#or that people who take it seriously and use it to inform life decisions are whacko amd stupid

[innuendostudios]

New Alt-Right Playbook, regarding the minimization of power imbalances with "enh, it's not SO bad."

If you like this and my other work, do please back me on Patreon and/or watch me on Nebula.

Transcript below the cut.

Say, for the sake of argument, you and some other folks have gotten embroiled in a debate about the use of content warnings. One side has put forth the usual case: some people have trauma or anxiety disorders, and giving them a heads up about common triggers lets them make informed decisions about how to engage with a piece of media. They aren’t always looking to walk out, even, just to avoid a panic attack by having a few moments to prepare themselves. And this is often better for everyone as more people can appreciate the work itself and the discourse doesn’t derail into another discussion about whether it should’ve had a content warning.

And then someone from the other side of the debate says, in all seriousness (and I remind you this is about whether or not people should put a single sentence at the beginning of a video, the start of a game, outside the door of a theatre), “Can’t you just, like, have your panic attack? I mean, this isn’t life and death.”

The discussion quickly and predictably devolves from there into people who have panic attacks trying to explain how miserable they are, and how comparatively simple putting up a content warning is, and you realize far too late that this whole conversation is missing the point. Because the “it’s not life and death” crowd? They never claimed they are more inconvenienced than the person having panic attack! Content warnings ain’t life and death either! They made no attempt to frame this tradeoff as fair or justified. Only that, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not so bad.

I call this Didoing.

(Relationship Discourse would call it The Tolerable Level of Permanent Unhappiness, which is a really powerful phrase, but I came up with Didoing and I’m keeping it.)

You see Didoing everywhere. Be as gay as you want, just don’t tell your commanding officer. Be trans if you must, but pee at home. Kink is fine, but keep it out of Pride. Drag is whatever, just not in front of children. Being a woman on the internet isn’t hard if you’re willing to block seventy thousand people and just use this service to scrub all your private information from the internet so men have a harder finding your home address. It’s eleven bucks a month! What, you can’t afford eleven bucks a month??!

And, yes, all these are minimizations, and, if you want, you can point that out. You can tell them what it’s like to get a Twitter DM threatening to murder your entire family using a quote from Mission: Impossible 3. Yeah, he’s probably not gonna do it! But it can still fuck up your day; the goal is to fuck up your day. But the “it’s not life and death” crowd won’t understand, not because they don’t care, but because they don’t care enough.

But even that is letting them control the conversation. You’re trying to stress the pain of a panic attack, the anxiety of a death threat, to emphasize a gulf of iniquity between their experience, as a person who does not deal with these things, and that of someone who does. As if, were the gulf smaller, it would be not so bad. In this, you have accepted their premise. Did you even catch what the premise was? That it’s okay for things to be unfair within a certain tolerance. That some people do and should take extra precaution just to exist in the world alongside the rest of us. That it’s okay for others to suffer for the convenience of the normals. Because it’s not so bad.

This is a bit different from how privilege usually works. The issue with content warnings - really, most things people Dido over - is that, if you are a person with triggers, it means other people can provoke a panic response in you against your will. The severity of that response is, frankly, immaterial: the point is, they have power over you, and, if you’re going to operate in this world as equals, you need their word that this power will not be invoked.

The usual move for people on the privileged end of a power imbalance is to deny the imbalance exists: “white privilege is a myth,” “there is no gender wage gap,” etc. etc. You would think, the greater the imbalance, the harder it is to deny, but it’s just the opposite: people Dido when the imbalance is small (or, at least, appears small in the eyes of the Didoer). It happens with content warnings, microaggressions; “no, I don’t get followed around Macy’s like I’m gonna steal something, but is that really so important? is this life and death? don’t you have bigger problems?” (Which is a funny thing to say, because, according to white privilege: no! The bigger problems don’t exist!)

Didoing is foundational to the privileged mindset, because it’s one scenario where they will admit to the Didoee, “yes, I do have power over you… and you should just let me have it.”

[gettinshiggywithit]

!The BSD Cast With A Reader Who Has A Stalker!

Scenario:- what the bsd characters would do if their s/o had a stalker

Characters included:- dazai,chuuya,kunikida,atsushi,yosano,ranpo,akutagawa (romantic pairings) kenji,kyouka and the tanizakis(platonic pairings)

Genre:-fluff/comfort?

Tw:- mentions of bein stalked and well,a stalker,Teeny bit of cussing

W/C:-2.4k

A/N:-yes this is inspired by my real life no i will not elaborate~

↪️Osamu Dazai

If you tell dazai that you have a stalker,he’d probably joke about it at first.

But when you tell him how serious it had gotten and how stressed and scared it makes you,

He takes it way more seriously.

He obviously has a plan,our little manipulator.

And soon enough he’s threatened the stalker with an entire stack of private and compromising information.

They stop after that.and youre finally at peace.

When you thank dazai he first brushes it off as it havin been nothing at all,but ends it with a serious statement of how no one messes with the people he cares about.

As we know,the worst decision dazai’s enemies could make is making themselves his enemies.

And That stalker realized that the hard way.

↪️Chuuya Nakahara

Chuuya,unlike dazai is a little less calculated.

He has absolutely no issue with using force to make his point clear when he’s pissed(or not.) and you having to live in a constant state of fear because of this asshole is WAY more than enough to piss him off.

He finds the bastard(being a port mafia exec. Really did have its fair share of perks) and pays them a visit himself~

He comes home later that day looking rather pleased with himself and when you ask what he did,

He just says that he took care of it.

You know chuuya like the back of your hand,so you also know that he definitely has no problem with defending what matters to him,no matter what the cost.

So to protect your subconscious,you don’t question him further.

But he sees that youre a little uneasy so,he clarifies that the person isn’t dead.

Theyre just… permanently out of commission and chuuya’s slight look of annoyance tells you that he really didn’t kill the stalker.

You run into his arms and thank him and he hugs you back while pressing a chaste kiss to your lips.

You unwind with wine and dinner and enjoy your first carefree night in quite a while.

↪️Doppo Kunikida

Kunikida is outraged!

How dare these delinquents disrupt your daily life schedule like this!

He MUST do something about it.

Kunikida obviously doesn’t want it to turn into anything too confrontational(not because he wouldn’t fight for you,but because the clean up would require more energy and time than this bastard deserves)

So he calls up katai and has him dig up anything about this stalker of yours.

Soon kunikida has more than enough information to come up with the perfect plan of action.

Blackmail really isn’t his style so he goes for a little something different.

He calls up the stalker and while the bitch is scared shitless,he drops little bits of the info he’s gathered in conversation.(okay yh I lied.blackmail it is.we stan petty kunikida in this house~)

At this point he’s having a conversation with himself so he knows the stalker is definitely shaking with fear.

So he ends the call with a final statement,

“I suggest you leave y/n alone  if you know whats good for you.you wouldn’t want to ruin your entire life now would you?not that you haven’t already by sinking to the level you are already at, of course.”

And he’s met with a shakey “yes,sir…” before the line goes silent permanently.

He let you know you can stop living in fear and you two go over your next days routine.(mans had only allocated a certain amount of time to solve that entire thing okay :’))

↪️Atsushi Nakajima

Atsushi is a gentle soul,bless him,really.

But he was worried af when you told him about your stalker.

He’s determined to keep his s/o safe!

He asks ranpo for help,and is turned away(‘not botheredddd’ ßRanpo’s reply)

So he goes to dazai next.

Dazai obviously suggests blackmail.

Atsushi doesn’t wanna pull a dazai on this one.

So he just calls the number(dazai has it tapped and is using ranpo{he was bribed with candy} to track it) you’d blocked and when he gets a rude response tauting him;daring him to ‘actually do something about it’ he loses it!

Who does this asshole think he is?!

Atsushi fires back saying that he really will and when the stalker cuts the line laughing and repeating that atsushi wouldn’t do shit, he really is ready to go deal some damage.

He walks out into the main area of the ADA to see dazai sitting at his desk with a shit eating grin oh his face,a piece of paper with an address scrawled across it between his middle and pointer fingers.

“here you gooo atsuuushiiiii~~~” he says

Atsushi thanks him and takes off to take care of it.

He comes back in about 2 hours and when you ask him what he did,he simply says that he taught the asshat a lesson on respect!

You get a letter the next day from your stalker and to your surprise,it’s an apology letter which specifies that they’ll never bother you again.

You thank atsushi with a little peck to the lips and hes a complete blushing mess.

We love this fluffy puddy tat(that’s tweety for pussy cat {wan atsushi in the background :- IM A TIGER!})

↪️Ranpo Edogawa

Absolutely obliterates the stalker.

He was bored anyway and you bein in distress was definitely enough to get him to try something.

He too calls up the stalker,but instead of airing out current or recent dirty laundry , he goes straight for their most sensitive and embarrassing childhood and adolescent memories.

How he knows all of this baffles you

But such is the wonder that is ranpo edogawa.

And finally he ends his call with.

“oh and say hi to all the people I put in jail! You’ll be goin there in 3….2….1” and sure enough the police were at the stalker’s door.and they were taken away.

Your praise and thanks have ranpo beaming because as we know,he lives for the applause :”)

Serves em right for not knowing who they were messing with tbh.

↪️Ryunosuke Akutagawa

Akutagawa is peeved to say the least.

Why were such vermin even allowed to live on the same earth as him??

he definitely takes care of it.

Swiftly and elegantly might I add~

Rashoumon leaves the stalker permanently disabled once aku pays them a little visit.

What a waste of space.

He totally roasts the stalker on how useless and pathetic they are.

And finally leaves them with a last threat for initiative “leave y/n alone,or else ill come back and finish what I started.i cannot guarantee that you will survive.but it will certainly be painful.am I making myself clear?”

He’s met with a very petrified piece of shit and he finally kicks said piece of shit away from himself before leaving  swaggering away with his hands in his pockets and a bored look in his eyes.

When he arrives back at your apartment he tells you that you’ll be fine. And if they dare inconvenience you again,to let him know.

You really are grateful for your Mafioso boyfriend

↪️Akiko Yosano

Yosano is pissed

But also delighted!

She’s not delighted cos you have a stalker btw!

Shes delighted cos now she can use her ability on someone….or not ;3

Whatever it is,she gets to play mad scientist with someone she has absolutely no remorse for

Comes back home covered in blood and reassures you that she took care of it,with a shit eating(and slightly concerning ) grin on her face.

You know akiko wouldn’t have killed the stalker…but um youre not totally sure.

When you ask her she sadly says that theyre alive,but when she turns to walk away she whispers a muffles “barely” under her breath.

Either way,shes satisfied with herself~

Very slay of her tbh ;3

↪️Michizou Tachihara

Goes after em.

Buddy grabs his pistols and goes to take care of business himself!

He doesnt care abt protocol in that moment,but he also knows that mori wont give a shit cos its a personal matter

So he’s technically in the clear.

Once at the stalkers door,he knocks twice to get their attention and when her hears the sound of a hand landing on the handle,he shoots and gets em right in the hand!

And in the process of doing so,hes shot through the lock,so he kicks the door open{effortlessly} and confronts the stalker who recognises him immediately (i mean obvs)

Tachihara is a part of the port mafias elite kill squad so he’s no stranger to a messy job,but for the sake of your subconscious, he keeps it comparatively clean,shooting through the stalker’s limbs and beating the shit outta them too!

He cleans up into new clothes at gin and ryunosuke’s before comin back home to you(he knows that if you see him all bloodied up the questions will start)

And let me clarify that mans did this without your knowledge so while you’re watchin a movie that night,you do not know what he did but you find out the next day and immediately know it was him

His thank you was a little kiss on the lips that somehow managed to convey your total appreciation for him in only 3 seconds~

↪️Higuchi Ichiyou

With the way she is when it comes to akutagawa,we know that higuchi would be protective of the ones she loves

So when her s/o is bein terrorised by a stalker,you bet your ass shes gonna take action

Step one: identify the stalker

She covertly follows you around and when she sees the person you’d described to her,she begins to tail them.

When they get home she calmly and quietly walks upto their door and knocks

She then winds back her arm and waits until-

BAM the stalker is met with a face full of fist!

She then takes advantage of their confused state and tackles them to the ground

She bends one arm behind their back and when they try harder to resist,a sickening crunch and a howl of pain is let out

And now that she has their attention,she makes her threat: “leave y/n alone or else you’ll have to deal with the entirety of the port mafia next!”

Ofc this threat doesnt mean anything~

like I mentioned earlier,mori doesn’t give a shit about personal matters so theres no way anyone (else) from the pm would be knocking on ur stalkers door.

But they didnt know that~

So they beg and promise not to bother you anymore.they promise to leave you alone forever.

Higuchi knows that they’re being honest,the fear in their voice is a dead giveaway

So she gets up but then shoots two bullets On either side of the stalkers face,barely missing.

“I hope ive made myself clear” are the last words she mutters before disappearing into the night

And just like that,you were never bothered again.

↪️Yukichi Fukuzawa

President fukuzawa isnt really confrontational unless he has to be

So when you tell him that you have a stalker terrorising you,

He knows what to do

He asks ranpo to deduce the location of said stalker and withink seconds,he does

Then,fukuzawa writes a letter.

A very threatening letter

Your stalker knows all about him

Ofc they would he’s your significant other !

So when they see the letter addressed to them from fukuzawa,they are immediately intrigued

And after reading the letter,theyre fuckin FILLED with fear

They know how powerful and skilled the president of the GODDAM armed detective agency is

So they immediately decide to leave you alone

Death by katana wasnt something they wanted to experience.

So when you tell him how the stalker wasn’t bothering you anymore and how you knew he had to have done something about it,he just replied with

“All i did,

Was write a letter.”

↪️Kenji and kyouka(platonic.i aint writin romantic stuff for them yall.)

↪️Kyouka Izumi

Demon snow to the rescue.

One visit from kyouka’s ability and you’re sure to be okay for the remainder of your life.

The threat of being cut up by a katana wielding demon really does deter people from being creeps~

↪️Kenji Miyazawa

Finds them by using his many connections around town and beats em shitless.

They cant even tell which way’s up when he’s done with em.

Remember, his family motto is "If a cow defies you, strike it with something handy."

Suffice to say you were NEVER bothered by that stalker ,or any other stalker, after that!

↪️Tanizaki Naomi and Tanizaki Junichirou

You were best friends with naomi and thereby junichirou,and while their relationship weired out a lot of new people at the agency,you’d really never cared much abt it

So when you told them abt your stalker issue they were both worried.

This wasnt good for you or your mental health

So junichirou took it upon himself to take care of the situation

Naomi had you distracted the entire day with a whole day out of shopping and just FUN

Meanwhile junichirou had found the stalkers address and confronted them himself

As we all know,a pissed off junichirou is a SCARY junichirou

So you can bet the stalker tried to run

But as usual,

LIGHT SNOW TO THE RESCUEE

After the stalker thinks they’ve gotten away he appears behind them,with a gun pointed straight at their temple.

He threatens to pull the trigger (he wouldn’t)

And when the stalkers begs him not to,promising to leave you alone.

He scoffs and fires a bullet that just manages to graze their cheek.

He then lets the illusion break away as he disappears himself

After that,youre happy and you feel so FREE

You’re back to your old self again and the tanizakis fist bump to their success!

please dont repost my work here as your own on any platform all rights belong to me except that of the characters used,their right belong to their respective owners.but these stories? mine.

feedback,likes,reblogs and comments are so very appreciated tbh :’)i hope you enjoyed and ill catch ya next time!

Comments & Reblogs w/ tags >>>>>>>>>>>likes please

Taglist open for anyone interested!

[sparklecarehospital]

been reflecting on my year a bit, and i was thinking about something. i think i know what the best thing i did for myself this year was.

making cometcare public. making the ask blog.

ive had this AU stirring in my brain since 2019, ever since i got really attached to doomi during the haunted arc. one reason i went so long without revealing pollarrydoomi as a ship to readers was because doom's crush wasn't public information until late 2021.

i had kept his crush a mystery for 3 years, but revealed it after a fun experience where people figured out who it was through guessing. i'm pretty sure i did a poll about it? asking people to guess who they thought it was, and uni won the vote, meaning everyone had already figured it out.

after pollarrydoomi was revealed and i started drawing art for it and people made fanart for it, i still couldn't post any of my AU art because ally wasn't public and she and howie were in the AU. in july 2022, for the comic's birthday, i revealed ally as a character to the readers. others around the time had started to notice characters i had in pfps and i ended up telling everyone i did have pollarrydoomi ship kids, but i didn't make them public.

in november 2022, i revealed eve on toyhouse. after her reveal, i would soon reveal sly as well in december 2022 on my birthday (revealing sly as a birthday present to myself is such a funny gesture now that you guys know how important he is to me). over the next few weeks i revealed cream, frosty, and marco as well. all of the main cometkids except chem.

then one day someone out there suggested that i make an ask blog for the cometcare AU. it was such a spontaneous decision, and i didn't even really know what i was gonna do with it at first. i was just kinda messing around. but when i made the blog i realized that if i wanted this AU to be experienced in complete authenticity, i couldn't make uni cis.

so i revealed uni being trans through the blog, despite the fact i'd gone so many years without ever revealing her identity. why did i do it? there's a lot of reasons. not wanting to make her a "dad" in the AU contributed, but also i felt like it wouldn't be detrimental to the story to confirm a character being trans. it also made me (and the crew in general) a lot more comfortable being able to properly refer to uni with her actual pronouns.

making the ask blog really changed me, because finally i could share this little family and comfort story i'd built in my brain with the world and make it real and make content for it and let people consume it.

but what stopped me most of all?

i've said it many times before... but i felt like it was cringey.

i felt like making an AU with 93985893844 fankids in a ridiculous complicated polycule wasn't something a Serious content creator should do, and i was really worried the reception would be negative or people would think it was stupid or something. i did NOT expect it to become as popular as it is. the blog actually has more followers than the MAIN ASK BLOG for the canon comic. it was received SO POSITIVELY and the fact it was just kind of blows me away.

it means so much to me. being able to share the most special thing in my life with people and for people to actually like it and have fun with me and want to see it, and for me to be able to not have to follow strict professionalism about spoilers and chronological storytelling, and being able to change and add in things whenever i felt like it. it's such a freeing experience.

when i was a kid, i used to make stories and OCs and i didn't take them as seriously as i do the sparklecare reboot. this kind of turned into my entire life and career kinda, so i had to take it more seriously. but making this AU honestly just makes me feel like i'm a kid again, it makes me feel like i can have fun and literally do whatever the fuck i want without worrying what people think or if it's realistic or if it makes any sense.

i know though, that some people don't like pollarrydoomi. and i know why. whether it's because of being attached to barruni (of course, they're the canon ship and main characters, i get it) or just having discomfort with the idea of shipping doom with anyone when canonically he hasn't experienced a redemption arc... i get it. i know not everyone likes it.

and that's okay! people are entitled to having their own feelings about content. i understand it. and i've come to accept that's always going to be the case with anything i do with these characters.

but i'm still going to do this for myself. i do this because it makes me happy to just have fun and not worry about being serious all the time. it feels good, especially when it's with characters that are really really important to me.

cometcare is genuinely the most special and important thing i've ever made for myself, it's such a huge piece of my identity and it makes me who i am. and being able to make this story public and share it with people and share these things that have been in my brain for so long with others means so much to me.

that's why i think it was the best thing i've done this year. it's kind of literally changed my life to be able to talk about them. it's made me happier than i've ever been making content. i'm not just making it to entertain myself alone anymore, i'm making it to entertain others like i do with other stuff. and the fact people actually like it still is unbelievable to me.

so, i guess my outlook for next year as it comes is to continue to stop taking everything so seriously. i can tell my stories however i want to. i hope others can realize they can do this too.

please make whatever you want, whenever you what, as much as you want, even if it doesn't make sense or if it's "cringe". you will be so much happier when you realize as a creator you DON'T have to take all of this so seriously. the comic still exists and people read it even if i'm doing this. You Can Do Whatever You Want And Nobody Can Ever Stop You. the only person who can stop you is yourself when you let your inhibitions get in the way of your ability to create things for yourself.

have fun! life is too short to take everything you do seriously

[loveemagicpeace]

🍸💘Libra Season⭐️🌸

🩷Libra is all about relationships. In Libra season, we learn how to find balance within ourselves, our environment, and our relationships. This intellectual air sign helps us grasp the concept of diplomacy, teaching us how to find compromise. Throughout this Libra season, ask yourself: Am I truly listening? Can I communicate without putting the other person on the defensive? What area of my life could benefit from more balance? Libra season is an excellent time to create balance in your life or start a new partnership. Begin more moderate habits. As a Libra you are diplomatic, charming, amiable, intelligent, fair, balanced, elegant, and polite. Let the Libra season help you to expand these natural gifts.

🌙On September 29 will be a full Moon in Aries. Full Moon in Aries always proves to be an exciting one and an opportunity to feel our life’s mission and then decide how to pursue it. It has the power to teach us about our soul’s purpose and how to pursue it while living in the world with other people—each of whom has their own soul’s purpose. This Moon can help you understand your journey more deeply. The full moon in Aries marks the time when you attempt to create true balance. Aries, is all about your relationship with yourself. Aries energy can help you be very decisive and clear about what you need.

✨Sep 30 — Mercury in Virgo trine Uranus in Taurus. This aspect suggests an easy opportunity to harmonize technology or specialized information within daily life. Access to new ideas or technology should be easily grasped and immediately integrated. Sun trine Pluto- this brings intense and profound experiences. Whatever you are interested in now, you will be driven to research and investigate the inner workings to gain a complete understanding of the topic. Moon trine Venus-you will feel like you are in your element and flowing with the tides of life. Moon trine Saturn-You can rely on strong instincts and common sense to make important decisions about your home, family, and relationships.

🥂On 1 October will be Moon in Taurus Conjunct Jupiter in Taurus. Energy can be expansive, and you can focus on pursuing new opportunities and having new experiences. It is always a stable time to think about the things that mean a lot to you and what is valuable to you.

🤘🏽On 2 October- mercury opposite neptune-it can be a more confusing day, and communication can be misunderstanding. This can be great for the imagination, though you may get lost in it.

🧠On 3 October - moon will be in gemini & mercury tine pluto- more in-depth topics will come to light. This is also good for debating darker topics. Dig deeper into something you need to know more about. You will want to understand things more.

⚡️On 4 October - Mercury Enters Libra- Seeing both sides to situations, being compromising, negotiating, and mediating can be easy to do. There will be more conversations about relationships, romantic things. Maybe you will advocate more for potential partners. You may want to please people more during this time. There will be more embellished words and conversations. You will hear everything you want to hear.

⛅️On 6 October - Last Quarter Moon in Cancer. Issues that have made the foundation of something shaky can be addressed. You may need to tackle some emotional issues too. The Moon is strong in Cancer. Here we long to take care of family, keeping them safe and well.

🩵On 8 October -venus enters virgo, after a long time being in leo. Venus in Leo gave a lot of childish energy, fun, nostalgia, romance, mainly happy things. Venus in Virgo will make things more demanding or picky. Maybe during this time you will work more for yourself and your routine. Maybe you'll be more picky in love and with who u spend time with. Paying close attention to the people you care about can be something you slide into more often over the coming. You can finally start to take things a little more seriously. You will be more practical.

🌊On 10 October -Pluto will go direct in Capricorn- Pluto retrograde coming to an end means you can start to see transformations picking back up again. With Pluto nearing the end of its time in Capricorn, you may focus on finishing changes with your goals, direction, responsibilities, or structures. You will see how much you have changed during this time, how your life has changed and how deeply pluto has affected your life and what it has contributed to you. Pluto is strong in the sign of Capricorn. Which means that everything you experienced during these years is only something that made you stronger. For all Capricorn risings you will get everything you wanted - a reward. Many karmic relationships and things that started in 2012 may end. Ask yourself how you feel after everything you've been through (especially capricorn risings).

💧On 12 October mars enters scorpio-Scorpio is a passionate, intense, and deep sign, so Mars in Scorpio means your energy and drive becomes more passionate, intense, deep , the more your possessiveness will be felt, the actions will have a deeper meaning. This is a very good time to work and create things for which you feel a deep passion.

🛼On 14 October Solar Eclipse in Libra -This is the first eclipse in Libra and the Libra Solar Eclipse can be excellent for new partnerships, commitments, and compromises. You can be diplomatic and charming and strive to get everyone on the same page. It will affect the cardinal signs the most. I will talk more about this in a separate post.

🏹On 20 October- Sun in Libra Conjunct Mercury in Libra this mean that mental energy can be strong, and you can focus on new ideas and put together plans. This transit is also good for writing, talking, debating and expressing yourself in any way. Something you began 6-8 weeks ago may culminate now.

🌸On 21 October- First Quarter Moon in Capricorn There can be adjustments that need to be made over the next week with your long-term plans. Make sure you’re seeing the big picture. You may choose to get more structured. Set your goals and follow them through. It knows that true success comes from the heart. Moon trine Uranus- people are more sociable and open to interaction. This is an excellent time for dates and trying something new, such as skydiving or dancing classes.Moon conj Pluto-you may have your emotions deeply stirred by an intense encounter that brings deep rooted issues to the surface.

🍸On 22 October Mercury Enters Scorpio-Mental energy can become intense over the coming weeks, and you can throw yourself into anything that interests you. You will be more inclined to explore truth and deeper things. There will be a lot more deep conversations and stuff. The words will be sharper, truer, deeper and more painful.

Venus in Virgo Trine Jupiter in Taurus -It can be easier to get along with others, and you may benefit from someone in your life. You can enjoy time with others and may want to bring in new people. Relationships will feel more stable and beautiful.

Mercury in Scorpio Trine Saturn in Pisces -Controlling mental energy can be easier, and you can channel your mental energy into something productive. You can make great long-term plans as well.

🦂On 23 October Sun Enters Scorpio- Passion, intensity, and transformations can be elevated during Scorpio Season, and you can make beneficial transformations, share with others, and increase passion. You can also leave many things behind during this time and transform yourself through this energy. Find personal power and use this well.

💕On 25 October Moon in Pisces Conjunct Neptune in Pisces- Focusing on your goals can help you work on your long-term plans. This is also good for manifesting. You will now feel everything that is otherwise just a dream as real.

⭐️On 28 October Lunar Eclipse in Taurus⭐️ 

The Taurus Lunar Eclipse can bring the culmination of financial projects and changes that you began 1-2 years ago, and you can remove blocks to stability and security. Now the reward for which you have worked for so long will come. Taurus is a fixed sign, which means that values, views, money, relationships will be greatly changed and a completely new perspective will open. Something that you deeply appreciated before, now you won't anymore. Moon will enters Taurus -Ground yourself right now because the Lunar Eclipse can trigger strong emotional energy. Grounding yourself can help you control some of it. Mercury in Scorpio Opposite Jupiter in Taurus -Your outlook can be positive, and you likely only want to be optimistic but may have difficulty fully seeing the big picture. Try taking a step back.

🖤On 29 October Mercury in Scorpio Conjunct Mars in Scorpio -Ideas can come to you quickly, and you can get excited by what you come up with, what you learn, or what you hear. You may want to take action quickly with one of your ideas.

✨On 31 October Venus in Virgo Trine Uranus in Taurus/ Halloween -Making changes in your relationships or dealings with others can prove to be beneficial, and you can find new ways to connect. You can be more open to new people as well.

-Rebekah🌸🌙🩷

[minghaos-girl18]

Seventeen as Mafia Members

This was just for fun and it is my first post on here, so if you want to see more feel free to request and give my page a follow.

Warnings: mentions of death, brutality, and jail but nothing to deep ;)

S.Coups: The boss

For obvious reasons. He is Seventeen's scary leader for a reason. For example, in that one video of a dog only listening to him. And how he can just give the rest of Seventeen one look and they like backtrack. Boss vibes.

He knows how to handle his business and very rarely gets truly involved with any actual dirty business himself. Is very careful about who he plans to give his business to.

No one double crosses him and once you work for him, it is understood that you will always work for him.

Jeonghan:Consigliere

I think Jeonghan would be S.Coups right hand man. Him and S.Coups only make decisions together. He has almost as much weight as S.Coups himself, and no one can meet S.Coups without Jeonghan approval and Jeonghan is always present. (lovers)

Jeonghan handles everything for S.Coups, that way S.Coups doesn't show his face unless necessary. However, it is understood that if anyone came for Jeonghan for any reason S.Coups would be the one to "handle" it.

Joshua:Capo

He definitely runs his own crew. He keeps a tight hand on them. He is the type of person that you would never expect to have a hand in illegal dealings. Which is why he is so good. I feel like he also has a dark side and prefers to be the one that handles the people that cross him during business dealings.

Probably the type to live in a house about a thirty minute drive from the city (so no one heard the screams of the victims). Most of those working for him were kids he picked up off the streets- they stay the loyal.

Jun:Police

Jun is smart and I think he could handle living a double life. He is the informant for S.Coups. He reports to Jeonghan if any of the other operating mafia families are crossing into the Choi territory.

He is the chief and can make evidence "disappear" if necessary. He is one of the main reason nothing can be drawn back to S.Coups. The only time there is evidence is if Jeonghan gave specific instructions. This usually was signified by Hoshi getting the case, which usually meant the person that had been caught by police was a rat.

off topic junhui is so pretty

Wonwoo: Capo

Wonwoo also has a group of soldiers under his command. He differs from Joshua because he only steps into the dirty side of the mafia business when absolutely necessary. The group he runs consists of mostly hackers and only a selected few can even speak to Wonwoo.

Wonwoo takes his job seriously though. He works with Seungkwan to make sure there are no moles in the "business". And if there are, then that evidence will be sent to Jeonghan and after direct work with Jun and Hoshi the moles are either dead or in jail.

Wonwoo also keeps people from bugging the Choi territory sending his soldiers to do mandatory sweeps of every building owned by S.Coups. And if he finds out that they are not being done right or a bug was missed-well I feel bad for that soldier.

Hoshi: Associate

Hoshi is a part of the mafia, but he also isn't??

Hoshi does what S.Coups (or rather Jeonghan) tells him to do for the right price. Hoshi seems like a prosecutor by day, assassin by night kinda guy. Which is why he is so useful to S.Coups. As a prosecutor, Hoshi dedicates himself to putting bad people in jail (or the people S.Coups wants put in jail). And at night, he dedicates himself to making sure justice has been served.

He is seen by the public as some vigilante and due to his close work with Jun for his morning job, there is no chance of Hoshi or "The Justice" being caught.

Woozi:Underboss

Jihoon is reliable and gets his job done. His work is his life, and he is willing to do pretty much anything in order to obtain the role of Boss one day. Jihoon also knows when he can test his limits and when he shouldn't. I think S.Coups also discusses almost every aspect of his "business" with Jihoon. S.Coups knows that whenever he decides to leave the business, Jihoon will take good care of everything.

Jihoon keeps his nose clean for the most part. However, if S.Coups is busy and something big is to be handled Jeonghan is given orders to allow Jihoon to handle it.

And he does.

The8: Associate

I think Minghao handles the finances for S.Coups. That is the only tie to S.Coups he has. He also works at his own pace, and very rarely gets his hands dirty. But that doesn't mean he won't (don't try to steal from him- those martial arts skills will pulverise you )

I think like only a select few have even lived to tale the tale of what would happen if Minghao caught you trying to steal. And those few would only be kept alive just to make sure no one was dumb enough to try. Of course...there is always someone dumb enough to try.

Dk: Capo

Now hear me out on this one. He is our sunshine, but I know he would handle himself very well when it came to managing his own team

Seokmin for the most part would be a fun, loving, typical sunshine person and a great boss. However, his soldiers know not to push him, because he can be dark. He can be cold-hearted and will be if pushed to that point. He does not like it when people try to walk over him, because they think they can. And he is quick to put them in their place-verbally or physically.

Mingyu: Associate

Assassin.

Mingyu is highly sought after, but he works only for a selected few. S.Coups being one of them. Mingyu is picky and high priced with his jobs. But if given a task, he will accomplish it and depending on the request it will either be the quietest death or the most brutal.

Definitely is given another name in the papers and on the streets...something like Kuro Neko (I am pretty sure that means black cat in Japanese).

I also think Mingyu would keep this side of him well hidden. And would use his bubbly personality to get close to his targets and keep up a solid public persona. Probably runs a clothing shop with a basement full of assassin equipment.

Seungkwan: Spy

Seungkwan has an outgoing personality. He probably would have some type of traveling job on the outside. But he is usually planting some type of bug that allows S.Coups intel on people that he is suspicious of.

Seungkwan also gets invites to parties for people of high status. This allows him access and plant more bugs on celebrities without any second glances. After all who would believe someone like Seungkwan would be involved with the mafia.

Vernon: Associate

Vernon works with Seungkwan.

(lovers pt.2)

Vernon is the new bartender (or bouncer of some sort depending where Seungkwan is planting the bugs-probably is housekeeping at some point). I think Vernon has a thousand costumes his closet because he basically either gets Seungkwan in (like if Seungkwan needs into a hotel room, Vernon will play housekeeper and role Seungkwan in the housekeeping cart) or out.

Vernon knows about S.Coups and but Vernon works more for Seungkwan and prefers it that way. However, he still receives a pay out from S.Coups for his work.

Dino: Spy/Assassin

Chan has a job that combines Seungkwans and Mingyus, but for a special purpose. Chan spies on the people he aims to assassinate, and unlike Mingyu who works for a selected few, Chan works only for S.Coups.

Chan targets people whose loved ones have not repaid their debts to S.Coups. Chan gets close to them and as soon as he is given the green light (from Jeonghan or Jihoon) he assassinates them.

He either sends invites to the debts owners so that they find the body or he moves the body to a place where he knows they will find it.

He leaves a symbol to let that person know it was him-like a black rose or something.

Is will come to be known as the angel of death.

Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed this silly little writing of mine. I hope to write on here more often so follow for more :)

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen! Coming to you from the closet for an emotional rant. Recently, I started dating this woman.I'm young, 19, I'm still at home with my very conservative and unsupportive family. I know that if I come out, my whole world shifts and the negative consequences could literally put me at risk. When this woman and I first started seeing each other, I was honest about my situation and told her it wasn't safe for me to. She told me she understood and that it wasn't a deal breaker.

Now she's doesn't seem very okay with the situation. It's been about a month. I'm out to basically everyone else, friends, other family like siblings, coworkers ect, and they know about her, but I don't want my parents to know about her, period, because I'm too afraid to put us at risk. I don't feel like I don't want to break up, I seriously like this woman. She's becoming very passive aggressive about it and less understanding the more time seems to pass. Im nervous, because I don't want this to lead to a break up, but there's nothing else I can do right now. I know if it's meant to be then it'll work out, but being closeted like this makes me feel so isolated and undeserving. I just don't know how to handle it.

I realize this might be too late and I hope you made the decision to stay safe within your home and she either came around to understand or you are not together any longer.

I get where she might come from. It is a place of either life long security and support OR one where she came out and experienced a bad situation or series of events at the hands of friends and family. Her thought process might be "if I can survive it you can" (and must) too. She might believe that since her parents were fine yours will likely come around.

Being an out and happy lesbian can lead us to feel like others can be just like us if they just take a risk. It is like when we experience joy in something, want others to have that and are clouded my our comfort into thinking it works the same for everyone in every circumstance of life. We all know this is not true.

She might feel that if you really loved her you would gladly proclaim that love even to those who will react negatively.

You do not owe your safety to her. Your home, financial security, physical safety and emotional comfort IS important. Telling people who can damage any of these things is an act in futility and unnecessary. No one needs to know you are a lesbian unless you wish to share that information. If she cannot understand your well being comes first she is not a woman you want to stay with. She is willing to risk your stability for public affirmation or proof of love which means she likes the "idea" of love but does not understand what loving someone actually means.

If she is willing to listen and stand by your decision then you can work on her thoughts and such. If she continues to push and prod then please move on. You deserve to be safe.

[etrosgate]

everyone go play 999 for the nintendo ds. NOT THE PORT. the ds.

im serious about this.

9 hours 9 persons 9 doors for the nintendo ds is a masterpiece of a game, with wonderfully snappy dialogue and a quickly paced narrative that avoids many traps of visual novel writing (such as being overly obvious and repetitive) with a ludonarrative cohesion that makes SO many of its aspects initially perceived as flaws into an active strength of the experience. the endgame twist is very possibly the best in gaming history.

i think i've made it pretty clear that i really fucking love this game, and recommend it to everyone.

so

i used to say "the ds version is better, but it's fine if you play the port for its various quality of life features" but im no longer able to have that stance, now that i know the extent of how it kinda butchers its narrative. it's not super obvious, but that subtley honestly makes it worse to me.

it's the difference between a good game that had cool concepts but kinda shaky execution, and a masterpiece.

this boils down to the "novel mode" versus "adventure mode" format that they decided to build the port on.

if you choose to play in adventure mode, it removes almost all of the narration and rewrites that aforementioned incredible dialogue to awkwardly shove in some (not all) of that information, resulting in overly obvious and clunky writing that seriously drags some scenes out. the descriptive text in general is actually incredibly important in a way i can't describe, and though it will forcibly shift to novel mode to show it to you very occasionally, it's not Nearly enough and you will miss out on some of the most memorable striking moments because of it. i cannot overstate how much the impact of the ending is affected by this.

if you choose novel mode, you do get all the narration (very important). HOWEVER. the writing is still the adjusted one done to facilitate only playing adv mode, so now the dialogue is overly obvious and clunky and slow AND repetitive (all the things i said 999 very cleverly avoided 🤔?) and then, for some ungodly reason, it is actively difficult to play the game in novel mode. the game will Constantly shift you back to adv mode so you have to spend the entire game checking to make sure to switch back (something even i found difficult to do as someone who'd played the ds version).

so neither way to play the port is good. in addition to the aforementioned changing the final puzzle to be worse. and a LOT of ludonarrative things i cannot actually get into due to spoilers.

"how much of an impact could these small changes actually have?"

well this is anecdotal, but me (and many other people i know) who originally played 999 on the ds and thought it was a masterpiece, years later went on to play the port version and thought "huh. it was still good, but it's like the magic was gone. i guess it's just not as good as i remembered, one of those things that doesn't hold up to your memories of it."

and then we replayed the ds game. and found out that the game we remembered DOES still exist! it's just as fantastic, the magic IS THERE. the port just made the game worse!!

anyways, so what were those quality of life changes i mentioned earlier?

in the original ds version of 999, every time you reach an ending you have to start from the beginning of the game again, fast forwarding through the text and replaying the puzzles. (the port changed this to having a flowchart where you can just jump to decision points)

HOWEVER

as someone who Very recently replayed the ds version, i truly don't think this is as much of a pain as you might expect.

skipping text isn't a big deal. yeah it takes a bit, but it's easy to watch a youtube video or something while you're waiting the 5 minutes it takes. using an emulator, you can even speed up the text skipping to an even greater degree. if you can't physically hold down the button, you can probably find something to hold it down for you, and on an emulator you can rebind the key to be something easier to do that with (like the space bar)

redoing puzzles isn't a big deal either. not only do you still have to redo some puzzle rooms in the port version anyway, it can be pretty fun to figure out how to essentially speedrun rooms you've done before, and you don't redo them that many times (i would recommend a walkthrough anyway for deciding which endings to get, so making that redo time even shorter is a bonus).

if you really need the accessibility of voice acting, i would genuinely recommend watching an LP of the ds version instead. yes, i really do think some guy from 10 years ago reading out the text will give you a better experience than a genuinely good cast of voice actors reading the port's.

btw, if you're scared off at the prospect of reading a little more now without being able to choose adventure mode... if you've played danganronpa (and most of you did!) 999 is shorter, faster-paced, and has LESS READING.

okay im done.

i'd recommend THIS WALKTHROUGH, even if you don't want to use it for the puzzles, it'll give you good info for how to get each ending (especially recommended for true ending), and a general order to do them in. i'd recommend doing getting all the endings (except coffin, which is just the true end cut short) EDIT: thank you to tlblitz for recommending this walkthrough, which gives additional hints for the puzzles instead of just telling you solutions outright

if you've already played 999 (or are just curious about specifics), this video details all the changes mentioned here and more, and it gets all the way into spoiler territory (it can be nitpicky at points, particularly at the beginning, but maaaan did it open my eyes to everything i had subconsciously picked up on in playing the port)

EDIT

i forgot to mention. if you emulate the game, there's a visual glitch that messes up the sprites a little, but you can fix it really easily! in DeSmuME, go to Config>3D Settings and set the renderer to OpenGL

also, here's a mod that increases the text speed, if you find that bothers you.

and i figure i should put my reasons for not just tolerating, but loving the hassles that come from the ds version onto the base post (reposted from another reblog)

major major 999 spoilers below (and some vlr spoilers too)

-----------

to me, one of the coolest aspects of 999 (and zero escape in general) is how much the experience of playing it reflects the narrative

the final twist isn’t just that the text on the bottom screen has been akane, but that you’ve been playing as HER the entire game, not junpei (and with turning the ds upside down for the sudoku, you finally do so for the first time)

in the narrative, you spend basically the entire runtime getting to know her as June, but in the ludonarrative, (the actual Playing the game) you get to know her as Zero. and those annoying bits are a big part of that.

every time akane reaches her death in a timeline, she has to go back to the beginning and start over, because that’s how her powers work. she has to redo all the puzzles, has to wait through all the dialogue until she gets to a point where she can nudge junpei to another route. (in vlr, sigma+phi have a flowchart not just because it’s more convenient, but because that’s how Their powers work).

so subtly, without noticing, you start to reach her point of view. the first time you see the ninth man die it’s shocking and horrific, but even just on your second playthrough the horror doesn’t affect you much. for junpei and everyone else, these sequences are just as terrifying in every route but not for you, cause you’ve seen them before. you can’t be affected by them in the same way, what matters now is the futures you haven’t seen yet.

speedrunning puzzles by skipping the clues and zoning out while you wait for the dialogue to finish aren’t just game things, but diagetic events, of akane going through the motions of something she’s done over and over.

when i replayed the ds version recently (something i hadn’t done in a LONG time), i felt so close to akane in a way i never did in the port, because i’d been through the same experience as her. i understood how she could be such a kind and sensitive person who rationalizes away putting all these people she loves through all those the moment to moment horrors in pursuit of a timeline where she and everyone she care about lives, because i’d become detached to them through repetition too.

i completely understand why people wouldn’t enjoy that, but i’m a pretentious gamer who LOVES when mechanics are technically “worse” in a way that is characterful or thematic. so the frustrating bits of 999 add to that experience much more than they detract from it for me haha

[flowersandbigteeth]

do you have adulting adult advice for us newly adulting adults

Ummm hmmm I'm not a great role model but there are some good things to keep in mind, generally, but they are probably not particularly profound, but more pragmatic informed by some of my less than enjoyable experiences. Life comes at you fast 😭

TW: mention of domestic abuse

- opinions are cheap and people hand them out liberally. They have no idea what it's like to live as you day to day, so take them with a grain of salt, including mine!

- Don't let people rush you. Be thoughtful about your decisions. In romance, purchases, everything

- Keep a folder or binder with all of your important documents, you never know when you will have to leave a place abruptly and you want to be able to grab the important stuff quickly.

- Keep a "go bag" if you can with some useful stuff, toothpaste, travel bottles of shampoo and hair styling stuff, a brush, deodorant, some cash, tampons or pads if you use them, an outfit, etc either in your car or someplace easy to grab if you need to escape an abusive person, fire, etc.

- take a night to develop a plan in case you need to leave a job or shelter in the future. I know this sounds a little paranoid, but seriously shit happens! At least have a general idea of what you would do and who you can trust. Check what local shelters, camp grounds, motels might be available to you and their requirements and or prices.

- Jot down in a notebook all of your relationships, who you can rely on, and their phone numbers or addresses in case you need help. It's also useful to jot down the shelters or camp grounds you researched. Put it in your go bag for if you lose your phone or someone steals or breaks it. Memorize at least one phone number of someone you can rely on if you can.

- Try to brush your teeth regularly and limit super acidic drinks, dental work is very expensive even with insurance 😭

- Keep your eyes on your own plate, people and their lives are complex. You have no idea what's going on behind closed doors so don't compare your life to other people's it's a waste of your limited energy

- If you can, make a friend or two at your job that you can use as a reference who is NOT your boss, in case you need to leave the job abruptly or get fired. You can also use references from hobbies or volunteer work.

- If you can, put even as little as $10 in a savings account every paycheck, it will add up, even $100 in savings is something for an emergency (a tire, a motel room, some food, a bus ticket, etc.) If you can put a little bit of money aside it can be the difference between losing your job for an absence because you had a flat tire and not, if that makes sense. If you have more sporadic income, just put some money away wherever you can, no matter how small. I put any money I get as a gift from family into savings because it wasn't money I was even expecting to have, so I don't miss it.

- if you have a car, watch some YouTube videos on basic care. Learn how to add fluids and when to change them, and how to change them if you feel comfortable with that. Keep a full sized spare tire not the donut most cars come with if you can. Get some jumper cables and you can buy a battery charger that will jump your car without another car that you can plug in to recharge.

-if you have family that asks you what you want for Christmas ask for pragmatic stuff not treats 😅 a battery charger, a battery block charger for your phone, a warm jacket, etc.

- Sometimes you have to leave jobs abruptly for a myriad of reasons and you have to buy a new uniform (nonslip shoes or whatever) so it's good to have $50 put away for that.

- I lived in my car for awhile when I was younger, (which is why I have so much car advice, lol) so in regards to that, try to find the cheapest gym membership you can with a locker room so you can take a shower. Bonus points if it has a locker where you can store stuff. You can also find public showers at the beach if you live near one that is safe (usually during the day and during the season where the beaches are busy with families). I had a friend who lived in a campground which had a shower he could use.

- Storage units have gotten expensive, but if you can afford one, they can be useful to have if you find yourself without shelter to store your electronics and easy to steal stuff. PO boxes are around 5-10$ a month in the US to receive mail if you need that.

- If you are without shelter, be VERY careful with who you share that information with. Predators look for vulnerable people and they are really good liars.

- If you have resources to and can, get a different doctor if yours isn't taking you seriously. I went to a doc before I was diagnosed with bipolar and PTSD that literally laughed at me when I told him about my hallucinations. Fortunately, I went to a student hospital and he got swapped out with a new one when his semester ended who actually diagnosed me properly, but bad doctors exist. If they are not addressing your concerns, it's ok to "fire" them.

- I don't care what he, she, or they says, if you can, keep your own bank account even if you also have a shared one with them. Keep some money in it in case you need to leave...even if it's only for a night to go to a motel room and cool off or for a bus ticket home. Also, even if the partner is not romantic but a parent. I've had friends thrown out because someone outed them to their parents with nothing. If you can't get a bank account for whatever reason, stash cash somewhere safe and don't tell anyone.

- If you break up with someone or get kicked out change all your passwords immediately. Even if you think they don't know them, you might be logged in on other devices.

I think those were the most useful things I learned when I was younger 🤔 sorry if it's too pragmatic but the most important thing to know as a young person is that it's easier than you think to become unhoused or jobless. I grew up in the era where when you were 18 you were on your own, so I kind of internalized that you need to plan for the worst because no one is coming to save you and if they do it's a nice surprise not guaranteed 😅

There's no shame in it, either. I've been laid off because corporate decided to just close the store a few days before Christmas with 0 notice. You don't have to obsess about this stuff, just take a night and try to develop a plan to give yourself some peace of mind in the case something bad happens.

[moiyume]

death is the only end for us — chapter ii. imaginary

pairing: yandere!satoru gojo x fem!reader

sumary: Discussions about the past bring out an important revelation, [Y/N] will not surrender, she is willing to destroy everyone in her path to prove her innocence, even Satoru.

warnings: angst, threats, mentions of death, humiliation, yandere thoughts, spoilers from the main story.

word count: 2265.

more information about the history: here.

⠀⠀⠀⠀───◌┈┈───♡⃝───┈┈◌───

AND BY PLANTING MISTRUST, LOVE WILL COOL DOWN, GIVE WAY TO HATRED AND RESENTMENT. There is no way to mend a broken glass, when you put the pieces together, the cracks and scars of the breakage will be there forever, the glass will break again if you fill it with water. There is no way to mend the heart of someone who has already been betrayed or abandoned.

After ten years forced to live in ostracism you have learned that curses are not as bad as the wizards say they are. Curses are predictable, they obey the primitive instinct to kill humans and devour each other for more power, they have no filters, they are direct in what they set out to do. But people are not, people are cunning, people deceive, people betray, people change, people are not what they appear or say they are, and above all, no person can be trusted. Father, mother, brother, friend or stranger, it is the nature of human beings not to be trusted.

You have learned the hard way that you cannot trust anyone. No matter how well you think you know someone, you really don't know how much someone can change in a day, maybe even in ten years. It was a long ten years living a miserable life, hunted like an animal for slaughter across three continents, you saw and experienced many things, but nothing surprised you more than the falseness of the human being.

However, there is a proverb that says that the prey will kill the predator. In the game Gō the winner is the one who has the most pieces on the board, however it is not as simple as it seems, you need to knock down the opponent's houses if you want to ensure victory, because as in the animal kingdom there is no draw, only the strongest will prevail, the one who is able to continue living. It is a game of survival, but it is also a mental game, you beat the enemy destroying what he worked hard to build, you take his place and eliminate him. Satoru and you are adversaries in this battle. He vehemently believes that victory is his, but the foundation of the houses he plays with are as fragile as a house made on the sand of the beach, and like Gō's board, you will knock down all the pieces that hold him up.

He approaches you with a smug smile, there is no escape, it is only you on this empty hill, there are no trees you can use to hide, yet there is no way and no reason to hide when the Six Eyes search for you. You stop walking away and accept that there is no other option but to stand still, he seems pleased with your decision, the smile on his face widens. However, you will never surrender.

"I don't..." Disappointment tries to swallow your words, but you swallow your tears and face Satoru with clenched fists. "I'm not willing to give up my freedom just yet."

He takes a wrong turn with your words, to his ears they are just childish statements, but you are a human being and it is your nature to insist even when things seem impossible. The man in front of you falls into laughter and wipes away a tear that has run down the corner of his eye, it is annoying to see him mocking you, but to Satoru Gojo all people were such idiots that they were worthy of pity, and you were no exception.

"You act like you're a heroine from a light novel, that's hilarious." Satoru teases you with a smug smile on his face, you struggle to keep your cool, but a vein pops out on your forehead. "Seriously! Look at that pose! A great actress." He measures you from top to bottom. "Of our old group, you're the only one who keeps acting like a pre-teen, always wanting to prove to others that you're a martyr, it's ridiculous, don't you see?" He shoves one of his hands into his pocket and takes out a black blindfold and puts it over his eyes. "You have become such a pathetic person that it is hard to believe that you were considered a threat. Man, you killed civilians for nothing, I never understood the motives behind it, but honestly? I don't understand how we came to have anything, for a moment I even thought of you as an equal, but even Suguru did better in the villain role than you."

You are startled by those hostile words, he had never been so mean to you before, you even thought he would have some mercy for your bestie dying, but as usual you are expecting too much from Satoru Gojo. You never wanted to be a martyr, but there is some truth behind such hostility, the way you have behaved all this time as if you were being wrongly accused. Your hands have been dripping blood since the moment you were accused and the lives you took will haunt you until the day you die, but the people who died that night were not innocent and they were not civilians either, and the person who killed them was not you. You have put up with it all quietly, but this time you are determined to make a mess of it, as in gō, you will surround your enemies and let them fall alone.

"You're not entirely wrong." You admit waving your index finger towards him, mimicking his smug smile, I straighten my posture and take a step forward. "But I'm not the same girl you knew."

"Really? You still look like an idiot to me."

"Eh." You mutter amidst his debauched laughter. "The difference between the 18-year-old [Y/N] and the 28-year-old [Y/N] is: she doesn't mind crushing every ant that crosses her path."

You raise your hand towards his face and abruptly close it, making him take a step back, you laugh dryly and dullly, it's comforting to know that you're still able to mess with his head.

"Get out of my way, Gojo, before I crush you too." You threaten him, your will like a sharp sword about to slash his throat, he frowns and you step forward. "Don't tell me you don't know why no one had the courage to come to me." You watch his hesitation to give you an answer, but before he can say anything, you hold up your index finger to get him to shut up and listen, "Looks like you're the idiot here."

You place your hands together behind your body and lean forward, he is very close at this point, so you stand face to face, you feel the hesitation in his posture, his right foot goes back a step and a half before he steadies himself. You make no point of hiding your evil intentions beneath an innocent smile, the intent to kill is obvious, but it only comes from one side. Satoru may be many things, but you doubt he would kill you before he could experience the torture of the court again, he likes to play with his fangs and that would be his downfall. The moment he realises something is wrong, his hand comes towards your neck like lightning, however she is unable to touch you. The sky blue eyes shine in fury and you can't contain your laughter, it's not a genuine laughter, you just couldn't miss the moment to debauch his innocence.

"What have you done?!"

The scenery around you begins to change. The once bright and colourful landscape of the hill turns into a hostile, cold and gloomy environment, the welcoming atmosphere has become inhospitable, the peace you provided was false, as you had said earlier it is just an imaginary space. Satoru knows it is too late, however you give him the chance to move, and he approaches to attack me, but to his despair the distance between you is still the same, as if he cannot reach you, he is stuck in your trap, and you are waiting for him to place the piece on the board that will make him fall into ruins.

"What kind of cheap trick is that?!" He shouts in exaltation, unable to touch you, his steady footsteps crunch the frozen grass making an annoying creaking noise, he seems in a hurry. "What have you done to me?"

"That's not the right question, darling, try again." You reply in a playful voice and make the distance between you disappear, you grab his cheeks and lower his head so you can pull the blindfold off. "That looks really ugly on you, it makes you look like you have no forehead." You throw the piece of cloth on the ground, it's hard to believe that someone as vain as him chose to wear an accessory that would devalue his beauty so much, is that kind of thing fashionable in Japan? You would like to know.

"DAMN. [Y/N]!"

"Hm?!"

"What the hell is that?" He insists.

"You must be wondering why the Six Eyes don't recognise what's happening now, right?" He nods for you to continue explaining. "It's because you're not seeing anything, really. You taught me that for the Six Eyes to work, you need to see things around you, and okay, I know you can perceive the world on an atomic level, but I'm inside your head and not in front of you, got it? Or do you want me to draw?"

You tap your index finger on his temple and watch his eyes grow larger, it is satisfying to see him like this, for years you have kept a vow to Master Tengen not to use his true cursed technique for your own benefit, but you no longer have any connection to him, let alone the school. You cannot allow yourself to be the person who is passed over. You feel sweat drip down your hand, but it's not yours, rambling made you forget that you were still holding Satoru pinned in your hands.

"My cursed technique is called ████, by the way." You whisper, it's the first time you hesitate to tell Satoru something, you slowly back away until your hands can no longer touch him. "You must know what it means."

Satoru's skin turns as pale as paper, nostrils dilated and hairs standing on end, like an animal on alert, you would like to laugh and mock him as unassumingly as he did you, but you would not be satisfied with scaring him even more, you are not like that. You gather up a snowflake and the landscape has started to change again, this time it has started to crack, as if you were inside an old television full of static, living through a film locked in a stormy day.

Melancholy suddenly takes over you, you let out the air trapped in your lungs and watch the smoke of hot air, he's right when he says you're still a dumb teenager with childish aspirations. You turn your back and walk towards the "exit door" of the illusion you created to trap him, but before you go, you look at him over your shoulder, Satoru is staring at you with a weird look, clenched fists are at the side of his body, one leg is in front of the other as if he wants to come to you, but there is something holding him, only this time it's not you who holds him.

"When I disappear you will regain consciousness, I recommend you look around and be careful." You give him a weak smile and nod. "We will see each other again."

Satoru watches you enter a doorway of light that disappeared as soon as you stepped through it. His hands are sweaty and burning, nails are digging into his palm, blood drips down the spans of his fingers, it wasn't the first time an opponent had played a trick on him, but it's been so many since it happened he's forgotten how bad it feels to be tricked. A vein popped on his forehead and he began to laugh nervously as the word 'tricked' came to his mind, not much can be expected of you, you are clever and slippery as jelly, if he is not careful you will slip like sand or blood between his fingers.

"Bitch!" He roars exhausted and slaps his own forehead.

The space in which Satoru was trapped crumbled in a magical pass as he surged, soon the sound of horns and car tyres singing on the tarmac pierced his ears, regaining consciousness he hurriedly climbed onto the pavement. You dumped him in the middle of a busy avenue, it's your nature to play tricks on people, no matter how serious, you're the kind of childish person who would put a bucket full of water on the door to wet the first inattentive person who walked by. Drivers drove past him cursing and grumbling, but he didn't give a shit, his thoughts focused elsewhere, someone else.

- "We will see each other again" Satoru repeated and looked up at the sky, it was daylight a few minutes ago, no? He wondered if you could mess with time too and laughed bitterly, then brought his hand up to his face and covered his eyes, maybe nothing was impossible for you and Satoru resented that. "I hope so, but..." He paused before admitting to himself. "You have to pay for leaving me."

⠀⠀⠀⠀───◌┈┈───♡⃝───┈┈◌───

━ to be continued; ﹢ ⌑ ﹒

[lurkingshan]

I've been following your discussions on ephemerality vs permanence, control & voyeurism, and on that theme I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on Boston having that video of Mew and Ray. It seems odd that he'd hold on to it for two years, without their knowledge, only to use it in a power play that isn't even fully about Mew. What do you think is happening there? I feel like it has to play into the power dynamics in his relationship with Mew, the way they hold each other in apparent contempt but stick together, as well as Boston's voyeurism and how he'd delight in holding some sort of compromising secret against Mew without his knowledge, but I haven't got any fully realised thoughts about it yet, so I'd love to hear your perspective.

Hi anon, thank you for asking! I have mentioned before that it feels like we're still missing a lot of information about this friend group and their history together, so there may be some information coming to give context to this particular incident and why Boston felt the need to record it. But my current suspicion is that his decision to record and keep this was not initially that deep or sinister.

Boston is a photographer; his instinct is to document what he sees. In the very first episode, he was walking around with a camera taking pictures of the surroundings. In the second episode, after he asked Nick to pose for some photographs, we saw how serious he is about this when it was revealed that he has his own private dark room. Most student photographers would use a dark room at school (think Ink in Bad Buddy), but Boston has built his residence around his photography, indicating this is much more than a casual hobby for him. He tells Nick that he likes to have mementos of certain people and moments in his life, and he hangs on to the photo strip from his first hookup with Top (I don't think it's a coincidence that his first time with Top has a connection to his love for photography; that's a signal that this was meaningful to him).

In accordance with this interest of his, Boston is a natural voyeur and keen observer of other people. He notices everything that is happening with his friends, and he is always documenting it, even if just in his own mind. He knows about Ray's feelings for Mew; he also knows Mew does not feel the same. He knows Mew has a chip on his shoulder about his virginity. He knows Top needs to feel like an alpha. He knows Nick can be appeased with some vague weasel words and a small bit of affection. And he uses all of this information to his advantage when the need and opportunity presents itself. He seems to have little to no qualms about doing so; Boston ruthlessly pursues what he wants and he doesn't really have any sense of loyalty.

On top of that, I tend to agree with you that Boston has some kind of longstanding issue with Mew. The way he digs at Mew about his virginity is hard to miss. It might just be that Mew's self-righteousness about sex grates on him on principle, and he wants to knock him down a peg. Or it could go deeper. I have been reading it as something of an inferiority complex, given that we know Mew is also a top student. Perhaps sex is the only arena in which Boston feels superior to Mew, and so he wants him on his playing field so that he can beat him at something. When he first hooked Mew up with Top, he clearly expected Top to sleep with him once and then move on, like he did with Boston; the fact that Mew actually got Top to pursue him seriously threw Boston off and pushed him into a bit of an obsessive spiral over Top.

So, back to your question: why did he record Ray and Mew doing whatever it is they did a couple years ago? At that time, it was probably simply because he saw it, and his instinct is always to observe and document. Boston is someone who likes knowing things and keeping a record, and he always has a camera ready. I'm not sure there needs to be any deeper reason than that. I doubt he recorded it with the conscious thought that one day he would use it to humiliate or expose them, though depending on how early this issue with him and Mew and sex popped up, he may already have been thinking that Mew is a hypocrite and here was his proof. But even if that wasn't the case then, when he saw an opportunity to use Ray's feelings for Mew to his advantage in his play for Top, he pulled this up from the archives and recognized it was the perfect ammunition. And as I mentioned above, he has no qualms about using it to his advantage.

Tagging in @chickenstrangers who I know also had a lot of thoughts about Boston's photography, and @ranchthoughts @waitmyturtles in case you have anything to add on the voyeurism thread.

[hiddenfolk]

Its my son (mr capitalism)

Bio under read more

Lazuli Decarabia • Rank 7

Bloodline ability: Chandelier

The Decarabia family has the ability to create crystals. Since these crystals are made up of pure magic, they double as an incredibly effective mana source. While they have the ability to create larger crystal structures, Decarabias are mainly trained to concentrate their magic into creating high quality magic stones.

While they typically have middling to low mana pools, they take full advantage of their ability to stockpile magic in advance to perform complex spells.

Backstory:

The Decarabias are a merchant family who have built their fortune off their ability to create magic stones. Over the centuries they have become well respected in noble circles, earning a place in high society. A ruthlessly business-minded family, they've structured their entire family around it- every family member is raised with an express role to fulfil, and as soon as they can produce high quality enough crystals, they are expected to. The family is also rather hierarchical- while everyone is expected to contribute to the larger family business, individual family members are expected to pursue their own business ventures outside of it. Respect is earned through success, and family members who fail to profit may be financially cut off.

The Decarabias are also famed for their information network. They breed a rare kind of bird familiar that they use as messenger birds, able to transmit information faster than anyone else (before the advent of modern tech that is). They tend to do their familiar summoning ceremony privately and most Decarabias summon birds.

Bio:

Lazuli is the fourth of five siblings. In the hyper-competitive enviroment he was raised in, he never really found a niche, and ended up falling behind. Perhaps that influenced his decision to go into teaching rather than remain in business?

Lazuli teaches Economics, and is also the school's Careers Advisor. Since he mainly works with seniors, he mainly stays in the fifth and sixth year buildings, so juniors may not see him around too often.

Personality:

Lazuli is a consummate professional. Unflappably polite, incredibly competent and always on top of everything he needs to do. There is never a flaw in his work, a hair out of place or a crack in his armour.

Here's the thing though: that's not just what he's like when he's working. He is always like this. Lazuli lives his life according to some rather rigid standards and lives up to them flawlessly. That isn't to say he's humourless, he'll definitely join in if invited to do something, but he doesn't ever 'cut loose.' He maintains pretty much the same personality no matter what.

Lazuli also tends to take what people say completely seriously. Not in the sense that he automatically believes everything people tell him, but he will very sincerely think through what they're saying and respond accordingly.

Despite what you'd expect, Lazuli is very close to his family (or at the very least his siblings.) He takes pride in his family and will often define himself in relation to them or the family rules. ("As a Decarabia..."). Surprisingly, he's not insecure about being labeled a 'failure', according to his family's standards. He carries himself with an unshakable dignity; since he takes pride in who and what he is, his composure will not shatter from others trying to bring him down.

Trivia:

•It's a family tradition to completely drain all your magic into crystals before sleeping. This brutal regimen ends up increasing their overall mp.

•The colour of their crystals actually corresponds to their main elemental affinity! Lazuli's is water.

•He joined Babyls at the same time as Aion, and the two are incredibly (platonically) close. They tend to nap together a lot.

•Speaking of sleeping arrangements: Lazuli's bed is more like a burrow. It is covered in blankets and covers, so many that he cannot be seen once he's in there. This is less comfortable than it sounds, because Lazuli is hoarding a lot of crystals under there.

•His eyes display asterism.

Likes:

•Money (he will tell you this 100% sincerely. 0 irony.)

[stoopid-turtle]

made-up mbti types for dd and gg

So the GQ event that dd attended recently (you know, the one with the love hat) was supposedly gonna share his MBTI type with us. I don't think they ever did, probably because dd just didn't do the test thing. I'm not surprised we never got to see his mbti type, but I did have my own guess as to what he'd score, so I figured I'd share here.

(As a note, MBTI is pretty much junk science but it's fun. Just don't take it too seriously. I used to be really into it in a fannish sense and it's the closest I get to woo-stuff. If you don't know what MBTI is, here have fun.)

Cut to the chase: I'd guess dd is ISFP. My reasoning below the cut.

Introvert - The best way I've found to describe the difference is that introverts recharge by being alone. That is, a weekend full of social engagements is something they need some alone-time after. For an extrovert, social events, themselves, recharge them. Being alone is what's exhausting and what they try to avoid.

DD's probably rarely fully alone, given his busy schedule and the life of a celebrity. But introverts have ways to introverting, even among a bunch of people. I think sometimes people conflate "introvert" to mean "shy", but they're not the same. I don't think dd is particularly shy. It's just all about where your energy comes from.

Sensing - This one is about how you process information.

As an illustration, my bff and I were on a road trip once. She's the type who liked to literally pull over a smell the freaking flowers. And she could name every single flower/plant/tree she came across. Her eye for detail and ability to describe things with precision is always boggling to me, because to me, the most I can say is something like "It was sunny and the trees are green". Very vague. All about the overall impression rather than the details.

In MBTI terms, my bff would be Sensing while I'm Intuition (this is the N. Just go with it). Intuition folks are thought of as the big picture, abstract thinkers while Sensing is about the details and about the Facts of the World.

I mentioned before that dd strikes me as a pretty literal thinker, and that type of thinking overlaps with Sensing more than Intuition.

Feeling - People get confused by this one. It's not about whether the person expresses emotions or anything like that. It's about decision-making. When making a choice, does this person weigh the pros and cons? Try to come to a reasonable and sound decision? Or do they go by gut, following their emotions like animes tell them to?

This is hard to assess because we don't know much about how dd goes about making the decisions he makes. We don't know what went into his decision to go into idol training, say, or why he put his hat in the ring for The Untamed.

I'm making a guess that he's more driven by emotion than thinking. This isn't to say he acts blindly without any thought or that he never makes rational decisions, but he weighs his feelings highly. He'll pursue a gay romantic relationship with another celebrity, despite the risks, because he's in love and, you know, he follows his heart. His decision to submit his headshot for The Untamed, especially, strikes me as being Feeling-driven. Given his career at the time, acting in a BL adaptation was off the beaten path and risky. He lost fans because of it.

I think both gg and dd make a feelings-based decision to drop candies for turtles. There's no rational business case to do so. It's simply because they value having a group of fans who recognize them as a couple and they want to keep those fans with them.

Perceiving - This one's about how you plan or organize your time (or don't).

Judgers are the type to have a planner with a set schedule a routine. They have trouble adapting when their schedule gets disrupted. Perceivers are more go with the flow, able to take things as they come. When taking vacays, they would rather not have a packed itinerary bc they want the freedom to go where the moment takes them.

This is also something I don't feel I have a lot of insight on. DD's schedule is heavily managed and heavily packed, and he spends most of his time diligently following along with that schedule. That's part of his job, though. On his own, would he be inclined to keep to a schedule? I kinda don't think so.

I'm just going based on his...um...general chaotic energy. That and his tendency to do his KPI social media posts all at the last minute. Classic Perceiver move.

***

So, ISFP. In truth, each of these traits is a spectrum and people show examples all along the different traits at different times (for instance, dd's decision-making in SDC is typically strategic rather than based on feelings). Most things are based on context. But this feels right to me, overall.

For gg, I haven't watched near as much of him as I have of dd, but a guess would be INFJ.

Feel free to share your own ideas. Or squee about the love hat. Whatever. 🐢🐢🐢

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

I can’t won’t take army seriously cause it’s a rinse and repeat thing to try and discredit JM and the smeraldo marching band for their work. Rm said something and i don’t think it even brought changes in Face, cause has we have seen it the lyrics written by JM in all positions on that sofa, most of them if not all made it. His melody made it.

I was so in awe of JM process, the way that the producers let him guide them., and take everything he said at heart. All the little input of how he want the track to sound. What to add. I remember once about Lie he said he is someone who can really write about his life experiences and i am so grateful that i witness it. I am extremely happy he went with producers in house after the documentary i don’t think anyone would have work so well with him and understand him well enough and his creativity to give us face as it is. It’s a good album and it’s his first one, i can’t wait to see where he goes next.

Do you think after seeing this creative side of him, when the group get back together they will let him have some input on wtv the group does next: like melody?lyrics?creativity?

Their working process was interesting to witness because they took into consideration every idea Jimin had and they stored it in case it could be of help later. Or they would play with the keyboards and something would come up. It really was like music camp or a months long retreat in which they all channelled their eforts and creativity towards making that album. The producers were also people that knew Jimin beforehand and they worked together for BTS songs and that familiarity must have helped a lot. It was a working relationship but also friendship there.

As to your question, it's not like Jimin didn't have any prior contributions to their concepts and especially melodies, but it's not something that was really highlighted coming from the group. There's always been this thing that the rap line is the more creative one, whereas the vocal line mostly executes and sings, with some changes over time. But just think of the bridges in some BTS songs or some melodies that turned out to be known and appreciated by the fandom and in kpop in general that came from Jimin. Like I said, it's not a secret, but I for one had to find out from their book in 2023 of JM's involvement in Idol and how his decision influenced the changes in the song. Or how after working on Black Swan and that concept, he wanted to go more in that artistic direction with BTS. The information is out there, but it's not common fandom knowledge on a larger scale. And Jimin is also not the type of person to bring up such stuff on his own.

[kinardscoffee]

But what if Chris just breaks? He just sobs over Buck's body, and no one knows what to do?

And a nurse whispers to Eddie, "Is that his son?"

And Eddie just nods. Because, yes, that is Buck's son. The Diaz boys are his found family, and it's in that moment that Eddie realizes his feelings for Buck just might run a little deeper than friendship.

I think he'll have discussions with various people about this feeling. Not necessarily saying that it's Buck, but he'll definitely want opinions.

Maybe that leads to these "dates."

Also, remember in Season 2 when that girl got her head stuck in the tailpipe and all the girls thought Buck and Eddie were hot?

Eddie said that they weren't his type. Honestly, I get it. They were clearly way too immature for him, but also, he could have said, "sorry, I'm married."

But he didn't.

And sure, maybe he didn't want people to know, but it would definitely be a valid excuse.

Also, Eddie mentions in one episode (it's late, and I can't remember when, lol) something about how he wasn't ready to get married or have a kid. He was in the military, and we don't know for how long, but I can totally see Eddie's dad saying that you marry someone if they get pregnant. Period.

We've heard references from Eddie that his dad was always saying things like, "Man up!" Or "don't be too soft."

A kid living with this his entire life would naturally want a job where he would both 1, seem manly and tough, and 2, create a safe distance between them. His dad wasn't around much so in Eddie's mind, being a "man" means having a wife, having kids, owning a house, and ultimately working your life away for those things.

I can't imagine how scared little Eddie might have felt knowing he was attracted to both men and women. Knowing he actually enjoyed cooking. Playing video games. Watching Soap Operas.

All of those things he does now.

And isn't it odd we barely saw Eddie kiss Shannon or Ana? He didn't even kiss Shannon or hold her when she died. He was upset, absolutely. I do believe he loved her. But he wasn't in love with her. He tries to make it work for Chris and the potential new baby.

Then there's Buck.

Who I honestly believe is Pansexual. Falling for the person is so Buck it's unreal. Notice he doesn't really approach Taylor in a flirtatious way until he believes she withheld the information about Bobby. As soon as he realized it wasn't her choice and she would have ran it, he shuts down pretty quick.

He clearly finds Eddie attractive. He basically said so when Maddie thought Chimney was cute, and Buck assumed she meant Eddie.

Then there's also that poker night with Maddie, Josh, Chimney, and Buck. Josh mentions that he thought Maddie was trying to set him up with Buck. Buck never says anything to have us believe that he wouldn't date a man. And Josh is an out gay man. Gay men know... they just do.

There's the situation where Buck loses Chris during the tsunami, and he's so upset. Not just because he lost Chris but also because he fears that Eddie will hate him. Buck calls Maddie absolutely devastated because he can't tell Eddie that he failed. And I think that this is an important moment becausee Buck has done things to upset multiple people, and he has never been afraid of the consequences. Only when it comes to Eddie does he panic.

I honestly don't know where I was going with this but in all seriousness, if they weren't always going for Buddie to happen in canon, they've been making some really crazy decisions when writing and filming. Like, I've watched a lot of shows that have close guy friends and their relationship dynamic is just completely fucking different than what 911 is doing.

So, take your own advice 911 writers, and man the hell up!

Give us Buddie or stop writing a fanfic slowburn. Your stan is showing.

[kslenvs3000w24]

The Last and Final Blog

Over my past 4 years here at the University of Guelph, the environment has been at the center of my focus. Immersed in this for 1460 days has truly shaped me into who I am as a person and defined what my ethics and values are. For every job I applied to, the question I always got asked was, Why is this something you want to pursue? My answer is always the same; By being a student who is immersed in this knowledge and knows the complexities of the environment down the molecular level, I feel that it is my moral duty to relay this information and educate others. As an interpreter, my personal ethics encourages me to help educate people on ways they can learn about their impacts and how to help. It is important to look back on the daily decisions you make to see how you are either contributing or helping the environment. Some situations can be exempted. For example, they say you should buy electric cars, however, CTV News reported that the average price for an EV vehicle has reached 73,000$ (Bickis, 2023). When the price of a car is this high, you cannot blame individuals for using their gas cars to get to work so they can put food on the table for their families. Understanding that not everyone is as privileged to live a fully eco life is one step closer to stopping the blame and a step in the right direction for education on how you can become environmentally friendly with your living status. Being taught about the imbalances in the environment as a result of human disturbances and the effects they can have is very scary. Constant exposure to this kind of content every day can seriously impact your thoughts and beliefs about life and the world. In my case, it became very motivating. It drives me to want to help educate others and contribute to organizations that are focusing on the preservation and conservation of our earth. 

This course has been a very pivotal experience for me. Although I love taking courses about the environment which includes biology and chemistry, this course forced me to look beyond just these numbers and the analytical lens. It forced me to think more intuitively regarding interpretation and environmental science. Understanding the needs of our earth and how much we impact it starts with admitting to yourself that there is a problem whether created by you or someone else, and that it needs to be addressed. Today, there has been lots of greenwashing which tends to turn people away from wanting to advocate for the Earth. There is such a divide between the general public knowledge and students/scientists. I can't tell you how many people have said to me “Oh, so you want to save the Turtles” when I told them I was in environmental science. This statement right here goes to show the lack of understanding between preservation and protecting the planet. Environmental science falls under a huge umbrella. It encompasses so much that goes beyond just implementing reusable or compostable straws. 

When I have conversations with people who are out of touch with reality, I feel nothing but sad for them. That they are not as fortunate to know what I know or that their motivations might be driven by something else. But I cannot blame them, knowledge is power but it's also money. I believe it is my right as someone who holds this kind of knowledge, to help people understand and become engaged and involved with the environment. However, I do also believe as people of this earth, it affects us all, and doesn't matter what your social status, race, gender, etc. is, it is something we should all be working towards understanding. Let's just put it this way, a hurricane doesn't care if you're a billionaire with a nice house. Beck et al. (2018) state that there are immense educational benefits associated with acquiring knowledge that can result in “an enjoyable and enriching experience” encouraging a more meaningful relationship with the topic of interest. It doesn’t matter who you are, you will be affected directly or indirectly and therefore I believe we all have an innate calling to preserve and protect the earth not only for us but for the generations to come.

Nature has been a huge component of my life whether it was in the classroom or my own personal outlet. I was taught from a very young age to appreciate nature in all its glory. Over the years I have become increasingly empathetic towards the environment. When I read about things in the news I can’t feel anything but sad. It's so disheartening seeing our earth become hurt and have to constantly rebuild itself. I constantly ask myself when. When will we learn? How long does it take for us to make a change? What brutal disasters need to keep happening for us to stop? Going back to first-year environmental science, we talked about nature having intrinsic value and I couldn’t agree with this statement more. Just like we learned in this course, even if we do not gain any materialistic value from nature and it does not directly or indirectly benefit us, it still has a purpose and is still valuable on its own (Rea & Munns., 2017). Many people are motivated based on economic return and unfortunately, the environment is at the centre of those decisions. The understanding of intrinsic value is based on an ecocentric standpoint which is developed from having a serious concern for the environment, something many people lack (Rea & Munns., 2017). This concern can come from upbringing and experience that shape how one views the world. For people who are struggling to put food on the table, the state of the environment is not typically their biggest problem. Effective interpretation as described by Beck et al., (2018) involves building new knowledge, values, and beliefs. Being open-minded to adopting new concepts can truly work wonders.

Finally, I feel it's my responsibility as an interpreter to educate. Social media is a very powerful tool in today's age and being able to raise awareness about situations regarding climate issues is a great way to expose the general public. I just hope we can create a sense of unity when it comes to caring for our planet and that it gets the attention it deserves because we only have 1, but 1 is enough if we do it right! 

Thanks, everyone for a great semester I enjoyed reading all your blogs! 

Beck, L., Cable, T. T., & Knudson, D. M. (2018). Interpreting cultural and natural heritage: For A Better World. SAGAMORE Publishing, (pp. 42). 

Beck, L., Cable, T. T., & Knudson, D. M. (2018). Interpreting cultural and natural heritage: For A Better World. SAGAMORE Publishing, (pp. 91). 

Bickis, I. (2023, October 22). EVs are getting easier to find -- but with price tags out of reach for many Canadians. CTVNews. https://www.ctvnews.ca/autos/evs-are-getting-easier-to-find-but-with-price-tags-out-of-reach-for-many-canadians-1.6612044 

Rea, A. W., & Munns, W. R. (2017). The value of nature: Economic, intrinsic, or both? Integrated Environmental Assessment and Management, 13(5), 953–955. https://doi.org/10.1002/ieam.1924

[inlocusmads]

second languages ~ trystan thorne (crimes of passion) > part 2

series summary: How Trystan forgets his mother tongue - the trials and tribulations, the consequences and the guilt that follows and how he struggles to learn it back again.

chapter 2: "I will not ask you where you came from" chapter summary: trystan says he cares, but who is willing to take them seriously?

wc: 2.2k | teen and up for strong language

read it on ao3 here

title from 'like real people do' by hozier

Trystan woke up, cold sweat running down the back of his neck. It was four in the morning. His translator, Leon, slept soundly next to him. 

He wrote a note for him and stuck it to his fridge, before taking a leave. Leon worked with him for a speech he delivered at the Drakovian Embassy for the unveiling of the newly established library, housing an extensive collection of literature from his home. Everyone, however, was more puzzled by the fact Trystan had a Drakovian-language translator and chose to speak in English instead. A personal choice, some had excused him. The wound from his exile two years ago had left a scar across his tongue. The people at the embassy were defensive, knowing it wasn’t wise to question his decision since he bore a surname that struck fear into their spines. 

Leon was appointed because he was an intern. Disposable. He could understand English, but only be able to speak Drakovian and some Croatian thanks to some of its similarities. Leon was an anomaly, he believed. Neither here, nor there. Half American on his mother’s side and half Drakovian on his father’s. 

It was his first speech translator job and first time speaking next to a podium because that was all he could dream of. He used his economics degree in the morning while learning a third language at night. He’d admitted how difficult it was for him and the pure joy that came from understanding two sentences, hoping to get to three sentences one day. People like him were well-versed with how different words communicated different ideas. It didn’t occur to Trystan until Leon gave him a warning.

“The unveiling of the new library will let our culture and literature reach more people without any barriers.” he’d said.

Leon translated it into a worrying, “The unveiling of the library will let people use our culture and literature with no restrictions.”

Listening to someone speak his native language was like a lifeless heart being carefully brought back to life in a surgery; being nurtured into remembering its old functions. Trystan missed it; fully anticipating he would die on the operating table so much, the actual solution didn’t give him any sense of optimism.  

He wrote a note to Leon. Trystan said he was sorry he had to leave early. He added he had a good time and offered him hope of maybe doing something like this later.

 It was oddly cruel given that Leon processed English completely differently. He would read a sentence, translate its meaning - the crux of it into his native language and try his best to explain it the same to himself. Trystan's note would give him the wrong impression because offering someone the optimism of a second time in the bluntest possible manner would  squander any such hope. That and Trystan didn't provide him any helpful information.

English was blunt in a way that it required too many words to make a point. 

Trystan's note on the Post-It read: Thanks. Sorry, I have to go. Hope we can talk soon - Trystan.

It didn't matter how genuine Trystan made it sound like, Leon would never quite register it the same way. Language barriers. One born and brought up on the bridge between two languages would clearly be able to distinguish the dissimilarities and unite the commonalities. One born and brought up on one end, only to cross over to the other and burn the bridge entirely would have a very narrow field of view. That is, until the fire and smoke cleared out. 

Trystan didn't have a means of transport to get home. He decided to walk for a bit, with his Maps on. He passed by some early-risers, joggers and a couple of 24 hour shops. The street was empty but well-lit. Few sparse cars went around the perimeter all night long. He kept a lookout for yellow taxis, double and triple checking his wallet. He should be okay. He'd grabbed one of Leon's baseball caps, figuring he wouldn't miss it and tied his scarf tightly around his face and neck. A precaution. Mags would be livid at his behaviour. She'd been quite overprotective, almost taking all the blame for the words he'd said and the things he'd done. 

Mostly the words.

Trystan had quickly learned in his two years that the American tabloids cared too much about his words. Opinions took the front page, with an exhausting amount spent clipping the context off of the quotations. Trystan had also quickly learned that he was to his native language as an editor was to their carefully doctored-up tabloid write up. He couldn't fully grasp the English language as well as Mags did; it seemed as though it differed entirely from place to place. At the same time, he'd lost touch with his native tongue. He'd purposefully ensured it. He was in an awful grey area where a language was only as good as its translation. That it had to draw out its own blood to be fed in with something else's sustenance. 

Trystan spotted a newspaper stand near the window of a shop. He picked it up and flipped it to the International News section.

Something about a groundbreaking heart transplant in Korea, football games in Europe, so on and so forth - nothing about his home. It was odd. They usually made it at least once on the paper every Monday. One could suggest Trystan look up actual Drakovian newspapers, but what was the point in trying to show concern for his homeland when he could barely understand their language anymore? He'd assumed they'd print his library inauguration but it didn't even get a passable mention. However, Trystan knew it would be on every newspaper, every magazine and every television channel back at home. He couldn't bring himself to read it. It had the genuinity of a half-hearted nurse at a maternity ward. You couldn't do that with the lofty responsibility of bringing a new life into the world. 

Finally he found a taxi. He made Trystan feel comfortable by addressing him as a friend. A couple of introductions. Hello. Hello. Long day? Certainly. I hope you aren't drunk, my friend; you're cleaning if you vomit. I won't, just a late night out. 

Then there was silence in the sense the driver chatted away and Trystan listened. The driver questioned whether he spoke in a formal, artificial tone because he came from FIDI or the reason why he lived there was that he could speak in a formal, artificial voice. Trystan was certain the driver wasn't sober to begin with, steered the conversation away to how he had a friend and was showing them around Manhattan. Drivers got very chatty about the roads they'd travelled, but unfortunately he was an outlier. Jake was more keen on talking about where he grew up. 

Streetspeak was quite popular in cities back home. Things moved a lot quicker compared to other provinces. Phrases such as “as fast as the next generation is born” (to say something is extremely slow) and “the sooner it takes for you to find your family, the better” (to say something is impossibly slow, it ceases to exist) were not uncommon. Same with “you speak like you're from the south of the city” (the south of Drakkos was home to many foreign embassies and neighbourhoods who usually took longer to make a point and usually talked your ear off). It wasn't too far off from the things he heard in New York. 

“Do you miss it?”

“Nah.” Jake answered. “I come from around here, y'know? You're just - sick of it, you don't miss it.”

Trystan had half a mind to ask him if he was from the south of the city. “What do you miss then?”

“I'd think -- the people. Hated all of them, but - I grew up in a good neighbourhood. The people make up the whole - thing, yeah? At the end of the day, you hate them, but if not them, then who? They get you, they know what you speak - right? And they say no, because they are little shits and also because it's like uh - an affirmation. They understand you, but don't want to do anything about it. You've ever seen - y'know, strangers tell you no?”

“Usually they say fuck you before they say no or yes.”

Jake erupted into laughter. “The - uh - fuck you is embedded in that no, y'know? Encrusted into it like a sandwich. Your people wouldn't have to bother with fuck you, because - you know, they get you. Right? You get me?”

Trystan hummed in agreement. “It is really intimate when someone punches you in the eye.”

“Nah, you're not getting it. It isn't -- pain from pleasu- no pleasure from pain, yeah, it isn't that, you just - you don't have a lot of people to hate for a good reason. I hate my folks because they're the only ones who get me at the end. I hate them so fucking much I'd talk about - y'know all the kid stories I can think of and I - I don't know why I do that. And it's funny, cuz - you're just attracted to the same kind of people even though you know that you hate them.”

Trystan wanted to call bullshit. Luckily Jake anticipated that from a mile away. 

“Think about it like this. Would you punch me or your mother?”

“My mother's dead.”

“All right, we'll assume she's alive. Me or your mom? Got to pick one.”

“You. I mean - it's my mom-”

“I don't punch back. Your mom's punching you back. Who are you picking? She's calling you a bunch of different names. Y'know, stuff that hurts - cuts through you like a razor blade. Do you punch her and shut her up?”

“I don't think I would.”

“See - man, that's exactly what I'm trying to say. Your mother could call you a million things and you'd still go back to her. Not because she's your mother but because you've got this -- unique weakness for her words. If she isn't going to call you a fucking idiot and get away with it, who will? It's -- like a thing I read in a paper somewhere. The words stick even if the people don't. Now you get why I talk about it?”

The taxi stopped in front of their apartment. Trystan got out, paid some wads of cash and thanked the driver for the conversation, even though he fully couldn’t understand it.

 It’s the stuff of dreams, right? Get to a different city, wipe your tongue out and start a new life. Talk to a taxi driver about life and fuck your speech translator. All temporary stuff, of course, so you can’t get tied down and have a therapist tell you to “commit” to something. Start an arts and crafts project. Write books about your struggle when you willfully succumbed to it instead. Cut your family off as if somehow that would make things better, even though it would never. Attempt to build your own family out of bribery and bloodshed when really it is a ‘social circle’. Deep down Trystan knew the taxi driver, Jake was right. No matter where they scavenged off to, which piece of carrion they tore the flesh out of, they’d always eat from their mother’s hand.

Of course Trystan couldn’t fully understand it. 

Lydea phoned him even before he could head into the elevator.

“They aren’t pleased.” she spoke in hurried Drakovian, as if merely establishing contact with her older brother was sacrilegious.”- that you’re still involved in Embassy work.”

“But I thought the Queen gave her word.”

“Mother might. The rest others are unhappy. Vasili was supposed to do the speech instead of you. He was caught up so they planned on sending Astrid because she was around.”

“I take it she is as caught up as him?”

“We were thinking of flying in some council members, but the Embassy contacted you. Said it was urgent, they had to do it at the last minute.”

“Why aren’t they questioning the Ambassador?”

Lydea answered too quickly. “You’re easy to blame.”

“How is that fair?”

“You aren’t here, Trystan. Of course Mother will turn her back on you when the family puts pressure on her to pick sides. You are not in a position to.”

“So I am supposed to just sit back and watch the coup happen? Against me?”

“You should be grateful I am letting you participate. I must go. So do your own thing. Whatever the Americans seem to do in a way that doesn’t anger them as well.”

“Do my own thing? The fuck you mean ‘do my own thing’? It is - it’s my home, Lydea! Look - we have the same objectives - focus on the bigger picture, yes? Right? We have seen the uglier sides. We know there is more to it than my involvement that somehow riles everybody up- we care, Lydea. We do.”

They could hear her chuckle on the other end. “If I were you, I would be grateful. They didn’t send you to a big city for you to show you still care.”

“I care! I do!”

“If you did care, you wouldn’t have needed a translator to make your message. Hopefully you do care soon enough than it takes for you to find your family.”

____

A/N: Thank you for reading!

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