#officially starting a Knut tag now too

[whump-it-like-its-hot]

TELL ME STUFF ABOUT A RANDOM CHARACTER RN

ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE

You rolled number…2, so, drumroll,

Knut Bjerke

Oh, where do I even start about him. Technically, he isn’t even alive at the current point in time. However, I will make exceptions to this rule :)

Knut is Agender and doesn’t really mind any pronouns, but usually sticks to He for the sake of simplicity. He’s Ace and also autistic, so basically a Triple A Battery <3

They were Loki’s partner when they were still alive, before they got murdered in cold blood. (Rumors say the incident involved a chicken nugget…)

Knut was most recently training to become a paramedic. He genuinely believes that there’s something good in every person, and does his best to bring that out. However, he also tends to be kind of a doormat. Other than that…he’s extremely allergic to walnuts. And he knows danish and british sign language. In whump, he usually plays a caretaker role, or rarely a whumpee.

[salt-is-a-terrible-currency]

I just saw your bio, why can’t you watch Vikings anymore? Also I love the new URL

Haha, thank you :) I love my new URL

As for your first question…This got long so I’m putting it below the cut. Sorry if I come across as annoyed / angry. That’s what thinking about season 5A does to me. 

Spoilers for Vikings in case this pops up in the feed of anyone that hasn’t caught up with season 5.

TW mention of rape, mention of abuse.

The quality of this show has deteriorated so much since the first season.

When Lagertha is almost raped by Knut in the first season, Ragnar later takes the blame saying that he is the one who killed Knut even though it was Lagertha who did it in self defense. The point is, that Ragnar is freed of the murder charge when it is revealed that Knut tried to rape Lagertha. It is established that he had the right to kill the man that assaulted his wife, who is a free woman. Clearly, Hirst throws this out the window later because when Lagertha’s second husband publicly abuses her no one bats an eye until she kills him. And then there’s the whole thing with Astrid that I’ll get back to later.

In season 5A, Björn and Halfdan’s storyline just feels completely out of place. It’s just…there. All it does is show us just how little Björn cares about Kattegatt and his family because he couldn’t even be bothered with stopping by to say “hi” to Torvi and the kids. This is even further solidified when he starts to eyefuck Snöfrid before he’s even had the decency to tell Torvi he doesn’t love her anymore. And his marriage to Snöfrid serves no purpose either. She speaks twice in the entire season, one of those times she’s just screaming “Father!”.

Margrethe is going crazy…No offense to the actress, based on what I know about Ida she seems like a lovely person but I don’t think she’s a very good actress. Another example of Hirst making sure that his female characters will be disliked. If you’re not a man or Lagertha he doesn’t give a shit. Margrethe will probably die soon but not to worry; there’s going to be a new blonde slave girl that’s involved with one of Ragnar’s sons.

I don’t even know where to start with Astrid. She was abducted, coerced into marrying Harald, then found out that her husband means to join forces with Ivar and attack her former lover, then she is raped because she wanted to warn Lagertha of the upcoming attack. But wait, it gets worse. She’s pregnant. When Astrid, understandably, isn’t over the moon about her new situation, Harald is portrayed as the poor sad man who was just so happy to be married and become a father. The official instagram account has tried to portray them as if they’re just this super cute couple but they’re not. I think Hirst said something about how everyone who died in episode 10 were ready to die. Bull. Shit. Astrid was suicidal, and in my opinion that’s quite different from being ready to die. Can ANY of the female characters ever catch a break?

And before someone says some shit about how rape is a part of the world and that it happens every day all over the world: I am very intimately familiar with rape so you don’t need to tell me that it exists, thank you very much. But it is a sensitive matter which Hirst clearly doesn’t know how to handle.

I can’t cosign Hirst’s shit anymore. I’ve unfollowed the official account and the actors on all social media. I might watch an episode here or there but as for the waiting with anticipation until the episode drops on HBO Nordic, I’m done. The show’s canon pretty much doesn’t exist for me right now, at least not the newest parts of it.

Disclaimer: Yes, I’ve written problematic shit too and unhealthy relationships. But unlike Hirst I am aware of it and actually try to tag appropriately and warn people. Plus I am open to criticism.

[harryjamesheadcanons]

Quick introduction to my favorite, ridiculous, super #extra OC, Aaron Finch-Dursley. 

Aaron Finch is the Muggle older brother of Justin Finch-Fletchley. 

The brothers were really close as kids, though Aaron is two years older. Their parents divorced when the boys were six and four, and their mother was remarried by the next year. Their stepdad Alan Fletchley is a better dad than their own, so much so that he offers his last name to both boys to make it official. Justin, remembering less of their biological dad, adds it to his name. Aaron chooses not to, but still loves him as much as he loves their mom. 

Had Aaron attended Hogwarts, he would have been Sorted Hufflepuff before the hat even settled on his head. He’s kind, patient, and fair enough to rival Helga herself. 

It takes hard work and patience for Justin to be able to explain everything he experiences at Hogwarts and in the Wizarding World, but he is true, loyal, and unafraid of the toil of writing out long, detailed letters. It’s harder than one might think to contextualize everything about Hogwarts, to convey the scale of the moving staircases, the history and mentality of the House Elves, Dumbledore’s omniscience, the Transfiguration coursework. Understanding it all is hard sometimes even for Justin, who lives it every day, but all the same, it just doesn’t seem fair to keep Aaron out. The only time Aaron ever sees Hogwarts is during Justin’s second year, when the family is allowed to visit him in the hospital wing after he’d been Petrified. 

That’s when he suddenly gets it - understands why Justin loves this world so much, and is able to get a clearer picture in his head of what the life of a wizard is even like. 

He has a pretty normal Muggle upbringing, though admittedly he does spend it at Eton. He has a close-knit group of friends that he grows up with, and gets on with nearly everyone around him. He never focuses too much on the coursework, it seems secondary anyway. He befriends the friendless, protects the helpless, and somehow seems to remain on good terms with everyone. 

When he comes out as gay when he’s sixteen, not one person is surprised, but everyone is as accepting as he could have asked them to be. He takes to dating wizarding boys off from Hogwarts for the summers. Eaton is such a dreadfully small dating pool. 

When Justin comes back from his sixth year at Hogwarts, saying that he won’t be able to return the next year because of highly anti-muggleborn sentiments, Aaron is secretly - shamefully - a little bit relieved. It’s gotten more and more dangerous each year, and if the newspaper is to be believed, the ensuing year in full out war would be even worse. 

When a letter from a Muggleborn friend of Justin’s warns that members of Dumbledore’s Army are going to be hunted down more viciously than other Muggleborns, Justin decides to move to America rather than go into hiding. He has some friends help him put wards over their family home to keep their parents safe. 

Since he’s taking a gap year anyway, Aaron tags along. They get a flat in Boston with a couple of roommates - a set of American twins, one witch and one Muggle - and learn the Muggle and Wizarding area surrounding. 

Aaron enrolls in some classes, and does some volunteer work to figure out what he wants to do with the the rest of his life - and ends up settling on an education major. He’s always liked school and thinks sixth form might be ideal to teach - he’ll be able to do some good with kids that age, he decides. 

He decides to take his actual credits when they get home. Justin seems to think that the tension is going to break any week now, and he can give his all in the final battle and then return back to normal life and Hogwarts like he never left it. 

Eventually, he gets a letter from the Muggleborn kid he was Petrified with - Colin - saying that it’s going to happen in a matter of days. They return home, and Justin goes to fight. Aaron and his mother stay the entire night in the Three Broomsticks, under the care of Madame Rosmerta, with some other Muggles whose loved ones are in danger. It’s the worst night of either of their lives. 

But then the war is over, and Justin returns to Hogwarts - to the anxiety of the whole family. Aaron enrolls in university to work towards his teaching degree. Life settles back into what it used to be, even though he still feels stuck in an odd position on the fringes of wizarding society. 

One day, during a summer that feels particularly fortuitous with its Muggle and Muggleborn-friendly legislature and new Ministry programs, Justin drags Aaron to a shop in Diagon Alley. 

Aaron is a little overwhelmed by all the overt wizardingness of it all. He feels a little like he’s missing pieces he should know in order to exist comfortably in this spaces. “God,” he says to Justin, after nearly knocking over a display. “They shouldn’t let Muggles in here.” 

A low slow voice from behind him says, “You wanna say that again?” 

He turns. The guy is cute, smiling a little, and wearing a smock that matches the logo on the outside of the store.

Aaron backpedals frantically. “No no no, I mean - I’m not, I was being - I’m a Muggle.” 

The guy grins. “Yeah, I know. Me too. I heard you ask how many Knuts to a pound.” 

“And I suppose you know? Justin is bloody useless and couldn’t tell me.” 

“God, no. I wish we were using pounds. I promise I know less than your boyfriend does,” the guy says, a question in his voice. 

“My brother, actually,” Aaron corrects with a smile. 

“I’m, uh, Dudley.” 

“Aaron.” 

They learn each other slowly. Dudley is hesitant to show the parts of himself he’d been hiding since the beginning of the war, hesitant to open up about his past, hesitant to let himself be loved. Aaron, though, is patient. And loyal, when he learns the truth. 

They adapt to the two worlds together, living mostly Muggle, although Aaron does help Dudley reconnect with Harry after a few years. It’s rocky, but the fact that Ginny and Aaron become fast friends - and both really want their respective partners to have peace - really helps. 

Aaron finishes his degree, and lands a teaching position in a suburb of London. He enjoys his job teaching history and government, and tries to teach his students to view the world with fairness and patience. 

Dudley gets a data entry job at a firm partnered with Grunnings. 

They rent a little house together, with a garden for Dudley and a huge kitchen for Aaron. Justin, still healing and helping his friends heal, is in and out of their guest room for a number of years, still trying to get back on his wizarding feet and figure out where he fits in the new order of things. When he finally gets a job and his own appartment, Dudley helps Aaron throw a housewarming party for him and some old school friends. 

Aaron does most of the household chores, and most of the cooking - some of Dudley’s leftover spoiled child habits spill over into his adult life, after all - but he’s okay with it. It makes him feel in control of his life, quiet and safe and secure. 

They have their issues, of course: Dudley has food issues that never quite dissipate, and lots of leftover guilt from his childhood. He has some sort of crisis about every other week about whether he deserves this or that good thing. His testy relationship with his parents and his cousins cause unnecessary tension in their lives. Aaron has unrealistic expectations - he thinks life is beautiful and is very comfortable with his place in it, and gets a little uncomfortable when that belief is shaken. He takes on the problems of his friends and family, too, and doesn’t notice the amount of stress he puts on himself that way until it culminates in him blowing up. They work through these things, though, and they’re happy. 

Dudley proposes on the spot one night in their living when Aaron mentions wanting kids during a football match commercial. He hadn’t had a ring or a plan, but it worked out fine. Aaron said yes, and within a year, they were married in a little civil partnership ceremony in the Fletchley’s back garden. Petunia Dursley cried through the whole thing, Vernon Dursley harrumphed uncomfortably at their kiss, but Harry (and his friend Hermione, since Ginny was on off flying for her team) wished them well. As a joke, Aaron throws a bouquet off one of the tables. Justin’s friend Hannah catches it, and her date’s face turns crimson, making Aaron smile proudly.

Their surrogate, Jessica, is a dream, and Aaron’s life changes forever the first time he holds little Myna Jean Dursley in his arms. He cannot imagine, in that moment, ever doing anything besides that, besides holding his daughter and watching her breathe. The feeling isn’t any less strong a year and a half later when he holds Rhea for the first time, although he’s wiser now, and knows the road he has ahead of him. 

Fatherhood suits him quite nicely, him and Dudley both, and their little family is just about as happy as can be. 

There more to him, of course, and I’m probably going to start mentioning him on this blog fairly regularly, but I’ll link back to this post so people don’t think they’ve forgotten about a canon character, haha. If you’re wondering about a visual, Ross Marquand is a great face-cast.