#oh my god the people trying to defend and justify why its okay they drink n drive

[castielfucks]

people who drive drunk im booing you. tomato tomato tomato tomato.

[impala666]

The One With Mrs. Bing Part Three: The Truth Always Comes Out

Last Part (Part Two) Friends Rewrite Masterlist

It was the next morning and Joey and you were sitting at the table having breakfast and coffee while Chandler was still sleeping. He had gotten back later last night and wanted to get some sleep before your mom came over before she left again to continue her book tour. “Hey, are you sure you’re okay?” You asked Joey as you took a sip of your coffee. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why?” Joey asked you.

“I don’t know, just last night before we fell asleep you were acting kind of weird and when you woke up you were being weird. I just want to make sure everything’s okay.” You shrugged, looking at him sweetly. It was killing Joey that he didn’t tell you what he witnessed last night. You already had such a tense relationship with your mom, he just didn’t want to make it worse after the both of you seemed to get along last night. He just didn’t want you to hear that Ross had kissed your mom. 

“Yep, everything’s fine.” Joey smiled as he got up and walked over to place a kiss on your forehead before he walked over to fill his coffee mug and you got up and made your way to the bathroom. 

Joey watched as you walked to the bathroom and closed the door when he heard a knock at the front door. “Hey, is Chandler and Y/N here?” Ross asked Joey as soon as he opened the door. Joey nodded and gave his answer, when he looked over his shoulder to make sure that you were still in the bathroom he felt Ross tug him on the front of his robe. 

“Come here,” Ross commanded as he tried to drag his friend into the hall so the other two people that would be very upset at him didn’t hear anything. “Okay, about last night, you know? You didn’t tell Chandler or…” but Joey shook his head before Ross could finish. “Okay! Because I’m thinking we don’t need to tell them. It was just a kiss, one kiss.” Ross rambled, begging Joey not to tell his best friend or his girlfriend. “Right, no big deal?” 

“Right, no big deal,” Joey played along until he just couldn’t hold it in any longer. “In bizarro world!” Joey just stood there shaking his head at the man. “You broke the code!”

“What code?” Ross asked him, honestly having no idea what Joey was talking about. 

“You don’t kiss your friend’s mom!” Joey explained loudly for him. “Sisters are okay, maybe a hot looking aunt, but not a mom. Never a mom! And don’t you even be thinking about it with Y/N,” Joey threatened after he mentioned the thing about sisters. That situation was different. Ross just shook his head and held up his hands in defense signalling that he would never do that. “But not a mom! Never a mom!” The both of them were so caught up in their conversation they didn’t see the door to the apartment open and see Chandler stepping into the hallway to grab the newspaper. Causing both men to jump an inch into the air a scream of fright. 

“What’re you guys doing out here?” You heard Chandler yell so you couldn’t help but look to see who it was, and it was Joey talking to Ross who must have knocked at the door just a little bit ago. 

“Joey and I had discussed getting in an early morning Raquetball game, but apparently someone overslept.” Ross explained looking between the three of you and smiling weirdly with his eyes darting from Chandler to Joey and then to you. And Joey just smiled sweetly, a little too sweet in your opinion. 

“Well, you don’t have your racquet.” Joey pointed out to him, trying to get him to admit what Ross did to the both of you, not that he was helping the situation at all. 

“No. No, I don’t because it’s being restrung.” Ross overly explained to the both of you. However, when Ross looked at you you were just staring with narrowed and suspicious eyes, which was causing Ross to sweat a little bit more. “Somebody was supposed to bring me one.” He quickly joked as he pointed over at Joey, his supposed Racquetball playmate that you knew nothing about. 

“Yeah, well, you didn’t call leave your grip size.” Joey knew that he could go all day, unless you were looking at him and Ross that way you were now. He could crack at any moment. But what left his mouth made your face drop in confusion and slight disgust. 

“You guys spend way too much time together.” You just shook your head at them as you made your way back into the apartment. Chandler nodded his head in agreement and followed you back inside as he closed the door behind him. 

“Okay, I’m scum.” Ross told Joey as the door closed. 

“Ross, how could you let this happen?” Joey asked him in anger. “Now you have me lying to my girlfriend who already has problems with her mom. This just going make everything worse for them.”

“I don’t know. It’s not like she’s a regular mom, you know?” Ross justified his reasoning. “You know, she’s sexy.”

“You don’t think my mom’s sexy?” Joey couldn’t help but ask. 

“Well, not in the same way.” Ross turned to him. 

“Hey! I’ll have you know Gloria Tribbiani was a handsome woman in her day, alright. You think it’s easy giving birth to seven children?” Joey felt the need to defend his mother, not realizing the kind of conversation he was having.

“Okay. I think we’re getting into a weird area here.” Ross needed to point out. “And no I don’t like the idea of you lying to Y/N and I don’t like to either. But Y/N is an adult and can figure this out herself.” But he quickly stopped talking when Monica and Rachel’s door opened with Rachel in nothing but a robe walked out with Paolo causing Joey and Ross to jump out of their skin, while Joey can feel a slight anger come over him for what Ross was saying. “Hey,” Ross greeted them.

“What’re you guys doing out here?” Rachel asked them, wanting to have her moment alone with Paolo. 

“Not playing Racquetball.” Ross explained even though Rachel wasn’t even there for the excuse Ross and Joey gave to you and Chandler. 

“He forgot to leave his grip size.” Joey told her laughing himself. 

“He didn’t get the goggles.” Ross just kept going. Joey patted himself on the head as if he couldn’t believe how stupid he was to forget such an important thing. 

“Well...sounds like you two have issues.” Rachel laughed at how weird their problems seemed to be. As Rachel led Paolo over by the stairs Joey and Ross couldn’t help as they both said their disgustingly sweet goodbyes to each other and kissed right in front of them making Ross die on the inside. 

“Do they wait for me to do this?” Ross asked Joey, to which he just shrugged. 

“Are you going to tell them?” Joey asked as he followed the guilty man into Rachel and Monica’s apartment. 

“I’m not gonna tell them. Why would I?” Ross asked Joey as he got himself a drink from the fridge. 

“How about, because if you don’t their mother might.” Joey pointed out the obvious. Ross ‘ohed’ not even thinking about that possibility. 

“What are you guys doing here?” Monica asked as they made their way to the kitchen and noticed the both of them in her home. 

“He’s not even wearing a jock strap!” Joey defended out of the blue. 

“What did I ask?” Monica asked, not clear on how that sentence had made its way into the conversation.

******

You were leaning against the counter while Joey stood on the other side making himself a sandwich. It was later in the day and Ross said that he had something to tell both you and Chandler. If you were honest you were jealous that Chandler had the chair, you felt like someone had knocked the air out of your lungs. “Oh, my god.” Chandler mumbled. 

“You guys are my friends and I just had to tell you.” Ross sympathized to the both of you. 

“I can’t believe it.” You finally managed to say a few words of your own. “Paolo kissed our mom?” You looked up from the ground and finally looked to Ross for some answers. 

“Yeah, I don’t know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink.” Ross chuckled to you. “You know how he gets when he’s dru…” Ross’s words fell forgotten when he looked over your shoulder when he noticed Joey glaring at him as he made his sandwich which caused Ross’s guilt to take over his conscious. “Alright, I can’t do this. I did it. It was me. I’m sorry. I kissed your mom.” Ross told both you and Chandler finally coming out with the truth. 

“What?” Chandler asked as he got up from his chair. You managed to step away from to counter and step forward and stand next to Chandler which was scaring Ross a little bit. 

“What the hell, Ross!?” You yelled at him, as out of the corner of your eye you saw Chandler’s face growing red. 

“I was upset about Rachel and Paolo, and think I had too much tequila and Nora, um Mrs. Mom, your Bing, was just being nice you. But nothing happened. “ You could hear Ross saying words but none of those words were making this situation any better. “Nothing happened, ask Joey.” Ross said without thinking and the hurt on your face got a little deeper. But Ross could see you turn to face Joey while Joey was trying to get Ross to shut up by shaking his head. 

“You knew?” You asked Joey, and everyone could see the slight fear on his face.

“You know, knowledge is a tricky thing.” Joey stammered, trying to change the subject. But all you could do was scoff and shake your head at how he was trying to avoid the situation. 

“I spent the entire day with you, why didn’t you tell me?” Chandler managed to ask as he made his way over to Joey. It was surprising Chandler got anything based on how much you wanted to yell. 

“Hey, you’re lucky I caught them. Otherwise, who knows what would have happened?” Joey told the both of you to try and look on the bright side. 

“Thanks man, big help.” Ross joked giving Joey a thumbs up, but immediately stopped when you turned to glare at him which was stronger than any words you could have spoken. 

“I can’t believe this! What were you thinking!?” Chandler yelled getting dangerously close to Ross, he almost looked like he was about to punch him. And you have never seen him punch anyone. 

“I wasn’t,” Ross tried. But Chandler wasn’t hearing any of it, he was just seeing red. 

“You know, of all my friends no one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you.” Chandler had to point out. 

“I know.” Ross told him. 

“I can’t believe you did this.” Chandler turned his back and made his way to the door. “I’m still mad at you for not telling me.” Chandler made sure to mention to Joey as he tried to make his way into the conversation. But as Chandler made his way to the door he didn’t want to hear anything they had to say. “Let me slam the door!” Chandler yelled to get everyone stop as he closed the door. 

“See what happens when you break the code,” Joey pointed out to Ross with you still in the room.

“I knew you were acting weird and I asked you and kept saying that it was nothing.” You finally said as Joey made his own way to the door. With that said you just looked down at the ground and shook your head as you made your way to hide in Joey’s room. You even ignored the both of them when Ross and Joey called out for you. But once you slammed the bedroom door, Ross called after Joey when he got to the door. Joey held up a hand for Ross to shut up before he slammed the door himself. Leaving Ross to stand in the living room trying to think of where he had to go from there to make all of this better.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #231: Up From the Depths!

May, 1983

So back to where we were before a detour in Annualsylvania.

Time for Roger Stern’s first issue where he can do his own thing and not have to tie up someone else’s story. Although he did a really good job tying up someone else’s story so I’m hype to see his other ideas.

And the cover is. Uh. Thor, She-Hulk, and Captain Marvel trying to beat up a tree? Yeah, take that, the Lorax.

More seriously, its just good that cover artists have gotten the note about her outfit.

We start this story when some uh swamp thing looking things march out of Chesapeake Bay just before dawn.

“They are not men... not yet.”

Huh.

The narration informs us that in addition to not being men... not yet, these figures don’t even have bones.

Then one of the things just squishes through a chain link fence.

Ah, the ol’ T2 maneuver. Good show.

The things sneak up on a hilariously yellow-suited SHIELD agent, hold him down and knock him out.

One of the things turns into the guy they just grabbed.

Whoever: “No help is needed, Agent Farber. Farber... yes, that’s your name... my name now. The master was right. Farber’s surface memories are mine.”

Then New Farber sets off on Farber’s patrol route.

What a perplexing happening.

Several hours later, now for something completely different.

The Avengers, plus former members Vision, Scarlet Witch, Wonder Man, and Beast have gathered together at Meadowglen Memorial Gardens to... well...

Vision: “We have gathered here this day to pay our final respects to a former ally... a friend who gave her life trying to end the threat of Ultron. The robot Jocasta was never officially an Avenger. In truth, we barely knew her. What joys she held, what pain she felt, we can but guess. That is our failure... that is our loss. Now, we can only remember her gallantry, and mourn.”

=(

She was too beautiful for this world.

Also, I know you already did the mea culpa on it, Vizh, but you personally barely knew her because you blew her off whenever she tried to socialize with you.

And the Avengers barely knew her because they constantly forgot that she was there.

Yeah, you admitted its your failure but I really want to make it clear what a big failure it was. You goons.

So what happened? Well, in Marvel Two-in-One #92-93... Jocasta pays a visit to the Fantastic Four and complains that the Avengers used and discarded her (which is half right but she actually ran away before they could reveal they wanted her to officially stay on as a substitute Avenger because they didn’t bother to mention it to her ahead of time).

She started living in alleys because society didn’t accept her. But she started having malfunctions that caused her a lot of pain so she came to seek Mr. Fantastic’s aid.

Overnight, Jocasta starts having nightmares about Ultron.

The following morning, Insurance Worker Aaron Stack meets with the Thing and decides to follow him around when Thing mentions he has to go deal with a lady robot. Because Aaron Stack.

Jocasta goes to the factory where Ultron was trapped in adamantium and frees him because Ultron hid a program in her brain to compel her to resurrect him. He tries to make her his bride again and she’s like ‘ew no’ again.

The Thing and Aaron Stack show up and Thing ends up mind controlled by Ultron who uses him to attack Aaron Stack.

Aaron Stack manages to get away with Jocasta. While repairing his Battle Damage, Aaron asks Jocasta why she doesn’t just call in the Avengers and she basically goes ‘i had a very dramatic exit and i’m not ruining it.’

The two robots go and confront Ultron again. Jocasta winds up wrestling with Ultron over a power cannon and it goes off blasting them both but specifically blasting Jocasta in half and not blasting Ultron in half.

Aaron Stack manages to defeat Ultron by reaching down his throat and ripping out his power supply.

... It feels like Aaron Stack does that kind of thing a lot.

Anyway, that’s how Jocasta died. And that’s why I’m sad.

The various Avengers and former Avengers all have their own thoughts during the heads bowed moment of silence.

Cap is just thinking about how many people he’s known have fallen in battle. Captain Marvel and She-Hulk feel the loss despite never meeting Jocasta. Thor wonders whether there might be room in Valhalla for her, despite being a robot. Hawkeye manages not to say anything disrespectful at all “for once.” Wasp is feeling like she lost a sister she’d never known. Really should have spent time with her. Granted, Jocasta felt weird about hanging out with you. Wonder Man thinks about the time that he died because everything reminds that guy of the fact that he died once. Beast feels like he’s been to too many funerals lately. Huh, did all the Defenders die already? And Vision is an inscrutable bastard even to the narration. Rude.

When the Avengers and co break up into smaller groups for chit chat, Beast asks Cap where the heck Iron Man is?

Cap(tain America, ‘natch) can only say that they left word for him about the service but that something must have come up.

Where the heck is Iron Man? His absence has been a plot point for several issues now.

LATER at 10 o’clock, Nick Fury, director of SHIELD, is in a helicopter with President Ronald Reagan on their way to inspect a SHIELD base where the agents are hilariously yellow-suited.

But when they get out of the helicopter, all the agents point their guns at the president.

Aw hey! And here I thought SHIELD sucked!

Okay, okay, okay. Its probably a gooey swamp plot, for some reason.

Also, Nick swears. I’m telling.

Five minutes later, at Avengers Mansion, the Avengers assemble for their regular meeting.

Except Iron Man hasn’t shown up.

As he hasn’t shown up for many meetings.

Cap wants to wait a couple more minutes because he’s just suuuuuure that he’ll be here any minute.

Poor, Cap.

Because right when Jan is going to start the meeting, they get a call on the priority phone.

Its Iron Man!

Wasp: “Iron Man! We’ve been trying to contact you for weeks! Where have you been?!? What happened? Are you all right?”

Iron Man: “Huh? Oh, yeah... I’m fine. But there’s been a lot of hassles here lately... at Stark International, I mean. The boss... Mr. Stark’s been going through a lot of changes, and he’ll be needing my help on more of a full-time basis for the time being. What I’m trying to say is... I have to quit the Avengers.”

This causes no small amount of consternation.

Cap even grabs the phone from Jan and tells Iron Man that they need him and that if there’s anything wrong, the Avengers can help.

Iron Man just says hey you guys are pros you can get along without me bye.

And then he hangs up as Thor is asking for his turn to talk.

Geez, what a weird call from Iron Man!

So whats the deal?

Here’s the deal.

Remember how Tony wasn’t looking so great last time he showed up in the book? Was kind of manic and unshaven?

Over in the Iron Man book, Obadiah Stane has been gaslighting Tony. Leaving bottles of whiskey out for him. Getting Indries Moomji to seduce Tony and then dump him. Hypnotizing a bunch of businessmen at a meeting to shout gibberish at Tony for some reason.

Presumably on top of all the nonsense going on in Avengers like the stress over what happened to Hank and with Jan, Tony falls off the wagon and starts drinking again.

He gets so drunk he starts flying around in the Iron Man armor, smashing every liquor billboard, which is funny if alarming. Deep in the bottle, Tony reveals to Rhodey that he’s Iron Man and then passes out.

Rhodey puts on the Iron Man armor and fights the villain de jour. Afterward, Tony refuses to take the armor back and leaves it in Rhodey’s care before going off to go be drunk some more.

So now Rhodey is Iron Man. Pretty exciting news for fans of Rhodey! It also means we’re getting closer to Secret Wars because Rhodey was the Iron Man in that story.

But, alas, for Tony Stark fans. Especially after having his identity revealed to Cap and Wasp, opening up a whole new dynamic among the Avengers.

Rhodey quits the Avengers because he doesn’t feel comfortable pretending to be the same Iron Man among them and doesn’t feel that he should reveal that the man inside the armor changed out of respect for Tony’s secrets.

Sooo. Yeah. Iron Man is off the team. Geez.

Stunned by this but doing her job as chairwoman, Wasp announces that the first order of business for their meeting is to fill the vacancy in the roster.

Who will it beeeeeeeeee?? -remembers the Starfox tease from last issue- Oh god no.

Meanwhile over at scene change, a scene changes.

10:15 AM, back to the SHIELD base.

Hilariously orange-suited Jasper Sitwell clasps his hands like a villain and announces that he’s holding the president ransom for...

ONE BILLION DOLLARS

President Reagan: “A billion dollars!! Good lord, man! Be reasonable! The federal budget can’t take that much added strain!”

They’ve already spent so much on the Iran-Contra affair.

Wait... -checks wikipedia- Oh okay, yeah it started in 1981 so this dig is historically justified.

Nick Fury, despite all the guns pointed at Reagan, decides to tackle Sitwell. All while thinking that base commandering this base was just too much pressure for poor Sitwell and clearly he snapped under the strain.

But then Sitwell grabs Fury mid-leap and slams him into the wall.

Nick Fury: “You... you’re not Sitwell!”

Not Sitwell: “No, but I’m a very good double, aren’t I? My men have replaced every single agent on this base! Now, are you ready to notify the proper authorities?”

So seconds later, Fury makes a broadcast to the White House situation room.

Nick Fury: “I... have some bad news, Pete. The boss an’ me are prisoners here.”

BUT! The person who got the message realizes that Bad News Pete is actually Agent Gyrich’s codename.

Which cracks me up.

And since Agent Gyrich is SOMEHOW still the Avengers liaison, despite the fact that they all hate him and refuse to deal with him in person, this is a code from Fury to call the Avengers.

So Henry Peter Gyrich calls the Avengers and tells them what’s going on and before you know it, the Quinjet is flying out of the mansion.

Apparently the launch bay is in the third floor now because the wall just swings open and the Quinjet flies out.

Neat.

On the flight over, Cap, She-Hulk, Thor, and Wasp try to strategize.

Try. Because they know where all the artillery emplacements are but without knowing where the President is being held, they don’t dare make a move.

Hey, Avengers, maybe you don’t have to be bad enough dudes to rescue the president from swamp monsters?

But since that’s not an option, the Avengers decide to wait until they hear from their advance scout.

Also, She-Hulk and Hawkeye are still bickering despite coming to a new understanding of each other recently. Peace was never an option?

So who is the advance scout? Captain Marvel, of course!

This is pretty rad, actually.

She can just turn to x-rays and invisibly zoom through the base going through all the walls she likes.

 Like, yeah, once its known that Captain Marvel is on the Avengers, I bet you can expect villain liars to suddenly start having radiation and energy detectors because of this precise sort of thing, but its neat that this is one of the things Captain Marvel brings to the table.

While zooming around, Captain Marvel also finds a sealed chamber full of gas where all the real SHIELD agents are conked out.

And the most heavily guarded room where she finds Nick Fury and a snoozing president.

Moments later, Captain Marvel nyooms back to the Quinjet as it passes Wilmington, Delaware to deliver her report.

Hawkeye: “Whew! She flew there, searched the place, and got back here before we’d flown much more’n a hundred miles! That’s some kinda fast!”

Drinking some respect Monica juice, Hawkeye?

Captain Marvel reports that Fury and the president are being held in the base commander’s quarters, behind a six inch steel door and four armed men and that the real SHIELD agents are all unconscious in a chamber on the other side of the complex.

This information is enough for Cap(tain America) to start formulating a strategy.

But meanwhile, in a submarine in the bottom of the bay. Its a mysterious figure in a silly outfit who is the one who is behind the doppleganging swamp men.

He receives a report from Simuloid-One aka Not Sitwell who reports that the ultimatum was delivered to the White House and that if they don’t receive a reply in an hour, the president will be killed.

Mysterious Mastermind: “Excellent! If the ransom is delivered, I will have riches enough to work miracles! And if not -- America will be placed in a state of chaos which I will easily turn to my advantage! Either way, I win!”

Simuloid-One agrees that things couldn’t look brighter.

-ominous thunder-

Hee.

Thor is great for irony.

Outside the SHIELD base, Thor stands atop the Quinjet, looking not at all to scale, and destroys radar towers and gun emplacements.

Good thing Tony is missing so he doesn’t have to pay for any of this later.

Actually, is this going to wind up being much cheaper than paying the one billion ransom?

Because when the Quinjet lands, She-Hulk just tears open the ground at Cap’s insistence to reveal the central underground corridor. That’s gonna cost a pretty penny.

Thor stays above ground to finish beating up people and also tanks (although he’s already knocked out half of the fake SHIELD agents on the surface) and the rest of the Avengers slip into the base.

The Avengers split up per Cap’s strategy. She-Hulk and Cap go one direction, Hawkeye and Wasp in the other.

No sooner than they split the party, Cap and She-Hulk are bogged down in a group of the fake SHIELD agents in hilarious yellow suits.

Cap: “Heads up, She-Hulk -- we have company!”

She-Hulk: “Like I said before, no problem! I just wish we weren’t in such a hurry -- so I could take the time to enjoy this more! This is the best workout I’ve had in weeks!”

She-Hulk is fun.

Over with Team Wasp and also Hawkeye, Hawkeye holds off a different gang of swampmenfakeagents as Wasp slips out through a vent to get reinforcements.

Meanwhile, on Team Monica, Monica shows up where Nick Fury is taking off his belt and Reagan is taking a nap. Her part in Cap’s plan is to help Fury guard the president.

Meanwhile but back in New York, a rocket lands at Avengers Mansion.

Since the Avengers have a security at least good enough to detect that, an alarm goes off and Jarvis runs outside with a frying pan to bludgeon whoever it is.

Good hustle, Jarvis.

But its Starfox.

Hit him anyway, Jarvis.

Starfox: “I beg your pardon. I suppose I should have radioed ahead, but I wanted to surprise my old comrades. You must be Jarvis... Thor spoke of you. I am Eros of Titan. Perhaps you’ve heard of me?”

Jarvis: “Eros? Why... yes. You were allied with the Avengers against Thanos!”

Starfox: “Ah, I thought my fame might have preceded me. Are the Avengers about?”

Jarvis: “I... I’m afraid not, sir. They’re engaged in a most important mission.”

Starfox: “Really? Where?”

Jarvis: “I’m not at liberty to discuss -- !”

Starfox: “Oh, come on! You can tell me!”

Jarvis: “W-well...”

Starfox! You’d better not be using your space charisma on Jarvis! He is an angel!

Back at the plot in Maryland, Thor, Cap(tain America), She-Hulk- and Hawkeye have somehow managed to end up broadly in the same place fighting the combined two groups of fake agents.

And considering its the Avengers hitting them, they’re not going down.

She-Hulk is hitting them and they keep getting up for more!

That’s alarming and impressive.

But... Hawkeye shoots a blast arrow too close to some of the fake agents and one of them loses an arm.

But this isn’t the modern age. That’d be too graphic.

Its only wood.

Its described as brittle wood but again: they were taking hits from She-Hulk.

And based on one of the wood agents getting stuck in a loop, Captain America decides that they’re not only not men, they’re also not even sentient.

I don’t know that matches with what we’ve seen from these simuloids in terms of holding conversation and apparently having personalities. But I guess its only virtual.

But now that the Avengers know their enemies aren’t human and aren’t people, they don’t have to hold back.

They just sort of. Start dismantling the wood men and breaking them to bits so they can’t get back up.

If it weren’t wood, it would be pretty brutal!

Back at the submarine and the secret mastermind, the secret mastermind isn’t pleased that the Avengers are overrunning the base when there’s only six of them and nearly a thousand wood men.

Not Sitwell: “The odds would seem to be in our favor by your calculations, master, but their power is such that -- !”

Secret Mastermind: “Silence! Do not speak to the Plant-Man of power! Mine was the genius that gave the semblance of life to unthinking plant tissue! There can be no greater power than that! Avengers or no Avengers, I will not be thwarted!”

He tells Not Sitwell to dispatch all other simuloids and for Not Sitwell to see to the president and Nick Fury himself.

And since Plant-Man is fairly fed up being made to look the fool by people like the Avengers, he’s not going to take the loss gracefully. And he has a special weapon to crush all opposition and he’s gonna use it!

So! Plantman!

A Mega Man robot master?

No, no. Its Samuel Smithers. Also that wood man we saw in jail last issue. But that was clearly a decoy. How sneaky.

Plantman was originally a Human Torch villain who was a botanist who invented a ray gun that controls and animates plant life.

Much like every other Human Torch Strange Tales villain, I can’t take this man too seriously. He was a grown man who devoted his life trying to bully a teenager.

Also, he joined Nebulon’s cult for a while. So. Even less respect.

His costume also doesn’t scream ‘i control plants.’ He just looks like a doofus.

Anyway, in section C, Hawkeye and Wasp have found the chamber where the real agents of SHIELD are being kept sedated. Wasp finds the air circulation controls and vents the gas.

She sends Hawkeye to go back up Cap and sees to the rousing agents herself.

First things first, she tells them to get undressed.

Dammit, Jan! Time and place!

Jokes aside, I feel like this is a shirts vs skins thing.

What with all the identical people in yellow suits and face obscuring helmets and goggles.

In section B, Not Sitwell is following Plantman’s orders. He takes the elevator from the base communications center to the CO’s office.

Which opens right in front of the CO’s office for some reason.

That just seems like its asking for trouble. Like the CO falling down an open elevator shaft because the elevator just opens right in the floor!

Who designed this base!

What happens if you take the elevator up right when someone is leaving the office and they trod on your head! This is why elevators aren’t located in the middle of the floor!

Anyway, Not Sitwell tells the door guards to cover him while he eliminates the prisoners.

Inside the CO office, Nick Fury has finished taking off his belt.

So much undressing in this issue!

Okay, but seriously. Apparently, just in case of a situation exactly like this where he’s disarmed, Nick wears a belt that he can convert into a slingshot. Including an explosive pellet that could blow down a steel door.

That’s thinking ahead!

To a weird degree. Hopefully its a stable explosive and won’t go off in case anyone ever kicks him in the dick.

Anyway, he never ever gets a chance to use it because Cap(tain America) and She-Hulk beat up the guards and Not Sitwell and came in to help rescue Fury and the president. And they give him Not Sitwell’s gun so there’s no reason for Nick to ever use his belt explosive.

It be like that sometimes.

Then there’s a K-BAM that shakes the base so Cap(tain America) sends Cap(tain Marvel) and She(-Hulk) to investigate while he stays with Fury to protect the president.

Meanwhile, the president the Reagan wakes up from his nap. This isn’t important but this is the characterization the comic is going with. Sleepy Reagan.

Captain Marvel zooms off at literal light speed with She-Hulk telling her not to hog all of the action.

But then She-Hulk finds Hawkeye who has been pinned under some collapsed ceiling after that K-BAM. She(-Hulk) helps him out but his leg has been broken.

Then a bunch of shirtless people run in to She-Hulk’s alarm.

But its okay! Its the people Jan had get shirtless! And it was, probably, for shirt vs skins reasons!

Wasp tells She-Hulk that they’ve cleared out most of the fake agents and that they’ll keep an eye on Hawkeye, so She-Hulk should find out whats going on topside.

She-Hulk: “Holee -- ! What the devil is that?!”

Turns out that whats going on topside iiiiiiiiis

A giant-sized man-thing?

No, no. But definitely some kind of large... swamp... thing.

It apparently stomped out of the bay, according to a bolt of electricity. Who is Captain Marvel. Who also reports that the giant-sized swamp thing is pretty resistant to electricity.

Which makes sense. Vegetation isn’t a great conductor, is it?

She-Hulk: “The only thing a monster that big understands is strength!”

Then she runs at it Leeroy Jenkins style and gets stomped.

So thaaaaaaaat explains that cover. Good to know, good to know.

She-Hulk is strong enough to start lifting the foot off of her and Thor makes it even easier by smashing the monster in the leg, making ti topple to the ground.

Then Captain Marvel basically turns into a laser and bounces all over the monster, carving bits off.

Problem: This thing works under Sorcerer’s Apprentice rules.

Every piece chopped off becomes an angry tree man.

Those are some angry Ents.

Which unfortunately puts the Avengers right back where they started vis having a small army of angry wood men they have to beat up.

... Son of a damn is the giant-sized swamp thing an asteroids monster? You beat him into smaller monsters and have to beat those into monsters too small to be a threat anymore?

Dammit, Plantman!

She-Hulk points out the obvious that Captain Marvel can just set all the wood men on fire.

Which she does. She just starts emitting infrared radiation until a miniature, ambulatory forest fire starts.

Plantman: “This can’t be! They’re destroying my mightiest creation! What next?”

What next is that a rocket hits the giant-sized swamp thing in the face, destroying it.

Annnnd out pops Starfox.

Trading one problem for another.

Ha ha.

Ok, maybe he’s not actually so bad. We’ll see.

With the giant-sized swamp thing destroyed, Plantman flees the scene in his submarine. Luckily smart enough to not have shown his face so the Avengers don’t know he was involved.

Order is restored to the base and all the agents put their shirts back on, presumably to Jan’s chagrin.

President Reagan is grandfatherly or whatever and instead of complaining about this laughably massive security breach, just raises SHIELD’s budget so they can plug this swamp slime hole in their security.

And I’m surrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre SHIELD will never have massive security breaches everrrrrrrrrrrrrr again.

Then again, he slept through most of the story so I’m sure he has no idea what happened.

And apparently Captain Marvel was moved from trainee to full, active Avenger at some point between issues.

Everyone pats her back and tells her that she did a good job, which she did do.

Starfox slides into the conversation and also adds his congratulations, slightly flirtily.

Captain Marvel is like holy shit an alien. What are you doing on Earth?

Starfox: “Why, I should think it’s obvious! I’ve come to join the Avengers!”

Everyone: “WHAT?!”

Hawkeye: -facepalm- Oh, no!

Womp, womp!

Heh. I’m amused that the Avengers have a similar reaction to me about this guy showing up to join the team.

So as Stern’s first issue not completing someone else’s story? Very good job, Stern. This was fun.

The characters were used effectively. The plot was fresh. Hawkeye’s leg got broken.

You’re doing a really good job!

Follow @essential-avengers​ because together we can make fun of Starfox much more effectively. Also like and reblog to let me do I’m doing a good job.

[desiraypark]

When the Sun Sleeps in Canto Bight [5]

Previous Entire Work CHAPTER PLAYERS

The Knights of Ren: Ushar, Cardo, Trudgen, Ap’lek, Vicrul aka “Vic”, and Kuruk) Kylo Ren, Leader of the Knights of Ren Ruby Girard, The Beautiful Singer CHAPTER CONTENT N*FW -| Sexual content; mention of sex work; alcohol; language; back-story Additional Notes: Galactic Standard Calendar | 1920s Stockings, Tights, Nylons, Socks History by Vintage Dancer (scroll down to see how women of color (particularly Black women) wore their stockings) Word Count: 2,721

“I don’t get it. You fuck ‘em good, you give ‘em money and nice clothes—put ‘em up in a nice place, and they still aren’t satisfied. If I was a broad, I would be a-fuckin’ okay,” Ushar said, leaning back in a chair and smoking a cigarette. “She wants the ring, man. She wants the ring,” Cardo said. He was cleaning his gun. “Well, I’ve got a damn wife! Shit!” Ushar proclaimed. The Knights of Ren—all but Kylo, Vic, and Kuruk—were sitting in office of The Garden Lounge—their flagship establishment for over thirty years. It was a placed that lived up to its name: beautiful plant décor in the lounge; sky blue walls and plush brown carpeting—girls dressed in just enough to not be obscene, but just a little to remind you of “nature”, if you will. Vic was out front entertaining guests and Kuruk was manning the office. Trudgen was leaning against the teak-wood desk, downing a glass of whiskey, while Ap’lek was stretched out across the chaise. Finally, Kylo came in. 

“Evening, fellas,” Kylo said. “Evening,” they responded. “Where’s Vic?” Kylo asked as he sat behind his desk. “Minglin’,” Ap’lek answered. “Do you have your fuckin’ shoes on my couch?” Kylo asked. Ap’lek sat up and planted his feet on the floor. “Sorry, Boss.” “What’s goin’ on with the wife?” Kylo asked Ushar. He shook his head. “Wife’s fine. It’s the other one that’s bein’ a fuckin’ brat,” he responded.    “Why don’t you get rid of her?” Kylo asked, organizing things that didn’t need organizing on his desk. “Pussy’s too good, man.” The Knights chuckled. “Can somebody get—” Kylo started. At that moment, Vic walked through the door and left it open. Kuruk stood outside but stayed close enough to the office to hear what was going on. Vic sat beside Ushar, and Trudgen sat beside Ap’lek on the sofa. Kylo looked up at Kuruk and waved him in. “Come on in, Kuruk. Nobody’s gonna barge in here,” he said. Kuruk nodded, closed the door, and leaned against the wall beside it. “What’s goin’ on, fellas? Ap’lek, anything you wanna discuss?” Kylo asked. “Nope.” “I hear the Kesyk gang’s got a hold of some new toys. Automatic. Fast,” Cardo chimed in. “What makes ‘em special?” Kylo asked. “Faster. More precise. Lightweight,” Cardo answered. “Interesting. Look into it. How’s tricks?” “Steady,” Ushar answered. “The johns are startin’ to get a little bold, though. One of ‘em got a little rough with Hela and she cut him.” “Why can’t these bastards shoot their fuckin’ nut and leave?” Kylo asked. “How’s Hela?” “You know her. She’s cool but she said she’ll do it again,” Ushar answered. “As she fuckin’ should.

“Yeah, but--you think that would drive men away?” Ushar asked. “These fuckin’ johns would step over alligators to get some ass. And they know we’ve got the best fuckin’ girls and guys in Canto Bight. If they act like they have some sense, they ain’t gotta worry about nobody pullin’ no fuckin’ blades on ‘em.”

Ushar shrugged in reluctant agreement, and Vic smiled to himself. 

 The booze?” Kylo asked. 

“Booze is flowin’. Hearin’ more complaints from South Side, though,” Vic answered. “They still waterin’ the shit down?” Kylo asked. “No. This time they’re puttin’ in too much,” Vic answered. 

“People goin’ in for a couple of drinks and walkin’ out eatin’ the fuckin’ concrete,” Trudgen chimed in. He polished off his whiskey. “Fuckin’ idiots. I guess the only thing we can do is give them a fuckin’ recipe book or somethin’,” Kylo said. “Anything else goin’ on?” “Nope/No, boss,” the Knights said in unison. Vic cleared his throat. “There is one thing. Ren’s cousin reached out to me,” he said. “Sheev? That fuckin’ weirdo. What does he want?” “He was very vague. Said he wanted to discuss business and his “retirement”. Said to swing by the Death Star anytime. I was thinking Primeday? Around 2?” Vic suggested. “No can do. Got plans on Primeday. Centaxday. Afternoon.” Vic nodded. **********************

PRIMEDAY 

Kylo had spent the afternoon before dreaming up the perfect Primeday dinner. Everything usually closed or closed early on Primeday, so he had to think fast. Once he got an idea, he made his list and headed out to the markets—the butcher for lamb chops; the produce vendor for potatoes, mushrooms, lemons, and carrots. He’d even snatched a bottle of wine from the Garden Lounge’s inventory, and bought a chocolate cake from the bakery. Ruby agreed to be picked up at three. 

When Kylo pulled up at about 2:55, Ruby stood outside her building wearing another pink dress, blue baby doll heels, white stockings, and holding a white clutch in her hand. Thick curls peeped out of her white cloche hat. As she walked to the car, he climbed out and lifted his hands. “What the fuck are you doing?” he asked. Ruby froze. “What?” “You’re supposed to wait for me to come to your fuckin’ door,” he said. Ruby shook her head and kept walking, and he walked toward her. She looked him over—his tall figure dressed from head to toe in black: black trousers, black shirt, black vest, black oxfords. “I just thought it would be more convenient for me to wait outside for you,” she fibbed. Truth was, she didn’t want Crystal sizing him up and asking him questions. Kylo took her hand and led her to the car.  

Kylo had called Ruby’s building a dump. His building was nice, but so lifeless and empty. No art on the walls; no flowers. His own apartment was similar. Clean. Very clean and neat. But no art. No colorful accents to catch your eye. He had a gramophone but owned no records. At least he had a radio. After he’d poured her a glass of wine in his tiny kitchen, she’d taken it upon herself to go into the living room and turn it on. Then, she got a better look at the place—no pictures. Just a burgundy couch that appeared to never have been sat on and a dining table with only two chairs in the corner. “You gonna leave me in here by myself, Babydoll?” Kylo called from the kitchen. Ruby smiled and walked back into the kitchen. Kylo had taken off his vest and rolled up his sleeves. He was standing over his stove, putting potatoes into a pot of water. Then, he went into the icebox and pulled out a thick piece of brown paper—stuffed with something. Ruby leaned against the counter and watched him work, trying to bite down a smile. “Tell me about yourself,” he requested. Ruby took a sip of her wine. “You first.” She saw his chest rise and fall, trapping a chuckle. “What do you wanna know?” Ruby thought back to the things Crystal told her. Where to start? Why did he call himself Kylo Ren if he was a Solo? An Organa? She chose to point at the most intriguing target. “Did you try to kill your father?” she asked. Kylo dropped pieces of meat into a bowl he’d filled with water. “I didn’t try to kill him. We got into a fight. He was winning. I pulled a knife on him to scare him off.” Ruby’s jaw dropped. “Oh…” Kylo didn’t continue. “May I ask what the fight was about?” Kylo sighed. He grabbed a bottle of vinegar from his cupboard and poured some into the bowl. 

“I’d been out with some friends. Fuckin’ around. Stayed the night with some br--some girl--and didn’t come home until the next morning. I was 18. Thought I was a man. My dad wouldn’t let me inside. Told me I was falling to the Dark Side...that I needed to repent and start coming to sanctuary with him, yada-yada-yada. I told him to shove his sanctuary up his ass and we just started brawlin’ in front of the neighbors.” “So, you’ve always been a little smart mouth,” Ruby joked. Kylo laughed. “Not always. I was just tired of people telling me what to do.” Ruby put her wine glass on the counter, grabbed the edge, then lifted herself to sit high. Then, she yanked off her hat and fluffed her hair. “What did your mom have to say about all of this?” she asked. “She did what she usually did. Defended me in front of him. Because she hates him just as much as I do. But told me how much of a disappoint I was to her behind closed doors.” Ruby’s watched Kylo move about in silence--moving the meat around in the bowl. Everything was making sense. The typical tale—poor little rich boy, rebellious and angry. He glanced at her, then avoided her sympathetic stare--placing his eyes on the pot of boiling potatoes instead. 

“I’m sorry you went through that,” she said. He shrugged and washed his hands.

"Eh. I’m over it. It was a long time ago,” he said. He dried his hands on a towel, then poured himself a glass of wine. “Your turn,” he said as he poured. 

“What do you want to know?” Ruby asked, echoing him. “Tell me about your parents.” He rested his hip against the counter and took a sip.

“I think…my mom is essentially your dad,” she said with chuckle. “Everything is dark-sided to her. Singing about anything unrelated to the gods. The radio. Picture shows. Lipstick. She didn’t have to put me out. As soon as I turned 18, I was outta there.” Kylo listened to Ruby speak, but found himself getting lost in her--her hands that moved with every word she said; brown legs that lifted by the knee when the edge of the counter started cutting off her circulation. Even when she talked, there seemed to be a melody in her voice. She spoke highly of her father—apparently he was a laid-back and funny man—and she justified her mother’s puritan ways by admission of her being protective and caring. “So, mom wouldn’t think too highly of me, huh?” Kylo asked. “Oh, she’d probably melt into a puddle, she’d be so incensed,” Ruby said with a laugh. She guzzled the remainder of her wine. Ruby’s laugh made him smile. He tapped his fingers against his wine glass. “What does Ruby think about me?” he asked. A stillness fell over her. She stared at Kylo’s face—dark eyes boring into her; long waves draped over the side of his face as the result of a side part. Her eyes fell onto the stitches on his cheek, then back at his irises. “I think you’re impulsive and hot-headed,” she said. Kylo rolled his eyes and smirked. “…and passionate. Maybe even loyal...in search of something…” Potatoes began to knock against each other in the pot. Kylo stared into Ruby’s eyes, then at her painted lips. They parted just a centimeter, as though tired of being pressed together. Tired of not being touched. Kylo leaned in close and stopped. Ruby traveled the rest of the space and pressed her lips to his. He moved to stand directly in front of her and held the nape of her neck, pulling her closer as she rested her hands on his waist. He stopped kissing her but didn’t pull his face away. “You want me to stop?” he asked breathlessly. His heart was pounding and he silently prayed that she said “no”. “No,” she said. Kylo pressed his lips back against hers and ran his hand up her thigh. She held the back of his neck and deepened their kiss—pushing her tongue into his mouth. He let her tongue in, and the hand that was on her neck, moved up to grab a handful of her curls. Ruby moaned into his mouth and opened her knees. The feeling of Ruby’s knees moving against him made Kylo stiffen. His hand moved further up her thigh, and in between them. He slipped two fingers past the seat of her panties and rubbed them against her outer lips. Then, he rubbed his way to her warm core and pushed them inside. Ruby pulled her face away and rested her head against the cupboard. Her eyes were wide. “Your fingers are big,” she said with shock in her voice. Kylo smiled and kept fingering. He pushed her left knee open some more, then watched her face crinkle. She closed her eyes and bit down on her lip—allowing ecstasy to overtake her. Then, he stopped fingering her and bent at his waist. Just as he did so, the water on the stove began to boil harder. He jumped up—annoyed at the stove for doing its job—turned the burner off, yanked Ruby’s panties down, and put them in his pants pocket. Then, he pushed back the skirt of Ruby’s dress. She tilted to the left to lift the right hem, then tilted to the right to lift the left—revealing the hooked garters that pressed into her fleshy thighs and held her nylons up. She let the bottom of her dress bunch at her waist.

Kylo stared at her vulva—everything. The lips; the slit leaking from its top and probably down to her core with arousal; the brown rosebud that was fighting to be seen. Ruby pressed her palms against the counter and opened her legs more. Kylo smirked. “Anxious?” he asked. “Yes. I am,” she answered—breath loud, hot, and sure. Kylo bent at the waist and turned his body to the side. He dipped his head between Ruby’s inner thighs, and without hesitation, rapidly flicked his pointed tongue against her clit. Ruby cried out and grabbed a handful of his hair, moaning as he lapped her up. He didn’t abandon an inch of her—tongue venturing around, over, and inside of her—causing her to grind against his face. With a mouth full of pussy, he stared up at her, ego steadily growing with every squirm, every twitch of her brow and every bite of her lip. When he stuck his fingers back inside, she tightened her grip against his scalp and finally looked down at him. The sight of him looking up at her with darkened eyes made her own eyes close again, but he put space between his lips and her flesh. “Look at me when you come,” he said. A chill went down Ruby’s spine and she looked down into Kylo’s eyes. He inserted a third finger and massaged her walls as he sucked and ravaged her clit. Suddenly, he felt her contracting over his fingers. Her jaw dropped and a strained sound left her throat. Then, she let out an endless high-pitched moan and tried to pull away from his lips—but Kylo didn’t stop until his tongue absorbed the very last drop of her sweet cum. She fell backward and rested her head on the cupboard again—loud breaths filling the quiet of the kitchen. Barely giving her a minute, Kylo peeled her off the counter and tossed her over his shoulder—making her squeal as if she were on an amusement ride. He carried her to his bedroom and dropped her onto his bed. He pulled off her shoes, then pulled at the buttons of his vest. Ruby sat up, pulled her dress over her head, unclasped her bra, and tugged at the hook on her right garter. “Keep those on,” he said. He stared at her thighs and licked his lips.

Ruby moved her hand and fell back. She watched Kylo get completely naked. She barely got a good look at him before he was on top of her, planting kisses against her neck. He grabbed her right leg and pressed it back so that her knee was over her chest. Shortly after, she felt something warm and stiff rubbing against the outside of her core—it pressed into her, and the pressure sent a wave throughout her entire body. “Fuck…” they whimpered at the same time. Then, they chuckled. Kylo kissed her lips and inhaled her moans as he pushed more inches into her. He caught her grabbing the blanket in his peripheral, and slowly penetrated her until he couldn’t go any further. “You okay?” he asked. “Yes,” she strained to answer. 

He grabbed her left hand and placed it over the meatiest part of his waist. Then, he dragged out of her, and drove back in. He held on to her right thigh, the leg still pushed back, and dipped in and out of her—fast enough to please, but slow enough for the both of them to feel their lover’s every twitch and pulse, and grip and stroke.

[quarterette]

Utawarerumono: The False Faces ep 13-25 Liveblog

Gonna just straight up do individual episode comments, since the second half is gonna be denser in content. As with the first half, this is a rewatch and will have spoilers for the games.

Opening Comments: Man there’s not much movement in the animation but its beautiful all the same.

Ep 13:

- *spit take* why are they sending Rulu? IDK if it was because the directors weren’t informed about the whole “baby of the family” detail because I can’t imagine Shis letting this happen

- Interesting how instead being of a secret force that Oshtoru sent, Haku and gang are now the accompanying force to Rulu and Atuy.

- I’ll be pleasantly surprised if Entua makes more sense in the anime than in the games

- oh wow Dekopompo is even worse in the anime, straight-up running off on his own.

Ep 14:

- I like how instead of Atuy catching the arrow the twins have a force field. Granted, it make Atuy even more of a non-entity

- the extreme long shots of the CGI soldiers are really nice. I don’t feel like we see the loss of formations as they come into contact with each other often in war anime

- why are the twins running like that - imo that way too much movement for dainty girls (maybe I’ve watched too much anime)

- wow they totally recontextualized retrieving Shinonon and cut down a lot of potential runtime.

- did they seriously remove Atuy’s bloodlust

- you know open-eyed Ougi is growing on me, him and Nosuri have such lovely eye color

- poor Maroro

Ep 15:

- I’m relieved that the adaptation art makes Raiko look less like Lelouch. Always seemed like lazy design to me, him and Mikazuchi look nothing alike.

- did they introduce the telepaths in MoD? I can’t remember.

- that triple-take of Zeguni dying was just silly. If it were one slice x3 it would have been fine but this... Oshtoru be flexing with that mountain.

- I never really felt calling Witsu an Eva was quite right but with the Akuruturuka.... yeah I see it.

- truly we are in the war arc proper now.

- Heh wouldn’t it have been interesting to have the proxies’ subservience kick in instead of having the twins shield Haku. Oh well missed opportunities. IMO it would have worked well with the accelerated timeline the anime needed to achieve.

- what is with the triple takes this episode

- ah haku wasn’t even able to save them gg

- post episode revisiting the VN comments:

they hint at the telepaths, and as I thought the Vurai razing the city wasn’t in the VN. It was a good showpiece and works with Vurai’s characterization, but messes with Haku’s as a cost - the VN suggests that Haku inherently can be ruthless (he suggests scapegoating Moznu for Anju’s kidnapping, which the anime totally skips over), while it looks like the anime is gonna use this mass destruction as the reason for steeling his heart. I can’t say I hate that the writers chose to have the main characters in the fray, but it definitely requires more suspension of disbelief that everyone got out okay compared to the VN.

- Interestingly we don’t see Oshtoru’s mech form at all. I do like the increased bro scenes between Mikazuchi and Oshtoru

Ep 16:

- Yeah we immediately feel the ripples of that last episode changing Haku’s trajectory... its a logical trajectory but... ugh. I’m not sure how I feel about such a contrary Haku. It wasn’t really a thing in the VN? So frustrating augh. Utawarerumono was never a story big on moralizing about war... and the anime writers aren’t doing a great job adding it in.

- I’m 99% sure they pulled some of Ukon’s lines for comforting Haku here from a conversation they had in the VN waaaayyy back around the gigiri fight, making the scene all the more frustrating. The concepts of powerlessness and loss of life is something that Haku had been introduced to the moment he woke up and had already been working on dealing with. I can’t say its an invalid take that he’d be shook over mass destruction (I mean, most people would) but it’s a sharp deviation from the VN.

- Oh wow they’re totally gonna retool the banquet to deal with haku’s trauma instead of him dealing with his memories of being the LAST OF HIS KIND aren’t they.

- yeah they did

- oh god don’t say the word seduce haku, rulu’s gonna die from blood loss

- lol i don’t remember the twins being tied up

- rulu is dead

- and now haku is dead too. I think only Ougi and Yakutowaruto escaped unscathed.

- this did give me the bro bonding that I had been missing in the show thus far. Not enough drinking scenes! like literally the VN is literally just baths and booze between the action lol

Ep 17:

- ah finally the flashback episode. lol all the crunchyroll comments are like “watch the first season”.

- haku calling his new buddies family... oof mito’s knowing gaze makes it all the much sadder

- Haku:”did you need to go that far” Mito: “lemme do it again with Tuskuru”

- hah “reposition your camera” nice, easy way to not show his face

- heh stares at your sister-in-law’s butt, that’s actually a pretty subtle hint without adapting any of the monologue from the VN that he kinda had feelings for her

- damn this is probably the most complete vision of the future we get in any medium

- hey to be fair the ameterasu blast was mutsumi and not exactly a product of mankind fighting each other - but it does go to show just how little Mito knew about what was actually going down

- to continue with my frustration, we see that haku is called out by his bro that he has a habit of “conceal don’t feel” so it makes his emo bit last episode even more jarring - though in hindsight I guess his depression comes less out of the blue for his friends now - its just that the reason is misattributed

- oof “make up for lost time”

- ooh I like the final scene with Woshis as the delegate to Tuskuru. The VN did fine without it but man what a cliffie for those watching the first time.

Ep 18:

- oof we’re not going to have any shinonon/kiwru antics are we

- man I can’t wait to see Benawi - he was my favorite chara in Uta1 after Touka

- wow they really did just ignore the fact that Kiwru is the prince of Ennakamuy and cut him out of the party

- dugh never mind I don’t like ougi’s open eyes here

- speaking of ougi they totally glossed over his role as reconnaissance

- and have they even mentioned that nosuri is trying to retake their clan’s name?

- cocopo still best bird

Ep 19:

- of course you’ll be sweaty haku, boro boro only wears that brown undershirt in tuskur smh

- i love how all of the dads we see dote on their daughters so much

- of course only now do they mention the fact that atuy and haku are drinking buddies and we just have to take it at face value

- actually seeing those sailor uniforms in action make atuy’s regret that much funnier, the stills don’t quite do it justice (though really, it’s the sound effects carrying the team)

- lol the background soyankekur antics are great

- cocopooooo noooo damn this romance with mukkur is great

Ep 20:

- huhu woshis was allowed down to the underground garden huh

- benawiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

- dang they didn’t use the hot air balloon ;-; so disappointing like if they do it this way they won’t even get to retake the supplies ;-;

- i guess its a good way to hint at kuon’s identity

- something is wrong with kurou’s face

- also where the fuck is nosuri - i know kiwru is a lost cause for this show but nosuri too? they really are trying to wipe out the tactics seen in the VN

- i do think the line about kurou’s line to kuon about “ripping the country in half” is nice - can’t remember if it was in the VN but at this point most of the good lines seem to be coming out of the VN

- ugh the twins are such a cop out, still think they should have went with the hot air balloon strategy

- we hardly knew ye mito

Ep 21:

- dang I’m pleasantly surprised by these CG soldiers

- bye bye munechika, still salty you can’t turn into a mech

- oof “I’m sure my mom was someone like you” this show lives and breathes on dramatic irony

- bye bye anju, what was the point of actually having oshtoru there when the tea was delivered? makes him seem more incompetent than he is, though entua was nowhere to be seen - imo for the best

- oshtoru, an honorable man through and through, giving up your mask, lowkey too honorable for your own good

- okay one of my favorite things is how regularly dekopompo is ignored during the generals’ council meetings; overlapping voices isn’t really a thing in the VNs due to its nature as a written medium first and foremost

- oh interesting Oshtoru’s men are coming to defend him that’s new

- oh no torture time ;-;

- post episode VN notes: ugh they also dropped the Woshis power grab of locking Dekopompo and Raiko outside of the gates

Ep 22:

- Yes go be a dad Yakuto and stop Nekone from doing stupid shit please oh please oh please

- Man they are seriously retooling oshtoru’s downfall aren’t they - wish it didn’t come off so crudely planned. Like, y’all know Oshtoru is loved by the people, did the generals not think some sort of rioting would happen if you let that info go public? Granted the original plot of having Entua sneak the info out is pretty contrived... but at least it better preserves the perceived competency of the generals by forcing a smaller timeframe in which everything goes down.

- man people watching this will be so confused next season when they realize Kiwru is a prince

- wut Kuon you should know you probably won’t be able to get info to the princesses once y’all leave. Good that Shinonon is going on ahead to Ennakamuy though.

- eh are they’re gonna try leaving by sea this time? even though Ennakamuy is in the mountains?

- secret tunnel ~ ♫

- aw no Evenkuruga reveal for Nosuri and Ougi. Though, I guess the anime never established that their base was in the Hakuorokaku basement...

- you know, since they just generalized the jamming barrier it’s kinda nice to see that the gang had to sneak in the hard way. IMO that’s one of the “game design justifies the plot” moments - the VN tries to keep everyone together so you can have all your unit options when fighting, but let’s be honest smaller strike teams work at times.

- oh hi Honoka, you’re not arrested here? guess not.

- oh god have they been translating Atuy’s “onii-san”s as “mister” this whole time? I can’t say that “love” was a better translation but that’s just tragic

- I wish we got more hints that haku actually has been doing some training (aka the SRPG parts of the game) rather than these random moments of competency and knocking out the guards.

- good god oshtoru your honorableness is gonna be the death of you. how can you trust Vurai. Seriously idk how it’s gonna turn out here, but Vurai literally wants to see Anju dead in the VN.

- ok i lie splitting the party was a terrible idea. they are taking way too long to convince oshtoru to take a stand. these men are way too stubborn. jk its fine

- whelp there goes the boat

- aw yeh Yakutowaruto lets go

Ep 23:

- Yakutowaruto continues to be a badass

- ugh and of course Oshtoru gets hurt, and he’s not gonna tell anyone

- ok I’m enjoying how acrobatic these twins are

- the plot change ripples continue to be seen; there’s no distractions at the gates since dekopompo is inside the gates. Raiko’s strategy stuff does make for good tension tho.

- ugh the fact that Soyankekuru is in the capital is gonna complicate things. The moment Atuy is seen to defect he’s screwed. That’s gonna change the timeframe of things second half.

- lol Kuon god powers time, hope there weren’t too many casualties. Poor Nosuri now has two sacks of people to deal with...

- ok I feel like I’m seeing more poor art quality this episode

- wow it seems that everyone’s on board for some arson today

- bruh don’t take him through the sewers Oshtoru’s wound’s gonna get infected

- oh god who thought it was a good idea to give Rulu a blade.

- Cocopo best bird. Period. MVP.

- Soyankekuru, what a guy.

Ep 24:

- ooh mech fight in the city? oh nvm its just a sword fight. a sword fight between two beasts. thank god vurai ain’t that dumb

- wait they said there was a barrier in the palace, but i don’t think there was a barrier for the outer walls? why the frick didn’t the twins just teleport out for the last bit? they were pretty close to the gates... unless they needed the gates open anyways?

- vurai? not dumb? scratch that, good god do y’all not care about the safety of the people? guess not cuz it’s MECH FIGHT TIME (ok, if we’re honest oshtoru’s the one who initiated so yes he’s equally dumb)

- water vs fire, groudon vs kyogre, this is what animation is all about YASSS

- the twins’ shield is too OP

- haku please stop indulging Nekone

- will the twins actually be able to seal Vurai? they were kind of trash at doing their job in the VN (though they did have the good excuse of being exhausted for this particular instance)

- ok that nekone running sequence is jank

- damn haku blocked that punch? oh no he’s on fire

- looking like nekone’s “it was my fault” is gonna be part of a cascade of setbacks rather than the final blow. I’m kinda glad - the VN’s take was probably the most exasperating part of the whole story - gutwrenching but also made me want to punch her. I’m up for arguing whether or not taking that away was a good thing

- oh no the salt. no. how could you put it at the post-credits scene.

- vurai’s confirmed dead? that could be a problem next season.

Ep 25:

- dang what an opener giving us no info just kuon looking sad. we had emo haku now get ready for emo kuon i guess

- nuedori is probably my favorite song after kimi ga tame, such a good song to overlay the time skip over

- man anime viewers must be so confused. like they saw Haku and Oshtoru get out of town but only Oshtoru show up. man this is so effed up.

- no not the fan noooo augh  brokoro in the kokoro

- sad nekone really sells it doesn’t it

- dang I knew Ennakamuy was surrounded by mountains but I guess the anime went and interpreted that as a CRATER

- at least kuon didn’t leave until later in the night?

-i know the twins did a spell in the VN as well but seeing the visual change between haku and oshtoru is a bit silly

- what’s with the flower field that’s so cheesy

- i can see why someone said laughed rather than cried during this particular use of kimi ga tame - the alternating shots to his saltification is just silly, there’s so many prettier shots for showing people dissolving - like the VN gave you a very serviceable “standing on a cliff as the sun rises and you fade into dust” why didn’t you take it

- side note in the VN i was imagining it something like this scene from CCS but different lighting (sorry I could only find the english dub on short notice, timestamp at 1:13:24):

- also how could you get everyone off model during such an important part

- you know what I’m just gonna pretend that there was some really bad production crunch so they had to do a rush job smh

- i do like this orchestration tho

- oh god the cheese never ends, now it’s raining

- that said it’s not terrible, but definitely missing something compared to the VN

- haha with some of your decisions next season you might just end up in Denebokshir Haku. jk we all know how it ends

- boro boro ;-; yes go hug your kid she needs all the comfort she can get

[crashdevlin]

Deserving

Author’s Note: Written for @georgialouisea‘s 2K Quote Challenge. I picked the FRIENDS quote ‘We were on a break!’. This was meant to be a light, funny fic and it just... I’m so sorry for the amount of angst in this fic... except, you know... it’s what I’m good at. No gifs are mine. Oh, and as angels are genderless, I use the pronouns appropriate to their vessel. SPOILERS FOR SEASON 14!

Pairing(s): Dean x Plus-sized Reader

Summary: y/n and Dean have been together for years, but they’ve been arguing nonstop since a couple weeks after Dean came back. 

Word Count: 4512

Story Warnings: so much angst it’s not even okay, kinda cheating, breakups, scars, self-esteem issues, Michael!Dean, character death (events of 14x08), the events of 14x09...

You stomped after Dean, fury on your face as the two of you entered the library of the Bunker. Castiel looked up, instantly uncomfortable with his friends’ human drama. The two of you had been fighting for three days straight, Cas wasn't sure about what, and he was certain that you’d broken off your relationship the night before, but here you were, fighting again.

“Cas, you’ve got a perfect memory,” Dean said, coming to a stop in front of the angel, whose eyes went wide. “What was the last thing y/n said before she threw her hands up like a toddler and stomped out of here last night?”

Castiel looked between the hunters. “Uh…”

“I’m a toddler?! At least I didn’t run to my best friend for help justifying-”

“That’s ‘cause you’re a bitch and you don’t have any friends.”

“I have friends!”

“Name one… and Sam and the hunters you talk to online don’t count.”

“Why not? They’re real people who like me so-”

“Cas! Come on,” Dean called out as the angel started to slink away.

Cas sighed and turned back to them. “I believe her words were… ‘Fuck you, Dean. If you want a break, we’re on one’.”

“Ha! See?” Dean turned to you. “We were on a break!”

“Dean, I don’t think-” Cas started as your mouth turned down in anger and disgust.

“You know what? Fine, Ross, we were on a break, so what you did wasn’t cheating.” Dean’s look of victory was cut short as you continued. “It was just a terrible, shitty thing to do to me.”

“Oh, come-”

“You couldn’t wait six fuckin’ hours for me to calm down, cool off and come home? No, you had to go pick up some bar skank and take her home to-”

“I was drunk!” Dean defended, throwing his hands up.

“So was I! But I managed to make it home without scratch marks down my back! Why didn’t you?!”

“Oh, the only reason you didn’t get fucked was because men don’t generally go to bars to pick up scarred-up fat chicks,” Dean spat out, nastily.

And just like that the fight was over, all anger being washed out of you by a wave of pain as Dean stabbed both of your weak points with one sentence. You blinked at Dean, your breath frozen in your lungs. You could see the moment he realized he’d gone too far, but you just looked away. “Oh. Okay. I…” You nodded, before rushing past Cas and running up the spiral staircase.

“y/n-” Dean called, but he was met with the sound of the Bunker door creaking closed. He wished you would have yelled at him, screamed, shouted, hit him, hurt him… fuck, he wouldn’t have been too upset if you shot him after that comment, that would’ve meant you were pissed. But you weren’t pissed. You were hurt and it was on him.

“Dean. Go after her,” Cas demanded.

Dean took a deep breath and shook his head. “No, man. Not after that. Gotta give her time to-” He rubbed his fingers over his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “-get pissed off about it.”

“And if she doesn’t ‘get pissed off’?” Cas asked, his words stilted. “If she stays depressed and in pain? What then, Dean?”

Dean looked down. “Then, at least the fight’s over.”

“As well as your relationship.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure that was over the moment I stuck my dick in that hourglass blond from the roadhouse on Route 32.”

“Why?” Castiel shook his head. “Why would you have sex with someone other than y/n?”

Dean licked his lips and walked over to the whiskey in the crystal bottle. “Because, Cas… it’s…” He picked up the bottle and filled a crystal tumbler. “I just… when I imagined my life… when I imagined comin’ up on forty and settling down with just one woman… it wasn’t her.”

Cas’ eyebrows tucked together in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“She’s just… I figured if I… if I got serious with a chick, it’d be with a normal one. One like Cassie, like Lisa. Y/n is… she’s hard and she’s broken and she’s the meanest bitch I’ve ever laid eyes on and that’s… I don’t think that’s what I want, Cas.”

“You did this… on purpose?”

Dean took a drink and shook his head. “No. No, I… I started the fight on purpose, but… I… didn’t mean to…”

“Yes, you did.” Castiel tilted his head in confusion, searching Dean's thoughts. “You went out and found a woman who embodies every trait y/n confided that she wishes she had, and you had sex with that woman just to hurt y/n. Dean… why didn't you just…”

“Break up with my brother's best friend for no reason? I still… I don't know. I mean, I wanted it over but I also didn't want to end it.”

“Yeah, I mean, I can, but- Are you sure, y/n?” Sam walked in, anger-tinged worry on his face as he held his cell phone to his ear. “No, I just- maybe after you calm down and think about-” He sighed and nodded. “Yeah, okay. I'll box it up. Text me the address. Yeah, you, too. Be careful.”

Sam stared at Dean for a moment after he clicked the phone off, anger radiating from him. “Her scars, Dean? The one thing she's more self-conscious about than her weight, which you also slammed her on! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Why don't you ask Cas? He seems to be an expert in why I do the things I do,” Dean responded, walking away toward his bedroom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean set his drink on top of the dresser and sighed as he picked up a picture that had never found its way into a picture frame. A Polaroid of him and y/n at the South Dakota State Fair a year before. He ran his thumb over the scar on her cheek. He’d loved her scars when he first fell for her. They were badges of strength, proof that she could survive, that she could hack it in the Life. Now, they were a harsh reminder of bad times.

Sam pushed his door opened and walked in with an empty file box under his arm. “Get out,” he demanded.

“Excuse you? This is my room.” Dean set the picture down and picked up his drink.

“Yeah, well, I’m packin’ up y/n’s stuff for her, so get out or stay out out of my way.” Sam started to round the room as Dean sat on his bed with his back against the headboard, legs stretched out as he watched his brother. Sam picked up knives and hair ties, pens and notebooks and her hunter journal from the small desk. He slammed the box down on the desk and turned to Dean. “You know there are better ways you could’ve done this, Dean.”

Dean looked up at him, tiredly. “Oh, really?”

“Yes! A hundred better ways that wouldn’t leave her destroyed like this.”

“First, she’ll be fine. She’s strong as fuck.” Dean leaned forward, kicking his feet over the side of his bed, which still smelled like y/n. “Second, it had to be this way. Because this way, she’s gone and she’s not coming back. It’s over this way.” Sam shook his head in disbelief. “If she’d stuck around to be your bestie or Cas and Jack’s hunting partner… I know me, Sam, I’da ended up in bed with her again and then I’d have to deal with the morning after. It’s better if she’s just gone.”

“When the hell did you decide you didn’t want her, anymore? Because last I checked, you were over the moon for her.”

Dean looked at the glass of whiskey. “I don’t know, Sam, it’s just… ever since I’ve been back-”

“If you blame this on Michael, I swear I’m gonna punch you. This isn’t-”

“Do you know what he did to her?” Dean snapped. Sam looked away, his vision resting on the hunter journal in the box. He knew well the lines of her newest scars, the ones that covered the landscape of her body; the scars that were worse than the werewolf claws across her right cheek that had made her feel ugly for five years or the one across her left shin that kept her from wearing shorts. Sam knew her new scars, all created by a karambit held by Michael in Dean’s hands. Michael had left her barely alive, sent her back to the Bunker, a clear message not to try to find him, or stop him. “That she survived that… that she could still look me in my face after that… but she still loved me after that.”

“You didn’t do it, Dean. Michael did.”

“And it was my fault! My body, my face, my dumbass plan to save you and Jack. How could she not hold any grudge? How could she love me? I mean, that kind love… I don’t deserve that, Sam.”

Sam’s eyes snapped to his brother’s. “Are you telling me that you just crushed y/n’s heart because you think you don’t deserve the unconditional love she’s freely offered from the moment she met you?” Dean rolled his eyes and took a drink. “You’re an idiot. You are the dumbest man in the history of dumb men. You just fucked away the greatest thing God ever gave you because you thought you didn’t deserve her?”

Sam sighed loudly and turned back around to continue packing. “And, of course, you didn’t just fuck yourself out of y/n, you fucked me, too. You fucked over Jack. ‘cause losing one mom wasn’t bad enough, right?”

Dean set his drink down on the dresser and stood, pulling Baby’s keys out of his pocket and leaving his room without another word.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m sorry, buddy. I know I should have said ‘goodbye’.” You’d willed yourself to stop crying long enough to answer one of Jack’s phone calls. “It all just… it happened so fast, Jack.”

“But, are you coming back?”

You shook your head, your throat clenching as you tried to avoid another wave of tears. “No, I’m not. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, but-”

“But I wanted to show you what I learned on YouTube. I-”

“I’m sorry. Jack, I’m sorry.”

“I just don’t understand why you had to leave. Don’t you like it here?”

“O-of course, I do, but… things are complicated.” How do you explain a catastrophic breakup to a toddler? “I can’t be there, buddy. I wish I could, but… you’re better off with the guys anyway. They can help you better than me. Look, uh, can you… can you tell Dean that I… sent him a package? It’ll be at the post office in… uh, I think three days.”

“Okay.”

“I, uh, I gotta go.”

“Okay.”

“You know you can call me if you ever need anything, right?”

“Yeah. Goodbye, y/n.”

You stared at the ceiling of the motel room you’d grabbed after running from the bunker. How quickly your entire life had changed. A week ago, you were expecting to spend the rest of your life in Lebanon. Three months ago, you were half-dead in a hospital bed, having been almost destroyed by the archangel wearing the man you loved. You had nightmares of glowing blue eyes, of a curved blade tearing through your skin and the muscle under it, of him healing you just enough to keep you from dying of blood loss or shock.

You held on in hopes that Dean would come back some day, and he had. Dean came back and now? Now you were wishing Michael had just let you die in that hotel you tracked him down in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean stared at the box sitting on the bench of the Impala for at least fifteen minutes, trying to decide whether he should open it. He knew what it was. Things he’d left in y/n’s car, things he’d given her that she didn’t want anymore, maybe a nasty note. He sighed and pulled out his pocket knife, running the blade across the tape and opening the flaps. He bit his bottom lip as he pulled out a Led Zeppelin cassette, followed by an AC/DC band tee, a switchblade he was sure he’d lost years ago, his favorite pair of vice-grip pliers, and the simple heart necklace he’d given her for her birthday the year before.

Under all of that was the other necklace she always wore, the white gold chain with the thick sterling silver band that used to reside on Dean’s right hand. It was never anything special until she picked it up from his bedside table and claimed it as her own. It was nothing more than a bottle opener to him until she slipped it on that chain, until he saw her kissing it before she slipped it into her t-shirt every day.

There was no note. There was nothing she needed to say, and that was good. That meant she was done. Dean slipped the ring off of the chain and slid it onto his right ring finger, tossing everything into the box before pulling away from the Lebanon Post Office.

~~~~~~~~~~

“What do you mean ‘Jack’s dying’?” you asked, panic settling in your chest.

“When Lucifer took his grace-” Sam started.

“How long?” you demanded.

“Rowena thinks not long. Couple hours, maybe.”

“No. How long has he been sick? Why didn’t he tell me? Why didn’t you?”

“He was hiding it. He had a cough, but… we didn’t know.” Sam was silent for a minute. “Can you get here?”

“I’m in Orlando, Sam.” Your voice broke as you continued. “I’m nah-ot gonna get there in time.”

“Can you try?”

“Of course, I’ll try.”

You were absolutely exhausted by the time you made it to the Bunker. You hadn’t slept in three days and you were emotionally unprepared for Jack to be dead. He was a baby! How could he be dead? Sam greeted you in the garage, Jack right behind him. The nephil didn’t even look slightly off. “We saved him,” Sam said, noticing your look of confusion.

Jack rushed forward, wrapping his arms around you and you crumbled. Tears streamed down your face as you wrapped your arms around him and buried your face in the boy’s chest. “It’s okay, y/n. I’m okay.”

“Hey, what’s-” Dean’s voice was just audible over your sobs and it made you stiffen in Jack’s arms. “Oh. You called her?”

“Yeah, Dean. She deserved to be here,” Sam answered.

“Yeah, okay, well, he’s not dead anymore, so…”

“So, what, Dean?” Jack asked, pulling back to look at Dean. You didn’t. You looked at your feet. “She can’t leave. She just got here.”

“And she drove from Orlando in one go, Dean. She needs to rest,” Sam defended.

“It’s fine. I’ll just… the motel down the-”

“No!” Sam and Jack both shouted.

You shook your head. “Like I said, it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. I don’t think you should even be driving, right now. You look like a stiff breeze would knock you over,” Sam said, putting a large hand on your shoulder. “Come on, we’ll get you set up in one of the extra rooms. You can at least get some sleep before Dean chases you away again.”

Dean growled and stomped out of the garage. “Why is Dean angry?” Jack asked.

“He kinda hates me, Jack. Don’t worry. I’m not gonna let anything taint the fact that my nephil buddy is alive and thriving.”

“How could he hate you?” Jack asked, curiously.

“He-” Sam started but shook his head. “Let’s just get you in bed, huh?”

“What happened to all the, uh, Apocalypse World folks?” you asked, tiredly, leaning into Sam’s embrace.

“Oh, they’re all out hunting. Out in the world, making things better. We got them in the habit of the check-ins and wearing the GoPros so… they don’t need to be here,” Sam answered.

“GoPros was a good idea, Sam,” you muttered as he led you into a nondescript room.

“What do you want for breakfast when you wake up, huh?” Sam asked as you dropped to the bed.

“We’ve got Krunch Cookie Crunch,” Jack offered with a smile.

“That stuff’ll rot your teeth,” Sam said, pulling your tennis shoes off and yanking the blanket back to let you under the thin brown fabric.

“Scrambled eggs. No teeth rot there,” you answered.

“Unless you cover them in ketchup,” Sam said, knowingly.

“Don’t reveal my secrets, Sam.”

He scoffed and stood as you snuggled into the pillow, heavy eyes falling closed and sleep dragging you down quickly.

~~~~~~~

“I told you that she needs to not be here, Sam.”

“Just because you can’t trust yourself to keep it in your fuckin’ pants when it comes to y/n, that doesn’t mean you have to put her in danger by sending her away when she’s half-dead.”

“You’re the one who didn’t call her and tell her that Lily Sunder was bringing Jack back from the dead. She wouldn’t have done that 24-hour drive all at once if you’d told her Jack was fine.”

“I’m sorry, Dean, I got distracted by Jack dying and coming back.”

“Oh, bullshit! You wanted her here.”

“So? We miss her, Dean,” Sam argued, before he sighed. “And we’re about to go against Michael. Don’t you think she deserves to have the option to participate?” Dean opened his mouth to argue that y/n shouldn’t be anywhere near Michael, but Sam continued. “He tortured her, Dean, which is worse than using your body and drowning you. She deserves to-”

“No the fuck she doesn’t! She doesn’t need to be anywhere near Michael, Sam. You can’t put her in that building with him.”

“Oh, but it’s fine for the rest of us? It’s fine for Garth? Dean, if she wants to go, none of us can stop her.”

Dean shook his head. “I hate this,” he said, stomping off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, what do you think?” Castiel asked, licking his chapped lips as you pushed eggs around your plate with your fork.

You didn’t know what to think. Part of you really wanted to be there when Michael got what was coming to him. Part of you wanted to see an archangel’s eyes blow out with light, but the bigger part of you wanted to never be around Michael again. “I-I don’t know, Cas. Um… If you need me, I’m willing, but…” You swallowed to clear your suddenly dry throat, reaching out to pick up your coffee mug. “I just…”

“I understand.” Cas nodded. “Will you come to Kansas City? You don’t have to go against Michael, but I think it would be best for you to… to be there.”

You nodded. “Yeah, of course. I wouldn’t leave you guys hanging.”

Cas gave a tight smile. “Thank you. Jack is a lot happier when you’re here.”

“Dean’s not,” you responded, standing to toss the rest of your scrambled eggs in the trash.

The angel sighed, heavily. “Dean is complicated.”

“You don’t have to tell me, Cas.” You walked to the sink, grabbing a sponge and cleaning the plate. “You know I can’t stay, right? I’m so happy that Jack’s okay and I… I, obviously, can be around Dean now without breaking down, but… I can’t stay around him not for very long, anyway. It’s too much.”

“You’re still in love?”

You bit your lip, grabbing a dishrag and wiping the plate. “Of course. He could never hurt me enough to make me stop.”

“Y/n…”

“It’s not a big deal.” You set the plate on the counter and turned to him. “I always knew I wasn't good enough for him, that someday… someday he'd realize that… someday he'd remember that he's Dean Winchester and that he could have almost any woman in the world.” A little shuddering sigh escaped you as you avoided looking at Cas. “Just wish he would've cast me out before Michael got his hands on me. I'd have far fewer scars to show if he had.”

You ran your hands across your shoulder and down. You'd counted them, once. Well, not just once. You'd actually counted them several times, sitting in front of a floor-length mirror with a compact in your hand, making sure that the number came out the same every time. Three-hundred and thirty-three cuts. Ignoring the old scars, just counting the ones Michael tore into your flesh over the two days he had you, there were three hundred and thirty-three of them; A divine number.

Cas had tried, on more than one occasion when you first got out of the hospital, to heal the scars. Michael had done something to you that prevented Cas’ grace from touching you, a ‘force field’ as Jack had dubbed it. You were stuck with the scars.

You cleared your throat and turned away. “Anyway, I’ll head to Kansas City, get a bit of an advance recon going. You can call me when you… when you get there.”

“You shouldn’t go alone.”

“I really should.” You stepped forward, wrapped your arms around him, before running for your car.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The copper taste of blood in your mouth pulled you out of the unconscious state you were in. “No,” was all you could say to the vamp that got the drop on you.

“Just let it happen, y/n,” a sharp-dressed, dark-skinned woman in clunky heels knelt down next to you. “You’ll be mine in a minute either way. It’ll go so much faster if you just let go.”

“Michael,” you groaned, trying to fight it as you could feel yourself turning.

“Do you remember what I said when I let you go, y/n?” Michael asked, her eyes glowing blue as she ran her hand over your mouth to clean the blood off of you. “I told you that I have no need of broken, human hunters. What I have need of is this… you, hungry.”

“I won’t,” you started to deny, shaking your head as everything started to get louder. Hyper-senses.

“You will. Pick her up. Take her to Hitomi Plaza… and get her someone to eat.”

You tried to resist. When they locked you in that office at Hitomi Plaza, you tried to find a way out. When they shoved that trembling businessman through the door and quickly closed it behind him, you tried to ignore the sound of his heart pounding, how the smell of him made your mouth water. You tried to keep away from him, but you were so hungry.

Michael appeared next to you as you dropped the man to the floor, disgust eating at you because of how satisfied you felt. She smiled. “Now, do you see? Every desire you’ve ever had, they pale in comparison to this one, and this desire is so easily sated.” You blinked as she cupped your chin in her hands. “You’re mine, now.”

You nodded, looking up into her eyes. Now that the hunger was gone, you could feel Michael’s grace flowing through you. You were Michael’s. “Good girl. Now, how about a treat?” You could feel grace pouring into your skin from her palms and when she pulled away smiling, you ran your hand over your right cheek. No raised tissue met your fingertips, the scars on your face gone. “Much more pleasing to the eye without those scars.”

“Thank you,” you whispered. “But wh-”

“Why?” Michael smirked. “Because I found you deserving. You proved your strength… here.” She pointed to one of the scars on your stomach. “I gave you three hundred and thirty-three cuts. You gave me tears and blood in return, vomit at one point, but you did not, not once, beg me to stop or to end your life. You are strong. But I don’t want a strong human, y/n.”

“You needed a monster.”

“Wanted,” Michael corrected, before continuing. “I knew you’d be here, in Kansas City. I knew one of my army would find you. I incentivized them to turn you instead of killing you like we’ll be doing with the other hunters. And now, when the boys arrive, you’ll be here to greet them with me.”

You nodded. Suddenly, all you wanted was to show the Winchesters the new you. You felt your fangs poke out of your gums again in your excitement. “Put your fangs away, dear. Don’t want to ruin the surprise, do we?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You watched from the CCTV in the security room as Michael beat Castiel bloody, while Sam, Jack and Dean infiltrated the office in an attempt to catch Michael by surprise. Of course the archangel knew they were there and called to you with her grace, bidding you to join them. You walked into the penthouse office as Michael’s female vessel dropped to the ground. You could feel Michael reenter Dean and it made you smile. It was right. He was stronger in Dean, better.

Michael stepped forward a few steps to look out at the lights of the city.

“Dean?” Cas said, confused.

You couldn’t see their faces from behind them, but you could see their bodies go tense as Michael broke the spear in half. You smiled as Michael turned, eyes glowing brightly. “No,” Sam denied. Their hearts were pounding and you felt yourself getting hungry again just from the sound of it.

“Yeah.” Michael’s eyes faded to a dark green. “When I gave up Dean, you didn’t think to question it, to ask why? Dean was… resisting me. He was too attached to you, to all of you.” He beckoned you closer and you came around Jack’s right side as he continued speaking. “He wouldn’t stop squirming… to get out, get back. So I left...” You swiped the crystal tumbler off of the coffee table and handed it to him.

“...but not without leaving the door open…” He licked his lips. “...just a crack.”

“Y/n?” Jack questioned, eyes wide and confused.

“Oh, don’t worry about y/n. She was just the first in a long line of things I ruined for Dean.”

“Why wait?” Castiel asked.

“The same reason I scarred y/n; to break him. To crush and disappoint him so completely that, this time, he’ll be nice and quiet for a change-” He reached out and ran his hand across your cheek. “-buried. And he is. He’s gone.”

You licked your lips as he drank down the rest of the liquor in the glass. “And now, I have a whole army out there…” He spread his arms dramatically to show the scale of his city-wide attack plan before turning to you and winking. “...and here, waiting, ready for my command, ready… for this.”

Michael didn’t have to tell you what to do as he snapped his fingers and your fangs descended, ready to attack at the behest of your master, your savior, the only one who ever saw you as deserving of anything.

KITCHEN SINK TAGS @heyitscam99 @wonderlandfandomkingdom @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mrs-meghan-winchester @henrymorganme @lonely-skys

SUPERNATURAL TAGS @letsby @mrswhozeewhatsis @adoptdontshoppets @spnskinnyballs @deansenwackles

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: The Shining Beacon Part 2

I miss RWBY. Specifically, I miss early RWBY when there was less drama (not really but let me pretend), so let’s head on back to Volume 1.

In our opening scene of Episode 3, Ruby and Jaune have managed to find the hall where the rest of the newbies are meeting and honestly? I’m super proud of them for it. These are the two fools who will later argue over who had the map while wandering around the wilds of Remnant. Baby leaders managing to find the rest of their flock? Great job. Well done. Mama’s proud.

This little time skip raises some questions though. Did they ever find the Beacon cafeteria? What else did they chat about the rest of the day? Yang makes it sound like they’ve been gone a number of hours and I for one would love to know what awkward Ruby and even-more-awkward Jaune got up to during that time.

Tis the realm of fics though, not canon. Instead we get another shot of RWBY’s infamous shadow people with Yang standing out like the goddamn sun.

Who could the main character possibly be??

Beats me. What a gosh darn difficult question.

Yang: Ruby! I saved you a spot.

Are... are there spots, Yang? You’re all standing in a giant auditorium. If Ruby comes to stand beside you is another student gonna throw a fit about it? I mean real talk, I went to watch the changing of the guard while spending a month in London and let me tell you, there were people who guarded their spots like a pissed off bird guarding her eggs. (For the record you couldn’t even see anything. This was just human prickliness at its finest). So who knows, maybe Yang knows precisely what she’s doing.

Ruby abandons Jaune to join her, which on the one hand is kinda mean—you can’t invite your new friend to stand around with you?—but Ruby does say she’ll “see [him] after the ceremony,” so that’s nice and all. I know my anxious ass would have been thrilled to hear someone making future plans like that, even if it’s mostly just a nicety. Making new friends is hard.

Of course, Jaune doesn’t make that job any easier on himself. I’ve written before about his Nice Guy tendencies in the early volumes and they come back in full force here. He bemoans Ruby’s leave, asking himself where he’ll find “another nice, quirky girl to talk to?” It’s an easy introduction for Pyrrha, revealing her behind Jaune and quite obviously setting her up as that “nice, quirky” girl who he’ll become closest to as the episodes progress, but jeez, Manic Pixy Girl assumptions abound. Especially given the fact that Jaune/Pyrrha became canon in Volume 3. Obviously Pyrrha will be written with great depth as RWBY continues, but it does rankle a bit to have her introduced as a Ruby stand-in, someone positioned as a way of fulfilling Jaune’s ridiculous “needs.” I’m glad this is undermined later when she takes initiative towards him, i.e. saving him during initiation and angling to be his partner. Her interest is clear even if at that point Jaune will take anyone pretty: Ruby, Weiss, Pyrrha herself.

But I digress.

Ruby gives her whole spiel about meeting Weiss and Yang’s response is, “Yikes. Meltdown already?” heavily implying that she expected Ruby to have a “meltdown” at this school, just not so soon. Which—iffy terminology aside—isn’t at all surprising. RWBY does an excellent job of setting up Ruby’s nerves, from her “bee’s knees” comment to her eagerness in showing Weiss exactly what she’s capable of. The girl is desperate for validation—as is the whole RWBYJNPR gang, in their own ways—and a lot of that comes out as anxious, social awkwardness. If Ruby was at all inclined towards “meltdowns” at Signal then I’d say she did a damn good job holding herself together through everything that happened at Beacon. Granted, being put in a position of power will help with that, at least on a surface level. To semi-quote Oz, how can you expect others to put forth their best if you’re not constantly doing the same? Ruby has the veneer of self-control down now because she had to for her team... which makes me anticipate her inevitable breaking point all the more. We saw in Volume Six how close Ruby got to dropping her ‘I’m an endlessly put together leader’ persona with Qrow drinking himself to oblivion, but she never quite got there. I’m waiting (hoping really) that Ruby’s long-established anxiety will finally be addressed, what with Yang having made good headway in that department and all the shit they’ve gone through adding up to a very justified breakdown.

Let the poor girl really falter for once and let the rest of the group grapple with that. Everyone deserves it.

I’m jumping six volumes ahead though. Here and now Ruby is still telling Yang all about her horrible encounter, segueing into how she “just wanted her to stop yelling” which of course is the perfect moment for Weiss to sneak up behind her with a loud “YOU!” (Jaune’s comment linking to Pyrrha; Ruby’s comment linking to Weiss—RT enjoys writing these little bridges, particularly for introducing new characters).

I love this moment simply for how much it tells us about Weiss. Largely in retrospect. Because while her trailer song is definitely on the nose in some respects—“I’m the loneliest of all”—it’s not until later on that we realize exactly how abusive Weiss’ family is and how isolated she’s been for the whole of her upbringing. This girl has absolutely no experience interacting with people outside of the Schnee/everyone else hierarchy (note in a moment how she assumes that Ruby will want to “make it up to [her]”) so if you’re suddenly surrounded by people for the first time who aren’t fawning over your name and money and dust connections... what do you? How do you get some vaguely positive attention? Oh okay, guess I’ll force it! Here Weiss is claiming that she never wants Ruby to speak to her again, but she’s the one who barged in on their conversation and loudly drawing attention to herself. Weiss is starved for healthy validation while simultaneously stuck in the behavior she’s been taught: asking for attention solely by trying to show off— here’s a rambling summary of the Schnee Dust Company’s disclaimer look at what a good puppet I am—or by insulting others. Weiss mocks Ruby’s genuine offer to buy school supplies together but then doesn’t move away from her and Yang once the announcements start. She doesn’t know how to say ‘yes’ to any offers of friendship, but she also doesn’t want to say ‘no.’

Interestingly, that moment also tells us a fair bit about Ruby. Not just by re-emphasizing how kind she is by extending the offer to start this relationship over, but also adding weight to the headcanon that Ruby is neurodivergent. Weiss’ heavy sarcasm about how they can “go shopping, paint our nails, and talk about cute boys” goes right over Ruby’s head. She responds with a “Wow! Really?” similar to the “...can you?” heard right before she attacks the Nevermore during initiation. Ruby has a history of not just being awkward but missing a lot of ‘normal’ social cues as well.

The girls’ bonding is interrupted when Ozpin begins his speech and boy oh boy do I love this moment too. Anyone who reads my metas knows that I’m a firm defender of our disaster headmaster, especially after volume 6, and looking back this scene is the PERFECT example of how RT tries to make Ozpin seem shady... while really failing to accomplish that. Obscuring eyes/the whole face is a super easy way to tell the viewer that this is an Untrustworthy Character. See: every horror movie where the villain’s face is obscured by shadows, our own dear Adam who keeps his face hidden with a mask, etc. It serves to dehumanize the character, keeping us from seeing some of the most expressive parts of their bodies, and equates one thing they’re hiding—such as a deformity. Yay ableism! /s—with other things they’re keeping from the heroes; secrets, sinister intentions, and the like. The primary exception to this are characters who wear masks for defined and morally acceptable reasons. i.e. superheroes who need to keep their secret identities intact and, notably, aren’t withholding that information from the viewer. We as the audience usually know who they are and thus aren’t inclined to distrust the character based on secret-keeping.

Awesome superpowers aside, Ozpin doesn’t fit within the mold of superhero, so all of this reads as pretty damning:

Like holy shit, friends. With the exception of one moment, 

notably when Ozpin informs them that “knowledge will only carry you so far,” the cinematography goes out of its way to hide his eyes, if not his entire face. Oz comes across as super shady here, compounded by the close up and centered shot of Ruby’s silver eyes to contrast. Compounded further by the exchange Ruby and Yang have afterwards about how he seemed “kind of off”—an exchange that doesn’t precisely fit with in-world logic (how does Yang know what Ozpin is normally like?), but serves as a clear message to the viewer: Something is UP with this guy.

The problem? This isn’t Ozpin’s introduction.

Imagine a series where in Episode One we only hear about a powerful Beacon headmaster. Someone who bends the rules and let’s Ruby in two years early for reasons unknown. Then by Episode Three we see this guy almost insulting the new group of students (Yang’s eyes narrow when Ozpin says he sees only “wasted energy in need of purpose”) and the entire time the camera refuses to give us a good look at him. That would have set up a character who is legitimately creepy. Someone we know instinctively might not really be on our side.

Instead our introduction to Ozpin is this.

He’s smiling and charming and legitimately kind. He listens to why Ruby wants to come to Beacon before making his decision (aka establishing her agency here). He shares a fond “Aww, you know I’m gonna get what I want” look with Glynda. He brings cookies, for god’s sake. Ozpin’s supposed shadiness falls completely flat here because we’ve already developed positive feelings for him, notably while he was with our protagonist and his BFF headmistress. The intimacy in Episode One implies that this is the “real” Ozpin, whereas a formal speech in front of (from the audience’s perspective) a literally faceless mass sets this up as a “fake” Ozpin, one that comes out when he feels the needs to be stern with incoming students. Or, based on information we learn later, when he’s pulling from another personality.

All of which isn’t a criticism of RT’s writing. Rather, given what we now know definitively from Volume Six, I don’t think they were invested in making Ozpin into a legitimately shady character. What RWBY is invested in is poking at or outright dismantling a lot of tropes and conventions, which is essentially what they did here. “You EXPECT the secretive, powerful headmaster to be a morally gray kind of guy... so we’re just not even gonna go there. Not really.”

But back to the actual plot. Jaune ends the scene by sliding up and announcing that he’s a natural blonde, another excellent example of precisely the thing women aren’t looking for in a guy. He knows Ruby now so it’s totally cool for him to re-join her, but using that as an excuse to start talking about his looks? Nah. Remember folks, women generally like it when you treat them as more than just a romantic and/or sexual conquest!

But enough about Jaune. We cut to that night where all the newbie students—way more than we’ll actually see throughout the rest of the series—are crowded together in Beacon’s hall, which from a world building perspective is a really great choice. I love what it says about Beacon as an institution: We’re not giving you rooms yet because we believe that most of you will fail the initiation (or at least that’s the impression they want to give the students). There’s a sense of ‘roughing it’ with simple mats and no personal space, the sort of things they’d have to get used to if they’re out traveling as huntsmen later in life. The overall emphasis on community and team work. Like the teams of four, Beacon is invested in setting up situations where the students are forced to work with one another. Particularly with those they might otherwise avoid.

That’s precisely the sort of interaction we get in a moment, but first: a tangent. Okay. So in previous metas—mostly Volume Six stuff—I’ve gotten a lot of pushback for my use of the term “kids” to describe the RWBY gang. Which I get. Post-Beacon most of them are legally adults by our standards and they’re certainly doing Adult Things nowadays. I do think there’s a lot of interesting nuances here—the fact that our protagonist and arguably most significant character plot-wise (Oscar) are both still underage, asking whether Remnant even views age in the same way we do, whether hitting the magical age of 18 suddenly gives you any more insight or maturity than you had at 17 or 16, acknowledging that they were never meant to be out in the world fighting this war and making these decisions yet, so we shouldn’t conflate traumatic necessity with emotional growth—but for the most part fans don’t want to grapple with those sorts of questions. There’s a knee-jerk reaction (particularly from those who are around the group’s age) of, “Most of them are 18. They’re not kids so stop acting like they are.” RWBY has raised a lot of questions for me regarding how I balance “Kids/teens/young adults are people with agency and more maturity than people tend to give them credit for” with “I remember how much of a kid I still was at 18 and know precisely how much I’ve grown in the decade since. I was not an adult then, no matter what the law said.” It’s a matter of acknowledging generational experience without turning into one of those, “Bah! Kids don’t know what the hell they’re talking about” curmudgeons. I’m an adult with a father who dismisses everything I say because he’s got—and will always have—50+ years on me. I’m well aware that it sucks.

Why am I bringing all this up again? Because this scene is just so kid-ish. It’s wonderfully young and carefree! Ruby is writing a letter to her friends in cutesy grimm PJs. Yang slides over with a comment about how it’s just like a sleepover. They acknowledge that Tai would not be pleased with all the boys around while Yang ogles the shirtless guys and Jaune wanders around in a footed one piece. This entire scene has a distinctly middle school or early high-school vibe. Not that adults don’t hang out and chat in super comfy PJs—we totally do—but rather that viewers know how scenes like these are coded. They’re supposed to look young here and even though experience has most certainly aged them, even though about two years have passed since this moment... that’s still only two years. I have a difficult time accepting that we should now view the group’s decisions as irrevocably Adult and Mature (cough-airship-cough) when such a short time ago they weren’t either of these things. And they weren’t meant to be those things. Not yet. I wish that these later Volumes of RWBY were more interested in exploring the concept of (yes) kids forced into the role of adults, as opposed to trying desperately to pretend that they’re adults already with a more worthwhile voice than people with 10, 20, or in Ozpin’s case, a 1,000 years more experience than them.

Anyway. Enough ranting for one recap.

Ruby shares her fears about not making any friends and Yang has her “You’ve just made one friend and one enemy!” line before giving her little sis a legitimate pep-talk. She explains that there are friends all around Ruby, “you just haven’t met them yet.” A near identical perspective to what we heard from Jaune last episode. Which is hilarious given that ten seconds ago Yang was pseudo-insulting the guy.

Seriously though, how is there not more Jaune-Yang interaction in canon? They’re got so much more in common than just blonde hair and anger management issues.

Cue another segue. Right after Yang finishes talking about future friends Ruby catches a sound off screen and we get our first look at Blake since the courtyard.

Yang quite literally drags Ruby over and it is an excellent display of siblings being siblings.

Blake recognizes Ruby as “the girl who exploded” and honestly I’m sad that this didn’t become a moniker for her in the same way “vomit boy” did for Jaune. Nothing like being defined by your embarrassing moments and ridiculous habits to encourage true bonding! My BFF calls me Trout and I call her Hunter and no, I will not expand on the ridiculousness that was my middle school years.

I mean, Ruby starts to tell Blake that she can call her crater face before realizing that this might not be the best idea. The girl is awkward af and I love her.

Yang: What are you doing??

Ruby: I don’t know help me!

God they’re so fucking relatable.

Yang manages to get Blake’s name out of her and then makes the mistake of commenting on her bow. Granted, Blake doesn’t show any overt signs of discomfort here—that would have been too obvious even by RWBY’s standards—but looking back we can assume that any conversation veering towards the one thing she wants to hide wouldn’t exactly endear her to these girls. Blake gets pretty rude by saying that she’ll continue to enjoy her book just as soon as they leave. Yang gets ruder by announcing, right next to Blake, that she’s a “lost cause.”

The book is Ruby’s in though. Now it’s less small talk and more legit interest as she asks what Blake is reading. The fandom has acknowledge to death the “It’s about a man with two souls, fighting for control” line and how that obviously relates to the Ozpin-Oscar situation, but beyond that I’m interested in the fact that we never learn the title of this book. Normally that wouldn’t mean much (only so much world building you can do and book titles aren’t necessarily the sort of thing RT wants to waste time on), except that Ruby specifically asks for it and Blake delves straight into the summary. I wonder if perhaps this specific text will show up again in future volumes. I don’t have any real evidence for the hunch, just the fact that we now know Ozpin has put stories out into the world that relate to his situation, namely The Maidens fairy tale. I have to wonder if perhaps other lives of his created art as a way of coping with their situation—unknowingly truthful accounts that people like Blake read, oblivious to the ways that this fiction might be setting them up to be more empathetic towards the same situation in real life. It just stands out to me that we’re not given a title or author here; that Blake was one of the ones to learn about Ozpin’s immortality off screen (denying us her initial reaction); that comparatively she was one of the more sympathetic during that awful moment out in the snow. It would be awesome if the “lol Blake is a nerd who sometimes reads porn” aspect of her personality actually sets her up to be one of the more understanding people in Volume 7.

Basically, please give me super nerd Blake who starts warming back up to Ozpin because she finds out he’s authored a bunch of her favorite books lol. Or at the very least she realizes that she’s now living the stories she’s long adored; she’s been given the opportunity to extend real support to someone so very like the characters she’s felt for all these years...

RWBY does love its meta.

Ruby admits to loving books too, particularly the fantastical stories that Yang used to read her. Blake is far more pessimistic.

Blake: Hoping you’ll live happily ever after? 

Ruby: I’m hoping we all will.

Hello, conflict of the entire series. As well as many fans’ hope for how it will all turn out. I’m personally not at all interested in a 7+ year investment with this cast only to watch them end on a bleak, or even bittersweet note. Despite what some might claim nowadays, happy endings are far from overrated. Given the state of the world, happy endings are radical.

Blake tells Ruby that her dreams are “Very ambitious for a child,” one of the very few indicators we’ve gotten (along with Weiss’ “Aren’t you a little young to be here?”) that the rest of the students recognize on sight that Ruby is younger than them. I’ve literally never heard one child refer to another, same-age acquaintance as “child.” Especially not when they’re hinting strongly that they’re being naive.

Yang is SUPER proud of that optimism though and starts a tackle hug that leads to them fighting cartoon style, complete with stars, cat noises, and dust clouds. The racket of course brings Weiss over. And by “of course” I mean “Oh look, another excuse she can use to go talk to the only people she knows here.”

We get another handful of great lines—Ruby has known Weiss a day but she was “always on [her] side,” Weiss exclaims that Ruby is “a hazard to [her] health”—but the episode is basically over. Blake blows out her candles and that’s that.

Meanwhile, I can’t believe I just wrote nearly four thousand words on a six minute episode. I’m gonna go re-think my life choices.

Minor Things of Note

“You’re lucky we weren’t blown off the side of the cliff!” Hey there, episode four foreshadowing! Also, Weiss, you guys are nowhere near a cliff. You’re so dramatic.

You can really see the difference in their expressions when Oz gives his speech. Ruby and Yang looked pumped and joyous. Weiss is anxious and unsure.

Still super interested in Ozpin actually using his cane as he leaves the stage. Probably just a random animation choice before they worked out all his character kinks, but if we imagine that his host was currently speaking maybe that’s a quirk specific to him.

We never again hear about “the gang back at Signal” that Ruby is writing to. Just like we never see the friends Yang apparently entered Beacon with (and weren’t meant to given that they were also shadow people). Not that RWBY needs any more characters to keep track of, but from an in-world perspective it is a little strange that they were supposedly super close to all these people and then just... never mention them again lol. 

[sailor-cresselia]

Zi-O Ep 42: OKAY THEN

Just as an aside, with this episode, I’ve officially begun my sixth document for writing these liveblogs. I may have gotten in over my head.

When last we saw our nominal heroes, Sougo’d been dropped into an altered timeline, where Kakogawa Hiryuu is basically ruling as Another Zi-O II. The ‘II’ is significant, because he’s gotten an upgrade. Also, Decade’s here!

Now… on with the show!

-

:whimper:

Okay, so. Geiz is pissed – justifiably so, since he’s lost a lot of his comrades in battle. If defeating Zi-O will help him avenge them, then so be it.

Sougo doesn’t fight back. Drops his transformation, even. After all…

As we see in a flashback, with the orchestral version of Toki no Ouja playing, When they started truly working together, Geiz promised that if Sougo ever went evil, he would make sure to stop him.

Not as a threat by then, but as a reassurance. That he wouldn’t let his friend, even if he wouldn’t put it in those terms yet, become a villain.

(As an aside, that scene? Back in episode 16? Was immediately before the first time we heard Toki no Ouja, making its use here super appropriate.)

So of course Sougo is willing to let him do this. Even if he isn’t the same Zi-O that’s ruling this time… he’s still at risk of going that path. He wasn’t able to stop Oma Zi-O – couldn’t even dent him – so… if this will keep him from rising to power, even in this altered timeline where Hiryuu is in charge…

Then so be it.

And Geiz was going to do it, too. He was flat out aiming to kill Sougo – for the second time in two episodes, because of that whole situation where Sougo nearly got decapitated last episode.

And once again, someone stopping time is what saves him.

This time, it’s Tsukuyomi… with a red cloth around her arm. The same type that Tsukasa has around his, and that Geiz has around his leg.

We know that Geiz and Tsukuyomi are part of the resistence, and said resistance has access to weapons. Tsukasa showed up last week with a LITERAL ASSAULT RIFLE.

For the record? HOLY SHIT, TSUKASA. And stop lurking over around that corner, you’re making everyone (read: me) nervous!

…

Well, he did stop lurking. If only to start walking toward the trio, and say “good going”. Or “that’s it”, in a ‘that’s the way’ type of phrasing.

Just last week, he said that Sougo needed to rely on his friends. Okay, not in those exact words, because he wouldn’t be Tsukasa if he wasn’t a cagey, snarky, asshole, but still. He implied that Sougo needed to rely on his friends.

Natsumi, Yusuke, please come pick up your photographer.

…Oh, and could you also pick up your thief, while you’re here? He’s up to something. Again.

Saying something about how since this world has changed, he can get something nice.

…Having watched Decade now, I definitely like him better with darker hair.

Swartz walks out of the mansion, the one with the statue of Hiryuu in front, and smirks.

-

After the OP, we return to the former 9-to-5 shop. Clearly, a strip of red fabric is the sign of the resistance, because everyone in here – Junichiro included – is wearing one. Heck, even the radio has a band of red wrapped around the base!

Junichiro’s most worried about if Sougo’s the overlords minion – or possibly the overlord himself – because this is an aid house. There are wounded people here – are they in danger?!

He’s so nice!

(I still wonder how much he knows in the normal timeline, but… well, that’s a moot point at the moment.)

Okay, so Tsukuyomi and Geiz don’t know Tsukasa. This implies that the outfit is what he was assigned, and that he’s not technically part of the resistance. And needs to stop doing whatever that is he’s doing with the bread, back there. Seriously, dude, cut it out. Are you just. Picking it apart? Why?!

… … Ah. Junichiro trusts that they didn’t bring the overlord here, because he knows that they know he couldn’t defend the people in the base. He’s not very strong, after all. He used to be a clocksmith. (That past tense hurts so much, guys.) But his next line is. Worrying.

“Time’s always been with me.”

Come on! I like you now! Please don’t do this to me!

And when he repeats that line, it overlaps with Tsukuyomi saying that time’s been rewritten.

Sougo’s explaining how he used to fight along with them, and with Woz.

This is all okay and fine, except for the part where Geiz and Tsukuyomi don’t know who Woz is, either.

Naturally, Sougo has a bit of trouble answering exactly who they’re all fighting against, seeing as technically they’re fighting him… But Tsukasa has exactly zero trouble saying that Sougo’s technically supposed to become the overlord, because he’s an asshole. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy watching Tsukasa, but. Well, there’s no denying it.

Geiz, being Geiz, immediately tries to go on the offensive, only to be stopped by Tsukuyomi, who, being Tsukuyomi, wants to try and trust Sougo.

The more things change, huh?

So, Geiz storms out, because he’s going to stop Zi-O, damnit, no matter which Zi-O it is. For the moment, he’s going to focus on Hiryuu.

Tsukasa, munching on bread: Wow, he’s stubborn, isn’t he?

Sougo, having had about enough of this: You’re actively making this worse!

…oh no, seeing everyone in the front room, including his uncle, terrified of Sougo…

My heart.

-

Now, back to the mansion and it’s throne room, with Hiryuu going to sit on his throne. Interestingly, Another Ghost and Ex-Aid are standing as guards. Huh.

…! HUH! So, Woz’s book? You know how in the opening, we have him showing it to us, and it basically plays a video?

He shows Hiryuu a video clip of Oma Zi-O with the book. Nice.

And here’s Hora, bored and sick of being Hiryuu’s watchdog/nanny/minder, with a red drink. Again, I feel I should note, because when the Time Jackers have downtime, she winds up with one of those a lot. She doesn’t really care so much that times been rewritten, or how Hiryuu watns to take Sougo’s future of becoming Oma Zi-O, but seems to think he’s being a little… hasty. You know, since several of his Another Riders were defeated.

He says he’s just getting started, and that he won’t stop, even with their deaths. This is worrying for a number of reasons.

First, Hora didn’t say they died. Hiryuu did. That’s not a translation thing, either, I don’t think; the phrasing they both used was different, and I’m pretty sure I heard Hiryuu say ‘die’ in there.

This implies that he won’t be able to summon the recently defeated Another Riders again.

So! That’s ‘a little’ worrying!

And the fact that he’s not going to let it stop him, either; that he’s just going to keep using his power to rewrite time. He says this while practically fondling the Another Zi-O watch, holding it reverently in his hand.

…What could this boy have been, if he had never been given this watch? If he hadn’t been soured so badly that he’d be so willing to use it like this?

Woz looks down a bit when Hiryuu makes his ‘I’ll use my power to rewrite time’ comment. Not sure if that’s a ‘distressed’ looking down, a ‘sure you will’ look, or what. But it’s definitely some sort of doubt.

Hi, Daiki, what’re you doing here?

Shooting out the chandeliers? Cool, cool.

Saying that the power to rewrite time sounds super nifty, and that you want to take it?

…Okay that MIGHT be a bad idea, I’M JUST SAYING.

…Last time we saw you, you were giving the Future Note to Oma Zi-O. … …

Oh my god I might not have been as far off as I thought with my “Oma Zi-O is technically Another Zi-O” theory.

I figured it was shot to hell when we almost immediately went into an Another Zi-O arc after I came up with it, but maybe not!!!

(Heh, shot. And we’ve got Diend here.)

Daiki, you’re the best right now.

Not only does he summon Specter and Brave to fight off Another Ghost and Ex-Aid, he uses Blast to just. Shoot the Another Zi-O watch out of Hiryuu’s hand before he can use it.

I love tracer shots, especially when they just nyoom right around the other combatants, and manage to angle the watch right to Daiki’s hand.

Also, Specter and Brave took out the Another Riders, allowing Diend to just take the watch and run out of the room.

UNFORTUNATELY, Swartz is RIGHT outside the door, just lounging around, and freezes Diend. Because of COURSE he does.

The purple bastard takes the watch, and gives it back to Hiryuu, saying that since defeating Sougo is his wish, he’ll leave him to it, and to let him take care of this situation. Hora’s not happy about being sent off with Hiryuu again, but she does still go along with it.

And THEN Swartz freaking telekinetically throws Diend into a WALL, knocking him out of his transformation.

Why is this guy so effective against actual veteran Riders?! I mean, escalating stakes and all, but both Tsukasa and Daiki have been in serious pain after he attacks them. Daiki can barely talk.

“Oh, you like treasure, huh? I’ll give you something good, then… but you’ll have to do something for me, as well, and I’m not giving you a choice.”

He then proceeds to grab Daiki by the hair and send waves of purple energy through him, WITH DAIKI SCREAMING IN PAIN!

Woz looks on with a somewhat… disapproving expression.

-

Geiz. Geiz, sweetie. You do know Sougo, just. You’ve been whammied by temporal distortions, that’s all.

(You know, kind of like the team was doing to the Riders in the early part of the season.)

(Just saying.)

(Even if they weren’t faking it, please let them remember and have gotten their histories back after HeiGen Forever. Come on, Toei, give us that, at least.)

Sougo, depressed: Can we talk?

Geiz, sulking: Screw you.

Tsukuyomi, tired: If we work together, we can defeat Hiryuu-

Hiryuu, asshole: lol no, I’m the only Kamen Rider Overlord we need around here.

Hiryuu: I’m going to replace you as the evil overlord.

Sougo, incredibly depressed: I’m actively trying to not be the evil overlord, okay? You’re going down.

This is not the type of joint transformation I usually like to see, but it’s a really good one! You don’t usually get two forms of the same rider transforming, but Hiryuu is Another Zi-O II, and Sougo is going into the normal Zi-O II form.

Mirror matches are really fun.

… FFS Geiz. “I’d be okay with them killing each other.” STOP THAT.

Sougo, somewhat outmatched by Hiryuu’s ENGERY PUNCHES, pulls out the Grand watch.

Daiki thinks that sure does look nifty. He’s honored that Sougo remembers him.

(Memories were a bit of a ‘theme’, back in Decade.)

He hopes that Sougo will be able to remember his new power.

(Memories wound up being a powerful thing, back in Decade.)

He extends his hand – and both Zi-O’s are paused in time.

Oh No.

Hora and the others aren’t frozen, though – you can see Tsukuyomi’s hair blowing in the wind – and Hora’s not amused that Daiki’s got Time Jacker powers.

“Wow, this is the easiest treasure I’ve ever gotten!” (taps Sougo’s helmet on the forehead) “Sweet. Later!”

Daiki’s ‘Knife Cat’ energy has leveled up since Decade, I see.

…Daiki, Tsukasa, what’s with you two and tapping the kitty on the face? Because you’ve both done it, now. It’s a little weird. I know neither of you are skilled at flirting like normal people, but he is 19 and you guys are coming up on or are in your early 30’s. Cut that out!

So, Sougo tries to go after Daiki, but to no avail, because Hiryuu really wants to end him. Tsukuyomi readies her Faiz Phone X, but-

But Geiz says he’ll handle it.

He leaps in, with Revive Typhoon, knocks Hiryuu off of Sougo, and proceeds to fly right on out of there, carrying Sougo with him.

Swartz says that Hiryuu lost, Hiryuu says that Sougo just ran away.

Swartz: Are you sure he ‘ran away’? Ah well. Maybe we can make use of her…

He looks up at Tsukuyomi.

TSUKUYOMI, RUN!

-

Geiz and Sougo land on a rooftop, dropping their transformations.

Suuuure, Geiz, say that you only saved him because it was a pitiful excuse for a fight. We’ll believe you, no problem…

Sougo clearly doesn’t buy that either, but thanks him in any case. And says that he’s acting like the Geiz he knows.

…Geiz asks what ‘he’s’ like.

…Your memory of the regular timeline is coming back right now, isn’t it? (Please?)

So, Sougo describes his history with his Geiz to this one, while the piano for Over Quartzer plays in the background.

When they met, Geiz was already trying to do him in, and they were always fighting. But eventually… they were both fighting to save the future, and every time they fought, either against or alongside each other, they grew closer together. Though, Geiz hates being called Sougo’s ‘follower.’

Geiz reacts to that bit of news by yelling about why should he “have to be your follower”, and grabs Sougo by the collar.

Sougo: Yeah, just like that! :)

There’s some incredulous looks from Geiz, a scoff, aaaand the mood is killed by the stupid ringtone for the faiz phone.

And then said mood is immediately made worse by the fact it’s Tsukuyomi calling for help.

-

She’s running along the shipping docks, and is caught by… the slow, lumbering Another Build, and the suddenly appearing out-of-nowhere Another Kabuto. Not the matchup of Another Riders I’d have expected, but okay. I guess it makes sense; use Another Build to drive her into a corner, lure her into thinking that there’s only one after her – and then have the speedster zoom in, and disarm/disable her before she can react.

So Hiryuu’s plan is to use her as bait to lure Sougo in, which would definitely work… if Another Build and Kabuto didn’t proceed to get shot.

By Tsukasa “I won’t hesitate, bitch” Kadoya.

With a literal damned pistol.

What the hell is going on in this timeline, and where the hell is Tsukasa getting these guns if he’s not actually part of the resistance?!

Hiryuu – who needs to look up some Rider History, apparently – asks who Tsukasa is.

There’s really only one answer he could ever get.

“Just a passing-through Kamen Rider. Remember that.”

KAMEN RIDE

“Henshin!”

DECADE!

OOOOO, now there’s a nice touch! Not only does the Decadriver have the more recent emblems on it now, but the ring of emblems that appears around Tsukasa as he transforms has them all added in, too!

Decade tells Tsukuyomi to run for it – and, of course, Hiryuu sends his Another Riders after her. Another Build, being the worst of the Another Riders, tries to jump over some boxes, but fails miserably. Looks like his early installment weirdness and overall lack of skill stuck around.

:cackling:

When. When Geiz and Sougo make it to the scene, and they see Decade fighting Another Zi-O II.

Geiz asks who the pink one is.

Sougo: “Kadoya Tsukasa. And it’s actually magenta.”

Sougo: He gets very particular about his color terminology, so you should probably remember that.

… wait gfdi I didn’t realize until right after I typed that line that I used ’remember that’ what is wrong with me? I could have planned that, but noooo…

Geiz tells Sougo to go after Tsukuyomi, that he’ll handle Another Zi-O.

He and Decade argue a bit over who’s helping who, which is adorable.

…oh dear, I don’t believe we saw that Another Zi-O II has a sword until now, did we? Because he has a sword now. Or, well, a long staff that’s probably bladed, and is making energy clock projections every time he spins around.

-

Tsukuyomi runs into a back lot, and freezes Another Build and Kabuto… only for Uhr to unfreeze them. That’s a Time Jacker power, and he’d like to know where exactly she learned it.

And he’s good enough with it that he could freeze the blast from her Faiz Phone X along with her! Dang!

Woz, showing up right after Sougo, says that he’ll take over that particular fight, to which Uhr…

Summons…

A swirl of energy…

That becomes a cable, tying Tsukuyomi up.

… THAT’S NEW.

ALSO, I’m not fond of you pointing that gun at her while you drag her off, young man!

… HUH. Interesting.

Woz says he serves ‘the new overlord’, presumably meaning Hiryuu, since that’s how he referred to him when Daiki busted into the mansion. He tells Sougo to stand down, or he will kill him.

I can’t tell if that’s my imagination or not, if I’m actually seeing his hand tremble in the ‘over the shoulder’ shot of Woz holding the Ginga watch.

Sougo doesn’t want to fight… and neither does Woz. His duties still stand, even in this situation. He lowers the watch, and walks away.

…which duties, Woz? To Oma Zi-O? To Kamen Rider Zi-O? To the Quartzers, whomstever the hell they actually are?

Please explain in the show, because we don’t want to have to wait the six months for the movie to be subbed!

-

Daiki, the Grand watch is not a t-

Okay, well, it is a toy, but in-universe, it is not a toy, so you should really stop tossing it up and down like it is one.

Hora wants to know where he got those new powers.

Turns out… whatever Swartz did, was apparently him giving them to Daiki.

-

Uhr was instructed to bring Tsukuyomi to the mansion, apparently, most likely by Swartz.

By Swartz, who is willing to answer any questions Tsukuyomi has.

Any questions that his little sister has.

Heure clearly did not see that coming, given that he was holding the blaster-mode Faiz Phone almost directly to Tsukuyomi’s head, only to immediately lower it, with a matching stunned expression to hers, as soon as he hears Swartz call her that.

I mean, we’ve seen her being related to him coming for some time now, since she first used her time stop powers, but apparently nobody else did. They were too focused on how she got said powers.

-

In the preview…

Sougo gets Grand back at some point, we’re going to have a massive fight with a whole bunch of Another Riders, presumably against the four in the lineup we see – Woz, Sougo, Geiz, and Tsukasa, in that order – and Decade and Diend are going to have it out again.

But also.

Swartz says the throne will be his soon, over a shot of a very much in pain Woz on the floor – with a decent amount of debris around him, implying he just got thrown into/through a wall.

Uhr’s finally realizing that him and Hora have been being used.

Frankly, he should have caught on after his stint as Another Kikai, when I started telling him to GET OUT OF THERE, but the shot of him trying to back away, dragging a limp Hora, really seals the deal there.

AND THAT’S THE EPISODE.

THIS IS FINE.

I’m lying I’m super worried but also super hyped.

Zi-O is WILD.

[omeglerpsokyeah-blog]

Destiel #34

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You both like destiel. You: [College AU. Cas and Dean broke up a couple weeks ago.] (3:53 am) I know we’re not together anymore, and that you’re angry with me, but the nightmares are back and you’re the only one who can calm me down. CN Stranger: [delayed] what were they? DW You: The normal ones. Same as usual. CN Stranger: Are you breathing? DW You: Yeah, but it's hard. CN Stranger: What do you need? DW You: I don't know. How did you used to help? CN Stranger: Normally I was in bed with you. DW You: That was it? You didn't do anything else? CN Stranger: Normally not. Sometimes I used to sing. DW You: Just feel like I'm in a bubble. Can't come back down. CN Stranger: Put some music on, close your eyes and focus on your breathing. DW You: Okay. Okay. CN Stranger: Drink water. DW You: Don't wanna get up. CN Stranger: I used to keep a bottle of water under my side of the bed. Roll over, it should still be there. DW You: [no reply] Stranger: Have you gone back to sleep? DW You: No. CN Stranger: Anything else I can do, dude? DW You: Stop calling me dude. CN Stranger: I call everyone dude. DW You: You never called me dude before. CN Stranger: Yeah...well- the old nicknames don't exactly fly anymore, do they, man? DW You: Man isn't good either. CN Stranger: Buddy? DW You: No. CN Stranger: What then? DW You: Angel. CN Stranger: Cas...DW You: I know. CN Stranger: This isn't...we're not... DW You: I know. CN You: You're seeing someone, right? Sam told me. CN Stranger: No. DW You: Oh. CN Stranger: Sam set me up on a date. DW You: You didn't like her? CN Stranger: It didn't go well. DW You: Good. CN Stranger: Cas. DW You: Sorry. CN Stranger: You can't just...it doesn't work like that. DW You: But I already apologised for what I did. What else can I do? CN Stranger: We're done, Cas. There's nothing else to do. DW You: Please. CN Stranger: What? DW You: [delayed] I don't know. CN Stranger: Goodbye, Cas. DW You: I still love you. CN Stranger: Stop it. DW You: No. CN Stranger: It's over. DW You: We were supposed to get married, and have a life. CN Stranger: I know. DW You: Please. I'm sorry about what happened with Balthazar. CN Stranger: You can be as sorry as you want. Nothing changes. DW You: Okay. CN Stranger: This isn't fair. This has to stop. DW You: I'm sorry. I'll delete your number. CN Stranger: It's for the best. DW Stranger: For both of us. DW You: It's for you. CN Stranger: Cas. DW You: It is. CN You: Everything's fucked up enough. I should at least let you move on. CN Stranger: Stop acting as if you're the victim here! This is your fucking fault. You ruined /everything/. DW You: I know. CN Stranger: Is that it? DW You: Yeah. CN You: I'm sorry, and I'll leave you alone from now on. CN Stranger: Have a nice life, Castiel. I'm done waiting for reasons that don't exist. DW You: Any reason I try and give you will be seen as an excuse. CN Stranger: I can't do this. DW You: Okay. I'll leave you. CN Stranger: [no reply] You: [two weeks later] Has something happened with you and Cas recently? Besides that. SW Stranger: We're done, Sammy. Let it go already. DW You: No, it's not that. I'm just asking because he's kinda been going off the handles recently. So I was seeing if something could've triggered it. SW Stranger: Like what? DW You: Drinking a lot, doing drugs, not hardcore ones but you know, and just letting anybody take advantage of him. SW Stranger: Sexually? DW You: Yeah. SW Stranger: Its nothing to do with me. Talk to his brothers. He listens to them. DW You: He's not talking to his family. Gabe told me. I'll sort it. SW Stranger: Whatever you say, dude. Like I said, got nothing to do with me. DW You: But has something happened? SW Stranger: Oh my god, Samantha. Like what? I haven't fucking seen him. DW You: Stop being bitchy. I don't know. Have you spoke to him since you broke up? SW You: I'm just trying to look out for him, like /you/ asked me to. SW Stranger: Once. DW Stranger: Yeah, well don't get me involved in it. I told you, I'm done. DW You: Could you just speak to him? Please. Get him to see sense. SW You: Just once and if it doesn't work, I'll never ask you to do it again. SW Stranger: He's not going to answer me, is he? Why would he listen to me? DW You: Because he loves you? SW Stranger: Don't be stupid, Sammy. DW You: Whatever. You'll always be too stubborn to believe that. Just do it. For me? SW You: For him. SW Stranger: Then why did.../that/ happen? Hm? Would you do that? DW You: No. SW Stranger: No defence? DW You: No. I won't defend him for that. But I know he loves you. SW Stranger: Fine. And then you never mention his name again. DW You: Scouts honour. SW Stranger: Cas. DW You: Deaann. CN Stranger: Look. Whatever shit is going on, it needs to stop. You're worrying people. DW You: Why the fuck would you care? CN Stranger: Cas. DW You: Let people worry. I'm just having a good time. CN Stranger: Stop this. Please. You're better than that. DW You: No, I'm not. Tell Samuel that I'm fine, or Charlie or Meg. Whoever it was that asked you to ask me because 'he'll listen to you, Dean. He loves you.' CN Stranger: I told him you wouldn't. That you don't. DW You: I won't. But I do. CN Stranger: Do it for yourself, will you? You're better than the casual sex and drug use. DW m You: Nothing wrong with casual sex if it makes you feel wanted, Dean-o. CN Stranger: What are you trying to achieve? DW You: Nothing. I'm just .. you know. Living. CN Stranger: Sounds like a really great life. DW You: Mhm. CN You: Nightmares have stopped, so it must be working. CN Stranger: Fine. Do what you want. I tried. DW You: Okay. Thanks for caring. :) CN Stranger: Your sarcasm doesn't fucking wash with me. Is this the life you really want, now? DW You: No, Dean. But the life I want, I can't fucking have. And before you say it, I /know/ that's my fault. I fucked up. But this helps, alright? The drink and the drugs and the sex. It helps. CN Stranger: My Cas was better than this. DW You: Yeah, well I'm not yours anymore, am I? CN Stranger: You made sure of that. DW You: You left. CN Stranger: Did you really expect me to stay? DW You: No. Just saying. CN Stranger: You know what? Fuck it. Have fun with your booze, and the drugs, dude. Don't forget to use a condom. DW You: Don't call me dude. CN Stranger: Why? What you gonna do, dude? DW You: [no reply] Stranger: [delayed] I would have given you anything you wanted. DW You: Don't. CN Stranger: Fine. Have fun fucking yourself to death. DW You: No, just. I know that. I know everything you could've offered me. CN Stranger: It just wasn't enough, right? DW You: It was. For anyone else, it will be enough. CN Stranger: But not you. DW You: Would it be cliche to say it's not you, it's me? CN Stranger: Don't you dare insult me like that. You give me a proper fucking reason. I'm owed that. DW You: Trust me, I'm trying. I was going to write you a letter, but I just couldn't fucking get the words out. There was just too much happening and you were too much. Too good. There's no way to describe it. I just like to fuck things up, apparently. CN Stranger: Well I'm so satisfied with that answer. Thank you for giving me the closure to move on. Really helpful. DW You: Sorry. CN Stranger: You have /no idea/ what it cost me. To be with you. To be honest with everyone I knew. But I loved you so fucking much and you were worth it. DW You: Loved? CN Stranger: I can't let myself go back there, dude. DW You: Okay. Good for you. CN You: That wasn't sarcasm. CN Stranger: Sure thing, man. Look, you do your thing if that's how you want to live your life. Just answer your fucking texts once in a while. DW You: I will. And thank you for bothering. Really. CN Stranger: Yeah well...you have a lot of free time when what you thought would be a lifelong relationship breaks down. What can I say? DW You: Dean. CN Stranger: Castiel. DW You: You're my everything. My home. And I'm sorry for the pain I caused you. CN You: Now I'm going to go get smashed and hopefully forget this all happened. CN Stranger: Why? I deserve to know that, right? DW You: I don't know. I'm sorry, and you deserve so much better than that. But I don't know. CN Stranger: That's not good enough. DW You: [delayed] I found the ring. CN Stranger: What ring? DW You: The engagement ring in your top drawer. CN Stranger: Keep it. DW You: No. That's why I did it. CN Stranger: What? DW You: I found it, and I freaked out. CN Stranger: Great. DW You: I won't insult you by apologising again, or trying to justify those actions. CN Stranger: Throw the ring away. DW You: No. CN Stranger: Sell it. Give it away. Throw it in the ocean. I don't care. DW You: No. CN Stranger: Then what are you going to do with it? Give it to one of your fucks? DW You: Your mom told me that we'd get engaged one day, and that she couldn't wait to see me with a ring on my finger. I'm not throwing it away. CN Stranger: Swap it for drugs then. DW You: [no reply] Stranger: What do you want me to say? DW You: Nothing. CN Stranger: [no reply] You: [2 days later] Charlie has the ring. She's going to give it to you. CN Stranger: I don't want it. DW You: Too lateeee. CN Stranger: I'm literally going to throw it into the road. DW You: Okie doke. CN Stranger: It was the stupidest thing I ever brought. DW You: Hm. I don't know. Those iron man boxers were pretty stupid. CN Stranger: Shut up. Tony Stark is a genius. DW You: Not on boxers. CN Stranger: Yeah, well at least those boxers never lost me my whole fucking future. DW You: You have a future, Dean. CN Stranger: Not one I fucking want. DW You: You will. CN Stranger: Don't act as if you know. DW You: I do. You're attractive, and funny, and can sing. You'll find someone and you'll love them. CN Stranger: I had someone! DW You: I wasn't worth it. CN Stranger: You were worth everything. DW You: No, you just thought I was. CN You: I have to go. CN Stranger: Then why did I want to marry you? DW Stranger: Whatever. DW You: I don't know. CN Stranger: [no reply] You: [2:52 am] Can you get a hold of Sam? CN Stranger: What's wrong? Is he okay? DW You: Yeah. I'm just trying to ring him and he's not answering. CN Stranger: it's almost 3am. He came home drunk. DW You: Shit. Okay. CN Stranger: Want me to poke him? DW You: Can you ask him to come pick me up, please? Tell him I'm really sorry for waking him. CN Stranger: Where are you? DW You: Near the bridge. You know on 4th? CN Stranger: He can't drive in that state. I'll call you a taxi. DW You: I have no money. CN Stranger: I'll pay in advance. DW You: Okay. Thank you, Dean. CN Stranger: [delayed] it'll be with you in ten minutes. DW You: Thank you. So much. CN Stranger: Yeah...well...don't want you getting ill. DW You: I'm fine. I was just at the club and some dick wouldn't take no for an answer. CN Stranger: He didn't...did he? DW You: No. God, no. Just got a little grabbsy and when I kept turning him down, he took a swing for me. CN Stranger: Tell me he missed. DW You: Would it make you feel better? CN Stranger: Did you hit him back the way I taught you? DW You: No. Didn't want to cause anything. CN Stranger: Are you okay? DW You: Yeah. CN Stranger: Promise? DW You: Promise. Just sore. CN Stranger: Ice. DW You: I know. Remember from when you came back after getting jumped. CN Stranger: Want me to beat that asshole up? DW You: No, it's okay. I have slept with him before, so I guess he just expected it. CN Stranger: Doesn't make it acceptabke. DW You: I know. But I've been fucking around. CN Stranger: Your right. DW Stranger: You're a free man. DW You: I'm tired. CN Stranger: You'll be home in 20 minutes. DW You: I need a plaster. Remember those hello kitty plasters I used to have? CN Stranger: I remember. DW You: That would work well. CN Stranger: Don't you have them still? DW You: No. I used them all on you. CN Stranger: Sorry. DW You: It's okay. :) CN Stranger: I'll replace them. DW Stranger: I'll send you some new ones. DW You: Don't replace me. CN Stranger: What? DW You: You can replace the plasters, but not me. CN Stranger: [delayed] you're irreplaceable. DW You: Good. CN Stranger: I'll send you more with the rest of your stuff that I have. DW You: What do you have? CN Stranger: Couple of DVDS, a sweater, other stupid things. DW You: I have one of your jumpers but I want to keep it. CN You: I'm wearing it right now. CN Stranger: Okay. DW You: Thanks! CN Stranger: I'm tired of fighting. DW You: Okay. CN You: Do you want to see a cute picture of me in your jumper instead? CN Stranger: Not a good idea. DW You: [img attached: cas stood outside in the dark, his eyes squeezed shut and smiling a wide, toothy smile. he's wearing dean's jumper and his bottom lip is split, with a light bruise forming along his jaw.] Too late! CN Stranger: Cas! DW You: Whaaat? CN Stranger: ...get some ice on your jaw. DW You: There's no ice here, Dean. CN Stranger: I mean when you get home. DW You: Oh. Okay. CN Stranger: [delayed] let me know when you get home, angel. DW You: Angel. CN You: I love that. CN Stranger: ...it.., DW Stranger: It was a...slip. DW You: It's okay. CN Stranger: Nothing's okay. DW You: It will be. CN Stranger: And you know that? DW You: Yeah. CN Stranger: How? DW You: Because we always bounce back. Maybe not together, but we will. CN Stranger: Stop the drugs. DW You: No. CN Stranger: please? DW You: It's nothing bad. Just weed. Sometimes E. CN Stranger: /Please/. DW You: Dean. CN Stranger: You do something for me, I'll do something for you? DW You: What? CN Stranger: Your decision. Stop the drugs. DW You: Move on. CN Stranger: That's a big ask. DW You: Try to. CN Stranger: Then you get your life on track against. DW You: I'll stop the drugs. CN Stranger: No drugs, less alcohol, be sensible with the sex. DW You: Sensible? CN Stranger: Use protection, space it out, no orgies... DW You: Deal. But you have to make an active effort to move on. Go on dates and stuff. CN Stranger: You too. DW You: I'll do what you said. CN Stranger: What's the price to get you to move on? DW You: I don't know if I have one yet. CN Stranger: Think. Ehat do you want? DW You: When you move on, and can say you're happy with him/her, I'll be able to. CN Stranger: It's not going to happen. DW You: You said you'd make an effort. CN Stranger: I will. DW You: That's all I ask. We'll review in, like, 3 months? CN Stranger: I want you. DW You: [delayed] You can have me. CN Stranger: I can't. DW You: Why not? CN Stranger: What you did. DW You: [very delayed] Okay. CN Stranger: I can't trust you. DW You: I know. You have every reason not to. CN Stranger: You're not even trying to fight. DW You: I have no argument in my favour. CN Stranger: That shouldn't marrer if you really.,,really wanted me. DW You: I've tried to fight for you. I want you back. But I can't keep begging when I know I've done the bad thing. CN Stranger: Try. One more time. DW You: Come back. Please. I'm so sorry for hurting you. CN Stranger: We can't go back to the way we were. DW You: We can start again. CN You: Any rules you want. CN Stranger: You ruined my proposal. DW Stranger: You could have just said no. DW You: I don't think I would've. It just scared me. CN Stranger: I can't have you do that again. I can't. DW You: I won't. I promise. CN Stranger: How do I know? DW You: You don't. You have to trust me, which I know is a lot to ask. But I won't. I swear. CN Stranger: Baby steps. DW You: Baby steps. CN Stranger: I love you. DW You: I love you, so much. CN You: I'm home, by the way. CN Stranger: You wrecked me. All I wanted is that ring on your finger. DW You: I know. I will never stop telling you how sorry I am. CN Stranger: I don't even know where the ring is. DW You: On my finger. CN Stranger: What? DW Stranger: I thought you gave it to Charlie? DW You: I never gave it Charlie. I just told you that so you'd stop telling me to give it away. CN Stranger: You've been wearing it? DW You: Yeah. CN Stranger: Which finger? DW You: Ring finger. CN Stranger: Which hand? DW You: Left. CN Stranger: Have you fucked anyone while wearing it? DW You: No. CN Stranger: Consider that your promise to me. DW You: Okay. I love you. CN Stranger: If we...ever get to that stage...it'll be your turn to get on one knee. DW You: Deal. CN Stranger: Dinner tomorrow? DW You: Yes, please. CN Stranger: Where? DW You: The diner? CN Stranger: It's not a date right now. DW You: Okay. That's okay. CN Stranger: Just in case... DW You: Incase I mess up again. CN Stranger: Have lube and condoms ready. Is what I neant. DW You: [delayed] /Oh./ Okay. CN Stranger: No promises. But it's been a very long time. DW You: Been a long time since I've enjoyed it. CN Stranger: Wouldn't be a problem. DW You: Never was. CN Stranger: ...balthazar. DW You: No. CN Stranger: Is he...still around? DW You: No. I haven't spoken to him since. NC You: CN* Stranger: You're mine. DW You: I know. CN Stranger: The ring proves it. DW You: Always will be yours. He knew that, too. CN Stranger: How many times? DW You: With him? CN Stranger: Honestly. I need to know, or I'll never move past it. DW You: Twice. CN Stranger: Oh. DW Stranger: I didn't realise it was on more than one occasion. DW You: First was the time. Second was the day you found out and left. I got drunk, and he came over. CN You: And after that, I never spoke to him again. CN Stranger: Was there anyone else? While we were together? DW You: No. CN Stranger: Swear? DW You: I swear. CN Stranger: Swear on something important. DW You: I swear on you. CN Stranger: [delayed] we'll be okay. DW You: Yeah? CN Stranger: Sam will literally tear your throat out if there's a next time. DW You: I am well aware. He gave me a pretty large lecture this time. CN Stranger: Aren't you lucky it was just a lecture? DW You: Sam's a teddy bear. CN Stranger: You haven't seen him really angry then. DW You: No. When he was lecturing me, I was high and crying. So he was nice and got me ice cream. CN Stranger: It's going to be a tough few months. DW You: I know. But we can do it. CN Stranger has disconnected.