#part of Attempt Number 1 was salvaged and shoved into this one

[lurking-loaf]

Oh wow! Look! It’s really Sun!

[spencersawkward]

switchblade faith // spencer reid - chapter 2

summary: one month after joining the BAU, Clea is still settling in. between solving murders and getting acclimated to DC, the only comfortable thing in her life is her friendship with Dr. Spencer Reid.

word count: 3.5k

masterlist

Richard Slessman's bedroom looks like something straight out of a serial killer documentary. floral wallpaper taunts Morgan and I as we walk inside. a model airplane hangs above his bed; cheap medals-- the kind kids get for participation-- decorate the area above his desk, which is littered with books about forensics. there's a carousel of CDs, too.

"whoa." is my brilliant analysis.

"we should have Garcia check out this guy's laptop." Morgan starts to wander around the room, trying to piece together Slessman's head just by examining his things. a group of cops are already huddled at the table with the laptop open, and I realize too late what they're doing.

"log in password." one of them plucks a post-it off the screen, starts to type it in.

"wait, wait--" Morgan and I nearly lunge toward them, but the crackling sound of a fizzing motherboard tells me we're too late. the screen goes black.

"it's not turning back on." Genius #1 observes. Morgan sighs and squeezes his eyes shut in frustration.

"yeah, and it won't. it's a false password."

the cops stare up at us blankly.

"it triggers a complete shut down of his system." I clarify. they share a look, deservedly feeling stupid. I want to roll my eyes, but Morgan's told me that the police on these cases get defensive most of the time; they don't like us on their turf. one glance from my partner, though, and those guys flee the room without another word.

I pull out my phone and dial Garcia's number in the hopes that she can salvage whatever's left of this asshole's computer. we arrested him an hour ago and we can only hold him with probable cause because we don't have any charges yet. this house search could be our only chance to get him in custody.

"well hello, my fresh-faced beauty queen." Penelope answers on the second ring. a slight smile turns up the corners of my mouth.

"hi, Penelope." I watch Derek plugging something into the laptop, then opening another monitor next to it. "listen, Morgan's trying to set up Richard Slessman's computer and I was wondering if you'd be able to hack into it."

"oh, kitten," she sighs contentedly. "that's my bread and butter."

"great. I'm putting you on speaker." I press a button and wait for Morgan to talk. he's typing furiously until a tab pops up with the words "Deadbolt Defense" in bold above a box for a password.

"what's the six at the bottom of the screen mean?" I ask.

"remaining password attempts until it wipes the hard drive." Morgan replies. shit.

"Penelope, there might be a journal or document or something that tells us where Heather is." I inform her.

"what system are we talking?" she asks.

"Deadbolt Defense?"

"Deadbolt is the number one crack-resistant software out there, hon. you're gonna need to get inside this guy's head for the password."

my heart sinks. when my colleague double takes, it makes me think that this is a rare occurrence.

"babygirl, are you serious?" Morgan complains. my shoulders droop. Penelope has been nothing short of genius since I got here. slicing through sealed files and unfurling secret criminal records is always ridiculously easy for her.

"sorry, handsome."

"thanks anyway." I hang up and shove my phone into my back pocket. "so... what now?"

"now," Morgan takes another look around the room. "we get creative."

...

somehow, I wind up in the attic. I don't really know how this happens, seeing as I started by flipping through discs in Slessman's weird quasi-childlike bedroom, but it's certainly an interesting space. Christmas lights are strung about, along with some shawl-like material that drapes raw ceiling.

the laptop sits in front of me, password cursor blinking mockingly while I sit in the chair. my head is aching. despite having the unit go through every single one of the CDs in search of the most-played one (hoping it'll crack the password), there's been nothing.

at least there have been other successes since we got here: we know that Slessman isn't operating on his own. he's the submissive in a partnership with Timothy Vogel, a prison guard where he was incarcerated a while back. the problem is that Vogel was onto us and fled to the kidnapping site, which we can't find. I feel useless sitting here with nothing to offer.

I consider going back downstairs and perusing the room again when I hear footsteps on the stairs. Reid's head pops into the room, spinning a bent paper clip between his fingers.

"hey." I greet curiously.

"I've been thinking about the CDs." he responds, walking over to me. I rub the heels of my hands against my eyes.

"we tried it, Reid. there's nothing there," I slam my back to the cushions with an exasperated groan. "if we don't find something, this girl is dead."

instead of replying, Reid bends down next to the laptop in front of me, squinting at the DVD slot in the side. he pokes the end of his bent paper clip into the small opening.

"I think we may have missed the obvious." he murmurs, working diligently. I scowl.

"what do you--?" in response to my question, the DVD slot pops open and out slides a copy of a Metallica CD. Reid and I look at each other with wide eyes before I snatch the disc out of of the computer and stare at it. "what made you think of this?"

"it was the only empty case." he shrugs. I grin at him.

"okay, okay," we still don't have the password. I read the cover of the case he hands me. "I'm an insomniac who listens to Metallica to fall asleep. what song would make me do that?"

Spencer frowns, grabs the thing back from my hands, and scans the track list within the span of a second.

"'Enter Sandman'." he says. I watch the puzzle pieces fall into place in his brain, those lips parting with a slight smile playing at the edges. his eyes gleam with satisfaction.

"you are a national treasure." I type like the wind, unlocking the screen and immediately digging into his files. Spencer peers over my shoulder as we search for any indication of Heather's location.

"fucking bingo." I mutter when a video feed pops up. it's black-and-white, showing a crate in the corner of the room with a light hanging above it. Heather's inside, eyes duct taped and hands tied in front of her.

Spencer is already dialing Hotch's number. the blood drains from my face as I watch her trying to breathe through the gag in her mouth.

nothing in the feed is helpful in terms of finding out where she is. it's a nondescript room with wooden floors, mostly shrouded in darkness except for the light hanging overhead.

"wait a minute." I pause what I'm doing.

"hm?" Reid asks. I hit a few keys, trying something.

"I'm lining up the last twelve images." I explain as he watches me work. the photos sit in a grid on the screen, causing my heart to stop in my chest when I notice what I've been meaning to find. "look at the light."

"it's shifting positions like it's swaying," he notices. "like the earth is tilting."

"the ocean." I nod. we share another glance, both of our hearts hammering. we're so close to solving this, I can feel it in my chest. "we need to tell Hotch. find out if there are any piers or docks near here. there's no way he could get the webcam image from the middle of the ocean."

Reid nods, runs downstairs as fast as he possibly can. when he goes, I notice the board in the corner of the room: Go, mid-game. I've never learned how to play.

...

by the time I get back to my apartment that night, my limbs feel like jello. I collapse into the chair by my door and rub my eyes again. my head is still pounding now that the adrenaline rush has subsided. we ended up finding Vogel at the docks; Heather is safe. Hotch was shot in the arm, but he'll be fine. and I'm still a little in shock.

I hate the rumble of my stomach as I realize I haven't eaten since this morning. my head was too full of other thoughts to even consider food and after such a long day, I can barely fathom getting up to change into pajamas.

my phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out to see that Garcia texted me.

what are you up to? followed by a series of emojis that make me smile. I sink deeper into the seat before replying.

nothing why?

can I bring over takeout?

I stare at the message for a second with surprise. Garcia is fun and we've had drinks as a team, but I've never hung out with her one-on-one before. I'm curious.

sure. what genre of food should I expect?

Thai. send me your order!

that sounds so good right now, I almost order it myself. part of me is nervous about hanging out with a team member by myself, except she's been so friendly to me. Penelope was the first person to make me feel at home, aside from Prentiss.

I wait patiently for her to arrive, watching some TV and working my way through some leftover paperwork. my thoughts are everywhere right now, but when she tells me she's downstairs, I try to put it all out of my mind.

"hey!" I open the door to see Garcia with an armful of plastic bags.

"I have your curry, and I got chicken satay and spring rolls and fried rice in case you're still hungry." she beams at me. her bracelets make a pleasant clinking noise as she waves the goodies around.

"a woman after my own heart." I smile, stepping aside to let her in. we head upstairs and before long, we're settled on my couch with a full display of food on the coffee table. I heap my plate while she looks around my space.

"this place is so cute!" she says through a bite of spring roll.

"thanks. I've had it for about two years now. that window over there was really the selling point." I point to the enormous view of downtown DC, which is sparkling right now. there's another chair set in front of it, where I sometimes read or nap in my free time.

as we eat, Penelope and I gossip about work and the city and everything else. she's really easy to talk to. when I ask about her life, she doesn't seem guarded at all; unlike a lot of FBI agents I've met, she wears her experiences on her sleeve.

"how are you liking the team so far?" she asks a similar question as I received this morning. I smile to myself before answering truthfully.

"everyone is great. Hotch is kind of terrifying, but I've worked with people like him before." I shrug. he reminds me of one of my old professors: perpetually stoic to the point where he doesn't even seem like a real person. she laughs.

"he's super nice once you get to know him."

"really?" I look up.

"definitely. he's just always got that scowl on his face. don't let it put you off." she pats my hand reassuringly. I sigh, finish chewing my bite. there's been something prodding me since visiting Garcia's tech lair for the first time, when she showed me her collection of puppy calendars and fuzzy pens.

"can I ask you a question?"

"anything, my love." she smiles warmly. I hesitate, hoping I don't ruin the moment somehow.

"how did you get involved in the FBI? you just don't seem very..." my sentence trails off.

"government oriented?" she laughs. "I used to do a lot of hacking in my free time, and I got into some stuff that the government didn't like. and, um-- you know that saying, 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em'?"

I nod.

"it was like that, except they hired me. and I love it." she finishes the last spring roll. I think on this, imagining Penelope doing something so serious that the American government hired her on the spot for her skills. it's interesting.

"so you don't profile at all." I state.

"technically no, but I've picked up a couple things." she smirks.

"oh, yeah? like what?"

"well, it's obvious that you're never home, based on the lack of decoration here." she refers to the mostly blank walls of my apartment. aside from a couple photos of my friends and family, there's not much unique to me. "and you've obviously got a candle addiction." she points to the various spots around the living room, where half-burned pots of wax sit patiently awaiting their next light.

"that's definitely true." I laugh. she gets up and starts to smell the various candles.

"I like this one a lot." she sets down my chai vanilla one. I let her go through my things, despite the fact that Garcia is incredibly reserved about people touching her own little office trinkets. she picks up stray books and memorabilia, occasionally making a comment.

while she does, I finish my curry. I'm way too tired to resist her search, anyway. I'll be curling up in bed soon and praying that tomorrow is a paperwork day. eventually, she settles onto the cushions again.

"you seem tired," she says when she glimpses the dark circles beneath my eyes. "I'll get out of your hair."

"what? oh, I'm sorry." I draw myself up a little more. "this last case just took a lot out of me."

"they all do." she gives me a soft expression, then pats my knee as she stands.

"Penelope." I say as she gathers up her coat and purse.

"yes, darling?"

"thanks. for the food and for coming over." I smile gratefully at her. the tech analyst stands at my door with a look on her face that makes me think we're going to be good friends.

"anytime." she heads out, leaving me on the couch. I stare at the mess of empty takeout boxes that I told her to leave. now that I've eaten, getting up to clean the space is even more difficult. I trudge about the apartment, wash some dishes, and head off to bed.

my body is too exhausted to remember the dreams.

...

"oh my god, I'm so sorry!" I practically sprint into the conference room, swinging my bag down by my feet as I grab the last open chair. JJ is standing at the front of the room with a new case on the screen. everyone stares at me as I settle in. "my train was super delayed."

"everyone is allowed to be late," Hotch barely glances up from the case file. "once."

a chill runs down my spine and my face flushes an embarrassing red as JJ passes me the remaining file. keeping my head down, she notices my discomfort and clears her throat.

"okay, you guys are heading to Arizona today." she clicks a button. some pictures pop up for us to see. "Bradshaw College in Tempe has had six fires in seven months."

it's a video recording of a building from the outside, and two students talking about a fire inside. the camera shifts to show them in their own dorm, examining a strange wet spot leaking into their room. and then one of them catches on fire.

he burns to death on tape. it's jarring, the shrieking noises he lets out as the flames engulf his body. they travel up his legs alarmingly fast, so much so that it's obviously chemical.

"the first fire was in March, the second in May. the third didn't happen until September." JJ explains once the clip is over. "and then two weeks later, there were three that happened in one night."

"he's speeding up." Prentiss observes from her spot next to me.

"82% of arsonists are white males between seventeen and twenty-seven. female arsonists are far less common, with motives usually limited to revenge." Reid sits across the table, adjusting his watch.

I raise my eyebrows at his fact and look more at the crime scene photos. burned flesh is definitely an uncomfortable sight, one that makes my stomach churn.

"sounds like he's a student." Morgan taps his pen against his fingertip and leans back in his chair.

"I wouldn't be so sure," Hotch continues to read the document. "we don't want to rely too much on precedent."

at this, I press my knuckles to my chin and try to think of other suspects. he's obviously doing these during the school year, but that doesn't necessitate that he's a student. he could be working on campus-- a professor, even.

"there's a rapid escalation. he's gone from the damage to a building to something far more satisfying." Morgan closes the file and we all look to Hotch.

"wheels up in thirty." he says. I get up to grab my go-bag and gather some things from my desk, my cheeks burning at the memory of being late again. I've never done that before, but I don't want to start now. maybe it's best if I start coming in early, just in case my train gets delayed again. I can't risk losing this job, or being moved to a different department. it was enough of a hassle switching from sex crimes to the BAU. I really want to settle into this position, and that includes having the unit chief not hate me.

"hey." Prentiss catches my wrist just as I'm hurrying out of the room. I turn to her.

"hi."

"a little birdy told me that you and Reid pretty much single-handedly solved that case yesterday." she smiles.

"oh, no. it wasn't just us." I shake my head.

"quit being modest. nice job." she nudges my shoulder as we walk down the steps to the bullpen. "also, I brought a couple of those horticulture magazines that I told you about. we should read them on the jet."

"no way!" I pause at my desk, grinning.

"one of them has a whole section on caring for orchids."

"orchids?" Morgan overhears her from his desk. he appears deeply concerned with our discussion.

"if you have to ask, you wouldn't understand." she smirks. he turns his attention to me in hopes of a clearer answer.

"it's plant care." my explanation seems to be enough to bore him, however, because he just shrugs and returns to packing his bag up. Emily waves the stack of magazines at me before I head over to her desk.

she doesn't really seem like the type of person to be into it, but when Emily caught sight of the air plants I've got scattered on my desk my first week, we got wrapped up in a conversation about them. there's a special magazine subscription as well that has a bunch of helpful tips about where to buy and how to keep them healthy.

I'm flipping through one of the copies on the way to the elevator, my nose buried in a section about how much to water Hoyas, when Reid and JJ pop in next to me. the blonde is on the phone with someone, presumably the Tempe police. I haven't seen much of her recently-- she's been staying behind for most cases-- but she sends me a sweet smile before returning to her call.

"what are you reading?" Spencer's eyes hungrily run over the paper, as if seeing something he hasn't already absorbed in that big brain is unbearable. his hair is slicked back as usual, and his tie is sort of crooked; he's not aware of it. I hold the material between us so he can take a peek.

"a magazine about plants that Prentiss and I like."

"fascinating. can I see?" he grabs it before I can answer, although I don't think he means to. his fingertip runs down the page quickly, and then he's flipping them like mad, staring at the pictures. my eyes widen at how eager he is; I guess his curiosity is enough to override any awkwardness.

"did you know that owning indoor plants is actually correlated to overall mood improvements?" he asks me once he finishes reading, attention still focused on the back cover. the elevator door to the main level slides open.

"no, but I'm proof of it," I take back the reading material and put it in my bag. we walk out into the lobby. his long legs mean that my pace has to quicken a bit in order to keep up. "something about taking care of them is quite nice. they don't need as much attention as a pet, but they still rely on you."

"interesting." he nods.

"I like to think so."

"maybe I'll get one." he muses more to himself than anyone else. I smile at his open-mindedness, keep my eyes on the tiles we're walking over. maybe he, Prentiss, and I can have our own affinity club. he would become more knowledgeable than both of us combined within the span of a week.

[harrysbbby]

Don’t Forget Where You Belong - JJ Maybank x Reader - Part Two

A/N: okay so this one’s very longggggg but there’s so much storyline to get through, I think all the parts might be. But please let me know what you think!

Read part 1 here

You walked down the pontoon to where John B had just pulled up the HMS Pogue. You were carrying a cooler with full of snacks of your day on the boat.

“Morning y’all,” you said as you took JJ’s hand as he helped you into the boat.

“You brought food, thank God. I’m starving,” he said dramatically. You laughed at his desperation as he clamoured to open the cooler as soon as your two feet were steadily placed. You knew that the boys would never willing ask for or take your money. You constantly tried to help them out, but their pride was too strong. So, you compromised, by supplying all the food and beer you could get them each time you got together.

You opened the cooler, passing a beer around to everyone.

“You guys get through?” you asked, passing the freshly opened bottle to John B. The hurricane Agatha had ripped through the OBX the night previous. Your stepfather already had maintenance workers clearing your yard when you left this morning.

“Yeah,” John B replied, “Nothing major, just a tree fell but at least it wasn’t on the house.” He shrugged. You laughed at his nonchalant-ness as your cheers him and took a sip of your beer.

“We were fine, but I’m pretty sure my dad’s gonna kill me for skipping out.” Pope said, glaring at JJ and John B. JJ hugged Pope from behind.

“But you love us anyway, buddy!”

As you reach further into the marsh Pope had taken over steering as JJ stood at the bow, his second (or was it third?) beer in his hand.

“Can you go a little faster?” he asked Pope as he brought the bottle further into the air, letting the contents spill out the neck. You scoffed and moved out of the way as the sticky liquid landed on your arm.

“Here we go. I'm movin'.” Pope said, pushing down the accelerator.

“It doesn’t work JJ,” John be said, crossing his arms and tilting his head back to get some sun.

“Yeah dude, not like you haven’t already tried like 6000 times,” you spoke with disgusting, now having moved to the back of the boat wiping your arm on your towel.

“I got this. It's gonna work!”

“You’re getting beer in my hair!” Kie exclaimed, moving to stand next to you as you rolled your eyes.

“JJ,” you were going to patronise him further, but you didn’t get the chance as the boat came to a static halt. JJ went flying overboard, flipping through the air and into the water. You and Kie fell straight forward on top of one another.

“Jesus, Pope!” Kie groaned as you rolled off the top of her. Both of you stay laying on your backs trying to catch your breath.

“You okay, JJ?” John B asked, peering over the side of the boat.

“I think my heels touched the back of my head,” you heard JJ’s voice come from the water.

“Well it’s shame, you’re missing the girl on girl action up here.” John B quipped as he helped you and Kie up.

“Oh, fuck off John B,” you said as you shoved him. You could see JJ still floating on his back in the water.

“Damn,” he sighed. He finally lifted his head to look at you. You stuck your tongue out at him and flipped him off as he began swimming back towards the boat.

“Pope, what did you do?” Kie asked.

“Sandbar. The channel changed.” He replied.

“No shit,” you replied dryly, sitting next to Kiara.

“Ugh, this is probably gonna mess this whole place up,” she said sullenly.

“Hey, I saved the beer, though!” JJ exclaimed, still in the water.

“Congrats, JJ,” John B said. You looked over the side of the boat and gave him a sarcastic applause. He flipped his hand through the air as if he was bowing. He continued to swim on his back towards the boat, bringing said beer to his lips and taking a sip. You laughed at his actions and he turned his head to smile up at you.

“Guys...” Pope interrupted, “I think there's a boat down there”

“Shut up, what!” John B yelled, running to peer over the side of the boat where Pope was staring down into the water.

“No way!” JJ said as he kicked faster, turning on his side using one arm to propel himself faster in the water, he other arm still holding the beer up in the air.

“No, no, guys. I'm serious,” Pope continued as you and Kie joined him looking over the edge of the boat into the water. You could see something white glistening in the water. “There's a boat down there”

“For real,” you confirmed.

“Guys... is this...” John B started but Pope interrupted.

“It’s a boat!”

“Holy shit, he's right. Let's go!” Kie exclaimed as she started stripping her clothes off her body and dive into the water. She was very quickly followed by John B and Pope.

“You think there's a dead body down there?” Pope asked as he bobbed in the water. Your four friends looked up at you as you stood on the boat still, hands grasping the bottom of your shirt as you hesitated.

“Get your ass in here!” JJ hollered.

“Come on!” John B yelled.

You gave in. Your clothes came off in two quick swipes as you dove in after your friends who had already submerged themselves into the water. The five of you inspected the boat. It was large, and expensive… wait it couldn’t be the sort you thought right? You grabbed the side as you swashed around trying to find anything noteworthy. As you began to feel your lungs tighten you pushed off the end of the boat towards the surface.

The five of you gasped for breath as you broke the surface.

“You guys saw that?”

“Yeah,” Pope and John B said.

“What the...” JJ began but heaved as he tried to catch his breath. The boys laughed at him as they hoisted themselves up onto the boat. Pope put his arms out for you.

“That’s a Grady-White,” you said as he helped you aboard.

“A new one of those is like 500 Gs, easy,” confirmed JJ, as he climbed up on the boat, before turning around and grabbing Kie’s arm helping her up, “that's a primo rig.”

“Yeah. That's the boat I saw when I surfed the surge,” he said, directing mainly at Pope.

“Maybe it hit the jetty or something?” Pope shrugged.

You and Kie exasperated at the same time, “You surfed the surge?”

“Yeah,” he said quietly, avoiding both your gazes.

“That's my boy. Pogue style,” JJ encouraged as he patted John B’s shoulder.

“What the heck,” Kie whispered in disbelief.

“Don’t encourage him JJ,” you scolded to which he rolled his eyes and draped an arm around your shoulders.

“Wait, wait. Do we know whose boat that is?” Pope asked

“No, but we're about to find out,” John B responded.

“Dude, it’s too deep,” JJ said stepping toward John B who had gathered the anchor.

“Only for the weak and feeble, JJ”

“Well, I'm not resuscitating you. I'm just making that clear up front.”

“That’s fine.”

“John B,” you interrupted the two boys quipping like an old married couple. John B’s chuckle disappears, and he looks at your serious expression. You know once John B set his mind to something, he did it, so you rolled your eyes and said,

“Diver down fool.”

“Diver down,” he confirmed.

“Yeah he is,” JJ yelled boyishly as he pushed John B recklessly into the water which earned a scorned ‘JJ’ from Kie.

After a few minutes he still hadn’t resurfaced.

“Should we go get him?” Pope asked, but almost as if on cue John B emerged from the water.

“Oh, my God. That took forever!” Kie sighed.

“Any dead bodies?” Pope asked.

“Looting potential?” JJ continued.

“No, just this motel key.”

“Great! We salvaged a motel key,” JJ said sarcastically as John B returned to the boat and started the engine.

“Guys, we should report the wreck to the coast guard,” Kie suggested as you took off through the marsh, “Maybe we'll get a finder's fee.”

“Yeah, and not work all summer,” JJ said hopefully. You laughed at him as you amused,

“No thanks to Agatha, ya batch!”

You had attempted to report the sunken boat, however after the hurricane the coast guard was uncharacteristically busy, so John B came up with the not-so-great plan of going to the motel to snoop through the room. How you managed to get dragged along each and every time, you will never know.

“This is your captain speaking. HMS Pogue comin' in for landin,” JJ whooped as he jumped off the boat and tied it to a post on the bank of the motel. It had been hit pretty badly, with lots of debris everywhere.

John B moved to join JJ on land, and you followed. The unspoken rule was always that if you had to follow them to do something stupid, you got to supervise said stupid something.

“Hey, don’t let him do anything stupid.” Pope said, pointing to JJ.

“Oh, we will,” John B smirked back.

“I’m not making any promises,” you grumbled as you walked past John B. JJ feign hurt as you approached him. As you got closer, he reached his arm out to tickle your sides. You grabbed his wrists as you giggled, “cut it out,”

“Be careful.” Kie said to John B.

“Yeah,” he nodded at her. She brought herself forward and placed a kiss on his cheek.

“I mean it.” She said more sternly. You noticed a flush of red on John B’s cheeks.

The three of you made you way into the Motel and up the stairs.

“Just be so careful, John.” JJ said dramatically grabbing John B’s shoulders. You laughed as you strolled behind the two.

“You are so weird,” John be stated.

“What was that about?”

“I don’t know,” John B said, “Maybe she wants us to be careful?”

“Since she heard you're being threatened with exile, she's just been, like, ‘Oh! Be so careful, John B.’” – “Get off me JJ” – ‘Oh, give me that John D already.’ When are you gonna swoop on that, man?”

“Can you not refer as Kie as something to ‘swoop on’ please?” You said pushing your way through the two, grabbing the motel key n your way. You twirled in it your fingers as you read the room numbers and continued to listen to them speak.

“Bro, you know the rule. No Pogue-on-Pogue macking,” John B said, “besides, you’re the one always hitting on her.”

“Of course, I’m hitting on her!” You were glad the two boys couldn’t see your face as JJ said this as it became hot as your stomach dropped. Whenever the boys spoke about Kie this was it always made your heart ache a little. You knew the boys loved you but not in the way they did Kiara. She caught their attention. They all had a thing from her, and although you didn’t necessarily want that kind of attention from your friends, it hurt to know that people always looked at Kiara as that, and not you. Well you wouldn’t mind it from one of your friends actually. You shook the though from your head as you peered down at the motel key quickly fixating yourself on finding the room.

“She's a super-hot, rich, hippie chick slumming with us,” JJ continued, “Why? I can't figure it out either, but who cares, bro? I know that door's locked because I've tried it. Have you?”

“You need help JJ,” you laughed as you came to a halt in front of the door. You were sure that the boys had been so enthralled in their conversation that they had completely forgotten about the task at hand.

“Not a little help, you need a lot of help. It's like every girl who just has a heartbeat, you're like... "Uhh!"”

You laughed with them, but the smile didn’t reach your eyes. JJ’s smiling face turned from John B’s to yours’ and his smile slipped as he saw your fake expression. His brows furrowed,

“What? It's not a big deal,” he tried to say nonchalantly, but it came out unsure.

“This is us. Twenty-nine.” You stopped their conversation as you pointed towards the door.

JJ pushed forward tapping three times on the door, “Housekeeping,” he said in a high-pitched girlish voice. You laughed as you rolled your eyes.

“Should we try it?” questioned John B. You shrugged as you nodded and placed the key into the handle.

“No power. No security cameras. No one's gonna know,” JJ said as you unlocked the door and made your way inside.

The three of you searched the room, looking for any evidence of who owned the boat, or what they were doing.

“A jacket… No name on the jacket… Nice jacket though”

“Definitely over 50. He’s got New Balances”

JJ was looking at a map, “maybe this is where they were fishing.”

You peered over his shoulder, “Nah, that’s off continental shelf. Big Swell, no one fishes there,” you finished looking at the papers on the table as JJ moved away.

“Coffee”

“Standard, tissues for when you get lonely,” JJ had started talking in a funny British accent. You looked at him quizzically over your r shoulder as he made his way towards the bathroom. A shrill “oooh” came from there.

“Did you find something detective?” You asked in an equally terrible British accent as you sorted through the files.”

“A really awesome Dopp kit you won't let me steal,” he said in his normal voice.

“Yeah, 'cause we're not stealing shit.” John B said as you could hear him punching in numbers on the safe.

“Punching shit at random. That will... definitely work,” JJ said. John B just grunted at him as he continued to put numbers in. You looked to your right where you saw handwritten numbers on a loose sheet of paper.

“Here try this,” you said handing the piece of paper as JJ moved back to investigate the map. He started jabbering on about swordfish or his cousin or something. However, you and John B both zoned out as you stared at the contents of the safe. You shared a shocked look before turning back to it.

“Have you heard of shoals?”

“JJ,” you interrupted him. “Check this out.”

JJ say what was in the safe and immediately picked up the gun.

“You picked up the gun,” you sighed into your hands and John B stood up to try and stop JJ’s childish swinging of the weapon.

“This is a SIG Sauer!” JJ mused as he pointed it in random directions with little “pow pow”s coming out his mouth.

“Put the gun back, JJ!” John B scolded.

“This is a fucking spendy gatt, man. Just... Bam! Bam!”

“JJ,” you warned him moving towards him to try and grab it, but he spun around out of your way, placing you next to the window. You groaned.

“Just take a pic of me. Right here,” he said spinning back around to face you.

“Take a picture of you?” You asked shaking your head.

“Yeah, like…” he said as he framed multiple different posing with the gun.

“Make our own incriminating evidence? Is that what you're talking about?” John B said. JJ’s shoulder slumped as his idea for a photo was shut down. You heard a tapping on the window. You yanked up the blinds to see Pope and Kiara on the grass waving their arms. They were mouthing something you couldn’t decipher. You lifted up the window and you could only one word coming from them: “Cops.”

“What is it?” John B asked as you turned around, a frightened look on your face. But it was too late. There was a rap on the door.

“Kildare County Sheriff's Department!”

“Shit,” you cursed under your breath as the two boys made their way passed you to the window. The climbed out. JJ helped you onto the sill as he climbed to the left side. You turned around to close the window behind you but as you stood up you lost your balance. You started to lean further and further backwards but JJ shot his arm out. He caught your mid back and pulled you towards him. Your chest was flush against his as he squeezed the two of you towards the wall.

The cops entered the room. They snooped around looking for any evidence. Shoupe opened the already unlocked safe. He took out the photographs and gave them to the constable as evidence. He then grabbed as wad of cash and gave it to her. You and John B shared a stunned look.

“What the fuck,” the words slipped your lips.

“What?’ you heard JJ ask in your other ear.

“He just slipped her the cash.” You whispered back.

You could feel your foot slipping on the thin ledge. You held onto JJ’s shoulders as you tried to reconvene your footing.

“You good?” he asked quietly. You nodded getting your feet in a position you could withhold. JJ readjusted his arm around your middle, but in doing so, the gun became lose and fell to the ground with a very loud clattering. You cringed as JJ pushed both you and him closer against the wall. Your faces were practically touching, you could see the air hastily coming in and out of his mouth in short, sharp breathes. You closed your eyes as you took a deep breath. You turned your head to John B who held a finger up to his lips. He could see more than you could, and by hi actions you could tell he meant as long as you stayed silent, the cops would notice you.

‘All right, let’s go.” You heard the cop say. You exhaled a large amount of air you hadn’t been holding as soon as you heard the motel door shut. You head fell forward onto JJ’s shoulder as you let out an exasperated laugh.

“Holy shit,” you breathed.

“Yeah that was close,” he sighed, giving your waist a squeeze.

You and JJ followed John B back through the window and down to the HMS Pogue. You untied the boat as Pope drove you away.

“Could have warned us sooner,” John B said, as you slouched into the seat next to him, rolling his shoulders to exude their tenseness.

“We would have, except Pope was on the math team,” she spoke accusingly, looking at him with eyebrows raised.

“You were on the math team,” JJ giggled.

“The cops took everything like it was a crime scene.” John B stated seriously. You nodded in agreeance.

“Did you find anything?” Pope asked.

“Did we find anything?” JJ asked sarcastically, “No I don’t think so. Oh, yeah we did,” he said proudly brandishing the gun and a wad of cash from either of his pockets.

“Oh my god...” you started

“What the hell,” Pope said incredulously.

“Dude, what?” Kie joined.

“Dude, chill. Come on,” he said, clearly not understanding why no one else was as excited as he was.

“You are going to be the death of me boy,” you said, frustratedly running your hands over your face.

“Why take that from a crime scene?”

“Better than cops having it,”

“Really, JJ?” you asked. He shrugged his shoulders and nodded sheepishly.

“I’m gonna lose my merit scholarship.” Pope spoke morbidly.

“At least you still have us, right?” JJ said wrapping his arms around Pope despite the gun and cash still being in his hands.

“I’m living the nightmare.”

The five of you had returned to the coast guard to try and report the boat again, but it there was a lot of commotion coming from the docks. You took a seat with a bunch of other on lookers. You took the final seat on the bench and JJ stood beside you as John B, Pope and Kie took seats around another girl.

“Who’s that?” John B asked as a body was wheeled past on a stretcher.

“Scooter Grubbs,” the unknown girl next to him answered, “He was out during the storm. Check out this pic I got. Dead bodyyyyy,” she leaned over with her phone showing the mangled body of the man.

“Insane,” John B replied mildly disgustedly. You shared his disgust. How could this girl have no restitution for taking a photo of a man’s dead body?

“Holy shit,” you heard JJ drawl from above you as he leaned over your body to grasp a look. He had a boyish smile on his face until he saw your stern expression to which he dropped his smile and let out an awkward cough.

A thought crossed your mind, “do you know what kind of boat he had?” you asked the girl.

She peered back at her phone as she answered, “Somehow, that dirtbag copped a brand-new Grady-White. Everyone’s out looking for it.”

You saw Pope and Kiara learn forward around the girl and make eye contact with you. You looked to John B who stared back just as alarmed. You turned to JJ who already held a stunned expression.

In an almost synchronised fashion, the five of you jumped out of your seats and bee-lined for the Pogue to head back to the Chateau. You were all thinking the same thing: this was not good.  

Tag list:

@downbytheouterbanks​ @thesailbells​ @sexualparkour​ @bestfriendmagic​ @mileven-reddie​ @nikki082489​ @treestarrrrrrrr​ @mynamessusan​ @kristinaxilliano​

[bbq-hawks-wings]

!!!Manga Chapter 192 SPOILERS!!!: If Hawks permanently lost his wings, does this mean he's free from the Hero Public Safety Commission? The reason that they took him in when he was child was because they wanted a hero whom they can control. And, Hawks being a young child who was gifted with incredible talent was a perfect candidate. But, now, if he lost his wings, he can't be a hero anymore, and the HPSC would no longer need him. Which means he would be free! And he would no longer feel (1)

burdened to be a hero anymore because he wouldn't be able to use his quirk. I read a post by makeste that said Hawks has a "With great power comes great responsibility" mindset. His powerful quirk and the training that he went through is the "great power" and the feeling of NEEDING to be a hero because he had these skills to save people is the "great responsibility". What are your thoughts? (2)

I do have thoughts, and perhaps the fastest way to sum them up is:

“I wish it were that easy.”

I do not see the Commission easing up on him if he can no longer perform hero work because Hawks is much more than his quirk - both as a person and as a public figure.

We saw the Commission make a big deal about Best Jeanist when he was out of action, and that resulted in him having a larger approval rating than Hawks himself. If they wanted to use him as PR I could easily see them going with one of two directions:

Pity PR - make his injuries into a tale about the bravery and sacrifice of heroes in hopes to salvage some sort of support from people after Shigaraki nuked at least half a town.

Scapegoat - Hawks is almost definitely not the one who planned the raid in this arc; but he was the one who collected information and that can be enough. If the Commission wanted to deflect blame for this disastrous outcome facts don’t matter - you can always spin a yarn. (This is a tactic that’s canon to the series since the battle between the LoV and MLA.)

There’s also the concern they have to weigh about leaving loose ends. Hawks may have had star potential as a child - able to be molded and shaped into whatever they wanted - but that’s not what they got. He’s rebellious, fast and loose with the orders they give him, and he has all but stated in so many words “If you did not hold power over me,” - and we don’t really know what exactly that means yet - “I would tell you to shove it where the sun don’t shine.” Did I mention this was also to the president's face?!

For all their efforts, he’s not a perfectly obedient or controllable person at all. In fact, he let slip that he knows about areas of their operation they didn���t know he was aware of. Even without his wings, he’s a clever, capable person able of discerning the identities of a cult whose numbers ran at least in the thousands in a few measly months, successfully sharing all of that info, and all while never getting caught - while bugged to the teeth to boot!

He’s dangerous to leave unchecked.

Even if the Commission as a whole is not particularly nefarious (though, buying a child from his family and attempting to erase his identity in the hopes of making the perfect puppet hero is pretty sus), they know he's capable of turning that same PR game on them, and he would have LOTS of ammo to work with. Frankly, we rarely give him due recognition for potentially being able tear down hero society as a whole with his own two hands. You can't just let someone like that go without insurance of some kind.

And then there's the hero work itself - specifically how he feels about it. "With great power" is almost a full encapsulation of his attitude towards being a hero, but I think it misses a small but crucial part we don't often get to see because of the emphasis on his mission:

He never said he doesn't want to be a hero - just to live in a world where he can slow down and take it easy. "I'm not in it for the fame or the money. I'd actually be more free further down the ranks, like somewhere in the 20's." But he can't stop himself from putting in 110%, and even when that 110% doesn't have the same pull without his wings, if the future he wants isn't a reality yet he's still going to put it in.

In short, losing his wings is likely going to be one of the WORST possible things to happen to him and will make it harder for him to live the life he wants. None of the pieces are in place to make the loss worth it.

He is still firmly in the hand of the Commission with whatever they're holding over his head to be used as they please, if he wasn't they aren't going to just let him get off easy, and being in a world that grows scarier by the day wishing to reach out to those crying for help but being unable to do anything - that would make his life an actual hell on earth.

[ithehellisbucky]

Today

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Requested: None

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: Clasutraphobia, panic, anxiety, implied PTSD, trust issues, angst, fluff, mental illness, trauma, anxiety attack, sexual innuendos

Author’s Note: Let me know if I missed anything in the warnings, and let me know if I got anything wrong or misportrayed in the part where the stuck in the elevator, I want to be as accurate and informed as possible, and I definitely don’t want to be offensive.

My Masterlist

~

Today was a good day. A very good day. Not only a good day, but a great day. Bucky was doing okay. He was smiling, he was happy. Happy is always a good thing, especially with Bucky.

For starters, this morning was amazing. You woke up to an empty bed. And at first, you freaked out, normally when you the bed next to you was empty Bucky was having an episode. You looked around to see if anything was broken or damaged, but surprisingly nothing was. The blinds were even pulled open.

You get up and pushed the thin sheets off your body, causing you to remember last night's escapades with a smile. You stagger to the clean laundry pile, grabbing one of Bucky's shirts and pulling it over your head with a tug.

You stretch and feel your back crack, reminding you that its morning.

Walking into your kitchen in the mornings almost always brings a smile to your face. Perhaps it was the yellow rays of sunshine lighting up the room, or it could be the promise of breakfast. Today was no exception.

You were greeted to a shirtless Bucky, making pancakes and letting out a string of curse words whenever anything goes wrong.

You lean in the doorway for a minute, in the stereotypical romantic movie way. Bucky turns around and looks slightly shocked when he sees you standing there. "Shit, doll. I wanted to have breakfast ready for you woke u-"

You walk over to him and cut him off with a kiss, gently tugging him down to your height by his hair. He wraps both of his arms around your waist and you leave your hand in his hair while you wrap the other one around the back of his neck. Bucky spins you around and carefully picks you up and puts you on the kitchen island, deepening the kiss. 

You pull away for a heartbeat and say: "It's okay," before pulling him back towards your body. The two of you make out on the counter for a minute before you smell something burning. 

"Do you smell something burning?" You ask, pulling away from Bucky's lips, much to his protest.

"Shit shit shit." He exclaims, letting go of your body to run to the stove, attempting to save whatever's left of the pancakes.

You laugh at his charming forgetfulness, he was definitely an old man. 

"I'm going to get some cereal from the fridge unless you think you can salvage the pancakes?" You state with a giggle. 

"Yeah, that's probably for the best," Bucky responds. "None of these are eatable."

You walk over to your refrigerator and open the door to get the milk. Bucky's arms snake around your waist and he rests his chin on your shoulder. "I love you." 

"Relax, I was only getting milk." You exclaim with a chuckle. You spin around to face him and quickly peck him on the lips. "I love you too."

Bucky smiles into the kiss, and for a second you think he's shoving you into the fridge, and then you realize he's getting the milk. "Hm, I see you have an alternative motive."

"I only have eyes for you, Doll. 2% milk is no competition." Bucky smiles and lets you go. He reaches to the top of the fridge and grabs a box of cheerios. He puts the milk and cereal on the counter as you sit on one of the stools. 

"You seem to be having a good day." You exclaim as Bucky slides a bowl of cereal in front of you.

"I am." He says, going to sit across from you as you take a bite of your cereal. "God, did I tell you how fucking beautiful you are today." He says as more of a statement than a question.

"I think you just did." You say, spooning some cereal into your mouth. 

Bucky smiles a weathered smile and then perks up. "I just remembered, I got us a reservation at that place Pepper was talking about."

"The french place?" Bucky nods, his smile never wavering. "God, I can't wait to sink my teeth into a twelve dollar eclair." 

"Mm, what time is it?" You exclaim, confused at your lack of exhaustion, especially since you fell asleep at 1 am. 

"10." Bucky shrugs even though he's probably checked the clock at least twenty times since he woke up.

"It's 10!" You blurt, all while Bucky is sitting across from you, chuckling as he spoons cereal into his mouth. "I slept for 9 hours!"

Bucky grins, and you smile at his happiness. "It's nice to see you so happy." 

You put down your bowl of cereal and walk over to Bucky and stand behind him, resting your chin on his head and wrapping your arms around his waist. You plant a kiss on his shoulder. "I'm going to go take a shower."

"Okay," Bucky says as you walk to your bathroom.

"Are you coming." You exclaim from over your shoulder, looking for just long enough to see Bucky stand up, his smirk as prolific as ever.

~

You and Bucky made it out of your apartment at 12, after a very... Relaxing shower. 

Most of the time Bucky preferred to show no PDA, for fear of one of his enemies seeing and hurting you. Today was different. Bucky had his arm draped over your shoulder as you walked, he would smile every time he looked at you. Nobody would guess that this happy man had been through such tragedy. His past didn't define his future.

Instead of taking a taxi or the subway you and Bucky opted to walk the distance on the sidewalks of New York City. 

The two of you got an amazing apartment in Brooklyn for surprisingly cheap. You were pretty certain that Pepper did some meddling with your landlord, but you didn't care (and Bucky pretended he didn't know, even though you were certain he did).

The weather today was reflecting your mood. Bright and sunny. Today was such a good day. You and Bucky reach the restaurant after about an hour of peaceful walking. Bucky holds the door open for you like the complete gentleman he is.

The restaurant is insanely nice. Like, 12 dollar eclair nice. "Buck, do you think we can afford this place." You ask, immediately skeptical of the three forks and silk napkins.

"It's okay Doll," Bucky says, reassuring you in the most Bucky way.

"Do you have a reservation?" A woman's voice asked. Startled, you turn to see the hostess standing in front of you with a lively smile on her face.

"Yeah, Barnes," Bucky says, keeping his arms wrapped around you, an unusual cocky smile on his face. 

The woman smiles and looks down at her list, then looks back at you and Bucky and simply says: "Right this way."

The woman leads you and Bucky to a table next to the window, in the front of the store. Bucky pulls the chair away from the table for you and pushes you back in when you sit down.

You had rarely see Bucky smile this big, or smile at all frankly. Picking up the menu that the hostess put down on the table you quickly scan the sheet. Even though you were expecting the items to be pricey, you weren't expecting this. Hell, the eclairs weren't 12 dollars, they were 14.

You frantically look up at Bucky, concerned about the prices. Instead of seeing an incredibly distraught face, you were instead met with a beaming Bucky, adoration written across his features.

"What?" You ask, his smile spreading to your face.

"Nothing, I just love you so much." He reaches over the table and clutches your hand lovingly. Today was a good day.

~

The food was really expensive. But Bucky didn't care. And neither did you. Bucky was so happy, and nothing could make you happier than that.

You finished up lunch at 2:30, after several 14 dollar eclairs. Bucky takes your hand in his as you walk back to your apartment. He was no longer smiling, but his eyes were, much more than his mouth ever could.

After the half an hour-long trek the two of you finally made it back to your apartment building. You start to walk towards the stairs when Bucky catches your arm. "It's okay Doll."

Bucky had a phobia of small spaces. It reminded him of what Hydra would do to him, keep him strapped into a chair, and then throwing him into a tiny cell when they were done. Bucky only took the elevator when he needed to, or when he was too overwhelmed to know what he was doing. The point is, whenever Bucky had the choice, he would never use the elevator.

But today he did the opposite. "Are you sure, you don't need to feel like you have to." You respond, stroking the side of Bucky's face. 

"I'm alright, I promise," Bucky says, grabbing both of your hands and holding them in a loving embrace.

With your hand in his, you walk to the elevator, reassuring him by placing one of your hands on his shoulder. Bucky leans over and pushes the button for number 4, waiting patiently for the doors to close. "If you need to get off just let me know, we can stop at any time." You exclaim in the most calming voice you can muster.

As the doors to the elevator close, you hear Bucky take in a sharp and ragged breath. You put your other hand on his chest to calm him and his breathing seems to steady. The elevator moves upward and you can hear the sound of clanking as it reached each floor. When you reach the second floor you lean into Bucky and quietly say: "It's okay Baby, it's halfway done." All Bucky does is reach down and grab your hand, squeezing it to remind himself that you're there.

As the number flashes to the third floor you wait for it to go onto the fourth, but it doesn't. The elevator stops altogether. No. No. Of all people this could've happened to, it had to be Bucky. 

You immediately turn to meet Bucky's eyes, facing him and seeing the panic on his face. His eyes immediately flit around the room, looking for any possible exit and finding that there are not. 

"Bucky. Bucky. I need you to look at me." He avoids your eyes and continues to exam the room, looking for any crack or opening that he could take advantage of. His eyes set on the place where the sliding doors connect. "Bucky, please don't try to pull the doors open, it'll make it worse."

Bucky doesn't speak. He walks towards the doors and tries to put his fingers between the two doors. Bucky puts the tip of his fingers in the crack and tries to pry it open. It leaves a dent, but alas the doors don't budge. 

You try to touch Bucky, but right when you make contact with his skin he winces, and you pull away. You low your voice to a whisper, trying not to harm Bucky in any way. "Bucky, baby." 

Bucky turns back around to you, panic surging in his eyes. At first, you're terrified that you're no longer speaking to Bucky, but the Winter Soldier instead. In an instant, you were sure that the man standing in front of you wasn't the Winter Soldier, but someone desperately afraid of becoming him.

Bucky slams his hands into the wall and pulls another one up to rake against his face and hair. You lean in from across the elevator to see tears building up in Bucky's eyes. If you were another person, and Bucky meant something different to you, you would be fearful for your life. But you weren't somebody else, and Bucky meant the world to you; you were more scared for Bucky than for yourself. Bucky wouldn't hurt you, but would you accidentally hurt Bucky?

You walk closer to Bucky, and for the third time, you attempt to calm him. "Bucky." That was all you said. Not as a question, and without any hesitancy in your voice. It was a statement.

Bucky turns around to look at you, the heartbreak in his eyes more evident than ever, and a tear rolls down his face. Bucky staggers over to you and wraps his body around yours, making you carry some of the emotional and physical weight on Bucky's body and mind.

"Your name is James Buchanan Barnes." You feel his tears sinking through your shirt as he clutches you tighter. You continue, "You were born on March 10th in 1917." 

You slowly sink your body downward, taking Bucky down with you. "Your best friend is Steve Rogers." You lower yourself further. "In 1943 you enlisted in the army." Your voice lowers to a whisper as your body drops even further.

"You were assigned to the 107th." You reach the ground, "and were captured by Hydra." Bucky's breath hitches, and you wish you could skip this part of the story; but alas, you had to tell the bad parts before you could tell the good ones. "But you were rescued by Captain America."

You scoot your and Bucky's bodies towards the wall of the elevator.

"You joined the Howling Commandos." You say, pushing yourself further towards the wall. "But then you fell off a train."

Your back hits the wall and Bucky squeezes you harder, either from the slight impact or from news you just recited, probably both. "And was captured again by Hydra." You reposition yourself, putting Bucky's head in your lap, his body faces diagonally towards the middle of the elevator.

"You lost your arm." Bucky's face scrunches up, and you respond by stroking his hair, which visibly calms him down. "Hydra tortured you." That was the line that you said the quietest, but Bucky still shoots straight upwards. 

You grab his face in both of your hands. Bucky doesn’t wince, and you realize it’s because he knows that you would never hit him. You were one of the few people who would never hit him, and from what you’ve heard there aren’t as many people in Bucky’s life who would never physically hurt him as you wished there would be. "Inside your of your mind, Hydra created someone called the Winter Soldier." Even more, tears streaked down Bucky's face, and you rested his forehead on yours. "They used the Winter Soldier to do horrible things." You clutch Bucky tighter to your chest.

"Eventually you were rescued by Steve Rogers." Making a point to say his best friend's whole name, to reassure him that he was saved by an ally, not a foe. "He turned you back into Bucky."

Bucky was violently shaking at this point, so much that his metal arm was hitting the ground, making loud noises. "And Steve found you again." Bucky calmed down slightly, shaking less than he was before. "A man named Tony Stark waged war on you because of something the Winter Soldier did."

You pressed a light kiss onto Bucky's forehead, not wanting to startle him too much. "You and Mr. Stark made peace." Bucky calmed down more, and his body was shaking less. "And a woman named Shuri made sure that the Winter Soldier wouldn't come back." At this point, Bucky's body was almost entirely still, except for the occasional stutter. You were unhappy that you had to tell this next part as well.

"Then a man named Thanos waged a war." Bucky started shaking again, and he reached out his metal arm behind you to steady himself, which in the process caused his arm to make the clanking noise again as he shook. "And he wiped out half of the world." You pause for a moment, taking in a long and strangled breath "including you."

Bucky starts to shake even more, so you gently pull his head down to your chest, so he can hear your heartbeat. So he can know that you are alive and safe. "But you got brought back to life, by Mr. Stark none the less."

Bucky's choked sobs have slowed, and been replaced with silent tears. Your shirt was fully soaked, but that didn't matter. All that matters is that Bucky feels safe. That Bucky is safe. "Steve went back to the forties." Bucky's breath hitches again.

"Then you met me." Bucky stops breathing as heavily and looks up to meet your eyes. "You are safe." 

You pause, pressing a kiss to Bucky's temple "You are loved." You hadn't even realized it, but tears were streaking down your face.

Bucky sits up and stares you in the eyes. He wipes the tears off his face and feigns a small smile. "I'm safe?" He tries to say as a statement, but it comes off as a question instead. 

You put your hand on the top of his neck, resting just below his chin. "Yeah." You swallow, looking him dead in the eyes. "They can't hurt you anymore."

Bucky doesn't say anything, he simply leans in and kisses you. Not a passionate kiss, not a sensual kiss, but a loving kiss. A kiss that's only message was thank you. A kiss that both you and Bucky needed.

"I love you." He exclaims in a voice so quiet that if he had said it any lower you wouldn't be able to hear.

You pecked him on the lips and said a line that would be insensitive if you weren't in this current situation: "I know." You pause for a moment, and then remember something that you should have done the second the elevator stops: push the damn emergency button. 

Bucky is still holding onto you with a death grip, but the panel is a few feet away. You lean in closer to Bucky's head and whisper "hey Bucky, I have to let someone know we're stuck in here."

Bucky nods slightly, but when you go to move he maintains his grip on your body. Bucky's still shaking, although not as dramatically as before it's probably a good idea to stay holding onto him. When you look down at him he looks away, seemingly guilty for keeping you rooted in one spot.

"It's okay, I'll call Judy on my phone." Judy was your landlady, a nice woman in her late 60s. Judy had straight grey hair that she always wore with one lock of hair braided in the front. She was the type of person who sold hand-made tye-dye t-shirts at the front desk and talked about going to Woodstock like it was yesterday.

You had her number on speed dial and she picked up almost immediately after you started ringing. "Hello dear." She says, her soothing voice immediately calming you down.

"Um, we're, uh." You look down at Bucky, whose is at this point resting with his head on your lap while you were running your fingers through his hair. His eyes were closed and his body was still shaking, the sound of his metal arm clanging against the floor making the sharp metallic sound echo throughout the elevator.

You put your hand over your mouth in a certain way to make sure that only Judy could hear you. "We're trapped in the elevator." Bucky still hears, despite your best efforts, and flinches at the word trapped.

Judy gasps slightly and then begins frantically talking: "Oh dear lord, tell me what happened! Is James okay?" Judy always called Bucky James, and if it was almost anyone else he would be pissed, but no one could ever be pissed at Judy.

"Um, we're, uh- getting through it." Bucky grabs your hand and holds onto it for dear life, all while you move from running your hands through his hair to rubbing his temple. "Could you do me a favor and call the fire department?" You ask politely, even though in reality all you want is to freak out and get this fucking thing over with.

"Yes, I'll call them right now. Now dearie if you need anything just let me know. I am so terribly sorry that this happened to you and James."

"Thanks, Judy, I'll let you know." You hang up the phone and look back down at Bucky.

"How are you doing baby?" Bucky's eyes open and rest at a squint.

"I'm here." He exclaims, stating a fact that may seem useless to anyone else besides you. He was here. Bucky was here. Right now being here is the best you could hope for.

Bucky sits up, and you stroke a strand of hair out of his face. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Well, we're talking right now," Bucky says with a forced chuckle.

You smile for a split second and then lean in to kiss his hairline. "If you don't want to you don't have to."

"No. I- I do." Bucky gulps and looks away. "It's just- I've been through so much with Bucky. It just, uh- kind of shocked me that Steve would leave me. I trusted him." He looks back up and you can see tears glistening in his eyes.

"I know, I don't think that he knew what he was doing." You run your hand along his face again and watch a tear roll down his cheek. "I'm sorry baby, but you do know that I'm not going to leave you." You pause for a moment, creasing your brow. "Right?"

Bucky looks away, blinking several times. "I'm not going to leave you Bucky." You halt and run your fingers through your hair, trying to think of something that could calm him down. "I can't imagine not loving you, and I can't imagine a reason for leaving that love behind."

"I have something I want to ask you," Bucky exclaims as you go back to running your fingers through his hair.

"Shoot." You respond, trying to force yourself to calm down.

"I shouldn't. I- I mean I shouldn't right now." He gulps.

"Why not?" You ask, your brow creasing in worry, the artificial serenity on your face subtly being destroyed.

"Because you deserve it to be perfect, you are perfect." Bucky takes a long and shallow breath then continues. "And if you're with someone as obviously imperfect as me... Then at least the moment should be perfect.

He looks you in the eyes and sees the confusion. "I- I should do it now. But, since it's not perfect, I'll do it again later." He swallows. "I- I just need to know the answer, to, um- calm me down."

"Okay baby, what is it." You exclaim, worry creasing in between your brows.

He sits up and fumbles with something in his pocket. 

Oh my god

Holy fucking shit.

It was a velvet box.

He opens the box to reveal a classical engagement ring. You can't speak. Your hands go flush to your face and you can't speak. Bucky Barnes was sitting in an elevator, holding a wedding ring. For you.

Bucky's face drops when he notices that you haven't said anything. "Do you want to pretend like I didn't just do this. Or should we break up? I'm sorry, I just-" He pauses, and that's when you remember what he had gone through just minutes before.

There were dried tears on his face, and his body was still shaking. "I was having a good day." He says as a tear rolls down his cheeks. "Because I knew that I was going to propose to my girl today."

Bucky is at this point fully sobbing. He looks like he's going to go in to cry on your shoulder, but then he stops himself. That's when you realize that you never answered his question.

"Yes." You say at almost a complete whisper.

Bucky's eyes snap to your face and his entire demeanor changes. He immediately starts to smile and he completely lets down the guard that he was holding in his body language. "You want to marry me?" He asks, out of breath from nothing.

"More than I've ever wanted anything before." Bucky smiles and his tears stop. His shaking hands move to slide the ring onto your finger. Once the ring is on your finger you hold it up to the LED light projecting into the room. The diamond sparkles.

Bucky leans towards your face and presses a tender kiss onto your lips. You may be stuck in an elevator, and Bucky may still be healing, but you knew one thing for sure: you and Bucky will be alright.

Requests are open!

~Taglists are open~

Permanent Tags: @natasha-danvers​

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[animebw]

Short Reflection: Spring 2020 Anime

Spring 2020 was definitely a weird season for anime. With the Coronavirus situation delaying several highly anticipated sequels and even some promising first seasons (Do me a favor, watch Appare-Ranman when it starts airing again in the summer, it’s so damn good), the charts were slimmer picking than usual. There were no huge surprises, few unexpected gems, and in defiance of today’s action-hungry community, by far the most popular and beloved show was the second season of a character-driven rom-com. It feels like 2020′s gonna end up being a transitional year for anime, a passage that connects the old decade to the new while hovering in its own awkward middle zone without many standouts to its same. But while there wasn’t anything I really loved out of what I watched in spring, there was a decent number of shows I liked. If this is going to be a B-tier year overall, at least there’s plenty of good B-tier stuff to pass around

Shironeko Project Zero Chronicle: 3/10

I honestly feel bad for the creators of Shironeko Project. I can imagine some hack writer shoving the script off on the rest of the team and running for the hills after collecting his paycheck, leaving everyone else to try and make something salvageable out of the most agonizingly generic JRPG-inspired fantasy epic imaginable. It’s painful to watch this show at times, because despite how bad it is, you can tell how fucking hard the team is trying to make it work. The musical score is genuinely kinda great, there’s some surprisingly strong dramatic lighting, and while the animation is clearly suffering from abysmal budgeting and scheduling, there are clear attempts to make the battles and emotional tableaus genuinely beautiful. It comes so close to working at times I wish I could bring myself to like it. But the godawful script, ridden with cliches and contrivances and moronic plot turns, coupled with a production nowhere near up to the task to depicting such grand fantasy vistas, suffocate it in the cradle. And to add insult to injury, it can’t even have a conclusive ending, because it has to awkwardly set up all the elements for the start of the game it’s a prequel to. That game will likely not see its own anime adaptation, and if Shironeko Project is anything to go by, that’s probably for the best..

Princess Connect Re:Dive: 4/10

What would you get if you took Konosuba and replaced its biting cynicism with inoffensive blandness? Not very much, if Princess Connect is anything to go by. Created as a tie-in to a mobile game and with the director of Konosuba at the helm, it’s certainly got all the lavish, loose comedic animation necessary for a goofy fantasy lark. And it’s definitely the prettiest show I watched all season; these environments, backgrounds, and action scenes are nothing short of gorgeous. But every single character is a black hole of personality, from the bit parts to the protagonists. The plot is utterly directionless, the chemistry is nonexistent, there’s maybe two good laughs per episode, and every subplot is just an excuse to shove in some other asinine character from the game who will proceed to do fuck-all but stand around and eat up screen time along with every other single member of this unconscionably bloated cast. I might not have been Konosuba’s biggest fan, but Princess Connect is a crushing reminder of why it needed to exist; we should not be wasting this much talent and skill on such utterly flavorless slop.

Tower of God: 5/10

When I started watching Tower of God, I was struck with two distinct thoughts. Thought 1: This is gonna be the dumbest anime bullshit I’ve seen since Akame ga Kill. Thought 2: I’m still probably going to enjoy it. Both those thoughts mostly proved accurate: Tower of God is dumb, dumb, dumb, packed full of over-the-top, one-note characters and ridiculous shonen battle scenarios that stretch all definitions of plausibility. It’s an excuse for a bunch of colorful personalities to butt heads and smack each other with special powers, and whenever it’s focused on that, the slick action animation and the gorgeous, unique use of stark color design make for a decently entertaining ride. Unfortunately, the longer it goes on, the more I started to get frustrated at how little I understood what was actually going on. Where is this Tower? What’s its society like? Why are any of these people even climbing it? What’s the world outside supposed to be? Is there a world outside? Even after thirteen episodes, I still have no idea what the context to any of this is supposed to be. This, folks, is how not to do slow-burn mystery box narratives. Also, Rachel’s by far the best character, fuck you fight me.

Listeners: 5/10

I have not watched Eureka Seven. I didn’t even know Listeners was written by the writer of Eureka Seven until literally everyone mentioned that fact in their review of the first episode. And now that I’ve watched Listeners, I think I need to watch Eureka Seven. Not because Listeners is good; in fact, it’s kind of a giant fucking mess. The plot makes no sense, the CG robot battles aren’t even passable, and it trades any sort of thematic coherency or worldbuilding clarity for eye-rolling references to popular musicians and music genres. But god dammit, sometimes this show is so fucking fun. The casts’ vibrant personalities, full of fascinating motivations and unique perspectives on the world, makes for some delightful chemistry, and there’s a curiously compelling can-do spirit buried underneath the confusing philosophy and nonsensical story beats. If there was a coherent show wrapped around this endearing hodgepodge of human inspiration, I think it would’ve been a pretty good time. Hopefully, that’s what Eureka Seven has to offer. So if nothing else, Listeners, thank you for getting me excited to check out what you might’ve been if you were actually good.

My Next Life as a Villainess: 6/10

This is one of those shows where I’m disappointed I didn’t enjoy it more. A rare female-led isekai that trades the noxious male-centric power fantasy for a jovial skewering of otome game conventions? Subverting the expectation of the bitchy villain by making her fight against her prescribed role and become the nicest person on the face of the earth? While acquiring an honest-to-god bisexual harem in the process? The fact that this show is merely enjoyable instead of outright amazing is an insult of the highest caliber. Maybe the adaptation was rushed, maybe the animation needed improvement, maybe there just wasn’t enough space given for the characters to breathe, but I wish it were so much better than it ended up being. That being said, if this ends up sparking a new trend of otome-game iskeai anime- I’m aware this is quite a popular subgenre in the LN market at the moment- then I will happily sing Hamefura’s praises until the end of time. After how abysmal the modern isekai scene has gotten, this could be just the vaccine necessary to save the genre and turn it into a genuinely positive force for modern anime. Don’t let me down now, Bakarina!

Sing Yesterday for Me: 6/10

If you asked me back at the start of the season which show was probably gonna be my favorite, I would’ve chosen Sing Yesterday for Me with no second thoughts. An achingly realistic depiction of the angst of post-college adulthood? Featuring characters who struggled with messy, indelibly human conflicts around relationships and what it truly means to come of age and take control of your life? Animated with stunning fidelity and spectacular character animation by Doga Koba doing their best KyoAni impression to fill the gap while KyoAni gets back on its feet? This had all the makings of a masterpiece. And then, sadly, the plot gets mired in endlessly spinning its wheels, becoming more invested in dragging out a series of cheap “will-they won’t-they” love triangles than contending with the complex emotions at the core of those conflicts. It gradually loses sight of the maturity that made it so striking and eventually settles for just being a better Domestic Girlfriend, leading to a deeply unsatisfying conclusion that isn’t earned at all. Count your lucky stars that the characters remain so compelling and human despite how the plot dicks them around, in no small part thanks to top-tier vocal performances from everyone involved. Sing Yesterday for Me could’ve been something truly special; instead, it settles for merely being decent and disappointing. What a damn shame.

Kakushigoto: 7/10

I don’t know what mad genius decided that it was time for Hiroshi Kamiya to take on the esteemed role of “eccentric father to an adorable little girl,” but I’d like to shake their hand. Kakushigoto is about mangaka Kakushi Goto, who is keeping a big kakushi goto (translation: “secret”) from his daughter: he kakushi gotos (translation: draws) dirty manga for a living. And if you weren’t turned off by that barrage of Intensely Japanese puns, then you’re sure to have a good time with this show. A setup prime for cringe comedy is instead weaponized for a genuinely sweet tale of what it means to be a single parent, exploring how Goto’s lives as a mangaka and a father intersect and clash as he tries to give his precious Hime the best life he can with the limited resources at his disposal. It’s often hilarious, always touching, packed full of colorful characters and difficult-to-translate puns, and absolutely lousy with humorous observations on the nature of being an artist, as well as how it relates to the nature of being a parent. Not all the humor hits the mark, and there are some frustrating aspects you have to eat around- a gay stereotype, a high school girl who falls in love with Goto (don’t worry, it doesn’t go anywhere)- but if you’re in the mood for something soothing, silly, snarky, and just a little bit saccharine, Kakushigoto will do the trick just fine.

[those70scomics]

“Jackie, I checked. No one can see us doing it from the parking lot.” -- Kelso in “Till the Next Goodbye” (7x25).

Can not will.

Can not could.

The line is purposely ambiguous. It might mean Kelso and Jackie have already had sex and she wanted him to makes sure no saw them. Or that she planned on having sex with Kelso and wanted him to make sure no one would see them.

Either way, it’s the line that led to Jackie and Hyde’s end on-screen.

I sometimes think about what I would’ve done had I been hired as the showrunner for season 8. How I would salvage write Jackie and Hyde’s relationship out of the situation season 7 left them from. I’ve come up with different scenarios in fanfic, but I recently thought how I would handle the material if I were a TV show writer, not an author of prose.

Here’s what I came up with.

Season 8, Episode 1

We’re at the Formans’ house. Not only has Hyde been gone for two weeks but Jackie, too. Kelso has remained mum on what happened.

Whenever Kitty, Red, Donna, and Fez try to get Kelso to tell them where Hyde and Jackie are. Kelso just mumbles, “I don’t know,” and changes the subject or leaves.

But with Kitty missing Eric terribly, Red is done letting the kettlehead hide info about the one person who might be able to cheer Kitty up: Hyde. In a callback to “Cat Fight Club” (2x25), Red traps Kelso in the garage, makes him sit on a stool, and interrogates/threatens him in his humorous, veiled fashion.

Kelso, scared for his life, says, “Hyde caught me!”

Red: Caught you doing what?

Kelso: Caught me naked in the motel parking lot! He punched me until I told him me and Jackie weren’t doing it--

Red [growing more annoyed by the breath]: Doing what?

Kelso [panicking]: It! You know, sex.

Red: For Pete’s sake, Kelso! Why the hell would Steven think you and his girlfriend were ... doing that?

Kelso: It. And they were broken up!

Red [threateningly]: Kelso ...

Kelso: Okay, okay! I might’ve been wrapped in only a towel when I went into Jackie’s motel room and said no one could see us doing it from the parking lot, and Hyde might’ve been there when I said it. And he might’ve grabbed my towel and chased me across that parking lot while I was nude. And he kicked my ass really hard, Red! My butt still has bruises.

Red: If you don’t get to the point, I’m gonna shove my foot so hard up your ass until those bruises cry blood.

Kelso: I told Hyde Jackie kept shooting me down. But she was single, and I was naked, and we had a room, so I figured, “Why not keep trying?” I also figured making sure no one could see us doing it from the parking lot would sweeten the deal, but Hyde was there, and--

Red: Where is he now?

Kelso: I keep telling you, I don’t know! He went back to Jackie’s room and locked me out. I had to drive back to Point Place in the nude! I was pulled over and arrested, but the officer took pity on a fellow cop, gave me some pants and a shirt, and I was able to come home.

Red: You ... jeez. What am I gonna tell Kitty?

Kelso: That I’m a hero? I drove across state lines in the nude!

Red: Go home, Kelso.

In the Formans’ living room, Kitty and Donna sit on the couch. They’re making a tape-recording for Eric, who’s in Africa. Donna says into the mic that Hyde’s still missing, and Kitty stops the tape.

Kitty: You can’t tell him that. You’ll only worry him.

Donna: But he already knows Hyde’s missing. I told him in the tape we sent last week.

Kitty: Oh, sweetie, I recorded over that part.

Donna [annoyed]: You listened to my private tape to Eric? You censored it?!

Kitty: A mother does what she must to protect her children. Eric has enough to deal with, adjusting to a new country and food he probably can’t digest. You know how sensitive his stomach is. God knows what they use for toilet paper over there.

Donna: Mrs. Forman, Hyde is Eric’s best friend. He needs to know.

Kitty: And I am Eric’s mother, and I say we tell him nothing about Steven until--

They hear the faint sound of a door slamming. It’s the basement door. Kitty and Donna stare at each other.

Kitty: Do you think?

Familiar laughter reaches them from the basement.

Donna: That’s Jackie’s cackle!

Kitty and Donna rush downstairs. Hyde and Jackie are in the basement, holding hands and being generally lovey-dovey.

Kitty: Oh, my God -- Steven’s come home!

Kitty shoves Jackie aside and thrusts herself into Hyde’s arms. Jackie stumbles but catches herself on the couch. Kitty holds onto Hyde for dear life, like she did Eric in the season 7 finale, but Donna focuses on Jackie.

Donna: Where the hell have you been? I called your number in Chicago two weeks ago, and the motel clerk told me you’d checked out! I even looked up the TV studio where you got that job and called that up, and they said you declined the job.

Jackie: I’m sorry, Donna. I’m sorry. Steven and I--

Hyde [who’s being choked by Kitty’s love]: Jackie -- little help here?

Jackie tries to prise Mrs. Forman’s arm off Hyde but fails. Donna doesn’t act right away, thinking Hyde deserves a little mangling for making them all worry so long. But she eventually helps free him.

Kitty: Where have you two been?

Hyde: Vegas.

Kitty and Donna: Vegas?

Jackie: Steven, give them their gifts.

From his backpack, Hyde hands both Kitty and Donna a mini slot machine. Kitty is momentarily enamored by the gift, but Donna is pissed.

Donna: They don’t have phones in Vegas?

Jackie: We were a little busy, okay?

Donna: Doing what?

Hyde and Jackie look at each other and burst out laughing. Kitty laughs, too, but ...

Kitty: Wait, what’s so funny? What am I missing?

Jackie and Hyde: Nothing.

Hyde: Say, uh ... me and Jackie are kind of tired from the drive. Do you think we could take a nap before we continue the interrogation?

Donna: No! You and Jackie owe us an explanation!

Jackie: We’re fine! See? [She waves her hand over herself and Hyde.] There’s nothing to worry about.

Kitty: They’re fine, Donna. And Steven’s never leaving this house again.

Jackie and Hyde both appear uncomfortable at this statement. Donna catches it. Kitty doesn’t.

Donna: All right, but once you’re up from snooze-land, expect one hell of a questioning.

Kitty: And delicious food. What would you two like for your welcome-home feast?

Hyde: Anything you cook is fine with me, Mrs. Forman. Always has been.

Kitty [touched]: Oh, you are such a sweetheart! And a good eater. [To Donna]: You know, when Mr. Forman was out of a job, the cheapest meat I could find was cow tongue, and Steven ate that as happily as he would filet mignon.

Jackie [to Hyde]: You ate tongue?

Hyde: Yeah. And so have you--

Jackie: I have not!

Hyde quirks up an eyebrow, and Jackie gets his double-meaning; She swats his chest.

Jackie: Okay, whatever. I’m really tired, and I’m taking a nap.

She heads for Hyde’s room, and Hyde hands Mrs. Forman a Vegas-themed beer stein.

Hyde: That’s for Red. Could you tell him I’m back? Not exactly ready for my beating.

Kitty [laughing uncomfortably]: He won’t won’t beat you up. He’s already scared one son off to Africa. I won’t let him scare our other to a different continent.

Hyde: Thanks.

He follows Jackie into his room.

Inside Hyde’s room.

Jackie: Steven, I was so close to telling!

Hyde: But you didn’t. I’m proud of you, grasshopper. [Note: Yes, we’d finally learn Hyde’s pet name for Jackie here.]

Jackie removes a necklace from around her neck. Attached to the chain is an engagement ring and wedding ring. She frees both rings from the chain and puts them on her finger.

Hyde: You sure wearin’ those now is such a good idea?

Jackie: Every second I can’t wear them feels like a year.

Hyde pulls his own wedding ring from under the collar of his shirt. It’s also attached to a chain.

Hyde: I get that. [He grasps Jackie’s left hand.] But at least we’re hitched, right? 

He sits on his cot, and Jackie plunks down on his lap.

Jackie: And we had an amazing honeymoon.

They kiss.

Jackie: How long are we gonna keep our marriage a secret?

Hyde: As long as it takes to save up for the wedding you want. Gettin’ married by an Elvis impersonator in the Hunk of Burning Love Chapel wasn’t exactly your dream.

Jackie: No, but marrying you is.

She caresses his hair, and he gazes at her the way he does during their first scene in “Magic Bus” (6x03). This is a happy man in love.

Hyde: I got an idea. Red’s gonna wanna kill me, right? So how’s about when everyone’s upstairs -- him, Mrs. Forman, Donna, probably Fez; maybe even freakin’ Kelso -- I propose to you like it’s the first time. I’ll make it all story-book and sickening, and that’ll diffuse most of the tension. Red’ll still be pissed, but Mrs. Forman’ll be so damn ecstatic he won’t get a chance to shove his foot up my ass.

Jackie: I love it! [She kisses him again.] And I love you! Oh, Steven, I didn’t think I’d ever be happy.

Hyde: Don’t you mean this happy?

Jackie: No. Happy. Losing you ... it was awful.

Hyde: It was no picnic for me, either.

Jackie: Are you happy?

Hyde [smiling]: Yeah. I am.

They make out. Then, in a slight panic, Jackie pulls away.

Jackie: How are we gonna tell Mrs. Forman we’re gonna move into our own apartment?

Hyde: One problem at a time, baby. One problem at a time.

They continue to make out. The scene fades to black.

The first half of the season follows Jackie and Hyde’s attempts to keep their marriage a secret. To save money, they end up becoming Fez’s roommate. Fez thinks this is great, at first, until he grows more and more suspicious of Jackie and Hyde’s engagement.

As I’ve written about previously, Eric should’ve been kept part of the show, despite Topher Grace’s absence. Episode storylines could involve Kitty, Donna, and others narrating letters Eric sent while we see Eric from the neck down acting out his adventures in Africa. Another story could involve Red, Kitty, Donna, Hyde, Jackie, and Fez figuring out how to celebrate Eric’s birthday in his absence and what gifts to send him.

Donna and Jackie commute to a university in Kenosha. Doesn’t matter that it doesn’t exist in real life. Neither does Point Place.

Fez enters culinary school to become a dessert and candy maker. His and Donna’s friendship develops in ways it never got to in the previous seasons. Fez evolves back to pre-”Everybody Loves Casey” (4x26) Fez, in large part due to his friendship with Donna. He might even become a feminist, having realized the error of his ways. This allows him to find a fulfilling romantic relationship of his own -- with a new character introduced early on at the culinary school.

Hyde continues to work at Grooves and on his relationship with W.B.

Kelso moved to Chicago, as he does in the season 8 we got, since Ashton Kutcher left the show.

The first half of the season concludes with Fez discovering Jackie and Hyde’s wedding rings. He steals borrows them and brings them to Donna, who freaks out with him.

Fez: We have to tell Miss Kitty!

Donna: No, Fez. If Hyde and Jackie got secretly married while they were in Vegas, then we better damn well make sure they did. Mr. and Mrs. Forman were maniacs when they found out about Eric’s and my secret engagement. Hyde being married? And Mrs. Forman not being part of the wedding -- oh, it’s gonna kill her.

Fez: Ai. You’re right. We’ll confront Hyde and Jackie. And if they won’t talk, I’ll threaten to stop making that chocolate souffle they’ve both fallen in love with.

Donna: That souffle really is good.

Fez: Thank you. I add a little coffee powder to give it a mocha kick.

Donna: Wow, you’re really learning a lot in culinary school.

Fez: Yes. Oh! I have an even better idea.

Fez holds up Jackie and Hyde’s wedding rings, nods at them, and laughs.

At Jackie, Hyde, and Fez’s apartment, meanwhile, Jackie is panicking. She can’t find her wedding ring. Hyde tells her to relax. That she probably just left it under a shirt. But he can’t find his either, and he starts to panic.

Jackie: Do you think we’ve been robbed?

Hyde: Nothin’ else seems to have been swiped.

Jackie: Who would take our wedding rings?

Hyde: Who do you think, man? Remember when Forman couldn’t find that man-ring Donna gave him? Fez had it.

Jackie: That little thief! Do you think he’s doing something perverted with them?

Hyde: Considering he’s been dragging Donna to feminist rallies, I doubt it. But whatever he’s doing with ‘em, it can’t be good.

The front door opens then, and Fez and Donna walk in, each carrying a metal cloche.

Fez: Hello.

Jackie rushes him and grasps his shirt collar.

Jackie: Where are they?

Fez: Where are what?

Jackie: You know what!

Donna: Jackie, back off. Fez and I are carrying something very delicate for his culinary school.

Hyde: For? Not from?

Jackie backs off. Fez and Donna pull off the covers of their cloches, revealing two chocolate souffles.

Fez and Donna: Tah-dah!

Hyde: Are those...?

Fez: Yes, your new favorite dessert. And inside is a surprise you and Jackie might not want to eat.

Jackie [catching on]: You didn’t...

Donna [goading]: Like you and Hyde didn’t?

Hyde [trying to be aloof]: Didn’t what?

Donna: You know what you did.

Fez: And I know what I did.

Jackie: Screw this!

She grabs Fez’s cloche, puts it on the coffee table, and she digs through the souffle with her hands, a callback to “The Promise Ring” (3x25). She pulls out her wedding ring.

Jackie: You baked my wedding ring in a souffle?

Donna: Ah-hah! So you and Hyde did get married!

Hyde: All that proves is she bought herself a wedding ring.

Jackie [who’s started licking souffle off her fingers]: Damn , that’s good.

Donna: Nice try, Hyde.

She moves her souffle under his nose. He can’t help himself and grabs it. He tears into it like Jackie did hers, licks his fingers in the process, and finds his wedding ring. Knowing the jig is up, he and Jackie put their chocolate-coated rings on their fingers.

Jackie: Fine. So you know. What do you want?

Donna: To know why!

Fez: Yes! I was supposed to be a best man or maid of honor -- your pick!

Hyde [continuing to eat the souffle]: Look, me and Jackie had a hell of a rough time before Forman left. We just needed to pull the trigger and get hitched so we could quit worrying about that crap.

Jackie: Yes. Now Steven and I can live our lives without all the drama.

Fez: Without drama? [To Donna, hurt, and gesturing to the souffles] Was this not dramatic?

Donna: It was, Fez. Very dramatic [To Hyde and Jackie.] But you’re in for a Shakespearean tragedy when Mrs. Forman finds out you got married without her.

Jackie: No, we’re not because she’s not going to find out. As far as she and Mr. Forman and the rest of the world are concerned, Steven and I are engaged and saving money for our wedding. Which isn’t completely untrue.

Hyde: Yup. We’re savin’ up for wedding number two, where everyone’s invited and Jackie gets her doves.

Donna: Where did you two get married anyway?

Hyde: The--

Jackie: Steven, don’t.

Donna and Fez: “Steven,” do. 

Hyde: How’s about I just show ‘em the picture?

Jackie: Oh, God. It’s a Polaroid!

Donna: This I have to see.

Jackie [to Hyde]: Wash your hands first!

Hyde heads to the kitchen sink as the scene fades to black.

Next scene essentially continues where the last one left off. Fez and Donna are studying the framed Polaroid of Jackie and Hyde kissing after being pronounced husband and wife.

Donna [laughing]: The Hunk of Burning Love Chapel?

Fez [angry]: Elvis married you, and I wasn’t’ invited?

Jackie: Fez, I didn’t even get to wear a wedding dress.

Hyde: I wanted Zeppelin, but "Elvis” sang freakin’ “Love Me Tender”.

Jackie: It was either that or “Jailhouse Rock,” and that wasn’t gonna happen.

Donna: Okay, so you had a cheesy wedding. ... Man, I wish someone had video taped it. [Refocusing.] Anyway, so you’re gonna have a big second wedding, right?

Jackie: My dream wedding. Steven promised.

Hyde: And our first dance is gonna be to one of the mushier Zeppelin songs. That’s our compromise.

Fez: And I will be your best man ... [looks at Jackie] or your maid of honor.

Jackie: Actually, I wanted Donna to be my maid of honor.

Donna [touched]: Me?

Jackie: Who else? You’re my best friend. Plus, I’ll look even more stunning standing next to a giant lumberjack wearing a bright purple taffeta gown.

Donna: I won’t wear that.

Jackie: Then you’ll be naked.

Hyde: As naked as Kelso was driving home from Chicago.

Donna and Fez: What?!

Hyde: That’s a story for another time. Fez, it’d be cool if you’d be one of my groomsmen, man. Forman’s the best man ‘cause he’s my best bud.

Donna: So you’re going to wait until Eric comes home from Africa?

Hyde: He’s only got eight months left to go. We can wait.

Fez: Well, I can’t. Every time Miss Kitty looks at me, your secret will knock on my teeth, and I’m afraid I’ll answer.

Jackie: Then avoid Mrs. Forman the next eight months.

Fez: But Miss Kitty and I have become very close.

Jackie: Okay, how about this. If you keep your big mouth shut, I’ll let you be a bride’s man. That means you can help me with wedding stuff and help Donna plan the wedding shower.

Fez: I can? Okay, maybe I can keep this secret.

Jackie: Good. Now ... if you ever bake Steven’s and my wedding rings into a dessert again,  [smiles threateningly] I’ll bake your ‘nads into a pie. Understand?

Fez [voice squeaky]: Understood, understood.

The second half of season 8 finds Jackie, Hyde, Donna, Fez, and Kitty planning Jackie and Hyde’s second wedding -- which Kitty thinks is the first wedding. Both Fez and Donna make slip-ups they have to cover, but Kitty doesn’t catch on.

All this wedding planning, though, makes Donna miss Eric even more. Kitty shares all of this with Eric via the cassette tapes she records for him.

Fez’s relationship with his culinary school sweetheart develops.

Kitty, inspired by Jackie and Hyde’s wedding plans, suggests to Red they renew their vows. He vetoes this, reminding him how “well” that worked out for Bob and Midge. But he’s been saving up money for a second honeymoon, which he will reveal later in the season.

Eric writes Hyde a letter, telling him that he’s coming home for a New Year’s Eve visit. He can’t stand being away from Donna any longer. He asks Hyde to keep this a secret, but Hyde tells Jackie their wedding date has just moved up by a few months.

The hour-long season finale consists of Jackie and Hyde’s second wedding. Eric comes home in time to be Hyde’s best man, and the wedding is as romantic and funny as it should be. W.B. and Angie are there, of course, too.

But as Jackie and Hyde kiss as in, “You may now kiss the bride,” Eric says beside Red, “Wow, I bet this wedding was a whole lot nicer than than their first.”

Red: Their first?

Eric: Yeah, when they got married at the Hunk of Burning Love Chapel in Vegas.

Red [shouting as Steven and Jackie pass him by, stopping Hyde by the arm]: You got married in Las Vegas?

Kitty: What? [She grabs Jackie’s arm.] You two were married already? For almost a year?

Jackie: Kind of?

Hyde [pissed]: Nice job, Forman! The one time I ask you to keep a secret.

Jackie [to Hyde]: You told Eric? How could you?

Hyde: I wrote him a letter. Hey, it was hard keepin’ this to myself. I figured he was in Africa. Who the hell was he gonna tell?

Jackie: Apparently everyone!

Red: Well, it doesn’t matter now. Either way, you’re both married, and you had a nice wedding. Let’s go have a nice reception.

Kitty: Wait just one minute. What I’m about to say goes not just to Steven and Jackie but to you, Eric, and you, Donna, and you, Fez. When any of you get pregnant, you’re not to keep the baby a secret until she’s already graduating from college. You will tell me the second you know. Do you hear me?

Hyde, Jackie, Donna, and Fez: Yes, ma’am.

Eric: Technically, men can’t get pregnant, so this doesn’t apply--

Kitty: The second you’re with child, Eric!

Eric: Yes, ma’am.

Jackie and Hyde laugh and kiss. Donna kisses Eric. Red and Kitty also kiss. Fez and his girlfriend are kissing, too. It’s a kiss-party before everyone heads to the reception.

The series ends, but the characters’ adventures in life continue.