#oof I've had this in my drafts for a while I'm sorry

[ohyesididnotjustdothat]

I've somehow been drafted into the Kinn Defense Squad, so I guess here's another KP post. This isn't aimed at anyone except the people who like Kinn but maybe can't reconcile where everything ended w the KP relationship and want to see what someone who can thinks of it.

WARNING: long and rambly (also it's hella late so forgive the incohesive presentation)

also formatting will be shit bc mobile is hostile to any instance of lengthy text

Ok, so to preempt this, I need to make abundantly clear: KinnPorsche S2 was not a sure thing. They very much wanted it to be, hence all the loose threads, but there was never a guarantee they'd catch lightning in a bottle a second time.

With that out of the way, I wanna get into my thoughts.

The KP/VP/KC comparisons: I see a lot of people leveraging the end point of these pairings as evidence that any given one is "healthier" than the others. Brushing aside the v subjective view of what constitutes "healthy" on a genre that plays it as fast and loose w consent as mafia BL, I do not believe the comparisons are even sensible.

On the one hand, you have KP, the titular pairing that, presumably, would be expected to maintain central focus in a future season. Due to its role as the central pairing, it already established itself as such by introducing the most convoluted and extensive storylines for the sake of driving the plot. These were always going to take longer to resolve, and understandably would be most likely to stay open ended by the finale.

Adding on to the previous point, KP was in the position of being most likely to have overarching plots that would drive any possible future season. I'm not being biased, simply maintaining that a show called "KinnPorsche" would most likely continue to focus on the pairing KinnPorsche. (I guess the novel maybe does something different, but it's already established that the show goes off-script and the finale obviously had a primary focus on KP still.)

VP ends up w a pretty neat resolution, and I assume it's because it would likely suffer the most from being left open ended, but you definitely feel the rush with it. If they hadn't finished it with the final post-credit scene, VP fans would have been left with nothing more than a passing comment from a primary and secondary (maybe even tertiary) character about the status of them after Vegas had presumably died. This would have been terrible because, as I learned from a VP friend who missed the post-credit scene, she had assumed Vegas had simply died because she didn't catch Tay and Porsche's conversation. (Oof, sorry, buddy--glad I could correct that for u 😬😬)

KC I would say gets the shortest end of the stick, specifically because it suffers the most from lack of screen time. While you can argue that it was introduced before VP, the coupling itself was split not only between the other pairings, but Kim's investigation subplot. This wouldn't have been as much of an annoyance if it weren't for the fact that Kim never even really got to introduce his findings to any other characters, so it essentially was just a mix of contrived plot advancement (complicated way of pushing Kim to Chay), character insight, and foreshadowing of the overarching conflict.

KC is another example of a pairing that gets left more open ended to leave room for development in a second season, but it suffers more than KP in that it has drastically less development, and therefore comes off as the weakest. (This is not a knock on any pairings, but simply noting that these things are inevitable when you have a 14 episode series--UNCUT--unevenly split between 3 couplings.)

So I've delved into the pairing aspects, and this is where the Kinn Defense Squad comes in, I suppose.

I do see some comments saying Kinn would never break ties with his father, but I am going to say that not only is it possible, but it's the only option that makes sense thematically.

See, with generational cycles of abuse, it can only really end when one generation comes along and refuses to perpetuate it any longer. Vegas's cycle began to break when Korn shot Gun, but there was no guarantee--and I'd argue it's improbable--that the conflict would have ended with that; we didn't get the time for it, but with Korn still a looming threat and Vegas being as vindictive as he is, it's not unlikely that he would still bear ill will toward Korn and his empire (not necessarily Kinn or the main family, but specifically what Korn has maintained that caused all this). This is not a knock on Vegas, simply me pointing out that:

Clearly the resolution with Vegas was mostly unexplored due to episode constraints.

If VP were going to have any continued role in a future season, they would need an accompanying conflict to resolve, which likely would tie into the main conflict.

So the reason I believe VP (and specifically Vegas) gets the neat resolution it does isn't by any particular endorsement/condemnation in the narrative, but simply because it was the easiest to resolve without the guarantee of a second season. They could tie it up nicely right there while still technically leaving room for reintroductions in future seasons.

However, with this, of all the parallels that have been haunting Kinn and Vegas throughout the show, the most stark one is suddenly excised when Vegas's specter is struck down with a single bullet from Kinn's own. To compare these two characters now on the same grounds as before would be odd and narratively incongruent--it just doesn't make sense.

No longer are they the tragic sons languishing under the overbearing weight of their fathers and doomed to ruthless competition--Vegas no longer has that external motivation. Kinn retains his boogeyman while Vegas's was exorcised from the narrative.

I have no doubt that they would have still maintained some parallels in a second season (the figurative ghost of his father would likely have continued to torment Vegas), but it could no longer follow the same formula because Kinn and Vegas lost their biggest platform of common ground.

So whereas that particular resolution was expedited for Vegas by Korn (because it needed to be for a satisfying resolution for him), Kinn's problem is Korn. Kinn doesn't look like a man who can stand up to his father because he isn't--yet. That was going to be a major conflict explored in the second season, most likely. So many threads led to that, but because that second season wasn't in the bag, they had to resolve it just nicely enough to leave fans mostly content with the investment they'd placed in Kinn's character growth (and KP as a pairing--can't have them be sad in their last scene together, but the show doesn't let you forget there's still Korn's shadow cast on them all).

I wouldn't feel as confident in these conclusions if I hadn't spoken to more casual viewers of the show (likely to the largest demographic tbh). They were mostly content with where the show ended, but confused enough to warrant a second season, which I assume is that sweet spot BOC was going for. Sadly, for more invested fans, it left a lot more to be desired for us in terms of resolutions.

This mostly hit me upon a viewing of a reaction series from a casual viewer--most likely the biggest chunk of KP's audience. There was some confusion and some acknowledgment of obviously unresolved plot lines, but with the exception of KC, everything seemed tied up nicely enough for them. In fact, even KC--when Chay refused to delete the video--was left just hopeful enough to leave them satisfied.

So all-in-all, I really hate this whole competition that seems to break out between these different factions in a show that obviously never even got to tell its story to its desired conclusion. Regardless of pairing or character preference, the narrative tends to shy away from clear-cut designations of good or bad, w arguably a couple of exceptions (and by that, I don't mean any of the main coupling characters).

[altaneenarts]

Tag game from @amoxilwrites

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10 all for DSMP

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

162,320 (oml that's a lot)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just DSMP rn

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) in the doorway with you a zombie!george dnf fic based on mushie's apocalypse AU

2) perpetuam memoriam king!george/assassin!dream au

3) The Divine Right DSMP canon-divergent platonic dnf fic where c!George rescues c!Dream with the help of DreamXD (this action has consequences)

4) the crown, the shadow the prequel to "perpetuam memorial"

5) Communion a sequel to "in the doorway with you"

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love answering comments especially if a reader has a question. I'm happy to talk about my fics or characterizations with others. I've made some good friends this way :)

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm well I'd say some of the ones I'm writing now have angstier endings, but of those I have published it's probably "The Divine Right" simply because of how long the fic is. (SPOILERS) It's about losing what you thought you had regained and coming to grips with the truth that the person you knew is no longer what they once were.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The End post DSMP finale fic where DreamXD saves c!George from the nuke

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope. I have yet to get any real hate comments lol.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

So far, no. I've written short snippets of hypothetical scenarios which @amoxilwrites has enjoyed lol. But if I ever publish any, it'll be very character/plot driven. I want the smut to have meaning and give a look inside who the characters are or progress the story somehow—I just find it more engaging that way.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes, back on an old account for the Hannigram fandom.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship

Oof of all time? As much as I love DNF, nothing will compare to Destiel (sorry gamers lol)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Hmm now that depends on what you consider a wip XD I have many planned/brainstormed but of the ones I've actually started writing I think I can finish them all, it'll just take a long while.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Atmosphere/description (I love setting the tone), metaphors, and dialogue

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I can't write pure fluff/happiness for the life of me. I can only write happiness in the contrast of sadness. I also struggle with modern settings as my dialogue tends to lean towards poeticness more than realism. Too many metaphors. Whenever I edit, I always try to cut down my metaphors to one at a time instead of a bunch of wordiness that'll tire out a reader.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done it with Enokian from Supernatural which was very painful given that it's not a complete language and the translators that exist aren't always accurate. So it was a lot of coming up with multiple ways to say a sentence until one was translatable. I also translate Latin pretty often (even now for "perpetuam memoriam") I'll never claim that it's accurate but I do often double check what I want to say through multiple translators before the final draft.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Technically Harry Potter, but I first posted fics for Supernatural

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I'm really happy with how "perpetuam memoriam" is going so far but of those that are complete I'd say "Communion". I really enjoy capturing a morally grey character whose logic is different from the norm in order to rationalize their life; how they can be vicious and kind.

oh gosh i feel like a dsmpblr noobie what other writers do i know well enough to tag *sweats* I think I'll just leave this open to whoever wants to join :D that way I can get to know yall better and can tag you next time lol

[max-nexus]

KGTAC Analysis Pages 2120-2228: The Ultimate Analysis of Ultimate Destiny

First Analysis

Previous Analysis

Next Analysis

Welcome to the world's most delayed analysis post ever! Sorry about how long it took, i got busy for a while there. It won't clear up for a bit (Future note: It has somewhat, that's the reason why this came out THIS LATE) but I'll talk about that at the end of this analysis. Also, I'll begin to refer to the original Home-Skillet as Home-Skillet BETA because KGTAC Act 2 has had it's title drop. Like it was so late that my previous draft before uploading went up to 2070, my reason for not updating is College. (Future Note: Another thing is that some of these notes here are from when the pages originally updated, I'll include notes on if i got something wrong in those old ones.)

2120: I was right! Though i still think there needs to be a handle on the sliding door... Wait, is that a couch in the pool?

KGTAC PAGE 2121

2121: Well i had the right idea of the arrangement. Also… Does he have a second pool? I don't think his window would be facing towards the pool. Like unless I've completely misunderstood the angle Fred's room is at. This ain't right. Here are some more images to get my point across. Though i could be misunderstanding things. Due to this line in page 2098 "You continue forward until you take a LEFT (camera's right) at the end of the hallway." This says that he takes a right. Either way this makes no sense. BOTH IMAGES IN ORDER

KGTAC PAGE 2125

2125: Well, i guess he will never find out WHATS IN THE BOX! Although, it doesn't prevent someone else from finding it.

KGTAC PAGE 2126

2126: Wait, did Fred actually go to Easter Island? I kinda just noticed the portrait. 2127: I think this is Sour-Carbonation (Ana Hepburn) Since they use the same color. Its neat that they're using numbers, as they're on the phone (or in this case, the fax machine) (future note: i probably would've put in an image if i got this out ages ago, but since this came out so late, Ana Hepburn got introduced, so everyone reading this already knows who she is, and thus an image is pointless.) 2128: I wonder what's in the package? It's probably SBURB, that's what she gave in the original 2130: Huh, still in shadow. I think the game is probably in the box (due to the fact it'd be weird to mail a game in an envelope, not much packaging to protect it), but i wonder whats in the envelope. It's truly a mystery. (It was in the envelope)

KGTAC PAGE 2134

2134: YESSSS, FLOPPY-DECK BEING USED IN THE PLOT 2135: LETS GO!!!!…. Wait Fred! you need floppy disks!, you need to grab those too! At best that floppy-disk in there is empty. 2136: Nice, He got the floppy(Future note)... I wonder if he could copy items. Y'know like put an item on the FLOPPY DECK to put it in a floppy disk, put the floppy disk in the computer, copy it onto the computer, and copy that stuff onto another floppy. Breaking the law by copyin that floppy and learning a real life duplication glitch.

Image uses frame from KGTAC PAGE 2139

2148: YOU DON'T NEED A KNIFE FOR VANILLA ENVELOPES, EVERY ONE OF THOSE I'VE SEEN CAN BE OPENED BY HAND!!!! 2152: The plan is joever… What, you expected an in-depth analysis of the previous panels. I did too to be honest but everything there was fairly straightforward, nothing cool to point out. I'm honestly a bit surprised. I was looking for it, the best we got was a UPSIDE DOWN FLOPPY DECK!!!

KGTAC PAGE 2141

2158: Neat, Sburb! Published or made by Sky'Acom. Interesting that its not Skaianet, i wonder if this will mean something in the future. 2159: Neato, It also just came to mind that Fred over here never used a computer before so i can't wait for wacky Sburb Shenanigans, especially if no one else really struggles with the controls.

KGTAC Page 2160

2160: OOF, i was so wrong. It's not a copy of PHOTOCHAT, it's theme park... whatever that is... What the hell is "awesome suicide sequence" supposed to mean 2163: Huh, this implies that a family member of his owns GAME BRO, or he himself does. 2167: So.. that was the Intro Flash, fairly different from the original H-S Intro flash, (Future writings) Like it goes for a Normal homestuck-esque logo at the end, meanwhile in the original it was a fake out for the real logo.

H-S BETA PAGE 70 (end frame)

Honestly there's a lot to the original one, sadly there isn't much else to talk about here as its all fairly different but in ways that's more valuable as an interesting comparison between the two versions of Home-Skillet and not for theorizing about what happens next. I guess since i don't think i ever mentioned it. but Home-Skillet Beta Fred has a non-Sylladex inventory system until the author decided to just give Fred a Sylladex. This is very much unlike KGTAC Fred who just... grabs things... some mind bending stuff here i know. Maybe I'll talk about it in the future when there's more to KGTAC H-S, Like when it gets fully past the H-S Beta in terms of content.

ALSO A PIECE OF H-S BETA PAGE 70

2168: ITS HER (also future note, we didn't go instantly to Ana in H-S Beta)

2169: The name gag here is different, also H-S Beta's name gag is similar to Rose's name gag.

H-S BETA PAGE 176

KGTAC PAGE 2169

2170: Nice (i was right)

H-S BETA PAGE 178

KGTAC PAGE 2171

So yeah these rooms are fairly different. The H-S Beta one was very Rose reminiscent, down to the window. I guess to note whats the same we have

The heater

Books under the bed

The bed itself is the same design wise

a general "clown" theme

Honestly i don't have much to say with this room at the moment... The KGTAC version has a big YELLOW SUBMARINE PLUSHIE. Home-Skillet Beta Ana has 2 SBURB Posters and what appears to be a COMMODORE 64 floppy disk drive next to her laptop COMPARED TO G64 FROM GAME DEV TYCOON

I'm using the Game Dev Tycoon one since it gets the point across, and because i thought they looked kinda similar. But yeah... There isn't that much to talk about here beyond this.

GENERAL ANA COMPARISON: I used two panels to compare Ana's sprites from H-S Beta to KGTAC H-S It's so similar i thought they were the same, I had to overlay the two to notice the head is slightly different. (I used XOR on the KGTAC one and overlayed it on the H-S Beta one) The white pixels on Ana are the differences... I wonder why its so similar when Fred got a more notable coat of paint. y'know like slightly different pockets, belt is a few pixels different, etc. where you can tell it was redone a bit, meanwhile it looks like Ana at best got a slightly different head, with everything else being lifted from the original. I'm not judging, I'm just curious as to why its only the head that's different.

KGTAC ANA COMPARED TO HOME-SKILLET BETA ANA

2174: Neat, she still has a bubble deck

KGTAC PAGE 2181

2181: Cool (Just putting this here, i do like this a lot.)

H-S BETA PAGE 184

KGTAC PAGE 2182

2182: Savor this Folks! We got a nice comparison between H-S Beta and KGTAC H-S, We won't know when we'll run out of comparisons til we do. But for actual notes, Its interesting "The Theories Of The Strange" is the same book from H-S Beta, The difference in color is probably more so because of a filter being applied to darken things. on Commander and Sharks, the narration is notably different, The yellow alien used to be called Viola but is now Jacello. The green one used to be called Shark but is now Leonardo Travesty They also weren't Chefs, instead they went around the universe eating new "lifeforms" The closest things to being chefs was making food. In the KGTAC H-S Panel, the yellow text says "From the Edge(s?) of the Universe, the finest silicone based chefs share their secrets" (Wait A MINUTE, I JUST REALIZED "Commanders and Sharks" is a reference to "Commander Cello" and "Sharkalien") 2193: Wow, this is different 2194: Yeah, totally different. It was much bigger in H-S Beta. Like there's nothing here that's shared. Even the portrait is different, like look, that clown is at a different angle.

H-S BETA PAGE 236

KGTAC PAGE 2194

2201: Huh, i wonder why Ana has a keyboard here, In Home-Skillet she played a Saxophone, Here's the flash of that here.

HOME-SKILLET BETA PAGE 193 (FLASH)

2203: … huh 2211: OH! i actually have something to talk about there, something like this happened in the Home-Skillet Beta, but instead it was done by Fred to enter the basement of his house (which we have not heard of in KGTAC Home-Skillet, maybe its that mystery door?)

H-S BETA PAGE 94

KGTAC PAGE 2211

Extra Notes: I forgot Edmond existed. Edmond didn't do anything (since they're dead.) They also weren't prototyped so they never got to do anything, Instead it was a clown in a Birthday hat

HOME-SKILLET BETA PAGE 159 (FLASH)

Also Here is the Page 70 flash on YouTube for easy viewing if you're interested, all of these videos are unlisted since I didn't create Home-Skillet and it doesn't feel right to make them public. Only really putting them here since it shares some relevance with what I'm talking about here and well i haven't gotten any complaints so far.

HOME-SKILLET BETA PAGE 70 (FLASH)

Apologies for how late this analysis was, It wasn't THAT difficult to make this, its just that i didn't have much time due to starting college and being a bit overloaded with classes. Which meant what free time i had i used to game and read instead of hobbies like the analysis. (Like yeah... I had up to Fred's house part of the analysis done like 6 weeks before posting this... I just got the free time to finish this up recently and also that apology for how late it was was written around that same time.... So Yeah!)

What next for the analysis posts: I still want to make these, This post took many hours to make, Probably over 12 hours total (i should probably start keeping track of the time here) Like my final edit here was about 6 hours which was adding new things i noticed, all the flashes, the ending, clearing up anything vague, and fixing minor grammatical errors. I'm just imagining how long this would've taken if the author didn't take a break. I'll still keep making these, but yeah, These posts are definitely going to be rarer as i don't have a summer break's worth of time and due to the way these analysis posts work. (I talk about every page with anything to note, doing multiple re-reads of relevant sections, and generally looking around both fanventures.)

Whats next for my blog: It'll go back to normal with my reblogs, i sorta didn't want to reblog anything until this update came out so i can explain everything here. Hopefully no one here minds that since i have interests outside of KGTAC and Homestuck. (and even then, i didn't reblog Homestuck stuff, since i wanted to explain things first in an update)

Well I hope you all enjoyed the end of this analysis, I did my best to try and keep this as polished as usual. For some final thoughts, THE BOX is probably going to show up later as a Chekhov's gun sort of thing. another thing, WHATS IN THE PACKAGE!?!?! No, seriously, I've got no clue what it could be, it could be a sylladex, but that's sorta a big box, maybe a SYLLADEX STARTER SET (alliteration my beloved) would make sense in the box, we might get more hints later. Outside of theorizing, i do kinda miss the flash files. With flash files, i can grab assets out of them, which can be useful for seeing things you otherwise wouldn't, higher quality assets, and for asset ripping. You can't really do that with a video. Yet another thing to note is that the Act-Act structure for ACT 2 of KGTAC might be rolls, as that's how it was in Home-Skillet Beta (And yes, KGTAC does have ACT ACTS, in Act 1 it was END OF DAY X). Well anyways, if anyone has any questions, theories, or noticed i missed something, I'd like to hear em.

[fussingoverfassbender]

Hi, I have been a big fan of Fassy for 12 years, when I saw XMEN: First Class and it blew me away. In his day I stored many photos of him with a beard at that time, but, unfortunately, my old computer died three years ago and it did not use hard drives at that time, so I have been searching again, but I have found almost nothing, only the event of MTV with Charlize Theron, a Pinterest session and little else. I would like to know if you have any or if you can recommend an interview or event to look for. Thank you!

Hi there! I must admit, for me it was a bit later, when Days of Future Past was released ^^ Oof, that sucks, though! I'm sorry you lost it all!

That's a tough request, so I'm sorry it has taken a bit for me to reply. I suppose most things are no longer online. I saved most videos I've come across throughout the past years. Most interviews he has a beard in, were during promoting Prometheus, and later he also had a beard when he was promoting Trespass Against Us.

As for photos of these interviews/events... You know what, I've had this ask in the drafts for a while now trying to come up with a solution to your problem, but I will just plug my external hard-drive in and post a bunch of "beard photos" for you. Is that okay?

[gaps-between-stories]

Fic Preview

A sneak peek of my draft WIP OFMD/36 Questions AU.

May 1, 2015

Hey Stede – Jeff – oh Jesus fucking Christ who cares any more. You're never going to listen to this anyway. Might as well address it to myself, I'm the only one who ever has a listen back. Nevermind, anyway, Jack and I didn't work out. Turns out he really hadn't changed at all, and I'm just too fucking old to put up with his shit anymore.

I'm not in the lower mainland anymore. I'm not even in Canada anymore. Anne and Mary finally got hitched, they moved out to Vermont a few years back, and after Jack and I called it quits for the final time I decided I needed a change of scenery. Spice things up again, have a bit of adventure. Plus I sort of owed ‘em both a boon. So I left Izzy in charge of the marina for a while – oh, I bought the marina from Hornigold, by the way. Made sure my mum was set up on her own, and I've been crashing their love nest ever since. Been helping out at their woodshop and on the farm, giving Mary a break from home repairs, have dinner on the table every night – I'm basically their trophy husband. 

Oh! And they had a kid! Sweet little dude, his name is Cooper. I help with him a lot – kids are fucking fascinating, eh? Every day he's learning something new, expanding his entire world each time he wakes up. He turns five next week. I'm kind of obsessed with him, actually. Never really thought that I'd ever do the whole parenting thing, not like I had a great role model for fatherhood or anything. And obviously he's not my kid, like, for real. I'm not his dad. But also, like, he's my kid. My fucking kid, ya’ know? I've been here for basically his entire life, well, the important bits, the bits he remembers. I feel like my world revolves around him.

You always said that I'd make a good dad. I never really believed you, just assumed the easiest way to prevent fucking up a kid was to just not have one. But Cooper? He's the best. And I feel like…I feel like when I'm with him, he makes me my best. 

He asks all sorts of questions, like, every other thing outta his mouth is a question, and oof, some of them are doozies. Like, a couple months back, Anne and Mary had an argument about something dumb, but they had raised their voices, and afterwards Coop asked me if they were still in love. That one was easier to answer, because duh, those two are fucking disgustingly into each other. Do you…" he huffed a watery laugh. "Do you remember when we were that gross? Lucius used to be a little shit about it.

Anyway, they made up like 20 minutes later. But then a week after that he asked me where air comes from. Fuck if I know that one! Kids are wild, man. 

Were your – uh, are your – fuck, mate, I don't even know any more. Did your kids ever go through that phase? I can't remember how old they were when you, ya know, abandoned them? Sorry, that was harsh, maybe. I mean, you definitely abandoned your kids, but maybe it was for the better? God knows I would've been better off if my dad had just fucked off instead of torturing my mum.

[heartbreakhotelcalifornia]

I was tagged by @feather-canyons to spell out my URL with song titles! Thank you so much for tagging me and for sharing some absolute bops! Also, I’m sorry my URL is so long. ✨🌙🤠

Heartbreak Hotel - Elvis Presley

Evil Woman - Spooky Tooth

A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley 

Ring Your Bell - The Band 

Toad - Cream

Born Under a Bad Sign - Albert King 

Roll With It - Steve Winwood

Evil Woman - Electric Light Orchestra 

Angie - The Rolling Stones

Key to Love - John Mayall & The Bluesbreakers 

Hotel California - Eagles 

Operator - Jim Croce

Tenderness on the Block - Warren Zevon

End of the Line - The Traveling Wilburys 

Loves Me Like a Rock - Paul Simon

Cradle Rock - Rory Gallagher 

All My Love - Led Zeppelin

Lean Woman Blues - T. Rex

I’m Free - The Who

Fire Lake - Bob Seger

Ophelia - The Band

Rollin’ and Tumblin’ - Cream

Never Been to Spain - Three Dog Night

In The Midnight Hour - Wilson Pickett

Ain’t Too Proud to Beg - The Temptations 

I tag @wolvesarehome @lovely-menza and @touchmereprise if any of y’all would like to do it! Also I'm sorry if you already did it and I tagged you again!! ⚘✨🌿

[fluffypotatey]

Let’s talk about coins

Specifically, the concept of tossing a coin 🎶toss a coin to your witcher🎶

So, let us begin. 

Now, why the hell am I talking about coins? Well, as you all are probably made very well aware, most of my blog centers around BBC Merlin. And one thing BBC Merlin loves to do is talk about how much Arthur and Merlin are two sides of the same coin. They as well love to talk about destiny and fate and chances. 

So it got me thinking about the phrase “flip a coin.” Usually, when the expression is used, it is for determining the “fate” of certain events. Who will start the game? Flip a coin. Heads team red and tails team blue, and when the coin lands, whichever side is facing up is the “winner” in a sense. Now, how does this all work out in BBC Merlin?

I’ve already said that Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, right? And flipping a coin is for determining a winner or the making of a decision, right? Now, what if....their fate was determined by a coin toss. Triple Goddess lady knew of their destiny and what they would create together (or what they would have), but let’s say merlin got too over protective. Merlin no longer cares for that destiny, he no longer cares what the future will be. All he cares about is keeping Arthur safe, and she sees this. So, to counter it and bring back some balance, she flips a coin because now, in order for peace to be restored, in order for magic to be freed, she flips a coin. Heads is Arthur. Tails is Merlin.

Guess who won?

[albatris]

alright alright fine it's update time. nanowrimo day 25!

I have asks! I have even drafted responses to some of them in my notes app! but since I'm tapping away on mobile due to a fried laptop, I will probably finish them off tomorrow unless I get a serious burst of late-night energy, since typing Rambling Answers to asks on tumblr mobile is....... A Task That Takes A While

today's word count is 44,976!

I was..... not feeling any of today's words for excerpts. mostly because I'm back to working on early story stuff and the only excerpt-worthy bits I wrote today were. kinda Oof. and I feel like I've shared a lot of kinda depressing excerpts that might be giving you the wrong idea abt the tone of this story n that it's all doom n gloom n grief with no reprieve

no! it's a story about some fucked up bastards murdering a giant vampire hivemind and it's exactly as ridiculous and campy as it sounds. AND it's fun

I have just been writing a lot of Oof lately lmao

this excerpt I can explain by just........ early story nat is a traumatised hermit whose self-esteem is a trainwreck and he has barely spared a kind thought towards himself in years. he improves A LOT

anyway here's this

He was monstrous now, most certainly, but he had expected himself to be unrecognisable. It seemed fair. It seemed the only way to justify what had taken place. If he wasn't himself, he wasn't to blame. If he wasn't himself, he could go on believing there was no way he was capable of delivering such incredible violence with such incredible ease. He could go on believing he was not the same creature that had craved it, allowed it, revelled in it. But beneath it all—entrenched in the tiredness of his eyes and the shadows underneath, in the curves of his cheeks and the murmur of freckles across them, in the jut of his nose and the trembling shape of his lips—he was still unmistakably, terribly Nat. The same monstrous person that had always been staring back at him from the mirror. A stranger, undeniably, but not in any way that was new.

"You really are a piece of work, huh?" he mumbled to himself, frowning at that familiar stranger across the sink, the stranger who was never quite strange enough to him. Something pinched at his heart, an ache he'd been routinely pushing down eight years and counting. "No wonder they couldn't bear to look at you."

He pushed it down again.

:)

Nat says things like this every now and then and then much much much later actually discusses his estranged family with Quinn and ur just kind of like. oh. oh no. oh I see

anyway I'm sorry for another sad excerpt I promise I'll make it up to you soon ok mwuah <3

today's mood is ah fuck it's 1:57am again and I'm awake. today's jam is "when my sister's president" by philip labes

farewell sweet followers, here is my to-do list for tomorrow

go get a bad grade in being diabetic

kiss my beautiful best friend on the forehead

buy a new laptop this time for sure (and that is a threat)

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

Chapter 3 The Ultimate (Fake) Boyfriend

Hi guys!! Ahhh, my assessment of "I will post one chapter a day!!!" really went out the window, didn't it???? I'm sorry! I actually was editing this chapter and the next, and they, uh... needed quite a bit. Next chapter mostly. I was hoping that my edits would get me over my writer's block so I could at least finish chapter 4, but, uh... seems unlikely, oof. I've just not been in a writing mood recently, and while I still really like Danganronpa, I've been more into Danganronpa 2, ha. But I figured that since I wasn't posting for TPWM today, I might as well post the third chapter of this for those who were interested. ^-^

This chapter introduces more OC's, which I apologize for. That was one of my biggest challenges with this fic: so many different OC's. And I don't mind writing OC characters, but with so many, it gets a bit confusing as to who is who. If I were to ever finish and publish this story, I would post my list with everyone's names and info separately, so people could refer back to it from time to time if they got confused, especially in later chapters. I think it should be fine here, since not everyone is around.

Anyway! I hope y'all like this chapter. I had to edit it a lot from the original draft, and it is part of the reason I stopped writing this fic, but I've edited it enough that I'm happy with it now, I think. ^-^

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

By the time the car turns into a long driveway— the hour-long drive finally over— Mondo has managed to mostly stuff all of the roiling emotions down. They kept trying to crop up, over and over, but each time Mondo determinedly beat them back until they stayed nice and neat inside his little box. In fact, as they roll to a stop before the largest fucking house Mondo has ever seen, he’s actually feeling pretty good. Yeah, he’s gonna be a goddamn fish outta water, so painfully outta place it ain’t fucking funny, but hey. At least he has Taka. And as long as he has Taka, Mondo’s pretty sure he could walk through Hell and back and be perfectly fine. 

“Alright, boys, we’re here! Taka, if you wouldn’t mind, would you please go help your father get our things out of the trunk? Don’t bring them up to our usual room just yet, though. Auntie Hana decided to change up our typical bedroom arrangements yet again, so she’ll be directing us once we get inside. Mondo-san, as our guest you don’t need to do anything, but if you’d like you can help Taka and my husband with the bags,” Kiyoshi says brightly, shooting them a smile through the rearview mirror. Mondo carefully looks away from her overly fond look, not wanting to deal with that bullshit again, and shrugs casually. 

“Sure, I don’t mind helping. Come on, Taka. Let’s get going,” Mondo states, shooting Taka a lazy grin, honestly glad to be done with the fucking car ride. Don’t get him wrong, he doesn’t hate cars, it’s just… hogs are so much better it’s not even a contest. Why waste time in a cramped, enclosed space when you can be flying free down the road, wind in your goddamn hair? Mondo doesn’t know, truly. 

As he looks over at Taka, however, he feels a spike of concern hit him, causing all other thoughts to vanish. Taking in the familiar face, he can see that Taka looks too fucking pale, his skin almost ashen, and his eyes are wide and full of anxiety. His breath is also shallow, and the grip the teen has on his hand is so fucking tight, now that Mondo thinks about it. It makes his chest hurt to see it, and he can’t stop the way he shifts closer to Taka in the back seat, ignoring the adults who are talking to each other while getting out. They don’t fucking matter, not right now. 

“Hey, Kiyo. You… y-ya doin’ okay, man?” he mutters softly, his words meant for Taka and Taka alone. He sees the hall monitor bite his lip, his eyes darting briefly to his parents before darting back. 

“I… a-ah. D-do not worry about me, k-kareshi. I will be fine. Just… n-nervous. I’ve never had a guest over for the family gathering before and I just… I fear that something will go wrong. Terribly wrong,” Taka replies back after a moment, voice soft and unhappy. Mondo’s heart clenches, hating seeing Taka like this. Humming softly, he squeezes the teen’s hand tightly, hoping he can provide even a little comfort. 

“Yeah, I uh… I get what ya mean, Kiyo. But like I keep tellin’ ya, y’ain’t gotta worry man. ‘Course, I can’t guarantee that things won’t go wrong. I can’t exactly see the future, ya know. But the one thing I do know, without a shadow of a fu- uh. Fricken doubt is that no matter what happens, we’ll always have each other. Ain’t nothin’ gonna change that, Kiyo. Absolutely nothin’. So… uh. Yeah. There’s that.” 

Taka’s eyes begin to water again at his statement, the hall monitor sniffling as he gives him a shaky— and yet still extremely grateful— smile. 

“I… y-yes. Y-yes you… you’re right! We… w-we will always have one another! N-no matter what!” Taka does his best to exclaim, though Mondo can hear how his voice wavers. But that’s okay. Baby steps. 

“Hell yeah, that’s the spirit, ky-kareshi! Now, c’mon man. Let’s go get the bags now, okay? We, uh… we can talk more later,” he mutters with a significant look. Taka nods slowly, and Mondo thinks the teen understands his meaning that they can talk about this fucking con job when they’re alone later. If they get a chance to be alone later. Which he so fucking hopes they do, god fucking damn…

He gets pulled from his musing when he feels Taka pull on his hand, causing him to instinctively tighten the hold. Taka laughs weakly when Mondo tilts his head in confusion at him, the teen looking at their hands pointedly. 

“Ah, kareshi. I cannot exactly get out of the car to help father with our bags if you do not let go of my hand,” Taka says with a small smile, his eyes softer than they had been. And while Mondo feels a little (okay, a lot) embarrassed that he’s still fucking holding Taka’s hand, he can’t find it in him to mind too much. Not when Taka finally looks at least somewhat closer to normal. Whatever ‘normal’ is for the uptight and high strung hall monitor. 

With a muffled curse, Mondo lets go of the pleasantly warm and surprisingly soft hand, smiling sheepishly. Taka must moisturize, Mondo thinks absently as he watches the teen give him one final bright smile, before finally exiting the car. Mondo then promptly shakes the thought out of his head, knowing how fucking stupid it is, and quickly follows after his kyoudai. 

Outside the car, Mondo can’t help but let his eyes slide over to the old and almost overwhelmingly large house before them, a small frown forming on his lips. He slides his eyes all around it, sizing it up to try and form an opinion on it. It’s… well, it’s nice he guesses, if a little run down. It’s a traditional Japanese style house, with wide windows, cream colored walls, and dark brown wooden accents. The roof is sloping dark tile, with little ornaments scattered around. Mondo can see some signs of wear, like stains and some moss growing on the walls, but overall he must admit it’s very beautiful. And very large. Taka told him earlier this week that it’s been in his family for generations, each generation adding onto the house until it became a large, sprawling masterpiece. Mondo knows that Taka is awfully fond of it, telling many happy memories of his times here as a child, so he’s honestly quite intrigued by this place. 

The thing Mondo is most interested in, however, is the small forest he can see peeking out from behind the house. Taka has only told him a little about it, since apparently the teen never spent much time in it as he was always afraid of it as a child, but Mondo is almost itching to head in and explore. A little known fact about him is that he’s always had a fondness for nature and trees, mostly due to the fact that Dai used to take him to a forest near their old apartment whenever their old man was a bit too violent and they needed an escape. They’d spend hours in that forest, walking the trails, exploring the lakes and ponds. They stopped doing that kind of shit once they started their gang, since they never had the time, but Mondo has never forgotten how much he used to love doing that shit with his brother. And hey. Maybe he can somehow convince Taka to brave his fears to head in there with him sometime… shit, wouldn’t that be nice… 

Mondo is brought back to the present when he hears the trunk of the car unlatching, his head turning instinctively to face that direction. He watches for a moment as Taka and Takaaki begin removing the various bags and suitcases, before ambling over. Might as well help out, he figures, since it’s not like he has anything better to do. 

As he walks up he can see that Taka is struggling to remove his own bag, though the teen takes a quick break to look up at him and smile. 

“Ah, hello kareshi! You can feel free to look around if you’d like! Father and I can handle this!” Taka declares, before promptly turning back to continue trying (and failing) to wrestle the unwieldy suitcase out of the pitifully small trunk. With a smirk, Mondo reaches around his friend and grabs the suitcase with one hand, privately relishing in Taka’s squawk of indignation. He has to fight to keep his smirk on his face when he goes to lift the suitcase and almost throws out his shoulder, it’s so fucking heavy. Not too heavy for him, of course, he can lift upwards of 100 kilos without breaking a sweat thanks to Nidai’s training, but fuck was he not expecting the bag to weigh a goddamn ton. 

“Jesus Christ, dude, the hell did you put in this thing?” Mondo grunts as he bends his knees to lift the bag, getting it out and on the pavement with only a little struggle. Taka pouts at him for the comment, crossing his arms with a humph. Heh. Adorable.

“I could have handled that perfectly fine on my own, Mondo!” Taka huffs, glaring when Mondo lets out a bark of laughter. Oh, he has no doubt that the teen is correct, since Taka is surprisingly ripped for a nerd, but something about Taka’s indignation just tickles him. It always does. “What?! It’s true! And to answer your question, kareshi, I have all of my essential items! My uniforms, my personal hygiene items, my summer work… and, of course, all of our school textbooks for this year, as well as our textbooks from last year, just in case they are needed for any of the summer problems! And some books I checked out from the library to cross reference if needed! Like I said, the essentials!” 

Mondo laughs loudly at the earnest declaration, knowing that Taka is being one hundred percent serious right now. The teen’s pout grows deeper, and a spark of actual hurt begins to rise in Taka’s eyes, so Mondo lets his eyes soften and his smile turn gentle. He ignores any possible discomfort at allowing his affection to be visibly seen, focusing on making Taka realize he’s not making fun of him. Not at all. Not ever. 

“Only you, Kiyo. Only you,” he mutters fondly, looking Taka deep in the eyes. The look lingers for a long moment, Taka’s face going slack and his eyes going wide with shock, and fuck does Mondo like it. So fucking much…

He eventually looks away when the moment stretches on a bit too long for his liking, grabbing his duffel from the trunk as casually as he can manage. He then promptly stiffens when he sees Takaaki standing beside the car, once again looking like he’d just been force-fed a lemon. As soon as the man notices his gaze, however, his face smooths into an expressionless mask, leaving Mondo to wonder which is worse, exactly…

“If you two are done, we should head into the house now. Bring your bags with you,” Takaaki says shortly, words clipped. He then turns on his heel and stiffly marches to the house without a word more, his own bag over his shoulder. Mondo darts a glance to Taka, who’s face is light pink with embarrassment. Mondo doesn’t blame him, since he doubts his face is much different. 

“A-ah, I… forgot he was there,” Taka mumbles awkwardly, shooting him a glance. Mondo grimaces in return, raising his hand to rub his neck. Yeah, he, uh… he did too, honestly. He opens his mouth to say this but before he can reply, Taka snaps out of his embarrassment and looks towards the house, grabbing the handle of his suitcase in his hand. “Well! Regardless, we should do as he said! It wouldn’t do to keep everyone waiting needlessly!” 

Seeing as he has no objection to that, Mondo nods and follows after the hall monitor, giving Kiyoshi a slightly awkward smile as they approach the woman, who is standing at the foot of the house. She smiles back, though she doesn’t say anything in return and instead just begins heading up the front steps with Takaaki beside her. Mondo allows himself one second to breathe deeply and stuff back down the anxiety that keeps trying to crop up, before he follows Taka up the stairs. 

He then smirks as he sees the hall monitor struggle getting his suitcase over the first step, snickering as he leans down to pick up the heavy ass thing to carry it up the stairs for the teen. He can see Taka glaring at him from the corner of his eye, but he doesn’t really care. Taka can pout all he wants; Mondo will always help the dude out when it’s easily in his ability to do such a thing. That’s just what a good bro does. 

By the time Mondo has managed to get the heavy ass suitcase to the main deck, Kiyoshi has already knocked on the heavy wood door, her smile bright as she holds her husband’s arm, looking like a kid on fucking Christmas. He can feel his anxiety try to crop back up, his heart beginning to race with it, and he promptly shoves it back the fuck down. Again. Stupid ass anxiety. He doesn’t fucking need to deal with that shit on top of everything, thanks. 

Unfortunately, he can’t quite make it go away fully, though fuck does he try. To his displeasure, it just gets worse a moment later when he hears the latch of the lock click, his throat running dry as he realizes that this is fucking it. He knows that not everyone will be there immediately, since the arrivals will be scattered throughout this day and the next, but still. He’s gonna at least be meeting his kyoudai’s fucking grandma and great aunt, two people he knows are so fucking important to his kyoudai. If they don’t like him, then… then… s-shit…

It’s as the door is opening slowly— so slow that Mondo wonders if the world has been put into slow motion, Jesus— that he feels a now familiar warmth brush his. He doesn’t even think as he grabs the hand with his own, twining their fingers immediately. He can feel Taka squeeze his hand comfortingly, and to his surprise it… it fucking helps. A lot. He can feel his anxiety fade, and while he’s still a little nervous, it ain’t as bad. Not when he’s reminded that no matter what, he still has Taka. That— luck permitting— he’ll always have Taka. And that? Is all that fucking matters.

And so, even when the door finally opens fully and he can see a lined, elderly face jutting out, familiar red eyes sharp and shrewd as they stare out at them, Mondo can’t quite feel the anxiety that tries to take hold inside him. Yes, he knows it’s still there, but it’s not quite as bad. Especially not when he feels Taka squeeze his hand again, as tight as humanly possible. It honestly kind of hurts, but Mondo doesn’t care. He just… he doesn’t care. 

“Mama!” Kiyoshi cries suddenly, her voice bright and happy. She then flings herself forward, her arms wrapping around the elderly lady standing in the doorway, warm and loving. 

Ah, Mondo thinks, looking between the two ladies. So, that’s Taka’s grandma, huh? He honestly doesn’t know how to feel about that. From what Taka has told him, his grandma is warm and loving to her family, but can be overly harsh to those she does not approve of. She’s apparently never been particularly fond of Takaaki, doubly so after the scandal, which has added a lot of tension in the family. If he doesn’t earn her approval… well. Shit. While he may not actually be dating Taka, part of him does kinda hope that his family will still like him. After all, he does really wanna be in Taka’s life for the rest of his, even if it’s just in a platonic light. It would be awkward as fuck if his family hated him all that time. 

“Kiyoshi, my daughter… it is so, so good to see you. It has been far too long,” Taka’s grandma, Kichi, says, her voice stronger than Mondo would have expected. She looks like a typical Japanese grandmother; her hair is pure white, her face is full of lines and age spots, and Mondo can see a cane held in her right hand even as she holds her daughter. But her voice is strong and sturdy, belying her age. 

“I know, mama. I wish I could visit more often. I’ve missed you,” Kiyoshi mumbles into her ma’s shoulder, and Mondo shuffles, feeling a bit awkward watching the scene. He always feels awkward when around loving families, since he never knows what the fuck to do. It also hurts, but that goes without fucking saying. 

Thankfully, the embrace ends soon enough, Kichi pulling back from the hug and giving her daughter a small but happy smile. Her eyes dart away from her daughter then, her face hardening as they land on something. To Mondo’s surprise, it’s not him she’s looking at with such distaste like he would have thought. Huh. 

“Yes, well. That’s not exactly your fault, now is it Kiyo?” Kichi intones, her lips turned downward in a slight sneer as she looks at Takaaki, the man looking the most uncomfortable Mondo has ever seen him. And honestly, Mondo doesn’t blame the man. He’s only been around her for less than a minute and he can already tell that Kichi is not the kind of lady you want to be on the bad side of. 

“Yes. It’s good to see you too, mother,” Takaaki replies stiffly, bowing lowly in respect. If he was hoping to get the lady to soften her death glare, he fails miserably, as her look gets somehow even more pinched. Well. This ain’t at all awkward…

“Mama. We’ve talked about this. Please don’t bring this up yet again. This is a time for family, not arguments. And besides. We have a guest today,” Kiyoshi stresses, darting her eyes over to Mondo conspicuously. Oh, fuck, why the hell did she have to go and do that for… oh, shit, now Kichi is looking over at him too, her eyes narrowing even more as she looks him up and down, her lips pulling down in a harsh frown, and Mondo has no hope that whatever she sees in him she likes. He can feel his heart rise to his throat and not even Taka’s reassuring squeeze to his hand can force it back down. Sh… shit. God fucking dammit… 

Trying desperately to remember all of the shit Daiya taught him about being ‘polite’ when he was younger (that he never bothers to fucking use, because who the fuck expects a goddamn biker to be fucking polite), Mondo bows lowly like he saw Takaaki do. Forcing his voice to go as ‘polite’ and ‘respectable’ as possible, he tries to give a greeting that won’t fuck him over before he even has a chance to really begin. 

“Hello, Gushiken-san. My name is Mondo Owada. It is very nice to meet you. I have heard many good things about you and it honors me greatly to meet you at last,” Mondo says as clearly and articulately as is physically possible. He’s been practicing all week for this and his heart is pounding as his mouth shuts with a silent click, his body still bent nearly in half in his bow. He has no idea when he should stop bowing or if he’s bending too much or too little or… s-shit, he’s fucking this up ain’t he, he’s already ruined everything, oh god, oh fuck, shit-

“Are you going to remain bent over all day or are you planning on straightening your back at some point?” he hears that deceptively strong voice call, the tone clipped and extremely short. Mondo straightens up immediately, his cheeks pink while embarrassment rises within him. With it he can feel the all too familiar anger, but he stuffs that right the fuck down before it can even rear its ugly head. He ain’t doing that shit, dear fucking god. Talk about ruining shit…

As his eyes land on the lady, his palms begin to sweat, heart pounding at the critical look upon her face as she looks him up and down, up and down. Mondo is still holding Taka’s hand and he can see how Kichi’s eyes linger upon the clasped appendages, her frown deepening. Shit…

“So. You are my Taka’s boyfriend, hm? I see…” Kichi muses, continuing her appraisal seemingly without rush. Mondo fights hard to not fidget or even really move at all as she looks her fill. This isn’t nearly the first time he’s been judged and found lacking, but it is prolly the first time that he wasn’t able to immediately rectify the situation, either by punching whatever fuckers would dare insult him, or else by barking insults at them and storming away without a single glance back. He can’t do either here and the unease inside him grows larger and larger with each second that passes. Shit… he’s always fucking hated being judged by people… like, he knows, he knows, he’s a goddamn piece of shit who ain’t gonna do shit with his life. He gets it. He knows. He doesn’t need fucking judgmental people telling him that… 

“Mama,” Kiyoshi interrupts sternly after about five seconds of this, sounding more annoyed than Mondo has ever heard her, “that’s enough. Like I said, Mondo-san is here as a guest, and we should treat him as such. I really do not want any more arguments this year. Please, Mama.” 

Kichi gets a pinched look on her face then, giving Mondo one final piercing look, before nodding sharply once and stepping back into the house. 

“Fine. Come in, then. Hana will inform you of the infernal changes she has made to the living arrangements. Against my wishes, mind you,” Kichi grumbles, taking her cane and slowly making her way into the body of the house. 

Once Kichi is out of their line of sight, Kiyoshi turns to face him, a small, sad smile on her lips. 

“Are you alright, Mondo-san? I understand that my mother can be a bit… intense at times. More so now after papa sadly passed a few years ago. If she ever says anything harsh to you, please let me know and I will have a talk with her. You are our guest and— more importantly— you are Taka’s love. I wish for you to feel welcome here.” 

The lump reforms in his throat, and he harshly pushes it down as he smiles and shrugs as casually as he can. 

“Oh, uh… don’t worry about me, uh… Kiyoshi-san. I can handle things like that. Not like it’s the first time,” Mondo mumbles, his cheeks turning pink. He forces himself to not look at the ground, knowing that would show weakness that he absolutely cannot afford. Unfortunately, looking at Kiyoshi allows him to see the sympathetic look that forms on the lady’s face, which is almost worse. 

“Ah, Mondo-san… well, you should not have to worry about such a thing here, and if you ever feel unwelcome for any reason, please come to me and I will handle it promptly. You are family, Mondo-san. And you are a good person. The things you may or may not have done in the past do not matter in the face of that,” she says softly, earnestly, so much like Taka it’s not funny. His chest aches so fucking bad in that moment, his hand clutching Taka’s tighter than he knows he should, but the hall monitor doesn’t complain. He just holds tightly back, looking at him in a way Mondo both dislikes and likes for vastly different reasons. 

Fortunately, he’s not expected to respond, since Kiyoshi turns back to the door and begins entering the house after a moment. “Anyway, we should head inside now. Come when you both are ready.” 

She and Takaaki enter the house then, though Takaaki looks just about as uncomfortable as Mondo feels. And Mondo definitely doesn’t blame the dude. Taka’s grandma sure is… shit. Daiya always told him not to speak bad about little old ladies, but man… 

“Are you doing alright, Mondo? I- I know you just answered that, but I… I just wanted to make sure,” Taka murmurs to him as soon as his parents are out of sight, his thumb rubbing a soothing circle on the back of his hand. Mondo gives the teen a tight smile, shrugging yet again. 

“Shit, man, I… I dunno. Ain’t exactly like I’m used ta shit like this. Give me a fuckin’ all out brawl an’ I’ll be just fine. Little ol’ ladies who hate me based on looks alone? Shit… but whatever, man. Already promised ya I’d do this shit, an’ I ain’t backin’ out now. I’ll handle it. An’ ya know, ya don’t hafta keep askin’ if I’m okay. Shit’s gonna get old fast. I… shit. How ‘bout this. I promise that if I ever am not doin’ okay, I’ll tell ya as soon as fuckin’ possible. Okay?” Mondo mumbles in reply, eyes intent on his kyoudai. Taka stares back for a handful of moments, before looking away with a firm nod. 

“I… of course, kyoudai. I would hate to bother you, so if you do not want me asking, I promise I will not! And I will trust that you will tell me if it ever becomes too much! And I… I promise I will do the same! Just… know that I am here for you, my friend. And that I personally think you are amazing. Very much so!” 

Mondo lets out a small laugh at Taka’s enthusiastic words, his smile turning genuine at the teen’s seemingly endless passion. He gives Taka one last squeeze of the hand before letting go, feeling a touch reluctant, but he knows he has to. Hoisting his duffel up his shoulder, he nods to Taka to indicate that the hall monitor should go ahead of him. Taka nods back enthusiastically and takes the handle of his suitcase, pulling it along behind him as they enter the house together. Mondo can still feel the unease inside of him, but it’s not that hard to push it down. 

Mondo follows Taka through the large and spacious entrance hall, taking his shoes off and placing them in the wooden box by the door like Taka does. It takes Taka a lot longer than Mondo, considering the teen wears the most ridiculously complicated boots Mondo has ever seen, but he doesn’t mind. Taka always takes stupidly long to do shit and Mondo has learned how to be patient for that kinda shit by now. It used to annoy him to no end, but now he finds it almost comforting. It just shows that Taka will always, inevitably, be Taka. And there’s no one in this world that Mondo would ever want his kyoudai to be. 

After Taka is finally done, Mondo follows the hall monitor down a few spacious hallways— passed some rooms that Mondo looks into curiously but doesn’t focus on too much— until they reach a doorway to a room that has the sound of many voices echoing out. Mondo pauses briefly when he sees Taka slip inside, heart skipping a beat despite himself, but he mentally slaps himself and forces himself onward. Daiya didn’t raise no little bitch, he tells himself harshly. He can handle this shit. It’s fucking fine. 

He firmly ignores the pounding of his heart as he walks into the room, which he is somewhat relieved to find is not as full as he would have expected, only maybe seven or eight people— including Taka’s parents and grandma— either standing or sitting around. But he knows for a fact that this ain’t everyone and sooner or later, he’ll have to deal with the entire brood. Fuck…

“Taka! Oh my god, it’s so good to see you again little Cuz!” a random, feminine sounding voice bursts out, breaking the momentary silence that had descended around the room. Mondo then watches as a chick— prolly in her early twenties, he guesses, based on the brief glimpse he gets of her face— throws herself at his kyoudai, her arms wrapping around him immediately. Mondo smirks when he sees Taka’s eyes widen, his hands hovering awkwardly before they hesitantly pat the chick’s back. Ha. Taka’s always been so fucking awkward with hugs. It’s so fucking cute. It took Mondo months to get Taka use to the occasional hug from him, and fuck, is he proud that Taka is comfortable being hugged and touched by him now.

“A-ah! H-hello, Yoshi! It’s good to see you too, cousin!” Taka stammers out awkwardly, though his voice sounds genuine. And with the name, Mondo is able to realize who this chick is. One of Taka’s second cousins, the one who has the new baby. Taka had mentioned that they are fairly close, which Mondo supposes explains the hug.

Yoshi pulls back from the hug pretty quick, though her smile is wide as she looks up at Taka, seeming to be genuinely happy to see his kyoudai. And Taka looks at her similarly, which makes Mondo smile too. Fuck, but he likes seeing Taka happy… the dude’s not happy often enough, in Mondo’s mind. 

“You’ve grown so much, Cuz! Ugh, you’re making me feel so old! I still remember holding you as a little baby, you screaming your little head off as soon as Auntie Kiyo let you go. Now look at us. You’re a big shot Ultimate Moral Compass at Hope’s freaking Peak, and I have two little kids, a husband, and a gosh darn career. When did we get so old, Cuz?” Yoshi bemoans, shaking her head sadly as she pouts at Taka. In return, Taka lets out a peal of laughter, his eyes crinkling like they always do when he laughs. It makes Mondo’s smile widen, adoring the laugh like he always does. What, it’s not weird, alright?! A dude can like his bro’s laugh! Nothing strange about it… 

“Ah! I would assume sometime between the last seventeen and twenty-five years!” Taka exclaims, his eyes lighting up as he says his little ‘joke,’ darting a glance at Mondo. Who, of course, immediately snorts with laughter, his eyes soft as he grins back at Taka, the hall monitor looking so fucking proud of himself. Mondo notices that no one else laughs, Yoshi even looking a little confused, but he doesn’t care. Taka’s fucking hysterical when he jokes around, as earnest and enthusiastic as he always is, even if the joke itself doesn’t make much sense. The fact that no one else thinks so is what baffles Mondo. 

“Nice one, man,” Mondo can’t help but say, heart light as Taka grins at him, looking so utterly adorable, good god. To his displeasure, Mondo gets distracted from tracing Taka’s features when he hears someone gasp loudly, before footsteps sound. Footsteps that appear to be approaching him, shit. 

Immediately on alert, Mondo turns to face the noise, back stiff and straight, only to blink in confusion when he sees a wide eyed chick staring straight at him. Blinking, he lets his eyes trace her features, frowning slightly. Her face is small and rounded, her nose and lips equally small, but her eyes— which are a deep, mahogany brown— are large as they stare at him unblinking. It’s… actually kinda creepy, honestly… uh…

“Okay, as touching as this little reunion is— and as happy as I am to see you little cousin— I am afraid that this fine specimen has yet to be introduced. Who are you and where exactly have you been all my life???” the chick exclaims, fluttering her eyelashes at him in a way he thinks is supposed to be alluring, but just looks kind of silly to him.

“Uh…” Mondo says intelligently, blinking in shock at the forwardness of the chick. He doesn’t get a chance to say anything more before the chick is ‘causally’ leaning forward, her hand ‘accidentally’ brushing his bicep and squeezing. Okay, ya know what… 

“My name is Miki Sano, but you can call me the girl of your dreams if you’d like,” the chick continues, her smile decidedly flirty. Mondo distantly recognizes the name as one Taka had told him, realizing that this chick is the perpetually single younger sister of Yoshi, but that doesn’t help him at all. He still feels absolutely floored, having no idea what the fuck to do. This isn’t exactly a situation he’s ever found himself in, really. And it’s not like he’s never been hit on before, right? He has once or twice. It’s just that usually the chicks aren’t this forward, since most chicks are scared off by his typical get up, and the ones who approach tend to be put off by his blunt demeanor. He guesses it’s a little flattering, but mostly it’s just awkward…

Thankfully, before he has to try and think of something intelligible to say, Taka is there, frowning as he stares at the hand still clinging to Mondo’s bicep. Oh, thank fuck… 

“A-ah, Miki! I, er… I- I ask you to please refrain from doing that!” Taka exclaims, though his voice is a bit too hesitant to have any real effect. Case in point, Miki just raises an eyebrow at him, head tilted curiously. Her hand is still clutching his arm, though, and Mondo has to fight not to shake her off, not comfortable with the touch at all. He’s never liked people touching him without permission and this is no exception. Shit, but if he weren’t trying to impress Taka’s family…

“Oh? And why not, little cousin? I don’t see why I shouldn’t. Unless… oh, wait… he isn’t taken is he?” 

Taka bites his lip harshly at the somewhat downtrodden question, eyes darting between him and Miki. After a second, Taka nods, though he doesn’t look very certain. Ah… shit… he truly hopes Taka isn’t about to blow their cover before they even really begin, goddamn…

“Ah, well… w-well… y-yes! He- he is, um, taken, so to speak! F-for you see, he is, um… I mean, that is to say, he is my… m-my- um… uh…”

“I’m Taka’s boyfriend,” Mondo interrupts when it becomes clear that Taka cannot continue, the teen’s face bright red and looking painfully uncertain and uncomfortable. He shoots Taka a glance that he intends to mean ‘calm the fuck down, dude, just act natural,’ but he doesn’t know how well Taka understands it. If anything, Taka looks more freaked out now, not less. Aw, shit…

The effect of his words on the room is instantaneous though, as a collective gasp is heard all around. He knows that everyone in Taka’s family knows he’s gay after he came out during winter, the word spreading quickly between those who had not been around during his initial announcement. He guesses based on this reaction that only a select few were told that Taka would be bringing his ‘boyfriend’ with him for the gathering. Well, shit. That’s fucking awkward. 

“You’re what?!” Miki bursts out after a moment of shocked silence, sounding absolutely floored. “I’m sorry, are you telling me that Taka— nerdy, dorky little Taka— somehow managed to score a hunk like you?! And I can’t even manage to score a fricken date with anyone?! What the hell!” 

Offense rises within Mondo at the words, his eyes narrowing as he glares at the chick. Because… okay, what the fuck is that supposed to mean, huh?!

“Hey! The hell ya mean by that?!” Mondo growls lowly, unable to keep it in. He watches as Miki’s eyes widen, the chick finally letting go of his arm to take a step back. While part of him feels a bit bad for scaring the chick, most of him feels fucking relieved that at least he doesn’t have to put up with that bullshit anymore. 

“N-nothing!” Miki stammers, eyes darting between him and Taka. “Just… it’s Taka… you know? Mom told us he came out over winter— which I fully support by the way! Go gay rights!!— but, uh… I mean, I never would have thought he’d, you know… actually get a boyfriend… I mean, mostly because he always said he wasn’t interested in dating, so… y-yeah.” 

Mondo’s shoulders relax a little at the comment, realizing that she’s kind of right, even if he still doesn’t quite like the way she said that shit. But honestly… he can kinda get it. He would also be shocked if he heard Taka got a boyfriend after all the insisting he’s done about how he’s uninterested in things like that. Not that it’d surprise him that someone would fall for his highly lovable and endearing kyoudai, definitely not! He’d be more surprised if anyone didn’t immediately fall for the dude, to tell the truth. Just… it’s more that he wouldn’t think Taka would want that sort of thing. Which the dude clearly doesn’t. Which is why he’s fucking here in the first place. Not that anyone else knows that, but still… 

“As fascinating as this interaction is, I believe we have more important things to deal with at the moment. Such as, perhaps, introductions,” a wry, aged voice calls out suddenly, cutting through the somewhat tense silence that has arisen in the room. Mondo’s head instinctively turns to face the foreign voice, his back stiffening immediately. Because standing by the entrance of the room, at least a good forty centimeters shorter than himself, stands someone who Mondo can only assume is Taka’s infamous Great Aunt Hana, her eyes shrewd as they stare at him. She looks similar to her sister, with piercing red eyes that seem to stare deep into his soul, though she seems less disapproving and more… curious. Maybe. Or maybe he’s just seeing what he wants to see, really… 

“I think Auntie Hana is right,” Yoshi calls, looking sternly at her younger sister, “introductions are what are more important right now. But, for the record, I have no problem believing that little Taka has a boyfriend. He’s a wonderful person and anyone who can’t see that must be blind.”

Mondo grins at the words, nodding his head firmly in agreement. Hell yeah, that’s right! That’s the kinda shit he’d been saying for months! Damn, he thinks he and this Yoshi chick are gonna get alone just fine, heh… he can see Taka’s bright red face when he turns to look at the dude and while he had intended on looking only briefly, he can’t quite seem to tear his eyes away… 

“Anyway! My name is Yoshi Winters, I am one of Taka’s many cousins. It is a pleasure to meet you, Taka’s boyfriend,” Yoshi continues after a second, her eyes shining mischievously as they look at him. Mondo’s face heats up when he catches the look after finally tearing his eyes away from his kyoudai, feeling oddly nervous about something. Whatever, it don’t matter… “My husband, Alex, is currently upstairs with our two children, who are sleeping after the long car ride. I’m sure they’ll be up soon enough, eager to meet new people. Just a warning; my eldest— Samantha— is very much a talker and if she gets you in her sights, you will be subjected to an hour long rambling conversation about subjects only she understands.” 

“Sounds like a conversation with Taka,” Mondo mumbles under his breath, smirking as he looks up at the teen next to him. He makes sure to keep his eyes and smirk soft to ensure the dude doesn’t think he’s making fun of him, since he most definitely isn’t. At all. He can see Taka’s pout and glare, but he can also see a softness in return in his eyes, so he thinks Taka understands that he doesn’t mean it in a bad way. Not at all. 

Yoshi must have heard his comment since she’s smirking as well, her eyes lit up with that mischievous light again. She doesn’t comment on it and instead just continues to look at him, her head tilted pointedly in his direction. Ah… fuck. It’s his turn to introduce himself, ain’t it…? Fuck. 

Straightening his back as much as he can, he looks around the room and smiles as nicely as is possible. Which he knows isn’t that great, his smile has always looked a bit awkward, but whatever, he can’t fix that shit now. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Yoshi, and I am honored to have been invited to this family gathering,” Mondo says the practiced words carefully, forcing his voice to be as strong and assured as possible. He knows he could do better, though, shit… “My name is… uh. My name is Mondo Owada. Taka and I go to school together. It’s good to meet you all.” 

As soon as his name has left his lips, he can see the effect it has on both Miki and Yoshi. While before they’d been looking at him curiously (and a little sullenly, in Miki’s case), after he says his name, he can see their eyes widen, both chicks gasping softly and taking half a step back. It’s so fucking clear they recognize his name and are now fucking afraid of him, like everyone fucking is. He can feel their eyes as they dart back and forth between him and Taka, and it makes him feel like utter shit. 

He does all he can to shove it down, not wanting to ruin shit anymore, but he can’t help the discontent that rises inside of him at the fearful glances. It just gets worse when he hears Taka’s aunt let out a soft hum, the lady looking him up and down curiously, though she doesn’t seem disapproving. Though, again… maybe that’s just wishful fucking thinking… 

“Mondo Owada, hm? An interesting name,” Hana muses, causing Mondo’s stomach to clench uneasily. Shit… Hana pauses for a second, letting the moment sit, before continuing, voice a bit brighter than before. Maybe. 

“You are well met. My name is Hana Masuda, though you may call me Auntie Hana if you would like. Most people do. This is my husband, Akiro Masuda,” Hana gestures to a silent man Mondo hadn’t noticed before, who is standing to her right. The man bows slightly in greeting, Mondo bowing equally in return. It makes Hana smile, small as it is, and Mondo can only hope he didn’t mess this entire thing up. “So, you are Taka’s boyfriend, then? You are not what I imagined you to be.” 

The words cause Mondo to wince despite himself, shoulders bunching up with tension. Because… shit. Yeah, he’s not what he’d imagine Taka’s boyfriend to be like either… heh. 

And then…

“Hmph. I’ll say. He looks like a thug.” 

Mondo can feel his body tense more than it has all day, his heart beating quick at the all too familiar insult. His wide eyes dart over to the source of the words, his hands clenching when he sees Taka’s grandmother giving him a shrewd, clearly disapproving look. Well. If he was at all wondering whether she actually approved of him or not…

Chest tight and throat thick, Mondo watches dully as Kiyoshi rounds on her mother, eyes full of a silent fury he’s only ever seen his kyoudai have, the glare as impressive as Taka’s always has been. It honestly makes Mondo feel worse. Oh, fuck… 

“Mama! How on earth could you say such a thing?! That is not at all true and it is very disrespectful to say something so hurtful towards a guest!” Kiyoshi cries, tone very unhappy. Mondo clenches his hands as tight as he dares, his chest aching like a bitch, though he forces himself not to focus on it. He knew this was going to happen. He knew Taka’s family would never accept him, knew they’d see him as nothing more than a no good, criminal thug. Taka’s old man does, so why wouldn’t the rest of them? It’s not a surprise. It really isn’t. 

He wishes it didn’t hurt quite so badly, though…

“Oh? And why exactly shouldn’t I say that daughter? It’s not like what I said is untrue. We all know full well who he is, so why pretend otherwise?” 

Taka stiffens up next to him, the dude clearly feeling indignant on Mondo’s behalf, and Mondo wishes he could tell him not to bother. That it’s okay. That Mondo… that Mondo gets it. Yeah, it sucks balls, and he wishes shit was different, but the fact remains that he’s a goddamn piece of shit who’s done some horrible things in his life. It’s not other people’s fault when they see that and judge him accordingly. Why Taka sees anything in him at all, Mondo has no clue. He doesn’t deserve it. Christ knows he doesn’t deserve it. 

He’s never deserved Taka. Never. 

Shit like this is why he never thought of having anything more than this with Taka, though. More than… than what they have. It’s already more than he deserves. Anything more than that, and… shit. Shit. He can’t be thinking this shit.

“Kichi, that is enough. This is not the time for arguments, little sister. It does not do to judge a person on looks alone, as you well know. A person’s character requires more time to be determined,” Hana interjects before anything else can be said, her voice hard and unyielding. Mondo doesn’t even know what to think of it, as twisted as his insides feel. “Now, it has been a long day for all of us. I believe it would be good to allow our guests to retreat to their rooms and freshen up before dinner in an hour. Is that understood?” 

Despite himself, Mondo finds his eyes darting up when a thick silence descends around the room, feeling somewhat anxious as he looks over at Hana. He watches as the lady stares steadily at her sister, who is glaring steadily back. After a moment of this staring contest, Kichi grimaces and looks away, annoyance plain on her face. 

“Very well, ane. If that is what you think to be best,” Kichi grumbles, every inch the disgruntled granny she is. Mondo would find it amusing that even old ladies bow down to the demands of older siblings, but he’s not really in the mood to find anything amusing, really… 

He jolts a second later when he feels a gentle hand touch his shoulder, eyes wide as he looks up into soft, concerned scarlet. They are watery and are bleeding their emotions like always, and it takes Mondo’s breath away, his heart clenching pathetically. He can see a small, shaky smile rise on pale lips in his lower periphery, the eyes he’s still staring into speaking volumes that he can barely understand. He tries his hardest to smile back, but he can feel how shaky and unstable it is. His weakness shames him and he thinks that Taka would be so much better off without him. 

But Taka… Taka doesn’t seem to care. Taka just beams at him, his eyes lighting up like a goddamn Christmas tree, and it makes his heart hurt even worse. But it also… it also helps. Seeing Taka smile at him, having him so close, so near… it reminds him once more that no one else fucking matters. That it doesn’t matter if the whole world hates him, just as long as Taka doesn’t. As long as he has Taka… that’s all that fucking matters. He just has to hope that he never angers Taka enough to make the hall monitor hate him again… he honestly doesn’t know if he could handle that. He truly doesn’t. 

“Very well then. I shall explain the changes I have made,” Hana asserts after a moment of silence, her sharp eyes darting over to him and Taka briefly, head tilted curiously. Mondo doesn’t really notice it, though. He’s too busy looking at Taka, who looks steadily back. “Kiyoshi, you and your husband will be in your old room like usual. However, I felt that Taka and his boyfriend may wish to have more privacy than sleeping on your bedroom floor, so I cleared out an old closet that I believe should be big enough for them to share if they want it.” 

Hana pauses, before addressing him and Taka directly, eyes sharp on them again.

“It’s not much, but it’s the best I have to offer if you two wish for privacy. It’s up to you both if you wish to sleep there or sleep on the floor of your parent’s room.”

Taka looks away from him then— to Mondo’s private displeasure— and gives his aunt a wide-eyed look. 

“A-ah! I am certain the closet will be fine, Great Aunt Hana! You have my humblest thanks!” Taka exclaims, bowing slightly. It makes Mondo smile, his shoulders relaxing again as he looks at his kyoudai. He can still feel eyes on him, judging him, but he forces himself not to focus on it. He’s just here to pretend to be Taka’s boyfriend. It doesn’t matter if his family doesn’t like him, it’s not like they’re actually dating. Shit, if anything it’s better if they don’t like him. It means they’ll all prolly be glad when they ‘break up,’ and maybe that relief will make them feel more charitable towards him when they ‘go back’ to being just friends. Silver fucking linings and all that. 

Mondo watches dully as Hana smiles at Taka, her eyes soft and fond as she looks at the teen. She nods her head once and begins moving towards the doorway, clearly expecting them to follow her, her gait steady and even.

“Come along, then. I will show you where your living space will be.” 

Mondo shares a look with Taka, before shrugging and following after the lady, who he notices doesn’t use a cane like her sister does. As he exits the room, he doesn’t look at anyone and just keeps his eyes firmly ahead of himself, not wavering a centimeter. He knows it’s fucking rude, but at this moment he just doesn’t care. He’s so fucking tired and it’s not even night time yet. He just needs to remove himself from this situation before he quite literally explodes. 

Once out of the room, Mondo is able to relax only slightly, glad to no longer be stared at. He knows that he’s not in the clear yet, though, so he doesn’t let himself pause to catch his breath and just continues to follow Hana. They eventually reach a flight of stairs that Hana wordlessly climbs, not even looking back to see if they’re still following. Without a word, Mondo bends down and grabs Taka’s monstrosity of a bag as he begins to climb after the lady, the burn of the weight honestly soothing. He can feel Taka’s eyes on him as they follow, but it’s easier to handle just Taka than everyone else. It always has been. 

It’s not long after they reach the top of the staircase that Hana stops outside a plain sliding door, turning to face them at last with a piercing look. 

“Here we are, boys. Like I said, it’s not very large but I believe you both will have enough space to at least lie down and sleep, should you chose to stay in here. You can either keep your things on the shelves, or else you can keep them in your parent’s room, Taka,” Hana says, looking steadily at them both. She opens the closet and gestures for them to look inside, which they do after a moment’s pause. 

It’s… well, small would be an understatement. He can tell it was originally meant as a fairly large walk in closet, perhaps for storing cleaning supplies. He thinks that it’s roughly a meter long and a little under two meters wide, making it a decently sized closet, but a small ass room. And honestly, Mondo doesn’t know if he’ll even fit inside while lying down, since he’s roughly 187 cm and he can’t imagine the room being much wider than that. If he does fit, he can already tell it will be a tight squeeze, especially with Taka added into the mix. He does notice that there is a sleeping mat placed on the floor that takes up almost the entirety of the space, which he guesses will make sleeping on the ground somewhat softer, but prolly not by much. All in all, it leaves a lot to be desired as sleeping spaces go.

But honestly… it sure as hell ain’t the worst place he’s slept. After their ma died when he was eight, he and Daiya were kinda homeless for a year and had to sleep in some… interesting places while Dai worked on figuring out how to gain custody of him so he wouldn’t be shipped off back to their piece of shit old man. He had never minded, though. Not even when they had to sleep under an overpass in the dead of winter, huddling together for warmth. It wasn’t that bad as long as he had Daiya there with him. And just like then, he thinks that he can handle sleeping on a thin mat in this small ass closet just as long as he can have Taka beside him. 

He looks over at Taka and finds that the teen is already looking at him, his lips pulled down in a frown as he cocks his head in silent question. Mondo shrugs in reply, nodding to show that he doesn’t mind sleeping here. Especially if it means they don’t have to sleep on the floor of Taka’s parent’s room, which he shudders to think of. Talk about fucking awkward as shit… Taka lets out a little hum, turning to his aunt with a wide smile and another shallow bow. 

“I believe that this will work, Great Aunt Hana! Thank you very much!”

Hana smiles softly back at him, her eyes softening from the intense stare she had been giving them before. She then reaches out and gently pats Taka’s cheek, humming under her breath. 

“Good. I am glad. But, before I leave, I must say that it really is good to see you again, my nephew. Words cannot express how much it gladdens me to see that you have finally taken an interest in dating. Seeing you happy, my child, is what I have always wanted the most. If he makes you happy, then that is all that matters in my mind,” Hana murmurs to Taka, eyes on him alone. It makes Mondo a little uncomfortable to see such a private and tender scene, especially one that is kinda about him. Neither participant seems to mind his presence, though, so he just stands there, feeling awkward as fuck…

“A-ah… t-thank you, Great Aunt Hana… that- that means quite a lot to me… a-and yes. He… he does make me happy. Very much so,” Taka replies quietly after a moment, his eyes shiny and his lips pulled up into a gentle smile. Taka looks over at him then, causing Mondo’s heart to begin racing stupidly, mouth going dry. He ignores it like always and just smiles gently back.

“That is wonderful to hear, dear Taka. Now, I shall leave you two alone to get settled in your room. If you find that you dislike it, I’m afraid that the only other available space we have is, as I’ve said, with your parents. You are welcome to sleep there instead, if you prefer. Either way, I shall let you both rest and will see the two of you in an hour for dinner. Farewell.” 

With that, Hana retreats down the hall, away from them both. Mondo watches after her for a minute, until he is certain she is out of view. The second he determines that she is, he allows himself to fully let out the breath he’d been holding and relaxes against the wall, his exhaustion hitting him like a ton of bricks. 

Fuck, was that tense as shit. Don’t get him wrong, Mondo has faced a shit ton of tense and awkward situations in his life. But that had to be one of the worst, more so considering he was unable to escape it like he usually would. And he just… he hates being forced into awkward, tense situations without knowing what the fuck to do. He always has. It’s one of the reasons why he created his ‘tough guy biker’ persona, honestly. Tough guy bikers don’t have to worry about being judged. Tough guy bikers just beat the shit out of anyone who dares to fucking judge them. In many ways, it’s easier to just be a tough guy biker who doesn’t give a shit about what other people think. 

As Mondo relaxes against the wall, he can see Taka staring at him anxiously, the teen shifting awkwardly like he wants to say something. Mondo knows exactly what he wants to say— of course he does, Taka is the easiest book to read on the shelf— and he can feel his shoulders start to bunch up again in anticipation at the stupid as fuck question he knows the teen wants to ask. And when Taka finally opens his mouth…

“Mondo… I was wondering-“

“I’m fuckin’ fine, Taka, god fuckin’ dammit,” Mondo growls, eyes narrowing with annoyance. Shit. He adores his kyoudai, but fuck can he be a broken record at times. He’d hoped his promise would make this shit stop, but apparently not…

He feels even more like shit when Taka reels back, his eyes widening for a second, before narrowing with hurt. It pains Mondo to see his friend look so upset, especially knowing it was his fucking fault, but he just… shit. Maybe he ain’t doing that great with all of this… he wants to be, wants to be able to do this shit no problem, but… fuck…

“I… I- I know that, my kyoudai. That wasn’t what I was going to ask. I remember your promise, after all, and I know you would not go back on that,” Taka mutters, eyes falling to the ground as he fiddles with the hem of his jacket. All of which makes Mondo feel even worse, god fucking dammit… Taka continues before Mondo can try to apologize, the teen looking uncomfortable and unhappy, which guts Mondo completely. “I… I was going to ask if you’d like to get some rest. I don’t know about you, but I am feeling… very tired. And I would like to rest before the rest of my family arrives. If you would rather not, then I can always give you a tour of the house I suppose, once we get our things settled. O-or I- I could show you the forest… I- I know how much you enjoy things like that, kyoudai, so if it will make you happy I will be more than willing to take you and explore the place together, though it truly isn’t that big, I don’t even know if it technically qualifies as a forest, really, and-“

“I think some rest would be fine, man,” Mondo interrupts as gently as he can, knowing that if he doesn’t then Taka will just keep on going for the next hour. Taka jerks his head up to look at him, eyes wide and tight, though they soften when they see that Mondo means what he says. It helps him relax again to see Taka relax, the tension flowing right on out. 

With that decided, Mondo moves to close the door carefully, the room a lot more claustrophobic with it shut, but he honestly prefers that to the paranoid idea that Taka’s family is watching him. Moving in sync like they usually do, he and Taka begin putting their things away, no more words needed as a comfortable silence rises between them. Since the space is so small, they don’t have much room for storage, but there are several shelves and drawers that have been cleared for them to put their things in. Mondo keeps his shit in his duffel for efficiency’s sake, while Taka removes his uniforms and begins hanging them up along the back wall where a pole resides. It will end up giving them even less space, but Mondo doesn’t complain, knowing how important his uniforms are to Taka. He just feels glad he was able to convince the dude that he doesn’t need to wear his arm band during the break. Small fucking victory, really. 

Once everything is set up to Taka’s liking, Mondo watches as the teen gingerly kneels on the floor, grabbing the blankets they’d found on one of the numerous shelves. Taka then lies on the thin mat, shifting to get comfortable. Mondo blinks in surprise when he sees Taka hesitantly open his arms while looking up at him so fucking shyly, which Mondo knows from experience means that the dude wants to hold Mondo, for once. They don’t do shit like that often, since it embarrasses the hell out of Mondo, but he’s feeling just shitty enough to oblige his kyoudai. 

He quickly removes his stupid ass ‘respectable’ get up and changes into something more appropriate for sleeping, which is hard considering how cramped it is. He’s proud to say he only hits his head three times, letting out muffled curses for each. Once that is done, Mondo awkwardly lies down beside Taka, the mat as uncomfortable as he imagined. 

There’s a split second of awkwardness now that they’re laying down together, but Mondo quickly moves passed it as he shifts to do what Taka had wordlessly requested. It’s hard considering he barely fits in the space in the first place, but after some careful shifting and maneuvering, Mondo is able to rest his head gently atop Taka’s surprisingly comfortable chest, back to the wall, listening to the teen’s steadily beating heart. He can hear the beat speed up, which in turn causes his own to follow suit, but it’s not bad. He even kind of likes it, even if he has to awkwardly bend his legs to not bump them into the wall. 

As he curls his right hand lightly into Taka’s undershirt, he feels Taka hesitantly wrap his arms around him, pulling him slightly closer. Mondo goes easily, burying his face into Taka’s neck and breathing deep. As he’d said, they don’t do shit like this often, have maybe done it a total of three times including now, but… but Mondo kind of likes it. Being the one who is held for once. Don’t get him wrong, it makes him feels weak as shit, but as long as he doesn’t focus on that, it’s… it’s not that bad. In fact, it’s really, really fucking nice. So… so fucking nice…

“I know that what happened earlier was not… ideal, kyoudai. And I cannot say if it will get any better or not. All I can say is that I am so very glad you are here with me, my dearest friend. And that I am more grateful than words can say to have you,” Taka whispers into his hair, arms tightening until all Mondo can feel is Taka. Still, Mondo tries to press closer, his leg hesitantly moving between Taka’s so they can get even closer. He can hear Taka’s breath hitch— which makes him doubt himself greatly— but he feels so much like shit right now, and being close to Taka like this just… it makes him feel better, alright? So, he pushes aside the doubt and snuggles close, turning his mind the fuck off for once. 

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever man. Ya know I’d do fuckin’ anythin’ fer you. Just… go the fuck ta sleep, Taka. We can figure the rest a’ this shit out later. Okay?” 

Taka hums softly at the order, nodding against the top of Mondo’s head. He doesn’t reply back and just squeezes him tightly once, before relaxing against the mat. A few minutes later, Taka is fast asleep, the hall monitor clearly exhausted if he willingly would fall asleep during the middle of the day. But Mondo doesn’t mind. While he doesn’t think he’ll be able to get any actual sleep, it’s good enough for him to lie here with Taka and just… exist, he guesses. Be with his kyoudai, one of the most important people in his life. Not worry about how unworthy he is, or how he doesn’t deserve this at all. It’s fine. He… he’s fine. 

He’ll have to be. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ha, I hope y'all liked the OC's. I kind of based Yoshi's interaction with Taka on how I interact with my own younger cousins. They were born when I was 7 (they're twins, one boy and one girl) and I remember holding one of them when they were only a few months old. The other didn't let me since he was a bit crankier than his sister. And now they're graduating from high school next year and I'm in graduate school. Oof. I don't get to see them often since they live across the country, but whenever I do I always have that whole "why are you getting so old!!!! Stop!!! Aging!!!!!" thing. I'm the baby of my family, with only one older brother, so seeing younger family members age is distressing, ha.

[tsarisfanfiction]

3. 14. J. U. 🙃

Sorry this is a bit late, rl slammed me kinda hard last weekend...

I'll admit I'm guessing which numbered ones you're referencing because there were two numbered lists on the same day, oops, but as one of them needed a specific fic referenced I'm hoping I've got the right list!

3) Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?

Hmm... there are a few tropes around that I'm less fond of - ABO springs to mind immediately, as well as coffee shop AUs - but honestly I am a big fan of deconstructing and twisting tropes so if given the incentive and requisite curiosity of "I wonder how this would go if..." I don't think there's any trope that I would say I'd never write (I once said I'd never write a genderbend, then one happened, so...) I'm less likely to write most romance-based tropes, though, mostly because romance isn't something I generally enjoy writing quite so much.

14) What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

Oof, that's a hard one. There's quite a few I ignore for one reason or another, mostly because I've reached the point where I write how I write and throwing something different into the equation is just gonna mess me up, but I wouldn't necessarily say they're bad because what works (or not) for me doesn't mean it doesn't (or does) work for someone else. We're all unique people, our minds work in unique ways, and different tips and tricks therefore work on all of us.

One that has screwed me over a few times though is "write at least x words a day". "x" varies, but for me I find that if I can't write that day, trying to force it just makes me hate everything, and then I feel guilty for not writing anything at all and it can take me a while to kick myself out of that and remind myself it's supposed to be a hobby. It's not a requirement, or a chore. This isn't school, or a job. This is something I do in my free time and I shouldn't force it.

J:  What’s your favourite fanfic trope?  Have you written it?

Back in the trope questions again, I see. I should admit that I'm actually bad at these because I can never actually identify "tropes" on demand, if that makes sense. I know a few core ones, but for the most part it's more "what sort of thing do I like?" and yes, I definitely write what I like! Caretaker needing to be taken care of is top of the list, probably, and anyone who reads my stuff will be very familiar with that creeping in!

That being said, if I had to pick a trope I haven't yet written but would like to experiment with one day... Soulmark AUs. They fascinate me, although (like Hanahaki Disease, another one I love to read) there's a prevalence of it being romantic soulmates in almost all the fics I've read, and I have a definite preference for platonic soulmates. But then again, I managed to write a familial Hanahaki, so maybe one day I'll manage to write a soulmark AU that fits both the trope and my own desire for more platonic/familial love fics taking centre stage.

U: Is there a pairing you would like to write, but haven’t tried yet.

Eh, if I'm honest I'm less fussed about writing ships and more platonic pairings, or ones that could fall either way (see: CaeJose from JJBA, which is a fandom I have yet to write for at all). And when we look at platonic relationships, oh there's so many I'd love to dabble in at some point.

That being said, I have just remembered one bizarre One Piece kinda crackship I came up with a few years ago and thought that I might write it but so far haven't... (it was gonna be a Wano arc AU and I thought it up before Wano happened... we're now the other side and needless to say "AU" doesn't even start to cover it ahaha)

Oh, and how could I forget Kaito/Aoko from Detective Conan/Magic Kaito. Admittedly I have something half-baked sat in my drafts so technically I have written something for them, but I've not finished anything worth posting for them. Then again, I've also yet to write any Shinichi/Ran or Heiji/Kazuha, either.

40 Questions — Meme for Fic Writers

Fanfic Writer Ask Meme

[goldshadowsarchive]

1 // 4 // 12!!

@aniimalspirits / munday questions / accepting

1. How do you draft your threads usually?

when i remember to actually draft them i just do that without changing anything. unfortunately i have the habit of putting my threads in there confidently saying 'yeah i'll do that in a second' and then suddenly it's been 84 days. so @ anyone i might owe a reply, from the bottom of my heart, i'm just a forgetful bitch & i'm sorry

4. What grammar rule you think you cannot overcome even though you train through writing replies?

oof. actually no idea lmao. not sure if it's grammar but i hate when people get then / than wrong like it's so easy please. or similar things like that. also instead of just ending a sentence, i'll just put a comma and then another and another because i'm german and that's just who i am. ( + i just googled. that counts as sentence construction lmao )

12. Have you ever been in a tough situation because of an RP partner bailing out on you and then resurfacing back so abruptly?

i've had a lot of weird situations while rping. i mean it's been ten years so yeah lmao but i don't think that's one of them. i did have some people just suddenly unfollowing / blocking me for no apparent reason which is fine obviously, they do them, but it's just confusing when a day earlier they just filled out interest trackers or sent asks etc. so that gives me a bit of anxiety sometimes. if someone really do just bail for a while and then comes back, i'm usually just happy that they're back bc who knows what's going on in their life.