#pegapersonal

[pega-chan]

i have a smush on the FWB who rejected me and just now i found myself hostile to the idea that they could be having sex with someone else. i need to touch grass

[pega-chan]

3. the extent of a character's personality being how hard they simp for their crush

4. the (often lackluster) romantic subplot completely overtaking the a-plot

5. the protagonist having a best friend who only exists to drive the romantic subplot between the protagonist and their love interest (i.e. helping the protagonist get together with their crush, or leaving them alone together) and nothing else

6. love triangles (and by extent, love squares). just. no.

List of things I hated in movies growing up:

1. When a character would give up their dream or some big opportunity that they wanted to be with their romantic love.

2. When the end of the movie comes along with LITTERALLY EVERY SINGLE character romantically pairing up with someone, even if there had never been chemistry, just so that no one was left single.

In conclusion, I should’ve known I was aro sooner

[pega-chan]

"you can't only be friends with aspecs" at least my aspec friends understand amatonormativity and are actively combatting it! at least i know they will not unceremoniously leave our friendship to crumble if they get into a committed relationship! i'm not against being friends with allos but there is less certainty that they would respect the friendship we have in lieu of a committed relationship and i'm not wrong of being wary of that unless they're already unpacking the amatonormative beliefs they were fed and work against them!!

[pega-chan]

i'm not fully out irl—for me the closet i reside in is made of glass. it's not like i hide being aromantic, but you wouldn't know unless you asked (or if you recognize any of my assorted aro pride accessories). i recognize this is privileged in of itself, mostly because i live in a country where aromanticism is so far from mainstream consciousness and amatonormativity is so thick that the idea of someone not experiencing romantic attraction is unfathomable to local society. but there is a time and place where i choose to be the most visible aromantic around, and that is the local city Women's March. an intersectional feminist event where queer people can voice their concerns is the closest thing to a Pride parade around here.

even though i had attended the march consistently since high school, last weekend was the first time i joined since the pandemic (they had one last year too but i couldn't make it). it was special bc this was the first march i attended with my giant aro flag draped around my shoulders. not only was i carrying one of the only Pride flags there, two separate aspecs went up to me and signalled they were aspec too. the first excitedly flashed me their ace of spades necklace and expressed how rare it was to come across another aspec in the wild. we even found out we attended the same university, so they were nearer than i thought! the second, who was part of the Women's March crew, tapped me on the shoulder and told me they loved my flag while pointing out their aro pin on their bag. we both squealed and exchanged Instagram accounts.

i guess what i'm trying to say was, it was worth being visibly aromantic. it was lovely seeing people's eyes light up when they recognize my flag, and the warm fuzzy feeling inside when they socialize with you. perhaps that's why i never hesitate to display my aro pins and keychains on my bag—it is something so heartwarming to be the beacon of hope that signals to others in your community that they are not alone. they could never take away my aspec pride, and they certainly can't take away my drive to be an aspec safe space. aspec visibility matters <2

[pega-chan]

I would like to formally apologise to my hamster, Krispy, though I wouldn't be surprised if he's managed to hack into my phone,

Imagine how awkward it would be if your pet went on your phone and find the 1000s of pictures you have of them sleeping

[pega-chan]

ngl being aroallo finally made me see the appeal of kpop boy groups

[pega-chan]

so what does it say about my social circle when the aplatonics in it are better friends than my alloplatonic friends

[pega-chan]

bro baru ngeh aku satu server ama author Webtoon Boyfriends???

[pega-chan]

ooh matched with a cute masc-presenting person on Bumble. i know they tend to be red flags but i can't help swooning

[pega-chan]

Jumbo just beat Disney as the most watched animated movie in Indonesia and Southeast Asia. i know the Mouse is TWEAKING rn

[pega-chan]

i'm romance ambivalent but these days i feel like i've reverted back to my old romance-repulsed self

[pega-chan]

ugh just watched the music video for Selalu Ada di Nadimu and cried again. this movie!!

[pega-chan]

i gotta say Jumbo really revived my inner animation nerd. not only is it such a well-crafted film but i sat through the entire end credits squealing as i recognised several animation studios who were involved in its production. my heart is warm.

[pega-chan]

i'll be honest as a bisexual sometimes i feel like a fake sapphic bc i've had bad experiences with women and that has caused me to have a preference for men. not saying i don't have bad experiences with men and mascs (most of my sexual experiences regardless of gender have ended badly) but so far i've had worse sexual experiences with women. at this point i can only ever be friends with other sapphics with no sexual element whatsoever bc i'm so damn traumatized

[pega-chan]

i think part of why i just can't get behind the fantasy of romance books is that getting together for the main couple is based solely on chemistry and almost never compatibility. like sure chemistry is important but you won't know if you'll last with this person if you aren't compatible. and it's hard to write a story where they find out if they are while still keeping it natural.