#not really I owe all fic writers my life no matter what they write

[milf-lover42]

I swear to god if Beetlejuice 2 comes out and no one writes Delia/reader or Delia/Barbara or Delia/Beetlejuice’s wife fanfiction I will be adding names to my death note

[muzanswaifu]

Ive seen a lot of people confuse me leaving for “people being mean to writers” or getting hate for the things i write of how i write them but its not

But Im not leaving just bc of the audience, i can handle some hate and honestly it was kinda fun from them bc ik that hate comes from jealousy and trolling

Im leaving because of other writers and my “friends”

Ik i said i would get into it and i really dont want to all that much bcuz im tired and just wanna be done with this but it feels wrong to leave under a false assumption and let people think their actions dont have consequences

Ive dealt with a lot from my peers on here, back talking, hating, straight up bullying, and i just cant anymore

I cant deal with drama irl AND on the internet, bcuz at the end of the day i can just delete everything on here and be done with it all so thats wat im gonna do

Tbh this has been building up for a while, i can only handle so much from “friends” and irl i cut people off pretty quick and on here should be no exception but ive fucked up and let people do watever too long and its bitten me in the ass

Yes ik im dramatic lol, ive gotten that a lot and a lot of people hate me for, a lot of people love me for it, its how i am and it keeps things interesting. I get it, i like to make a lot of call out posts. Y? Bc people deserve to be called out and idgaf ab appearances on here. If someone did something bad, im gonna call them out bc last i checked its my blog and i can do wat i want. If u wouldnt do it, thats fine, its ur decision, and this is mine

Yes, i dont post a lot, I. Am. Busy. I have work. I have school. I have a social life. I cant write smut all the time even tho i want to, and at the end of the day, its not my job to write smut all day so people can read it and move on. I like to interact with yall, its fun, i like to talk to a lot of different people on her since my irl friends arent really into anime. Apparently people think im a loser for that? Ok? Sorry i like to talk to people on the internet when im bored instead of producing smut all day for people to read, ig i shouldve remembered im only on here to provide content since i dont deserve to have some fun, my mistake

Requests? Requests r a generosity. So many of my requesters have been absolute angels with being patient in receiving their requests, happy to just see me writing or interacting at all. Others have hounded me regularly telling me im lazy and selfish for not completing my requests, saying im an asshole for not completing them over my own projects bc “they asked first”. LMAO, U WRITE IT THEN???? i dont owe anything to anyone, certainly not someone who comes here solely to read my fics, not even leaving any interaction or encouragement whatsoever, then leave.

The icing on the cake? The tip of the iceburg? Discord of all places. Im sorry some of u didnt enjoy my server, i really am. Ive never used discord before and me and the mods did the best we could and im sorry i couldnt be as attentive to it due to my busy schedule

Im sorry i couldnt get there in time to stop conflicts or just straight up call people out, and im sorry someone had to make another server since they didnt like how i was handling mine bc i didnt take their side in a fight that THEY WERE WRONG IN? But i tried to be nice, tried to defend her and nicely explain y she was she cant say anything they want in any situation bc people get hurt. but it didnt matter. Y? Bc apparently i cant tell people what they can and cant say…

And that made me realize something! Theyre right! Theyre absolutely right and im so stupid for not seeing it until now! I cant stop people from saying things to me. I cant stop people from talking shit ab me. I cant stop people from even saying things on my own blog and server! I just cant. Bcuz in the end, people r gonna say what they want and do what they want bc people dont wanna learn. They dont wanna talk. They dont wanna hear ab how what they do or say affects others. They just wanna do what the want when the want, and they wanna be allowed to, bc fuck everybody else. Everybody is the victim in their own story, and i deserve to be the victim in mine.

And what would a victim do in this situation?

Leave.

[parkitaco]

ok people. i really don't want to have to be saying this but i am once again being struck by the lack of etiquette in the byler fandom and just in current fandom in general so i just. have to say something ok

first off i'm gonna say that fandoms come from a place of love and i know everyone most people have good intentions and love their fic authors but the etiquette around fics and art and all that lovely stuff is,, how shall we put it,, literally nonexistent.

listen. i love writing fic. i love that people like reading my fics that's insane hello?? i love getting comments and kudos and getting messages from ppl who are excited about my future projects it's great!!!

that being said, when i receive messages asking when things will be out/comments on wip wednesday snippets asking if the fic is out yet/messages asking me to tag them when the fic is published, regardless of how good the intentions are it comes off as very demanding and doesn't make me feel good as a writer who is doing this Voluntarily and For Free.

fanfic writers do this for fun!! we are not machines, we are people with our own lives outside of fandom and those lives have to take priority most if not all of the time. this means that yes!! sometimes fics take a while to write!! sometimes chaptered fics take a while to update!! and guess what?? that is totally ok. fanfic writers taking their time is not a bad thing. it means they care and are taking their time to create quality content. it means that they are spending time tending to their real personal lives, which is a normal and healthy thing to do.

there are plenty of posts about why demanding faster updates is bad, and i think that's pretty common knowledge, but i want to talk specifically about these very enthusiastic comments/messages/etc because i don't think anyone means harm but the thing is that fic authors simply do not owe you anything. we don't owe it to you to let you know when a fic will be out, we don't owe it to you to tag you when it is, and we definitely don't owe it to you to provide information that you can easily find out for yourself. as a writer i'm already putting insane amounts of pressure on myself and receiving it from other people, even if that's not the intention, is just not a good feeling.

especially because much of this information is readily available to you!! while you may not be able to find out when a fic will be out (which is probably because the fic author doesn't know either), you are entirely capable of checking the timestamp on a post to see how old it was, then using a little thing called Critical Thinking Skills to determine whether it's likely the fic has been posted or not. if so then great!! most authors have their ao3 accounts linked somewhere on their blog page so YOU (yes, you!!) can go look for the fic on ao3!! if you don't find it, ao3 has a super cool feature where you can subscribe to an author, so you'll get an email notification whenever they post!! and while you're there, if you're truly desperate for something to read, you can always go through the fics they've already posted, and if you've read everything there already and/or they haven't posted anything yet, check their bookmarks and see if there's anything there you like!! and as a last resort, there's always the trusty old search bar on ao3, which you are capable of filtering to every last preference!! the byler fandom is huge and there are tons of fics out there so undoubtedly something will fit your taste.

i know that can feel daunting, and i know it's disappointing when a fic hasn't been posted or updated yet, but the good news is that if you're seeing a snippet it means the author is working on it!! a little patience never hurt anyone, and taking those steps to determine for yourself what's going on with the fic rather than bugging an author who is just trying to go about their life and work on content during whatever free time they have just proves that you care. the simple fact of the matter is that fic authors don't do this for attention, they do it for fun, and therefore we can't cater everything to you or answer questions that you should find the answers to yourself. it's not our responsibility to keep track of people who want to be tagged when a fic is published or want to know when it will be out, because all our energy is going into creating the content you so desperately want!! i'm just begging everyone to be a little bit independent. asking an author for this information just shows you don't care enough to find it for yourself and this sort of laziness is part of why fandoms die.

tldr: fic authors are not machines designed to please you, use some critical thinking once in a while, and please for the love of GOD just go touch grass. breathe some clean air. you'll feel better i promise

[mollyrolls]

fic authors self rec! ♡ when you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. let’s spread the self-love ♡

this is so cute 😭😭

i think ive literally written 5 things so time to plug my ENTIRE BLOG

all shades of blue; hinata shoyo

this one is my babyyyy!!!! i love hinata i love this song i love drinking wine i love everything about it. this was also the first one i wrote where i was proud of it before posting and getting reception on it, so it'll always have a special place in my heart. plus seeing it mean so much to everyone else made all that so much better, it's crazy to think i impacted people like that.

stop the clock; matsukawa issei

this is my self insert fic LMAO so it means a lot to me. i was really proud of the concept and the execution so far is exactly how i was hoping it would go. writing pathetic issei is so much fun; i am living vicariously through yn. picking the music for each chapter is also really fun, and i've been working on doodles for the comics. it's just a way for me to push a lot of my creative limits and i'm enjoying it a lot

hey cupid! ; iwaizumi hajime

where would i be without hey cupid... nowhere! this is the first fic i wrote for this blog, far and away my most popular, and i owe my life to the dream that this stemmed from. hey cupid revitalized my love for writing, and did a lot for me this summer. im pushing the messy yn and having the enemies in enemies to lovers actually hate each other agendas with hey cupid

wouldn't it be nice ; semi eita

wibn has kinda fallen to the wayside at the moment but i still have a lot of love for it. i dont know what it is abt wibn but i feel like literally no pressure? at all? when im writing for it. which is so nice and a really necessary refresher for me. i'm getting to basically make up semi as a character, i love the beachy aesthetic, and i love the beach boys! what's not to love!

o' city lights ; iwaizumi hajime

it's not that i'm not proud of this one per say.... but it feels weird putting it in this list LMFAO

this was very self indulgent and a good coping mechanism for me, and i really like a lot of the metaphor and imagery i worked into it. its obviously a complicated and depressing subject matter but i look back on it with fondness. it's a comfort fic for me in a weird kinda sick and twisted way

[jiangwanyinscatmom]

1, 2, 5, 6, 10, 11, 14, 16, 17, and 20 for Wen Ning. If you’re feeling bored you can do 1 - 25😊🌸(I’m begging you to do all of them I love wen Ning and I feel like I don’t see enough of him😭)

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

His kindness and will to have helped others is very admirable. (u dislike him I don't trust u...)

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

Loves money. That's my boy.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

Nothing. He's also perfect and has done no wrong, ever.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

I would like him to have tea time with Qiqi from Genshin Impact and I am very sure he would get along very well with Baizhu who is resident Genshin Impact resurrector.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Now I do not have an answer for this one but may later.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

...... willing to throw hands for Wei Wuxian....

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

Realizing the extent of why he is Wei Wuxian's friend and just why he chooses to stand with him as much as Lan Wangji does.

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

Downplaying his sense of honor.

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

I'll be your sugar mommy Wen Ning don't worry!!!!

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

Yes. 10/10 bro would bestie up.

11. Would you date this character?

If I was not a lesbian, yes.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

He knows that he can get away with anything when it comes to making puppy eyes to Wen Qing and definitely runs with that for all it's worth.

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?

(｡Ó﹏Ò｡)

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

Lots of soft big sweaters and jeans. Nice neutral colors.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

Jiangshi x Jianghshi action. Sad boi hours with Song Lan and getting Song Lan to be more hopeful.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Jiang Cheng x Wen Ning. Ew, no. The guy literally just old Wei Wuxian to kill him again, had the audacity to blame Wen Ning for everything wrong in his life while helping to kill off Wen Ning's remaining family.

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

I cannot tell a lie and despise 98% of all pairs for him. Best to say I have no good answer on this one lol.

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

Wei Wuxian! The amount of effort Wei Wuxian goes to make sure Wen Ning realizes he isn't anyone's servant and doesn't owe Wei Wuxian anything because they are simply friends.

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

Jiang Cheng? If it can be called a relationship. Cunt owes Wen Ning a few licks on his boots too.

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

Again Wei Wuxian. The man made sure they stood on equal ground!

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

I haven't written for Wen Ning honestly. But I have had general ideas to explore his thoughts and introspections because he really is just such a kind mellow man for the lot in life he was given.

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

Conflating his loyalty to Wei Wuxian as romantic. I feel like much of Wen Ning's own ideals are dropped to say he was in love with Wei Wuxian

23. Favorite picture of this character?

His Birthday promo art

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

Qiqi from Genshin Impact, and Prim from The Hunger Games.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

Also, still too precious for this earth, someone spoil him now please

[bestworstcase]

I found your blog via your post about yang and strength, got really interested, and then I ended up reading through a loooooot of your rwby commentary, and now I’ve got a question for you, if you don’t mind: Is it okay to want Penny to come back? I’ve read a lot of your analysis of her story arc and character, specifically that giant post you wrote about her in november 2021. i um, have definitely been guilty of wanting her to come back a whole lot. I’ve definitely done some frantic and outlandish theorycrafting to cope, but also I really do see what you mean about how her atlas arc is meant to be a tragic ending, so I don’t know how to reconcile my appreciation for the show’s story with my desire of just… really wanting to see her again?

This isn’t me asking you about whether or not she might come back because I’ve made my peace with whatever happens, this is just me asking if like… am I entitled or ungrateful for missing her so much that it makes me cry when such a wonderful story is being told in the show as a whole?

of course it’s okay!!!

the fact that her death had such a profound and lasting emotional impact on you speaks to the strength of the storytelling and the care that the writers poured into her character. tragedy aspires to incite the feelings you’re describing for the purpose of emotional release; catharsis is the whole reason tragedy exists at all.

you’re not just allowed to cry—you’re meant to. you’re supposed to care deeply that she’s gone. it matters. the story grieves for her and it’s inviting you to grieve too. when ruby breaks down over losing penny, it’s okay to be right there with her emotionally.

wanting her to come back or hoping that she might is a natural aspect of that feeling. theorizing—even in a grasping at straws kind of way—is a natural way to process that feeling. so is writing or reading “fix-it” fic or other kinds of AUs where penny survives or returns or never endured that ordeal in the first place. inherent to catharsis is the idea that letting painful feelings out is not only good but necessary for emotional well-being.

(you are also under no obligation to like every creative decision a story makes and it is entirely okay to feel like penny dying in v8 lessened your enjoyment of the story overall, if that’s how you feel. by no means do you owe it to any story to like everything about it just because it’s written well.)

what is entitled is the attitude held by a specific subset of hardcore penny 3.0 theorists that penny’s death was something bad that the writers did to the audience that they now have an obligation to “fix” or “make right”—often accompanying a sentiment along the lines of “why even bring her back if they were just going to kill her off?” and dismissal of her entire presence in the atlas arc as “just fanservice,” sometimes with the implication that the writers took advantage of penny fans only to stab them in the back.

the entitlement comes from the failure or refusal to recognize that the writer’s room does not revolve around what penny fans would like to happen (or indeed fans of any other character) and a narrative turn that upsets you is not something that the writers have done to hurt you. it’s entitled to act like the writers owe it to you to bring a character back to life, which was the general tenor of a lot of high-profile penny 3.0 discourse back in 2021 although the attitude has mellowed since then.

(& just in case: if you, personally, were in the category of penny fans who felt outraged or hurt back then and wanted to demand that the writers make it up to you by reviving her, and you’ve since reflected on those feelings and moved on from them to—as you say—make peace with whatever the story has planned, That Is Also Okay, and you should not beat yourself up over it. this is not something you need to feel guilty about.)

as for how to reconcile appreciating the story for what it is and still feeling like crying when you think about penny… i mean this completely in earnest, even if you’ve never written anything before in your life, try writing a fanfic where she lives or finds her way back or her friends manage to save her. not just reading or looking at fanart—i do think that there is really something to be said for making your own fanworks. writing or drawing gives you a degree of control over what happens in your story or artwork that you can’t get anywhere else and that can be a very comforting outlet when mourning a character.

you’re okay.

[my-castles-crumbling]

My opinion of you? Hmmmm. Well honestly, my opinion of you… really fucking good.

I dunno how comfortable you are with compliments so i’m putting a little warning here; compliments incoming :)

Firstly, you are an awesome writer. Like genuinely. Plus it’s so impressive that you write/post those microfics everyday, it’s serious (sirius haha) dedication, and most ppl wouldn’t have it in them to keep a routine like that. 

Two, you have legit saved people. People here felt safe enough to ask you for help, and from all i’ve seen, you’re damn good at giving advice. 

Plus I saw that one anon you answered where you told the person not to admit they cheated if it’d get them in more trouble than they deserve, and I salut you for that. (I remember you also told them that cheating is wrong and mostly don’t do it- don’t worry I got the right message). 

Anyway, my point is, there aren’t many places people feel safe enough to talk about their problems or insecurities or even dangers. Especially on the internet. So you’ve made a really good community here. You should be proud. 

But we’re doing full honesty right? So honestly, I think that it seems like sometimes you don’t have enough faith in yourself. 

I mean your fics are amazing, but also, they’re fucking free and a gift to the fandom. So you shouldn’t feel the need to meet anyone’s demands or be good enough for anyone but yourself. 

And here, you have helped so many people, I understand insecurity is a part of living, but maybe you don’t get how helpful your blog is. Whenever I come on here, you’ve posted a microfic or made a marauders joke or truly helped someone (with annoyingly good advice btw, i’m an adult and yet NO WHERE NEAR as mature, so good on u), and it’s soothing. You’re soothing.

Give yourself credit, is what i’m saying. 

You’re allowed to feel proud that you help people, proud that people love your writing, and ignore anyone who’s an asshole cause they’re dumb anyway.

And don’t forget that you don’t owe anyone anything. You don’t owe anyone a fic, or a tumblr post or an anon answer or even (within reason) kindness. You’re being generous with your time and your kindness by helping people. And while obviously that’s a good thing, you shouldn’t feel pressured to do so. 

Wait let me rephrase that- anyone who pressures you to do so is a bad person and should be strongly ignored. 

You don’t have to apologise for not wanting to post or be on social media. And anyone who cares should value that you’re taking time for yourself. 

Plus, and sorry if it’s weird to bring up your like, real life, but I think you’re probably a really great teacher. I didn’t have many people who believed in me growing up and you seem like someone who believes in people. And that’s what matters most. 

(Plus all teachers are criminally underpaid so like- good for you sticking with a half shitty job- though then again all jobs are half shitty) 

Also, and in this day and age this is a truly high compliment, you don’t seem like you’ve ever sent hate. 

You just have that vibe. You know… nice :)

So yes, that is my opinion of you.

Also, random question, how much gory stuff in films can you take? Usually i’m pretty alright, but I watched a pretty gross film earlier and it reminded I can’t watch everything gory. 

So yeah… that’s all ❤️

Hi, um...I am SO sorry, my my allergies are terrible and I seem to be sweating from my eyes....nothing to see here...😭😭😭😭

Thank you. Genuinely. I have honestly been struggling a fair amount lately, so notes like this make a much bigger difference than you would think <3

As far as films, I'm alright with gore. I actually LOVE horror films, but I prefer psychological horror and horror based on East Asian legends.

Thank you again <3 <3 <3

[messydiabolical]

Just saw a poll about what in fanfics you dislike the most and it reminded me about a specific plot line I see in Thane fics a fair bit and, well I have a lot to say. I've thought about writing this before but I chickened out tbh, I hate getting into discourse generally. I feel the need to preface that this is personal opinion and feelings, no fic authors owe readers a damn thing, and you can write what you damn well want to! Just to make that abundantly clear. This is also not written with any one fic/author in mind, this aint some vague posting attack on any person in particular. It is a trope I have seen occur on multiple occasions with Thane in particular, and one that gives me a lot of feelings. I bloody LOVE a Thane lives AU. That's my jam, no doubt. It's a cathartic, soothing balm for me. And how you choose to get there can vary massively and I love that too. I would say that I prefer when his motivation to persue treatment is based in wanting to live for Kolyat and especially for himself, and not just because his love of Shepard. And while they break my heart, I also think stories that follow canon, or divert from canon but still have him die, are also super important and I applaud the writers who go there, because ouch. Disability and terminal illness are difficult, real subjects and having that representation is so important. I completely understand why there are people who dislike Thane lives. So to the thing I really dislike: nothing makes my stomach drop faster than the disregarding or removal of Thane's bodily autonomy/consent on his own health. They tend to go like this: Thane has decided not to persue any potential treatments, collapses/is rendered otherwise unable to have his say on the matter past his already stated wants, and while unconscious Shepard overrides his DNR wishes and has him given life saving or extending treatments. He wakes up and is upset at Shepard, but ultimately forgives or even thanks them for making that decision for him (basically saying that he was 'wrong' and Shepard was 'right'.) I do think this can be written in an interesting, character study way. There's also those grey area tangents: For example, what if the treatment suddenly becomes available after he's already unable to give consent, one that he was not aware of. Or what if the source of the treatment changes; before he was against a transplant because it would mean taking from another drell, but suddenly cloning or something else becomes available? etc. Perhaps such plot lines have been explored and I've missed them, because unfortunately after reading a handful of the type where he is just wholesale disregarded by Shepard if I get even a whiff of this kind of plotline I abandon the reading. As for why this does not sit well with me at all? It creates a situation where you have to basically make out that Thane was somehow in the wrong for ever feeling that way, that his acceptance of his terminal illness is bad, his motivations wrong. Again, something that can be explored- but not by just wholesale disregarding and overriding him then later teaching him why he was 'wrong'. We are getting into the very murky area of "if a person is depressed/mentally compromised by trauma/their past enough, they are no longer able to make decisions on their own health, this is for their own good'. And- yikes. Red alert. Because that is a story that needs to be handled with so much care, and it absolutely should not be used as a temporary source of angst to further a fucking romance plot. I think this hits hard for me especially as a disabled person who has had to deal with my fair share of medical fuckery. I'm also neurodivergent and have mental health issues. Advocating for myself is something I have had to battle many a time. Anyway hoo I had that one pent up hey? Again, I hope no one feels personally attacked by this. It's my own ick, one that might resonate with some, one that others might completely disagree with.

[mushiemellows]

2, 15, 17 for the writer ask game!! love your work <3

2.       Is there a least favorite character or title you dislike writing for?

I have some semi-extensive Jinbei writing on the horizon that I’m not feeling totally confident in. I also am writing some Sanj atm, and I’ve never totally felt confident in how I write him (tho I’ve been practicing and I subjectively think I’m improving?) I also sort of abandoned the Frankenstein fic, I might get back to it one day but it’s ultimately sad and thinking about it makes me feel even sadder to work on. We’ll see how it all pans out, I’d like to return to it one day because I still know where I want the story to go, I just don’t know if I’m in the place to write it yet. But I appreciate what it meant when I wrote it back over new years/xmas. Lots of things. I tend to get really harsh on myself, even tho it’s kind of silly. This is all just playing dolls. I don’t need to be so upset with the things I make, idk. And yet, I do.

15.   What made you start to write fanfiction/stories?

Hm. This is complicated to answer, I guess. Like I guess I’ve been thinking about fic since I was an 8year old kid realizing I could build off of stories in my brain before I went to bed. I used to feel a lot of shame about my desire to write those stories down, though. I was made fun of a lot when I was young for it. When I was in my early 20s I was in a fandom that was hot at the time where I wrote some pretty successful one shots (relatively, idk if they have longevity tho) but I didn’t sit down and start fully typing out words like I have become known for until ~6 months ago. I put out a crap fic I’ve since deleted because I was so ashamed of how bad it was, but it lead to me writing SRH so i can’t be totally mad at it either. And one day, I’ll look back on writing 315k of anime smut as a stepping stone to the next thing after it. It’s just a matter of time and perspective, I know that. I owe a lot to the terrible stories I made up in my brain when I was eight. I owe a lot to the terrible stories I made up in ao3 20 years after that. One day, I’ll look back on this phase too, hopefully. Stories pop into my brain in a way that is easier than words in real life. I like crafting narratives, I’ve fallen in love with the process these last few months. It’s always felt natural to me, and I’m so happy to finally pursue it. It’s freeing.

17.   If there’s one thing you could tell your readers, what would it be?

So I answered this one already, but I’m going to add to it. Oh my god, get weird. We’re in such a fecking different era of art creation, you need to make something weird and off putting to the masses. Find your niche, have confidence with the weird shit you’re into. Every time I get down about like, AI and bullshit like that, I think about the history of the camera and its relationship to painting. When science realized it could capture real life with more “technical precision” with the camera, portraiture and painting didn’t end. It adapted, we got Impressionism, expressionism, surrealism. Poison the content machine with unusable trash. Make something so weird that a computer couldn’t even dream of creating. Get wild, get funky, get freaky, fuck it get a little kinky. You’re never going to appease everyone. Maximum palatability isn’t the point. Be a fucking weirdo on main. Soak it up. Lean in twice as hard. Double down. Freak people out. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Tysm for all of the love 💜💜💜💜

[forest-hashira]

i need to be honest with you guys

i really don't want to be Like That and say that i've succumbed to the whole "my writing is worthless if it isn't popular etc. etc." mindset but like. i think i kind of have. i know that my writing has worth even if nobody reads it, and for a long time i was fine with not getting much attention on my works. i was happy with what i was writing, i didn't really care if anyone else read it, because i liked it, and that's what mattered.

and then i started writing Noble Blood, not just a bunch of mini fics that had no worldbuilding and very little plot.

Noble Blood is very precious to me. i've never put as much time and effort into a project that has actually turned into anything beyond some very vivid mental images and a handful of bullet points in a google doc. Noble Blood means so fucking much to me. and as much i desperately wish it didn't, the fact that it has not done well over the last three months has really, really hurt me. i know that engagement isn't everything, and i know it doesn't signify how good or valuable my writing is, but it's also not wrong for me to wish that people would interact with it in some way, because without those interactions there's no way for me to know if anybody's even reading it at all, much less if they're enjoying it.

and beyond that, i feel like whatever little niche i may have had before is gone, or at least expanded to the point that i feel like i've been pushed out. i don't want to make anyone feel bad, so i'm definitely not going to name any names, and again i really don't want to make anyone feel bad or like i'm attacking them. that is not my intention. i am just trying to be honest about what's been going on in my head lately. but i have writer friends who used to mostly/only write smut with little to no plot and are now branching into fics with lots of worldbuilding and plot and little to no smut, and i'm happy for them! i'm glad people are comfortable and confident enough to do that, and i am more than excited to read those things as they're published, genuinely i am. but i feel like that was what i had going for me, what made what i was writing stand out from everything else. and now i feel like i don't have that anymore.

i'm not entirely certain i know where i'm going with this, or what i'm trying to say. but this has been weighing heavy on me for a while. i don't want this to come across as me whining because my stuff hasn't gone viral, or begging/guilting people into reading my works, or anything like that, and i don't want anyone else to feel like i'm upset with them or think that i feel like they don't deserve the attention their works get, or anything like that, because i don't think or feel that way; i'm genuinely so happy that people are exploring things that interest them and are enjoying writing those ideas. i just wish it was working out for me like it's working out for them.

this isn't a post to say i'm quitting writing forever (i don't think i could even if i tried to), and it's not me saying i'm going to delete everything i've posted and disappear, because i'm not going to do either of those things (though i can't say the thought never crosses my mind). I am just struggling to find a reason to keep doing what i'm doing, because my disappointment and frustration with how poorly everything i post here does has now been bleeding into the enjoyment i usually get from writing, and it's making writing feel Very Unpleasant. i don't want to quit but i don't know what to do anymore.

to anyone who does read & interact with my fics, mutuals especially, i will never be able to thank you enough for your support. it seriously means the world to me, and i owe you an eternal debt of gratitude. i love all of you from the bottom of my heart.

if you read this far, thank you for listening to my (probably pointless) rambling, and i'm sorry for taking up so much of your time. i hope life is treating all of you well, and that you're taking care of yourselves as best you can. i love you guys 💜

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

Did you watch that Niall reading fan fic video? Did you watch it to the very end? After he finished reading the fic, he laughed and said "that was some online Tumblr shit right there"...yeah that was dissapoiting to hear. I'm not a writer or have my own Tumblr blog but I took offense to this. To just laugh like that at your own fans, the ones who take the time to write the fics and those who take the time to read them. Not ok.

It is OK to laugh at people anon - it's a very common human reaction to the world. I'm sure you have laughed at a lot of people in your life. Fandom culture also involves a lot of laughing at people. You may not like that Niall laughed at tumblr - but that doesn't make it not OK.

I do think it's actually worth asking the question - what principle could possibly make Niall laughing at fans wrong in a moral sense? (As opposed to a reasonably normal thing to do that people can like and not like as they see fit). If people want to share their answers I'd be really interesting in hearing them. But I am going to take this question perhaps overly seriously (particularly when my basic response to the video is that it's pretty trivial), because I do think it's important to articulate and maintain the difference between 'I don't like this' and 'this is wrong'.

One of my basic beliefs is that saying something is wrong , as opposed to just something you don't like personally, is a pretty big deal. That a moral code is something pretty serious, it's necessary, obviously, but invoking morality just to express preferences has a quite significant history of doing incredible damage.

There are I think two basic strain of answers people might give to justify the idea that there's something wrong in a broad sense with what Niall did. The first is that it's wrong for Niall to laugh at fans, because they support his career in some way. That there is some sort of obligation or boundaries that a musician owes to fans that they don't owe to other people, beyond the contractual obligations of things they agree to do.

I actually think that's a deeply fucked up and controlling worldview that must be actively opposed. You can't buy control over another human being, no matter how much you stream. Most musicians have very complicated thoughts and feelings about fans, because fandom is a weird and complicated relationship. It's up to individual musicians to navigate that however works best for them, including laughing at people.

The other broad justification comes from some sort of analysis of society and one that argues that in some way Niall has power over fans and therefore it's wrong for him to laugh at them. My other anon phrased it as 'punching down'.

I think it' worth spelling out all the power Niall doesn't have over fans, he can't fire people, or evict them, or deprive them of ways of getting their needs met in any other way. He doesn't have any structural power to evaluate people - like teachers do. He can't grant or withhold necessary services from people. He can't deprive people of their liberty or cause people to be deprived of their liberty. He has no special access to violence. I think it's worth explicitly acknowledging the many ways people have real power over other people to put these discussions in context.

When fans suggest that other people have power over them and therefore it's wrong to mock them - they never mean any of these actual power structures that shape people's life. They usually mean something much more amorphous - it's a logic like 'fans are mostly women, therefore any mockery of fans is mockery of women, therefore its wrong'. (I think it's worth noting that a focus on fans as a category of people who should not be mocked, is very different from a formulation that suggested that particular forms of mockery were based in misogynist ideas and spelled out what they were. I would have a lot more time for something that framed this as making fun of women's sexual desire and expression. But I don't think that's how the discussion has been framed).

There is a real tendency within fandom to cast fans as a group of people who are inherently powerless and whom any form of criticism is wrong. This comes alongside a complete denial of the power in numbers and the ways that fans can and do exert power over people through their numbers. It is very tempting to position ourselves (both individually and collectively) as someone who can only ever be harmed, but can't do any harm to others. But it is a temptation that absolutely must be resisted - it is an anathema to solidarity and it is also an anathema to building strong relationships and treating other people as fully human.

One of the reasons I'm personally so resistant of the idea that fans are a group of people who must be protected and can easily be harmed - is because I see such a deep vein of denial within fandom about fans ability to harm. In fact if a family member, someone they're pretend to date, or someone who has interacted with 1D in any form in the world, says that they've been harmed by the number of people who have responded to them and the things that they've said, fandom's response is to treat this as an unreasonable attack of someone who has power over them - even if that's in no way true.

There may be something I'm missing - if anyone has an explanation for an underlying principle why they think it's not OK that Niall did a segment that contained an element of laughing at a culture that was built by fans I'd be interested to hear it.

But in the meantime I'm going to advocate for there being a difference between 'I don't like this' and 'this is not OK'. There are many reasons people might dislike that video of Niall - but that doesn't mean it's not OK.

[udunie]

“It was trying on the bones it collected like a magpie trying to decorate a nest.” - I got actual CHILLS that line really got me, such a good new chapter nini!! You’re a really natural horror writer, it’s obvs super gross what you’re writing but I’m also fascinated, it’s such a visceral description that I can’t stop reading!

I also wanted to say, I’m glad you said what you said about feeling pressure to finish or continue old fics. You absolutely don’t owe anyone anything, we’re already exceptionally treated by your writing and all the fics you’ve given us, and I do hope you feel like you can continue writing because you WANT to, not because of the pressure to constantly make new stuff or finish off old stuff. You’re an exceptional writer, I’ve been a fan for a long while, and I’m grateful for every little tidbit you want to share! You don’t owe your audience anything, we’re just glad we get what we do, so thank you for being so talented and i hope you feel able to share whatever you want to no matter what it is with us <3

Nonnie, thank you so much for your lovely words, I'm happy you're enjoying the fic so far! (well, as much as it can be enjoyed lol)

I'm actually having a lot of fun with it, which is hilarious considering that I've never watched a horror movie in my life lol

I'm waaaaay too chickenshit to watch anything even moderately scary/gross - but I do sometimes read the plot on wikipedia if I'm intrigued about a horror movie 🤣

I'm working on the next chapter right now, so if any of you guys want to talk about what you would like to see/what parts of the fic you like etc I would be very happy to hear it!

And thank you for being so understanding, I love to share stuff with you guys, cause you're all awesome and lovely and it feels a little easier when I know I can take my time...

[jtargaryen18]

Wait,I just saw an ask you answered about Waves That Beat on Heaven's Shore,for real? Seriously? You will continue it in 2024? It's 1st January already where I live as I was reading that and honestly it's the best news I could've ever read this New Year. I miss Waves so much,you have no idea ❤ I smiled,I giggled,I blushed,got butterflies in my stomach and I cried over Waves 💔 It's just so,so beautiful 😢❤ It's probably my favourite story ever and I'm so grateful to find it in my lifetime. I love it more than any romance/drama books I've ever read,they don't compare. AHIAR would be my number 2 favourite. I've probably re-read it more than 20 times. I even tried to "continue" it,in my personal notes,that I will never put out or have anybody read it except for myself (don't worry,I know that's wrong since the fic is yours,it's your work and property),like putting my own imagination and thoughts on how the story will continue,think of it as fanfiction of a fanfiction. And honestly,it's shit compared to your gift for writing. Trying to come up with suitable plots in my personal fanfiction of Waves made me realize it's actually really hard to write a story and even harder to write great ones and it made me appreciate writers like you more 🙏🏼 No pressure,as we all understand that real life always comes first no matter what. Only we ourselves know how busy we are in each of our personal lives'. Hell,I was busier in 2023 than I had been in 2022 or previous years,and it'll probably be busier and packed for me in 2024. You don't owe anyone anything and like someone already said to you here,no one's sponsoring or paying you,it's art and you should enjoy what you're doing,instead of feeling like you're pressured to do it ❤

And like the Waves anon said,even if you can't continue it,that's okay too ❤ Like the Waves anon,it'll be my 2023 Holidays gift wish as well. Even if you can't,I'll still love your other works and will keep an eye out for your future works ❤ Thank you so much for everything! ❤ For all the adventures you brought us through and all the feelings you gave us through your amazing stories! ❤ I really am grateful to find you and blessed myself with your talented writing 🙏🏼 Happy New Year to you and your family! ❤ Have a blessed New Year and may all your wishes and dreams come true in 2024 ❤ All the best and all the love in the world for you ❤❤❤

First of all, Happy New Year. 💕 I hope 2024 is good to you.

This note had me tearing up. It really did. Thank you for this. I mean it. 💕💕💕 And it resonated with me so much because...

You read correctly. I am picking Waves back up. I got sick over the holiday at the end of the year. I was there with the laptop after we got the kids down and I knew I wasn't going to be able to sleep (cough). I went through all my files and I found the next chapter I'd started for Waves, so long ago. I really got upset at myself because after I read that, I went back to my notes. The outline. I love the story because it lets us keep up with Steve and his girl from Rage. I also have this twist in Waves that I was really proud of and I want to write it, damn it. So this is the year we're going to do it. 🙏

Also I wanted to say, don't dismiss your own writing so easily. I'll bet you're a good writer and I hope to get to read your work someday. 💕

Thank you so SO much for this. From the bottom of my heart, thank you 💕💕💕

[zationao3]

Hey there! I'm fond of Zathursday, but as a (fake) writer I feel the urge to have a chapter out as soon as it's done. I always think: what if something happens to me and the one people who was enjoying my story is left on pending forever and ever? 😳

So my question is: what are the pros and cons of weekly updates versus out-as-soon-as-it's-done?

First of all, "Zathursday", I love that! 😆💖 Secondly, don't put yourself down! If you've written a story/poem/etc. you're a writer, period 🥰 Thirdly, thank you for asking me this! You made me feel very appreciated! 😍 (and kinda cool 😎)

As for your question, I suppose the pros and cons are different for different people but I'll gladly give you my thoughts on the matter! (this got long so I added a keep reading line, sorry lol)

Pros/cons for weekly posting: One of the cons is definitely what you're talking about. Like, what if I have started a multi-chaptered affair and then suddenly something happens that prevents me from finish posting it? Me personally, I have given my beta access to my account so she can finish posting for my readers' sake but that might not be an option for everyone so it's definitely something to take into account. Another con can be time management, if you feel like you want to be consistent with e.g. a weekly update, because life can happen. You might not always have the time to write and proofread (and/or send to a beta) and this can mess with your deadlines. A way to circumvent this can be to try and be at least one chapter ahead, if possible, but there's still of course the possibility that your posting date catches up to you. This can sadly create self-imposed stress that can be detrimental to creativity and can be discouraging to actually finish that WIP you have been longing to write.

On the pro side, that last con can actually be a good thing, depending on what kind of writer you are. Some people work better with deadlines hanging over them, so knowing that you "have to" post on a certain day might be what pushes you to finish (I put "have to" it in quotation marks because it's important to know that you're supposed to be doing this for fun, and most probably for free, and you owe no one anything, you should first and foremost write for you 💖) Another pro when it comes to posting weekly, in my opinion, is definitely that you'll have something to look forward to each week. There's a sense of accomplishment in knowing you managed to get that chapter out this week too, and if you're lucky you'll get affirmation in the form of kudos/hits/comments and that feels great! You can of course get those from fics you have already finished posting and that are years old, but it's always fun to possibly have some interaction each week. Also, depending on what kind of writer you are, it can be nice to have reader input while you write, which you can get from comments sometimes. People can guess on what happens next, and you can feel encouraged by what they write in comments. This isn't always the case of course, some writers prefer to write in solitude and that's okay too 🥰

Pros/cons for posting immediately:

On this I have less expertise since I don't exactly to that but I'll put in my two cents anyway lol

One con that I can think of is that if you wanna stay consistent and build a fanbase based on a reputation of being reliable with your output, it's easier to do that when you post on a regular basis (weekly/monthly or what suits you). If you post as soon as you're done, you might run into the problem of having large gaps of time when you don't have anything to post (most probably because that's when you're writing your next piece) and if you're unlucky, readers will lose interest and move on to find that consistent gratification somewhere else. This is of course not really a con unless you care about readers, but I mention it because from your question I feel like you do take them into account. And again, depending on what kind of writer you are, you might work better or worse without a deadline, even if that deadline is something you've made up yourself, so that might be on the con side too.

Conversely, a pro is of course if you hate deadlines and just want that instant gratification for yourself. There's after all really nothing like the feeling of accomplishment of posting a finished piece, or finish posting something longer lol And of course, a pro is what you yourself mentioned: you'll get the whole thing out there before anything can happen to your work (we all know computers are fickle...)

In the end it's all about what suits you, what makes you feel good in your writing process. And of course, just because you start posting weekly, there's no saying you can't go back to posting immediately! (and vice versa) There is no right or wrong way, as long as you're having fun while writing 🥰 Sorry this turned into an essay... I hope I didn't complicate things too much lol Again, thank you for asking my opinion! I wish you luck in your future writing and don't hesitate to contact me again if you want to, my DMs are always open 😄💖

[luveline]

“I really hope I can do better by you all and get it together”

You do well by everyone when you take care of yourself, for however long that takes. Not when you calm down, not when you summon the energy to post all the time, not when you answer every single person that is demanding something of you. You are an incredible writer and I love everything you write, but those stories wouldn’t exist without you. You’re what matters the most, and your mental health, life, responsibilities, future, and relationships are what matter the most. Spreading yourself too thin serves no one, and it especially doesn’t serve you. You need to rest and be tender with yourself, and be picky with who or what gets your energy, don’t even worry about Tumblr.

The people that are hateful or demanding are the same people who are talking during a movie or making a ton of noise at the library. They’re just the loudest people in the room because they lack awareness or they’re straight up desperate for attention. They know you’re sweet and kind to everyone so they pick on you because they’re weak willed. It’s not a reflection of you, simply their inability to be satisfied with themselves. You’re wonderful, and you come back whenever you feel comfortable enough to do so. Even if that means never!

You’re a delight, and I wish nothing but peace for you 💖

I will try to answer this like one line at a time but it made me cry a little bit and I'm frazzled.

Firstly, you made me feel much better. And like I know it sounds silly for me to say this but it's invaluable to me. I don't know if you're saying this because you think I want to hear it, but I (maybe shamefully???) Really really do want to hear it, and it's a unbelievable generosity in my eyes of you to take the time but also the heart maybe to have said this to me.

I really do take care of myself. I think, pathetically, that this is the thing people ask me to do most often. Genuinely and especially from my lovely friend Lu, I think I'm always being reminded to take care of myself and people might not believe me but I do— I'd argue I'm too nice to myself because I'm lazy and I eat too many biscuits after tea and I take extremely long and unnecessary showers, I'm selfish in weird ways and I really don't do things I don't wanna do (to my own detriment sometimes) but I really am taking are of myself, so if that's doing right then I glad for it.

It's really odd to see it and it really did make me cry to think these stories can't exist without me. I'm not delusional I know both the redundancies and the importance of fic and tumblr especially like it's just a website but its the small slice of community I've managed to carve out here that is important to me. Never in my life have I experienced something like this and I know how valuable it is to me even if it isn't to others, so though I know you're right that spreading myself too thin won't serve anybody, I really would regret not fostering my connections here, and also I'm dumb and I don't want people to forget about me.

As for hateful and demanding, I really do agree with you. I think it's a disservice to other people to pretend I deserve some of the shit I've been sent, and you're right that they're loud. I don't know about sweet and kind but I do know it's usually an attention thing or personal hill to die on, I really know it, and I'm gonna try my best to just not pay attention because there's bigger fish to fry, like thanking you for being an angel.

I really appreciate you and your ask. It is never lost on me the pure untouched kindness that goes into trying to make others feel better, especially when there's no skin in the game and you won't get anything out of this. You're really speaking up out of the goodness of your heart and I love and owe you for it, thank you for being so kind, for doling out some load bearing advice that I'll be resting my weight on for a while, and for the sweet compliments. I really hope I can be back more often because this shit is breaking my heart lol

[drk-brain]

some thoughts on writing, or, "how my favorite fic (of my own) changed my brain chemistry"

Rehashing a little ramble from elsewhere for this, but I have a lot of thoughts and also how can I not link it everywhere I go all the time really?

Mind the rating and CWs in the tags (dubcon, discussion of depression, referenced self-harm) -

So, this fic ruined my life (affectionate). I set out to write a small, contained oneshot* about my wol's past relationship, it got out of hand, etc. But it really really did alter my brain lol

Not just in the form of wolnpc brainrot that grabbed me by the throat and never let go, not only because I set out to write something small and relatively meaningless that turned into something serious, but

It changed my approach to writing romance.

For those of you who don't know me: I spent a while as an acquiring editor for a fairly well known traditional romance publisher, and I am a romance writer, both in fanfic and elsewhere.

Now, within genre boundaries, Obsidian Heart is not a romance. It doesn't have a happy ending. The goal of the story isn't overcoming challenges to be together in the end. (It is effectively part one of a greater story that is genre-typical romance, though.)

Regardless, I will NEVER write explicit content the same as I used to after this. I knew the advice, I knew the rule. I helped other people shape their stories to this rule for years, and I made my living doing it. Explicit scenes in longer content (aka, not "porn without plot," which is absolutely valid and fun but not what I'm going for here) should theoretically all serve to further the plot or character development.

Obviously this isn't a hard and fast rule, and all writing advice should always be taken subjectively and with many grains of salt, but it applies to what I want to do with my writing, and also is something you'll find traditional publishers look for so that had a lasting effect on me.

I have never felt like I succeeded in this rule in my own writing to such a degree as I did with OH. I've done it to the point where yeah things would be conspicuously missing if those scenes were deleted, they aren't just there to be sexy or pass time, but I am immensely proud of the degree to which that is the case in this fic.

There is absolutely zero intent for the explicit scenes in here to be sexy. They are meant exclusively to illustrate characterization and related progression. From "this is an arrangement of cold convenience," to "uh oh feelings," to "these are troubled people for whom 'uh oh feelings' is not enough to overcome the core conflict and make a relationship work."

And I am immensely proud of it. It had the side effect of infecting me with the plague and now I am writing more of them constantly, but really.

The way it all feels so "almost," the promise of things that could have been. The way it makes me (and them) confront the actuality that love alone does not guarantee a happy ending. Love and hope alone do not move mountains, and you can have the best intentions and still hurt the people you care about.

I love it dearly, and I will never approach writing the same again. It taught me a lot and I owe it a lot, and it's very close to my heart as a result.

On a less analytical note, it also just has some of my favorite passages of my own writing, and I really love playing with the "world sucks, nothing matters" sort of tone.

Now, I'm not one to stake value on stats. I find them fascinating but not in a "this affects me emotionally" way. If I were driven by numbers, I never would've committed to this pairing lol. So I'm not fussed about views or kudos or what have you. But I also think it's normal and human to want people to enjoy and engage with things you've created that you care about.

So yeah. It's a lower traffic tag ("rarepair" if you will) and it's plastered in CWs (for a reason!), but it is my favorite of my published writing. It's the thing I wish I could carry around and hand to people and say: if you like my writing, if you like me, if you want to do something for me or read one thing of mine, make it OH.