#pls reply with your memes

[meteorshcts]

reverse inbox call! like or reply to this post and i'll go through your meme tag and send u stuff <3

[erabundus]

if i answer ... ten asks today ... i will allow myself to buy another enamel pin.

[chiropterx]

Despite attempts at reblogging sinday memes, Kirk absolutely has no interest what with still being smitten with Francine and that he's one of the most vanilla guys in the bedroom you could imagine.

[masquenoire]

✿  (they haven't necessarily interacted yet but ... anyways ...)

PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP MEME 0.2

“Whatcha gonna do, kill me? As if! Bats, birds - I don’t give a fuck. I’ll break your wings all the same.”

FRIENDSHIP.     childhood friends  /  work buddies or coworkers  /  family friends  /  friends with benefits  /  smoking buddies  /  adventure buddies  /  fake friends  /  recently friends  /  party buddies  /  friendship of need  /  dying friendship  /  circumstantial friendship  /  partners in crime  /  old friendship  /  [ your muse ] is the good influence  /  [ your muse ] is the bad influence  /  [ my muse ] is the good influence  /  [ my muse ] is the bad influence  /  opposites attract  /  ride or die  /  frenemies  /  roommates or flatmates  /  penpals  /  exes to friends  /  enemies to friends  /  other

ROMANCE.     childhood sweethearts  /  [ your muse is mines ] childhood crush  /  [ my muse is yours ] childhood crush  /  exes  /  exes to lovers  /  forbidden lovers  /  highschool sweethearts  /  secret relationship  /  opposites attract  /  long distance  /  unrequited [ from your muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from my muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from both sides ]  /  skinny love  /  friends to lovers  /  enemies to lovers  /  spurious relationship  /  power couple  /  newly entered  /  soulmates [ metaphorical ]  /  soulmates  [ literal ]  /  awkward  /  turning toxic  /  toxic love  /  cheating [ on your muse ]  /  cheating [ with your muse ]  /  other

FAMILIAL.     siblings [ half ]  /  siblings [ step ]  /  [ my muse ] is an older sibling figure to your younger sibling figure  /  [ my muse ] is a younger sibling figure to your older sibling figure muse  /  [ my muse ] is a parental figure to yours  /  [ my muse ] is a child figure to your muse  /  guardian figure  /  legal guardian  /  adoptive child  /  foster child  /  [ your muse ] is taken under mines wing (maybe in a very twisted au?)  /  [ my muse ] is taken under yours wing  /  other

ANTAGONISTIC.     dangerous to each other  /  dangerous to others  /  unpredictable  /  rivals  /  petty  /  developing into sexual or romantic tension  /  based off family matters (I guess?? Black Mask and the Batfam ain’t friends)  /  based of off circumstance  /  based of professional matters  /  based off misunderstanding or lies  /  conflict of ideology  /  betrayal  /  hero - villain dynamic  /  enemies  /  fight club  /  friends turned enemies  /  lovers turned enemies  /  exes turned enemies  /  other

[ahogedetective]

monomono !! :D

{ monomomo surprise!!! 🎁 ❓}

Absolute Tuning Fork

A huge tuning fork that hides the power to destroy the entire world with resonance, if used by someone who has mastered the art of tuning. It’s also good for drying out laundry.

"................. ............... ............" He has the most baffled look on his face. Why......was something like this in the capsule machine....he wonders.... "..................Hakuno........ please. Let me re-roll for you. I personally do not think you would want to risk accidentally destroying the entire world if you tried tuning this thing, nor would I want you having such a dangerous item. Not because I don't trust you with it, but I care about you and would be very sad if something bad happened to you. You can dry out your laundry using much safer equipment. Is that okay? Okay."

[pathstheychoose]

Reverse meme call! Specify a muse or be victim to muse roulette!

[19calicos]

street style – oikawa tooru ୭ ˚. ᵎᵎ

tell me, lately, do i drive you crazy?

he's out in shibuya in his best clothes every night hoping to spot them, just so he can prove that he's more than a bad outfit turned into a viral meme.

status: in development, coming soon

content: streetwear photographer! yn x influencer! oikawa, gn reader with theythem pronouns, both yn and oikawa are internet famous, slowburn, strangers to one-sided enemies to lovers, university au, oikawa chasing yn, sassy but down bad oikawa

warnings: language, kms/kys/die jokes, usage of weed + alc + cigs, stan twitter and the damn internet lmfaooo, some miscommunication, fears of perception + social anxiety themes, feelings will be played with

tags are added as story progresses, please check cw on individual chapters!

( ✶ ) denotes written portions.

say hello! – cuntology degree havers & tofu not tooru

table of contents:

1 ₊⁺ an ultimatum

2 ₊⁺ tba

taglist: open! (27/50)

send an ask/reply to join & pls check your visibility settings!

divider by @/plutism :-)

[lewisvinga]

stay away ! | pablo gavi x fem! real madrid player! ! reader

summary; after their relationship goes public, pablo has to face threats from a certain team over his girlfriend, the baby of the team

fc; carla camacho

warnings; ?

notes; requested ! MY REQUESTS ARE CLOSED 🤒😫😫

masterlist !

yourusername uploaded to their story !

[caption 1; hubba hubba pablogavi ] [caption 2; mi amor 🩷]

lindacaicedo__11 replied to your story !

lindacaicedo__11 q es esto ??? [what is this ???]

atheeneeaa_10 replied to your story !

atheeneeaa_10 uuuuhmmmm,,,, y/n??

vinijr replied to your story !

vinijr y/n?? why are you dating a b*rca player ??????

carolineweir95 replied to your story !

carolineweir95 since when have you been in a relationship????

carolineweir95 with someone from the rival team too????

pablogavi replied to your story !

pablogavi couldn’t even ease ur teammates into knowing, just a straight hard launch 😭😭😭

yourusername i like to give them heart attacks for funsies sometimes 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️

yourusername they’re already going crazy, even vini😭😭😭

pablogavi yeah if a barca femeni player was dating one of ur guys i’d question ur morals and thought process🤒

yourusername so he’s right for questioning my morals and thought process 🤔🤔

pablogavi no your morals are right bc ur dating me 😁😁😁

liked by pablogavi, linda__caicedo11, and others !

yourusername: what a long but exciting week 🥸

tagged; judebellingham, carolineweir95, linda__caicedo11

pablogavi: 😍😍😍 liked by yourusername !

pablogavi: siempre tan bella [always so beautiful]

yourusername: 🥹🫶

olgacarmona7: she’s a child.

yourusername: we’re the same age olga

pablogavi: we’re the same age tho🤨

atheeneeaa_10: STAY AWAY FROM HER🤺

username: it’s like that one demi lovato meme 😭😭😭

username: the scars on her leg 🙁

username: LINDAAA

username: omg jude

username: starboy and stargirl of real madrid iktr

judebellingham: nah why do i look so awkward

yourusername: just a bit 😕😕

lindacaicedo__11: 😋👍

yourusername: 😁

username: the way the squad is so protective of her is so 😭😭

username: y/n acting like nothing happened after hard launching her relationship w gavi is the level of idgaf i aspire to be at 🤭

liked by pablogavi, sofie.svava, and others !

yourusername: 🤍🤍

tagged; pablogavi

paablogavi: think ❤️💙 is a better combo😁

sofie.svava: no.

yourusername: you’re on thin ice , babe , very thin

kathellensousa: stay away🤺🤺

pablogavi: always supporting the loml 😁❤️💙

yourusername: always supporting the loml too😁🤍🤍

username: not them using their team color for hearts im 😭😭

username: i’m a culer but omg i love y/n sm😞😞

username: pls i love them

username: football’s power couple fr 😍

frejaolofssonn: ouuuu girl….

judebellingham: exactly what i said 🙄🙄🙄

camavinga:🙄🙄🙄🙄

yourusername: i can say a lot abt u three watch it 🙄

carolineweir95: as long as you’re happy 😕😕

pablogavi: she is😁

lindacaicedo__11: let her speak for herself 😒

yourusername: you’re all drama queens 😭

liked by yourusername, pedri, and others !

pablogavi: mi amor ❤️‍🩹

tagged; yourusername

yourusername: amorrrrr🫶🫶

yourusername: tqqq🥹 [ily]

pablogavi: tqqqq❤️

username: she’s so cute :(

username: the 2nd pic…. MIGHT go crazy idk

pedri: simp

pablogavi: and proud 😌

olgacarmona7: i mean….. she looks happy :/

lindacaicedo__11: i guess this is ok

sofie.svava: barley ok let’s be fr

judebellingham: sigh….

pablogavi: 🤨🤨

yourusername: shhhh they’re slowly going into the acceptance phase

username: jude wyd here

atheeneeaa_10: watch your back if i see a single hint of sadness come from her bc of you.

pablogavi: aye aye 🫡

username: sad day for the gavi girls 🕊️🕊️

username: i ADORE them

username: they’re so😞😞

username: Y/NNNNNNN

username: enemies to lovers fr

username: the merengue x culer combo goes hard tbh

[7ndipity]

How They Text

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: What the members texting habits would be like with their crush or S/o

Warnings: slightly suggestive 

A/N: thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! I hope you like it!

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin: Jin I think is a very simplistic, but teasing texter. He’ll ask for your opinion on random things like “What should I get for lunch?” only to quip back like two minutes later with “wrong answer, I’m ordering chicken”. If you’re just in the flirty/crush stage, he tries to leave a bit of time in between texts, but once you’re dating, he texts regularly throughout the day about whatever he’s doing or thinking of “Do you think I’d look good with purple hair?”

Yoongi: I think Yoongi texts quite frequently, tho sometimes it’s only a *thumbs up emoji* He’s a man of slightly fewer words, and his texts reflect that, most of them being single word messages like “Dinner??” “Morning” “Missyou(intentionally written as one word like he’s mumbling)”. Every now and then tho, you’ll get one of his 2am, multi-paragraph messages about how much he cares for you and how much you mean to him🥺

Hobi: Hobi is consistent, responding quickly to all your messages, regardless of where you are relationship-wise. He makes sure to text you everyday, even if it’s just “Good morning!😊” and “Goodniiiiigt😘” so you know that he’s thinking of you. He also sends lots of playful selfies of his daily routine with teasing little captions like “bet you wish you were here” with a pic of him getting coffee or hanging out at rehearsals. He also randomly sends sweet little notes about how he’s thinking about you or how he misses you, especially if he’s traveling/on tour.

Namjoon: I think he texts a little inconsistently. If he’s home and in his usual routine, he texts you multiple times throughout the day, but if he’s busy or traveling, he tends to lose track of time and forgets til you text first. I think he prefers talking on the phone or in person, so he mainly texts to send updates abt his day/schedule. I feel like he texts a lot when he’s needy/horny, so if he’s suddenly really quick answering your messages, you know what’s up👀

Jimin: Jimin is a very cutesy texter, with lots of “<3”s and “smooch”s following whatever he says. He sends lots of lil reminders to look after yourself like “It’s cold today, don’t forget your jacket” or “I know you’re busy w work/school, but pls make sure to eat dinner”. He likes to play hard to get now and then, sending flirty little comments and then intentionally leaving you on ‘sent’ for a lil bit just to try and make you antsy, but if you do the same to him, he will get soo sulky 

Taehyung: I see Tae being semi-inconsistent with his texts. He’s the type to send you multiple texts in a row, but then once you respond, it takes him like an hour to reply back with just a“Yea”😑 He tends to get somewhat needy/sentimental in the evenings before bed, sending cute lil comments and scenarios like “we should buy a house somewhere by the ocean, that way we can go for walks on the beach whenever we want” “My bed’s not nearly as comfy w/o you to cuddle😔"

Jungkook: He’s a famously bad texter, leaving everybody on read constantly or taking half a day minimum to reply, but I like to think he would be more attentive if it’s from his crush or S/o(getting prompt answers from him is definitely a partner privilege) He tends to mostly send memes, but when he’s drunk, he texts a lot, rambling about how much he likes you and things he wants to do with you. They’re mostly innocent, but there’s definitely a few things that are a bit spicier too😳

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @classicalelephant @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @comingupwithacoolnameishard @universal-travel-er @bo0ghol @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[sweetlummie]

Incoming Call…

Tysm to my sweetest heart @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog for making this AMAZING mood board!

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

Joel Miller x fem!plus size!reader

A/n: I’m back! I took a break from writing to focus on college classes. Just taking one last class before I get my associates! Big s/o to @romanarose for proofreading! Any dialogue in italics are text messages! This fic was made with game!joel and show!joel in mind! As always feel free to leave constructive criticism. Likes, comments, and reposts are appreciated 🫶🫶🫶💗

Warnings: cyber stalking, age gap (reader is in college), virgin!reader, if anything else pls lmk!

W/c: 1.3k+

* ・‥…━━━━━━━ *˖◛⁺♡ ━━━━━━━…‥・

Joel Miller. A rugged older man. He was so pretty in your eyes but the age difference between you both shattered any illusion you could have with him. So you admired from afar, bashfully smiling at him when he looked your way. You were neighbors so you saw each other quite a bit. He always was sure to greet you every time you were outside when he was. When you’d leave for classes, when you’d come back, when you’d go off to work, and when you’d go out with your friends. Joel always made sure to be around just to see your pretty face. Joel liked you, a lot. He wasn’t tech savvy but he knew his way around some social media platforms so he was able to find your Instagram quite easily and stalk you on there. He used your pictures as fap material.

“Oh sweet girl... such pretty eyes an’ lips...” he’d groan as he’d pump his throbbing, thick cock while looking at your most recent Instagram post. This was an everyday thing, looking at your profile and jerking off. He couldn’t even catch a glimpse of you in person without feeling his cock harden in his pants, unbeknownst to you.

One day you’re out in your front yard, watching your father work on your car. He saw you from the window and immediately went out, using the excuse to get his mail even though he had already gotten it earlier. He overheard your conversation with your father. Your dad would often talk sports to you, and even though you have no clue what he’s talking about you still liked to listen. You were a sweet girl like that. Joel cuts in and adds to the conversation. You try not to say much because you’re sure your high pitched voice would give away your nerves, but you couldn’t help it- he made you so nervous. Joel on the other hand took in your body. He eyed you up and down, from your breasts to your soft, fat stomach, and all the way down to your juicy thighs. His cock was already throbbing. He needed you.

The conversation between Joel and your father shifted into something you were into. Wrestling. You got excited and joined in the conversation. Joel, of course, after his stalking, knew you loved wrestling so he made sure to look into the topic, just for you. Eventually your father dropped the conversation but you still kept talking with Joel, your eyes sparkling as you spoke with such passion about the sport. Joel enjoyed this, he loved your eyes. He can’t help but think how cute you’d look with your lips around his cock, looking up at him with those same sparkly eyes.

After a bit, you both decided that the Texas sun was getting too much so you said your goodbyes to head inside. You paused for a moment, it couldn’t hurt to give Joel your Instagram. After all, he likes wrestling and you post a lot of wrestling videos on your story and you get a lot of memes too you’re sure he’d enjoy! So you look over at him before he goes inside. “Hey Joel?” You called out. He glanced over at you. “Yeah sweetheart?” He replied as he turned, walking back toward the fence. “Do you have Instagram?” You asked as you stepped forward. “Sure do, what for, sweet thing?” These nicknames were gonna be the end of you.. “I just wanted it so I can send you wrestling videos…” you say bashfully, he nods and you pull out your phone. He gives you his username and you follow him. You then said your farewells and went inside. 

You looked at his profile, he didn’t have any posts and on his bio it just had his age and “Texas” on it. You laughed to yourself, he was such an old man. You add him to your close friends. You wanna show yourself off to him. You posted selfies a lot, sometimes even showing your cleavage. You wanted to test the waters so you post a provocative picture of yourself on your close friends. Now you wait. See if he’ll take the bait.

Joel views your page again and sees extra posts and stories that he hasn’t had access to before. He looks at your story and sees the picture of you showing off your tits, he groans and pulls out his cock. He decides to risk it. He replies to the story. “You’re such a naughty thing sweetheart.” He sends. You receive the message, making you shoot up from your bed. Your face was hot and you can feel yourself getting wet.

“Guess I am, does that make you uncomfortable Mr. Miller?” You send back. 

When Joel gets the message he’s choking his cock with his big hand, moaning your name. “Not at all princess.. wish I could see more though..” it’s very risky but fuck it, he’s all in. 

When you receive the message you’ve already pulled off your pj shorts and panties, teasing your fat pussy, imagining Joel’s big hands on you instead. You moan and send him a voice memo, “maybe you can Joel… video chat is always an option..” you say in a sultry voice as the squelching of your wet pussy can be heard in the message as well. 

Joel almost passed out with how needy you sounded, he could’ve came right then and there. He hits the video chat icon and rings you up. You reply and are met with Joel, lazily stroking his big cock. You gasp, you’ve never seen one that big or thick before. 

He grins, “hey pretty girl.. touchin’ your sweet lil’ pussy thinkin’ of me?” He teases making you whimper, you nod and pan the camera down to show your wet pussy. He groans and speeds his hand up. “Touch yourself baby, make yourself cum on those pretty lil’ fingers.” You obey and rub your clit faster, moaning softly. “Good girl..” he praised. “Now insert a finger, I bet ya lil’ pussy feels empty, hm baby?” He commanded.

You shake your head. “Hurts when I try to put a finger in...” you tell him shyly. He pauses… no way you were a virgin. 

“Fuck baby... don’ say that... gonna make me shoot my load and I wanna enjoy this..” he pants.

“Sorry...” you apologize, feeling stupid. Of course he wouldn’t like that.. you were sure he wanted a woman with more experience… you stopped masturbating and pulled your hand away in embarrassment. 

“No no baby, keep goin’.. don’ apologize.. thas jus fine… jus means I’m gonna be the one to deflower ya ..” He’s quick to reassure you, so you perk up right, your pussy gushing again. 

“Yes sir...” you say, feeling better about your lack of experience and excited for Joel to be your first. “Now keep touchin, your pussy… an’ show me those pretty lil’ tits baby..” he orders. You smile and pull your tank top down, showing him your breasts. You touch yourself again, listening to him moan and the lewd sounds his cock was making and seeing how big he is and how beautiful he looks when he’s about to cum, pushes you over the edge. You press your thighs together trapping your hand as you moan out his name. He comes shortly after you, his cum shooting out and landing on his soft tummy. 

“Fuck baby doll… that was so good… how ‘bout we meet later and I can finally see that beautiful body of yours in action hm?” He proposes as he languidly strokes his now softening cock. 

“M’kay.. I’d like that..'' You smile at him as you bring the camera up to show him your sweet face and tits. 

“Good girl.. see ya then.” With that the call ends.. you’re over the moon right now, you can’t believe what just happened. Finally you had the man you’ve been craving.

* ・‥…━━━━━━━ *˖◛⁺♡ ━━━━━━━…‥・

[monzamash]

possessive!Carlos is one of my absolute faves, so no. 27 for him pls?

27. “i'm not jealous, you're just mine.” rating – mature 18+ (smut, swearing, possessive language, google translated spanish because i'm an uncultured swine) word count – 1.3k a/n – look, i love carlos - think he's gorgeous, but i struggled ya'll. i've learned a lot from writing this so that's something! hopefully you enjoy it x masterlist

The softest giggle you’d been suppressing slipped past your tightly zipped lips, your body completely betraying you as you read over the text you’d just received – a stupid but insanely cute dog meme from your new work colleague, who just happened to be a man.

The reason you tried to quash your amusement was sitting right beside you, huffing every time your phone vibrated between the two of you on the lounge, completely taking you away from him and into your screen. And you sympathised. If the tables were turned, tables would’ve physically been thrown upside down.

You and Carlos were fiery and the passion had been palpable from the moment you locked eyes at a mutual friends wedding – he could blame it on his Spanish heritage but you had nothing. Nada. You were hot headed, strong willed and stubborn, which was why you couldn’t just ignore someone because he didn’t like it. Hell, you almost wanted to do it more whenever his thick eyebrows furrowed and he peeked over at your phone silently. Nosily.

“That better not be the work friend again,” He murmured under his breath, eyes now back on the mounted television that was lighting up the dark room.

“He’s just being silly, darling – relax and watch your game,” You soothed in response, hands still cradling your phone as Carlos grumbled and turned his eyes back to the Real Madrid vs Man City match filling the now awkward silence.

That was until your phone started ringing, your mystery friend’s caller ID in bold letters spelling, Cameron popped up and caught the full, undivided attention of your otherwise sweet, unruffled significant other. And he wasn’t happy – you could almost say he was seeing red. Before you could decline the call and salvage the situation, Carlos lunged over the discarded bowl of corn chips and snatched your phone, eyes black and uncompromising.

Hello? No she’s busy right now having dinner with her boyfriend. Yes she has a boyfriend… Carlos’ eyes narrowed, fuming that you'd failed to mention him and you shrugged, the one sided conversation giving you way more entertainment than the football playing in the background. No, you cannot call her back. Call ended.

“You done?” Your question came out a little more vexed than intended. Carlos’ head snapped your way, eyes darker than the night sky above as he flipped your phone back into your lap with a scoff.

“I think he got the message, no?” He muttered, arm slinging around your shoulders and resting on the couch behind, closing the gap between you. Possessively.

“And I think you’re an arsehole.”

“Ahh, I’m not an arsehole. I’m just making him know what’s what. No worries.” He replied, nonchalantly as if he hadn’t just totally crossed the line with your co-worker and made you feel like an idiot.

“You making him ‘know what’s what’ makes you look like a possessive dick, baby and I know you’re not like that normally so what the hell? Is it because you’re jealous? You’re jealous aren’t you!?

Carlos was beyond exasperated now, hands flailing about expressively as he tried to conjure some kind of response – but coming up short as his temper started to take over. He wasn’t possessive by nature but he didn’t like people taking what was his, especially not the woman he’d chosen to spend the rest of his life with. Not on his fucking watch.

“No soy!” I'm not was all he could come up with and you were unconvinced, wickedly grinning as you slung your leg over his lap, straddling his hips and literally pinning him down for an answer.

“Yes you are – I can see it in those dark, mysterious eyes,” You teased, cracking his stoic façade little by little.

Carlos huffed and toyed with the hem of you skirt that was mocking, eyes glued to the dip of your waist, begging to be gripped. And so he did, firmly, holding you in place and ever so slightly rocking you forward, tauntingly. The mood had shifted – you both knew that but you still wanted him to admit that he was envious of not having your full attention, it turned you on thinking that he’d ruin any man who ever put a move on you. On his.

“I’m not jealous, mi amor.” Carlos started, fingers skimming down your inner thighs, “It’s just you’re mine – and I’m yours. Simple como eso.” Simple as that.

It was hard to hide the smirk tugging on the corners of your lips, internally cheering your small victory but he sounded so genuine, too sweet to gloat and he was speaking truth. “All yours.”

Carlos hummed in agreement as you felt the pad of his thumb brush over your clit – the rough, sudden circles causing your mouth to fall open in a moan. You fell forward and rested your forehead on his, trying to form a coherent thought but coming up with absolutely nothing except soft moans, the only noise you could muster before your lips were seized, captured by his. Soft kisses turned to desperate ones, deeper ones as you freed him from the confines of his shorts – the Ferrari logo looking better on the floor than on his thigh.

“So pretty on your knees for me.” Carlos’s husky voice rang through your ears, mouth watering from the anticipation, “Where you belong.”

Mmm-hmm, you hummed, mouth full and eyes watering as you took every inch he had for you, tongue wagging. A hoarse moan tumbled from his throat as he occupied yours, loving nothing more than watching Carlos unravel and succumb to the pleasure that your lips were so graciously giving him. Sharp panting, fingernails digging into your skull and the tight grip on the crown of your head were all tell-tale signs that he was right in that sweet spot. Ascending to heaven. 

Mutterings of thick Spanish tumbled from his parted lips as he fucked your mouth, chasing his high, head banging back against the lounge. Mierda, he whispered, spilling all over your tongue before he slid down your throat again, now pushing you to the limit. You gagged, and looked up through hooded eyes, observing the man you loved completely under your control.

One last languid snap of the hips and he was done. You could tell he satisfied with his work as he peered down and watched as you licked your salty lips, mascara and sweat staining your flushed cheeks. You were fucked and you looked it as his fingertips brushed over your tensed jaw, Gracias.

Carlos tenderly interlocked your hands in his and carefully tugged you back into his lap, desperate to taste himself on your tongue. And you happily obliged, snaking your arms around his shoulders and sinking into his warm embrace, lips intensely locked.

“I have a secret to tell you,” You finally mumbled, pulling apart and taking a deep, revitalising breath. Your fingers were entrenched in his thick locks of hair – combing them back into place after all the tugging he’d done during his frenzied high.

Carlos hummed, eternally eager to know all of your secrets, “We’re having dinner with Cameron and his husband next week so that'll be interesting now, won't it?”

It took Carlos a couple of seconds and a flurry of blinks of his wide eyes to process your words. Husband. This man had a husband. His typically sharpened jaw slacked in shock and his grip around your waist took your breath away, again. “No, no, no! Mi amour! Why didn’t you tell me before I did what I did?"

“Because I like it when you lay down the law and I like it even more when you show me that I’m yours… How could I resist?” You cooed, smoothing your hands down his thumping chest with a smile that was mirrored on his handsome face. Head shaking.

“Give me your phone so I can call him back, plēz.”

Carlos wasn't defeated. He sounded more relieved that he could scratch one person off his hit list, wishing it was that easy to fight off the rest of the men who crossed your path. He trusted your judgement, always, but that didn’t mean he sat back, by standing while they made their move. And you loved how protective he was, how loved you were by a man with such integrity. Even if it was a little silly from time to time. But that's what you signed up for.

You were his and he was yours – for life.

let me know what you think!

[tonycries]

Laying out the laws of the land!

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English isn't my first language so please be nice, I'm doing my best :)

I write for afab reader - fem! and gender neutral. But I try not to write self-inserts with specific features to keep them as ambiguous as possible.

Hate will either be deleted and reported or trolled with werewolf memes - and trust me, I've got a LOT of werewolf memes.

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Dub-con/ non-con/ incest/ step-cest/ illegal age-gaps and other dark things.

Scat, vomit, piss, mutilation, etc. - hardcore bodily stuff like that ykwim?

Underaged characters (even if they're technically like '03, if they're underaged in canon/ there's no canon timeskip then I feel uncomfortable writing for them.)

I also don't write for Mahito...eugh.

Other stuff is fair game!

[angel-of-the-moons]

Over The Phone

Dad Bod!Professor!Miguel x Fem!Reader

TW/CW: Just... NSFW. So much NSFW. Phone sex, masturbating, sexy selfies, sexting, all that shit.

MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

A/N: God this took forever to churn out but I finally got motivation to finish it!!

Taglist: @cupcakeinat0r @tojishugetiddies (if I forgot to tag anybody let me know, pls! I lost the saved list I had for people alshldhd)

Divider by @/across-the-art-verse

Miguel art @ meeee

The day had dragged on for what felt like far longer than usual for him; the usual students who showed up late, tried to sneak out, slept through the lecture or just ignored whatever he said.

The students who listened and actively engaged with the lesson were few and far between, and the almost silent lull between classes felt felt almost too short. Sometimes he wondered why he bothered, especially with the growing list of students who were disinterested in his class, or those that only signed up for extra credit and didn't want to do the work...

But, getting cards and thank-you post-its from students who felt like they wouldn't have been able to graduate without him kept him on in this tedium. He loved to hear from his former students about how their new careers were going--careers they credit hi to helping them achieve.

It never failed to make his heart all warm and fuzzy when he thought about them.

Miguel ran his hand across his beard, and a thought came to him about maybe shaving it off. He had grown it out; rather rugged if he had to admit it. But, he quickly shook that thought away--you loved his beard. Oftentimes he would wake up from a nap, you snuggled perfectly against his solid frame, your nails dragging through the short hairs with a content smile on your face.

Oh, he couldn't say no to you, his pretty little wife, could he?

Speaking of which... it was your day off. He couldn't help but wonder what you were--

When his phone pinged, he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and unlocks the screen to see a text from you;

Hiii baby, how's work going?

He chuckled and replied, Same as usual. Only two students slept through class this lime

*time

Your reply was swift.

Awww I'm sry :(

If it makes you feel any better, if I were in your class... wait. I wouldn't get any work done either. I'd just be lookin at you :p

He laughed, his belly shaking a little bit as he grinned at his screen, his massive fingers fumbling the small keys once again on the too-small phone screen.

Yes, you would mafe a very door student, wouldn't you, amor?

*made *poor

Miguel rolled his eyes. He was tempted to try and see if they didn't make phones built for someone with his giant hands in mind... Damn this tiny screen!

Awww my Miggy gettin all frustrated?

Yes.

For what felt like too long, his message was left on "read". He quirked a bushy brow, scratching at his beard curiously at what was keeping you.

And then, his phone pinged again.

Here, maybe this'll keep you entertained ;)

*Image attached. Click to view.*

He hummed in curiosity. Maybe it was one of those silly little doodles you liked to send to him? One of your memes, maybe? Though, it didn't make sense why the image was blurred, when--

His heart lurched up into his throat and he instantly slammed his phone against his desk, screen down; looking around pointlessly as if he were worried someone was standing over his shoulder when the image finally cleared.

Cursing himself for acting like a kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar, Miguel slowly lifted his phone to his face and looked at the picture you'd sent him.

You were nude, laying belly-down in your bed, the blankets askew around you. Your feet crossed one over the other as you smiled at the lens--you must have moved the full body mirror from the living room to your bedroom to achieve this shot--and your back was arched slightly to show off your bare ass.

He felt his cock twitch to life as he examined every pixel on the screen; wishing so badly he were home right now, to touch that soft expanse of flesh he loved so much. To cup your ass in his palms, feeling the warmth of your skin in his palms as his fingers massaged and groped the skin.

He could feel your hands slide up the soft pouch of his belly, scraping your nails delectably through the short, curly dark hairs that ran up his abdomen and covered his chest. He could feel your teeth scrape and tug his nipple before kissing your way back down...

Dios, mi amor. You're lucky I am not in the middle of a meeting! He hastily typed, pretending he wasn't practically salivating over that selfie.

Aw, didn't you like what I sent? :'(

I didn't say--

But before he could finish typing and send the text, he got another attached image from you.

He swallowed hard at the lump in his throat and his thumb hovered over the image hesitantly. He looked towards the clock above the door to his classroom. He had half an hour left...

When the image unblurred, he felt his heart damn near stop.

You were perched on the edge of the bed, your legs spread wide; one hand was holding your phone while the others spread you slick folds with nimble fingers and a cheeky expression on your face.

How bout this one?

Miguel groaned, loudly. He actually slipped a hand over his plush lips, cringing at how damn near pathetic that sounded.

He immediately clicked your contact information and hit "call".

The phone rang a painfully long, droning tone until your bubbly voice giggled on the other end of the line, "Heyyyy Miggy~"

"You are going to kill me, baby." He hissed into his phone, pressing the heel of his palm into his throbbing erection, "I'm in the middle of a school day! The students are at lunch!"

"Ohhh, did I get you all hard and excited for me?" You sigh dreamily into the phone, your voice dropping into a more sultry tone.

"Naughty boy, popping a stiffy in the middle of class."

He grunted, his head dropping back against his chair, the leather creaking under his weight as he tugged the ends of his button-up out from his rapidly-tightening jeans, "And whose fault is that?"

You gasp theatrically, "Mine? Oh, baby, I was just trying to provide you moral support, I swear!"

"Of course," Miguel huffed, eyeing the doorknob, waiting to see if he was unlucky enough that somebody were to walk in right as he pulled his cock free from his jeans, running his fingers over the swollen tip, smearing his precum around it.

He could hear in your voice, the way you were biting your lip in excitement as you spoke. "Baby, are you touching yourself?"

"You tell me, first." He replied, his voice strained as he gave himself a few tentative strokes; trying to gauge if the risk was worth it.

"Oh? Want me to tell you that I'm playing with my pussy?" You croon. "That I'm imagining you, and me, in bed..."

His teeth snagged his plush bottom lip briefly as he sped his hand up to your words, then slowed back down again. The friction wasn't right; too dry. So, he sucked on his tongue until he had a nice glob of saliva; bringing his hand up to his mouth to wet it before slicking his throbbing length up.

"Go on." He grumbled into the line.

"...ooooh." You giggled, your voice a little breathless. He could see you now, laying back on the bed, your fingers plunging in and out of you, pulling out to stroke your puffy clit; your pussy drooling into the blankets beneath you.

"Mmmm~ I'm also imagining you on top of me, my legs on your shoulders..."

He felt the oxygen squeeze from his lungs as he upped his pace, the vein in his cock throbbing and thumping in time with his rapid heart rate.

"Yeah, bebita?"

"Yeah." You huff, a small moan coming from you; "'m imagining you pinnin' me down, fucking a baby into me."

"Dios." Miguel groaned, thrusting his hips up to meet his fist. "You want a baby, hermosa? Want me to make you a mami?"

"Mhmm... want you to fill me aaaallllll the way up." You whined, your panting hot, even through the phone.

Miguel dared a glance up at the clock. Still had some time... He needed to do it quickly; needed to milk his cock so he wouldn't appear "improper" with a massive erection straining his pants.

As if enough of his female students (and even some of the male ones) didn't have enough difficulty paying attention in class...

He'd be lying if he hadn't gotten a few love confessions from students, present and former. He'd always politely turn them down, and then, if they were currently his pupils, politely and quietly have them sent to another class to avoid any improper behavior in the future.

It was as if none of them ever paid any mind to the gold band firmly secured to his ring finger--the matching mate to the one you wore on your own softer, delicate hand signifying your matrimonial bonds. Or... maybe they had and assumed they could tempt him from you.

Well, those assumptions were always wrong. The only person he could imagine bouncing on his cock, sucking it, milking it, stroking it--was you. You and only you.

Sometimes thinking of you when he was alone was the only ways he could get off, before you started dating. Even finding porn of a woman who looked like you wasn't enough. It had to be you.

And after the first time he felt your pretty pink pussy swallow his cock whole? Oh, he was addicted. Addicted and whipped, a few of his colleagues would say...

The professor and the school nurse; a bit of a cliche; but it was a nice one. The two of you had even played with a slutty nurse outfit or two.

You not always being the nurse...

"Fuck, Miggs, 'm so close." You whine loudly. He could see in his mind's eye how fast your fingers would be working your clit, maybe even giving in and plunging one of your silicone toys in and out of your tight hole for him.

In fact, he could imagine it so closely he could hear it.

"Shit, baby..." He hissed, his hand working his length furiously, now, almost in a race with you to see who would cum first. "You on speaker??"

"Mhmm~" You whine, your air leaving your body in wet-hot pants, the sound of your slick pussy being fucked--by your hand or your toy, he couldn't place--but the sound of it had his balls tightening up already.

"Gonna cum for me, mi amor?" Miguel huffed and puffed, more thick precum dribbling down from his tip. He smeared it over himself, using the fluid as lube to help hasten his impending orgasm.

"Yeah, baby~"

He snarled, the sound of stroking skin lewd and loud; your moans the best pornography his ears could ever be graced with.

"Cum for me, honey." Miguel whined, his glasses slipping further down his nose as he released his cock long enough to yank his shirt up over the soft, rounded edge of his tummy.

Immediately after, his hand returned once more around the thick pulsing shaft of him; stroking, tugging, milking himself like he knew your sweet cunt would. Your tight, wet, needy pussy that was dying for a drop of his cum.

As you wantonly moaned; he could imagine you splayed out in bed, legs wide and mouth open as you shout your orgasm out for him to hear, drowning out the outside world... and as his eyes would drift down, he could imagine your belly, cute and round; a baby kicking out at his hand as he caressed the stretched-out skin.

The image of you carrying his baby sent his mind into a blazing fire, the tightening in his balls and swelling of his cock too much to bear. Miguel arched his back, the wheels of his chair squeaking faintly across the floor as he curled his toes in his polished shoes, hot, thick ropes of cum shooting out to coat his belly, fingers, and even the underside of his desk; your name leaving his lips in a flurry of obscene prayers.

His mind was fuzzy as he slowly came down from his high, the sound of your giggle snapping him back to reality:

"See you when you get home, Miggy~"

The phone hangs up, and Miguel is left with his pearly white mess coating his belly, making his skin and hair sticky. At least he didn't get any on his shirt. This time.

The bell rang, suddenly, shaking him to full lucidity from his post-coital haze, his hairs standing on end and making him jolt up straight.

He hastily grabbed a few tissues from his desk drawer and began cleaning up, shoving a few stray stands of his graying hair back into place as he began to hear the chatter and footfall of students in the halls.

Oh, you would pay for this when you got home, all right.

[ahogedetective]

injured: your muse finds my muse injured after a vampire hunter finds them. (for maki (your choice for if she's human/vampire)! whichever one you want to be injured.)

{ vampire inspired prompts ! }

"H...Hah...ghh.... M... Maki-san...." Sitting on the ground, with his back against the wall of a dark alley: that's the state in which Maki will find her fellow vampire. A hand was clamping at his bloodied shoulder, done by the work of a vampire hunter's silver stake, with said item laying on the ground by him after he used a shadowy hand to yank it out. Thankfully, it was the only kind of damage the hunter could do, before Shuichi gravely injured him and dragged him down into the shadows with his many hands made of shadowy energy. Wherever he may have popped out to, he didn't care: he would not be able to harm him any longer, and that is all that mattered. Even moreso: would not be able to harm Maki, either....

"A... A vampire, h-he....did this to me, w-with that stake... I took care of him, s...so there is no worry of your safety being in danger. I... I'm deeply sorry to ask this of you, b-but please allow to use you as support.... I believe I should still have enough energy..t-to conceal ourselves in the shadows so none will notice us..."

[rarilight]

hello im making a meme, pls reply with ‘me’ (and an optional description of your immense tragic pain if u want to make rarity proud) if u would be DEVASTATED if i weren't to finish my colors remake so I can use your avatars for a meme

Thanks!!!!!!

[denny-artsss]

Can we pls have more hc of your interpretation of ribbuny outside the circus? 👉👈

Of course I love the human au!

-literally, the only one supporting their relationship honestly is Kinger

-Gangle's parents can't stand Jax

-Jax's mom can't stand Gangle (but she can't stand her own son either)

-Thanksgivings at Gangles parents is always awkward. Each year.

-Jax enjoys being babied but doesn't admit it

-They go on dates every weekend

-They hang out with everyone else in their free time, holding sleepovers and stuff.

-Gangle does not like Jax's mom and humors her.

-Jax and Gangle will get into fights often, as well as "physical" fights. And by "physical" I mean they wrestle on the floor like two siblings fighting over a toy.

-Jax tells everyone he's the top (no one believes him.)

-Gangle keeps bringing cats home, they currently have 4. (Jax gave like 6 other cats to zooble and Ragatha)

-Jax always brings Gangle flowers, flowers he ripped off his neighbors yard.

-Gangle smokes if she gets too stressed, but not in front of Jax. (Theres a reason for this)

-Jax is always Hype, he has ADHD.

-Jax is often cooking, so if he feels lazy he'll buy take out with Gangles credit card and throw it in the pot, pretending he cooked it. (Gangle literally gets a notification on her phone when he orders take out with her card.)

-Gangle works as a art/acting teacher at a collage. Her side job is drawing commissions.

-Jax does really badly drawn drawings of her that she sticks to the fridge.

-Cuddling is their coping mechanism

-they both have a driver license but Gangle doesn't let Jax drive cause...he's Jax.

-Jax still quotes random vines and memes from ages ago.

-Ragatha will always show up unannounced and walk in like "are you guys home?" To wich Jax will reply with "no."

-Gangle keeps making dad jokes.

-Gangle really enjoys dressing up in nice clothing, she's a lot into fashion.

-Gangle owns a pair of comedy and tragedy mask earrings that Jax bought for her birthday because of the fact she loves teaching acting and art, but he said while giving them to her "here they reminded me of your Bipolar ass."

-this whole au just feels like a giant sitcom.

(Yall I can make scenarios if you want me to, just ask in my inbox)