#operation babylon

[phoenixtakaramono]

OPERATION BABYLON - PART VIII

aka the butchlander sugar baby AU.

Tumblr Navigation (note I have not shared the prologue here with its premise setup; I’ve only started sharing this twitter threadfic on tumblr starting from the 2nd 🔞 scene): I | II | III | IV | V | VI | VII | VIII

Update Schedule: weekly/ biweekly

Although Billy initially didn’t know what to make of the whirlwind Manhattan high-rise house tour Homelander insisted on bringing him on, he thinks he’s figured out Homelander’s game and the unspoken rules by the time he’s carted off to the second flat. So he settles into the routine of making the appropriate “ooh” and “ahh” noises hearing the Yank regale him, the foreigner, about the supposed history of each place.

(You can read the rest of the threadfic update here!)

Keep in mind, all of my AU Butchlander threadfics on Twitter are the unpolished first draft versions of what’ll eventually be polished up into long fics on AO3 under the Shock and Awe series. So you may regard this threadfic as an experimental first prototype and exclusive preview whose contents may or may not be changed in the future final draft version. We’re just loosely playing around with ideas and concepts for now!

If you don’t have a Twitter account, screenshots are provided below the line break so you can read this update on Tumblr as well:

TBC

(A/N) - Place your bets on which location Billy’s going to choose as his base of operations y’all voted for it so…. From this update, if there’s things I’d probably change from the threadfic in the edited AO3 version is going more into detail about the fascinating lore of 432 Park Avenue (here’s the tl;dr vid of why it’s the most hated building in NY), draw out the scene of the g0ry reveal to heighten the tension of what Billy had just missed out seeing, and provide a better description of the architecture of Hudson Yards shops. Alas I am constrained by Twitter’s character limit per tweet, haha, and this is the first prototype so I’m not too worried.

[girlactionfigure]

[sumerazukamori]

Seishirou Sakurazuka? What are YOU doing in my Cardcaptor Sakura show?

[therighthandofvengeance]

Just Some of Ivanova & Sheridan’s Peak Sibling Moments in The Coming of Shadows

POINTS OF DEPARTURE [S02E01]:

“You were never worried about being diplomatic before. Don’t disappoint me by starting now.”

REVELATIONS [S02E02]:

“He’s [President Clark] on Gold Channel One; wants to speak to you. Unless you’d like me to have him call you back later—” “Ivanova.”

A DISTANT STAR [S02E04]:

“Why don’t you take a break?” “Why don’t you? …Sir.”

THE LONG DARK [S02E05]:

“You got a plan?” “Just try not to get killed.” “Brilliant.”

SPIDER IN THE WEB [S02E06]:

“You know how I feel about telepaths.” “[Scoffing] Do I ever. You threw one out of a third-story window on Io.” “There was an ample pool below the window.” “I’ll assume you knew that.”

SOUL MATES [S02E07]:

“And lastly, the party honoring Ambassador Mollari’s day of ascension is tonight. All attendees must be barefoot.” “Barefoot?” “Barefoot.”

A RACE THROUGH DARK PLACES [S02E08]:

“Were you like this when you were married?” “Huh? Yeah.” “The woman was a saint.” “Well, at least I’m an intelligent life form, according to the Minbari.”

“You snore.” “No, I don’t.” “Yes, you do.” “No, I don’t.” “Captain, either you snore or last night we had a hell of a breach in the hull.”

THE COMING OF SHADOWS [S02E09]:

“If it’s true, they won’t want that information to get out.” “What information? All we have here is supposition.” “Sheridan’s rule #29: Always make your opponent think you know more than you really know.”

ALL ALONE IN THE NIGHT [S02E11]:

“Now, this is more like it.” “Now, Captain—” “Yes, Commander?” “If you continue this behavior, you’ll just make the other pilots feel inadequate.” “Spoilsport.” “What was that, Captain? You’re breaking up.” “Nothing, Commander.”

THERE ALL THE HONOR LIES [S02E14]:

“That’s why I’m putting you in charge to oversee this gift shop— which, I might add, is only a test at this point.” “Why me? I hate this whole idea!” “Exactly! I’m counting on you to focus that hostility with your typical diligence to make sure that this station and its inhabitants are in no way, as you so correctly put it, demeaned.”

“—And the Centauri government will not tolerate such insults!” [Ivanova grabs the doll.] “Well, it’s just a doll. It wasn’t even made by us. Look at the tag, it’s probably been made by somebody down in the bazaar.” “It’s a mockery. It doesn’t even have any, uh— attributes.” “Attributes?” [Sheridan stands up and grabs the doll from Ivanova.] “Do I have to spell it out for you?” “I see, so you feel like you’re being symbolically cast… in a bad light.” “Well put. Ivanova, have all of these dolls removed at once, please.” “Yes, sir.”

“Uh, Commander— how goes the Babylon 5 store?” “Most interesting.” “Aha! You know, I was thinking this might work out after all. We could use the extra money to defray operating expenses.” [Sheridan looks down at the teddy bear Ivanova is holding.] “What is that?” “Hmm. Take a look.” [Sheridan chuckles.] “Bab-bear-lon 5? Oh, he’s a cutie, isn’t he?” “Oh, yeah.” “J.S.?” “John Sheridan.” “Jo— oh. This is supposed to be me?” “Yeah.” “Ah! I want it off my station. I want them all off my station. I want the whole store yanked out, boxed up, and shipped out by 0800 tomorrow. Is that clear?” “I’ll get right on it.” “Um…” [Sheridan takes the stuffed animal back.]

KNIVES [S02E17]:

“Commander. Everything in order?” “Remarkably so. It’s beginning to worry me.” “Oh, you always worry when things are going well?” “I don’t have time to worry about them when they’re not.”

“Delta I, why are you prepping for launch? Delta I, please respond. This is Commander Ivanova.” “Ivanova, this is Sheridan.” “Captain? What are you doing?” “Just going out for a little spin. There is no need to worry. I’ll be back before you know it. [To himself] I hope.”

DIVIDED LOYALTIES [S02E19]:

“Comments, anyone?” “Does the phrase ‘No way in hell,’ ring a bell?”

[jarhara]

Let's analyze...

you know what? I don't really know how to call this

I like my musicals and rock operas bloody and messed up.

My personal top 5 (in no particular order) of these are: Sweeney Todd, Streets, Operation:Mindcrime, The Wicked Trilogy and Repo!

Being in a musical/opera mood lately, I made myself a little playlist, mixing these 5 and in doing that, I found some interesting patterns I'd like to ramble about

so here goes...

"The Setting"

Sweeney Todd takes place in a time of poverty and a strong class divide, Streets is set in the bad parts of a big city, Mindcrime in a world filled with corruption and Repo is it's own little dystopia. All feel pretty similar and I usually imagine Wicked Trilogy in an equally dreary world.

"The Girl in the Tower"

present in Sweeney Todd and Repo, also sorta in Wicked Trilogy (the woman Scarecrow is in love with isn't literally a "girl in the tower" but he sees her like that at first with how untouchable he perceives her).

Shilo is my clear favorite in this group, because Johanna is just barely a real character ^^°

"The Drug Dealer"

technically present in all 5. Obviously Graverobber (Repo) and D.T.(Streets) , Dr. X (Mindcrime) too, even though he does much more (and you could count Mary as helping him there). I personally see the Toy-Master (Wicked Trilogy) more as a club/venue owner but I can see him also being a drug dealer and while not fitting most of the stereotypes, Pirelli (Sweeney Tod) technically is selling a drug (okey, I know this one is a stretch)

"The Serial Killer"

all 5 have at least one murder but only Sweeney, Nikki (Mindcrime) and Nathen(Repo) are serial killers. D.T. get's a price for being the only non-murderer protagonist in this lineup.

It's probably hard to tell who has the biggest kill-count but I think it's notable that Nathen and Nikki both work as assasins for someone using them while Sweeney picks his own victims as he likes.

Scarecrow's (Wicked Trilogy) one murder hit's a little harder since he did bludgeon his only friend and mentor to death.

"The Master in the shadows"

another one you technically get in all 5. Judge Turpin (Sweeney Todd), Sammy (Streets), Dr. X, Mephistopheles (Wicked Trilogy) and Rotti Largo (Repo) all fit the role more or less. I feel like Sammy is the most harmless of the bunch (despite being the only killer in Streets) and Mephistopheles is simultaneously the most benevolent one and the one with the biggest potential to make things much worse if swapped with any of the others.

"The Friend"

(am I slightly running out of cool stereotypes? sorta)

Most of these have a positive influence on the protagonist, Mrs. Lovett (Sweeney Todd) being the odd one out. D.T. has Tex (until Sammy kills him), Nikki has Mary (until he's made to kill her), Scarecrow has his mentor (until he kills him). huh... they all die... seems Mrs. Lovett fits in more then I thought. Only Blind Mag (Repo) serves this role for Shilo, not Nathen, but she still get's to die the obligatory "death of the friend" and Nathen is almost made to kill her.

"Everyone dead, everyone happy"

it's kinda obvious that a grim story doesn't end happy. Sweeney Todd and Repo pretty much end the same with the big bad, protagonist and friend all dead and the girl set free. Nikki isn't dead in the end but he might as well be and Dr. X gets away. And Scarecrow and D.T. both come out of it enlightened in the end, giving them the best endings fitting their low kill-counts.

[8unginfo]

♫ Inhalt / Handlung / Video: Nabucco – Oper von Giuseppe Verdi

Video: Nabucco von Verdi aus der Oper Genf https://youtu.be/wDvPbX3uNig NABUCCO Verdi – Grand Théâtre de Genève - Video ab 30.6.2023 Nabucco: Freiheitswille und Sieg eines unterdrückten Volkes offenbart sich im „Gefangenenchor“ - fast eine italienische Nationalhymne. So sah sich Italien damals gern. Mit dieser Geschichte aus dem alten Testament sprach die Oper von Giuseppe

Verdi verschiedene Kreise an. Nabucco, in der Arte-Mediathek online bis 1. März 2021 Giuseppe Verdis „Nabucco“ Die Aufzeichnung aus der Arena di Verona steht bis zum 1. März 2021 in der Arte-Mediathek Giuseppe Verdi: Read the full article

[afterglowsainz]

the secret of us | oscar piastri

summary: after you break up with your boyfriend you start getting closer with a certain mclaren driver, but you’re afraid of what people might say about your new relationship

fc: dina denoire

warnings: ex!age gap, some ugly comments

request: here

a/n: this request is so perfect because gracie has been my hiperfixation since she released her album so i’m dying to write about her songs! also, i chose carlos for the ex since you said you didn’t mind, anything else i hope you like it <3

—

liked by carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux and others

yourusername vroom vroom 🏎

view all comments

username the queen is back at the paddock

username i hope you know i’m in love with you

username so beautifuuuul 💗

carlossainz55 hermosa🥰 (beautiful) (liked by yourusername)

username the best wag fr

username face tutorial!

username gorgeous girl 🥵

username stunning 😩

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and others

carlossainz55 not a bad start to the season 🏆

view all comments

username last picture goes craaazy

username well deserved podium👏🏽

username carlos in his villain era 😈

yourusername who’s that smooth operator 👀

carlossainz55 🤭

username go king !!!

username calos we can be world champions‼️

liked by oscarpiastri, olliebearman and others

yourusername tourist mode: on 🇮🇹🍝

view all comments

username ugh her !!!

username so gorgeous

bffusername prettiest girl in italy (liked by yourusername)

username did she and carlos broke up?

username ???? why?

username idk she hasn’t been to any gp’s lately and they don’t like or comment on each other posts like they used to

username they also haven’t been seen with each other since the beginning of the year

username they still follow each other tho so idk

liked by f1gossip, oscarpiastri and others

f1wags y/n y/l/n recently with her friends clubbing in milan

view all comments

username she looks so fun 🤩

username does this mean she isn’t going to this weekend’s race either? :(

f1wags doesn’t seem like it since she’s still in italy

username breakup rumors getting louder by the second

username oscar randomly liking this post then unliking? 😭

username he got caught lurking 👀

username if yn and carlos really broke up i’m gonna stop believing in love

liked by francisca.cgomes, oscarpiastri and others

yourusername babylon lovers hangin' lifetimes on a vine

view all comments

username oh no

username 💔💔💔

username wtf does that even mean 😭

username well, taylor wrote it so, you’re probably gonna have to google the meaning

francisca.cgomes face card 🤑

yourusername yours!!!

username omg this song with that specific lyric 😩

username they broke up broke up :(

username hot take but this is probably for the better?? their age gap was weird anyway

username get out of here

username no because who looks like that after a break up 😭

username right??? like she seriously has to be the prettiest woman ever

username guys they unfollowed each other i’m not okay !!!

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others

yourusername i missed this place 🏁 thank you so much mclaren for having me🧡

view all comments

username OMG???

username last thing i ever expected was seeing yn as a mclaren girlie ???

username no cause she has always been the ferrari it girl this gave me whiplash

username never beating the prettiest girl allegations

mclaren it was so nice to have you yn🧡 (liked by yourusername)

francisca.cgomes next time you’re coming to alpine with me!

lilymhe no no no, williams next💙

yourusername i’ll go to every garage at this point 🤣

username the way carlos was at the podium and she didn’t even glance at him once 😭

username and then she was photographed talking to charles and alex 😭😭

liked by oscarpiastri, alexandrasaintmleux and others

yourusername i enjoy walking camden market in the afternoon☕️

view all comments

username yn in her london boy era ???

username and who is the london boy? 🤨

username i just know the breakup did her good she’s glowinggg

username yn in london is all the content i need

bffusername find me a british husband while you’re there

yourusername already networking!

username so pretty💞

username and they call her the it girl

liked by landonorris, yourusername and others

oscarpiastri london for the weekend🍵

view all comments

username he’s sooo boyfriend coded

username last pic made me feel woman things

username omg not him lowkey matching with yn🤭

username first two pics AND both in london⁉️

username coincidence??? or could they be…

username weird way to ask me to marry you but okay

landonorris london boy😎

oscarpiastri not you too🙄

username “you too” ???

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, oscarpiastri and others

yourusername we’re happy free confused and lonely in the best way ❤️

view all comments

username when you’re in a swiftie competition and your opponent is yn

alexandrasaintmleux happy birthday my yn💞

lilymhe happy happy birthday love💘

bffusername 22 years being the prettiest, coolest and kindest soul in the planet🤍

username i can’t believe she’s 22 😭

francisca.cgomes i don’t know about you🫵🏽 but tonight we’re going drinking

charles_leclerc happy birthday, yn!

flavy.barla happy birthday prettyyy💗

landonorris happy bday🥳

oscarpiastri happy birthday🤍

liked by f1wags and others

f1gossip ex-wag y/n y/l/n celebrating her birthday party with her friends and allegedly oscar piastri

view all comments

username allegedly??? babe that’s clearly him

username last thing i expected was to see lando and oscar celebrating yn’s birthday

username 2ND PIC??? 🤭🤭

username they’re so hot

username oscar and yn together was not on my 2024 bingo card

username homie hopper

username are carlos and oscar even friends? 🤣

username i’m sooo invested in this couple

username oscar being always on her likes makes so much sense now

username my man was WAITING for her and carlos to break up to shoot his shot

liked by carmenmmundt, oscarpiastri and others

yourusername so happy to be back at the mclaren garage this weekend 🧡 best birthday present

view all comments

username and she was on oscar’s side of the garage🥹

username petition for mclaren to invite yn to every grand prix (liked by yourusername)

username it still feels weird to see her at mclaren and not ferrari but i’m so happy she’s still going to the races 💕

username am i the only one who finds it weird that she moved on from carlos to oscar that fast?

username yes

username she wants to be a wag so bad 🤣

username or maybe !!! just maybe !!! she’s just living her life and happened to meet a guy she likes who also happens to be a driver, mhhh 🤔

username the way they’re not even official 😭😭 y’all are making up things where there aren’t

oscarpiastri so my present was not the best? 🤨

yourusername close second!

liked by f1gossip and others

f1wags oscar piastri and y/n y/l/n at the grand prix’s after party

view all comments

username cute!

username awww they look good together 🥰

username OSCAR CAN YOU FIGHT

username i don’t understand why people glorify yn so much like she’s clearly a grid bunny it’s gross

username yeah the only reason she’s famous is because she dated a famous guy

username oscar deserves better

username i like them together 💞 they seem happy

username someone needs to save oscar from her 🤮

liked by yourusername, logansargeant and others

oscarpiastri monaco sight-seeing💐

view all comments

username well good morning to you too oscar piastri

username how did he bag a baddie like yn 😭

username by being socially awkward i assume

username forget him i want HER

username he’s really committed to the carlos hate train huh

username adopt me! i can be the fly on the wall!

username yn is stunning 😍

username the only couple ever

yourusername 🥰🥰🥰

oscarpiastri ❤️

[unsolicited-opinions]

The Revolution Will Not Be Aestheticized

Being Gen X is weird. Mine will be the last generation to remember a world without the internet and was also the first to wholly embrace it.

Gen X knows what life was like before social media...but has still mastered the art of passive-aggressively liking posts as a form of communication.

We're a small generation, but I'd argue we have a unique perspective and I want to point out something which I think is more obvious, more visible to Gen X, than it is to Millennials and Gen Z.:

Enjoying pop culture used to be something you did. Now, it helps define who you are.

I was obsessed, as a kid, with Marvel comics, Dr. Who, and Babylon 5. Friends had weekly get-togethers to watch the X-Files or The Simpsons. Liking pop culture wasn't unusual. You could like it passionately, obsessively even.

But it wasn’t your identity.

If you outgrew an interest, it didn’t seem like a personal transformation to you or to your friends. It was just...what you're really interested in right now. The stakes were low.

Today, it seems like your fandom is often your flag. It’s in your bio next to your gender identity, orientation and neurotype. (A couple of those are in mine, too).

I'm trying to say that there is a very real difference between being really into the music of Taylor Swift and being a Swiftie.

There's still plenty of discussionabout what we love, but now it helps defines who we are.

I might be a Little Monster and in the BTS Army, right? And a Whovian Cumberbitch. These are signifiers not of interest, but of identity.

That shift from consumption to identity may seem subtle, but it has profound consequences.

It turns preferences into moral positions.

If your fandom defines who you are, any critique of it feels like a critique of you. And if your fandom’s antagonist gets a redemption arc which displeases you? That’s not character growth, that’s betrayal. (You've seen people behave this way in fandoms. It's a parasocial relationship with fictional characters.)

Now take that operating system - tribal, emotional, morally binary - and plug it into political activism. What do you get?

You get the US "Pro-Palestinian" movement circa 2024-25.

To be clear: Gaza is a humanitarian catastrophe. Palestinians deserve dignity, safety, and justice.

Critiquing how Americans engage with this issue is not a dismissal of its urgency. It’s just asking whether our engagement is real...or if it is performative roleplay and treated like a fandom.

(Below: This fanart would be just as absurd if Snape was holding an Israeli flag.)

Because much of what’s happening on social media and college campuses doesn’t look like activism. It looks like fandom.

And not in a metaphorical sense. I mean literally.

Moral binarism:

Palestinians are coded as pure underdog heroes. Israelis are assigned the role of irredeemable villains. There's no space for Israeli trauma, Palestinian complexity, or the millions caught in-between. Just like fandom, nuance gets in the way of the story.

Costumes and catchphrases:

Keffiyehs are worn like people used to wear Hogwarts House scarves.

Slogans like "from the river to the sea" function not as political demands as much as they are ritual, social affirmations.

You chant them because they’re what you say to stay in good standing.

Canon enforcement:

Say the wrong thing (acknowledge Hamas's atrocities, quote an Israeli peace activist...) and you’re cast as a villain. Activist spaces now police ideological purity the same way fandoms used to (still do?) flame you for liking the wrong ship.

Emotional scripting:

TikToks from Gaza with moody filters and sad piano music mimic fan edits and commenters post, "I’m crying, I’m shaking," because that’s the expected affect. It's parasocial politics. And it's all about showing their feelings.

Lore and side quests:

Protestors debate which historical analogies are "correct" based on what's most satisfying. The create infographics that function like lore wikis, and design protest aesthetics with merch-tier detail. Some organizers even "brand" their encampments like pop-up installations.

Want a kiffiyeh with which to display your ideological alignment? Guy Christensen sells them through a link in his bio.

This is fandom logic in political form: it's identity-driven, emotionally performative, virality-optimized, branded and monetized.

The problem is that Fandom has no endgame. Fandom is forever. There’s no "solving" Game of Thrones - you just keep angrily resenting that awful final season.

Politics needs resolution. If you apply the fandom model to real-world conflict, peace becomes anticlimactic. Moral ambiguity feels like betrayal. Ceasefires don’t trend on social media.

Look at how the "pro-Palestinian" movement won't condemn Hamas regardless of the people of Gaza marching en masse to demand Hamas leave Gaza.

When the identity matters more than the cause, the cause becomes a backdrop.

Such "activists" center their feelings of righteousness rather than centering the lives at stake.

Performative grief displaces material action.

Sharing content becomes the work.

Listening becomes optional.

Look at how Irish protestors embraced the term “Paddystinian" - blending diasporic solidarity with performative identity. Or consider how Peter Tatchell was arrested at a pro-Palestinian march for opposing both Israel and Hamas - and was immediately denounced online not for being wrong, but for deviating from the script.

This isn’t activism. It’s cosplay with real-world stakes.

Real political work is boring, frustrating, and morally dissonant. It demands strategic thinking, coalition-building, and compromise. It doesn’t fit neatly into a feed, and it rarely makes you feel emotionally whole, but it’s the only thing that changes anything.

If you’ve grown up in fandom, you’re not broken or unserious. You’re just swimming in the water you were raised in.

What they need to ask themselves, though, is: Are we trying to help, or are we trying to feel right?

Because the people on the ground don’t need you to wear your Guy Christensen kiffiyeh and recite the ideologically approved positions you don't understand. They don't need your fan art. They don't need you to harass Jews online.

They need peace, they need dialogue, and they need all of us to stop treating war like content.

[vintagegeekculture]

So, a friend of mine on Discord said something interesting, and I feel like you might have thoughts on it. So. What do you think of the idea of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as being "The Shaw Brothers for kids", a sort of gateway drug for "the kung fu genre"?

Not the Shaw Brothers, but Golden Harvest. Let me explain: 

I’m going to sound like a conspiracy theorist when I say this, but I believe the New Line Cinema “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” (1990) movie was actually a money laundering scheme by the Chinese Mafia, specifically, the Sun Yee On Triad. 

Looking into the role of organized crime in martial arts cinema is a rabbit hole that goes very, very, very deep...and comes out somewhere very shocking at the end.

You mention the Shaw Brothers, but there was another Hong Kong Producer who was the only credible rival to the Shaw Brothers (and who eventually surpassed the Shaws) in martial arts movies: Golden Harvest’s Raymond Chow….a man who started off as the Shaw Brothers’ talent division, but who eventually founded his own rival studio to the Shaws (with rumored triad financial backing), and who made Bruce Lee, Angela Mao and Jackie Chan stars. Raymond Chow is widely, and extremely credibly, believed to be a middleman for the Hong Kong Triad, the Sun Yee On, who used Golden Harvest as a front facing money laundering scheme, as claimed by Frederic Dannen in "Hong Kong Babylon," and Yiu Kong Chiu in "The Triads as Business," books I recommend if you are at all interested in the topic of organized crime in the Hong Kong film industry.

Raymond Chow was also the producer and primary funder of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies. I mean, what does it mean when your movie is entirely produced and funded by a guy well known for being a triad middleman and money launderer?

And all of this happened at New Line Cinema, a borderline independent film company…one known for having dodgy financials it’s entire existence, no less, which ultimately doomed it? One of the most extraordinary things about the 1990 Ninja Turtles movie is that it was, essentially, an independent film. New Line would later become a powerhouse as a studio and created Lord of the Rings, but at the time, it was a mainly low rent operation, rather like Cannon films, known for the success of the slasher series “Nightmare on Elm Street.” So yes, I do believe "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" (1990) was a money laundering scheme by the Chinese Mafia.

The triads in Hong Kong, Macao, and Taiwan take enormous interest in financing martial arts movies for the same reason that they take a tremendous interest in financing porn movies: they’re quick, cheap, dirty, and can be used as a mechanism for laundering money, and a way to claim money from illegal sources (say, heroin) comes from a clean and legal source that can be claimed on taxes, like say, a movie studio. In addition, Hong Kong’s strict rating system, the Category III (equivalent to a far stricter R-rating) meant that very violent movies were handled in ways that were outside the law in ways similar to pornography. And according to several Senate investigations in 1991 ("Hearings on Asian Organized Crime"), the triads were actively involved in money laundering as well outside of Hong Kong, including currency trading and real estate, and the idea they could back a studio is entirely possible.

Everyone working in Hong Kong cinema has a story of dealing with the triads, who are interwoven into the city. Anita Mui's manager was was shot dead by mafiosos. Jimmy Wang Yu, the first Kung Fu star, was a suspected member of the Bamboo Union triad, and once borrowed money from one triad to pay another....and may have used his reported connections with the Triads to get Jackie Chan out of his initial contract with Golden Harvest, a favor Jackie repaid. Golden Harvest studios were actually firebombed in 1984, an event suspected to be due to Triad activity. Raymond Chow’s fellow producer and good friend who discovered Steven Chow, film producer Charles Heung, is well known to be the son of Heung Chin, who founded the Sun Yee On Triad, the largest in Hong Kong with over 25,000 members. And you don’t have to take my word for it; a US Senate Committee in 1991 on Asian Organized Crime identified Cheung as a leader of the Sun Yee On along with his brothers. Because of his association with Charles Heung and the Sun Yee On, Steven Chow, director of Kung Fu Hustle, cannot enter Canada legally.

Jackie Chan asserted Raymond Chow’s triad connections in his autobiography, and also claimed that he only hired triad members and other people who were mobbed up at Golden Harvest. One example would be producer Ng See Yuen, who produced Once Upon a Time in China for Golden Harvest, and who Jet Li refused to work with ever again after his manager was assassinated by triad gunmen (Jet Li blamed Ng See Yuen for his manager's death).

There's also Lo Wei, a Shaw Brothers director and known “Red Pole” enforcer of the Sun Yee On Triad, who came over to Golden Harvest, where he directed Bruce Lee’s Chinese Connection and Big Boss, and also directed Jackie Chan’s earliest “period” historical movies for GH. Jackie Chan, in his autobiography, stated that the reason he initially left Hong Kong to go to the United States for an American career was because Lo Wei, his director on Laughing Hyena, put a hit out on him for refusing to make Laughing Hyena 2, and Jackie had to flee the city when Lo Wei sent gunmen to his house to abduct him. When arriving in the United States, he had to avoid some men with machine guns at the airport. To this day, whenever possible, Jackie Chan goes out in public armed for fear of gangsters. 

Even Jackie Chan though, never made the assertion that Raymond Chow and the Sun Yee On had Bruce Lee killed. This is important to mention because if you talk to any Chinese person, nearly all of them believe with unshakable, absolute certainty that the Chinese Mafia killed Bruce Lee, which is literally the plot of Game of Death (which, incidentally, Raymond Chow produced). Everyone around Bruce was mobbed up, because everyone in the Hong Kong film industry was mobbed up; in fact, it’s an open question how much it existed for its own sake. It’s notable Bruce Lee died at the home of Betty Lo Ting Pei, Golden Harvest actress, and his known mistress…who was married to a triad gangster. It’s also known that the first person that Betty Lo Ting Pei called when Bruce died was not medical services but Raymond Chow, something that to this day, she has not attempted to explain. 

It can be hard to imagine what the motive is for Raymond Chow and the triads to kill Bruce Lee. After all, wouldn’t Bruce Lee be more useful to Raymond Chow alive than dead? I never saw the angle, here. But then, you consider that in the last few months of his life, Bruce Lee started to set the stage for his transition to behind the scenes roles like producer, and was assembling a lot of stunt talent around him (a lot of productions down the pipeline intended to have Bruce Lee in producer roles, like Circle of Iron). The rumor among the stunt players, as recounted by Sammo Hung, was that Bruce was attempting to form his own stunt and film production company (as Chiba later did successfully in Japan) and that would involve organizing and peeling off half the talent in Hong Kong….in a deeply triad controlled industry, no less. There was also a story recounted by witnesses that Bruce Lee, a temperamental and explosively violent man, physically assaulted Raymond Chow in his office with punches and kicks when he heard Chow had two sets of books in their shared production company, as Bruce was always keen to keep the triads out of his films. Ten days later, Bruce Lee was dead. And for weeks before his death, Lee told his friends "Hong Kong is getting too hot, I have to get out."

And you know something? A Ninja Turtles movie from 1990 is probably the least of it. In 2020, a few documents were declassified by the Taiwanese government that showed that the members of the Bamboo Union Triad had 19 top governmental positions in Taiwan from 1955-1984 (the era when Taiwan was in a complete state of military rule), including the National Security Bureau and all branches of the armed forces. In other words, Taiwan during the military rule era wasn't just corrupted by the triads, the triads were the government.

I never cease to be amazed at the incuriousness of the journalistic professions. Governments don't declassify documents - especially something as damning as triad involvement in government - unless they have to. So why would the Tsai Ing-Wen government reveal this now in 2020, especially when anti-corruption is the driving force of Taiwanese politics, and anti-corruption sentiment pushed the KMT out of power since the 90s? Outsiders believe that the single biggest question in Taiwanese politics is their relationship with the mainland. Kinda...the status quo is more or less a settled question. It's actually anti-corruption and anti-triad infiltration, which is why the DPP are the ruling party now.

The answer, I suspect, is that the triads are no longer working with the Taiwanese government, but with the mainland government. In the 1980s, Wong Man Fong, editor of the Xinhua paper of Hong Kong, said in several interviews he was asked by the People's Republic of China to reach out to the triads to help make a deal: no government interference in their activities, if they pledge to keep order in the city after the handover in 1997. I strongly suspect the mainland now has a similar arrangement with the Bamboo Union, Green Gang, and the Si Hai Bang they did in Hong Kong, especially since so much money is going back and forth with the release of trade to the mainland. In other words, the triads in Taiwan are active agents of the PRC.

Backdoor deals between government and the mob aren't out of the question, just ask the CIA, who used Giancana Crime Family assassins sent to kill Castro as a key plank of the Bay of Pigs Invasion, the role of the mafia in the Kennedy Assassination, or how control of opium was a key under-the-table reason for the invasion of Afghanistan.

What I suspect happened is, the Taipei government is turning on organized crime now after decades and decades of ludicrous and obvious corruption, because to the triads, the money to be made with the mainland and unification is far more lucrative. It's no coincidence that the largest pro-unification party in Taiwan is led by a triad gangster who spent time in jail for racketeering, Chang An Lo, nicknamed "the White Wolf." Like John Gotti, everyone knows he's a mobster and that's even part of the White Wolf's coolness and appeal (if you could vote for Tony "Scarface" Montana, boy, I bet a lot of guys would), but nobody can touch him. In fact, combined with how the "light world" financial institutions are intertwined along with the underworld, there's an argument to be made that the reason the PRC hasn't tried to take Taiwan is that for all intents and purposes, they already have it.

In other words, the triads have gone from using the Ninja Turtles to money launder to essentially setting global geopolitics.

[dianawinchester03]

Season 2, Episode 18 - Hollywood Babylon

Series Masterlist

Authors Note: The long awaited new episode is finally here! Once again, I’m so sorry for taking so long with this update (I’m still trying to kick dengue in the ass LOL) and thank you for your patience and understanding <3. Okayyyy, on with the story!

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Third Person POV

Los Angeles, California

The trio were currently on a tour guide bus, taking a tour around a Hollywood set. “First opened in 1927, the lot has been in continuous operation for eight decades” A tour guide said over a megaphone, rather enthusiastically as they drove around the set. Dean looked intrigued and excited as took in the surroundings.

Sitting next to Y/N, his arm draped over the back of her seat. “Hey, you know this is where they filmed Creepshow?” Dean leaned in to whisper in her ear. Y/N chuckled at Dean's enthusiasm, nodding frantically. Equally excited because she had a love for horror movies herself.

“And Scream. God, I love me some Billy Loomis” She swooned, licking on her vanilla ice cream cone. The set was bustling with activity. Actors and crew members were everywhere, rehearsing lines, setting up props, and adjusting lighting.

Sam sat in-front of Y/N and Dean in the tour bus, wearing a bored expression. He rolled his eyes at Dean's excitement and Y/N’s fangirling. “You guys are embarrassing.” He muttered under his breath, just loud enough for them to hear.

Dean chuckled at Sam's comment, nudging his brother's shoulder. "Oh, come on, Sammy. Live a little." He teased, his other arm around Y/N's shoulders, pulling her closer. Y/N stifled a laugh, knowing Sam wasn't as fond of all the movie chatter.

“Now, to the right here is Stars Hollow. It’s the setting for the television series Gilmore Girls” The tour guide stated over the megaphone. Sam visibly tensed up at the mention of Gilmore Girls, his eyes widening as Dean and Y/N looked over curiously. “Gilmore Girls?” Y/N muttered confused, Dean shrugged in return, having no clue about the show either.

Sam, however, seemed to know about the show, the sheer panic evident on his face. “And if we’re lucky? We might even catch one of the show's stars” The tour guide said over the megaphone. Sam turned to Dean and Y/N, Dean offering his brother an enthusiastic thumbs up. “Come on” Sam grunted, quickly rushing out of the bus.

Dean and Y/N’s faces dropped, “What?!” Y/N exclaimed through a mouth plastered with ice cream. “Let’s finish the tour!” Dean huffed. But Sam seemed serious on leaving the tour, the two rolled their eyes as the guide said, “And then to the right, here we have New York Avenue, and that’s where they shot Lois and Clark”

Y/N groaned as they exited the tour bus, catching up to Sam who was walking briskly to the car. She couldn’t believe he was making them leave mid-tour. “Seriously?” She grumbled, licking at her ice cream cone again.

Dean was clearly annoyed, huffing as he shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. “I mean, come on, Sammy. It was getting interesting.” He looked back at the tour bus with longing.

Dean’s eyes flickered to Y/N, who’s mouth was still messed up with the melted ice cream. He snickered at the way she looked like a toddler, defiantly licking away at the cone, annoyed with Sam for wanting to leave the tour. The trio now strolling around the Hollywood lot.

Y/N continued to lick at her ice cream cone, trying to salvage it. She shot a glare at Sam’s back, annoyed that he had cut the tour short because of some TV show. Dean chuckled beside her as he reached into his jacket pocket, taking out a handkerchief to wipe a bit of ice cream from her chin.

“You’re a mess, sweetheart,” Dean said affectionately, gently wiping the ice cream off her chin with the handkerchief. He shot a sly glance at Sam, who was walking ahead of them, still rattled by the mention of Gilmore Girls.

Y/N let out a soft huff, still annoyed at Sam for cutting the tour short. She looked up at Dean and couldn’t help but pout a little. “Stupid Sam and his stupid Gilmore Girls phobia...” she mumbled, as Dean wiped away the ice-cream from her mouth.

Dean chuckled at Y/N’s pouty expression and her comment about Sam’s aversion to Gilmore Girls while Y/N was trying to ignore the excessive pace her heart was beating. He tucked the handkerchief back into his jacket pocket as they continued to walk around the set.

Leaving the tour bus didn’t spoil their excitement however, Dean and Y/N were still scanning the set with wide smiles as Sam looked bored, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

“Hey, fellas. Check it out. It’s Matt Damon” Y/N pointed to a man who looked like Matt Damon. Dean’s mouth fell open as they continued walking. Sam snorted in amusement, “I’m pretty sure that’s not Matt Damon” Sam snickered. “No, it is” Dean insisted. “Well, Matt Damon just picked up a broom and started sweeping” Sam sassed, Y/N rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, he was probably researching a role or something” She shrugged. “Uhh…I don’t think so” Sam shook his head. “Hey, this way. Uh, I think Stage 9’s over here” Sam gestured to the entrance of stage 9. Y/N felt a familiar chill raise at the back of her neck, clearing her throat abruptly at the feeling.

“Come on, man. Let’s keep going this way” Dean groaned, pointing in the opposite direction. “Dude. No, come on, we gotta work” Y/N’s tone instantly went serious, grabbing Dean’s hand to pull him over to Stage 9. Dean groaned childishly. “Dude, you guys wanted to come to L.A.” Sam retorted. “Yeah, for vacation! I mean, swimming pools and movie stars. Not to work!” Dean exclaimed.

Y/N rolled her eyes at the brother’s bickering. She knew how stubborn the two could be, especially when it came to hunting.

“Does this feel like swimming pool weather to you, Dean?!” Sam shot back as they bent the corner. “I mean, it’s practically Canadian” He snorted. “Yeah, I know. I just figured after everything that happened with…Madison. We could use a little R&R. That’s all. You know?” Dean defended.

Sam sighed heavily, rolling his eyes again as the twinge of pain in his chest rose again. “Did you hear from Jo?” Y/N asked Sam curiously. Y/N’s question broke the tension for a brief moment, and Sam’s face lit up at the mention of the blonde-haired huntress.

“Actually, yeah” He answered a little reluctantly, shoving his hands into his pockets. Y/N’s eyes widened, waiting for his answer. “And?” She urged, wanting the information.

“She’s a couple towns over tracking something” Sam answered, clearing his throat. He refused to make eye contact with both Y/N and Dean, keeping his gaze focused on the crowd of people walking by them. “She say if she’s gonna meet up with us soon?” Y/N asked, missing her friend.

“She didn’t say” Sam answered, his voice coming out slightly harsh. He was worried about Jo, she was a good friend. A good hunter. But he knew how dangerous hunting could be. Sam didn’t want her to get hurt.

After everything that happened with Madison, the thought of his girl out there hunting on her own tugged at his heart. He hated himself for getting closer to her, for getting attached. God knows he wished he wasn’t so knee deep into his attachment to her. He was trying to force himself to pull away, selfishly not wanting to get hurt but also, praying that Jo wouldn’t hunt.

But he knew her well enough to know, she wouldn’t listen to him, not that she had to. He was torn between wanting to keep her safe, and knowing that she was her own person, she had her own life. And he had no control over what she did. He could only hope she’s safe, but deep down he couldn’t shake the feeling that she might be in over her head.

Dean and Y/N picked up immediately on Sam’s dreadful tone, sharing a look as the younger Winchester seemed lost in thought. “Look, I just wanna work. It keeps my mind off things.” Sam finally said after a few moments of silence. “Okay, okay, alright” Dean sighed, gently placing his arm around Y/N’s wrist to move her from the end of the sidewalk to the inner part as they continued walking through the set.

“So this crew guy, what did he—?” Y/N asked crunching on the last of her cone, changing the subject as she tossed her napkin into a bin. “He died on set?” She asked, wiping her mouth with her sleeve. “Yeah, rumors are spreading like wildfire online. They’re saying the sets are haunted.” Sam stated.

A smirk raised on Dean’s face as his eyes flickered over to Y/N, “Yes, I got that ‘ESP’ feeling, Dean” Y/N scoffed, rolling her eyes before he could ask, already knowing he was gonna mock her. Dean’s smirk widened as Y/N rolled her eyes.

“I wasn’t gonna say that!” He grinned, feigning offense as he dramatically put his hand to his chest. Sam snorted at the interaction before turning to Y/N, a concerned look on his face. “So you really sense something?” Y/N nodded in return. “What, like Poltergeist?” Dean asked.

“Could be a poltergeist” Y/N responded, with a shrug. “No, no, no. The movie ‘Poltergeist’ ” Dean shook his head, Y/N’s mouth formed an ‘o’, now understanding what he was referencing, “Yeah, I guess” She snorted, shaking her head, while Sam looked confused, his brows furrowed. “Huh?” Sam mumbled.

Dean and Y/N shot the younger Winchester a nasty side eye. “You know nothing of your cultural heritage, do you?” Y/N said In disappointment when Sam just shrugged. “It was rumored that the set of Poltergeist was cursed. That they used real human bones as, uh, props” Dean explained the lore as they continued to walk through the set.

“Like, at least three of the actors died in it” Y/N added, Sam tilted his head as he listened. “Yeah, it might be something like that” Sam nodded as Dean's eyes wandered, taking in the surroundings of the set, until they landed on a cute perky blonde-haired woman, strutting by.

His gaze lingered on her for a bit, a subtle grin forming on his face. He wasn’t one to miss an opportunity when he saw an attractive woman, especially a blonde. “Hey, check out the talent” Dean smirked, nudging Sam and nodding in the direction of the blonde woman. Sam rolled his eyes, clearly not impressed. Y/N shot Dean a look, silently warning him not to flirt.

She felt that burning feeling in her chest again. Before reaching up to swat him at the back of his head, “Focus!” She reprimanded him, pointing a firm finger at the elder Winchester. “Ow!” Dean exclaimed, rubbing his head where Y/N had swatted him. He grumbled slightly under his breath, but he chuckled a bit.

He looked back over at the blonde, who seemed to have noticed his attention and smiled at him. He smiled back, and was about to approach her when Y/N yanked on his sleeve.

“Dean! We’re working!” Y/N hissed, giving his sleeve a tug. She shook her head at his behavior, annoyed with his inability to focus on the task at hand. Dean rolled his eyes playfully at Y/N’s scolding. “Hey, I’m just looking!” He defended, his eyes still shamelessly wandering over the blonde.

Sam watched the interaction between the two with an amused smirk. “Keep it in your pants, man” He teased, causing Y/N to laugh softly. “Anyways!” Y/N exclaimed, tugging Dean along, who was still trying to get out of her grasps. “So, this crew guy, what’s his name?” Y/N asked Sam. “Frank Jaffy” He responded.

“You got a death certificate or a coroner's report or anything” Dean asked after finally giving up on running away. “Well, no, but, uh, it’s L.A, you know? Might not even be his real name” Sam sighed as Y/N let go of Dean’s wrist, he winced slightly at the loss of contact but swallowed it down. “Fuck, you’ve got a point” Y/N cursed.

“But the girl who found him said she saw something. A vanishing figure” Sam informed them, placing up a finger before shoving his hands back into his pockets. “What’s the girl's name?” Dean asked. “Uh…Tara Benchley” Sam answered. Y/N’s jaw dropped as both her and Dean paused in their tracks. “Woah, woah, woah! Tara Benchley?!” Dean exclaimed.

Sam looked confused again, his brows furrowed, “From Fear.com and Ghost Ship Tara Benchley?!” Y/N exclaimed. Sam's confusion morphed into realization when Y/N and Dean said Tara Benchley's name with such excitement. He didn't know much about pop cultural references, but he assumed Tara Benchley was well-known for horror movies.

“I guess so” He shrugged, still not fully comprehending their excitement. “Dude, why didn’t you say so?” Dean chuckled, a grin widening on his face. “What? So now you’re suddenly on board?” Sam snorted, shaking his head. Dean rolled his eyes, “I just- I mean, I’m a fan of her work. It’s very good” He cleared his throat, trying to hide his obvious starstruck expression.

Y/N didn’t bother to hide hers, smacking Sam on his arm. “She’s smoking, dude” She swooned, fanning herself. Dean tried to play it cool, but his excitement was evident in his voice. "Her horror movies are great. She’s an amazing actress” He added, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Y/N nodded in agreement, still fanning herself. “And smoking hot” She confirmed, her grin widening. Sam could only roll his eyes at their behavior, amused by their fangirling over the famous actress. They ended up wandering onto the set of the movie as one of the snooty producers, Brad, was rambling on with the directors, McG and Jay.

Brad’s eyes scanned the set, they landed on Y/N, assuming she was a Production Assistant (PA) “Uh, excuse, uh, leather jacket girl!” Brad called out, waving Y/N over. Y/N’s eyebrows rose in surprise at being addressed, but she exchanged a confused glance with the brothers pointing to herself in confusion.

“Yeah, you gorgeous. Come here” He ushered her over with a crooked finger, while munching on nuts. “Yes?” She asked as she approached him, trying to sound composed. “Could you get me uh, a smoothie from Craft?” He asked her, “You want a what from who?” She asked confused as Dean approached besides her.

“You two are PAs. This is what you do” Brad scoffed arrogantly as Sam quickly ran up to them, placing his hands on their shoulders. “Yeah, yeah. They, uh..one smoothie coming right up” Sam chuckled awkwardly, giving Brad a thumbs up before ushering them away. “What’s a PA?” Dean and Y/N asked Sam in unison.

“I think they’re kinda like slaves” Sam mused as they walked away. Sam turned and gave Brad another thumbs up while the producer checked Y/N out shamelessly. “They’ll let anyone into this business, huh?” Brad snorted.

Sam’s sarcastic remark about PAs being like slaves echoed in Y/N and Dean’s ears as they followed him away from the set. They were both baffled by the whole interaction and the producer’s entitled attitude.

As they sneaked away, Y/N glanced back at Brad, who was ogling her shamelessly. She felt a wave of disgust wash over her as she stuck her middle finger up at him discreetly.

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A little later, Dean and Y/N adjusted into their covers as PA’s, now each carrying around trays of smoothies. “I hate this” Y/N grumbled. “Agreed. This is so humiliating” Dean agreed with a nod, his voice laced with annoyance as he grimaced at the smoothies in his hands. Some actors and staff took some of the smoothies off the trays without a ‘thank you’ as the actors and staff chattered indistinctively within themselves.

Dean’s eyes went up to the catwalk, judging Y/N lightly: “That’s where he was found” He whispered. She nodded lightly before they both rested their trays on one of the snack tables. They quietly snuck up the stairs as the lights went off, indicating they were gonna start shooting. Dean kept his EMF meter handy, just in case as they creeped up the dark staircase.

The set fell into a soft darkness as the lights went out, signaling the start of the shooting. Dean and Y/N silently creeped up the dark staircase, the elder Winchester holding the EMF meter in his hand, just in case.

They reached the top, trying to be as quiet as possible to not draw any attention. Y/N glanced at the spot where the body was supposedly found, her stomach twisting into knots.

Y/N gently placed her hand on the spot where the body was found. Her fingertips gently brushed against the cold, hard surface as she closed her eyes and focused on any kind of energy, hoping to get a reading or some kind of vision.

Dean hovered closely behind Y/N, his breath tickling the back of her neck, as he quietly whispered, "Got anything? Anything at all?" He studied her expression as she continued to concentrate, hoping for any sign of a reaction.

“Yeah, the fact that you had too many cheesesteaks” Y/N grumbled, trying to ignore the quickening of her heartbeat in her chest as the cheesesteaks they had from his breath wafted from her ear to her nose. “Hey, don’t blame the cheesesteaks” Dean retorted defensively, rolling his eyes at her comment.

His hot breath fanned across her ear and caused her heart to quicken, not that he knew. He was used to standing close to her like this so he thought nothing of the effect it had on her.

Y/N forced herself to focus on the task at hand, pushing her crude thoughts about Dean’s close proximity to the back of her mind. She got up and began to press her hands all over the catwalk, trying to detect any lingering energy but nothing came. Shaking her head, “Nothing” She sighed, her shoulders slumping in defeat.

Dean watched as Y/N searched, hoping she would find some clue. But when she came up empty, he let out a frustrated sigh. "Fuck" He muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair in irritation. "Try the EMF, maybe I missed something” Y/N suggested.

"Good idea" Dean nodded, pulling out the EMF meter. He scanned it over the catwalk in case there was something they missed. The EMF was silent no matter where he pointed it, making his frown deepen in annoyance. "Nothing" He muttered, shoving the meter back in his pocket.

____________________________________________

The bell rang, indicating shooting was over. Dean and Y/N we’re back on ground level, eating cheesesteaks once again. “So??” Sam asked hopefully, approaching the snack table where Dean and Y/N were hounding currently, snout deep in the miniature sandwiches. “No EMF anywhere” Dean told him, “No feelings either” Y/N added through a mouth full of food.

“Great, so what do you think?” Sam grumbled disappointed, Dean shrugged, “Well, I think being a PA sucks. But..the food these people get. Are you kidding me? Look at these things” Dean whispered, picking up two more cheesesteaks, handing one to Y/N. The female hunter nodded in agreement.

Dean's eyes lit up, “They’re like miniature Philly cheese steak sandwiches. They’re delicious” Y/N moaned as she bit into the sandwich along with Dean. Y/N then picked up one, handing it to Sam but he shook his head, rolling his eyes at the duo. “Maybe later” He grimaced.

Dean and Y/N shared a look before shrugging. She handed it to Dean, who immediately shoved it into his mouth, munching on it after finishing his other sandwich. “What did you find out about the dead crew guy?” Dean asked Sam through a mouth full of food, a piece of the steaks hanging out the side of his mouth.

Sam raised his brows at the way they were savagely demolishing the stack of sandwiches before clearing his throat, “Uh, Frank Jaffy was just filling in for the day. Nobody here knew him or where he lived, or anything” Sam explained. “Oh, great. So you found out as much as we did” Y/N scoffed, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

“Not quite, I-” Sam went to say but Walter, one of the crew guys, reached between them to grab a cheesesteak. “Hey, guys” Walter greeted them. “Hey” The Winchesters greeted back in unison. “They’re wonderful!” Y/N smiled at Walter as he walked off. He gave her a thumbs up in return. “Listen, I did dig up some stuff about Stage 9’s history.” Sam began.

“Yeah?” Dean and Y/N mumbled in unison. “Yeah. Four people died messy here over the past 80 years ago. Two suicides and two fatal accidents” Sam said. “Any one of those could be a vengeful spirit” Dean mumbled. “Yeah. Just gotta narrow it down more” Sam sighed. “God I hate vengeful spirits” Y/N groaned, annoyed.

Rightfully so, since every encounter they’ve had with vengeful spirits drained her energy completely, due to their aggressive nature and aura.

Dean’s expression softened, “You know, if you want, you can sit this one out. Me and Sam can handle it” Dean said gently but Y/N shook her head. “Nah, it’s fine. I’m a big girl” She joked, nodding as she chewed on the cheesesteak.

Whilst mid chew, y/n’s eyes flickered over to Tara Benchley, a small sly smile appearing on her face. “I’ll get right on narrowing it down” Y/N muttered, wiping her mouth before stuffing her half finished sandwich into Dean’s hand. “Son of a-” Dean groaned as Y/N made her way over to Tara, snatching a script from one of the other PA’s hands.

Dean watched Y/N walk away, grumbling under his breath when she stuffed her half-finished sandwich into his hands. Sam snorted in amusement as Dean tossed the sandwich into the bin, dusting his hands off as his eyes narrowed in Y/N’s direction. “Are you supposed to get one of these?” Y/N timidly asked Tara, handing her the script with a starstruck smile on her face.

Dean clenched his jaw as Tara’s eyes roamed Y/N, a coy smile appearing on the actress’ face. That familiar burning feel returned as his nostrils flared. He schooled the act but his little brother caught onto his expressions quickly. “Oh lord, here we go” Sam muttered to himself as his brother quickly took up a smoothie from the table, stalking over to them.

“Sorry about that, it’s her first day” Dean smiled widely at Tara, handing her the smoothie. His charm radiated as he smirked at the actress. “Thanks” Tara giggled, accepting the smoothie from Dean. Y/N clenched her jaw, shooting subtle daggers at him before clearing her throat.

“You know, I know it’s really uncool to say this, but we’re big fans” Y/N said sweetly, Dean nodded enthusiastically, “Oh, God. What a terrible script” Tara snorted, “Uh, but thank you” She added, winking at Y/N. This made the hunter blush and Dean internally roll his eyes. “Yeah…” Dean chuckled.

“You found him right…the dead guy?” Dean asked awkwardly, Y/N’s eyes slightly widened as Tara’s smile dropped. She shot him a look that said, ‘Way to be subtle, hotshot’. with a gentle elbow to his ribs.

Sam rolled his eyes from afar as he watched the exchange, shaking his head at Dean's less than subtle approach to questioning Tara. Sam shot him a disapproving glare, knowing that they needed to be more tactful in their questioning. Dean winced at the nudge to his ribs, shooting Y/N a subtle glare in return.

“He’s sorry hun, you probably don’t even want to talk about this” She quickly apologized on Dean’s behalf, “No, actually it’s-…it’s okay, but nobody around here really brings it up very much” Tara assured him before whispering. “I think they’re all scared that I’m gonna have some sort of breakdown” The hunters nodded in understanding.

“That must’ve been awful” Y/N said sympathetically, Tara gave her a grateful smile. “What happened?” Dean asked gently. “It was horrible” Tara sighed, biting her lip as she reminisced on the terrible experience. “There- there was all this blood coming from his eyes…and from his mouth, and, uh…I saw this…um..” Tara’s voice was low as she explained, an unconvincing smile on her face.

“What?” Y/N asked curiously, “I saw this shape” She whispered back, Dean and Y/N’s brows cocked up. “To tell you guys the truth, I don’t know, actually what I saw, I just know I saw it” She explained as Walter approached them with a juice. “Here you go, Tara,” He said sweetly, handing Tara the juice and a bag of chips.

Y/N glanced at Dean, her eyes wide with interest and confusion as Tara spoke of the "shape" she saw. It piqued her curiosity as to what it could have been, and it clearly piqued Dean's as well, judging by the raising of his eyebrows. Walter approaching them interrupted their thoughts as he handed Tara a juice and a bag of chips.

“Thanks, Walter,” Tara said gratefully, accepting it before the PA left. “Uh, so this crew guy, Frank. I mean, did you know him?” Dean asked curiously. “Uh, no. Not that well.” Tara shook her head, opening the bag of chips. “It’s funny. It’s like no one around here knew the guy” Y/N said, shaking her head. “I’ve got his picture,” Tara told them.

The starstruck smiles reappeared on the hunters faces as Tara turned to fetch her folder from her bag. “You do?” Dean grinned. “Yeah, I take Polaroids of all the crew. It’s just one of those things you do to kill time on set” Tara blushed shyly, flipping through her folder as the two hunters smiled, eyes shining with excitement. “Um…right here”

Dean and Y/N moved to either side of her chair to get a better look. As Y/N scanned the picture, a sudden realization slapped her in the face. That familiar face looking back at her. Her jaw dropped, mirroring Dean's expression. They shared a look before muttering expletives in unison.

"Son of a fucking bitch"

"Jesus fucking Christ"

____________________________________________

The trio were now knocking on the door to the apartment of the man who was thought to be Frank Jaffy, “Gerard St. James?” Y/N questioned as Gerard opened the door. “Yes?” He raised an inquisitive brow at the three as Sam and Dean narrowed their eyes at him. “You’re still alive” Sam scoffed, “And you’re not Frank Jaffy” Dean added.

“Uh..no..” Gerard shook his head. “You were Desert Soldier #4 in Metalstorm: Destruction of Jared-Syn?” Y/N asked in a knowing tone, trying to keep her fangirl side at bay. “I was,” Gerard nodded. “I knew we recognized you” Dean chuckled, “We are huge fans. I mean your turn as a tractor-crash victim in Critters 3”

“Critters 3!” Gerard chuckled along with Dean as Y/N nodded enthusiastically. “Wow” She fanned herself again as Sam looked between the three, "And in Critters 4," Y/N added, her smirk growing wider as Gerard chuckled along. She was practically swooning as she fanned herself, her excitement palpable. Sam rolled his eyes at the trio, shaking his head at their fangirl behavior.

“Alright, well please. Come in” Gerard ushered them into his apartment. “Oh, cool” Dean muttered, gesturing for Y/N to go in first. As Y/N eagerly entered the room, Dean gestured for her to go first, his eyes quickly darting to her ass before he followed after her. Sam entered last, shutting the door behind them.

-

The walls were lined with pictures of Gerard in various roles, the trio now questioning him. “Yeah, it was the producers. I mean, they brought me in to play Frank for the day” Gerard explained, handing Sam and Y/N two coffee mugs. “Just to fake your death?” Dean asked, accepting a mug of coffee from Frank as he settled on the couch next to Y/N.

“Well, rumors of a haunted film set. Free publicity. Especially when you’re making a horror movie” Gerard explained as Sam sat across from Dean and y/n and Gerard settled next to Sam. “I mean, uh, it’s already all over the internet” He added, “Yeah, we know” Sam muttered, smiling tightly. “Well, these days, it’s all about new media. Building buzz” Gerard chuckled.

“They say that I’m the new Lonelygirl” The actor smiled proudly as Sam awkwardly sipped his coffee. “Who?” Dean and Y/N asked simultaneously, both confused. “And the ghost Tara saw?” Sam asked, “Projected on a screen of diffusion” Gerard explained, a lump grew in Y/N’s throat as he said this.

“Isn’t that kind of cruel? Messing with their heads like that?” She gaped, shaking her head in disgust at the fact that they would do that to one of her favorite actresses. “Hey, I just play the part, dollface. I don’t write the script” Gerard defended, y/n clenched her jaw as Frank continued to talk.

Y/N clenched her jaw at Gerard's words, growing increasingly frustrated with the fact that they were messing with the heads of innocent people just for publicity. She felt a protective anger towards the actress, Tara.

Dean, sensing her discomfort, placed a comforting hand on her thigh, giving it a slight squeeze. He shared her disapproval of their tactics, but knew they had a job to do, regardless.

“Speaking of, I’m playing Willy in a dinner-theater production of Salesman at Costa Mesa all next month” Gerard stated excitedly, taking up a couple coupons he had on the coffee table after resting down his own mug. “You get a free pepper steak with the coupon.” He said as he handed Dean the coupon.

The Hunter placed his mug on the table, using his free hand to take the coupon whilst the other was still rubbing gentle circles on Y/N’s thigh. A subtle shiver ran through Y/N’s body, a response to his unexpected and surprisingly comforting touch. She glanced down at his hand, then back up at him.

For a brief moment, she considered gently removing his hand, but a part of her went against it. Relishing in the comfort his touch brought to her, something she wasn’t used to much.

“Huh. Well now, wait a second. If you’re seen in public, won’t that ruin the hoax?” Y/N asked gruffly, clearing her throat, attempting to pretend like she wasn’t trying not to jump Dean right at this very moment. “Ha. Please” Gerard chuckled, shaking his head. “Frank and Willy, totally different characters” He assured them, turning to Sam.

Y/N forced a grunt, trying to keep her mind off of the warmth and comfort of Dean's hand, and refocusing on the conversation at hand. She shifted slightly, feeling more flustered as the actor explained the difference between 'Frank and Willy'.

Sam and Dean shared a look, both silently agreeing that this man before them was a complete jackass. “You know what?” Sam spoke up, playing his mug on the table, forcing a tight smile. “Thanks very much, Mr. St. James. it was just nagging at us, you know? But we’re very glad that, you know, you’re alive and well” Sam stated politely, pushing himself up from the couch.

Dean finally took his hand of y/n’s thigh, the female hunter placing her mug on the table also, letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding in. “Yeah” Gerard smiled widely, shaking each of their hands. “Absolutely” Y/N forced a smile. A thought crossed Dean’s mind, “Hey, uh, I wanted to ask you, what was it like working with Richard Molt” He asked.

Sam furrowed his brows in disapproval and confusion as Y/N’s face brightened, intrigued. “Metalstorm. He was Hurok, king of the Cyclops people” Y/N explained, slightly excited as Sam rolled his eyes at the duo for the umpteenth time. The two turned to Gerard expectantly.

“Gentleman’s gentleman. And a bit of a womanizer” Gerard chuckled, “Yeah?” Y/N smiled widely as both she and Dean chuckled. Y/N's eyes widened with joy as the topic changed to one of her favorites. She felt a little star-struck as Gerard spoke of the actor, Richard Molt.

As he began speaking of his experience with the actor, both her and Dean chuckled and smiled. Sam just shook his head at her, unable to believe that she could still be gushing over this man after all these years.

____________________________________________

It was now the next day, Dean and Y/N both had headsets attached to their ears as they both stayed undercover in the roles as PAs, both liking it a bit too much. The previous day, Brad, the studio guy. “Hung himself” in the middle of shooting, the trio wasn’t convinced so they all stuck around to get a gist of everything.

Everyone on set was currently arguing in the middle of shooting, about whether ghosts would be “afraid of salt or shotguns”. Dean and Y/N snickered to themselves at the irony as Walter, a PA brushed past them, “These people are idiots” He grumbled annoyed, tossing his script to the ground. Dean and Y/N shared a look, both munching on taquitos as Sam approached them.

“Walter’s a little testy for a PA, huh?” Dean commented, Y/N nodded her head, taking another bite of her taquito. She looked over at Walter, who still had a sour look on his face, pacing back and forth through the commotion.

"I would be too,” She agreed. “But the food” She groaned slightly, throwing her head back as she took another bite of the taquito. Sam let out a chuckle, "How’s it going here?” He asked the duo in a low tone. “It’s going really good man. Tara’s really stepped up her performance” Dean said with admiration, Y/N had to hold herself back from rolling her eyes but schooled the act.

She nodded in agreement, “I think it’s probably all the sense memory she’s drawing on” Y/N added. “Sense memory?” Sam questioned, raising his brows at the two as they nodded. “Yeah,” Dean replied, crunching on the food. “Dean, Y/N/N, when I asked how it's going here, I’m talking about the case, right? We don’t really work here” Sam snorted, making their faces drop.

They swallowed harshly as he spoke, “You know, I thought you guys hated being PAs” Sam shook his head as they looked down at their attire. Both hunters were dressed as typical production assistants, their outfits blending in with the rest of the crew members.

Dean donned a black t-shirt, which was partially hidden by a green button down shirt. He wore faded blue jeans that were slightly stressed and his attire was topped off by brown work boots.

Y/N was dressed in dark gray jeans, light brown combat boots, and a black tank top hiding underneath a dark green button-down shirt, contrasting Dean’s outfit perfectly.

Dean and Y/N both looked down at their outfits in defeat. They looked back up at Sam, they both shrugged as Dean cleared his throat, "Well, uh, it’s just we..." He stopped, knowing he was digging themselves a hole. “I don’t know. It’s not so bad, feeling kind of like part of the team, you know?” Y/N added as De/‘ nodded in agreement.

“It’s good.” He agreed, “Oh, taquito? They’re wonderful” Y/N offered Sam a taquito as Dean crunched on his own. The younger Winchester grimaced, shaking his head, “No, um, listen, I conned my way into the morgue.” Sam began. “And?” Dean mumbled through a mouth full of food.

“News reports are right. Brad's doornail, no question” Sam informed them, but they two didn’t hear a word he said as someone was speaking to them through the headsets. “Copy that” Dean responded, “Coming right up sir” Y/N replied before covering the mic along with Dean.

“Sorry, what?” Dean asked Sam, “Copy that?” Sam muttered confused. “What did you say?” Y/N asked. Sam’s face dropped as he looked between the duo, rolling his eyes. He leaned forward, speaking low for only them to hear, "I said, the news reports are right. Brad’s a doornail."

"They’re aware!” Dean said loudly into the mic, still not hearing a word Sam said. “Who’s aware?” Sam asked, furrowing his brows. The two undercover PAs shared a confused look before looking at Sam. Y/N furrowed her brows slightly, “What are you talking about?”

“Sorry, what were you saying?” Dean asked, wiping his mouth. Sam pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a frustrated exhale. “The newspaper’s right. Brad's a doornail, no question about it.” He stated slowly, hoping they’d hear what he was saying finally. “I guess it’s a good thing we didn’t skip town” Dean said, nodding.

“Oh, come here. I want you to hear something” Y/N told the brothers, “Copy that. On my way!” She said into the mic again, Sam and Dean looked at her confused, following behind her as she made her way to Dave, one of videographers who seemed to have a liking to her. “Hey, Dave, can you play that thing you were playing for me earlier?” She said sweetly.

Dave smiled widely at Y/N, “You liked that, huh?” He teased, his face slightly flush. Y/N smiled back at him, giving him a gentle nudge as both brothers stood behind her, watching the interaction. “I sure did, I’m intrigued, play it for my friends here, would ya?” She asked, her voice slightly low and sultry in an attempt to flatter Dave.

Dean clenched his jaw tightly, his freehand balling into tight fists by his side. He swallowed his food gruffly as he watched Y/N flirt with Dave, his eyes flickering between the two as he kept a disinterested expression on his face.

His stomach twisted with irritation. Tearing his eyes away from them as Dave handed him a pair of headphones and then handed Sam one. “Thanks” Sam muttered as they both accepted the headphones, placing it on their heads.

“Doesn’t matter, we’re not leaving till we—” Mitch, one of the actors, voice came over the headphones before the audio began crackling and a static noise came through. The boys and y/n shared a knowing look.

-

“EVP” Sam stated as they walked through the set. “After Brad’s stage dive. And all of a sudden, my head's spinning like crazy and I’m sensing the spirits” Y/N said, “Yeah, I’m getting electromagnetic readings up the wazoo” Dean agreed, “For some reason it’s a legit haunting now” He added.

“Who’s the ghost, guys? What’s it want?” Sam sighed. The boys simultaneously looked at y/n, “Don't look at me, I just feel the damn things. I don’t see em unless we do a seance, and to do a seance, we have to know who the hell the ghosts are” Y/N put her hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry, ghosts? As in plural” Dean furrowed his brows.

“Mhm. There’s more than one” Y/N nodded, “Great” Sam muttered sarcastically, “I think we should take a look at Brad's death scene” Dean suggested.

-

The trio were now outside, making sure no one noticed Sam picking the lock to Tara’s trailer. Dean knelt in front of the DVD, putting out his hand for y/n to hand him the CD. “Hey. Where’d you get this DVD?” Sam asked them as they sat back, rewinding the tape. “They’re called dailies” Dean corrected.

“I got it from Cindy, she’s kinda got this on and off thing going with Drew. He dubbed me an extra copy” Y/N explained, Sam tilted his head, somewhat impressed. “Here’s where the guy fell through the roof.” Dean paused the tape. “Right,” Sam said. “Here we go” Y/N muttered as he unpaused the tape.

“They must have super hearing” Mitch said through the TV, then an ear piercing scream came from Cindy as Brad’s body came falling from the ceiling, his neck around a noose, hanging mid air.

“Hey, wait, go back, go back” Sam suddenly said, Dean quickly rewinded the tape. “Right after. Right. Yeah, right” Both Sam and Y/N’s eyes widened as the figure of a woman appeared on the screen, “There” He gasped as Dean's brows furrowed. “It’s like Three Men and a Baby all over again” Dean muttered. Sam turned to them confused.

“Selleck, Dandon and Guttenberg. And I don’t know who played the baby” Dean tilted his head. “What’s your point?” Sam asked. “There’s a scene in the movie where people say that the camera caught a ghost on film. Apparently in the background of one of the scenes, there was this boy that nobody remembers from set. Spirit photography” Y/N explained.

Sam narrowed his eyes at the image of the woman, “I’ve seen her before” He said in a low tone.

____________________________________________

Later, they were all sitting in the cafeteria. Sam was doing research on his computer while Dean and Y/N fiddled with this equipment. “Here, check this out,” Sam told them, turning the laptop towards them. “Got your ears on? Over.” A man on their headsets asked. “Yeah, go for Ozzy” Dean responded. “Joan, here” Y/N responded back. “You guys got eyes on Tara” The man asked as Sam furrowed his brows at them.

“No. I don’t have a 20 on Tara” Dean said. “I think she’s 10-100” Y/N added with a small smile along with Dean as Sam rolled his eyes. “Copy that. Send her my way” The man said. “Okay, copy that” Dean and Y/N stated in unison, before the line went dead. “Sorry, what were you saying?” Y/N asked Sam. He just shook his head and pointed to the screen.

“Elise Drummond. Starlet back in the 30s. Had an affair with a studio exec” Sam explained in a low tone to ensure no one else heard them. Elise was the same woman they saw in the footage, “He uses her up, fires her, leaves her destitute. So Elise hangs herself from Stage 9s rafters right into a scene they’re shooting”

“Just like our man Brad” Dean muttered as he and Y/N stared at the picture. “So, what? She’s got it in for the studio brass?” Y/N questioned. “Possibly. I mean, it’s a motive, and Brad's death matches hers exactly.” Sam shrugged. “We’re digging tonight, aren’t we?” Dean groaned.

-

It was now nightfall, the trio found themselves in the cemetery where Elise was buried. “Which way?” Y/N asked as they shone their lights through the dark foggy grave garden. “Uh, over here” Dean answered, leading the way, using a map he bought. “Hey.” Dean called out to them. “Yeah” Sam and Y/N said in unison. “Ha, this map is totally worth the five bucks,” Dean chuckled.

Earning eyerolls from both younger hunters, “Hey, we gotta go check out Johnny Ramones grave when we’re done here” Dean suggested enthusiastically. “You wanna dig him up too” Y/N teased, nudging him with a small smile. “Bite your tongue, heathen!” He playfully shot back, causing Y/N to cackle.

“Guys, what I don’t get is, why now? I mean, after 75 years, Elise Drummond suddenly goes homicidal, you know. Why this movie? And how is she the only spirit that shows but Y/N felt multiple entities?” Sam questioned. “Well, maybe she’s mad they’re making a scary ghost flick” Dean suggested. “True. We could always deal with the other ghost after” Y/N agreed as they approached the grave.

“Here we go” She muttered, dropping the duffel bag, “Yep.” Sam sighed as they all got to work on digging.

-

After digging for a while, Dean finally hit her coffin. Y/N then handed him her butterfly knife to pry open the coffin. The old wood creaked open, revealing the skeletal remains of Elise. Sam immediately went to work on salting the bones as Dean climbed out. The elder Winchester took the initiative to douse the corpse with light fluid as Y/N got a box of matches out.

She struck the match against the side of the box, the flame igniting before tossing it into the coffin. Elise’s corpse was now in flames, the three watching as the corpse burnt.

____________________________________________

The next morning, cops were swarming the set. Apparently another one of the producers died horribly. “Run in with a giant fan.” Sam scoffed. “Same thing happened to an electrician back in ‘66. Guy named Billy Beard” Sam sighed as they took in the scene, blood was splattered almost everywhere. “What the hell, fellas?” Y/N groaned.

“I don’t know. At least we know it isn’t Elise this time. Doesn’t seem like her M.O.” Sam responded. “So she’s not the only homicidal ghost, great” Y/N groaned. “Yeah, but these things don’t usually tag team” Dean pointed out as they all walked outside to hear the director, McG, giving a speech.

“In light of Jay’s accident last night and in cooperation with the authorities. We’re shutting down production for a few days” McG announced, a few staff began to mutter disappointed. “I know, I know. Look, I’m not gonna lie to you, we’ve had a few setbacks this week. But we all know Jay and Brad wanted more anything….and that was to see Hell Hazers 2: The Reckoning, on screens all across America!”

Staff nodded in agreement as he continued, “Now, we owe it to them to go on and to pull together and to make this damn movie, huh?!” McG began clapping another with the rest of the crew. Dean and Y/N chuckled as they clapped while Sam snorted. “But- not- not today. Go home, someone will call you” He stated, cutting the speech.

____________________________________________

Later, Sam and Y/N were sitting in the trailer, watching the uncut version of the movie to see if there were any more spirits caught on film as Dean entered. Both were bored out of their minds as Y/N lazily munched on popcorn. “Hey” Dean greeted them, shutting the door. “Hey” Sam and Y/N muttered in unison. “So you find out where the electrician’s buried?” Sam asked, stuffing his mouth with popcorn.

“He wasn’t. Billy Beard was cremated” Dean responded, opening the fridge to get a beer. “Great. Now what?” Y/N scoffed, resting the bowl of popcorn on Sam’s lap. “No idea” Dean sighed, settling on the couch next to Y/N. “Anymore ghost cameos in the dailies?” He asked. “Not in the first six hours” Sam scoffed.

“Oh, man” Dean muttered, shifting closer to Y/N, slightly propping his arm against the backrest of the couch. “This fucking sucks” Y/N groaned, her shoulders slumping. “Tell me about it” Sam sighed, his eyes glancing between the two before going back to the screen, shoveling another fistful of popcorn in his mouth.

“You know, maybe the spirits are trying to shut down the movie because they think it sucks? Because I mean, it kinda does” Sam voiced his thoughts out loud, earning chuckles from Dean and Y/N. “Oh come on, the dialogue is, you know, I mean…” Y/N trailed off, trying to think of something good about the movie.

“Y/N don’t try” Sam stated, the two shared a knowing look. “Alright, I can’t even argue with that,” She muttered. “Yeah, it’s terrible.” Dean agreed. They all continued to watch as Tara’s character, Wendy started to chant in Latin. Sam and Y/N’s ears perked up at the familiar chant she was speaking.

Y/N quickly snatched the remote from the table as she and Sam pushed themselves up from their relaxed positions. Dean shot them a confused look, “Listen to the invocation” Sam pointed out. “Fellas….that’s the real deal” Y/N gasped, both her and Sam sharing a terrified look. “That’s a necromantic summoning ritual,” Sam added.

“What the fuck is that doing in a Hollywood movie?” He scoffed.

-

Immediately, they headed over to Marty, the writer’s, office. He was currently in the middle of a phone call, placing up a finger for them to give him a second as they timidly walked in. “Guys, we’re all shut down. What are you still doing here?” Marty asked the trio after hanging up his call. “Yeah, um, it’s just- sorry man. We- we- we just couldn’t help ourselves” Sam stuttered, chuckling awkwardly.

“We just had to tell you that we read the script” Sam told him. “And?” He asked expectantly. Sam couldn’t bring himself to compliment the horrible script so Y/N stepped in, “It was awesome, sir” Y/N gushed as Dean nodded enthusiastically. “Awesome” Dean added as the writer’s smile widened.

“Really awesome” Sam fake gushed. “I know, it’s pretty rocking, right? I’m glad you guys liked it” Marty nodded, “Yeah, I really liked all the attention to detail” Sam said vaguely. “Dude, right on. That’s my thing, I mean, color me guilty, but that is me. I mean, I’m a total detail buff” Marty bragged, leaning back on his desk, his eyes scanning Y/N’s frame.

Dean took notice of this and internally rolled his eyes, slightly clenching his jaw. “No, I can tell. The way you worked in all those Enochian summoning rituals, in all the authentic language, and-” Y/N said but Marty cut her off. “Wait, you mean that Latin crap?” His smile dropped before shaking his head. “No, man. That’s Walter. Walter Dixon, the original writer” He told them, it was their turn for their faces to drop.

“You like that garbage?” Marty scoffed as he made his way over to his chair. “Wait. Walter the PA, Walter?” Dean asked for clarification. “No, he’s not a PA. He’s got a clause in his contract that allows him to come on set” Marty informed them, taking a seat on his chair. “But he wrote the invocations?” Dean questioned.

“He wrote a whack-job screenplay. There’s no pace, there’s no love interest. It’s all wackadoo exposition” Marty rambled on with disgust. “I had to cut like 90 percent of it to make it readable. Another 10 percent to make it good” He continued, picking up a script from his desk. The trio chuckled dryly as the man continued to talk.

____________________________________________

“Should've kept Walter's original script. It’s actually pretty good” Dean commented as they all held copies of the original script, reading it in their trailer. “Yeah” Sam scoffed, folding it up and tossing it aside before resting his hands behind his head. “And it reads like a how-to manual of conjugation. Like a textbook on how to summon ghosts and get them to do whatever you want” Sam said.

“Yeah, like kill people” Y/N muttered, flipping through the script. “Yep” Sam sighed. “So let’s say somewhere down the line Walter learned some pretty Black Magic” Y/N began, tossing her script on Dean’s lap. “Yeah, and let’s say he’s pissed at these people for wrecking his movie,” Dean added. “Motive and means” Sam deadpanned as they put two and two together.

“It’s worth checking out” Dean shrugged as they all shared a look. “Just once. Once, can someone haunt a strip club” Y/N groaned, sinking into the couch next to Dean. “Or a beach house, or a Playboy mansion” Dean agreed, tilting his arm back as he rested his arm behind her on the backrest of the couch.

“Or a candy factory. I’d like to be killed by gumdrops” Y/N added, imagining such a scenario. “Or-or a theme park. Death by log flume” Dean stated. “A puppy farm” Y/N giggled, imagining herself chased by a stampede of puppies as she leaned into his arm.

Sam shot them an amused look of disbelief. “You two are unbelievable” He stated. “Yeah, yeah,” They both scoffed, waving off his judgment, neither denying nor confirming.

____________________________________________

The trio made their way to the set, wielding their rocksalt guns. Their ears perked up when they heard Marty screaming for mercy and the fan that Jay was killed in was turnt on. “Oh, God!! Walter!!” Marty screamed with terror as Dean and Y/N bent the corner. “Now you’re gonna find out what being a ghost is really like!” Walter shot back.

“Walter please, Walter help me!!!” Marty begged. Y/N immediately aimed for the ghost of Billy Beard, dragging Marty towards the fan. A round of rocksalt went through his chest, causing him to disapparate. Dean and Y/N stood over a grateful Marty as Sam turnt the large fan off. “You are one hell of PAs” Marty said breathlessly. “Yeah, we know” Dean deadpanned a bit smugly as Y/N helped Marty up.

Y/N narrowed her eyes at Walter along with Sam, she and the young Winchester started stalking towards him, jaws clenched and infuriated. “W-what are you doing??” Walter stammered quickly, making a break for the stairs. “We could ask you the same thing Walter. Raising these spirits from the dead?! Making them murder for you?! That’s playing with fire, Walter!” Sam shouted at him.

“You don’t understand,” Walter sobbed, running further up the catwalk. “You know what, you’re right. We don’t understand!” Y/N shouted, aiming her gun at him. “Wait, wait, look.” Walter pleaded. “You put your heart and soul into something. Years of hard work. Years. And then they take it!! And they crap all over it!!” Walter raged as Marty scoffed and shook his head arrogantly.

“And then- and then they want you to smile and say thank you” Walter growled. “Walter, listen, it’s just a movie. That’s it” Sam tried to reason, trying to snatch y/n’s gun away from her but she didn’t let up. Walter took a deep breath, trying to regulate his breathing. “Look, I got nothing against you, guys. You’re not part of this. Just please, please, just leave” Walter begged them.

“But Martins gonna stay” He ordered, pointing to Marty. “Sorry, can't do that” Dean chimed in. “I mean, it’s not that we like him or anything, it’s just a matter of principle!” Dean shouted, warning a slightly offended look from Marty. “Then I’m sorry too” Walter said ominously before raising the pendant in his hand that binder the spirits. “Walter, please- no!” Sam pleaded as Walter began chanting in Latin.

The room began to shake as the spirits began emerging. Y/N’s body grew weaker, her breathing becoming more intense. “Y/N?!” Dean called to her worriedly, seeing her struggling to stand upright. “I’m…I’m ok” She lied, still trying to raise her gun, shaking uncontrollably. The spirits began inching towards them. “Sam!” Dean screamed, indicating for Sam to stay behind them.

“Come on, come on!” Y/N growled, the heaviness overweighting her and then suddenly, they disapparated. Leaving them confused. Only for Sam to be tossed to one side of the room. “Sam!!” Dean called out again, rushing over to his brother.

Y/N attempted to go shoot them but was quickly slammed against the wall, her gun falling from her hands as she cried out. “Y/N!” Dean called out to her, watching as she was repeatedly slammed against the wall, pinned against it by the flickering spirit. Dean then shot the spirit, causing it to disapparate, quickly helping y/n up.

“You good?” Dean asked her, worry staining his face as she nodded, scrambling for her gun. “Yes. I’m ok..” She lied again, leaning against him as he helped her limp into the fake house on the set, with Sam shutting the door behind them, all breathing heavily. “Come to the coast, we’ll get together, have a few laughs” Y/N mocked Dean’s words from a couple days ago in a high pitched tone.

This earned her a glare from him as they loaded up their guns with rocksalt. “Ah, fuck!” Dean groaned, cocking his gun alone with y/n. “I can’t believe this. Ghosts are real” Marty panicked. “What makes you say that?” Dean sassed sarcastically, not having any of it. The place was eerily quiet as they scanned the area. “I don’t understand. How is Walter controlling them?” Marty asked.

“Probably with that talisman” Y/N answered. “Can you see them?” Dean asked, so y/n flashed her eyes white, scanning the room. “How is she doing that?!” Marty exclaimed. “You ask a lot of questions Marty!” Dean snapped. A thought crossed Sam’s mind, the younger Winchester quickly pulling out his phone. “What are you doing?!” He asked Sam. “I mean, if film cameras pick these suckers up, then…maybe…uh…” Sam answered, using his phone camera to scan the room.

His eyes widened when the deformed spirit of Billy Beard came into view, Y/N spotted him at the same time Sam yelled. “Dean, Y/N. Right there!” The two instantly shot him, the rock salt hitting the wall behind them. “Got him!” Sam gasped, all breathing heavily. Sam and Y/N continued scanning with his phone and her eyes.

Y/N felt a chill behind her, swiftly turning around to shoot besides Dean where another spirit was going to attack him. Y/N noticed Walter above them on the catwalk, trying to get away. She and Sam shared a look, nodding in agreement. “Here, you get the idea?!” Sam instructed Marty, handing him his cellphone. Marty nodded obediently, taking the phone from Sam.

“Alright, you hold ‘em off, charming. We’re going after Walter!” Y/N told Dean, stuffing her gun into Marty’s hands. “Hey!” Dean called out to her, making her stop in her tracks as Sam ran out towards Walter, “Be safe” He pleaded as she turned to him.

“Ditto” Y/N replied with a smile, flashing him a quick wink with promise. She then hurried to the stairs, her and Sam running up the steps, they made it to the roof just in the Nick of time. Walter came rushing through the door to see Sam and Y/N, he stopped in his tracks. “It’s over Walter. Now give it to me” Sam ordered him, putting his hand out for Walter to hand him the talisman.

Their jaws dropped when Walter tossed it into the ground, breaking it. “There, okay, now no one can have it!” Walter shouted. Y/N might be a sympathetic person but she had to stop herself from laughing at the utter stupidity Walter just displayed by breaking the talisman. Pressing a hand over her mouth, “I wouldn’t have done that if i were you” Y/N muttered fearfully and Sam put up his hands in surrender.

He quickly pulled Y/N back by her wrist, backing away from Walter. “Oh yeah?” Walter scoffed. “Yeah” Sam shot back. “And why not?” Walter rolled his eyes arrogantly. “Because you just freed them!” Sam shouted as Dean and Marty came rushing through the door. “And we can’t stop them now” He added and both him and Y/N continued to back away.

“Walter, you brought them back, forced them to murder. They’re not gonna be very happy with you” Y/N pointed out as she and Sam inched towards Dean and Marty. “Yeah? So why not?” Walter scoffed when suddenly the spirits began growling, grabbing a hold of Walter. He began screaming for mercy as the spirits began clawing at him, his light blue shirt now staining in his own blood.

“And there’s your answer,” Y/N stated coldly, wincing when Walter’s cries of terror and agony filled the night air. Sam put a hand around her shoulder, gently guiding her away from the gory scene but she saw everything. Marty held the camera up, getting a clear view of all the spirits attacking and mauling Marty, unfortunately, y/n didn’t need the camera to see and it made her feel sick to her stomach.

____________________________________________

A couple days later, shooting is back in session. Two of the actors were in the middle of a scene. “Oh, God…oh god” Sandra gasped, holding up a phone camera before screaming, “There!” The other actor shot in the direction she pointed at, and all the staff were loving it. “I don’t understand. How can the spirits appear in the camera phone? And how can you see them but we can’t?” Sandra asked, pointing to a new character, Kelly.

Kelly shrugged, “I’m psychic. And the video picks up their frequencies in ways your eyes can’t” She said sheepishly, Sam and Y/N were standing besides Marty, the judgmental looks clear on their faces. Y/N cringed when Kelly’s actress said that, rolling her eyes in annoyance as she crossed her arms over her chest.

“Cut!!” McG ended the scene. “Oh, print that one. That’s in the movie!” He cheered excitedly as the bell on set rang. “Oh! Loved it kids, loved it!” He exclaimed as Sam and Y/N scoffed, shaking their heads. “You find out there’s an afterlife and psychics and this is what you do with it?” Sam said in a low tone to Marty who was wearing a huge grin.

“I needed a little jazz on the page,” Marty shrugged, his eyes flickering over to Y/N. Y/N caught his glance, returning it with a glare of her own, crossing her arms over her chest. Marty just smirked in return, “Don’t look so glum, gorgeous. Tilly is playing a great you as Kelly” Marty grinned.

Y/N huffed, not amused by Marty’s comment. She looked away, watching as some of the crew members were setting up a scene in front of her.

____________________________________________

“Where the hell is he?” Sam grumbled in annoyance to Y/N as they walked around the lot looking for Dean. They stopped in their tracks when Tara’s trailer door swung open suddenly, almost hitting them both in the process. Our walked a very disheveled Dean, fixing his jacket and Tara leaning against the door, a sultry look on her face. “You’re one hell of a PA” She breathed out.

Dean’s eyes landed on Y/N, filled with guilt but the female hunter kept a stoic expression as Sam’s jaw dropped. Y/N felt as though someone just ripped her heart out, chewed it up and stomped on it with steel tipped boots. She could’ve vomited on the spot, just thinking about Dean with someone else.

No more Tara Benchley movies for her, that’s for sure.

“Thank you” Dean said sheepishly to Tara, who gave him a sultry smile. “Don’t mention it” Tara replied, the lustful look never leaving her face. Y/N’s heart was aching as she watched the interaction, a sickening nauseous feeling flooding her body. Dean’s eyes quickly flickered to her, seeing the neutral look on her face.

“You were a real gentleman” She added, still keeping her eyes on Dean as he nervously scratched the back of his head. He stole glances at his friend, the stoic look in her eye made his heart sink.

Sam was looking between his brother and best friend, seeing the hurt wash over her face and a look of guilt spreading through his brother's face. He shot Y/N a sympathetic look but she kept her face neutral.

“I guess I’ll see you around” He said quietly, Tara who just smirked at him. “I sure hope so,” She told him, eyeing him up and down. “Let’s go” Y/N ordered, trying to keep her voice firm. She turned on her heel, Sam following her as he gave Dean a stern scowl. Dean gulped, running after them with a smug look on his face.

Dean had yet to notice the clear range of emotions y/n was going through, though she was masking it well. Sam wasn’t stupid, he saw right through his best friend. Y/N fished her pack of cigarettes from her jacket, instantly lightly one up while Dean grabbed a burrito from the cart one of the caterers were lugging around. “God I love this town” Dean pranced happily between Sam and Y/N.

Y/N didn’t speak, instead keeping her gaze straight ahead as she took another huff of the cigarette, a cloud of smoke escaping her mouth. Sam sent a nervous glance at his friend, noticing the dark look in her eyes and the rigid stiffness in her shoulders.

She’d be a hypocrite to say that she wasn’t trying to get into Tara’s pants too. She totally was, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. She spent the next couple of minutes plotting to get laid at their next stop.

____________________________________________

Author's Note: And there we have itttt, I just wanna say once again, thank you for the patience and supporting me endlessly❤️❤️❤️

I hope everyone enjoyed it and I’m so excited for the next two episodes! I’ve already started on it lol

Taglist: @hjgdhghoe @rach5ive @tiggytaylor @star-yawnznn @quarterhorse19

@deangirl96 @bitchykittenconnoisseur @globetrotter28 @hobby27 @mrsjjkwinchester

@juwu-theliciosa @magiccliopleurodon @nesnejwritings @karrah89 @whattheduckisupkyle

@iloveyou2mia @thelittlelightinthedarkness @lmhf1 @littletomboy2 @zigzoggy

@hey-its-zoe @modiddys-blog @thvxr

Xoxo

[phoenixtakaramono]

OPERATION BABYLON - PART VII

aka the butchlander sugar baby AU.

Tumblr Navigation (note I have not shared the prologue here with its premise setup; I’ve only started sharing this twitter threadfic on tumblr starting from the 2nd 🔞 scene): I | II | III | IV | V | VI | VII

Update Schedule: weekly/ biweekly

(You can read the rest of the threadfic update here!)

Keep in mind, all of my AU Butchlander threadfics on Twitter are the unpolished first draft versions of what’ll eventually be polished up into long fics on AO3 under the Shock and Awe series. So you may regard this threadfic as an experimental first prototype and exclusive preview whose contents may or may not be changed in the future final draft version. We’re just loosely playing around with ideas and concepts for now!

If you don’t have a Twitter account, screenshots are provided below the line break so you can read this update on Tumblr as well:

A/N - ...I shouldn't be surprised but it's always a surprise to me seeing the effect whenever I switch POVs in my fics (because, depending on who's POV it is, it somehow always humanizes the male chara whose POV I'm in and makes him seem...softer than were I to write in the opposite POV).

In Billy's POV = HL is provocative and manly

In HL's POV = Billy is provocative and manly

Maybe it's just me imagining this strange phenomenon but I feel the dynamic has certainly flipped a tad when this happens, haha.

Next update we'll get the stereotypical rich sug*r d*ddy spoiling and pampering his wide-eyed sug*r b*by scene. Tbh I tried to fit it into this update but it didn't feel like it's the right placement yet and it needs buildup (to set up the next spicy scene). Homelander has to earn that D 🍆 💦.

[sophaeros]

arctic monkeys for q magazine, june 2011 (x) (x)

ARCTIC MONKEYS: Inside Alex Turner's Head

Words Sylvia Patterson Portrait John Wright

The day Arctic Monkeys moved into their six bedroom, Spanish-style villa in the Hollywood Hills, where the first-floor balcony looked over the patio swimming pool, they knew exactly what to do.

"From the balcony, you could get on t'roof and jump in't pool," chirps the Monkeys' most gregarious member, drummer Matt Helders, in his homely Yorkshire way. "We looked at it and said, That's definitely gonna happen. So by the end, we did a couple of 'em. Somersaults in t'pool, from the roof. At night time."

In January 2011, as Sheffield and the rest of Britain endured its bitterest winter in a century, Arctic Monkeys capered among the palm trees, eschewing hotels for a millionaire's Hollywood homestead as they recorded and mixed their fourth studio album, Suck It and See.

The four Monkeys, alongside producer James Ford and engineer James Brown, lived what they called the "American man thing": watched Super Bowl on giant TVs, played ping-pong, hired two Mustangs, cooked cartoon Tom And Jerry-sized steaks on barbecues on Sundays, had girlfriends over to visit, all cooking and drinking around the colossal outdoor kitchen area featuring a fridge and two dishwashers. Living atop the Hills, they could see the Pacific Ocean beyond by day, the infinite glittering lights of downtown LA by night.

Every day, en route to Sound City Studios, they'd travel in a seven-seater four-by-four through the mountains, via bohemian 60s enclave Laurel Canyon, blaring out the tunes: The Stones Roses, The Cramps, the Misfits' Hollywood Babylon. For the sometime teenage art-punk renegades whose guitarist, Jamie Cook, was once ejected from London's Met Bar for refusing to pay €22 for two beers, the comedy rock'n'roll life still feels, however, absolutely nothing like reality.

NICK O'MALLEY: "It were really as if we were on holiday. When we came back it's the most post-holiday blues I've ever had!"

JAMIE COOK: "It's hard to comment on that. It were just really good fun."

MATT HELDERS: "We always said, As soon as things like that feel normal, we're in trouble. But it's just funny. You might think it would get more and more serious as you get older but it's getting funnier. We've done four albums now and I'm still only 24, I'm still immature to an extent. So who cares?"

Alex? Al? Are you there?

ALEX TURNER: "Yeah, it were good times. But we were in the studio most of the time. So there's no real wild Hollywood stories. Hmn. Yeah."

Wednesday, 16 March 2011, Strongroom Bar, Shoreditch, East London, 11am. Alex Turner, 25, slips entirely alone into an empty art-crowd brasserie looking like an indie girl's indie dream boy: mop-top bouffant hair which coils, in curlicues, directly into his cheekbones, army-green waist-length jacket, baggy-arsed skinny jeans, black cord zip-up cardigan, simple gold chain, supermoon sized chocolate-brown eyes.

Almost six years after I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor became the indie-punk anthem of a generation (from the first of Arctic Monkeys' three Number 1 albums), and nothing prepares you for the curious phenomenon of Alex Turner "in conversation". Unlike so many of the Monkeys frenetic early songs, he operates in slow motion, seemingly underwater, carrying a protective shell on his back, perhaps indie rock's very own diamond-backed terrapin. The most celebrated young wordsmith in rock'n roll today talks fulsomely, in fact, only in shapeless, curling sentences punctuated with "maybe... hmn.. yeah", an anecdotal wilderness sketching pictures as vague as a cloud. He is, though, simultaneously adorable: amenable, gentle, graceful, and as Northern as a 70s grandpa who literally greets you with "ey oop?".

"People think I'm a miserable bastard," he notes, cheerfully, "but it's just the way me face falls." Still profoundly private, if not as hermetically sealed as a vacuum-packed length of Frankfurter, his fante-shy reticence extends not only to his personal life (his four-year relationship with It-girl/TV presenter Alexa Chung, whom he never mentions) but to insider details generally. Take the Monkeys’ Hollywood high jinks documented above: not one word of it was described by Turner. Before Q was informed by his other Monkey bandmates, Turner’s anecdotal aversion unfolded like this:

Describe the lovely villa you were in. AT: "Well... we certainly had a... good view."

Of what? AT: "Well, we were up quite high."

The downtown LA lights going on forever? AT: "I dunno. It was definitely that thing of getting a bit of sort of sunshine. Is it vitamin D? If you can get vitamin D on your record, you've got a bit of a head start. So we'd get up and drive to the studio."

What were you driving? AT: "Nothing... spectacular. But yeah, we'd drive up the studio, spend all day there and sort of, y know, get back. To be honest... we had limited time. So we spent as much time as possible kind of getting into it, like, in the studio.

So your favourite adventures were what? AT: "Well, they were really… minimal. We were working out there!"

Any nightclubs or anything, perhaps? AT: "You really want the goss 'ere, don't you?"

Yes, please. AT: "I could make some up. Nah!"

And this was on the second time of asking. It's perhaps obvious: Alex Turner, one of the most prolific songwriters of his generation (four Monkeys albums and two EPs in five years, The Last Shadow Puppets side-project, a bewitching acoustic soundtrack for his actor/video director friend Richard Ayoade's feature-length debut Submarine), is dedicated only to the cause – of being the best he can possibly be. He simply remembers the songs much more than the somersaults.

Throughout 2009, Arctic Monkeys toured third album Humbug – the record mostly made in the Californian desert with Queens Of The Stone Age man-monolith Josh Homme – across the planet. While hardly some cranium-blistering opus, its heavier sonic meanderings considerably slowed the Arctic Monkeys' live sets and on 23 August 2009, Q watched them headline the Lowlands Festival, Holland and witnessed a hitherto unthinkable sight – swathes of perplexed Monkeys fans trudging away from the stage. With the sludge rock mood matching their cascading dude-rock hair it seemed obvious: they'd smoked way too much outrageously strong weed in the desert.

"Heheheh, yeah," responds Turner, unperturbed. "That's your theory. You probably weren't alone."

Back in the Strongroom Bar, Turner's arm is now nonchalantly draped along the back of a beaten-up brown leather sofa. He ponders his band's somewhat contrary reputation…

"I think starting the headline set at Reading with a cover of a Nick Cave tune perhaps was a bit contrary. D'youknowhat Imean?! But to be honest, that summer, at those festivals, we had a great time. And I know some fans enjoyed those sets 10 times more. And you can't just do, y’know, another Mardy Bum or whatever. Because how could you, really?"

With Humbug, notes Turner, "I went into corners I hadn't before, because I needed to see what were there," but by spring 2010 he wanted their fourth album to be "more song-based" and less lyrically "removed". He was "organised this time", studied "the good songwriters" (from Nick Cave, The Byrds and Leonard Cohen to country colossi Johnny Cash and Patsy Cline), discovered "the other three strings" on his guitar, and wrote 12 songs through the spring and summer of 2010, mostly in the fourth-floor New York flat he shared with Chung before the couple moved back to London late last summer (the New York MTV show It's On With Alexa Chung was cancelled after two seasons). The result: major-key melodies, harmonised singing and classic song structures.

At the same time he revisited the opposite extreme: bands such as Black Sabbath and The Stooges ("we wanted a few wig-outs as well"); he was also still heavily influenced by the oil-thick grinder rock of Josh Homme, who is clearly now a permanent Monkeys hero. After four months' rehearsals in London, on 8 January the Monkeys relocated to LA for five swift weeks of production and Homme came to visit, singing backing vocals on All My Own Stunts. Tequila was involved.

"Tequila is probably me favourite," manages Turner, by way of an anecdote. "But it takes a certain climate... It's not the same... in the rain. Yeah. [Looks to be contemplating a lyric] Tequila in the rain."

Vocally, he developed the caramel richness first unveiled on The Last Shadow Puppets' Scott Walker-esque The Age Of The Understatement, finding a crooner's vibrato. "Everything before was so tight,” he notes, clutching his neck. "Probably just through nerves. That's just not there any more." Suck It and See contains at least four of the most glittering, sing-along, world-class pop songs (and obvious singles) of Arctic Monkeys' career: the towering, clanging She's Thunderstorms, the summertime stunner The Hellcat Spangled Shalalala, the heavenly harmonised title track and the Echo & The Bunnymen-esque jangly pop of closer That's Where You're Wrong.

Elsewhere, in typically contrary "fashion", there's preposterous head-banger bedlam (Brick By Brick, the rollicking faux-heavy rock download they released in March "just for fun", featuring vocals by Helders; Don't Sit Down 'Cause I've Moved Your Chair, and Library Pictures). News arrives that the first single proper will be Don't Sit Down 'Cause I've Moved Your Chair. Q is perplexed. Brilliantly titled, certainly, but arriving after Brick By Brick, the new album will appear to the planet as some comedy pastiche metal album for 12-year-old boys.

You've got all these colossal, summery, indie-pop classics and you've gone for... The Chair? AT: [Laughing uproariously] "The Chair! I'm now calling it The Chair, that's cool. Well for once it weren't even our suggestion. It was Laurence's (Bell, Domino label boss). And I were, Fucking too right! He's awesome. It'd be good to get a bit of fucking rock'n'roll out there, won't it? It's riffs. It's loud. It's funny."

If you don't release The Hellcat Spangled Shalalala as a single I'm going round Domino to kick Laurence's "awesome" butt. AT: "I think it'll be the next one!"

The record's title, meanwhile, could've been more enigmatically original than the un-loved phrase Suck It and See. The band, struggling with ideas due to the opposing sonic moods, invented an inspiration-conjuring ruse: to think of new names for effects pedals in the style of Tom Wolfe, Turner being long enamoured with the American author's legendarily psychedelic books The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test and The Kandy-Kolored Tangerine-Flake Streamline Baby, "cos that just sounds awesome".

"There's the Big Muff pedal," he elaborates, "That’s the classic. I've got the Valve Slapper. And there's the Tube Screamer. So we came up with the Thunder Suckle Fuzz Canyon. And… wait till I assemble it in me mind… em… it'll come to me… The Blonde-O-Sonic Shimmer Trap. So we were going for summat like that."

A wasted opportunity?

"Nah. Because some of those things ended up in the lyrics anyway. Suck It and See was just easier."

Alex Turner, rock'n'roll's premier descriptive art-poet, still writes his lyrics long-hand in spiral-bound notebooks. "Writing lyrics is a craft that I've practised a bit now," he avers. "In me notebook it looks like sums. Theories. There's words and arrows going everywhere. There's always a few possibilities and I write the word 'OR' in a square."

For our most celebrated colloquial sketch-writer of the everyday observation (all betting pencils, boy slags and ice-cream van aggravations) the more successful he becomes, the less he orbits the ordinary. "I'm not struggling with that, to be honest," he decides. "In fact I'm enjoying writing lyrics much more than I did. Stories. Describing a picture. Um. There's quite a bit of weather and time in this one. Which is probably not reassuring. 'Oh God, he's writing about the weather.' Maybe leave that out!"

There are also some direct, funny, romantic observations: "That's not a skirt, girl, that's a sawn-off shotgun/And I only hope you've got it aimed at me..." (from the title track).

Some of your romantic quips, now, must be about Alexa. AT: "Right. Yeah. Definitely. Well... there's always been that side to our songs, when we weren't writing about... the fucking taxi rank. It's kind of inevitably... people you're with." [At the mention of Chung's name, Turner is visibly aggrieved, head sliding into his neck, terrapin-esque indeed.]

It must have been very grounding being in a proper relationship through all this madness. Because if you weren't, girls would be jumping all over your head. AT: "Em. Hmn. Well, of course that helps you to... I don't really know.. what the other way would be."

Does Alexa wonder if the lyrics are about her? AT: "Oh there's none of that. Yeah, no, there's no looking over the shoulder."

She must be curious, at least. "Maybe."

Did you ever watch Popworld? AT: [Nervous laughter] "Em! Now and again."

Did you ever see the episode where she helps Paul McCartney write a song about shoes? AT: "Ah, yeah I think so, maybe I did see that."

Well, if I was you, I'd have been thinking, "She's the one for me." AT: "Well. Yeah... maybe that would've... sealed the deal! Hmn. But maybe that wasn't when i got the ray of light. When was? Nah [buries head in hands]. I might have to go for a cigarette..."

Q can't torture him any more and joins him for a snout. Turner smokes Camels from a crumpled, sad, soft-pack and resembles a teenager again. As early song You Probably Couldn't See For The Lights But You Were Staring Straight At Me says, "Never tenser/Could all go a bit Frank Spencer…”

In January 2006, when Arctic Monkeys' Number 1 album Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not became the fastest-selling debut in UK history, inadvertently redefining the concept of autonomy and further imploding the decimated music industry (& wasn't their idea to be "the MySpace band", it was their fans': the Monkeys merely kick-started viral marketing by giving away demos at gigs), the 19- and 20-year-old Monkeys were terrible at fame. They weren't so much insurrectionary teenage upstarts as teenage innocents culturally traumatised by the peak-era fame democracy.

To their generation (born in the mid-'80s) fame was now synonymous with some-twat-off-the-telly a world of foaming tabloid hysteria where renown and celebrity meant, in fact, you were talentless. Hence their interview diffidence and receiving awards via videos dressed up as the Wizard OfOz and the Village People. Which only, ironically, made them even more celebrated and famous. (“That were a product of us just trying to hold onto the reins," thinks Turner today. "Being uncooperative.")

Q meets The Other Three one morning at 11am, in the well-appointed, empty bar of the Bethnal Green, Bast London hotel they're staying in (all three live in Sheffield, with their girlfriends, in their own homes). First to arrive is the industrious, sensible and cheerful Helders, crunching into a hangover-curing green apple. He has recovered from last year's boxing accident at the gym, which left his broken arm requiring a fitted plate. Now impressively purple-scarred, the break felt "interesting" and the doctor couldn't resist the one-armed drummer jest: "D'you like Def Leppard?"

Currently enjoying an enduring bromance with Diddy, he still doesn't feel famous, "it just doesn't feel that real, there's no paparazzi waiting for me to trip up." He and Turner, during the four-month rehearsals last year, became an accomplished roast dinner cooking duo for the band. "I reckon we could have us our own cookbook," he beams. "Pictures of us stirring, with a whisk."

O'Malley, an agreeable, twinkly-eyed 25-year-old with a strikingly deep voice and a winningly huge smile, is still coyly embarrassed by the interview process. A replacement for the departed original bass player Andy Nicholson in May 2006, he went from Asda shelf-filler to Glastonbury headliner in 13 months and still finds the Monkeys "a massive adventure". His life in Sheffield is profoundly normal – he's delighted that his new home since last October has an open-hearth fireplace: "Me parents had electric bars." He has also discovered cooking. “I’m just a pretty shit-hot housewife, most of the time," he smiles. "I cook stews, fish combinations, curries, chillies. I made a beef pho noodle soup the other day, Vietnamese, I surprised meself, had some mates round for that."

Recently, at his dad's 50th birthday bash, the party band, made up of family and friends, insisted he join them onstage "for ...The Dancefloor. So I were up there [mimes playing bass, all sheepish] and it were the wrong pitch, they didn't know the words or 'owt, going, Makin eyes... er..." He has no extra-curricular musical ambitions. "I'm happy just playing bass," he smiles. "I've never had the skill of doing songs meself. It'd be shit!"

Cook, 25, is still spectacularly embarrassed by the interview process. He perches upright, with a fixed nervous smile, newly shorn of the beard and ponytail he sported in LA: "Rockin' a pone, yeah, because I could get away with it." With his classic preppy haircut and dapper green military coat (from London's swish department store, Liberty), he looks like a handsome '40s film star. (Turner deems Cook "the band heartbreaker" and had a word with him post-LA: "I said to him, Come on, mate, you've got to get that beard shaved off. Get the girls back into us. Shift some posters.")

His life in Sheffield is also profoundly normal. He still plays Sunday League football with his local pub team, The Pack Horse FC (position, left back), remains in his long-term relationship with page-three-model-turned-make-up-artist Katie Downes and "potters about" at home, refusing to describe said home, "cos I'll get burgled".

A tiler by trade, he always vowed, should the Monkeys sign a deal, that he'd throw his trowel in a Sheffield river on his last day of work. "I never did fling me trowel," he confirms. "Probably still in me shed." He's never considered what his band represents to his generation. "I'd go insane thinking about it, I'm pretty good at not thinking about it… Oh God. I'm terrible at this!"

Back in the Strongroom Bar, Alex Turner is cloudily describing his everyday life. "I just keep meself to meself," he confounds. He mostly stays indoors and his perfect night in with Alexa is "watching loads of Sopranos. And doing roast dinners".

No longer spindle-limbed, he attends a gym and has handsomely well-defined arms – "You have to look after yourself."

Suddenly, Crying Lightning from Humbug rumbles over the bar stereo. "Wow. How about that? I was quite happy the other morning cos Brick By Brick were on the round-up goals on Soccer AM. It's still exciting when that happens. It was like Brick By Brick is real."

He spends his days writing music, "listening to records", and recommends Blues Run The Game by doomed '60s minstrel Jackson C Frank ("who's that lass?... Laura Marling, she did a cover recently), a simple, acoustic, deep and regretful stunner about missing someone on the road.

Lyrically, he cites as an example of greatness the Nick Cave B-side Little Empty Boat [from ‘97 single Into My Arms ], a comically sinister paean to a sexual power struggle: "Your knowledge is impressive and your argument is good/But I am the resurrection babe and you're standing on my foot."

"I need a hobby," he suddenly decides. "I'd like to learn another language." Since his mum is a German teacher (his dad teaches music), surely he can speak some German? "I know how to ask somebody if they've had fun at Christmas." Go on, then. "Nah!"

Where Turner's creative gifts stem from remains a contemporary rock'n'roll mystery; he became a fledgling songwriter at 16, after the gift of a guitar at Christmas from his parents. An only child, did his folks, perhaps, foresee artistic greatness? "I doubt it!" he balks. "Cos I didn't. I wasn't... a show kid." Like the others, he doesn't analyse the past, or the future.

"You can't constantly be thinking about what's happened," he reasons, "it's just about getting on with it." The elaborate pinky ring he now constantly wears, however, a silver, gold and ruby metal-goth corker featuring the words DEATH RAMPS is a permanent reminder of he and his best friends’ past. The Death Ramps is not only a Monkeys pseudonym and B-side to Teddy Picker, but a place they used to ride their bikes in Sheffield as kids.

"Up in the woods near where we lived," he nods. "Just little hills. But when you're eight years old they're death ramps." The ring was custom made by a friend of his, who runs top-end rock'n'roll jewellery emporium The Great Frog near London's Carnaby Street. Ask Turner why he thinks the chase between his writing and speaking eloquence is quite so mesmerisingly vast and he attempts a theory.

"Well, writing isn't the same as speaking," he muses. "Not for me. I seem to struggle more and more with... conversation. Talking onstage... I can't do it any more. Hmn. I'll have to work on that."

The ever-helpful Helders has a better theory.

"Since he's been writing songs," he ponders, “It seems like he’s always thinking about that. So even when he’s talking to you now, he’s thinking about the next thing that rhymes with a word. Even when he’s driving. We joke he’s a bad driver, his focus is never 100 per cent on what he’s doing. Which is good for us cos it means he’s got another 12 songs up his sleeve. I think music must be the easiest way for him to be concise and get everything out. Otherwise his head would explode.”

The Shoreditch.com photo studios, 18 March. Alex Turner, today, is more ethereally distracted than ever, transfixed by the studio iPod, playing Led Zeppelin, The Rolling Stones, a version of I’d Rather Go Blind. Occasionally, he’ll completely lose his conversational thread, “Um. I’ve dropped a stitch.”

The first to arrive for Q’s photoshoot, he greets his incoming bandmates with enormous hugs (and also hugs them goodbye). Today, Q feels it’s pointless poking its pickaxe of serious enquiry further into Turner’s vacuum-packed soul and wonders if he’ll play, instead, a daft game. It’s called Popworld Questions, as first posed by someone he knows rather well.

“Oh, OK. Let’s do it,” he blinks, now perched in an empty dressing room. He then vigorously shakes his head, “Um…I’ve gotta snap back into it.”

Here, then, are some genuine “Alexa Chung on Popworld” questions (2006-2007), as originally posed to Matt Willis, Amy Winehouse, Robbie Williams, Pussycat Dolls, Kaiser Chiefs and Diddy.

Why do indie bands wear such tight jeans? AT: “Um. I supposed they do. They haven’t always. When we first were playing I was definitely in flares. You need to be quite tall to get the full effect, though. So, that's why this indie band wears such tight jeans, cos we've not got the legs for flares."

What makes you tick in the sexy department? AT: "Wow. Pass. What do I find most attractive in a woman? Something in the head? That's definitely a requirement. Well... Hmn. I'm struggling."

Tell us about all the lovely groupies. AT: "No!"

If dogs had human hands instead of paws, would you consider trying to teach them to play the piano? AT: "Absolutely. I'd teach Hey Jude."

How many plums d'you think you can comfortably fit in one hand? AT: "They're not very big. [Holds small, pale, girly hand up for inspection] It's a shame. Probably three. Diddy only managed two? Maybe not then. I can carry a lot of glasses at once, though. If they're small ones I can do four."

Are you cool? AT: "Not as much as I'd like to be. There's this clip where Clint Eastwood is on a talkshow and he gets asked, Everybody thinks of you as defining cool, what d'you think about that? And he gets his cigs out, takes one out, flicks it into his mouth, lights it and says, I have no idea what you're talking about."

Here, Turner locates his Camels soft-pack and attempts to do a Clint Eastwood. He flicks one upwards towards his mouth. And misses. Flicks another. And misses. "Third time lucky?" He misses. "I'll get it the next time." And succeeds. "Hey. Fourth time. Don't put that in! So there you go. I'm four steps away from where I wanna be."

Thank you very much for joining me here on Popworld, here's my clammy hand again. There it is, let it slip, hmmn. You can let go now. AT: "OK! Were you a Popworld fan, then? It was funny. Cool. What were we talking about, before?"

Blimey, Alex. What must you be like when you're completely stoned out of your head? AT: "Stoned? What d'you mean, cos I seem like that anyway? Yeah. A lot of people... tell me I'm a bit... dreamy. But I like the idea of that. Of being somewhere else."

Two days earlier, Turner had contemplated what he wanted from all this, in the end. Many seconds later he gave his deceptively ambitious answer.

"I just wanna write better songs," he decided. "And better lyrics. I just definitely wanna be good at it. Hmn. Yeah.”

—

RUFUS BLACK: AKA Matt Helders, on his ongoing bromance with Diddy

Matt Helders has known preposterous rap titan Diddy since they met in Miami in 2008. “He goes, Arctic Monkeys! Then he said summat about a B-side and I was like, He's not lying! I just thought, This is funny, I'm gonna go with this for a while." Last October Diddy texted Helders, suggesting he play drums with his Diddy Dirty Money band on Friday Night With Jonathan Ross, to give his own drummer a day off. “I were bowling with me girifriend at the time. In Sheffield, on a Sunday." On the day of recording, says Helder, "We had a musical director. That were one of the maddest times of my life. Next day Diddy said, Why don't you just stay? Come along with me. So I went everywhere with him." Diddy had "a convoy of cars" and made sure Helders was always in his. "He'd stop his car and go, Where's Matt? You're coming with me! So I'd get in his car. Just me, him, his security, driver." Diddy, by now, had given him a pseudonym - Rufus Black. "He kept saying, I don't wanna fuck up your image. And I'm, I don't think it's gonna do me any harm!" He stayed in Diddy's spectacularly expensive hotel. Some weeks later, Helders almost returned to the Dirty Money drumstool for a gig in Glasgow. "But we were rehearsing in London. I were like, I might come, how are you getting there? And he were like, Jet. Jump on t’jet with me. But I had to stay in Bethnal Green instead.”

Love’s young dream: Diddy (left) with Helders

[tenebraevesper]

Sonic Cyber Revolution & Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer (Masterpost)

Sonic the Hedgehog, a biodigital anomaly created from the data of his video game self, finds his home in the technologically advanced Neos City, which is operating on an augmented reality system. In a reality where Irregulars like him are seen as a danger to society, Sonic refuses to back down from protecting those he cares about, and together with Tails, Knuckles, Amy, Silver, Shadow and their human partners stands against the likes of those who want to destroy the life they created for themselves, Dr. Eggman being only one of their numerous enemies.

The Blue Blur’s thrilling adventure continues in a world outside the video game existence he is known for, but when both of these realities clash, this is where the singularity begins.

The Metal Irregular Arc (Entry 0 - Entry 3)

The Ultimate Lifeform Arc (Entry 4 - Entry 9)

The Memories of The Past Arc (Entry 10 - Entry 16)

The Enter The E.G.G.M.A.N. Arc (Entry 17 - Entry 19)

The Babylon Rogues Arc (Entry 20 - Entry 21)

The Final Haunt Arc (Entry 22 - Entry 27)

The Starfall Arc (Entry 28 - Entry 31)

The Green Hill Zone Arc (Entry 32 - Entry 37)

The Team Dark Arc (Entry 38 - Entry 46)

The Chaos Rising Arc (Entry 47 - Entry 54)

The Neo Genesis Arc (Entry 55 - Entry 62)

The Imposter Syndrome Arc (Entry 63 - Entry 68)

The Black Arms Arc (Entry 69 - Entry 78)

The Cyberspace Chaos Arc (Entry 79 - Entry 86)

Sonic Cyber Revolution (Arcs & Chapters)

Sonic Cyber Revolution (Story & Lore)

Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer

Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer is a compilation of my personal analysis of the Sonic the Hedgehog IDW comic regarding the story, characters and whatever else catches my interest.

Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer

[vintagetvstars]

Alan Alda Vs. Walter Koenig

Propaganda

Alan Alda - (M*A*S*H) - He is both the saddest wettest little meow meow and your kindly grandfather and your favourite eccentric uncle (mom's side). Somehow it works. Passionate Democrat, feminist, great writer, he and his books are hilarious. Did a cartwheel when he won an Emmy! How he met his wife is the best meet cute of the last two centuries, and they've now been married over 60 years!!!

Walter Koenig - (Star Trek, Babylon 5) - If you haven't watched him in Babylon 5 as recurring villain Alfred Bester then you are missing out! It is one of his best performances! He's such a talented actor and Babylon 5 uses him so well!

- No Negative Propaganda Please -

Master Poll List | How to submit propaganda | What is vintage? (FAQ)

Additional propaganda below the cut

Alan Alda:

he’s just so good in MASH

he put so much bisexuality into hawkeye i think it fundamentally changed me when i was little and watching mash for the first time. anyway do we all know the story about how he met his wife when they were at a party together and they were the only two people eating the cake that fell on the floor and he fell in love with her over her laugh. i just think hes neat :) i love when theres a strange looking man. also feel it necessary to say that the guy that wrote the book mash was based on wrote himself as hawkeye and HATED alda's hawkeye bc he displayed his morals too much (alda had it in his contract for the show that every episode had to have an operating room scene bc otherwise you arent backdropping the fact that war is Not fun. actually. he almost didnt take the role bc he thought a war comedy would make too much light of the horrors)

please please please use this picture of him, he's so hot in it

His comedic delivery in MASH...

The story of how he met his wife is charming and sweet, and they've now been married 65 years

Just look at him. He's the most beautiful man I've ever seen but also he's completely average. He's got a weak jawlines and a round face and these big soft eyes and he's just so beautiful. He's capable of playing a silly charismatic sitcom protagonist in one scene, and a jaded army surgeon haunted by the deaths he's witnessed in the next. He's so hot that my dad once told me he decided to apply to medical school because of how much he was attracted to Hawkeye Pierce. That's literally how I learned that my father was bisexual.

He's also just a really great dude? He's been outspoken about his political beliefs for a long time, and has always been strongly and vocally anti-war, pro-feminist, and pro lgbt. He served a tour in the Korean war, and his experiences there informed his performance in the show. He (and honestly the entire cast, but especially him) really just soared above and beyond the standard for comedies of the day.

He's so funny and his eyes are pretty

He loves and is a champion of science (Source).

Walter Koenig:

CW: Torture, blood, death

[creepzkilla]

Jahaiahaiahajajs I'm so glad your back!!!

I have an idea for you >:)=

Can I request some of your darkest headcannons for the Proxies? Like what are their toxic traits, it can sfw or nsfw or anything but the request is basically how dark and evil can they be?

I hope this makes sense and you don't have to do it, it's only of you're comfortable!

↳˳⸙;; ❝ HOW DARK ARE THE PROXIES? HC'S! ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗:

★Tumblr relies on reposting, please repost my work.★

tw. warning— mentions of self harm, mentions of aggressive actions, mentions of verbal abuse, mentions of physical abuse, mentions of sexual ordeals

[A/N]— theme change?!??? pls let me know if u guys wanna be tagged in the next post! also i wanted to do the pastas as realistic as possible… should i make a post on how the proxies + others met their lover😴 or just my general hc’s?

THE QUESTION ITSELF IS FUNNY—

the proxies are slashers— murderers. psychopathic, deranged men that are hardly short of completely and utterly insane. their sanity-if they have any- is practically none besides possibly a sliver of humanity. if anything, they aren’t even men— they were resurrected from the pits of hell itself and placed on this god forban world. the atrocities that these men have commited rightly earns them the title of not men— but demons. their sinful actions could never be erased, not even if they bathed in the waters of Babylon. the screams, cries, the sobs of their victims as they carry out their orders doing god knows what to them, will forever be ingraved into their very being. not even god can save them from their damnation— if anything god is laughing.

SANITY IS NOT SOMETHING OF LUXURY FOR THE PROXIES—

it’s something that fought for. everyday, it’s a constant battle for control—the continuous thirst to satisfy the need to kill. not to mention the the operators hold on their minds, making them carry out heinous missions consisting of nothing but death and blood. their minds are plagued with nightmares of what they have done, on repeat like a broken record, replying over and over. yet, behind the insanity, the malice, the control over their minds, they have regained just a sliver of sanity. it’s not like they want to kill—but they have to. for the operator… for this urge. little by little, they begin to feel like an actual human being. but it’s not like you know anything.

TOBY ERIN ROGERS—

is the most far gone. since the operator took over his mind at such a young age without much resistance , he has the pleasure of sculpting toby’s mind into the perfect cast. despite the most—insane, he’s the one that hangs onto his sanity the strongest. almost like he’s able to flip it on and off like a switch. yet, the line between sanity and insanity draws very thin, so he can’t help it when… it slips sometimes.

Self-Destructive Tendencies: Toby's self-destructive tendencies, which are often associated with his character, could negatively impact the relationship. This is either emotional or physically. He may engage in self-harm or reckless behaviors, disregarding the well-being of you and causing them emotional distress and constant worry.

Emotional Instability: Toby's own emotional instability could create an unpredictable and volatile environment within the relationship. His mood swings, anger outbursts, and tendency to lash out verbally or physically could cause you to constantly walk on eggshells.

Explosive Anger: Toby may have anger management issues that result in explosive outbursts. He might have difficulty controlling his temper, leading to verbal or even physical aggression toward his partner. This behavior creates an environment of fear and intimidation.

Jealousy and Insecurity: Toby might struggle with feelings of jealousy and insecurity, leading him to exhibit possessive behavior. This could manifest in him constantly questioning your actions or relationships with others, even if there is no real cause for concern.

Over-Dependency: Toby may have a tendency to become overly dependent on you, relying on you for emotional stability and validation. This can lead to an unhealthy dynamic where he becomes possessive or overly clingy, causing his partner to feel suffocated or trapped.

HOW FAR WOULD TOBY GO—

well, he certainly wouldn’t go far enough to hurt you, no, never. he is specifically always careful not to harm you, especially during sex. but that wouldn’t mean that he would hurt you emotionally or mentally. his favorite punishment is ignoring you. he’d shun you for days on end in your shared apartment, just to teach you a lesson which is very rare. physically, he treats you like a delicate glass doll that could break at any moment. during sex, it’s almost like he’s afraid to touch you. he doesn’t want to corrupt you like the way he is… he wants to preserve your innocence, and your being, and because of that, he would do anything to protect you. anyone who would ever do you wrong would soon come under his hatchet in the most painful way imaginable.

Dark and Evil level: 6/10, Moderate, just "protective"

TIMOTHY WRIGHT(MASKY)—

is in a constant fight for control, more so than the other proxies. In Marble Hornets, it is referenced that he may have Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). because of this, he comes into the separate entity known as Masky during blackouts. the operator has stalked timothy ever since he was a child and anyone else he came in contact with. the operator is setting his sights on timothy so young he can influence him just enough to do his bidding. of course, timothy hates the operator and works against him, but after so long, after all the pain and blood, he’s just too tired to fight back anymore. Masky, hates this. he hates that timothy gives up too quickly. during missions, a blackout is typically triggered, giving Masky complete control. and so soon enough Masky became tired as well. and then killing became second nature.

Controlling Behavior: Tim, overwhelmed by his own insecurities and paranoia, becomes possessive and controlling in his relationship. He constantly questions and monitors your actions, isolates them from friends and family, and exhibits manipulative behavior to maintain control.

Emotional Withdrawal: Tim, due to his secretive and guarded nature, may struggle with opening up emotionally to his significant other, that being you. He might withdraw from sharing his thoughts and feelings, leaving you feeling neglected or shut out.

Jealousy and Possessiveness: Tim's loyalty and protectiveness towards his friends, particularly towards Jay, might manifest as excessive jealousy and possessiveness in a romantic relationship. He may feel threatened by your interactions with others and attempt to control or isolate you.

Neglecting Emotional Support: Tim's own emotional struggles consume him, leaving little room for providing adequate emotional support to his partner, you. He may dismiss your concerns, minimize your feelings, or fail to offer the empathy and understanding you need, leaving you feeling unheard and invalidated.

Anger Issues: Tim/Masky occasionally displays violent and unpredictable behavior, driven by his internal struggles and external pressures. In a relationship, this volatility could lead to outbursts of anger, creating an unstable and potentially harmful environment for you

TIMOTHY AND MASKY WOULD NEVER HURT YOU—

not without reason. mentally or emotionally, timothy understands human emotions, despite not having any himself. yet, when he’s around you, everything changes. suddenly, he can feel again, suddenly, he has the strength to fight back. you are everything to him. the only good in this hell-bent world. he needs you, and he can’t let you leave him. so you can’t blame him when he starts chewing nicotine gum, “claiming to quit cigs.” you can’t blame him when he stops taking his gum out when he kisses you, “he forgets to.” you can’t blame him when suddenly all you want to do is kiss him. but it's not enough, no, no, no. he needs to make sure that your, 're addicted to him, completely and utterly infatuated with him. so, you can't blame him when he starts wearing nicotine patches, "the gum just wasn't working." you can't blame him when he starts placing the patches on you when you're sleeping next to him. you cant blame him when you practically breakdown when he leaves you, only for a few hours. you cant blame him when you feel a pinch on you arm during sex, when he stuck the nicotine patch into your arm without you seeing, saying that "oh darling its nothing." you can't blame him when you've become addicted to his presence and cock. no you don't understand, you really just can't blame him, he wants to keep you safe, really, he promises.

Dark and Evil level: 8.5/10, Very high, obsessive and insane.

BRIAN THOMAS (HOODY)—

has the most grip on reality. like tim, he has blackouts to which he comes into the separate being known as “Hoody”. also like Tim, he hates the operator. at first, he resisted, refusing to carry out those abominations; its heinous fantasies of mass destruction. except he was more willing than his counterpart, timothy. brian is calculating, he's a smart guy, he understood what would happen to him if he disobeyed the operator. the most excruciating torture that anyone has ever gone through. proxy brainwashing is no joke. he's not stupid, so that's why he's played the long game. do the operator's bidding until he's able to conjure a plan, it'll only be for a few, just until he can figure out how to get out of this hell space. soon "a few" turned into months. soon "months" turned into years. then suddenly he stopped keeping track. and then, he started to enjoy it.

Isolation and Control: Brian might isolate you from your friends and family, attempting to control who you interact with and where you go. By limiting your support networks, Brian exerts more control over their life, making it challenging for you to maintain independence and make your own decisions.

Difficulty Opening Up: Brian/Hoody's burden of guilt and emotional turmoil might make it challenging for him to open up and share his vulnerabilities. This could create a one-sided dynamic in the relationship, with you having to provide emotional support without receiving reciprocation, potentially leading to resentment and emotional imbalance.

Manipulative: brian plays on the emotions and insecurities of those around him, manipulating their feelings to further his own agenda. he understands their weaknesses and uses psychological tactics to subtly influence their actions, pushing them towards his desired outcomes.

Apathetic: Brian's apathy also masks underlying insecurities and vulnerabilities. By presenting himself as emotionally detached, he avoids exposing his true feelings and weaknesses to others. .

Emotional Unavailability: Brian/Hoody's reserved and stoic nature could make it difficult for him to express his emotions or be emotionally available in a relationship. He might struggle to communicate his feelings or provide the necessary emotional support to you, leading to a sense of distance and detachment.

BRIAN AND HOODIE ARE NEVER GONNA LET YOU GO--

you are the one thing that is keeping him sane. so don't even think about leaving him. you wouldn't get the chance anyways. your everything that he's ever wanted, there is not a chance in hell that he's gonna have you slip through his fingers. he can be mean sometimes, but he doesn't mean it, it just slips out! typically when he gets back from "work", he's aggravated, its like he's a different person. he's cold, calculating, a robot practically; so you cant blame him when he needs something to release his sexual frustration. he just loves pleasing himself inside of you, he loves the way your body reacts to his corruption. now since your body is "bound" to him, he still needs to take extra precautions to keep you from leaving... specifically, brian will pit you aganist your friends and anyone close. pointing out how your friend's remark was passive-aggressive, pointing out details on how your friends "don't care about you, how they will never care about you, how he is the only person that will ever truly care about you. of course, he leaves you at least one friend, maybe two if he's feeling generous, he doesn't want you to go insane after all.

Dark and Evil level: 7/10, Getting up there, crazy ex bf vibes

Toxic traits that all proxies/creepypasta have in my opinion:

Stalking

Manipulative

Gaslighting

Apathetic

Mean :(

Sexually all pastas have a corruption kink-- some more than others

DEEP DOWN THE PROXIES ARE STILL HUMAN--

after everything they've been through, after everything they have seen, they're just scared kids. their lives were stripped away from them at such a young age, their lives were just beginning--now its like they don't even live at all. they never wanted to do this, they never wanted to kill, they never wanted to serve an eldritch demon of mass power, they just wanted to grow up. be a kid, go to college, and have a life. maybe in a different universe, a different timeline, maybe just maybe, everything is the way it should be. maybe they arent as fucked up as they should be.

🏷️— @spookyravioli

[letterful]

If people know any portion of Herodotus, they almost certainly know the story of Croesus, the immensely rich king of the Lydians, who asked the oracles at Delphi whether he should go to war against the Persians: “The answers both oracles gave to the question were perfectly consistent with each other: they told Croesus that if he made war on the Persians, he would destroy a great empire.” Thus reassured, Croesus attacked and was utterly routed: The empire he would destroy was his own. Herodotus is a treasure chest of such stories and of what he calls thomata, or wonders. He tells us about temple prostitutes in Babylon, the Scythians’ use of cannabis to get high, fathers inadvertently feasting on the flesh of their own sons; he shows us the oases of North Africa (the Ethiopians, he says, “are the tallest and most attractive people in the world”), giant ants that bring up gold from underground, and Amazons who must first kill a man before they can marry; we even glimpse a high-born Persian who cuts off his nose and ears to accomplish a daring undercover military operation, a circumnavigation of Africa, and a foolish king so infatuated with his wife’s beauty that he insists that one of his counselors see her naked. With his usual charm, Herodotus notes that there are so many aromatic spices in Arabia that the entire country “gives off a wonderfully pleasant smell.” His book’s famous second chapter alone, a long excursus on Egypt, describes the use of mosquito netting, how to hunt a crocodile, the legend of Helen in Egypt, the building of pyramids, and three ways to embalm a corpse. After the mortuarial details, he gruesomely adds, “When the wife of an eminent man dies, or any woman who was particularly beautiful or famous, the body is not handed over to the embalmers straight away. They wait three or four days before doing so. The reason for this is to stop the embalmers having sex with the women.”

— MICHAEL DIRDA, from Bound to Please.