#not actually a vent lmao but thats the tag

[zeawesomebirdie]

So to recap the last 11 days I've:

- caught covid

- hyperfixated on superbat

- read about a million words of superbat fanfic

- watched my first DC movie (Injustice)

- somehow gotten even sicker

- finally gotten back to watching season four of Gunsmoke

- came up with no less than three separate superbat fic ideas that I cannot write because I'm still too sick

- gone to the ER because y'know covid (I'm fine btw, I promise! I'm back home now)

- came up with a Gunsmoke/DCU crossover fic that is so far beyond my current capabilities I swear on the karking Force

- started reading my first comic books (Injustice: Gods Among Us)

- written a superbat fansong because of said Gunsmoke/DCU crossover fic

- I'm still sick btw

- girl help?

[mishapen-dear]

mmm i can sense the discourse rumbling in the distance. Everyone please remember to tag your neg/critical/discourse posts, please

[justablah56]

that moment when you think about a friend you haven't seen in 2 years and you realize wow the attachment issues are strong with this one

[guardian-angle22]

… still thinking about how Iris suggesting an annulment is really lovely in theory, but is actually completely not applicable to this situation. why does this show insist on forcing me to suspend logic and/or all legal knowledge I posses??

[aroace-polyshow]

buahh i need to figure out what the fuck is wrong with me

[l-cereta]

in a bad mood for multiple unrelated reasons :thumbsup:

[wr0ngwarp]

DON'T WORRY, YOUNG SUICIDES

THE VULTURES'LL PICK YOUR BONES DRY

HALF-DIGESTED AND ETERNAL

SOMEWHERE LOST IN THE EPHEMERAL

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu skye forever mine art with lyrics from Unconditional Love by Against Me!

[drowsymachine]

i need to get better at accepting constructive criticism honestly, and any advice in general tbh. ive got to stop seeing someone genuinely trying to be helpful as some attack/slight against me

[bl00dw1tch]

Baby girl im in the worst possible fucking mood

[zeawesomebirdie]

Me whenever anyone else says their writing is cringe: cringe is dead, kill the part of you that cringes not the part that is cringe, etc etc

Me whenever I try to edit this fic: I must stab my eyes out so that I may no longer need to look at how incredibly cringe this is

[jadeneppy]

Yoyoyoyo

[littleturtlefish]

making MY own money and having MY own personal credit card is such a surreal moment for me. i can actually buy things now without having to ask others (im still in that habit but one day. one day.)! i can put money in my bank account and only i will know about it! i can LITERALLY commission my art (likely will never do it but the thought is there)! i don't have to repeatedly thank strangers on discord for gifting me nitro (thabks, still)! i can finally be scammed on websites that steal your credit card info!

It feels so weird. I'm technically not financially independent yet but I am in the position where my actions have an aftermath, good or bad.

[mxddyhero]

Man..

[absurdumsid]

hi ! you can call me sid !

my pronouns are he/they/its ! and my favourite colours are FF002A and FF91AF !! I mostly use whiteboard or clip studio !! my favourite sanses are fell and farm <3

i love taiyaki ! in fact,, you can buy me one here !? <- im still settin it up lmao dont actually-- ive also got a pronouns page, a toyhouse, a masterlist, AND- thats all actually lmao

all of my art is ok for personal use ! credit is appreciated, but not necessary, just don't claim my art as yours please ! (unless it is art of my/someone else's ocs, in which case, please ask me/the owner first !!)

I'm aro-ace so honestly my stuff can be interpreted as either romantic or platonic !! I do try to tag stuff that's meant to be shippy with their proper ship names !

i don't have any dnis, i personally just avoid the things i'm uncomfortable with like proship/comship or dreammare or etc. i'm aware i can't police the things that people participate in, but i hope you're aware that this isn't a safe space for those subjects or people who interact with them. it's MY safe space !!!! and I get to choose what i interact with !!!

other blogs and tags under the cut lmao this thing got rlly long

other blogs

@absurdump is my rb account !

@dustbar is the askblog for bar sanses !

@photosynthesizing-in-the-fields is a saejun blog i forgor abt--

@bad-sanses-smp <- im a mod/mun there !! i'm dust ! <3

general tags

art tag is #sid art

oc tag is #sid ocs

talking tag is #sid rambles

askbox tag is #sid answers

reblog tag is #sid rb

other rb tag is #sid replies

more specific tags

serious/vent tag is #darius talks.

school tag is #sid homework

crushes tag is #sorry for pining on main

i believe that's all, I'll edit this if anything else comes to mind !

last update: 4/20/2024

[foressfaction]

autism blast me on why you like toby

*Cracks knuckles*

he's literally me

Ok good day

No but for real ever since like 5th grade, (i was around 11???) i remember finding his story after very unmonitored internet access through DA (i was and still am addicted to DA) and after reading it, it was like, wow. Okay- thats really relatable. I struggled with severe family issues with the same problem of alcohol and gambling, along with also losing a sibling. I went through severe bullying and everything else what not, not to make it about me or anything but i didn't have much of an outlet at all, i never got into anime, fashion(basic fashion), never had many friends irl. I was already 'in the fandom' but didn't know much about him til i genuinely sat down and found it on accident while searching fandom tags. (back when kastoway actually posted there still)

I would literally stalk the acc man it was BAD. i always used him to vent and as an outlet, i loved the art style and my art would occasionally be influenced by it unconsciously. I would write and roleplay a ton and eventually developed my own take and interpretation. I find tons of comfort in anti-hero like characters and this fandom has been the only thing i ever felt welcomed in. And the only thing i seem to like as i am still not into much else but horror and cosplay. I wish i was my age now (19) back when the fandom was really booming. Where the nostalgic styles were around and the 'cringey' lol ask blogs (i would've been doing one dgmw)

I would've been a big hit back then but now its just harder to be known. (not that its my main purpose i just wonder how far i would've gotten when this fandom was more alive)

Moral of story, I've always related to him, i mean the guy quite literally gave me a reason to keep going? He inspires my aesthetic, my career (story making, film and writing) honestly if it wasn't for me stumbling across him..tbh I'd probably be normal LMAO but i would've taken a different route with my art and writing if...At all? He kinda kept me a reason to do everything so.

As i got older it only seemed to get worse tbh. Hell i own like 4 hoodies help me, its literally. I have i have

I have like a 10 page doc on JUST headcanons and a 30k word long rewrite i am not okay. Hes in my mind

He's in my ears

Hes in my eyes

He is in my tears

You would literally have to pry him out of my cold dead blue fingers.

I could go on but my brain literally died mid sentence. Mighy edit later jusy remond me omg typing is hard now, look wjay u did.

[maddsmallow]

hi im gonna complain about people seeing hank and connor as father and son under the break so if you see them like that maybe dont read. like you do you but if this is gonna upset you then. dont fuckin read it lmao

if tumblr puts this in the fucking tags even tho i didnt tag it 1) im sorry, and 2) im gonna be fucking pissed im just trying to vent on my own got dang blog

cropped out the person who made these tags because i dont even know them and also im not a fucking asshole thats gonna put someone on blast like that but. this is the EXACT problem i have with hank and connor as father/son. i dont even mind connor seeing hank as a mentor or something like that (even tho i personally disagree with using the term "father figure"), but it's the "connor is like a new chance for hank to be a dad" that fucking gets me. do you not see all the different CANON reasons why that works completely against hank's character, and takes away connor's say in the whole situation?? hank IS a dad. he's a dad to a dead boy. basically his whole fuckin personality is him mourning over the loss of cole because he loves him SO much. you think he's gonna cling to the first mentee he's had since cole's death and immediately have him replace his dead fucking child? that's like, making hank give into some kind of fucked up delusion. that's mentol illness luv. imagine misunderstanding a character THAT badly.

and that isnt even getting into the whole "you're taking away all of connor's agency as a fully grown adult man" thing. he's not a child. he's an android that was activated only a few months ago, sure, but he was literally created to be like 27-33 or something. he deals with guns. he looks at pole dancers at the eden club. he works with murder scenes. you literally ARE taking away all of his agency as an adult man by seeing him as some little puppyboy that needs a dad to take care of him.

i mean of course you can take these characters and do whatever you want with them outside of canon, they're basically just barbie dolls lmao. but to claim that it's CANON that hank would think of connor as his own literal son, that he thinks that before the game's even over?? absolutely fucking not. those jokes of hank being like "who's my son?" and connor answering "me:)" and hank's relationship bar goes up, it's cute i guess but if that happened in the game? if that was a real choice in the game? hank would've shot connor without a second fucking thought. hell no hank would've thought connor was anything CLOSE to what cole was to him. hank straight up would've murdered the real connor and not even been upset about it when sixty told him so. david cage can eat my entire ass for agreeing that they're father and son, he just said that because he's a homophobic piece of shit, and that's literally the ONLY thing ever to point at them having that sort of relationship.

and i'm not gonna sit here and be like "but anyways here's all the reasons hank and connor are TOTALLY in love" because i dont actually think that's canon either. i'm just playing with them like barbie dolls lmao. my problem is people taking subtext that doesnt fucking exist of them being "like father and son" and claiming it's the be all end all of their whole relationship. their view of them as father and son is the ONLY way to see them. which is just not fucking true. there's NOTHING in canon to support them as being anything but close friends or enemies. that's it. and then they come onto these posts about hankcon, which obviously have NOTHING to do with them since they dont ship it, and tell the OP who ships them "fuck you." like?? you could have just scrolled. you could have just kept fucking scrolling. you fool. you moron. what happened to ship and let ship. just fucking move on, jesus christ. stop taking the time and effort out of your day to go out of your way to 1) make yourself upset by seeing this content and not just blacklisting it and blocking the posters, and 2) making someone else upset that you took the time to be a shithead on something that obviously wasn't even meant for you but made THEM happy. just stop !!! log off!! touch grass!! and this goes for hankcon shippers who do the same!! what the fuck is wrong with you!! we're all just here to vibe and love on these dork ass characters!!!!! fuck !!!!!!!!!!!

also it's super cringe when bryan dechart is playing the game and you're all screaming "wow best father son duo everrrrr" in the chat as if that also doesnt make bryan uncomfortable because he's gotta be super fucking careful about how he fuckin speaks about his character to everyone and not piss off all the rabid father-sonners by insinuating they're only friends. just. shut the fuck up. hankcon shippers who try to shove it in other people's faces also need to shut the fuck up. jesus fucking christ

IN OTHER WORDS. old man yells at cloud is basically me rn

^actual pic of me

anyways here's a cookie 🍪