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boygiwrites · 9 months

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Harley D. Dixon 1

• Gen Tags. Found family, Daddy issues, Hurt and comfort, Gore.

• Summary. Harley D. Dixon is a tough yet sweet little girl who until the dead started eating the living, thought she had seen it all. Alongside a mismatched group of survivors in rural Georgia, Harley and her Dad are forced to leave their small life behind and learn how to survive all over again through the horrors of the apocalypse.

An amazing edit inspired by this story! (Cred to Cora_Line99) Harley D. Dixon's Pinterest Board! Harley D. Dixon's Playlist!

📖Chapter List.

❤️Cross-Posted from Ao3.

Author's Note. Here we gooo! Argh, I'm so excited.

I've been wanting to write something like this for a long, long time. I've read just about every 'Daryl has a daughter' story out there, and now I've finally got my own to share. I just love Daryl, and Daryl with a kid is a whole other thing. We all know he wouldn't be the perfect parent, so you bet I'm gonna play right into that. He's gonna swear, he's gonna be strict, and he's gonna mess up. As for Harley (Yes, as in the motorcycle brand), I love her too. So ready to write her.

This story will cover the general plot of the show. To keep things fresh, I've made sure that almost every canon scene has undergone at least one small change. Plus, of course, many new scenes. Occasionally, I'll make bigger changes just to keep you on your feet! Nobody's safe! I'm also gonna be expanding on all the characters. And lastly — FOUND FAMILY! Piles and piles and piles of found family, eventually. I live for found family.

Please enjoy reading! :)

My Uncle Merle died today.

I'm sitting in a crinkly green camping chair, watching embers die.

I don't wanna think about my Uncle right now, so I think about something else.

The fire was built last night by Glenn and Morales. Then Lori came along this morning very quietly and made it alive again with logs and wads of notebook paper. Thinking about facts is easy. It's like sucking on a plain candy that tastes like nothing. There's a navy-blue blanket across my lap with three holes in it, perfect for nibbling, poking, and ripping. Dale gave it to me when the cold settled in this afternoon. He told me he reckons it's around June, as he covered my shoulders, which used to be his niece's birthday.

He says she looked a little like me. That means she's dead. So many people are dead, now.

A thin log in the campfire cracks and tumbles over after trying to stay upright all morning. I hope I don't look like that log.

I can hear Officer Rick approaching. My stomach becomes a stone.

I can tell it's Rick because he's got one of them power walks that you can hear coming from a mile away, which I think makes him pretty stupid. He's loud, and loud is dangerous, and dangerous is stupid. My Dad's not like that. Unless he's angry or running, ain't nobody hearing my Dad coming; especially not no squirrels.

He's almost as big as my Grandpappy Dixon, who people used to say was as big as a house, and he wears super heavy boots from a hunting store near our house — but he's still not loud, or dangerous, or stupid. Not like Officer Rick.

"Hey, Harley."

I think I hate Officer Rick. I think I hate everyone.

And I think I might be crying now, too. I focus on twirling the blanket strings around my finger so I have something very simple to think about, which is that it hurts real bad when I twist it tight. I see Rick crouch down in front of me. He takes a while to say anything else, and it's prolly 'cause he's tryna be real careful, so he don't make me cry even more.

If my Dad weren't out hunting, he'd prolly slap Rick and everybody else that's tried badgering me today dead for tryna do his job for him. I feel like, just by sitting here, I'm disobeying him. Rick ain't my Daddy.

"We, uh..." He clears his throat. "Me and Lori, and some other folks are uh... Well, we're all a little worried about you, honey, okay?"

I imagine a small group of folks gathered by the RV right now, watching me and Rick; wondering if he's gonna be the one to get through to me.

I'm worried for when my Daddy comes back. When he finds out about Uncle Merle, he's gonna be fuming. He's gonna be like one of them cartoon characters with the bright red faces and the smoke comin' outta their ears, stomping all around, and he's prolly gonna kill somebody. It's prolly gonna be Rick. He always told me cops are bastard liars, and that they can't help us.

I look up at Rick. Yep, I've been crying.

Rick's all blurry, but I can still make out his ugly Sheriff's badge and his scary blue eyes and his frowning eyebrows that look like clenched fists, and I can tell he's been waiting to be the one to talk to me. I bet he thinks it makes him better than everyone else; better than my Uncle Merle, who he left to die just 'cause he ain't like him. I wanna kick Rick right in the face. I think he knows this, but he doesn't move.

"First off, I wanna say that I'm sorry about what happened to your Uncle Merle." Rick says all nice and gentle.

Nothin' happened to him.

It weren't no freak accident, which is what Uncle Merle used to say happened to my Momma.

Rick killed him.

"I know he meant a lot to you. And I'm sorry. If I had'a known he had a niece to come back to, maybe I woulda been a little wiser with my decision makin'. But Harley," He tilts his head and puts a hand on my knee for this part. "You gotta know, like I know, that your Uncle was a danger to us all."

There's a little angry parasite inside of me. It's been growing and growing ever since the group came back from Atlanta, and I couldn't find my Uncle Merle in the crowd. I've never noticed my Uncle Merle so much than when I realised he wasn't there. It was like there was the wrong amount of space left in the air and Rick was taking up the too much of it. Ever since the cars showed up, everything has been wrong, wrong, wrong.

Ever since Rick showed up.

"If I hadn't stepped in when and how I did," Rick says, "Your Uncle wouldda gotten us all in a lotta trouble."

Another log crumbles in the campfire. My finger aches and pulses around the string.

That hungry little parasite — hungry for Rick to hurt like I'm hurting, needing it more than anything — makes me tell him, "I wish he did." And again, because it feels good. Rick becomes even more blurry, as my voice makes an embarrassing hicking noise. "I wish you died."

I expect to be hit. That's what happens sometimes, when little girls don't know their place.

Tellin' adults I want them dead — That ain't my place. And I know it. I just don't care.

My Uncle Merle wasn't a danger, he was just Uncle Merle; Has been since I could talk. He used to feed me bits of his sandwich out on the deck back at home, like the tomato, 'cause he ain't like the taste. He used to fix my bike when it was broken. He used to make sure I was the first one to open presents at Christmas, and help me wrestle the wrapping when there was too much tape. He used to pull my wobbly baby teeth out for me and let me outside without shoes. He wasn't mean, or bad, or loud, or dangerous, or stupid; at least not always. He wasn't the one that got my Momma killed. He was good. And now he'd dead.

If someone had to die, I wish it had'a been Rick — Stupid, noisy, idiot Rick who ain't shed one single tear after what he done to my Uncle Merle.

I wanna get hit. I want him to hit me so bad that I'm allowed to hit him back.

"Okay." Rick says, and I can't breathe.

I feel like everything goes silent throughout camp, like the chairs and the cars and the people are all holding their breaths like I am. He actually looks a little sad, which feels really, really bad, because I wanna be angry.

"Okay. That's okay."

But as I think about my Uncle Merle, and the tomatoes, and my old bike, and what Christmas used to feel like, and my Daddy, and how he ain't even know about Merle yet, I realise I'm just really, really sad.

I can't even see Rick anymore, my eyes are so watery. My whole body hurts from being sad. I feel like I'm sick and I need to go to the doctor, but I don't even know what for. There aren't even any doctors here. Just two bastard liar cops, some campers, and a space where my Uncle Merle should be.

I think, after a while, Rick leaves.

My Dad still keeps his wallet.

It's in a backpack under his sleeping cot. He says that everything inside that bag will keep us alive some day, if we ever need to leave the quarry camp. He said I need to know exactly where it is so that I can grab it if he can't. He showed me everything the night we got here, because he forced me to, because it's important. The other kids don't learn stuff like this from their parents. It makes me feel smart. I'm in on a secret. He showed me the bug spray, which keeps our skin healthy from bug diseases, and he showed me the flashlight, which has two batteries and a big black button. He showed me the compass, the box of matches, the big knife, the little knife, the rope, and the map. It's like a Jenga tower. If we lose even one thing from the backpack; everything topples, and we die — I die. You gotta listen t'me, chicken. My Daddy's always been like this.

But the wallet made no sense.

We don't gotta pay taxes no more, like Merle said. I don't know what taxes are, except they're bad, and gone, and nobody liked them anyway. And I saw my Dad burn all his money in a campfire one night, so it can't be that.

It's the pictures, Dad told me. He flipped it open like a book, and we looked at 'em together on top of his sleeping bag. I felt like crying for a second because we forgot all my storybooks when we left our house, but Daddy hates it when I cry, so I dried up. Crying is for babies, and I'm a big girl. He showed me a photo of an actual baby, and after he touched the baby's face with his fingertip, he said the baby was me. I didn't think I could look like that. He stopped talking for a while. I listened to the cicadas in the trees to pass the time while he touched the photo. Then it was bedtime.

I'm looking at the photo now, waiting for him to get back.

I was a very pink baby. I was only the size of his forearm, which in the photo, hasn't been tattooed yet. The tattoo of my name is missing, which goes up his wrist in curly letters. Harley Davidson Dixon. It's the name of a motorcycle. The tattoo of the skull and the bleeding angel are missing, too. He's fixing my baby blanket around my chin. I guess he's been doing that since the day I was born. Every night, at least up until last week, my Dad tucks me into bed and sings me the same song. Hush little baby, don't say a word. Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird. I like his voice when he sings to me. Usually, he's yelling, or grumblin', but in those twenty seconds before I have to go to sleep, and nobody else is listening, he's softly whispering the lyrics to me, and touching on my ears and my cheeks. In the photo, he's crying down into his smiling mouth. That's something he doesn't do anymore.

The next photo is of us at the zoo. I know it was taken on one of the weekends I was at my Dad's house, because my Momma's not in this one. Just my Dad and two of his friends, I think, who are throwing rock star hands in the air. I'm wearing a black shirt with a videogame character on it that my Dad likes, and brown pants. I'm sitting on my Dad's hip as we pose in front of three giant elephants. My Dad's got a tiny purple backpack over his shoulder that makes him look sorta funny. It used to be mine. I'm looking at the elephant's long, silly-straw trunk as it tries to sniff us, but my Daddy's lookin' at me. I wish I remembered this day.

The third photo is a school photo with a swirly blue background. I remember this one. My Momma did my hair that day.

I know why he keeps his wallet, now. Just like how we need the bug spray, and the matches, and the rope, and the knives, and the map, and the flashlight to stay alive — I think my Dad needs these photos. They won't keep him warm or stop bugs from chewing on him, but he needs them.

I shove the wallet back where I found it, 'cause I'm not meant to be goin' through my Dad's things.

My Dad comes back while I'm vomiting under a tree.

At first, he doesn't see me. He calls for me to come get my little butt over there, so I can help him and Uncle Merle stew up some rabbits for dinner but when he hears me retch, he comes running over. I hear his crossbow drop and some more people call after him.

One minute, Lori and Amy are holding back my hair and patting my shoulders the best they can, and the next, my Daddy's forcing his way in. I'm rocking and I'm swaying like I'm on a life raft in the ocean, and I can hear Rick's voice and then Shane's and then Dale's. My Dad grabs the back of my neck and squeezes it, the way Lori and Amy would never know how to do, and tells me to lean forward some more. It works. I vomit up a chunky puddle of peaches and jerky into the dirt.

Then, I'm empty, and I'm crying — crying hard — into my Dad's lap.

"Someone wanna tell me what the Hell's goin' on here?" He snarls at whoever's around.

Feels like half the camp is here.

"How 'bout we all just try—" Shane's suggesting, but my Dad cuts him off.

"How 'bout ya'll just spit it out? And where the Hell's my brother?"

That makes me bury deeper into my Dad's legs, moaning and hiccupping. He puts a hand over my head. He's clocked the problem.

"Where the Hell's my damn brother?"

"Look, Daryl," Shane levels, "I'm just gonna come out and say it, alright? There was a problem in Atlanta."

My Dad's panting, now. "What fuckin' 'problem'?"

"Listen—"

"He dead?" Underneath me, my Dad's muscles are lurching and stopping, lurching and stopping, like he wants so much to just jump up and knock Shane to the ground, but he won't bring himself to leave me. The camp has gone completely silent.

Shane stammers. I've never heard Shane stammer. "We're— We're not sure."

The silence just keeps on goin' and goin' and goin', and somehow, it's even scarier than the yelling.

"There's no easy way to say this," Rick says, voice lowered. I wonder what my Dad looks like; if I was right about the cartoon thing.

Dad presses my head further into his stomach. "Who're you?"

"Rick Grimes."

"'Rick Grimes'." He spits, like it's an insult. It is. Bastard cop liar. "You got sum' you wanna tell me?"

"Your brother was a danger to us all." Lies Rick. "So I handcuffed him on a roof; Hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there."

After he says this, something in the air must have changed; something must have snapped without even makin' a sound, because Lori's whispering to me that I should follow her back to camp, like we're running out of time. She tries to pull me away, but I kick her; kick her hard, in the shin. She tries again. I realise she's trying to separate me from my Dad. Then, I realise he's sorta shaking. Lurching, stopping, lurching stopping. Silence, silence.

"Lemme get this straight." Dad whispers, and it's not the nice kind, like when he sings. "You're tellin' me that you handcuffed my brother to a roof."

Glenn's pulling at me now, too. Nobody else moves a muscle.

"And you left him there?!"

This time, he lurches and he doesn't stop. Glenn catches me as I'm flung from my Daddy's hip, and he passes me off to Lori as Dad goes lunging at Rick. The brown pebbles go flying up into the air. My Dad tackles Rick at the waist, and they crash into the leaves and the twigs, and his fist — The one with my birth date tattooed on each knuckle — goes smack, smack, smack, into Rick's cheek. There's yelling; scrambling. Glenn and Shane pull my Dad off of Rick, and that smacking sound stops. Dad beats Shane offa him and then, —

"Watch the knife!" T-Dog yells. Now there's a swishing sound, and grunting sounds, and I was right — My Daddy's gonna kill Rick.

My Daddy's killed someone before. He did it on accident, 'cause he got so angry that he didn't stop until the guy was dead and gone, which means that it was aggravated manslaughter. It was in the afternoon, just like it is right now, and I was playin' in the front yard in the sprinklers. My Dad and Uncle Merle were in the open garage, smoking and poking at their bikes with tools. Ronnie lived two trailers down. I was small, and easy to pick up, so I don't remember much, but Ronnie snatched me up right there in the yard. My Daddy says he was gon' take me. But he didn't let him. Ronnie got chased into the woods, and for two days, my Daddy and Uncle Merle searched for him. Then they beat him so bad his Momma ain't recognise him when the ambulance people dragged him out in a big black bag, and the cops took my Daddy away while the sun rose. I wasn't allowed to see him for four and a half years.

I need my Dad. Suddenly, I'm shrieking at him to stop, even though I want Rick dead so bad. By now, Shane's got my Dad in a chokehold up against a tree. Are he and Rick allowed to take my Daddy away? Lori and — I think that's Amy — are shushin' me, but I just keep hittin' on them and shouting.

I writhe in the dirt. "Stop! Daddy!"

"Damn pigs!" Dad growls. "You're stressin' out my kid, now! Lemme the Hell go!"

Shane laughs. "Nah, I think it's better if I don't." Then he turns to Lori, because what my Dad said is true. "Get Harley out of here."

I don't let her move me when she tries.

Dad struggles. "Chokehold's illegal, bastard!"

"You can file a complaint later." Shane scoffs. "We got all day here."

Rick steals my Dad's knife off the ground and gets in his face. His cheek is all red and purple. The fight's over. "What I did was not on a whim," He tells my Dad straight. "Your brother does not work and play well with others. I did what had to be done in the moment, to keep us all alive."

He's lyin'. He's lyin' again. My Uncle Merle chopped these people's firewood and brought them meat. He worked well.

My Dad shoots out a foot to try hit Rick in the crotch. He misses. Shane pushes his face harder into the tree.

"It's not Rick's fault." T-Dog holds up his hands, coming close. "It's mine. I had the key. I dropped it."

"You couldn't pick it up?" Dad sasses.

"It fell in a drain." T-Dog serves up this answer like it means anything at all. I hate him.

"If that's 'posed to make me feel better, it don't."

"Well, maybe this will." T-Dog's lookin' at me, now, too. "The door to the roof — I locked it with a padlock so the geeks couldn't get to him. There's a good chance he's still alive."

I heard this all before, when all them people kept coming up to me at the campfire. Lori told me to get some food in my stomach; the peaches and jerky. Shane tried to make me go play with Carl. T-Dog said sorry over and over again. Dale gave me the blanket. Rick made me cry. I know how this goes, though. Gettin' someone killed and killin' them with your actual hands are the same thing. I know that.

"To Hell with all'a ya'll!"

He shakes Shane off and beelines for me. He takes me from Lori with bloodied hands — Rick's blood — and I let him yank me by the back of my shirt to my feet, and I fall into his chest when he crouches. His breath is heavy on my neck. Even his skin is hot.

Lori's pale as an egg. I think she's scared of my Dad.

He takes a big breath, stands up, and drags me by the hand back to our tent without sayin' another word.

#the walking dead #twd fanfiction #twd #daryl dixon #daryl dixon twd #daryl dixon fanfiction #daddy issues #rick grimes #fanfic #ao3 fanfic #daryl dixon daughter #parent daryl dixon

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nancywheelxr · 3 years

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i'm not sure if you prefer more specific prompts but if you have any interest, something canon-era (compliant or divergence) in the realm of "ye baiyi & every- or anyone"? whichever characters you wanna include; a moment or moments where he feels like maybe there is a little more to the rest of his life than duty and death. it's not only warm food he's been starved of for decades. your writing is great, i hope you're having a good day!

hi! thank you sm! i love getting prompts regardless, honestly, the only difference is that more specific ones tend to get done faster if only bc I already have a loose idea where to go with it! anyway, this somehow turned into a fix-it. that being said, I hope you’re having a lovely day too!

They’re so painfully young.

A bird chirps in a tree somewhere nearby and around the fire, Qin Huaizhang’s disciple throws the blanket on the Wen brat’s face. What set off his sensibilities this time, Ye Baiyi doesn’t know, it might have been the perceived coddling, it might have simply been the fussing– either way, it’s pointless. Does he not know the brat will simply wait until he’s asleep to cover him? Does he not know their ridiculous dance around each other is nothing but time wasted?

How do the young ever get anything done?

Foolish. Have they ever been that foolish? Changqing, he knows, was a most ridiculous man with even more ridiculous ideas– who’s the bigger idiot, then, the fool or the one who loves him?

“Ye-qianbei,” the boy appears at his side, wide-eyed like a newborn deer and with legs as shaky as one too, “if you’re cold, we have more blankets.”

The absurdity of the situation– to ask Ye Baiyi if he’s cold! What’s the night chill compared to the snowy grounds of his mountain? To him, is this not warm weather? “Little fool,” he says, shaking his head even as he laughs, “you’d do better worrying about your idiot master and his idiot friend.”

The kid looks across the fire, grimaces. “I don’t dare, I don’t dare! My brothers used to tell me not to get in the way when my parents were arguing!”

What a ridiculous child. Ye Baiyi laughs again. “They’re not arguing, they’re being dumb. Watch this,” he flicks a little rock at them, hitting Qin Huaizhang’s disciple in the forehead and earning an outraged glare from the Wen brat. “Qing Huaizhang’s disciple, your disciple is freezing off while you’re fooling around. Is this how you the two of you are going to raise your child?”

Beside him, the kid makes a startled little noise like a scared little rabbit before launching into a stuttering denial, but it’s too late, Qin Huaizhang’s disciple has already turned to focus on him as if smelling blood. “Chengling, are you cold? Why didn’t you say so?”

“Ah, no, no, I’m really not,” he tries, but he is, he wouldn’t have known to worry about others if he hadn’t been feeling the chill himself. “Ye-qianbei! Ye-qianbei–”

“Ah, ah!” Wen Kexing interrupts, shaking a finger in his direction, “why are you calling him? Come here, have this blanket since your Shifu is being stubborn.”

The boy goes obediently, shuffling around and nearly tripping on the log, and allows the Wen brat to wrap the blanket around his shoulders. Predictably, once he’s tucked in, the kid beams, pulling it tightly around himself.

“Chengling, if you’re cold, you have to tell us,” says Qin Huaizhang’s disciple as if that’s a scolding, as if he’s not fussing over the child himself, stoking the fire and throwing in more kindling.

A silly child with even sillier parents. Ye Baiyi snorts, shaking his head, and for a fleeting moment, he imagines walking this path alone– searching for the truth on his own, a silent forest stretching all the way to Longyuan Cabinet, only his footsteps left behind to prove he was even there at all– whatever. Picking up Qin Huaizhang’s dumb disciple and his dumb companions might not have been his worst decision so far.

Maybe he could have found the place already if he were on his own, but at the very least they’re entertaining. Ridiculous, he thinks fondly, shaking his head at the blanket the kid has left folded at his feet.

ii.

What a mess.

Rong Xuan, you little brat, he thinks. How long has it been since the boy had first toddled up to him, little hands grabbing fistfuls of his robes? Too many, an eternity, and now nearly all of the boy’s friends are dead, all but one, and Ye Baiyi has to pay his respects to this freshly dug grave in his place.

What a mess.

If you were in trouble, why didn’t you come back? Questions, questions, it’s too easy to ask them now. Why didn’t you ask for help? Why didn’t you send for us? Why did you think it would accomplish, running away? Stupid child, did you think we would turn you away?

No, there’s no use asking them now, no point in dwelling in the past. What is there to change, after it already happened? Life is a very long road and the past is a land too distant to travel back to; Ye Baiyi would rather focus on the now.

Avenging their child had not been part of the promise he made to Changqing, but Ye Baiyi found the truth of this matter as he told him he would and the truth of it is that someone poisoned his disciple, his child. This cannot go unpunished, so for a while longer, he’ll live.

Further still, a little ways down, is Wen Kexing, whose parents died for Rong Xuan’s mistakes. A child growing up in a harsh world on his own. This debt, he’ll repay too.

For all that he gives his promises away like currency, Ye Baiyi is not sure how he feels about the piling of them– they stretch his finally numbered days, always pushing the deadline further. After the Heroes Conference, he’ll be done with the Ghost Valley. After he finds Rong Xuan’s murderer, he’ll be done with this mess. After he repays Wen Kexing, he will be at peace.

And then–

Well. And then wine. Warm food. That was the plan, was it not? Heavens, he’s beginning to sound like Qin Huaizhang’s silly disciple, isn’t he? This won’t do. Changqing, even you would laugh at them. Tell me, then, if you were here, what would you do? Ah, something nonsensical, most likely, like go watch the plum trees bloom.

Ye Baiyi shakes his head, laughs. Changqing ah, won’t you tell me what to do? Maybe this time I’ll listen to you.

iii.

What kind of nonsense is this?

In all fairness, as much as his opinion of Wen Kexing has been as changing as the seasons, his uncanny ability to be an annoying nuisance has never flickered. He was annoying when he was staring down Ye Baiyi’s sword and he was annoying when he kneeled on the forest bed in apology and plea.

Surely, it’s no surprise that he is annoying now, allegedly dead.

And yet, Ye Baiyi had not anticipated this level of stupidity from him: the brat did not tell Qin Huaizhang’s disciple of his plan.

Children, honestly.

Now, the hem of his robes is wet and a few feet away, Qin Huaizhang’s disciple is wasting perfectly good wine in an unnecessarily dramatic manner. “Whatever stupid thing you’re planning,” Ye Baiyi says, eyeing the broken jar by the rocks, the dullness around the brat, “don’t.”

Zhou Zishu whirls on him with all the grace of a dying wet cat as if he’s in any condition to be fighting anyone, as if his hands weren’t shaking and his steps didn’t falter. The sword, once elegant and proud, wavers. Stupid boy. “Ye Baiyi, you–”

“Have you lost your manners down that jar? Or just your common sense? Put that away before I knock it off your hand myself,” he sighs, shaking his head. He should have stayed in his rooms, like planned, until the Heroes Conference; none of this has anything to do with him, his role in this play is mostly over, he just has to wait it out the intermission. And yet. “What kind of nonsense were you thinking? That fool, Wen Kexing, ran around for days like a headless chicken trying to save you and for what? You to throw it away?”

“What’s the point?” Qin Huaizhang’s disciple laughs, cold as the mountains, “what’s the point if he’s not here? Tell me, qianbei, why should I care to live if my soulmate is gone?”

His sword is dragging up the mud and Ye Baiyi wants to call him disrespectful for it, but the sight of it alone dredges up a well of grief that drowns the words in his throat. Why, indeed. This terrible emptiness, Ye Baiyi knows well– the hollow silence that comes where once a familiar voice called your name, the cold where once there was warmth, a hand never reaching back. Snow, all through summer and spring.

“Because that dumb disciple of yours will not last a day on his own,” he tells him, watching the water run towards the cliff’s edge, “because Qin Huaizhang has only you to pass on his legacy. Because that ridiculous hairpin on your head.”

“That’s not fair,” Qin Huaizhang’s disciple says, sounding exactly like he had been about to do something incredibly stupid earlier that would render this entire charade pointless from the start.

Truth be told, few things are, least of all, fate. Ah, but Ye Baiyi had unchanging decades to come to terms with that, perhaps he should spare the boy the heartache, unfounded as it is. “It’s not, but enough is enough. What are you crying for? Did you think it’s that easy to get rid of that pest? He should be ashamed if a little tumble is all it took.”

“Qianbei… you mean?”

Ye Baiyi heaves a pointedly tired sigh. “Yes, yes, the brat is alive. Probably holed up somewhere in that blasted valley of his.”

Qin Huaizhang’s disciple is as wide-eyed as his baby-deer disciple and if he actually starts crying, Ye Baiyi will drag Wen Kexing out of hiding kicking and screaming just to push him down the cliff again for making him witness this. He’s too old, he has little patience for the dramatics of the young, and he’s supposed to be drinking the best wine from the Yueyang area.

So before he’s pulled even further into their nonsense, Ye Baiyi turns away, back to town and his quarters where he can drink and meditate in peace and really, Qin-xiaozi, your disciple is even sillier than you.

At his back, he hears Zhou Zishu call, but his voice is lost to the waterfalls and Ye Baiyi makes no real effort to catch the words. What’s there to say? Pah, he’s already done more than his share on this, at no point did he promise to intervene on their pointless little dance. Once this is all over, that brat has better pay for all the wine in the land. And make those dumplings, too, for good measure.

iv.

Nobody told him whose wedding this is.

Considering they are in this thrice-damned place, he’s assuming it’s one of the ghosts, but Ye Baiyi figures the brat would be more annoying if it was his and Qin Huaizhang’s disciple’s. Then again, his own presence here is unfathomable, as is the insistence with which the little idiot had asked him to come. What on earth has Qin Huaizhang’s disciple told that child? Give someone an inch and they’ll take a mile, truly– now that boy is running around thinking Ye Baiyi cares about these lunatics.

“Who let him in!” Wen Kexing is screeching from somewhere, and Ye Baiyi mourns his peace as the brat approaches with his purple shadow trailing after. Had she been there this entire time? He squints. No, he would have noticed it, she’s very loud. “Old toad monster! Why are you still here? Who allowed you past the gates?”

“Who are you to tell me where to go?” He scoffs, flicking his sleeves as he crosses his arms. Nearby, a ghost hastily scurries away. “And it was your dumb disciple who begged me to be here. For what? Will there even be a banquet? And you call that decorations? That lantern is so crooked, it’s offensive!”

The purple child bristles. “Ah! And who does that silly boy think he is, inviting people to my wedding! Old man, you! Of course there’s gonna be food! Master and Luo-yi have been–”

“A-Xiang!” The brat cuts her off, closed fan tapping her forehead, as if everyone and their grandmothers don’t already know he’s been running around making preparations. What face is there to save, shameless as he is? If Ye Baiyi was a lesser man, he might have rolled his eyes. “Stop running your mouth, what is your husband going to say? And you! What crooked lantern? You’re going blind in your age!”

Still, even as he speaks, a pointed glare sends the ghosts scattering like mice, rushing to check on the decorations. Ridiculous. “No wonder the girl has no manners. What, you only know how to be polite when asking for something?”

Wen Kexing grumbles. “This one apologizes, qianbei.”

Well, that’s certainly worse. Unsettling. If even Wen Kexing starts being deferential, then what has the world come to? No, Ye Baiyi finds he’d prefer the brashness. Stupid child, what’s the point in changing his tune now? Pah. “Girl,” he says to that purple wisp of a thing, “your master is a pest. Where’s the wine?”

Baffling enough, the girl laughs, tugging at her master’s sleeves. “Master, master, Zishu-ge was right! You did make a friend!”

“What nonsense is this! Don’t you know when A-Xu is teasing? Friends! As if–”

“What rubbish have you been filling these children’s heads with?” He shakes a threatening finger in their direction. Not that it matters, considering the girl has already stepped back, giggling as she sidesteps Wen Kexing’s fan.

Leaving them to their childishness, Ye Baiyi slips out of the crowd, picking a jar of wine as he goes. The alcohol is good, burning down his throat, and he hadn’t thought he’d step foot in the Ghost Valley, not like this. Something in him will always recoil at this place, always lay the blame at the valley’s mouth, a yawning jaw that’s swallowed whole the people most precious to him with no mercy.

And yet, Changqing ah, you bastard, look at it. They’re holding a damned wedding, and here Ye Baiyi is, drinking their wine. Are you happy now? Did you become a bodhisattva yet? Fate makes fools of them all, there’s no way around it. He pours the wine over the rocks, lets it spill and run like blood. Xuan’er, did I not tell you not to climb so high? That shifu wouldn’t always be there to catch you if you slip on the ice? Ye Baiyi laughs at the memory– always clear in his mind, suspended in time, unfading, even if his sight blurs with tears– that boy, always scaring them half to death, climbing up the frozen mountainside as a child, then crying in fright once he looked down.

“Look at the mess you’ve both left me,” he says out loud, downing the rest of the wine, and the silence is never quite as loud as in the hollow space where another would speak. For so long, Ye Baiyi knew to leave room for Changqing’s teasing, for their child’s incessant questions, even Rong-furen’s tired voice. Then, nothing. “What do you have to say for yourself, hm? Typical. I’ll drink for all of us this time, then, how about it? Changqing, I’m keeping my promises, so you’d better keep yours or I’ll–”

The jar breaks where it falls from his fingers and he shakes his head as if dispelling the murky thoughts from his head. Perhaps, coming here was a mistake. The ashes have already been sent back to Changming, so what business does he have in this place? To see it closed with his own eyes? Besides, a wedding or two, a handful of people, are not worth the bloodshed creating the valley has brought, no matter what Changqing might say.

Is this a comforting story to be told later, if– by the bridge, in case–

His thoughts grind to a halt, veering off suddenly into attention to his surroundings. Someone is coming. Indeed, from his place near the entrance, Ye Baiyi can see in the distance a mob climbing up the path, silent as thieves in the night, with only a blue streak of disciples in plain sight at the front.

So much for avoiding bloodshed. Did they even wait for the dust to settle after the monks left town? And what kind of harebrained scheme is this? Has this generation been born with no brains? Such a reckless, petty move! No honor, agreeing to something and then plunging the knife behind their backs.

There is little time to curse their dishonesty, though, with their numbers fast approaching, so Ye Baiyi swipes a last look at the desolate landscape and slips back inside to sound the alarms. After all, heaven knows that little purple girl will be terribly loud if she doesn’t get her wedding, and Ye Baiyi is not looking forward to remembering what headaches feel like. Honestly, if these people would stop nearly dying for five fucking minutes–

Today, the mirror showed a new patch of white hair, faint lines at the corner of his eyes.

Time, it seems, is catching up to him.

It’s exhilarating.

The plum trees have already lost their blossoms, winter gone as swiftly as it came, the cold melting to the lingering warmth of spring. Today, he walks past blooming azaleas, purple and red radiant against the blue backdrop of the sky.

It brings him to little Qin Huaizhang standing beside Rong Xuan, trying so very hard to impress his friend’s seniors with all the desperation of youth. The poetry he had waxed about his sect’s gardens– Four Seasons Manor, blooming all year round! Ye Baiyi had found him so silly, blabbering while Rong Xuan beamed, so quick to pick the fights Rong Xuan dropped.

At the time, had he not thought history was repeating itself, if kinder? The Baiyi sword, gifted with the promise to keep his dumb disciple out of trouble? He still remembers Changqing’s face, the hypocrite. So exchanging swords for cursed books is fine, but anything else and you draw the line? At least promises were as reliable as the person making them.

Now, he has to admit, the silly boy had not been wrong– Four Seasons Manor stands in more color than Ye Baiyi had thought possible. If he’ll have time to witness all its blooms, he doesn’t know, but this spring, he’s here, and isn’t that enough?

At the gates, the young disciple lets him in without a word, bowing respectfully like his seniors have never done. Good. At the very least, those two good-for-nothing brats had the decency to forewarn their juniors of his arrival. How long has it been since Qin Huaizhang’s disciple woke up from the procedure? Aiyah, Ye Baiyi can’t remember, he had been traveling south at the time.

Well, it’s long enough to be past the need for coddling, that’s for sure. “Qin Huaizhang’s disciple, what kind of Sect Leader are you that you won’t come greet your esteemed guest?”

“Not really a Sect Leader,” comes the voice from his left as Zhou Zishu rounds into view, his silly disciple trailing faithfully after him. He looks better now, death no longer draped over his shoulders like a shroud, smiling like he found peace somewhere in the months since that disastrous wedding. “Qianbei, this one is honored to welcome you to our house. You’ve come at a good time, A-Xiang is visiting with her husband too.”

“Who’s an esteemed guest here? All I’m hearing is a bunch of freeloaders!” says Wen Kexing from somewhere inside the building, just as loud and brash as always, and following his words, the thundering footsteps of children.

Ye Baiyi snorts, shakes his head. Changqing ah, wait a little while longer, will you? I’m on my way, but I have some places to visit first. Meet me by the bridge, I’ll tell you all about it in a bit.

#woh #word of honor #yby #ye baiyi #fix it fic #shl #wen kexing #zhou zishu #gu xiang #wenzhou #ye baiyi/rong changqing #woh fanfic #woh tag #yby tag

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rpmemesbyarat · 3 years

Conversation

RP meme from "Only Lovers Left Alive"

"I have something special for you."

"I need a bullet. A very special bullet."

"Anything else weird or interesting you might need?"

"Please feel free to piss in the garden."

"There's only an hour before sunrise."

"Is that the really good stuff?"

"I've told you a thousand times, never call me that name in public."

"I can keep a secret. You should know that."

"You've been wearing that waistcoat for four centuries."

"So, are you saying that we're never gonna let the cat out of the bag? Can't we drop the odd hint here and there? It would cause such thrilling chaos."

"You scared the shit out of me!"

"You know, this whole set-up is a bit unnerving for me."

"I like to come to the source."

"I don't have any spare time."

"Is that you scrabbling about with all your wires and knobs, my old pack rat?"

"Any supply problems?"

"I just feel like all the sand's at the bottom of the hourglass or something."

"I seem to be writing a lot of funeral music."

"Oh, my darling, why don't you just come here and kiss me?"

"You used to love Tangier. You loved the music."

"It's just the travelling that's such a drag."

"You know, for a zombie, you're all right."

"You bought my car and everything."

"There were some rock 'n' roll kids here last night, ringing my doorbell."

"How do they know where you live?"

"No one fucking lives out here."

"I'm gonna spread some rumours, very cautiously, about where you might live and I'll just throw 'em way off track."

"Whatever you need to do, please do it. Just take care of it."

"Was he painfully good-looking?"

"Look, I know I don't have to say this to you, but please be cautious.

"I couldn't bear it if--I couldn't bear it if something happened to you."

"Mephitis mephitis."

"I love what you've done with the place."

"What about all your heroes?"

"I don't have heroes."

"What about your blessed scientists?"

"Pythagoras, slaughtered. Galileo, imprisoned. Copernicus, ridiculed. Poor old Newton pushed into secrecy and alchemy. Tesla, destroyed. His beautiful possibilities completely ignored. And they're still bitching about Darwin. Still. So much for the scientists."

"So this is your wilderness?"

"You're trying to distract me."

"Now, no more talking."

"You love telling me these things and I love to hear them."

"Frankly, he was a pompous arse."

"You're brutal."

"I'm a survivor, baby."

"Oh, what a lovely place!"

"It's so antiquated. I mean, what century is this?"

"Oh! What a hidden treasure, my darling."

"Did you make that?"

"Oh, this might need a recalibration."

"Just goes to show, we don't know shit about fungi. Even though life on this planet couldn't exist without them."

"Are we playing doctors?"

"Well, I suppose it could have been worse."

"Maybe you need to get a little more sunlight. Vitamin D deficiency can have serious consequences."

"Fresh blood, baby."

"How can you have lived for so long and still not get it?"

"This self-obsession, it's a waste of living that could be spent on surviving things, appreciating nature, nurturing kindness and friendship, and dancing."

"You've been pretty lucky in love, though, if I may say so."

"Did you know that there's a diamond up there the size of a planet? It's a white dwarf. It's the compressed heart of a star. And it's not only a radiant diamond, but it also emits the music of a gigantic gong."

"A diamond? That emits the music of a gigantic gong?"

"Well, we are related by blood."

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"You're still so beautiful."

"You do know it's very bad luck to cross a threshold without being invited."

"Can I get a download?"

"Are you alone?"

"No fucking way, not after last time."

"I'm really, really, really hungry. Do you maybe have something?"

"I just want to see where you keep it."

"We're gonna have so much fun together."

"It's always a bit weird with family."

"Don't worry. Go to sleep now."

"Darling, can't we sleep a little longer?"

"Isn't it time to get up?"

"Oh, this is from French television, 1975."

"Why did you turn it off? I love that! I found it on YouTube."

"It's probably blood poisoning."

"Are you taking care of your nutrition?"

"You have to be very careful. There's a lot of contamination around."

"My God, that is good! I want more."

"This is pure shit."

"You're gonna drain our whole fucking supply, so take it easy."

"I might have been born at night but I wasn't born last night."

"I wanna hear some music."

"You're so fucking boring!"

"That was like some martial-arts type shit, man."

"Are you gonna dance with me, rock star?"

"Don't draw attention to yourself."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just getting excited."

"I'm just really thirsty."

"I think it's time to retire."

"I need you all to myself again."

"What the fuck? That's my stuff!"

"Get the fuck out of my house."

"You know what you guys are? You're condescending snobs!"

"Go fuck each other!"

"So much for that confidentiality agreement."

"How beautifully made it is inside."

"Canis latrans. How lovely."

"That certainly was visual."

"Yes, I'm sorry, I know it's complicated."

"Is there another connection?"

"What about all my instruments?"

"Do you need something?"

"I have something very special for you."

"Not far to go now."

"Ow! What was that for?"

"You've gotta get up. Come on."

"I have what you need."

"This is a very, very bad situation."

"Look what the cat dragged in."

"This is the very last of the good stuff."

"Avoid the hospital here."

"I got some bad stuff."

"Humility gets you nowhere."

"Illiterate zombie philistine!"

"It was all so political."

"Anyway, I was supposed to be dead. And now at last I shall be."

"Give me all your money, baby."

"I'm gonna get you that present."

"And no funny business."

"Have the water wars started yet? Or is it still about the oil?"

"I'm barely still here."

"We're finished, aren't we?"

"So fucking 15th century."

"They are deliciously beautiful, though, aren't they?"

"What choice do we have, really?"

"How romantic of you."

#rp memes #rp meme #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #only lovers left alive #olla

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silvermahogany · 3 years

Text

Talking about a few songs I associate with my favourite aonoex characters bc i enjoy shoving my music taste in people's faces and analysing the shit out of nothing <3

Recent chapter spoiler warning lessgo, also mentions of suicide tw

THE MAIN MANS HIMSELF

Still feel - Half•Alive

"I am not a slave, so pick me from the dark and pull me from the grave"

In my mind, this is his themesong without a doubt. Its reached the point where wherever i hear it it makes me really happy because I associate it with him so strongly :,D might just be because I found it while getting back into the fandom when Ren was kinda transitioning to my favourite so they came up together but either way, absolute banger. The bit at the end when everything drops and the lead singer belts his heart out, I always love to picture Ren doing the same in the illuminati uniform with Yamatanka building around him and I've never wanted to learn how to animate more in my life cause my GOD he's so cool.

My favourite song for my favourite character <3

Preach - Saint Motel

"Oh im down on my knees, mercy"

Its so happy and bouncy?? And the vibes are immaculate?? Matches well with the themes of religion as well, this one definitely shows his flirty loverboy side more, it gives the impression of some lovestruck idiot stumbling over himself every time his crush does anything and honestly, sounds like something he'd do. Good song makes me go :))))

Your Love (Deja Vu) - Glass Animals

"You eat us up, you live like you're on camera"

I feel like this one captures his spy side a little more than the others. The lower notes in the main verses give a secretive feel, like he's halfway through a mission and trying trying stay silent. But it's also flirty in a more smooth way than wholesome crushes like the rest. The lead singer has such a gorgeous voice too i'll praise glass animals until the day i die 🥺🥺 God tier song god tier vibe 1000000/10

Do It All The Time - IDKHOWBUTTHEYFOUNDME

"Now we're so young but we're probably gonna die, it's so fun we're so good at selling lies"

Now THIS is a song for a spy working for a secret deadly organisation, all about world domination and having a great time doing it. Renzou is a free spirit and loves the freedom of his job, and this song really captures that for me. He knows he's in danger, but he's living his best life and he's having a great time doing it baybeeee B)))

Sweet Talk - Saint Motel

"You could yell 'piss off won't you stay away!' And still be sweet talk to my ears"

Ren is a persistent little shit when it comes comes crushes and this song shows it, a song about a guy who's so infatuated he doesn't care if he's hated or laughed at, he just loves hearing their voice. I see this as a bit of a yukishima anthem tbh, I feel like in the early stages of their relationship it would be pretty one sided with Shima trying to win him over and Yukio shutting him down so this matches that pretty well :>

Cant go five minutes without talking about them can i-

Honourable mentions-

Talk too much - COIN - very flirty and cheesy considered it as his themesong for a while

Toxic - Britney Spears - self explanatory :)

Razzmatazz - IDKHBTFM - everything they make shows his spy side imo, good for daydreaming

Van horn - Saint Motel -honestly anything by Saint Motel or Half•Alive reminds me of him, great bands :D

YUKIO MY BELOVED

Yukio was weirdly a lot harder for me to find songs for. For Renzou i have a giant playlist I add to over time, supreme comfort playlist egegegeheh, but Yukio's is a lot shorter for some reason. I guess his vibe is a little difficult to get down but a while scrolling through my main playlist and I think I have a decent few that at least match his character development and plotline.

Stressed Out - Twenty one Pilots

"Out of student loans and treehouse homes we all would take the latter"

Pretty self explanatory really, mans was forced to grow up and mature way faster than he shouldve had to, having a high stress job by the age of 13 studying for two meister all while studying to be a normal doctor as well. Not much of a surprise he has so many mental issues by the beginning of the story. I dont listen to much TOP but the few songs I know seem to fit Yukio pretty nicely :)

Oh Klahoma - Jack Stauber

"Those aren't meant to bend, no those arent meant to bend"

Another song based on depression, but with a much quieter feel, much lower energy. I feel like this one more links to his tendencies of delf destruction, and how alone he feels as he faces his battle. Like he's singing into the void hoping for something to reply, but nothing will. Man :(

The Fall - Half•Alive

"I'd jump off and into your arms but i cant trust the fall"

I feel like this one highlight his story to Rin in a really realistic way. Yukio has a good heart, he's kind and wants to love his brother and open up to him he wants to get better. But he's so deep in his pit of depression and conflicting feelings over his brother that he can't bring himself to, he sees no way out. God I wanna write an analysis on his character so bAD-

Baby Hotline - Jack Stauber

"Numb, I've been burning with haste and I'm realising now it's a terrible waste"

We just keep getting darker huh, didn't pick very pleasant tunes for this boy did I. A bouncy, happy song about a girl calling a suicide hotline, lovely. But i feel like it describes his mental state pretty well, outside he seems ok. Sure Rin picks up that somethings off, but once Yukio assures him he doesnt really persist above asking him a couple times. But below the facade he's really reaching his breaking point, and I love how this song contrasts those two tones in a scarily natural way. Absolute banger

Fireflies - Gorillaz

"And if you say goodbye too many times, the sentinels will find me and switch me off this time"

One of my absolute favourite Gorillaz songs by far. The melody is so gorgeous, melancholic in the best kind of way. For Yukio I feel like it signifies how trapped he feels as Satan's son, he's hit his lowest point and he doesnt know how to start moving back up. But the song also has a hopeful feel to it, as if even though he feels lost, he will get better. In the recent chapters we see a moment of reconciliation between Yukio and the people around him, with Suguro forgiving him and tye two brothers finally getting a chance to to things out. Before everything went to shit lmaoo. But with that i really hope that after all the fighting is done, Yukio will finally get the chance to see how bad things have gotten, and reach out to get better. And this song shows that for me :D

Honourable mentions!!

Creature - Half•Alive - the first song I ever added to his playlist, there for sentimentality tbh

Cane shuga - Glass Animals - the plonky noises make the happy chemical go buckwild, not sure why it reminds me of him it just kinda does really

I Earn My Life - Lemon Demon - mans is overworked give him a break :( ngl i don't associate it with him much but i wanted to edge a lemon demon song in somewhere-

Dead inside - Younger Hunger - whenever I hear this I always imagine a really cool animation of him and it always plays out the same way and MAN I wanna animate so baDD

Absolute wordvomit woohoo, hypervocused on this instead if doing the assignment due this evening I'm a fantastic student. This was kinda fun tho!!! I might do other characters at somepoint, these guys are my favourites but i have a bunch of playlists for other characters like Amaimon and Shura, recommendations are welcome too!!

#blue exorcist #yukio okumura #shima renzou #aonoex #ao no exorcist #seriously i love Still Feel so much im losing my shit over that song #half alive #i put way too mucn effort into this #day 38372974838 of hyperfixating on these boys

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peanutxparker · 4 years

Text

A (very long) list of all of my favorite AJJ lyrics because why not

Candy Cigarettes and Cap Guns (2005)

“Well my great grand-dad he died of cancer, from smoking too many cigarettes. But I must confess that he did quite profess to being the coolest motherfucker I ever met.”

“And cocaine is essentially vegan and they don't give a fuck anyway.”

“And I can't help but miss him even though he hit me everyday.”

“So fuck white people! (fuck white people!)”

“Heaven is a special place in hell where you can watch the people you hate get hurt.”

“You find me quite charming and I find it quite alarming ‘cause I'm gonna take your life. You find me quite charming and I find it quite alarming and I'm sad you won't be my wife.”

“What makes you think you can be so pretty? And what makes you think you can be so great? And what makes you think you can be so intelligent? And what makes you think you can be so far away?”

“What makes you think you can be so wonderful? And what makes you think you can be so keen? And what makes me think I can be so hurtful? And what makes me think I can be so mean?”

“Sometimes I feel like a cigarette, I'm wrapped in paper and I'm suffocating to death.”

“I don't want to be a cigarette anymore. I'll go to hell in my self death all day and night, so please just put me out.”

People Who Can Eat People Are The Luckiest People In The World (2007)

“Rejoice despite the fact this world will hurt you. Rejoice despite the fact this world will kill you. Rejoice despite the fact this world will tear you to shreds. Rejoice because you’re trying your best”

“I'm afraid to leave the house. I'm as timid as a mouse. I'm afraid if I go out I'll outwear my welcome. I'm not a courageous man. I don't have any big lasting plans. I'm too cowardly to take a stand, I want to keep my nose clean. And it's sad to know that we're not alone in this and it's sad to know that there's no honest way out. In this life we lead, we could conquer everything if we could just get the brave to get out of bed in the morning.”

“And I give a thank-you to my father for not raising me, and I give a finger to my step-father for beating me, and I give props to myself for achieving, and god damn I’m glad that I survived, and god damn I’m surprised that I survived.”

“So I looked into your eyes and I saw the reflection of a coward you and I both hate very much and then I grabbed the knife and I let the blood out of your throat and I smashed those tiny mirrors inside of your skull.”

“If I don’t go to hell when I die I might go to heaven, might go to heaven. But probably not.”

“Just happy times and half assed rhymes and mimes because mimes are dears, but most of all I want no more tears.”

“No more racism. No more discrimination. No more fat dumb fucks keeping people out of our nation.”

“We’re all one big band across this land and we should sing in tune. Let us grow the balls to break the walls, we’ve got to do it soon.”

“And I hope our candles flicker and die so that our hearts don’t burn to the ground.”

“First we were babies, we're birthing and dying. Then we were children, we're playing and crying. And then we're teenagers and smoking and fucking. But now we're all grown up and we're sadly sighing.”

“And your manic depression, it comes and it goes. Your parasympathetic nervous system reacts and you're in fight or flight mode.”

“How's the world so small when the world is so large? And what made the world? Could I please speak to who's in charge? Everything is real but it's also just as fake. From your daughter's birthday party to your grandmother's wake.”

“I've tried to know which words to sing so many times. I tried to know which chord to play and I tried to make it rhyme. And I tried to find the key that all good songs are in. And I tried to find that notes to make that great, resounding din.”

“There's someone in your head waiting to fucking strangle you.”

“I've got essays, I've got finals due. I have got lots and lots of problems.”

“Welcome to this world, have as much fun as you would like while helping others have as much fun as you're having. Be kind to those you love and be kind to those you don't but for God's sake you gotta be kind.”

Can’t Maintain (2009)

“I wanna pick up the pieces and plant them in the ground. When a tree grows there I want to chop that tree down. Build it into a boat and float it in a lake. And with dynamite I will explode the thing that makes me make mistakes.”

“Sometimes I get so lonesome I can't breathe. Sometimes I get so scared that I can't speak. Sometimes I get so worried I can't hear my heartbeat. Anyway…”

“I wanna tear out my heart and give it away to a person more deserving one day. If all I see is the worst in everything that's all I'm gonna get, that's all I'm gonna get, that's all I'm gonna get.”

“And people freak me out. People make me scared. People make me so damn self-aware.”

“I get bronchitis twice a year at least. My lungs aren't the way they should be. And I smoke more than a mother fuckin chimney. I declare war on my body.”

“You will cough up crows that peck my eyes and I will do nothing but go blind.”

“We could live there together or I'll live alone, less happy but I'll live... unfortunately.”

“And no one will know how I truly feel ‘cause I can no longer differentiate between what is fake and what is real. I don't know how I feel.”

“And I will always appreciate bad days like this because they grant me a point of reference in regards to my happiness.”

“If the bridge that I was driving over collapsed while I was driving over it that may not be such a bad thing. I would finally meet my maker, I could meet the great creator, and I'd punch him for teaching me how to sing.”

“Don't know if I believe in god but sometimes I pray because the way I was raised keeps me afraid.”

“I hope I can forgive me for having the nerve to exist. I hope someone can help me make some sense of this.”

“Sense and sensibility and peaceful productivity, a pretty girl with broken wings is all that I desire. But there's so much hostility in all the things surrounding me. The awful glow of enmity is trying to stop my shine. So I try to look inwardly at all the things inside of me but sodomy and buggery keep bubbling to the top.”

“I met you once over the phone, you sounded sad and you seemed alone. You left me but I never left you. I never had the chance to.”

“If you spend all your heart on something that has died you are not alive and that can't be your life.”

Knife Man (2011)

“There's no one to blame. People are just fucking mean.”

“So if I see a penny on the ground, I leave it alone or fucking flip it. I'm a straight white male in America. I've got all the luck I need.”

“I've got a pile of broken mirrors and I'm walking under ladders and I'll spill a ton of salt because to me that doesn't matter.”

“You were dead by the time that I had found you. Your blood was spilled on the couch where we had first kissed. So I carried you west to the sea so I could wash you. Your body felt just like a back pack.”

“I hate whiny, fucking songs like this but I can't afford a therapist. Sorry guys, here's a solo.”

“Some days I feel like I'm the weakest and others the strongest. These days are the longest and I've got the weirdest feeling about this and I wanna go away for a while.”

“I wish I had a bullet big enough to fucking kill the sun. I'm sick of songs about the summer.”

“When you have no one, you are no one. Like I said, I used to work at the people pound. All these no ones clumped together, just like a human lost and found. If they left them all be someones there wouldn't be enough to go around. It's better for us all us if there are no ones. And I knew a lot of no ones round that time. They used to all be someones until something took their life and all their someones disappeared while they're stuck there waiting in a line. And for them now, no one seems to have the time.”

“They say ambition is an enemy of weakness and greatness is an enemy of fame.When I pick up my guitar and I try to write a song, I think of what my mentor used to say… “Who fucking gives a rat's ass Steve, just write a love song. Cus they'll keep your belly full and your wallet lined. Don't bother these nice people with your sad sack songs. If you ask me I think they're just a waste of time.””

“Inspiration is the best friend of my sorrow and sorrow is the best friend of my drink. Well I want to look myself in the eye tomorrow but I'm too worried of what other folk's will think.”

“And the troubles in my heart need to get let out. And the troubles in my heart need to escape. And I never liked writing poetry and I never liked doing pottery and God knows that I never learned to paint. So every now and then, I'll sing sad songs. Cus it keeps my spirit light and my conscience clean. And if you don't care to hear I don't mind if you go out for some air. Cus I'm happy that you're happier than me.”

“So I wish I had a cigarette for every time a perfect stranger asked me for a cigarette but I wonder what a cigarette will really do to help that person out. I wish to God I had some spare change for every time a perfect stranger asked me for some spare change but there's not enough spare change in the world to make such an empty gesture count.”

“You can hope it gets better and you can follow your dreams but hope is for presidents and dreams are for people who are sleeping.”

“You don't have it any better and you don't have it any worse. You're an irreplaceable human soul with your own understanding of what it means to suffer and that’s a huge bummer.”

“I'm afraid of the way I live my life. I'm afraid of the way I don't. I'm afraid of the things that I want to do but I won't. I'm afraid of God. I'm afraid to believe and I'm afraid of all the loved ones that I've made leave. I'm afraid that my dog doesn't love me anymore. I'm afraid of the social laziness that let Kitty Genovese die. And I'm afraid of the mob mentality that makes otherwise normal people go blind. I'm afraid of the way that the world works and I'm afraid of the words in my notebooks. I'm afraid that you all know that I am a pervert.”

“It's harder to be yourself than it is to be anybody else. I wish I were a little less of a coward but the big red bird that lives under the city doesn't give a damn about me and it dies every night. So I bought a knife. I am a knife.”

Rompilation (2012)

“I used to be a spiderman, I used to be a cowboy from hell, but not anymore. Now I'm just a clam and I live inside this shell inside this shell I am. God damn I hate my brain.”

“I'll dip my brain in medicine so that you can stand to be with me.”

“Give me your tired, give me your tired, give me your poor. When our government acts like this, I wonder what World War II was for and the rest of the country hates us more and more. Lady Liberty is not a whore.”

“This is not a protest, it's a tortoise slowly pushing through a race. I hope the tortoise keeps its patience while the hare continues to pepper-spray its face.”

“There is no enemy, there's only people that also love their families and they're scared that they won't have enough long after they are deceased. But how much money do they need? Love turns into fear, and fear turns into greed. There is no enemy, there's only dummies that also love their families.”

“And this is not a phase, it's just a matter of time, with diligence and peacefulness, you will reach them and you will change their minds. If you stay there long enough, they'll start to see you.”

“And when you pushed my face in shit how could that have made you feel like a man or like a monster. It's your fault that I can't tell the difference.”

“In the evening I try songwriting. I'm self loathing, but I love singing. I'll try escaping these evil feelings but they keep coming, they keep coming…”

“So the baby's gonna have a daddy, that's wonderful news. He won't be the greatest parent but neither will you! Gotta get out while you can, otherwise you're screwed. Your legs are broken and your eyes are black and blue.”

“And smoking is like hiring a hitman for five dollars a day, and as cool as that is, I don't wanna keep dying this way.”

Christmas Island (2014)

“Shoot him again ‘cause I can see his soul dancing.”

“If you give it to me I’ll give it back much harder. If you treat me like a son, then I’ll treat you like a daughter. Everyone has a future, everyone has a soul, everyone has a heart, they have a mind, they have control.”

“The Coffin Dancer dances like he has something the prove because he does. He sleeps a couple hours in the morning, hates the morning when he wakes up.”

“The Coffin Dancer dances like he wants to make a friend, but he does not.”

“Getting naked and playing with guns. There's a gerbil in the microwave, a baseball bat in everyone. Sharing kisses and building a bomb. We'll set it off like Microsoft in '94.”

“McDonald's PlayPlace before the Xbox, cake frosting, sweet talking, bedroom wall, covered in knives, touching God, burning shit. We'll make a wish and take a trip to Future Town like our daddy did.”

“Have you ever wanted to be, have you ever wanted to see someone better in the mirror? Have you ever wanted to go, have you ever wanted to know somewhere greener, somewhere cleaner. I bet you got something beautiful in mind.”

“I can’t handle astounding works of beauty. I think I like my pretty pretty ugly but the beautiful soul I witnessed in that movie was an entirely different kind of overwhelming. It was a dog that won’t stop barking. Like a cut that never stops bleeding. Arizona sunsets in the early evening. Or a grown man inconsolably weeping.”

“I am the Kool-Aid stains on the mouth of a kid whose name is most likely Cody. He had a juice box for breakfast and he carries a stick that he most likely found in the alley. Cody doesn't have friends and his parents hate each other and he wants to find a better way to love his family and after school he hangs out in the abandoned house behind the Arby's.”

The Bible 2 (2016)

“Oh, I love you cause I love you cause I can.”

“On your last night at Saint Mary's you were way too intoxicated to breathe. So I used your ribs as ladders and I climbed up on your chest and I jumped up and down just like a trampoline.”

“Confused and rude. Such a special kind of way to be cruel.”

“If I were one of the things, I'd be american garbage. The most beautiful thing. The most beautiful american garbage you have ever seen.”

“No more shame, no more fear, no more dread.”

“And if you don't want to feel the feeling, no one should ever make you feel the feeling.”

“I thought I saw you before I knew who you were.”

“I just wanted to rage but all I got was tired”

“I showed him all the books that I was raised on. Your Madeleine L'Engle(s) and D'Aulaires' Mythologies.”

“And his eyes became a beacon, an LCD projector, broadcasting all my memories in a clear and vivid picture. His tongue became a staircase, his uvula - The knocker of an ornate wooden door that lead me straight into my future. His throat became a hallway with a thousand baby pictures and I became forgiveness, I transformed into the closure that I lost when I learned about the tragedy of all of us. I lost it when I learned about the tragedy of all of us.”

Good Luck Everybody (2019)

“If you don't give it to them they'll starve to death and that's alright.”

“I've got the normalization blues, this isn't normal, this isn't good.”

“I'm detached and I'm distracted, all keyed up but unproductive, vacillating between being all excited and disgusted and then dozing lackadaisically in this bubble where I've made my mental home. Connection's more important now than it ever was, but I'd rather be alone.”

“And when we talk about the president, we're either pissed off or we're giggling about an atrocity he's committing or some stupid shit he's tweeting. He's a symptom and a weapon of the evil men who really run the show. The ones who melt down human beings into money like a cruel Sorcerer's Stone.”

“This is the golden age of dickotry, probably the last golden age of anything, and the ugliest word in the English language is anthropocene. Good luck, everybody. Good luck.”

“But before that, you'll be a doormat, for every vicious narcissist in the world. Oh how they'll screw you, all up and over, then feed you silence for dessert.”

“I'm sorry that you have to have a body, filled with infection, one hundred scabs singing in unison, eyes and hands, sometimes bullets, uninvited, passing through us.”

“Oh to be awake for such a shitty dream. A bullet in the head of every decent thing.”

“The lake of dead black children that America created is getting fuller than the founding Fathers even wanted. The ghost of great America was underestimated and now it rages like a cold sore on the lip of this dumb nation. Again we've slipped inside a pit of absolute despair. That's where we live.”

“Rewarding our worst cruelty, they destroyed our shared reality, and now they upsell us our dignity like some fucked VIP package.”

“There is no absolute, these days there's no such thing as truth and you don't need to be a dick about it.”

“I'm a burnout and a fool, oblivious to all I do. I move my lips when I read and breathe with my mouth open, wide open. Timid, meek, and cruel, this is the best that I can do. I need to speak my truth, yet here I'm broken wide, wide open. My resentment, big and strong, and all the things that I can't change. They'll buckle me beneath the weight. I will drive myself insane with all the things that I can't change. I hate all the things that I can't change.”

“You're a loudmouth and a tool, and as it turns out I am too, and you don't need to be a dick about it.”

“Because I know that you know what I need more than me and I know that you need me more than that.”

“For all the pussies you grab and the children you lock up in prison, for all the rights you roll back and your constant stream of racism, for all the poison you drip in my ear, for all your ugly American fear. I wrote you this beautiful song called Psychic Warfare.”

“I hate you with all of my heart. I hate you with all of my art.”

“I went back to the desert, little Midwest in me, and now I am colder than I used to be. I live in a fortress the shape of my body, and now there's a coldness, and it's shaped like me. Now I don't suffer any more bullshit gladly. Even though everything's bullshit now, here in 2019 and you can bet it's gonna be a bunch of bullshit too out in sweet 2020 or whenever this album's released.”

#ajj band #ajj #andrew jackson jihad

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vanillann · 4 years

Text

cupid’s aim (sirius black x f!reader)

this was going to be on my wattpad but i thought it might do better up here, so we’ll see!!

word count: 1.3k

cupid’s aim masterlist

prologue

"Do they look like they are in love?"

"I can't tell Black, your greasy hair is in the way."

A small gasp echoed the broom cabinet Sirius and I stood in, his wide eyes burning into my skull. The only light that flooded the cabinets was from the small crack in the door, the perfect line of sight to watch Remus and Myles Wilcox flirt.

Or at least hopefully flirting.

"I washed my hair this morning Bennett, I used vanilla shampoo," Sirius whispered-yelled in my ear, taking a small bit of hair and dangling it in my face.

"I'm going to kill you."

"They would catch you."

"Did you forget my best friend is Cherry Brown?"

I kept my hands on either side of the crack while turning to look at the boy over the man 's shoulder. The small crack of light shone across one of his eyes and half his mouth, almost something out of a piece of art.

"You're right, I'm so sorry my queen."

Sirius bowed his head to him, lifting his head back up to bang it on the top of the cabinet. I jumped, turning back to the two boys flirting barely a few feet away from us. They didn't seem to react, still carry on a conversation like before.

"Black if you don't get your-"

I gasped this time as I walked Myles fingers delicately placed a small yellow flower behind Remus' ear, the shit eating smirk on his face showed that whatever they were talking about had to be flirty.

"Did he punch him?"

I let my hand fill behind me, feeling around until I found Sirius tie. I dragged his face to hover right over my shoulder, moving my head slightly so he could see the scene before me.

"Godric (Y/N), I think we actually did something."

Sirius turned his head, his nose bumping against mine as he looked at me with his grey eyes. They held pure awe as they burned into my own, the iris of his eye was blown impeccably and his thin lips were parted somewhat.

"We got good aim Black."

"Huh?"

I rolled my eyes and his eyebrow lifted, pushing him slightly so I was looking back out the small crack again.

"You seduced me for your spot back!"

I kick my leg back, my small flats running into his shin. As soon as I began pulling my foot back to the spot on the wooden floor I felt two hands wrap around my ankle.

"Nope."

He pulled back, hard. I felt my front crash onto the floor causing brooms to fall on top of Sirius and I, splinters from the floor and the brooms breaking my skin.

"Oh shit'" Sirius' small laughs filled the cabinet, his deep voice made everything sound breathy.

"Sleep with one eye open tonight Black, Cherry is really good at breaking into things."

I heard the door of the cabinet swing open, light flooding my back while I hid my face in my arm .

Please don't be Remus, please don't be Remus.

"You didn't tell me you two were shagging!"

I looked up to see James Potter looking at us both with such wide eyes his glasses were slowly falling to the tip of his nose.

"We aren't Prongs," Sirius stepped from the small shape, finally allowing me to untangle myself from the brooms laid across my back.

"We were spying on Remus."

I felt a few brooms lift off my back, enough wait was gone so I could turn to my side. Sirius stood beside me, passing brooms to James while pulling more from off me.

"Why? Does Remus hate us now?"

James looked between Sirius and I panicked, dropping the few brooms that were held in his grip.

"No, we set him up with Myles Wilcox," Sirius set the few brooms against the door and held a hand out for me, my hand easily slipping into his and he pulled me from the floor of the broom closet.

"Oh, well how'd it go?"

"Fabulous if I do say so myself."

"And she does say so herself," Sirius grabbed my shoulders and did a jumpy little dance from behind me.

He likes to call it his "I'm right and you aren't" dance.

"Well isn't that a miracle, I didn't even know they liked each other," James picked up the few brooms on the floor and shoved them into the broom closet messily.

"We didn't either, we're just really good at seeing the signs."

Sirius reaching his hand from my shoulder from beside me, his hand out waiting for a high-five, which I happily gave.

"Imagine if you were both professionals," James started walking backward, the Great Hall quickly filling up for dinner for the night.

"We'd be rich."

We all slipped into the Great Hall, I quickly departed and left for the Ravenclaw table. Amira sat at the end of the long table with a pile of papers laid before her.

"Mi?"

"(Y/N)!"

She bounced in her seat slightly, he curled following suit as she looked up at me with a large smile.

"What's with the papers?"

I took the seat across from her, picking up a paper but she quickly reached across and grabbing the paper from my hands.

"I got out that stupid writer block."

She looked back down at her journal and carried on writing, her food pushed to the other side of the table.

"Mi you gotta eat."

"I can do that when I'm dead," she waved me off and continued the dramatic writing spell she had fallen into.

"You actually can't Mi, that's the whole point."

She didn't even acknowledge my words, her pen gliding across the page with ease as she wrote about the world within her brain.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed the plant, shoving a fork full of mash potatoes and grabbing a napkin with the other hand. I kicked Mi in the shin, causing her to look up at me while one hand went to rub her shin.

"Say ah."

Mi rolled her eyes but did it anyways, looking at me with her best version of her mad face. I moved the fork to her mouth, her quickly swallowing the food and picking back up the pen and writing.

"Fuck that."

I looked to my right, Cherry long black hair caught my eye as she huffed from beside me.

"What happened to you?"

"That boy from the other night though he would tell me what I can and can't wear. Hell he decided he didn't wanna wear a condom so I can wear my mini skirts.

Cherry turned, diving her legs under the table and picking from Mi plate. Her green and silver scarf made her stand out against the Ravenclaw colors but no one paid no mind, this happened a lot more than most like to say.

"Why are you spoon feeding Amira?"

"She refuses to eat unless and until she grows an extra arm so she can write, so she grew an extra arm."

Cherry smirked and turned to me, wrapping her two arms around my shoulders.

"We wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for you."

I laughed and carefully pushed Cherry off, picking up more food on the fork and shoving it at Mi.

"I was inspired by (Y/N) and Sirius' little plan to write a story like mythology but not mythology," Amira spoke as she took the few peas that were on the fork.

"Oh yeah, how did that go by the way?"

"Fabulous, Sirius and I would make perfect cupid's," I smiled proudly at both the girls while grabbing a few fruit from the plate and popping them into my mouth.

"Well if you both need another person's life to play with, I'm free this week," Cherry plucked a grape from my finger and shoved it in inbetween her red lips.

"James Potter probably always had that spot filled."

Mi and Cherry looked at one another at the same time before nodding. I suddenly realized how many people needed some guidance.

Maybe Sirius and I could be that guidance?

"Guys, I think you're onto something."

peermanent hp tag list:

@siriusmaraudeers @marauder-exe @haphazardhufflepuff

sirius black tag list:

@coldlilheart @inkhearthes

#harry potter x reader #james potter #remus lupin #sirius black #fred weasley #george weasley #harry potter #hermione granger #ron weasley #draco malfoy #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x you #sirius black x reader

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colour-outside-the-liness · 3 years

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Hey, I'm doing good too. Just normal amounts of stressful stuff right now. Just moved to a country I've never been to before but can't complain, things are not as hard as the last time I did this so. Thanks for asking! Yeah, I saw you posting about some pretty scary health issues before, I'm glad you came out of that alive and hope you're healthier now!

The nerve some people have! Haha I know I would be pissed if people were questioning my intelligence like that especially after a couple of drinks in haha. Though I do like taunting people when I play group games, I'll be like "don't need to try that hard guys, you're gonna lose anyway" just to mess with them or just call people sore losers if they accuse me of cheating haha (they're probably right on the accusations tho). People get real mad sometimes it's kinda funny. 😂

Omg literally laughed out loud reading this! Hahaha, how did you manage to fall over a road sign then end up in a ditch? lol omg hope you didn't get hurt too bad 😂 I was trying to downplay my drunken escapades but since you shared yours I should tell you my worst one:

I was at this summer street party at night and got drunk on something made out of tropical herbs and cachaça (which is about 48% alcohol), drank 3 and a half bottles of that like it was apple juice, made friends with a bunch of strangers in a bathroom queue (who tried to talk to me weeks later but I had no idea who they were), had to be held by my best friend while I peed (mostly missing the toilet), fell in the middle of the street and scraped my knee, threatened this boy who was helping me walk and told him not to try anything funny or I would beat him up, then dragged my friends to the beach and left them shortly after to go make out with my ex, came back with lipstick all over my mouth and chin and when my friends asked what I was doing I said I was just talking to my ex and they were like NO YOU WERE NOT, hahaha then I kissed all my girl friends on a dare and we danced under the full moon, then I told my best friend I had to puke so she took me to the ocean but I changed my mind and happened to step on a dead turtle on the way back and started crying bc of it, but last month my best friend told me it was a rock I had stepped on (I believed it was a dead turtle for 7 years!). Had the worst hangover of my life the next day. ✌️✨

Ah I'm happy you liked it! I've never listened to Six musical before but it sounds fun! I can see why you like it haha made me want to dance around my apartment 💃. And hey if liking musicals is your thing then it's great, I'm sure Hozier will understand if he's not your top artist of the year. 😋 Here's my "damie" Pinterest board if you or anyone else wants to check it out, totally recommend making one if you're a visual person like me!

https://pin.it/UcHVlkq

Oh I could talk about Dani and Jamie forever I think. I love the beast in the jungle speech too and it's so painful to watch, VP delivered that beautifully, but I have to admit I'm always a crying mess from episode 1 when older Jamie starts reciting that song about being sad while waiting for her lover to return, this show is fucking cruel I hate it and love it at the same time hahaha. Omg your mom 😂 but I mean it's truly an honor to be compared to someone like Dani, no? She's really great even if she needs a little help haha (don't we all).

Aaah you're amazing! Thank you so much, I'll read this pirate AU soon!

I used to draw a lot, really loved doing it when I was a kid as I said before, and all throughout adulthood too but I haven't done that in almost a year now bc I've got a bit of a case of burnout I guess, it just takes a lot of effort to do it when it shouldn't be like that at all. I used to do fanart too, for other fandoms. Even made one for Dani x Jamie but ended up not liking how it turned out haha. I've got a lot of respect for writers and fanfic writers also! Yall can make words make sense in really interesting and beautiful ways, build worlds so enthralling I can see them vividly in my head. Writing is such an incredibly fascinating skill to have! And I guess the most important thing is that we enjoy doing these things right? Even if we think we're not particularly good at it.

Anyway, have a lovely weekend! 👋✨

Good I'm glad you're doing great but sorry you're dealing with stressful stuff!! Hope living in a new country goes well for you I'm so jealous that you've lived in different countries I'd love to live somewhere else even if just for s few years!! Awwh thank you so much I definitely came out of it alive and am feeling so much better now thank you I mean I do some pretty ditzy things so when people say it to me it's pretty deserved sometimes, I'm secretly smart and people just don't expect it so I never mind too much haha I might have to start saying the things that you do and just taunting them over it I mean, I usually do win even when they make me answer different questions so I will definitely have to start saying things like that to them Haha I love that you're just like "yeah they're probably right in their accusations" I agree seeing how mad some people get over games and stuff is funny (it's me I'm people I hate loosing games depending on what it is and I am very competitive) So it was very dark and all we had for light was my roommates flashlight on her phone but while we were walking home a friend of ours that lived else where kept texting her to make sure we were still safe (my phone as dead at this point) so while she was texting him her flashlight was facing down and someone had moved this road sign to the footpath and it was on that sits on the floor so while I couldn't see it I walked into it and fell over it but while I feel I grabbed hold of it and flipped with it and fell in a ditch with it on top of me... I was fine and was just laid laughing while my friend looked down at me and in the most northern accent ever just said "get up you dickhead." and helped me off of the floor and then asked if I was okay... and I was so it was all good!! Haha 😂 I love this drunken story that sounds like one hell of a night and is a roller coaster from start to finish!! I'm sorry you thought you had stood on a dead turtle for 7 years though, someone really should've told you that it was just a rock!! But that sounds like my kind of night!! I love nights like that... stories that will last a life time... the only down side is the hangover... luckily I have only ever had one hang over in my life and it wasn't the morning after the road sign fiasco... I felt surprisingly good the morning after that haha 😂 It's such a good musical it's about Henry VIII wives and I just love everything to do with his wives and that musical is so much fun and actually gives a little insight to the lives the six Tudor queens had away from Henry and with him because at school we're mainly just taught about him which sucks!! I loved the Hozier song and am definitely gonna have to listen to more of his stuff!! I love musicals so much I mainly listen to musical soundtracks at the minute- usually, Legally Blonde and Six on repeat haha 😂 Ooo thank you I will definitely check out this Pinterest board thanks for sending it to me!! I could talk about them forever too... since watching Bly Manor my niece has been asking me so many questions about it and I am more than happy to talk to her about it haha!! The beast in the jungle speech just breaks my heart every time I relate to it so much and VP just delivers it so beautifully!! Oh yeah now I know at the beginning that it's older Jamie I am just a wreck the whole show is just so beautiful and heart breaking at the same time I LOVE IT!! Even though it makes me sob- I keep putting myself through it!! I mean, yeah I was happy that she said it Dani is great but it was the way she said it... my mum can be something else sometimes... she said she thought Dani was like me the first time she does the accent when she says "I've fallen quite in love with London" because I just randomly do accents a lot too but it was the way she was like "She needs help... but I like her she reminds me of you" I was just like... "Should I go get help?" I still don't know the answer to my question about if I need help or not but I mean I probably do need it You're welcome I really hope you like it!! It's a

great fic I love it!! Yeah I get that if stuff starts taking too much effort and burns you out you're not gonna wanna keep doing it so it's understandable that you stopped!! I think fan art is great and I really would love to be able to do it myself but I just don't have the skill it takes!! Awwh it's a shame you didn't like the Dani x Jamie one you did I would've loved to have seen it!! Honestly there are so many talented writers out there and when I read their fics I am just in awe of the worlds they have built and the stories they have created we are so blessed in this fandom to have so many amazing writers and so many amazing fics out there Oh yeah definitely its important to enjoy what you do!! I know I love writing and love writing fics for Dani and Jamie so I think I'll be doing it for a while even if I'm not great at it haha Awwh thank you very much I hope you have a great weekend too!! ☺️

#lib3rtin33

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gloomyhearts · 3 years

Text

Always by your side || Luke Patterson

Chapter eleven~ her special ability

2020

The raven haired boy arrived back at Julie’s house, more over in her room. His eyes dared to the blonde who tried to lift a frame from the dresser. The shaggy haired boy stood in front of the bookshelf, studying the pictures. Reggie himself lays down on her bed, fingers running over the fabric of her blanket.

A voice disturbed the silence, “what are you guys doing in my room?”

“Uh..”

“Um..” they stuttered, view wandering between each other.

Luke was the first to find words, “we were looking for the kitchen?”

“This..” she points toward the band, “this cant happen. Its creepy,” her eyes now glued on reggie, “get off my bed, please.”

Luke raises his arm, “hey Julie, whats in the box?”

“That’s off limits.”

“Oh. Oh okay,” he chuckles, “Girls stuff.”

Julie crosses her arms in front of her chest, anger reflects in her facial expression.

“Oh, like butterflies and glitter?”

“Oh, come on. I'm sorry about them,” Alex insists.

“It's none of your business. And yes, there might be some glitter,” she teased.

Alex holds the frame in his hands, spinning around to his friends, “hey!” he chuckles, “I actually picked something up,” when he finished the sentence the frame fell on her bed.

“I dropped it,” disappointed he looked down onto it.

“Is that your mom?”

“Yes, and it’s my favourite picture of us,” she emphasised the favourite, “you break it, I’ll break you.”

“Okay, well, sorry but we’re kinda unbreakable at this point,” Alex adds.

“I don’t get it. You guys can mess up my bed, pick up your instruments, but can’t pick up other stuff?

“I know, its hard. But for some reason, our instruments easy.”

“Yeah, like super easy. Oh and check out what I learned today,” in the next seconds his bass was in his hands, throwing him back in the beanbag.

“Yeah, that looked super easy.”

“Can I ask you guys something?” they nodded. “You told me about your sister, right? Is she a ghost too? Did you saw her? Can she do it too?”

“Well.. this one.. this one time she.. she told me she was surfing and people could see her, she could talk to them like we do and she kinda lost her mind.”

“You never told it!”

“Yeah, maybe cause you’d freak on the fact she’d leave this dark room.”

“She what?”

“Yes, she left it during the day to avoid you and at night she came back and talked to me and Luke.”

“This means, every time I thought she'd visited my dreams again to talk to me, she actually spoke with me?!”

“I remember she said something like that earlier.”

“Earlier?” His friends asked in sync.

“Well yeah you know how she can feel my mood? So do I and I felt it earlier so I searched for her and we talked,” he shrugged his shoulder as if it would be the casual thing in the world.

“Did you wanted to inform us about it?” Alex questions running his hand through his hair.

“I don’t know, if she came up in our conversation maybe..”

Their little argumentation was disturbed by a knocking on the door and Julie’s dad sticking his head in the door, “everything okay?”

“Yeah. Im fine.” Luke let go of Alex’s hand, he had clutched against his chest.

“Okay. I thought I heard you talking to someone.”

“Nope. Must’ve been my laptop.. that I just closed.”

“Okay, if you need anything..” he points to the door.

“Yeah. Thanks.” This was his clue to leave, he closed the door and the attention of the girl was abruptly on the raven haired boy.

“Your dad seems like the kind of guy who likes to barbecue. I bet he has a great ribs recipe.”

“I don’t know. But if you guys wanna talk to me, we have to do it in the studio. He’s worried about me enough as it is.”

“He seems chill. You should just tell him about us,” luke suggests.

“You’re kidding right?” she sighs, “the past year, everyones been watching over me, being super nice, as if theyre waiting for me to snap. If I tell my dad I met a ghost band, I’ll be back to talking to Dr. Turner three days a week.”

“You probably shouldn’t tell him.”

“Julie…”

“Oh my gosh! I told you to leave it alone!”

“I know. You shouldn’t have said nothing cause now I cant stop thinking about it, so.. Whats in the box Julie?”

“It’s just my dream box, okay? Whenever I get a thought, I write it down and get it out of my mind.”

“Like lyrics?” His body shifts so he faced Alex, they both knew exactly what the other was thinking; this was like Sabrina’s green book, every little thing which crossed her mind was written down in it.

‘Where is it now? I had it in my bag at the Orpheum, I couldn’t just lose it right?’

“They would be if I still wrote music like I used to with my mom. Now it’s full of stuff that doesn’t make me sad.”

“But, I mean, you do play. We heard you this morning,” Alex raised from his seat stepping closer to her.

“In the garage?” Luke hits alex upper arm, brows knitted.

“So you were there too?”

“Uh.. I don’t…” his voice a pinched ton.

“uh he was, like..,” Reggie's voice on the same level.

“We were..”

“Somewhere.”

“So, where is you kitchen, by the way,” the shaggy haired tried to distract her. He rested his head in his palm as he laid on her bed, also with puppy eyes.

“Okay, we need to set some boundaries,” she bend down to his level, “for starters, stay out of my room!”

“Mm-hmm. Cristal clear. Let’s go.”

“We're leaving,” they made their way over to the door.

“Yes, ma’am! We’re out of here.”

Moments later Alex’s head was in the room again, “hey. Um, sorry I didn’t mean to bother you. Did you get back into your music program?”

“No.. no I didn’t.”

“I’m sorry. That really sucks,”

“thanks.” His eyes wanders around the room and silence felt over the pair.

“is that it?”

“Yeah. Yeah, this is getting weird,” she waves at him and he leaves her alone.

The band was back in the studio sitting spread across the room. Reggie tugs on his bass, Alex head rests on the drum, Luke’s eyes glued to the roof.

“You know guys, I really miss her,” the shaggy haired boy whined, “but I can't forgive her, not after all those years. I mean she ignored me twenty-five years, like.. wait she’s stubborn she can and will if she wants. But I thought…”

“Shut up, talk to her or leave it,” Alex exhales.

“that’s the point, where is she, what should I say, whats her response.”

“You’ll never know if you don’t do it.”

There was a knock on the studio door and through the window were some blonde strands visible which floaded in the wind.

Reggie sat up, his eyes laid on the door, “should we open the door? Is that her?”

“Come in!”

Sabrina poofed herself into the room but was still in a good distance to the boy.

“I shouldn’t be here, I know but.. I.. mm..”

Alex was fast on his feet, embracing her fragile body, although they weren’t alive anymore they both still had their special scent which felt like home for each other.

“I was an ass, Will. And I should have listened to you but I was so heated that you didn’t told that we were dead for twenty-five years.”

Their little moment was interrupted by the guitarist who taped Alex’s shouler letting him know they weren’t alone.

“Brina. I was so selfish and full of anger. I .. I really missed you and your voice. I’m sounding like Alex but I’d probably should had listen to you and your point of view.”

“Yeah right. It’s.. never mind. I should get going.”

“No Will stay.”

“Right, we have to introduce you somebody.”

“It’s this Julie, right? Yeah, she’s impressive, you should probably play with her, push her and all this,” Sabrina shruggs her shoulders and Reggie locked his eyes with her, a brow raised; he felt it and she knew it.

Luke’s eyes lit up as she mentioned her voice, “yeah she is stunning,” the grief in her grew and Reggie’s eyes widened. Alex looks between the two, seeing her eyes are welling up.

“Do you mind if I talk with Will in private?”

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing.”

“That’s bullshit. Talk to me Sabrina.”

“It’s just, y’all hate me and I understand but you have to understand me too. And now with this girl, I’m losing you and Luke, the way he looks at her…”

“How would you even know?”

“This morning when she sang, I was there, I saw you, her, everyone. And… and I really wanted to hug you, talk to you but I couldn’t.“

“But I didn’t saw you?”

“Well yesterday I saw the three of you at the orpheum, you even passed me as well as this tall man in smoking and black coat. He bumped your shoulder but went straight through me, it drove me crazy so I wanted to speak to you and I knew where I would find you so I came here. First, I.. I was in the garage as well but then you three poofed in and I left, then y’all were outside as well and your eyes laid on me so I thought you saw me.”

“But I didn’t.. but then suddenly you were.”

“I was, the whole time.”

“How’s that possible? Are you superman?”

“I don’t know but we’d try if people see me without surfing if I want to. I mean not Julie cause she can see you without you playing your instruments.”

“Her friend Flynn, she can't we should do it...”

#jatp fanfic #jatp x oc #julie and the phantoms #julie and the phantoms fanfiction #julieandthephantomsimagine #charlie gillespie fanfiction #charlie gillespie fic #jatp luke #jatpluke #luke patterson #luke patterson fanfiction #luke x oc #luke patterson x oc #luke jatp #julie and the himbos #luke julie and the phantoms #julie and the podcasters #julie and the fat ones #julie and the phantoms luke

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smileyoongle · 5 years

Text

Come Back Home (A Kim Taehyung Mafia AU) // Part 2

Since so many of you wanted this, I just had to write it. Can't keep my readers waiting so here it is. Part Two. And I'll definitely be writing more parts to this. Consider it a series. Let's get it!

Summary: You were dead. Or at least that's what Kim Taehyung thought. But love never dies. A myth, yes. And maybe that's why when he finds out that you are alive, he may have already lost you.

Pairing: Mafia!Taehyung×Reader

This was another curve ball that life had decided to throw in Taehyung's way. And so far, this was the most unpleasant one. Being a mafia boss, Taehyung had dealt with all kinds of obstacles. He had been threatened, he had been shot, he had been betrayed, he had almost been caught by the police but none of it compared to what he was dealing with, currently.

Hoseok wrapped up all his medical instruments and stood up, frowning at you in sympathy. You were finally asleep after struggling and resisting with whatever energy you had left. It was mainly due to the benzodiazepine running through your veins but you were asleep, that's the only thing that mattered.

With a defeated sigh, he left the room to inform Taehyung who was eagerly waiting to see you.

Taehyung would have been in the room with you if you weren't scared of him. Surprisingly, Taehyung was the one you were scared of the most. You kept screaming at him to leave you alone, as if he was the one who tortured you.

"She's asleep for now." Hoseok announced, watching as Taehyung jolted up on hearing his voice.

With a curt nod, Taehyung rushed towards the room, not being able to wait anymore. The love of his life had come back to him, what else was he gonna do?

As soon as Taehyung wrapped his fingers around the doorknob, Hoseok stopped him by taking hold of his arm. Taehyung frowned and looked down at Hoseok's hand, wondering why he was being held back.

"There's something we need to talk about first." Hoseok mumbled, unable to look into taehyung's eyes. He already knew how red and puffy Taehyung's eyes must be because of all the crying he had done. But Hoseok couldn't bring himself to see the brokenness in them. He couldn't see his younger brother so damaged.

"What is it?" Taehyung asked, his tone holding the weight of an impatient man. Without a word, Hoseok dragged him back to the couch, making him sit on it as he sat in front of him.

The others stared at Hoseok with a curious look, trying to come up with different reasons for the upcoming conversation.

"She has been brainwashed...."

Taehyung's eyes stayed the same, not reacting to hoseok's words because he already knew this. You didn't remember him, for godsake. You didn't remember that one guy who loved you and gave you all he had.

"....beyond repair."

Now that made Taehyung's breath hitch. His heart was in his throat and all hope that he had for you to remember him had been shattered. There had to be someway. What was he gonna do?

"There has to something we can do, right?" Jimin asked, making Hoseok glance at him. Hoseok sighed and rubbed his forehead before answering the question.

"We need to know what Castillo did to her. I can't say anything until then."

Taehyung sat unmoving, his fists clenching and unclenching as he thought about all the possibilities of you having any memory of him. All he knew was that he had little to no hope left but he couldn't give up. Not yet. Not after he had got you back.

"Fine. Let's go talk to him."

💔🖤💔🖤💔🖤

"Finally here to kill me, huh?" A gruff voice filled the warehouse as Taehyung stepped inside along with the rest of the members. His eyes turned stone cold and he glared at the beaten man with a ferocious intensity.

Castillo was standing with his hands chained up to the ceiling, his clothes torn and bloody along with his skin which was splattered with his own blood. This wasn't a surprising sight for anyone who knew Kim Taehyung, things could have been worse. If anything, Castillo was being shown mercy.

"Oh trust me. You don't know the things that I have planned for you." Taehyung stated, the emotionless void in his voice was spine tingling.

Castillo chuckled, spitting blood on the floor before glancing at Taehyung with challenging eyes.

"Go on. Ask me what I did to her. I might tell you."

Taehyung gritted his teeth and prepared to lunge at him, only to be held back by his gang members.

Yoongi stepped in front of Taehyung, walking towards the tied up man with slow steps.

"Tell us what you did and we might spare you." He said, tilting his head with a threatening gaze.

Another breathy laugh escaped Castillo's mouth as he shook his head.

"We all know that's not gonna happen so I'll just tell you...."

Taehyung stopped struggling as the others dropped their hold on him, their attention turning to the man who was gonna die very soon.

"I drugged her....."

Taehyung clenched his jaw, trying his hardest to keep his temper in check.

"...again and again..."

His breathing became erratic as the others glanced at him, knowing very well what was gonna happen.

"...and I tortured her. I stuck needles in her arm. I carved her soft skin with a butcher knife. I starved her. Her screams were so delightful and sweet. Made me wanna keep hurting her. And you know what I told her?"

Taehyung took a step forward, ready to throw himself at the disgusting man in front of him.

"I told her that you asked me to hurt her. I told her that you wanted her dead."

A sharp punch landed on Castillo's jaw, blood spewing out of his mouth and dripping down his chin. Everyone stood calmly as they let Taehyung do what he wanted to do. His yells and curses rang through the room followed by Castillo's horrifying screams of pain. He deserved it.

He deserved it all.

"Now I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna bring in my hounds who are gonna feast on you. Alive and Breathing. And I'll stand outside to listen to your screams. Won't that be so delightful?"

Taehyung grinned maliciously before landing a final punch to Castillo's cheek and turning around to leave. He informed the guards to bring in his hounds and let them feed on the pathetic man's flesh.

"But don't let him die. Take them away before he stops breathing and fucking burn him alive."

The guards gulped and nodded, knowing better than to not listen to Kim Taehyung. As they all sat in the car, the show begin and Castillo's screams could be heard from outside the warehouse.

Taehyung smirked in satisfaction as a tear slipped down his cheek. He had taken his revenge for you. He had made sure to bring your kidnapper as much pain as you had endured. Unfortunately, you didn't remember anything enough to appreciate Taehyung. He loved you with his everything and all he wanted was for you to remember something. Anything.

💔🖤💔🖤💔🖤

"She needs to be around someone she remembers." Hoseok stated, placing a hand on Taehyung's shoulder and giving it a light squeeze.

"And she remembers none of us."

Taehyung clasped his hands in front of him, staring at the floor as he drowned in his own spiral of thoughts. He couldn't even begin to fathom how his life had gone so wrong.

If only he hadn't left you alone in the club that night...

"Who does she remember then?" Namjoon asked, wracking his brain for anyone who knew you before you met Taehyung. Taehyung's eyes widened momentarily before he sat up straight.

"Yoona..."

Hoseok nodded and stood up, glancing at everyone with a knowing look.

"Y/N kept calling her name before falling asleep. She remembers her. We need to call Yoona."

"But-but Yoona hates us. She'll probably do something to make sure that Y/N never remembers Taehyung!" Jungkook protested, staring at Hoseok in disbelief.

Hoseok frowned sadly and looked at Taehyung, finding the younger male looking very distracted.

"It's Taehyung's call." Jin announced, waiting for Taehyung to give a verdict.

Ignoring everyone, Taehyung stood up and walked to your room, quietly entering it and closing the door behind him.

You were still asleep.

A number of bandages covered your body as your chest rose and fell rhythmically. It broke Taehyung to see you like this, knowing it was all because of him. But at least he hadn't lost you completely.

He could hear everyone's murmurs from the living room, catching bits of their conversation. Cautiously, he sat down beside you and gently held your hand in his, bringing the back of it to his lips.

He softly kissed it and rubbed circles onto it with his thumb, taking his time to look at you properly. He still couldn't believe the fact that you were here, in front of him. That he was breathing the same air as you.

But moreover, he couldn't believe that you didn't know him. That all the happy times spent beside him, had been erased from your mind.

And the thought of sending you away to live with Yoona was killing him.

Because Jungkook was right.

Yoona had been your best friend and you used to live with her before Taehyung saw you. Yoona also ran a gang but she kept that a secret from you, kept you in the dark until one day Taehyung kidnapped you. But he didn't mean you any harm. He took care of you very well. All he wanted was for Yoona to pay back all the debts that her brother owed to Taehyung.

Her brother, Minho, had been relentlessly borrowing money and drugs from Taehyung's dealers, only paying back with empty promises. It had become important to get back the money since Taehyung's reputation as a mafia leader was at stake. He didn't let people get away with things like these anyway. So why must that one guy be treated any differently?

He kept you with him as leverage, promising you that he'd let you go back as soon as Yoona paid him back. And the day came very soon.

It was a rather memorable day since you refused to go back with Yoona. Because she had lied to you. She never told you what she did, playing around with you like you were a fool. Yoona was mad at Taehyung and she blamed him for all this. She begged for your forgiveness but you had already made up your mind.

But that wasn't all.

You had also inevitably fallen for Kim Taehyung. You had accepted all his flaws and you had decided to stand by him, as long as you were kept out of his work. Unfortunately, things went wrong one day and Taehyung failed to protect you.

"Will you ever remember me?" Taehyung whispered to you, caressing your hair and taking in their softness. You were so strong for having gone through everything, only to come out alive. Taehyung was proud of you. Very proud of you.

He kissed your head and stood up, letting go of your hand as he headed out of the room. Despite everything going on, he believed in the love you both shared. He believed that someday you would truly come back home to him. He was willing to wait all his life, if that's what it took.

"Call Yoona. Tell her everything."

Taglist: @min-t-posts @annoyinglyunabashedangel @bringitseijoh @kpopgirlbtssvt @unppleased @shadowstark @bangtanniexxx

Just tagging people who I thought would want to read this. Let me know if you wanna be tagged though. Or removed from the taglist. Anything works!

-XX

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Ronnie & Joe

Ronnie: still stalking mckenna Joe: what, we can't BOTH like music? Joe: that's gonna be problematic for me tbh Ronnie: mozarts ghost aint gonna possess him in the encore Ronnie: you can fuck off Joe: you can enjoy your night Joe: I'll take my chances Ronnie: take your chances somewhere else Ronnie: or you wont have any Joe: you looking out for me? Joe: not necessary, I promise Joe: you look like you got your hands full as is Ronnie: its a threat Ronnie: shouldnt be necessary Joe: my apologies for making you work harder but its still not cutting it Ronnie: [throws something at him in a dangerous manner watch out everyone] Ronnie: we can both be into cutting Ronnie: not a problem for me Joe: [when he's probably with his flatmate or similar like they will complain honey they basics lmao, meanwhile just like 😏] Joe: careful, people will think you care Ronnie: what fucking people Ronnie: your girlfriend Joe: for one Ronnie: muzzle your bitch or give her shit to sink her teeth into Ronnie: it aint complicated Joe: I don't think not glassing randoms is exactly rocket science either Ronnie: nothing random about you Ronnie: you fucking wish Joe: you want some projection with that Joe: I found you, remember Ronnie: wasnt hiding nancy Ronnie: not still a runaway kid Joe: then don't hide Joe: I weren't looking for you, alright Ronnie: bullshit Ronnie: you said there aint no other bastards Joe: I meant tonight Joe: this is just coincidence, nothing more Ronnie: leave then Ronnie: your buyers remorse is about as welcome as you Joe: hardly Joe: that's not what it is either Ronnie: they were all out of shiny sisters baby Ronnie: take what you can get Joe: I've already got one of them Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: i remember Joe: you don't want a refill then Joe: replace the one you tossed Ronnie: you on the spectrum or do you not wanna read social cues Joe: well I ain't leaving either way but if you don't wanna make the most outta it Joe: 👍 Ronnie: keep putting words in my mouth & see what happens to yours like Joe: what spectrum are you on if you think that constitutes a please and thanks Ronnie: take it up with your ma Ronnie: she wasnt about to teach me how to play nice Joe: not really her forte Ronnie: thats why im still waiting for my plane ticket home yeah Joe: possibly Joe: I don't know Ronnie: 💔 Ronnie: how olds your good sister Joe: jury is out on good Joe: but 14 so we'll wait and see Ronnie: ill fucking drink to that Ronnie: if she was a write off shed already be Joe: depends on your perspective Joe: I try not to have one Joe: [is at bar] Ronnie: depends on your mas Ronnie: we cant all be black sheep Joe: exactly Joe: they don't really get on Joe: but she's probably just dreading the PTSD a teen pregnancy scare will bring Ronnie: should have kept me around Joe: yeah Ronnie: 1 more abortion and your country would offer me a fucking exorcism Ronnie: fun for all the family Joe: some girls have all the luck Joe: would not believe how hard it is for a lad to get one 🙄 Joe: [just putting the drinks for 'em on their table, when Charlie probs gonna flirt with you like oh hey] Ronnie: your girlfriend will let you hold her hand for her 1st Ronnie: stop sticking it in your cello & youll knock her up in no time Ronnie: [just staring at the drink like you've never seen one before] Joe: come on, she's CoE if I've ever seen it Joe: abortions? sure, but exorcisms ❌ Joe: [tryna just walk off but you know they'd be like who are you hello?! 'cos annoying lmao] Ronnie: not in ireland anymore baby Ronnie: [when you walk off like where the fuck have you got to be my dear] Joe: [at least he's not gonna drop the bomb, just being vague af like oh we met once or whatever goodbye] Joe: you gone yourself? 🛫🍀 Ronnie: on whos 💰 Joe: idk, your pals maybe Joe: but I've fucked off so he can at least top up your drink 'cos its long gone too Ronnie: wanker Ronnie: [comes back and punches charlie love you boy] Joe: [just wait 'til you have your own mindblown with that crazy connection boy] Joe: ✊ Ronnie: [gives him the biggest fuck you look ever like I can't believe you typed that] Joe: [just loling a lil 'scuse him company its not at whatever you said] Ronnie: [comes over, ignoring everyone else obvs, to drink his entire drink and walk off again] Joe: [omg stop flirting you two, everyone like what is going on tbh] Ronnie: [dancing with charlie cos he don't take kindly to being punched but you don't wanna answer his questions either] Joe: [save it for later you nosy hoe] Ronnie: [when you see his poor flatmate going to pee and follow her intimidatingly soz bitch] Joe: [this poor girl is in no way prepared lmao] Ronnie: [thinking she's about to get mugged or murdered] Joe: [when you're 18 and its your first time away from home no doubt this poor girl honestly] Ronnie: you deffo she aint catholic Ronnie: could see her in a penguin house Joe: weren't a question on the flatmate icebreakers Joe: shoulda asked for some segregrated accomodation but thought londoners were meant to be post-religion post-everything so Ronnie: 💔 it aint god its you baby Ronnie: shes no londoner Joe: no, I do know that one Joe: she's from Kent, I think Joe: or Surrey? Ronnie: not holy holier than tho Ronnie: u Ronnie: never gonna please a horse girl mckenna Joe: 😏 Joe: I'll not go there then Ronnie: charlies fucking easy to please Ronnie: youve done the 1 drink minimum & youll avoid the pregnancy scare Joe: I think he's the one that does the pleasing Joe: so I've been assured Ronnie: gets him off dont worry like Joe: I'll sleep easy now, tah Ronnie: lullabies are shit but yeah Joe: 🤞 that ain't his encore either Ronnie: if it aint opening an artery to spray the crowd count me the fuck out Joe: I wouldn't hold your breath Joe: though might be more fun Ronnie: [dramatically holds her breath in his direction like kids do] Joe: [just watching 'cos weird and into it] Ronnie: [lowkey going purple probably because you know she won't stop til she hits the deck] Joe: [just watching 'til the last sec when you obvs gonna catch her] Ronnie: [giving him a look when he does like we have to stop meeting like this but then exposing his tattoo wherever that is cos gotta check that really happened] Joe: [I hope you didn't opt for your booty, lol, probably inner bicep moment or something 'cos not that bitch getting those out at any chance] Ronnie: [just touching it like you're not shamelessly flirting with your brother okay then] Joe: [just looking at her face hardcore 'cos you can pretend you're checking her tat too] Ronnie: [when you come back to yourself and remember you're supposed to hate him for being your brother so you push him away unnecessarily hard and retreat to your corner] Joe: [go off to the bathroom yourself boy] Ronnie: [french exit while he's gone even though it'll make Charlie more annoying] Joe: [have fun Joseph] Joe: you missed the bloodbath Ronnie: made my own Joe: safer bet Joe: on all counts Ronnie: safer for your girlfriend Ronnie: & you Joe: you know she ain't my girlfriend Ronnie: no shit you dont wanna claim that conquest Joe: wrong again Joe: not gonna bang my flatmate who pays the bigger part of the rent 'cos she gets the en-suite Joe: give me some credit Ronnie: shed give you some if you gave it up to her Ronnie: but if youd rather pay rent Joe: there's no way I can keep that going 4 years Ronnie: she aint hacking it Ronnie: you can fucking smell the homesickness Joe: its like, down the road init Joe: ugh Ronnie: & Ronnie: she cant fit her horse in the en suite baby Joe: 😂 Joe: true..I'll make some rich friends to move in when she gallops off into the sunset then Ronnie: theyll not slum it with you for 4 years Joe: but I'm so charming Joe: what's the solution then, sis? Ronnie: sell yourself or kill yourself Joe: 👌 Joe: already with ya Ronnie: yeah dead connected us Ronnie: 🖕 Joe: you're the only one that's allowed to be suicidal? Ronnie: oldest cunt gets dibs Ronnie: aint that how this sibling shit plays Ronnie: whatever you wanna do ive already done it Joe: half the time Joe: but the other half is youngest gets away with it 'cos they're cuter so Ronnie: cause theyre a crybaby Ronnie: yeah you can have that soft lad Joe: 😥 bit of a prerequisite for the suicide Joe: so generous Ronnie: i left you alive so you can do yourself in Ronnie: since youve got such a boner for it Ronnie: generosity begins & ends Joe: You can stop thinking about my boners then Joe: that'll be my attempt at the virtue Ronnie: put em away Joe: you tryna expose me Ronnie: you dont need my help Ronnie: flashers keep more hidden than you Joe: really Joe: don't seem like that's something that would bother you Ronnie: youre that special mckenna Ronnie: every fucking thing you do bothers me Joe: 💘 Joe: check facebook some more, I'll keep my events up to date Joe: can avoid each other easy Ronnie: nah you see me you walk the other way Joe: I got places to be babe Ronnie: yeah a&e Ronnie: if you dont get the fuck outta my face Joe: see, you're well about it Joe: I got it, yeah, we're not family Ronnie: were nothing Ronnie: & if thats what gets you off pay for it like the other cunts do Ronnie: not my 9-5 Joe: I found Soho by myself, don't worry Joe: we're good Ronnie: boss Ronnie: stay there Joe: more expensive than Sophie's horse that Ronnie: train her up to be whatever the fuck you want then Ronnie: 4 years in she could probably kiss with tongue like Joe: you gotta ask yourself why you care Joe: 'cos I know Ronnie: i dont have to ask myself fuck all Joe: deny it then Joe: works for me Ronnie: theres no need to deny theres cunts i wanna talk to less than you Ronnie: or i that i gotta have something to do while i wait Ronnie: 💘 Joe: you're all talk Joe: say no more Ronnie: fuck you Joe: yeah fuck me Ronnie: stick your therapy speak in whatever hole you reckon can take it Ronnie: ill reverse over your head before i submit to this psychology bullshit Joe: not what I'm studying Joe: or doing Ronnie: you reckon if you say im all talk itll get you some action Ronnie: dream on motherfucker Ronnie: i dont look like her that much Joe: bold assumption Ronnie: nah Ronnie: charlies more like a brother than you & ive done everything there is to do to that tosser Joe: bold to assume I'm half as fucked up as you Joe: spent long enough telling me I can't be 'cos I got a ma and now I wanna fuck her, okay Ronnie: wearing it on your sleeve aint you though baby Ronnie: saw your arm & yeah i reckon halfs about right Ronnie: but me at 19 wouldve left you in more pieces than that Joe: you must be proud Ronnie: what the fuck of Joe: your 19 year old self Ronnie: youd have liked me better at 9 Joe: alright but a nonce joke is hardly original Ronnie: neithers wanting to fuck your ma Ronnie: read a book schoolboy Joe: that's you throwing that about Joe: not one I ask the prozzies to act out tah Ronnie: what the fuck else was your lil challenge about then Joe: what was yours? Ronnie: i didnt fire any shots shithead Joe: not true Joe: i got the 🍒 to prove it Ronnie: fuck me youre that cunt Ronnie: 1 sos & i owe you my life yeah Joe: where'd you hear that Joe: what was it, needle not clean or something Ronnie: you dont need to wait for a death that slow Ronnie: fucking do it Joe: why do you do it Ronnie: why do you give a shit what i do Joe: interesting Joe: why do you fuck with your face like that Ronnie: too late to keep it pretty for you Ronnie: should have nancy drewed this shit earlier Joe: you ain't gonna answer Joe: alright Ronnie: cant we both like pain Ronnie: is that your problem Joe: 'course Joe: no monopoly on that shit Joe: its universal, so the books say Ronnie: bullshit do you read fuck all else but sheet music Joe: not no more Joe: but i can read more than scales, like Joe: have to write essays and shit sometimes Ronnie: fucking hell Ronnie: save this riveting shit for your flatmates Joe: she does art Joe: dunno what the lad does, he's out his room less than me Ronnie: horse cocks out of clay like Ronnie: bet shes the professors pet Joe: 🤞 she gets in an ill-advised affair with a pervy prof Ronnie: every other repressed white bitch has done it Joe: my home is safe Joe: hooray Ronnie: til i sleuth your address Joe: then its petrol bombs and dog shit, I know Ronnie: after theres fuck all left to steal Ronnie: 🤡s in films 🔥💸 Joe: and eat six year old's arms Joe: crack on Ronnie: i aint bitten any kids since i was Joe: I'm proud even if you ain't then Ronnie: raise the bar baby Joe: guess the other lad you were with don't technically count no more Joe: actual kids are that annoying Ronnie: kids get to be annoying Joe: lucky ones Joe: the ones that get to be kids Ronnie: no shit Ronnie: youll be born & die a saint Ronnie: such a fucking martyr Joe: when God comes a calling, you can't refuse, obvs Joe: guess that's what she gets for not aborting you, nice bonus for being good Ronnie: yeah Joe: likes a joke as much as the next Joe: gutted for her Ronnie: cant take the scouse sinner out of her however much irish catholic dick shes taken since Ronnie: 💔 Joe: if its only paddys in heaven, I'll lose the invite Ronnie: you better stay in purgatory then Ronnie: dont want you in hell with me Joe: you're just jealous I'll be too busy getting tortured by some other demon Joe: you're alright, anguishing over my wrongs for eternity sounds like a bit of me Joe: I can hack it, more painful than being sodomized with pitchforks or whatever weak shit you're in store for Ronnie: wanna see your cum face even less Ronnie: fucks sake Joe: 😂 Joe: shh, you already know he's got that sick sense of humour Joe: your own clockwork orange moment for eternity now Ronnie: 💘 Joe: you ain't nothing like I thought when I was 🔎🤔 Ronnie: cheers for the romantic cliche you pussy Joe: you're that special Joe: and welcome Ronnie: what did you reckon id be like Joe: like the rest of 'em Joe: complete the cliche Ronnie: fuck off Joe: what, I did Joe: there ain't a bigger compliment, honestly Ronnie: i dont wanna hear your compliments Ronnie: or how big they are Joe: 😏 Joe: you asked Ronnie: cause i cant resist hearing how fucking soft you are Joe: that makes you pretty fucking soft yourself then don't it Ronnie: fuck you Joe: back here, yeah Ronnie: back at get someone else to knock you out Joe: shouldn't be hard Ronnie: depends how hard you are Ronnie: could be a turn on or off Joe: either way, its incentive for them to go harder Joe: can't lose, me Ronnie: enjoy yourself baby Joe: never Joe: if I lose my overwhelming urge to die what have I got Ronnie: new overwhelming urges Joe: won't be that good Ronnie: write it in your diary i didnt ask for your review Joe: you can do that you know Joe: they've all got profiles, like they're a shit local pub or something Ronnie: what a fucking state Joe: won't miss it when I'm in pugatory Ronnie: if i had a shot for every time you cried your eyes out id miss that Joe: you'd miss having a liver Joe: and functioning braincell Ronnie: didnt mean that kind of shot shithead Joe: your aim is for shit, true Ronnie: or that one Joe: ahh Ronnie: you had me at dirty needles 💘 Joe: s'worth being alive for, then? Ronnie: what the fuck waste of a question is that Joe: why? Ronnie: what do you think Joe: reason I'm asking Joe: if its just another slow way to kill yourself then I'm sound but if its more than that then its a potential for the repertoire Ronnie: if it was id have taken a faster way out Joe: its noted Ronnie: why do you wanna die Joe: its not even Joe: I ain't actually sad, soz to burst your 😥 bubble, IOU some shots, whatever Joe: just wanna turn my head off, not have to participate Joe: deal with any of it Joe: but saying you wanna be put in a coma doesn't quite have the same punch Ronnie: underline that note then Joe: yeah? Joe: not like I've never thought about it Joe: think about it a lot, hence the need for a fucking switch Joe: how cliche to look like I'm doing it to spite her though, eh? Ronnie: whatever you take now thats strawberry flavoured childhood bullshit Ronnie: youve found your prescribed dose of working adult medicine Joe: it don't touch it, not worth taking unless you wanna down half a blister at a time and have a decent kip Joe: get me some and I'll pay you 20% for your trouble Ronnie: come over Ronnie: told you im waiting Joe: alright Joe: if I ask for your current location do I give away that I'm not a decent stalker Ronnie: youve fucking shown that card bitch Joe: figured Joe: be obliging then Ronnie: [a location of who the fuck knows where cos we don't need Charlie or Bronson there for this excuse you lads] Joe: [when you need some privacy for your bonding] Ronnie: [when you need some privacy to shoot up your half brother who you ain't even told your other fam about] Joe: [fun and games] Joe: cool Joe: 🤞 i'm there just after the heroin Ronnie: get here before or ill be in no state to keep obliging you Joe: I'm yet to be initiated, my timekeeping skills are 🔥 Ronnie: give a shit about your cv Joe: I'll be there Ronnie: your loss if you aint Ronnie: dont come crying to me Ronnie: i wont hear it for fucking ages Joe: i'm not an idiot Ronnie: it dont matter who or what you are Ronnie: stopped listening after the ill be there Joe: 💘 Ronnie: get it tattooed next yeah Joe: yeah Ronnie: over the real fucker Ronnie: cause you love a cliche Joe: 'course Joe: have to find another dickhead with a gun though Joe: that one did not know his left from his right Ronnie: get what you pay for baby Ronnie: & we didnt Joe: touche Joe: I'll forgo accuracy for that Joe: and the dirty needle, obvs Ronnie: getting to put his hand on my tit will blow the brains he has like Joe: 😏 Ronnie: but if i toss him off thatll get shit back on track Joe: hot Joe: love that you have a plan Ronnie: cute Ronnie: you reckoning im pure chaos Ronnie: not your manic pixie dream skank Joe: ain't planning on being a composer Joe: least not now Joe: don't need to write about you Ronnie: 💔 Joe: make up your mind Ronnie: you aint on my mind mckenna Ronnie: dont get your balls in a twist Joe: do you wanna be on mine or not Ronnie: i know whats on yours Joe: same Joe: makes a change Ronnie: compose a song about your confusion then like Joe: less cliche than a love song Joe: still Ronnie: do it from the pov of the horse Ronnie: be a hit with your flatmate Joe: you just wanna get me stalked Joe: paybacks a bitch, yeah Ronnie: wanna get your habit paid for before you start it Ronnie: throw her a boner Ronnie: whats the fucking drama Joe: i don't fancy her Joe: nor having the convo about where all her moneys going Ronnie: & Ronnie: i dont fancy the cunt with the tattoo gun Ronnie: got fuck all to do with it Joe: & Joe: you're lowering standards, not getting anything up Ronnie: close your eyes & think of gear Ronnie: youll do anything for a horse like that Joe: let me try it first Ronnie: dont need to hear about your trust issues baby Joe: better stop talking now then Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: shut the fuck up Joe: [you know when its like 'removed message' that] Ronnie: 🖕 Joe: what Ronnie: i cant cut your sense of humour out Ronnie: cant live with it Joe: no funny business Joe: just a buttdial Ronnie: charlie aint here but adorable that you 2 homos hit it off Joe: just scousers gotta stick together or did you know him from back home Ronnie: he didnt give you the rundown Ronnie: mustve made him speechless mckenna Joe: too busy trying to work out how I knew you Ronnie: we grew up together Ronnie: & the mime standing next to us Joe: cool Ronnie: nah Ronnie: fucked Joe: I mean that you still know 'em, talk to 'em Ronnie: we aint trying to throw our family away for a new one Joe: like I said, s'cool Ronnie: like i said hes gonna eat that shit up Ronnie: you fawning over his family set up Joe: good to know Joe: not really my type either, call me fussy Ronnie: fucks sake Ronnie: join the god squad now & save yourself the 12 steps Joe: 'cos I don't wanna do a bloke or my horse girl roommate Ronnie: cause you only wanna do your ma Joe: you can't just give me dud options and come to that conclusion Ronnie: we playing fuck marry kill now Joe: not playing nothing with you Joe: cheater Ronnie: crybaby Joe: you'll 😥 when I have to kill your mate Ronnie: you wish Joe: making people cry is your thing Joe: I don't need to fight that claim Ronnie: like you aint been wanting to save me again since the 1st time Ronnie: thats your thing yeah Joe: save you from what? Joe: smack? obviously not Joe: other self-destructive tendencies? try again Ronnie: it obviously dont matter Ronnie: id never seen you & id still never seen a cunt more excited to do a rescue Joe: and I'd never seen you Joe: maybe you'd got all kinds of fucked up 'cos of all the shit I dragged up Joe: basic decency ain't nothing to get excited about Ronnie: i know how to self soothe im a big girl now Joe: didn't need you self-soothing yourself to death on my conscience Ronnie: didnt ask you to give a shit Ronnie: catholic guilts best left at home baby Ronnie: youll never find a place with the cockneys Joe: about myself? Joe: its barely but hanging on by a thread Joe: soz Joe: dead girls fuck you up Ronnie: not your type either then Joe: ultimate type Joe: don't wanna commit right now, tah Ronnie: 🤞 i od & you can finally sort your misery boner out Joe: too giving you Ronnie: im dead i aint giving a shit Joe: put that on the headstone Ronnie: pay for it you write whatever cliche you want Joe: you want a classy picture affair Joe: got it Ronnie: stop getting me Ronnie: it makes me wanna blow my brains out Joe: its obvious you wanna be seen Joe: no spooky sibling connection required Ronnie: fuck off Joe: what's better than ruining a graveyards ambiance for the mourners for the forseeable Ronnie: theres no room in the ground soft lad Joe: they just chuck you in with the old bones Joe: or 'move' them Ronnie: hot Joe: mhmm Joe: plague pit is the way to go Ronnie: fit the horse & the girl Ronnie: how fucking romantic Joe: that's me Ronnie: ill put john in the 💘 for you baby Ronnie: your ma robbed you blind of so many lennon comparisons Joe: still time to be pretentious with soph Joe: fuck off getting out of bed for good Ronnie: smother her with a pillow & fuck her corpse youll be feeling peace & love Joe: 💎🍓💘 Ronnie: playing with emojis & yourself aint getting you here Ronnie: hurry up Joe: can't make you any closer Ronnie: 💔

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notalk-justthought · 6 years

Note

you already know what i'm going to say ho

I sure do

Comet- What are you currently frustrated about? nothing, im enjoying my saturday morning so far

Black Hole- What are you most afraid of? being alone

Galaxy- Do you have any nicknames? What are they? yeah. Oli by some friends, then for family, Lulu is the main nickname then there are nicknames for that nickname: Lu, Luna, etc. My dad calls me monkey, my stepmom calls me sister sometimes

Star- What song(s) do you feel describes you? I don’t know, I know a lotta songs, but idk which ones would really describe me

Moon- Are you currently reading any books? If so, what book(s)? yeah, I’m been trying to get through A Stranger in the House by Shari Lapena and Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman. Then I’m reading some books for school, one’s interesting that’s called In Praise of Shadows by Jun’ichirō Tanizaki.

Planets- If you could go anywhere, where would you go? Any place with my friends

Mercury- Describe your aesthetic. I feel like I have a few aesthetics tbh, like one is artsy gay, ones like, this is gonna sound cheesy but “sunflowers and honey” lmao like nature and whatnot, one’s just dark colors, another is gay nerd.

Venus- What’s your favorite tv show? I can’t really think of my favorite show, but one I’m watching right now is called Hello, My Twenties. it’s really good so far! it’s on Netflix check it out!!

Earth- If you could be anyone else for a day, who would you want to be? There are a lot of people I would wanna be just to know what their daily life would be like

Mars- If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change? to stop procrastinating so much, that would solve a lot of my problems

Jupiter- If you had to pick one color to use for an entire week, what color would you choose? I already wear blue a lot, so that

Saturn- How far would you go for those you care about? realistically, I don’t know, I’m not one to be confrontational but if adrenaline gets to me a bitch just might fight a dude

Uranus- What would you say is your greatest achievement? getting this far in life tbh

Neptune- Describe yourself in one sentence. I’m just a girl trying her best in these troubling times.

Pluto- If you could meet anyone, alive or dead, who would you meet? Frida Kahlo

Constellations- If you could have one talent, what would you want it to be? (can be magical or not) uhhhh idk

Asteroid- When you die, what do you want to be done with your body? either be cremated and dumped someplace I liked or be cremated and use my ashes to help a plant grow

Aquarius- What’s a topic you enjoy learning about? I like learning about a lot of things, just any kind of information I can get my hands on tbh

Aquila- Do you prefer to read books or watch movies? I wish I had the attention span I had when I was younger cuz then I could actually get through both of them without getting distracted or bored

Aries- What is something you enjoy doing? any kind of artsy thing like drawing, playing piano or singing, reading, writing, a lot of things

Auriga- If you had to pick one villain from any media, who would you rather have to face and why? probably like Dr Doofenshmirtz from Phineas and Ferb because he’s a pretty chill villain and isn’t that bad of a villain if we’re gonna be honest here, I mean, he cares about his daughter, he’s only focused on taking over the Tri-state area like he’s pretty down to earth

Bootes- If you could have any animal, wild or not, fake or not, which would you want? there are so many animals… there are cats, dogs, raccoons, foxes, dragons, chickens are fun to have, but kind of expensive sometimes

Cancer- How do you want to be remembered? I want to be remembered as being compassionate and an openminded person

Canis Major- How many friends do you have? uhhhh I know a lot of people, but friends, I have like… 10 good friends, wow that’s more than I thought

Capricornus- What’s a song lyric that you relate to? I know a lot of songs and I can’t think of one right now

Cassiopeia- What’s your favorite quote? the only one that I can remember and that I used for my yearbook quote was from The Aristocats, “Ladies do not start fights, but they can finish them.”

Cygnus- If you could go back to any time period for a couple days, when/where would you want to go? the early 2000s so I can actually experience that as an adult and not as a toddler

Gemini- Do you have any siblings? How many? I have one (1) brother

Leo- If you could change the way any movie was made, which movie would you change? there’s a lot of movies I would wanna change

Libra- If you could talk to your past self, what would you tell yourself? Things will get better, it’s not going to be perfect, but it will be better than it is now. You are loved by so many people. She won’t show it or say it often, but she really is proud of you and loves you so much.

Lyra- Would you rather be feared or loved? Loved

Orion- What’s your favorite type of weather? cloudy day with the sun behind the clouds

Pegasus- What’s your favorite music genre? I listen to a lot of different genres

Perseus- What’s your favorite movie genre? horror

Pisces- Describe someone you love without saying their name. She is very ambitious and knows exactly what she wants in life and it’s very admirable. She will stand up for the things she is passionate about or when something goes wrong.

Sagittarius- What do you do when you don’t feel well? What do you eat/drink? I don’t get sick often so I’m gonna interpret this as when I’m emotionally or mentally feeling down. I usually listen to music and try to focus on other things. I eat whatever I have near me (usually something sweet) and drink water

Scorpius- If you had to pick someone to betray you, who would you pick? No one??? I mean, I guess he sorta betrayed me but I don’t want people to betray me and I don’t wanna betray anyone

Taurus- What makes you feel comfortable? listening to music or hanging out with Daria or petting an animal

Ursa Major- If you had to pick any job to have, what job would you want? Something with graphic design, but mostly just a job at this point

Virgo- What do you value the most- artistic ability/creativity, musical ability, athletic ability, intellect, or work ethic? um artistic ability/creativity

Neutron- Are you more of a leader or a follower? it depends on the situation, I do better when someone has some leadership quality about them, but if I’m the only competent one in the group, then I’ll take up the leadership

Supernova- How do you feel about yourself? she’s trying her best and sometimes she does good and sometimes she’s a dumb bitch

Supergiant- What’s something you like about yourself? I like how I am very open to learning new things and have knowledge about different things

Red Giant- Would you get into a debate/argument with someone if you heard them saying something you disagree with or know to be wrong, or would you stay silent? I don’t get into arguments often so it depends on what the argument is about like if it’s something small, it’s fine and I won’t tell them, but it it’s something political or personally attacks me, I might let them know that they’re wrong

Red Dwarf- What’s your favorite smell? What smell makes you feel most comfortable? I like a lot of different smells, the smell of garlic cooking, the smell of being in the garden for a while, coconut lotion, coffee beans. The most comfortable smell is, okay this is gonna sound weird and kinda gay, but Daria, idk it just brings me comfort

Protostar- Give a random fact about yourself. I can balance things on my head pretty well, I once balanced three discuses (disci?, it was a discus) for like a few seconds until they fell off my head (yes I did discus, only in middle school tho)

#ask #one-for-all-plus-ultra

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redditnosleep · 7 years

Text

I'm A Search And Rescue Officer For The US Forest Service, I Have Some Stories To Tell

by searchandrescuewoods.

Hey guys! I'm back from my training op, and I have a lot of really interesting stories to share with you. I've got enough that I'm going to break them up into two parts, this being the first. I'd love to put them all in one entry, but I just haven't had a chance to write them all down yet. I didn't have anything too crazy happen while I was out there, but we did have one incident with a rookie that I found relevant. Since I'm sure you guys have been waiting for these, I'll just get right into the stories. I'll assign each batch of stories to the person who told them to me.

K.D: K. D is a vet who's been an SAR officer for about fifteen years. She specializes in high elevation mountain rescues, and is widely considered one of the best in her field. She was one of the more enthusiastic storytellers, and since we were together a fair amount during exercises, she ended up telling me about four that really stuck with me.

The first she told me in response to my asking about her most traumatic calls. She shook her head and told me that really bad calls happen more frequently on the mountain, since the potential for nasty accidents is higher. About five years ago, one of the parks she worked at had a string of disappearances. It was a bad year, she said, one of the worst on record as far as weather went. They were getting about a foot of new snow every couple of days, and there were a few avalanches that killed some climbers. They'd warned people about staying on the mapped areas, but of course there's always those who don't listen. In one particularly nasty case, an entire family got wiped out because the father decided he knew better than the officials, and he took them out into an area that wasn't safe. They were snowshoeing, and as best K.D could figure, they'd walked onto a shelf of snow that looked solid, but actually wasn't. It gave way, and this family went ass over teakettle almost three hundred feet down a slope. They landed on the rocks at the bottom, and the parents died instantly. One of the kids did as well, but the other two survived. One had a broken leg and fractured ribs, the other was almost unharmed save for some bruising and a sprained ankle. The uninjured child left his sibling behind and set out to find help. K.D said the kid didn't make it more than half a mile before a storm overtook him. Kid stopped to try and get warm, or maybe just to rest, and ended up freezing to death. They ended up finding the family with the help of some witnesses who saw them heading out into the wilderness, and she was the one to find the kid who'd frozen to death looking for help. She said it had started to snow, just enough to obscure long-distance vision, but not enough to make searching impossible. She saw a figure sitting in the snow up ahead, and she got to it as quickly as possible. She described, in detail, how as she got closer, she realized first that it was a child, second that they were deceased, and third that they had frozen in one of the most pitiful positions she's ever found a corpse in. The kid was sitting upright, with his knees tucked up against his chest. His arms were curled around them, and his head was tucked up in his coat. When she moved the coat to look at his face, she saw that he'd died crying. His face was twisted, and the tears were frozen on his cheeks. She said it was painfully obvious that the kid was terrified when he succumbed to hypothermia, and as a mother, it broke her heart. She told me, repeatedly, that she hopes the father is burning in hell as we speak.

The other traumatic story she told me that stood out, in my mind, was one that happened when she was a rookie. Her team got a report of an experienced climber who hadn't come home the previous day. His wife was convinced that something bad had happened, because he'd never failed to come home on time. They went out looking for him, and had to climb what sounded like some very technically challenging parts of the mountain. They got to a relatively flat area, and K.D started seeing blood in the snow. She followed the trail, and as she went, she started seeing little bits of tissue. She wasn't sure exactly what body part it had come from, but the farther she followed it, the more there was. She follows this blood-and-tissue trail to a sheltered area under a cliff face, and she finds the climber. She said there was so much blood, more than she'd ever seen before. He was lying face down, one arm stretched in front of him, as if he'd died crawling. She looks closer, and sees that he's been partially disemboweled, which is where the tissue she'd seen had come from. The guy has an ice pick tucked into a hip holster, and it's covered in blood. Of course, they'll never be sure exactly what happened, but she said as best she can figure, this is what went down: The guy had been attempting to climb up to the next area, and had been using his ice ax to ascend. He'd probably hit a loose patch, and had fallen. On the way down, or possibly when he landed, he'd gotten impaled by the ax, and it had disemboweled him. He'd drug himself along, tearing pieces of himself out as he went, and had died under the cliff face. She isn't terribly bothered by gore, but I guess a few of the guys who came to help her remove the body threw up when they turned him over and a good portion of his intestines spilled out.

I mentioned to her that I was interested in hearing about any experiences she had with people completely disappearing. Her eyes light up, and she leans in close to me. 'Wanna hear a real doozy?' She asks. She tells me about how, when she first started, there was a case that got a lot of attention in the media. A family had been out berry picking in an area of the forest very close to the entrance of the park. They had two little boys, both under the age of five, and at some point during the day, one of them vanishes. There's an absolutely massive search, and they find absolutely nothing. It's another of those cases where it's like the kid was never there in the first place. The dogs just sit down and don't pick up on anything, no trace of the kid is found. The search goes on for about two months, but is eventually called off. Fast forward to six months later. The family comes back to place flowers at a memorial that's been set up there for the kid. They bring their other son. While they're placing the flowers, they lose sight of the kid for about three seconds, and in that span of time he vanishes into thin air. Now obviously, the parents are beyond devastated. It's awful enough to lose one child, but to lose two is beyond imagining. The search is huge, one of the largest in state history. There are about three hundred volunteers combing every inch of this park, looking for the kid. But again, there's no trace of him. The search goes on for about a week, with people looking miles from the part of the park he vanished from. And then, almost two weeks later, a volunteer almost fifteen miles from the designated search area radios in that he's found the kid. They assumed that the kid was dead, but the volunteer says he's not only alive, he's in good shape. K.D and her team go out to recover the kid, and when they get there, she can't believe that this is the kid that's been missing. His clothes are clean, there's no dirt on him anywhere, and he doesn't appear traumatized. The volunteer says he found the kid sitting on a log, playing with a little twig bundle that's bound together with some old rope. K.D asks him where he's been, who he was with for those two weeks, and the kid tells her that he's been with 'the fuzzy man'. Now K.D firmly believes in Bigfoot, so she gets all excited and asks what he means by fuzzy. Was he hairy? But the kid says no, he wasn't hairy. He was a 'fuzzy man', and he describes a man that's blurry, 'like when you close your eyes but not all the way closed.' He says the man came out of the trees and took the kid with him deep into the woods. The kid says he slept in a hollow tree, and the fuzzy man gave him berries to eat. K.D asks if the man was mean, if he scared the kid, and the kid says 'no, he wasn't scary. but i didn't like how he didn't have eyes.' K.D says they get the kid back to headquarters, and a cop takes him into town to talk to him more about what happened. She's friends with the cop that talked to him, and she said the kid described being kept in this tree by the fuzzy man, and given berries whenever he was hungry. He was allowed to wander around a very specific clearing, but when he tried to go further, the fuzzy man would 'get mad and yell real loud even though he didn't have a mouth'. When the kid got scared at night, the fuzzy man 'made it go brighter' and gave him the twig bundle. He said the fuzzy man was going to keep him, but he had to let him go because the kid wasn't 'the right kind.' He either can't or won't elaborate more on that. The cops are just sort of left scratching their heads, and the search for his brother is renewed with no results. The kid has no idea where his brother might be, and they never find him.

The last story that K.D told me was of something that happened to her when she got separated from her training group when she was a rookie. They were learning the basics of high elevation belaying on a well-mapped side of the mountain, and she had to use the bathroom. She went off about fifty yards from the group during a meal break, and did her business. I'll tell the rest exactly as she told it to me' 'So I go to take a piss, and once I'm done, I start going back to the group. But I've only gotten about five feet when I realize that I have no idea where I am. And this wasn't a 'oh, I got turned around' lost. I mean I had literally no fucking clue where I was. If you'd asked me, I don't even think I'd have been able to tell you what state we were in. It was sort of how I imagine people with amnesia feel, you know? You're completely lost, and you have no idea what to do. So I stood there for a while, just trying to figure out where the fuck I was and what I was supposed to do. But the longer I stand there, the more confused and turned around I get, so I started walking. As I recall, I just picked a random direction and went for it. And as I'm walking, it's just getting worse and worse to the point where I have no concept of why I'm on the mountain in the first place. I'm just trudging through the snow, and then I start hearing this voice. It's kind of inside my head, almost. Like if a frog could talk, all low and croaky. And it's telling me over and over 'it's okay, it's okay, you just need to find something to eat. Find something to eat and you'll be okay, just keep walking and find something to eat. Eat. Eat.' So I start looking around for anything that I can eat, and I swear to god I've never felt that hungry in my whole life. It was bottomless, and I think I'd have eaten just about anything you put in front of me right then. I had no concept of time, so I had no idea how long I'd been out when I hear an actual voice coming toward me. I go toward it and see one of the other SARs, and he looks fucking terrified. He's running toward me, asking if I'm okay and what the hell I'm doing out here. And the scary thing was, as he's running toward me, I kind of see myself reaching into my belt for my hunting knife. I'm not even really thinking about what I'm doing, but what I am thinking is that I have to eat. If I don't eat, I'll never be okay again, so I just have to eat. He sees me doing that and he backs off right away. He yells at me to put my knife away, that he's not gonna hurt me, and that kind of snaps me back. All of a sudden, I know exactly where I am, and I put the knife away. I run to him and ask him how long I've been gone, thinking he'll tell me I've been gone for half an hour or so. But he tells me I've been gone for two fucking days. I've gone over two peaks and ended up almost on the other side of the mountain, and if I'd kept going, I would have ended up wandering into about three hundred miles of wilderness. They'd never have found me. He can't believe I'm not dead, and of course I don't know what the fuck to think. To me, no time has passed at all. I don't say anything, I just go back with him to a rendezvous point and I'm taken back to HQ to be airlifted to the hospital. When I get there, they do all kinds of tests, and try to figure out what happened. As best they can guess, I had some kind of weird fugue state, which is kind of like amnesia, or a weird seizure that knocked my brain out of whack. But the truth is that we really don't know. It's never happened again, but I'll tell you, ever since then I never go out there alone. People rag on me for making them come with me when I have to leave the group, but I just tell 'em that listening to me piss in the snow is better than losing me for two fucking days on a freezing mountain.'

EW: The next person I talked to was E.W, a former trainer who now works as an EMT. He still comes to ops like this to help out, but doesn't work full-time for us anymore. He specialized in finding lost kids, he just seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to knowing where they'd gone. He's a legend among the more senior vets, but he gets embarrassed if you compliment him on his work. He sat down with me at dinner one evening, and we ended up swapping stories. Most of them were just casual, but when we got on the subject of our weirder calls, I mentioned that I'd had a buddy who'd gone up a set of stairs. He got kind of quiet and asked me if I'd heard of a little boy who'd disappeared from his park a few years back. I hadn't, so he told me this story.

They were out looking for this eleven-year-old boy, Joey, who'd gone missing near a river. Of course, the first thought was that he'd fallen in and drowned, but when they brought dogs out, they led SAR officers away from the river and up into a very densely forested area. When we do searches for people, we search in a grid pattern, and we search every 'box' of the grid incredibly thoroughly. What E.W's team noticed right away was that a very strange pattern was emerging. Dogs in alternating boxes were picking up Joey's scent, but losing it when they overlapped with another box. If you think of a checkerboard, Joey's scent was being picked up in random black squares, but never in red. This, of course, didn't make any sense, because how could the kid bounce from area to area without leaving a scent in each place he passed? E.W and his partner pass into a new box of the grid, and E.W notices a set of stairs about fifty yards away. He tells his partner that they need to go check near it, but his partner flat-out refuses. He tells E.W that he's made it a point never to go near any stairs he sees, and that while it may be routine, he's not to pretend that it's normal. He tells E.W that he'll wait in sight while E.W checks. E.W says he was irritated, but he felt for the guy, and didn't push him on the subject. 'I walked over to the stairs. They were small, kind of like stairs into a basement. I don't really feel strongly one way or the other about them, the stairs I mean, so I wasn't scared or anything. I guess I'm like everyone else, and I just prefer not to think about them too much. 'Anyway, I went over and I could see that there was something lying on the bottom step, sort of curled up. My hear sinks, because of course you always hope for the best. And we were confident that we'd find this kid alive, because he'd only been missing for a few hours. But I knew right away that it was him, and that he was dead. He was curled up in a little ball on the step, holding his stomach. It looked like he'd been in horrible pain when he died, but I didn't see any blood, except some on his lips and chin. I radioed in that I'd found him, and we got his body back to command. That poor family, they were devastated. The parents couldn't understand how he'd be dead, 'cause he'd only been gone for such a short amount of time. And on top of that we didn't have any obvious cause of death, which just made it worse. I figured he'd probably eaten something poisonous, since he was holding his stomach when I found him, but I didn't want to guess. It's hard enough to hear that your kid is dead, let alone have some stupid SAR guy guessing about what happened. They took him away, and I went home and tried not to think about it. I hate finding dead kids, man. I loved this job but it's one of the reasons I left. I've got two daughters, and the thought of losing them that way just...' He choked up a little here. I'm not great with emotional stuff like that, and it's always sort of awkward to see a grown man cry, so I didn't really know what to do. He pulled himself together eventually, though, and he kept going. 'We don't always hear back from the coroners about cause of death. It's not really our job to know, I guess, and sometimes if they think it's foul play they won't tell us because of legal bullshit. But I've got a friend who works for the sheriff's department, and he'll usually pass along any interesting info if I ask. In this case, though, I actually got a call from him about a week later. He asks if I remember the kid, and of course I do, and he says some seriously weird shit is going on. He tells me, 'E.W, man, you're gonna think I'm crazy, but the coroner has no idea what happened to this kid. He's never seen anything like it.' My friend goes on to tell me that when the coroner opened the kid up, he couldn't even believe what he was seeing. The kid's organs were like swiss cheese. Quarter-sized holes were punched clean through just about every single organ this kid had, aside from his heart and lungs. But his colon, his stomach, his kidneys and even one of his testicles, were full of these clean holes. My friend said the coroner described it as if someone had taken a hole-punch and punched holes out of everything, they were so neat. But the kid didn't have a scratch on him, no entry or exit wounds. The closest anyone there had ever seen like it was a guy who'd filled himself full of buckshot a year or so back while cleaning his rifle. No one had a clue what could possibly have caused it. My friend asked me if I'd ever heard of anything like it, or if we'd had similar cases in the past. But I'd never even heard of something like that, and I told him I wasn't going to be of any help to him. As far as I know, the coroner determined the cause of death as something like 'massive internal bleeding', but no one knows what really happened. I've never been able to forget that kid. I have nightmares about it sometimes. I don't let my kids go into the woods alone, and when we go together I never let them out of my sight. I used to love it out here. But that case, and a couple others, just sort of ruined it for me.' Dinner was over, so we started to clean up and go back to our cabins. Before we went our separate ways, he put his hand on my shoulder and looked at me really close. He tells me that there's bad things out here. Things that don't care if we have families or lives, or that we can think and feel. He tells me to be careful, and he walks away. I didn't a chance to talk with him again, but that story stuck with me.

PB: By pure coincidence, I got to talk to another vet, P.B who's been in the SAR field for years. We were partnered on a grid sweep during a training exercise, and we were chatting casually about how we liked the job, what kinds of things we'd seen, and the like. At one point, we passed an old set of stairs, though these were probably from an old fire lookout, given the area that we were in. I sort of casually mentioned that I was curious about the stairs, and that I wished I knew more about them. He got kind of quiet and looked like he wanted to tell me something, but wasn't sure if he should. Finally, he told me to turn my radio off. Obviously this is something we are never, ever supposed to do, but I did it, and he did the same.

About seven years ago, he tells me, he was out on a call with a rookie. They were in an area of the park that's had a lot of strange reports and events. Disappearances, stories about lights in the forest, odd noises, things like that. The rookie was totally spooked, kept going on and on about 'things out in the woods'. According to P.B: 'The guy wouldn't stop talking about 'the Goatman'. Just on and on, 'Goatman' this and 'Goatman' that. Finally, I told him that there was plenty else to be afraid of out here that was very real, and that he'd better get over this thing with the Goatman. The rookie wanted to know what kinds of things I was talking about, and I just told him to shut up and walk. We crested a little ridge and there was a staircase about ten yards ahead. The rookie stops dead in his tracks and just stands there looking at them. I tell him, 'See? That's something you should be afraid of.' The rookie asks me what the hell these are doing out here, and for some reason, I just open up and tell him the truth. Or what I've been told is the truth. I could have gotten in a lot of trouble for doing what I did, and I could get in a lot of trouble for repeating it to you. But you're a nice kid, and I want you to stop looking into this. Quit while you're ahead. So I'll tell you what I know, under the condition that you never breathe a word of this to the supes.' I told him I wouldn't say a word, and he double-checks that our radios are off. 'When I first started out, we were a little less tight-lipped about them, and other things that happen out here. We warned people before they were even hired that there was weird shit going on. I guess the Forest Service was tired of having such a massive turnover rate, and they wanted people to know what they were getting into. So they started having people sign these agreements that they wouldn't go to the media about what they were going to see. The FS didn't want to scare people away, so the last thing they needed were spooked rookies running off to the media with stories of ghosts and haunted stairs. But eventually, they found that the agreements weren't necessary. People not only didn't want to talk about what they saw, they wouldn't. A few times, media tried to talk to people when kids or hikers would disappear, and no one would say a word. I can't really explain it. I guess we just... don't really want to admit anything is wrong. This is our job, to be out in the woods every single day. We don't need to be spooked, and the best way to avoid that is to pretend like everything's okay. So I'll tell you everything I can think of, and after that, I'm done talking about it for good. And I expect you not to bring it up around me, ever. 'The stairs have been out here as long as the parks have existed. We have records going back decades describing them. Sometimes people go up them, and nothing happens. Other times... Look, I really don't like talking about this, but sometimes, really bad shit happens. I saw one guy get his hand sliced clean off when he got to the top step. He reached out to touch a tree branch, and it happened so fast. One second his hand was there, and the next it was gone. Completely clean wound. We didn't find his hand, and the guy almost died. Another time, a woman touched one of the stairs, and a blood vessel in her brain exploded. Literally exploded, like a water balloon. She sort of stumbled down and came over to me, and all she got out was 'I think something is wrong with me.' She dropped like a sack of flour, dead before she hit the ground. I'll never forget the way the blood leaked into the inside of her eye. Before she died, I watched it turn red. I watched it happen and there wasn't a single thing I could do to help. 'We warn people not to go anywhere near them but there's always at least one idiot who does. And even if nothing happens to them, something bad always happens. Kids go missing as we're on their trail. Someone dies the next day, cut in half in a completely safe part of the park. I don't know why, but something bad always happens. I don't know exactly why they're out here, but it doesn't matter. They're here, and if we were smart, we'd tell our new officers exactly what they're capable of.' We were both quiet for a little while. I was afraid to talk because I wasn't sure if he was done. He looked like he wanted to say something else. Finally he spoke up again. 'Have you ever noticed how you can't find the same ones twice?' I nodded, expecting him to continue. But he just stayed quiet, walking alongside me, and eventually he started a story about the biggest deer he'd ever seen in the park. I didn't bring up the subject again, and I didn't press him for any more stories. He dropped out of the op the next day. Apparently he left before the sun came up; he said he was sick. None of us have heard from him since he left.

I'm going to stop here for the time being. I'll try and post the next part in the coming days, but what with it being the end of summer, things are pretty busy here. Thanks for the continued interest, guys, you've really awakened this curiosity in me that I didn't know I had!

#creepy #horror story #search and rescue series #series

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crypticbeliever123 · 4 years

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Picrews I made of my main characters' families then put into collages.

Top to Bottom: (agender parent, 41) Vuong Nguyet, (son, 18) Vuong Quy Chien

Nguyet is his human parent and I can't make a picrew for his alien dad with the options available.

Top Left to Bottom: (mom, 47) Professor Jessica Allen (physics department), (dad, 48) Professor David Jordan (mathematics), (daughter, 19) Tiffany Jordan

Jessica kept her surname when she and David married, which made the paperwork easier when they divorced shortly after Tiffany started school. This occured when they got into a heated argument over which of their studies was better/the one they wanted Tiffany to excel at.

Tiffany is more into astronomy and computer science but does well with her parents' interests as well.

Top Left to Bottom: (dad, 40) Alejandro Velasquez, (mom, 41) Solana Velasquez, (son, 18) Jorge Velasquez

The parents were taken away by the government when Jorge was 8 and now the thought of someone else being taken from him causes Jorge to have a panic attack.

Top Left to Bottom: (mom) Ailín, (dad) Davi, (daughter, 20) Rayen

The parents might be dead in the present day. I haven't decided yet, hence why their ages aren't listed.

Top Left to Bottom Right:

(mom, 53) Dr. Zeva Martins / (dad, 53) Hahona Martins

(eldest daughter, 27) Dr. Makani Martins / (eldest son, 25) Devante Martins

(daughter, 25) Doto "Dottie" Martins / (daughter, 19) Leilani Martins

(youngest son, 17) Ahomana "Oma" Martins / (youngest daughter, 15) Aiesha Martins

Zeva is a marine biologist. Hahona runs a bait shop. They met through something regarding fish, possibly when she was still working on her degree. Hahona took Zeva's name in the marriage.

Makani is a psychiatrist.

Devante and Dottie are twins, with Devante elder by a few minutes. Because two babies are a handful, their parents decided to wait until the twins were in school to have their next kid. Dottie hates that her parents named her Doto (a name meaning second twin) because it sounds similar enough to dodo. I do not know what the twins do for a living. I almost wanna say Devante is in the NBA or something because of his outfit but I only picked the outfit because I hadn't yet decided on what age he'd be and figured I'd settle on college age where him playing basketball would make sense. I did not settle on college age... or I suppose they could still be in college at 25. It's possible.

Oma helps his dad out with the shop and loves going fishing. He was named Ahomana (meaning thunder) because he was born during a bad storm.

Aiesha's name means "alive" and since she was had later in life there were some complications and she was nearly stillborn. Her parents named her that in celebration of her surviving.

Top Left to Bottom: (dad, 39) Shakir Hamed, (mom, 38) Jamila Hamed, (son, 19 turns 20 in 1st book [have to remember to add a mention of that detail on edits]) Samir Hamed

They are a muslim family originally from Egypt who moved to Botswana when Samir was like 12 or 13 years old for work-related reasons. Shakir is an architect. Jamila is a linguist and taught her son a few things about how languages work as well as at least a couple of the languages she knows (Tswana and English). I'd say she knows at least 6 languages (Arabic, English, Swahili, Tswana, French, Mandarin) if not more.

Not sure how much of all of this will make it into the books but it's good to have in mind just in case.

I already wrote mentions of Samir's dad being an architect as well as a reference to Samir being Muslim and them having lived in Cairo before moving to Botswana. I also mentioned Leilani's dad running a bait shop as well as Jorge's parents being taken. And in my current WIP of book 2 of the series I mention one of Leilani's older sisters being a psychiatrist. I have yet to give any of the relatives names though aside from Nguyet. Nguyet is the only relative that has been given a name in the writing.

I might also give one of the other characters siblings but I'm not sure yet. Probably not Jorge or Chien though for narrative reasons. I only decided on Leilani having 5 siblings because it came up in chapter 5 of book 1 and I settled on 5 siblings.

(Sidenote, do the men look too feminine? I tried making them look like males but the picrew had basically no options as far as faces go and all the eyes had eyelashes which didn't help matters)

#my characters #my ocs #picrew

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parkyparkpaaark · 5 years

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"Tell me everything you know and I swear it will just stay between the two of us."

For the first time in the past ten minutes they've been in this cramped, dimly-lit room, Sam Wilson finally met the gaze of the man in front of him. He was never a fan of one-on-one conversations even with his family, let alone with a guy he just met. He had always described himself as a new kind of specie who is incredibly anti-social. Although there was one person who could make him talk nonstop without feeling uncomfortable— Bella.

Who is also the reason why he was in this room, talking to a guy he barely knew.

"I don't know anything."

---

The siren of the ambulance blared through the streets, turning the heads of each resident it passes by. Accidents are not a stranger to the small town of St. Jane County. But the peculiar thing was it was the third time this week that the ambulance picked up another teenager that goes to Northwest High for what can be barely called as an accident. Unless you call discovering a dead body in the restroom with a bubbling mouth an accident.

It boggled the mind of the people how it all seemed to happen consecutively, following the death of Bella Green. Various speculations were formed, some a little hard to believe while some thought it was just a mere coincidence. But what stood out the most was the belief that Bella left a curse before she died and that she's haunting the students who go to the same school as hers.

Ethan Blake, a senior from the same school, says he's had his share of odd sightings of the girl roaming the halls of Northwest High. He admits having to have had a relationship with her for a short amount of time in the past.

The stranger set down a couple of pictures of a blond, well-built, good looking guy in front of Sam.

"Know him? He claims to have dated Bella. Is that true?"

He scoffed at the mention of the word. "Dated? Now he says that. But where was that when Bella came up to him at the cafeteria two months ago asking what they were? That asshole barely looked at her before making fun of her in front of his teammates."

"How about the two people who have died earlier this week? How are they related to her?"

Sam knew better than to play games with the town's detective, so he gave in. Without looking up from the table, he began speaking.

"The first one, Paige Morgan, was running for class valedictorian alongside Bella. Both of us knew she was a dirty player and would probably pull up an act which could get Bella in trouble. And true enough, she posted a nude photo of Bella using an anonymous account in our school page. The picture was real, and I'm sure she got it from Ethan, being the only guy Bella has ever been with. I reported it immediately but it was too late when they took it down because the principal had already seen it. He was about to expel her but she begged him not to so he thought he'd just eliminate her as a candidate for class valedictorian."

The whole time Sam was talking, the detective has been writing nonstop on his little notebook, this being the first time he's received relevant information about the case. There was finally a flicker of hope in solving the mystery that's been bothering him for weeks.

He took a sip from his already cold cup of coffee, "And a few days after Bella's death she was found lifeless in her room, am I correct?" Sam nodded. "How about the other one? Mr. Travis Anderson?"

"Well Travis was a bully. I can still vividly remember getting a wedgie from him back in freshman year," he couldn't help clenching his fist at the thought of the jerk. "A few days after the issue, Bella found out that Travis was the one who sent the photo to Paige using Ethan's phone. By the way, Paige and Travis were dating during that time so you'd understand why he helped her."

There was a minute of utter silence after Sam stopped speaking. It's beginning to make sense now— the consecutive deaths that followed Bella's, the cause of death of the victims, and their connection to Bella herself. The detective thought for sure there was something fishy going on— I mean how big of a coincidence can it be that both the victims were found to have been toxicated by the same drug? But what he couldn't figure out was why the victims voluntarily took the drugs.

He was about to ask more questions about the subject, considering how much Sam had already spilled. But before he could, he was cut off by the boy, "Sir I've already shared a lot of what I know. Can I please go home now? I still have to prepare for our prom tomorrow night. I haven't picked up my tux yet and it's getting dark outside."

Having left with no choice, he let him leave.

---

[P R O M]

It had been weeks but Ethan still couldn't get over it. He spent most nights staying up all night, contemplating on the things happening around him. First it was Bella— who he admits he has wronged and no one knows how sorry he is for being a jerk to her. Next it was Paige, who he didn't really like, considering she's an entitled bitch. And then there's his bestfriend Travis. He couldn't even enjoy prom like he thought he would months ago.

Who wouldv'e thought Ethan Blake, a candidate for prom king, would be sulking in a corner instead of dancing with the other students?

His train of thoughts were interrupted when his eyes landed on a girl standing by the doorway— Bella. But how could that happen? She's dead. At least that's what's been going around the school. Extremely puzzled, he stood up and followed her. Could he really see ghosts? She is a ghost isn't she? If she isn't, how can she be alive?

Questions were piling up in his mind while he followed her to the library. She took a seat on her usual spot and motioned him to sit across her, so he obliged. No one spoke for the first few seconds. He didn't know what to say and Bella, well he has no idea what's running in her mind either.

"Cat got your tongue, Ethan?" she broke the silence. "I know you have a lot of questions in mind. Let me hear them."

"You're alive?"

Bella chuckled, "I was expecting something better than that, but yes. I am alive."

"How?"

"Ethan, sweetie, time's running out and you're asking the wrong questions."

He rubbed his hands on his face, evidently frustrated. "I'm sorry it's just hard to process this right now. Everyone thought you were dead Bella and now you're here in front of me. If I tell this to anyone they'll say I'm out of my mind."

"Well that's the thing, you won't be able to talk to anyone after this." The sinister smile plastered on Bella's face was enough for him to wet himself even though he didn't understand what she's saying. "Since I can tell you still have no idea what's going on and you failed to ask the right questions, I'm gonna help you out. Wanna know how your friends died?"

He let out an audible gasp, "You were the one who killed them?"

"Yeah. Wanna know how I did it?" she asked in almost a whisper. Without waiting for a reponse, she continued. "I asked them to play a game with me. See this bottle?" she held out a small, transparent bottle with two pills inside. "One of these pills has poison in it. I asked them to choose one and whatever's left will be mine. We'll swallow it the same time and whoever dies obviously loses," she took both pills out of the bottle and put it down on the table. "Now Ethan I want you to play with me."

"What if I don't want to?"

Bella smiled once more before pulling a gun behind her, "Oh I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you this is not optional. All you have to do is pick one. If you're lucky enough, you'll get out of this alive and I'll be the one who dies."

Ethan stared at the identical pills in front of him. There's no way to tell which one's safe and which one isn't. He could feel her stare piercing through his soul the longer he decides. After giving it much thought, and accepting his terrible fate, he picked the one from the left.

"On the count of three," Bella picked up the other pill and positioned it at the entrance of her mouth, and he did too. "One, two, th—"

Before she could finish, someone kicked the door open revealing Sam holding a gun as well. Bella furrowed her eyebrows at him, oblivious of what's happening.

"I can't take this anymore, Bella. I helped you get your revenge because I know how much you needed it. But I don't want to hear another person dying because of you. Now put down the gun and surrender to the cops or else."

"Or else what?" she pointed her gun at him and shot him near his shoulder, earning a scream from Ethan who was cowering behind the curtain of the library.

Before Bella could fire once more, Sam aimed the gun and shot her on the head before losing consciousness.

---

[ONE MONTH LATER]

"We're back in the same spot we once were, Sam. Now tell me everything that happened that night."

The detective was right, they were in that same cramped, dimly-lit room they were in a month ago. And it's still because of the same person. But this time he couldn't bring himself to say what he knew— not because he was still the same anti-social guy, but because of his fear of what might happen if he tells the truth.

He avoided the gaze of the man in front of him before letting out a sigh.

"I don't know."

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