giving him a glare.

He shook his head slightly at you, leaning close to you to whisper in your ear. “There’s a lot of people here, I don’t want you to get hurt.”

You sighed and rolled your eyes, whispering back, “can you ease up a little bit, please? I’ll be careful. I want to have a little fun before I’m not able to move at all.”

His face was stern, the two of you having a silent argument with your eyes. You pleaded with him, trying to get him to crack but he just shook his head.

Meanwhile Baze and Slim watched you two, trying to figure out how the hell you were communicating without actually talking. “Is everything okay with you two?” Slim asked, pulling your attention to the two men.

You nodded, smiling, “yeah, we’re great.”

Baze cocked his head, “you sure? Because he’s” he pointed at Colson, “acting like you’re pregnant or something.”

You felt Colson’s hand on your thigh tighten, his entire body stiffening. You giggled, trying to play off the comment. Baze started laughing the moment he saw Colson’s expression, which you turned to see was like a deer caught in headlights. Slim’s eyes went wide, “holy shit, for real? Congrats guys!”

You laughed, rubbing Colson’s shoulder, “good job, babe. You did a great job at keeping this between us.”

He looked down at you with a sheepish expression, “sorry, I thought we were being subtle.” He mumbled and you laughed.

“Cols, I was being subtle. You were acting like I was gonna die if someone so much as touched me.” Slim and Baze chuckled at this, and you turned to explain. “We found out for sure yesterday and didn’t want anyone to get freaked out or throw off the tour or anything. So, Colson here,” your head nodded towards your boyfriend, “thought we could keep it a secret for now.”

He frowned, his friends still laughing at him. “Dude, you are the worst secret keeper ever, man.” Baze said. “It took one push and you cracked.” You giggled, nodding your head in agreement. “But seriously, congrats guys.”

“Thanks, B.” You said, “but listen, both of you. If anyone on this tour tells me what I can and can’t do because I’m pregnant, I’ll cut their dick off.” The two boys nodded in understanding.

“Am I really that bad at keeping secrets?” Colson asked, still upset that he spilled.

You giggled and nodded, “Yeah, darling. You are.”

[xsugarysweetsx]

I hope I got this right it's kind of a mess

May I request option 3 with Oikawa please 😅

A bit about me : I'm 4'9 a bit on the chubby side with tan skin and shoulder length black hair

Personality type is ISTP. I'm quiet and awkward but once I get to know u I can't stop talking. I can be a bit lazy/introverted sometimes but if I'm with friends I know how to have fun. I seem kinda cold and distant but that coz I don't really know how to show affection, but I do care v much. I'm a ppl pleaser and tend to follow the rules so I can blend with the crowd. (I seriously need an outgoing person in my life 😐) love quiet places, bookstores, theme/water parks, reading, watching anime and frozen yoghurt. I have a vintage/kawaii? aesthetic

For the scenario : fluff with some spice at the end maybe? 👀

How about Oikawa finally having a break after volleyball season to spend with his family. He just wants to sleep in with u but the kids have other ideas so they end up going to the beach. Oiks is just being a child himself and having fun with his kids making sandcastles and swimming while u r chilling with one of the kids coz u both don't like the sun. Maybe oiks crashes a beach volleyball game just to show the random strangers how it's done 😌

Again congrats on the milestone and Thank you 😗 ily

A/N; don’t worry this is just fine! And thank you♥️

warnings; Spicy near the end~ not too much tho!

Please enjoy~

***************************************************

"It's so nice to have you home after so long" you sigh cuddling into your husband's side

He had finally gotten a break from volleyball and now he could spend time with you and your kids. After marrying Oikawa things were a bit hard when it came to quality time. It was even harder after you had become pregnant. He wanted to always be with you but at the same time, he had to be at his games.

Luckily he and his team had gotten about 3 months off, the same as summer vacation. It was one of those rare days when he got to sleep in with you. No early morning jogs, or workouts, just cuddling with his favorite person.

"Yeah, it seems like the only time we cuddle is late at night when I get home but," he shuffles to face you completely "now I'm here and we can sleep all we want" he lays a hand on your waist

"mm yeah" you hum snuggling in for some more sleep

"Mama! Let's go to the beach!" your son came marching in followed by his younger sister

"Yeah, papa! Beach!"

*Sigh*, so much for rest. S/N climbs onto your side of the bed while D/N makes grabby hands to be lifted up. Oikawa lifts her with ease and onto his stomach. You lift your son to sit between you both, here was the center of both your worlds. Your son was 7 and your daughter was 4. They were both polar opposites, D/N was basically a mini Oikawa and your son took more of your attitude.

"well so much for rest..." he sighed "how does the beach sound princes?" he asked you. Ah yes and, you were stationed with him in Brazil while he was on their team. It was almost like constant summer there. Although by the time the kids would be older he wanted to go back to Japan. For now, where you were was just perfect.

"sigh...maybe some sea breeze would be nice" both your kids start to jump on the bed with cheers and smiles "Alright, alright everyone, get dressed and then some breakfast and we can head out."

They stopped quickly and ran to their rooms to grab what they wanted.

"I love how you handle them" Oikawa complimented you with a kiss on your cheek "Come on, I wanna see you in a two-piece!" he shouts down the hall going to help the kids get ready. Going into your drawer you dig through your clothes until you come across a two-piece

"Hmmm, maybe not this time--oh! I remember this one!" you said pulling out one piece from the bottom. It was your favorite color with a low cut back and winches waist. Sure bikinis we’re the race right now but this really made everyone turn their heads. Especially a certain captain ;)

Slipping into the swimsuit you ready yourself with your sandals, bag, glasses, and other necessities. Mostly things for the kids like sunblock, towels, some beach toys, hats, and so many other things. To think you used to only take sunblock and maybe a book, thing change when your a parent huh?

"where is my darling wife? We're just about--whoa there! Hy if you look that good I might drop the kids off at my sister's place" he smirked coming over to you and wrapping you in his arms "Mmm you're just too beautiful for other men to see" he whined

"Well, too bad Mr, the kids want to go to the beach, and besides we haven't gone in a while. It'll be fun, come on" you said taking his hand in your and leading him back to the kitchen. kids were fed and ready, with huge grins on their faces. Usually like walking to the beach with them since it was only about a 10-minute walk.

locking up the doors and putting on some sunblock before you left you're on your way to enjoying a nice beach day. Walking along you say hello to neighbors and store owners. Y/D/N was sat atop of your husband's shoulders, while your son held your hand skipped along the sidewalk. You love to have moments like this. Happy simple moments together.

"Look, Papa!" your daughter points to the yellow-white sand of the beach with beautiful Crystal waves crashing onto the shore. A satisfying salty smell was in the air that filled your heart with excitement.

"Come on bud" Oikawa squats down to pick up your son. He had a habit of not letting them walk in the hot sand, his way of being an "awesome dad". But he was right, it was very thoughtful of him, he even did it to you before.

After finding a good spot he put down both your kids and helps me to set up. You open up the umbrella spread out some blankets and put down your small bag where you had carried some snacks and other necessities.

"Come here kids, you need your block" they both line up so that you can spray and lotion them down. Being in Brazil the sun was much closer than in Japan. Which meant sunscreen was a must!

"You too Toru, come here." you motion with your finger. he practically skipped over to you and plopped down on his knees ready for you to lotion him up. now listen, this was a way of kind of establishing your place to other girls who were around you. Some of them would give you looks and you would just smile back as you applied sunscreen to your husband.

"You turn lovely~" grabbing the lotion he turns to you and starts to apply. Starting gently at your face, then to your shoulders, your arm, your thighs (his favorite), and your back

"Alright, who wants to get into the water?" He said excited standing up

“Me, me Papa! Me!” Your little girl was excited as ever and of course a daddy’s girl. Picking her up abs jogs over to the water, leaving giggles behind

“What about you sweetheart? You want to join your father and sister?” You ask your son and he shakes his head coming over to your side

“I’ll just stay here mama” your son was a lot like you in a way. While your husband preferred to be in the spotlight, you and he preferred to cheer him on from the sidelines. Either way, you had company now. Climbing onto your lap he lays against you as you both enjoy the salty breeze.

You always loved the smell of the ocean, the calm saltiness in the air, the subtle sounds of the waves. It was coming, a bit strange but you really enjoyed it. An even better view was watching Toru enjoy himself. He held your daughter in the air and brought her down when a gentle wave would come and hit them both.

It’s then you saw your husband‘s eyes light up like Christmas lights. He then screws over to a volleyball game puts his daughter on the sideline and begins playing with them. He didn’t know whether to laugh or scold him, or maybe both. He eventually had a ball set over to him and he spiked it over the net. Then again you knew he couldn’t help himself whenever this would happen. You can only count the number of dates on the beach where the same scenario would happen.

It ended up with him apologizing for getting sand in your eyes. About half an hour later they came back, a bit sleepy from all the energy they had just used up. Sitting under the umbrella you bring out the snacks and juices. Everyone enjoyed their favorite sandwich, and small side snacks, and favorite drink. Looking over at your phone you had seen the time went by and it was already past three in the afternoon.

After one more return to the ocean all together y’all start to pack your things and head home. Your daughter fell to sleep on Toru’s shoulder on the way back home. Just as you enter your home the cloud started to roll in. This was your favorite part about beach trips when they ended and rainy days, it just made everything so much cozier.

After putting your son and daughter into bed for their naps you make your way to the bathroom to wash off all the sand. Getting in for us to turn on the warm water and close your eyes. The warm liquid cascading down your body relaxes in your muscles, meanwhile, the thunder clapped in the background faintly. You hear the shower curtain move slightly making you look over your shoulder.

"Hey," he said softly coming closer and pulling you towards him by your middle. He loves to do this, taking a calm shower with you close to him. Nothing really sexual about it but more intimate, and heartwarming. He felt closer to you, more content. Although sometimes it did lead to something more. But overall he loves to have a little alone time with you.

His hands squeeze your body slightly as his lips find your shoulder and neck.

"What are you getting at?" you giggle biting back a sigh

"Mm nothing, just admiring my wife's body is all," he answers a few seconds later you feel something poke at you

"Well, I would ask what's in your pocket--but obviously I can't"

"Well, is there asleep, and we have all night long~" his tongue Finds Its way gliding from your neck of your earlobe and taking it between his lips. He gives a small nipple and a chuckle escapes his chest.

"Aren't you tired from the beach?" you ask turning around and wrapping your hands around his neck

"I'll have to remind just how much stamina a volleyball player can have," he growls picking you up with easy and pinning you to the cool wall making gasp "and we have about, uuhh 7 hours until midnight"

Oh boy, you were in for a long night~

*****************************************************

I hope this was okay! ♥️

[otakusheep15]

SFW Alphabet - Asmodeus

Asmo is the exact opposite of sfw, but I still think this’ll be fun lol. 

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He is super affectionate and in multiple ways. He mostly shows his love through verbal praise. He’ll constantly hype you up, even over mundane things. Also really loves physical affection obviously. Not a moment passes where he isn’t touching you in some way. Other than this, he likes buying you things, especially clothes. 

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

You two go clubbing every single night. He’ll also be the perfect wingman and can get you a date in three seconds. Self-care days are a must for him, and he’ll drag you with him. Shopping trips are also quite common, and you two model outfits in the changing rooms for hours. 

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

This boy is a sucker for cuddles. One never knows what to expect with him though. Will he simply just lie down and cuddle you? Will he try and go farther? It’ always a gamble getting into bed with him. He also sleeps naked, so prepare for that. 

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Out of all the brothers, he’s the least likely to settle down. Obviously he loves you, but he is the Avatar of Lust. Chances are, one person just wouldn’t be enough to fulfil his desires, so he’s very hesitant to settle down. If you really beg him, he’ll do it, but he just doesn’t feel like it, and you might just have to accept that from him. 

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Honestly, it wouldn’t be so much of a breakup as much as him just wanting to see other people as well. Like I said, one person just isn’t enough for him, so he’d still want to keep the relationship open. If you can’t accept that from him, then he’d just break it off with you. He wouldn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t understand him, so he’d just tell you straight up that it isn’t working between you two. 

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Same with settling down, I just can’t see him wanting to get married. He’s also not very good at commitment honestly. If you plan on getting married, he isn’t the one for you. Again, if you really, REALLY begged for it, he might consider, but it would most likely have to be an open marriage. 

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He’s surprisingly gentle with you. He still loves you regardless of his sin, and he treats you like royalty. It’s non-stop pampering and sweet words with him. Of course, you two might get into petty arguments here and there, but he’s quick to make up with you and remind you how much he cares. 

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Hugging is one of his favorite forms of physical affection. In public especially, he’ll usually have an arm wrapped around you, or he’ll be hugging you from behind while you two are just standing. He also likes picking you up and spinning you cause he thinks it’s cute. 

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He says it pretty fast, but not all that seriously. It’s kinda like how friends say it to each other, so he means it, but not in a couple way. However, the first time he says it and means it is actually takes a lot longer than expected. He’s never been involved in romance too much, so it’s still new to him. 

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He’s probably the least jealous of the brothers. In all honesty, he’d feel kinda hypocritical if he got jealous over you despite flirting with literally everyone. It’d be more likely that he’d let you do whatever you want as long as you reassure him that he’s still your favorite, and he’ll do the same. If you get super jealous, I’d suggest not dating him lol. 

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses can go one of two ways. The first are super quick, just a way to show you off to others. The other way is super passionate and filled with emotion. There is no in between with him. He likes kissing you pretty much anywhere, but his favorite is your thighs cause he thinks they’re cute. His favorite place to be kissed is his back since it’s so sensitive. 

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He thinks kids are cute, but only from a distance. If they even try and come near him, he will punch one. While he does think they’re cute, he also thinks they’re gross, germ-carrying monsters and he will not allow one in his vicinity. 

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

He usually wakes up pretty early cause of his care routine, but he does try his best not to wake you up. If you stay asleep, he’ll get started on his routine and wake you up when he’s done so that you two can go eat. If he does wake you up, he offers for you to join him, or just sit with him while he finishes up. 

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights are spent mostly the same as the mornings, but in reverse. After dinner, he goes and takes a nice bath and gets ready for bed. Of course, he wants you to join him in the bath, but if you don’t that's fine. He’ll just have you wait for him in his room, and then he’ll get you both ready to sleep. If you don’t want to sleep naked, he understands, but that doesn’t mean he won’t try and convince you to at least once. 

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He only reveals the shallower side of himself cause that’s all anyone is usually interested in with him. However, once he sees that you mean more to him than anyone else, and that you do truly love him, he’ll begin to open up with you little by little. He’ll begin  spilling all of his darkest secrets and insecurities, and he knows that you’d never tell another soul about any of it. 

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

To be honest, he probably the most passive out of the brothers. I mean, he’ll stand up for you if a demon is harassing you or he’ll get upset if another brother is stealing you away from him too much, but he never gets all that mad about it. The only time he’d get genuinely mad is if someone won’t leave you alone even after you’ve told them to, or if someone actually hurts you.  

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He pretends like he doesn’t remember anything, but that’s only to surprise you later when he actually does. He’s another brother with a great memory, and he uses it well. You look at something a few second longer than normal while window shopping? Boom, it’s in your room the next day. You have an important day coming up? He’s there, ready to support you however you need. 

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

His favorite moment in your relationship was the first time you two went clothes shopping together. He had so much fun that day, spending the whole time modeling ridiculous outfits that you picked out for each other. You didn’t end up buying much, but it was still fun. After that, you two spend the rest of the day in his room just lounging around and vibing with each other in peace. Maybe something happened later that night, but that’s a secret. 

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Like the others, he’s super protective of you. He doesn’t show it as often, but he is still there for you no matter what. He’s especially protective of you when you two are out shopping or at a club. He knows how some demons can get when they see a weak human, so he knows he has to keep a constant eye on you. If someone gets too close for his or your liking, they’re getting erased from existence. 

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts in SO much effort. This boy is so over-the-top with literally everything, and this is no exception. To him, you’re almost as perfect as he is, and he needs to show you that. He goes all out for every single date, and will do whatever you want. Honestly, he knows all of your likes and dislikes, so he will cater to whatever you find pleasant. 

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Obviously, he has a bad habit of flirting with others and getting handsy and honestly that’s not going away. He is the literally embodiment of lust, so there’s no changing how flirty he can be. In fact, the only way a realistic relationship between you would work is if it’s an open relationship, or you have an incredibly high sex drive and a lot of stamina. If neither of those suit you, then it might just not work out in the end. 

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

His looks are basically his entire life. He prides himself on looking absolutely perfect, so he spends a lot of time dedicated to his beauty routines. After all, he is said to be the most gorgeous demon in all of the Devildom. 

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Honestly, not really. Yes, he loves you, but he could live without you. After all, he has plenty others at his beck and call, so he honestly wouldn’t mind that much if you left him. At most, he’d feel sad for a few days, but he’d bounce back pretty quickly compared to the others. 

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

I headcanon him to be genderfluid. And no, not because he’s the feminine one of the brothers. It honestly has to do with his powers. Y’all know how Loki in the original myths was genderfluid and would often shapeshift in order to seduce people? Well, I imagine he would do something similar. Cause, as we know, not everyone likes men. So he’d shapeshift in order to seduce someone. Plus, I could also just see him not really caring about pronouns.  

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He cannot stand someone who tries to change him. Yes, he understands that his lust can cause problems. No, he cannot change that about himself, even if he wanted to. And if someone tries to force him to stop, it’s an instant deal breaker for him. 

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

It’s no secret that he likes to sleep naked, but it goes a bit deeper than that. He loves skin-to-skin contact because it makes him feel warm. Not warm as in literally (although it does that too) but it just makes him feel nice. It reminds him of the inner warmth he felt as an angel all those years ago, and he just wants to have that same warmth back. 

Note: this one kinda makes it sound like I’m trying to hate on Asmo, but I promise I’m not. I love him very much, and this was not meant to shine a bad light on him at all. I just don’t like when people do relationship headcanons like these with him and treat him as though he’d be 100% loyal all the time. Of course, he loves MC above all else besides himself but he would still flirt with and seduce other people, and I feel like people just kinda sweep that under the rug. 

[katnissmellarkkk]

Andddd here’s my chappy three thoughts 🥳🥳🥳

Hmmm Katniss saying that her mother has a dress made of velvet is actually really interesting because it shows that Mrs. Everdeen Lily-Rose really was well-er off before she married Katniss’ father Hunter.

Or did she get the velvet dress from Maysilee? Oh well, who knows.

Aww, Katniss’ nervous habit of touching soft things repeatedly to soothe herself 🤧🤧.

“Crying is not an option. There will be more cameras at the train station.” — someone tell that to Peeta 🤣🤣🤣.

Okay I gotta stop picking on Primmers, I know but like. How small is she that she sits on Katniss’ lap like a toddler but then in the following year is the same height as her? Doesn’t matter I know but still I wonder.

Okay so Mrs. E is the doctor for the people of the Seam? Idk I never thought about this but who does people like Peeta or Madge or Delly go to if they’re sick or hurt? Is there a still running apothecary shop that Katniss never mentions? Are her grandparents still running the family biz?

Also okay, I gotta stop having so many thoughts on all the lil details I know but like. Katniss says here she’s familiar with the herbs her mother doesn’t grow on her own so like a). Katniss is more of a healer than she leads on because no average person knows what kind of plant is medicinal and b). Her mother is just growing herbs and Katniss never mentions it again in the whole series? Or I just missed it.

Okay imma move on from this one singular paragraph but Gale and her made a pact a year ago that they’ll supply each other’s family with game if they were to be reaped... I’m feeling like their close friendship is probably only one year old then? Idk. Just my interpretation.

Honestly I love Katniss getting mad at her mom here.

She’s sixteen, for God’s sake, of course she’s angry at what her mother’s illness put her through.

Also I lowkey like that her mother got mad back because that lady in the movies had zero personality.

“Boys who are two to three times my size.” She sounds so little, omg 🥺🥺🥺.

“I don’t care if we’re rich, I just really want you to come home” 🤧🤧🤧😩😩😩😩 okay Primmers, you got me here.

“the Peacekeeper is at the door, signaling our time is up, and we're all hugging one another so hard it hurts and all I'm saying is ‘I love you. I love you both.’ And they're saying it back...” this is so sad leave me be 😫😫😫😫

Katniss is burying her face in a pillow to block out her emotions this is too much for me 🥵🥵🥵

Omg I forgot Peeta’s father visits Katniss 😅

Why does he visit Katniss?

She describes Peeta’s father as a “big, broad-shouldered man.” And then describes Peeta as stocky. Idk the comparison of the two descriptions has always led me to think Peeta is gonna be a big dude when he grows up like his father. This made no sense and had zero correlation but I thought, so I said it, no regrets

Oh he brought her cookies 🤧

WAIT WAIT WAIT. I just had a new thought, y’all. What if instead of the baker bringing cookies being a thing he does for all tributes, what if he’s bringing the cookies because Peeta asked him to, because he made them and wants to give them to Katniss and knows she’ll never accept / trust them coming from her competition? What if that’s the real reason the baker visited her in the first place? Because Peeta asked him to? This was such a shipper comment but idc, no regrets, remember?

Omg Peeta’s father is just mute 🤣🤣🤣

Between an abusive, angry mother and a mute for a father, the Mellark brothers must have had a fairytale of a childhood 😅😅😅😅.

But seriously #PoorPeetaMyBaby

Aww Peeta’s father is gonna help keep Prim alive 😭

Omg I just remembered he’s her mother’s ex boyfriend. Haidon Mellark, as I named him in my fics.

That one fic where he was thought to be Prim’s real father is just playing now in my head, rent free.

But does Katniss not realize that he may be offering to help Prim as a favor to her? Like she claims Prim is just so wonderful people adore her but there’s like zero evidence in the text that make her endearing? Okay I need to turn this bus around, I need to find a love for Primmy Deen.

Madge is not one for preamble apparently. No “hi, how are you? I’m sorry you’re gonna die? What will your last meal be?” Just right to “here, wear this family heirloom of mine, k thanks.”

I like that Madge had to kiss her cheek for Katniss to realize they were friends 😅😅😅.

I remember always loving her and Gale’s hug here. I’ve always felt like it was platonic, but especially when I first read the books and had zero preference one way or another for Gale or Peeta, I really liked how she said even with nothing romantic between them, “when he opens his arms, I don’t hesitate to go to him” or something I’m paraphrasing ok I’m lazy

Also though, this is the first time they’ve ever hugged? Idk why that surprises me? It shouldn’t because where is a hug gonna fit into a hunting trip 😅🤣😂 “I just caught a deer!” “let’s celebrate with a hug!”

I like that Katniss remembers how her father even failed to make a good bow sometimes. Random, I know.

I like that the Capitol weren’t entertained by the people freezing to deaths because it wasn’t bloody enough 🤭🙃

“How different can it be [to kill a human vs an animal]?” She’s about to find out, Gale 🥺. And when she comes back you won’t understand 🙄😔

What did Gale want to say before the Peacekeepers dragged him away?

I used to think it was a confession of love but I’m actually sure it wasn’t now? Just the wording “remember I-“ doesn’t sound like it, considering he never confessed anything prior to her coming home.

I’m assuming now he was just gonna give her some more advice to stay alive 🤷🏼‍♀️. Clearly if it were relevant it would have made its way to the others books.

Aww, she’s never been inside a car before 😭😭. I didn’t even know they had cars in this universe but okay.

I notice though how she says “In the Seam, we travel on foot.” So is Peeta just riding his trolly down the street every day with the other merchants then? 🤣

Peeta just openly crying on camera 😅😢.

I like how Katniss is like “ooo is this an act to get sponsors?” when in reality Peeta’s like “no, I’m just a soft and genuine boy ™️”

Omg I just realized this totally goes along with Peeta’s thing later on “I want to die as myself”

He’s refusing to hold back his emotions because he thinks he’s doomed to die and he’s already refusing to pretend to be or feel something ingenious.

But a Johanna mention in book 1 chapter 3 woohoo 🥳🥳🥳 also Katniss comparing Jo and Peeta is kind of like foreshadowing of their shared torture in book 3.

Omg she just called Peeta broad-shouldered and strong. 🥰🥰🥰 my headcanon for his post-canon body is confirmed

Also why does Katniss keep allotting his strength to carrying bread trays around? Are they heavy? Why have I never once heard of people who carry bread trays being strong? I always thought Peeta was really strong because he learned to fight in order to defend himself against his mother but that’s probably wrong.

But if a mother is abusive, it can lead to one of the kids being physically violent as well and we know Peeta isn’t but he has two older brothers I’m gonna cut myself off now but I think we all smelled what I just stepped in.

Also I just find it so fascinating now how she regards herself vs Peeta here.

When talking about herself, she says, “The competition will be far beyond my abilities. [...] Oh, there'll be people like me, too. People to weed out before the real fun begins.” But when she talks about Peeta, she immediately says, “It would take an awful lot of weeping to convince anyone to overlook him.”

It’s just funny how she discounted herself right from the start but thought he was a real contender and then come to find out, Peeta believes it’s the exact opposite 😂🙃. They’re both so stupid I can’t even take it.

Wait did they actually give the location of the Capitol and the location of District Twelve in today’s world? And I just overlooked it? Brb I’m gonna go to google maps right quick.

Okay so basically what I gathered is the Capitol is probably in New Mexico and District Twelve is somewhere between Kentucky and Alabama. Irrelevant I know. But just a reminder now to everyone that Katniss and Peeta are literally speaking, crying and screaming in thick, backwoods southern accents.

It’s literally so sad how everything for Katniss is about food. Like every motive she has, every action she does is about preventing starvation ever again. 🤧🤧🤧

First mockingjay mention 🤭🤭.

“My father was particularly fond of mockingjays” 😭😭😭 I bet he was 😭😭😭😭

We always go on and on about how Katniss is a mockingjay or her children are mockingjays but Katniss herself here says mockingjays represent her father imma cry, y’all 😫😫😫😫

“It’s like having a piece of my father with me, protecting me” shut up shut up shut up shut up

Awww, Katniss has never had food like this before 😔😔😔

Neither has Peeta 🤧🤧

Katniss disliking the way Effie put the two kids from the year before down and so began to eat like a pig just to prove her point, is so her. And the beginning of her fighting for the underdog.

Omg the Rue introduction 🥺🥺🥺

Bahahahaha the commenters calling District Twelve backwards but charming 😅😅😅 they really are the hillbilly district

Peeta’s unexpected laugh 🥺🥺🥺 I love you, baby

“He was drunk. He’s drunk every year.” “Every day.” Katniss and Peeta are already finishing each other’s sentiments and teaming up to get on Effie’s nerves I love them so much 😍

Oh my God, Effie, you selfish jerk. They’re kids having fun for like one second, no need to throw in their faces they’re gonna die if the drunk won’t help them. I’d forgotten why I don’t really like the book version of her. I actually prefer her as comedic relief in the movies.

I actually just realized I really dislike Effie Trinket, I hope they never speak to her again Post-Mockingjay. Idc how you’re raised you don’t need to treat teenagers who are sentenced to a probable death badly just because they laughed at you 🙄🙄🙄😡😡😡😡. They didn’t even really laugh at her, she’s just annoying and awful, we don’t stan Effie in this household.

Okay, that’s all for my thoughts on chapter three! Until next time, y’all ! If anyone actually read this long mess of a post.

[attemptinghaikyuu]

Fake Dating: Bokuto

A/n: I’m really in a bokuto mood lately, he’s just so good.... help ;-; I can’t escape my love for him (let’s take a moment to appreciate how cute he is in this gif)

G/n reader

Bokuto Koutaro

Akaashi’s your best friend

And when Akaashi joins the volleyball team at Fukurodani and meets Bokuto, you meet him too!!

The three of you become a trio of pure chaos

It barely took a week of knowing Bokuto before you were doing everything together

Like seriously, he’s automatically integrated into your life

He’s really easy to talk to and Akaashi opened up to him, even though he usually has a hard time making new friends

So there was no reason for him to not become one of your closest friends, within 24 hours of meeting

You would think Akaashi could keep the two of you from anything too crazy, but Bokuto has really good arguments for things

Akaashi ends up so curious about the stuff, that he can’t not let you test the durability of a volleyball

You end up a champion debater, even if it’s only over questionable and stupid things

Pep👏talks👏

Bokuto is such a good friend, if you’re nervous over a school project or anxious to talk to someone, he is pumping you up to do it

You know how Akaashi gets Bokuto out of his emo moods?? Well you can do it too (maybe better than Akaashi), and Bokuto can get you out of any of your own emo moments

He’ll do anything to make you feel better, and if you’re just too sad to be cheered up, Bokuto’s staying with you for as long as you need him🥺

If you need something from him and he can give it, he will (he’s perfect)

That’s why he agrees to pretend date you, when you explain how you need to prove a point to Akaashi

You ended up in an argument with your best friend about how he could literally date anyone in the school and we’re asking why he wasn’t

And Akaashi just straight up deadpanned “Y/n, I’m not getting in a relationship that’s doomed to ruin a friendship or end in failure.”

And you’re like, ummmmm?? No?! Don’t think that a relationship just ruins everything???

Basically, you refuse to let your friend believe that dating breaks bonds, instead of strengthening them

And Bokuto agrees that Akaashi has a poor opinion on it

Dating each other is the best way to show Akaashi that it can be good!

Announcing to Akaashi that you were dating was simple, and he seemed to believe it!! :D (he’s very suspicious)

He’s pointing out your lack of involvement in your new found relationship, within the first week

You’re getting fed up over Akaashi’s doubts fast, so you pull Bokuto towards you and kiss his cheek

Akaashi lifts his eyebrow and shrugs his shoulders

You’re glaring very intensely, trying to communicate through the cheek kiss, that you’re bond with Bokuto is growing

Like, f*ck🤬😡 you Akaashi, this is true freaking love!

You don’t notice the growing blush on Bokuto’s face, and before you can, he’s picking you up and heading towards volleyball practice, shouting “Hey, hey, hey!”

It becomes a habit after awhile, Bokuto leans over for you and he usually picks you up once you plant the kiss on his cheek, it’s definitely not to hide his blush or anything...

Word gets out around school that y’all are dating, and now Akaashi might find out it was a lie if you’re not acting like a couple all the time

So now you’ve taken it upon yourself to go all out

Going to parks and little cafes, taking pictures to show Akaashi and just having a ton of fun

Half the time you’re forgetting to get any pictures at all, you’re too caught up in laughing

The amount of inside jokes the two of you now have is incredibly concerning

Please... the team just wants to know why turtles wearing sunglasses are so funny... why can’t you just explain the joke....

After a few months you’re forgetting this was just to prove a point, until you see a kid from your science class asking Bokuto, if he wants to go on a date

You don’t wait to hear the answer, you’re running away from the feelings that bloomed without you realizing

Or maybe just refused to acknowledge

It hurts that he’ll probably say yes, I mean the person was really cute and you’re just pretending to date him

You run straight into Akaashi and you can’t help it, you burst into tears and tell him you’re sorry about lying and that Bokuto and you are just friends because he doesn’t like you like that

He’s trying to calm you down before he pauses and gently turns you around

Standing in front of you is a very concerned and on the verge of tears himself, Bokuto

You remind yourself to breath before looking away, did he hear what you said? You’d basically admitted to liking Bokuto, there was no way you wanted to get in the way of him being able to go on a date with the person who’d just asked him out

You don’t notice the tinge of red on his face or Akaashi slipping away to give his friends space, as you awkwardly laugh “Bokuto, umm, I’m happy for you.. and your, uh, date.”

“Are you talking about yourself??”

You look up, startled and confused, shaking your head

Understanding flickers to his face and before you can say anything, you’re in Bokuto’s arms

You slowly reciprocate the hug, melting into the warmth of his hold, only freezing when you hear a mumbled “I like you.”

You don’t say anything for a long time, Bokuto pulls away and looks at you trying to get an answer from your unreadable expression

Before he can, you’re giving his cheek a quick kiss, looking away with a smile and bright red face

He smiles right back, and as you grab his hand, heading toward Bokuto’s volleyball practice, you laugh

“Ya know, we’re almost as cool as the turtles with sunglasses.”

[cruelfeline]

Anyone who hangs about Twitter potentially saw an unfortunate Hordak take cross their timelines today. 

As is custom on this blog, I’ll be taking it apart for my own personal amusement (and for the amusement of any of y’all who like to watch me do so). I doubt the poster will see this, as they’re on Twitter and not apparently on here, but in case they do: this is for my own enjoyment and the enjoyment of followers; it absolutely does not need to be responded to if that’s not your cup of tea. 

So, that little disclaimer in place, let’s see what we can make of this! Because this is on Medium, I’ll be using screenshots as quotes; just a heads-up.

So... this first bit isn’t really anything Hordak-related. It’s more... fandom drama, I suppose? Not really something I can pick apart. I can, however, give my own personal opinion on this sort of thing, for what it’s worth.

It’s true that people can and should be able to feel whichever way they wish about a character. And to talk about that character. 

However: it is also true that people who dislike Hordak can be very unpleasant in making that known to those of us who enjoy him. Including descending into personal insults for no discernible reason. Add to that the fact that his character means a great deal to some fans for intensely personal reasons, and it is not difficult to see why some fans aren’t keen to see anti-Hordak content on their timelines, in their mentions, etc.

Censoring character hate isn’t a requirement, but in some circumstances, it can simply be a polite thing to do. It doesn’t take great effort, and it prevents people from experiencing just another bit of unpleasantness on their social media. And if you don’t want to do it? Well, that’s your right; but don’t be shocked when people voice their displeasure by replying to your words. Because that is their right.

And that’s all I really have to say about that. 

Odd way to phrase things, really. These aren’t “reasons to forgive.” The first two scenes involve Catra’s asphyxiations and are things that would need to be forgiven, not things to forgive.

Though, y’know, I really only apply that to the first scene, where he assaults her without her necessarily doing anything wrong. Mind you, I believe he does it out of a combination of needing to maintain a hierarchy for safety purposes (this is a man who needs people to be afraid of him to maintain his own safety) and poor leadership skills mimicked from a narcissist, but it’s still a terrible thing.

However! The second time? After he asks her about Shadow Weaver? This isn’t torture-fun-times. This is Hordak neutralizing a threat to the entire Horde. Because that is what Catra is in this moment: a threat to the security and wellbeing of him and the entirety of the Fright Zone. She lies about a critical mistake. She proves herself to not only have poor judgment in serious matters, but to be very willing to lie about it in order to guard her own selfish motives. While I can’t condone the method Hordak uses, I do wish people would stop using this second instance of punishment as some sort of proof-of-torture. He does not do this for no reason. He does it because Catra released a dangerous prisoner into the wild and lied about it. And his concerns over it ultimately prove correct.

This entire qualification doesn’t have much to do with whether he deserves forgiveness or not, but it’s a point I want to make because it combats this idea that Hordak did this to an innocent girl “for no reason” or “just to be cruel.” That’s simply not the case; no matter how unpleasant the method, Hordak is a military leader punishing a subordinate for seriously endangering him and everyone else in the organization. Badly. I don’t know what the equivalent would be in modern military, but Catra’s error is massive. It doesn’t make what Hordak does right, but it does give a reason other than a simple “he’s a bad, bad man.” So.

Adding this scene is... actually kind of odd because he doesn’t really do anything to Adora here. And also: this scene is... what’s the word... meaningful-in-hindsight, so to speak. Essentially: in this scene, Adora is claiming that Hordak is responsible for stealing her, for robbing her of a peaceful life with her family. And Hordak is claiming that he neither knows nor cares who she is, and that she does not matter to him. 

The interesting aspect of this scene, and something that OP fails to acknowledge at all, is that both Adora and Hordak are wrong.

let’s see if I can talk about this without crying... nope, already starting to tear up

Hordak never stole Adora; Light Hope did. Hordak did not orchestrate this unfortunate life for her. Rather, Hordak, a lost clone dealing with his own insecurities and fears and problems, found an equally lost infant in a field and gave her the only home he really knew how to create (and one that, for its flaws, was still better than the absolute nightmare he was “raised” in). In all likelihood, given Light Hope’s lack of understanding of infants, he probably saved Adora’s life by doing this: without him, she may well have perished alone in that field.

Hordak likewise does remember her, eventually. And she is not inconsequential to him: by saving her, he ends up saving himself, and all of his brothers. By forging this near-unknown bond with her all those years ago, by choosing to take in an infant rather than letting her die, he plays a key role in deciding the fate of the universe. 

This scene that OP sarcastically claims is a reason Hordak shouldn’t be forgiven has a sibling:

The fact that OP apparently fails to recognize this and realize that these are the only two moments in the series during which Adora and Hordak directly interact, that they’re a pair, means that OP misses the connection between the two and the significance of how they misjudge one another initially. It indicates a lack of understanding of the themes of the show: themes centered around connections with other people, love, and forgiveness. Which, given the contents of this essay, is unsurprising.

Moving on!

Y’know, whether or not one believes, in terms of definition, that Hordak is a colonizer (I personally don’t for pedantic and clone-cult reasons, but that’s not really relevant to this post), it’s interesting that OP notes how Stevenson confirms that he is... but conveniently leaves out the part where she confirms that he did it because he was brainwashed.

That’s... an important piece of information to leave out when discussing whether Hordak should be forgiven or not. A very important piece.

And it doesn’t really matter whether he’s a colonizer or a conqueror; the reason it comes up is because people seem very stuck in the mindset of “if it’s a colonizer, it must die” without acknowledging any sort of nuance. There’s also the question of whether what Hordak did actually caused the same sort of upheaval and lasting damage we see resulting from legitimate colonization, and all of the implications of that, but this isn’t really the place to go into that. Honestly, I don’t really think SPoP as a whole is the place to go into that.

No. Hordak is not the person who taught her all of these things. 

Shadow Weaver is.

Hordak did not personally teach her that Princesses are evil. He did not teach her that wanton cruelty is fine in getting one’s own way. He did not feed her propaganda. 

Actually, as an aside: can we even confirm that Catra ever thought that Princesses where evil? I mean... she works with Scorpia, and she has no apparent morals to speak of. She does as she wishes for her own personal gain, not because she displays any sense of “fighting the evil Princesses.” And in terms of disposing of Entrapta because she was “manipulated” into viewing Princesses as evil: Catra disposes of everyone. She manipulates and uses everyone. That is one of the key aspects of her arc: she uses and abuses people for personal gain. She does this whether they are Princesses or not: just see Lonnie, Rogelio, and Kyle. Add to this the fact that Catra, from the first season, knows that she and Adora have been lied to, manipulated, and that the Horde is in fact evil, and... this entire line of reasoning falls apart. 

None of this is an attempt to “absolve Hordak of blame.” Hordak just... legitimately had no hand in raising any of the children. That was not his role (and while I know that this was confirmed by Stevenson at some point, I don’t have memory of where; potentially the last podcast?). And Catra did not operate on any sort of propaganda that she actually believed in: she simply used and disposed of people as she saw fit because she cared more about her own rise to power than she did about those around her. This was one of her major character flaws, and really? Trying to pin this on Hordak, or even fully pin it on Shadow Weaver? It absolves Catra of the blame, of the intentional bad choices she made (as emphasized by Adora) and thus weakens her entire arc.

All in all: Hordak may have created a poor environment for the raising of children, but of note is the fact that only Catra turns out this way. The other kids, whatever their problems, are not in the habit of manipulating friends, lying to them, using them, and then tossing them aside. That is a Catra Problem. Part of this can be attributed to Shadow Weaver (who only treated Catra in the poorest way), and part of it is just... Catra being not-the-best.

All right. Now we get to the really disingenuous portion of the essay.

First, as just stated: Hordak is not Catra’s abuser. Shadow Weaver is. Hordak had no hand in raising her. Hordak did not direct Shadow Weaver to abuse her. Hordak did not personally feed Catra anti-Princess propaganda, and even if he had, we know by the first season that Catra sees through whatever propaganda she was exposed to and has no actual moral objections to Princesses. But that’s not the main aspect of this portion that irks me. 

The main aspect that irks me is that this is not the scene Hordak stans mark as abusive. And I cannot imagine that OP does not know this.

But let’s talk about this scene, for a moment, before getting to the actual, legitimate abuse.

OP talks about his scene almost flippantly: “Hordak finds out Catra lied about Entrapta, he becomes angry and attacks her with a clear plan to kill her.”

Yes. Yes, he "becomes angry.” He becomes angry and attacks because as far as he knows, Catra killed Entrapta. This isn’t some annoyed “you lied to me!” moment. He legitimately thinks Entrapta is dead because Catra sent her to Beast Island. OP just blissfully glosses over the fact that Hordak is attacking Catra in rage and grief because Catra, as far as either of them know, killed his only friend and then lied about it for approximately a year. Like... how do you gloss over that in discussing this scene? How do you gloss over the enormity of what Catra did, and the unimaginable pain Hordak experiences when finding out?

So. The writeup of this scene is poor. It misses all of the emotion, all of the reality of what Catra did and what Hordak felt. But! That’s not even the unfortunate part of this portion. Let’s get to the real disingenuity.

This is the abusive scene. This is that stomach-turning moment when Catra removes a disabled man’s ability to move with dignity and without pain solely to force him to escalate a war for her own personal benefit.

Hordak is not a danger to her here. Hordak has not been a danger to her for a while because he has been holed up in his private quarters, trying to deal with the emotional fallout of Entrapta supposedly betraying him. He wants nothing to do with Catra. He wants to lick his wounds and gather himself and somehow heal from this deep personal pain that’s been inflicted upon him.

And that’s a problem for Catra because it stands in the way of her using the war as a way to best Adora.

So Catra identifies Hordak’s physical weakness and exploits it for the purpose of spiting her ex.

The fact that OP completely fails to acknowledge any of this is... well. Disingenuous. Absolutely so.

The next portion of the essay talks about people feeling that Catra was too easily forgiven and isn’t really Hordak-centric; I won’t really go into it here. Moving forward:

Ah, one of the most annoying questions I see asked. Let’s, again, acknowledge and move past the fact that Hordak was not actually Catra’s abuser...

When, pray tell, was Hordak supposed to show this remorse? When? While he was serving on Prime’s ship, trying to forget the pain of losing Entrapta, of failing to prove himself, of losing everything? Should he have done it while screaming in agony in the purification pool? Should he have done so while alone on Prime’s ship, trying to serve quietly while piecing together his memories?

Not only was Hordak simply not in a position, narratively, to go into a whole remorse bit, but he had other problems. Like, life-endangering problems. 

The appropriate time to go into his feelings on Etheria and the Princesses and All of That would have been after Prime’s defeat, upon Hordak’s re-introduction to Etheria... but then the show ended. So.

Agh, vulgar. Taking a brainwashed, conditioned slave and bastardizing his triumph at finally seeing himself as a real person, instead claiming that his intent was to glorify his own misdeeds. No. Just... no.

Again: this is not the time for guilt. And it is a demonstration of why guilt and remorse were not front-and-center in Hordak’s arc during season five: his arc was about finally realizing that he was his own person, a person worthy of identity and love and care and freedom. And this arc culminated in him separating himself from his abuser and declaring his personhood. 

That is what this scene is: not Hordak reveling in his makeshift empire, or in the terrible deeds he’d committed, but in declaring himself his own person. 

I should hope that he is proud of doing that. I’m proud of him for doing that daunting feat, of defeating his abuser and defying his god and recognizing that he is worthy of more than what Prime thought of him. And I recognize Entrapta’s role in it: not as the sole inspiration for his change, but as someone who showed him a foundation of love and acceptance, someone who introduced him to the idea that he was worthy of care and happiness and affection simply because he was a living being, no strings attached.

Trying to shoehorn in some sort of claim that this is about pride in his misdeeds, rather than joy at finally accepting his own sense of self is a massive misinterpretation of this scene, a misunderstanding of Entrapta’s role in Hordak’s arc, and... can I say it’s disingenuous again? Because I’m going to: it’s disingenuous.

All right; we’re at the end. And while the first sentence here is something I absolutely agree with - the decision to forgive Hordak is personal and subjective both for viewers and for in-show characters - the whole conclusion falls apart from there.

It highlights another glaring omission from OP’s arguments: the fact that Hordak is a brainwashed clone slave.

Hordak did not choose to “spend his life trying to prove his worth to Horde Prime.” He did not choose the method of said proving: that Prime would look kindly upon conquering rather than some other task. And he did not choose to have certain concepts and ideas (all beings must suffer to become pure; all creatures, no matter how small, have a place in service of Horde Prime; failure is when something ceases to serve a purpose) conditioned into him.

Hordak was manufactured as a cultist slave. He was “born” with hardware implanted into his body against his will to better control him. He was indoctrinated and brainwashed to the point that he believed that Horde Prime was his literal god - and in a way, Prime was, because he could mentally invade and possess and physically control the clones whenever he wished. 

Hordak was not allowed to have a sense of self. He was not allowed to have a name. He was not allowed to express emotions. He was not allowed to live without that life serving to glorify Horde Prime. Hordak was so absolutely sick with this mentality that he saw himself as a failure due to physical disability and assumed it was his responsibility to fix that. 

The idea that Hordak simply chose to do what he did, that he had the same foundational morality and mindset as any “normal” person might, shows a glaring lack of understanding even the basics of his narrative. 

Yes: Hordak did bad things. But he did them for legitimately tragic, nigh-horrifying reasons that this essay just ignores for the sake of... I don’t know? Trying to justify OP’s distaste for the character? I am uncertain. But it’s a mark of a poor essay, of a poor understanding of the character, and is honestly just disappointing to read when the show itself tries so hard to drive home its wonderful, hopeful themes through Hordak’s story.

Whether one forgives Hordak or not is one’s personal choice, but I certainly hope one makes said choice with better insight into his character than this essay provides.

[tchallasbabymama]

all of your love

Hey y’all! Here’s Chapter 4 of my Playlist series. Make sure you catch up on the series (and check out my other stuff) by checking out my masterlist HERE. 

Let me know what y’all think!

This one is nasty (18+ as always), enjoy!

Word count: 6,195

T’Challa woke up Tuesday morning eager as a kid on Christmas. Every second that went by brought him closer to Ashanti and he couldn’t wait any longer, his excited nerves building to critical mass within him. Natasha and Wanda had noticed his constant texting and smiling at his beads, and worked hard the entire time he was there to get the truth out of him about who he was talking to. They tried asking Okoye, but she was a steel trap so the two of them cornered him in the living room just before his departure. Their suspicions were confirmed when he proudly pulled up a picture of her to show them.

“Damn she fine, who is that?” Sam sauntered into the room as T’Challa quickly shut the projection down and cleared his throat.

“She is none of your concern.”

“His girlfriend,” Natasha said at the same time before smirking into her cup of coffee. T’Challa looked at her in disbelief and she shrugged back at him in response. “Oh please, he would’ve found out eventually.”

The king rolled his eyes and left the room in a huff to go pack his things.

“He’s so pissy today,” Natasha said, a smirk still firmly planted on her face.

“He misses her, it’s adorable,” Wanda responded.

“Shit, I would too. Y’all saw her.”

T’Challa swept back in the room, bags in hand, calling to Okoye on his beads.

“General, are you ready to go?”

“Ewe kumkani wam, be down in a moment.”

Cap rounded the corner and picked up on T’Challa’s anxious energy. He turned to look at the other faces and a smile crept up his before he turned to his friend.

“Ready to get back to Ashanti, huh?”

A chorus of “Ashanti?!” broke out.

“Why’d he get to know her name and we didn't?” Wanda asked incredulously.

“I was getting there but the bird interrupted,” T’Challa said with a shrug, referring to Sam who rolled his eyes and waved goodbye to the king before leaving the room. 

“Hey, uh, can I talk to you for a second before you go?”

“Of course Steve, what is it?”

The two of them ducked off into the hallway for privacy.

“How is he?” Steve asked of his friend.

“He is responding to treatment really well, you should come see him sometime. Shuri has removed most of the words, and living with the Border tribe seems to be good for his mental state.”

Steve smiled from ear to ear. Hearing about Bucky’s progress warmed his heart and he seriously considered hopping on the jet with T’Challa right then and there.

“How about next week sometime? I have some things I need to finish up here, but I’d love to come see him. And see Wakanda properly this time.”

The two heroes shook hands and returned to the living room. At that moment Vision floated up through the floor and Okoye rounded the corner.

“I will never get used to that.”

“My apologies, general.”

“Apology accepted. My king?”

“Yes, we should get going. I will see you all again, hopefully not too soon.”

They said their goodbyes as the two Wakandans made their way to the Royal Talon Fighter to head home. Once Okoye had them in the air, T’Challa retired to one of the jet’s two bedrooms to change into sweatpants and a t-shirt and take a nap on the plush Wakandan mattress he missed so much. He was out like a light.

“My king, we are home,” Okoye lightly shook T’Challa awake. He got up and changed back into his clothes before exiting the ship. The entire royal family was there to greet him, much to his surprise. He greeted his mother and sister before landing on his cousin. 

“Umzala, I thought you were heading to Oakland,” he said as they dapped each other up.

“I’m about to head out now, just figured I’d wait a few and say hey to my favorite cousin.”

“You said I was your favorite cousin!” Shuri butted in.

“Hush, Dr. Frankenstein,” N’Jadaka remarked back at her. Shuri was shocked, but her face quickly morphed into amusement as a laugh erupted from her lips.

“If I’m Dr Frankenstein you just called yourself the monster,” Shuri cackled as she walked away, most likely going back to her lab to tinker with the laws of physics or something simple like that. 

“Welcome home son,” Ramonda lightly pushed her nephew aside. “How are the Avengers?”

T’Challa rolled his eyes at their incompetence and inability to work as a fluid team.

“Inept, mama. The captain might be visiting soon though,” he said with an eyebrow raise, knowing his mother had a little crush on Captain America.

“Oh, will he? I’ll have to be sure to spend some one on one time with the captain while he’s here.”

“Ew, Auntie.”

“Mama, please stop.”

“What? I still got it!” Ramonda turned and walked back towards the palace.

The cousins just looked at eachother and shuddered before N’Jadaka took off in the same jet T’Challa just arrived on. 

The next morning, T’Challa woke up later than most days. When he returns from a mission he likes to keep his workload light the following day, so he caught up on more of the sleep he had been missing out on. The very first thing he did after waking up was send Ashanti a “good morning beautiful” text, and before his feet even hit the floor she had responded.

Ashanti: Good morning handsome. How did you sleep?

T: Much better in my own bed, but still not as good as when you were in my arms.

A: Don’t make me blush.

T: But it’s so cute when you do.

T’Challa dragged himself out of bed and straight to his shower, turning on the hot water and turning his jungle bathroom into a sauna. 

“Kim, shuffle between my recently played songs.” He called out to the AI housed in his beads and around his quarters.

“Now playing ‘all of your love’ by Luke James,” the smooth automated voice rang out. A smile spread across his face as he remembered his picnic with Ashanti by the lake. They tapped beads and made a joint playlist, this album being one of Ashanti’s favorites. He had listened to it multiple times while he was away, missing her with every note.

You got the kinda loving 

That'll break a motherfucker's knees, baby

Got me begging, got me craving

I just wanna get a squeeze, baby

Don't leave me 'lone

Leave me 'lone, leave me 'lone

Leave me 'lone, leave me 'lone right here

I want it all

Want it all, want it all

Want it all, want it all, my dear

All of your love

(Give it all to me baby, yeah)

All of your love, yeah

(It's for me it's for you, baby)

All of your love

(I need it)

Give me all of your love (ooh)

He stepped under the faux rainfall and let it wash over his body, lathering up with some mango scented black soap. After his perfectly sculpted body was clean he turned off the water and air dried while covering his smooth brown skin in cocoa butter.

The king was looking forward to his day for two reasons: he would get to spend time with his little sister during the day and then Ashanti at night. For his first major stop of the day, he and Shuri went to the mines to check on the progress of the latest excavation efforts. The mining tribe elder K’Hari was intent on setting T’Challa up with his daughter Tamala, so they quickly made their escape to Shuri’s lab where they spent the rest of the day playfully bickering over who makes better gadgets while testing out some of Shuri’s latest inventions. T’Challa knew he would not win the argument, but enjoyed annoying his little sister. 

Around lunchtime T’Challa made his way back to the palace to eat with Ramonda in her garden. She wasted no time cutting to the chase.

“So this Ashanti, you have feelings for her?”

T’Challa nearly choked on his water, not expecting to cross into that territory so soon. 

“Uh, yes, umama, I do. It is still early though, the other night was only our first da-” he stopped when he saw the incredulous look on her face. She sucked her teeth at him.

“You brought a girl to the palace after one date? Do you make a habit of this?”

“No mama, I promise. The last time was when you caught me a few years back. With Ashanti it just...felt right.”

“Hmm...Lets hope it is. Bringing girls in the palace you barely know, I may not have been there your whole life, but I definitely raised you better than that...I can see she is different though, not like the riff raff you usually sniff around. That last girl you dated was horrid-”

T’Challa listened as Ramonda read his love life for filth, and all he could do was sit there.

“-skirts up to her ass, heels way too high for the setting. Thank Bast you’ve found someone good. Good for you, and good for Wakanda.”

“Woah, mama, we have only had one date and you are talking about Wakanda already? I do not even know if she would want to be queen one day.”

“No, but you want her to. I can see it in your eyes when you look at her. Yes, it’s early but you’re in love, unyana wam. The other day, watching the two of you, I could see how...easy you were with each other. I miss that easiness I had with your father…” T’Challa grabbed her hand as her eyes got misty. Ramonda blinked the tears away and turned the conversation back to T’Challa and Ashanti. “Everyone can see it, and I bet she’s walking around just as googly-eyed as you are.”

______

Ashanti and Kwame walked through the market arm-in-arm, picking up ingredients as they went.

“So tell me about this mining tribe hottie,” Ashanti spoke after a comfortable silence.

“Sis, I have one word for you: biceps. He could benchpress me and I just- woo that’s hot as fuck.” Kwame said, picking up a fan from a vendor and fanning himself dramatically before paying the old lady who ran the store.

“You really just bought a fan to be dramatic?”

“It’s practical and a prop!”

The two roommates broke out into giggles.

“Anyways, his name is Omar. Here’s his picture, isn't he cute? Ugh those dimples, I could swim in them.”

Ashanti flipped through a couple pictures of the two of them before Kwame shut the hologram down.

“You’re scrolling too much, you might see things you can't unsee.”

“Good looking out, friend.”

“So what are you serving kumkani other than that pussy?” Kwame asked loudly.

“Will you keep your voice down?! I’m not trying to announce this to the world.” Ashanti whisper-yelled at him before he threw his hands up in surrender. 

“My bad, my bad. Hey did you close the shop today or did you finally hire someone?”

“No, not yet. I haven’t even really been looking, I should get on that. But, uh, yeah I closed early. I'm there 7 days a week, the people can handle me being out for a few hours,” Ashanti said, Kwame nodding along in agreement. “Hey, want to stop by my parents’ place for lunch?”

“Girl when have I ever said no to food?” Kwame responded with excitement. He never said no to food. 

“Should we bring something back for B?”

“No she’s probably going to stay a couple nights with Kiki. You know, so they can ‘catch up’ or whatever. Honestly, its like she forgets i can see right through her.” Kwame rolled his eyes.

“Even I can see they have feelings for eachother-”

“Girl blind people see they have feelings for each other. It’s her first experience with a girl so I don’t want to push her but damnit just do gay shit already sis!” 

They arrived at Zana Cafe right as Ashanti’s riotous laughter subsided. 

“Hey babygirl, hey Kwame! Where’s my other daughter?” Chidi asked, hugging them both.

The three of them sat at a table near the kitchen and away from the hustle and bustle.

“She’s out ignoring her feelings for Kiki.”

“Kiki Odunsi? She’s a nice girl, Binta has good taste.”

“That’s what I said, Baba, but she’s just too nervous to act on it. Yet she pushes me into the king’s arms-”

“I’m sure I don't want to hear the rest of that statement, but your mom will be back soon and I’m sure she’d love to hear all about it. You kids want some food? We got some curry that just finished, you have perfect timing.”

“We felt it in our souls,” Kwame half-joked. Chidi disappeared into the kitchen and reappeared with their food, letting them dig in while he ran the restaurant. 

About halfway through lunch Kwame got a message from Omar that made his entire face turn red as his lip disappeared under his top teeth.

“Go ahead,” Ashanti said, already knowing the content of the message without having to see it. He either sent a nasty picture or a dirty text, and either way she knew the second Kwame saw it he was mentally already sucking Omar’s dick. 

He got up, giving her a quick peck on the cheek and waving goodbye to Chidi as he all but ran to his dick appointment.

“Well he sure got out of here in a hurry,” Chidi came over and sat across from his daughter. 

“A boy texted him.”

“Should’ve known,” he said before clearing his throat. “So, the king...how is that going?”

“You actually want to talk about it?”

“Of course, you’re my daughter. It’s just hard to see you as an adult sometimes, but I’m getting better at it.”

“Well he and I really connect on a lot of levels. He’s so smart, and sweet, and considerate and I know we only had that one date but I feel like I’ve known him for years. We have another date tonight, I’m making him mama’s pirri pirri chicken.”

Chidi sat back in amazement. Here was his little girl...in love...with the king of Wakanda. 

“You know, that’s what your mother made the first time she cooked for me.”

“It is?!”

“Mhm, that’s how she hooked me. Been trapped ever since.”

Ashanti playfully hit her father’s arm and thought about her meal plan for later.

“Well, Baba, I have to go prep for tonight. Give Mama my love when she gets back.” Ashanti kissed her father on the cheek and headed back to her empty home.

______

Her “Sacral Chakra” playlist blasted through the house as she danced in her underwear to Missy Elliott’s “Throw it Back” while stirring the rice one last time. Everything was ready, and she still had plenty of time before he was supposed to show up. She put the oven on “warm” and stuffed the dishes inside before removing the rice from the heat and trotting upstairs to get herself ready for the life changing dick-down she was surely about to receive.

She changed the music to fit the mood she wanted to set, switching to her “Sexy” playlist and swooning at the sound of one of her favorite songs tickling her ears. 

Like a flame to a moth 

I'm addicted to your sauce, so bad

I want it 24/7, 365, 911

I need it fast

Don't leave me 'lone (so)

Leave me 'lone, leave me 'lone (so fast)

Leave me 'lone, leave me 'lone right here

(911 terrible baby, yeah)

I want it all

Want it all, want it all

Want it all, want it all, my dear

All of your love

(Give it all to me, baby)

All of your love, yes

(It's for me it's for you, baby)

All of your love

('Cause I need it)

Give me all of your love (ooh)

Luke’s voice carried her as she took a dip in the tub with a colorful jasmine and ylang ylang bath bomb before moisturizing with rose-infused shea butter. Her skin smelled like a forbidden garden, just the way she liked it. Then she trimmed her pubic hair, cleaning up her bikini line and giving him a clear, well-groomed path to her treasure trove. Finally, she painted her nails and toes white to stand out against her skin and avoid clashing with her colorful, off the shoulder, bodycon ankara dress. Ashanti chose to keep her braids down and makeup light again, knowing all that extra makeup would get ruined anyway. For a final touch she slid on her strappy gold stilettos, knowing just how much he loved them from their kimoyo chats. 

The doorbell rang and Ashanti took a deep breath before straightening her dress and heading to the door. When she opened it both of their jaws dropped. There he was in an all-black suit with a black shirt underneath, a purple pocket square, and that damn hoop in his ear. He looked like the black panther he was and Ashanti wanted nothing more than to be his prey.

His eyes roamed her body and landed back on her face before he stepped over the threshold and pulled her in for a deep, passionate kiss. Their tongues danced alongside each other as both of their hands reacquainted themselves with the other’s body. T’Challa’s hand steadily sliding down her backside brought her out of her daze and she broke the kiss. He frowned as though she had taken away his favorite toy.

“Dinner, your highness.” She said before giving him one last peck and escaping to the kitchen with him on her heels. As she tried to maneuver around the kitchen, T’Challa refused to let go of her waist, whispering sweet nothings in her ear every few seconds about how much he missed her.

“T’Challa, go sit down, I’ll bring you your food,” She giggled as he kissed her cheek repeatedly. “Go!”

He let her go with a slap on the ass and sat down at the table, watching her float around the kitchen. After a couple minutes, Ashanti set two plates full of delicious looking food down on the table. She cracked open a bottle of palm wine and poured them both a generous amount. 

“Are you trying to get me drunk Miss Mostafa?”

“Maybe. Cheers.” Their glasses clinked together and they both took a sip without breaking eye contact.

“Tell me what you think,” Ashanti pointed at his plate to get him to focus. The king took one bite and his eyes rolled back in his head.

“You made this?!”

“Ha ha, T’Challa. Yes, I made this. It’s my umama’s recipe though. And make sure you save room for dessert” she said while digging into her food. 

“My compliments to the chef,” he said as he seductively brought his lips around his forkful of food, still staring into her soul.

The two of them caught up on their time apart, what little they didn’t already discuss in their kimoyo chats. T’Challa regaled her with stories of his work with the Avengers, and he watched her in admiration as she spoke about the happenings at Taj’s.

“Ready for our next course?” Ashanti asked the king.

“I am.”

Ashanti scooped the warm mango cobbler into two bowls and topped each one with ice cream. She set T’Challa’s bowl down in front of him and went to take her seat when his hand wrapped around her wrist and tugged her back towards him. 

“Sit on my lap,” he said in a low grumble.

Ashanti’s feet carried her back to the king and she turned to sit across his lap.

“Not like that, face me.”

“My dress-”

“I don’t care.”

A chill went down her spine as she hiked her dress up over her thick thighs and straddled him. He reached for his bowl and scooped up some cobbler and ice cream, bringing it to her lips.

“Open.”

Her lips parted and she tasted her sugary concoction, happy it turned out how she wanted it to.

“Is it good?”

“Yes.”

“Is it sweet?” He asked, nuzzling into her neck and inhaling her scent.

“Y-yes.”

“Good. Feed it to me.”

They took turns feeding eachother the cobbler, licking the melted ice cream from each other's lips. With each bite, the king’s hand travelled further and further up Ashanti’s thigh, gripping her tight and causing her to let out the tiniest whimpers. 

He could smell her arousal and it drove him crazy. When his hands travelled up to her hips and felt no underwear she looked at him and winked, flipping the switch within him. His eyes turned almost completely black as his fingers trailed across her body directly to her clit. Ashanti jumped, but his other arm held her down. His fingers circled her clit, making more wetness drip out of her. She suckled on his bottom lip and moved her hips to get him to stop teasing her, but he wasn’t a fan of her defiance.

“Did I say move?”

His voice sent a chill down Ashanti’s spine and straight to her pussy. Another rush of liquid escaped her and T’Challa chuckled darkly.

“You like when I tell you what to do, don't you?” He asked, one hand still teasing her clit while the other gripped her jaw forcing her to look into his eyes. She nodded desperately and he laughed in her face. “I know you do, kitten. You know what I want you to do for me?”

She struggled to compose herself, his teasing becoming too much for her to handle.

“What? I’ll do anything”

“I know you will. Cum on my fingers when I fucking say so, do you understand me?” She nodded as his fingers moved down to her now dripping hole, three of them opening her up and sliding in deep while the heel of his hand pushed into her clit. He slapped her ass with his free hand. “I said, do you understand me?”

“Y-yes.”

He curled his fingers inside her, alternating between quick and slow thrusts, all while dragging the pads of his fingers across her g-spot. More wetness pooled between her legs as he dug in her, causing her to grind into his hand for even more friction.

“There you go, nasty girl. Work for it, mhm…” He licked from her collarbone to her ear before nibbling on her lobe, making her release a moan from deep within her core. “You sound so beautiful, I’m going to make you sound like this all night. Are you ready for me?”

She held on tight to his shoulders and rocked into him more, the tension building in her body.

“Yes, kumkani.”

He growled and pulled his fingers from her, placing his hands under her thighs and picking her up while she whined at the empty feeling.

“Where’s your room?” He spoke into her ear as she wound her hips against his and sucked on his neck. She pointed up the stairs, but her lack of communication frustrated him more. He needed to be inside her now.

He backed her into an empty wall and pushed his pelvis into hers. Her eyes rolled back at the feel of his third leg against her pussy.

“You want it?” He teased. She nodded vigorously as he unzipped his pants and pushed them to his feet. “Do something about it.”

She reached between them and almost cried at the feeling of his hot, pulsating dick in her hands. She couldn’t close her small hands around it, and she wondered briefly about how it would fit in her mouth. She felt the throbbing veins up and down his shaft and his length would surely fill her to the brim. She swiped her thumb over the precum oozing out the head of his dick and brought it to her lips to taste. The sweet saltiness of him set her off, and she lifted her body up before sliding down on his length.

She was too eager to be bothered by the stretch of her pussy, just wanting him inside her.

He moaned into her ear and gripped her ass tight as she enveloped him in her warmth. He wanted to keep his composure, but it slipped more with every bounce of her juicy ass onto his pelvis. The thickness of his dick pulling her clit combined with the edging from earlier had her on the verge of an orgasm already.

 After letting her get used to his size, the king decided to stop playing nice and pushed her back into the wall, staring deep into her eyes as he thrust into her body. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she held on for dear life as he busted her wide open.

“Oooh, T’Challa!”

“Hm? You like when I do that? What about this?” He lifted her and brought her down onto him, the force causing her to yell out his name between thrusts.

“T-Chal-la, oh-my-Bast-it-feels-so-good. Mmm I’m cumming, I’m cumming!” She barely rushed out before her muscles tightened and released around him, both of them moaning out in pleasure. He continued to hold her while they stared into each other’s eyes forehead to forehead, breathing heavily, until she broke the silence.

“Can I taste you?” she whispered and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He placed her down and she immediately sank to her knees, licking her essence off of his dick.

His hand went to the back of her head as she sucked the tip and rotated her two hands along his shaft. After a few moments she grew brave and pushed him further into her throat, making his toes curl. She was down to one hand and decided to go even deeper. Resting her jaw, she brought her free hand to stroke his shaft while alternating between licking his balls and softly bringing them into her mouth. Her lips made their way back to his pulsating dick, his chorus of “fuck yes, just like that” and “suck that dick” lost on her ears while she focused all her will power on swallowing the monster before her. Her mouth slowly crept over his tip and down his shaft as far down as she went before. She swallowed and took him in deeper, nose almost touching his pubic hair.

“Fuck!”

He wasn’t expecting that and came down her throat. She gladly swallowed every drop.

“Good girl, make sure you clean your plate for your king.” He pulled her up by her jaw and kissed her deeply, his tongue exploring her mouth to taste himself on her. He slapped both her ass cheeks.

“Get in that bedroom.”

She grabbed his hand and led him to her room, her dress at her waist and those damn heels on her feet. Ashanti had a feeling those would be staying on most of the night. 

When she opened her door, he only looked around briefly before grabbing her by her throat and licking her neck. Her pussy throbbed once more.

“Why do you like when I’m rough with you?” He growled in her ear as he unzipped her dress. “Answer me.”

“My king, I-I don’t know but it turns me on.”

“You don’t know, huh? That’s not a good enough answer. Bend over, grab your ankles. Let’s see if you can figure it out” His hand pushed on her back, making her bend at the waist before he slammed into her, taking everything she had to give. His hips slowed down and stirred inside her, making her release a long, deep moan each time he pushed deeper.

Tears came to her eyes from how he was hitting it. She had never felt anything so deep or so thick inside her, and the way he was moving made her cry out to the heavens.

“Bast!”

“She’s not here love, you’re at my mercy,” He chuckled and grabbed her neck, pulling her up to whisper in her ear as his hips sped back up and she grabbed onto the back of his head for stability. His left hand had a tight grip on her hip, but his right hand came up to tweak her nipples as he slowed his strokes back down, circling his hips. 

“Yes, kumkani” she moaned out on repeat like a broken record. He had hit that spot in her that shut her brain down, making her putty in his hands.

“I’m going to ask you again sithandwa, why do you like it when I’m rough with you? Hmm? I know it’s hard to think right now, but try for your kumkani. We talked about it before. Why do you want me to treat you this way?”

“B-because I’m my kumkani’s little slut.”

He smiled as wide as the cheshire cat and stilled inside her, another deep chuckle rumbling from his chest.

“That’s my good girl, my little slut. You like being kumkani’s little slut?”

“Mmm, yes. Please, make me your slut kumkani. I’ll be good.”

He pulled out and slapped her ass.

“Prove it. Good girls ride dick.” He laid back on the bed, hands behind his head as he watched her stand over him and squat onto his throbbing member. He moaned as she dropped her weight on him and picked it back up repeatedly, tightening her kegel muscles on the way back up each time. She eventually dropped down to her knees to give her thighs a break and leaned back towards his legs, giving him a full view of her body as he watched himself go in and out of her.

“Shit, Ashanti.”

She slowed down and sat up, circling her hips and gripping him tight before leaning over and letting him suck on her nipples. She let him have his fill then whispered in his ear, “Am I a good girl yet?”

His mouth left her breasts and he pulled her into a deep kiss, their tongues fighting for dominance with his eventually winning again. He pulled back to take in her beautiful face that was twisted in pleasure, his black eyes staring deep into her brown ones.

“The best.”

The king wrapped his arms around Ashanti’s waist and spread his legs before thrusting up into her, catching her off guard. Her body succumbed to his and another wave of intense pleasure washed over her as she came once more. He fucked her all the way through her orgasm, refusing to let up.

“Do you have one more in you kitten? Can you be a good girl and cum again for your kumkani?”

“T’Challa, I-”

“Who?!” he hooked his arms under her knees and flipped them over, driving his big dick deep into her guts with a roll of his hips.

Tears came to her eyes and he wiped them away, pausing his movements. “Are you ok, love? Did I hurt you?”

“No, I...it just feels so good. You feel so good inside me, baby.”

“Do I?” he teased as he thrust impossibly deeper inside her, watching as the tears sprang from her eyes, kissing them away.

“Yessss,” she hissed as their foreheads came together so they could stare deep into each other’s souls as their climaxes approached. 

He pushed her legs back further and she felt him drop all his weight into her pussy over and over and over and she left her body, tears running from her eyes and juices seeping from her pussy. Her head rolled back and a faint smile appeared on her face as he fucked her stupid. Her nails dug into his back as his hips continued to thrust into her from above and he left his signature on her neck. He felt her body tensing up again and  he decided to stop delaying his release before he killed the poor girl. 

“Kitten.” He said to her in a soft, sweet voice, slowing down his strokes and just grinding in her deep. She struggled to focus on him but when their eyes met, he leaned in for a soft kiss. “You’ve been such a good girl for me. You take me so well baby, it’s like your pussy was made for me. You said I could cum inside you, will you still let your kumkani cum deep inside that pussy?” They had already discussed this, knowing it would come up at some point. Luckily they both had their STI prevention shots and  they were both on birth control, so since they shared the same kink they decided to go for it.

“Yesss, please kumkani. Cum inside me,” Ashanti said as she locked her legs around his waist.

The king’s thrusts picked up the pace, elevating them both to their highs. The tension rose in their bodies, Ashanti scrambling to hold him closer, and T’Challa struggling to contain his strength so as not to cause real damage. When the dams broke, their bodies shook violently and he filled her up while she spilled all over him. He slowly thrusted into her as his dick continued to pump her pussy full of him. His thrusts slowed to a stop as she came down from her climax. He leaned back and opened his mouth and let a glob of spit fall onto her clit before lightly rubbing it in with his thumb.

“T’Challaaaaa!” she whined, feeling overwhelmed. He smirked and stopped, leaning down to plant a kiss on her forehead then her nose, then her lips. 

“I know, baby, I’m sorry,” he said as he continued to lightly kiss around her face and neck. Her legs still hadn't let him go, so his hips churned inside her very slowly, grinding just enough to keep her turned on but not enough to over stimulate her. “You just can’t let me go, huh?”

“Uh-uh,” she pulled him to her soft lips, only allowing them to slightly graze each other. “You feel too good.” She whined.

“Oh I do? You love when I’m deep in that pussy, don't you? You want me in there all the time? Want me to slut you out whenever I fucking feel like it?”

“Mmmm, yes kumkani.”

“Good girl. Now let me go baby, I’m not done with you.”

“T’Cha-” She was cut off by a deadly glare. “Kumkani, my pussy is tired.”

“I know kitten, this will help her feel better.”

Ashanti slowly unraveled her legs and moaned as his dick slowly left her, pulling on her clit and her g-spot on the way out. The emptiness she felt was soon replaced by the feeling of his copious amounts of cum dripping from her hole. 

T’Challa moaned at the sight then leaned in for a taste, causing Ashanti to gasp unexpectedly. His tongue moved up and down her pussy, collecting his cum and spreading it all over. He sucked on her clit and his fingers slowly found their way inside her to rub on her spot before his finger and tongue switched. He tongue fucked her walls while his thumb strummed her clit lazily, her legs twitching on every upstroke . His moans of pleasure pushed her further to her climax and when he started slurping his cum out of her pussy she lost it, body convulsing and cumming all over his chin. He slurped up their combined fluids and brought his lips to hers, transferring their cum to her mouth for her to taste. She swallowed and stared into his eyes, bottom lip between her teeth. He rolled over beside her and they faced each other. 

“Don’t look at me like that. You already won't be walking tomorrow, but I can make it a week,” T’Challa warned and the two broke out into laughter.

“Wow, just...that was...wow,” Ashanti said, still processing what just happened.

“Is something wrong? Was I too rou-” Ashanti shut him up with a kiss.

“It was amazing. And oh my Bast, you are nasty as fuck.”

T’Challa chuckled, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her into his chest.

“That’s just the tip of the iceberg, dear.”

Ashanti stilled then looked up at him in fear and arousal, both of which were made worse by the bloodthirsty look on his face. 

“What else are you into?”

The two lovers laid there and talked for hours, only pausing for a brief moment while Ashanti went to the bathroom. They talked about their kinks and exploring more together. They spoke about their futures, their bucket lists, their families, and more. The conversation veered from comical to serious to heart wrenching to seductive all within the span of a few hours.

They eventually fell asleep with T’Challa’s strong arms wrapped around Ashanti’s waist, just like the last time they slept in each other’s arms and hopefully just like all the times they’ll lay together in the future. 

Our love

Your love

On me

Our love

My love

In you

Our love

Your love

On me

Our love

My love

Ooh!

(Did you ever think that, maybe

Maybe it's destiny?

Maybe it's destiny that brought us together)

Next Chapter

[fandomsilhouette]

we’ll have (a devil of a time)

Felix throws a wrench in Lila’s meticulous planning when he refuses to be wooed by grandiose tales of adventure and daring, when he refuses to give away any hint of what she might lie about to get his attention. Somehow, this leads to Marinette shaking hands with all the wrong (right) people. 

Happy @felixmonth, y’all! 

This new kid, this Felix, is never going to fit in. Everyone can see it the moment he steps through the door on that first day, black suit and scowl in tow, and slouches into the seat at the back of the class next to Chloe, prim and proper, glowering all the while. He catches Lila’s eye immediately, with his tangible air of wealth and power, the sheer amount of usefulness he seems to hold in his brooding body. 

Of course, her interest lasts exactly as long as it takes for Felix to make it very clear that he has absolutely no interest in her, no matter how much she lies or cajoles him into joining the rest of the class. 

“Hey, Felix!” She starts by sidling up to him, turns on the charm she thinks she has. She’s got him pegged, she’s sure of it: a pretty boy like that, all dark and mysterious, has got to want space to be sensitive and vulnerable. He longs to be their friend, and Lila knows it. All she has to do is give him a chance. 

Then he immediately declines her exclusive invite to the Winter Social After-Party (hosted by her, of course), leaving the split halves of her invitation to flutter pathetically to the ground.

“I prefer to spend my time with people of consequence, thanks.”

Just like that, Lila is left scrambling to piece together the torn shreds of her plan. Alright, then. If he won’t be friends with her, he won’t be friends with anyone. 

She lets her gaggle of admirers reassure her over and over that “He was so mean to you, Lila! How could he say such a thing?”, that of course she doesn’t have to associate with a bully (no matter how sweet and generous and self-sacrificing she is, oh!), Lila makes it her business to meticulously bar Felix from each and every social circle she can manage. 

Irritatingly, this suits Felix just fine. He sits at the back of the class every day next to Chloe, making it seem like the back was something to choose instead of somewhere that the lowest echelons of the class, the dregs of society, were banished to. 

Marinette has gotten used to watching the back. She could be exiled at any moment, after all. So she’s seen the way Chloe doesn’t cling to Felix and heard the way Lila and Alya whisper snide comments from their seats next to her just quietly enough that she can’t hear without asking, watched them stiffen and shush on the occasion Felix walks by their table. A slight nervous fidget. A muttered “speak of the devil.” 

Marinette knows that associating with Felix is a social death sentence. She also knows that he makes Lila uncomfortable, off balance. Most of all, she knows that her own social life is hanging by a thread. Marinette is done waiting for someone else to cut the string and send her crashing. Her life is not meant to be waiting for someone else’s choices. 

She finds him at lunch at the backmost table by the trash cans, the table of outcasts and degenerates, lounging in the shade of a tree. Sunlight filters through the leaves, casting him a mottled medley of light and darkness until a cloud passes overhead and sends his features into shadow. He picks at his plate, a vulture seeking a soft patch of flesh.

“Hey.” 

He looks up, but not directly at her. He doesn’t respond. The fork hangs suspended a little above the plate.

“I’m Marinette. You’re Felix, right? I know Lila’s turned the class against you, and that’s pretty rough. I’ve been there. I’m actually still kind of there. I know you already have Chloe, I’d like to be your friend too.” She sits opposite him and begins eating with an air of determined purpose. He waits a long moment. 

“I don’t need friends.” He spits at last. 

Marinette pauses between bites. “Let me be clear. I’m not giving you a choice about this. Call it a partnership if you want, a merger of interests, whatever. Lila is going to wreck you and you could do worse than to have someone who knows exactly what her game is working with you.”

“...I see. And what exactly do you know?” He goes back to eating, unconvinced and dripping with condescension. 

“You know Lila is lying, obviously. Do you know why?” 

“I know very well why.” He says, a sharp edge of arrogance entering into his voice “She makes people like her to get what she wants. I’ve known people like her.”

“And what does she want from you?”

“I’m rich.” 

“You’re cold. You’re standoffish and mean and an absolute prick. You’re an easy target to make her look good. She’s going to be out here doing her best to be your friend,” and she spits that word like a curse too, “and you’re going to ‘bully’ her, turn down her made up offers and snub her parties, and she’ll say it’s because you think you’re too good to hang out with them but of course she doesn’t think that! She wants to see the best in you! Until the rest of the class hates you, thinks you're the worst person on the planet for daring to breathe the same air as them.” 

He goes silent then, fork still frozen in the air as his knuckles grow bone-white on the gleaming metal. After a long moment, he adds “What do I care? This nobody school doesn’t matter to me, and neither does anyone in it...” He hesitates, glancing at the seat next to him, then returns with renewed vitriol. “What value does this have to me?”

Marinette scoffs. “You of all people should know better than that. We’re insanely well connected, didn’t you know? Rose is friends with Prince Ali. Juleka is in Kitty Section, which has been aired on TV. Adrien is… Adrien, and you already know Chloe. Alya runs the most popular superhero blog in Paris. And as much as I hate to brag, I’ve won competitions for Gabriel Agreste, I’ve worked with Jagged Stone and Clara Nightingale, I’m the costumer for Kitty Section, I’ve been on TV, and you’d better well take me seriously! You think these people won’t figure out who you care about and leave it in ruins for you to cry in the ashes of?! Just because they haven’t yet doesn’t mean they never will.” She hesitates. “You don’t know them like I do. They’re insanely loyal.” 

“Not to you,” he scoffs.

“That’s the problem.” 

Silence hangs thick in the air. At long last, gives a small, conciliatory nod. “I… see. Perhaps this could be a… profitable arrangement.”

Marinette gazes sardonically at him, as he begins to flounder with his hands, reaching out for a hug and then a handshake, shimmying awkwardly in place. She waits a moment, amused, then sticks her hand out for him to shake. 

He takes it. 

“This is what you were going for, right? It’s your signature move.” Her voice shifts suddenly into something playful and light, and Felix is knocked off balance. This is… different. 

He sputters. “It seemed… appropriate for our agreement, okay!” 

“It’s called a ‘friendship’, you know.” Marinette sticks out her tongue and winks. 

Felix blushes. “I wasn’t… I didn’t… it’s an unfamiliar phrasing… for me.” 

“I’ll help you get used to it,” she promises, “That’s what friends are for!”

He chuckles a bit, an uneasy, unpracticed sound. Marinette smiles, genuinely this time, and they settle in to eat in comfortable silence.

It becomes a familiar habit, an easy routine: Marinette joins Felix for lunch, jokes around and teases him until he’s bright pink and laughing, then slips away once Chloe makes an appearance. She waits for him after class on the days Chloe rushes off early, and finds herself walking home with him, the space between them shrinking each day.

Felix finds himself having parallel conversations, one snide and one almost curious, both vulnerable and resigned to losing the only friend they have left, offering their own selves up for sacrifice as if it would hurt less if they gave it freely instead of having it torn from them. 

“Why do you even hang out with her?” Chloe and Marinette both ask him. 

“You two are a lot alike, you know. You’d never see it in her, but you’re also not looking. You should.”

That’s all he’ll say about it, and they learn not to push. 

One day, Chloe shows up early, and Marinette is left scrambling to pull the leftovers of her lunch together, clumsier in her rush than she ever is. She sits down on the bench, shoving Marinette over and announcing that she’ll be “slumming it with the commoners, actually,” and won’t be eating at her hotel anymore. Her eyes look every direction but Marinette’s.

“Alright,” Felix responds placidly. He picks up his lunch and walks around the bench, settling back in next to Marinette. “Please don’t push my friends around, Chloe.” 

“Well, I--” Chloe is taken aback, hurt. “The rule has always been that she’ll leave when I show up! I’m here now, so she can shove right out of here, thanks.” 

Marinette sputters. “We had an agreement! You get half of lunch and all of class and it’s not like that’s less time than I get, and I was about to leave anyways but now I don’t think I will. Thanks.”

“He’s my friend! You and I both know he’s only tolerating you because of who you know,” and at that Chloe glances over to the rest of the class sprawled out on the grass, giggling over Lila’s latest fantasy adventure. 

Something like hellfire burns in Marinette’s chest and she swallows it down. 

“Fine. I’ll leave.” 

Felix moves faster than anyone, standing up and gathering her lunch in his arms, tucking it gently into her bag. He swings her backpack onto his arm, which looks wildly out of place with its cheerful pink against his dour grey vest, and then gently pulls her hand into his. 

“I’ll leave with you, Marinette.” 

Chloe gapes, eyes bulging, an ugly startled expression that Felix knows she isn’t faking. 

“You’re going to choose her over me?” For once her voice is quiet. 

“...I can’t let you pull me wherever you want, Chloe. Marinette is my fr-- my friend. Just like you are.” 

“Why not?!”

Marinette lets Felix pull her up, his arm wrapping around her waist, and then pauses uncomfortably, standing where she is. 

“...look. Do you want to just come with us? Felix keeps saying we’re alike. Maybe it’s time to find out why.” 

Chloe’s face contorted into an unpleasant grimace, as if she’d just swallowed the bitterest pill in the world and, grudgingly, came out the healthier for it.

“I… what are you doing, Marinette? We don’t like each other. That’s what we do.”

“...yeah, well.” Marinette glances over at the class again. “I could use another friend. Couldn’t you?” 

Felix grins. “Or a business partner!” 

“...I could manage business partners, probably.” Chloe smirks and Marinette smiles back when Chloe reaches out to shake her hand. 

“You two are so alike! It’s so cute that you’re getting along.” Lila’s saccharine voice cuts through their tentative conversation and sends them startling. Alya’s just a few steps behind her, scurrying to follow with Lila’s bag clutched in her arms. It would be worrying how much she looks like Sabrina, if Marinette still had it in her to care. Months of passive aggressiveness and constantly being in the wrong had taken its toll on her, and she was done. Isn’t that why she had sought out Felix to begin with? 

Felix is already helping her up again, pulling her up from the bench as Chloe storms up to Lila only to brush past her, shoving her shoulder into Lila’s chest. Alya catches sight of Felix’s arm around Marinette’s waist, and calls out. 

“You’re really going to make a deal with the devil, Marinette? Is that how low you’ve sunk?” Alya’s voice is uncharacteristically malicious. “You won’t be friends with Lila, you antagonize her, bully her, and now you’re befriending her bully? This is the person you want to be? Ugh. I can’t believe I ever thought you were worth being my friend.” 

Chloe pauses, halfway between the table and the door to the classroom, and spins around on her heel, snapping into place with a confident click. The old smirk is back now, given a new purpose.

“Actually, Alya Cesaire, you aren’t worth her friendship.”

Alya is frozen in something in the middle of furious and offended and gaping, humiliation shock, and Marinette is frozen right there with her. Hesitantly, gazing at Chloe in shock, she sidles a little closer to her. Chloe is still going.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I hate this goody two shoes queen of perfection, but you? Have you forgotten when she’s done for you? After all the terrible advice you’ve given her over the last year, I’d think you’d be on your knees begging her to stay. After all, isn’t she the one who helped you get an interview with Ladybug for your blog? No one had even heard of it until then. And she was the one that helped you go on dates with Nino while she babysat. She’s the one that brings you cookies every morning and coffee when you’re tired and lets you crash at her place. You think she should be waiting for you? Darling, you’ve gone and lost what little mind you had left. You have no idea what you’re pushing away.”

Marinette can’t figure out what has possessed Chloe, to say all these words in Marinette’s defense that have been burning a hole in Marinette’s chest for so long but have never quite found their way out. She doesn’t even know how Chloe knows all this. She gapes at Chloe in newfound admiration and awe, suddenly aware of how the same venom that Chloe had always drowned Marinette in can be used to pull her back up. 

Felix is getting impatient at the door, and Marinette slips her hand around Chloe’s wrist to pull her away. Chloe doesn’t stop, just redirects her attention to Marinette, flipping her ponytail back behind her like she’s dismissing Alya and Lila. 

“What. An. Idiot. You know?” 

Marinette gapes for a moment and then bursts into giggles. “You’re right!”

“Like, I don’t like you but at least I can recognize the value you have as a friend.”

Chloe determinedly doesn’t look at Marinette as she says it, and Marinette doesn’t respond for a long moment. When she does, she squeezes her hand still wrapped around Chloe’s wrist and goes quiet, soft, fond. 

“I like you too, Chloe. I’m glad we’re going to be friends now.” 

Felix grabs Marinette’s other hand as they get to the doors. 

“Business partners, huh?” 

Both girls stick their tongues out at him. 

Alya watches them leave, her hands crumpling into angry fists. She manages two furious, determined steps after them before Lila summons her back.

“Wait.”

She’s sitting at the table now, lounging across the seat like a traitor on a newly conquered throne. Alya turns back to her. Her mouth, gaping a moment ago, has hardened into a razor-tight line. 

“Let them go. They’re not worth you, Alya. They’re being bad friends. What was that you told me about Felix? You don’t have to associate yourself with bullies, right? C’mon. Let's have lunch!” She swings her legs back over and starts making her way over to the shaded grass under the trees, settling with her feet tucked under her. Lila stretches out a hand, nails manicured and neat, and waits until Alya takes it. 

Lila pulls Alya down, and grins with all her teeth bared.

[adinosaurnamedmittens]

Alright so I can’t stop thinking of RVB Zero and how much potential it has so I wanna rework it a bit to work better.

So first I’m gonna talk about the new characters and what I’d change before breaking down the individual episodes for critique and suggested rewrites. At this point, I’ve only seen up to episode 4, Encounter. So spoilers till that ep. 

West - Honestly great! He doesn’t have a ton of character, but what he has is solid. He works very well as the gruff, no-nonsense leader who’s a tiny bit of a dad.

Raymond - Also great! He’s the most classic RVB character, as he’s an underdog who’s not the best at fighting, but has a lot of heart. My fav new character, right next to Tiny.

One - I want to change her to 2nd in command and drop the whole “can’t work within a team” thing. Keep the confidence and slight rudeness, but drop all the lines referencing anti-teamwork. It hasn’t factored into the story so far, One has been successfully working as part of the team for all the episodes. This would make her dynamic with Axel more interesting, being in a higher position of power. Especially considering how her healthy relationship with her dad contrasts with East and West’s relationship. This would reinforce the tension with East, since One now has an actual position of power over her. Also, she should have the exact same powers as Zero, but maybe less powerful. This would help foreshadow that reveal, and help us understand how the enhancements work. While One is a bit of a shit, and thinks she knows best, she’s willing to take the fall when her ideas fail or get them in trouble.

Axel - Imma be honest: totally forgot he was One’s adopted dad until I rewatched the episodes prepping for this. You could drop it totally, as it gets a bit redundant with West and East’s relationship, but I think there’s more fun in working with it. Also, if One’s 2nd in command and Axel isn’t insecure about it at all? Instantly makes him a more likable guy. I also think he parallels to Wash very well (bit of a kid at heart, weapons guy, team dad, emotional heart) so we’re gonna expand on that too.

East - Her and One’s relationship is the driving force of conflict within the strike team. With the changes made to One, East can stay pretty much unchanged. Before they were too similar. Now, with One being abrasive but willing to work together, and East being more reserved and distant, they’re great foils for each other. Also she parallels early Carolina, which I love (speed is her ability, prefers working alone, competitive as hell, dad runs team)

Villains: On characterization, they’re all good! Villains are allowed to be a bit more shallow, and they all seem to have understandable motives for what they’re doing: Zero wants revenge and power, Phase wants revenge especially against West, and Diesel just seems like he’s having fun. I do want to change Zero’s power tho, with Phase already having a teleport with a cool gimmick, and Diesel having a strength/tank ability, Zero should have a unique ability. Maybe gravity because of the sword? It would allow him some cool movement tricks while still being visually distinct from Diesel and Phase’s abilities. Or something inspired by his “ghost” line from Duo.

EP 1: Viper

The Good: The introduction to the villains and their abilities was amazing. I love Phase’s knife and it’s honestly one of the coolest things I’ve seen in the show. And the intro to the Strike team? Hilarious. Great character work. You can tell that One and Axel are close, that Raymond is hesitant and new, East and One have a very competitive relationship, and West is the tough love dad.

The Bad: Don’t violate the 180 camera rule. The intro fight scene was cool, but the camera moved way too much and made it hard to keep track of everything happening. And with the new, shiny art style we need a bit more time to absorb what’s happening since the detail level went up. Also y’all healed Wash’s brain damage with a throwaway line, and then immediately fridged him? Not cool. I mean, if you wanted to show how tough the villains are, you already had them beat up Carolina.

Story Changes: - Zero gets name dropped this ep so we get a scene next ep where Axel recognizes his name. - Either replace Wash with a high ranking soldier and completely scrub him from the episode, or give a different reason why he can’t help, maybe exactly Carolina’s reason of “you’re recovering”. I’m not committing to totally removing Wash bc in Recovery Carolina’s line of “That I-that we thought was a medium risk asset” hints that Wash knew exactly what they were carrying and I’m excited to see where they take that. - Mainly I want scenes of Wash talking to Axel and expanding on his characterization as they are both Nice Boys Who Have Been Through It. - I also think a scene after we meet Strike where Axel asks Raymond “You like riding with East?” and Ray goes “You two stuck me with her on purpose!” and One goes “Yup!” all cheerfully. Just reinforce those team dynamics and friendships before it goes to shit!

EP 2: Recovery

The Good: The garage scene was perfect. Tiny is amazing, love her so much! And Axel got such great characterization during this ep. What a dork. West and Raymond also work super well together, their interactions are great.

The Bad:You know it’s a problem when the villains have a better dynamic than the heroes. The scene where Carolina explains all the strike member’s abilities and personalities? Bad. Also a little OOC for her. And redundant, since we also get Raymond asking West about East, and Axel’s explanation of the girls to Carolina.

Story Changes: - Have Axel, the emotional heart, waiting outside the recovery room for Carolina. Honestly, this isn’t that big, but I think it’d suit his character. - Carolina’s exposition is changed to solely history and abilities, no commenting on their personalities. Maybe East gets a little “has shown difficulty in working with others” but that’s it. The physical acting for these scenes really shines through, so let it stand alone. Even watching without sound, you can pick up that West is a no-nonsense leader, that Axel isn’t a flashy fighter but gets the job done, that East is fairly young and doesn’t take fighting seriously, and that One is willing to leave others behind if she thinks she can do it better. - For Carolina’s convo with One this ep about her “not willing to work on a team” either swap One with East or change it to “you need to listen to your team more. Don’t assume that you immediately now what’s best” - At the end of training, when Axel says “the guards were priority #1″ One should say “I knew you could handle it.” and Axel could respond with “Well, it’d be nice if you let me know that.” to show that One can work well as 2nd in command, but needs to communicate and stop assuming things. -Also should change Axel’s warning line about her enhancements to “Don’t push yourself. Remember what happened last time?” to enforce that this is a habit, and that while he cares about her, he’s not trying to boss her around as much. -Don’t reveal that East is West’s daughter until Raymond and West talk. That way, there’s a bit more emotional weight, and Ray’s line of “I was digging through the team files” makes more sense if Carolina doesn’t drop that info in the previous scene. - When Axel talks about the experiments East went through, he should mention that he was there for some of them. Dropping more foreshadowing for the Axel/Zero reveal! - Carolina drops Zero’s name in their convo, and we get a shot of Axel’s hand tightening on his weapon, showing the audience that the name means something to him, but we don’t know why.

EP 3: Duo

The Good: First 3rd of the ep? Really good. I love One being rude to Carolina, and then gaining a grudging respect. West and Raymond are, again, the best dynamic. How? I honestly have no idea. The car looks so stupid in the funniest way, I hate it but I love it. Also god yes Axel and Zero’s relationship is so wholesome and could be the best thing in this season. One’s warning call to the facility? The funniest shit. And Zero’s dialogue is hella cliched, but it works bc he’s obv such a dramatic bitch.

The Bad: HOLY HELL THE DIALOGUE. First, One and East’s fight? garbage. Very forced. Super hard to believe these two are real people. Carolina and West literally repeat the exact same line, less than 5 seconds apart. The dishwasher joke West makes does NOT at all work, it’s too tonally dissonant.

Story Changes: - Obv. need to change One and East’s convo. End it with “Without your power, you wouldn’t even be on this team!” East should storm off or almost attack One, requiring Axel to diffuse. - It’d also be really nice to get a line where One acknowledges that she went too far with that, but puts off apologizing to East. It’d be a nod that she’s good at reflecting and assessing, but too proud to actually take her words back. - I’d like to make Raymond more panicked when they find Wash. It’d help sell that he’s in bad shape and add more weight to “He’s got a heartbeat!” - Maybe re-work Phase and Zero’s conversation a bit. The dialogue is definitely not this season’s strong suit. - Pull Carolina’s “I’m just trying to help, East.” since it’s more impactful for East to storm off immediately and West says the line a couple seconds later. And change East’s dialogue to “You may be my CO, but don’t try to be my dad. Not after what you’ve done.” Or something similar. - For the dishwasher gag in the meeting, either pull it or double down. It’d work so much better if someone asks “Are you serious about this? Aren’t there more important things to discuss?” and West just deadpans. “This is of the upmost importance. If we can’t keep this base clean, how can we be expected to do anything else?!” and then Carolina clears her throat super loud and West goes “...Right. Rookie? Take it from here.” - Rework the “Carolina stay behind” dialogue. Even just a “Carolina. You’re still recovering. If you get hurt again, it’ll just be longer till you can take these bastards down. Keep an eye on Wash, will you?” I just couldn’t get behind the wording of “we need you here. With wash” It sounds like every cliched “woman must stay behind while the manly men save everyone!” Might be personal preference but just ew. - Add a scene where One notices Axel being a bit off (bc he’s worried about Zero being a part of the bad guy team) and she asks if he’s okay. He brushes her off, says its nothing. She goes “alright, i trust you.” - Maybe make the flashback a bit more apparent? There was a moment in the middle where I questioned whether or not it was a flashback. Again, could be a me problem.

EP 4: Encounter

The Good: The fight scenes continue to be absolute standouts. The varied environments, the movement, the dynamics on point. Wish we could’ve saw a bit more from Axel, but as is the scene worked well. The framing of the ep was good too, cutting between the mission and the fallout. And Ray, resident coward, immediately squaring up without a thought after West got injured? *chef’s kiss*. THAT is good character development. THAT is an amazing way to establish their relationship without telling us outright. Go feral, my boy! And Tiny and Raymond’s convo was so cute. I love how, despite what he says, Ray is there for his team and always willing to help. Carolina and One’s convo was also pretty decent. It got a bit long and over-explainy on Carolina’s end, but there were some pretty good moments.

The Bad: The fight after the mission failure was SO over-acted. Too much motion, to many camera angles. It changed what should have been tense arguments to hilarious melodrama. This has been a consistent problem, but it REALLY affects this scene in particular. And the second Axel enters the scene it just immediately goes downhill.

Story Changes: - Add a line from West in the beginning scene like “I’ll cut them off!” to explain why he isn’t in the car too. This also means it’s not as out-of-nowhere when West shows up to trash the car. - One should call out Axel instead of East. If she’s his daughter, she should be able to tell when he’s acting off. And she would have an easier time connecting the dots between Axel and Zero. - Instead of “I trusted you.” One should say “You lied to me.” 1) He’s her dad. One lie isn’t gonna break her total trust. 2) This would imply it’s the first time he’s lied to her, adding more weight to the whole situation 3) It’s way more accusatory and less cliched (if only a bit) - Add in a “One, wait!” bc I am a sucker for it and we could hear the guilt in his voice, rather than the weird scene where the girls make him spin around by bumping into him. - It’d also be nice if Ray stayed back for a bit before leaving, so we got a bit of his feelings on the matter. I mean, obviously he cares a lot about West, but does he blame Axel for not being there to help? It’d be nice to know!

TL;DR The best parts of the episodes are the fight scenes, and when they focus on the fun team dynamics. The worst parts are dialogue (mostly the serious bits) and over-animating, as this takes away from the drama.

I don’t mind the cheesy villains, but that may not be the case for everyone.

The best part of RVB has always been the rag-tag found family dynamics. While the fight scenes are cool, they have always been supplemental to the real meat of the show. The writers are trying something new with the whole “actual family” but you have got to focus on and develop these relationships if you want fans to care.

Mostly, I see a lot of potential in these characters, but there are GLARING issues in this season that are holding them back.

[mydisasteracademia]

SFW Alphabet: Izuku Midoriya

Aaaaand here’s everyone’s favorite green bean! Look at my baby, all grown up and ready to destroy people. (wipes away tear)

(Both of y’all are around 16 here. Don’t worry, nothing horrible here! Just two dorks in love.)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He’s incredibly affectionate to you. He’s definitely more of a verbal affirmation kind of guy (and if you identify as female he’s gonna be horribly flustered if you try to hug him). He always talks to you and encourages you, and his smile is just adorable.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Your friendship likely started when he was on a trip into town and he noticed you needed some help carrying a couple of boxes. The two of you hit it off right away (especially due to the fact that you were wearing an All Might shirt). As your best friend, he’s incredibly chatty and smiley. He loves hanging out with you and just talking about things. When you first showed him your Quirk, he was so starstruck that you both spent an entire lunch just talking about it. He’s so sweet it’s hard not to get along with him.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He’s so shy with physical affection it’s hard to cuddle with him without him fainting. Usually he only cuddles with you when he’s half-asleep and unaware of what he’s doing, and only then he pulls you to his side and all but curls himself around you.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He can cook a little bit, and he can clean fairly well. At the moment, he doesn’t want to settle down. He wants to become a pro hero first. Judging by his commitment to the grind, the day he gets married and has a family may never come.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

It would kill him, but he’d set you down and gently explain why you can’t be together anymore. He would keep any and all tears at bay until he’s alone, and then he spends a night training and crying, trying to get your hurt expression out of his mind.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He’s very reluctant to commit. He’s still just a teenager, after all, and he’s got a whole career as a hero ahead of him. He doesn’t want to get married because he doesn’t want his loved ones in danger; he already keeps his mom fairly out of the loop just because he doesn’t want Shigaraki going after her.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He’s definitely a little more gentle with you in both ways. He really cares for you and doesn’t want to hurt you, especially while you’re a civilian. This can be a bit of a double-edged sword at times, but he more than makes up for it.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Having grown up with a really affectionate mom, Izuku likes hugs. He can’t help but get horribly flustered every time you hug him, but he does love them. He’s not going to initiate it, but he hugs back tight enough so that you can’t be separated. Sometimes when he’s sleepy he’ll wander around and hug you, hiding his face in your neck as he mumbles something about his mother. It’s really cute.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It would take a lot for him to realize he caught feelings for you. Like, a lot. This boy is so oblivious it’s likely he’d never actually say it. It would take you telling him for him to start thinking about it, and even then it would be a while before he admits it back.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He can get fairly jealous, but depending on who it is he’s not going to act on it. Usually it comes about that he gets insecure about your relationship and is worried that you’ll find someone better than him. If he gets a seriously bad vibe about the person you’re with, he'll go up to you and try to walk you away.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

If you kiss him right on the mouth, he’s going to pass out. If you kiss him on the cheek, he gets red as a tomato and starts stuttering. It can be irritating sometimes. He does like it, though; he’s just so shy he doesn’t initiate. Sometimes he’ll kiss your forehead absentmindedly.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He’s pretty good around little kids. He’s got a way about him that gets their attention. It’s so adorable seeing him interact with kids like Kota and Eri due to how obviously starstruck they are.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Whoa now, both of you are still first-years. I don’t imagine ever sleeping at the same place (unless he needs a place to crash at in the future). Going ahead a few years, when he’s already a pro, it’s likely he’d get up way before you, cook breakfast for you, eat, and leave -- leaving a note saying that he thanks you for your hospitality and he’s sorry to impose. What a gentleman.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Again, going into the future when he’s a pro, the only way he’s staying the night at your place is if something happens and he needs to stay. He’s incredibly apologetic as he thanks you for letting him stay. He retires to the guest bed when you retire to your room, and he’s out like a light.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He doesn’t reveal anything about OFA, of course, but sometimes he’ll give you tidbits about his life. He tends to be a bit more hesitant about his past, but he has lots of stories about the present that he likes to share.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He can be very patient, especially when it comes to his friends. It takes a fair bit to set him off. Usually it’s when he sees an injustice that his friendly smile drops and he gets serious. Or when Bakugo is being horribly rude again, though that’s more of a rarity these days.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He documents everything he can about you. Sometimes this accidentally creeps into stalking territory, but he’s usually good about realizing that and backing off. He tries to remember everything you tell him about yourself because of how close you are.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

His favorite moment? He has a lot that he considers his ‘favorites’. Picking just one, though, he fondly remembers the first time you told him you loved him -- he was in the hospital after a bad run-in with a villain, and you visited him with flowers and tears, demanding that he not be so reckless because you loved him. It really got him thinking about your relationship and kicked off his realization that he loved you back.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’s incredibly protective of those he cares about, and you are definitely not an exception. He’s so protective he would rather pull a Nana Shimura than let you get hurt because of him, so you’ll have to do a lot of scolding to get him to stay put.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts his all into stuff between you two. Gifts for every date, he remembers every anniversary (and gives you presents for that too), occasionally brings you your favorite snack whenever he sees you -- there’s a reason he jotted down everything he knows about you.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Like I said before, he’s so self-sacrificing that he would pull a Nana before ever letting you get targeted. It can be infuriating when he avoids you for a while due to this, and while he is incredibly apologetic it’s the first thing his mind goes to. His mumbling can be a bit irritating if you don’t have the patience for it. He can be a bit of a stalker towards certain people until they realize and tell him to quit. He’s so dedicated to being a hero that it’s often all he thinks about.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He can be concerned, but only when he looks at his scars. Sometimes he can be fairly self-conscious about how scarred his body is, especially when he gets depressed and anxious.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Honestly? At first, but he would push it down in time. He loves you so much that he would rather you not have to associate with him if it meant you were safe, and no matter how much that hurts, he would do it. It doesn’t mean he wouldn’t keep an eye on you from afar, but eventually he would be able to push the pain down and go about his duties.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Gets incredibly clingy when he’s half-awake. So much so that Bakugo is the only one who’s used to it the first time it happens in the dorms (and surprisingly doesn’t make a fuss). Whenever there’s a major exam, there’s at least one night where Izuku passes out on someone and will not stop clinging to them. Usually it’s Uraraka or Iida, much to the former’s excitement/embarrassment.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Nothing villainous. Nobody rude, or abusive, or manipulative. He’s had enough abuse from his peers, and now that he’s got a healthy friend group, he’s not going to tolerate that from even a s/o. Especially not anyone who’s against the hero world. As much as he has his doubts, he’s not going to go out with a villain.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Fairly regular sleeping pattern, given that he’s only a student. He goes to bed kinda late, but wakes up early to work out.

[davids-cartoon-corkboard]

Y’all know my theory at this point: when Raph was little he got separated from his family somehow and had to survive on his own for a while; the trauma from this caused him to develop DID.

It’s pretty clear Savage Raph formed specifically out of that isolation/survival trauma, but we met a third alter in “Pizza Puffs”, who I am calling “Red” for now. What’s his deal? When did he form and why?

-----

Raph: These guys are lost without me! Maybe I should help them.

Red: Make them do it themselves. It’s the only way they’ll learn.

Raph: But they’re just kids!

Red: And you can make them men!

-----

Raph: I gotta get in there!

Red: No. They’ll never learn if you always help ‘em, Raph.

Raph: But I can’t just sit here.

Red: This is for their own good.

-----

Raph: I knew you guys could do it.

Red: No you didn’t! I did!

Raph: Oh, you wanna go?

Red: Bring it.

-----

While Savage fronts when Host can’t handle being literally alone, Red spoke up in “Pizza Puffs” because Host was struggling to deal with being sort of... metaphorically alone? In that his brothers were dying a little bit and weren’t taking him or the situation seriously. Normally “it’s not good to be too dependent on others”, “kids need to grow up” and “sometimes you have to do things you don’t like” are good life lessons, but in this particular situation the life lessons should have waited until after the boys weren’t poisoned anymore. Sure, they pulled through, but Raph staying behind added an unnecessary level of risk. There’s a level of disjointedness between Raph and Red that I’m hoping will be explored and resolved in the future.

New alters form when preexisting alters are unable to handle whatever is going on in their life. What situation would Raph have been in for Red to form? When was “be independent/grow up/do something you don’t like” important? "Pizza Puffs” was the first time we’ve seen Raph do a solo mission, but it’s not the first time something like that has been mentioned.

“You went out on your own when you were [Mikey's] age.”

Thirteen is a very lonely age to be. I’m thinking events went something like this: Raph started hitting puberty at around 12/13 and Everything Was Awful. He was suddenly a lot bigger and stronger than he was used to, so he would accidentally break things around the lair more often, or get a little too rough when playing. I know we tend to poke fun at the “nobody understands me and everything sucks” mindset teens fall into, but as a mutant, Raph’s world was so, so small. Disconnected from his brothers, whose minds hadn’t hit the same milestones yet. Disconnected from his father, who would be passed out in the middle of a “Scorpion Treadmill” marathon whenever Raph needed guidance. Disconnected from April, a normal human girl who lived a normal human life he could never have.

Raph’s temper is relatively mellow now, but back then? Under those circumstances? He went too far.

And then he ran off topside, shame and nausea biting at the leftover fury in his heart.

In previous iterations, this is when he would run into a certain masked vigilante. But not in this universe. Not on this night. Casey wasn’t out pummeling pickpockets, she was training at the Foot dojo. They wouldn’t meet until “Hot Soup: The Game”, a couple of years later.

So Raph curled up on a roof somewhere with only his awful, awful thoughts for company. His little brother had been so scared of him... he couldn’t go back and face his family after what he had almost done. But he couldn’t stay up here alone either. What could he do?

Grow up.

He’s stronger now, and he has to be braver, too. He knows the way back home and there’s nothing out here that can hurt him. He can stand to be alone for a bit.

But he can’t stay here forever. He’ll have to go back home and do what he can to make things right, no matter how much it hurts.

So Red breathed in the cold night air for a while, and then retraced his steps back to the lair.

-----

But how are Raph and Casey going to properly meet? We saw her get kidnapped by that shadow thingy at the end of “Always Be Brownies”, so the resolution to that whole situation should be involved somehow.

Draxum gave Big Mama an orb covered in clawed, three-fingered hands. Then we see that Big Mama’s new assistant has such hands, as does the entity that took Meat Sweats and Casey. Clearly Big Mama is having her assistant kidnap people to fight in her “Fantabulous Battle Nexus Wizbang”. The turtles will be pulled into this because you can’t just not have your protagonists participate in the tournament arc.

We have yet to see Casey go well and truly Apeshit, because her previous fights have always had a certain level of shenanigans to them. Mikey fought her with an umbrella and a beach ball. Leo shoved a portal under her feet. She accidentally slashed up a corpse flower and fell into the goo. Her bonding moment with Splinter made her less willing to fight. The FBNW will give her the opportunity to show us what she can really do by pitting her against an opponent who is no-nonsense, one hundred percent ready to throw down.

Who could possibly be a better opponent for her than Savage Raph? (Perhaps Big Mama’s shadow captured the Sando Brothers, and they gave Big Mama information on a better fighter in exchange for their freedom?)

The two are evenly matched, of course, but the fight gets interrupted by the other turtles causing a mass breakout thanks to Leo’s emergency leader skills. Savage runs into his brothers amidst the chaos and they get Host to switch back in again. They defeat Big Mama and her shadow together and head home, yay huzzah plot concluded.

Casey, forgotten, also escapes and sneaks off to brood somewhere.

-----

A few episodes later, Red slips away to cool off for a bit (a habit that formed when he did, a way to decompress whenever they felt their temper getting the better of them) and happens to see some hockey mask-wearing lunatic picking fights with pickpockets. He hops down and holds her back, letting the would-be thieves get away with their skulls intact. “Listen, I get that you’re mad, but you can’t just go around-” And then he gets a baseball bat to the head.

"Back for round two, are you?!”

Red shakes the stars out of his eyes. That voice sounds familiar. “Hey, I don’t wanna fight you! Pops told us you left the Foot, we don’t have to be enemies anymore! Your heart’s in the right place with this whole crimefighting thing, but you’re going too far.”

Casey laughs a laugh that’s more taunt than humor. “Crimefighting? You think that’s what this is?” She gestures at the direction the thieves went with her scuffed and bloody bat. “This is training! You ran from our fight in the Nexus and I have been itching to beat you ever since. Die, coward!”

Red just barely manages to dodge the second bat swing. “What are you talking about? I never even saw you in the Nexus!”

They trade blows for a bit, Red’s attempts to calm her drowned by Casey screaming and cursing out this “lying turtle scum”. “Where is your fury? What happened to your viciousness? Why won’t you give me a real fight this time? Why are you holding back?!”

Her voice fades and all Red hears is the high shrieks and low roars of a crowd, harsh lights dulling the twin moons set in the green sky above as she lunges towards him and-

The bat hits his side with such force that the wood cracks a little, knocking the wind out out him despite his sturdy shell.

Casey stops bludgeoning him to better focus on gloating. “That move didn’t work on you last time. Did the first hit scramble your brains?”

Red kicks her feet out from under her and bolts, running back to the lair as quickly as he can manage with his head full of sights and sounds he can’t quite grab onto.

-----

Leo had stayed up to wait for his brother to return, so he grabs the first aid kit the moment Red emerges from the sewer tunnel. He starts to ask what happened as he unspools a roll of bandages, but Red asks a question instead. "What happened at the Nexus while I was... gone?"

Leo knows what he means, and the sun starts to rise as he fills in the gaps in his brother's memory.

-----

Casey’s ankle is twisted from Red's kick, so she can’t run after him for more than a few steps before falling over. Limping back home, she puts on her motivational Lou Jitsu playlist and begins to scheme.

---

For the record, I do think Raph and Casey will eventually become friends. But in the meantime... what kind of superhero doesn’t have a nemesis? :)

[slutforgoodliterature]

Draco Malfoy x Original Female Character - Devil In Me (part I)

DID SOMEBODY SAY DRACO MALFOY?!?! *cheering erupts as I arise from the grave* 

Trying something a little different with this one! should be about 3-5 parts, lots of nice smut but also a pinch of character development, a smattering of fluff, a sprinkle of angst and (shock horror) an original female character?? 

Let me know how y’all feel about this, should be fun! 

BTW IT IS SET IN THEIR FIFTH YEAR (GOF) TIME BUT IS NOT CANON OK? OK.

“Hufflepuff!” 

The shout echoes off the stone walls of the great hall and I slide off the chair, praying I didn’t leave any sweat marks behind me; it would be just my luck. Walking over to the table of cheering Hufflepuffs all wrapped up in their yellow scarves, I try not to let my prejudices get the better of me. 

But seriously, Hufflepuff is the worst house, everyone knows that. It’s for the kids who don’t belong anywhere else: the rejects. We’re basically just a band of outcasts with a reputation for being overly friendly. Maybe it is the perfect house for me. 

“Welcome to Hufflepuff! My name’s Phillip, I’m head boy. Come take a seat next to all the other first years.” A heavyset boy with an upturned nose and big eyes welcomes me warmly. I shake his pudgy hand and slide in next to an asian girl with jet black hair. She smiles awkwardly at me. 

“Hi, I’m Joe.” She says over the uproar coming come Gryffindor table; a lanky kid with fire-truck red hair slinks over to them.

“I’m Marnie. Nice to meet you.” I smile back, hoping to god I’ve just made my first friend. 

“Draco Malfoy!” The voice of the hat booms out and a pale kid with white blonde hair saunters up to the chair. He has an unmistakable air of confidence and he smirks as the hat hover above his head for a second before declaring loudly: “SLYTHERIN!” 

“God, he looks like a twat.” Joe says to me. I laugh in agreement, something about his eyes reminds me of a snake slowly constricting around its prey and watching them closely with sick fascination, waiting for them to notice that the end is nigh. 

“Too right. I tell you what, I’d rather be in Hufflepuff than in Slytherin.” We both turn up our noses at the raucous table full of green scarves and sly smiles. 

“I’m with you on that one mate, bunch of lunatics over there. No wonder they keep them in the dungeons.” I laugh loudly at Joe’s remark and the silver haired boy, Draco I think, looks up at me. Our eyes meet and my laugh dies off, quickly turning into an awkward stare down which he wins without contest. I look away quickly and study the engravings on my fork. 

“Don’t look now, but Mister Albino just caught me laughing at him.” I whisper to Joe. She very obviously whips her head up and stares back at him.

“Oh yeah. He just saw me look as well. Awkward.” She goes red and we both duck our heads down.

“That’s why I told you not to look, dumbo!” I whisper yell at her, giving her a side-eye through the curtain of my brown hair. 

“Well sorry! There’s a reason I’m in Hufflepuff, not Ravenclaw!” She whisper yells back, and we both burst into uncontrolled laughter. 

Yep, I’ve definitely made my first friend. 

++

FOUR YEARS LATER

“Ugh, you’d think they didn’t know what a shower was in Romania.” Joe turns up her nose as some exceedingly smelly Durmstrang students skulk pas.

“Is that where they’re from?” I ask absentmindedly, flicking lazily though the pages of The Quibbler. My head is resting on Joe’s back and we lounge in the sun, enjoying the final days of summery weather. Joe picks at the grass, her feet kicking in the air behind her. 

“What are you two losers doing?” A gleeful voice calls out across the grounds. Our friend Reggie makes his way over, not without gawking at some Beauxbatons girls strutting past. 

“Something that requires more than your one braincell, sorry Reg.” I quip back as he nears us. 

“Yeah, sorry mate! You don’t meet the requirements for our exclusive club.” Joe squints up at Reggie as he towers over us, which he doesn’t do often. The five-foot eight blondie with cherubic features is cute, in like a coochie-coochie-coo way. A shame, really, as Reggie has the biggest crush on Joe, who I’m pretty sure has no idea. 

“Damn, and all this time I thought you were too threatened by my knack for comedic timing to be my friends.” He pouts playfully and splays on the grass next to us. 

“I think an owl shat down your back.” Joe points out, sending Reggie into a fit; rolling all over the grass. 

“What?! Get it off me! Where??” He squeals, trying to tug his robes around to see the back. 

“There’s no owl shit, is there.” I mutter to Joe, not trying to hide my smile. 

“Of course not.” She whispers back before pointing to an unreachable spot on Reggie’s back. “Just there, Reg! You’re so close!” 

He rolls towards us with unexpected speed and begins to steamroll on top of Joe, which I guess has more to do with an excuse to be near her than any imagined owl shit. 

“And this is my cue, see you lovebirds back in the common room later.” I laugh as I heave myself off the ground, slinging my book bag over my shoulder.

“What! Where you going?” Joe looks up at me from under a writhing blonde. 

“I need to return some books to the library and give Professor McGonagall her copy of trans-fig four back. I spilt ink on mine, remember?” 

“Okay Marnie! See ya later!” Reggie has no problem waving me goodbye and pretty soon, Joe is back to laughing in fits as he continues to roll around. 

I walk back into the school and start making my way towards the library. I see a flash of silver and green disappear into an empty classroom as I turn into a deserted hallway. Draco Malfoy.

Curious, I creep quietly towards the door. As I near it, I begin to hear sniffles and shuddering breaths. Is he... crying?! 

Not wanting to intrude on an obviously private moment, I back away slowly. Before I can make it two steps, however, the door swings open and there stands an incredibly pissed Draco Malfoy. 

I freeze in my place, looking up at him startled. I didn’t mean for him to know that I knew that he was crying, but now, as he stares down at me with his cold blue eyes and permanent scowl, I know that he knows that I know that he was crying. 

Good god. 

“I’m... I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude.” I straighten up, looking up at his towering figure sincerely. 

“Eavesdropping a habit for you, is it?” He spits at me. 

“No, it isn’t. I heard crying and just wanted to make sure that whoever it was was ok.” I explain, holding my hands out in a pacifying way. 

“You’re a stupid little busy body, go stick you nose elsewhere.” His anger only rises as I stand my ground. 

“Well that was unnecessarily rude, wasn’t it?” I raise an eyebrow at him, crossing my arms. He looks taken aback. 

“Who do you think you are? You’re just a stupid Hufflepuff.” He laughs devilishly down at me, taking a step forward towards me. 

“And you’re an emotionally fragile little boy who can’t see a helping hand if it slapped him.” I shoot back. “Apparently.” I add, unsure as to why he was crying and not wanting to jump to any conclusions. 

“Help?” He scoffs, laughing sarcastically. “Does it look like I need help?” He spreads his arms out to apparently show all the great things he has going for him, but all I see is a sullen, silver haired boy with red rimmed eyes, wet eyelashes and dark circles as deep as tartarus, 

“I don’t know, Draco, I’m not the one crying in empty classrooms. Do you need help?” I ask him sincerely, taking a step towards him. My mother always said that too much of anything was a bad thing, including compassion. That was always going to be the death of me. I’d likely get stabbed by someone and hope it made them feel better. 

“Not from the likes of you.” He seethes

“Well, no accounting for bad taste. See you around.” I shrug, turning my back on Draco and continuing down the hall. Silence stretches out and the only sound is the clop of my shoes on the concrete. 

“I know who you are, Marnie Millicent.” He calls out after me, and the way he says my name has the hair on my neck standing up. “You’re on my radar now.” Although it sounds like a threat, I’m not too sure what being on Draco’s ‘radar’ entails. 

“Like I said, see you around.” I call back just before rounding the hallway and attempting to wipe any trace of Draco from my mind. 

But just like a red wine stain on white leather, he won’t leave. 

[janeyseymour]

Dessert For Breakfast

I’ve decided to continue with this little SiX/Waitress crossover, so uh, here you go?? 

prompt: ooo i'm so glad to see that people are liking the jane and jenna story :') i can't wait to see what you write next! what if bo gets sad at the time jane spends with the pomatters. less in a mom/daughter way (personally i see bo and jane as close friends like abby and andrea would be) but more like jane is slipping away. jane is still around and ALL the queens hangout at least once a week so it's not like anything has really changed. it's a shift in the ~vibe~ ahfkjajf if that makes sense

I’m not quite sure that my brain did what it was supposed to over even really followed the prompt all that much, but I hope you still enjoy it? 

Since beginning to nanny for the Pomatter-Hunterson household, Jane had grown quite fond of the family. Oftentimes, long after the day’s work was done, the blonde hung around with the three.

Not much had changed in reality. The other five queens were usually out of the house during the times where Jane was watching Lulu. It’s just that every once in a while, the second queen would walk into the house expecting a home cooked meal to be on the table like it so often was only to be met with a silent household. The third queen would rush into the house mere minutes later apologizing profusely about how “Lu kept begging me to stay for dinner. I couldn’t say no to that sweet little face,” or “Lulu was so excited to have all of us together. I couldn’t leave right when Jim and Jenna got home.”

It’s not that Anne was jealous of the six year old. No. Even she, as petty as the green queen could be, would not be jealous of a six year old. So, the second queen let her successor have her fun. If Jane was happy, well then so be it. She could wait another thirty minutes to eat. 

But more and more, the conversation with the blonde would turn into “Jenna said the funniest thing today,” or “Oh yeah! Jenna and I did this today,” and that’s what would drive Anne up a wall. 

Since being reincarnated and travelling on tour together before settling at their home in New York, Anne and Jane had a special bond. It wasn’t quite like a mother-daughter dynamic as the avid fans of the show made it out to be; they were just exceptionally close friends. Regardless of who Jane was with, her mothering tendencies were bound to shine at some point; it just happened to be that she was out with her predecessor a lot. 

“Oh! Jenna and I-” Jane began.

“Would you shut up about Jenna? I get it! She’s great, she’s your new best friend, blah blah blah,” Anne snapped.

“What?” Jane was visibly confused. Anne was her best friend, not Jenna. 

“All you do now whenever you're here now is talking about Lulu, Jim and Jenna. What about us Jane? What about me?” The second queen asked the last question rather quietly. She was a bit embarrassed to admit she felt this way.

“Annie,” Jane sighed gently, her tone immediately getting soft. “Is that how you really feel?”

“I-” Anne threw her arms up in exasperation. “I don’t know!”

“Honey,” Jane reached out towards her friend. “Is that really how you feel?”

“It’s just that you always used to be around whenever I wanted to do something. You’re not always now. I don’t know,” Anne looked up at the blonde. “Maybe I’m just being stupid. You deserve to have other friends. I’m sorry.”

“If I made you feel that you’re not my best friend anymore, I’m really sorry Annie. You’re always going to be my number one. I can do my best to be here more again.”

“No!” Anne shook her head. “I was being selfish. I guess I just got used to having you around all the time. If Jenna and Lulu make you happy, you should hang out with them. I can go vibe on my own.”

“What if,” Jane smiled at her thought. “On Saturday, we head over to Jenna’s diner and grab some breakfast pie?”

“Dude, really? You always say I can’t have dessert for breakfast.”

“I think I can make an exception this once. Her pies are literally to die for.”

“Yes!” Anne fist pumped. 

So that Saturday, the two walked down to Lulu’s Pies. 

“Oh hey Jane,” Jenna smiled from behind the cash register when she saw the blonde. 

“Jane!” Lulu came bouncing out from behind her mother. “Guess what! I have-” the little girl took in that Jane wasn’t by herself this time. “Oh my gosh! You’re the lady from the cafe! Thank you so much for that extra treat!”

Anne smiled. She didn’t think that her sneaking an extra treat into the young one’s bag would be remembered a month later. “Anne.” She grinned.

“I’m Lulu. This is my mama. Do you want a slice of pie? My mama makes the best pies in the whole world! Today’s special is In The Dark, Dark Chocolate pie.” Anne had to bite back a laugh. The pie’s name was so dirty, but hearing it come out of the six year old’s mouth with such innocence was adorable. “There’s also Wild, Wild Berry pie, or Mermaid Marshmallow. Or, Lulu’s Strawberry Dream pie. That one’s named after me! And guess what? I made it up!” Anne could see why Jane had grown so fond of the youngster.

“That would be awesome! Do you think you can pick the slice of pie for me?” Anne grinned. 

“Yeah! But, we gotta sit down first. We can sit in my booth!” Anne was pulled by Lulu to a small booth in the back of the diner. 

“Jane!” Lulu called. “Come on! We have some coloring to do! Mama even bought me new colored pencils!” 

“Go on hun. I can bring over your usual. Anything special for Anne?”

“Maybe some hot chocolate?”

“You got it. I’ll be over to talk. The others have it covered for a while.”

“Can I tell you a secret?” Anne asked the little one. Lulu nodded excitedly. “Jane never lets me have sweets this early,” she stage-whispered as she saw the blonde approaching.

“She doesn’t let me either,” Lulu laughed. “Mama and Daddy don’t either. They say I gotta eat all my vegetables before I can have pie.” 

“You girls are already gossiping about me?” Jane laughed good-heartedly as she sat down across the booth that Anne and Lulu were occupying. 

“No!” Both girls' hands shot up in defense. The two had very similar tendencies. 

“I’m just joking, loves.” 

“Alrighty, I got a cup o’ Joe for Jane, and two hot chocolates.” Jenna laughed as she watched the younger girls’ eyes light up.

“Really Mama? I get to have hot chocolate this early?” Lulu asked excitedly.

“A sweet treat every once in a while doesn’t hurt babe,” Jenna pushed the drink towards her daughter. “Just be careful not to spill.”

“Jane told me you like hot chocolate?” Jenna pushed the other one towards the girl with space buns. 

“Yes. Thank you,” Anne’s energy shifted with the presence of the woman she was slightly jealous of. 

“No problem hun. I’m just gonna go grab the pies, and then would you mind if I joined y’all?” Jenna wandered away only to return seconds later with four slices of pie.

“So you’re Jenna.” Anne looked the brunette up and down.

“So,” Jenna sighed as she took a seat next to Jane. “You’re the one who sugared up my daughter?” She looked at Anne.

“Ma’am, I-” Anne started getting defensive.

“Love, she’s just joking,” Jane stopped the second queen before she could finish her sentence. 

“No, no, I don’t mind at all. It’s not every day a broadway icon gives your daughter an extra cookie because she had good manners,” Jenna smiled. Anne relaxed slightly at this. She was still a bit weary of the brunette.“I’m sorry if I came off as rude at first.”

“It’s alright.” Anne lifted the fork up to her mouth and took a bite. The second queen’s face went from neutral to a grin in mere seconds.“Holy-”

“Anne,” Jane interrupted.

“Holy moly this is great!” Anne dove into her slice of chocolate pie. “How did you do this?”

“It’s baked from the heart,” Jenna grinned.

“No, seriously! How did you-”

“Anne! Look! I drew us!” Lulu shoved a paper in the second queen’s face. 

“Wow! This is so good!” Anne complimented. 

“You can have it if you want!”

“I’ll make sure it goes in a very special place in my room. Do you think you could sign it for me?”

“Yes!” Lulu wrote her name down on the paper before handing it back to Anne. “It’s not that good, but Mama says with practice, my handwriting will get a lot better!”

“You know Lu, Anne used to sign things all the time! She was on Broadway with Jane. Isn’t that cool?” 

“You and Jane were on Broadway together?” Lulu looked up at her new friend with big eyes.

“Yep. Me and ol’ Janey-”

“Not old,” Jane interjected. 

“Me and ol’ Janey did a show together! It was a lot of fun!” 

“Not old!” Jane laughed once again.

“The show was amazing,” Jenna said earnestly. “You have a spectacular voice. I wish I had that kind of talent.”

“Thank you!” Anne let herself go. Maybe this woman isn’t so bad afterall, she thought.

“I’m serious Anne. Your voice is killer. And my husband had tears rolling down his face from laughing so hard at some of the things you said. You were amazing.”

“Thank you so much. This pie is amazing.” The green queen turned her attention to Jane. “Is this where you disappear to every Saturday morning?” Jane nodded sheepishly.

“What does she get?” Anne turned her attention to Jenna.

“She gets pie,” Lulu ratted out the blonde. 

“Jane!” Anne exclaimed. “You preach all of this stuff about eating healthy and ‘no dessert’ before our meals, and you sneak off and eat pie every Saturday for breakfast?” 

“No?” Jane’s voice went up an octave.

“Oh just wait until Aragon gets a load of-”

“If you don’t tell her, you can come with me,” the blonde offered.

“Annie! You should come!” Lulu jumped around.

“You’re always welcome to come hang out with us on Saturday mornings. I’ll have a nice hot cup of cocoa waiting for you,” Jenna enticed the woman.

“You got me with the hot chocolate.” Anne pointed at the brunette. “I like you. Feeding into my bad habits.”

“Let’s not make a habit of it.” Jane put her head in her hands.

“So, you got any dirt on ol’ Janey here?” Anne spoke through a mouthful of pie. 

“Sometimes Jane will bring me to the diner to visit Mama, and she’ll always have a slice of whatever the special is.”

“I like you kid,” Anne chuckled. “I got one. One time I caught her in the kitchen at like 3 in the morning baking cookies for herself. I was silenced with a promise of getting half the batch.”

“One time Mama was eating ice cream out of the container! She let me have some if I didn’t tell Daddy.”

“And you did anyway.” 

“He wasn’t mad Mama,” Lulu giggled.

“Not with you anyway,” Jenna muttered. “I got a stern talking to.”

The four spent the morning together laughing sharing different anecdotes about each other. Every once in a while, Jane and Jenna would make eye contact and smile. 

When Jane and Anne made their way out the door, Lulu smothered them both in hugs. 

“I’ll see you next week?” Lulu asked Anne expectedly. 

“For sure.” The second queen hugged the small girl tightly. “Thank you for my drawings.” Anne held up the several pieces of paper Lulu had gifted her with.

“If you guys are ever up for it, I’m sure the others wouldn’t mind if you came over for dinner one night,” Jane offered. 

“Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose.” Jenna waved her off.

“None of them will care,” Anne said. “Once they meet you guys, they’ll know why all Jane talks about is you guys anymore.”

“Oh?” Jenna’s eyebrows shot up. She didn’t know her family had been the talk of the house.

“All good things I promise,” Jane assured. 

“Just bring a couple pies, and you’ll have their hearts,” Anne joked.

“Noted.”

With promises of returning the following weekend, Jane and Anne made their way out of the diner, bellies full- and both with a slice of Mermaid Marshmallow pie. 

As they were walking, Anne admitted, “You know, I walked into that diner intending on hating Jenna.”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t though.”

“That’s good love.”

“She’s real good at baking.”

“That she is.”

“And Lulu is adorable.”

“That she is.”

“Can they come over for dinner soon? I think they’d fit in well.”

“I think they would too.”

“Hey, did you know that you and Jenna look kind of similar?”

“Oh her husband has made it known that he thinks that for a while now.”

Turns out, Jane having another friend was also a good thing for Anne: she got free pie and hot chocolate every Saturday morning now.

[thehandsomeasshole]

@starttheanarchy from X

The stutter brought out a bark of laughter out of her, the child-like objection that was bemusing to her, finally get a reaction then just more annoyance. It was rare to have the chance to take shots back at the CEO considering most of the time her attention was on avoiding death rather then actually retorting.

"Ah-ah-ah," she shook her finger with each sound even though the sight was only seen by her. "I said scrap, pay attention. Or don't, you do seem to have the same attention span as a varkid. But their items have far more versatility for reuse, Hyperion is subpar in comparison to several others actually. Cheap shortcuts hidden behind pretty but also uninspired metal casings."

Staring at the half taken apart engine block and the strew of gears and bolts on the ground around her, Gaige decided that she was probably not going to be able to get anything else out of this without having to take a torch to the thing. Tools were tossed into the metal tool case, the loud clattering being easily picked up by her com. The spare pieces that didn't remain attached to the technical went into a bag that was slung over the mechromancer’s shoulder soon after. A once over of the area to make sure she cleaned up her mess, a habit from her junk yard picking days back on Eden, and she was slowly making her way back to the building that rested in the Dust.

"Only optic sensors? Seriously?" There was actual disbelief in her voice as she wondered just how the company could consider itself a lead in the realm of robotics. Low bar apparently. Though her lips pulled back into a snarl at the insult of calling her hard work junk. That was revolutionary technology in several fields that was put together in a backyard shed by her alone. It might not be sleek and clean, but it was amazing. And it was that simple thought that brought her next question.

"So what does that say about your robots and yourself if mine is making its way through yours like they are tissue paper?" She knew there was plenty of evidence of the sheer chaos that the mechromancer and her robot caused alone in Hyperion bases. And it was clear proof in her mind just how much more superior Death Trap was to any robot.

"Smart, sure say what ever you need to help yourself sleep at night pal."

He blinked in surprise as she practically scolded him, one brow cocking right up to his hairline.

Another laugh slipped past his lips, "Nah, you caught me. The whole time you've been bitching I've been, y'know, starin' at the pile of paperwork on my desk and wondering if the dead guy's family really needs to know. You ever get that? Probably not, you're poor and don't have your own company. The thing is: I'm screwed either way. If I don't tell 'em, I just end up having some crying, hysterical spouse running around asking after them. If I do, I have to go to a meeting with the board members just so they feel like they've done something by asking me 'was there anything anyone could've done?' and me telling them the same thing over and over just so I don't have to put fifteen people out of jobs and pay a ridiculous settlement fee to the family."

He scoffed, now barely even remembering he was still talking to Gaige, "You know what I got when my wife got killed? A slap on the wrist and they told me to get back to wo-..."

Jack froze, eyes wide and he looked at the echo. Oh my god. Oh my god. Please don't be listening. Please don't be listening. 

"Well, y'know, Hyperion isn't intended for reuse. Tediore's probably only good for spare parts cause you can just- y'know, shake one of their guns real hard and the parts just fall right out!" He laughed slightly, trying his absolute best to make sure the subject was well and truly steered away from his word vomit, "When you own your own company, cheap shortcuts are the only way to get everything done under budget. You're quick to bash on 'em, but if you could give your bot the exact same specs, everythin', but have him be lighter and easier to fix, wouldn't ya do it?"

"It's not just optic- No- What? Look here, kid. Why would I tell you, a dumb bandit who's out for blood she's never going to get, how exactly my robots tick and all the goodies we cram inside 'em to get 'em working as best as they can so you can steal them?" Jack, again, laughed at the mechromancer, "Or was that a sad attempt at goading me into spilling all the funky stuff we're working on? Tempting, truly, but no thanks."

A deep frown settled onto Jack's lips, "Ooh, baby, you do not want to start with telling me how many of my bots you've massacred." His eyes narrowed, "I could send a moonshot down when you're not expecting it and have it crush your little science fair project. How's that sound? Bad? Thought so."

"Alright, look, we're getting nowhere here. It's like we're insulting each other's children, for God's sake. Let's settle and just say we're both proud of our bots, even if mine are clearly superior." He huffed slightly, arms crossing over his chest and he let his feet drop back down to rest on the floor, "Just a shame you're wasting talent like that working for a bunch of bandits."

"Oh, and, please, kid. Is that coming from the girl who 'accidentally' killed one of her classmates? I'm absolutely smarter than you psychopaths." he laughed loudly, eyes returning to the tabs open on his computer, "I mean, it's incredible how hypocritical all you assholes are when you probably all have a higher kill count than I do. Y'all just stroll into my Hyperion bases and choose violence, don't ya? And every other camp you see, you run in guns blazing. Have you ever slowed down, even talked to a psycho? Granted, they talk consistent nonsense. A whole lot about meat puppets and poop trains.”

Jack grimaced slightly, “Alright, maybe psychos weren’t the best example. But,” the smile soon returned to his lips,"I just think it’s real cute y’all think you’re the good guys in this scenario. That’s all.”