#no room for a mini fridge

[828hate]

Ever lived in a home where you couldn't use the fridge?

You make yourself something to eat, just to have roomates steal it?

Even if you label it and go out of your way to ask them not to because you need it for lunch tomorrow?

It gets stolen every single time.

It's gotten so bad I'll keep the food in my room and risk food poisoning just to make sure I get to have it again.

I really hope this chapter of my life is over soon.. Living here has been a constant nightmare. But the sad part is there is no end in sight v.v

[hofftrans]

ok actually building more on the idea of jigsaw apprentice grocery shopping trips and the various reasons they all suck at it (John doesn't go out bc he's too ill and also way too recognisable)

Amanda - It's not really Amanda's fault that she sucks at getting the groceries, she struggles with chronic nausea as a side effect of her sobriety so she ends up buying lots of small, bland snack foods and forgets to get actual ingredients for big meals. She does eventually start buying more fruit to make smoothies for John as his cancer gets worse and she flips her shit when she catches hoffman stealing it for himself later

Lawrence - Lawrence should be the best at getting the groceries but he forgets that basically only hoffman and himself can cook (and hoffman sticks to simple staple meals.) He buys a lot of fancy preserved foods and fresh ingredients assuming the other apprentices will cook with them only to find Adam eating feta out of the jar with a fork.

Mark - Hoffman is usually the one to actually get the groceries as he does buy a decent amount of food and he's an okay cook (he used to have regular family dinners with angelina where he'd cook her comfort foods.) He cooks a lot of pasta bakes and roasts, tends to stick to stodgy, hearty meals. The rest of the stuff he buys is usually microwave ready meals and those big chunky meat soup cans for big boys. One year Amanda buys him one of those super cheap kiss the cook aprons as a joke and he now unironically wears it every time he cooks.

Adam - They let Adam buy the groceries one single time and he ended up bringing home seven bags of frozen potato gems, four litres of mountain dew and a pack of darts. John doesn't talk to him for two weeks.

[xxxcertifiednerdxxx]

my tinder date wants to know why you’re banned from tinder

Ask and ye shall receive!

Gather round, folks, and lend an ear as I tell you about Arnold.

No, he’s not a first date gone wrong, nor is he a scorned ex-lover who came up as a potential match. He isn’t a rival to whom I am bitterly attracted, and he isn’t an unrequited crush.

Arnold is my son.

He is also a rubber chicken.

[image description: a white hand holds a blue rubber chicken against a white wall. The rubber chicken has a red beak, comb, wattles, and feet, as well as a gold collar that’s says “SQUEEZE ME!”]

Let me set the scene.

A couple years ago, on a cold night in late autumn, I went to a grocery store with some friends. We all separated to get what we needed.

I don’t remember if I actually got anything for myself in that trip, but I do remember wandering around, only to come across a giant bin of rubber chickens.

Immediately thinking of the vine where that person presses a bunch of rubber chickens (geese? some sort of fowl) to make a loud noise, I did the same thing, probably to the chagrin of fellow shoppers.

Some of my friends joined me in my shenanigans, and we left the store in a jolly mood.

Days later, one of my roommates, who was one of the friends from the first grocery trip, came back from another grocery trip with a gift for me.

It was a blue and red rubber chicken.

I looked on my new child with complete adoration and named him Arnold. I thanked my roommate with all my heart and left to plan the many hijinks I would get up to with Arnold. (He has admittedly been through a lot, but the wear and tear mostly comes from love.)

One day, i had the bright idea to make Arnold a Tinder account.

I did not give myself much time to consider the idea before diving in. Arnold had a photo shoot, and I uploaded as many photos as Tinder would allow for his profile. I believe I put his age somewhere in the 20s. I picked the option for any gender to match so as many people as possible would see him. According to what I put in his bio, he got the Covid vaccine, has a natural talent for singing, lives with his mom, and likes Kpop.

Then I published his account.

While matching with people amused me at first, keeping Arnold’s Tinder account active eventually became a chore. Every so often, Tinder would email me and say my his account would be hidden if I didn’t open the app and use it.

I swiped through people, and whenever i matched with people, i would just shoot them a simple “yo.” I tried not to carry on any conversations, though, because I myself was not interested in going on any dates. This was just to entertain me and maybe some other people who came across Arnold.

One day, I got an email saying Arnold’s account was reported and I was no longer welcome on Tinder. I assume someone reported Arnold bc he isn’t an actual person, so I was technically breaking the laws of Tinder or whatever. It was honestly a relief; no more swiping through profiles just to keep the account alive.

I still have Arnold, and I still love him. But you will never see him, or me, on a dating app again.

TL/DR: I made a Tinder Account for Arnold, my rubber chicken. It took over half a year, but Arnold’s account was eventually reported for not being a real person, and I was banned from Tinder.

[sarcastic-clapping]

have you ever had luck so good that it made you suspicious? like yes everything happening right now is objectively amazing but like. what, for free? i don’t believe you. why? what steaming turd is god going to dump on me later to balance these scales? sorry but i’m looking that gift horse directly in the mouth i don’t trust like that

[sugarand-everythingnice]

Does anybody have any easy dinner recipes a person can make while taking care of 2 kids?

Please share em with a gal 😭

[inkblot-inc]

Wanda and Skitch definitely have separate rooms after they move in together.

I think the concept of couples having separate bedrooms is pretty neat; not having to compromise on your own aesthetics and things to display in your own space? Plus sleepovers? That eats 🤌🏾

Though Wanda and Skitch can overlap in some ways with each other, aesthetically, they're pretty different:

Skitch totally collects figurines and CDs, they're not the tidiest in the bunch when it comes to organization. They definitely have a "hidden" drawer for snacks while watching movies and playing video games.

Wanda on the other hand is very tidy when it comes to her room, organized bookshelves full over her old sketchbooks and maybe some of her favorite novels (giving very much Charlaine Harris type). She keeps an electric kettle in her room, with her go-to tea when she settles in to read or draw, or get some last minute work done.

Wanda definitely chose who got which room, though; Wanda likes a lot of natural light in her room, whereas Skitch doesn’t really pay attention to that sort of thing and is used to hermiting out

Wanda and Skitch really decide who's room they're sleeping in based off the vibe for the day or what they have planned. Skitch's room is definitely used for movie and/or game nights and Wanda's is more for lazy day cuddling.

They're both homey bedrooms in their own ways.

Y'all can sound off on other decorations/furnishings/trinkets you think they have in their rooms and/or around the house, I'm curious

[lonely-lady-and-a-foxglove-man]

The old office was divided into two rooms; Rita’s office in the front and Juno’s in the back.

Rita’s was well… homey. She had a huge beaten up sofa covered in stuffed animals and fluffy blankets, and the walls where covered in stream posters and photos. She had stuck glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling, walls, and floor, and every available surface was covered in paper spaceships. People would show up and wonder if they had accidentally gotten the address for someone’s apartment.

Juno’s on the other hand, looked a little like a crazed conspiracy nut from some edgy af stream had recently gotten caught in a tornado and had yet to get things sorted back out. The walls and ceiling where covered in papers and photographs connected by bits of thread creating a sort of three d mesh making it difficult to move around. The floor was scattered with more bits of paper, all covered in a strange, incomprehensible scrawl. To top it off, the one window was completely papered over with what looked like photo negatives. The one clear spot was in the center of the room, largely because that was where the rug was.

[meeeebbottalofscruhmpyuyy]

Hello demo, I am learning how to draw you, do you like it? This is my first try. :)

AWEE LADSY THSIDE IS WONDERFULLY! Imaas putit on tehdh frigde!

[windowsandfeelings]

My favorite restaurant in the world and also New York closed during the pandemic and it's the only thing I want to eat

[iamonlyhereforthefreefood]

I have to stay at the hotel once more night because the roads are so icy and I have to sleep on the right side of the bed tonight because I had my outside clothes on in the left side foolishly thinking I would be going home tonight.

[quettasecond]

despite the fact this is better circumstances its harder to make healthy meals for myself now bc theres 3 other peopl (sometimes 4) living here so i cant guarantee ill have the ingredients i need (or anything i mark as mine and save for later might be thrown out without consultation) and im not the main cook so the kitchen isnt mine and also the food cooking stuff wont always be clean. so i have to hope that jay makes something i like for dinner if i wanna eat healthy

[apollo-zero-one]

I could get a hotplate, an electric kettle, and a camping sink- the kind with a foot pump and a refillable reservoir- and a washbasin with a scrub rack, and a 5 gallon water jug. And I could make my bedroom into a tiny apartment. I am retreating from my family and if I can't move out, I will simply move inward. I will pay whatever rent they decide on given my continued use of space, water, electricity, and the wifi. I will however make it clear that I am no longer contributing to groceries and will be taking nothing else from the kitchen ever again, nor will I be making any use of any of the dishware. I will reclaim my mini fridge and the handful of cutlery and bowls I purchased when I briefly lived in a dorm, and they will not leave my new mini apartment.

[charlottan]

hot take or something i prefer warm drinks because sometimes the taste of Cold overpowers the taste of Drink

[smbhax]

Devo the Cursed creeps out of the mini fridge to ambush Polnareff in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Heritage for the Future on Dreamcast

Game play session: https://youtu.be/Hv3cnRwCqUs

[lunarreaper12]

I love my grandparents so much

Grandma: Can you get me my peanuts and a coke from the fridge? Grandpa: Your penis and a coke? Gma: My PEANUTS and a coke Gpa: Oh! (After a few seconds of presumably retrieving said peanuts and coke) Gpa: I always got your peanuts in my hand don’t worry

[coffeebrownn]

why is everybody moving out? :[