#ppl like that make me so uncomfortable and then she kept saying things like this person is godless as a joke like stfu???

[lottalove01]

rant <3

[piratadelamor]

literally what can you do when you have a natural face expression that people read as cold and arrogant. im not changing my style to make up for it either i've also heard comments about my boots and about me wearing black or having tattoos or having short hair or whatever. why the fuck these people are always judging me for my appearence instead of simply talking to me. i've been hearing this since i was 14 i thought something could change but more than 10 years later people are still telling me the same things that always hurt me!!!!

[andr0medafallen]

Baby, It's Halloween.

A/N: Made with the help of @foxilayde and with @alwritey-aphrodite 's marvelous taste in music in mind. I love you guys!!!!

Pairing: Jonathan Levy x Reader

Warnings: P in V, porn with plot, unprotected sex, descriptions of Jonathan carrying reader, I mean reader fucks her Professor, so., you can let me know if there is anything else, not beta read

Description: You hadn't been planning on fucking your professor. You really hadn't; sometimes those things just happen. You also hadn't been planning on him crying in your arms, but those things also sometimes happen.

Word Count: 3.1k

Additional note: if you like Jonathan Levy and also sex, read Danny's Putz and the Perv fic. If she is at all more mentally sane than me, she probably wasn't projecting onto one of the references on her resume while writing it.

Why is it that Universities never give days off for Halloween? You get Thanksgiving and  fucking Presidents' day, but not Halloween? As if that weren’t bad enough, of course it lands on a Monday this year. Your busiest, boringest day of the week; Only made up for in part by Professor Levy’s class at 12:45, to which he always shows up just disheveled enough to look class time appropriate and hot.

This strays drastically from the point, though, which is this: Halloween is on a Monday this year, Halloween is a much better holiday than Thanksgiving, and you need to maintain a professional GPA if you want to keep the fantastic lineup of Pell Grants and scholarships sitting in your Financial Aid portal. It was the accumulation of all of these fascinating tidbits of information that led to you showing up to every one of your scheduled classes in a thrift-store Indiana Jones cosplay which you and your roommates had drunkenly put together Friday night.

Despite the fact that it had been made by a gaggle of drunk college students, the costume stood strong through the test of soberness. The playfully ripped up khakis, the leather fedora that for some reason you already had lying around, the linen shirt with one too many buttons undone, and the makeuped on grime all shouted “yeah dude, it’s halloween, fucking fight me about it”, but in a fun, kind of hot way. This was an opinion you had Friday night while making the damned thing, and your confidence certainly wasn’t dimmed after sitting through your first couple of compliment filled classes.

Still, sitting through your Anthropology class–the very 12:45 lecture previously mentioned, had proven to be…not as you had expected. You had still received the “bro, you look so good”’s and “Oh my god, that’s great, I should have dressed up”’s from your friends and acquaintances in the class, but you also noticed that about every 7 minutes, Professor Levy would pause his lecture on the progression of agriculture through the anthropocene to look at you. Part of you felt like you were going crazy, because no one else seemed to notice, but what you could have written off the first time kept. fucking. happening.

At first you thought that your Professor had somehow figured out that you’d been switching tabs between your notes and the videos of your friend’s cat which she had sent you, but the glances kept happening long after you’d closed the kitten tab as discreetly and quickly as possible.

Despite your urge to uncomfortably wriggle in your seat, you were still able to pay some modicum of attention, occasionally jotting down fragmented notes of “adapted land to their needs” and “Europeans destroyed ecology and then were confused when other people didn’t cuz british ppl are stupid”. You even managed to get a head start on the homework. That is to say, you got a head start on finding out the link to the homework template was broken. Either way, though, keeping busy kept your mind from jumping to conclusions about the glances.

You breathed a sigh of relief when Professor Levy finally said, “Alright, that's all for today. We don’t have class until Wednesday, but don’t party too hard.”

The class broke into chatter, jokes about “Grandpa Levy” telling you all “not to party too hard” and idle conversation about various forms of debauchery going on that night tossed around.

You turned as Marissa, the girl who sat next to you poked you and asked, “Are you going to the library today?”

You hummed, distracted. “Maybe. Don’t wait up. And don’t study too hard.” You winked with a grin as she rolled her eyes at you playfully and left the classrooms dusty walls and creaky seats, before walking up to Professor Levy’s desk. You waited patiently for the go-getters and teachers' pets to ask their questions and take their leave before gently clearing your throat behind him.

Professor Levy spun, eyes wide when he saw you there. You had never noticed the dark circles beneath them, how they so perfectly seemed to frame his face in a way that you didn’t know was possible.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you. The link for the homework is broken.” You trailed your finger along his desk, a fidgeting motion masked through the confidence of the archeologist you were imitating. It was coated in an endearing layer of dust that you had found was a common fixture of the anthropology wing, and it held Professor Levy’s school-issued laptop and an Oliver Sacks book–The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat.

Professor Levy’s brow furrowed, eye line slipping to where your finger met his table before snapping back to meet your own gaze. Apparently he believed you to be much less observant than you are, or maybe he simply can’t help himself, because his eyes roamed away from your face once more, this time to the top button of your linen shirt, the lapse of fabric where the valley of your breasts met.

Gaze snapping up again, Levy informed you, “There is no homework for Wednesday. The module likely transferred over from last semester, but I’ll make sure to fix that. Have a happy Halloween.”

You didn’t know how he did it. The man was so easily flustered, yet he spoke to you like nothing at all had transpired. It almost made you want to laugh, how this man was so clearly looking at your breasts just seconds before, and decided to just play it off as if you wouldn’t have noticed. All it took to get him blushing during lectures was teasing him for the music he played before class, but now here he was, calmly explaining that the homework assignment was canceled so you could get debauched, after so obviously staring at your breasts, and nothing?

“...okay,” you conceded, wiping the dust from your hand onto your pants before looping your thumbs in your belt loops. “Thanks.”

He resumed packing his things into his canvas bag, likely assuming that you would leave. You thought about doing just that, but– “Professor?”

Levy’s head tilted back towards you in surprise. You weren’t sure by his expression whether you’d exceeded his expectations or overwhelmed them. Either way, you continued the originally poorly planned message with, “Indiana Jones fan?”

Professor Levy’s eyes seemed to bug out from your discreet tease before he regained his own composure.

“I can’t say that the trilogy is the most accurate representation of Archeology as a study, but yeah, it’s a… pretty good film.”

You snickered, turning on a booted heel. “Happy Halloween, Professor Levy,” you called as you walked out of the lecture hall through the wooden door. There was something charming about how Professor Levy seemed to think that you hadn’t noticed the noticeably hard wood that was currently pushing against the confines of his pants.

***

You knocked on his door that night at 8 pm. Well, not his door, you weren’t some creepy stalker, but his office door. It’s not like you had been looking for him or anything, but you always cut through the anthro building to get back to your apartment when it was cold, and it was always less crowded if you went through the office area instead of the lecture hallways, and it wasn’t like you had meant to notice that his light was still on and didn’t show any signs of turning off.

So yeah, you reformed all of your Halloween plans on the way to the house party that you were actually supposed to be going to because your professor who clearly had the hots for you had to be pathetically sad to be grading papers at 8 pm on Halloween, even if it was a Monday.

When he opened the door he fit the exact image which had formulated in your mind; button-up opened a few buttons revealing a white undershirt (granted, in your head the undershirt was replaced with a glimpse of bare chest), hair messed up in a cute, disgruntled way, and papers covering his desk, not an inch of empty space.

“Trick or treat,” you playfully quipped, smirking at him from where you leaned in the doorway. After you had finished all of your classes for the day, you had opened your shirt a couple of extra buttons, exposing your black lacy bra underneath; This was something that Professor Levy clearly noticed, his eyes lingering on your chest (again) as he looked you up and down. He seemed less ashamed of it this time around. Maybe it was because he was tired, or the two of you weren’t in the middle of a lecture hall. Maybe he had finally noticed how you wanted him back.

“You don’t seem to care very much about professionalism in school environments,” Professor Levy noticed.

You shrugged. “Dress codes are for High Schools and Mormons. C’mon, stop moping, it’s Halloween–”

Before you had the chance to finish your offer, Levy cut you off with, “Who says I’m moping?”

You scoffed. “Either you’re sad or you’re boring. Anyways, as I was saying, I have blood,” you joked, pulling out a bottle of cheap wine from your satchel, “and candy, and by all means, you can stay here and be boring, or you can hang out with me so that I don’t have to be near drunk frat boys. By all means, your choice, Professor Levy, but I do hope you’ll take pity on me.”

He seemed to be weighing his options, staring at you as he decided. You smiled back at him, with only a hint of snark. “It’s a bad idea,” he said, but he seemed resigned; You knew that it wouldn’t take much more pushing to get him to cave.

“Perfect. Your place or mine? Mine is probably filled with drunk college students dressed like slutty vampires, but I’m flexible,” you joked.

Professor Levy sighed, brow furrowed. “Come on, I’m parked in Lot F.” He picked up his bag, tossing in the random knick knacks which he decided he needed, but leaving the papers. You tried to stay calm, but internally you were smiling, giggling, and punching the air. You had managed to get your hot professor to take you home on Halloween. How the fuck did you manage to get your hot professor to take you home on Halloween?

You followed him to his car, a grey prius, doing your best to keep up that suave facade that you had spent at least two years perfecting. It was a quiet walk. You weren’t sure if you should be filling the silence; It wasn’t even a particularly comfortable silence, both of you so stuck in your own thoughts. Once in the car, though, Levy turned the radio on to a soul station, which made you smile.

“Otis Redding? Not Spooky Scary Skeletons?” You teased, looking over the center console at your Professor.

“I don’t think it was me who wrote my Midterm paper on the influence of soul on the Modern Era.”

“Oh God, I think if I start thinking about school right now I’ll have a stress migraine.”

Levy chuckled. “It was the best paper I read.”

You rolled your eyes. “Yeah? is that why you looked so depressed when you opened the door, Professor Levy?”

Instead of answering, he pulled into the driveway of a beautiful culdesac suburban home that made you wonder if you really knew anything about him at all. He got out of the car, and for a moment you were worried that you had offended him, but he circled around the front of the car, opening the door for you.

He leaned in close–close enough for you to smell his cologne, the spice and leather mixing with his natural scent–and told you, “If you’re a guest in my house and I’m going to be drinking your five dollar wine, you should really call me Jonathan, Dr. Jones.”

You grinned, taking his offered hand as he led you through his door and into the house. You set your bag on the mahogany table and wandered into the kitchen.

“Wine glasses?” You asked.

“Lost all the wine glasses in the divorce,” Jonathan joked. You glanced at him, eyebrows scrunched.

“What cruel and unusual punishment,” you quipped, turning back to the cabinet above you. You never realized how little you knew about the man. He wasn’t the type to mention anything about his personal life during his lectures, and you’d never asked. You guessed that there was a lot that he didn’t know about you, too. “Luckily for you, I prefer my five dollar wine in mugs. Do you want…” You looked at the mugs you had grabbed. “Snoopy or Hello Kitty? Quite refined taste, Jonathan.”

“Definitely Hello Kitty.” Jonathan walked further into the room, leaning on the island next to where you poured the wine. “My daughter, she’s in charge of most of the mug selection around here.”

“She at her mom’s?” You asked, handing Jonathan the glass.

“You know, you’re not as subtle as you think,” Jonathan responded, tilting his glass towards you before taking a sip.

“I’m not trying to be subtle,” you remarked, sipping your own alcohol.

“What is it you’re playing at, then?” He seemed different in his own house; More confident. No longer quietly trudging about the day, but questioning your own crumbling authority.

“I’m not playing at anything, Professor Levy. Just playing.”

You paused when you felt his hand close around your wrist. It was big and warm, sending sparks of a thrilling heat down your back. “I thought I told you to call me Jonathan.”

“Just playing then, Jonathan,” you breathed. He’d been leaning closer and you hadn’t even noticed. Not until now, when your faces were mere inches apart.

“This is highly unprofessional.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself, and failing.

“Live a little, Levy.” When he finally kissed you (your endgame the entire night, which would have seemed ridiculous and unachievable just last week) it was hard, and just rough enough, hands running along your ribcage as he pinned you against the kitchen island with his hips. When you broke away for air, he didn’t stop, mouth trailing down to your neck to suck bruises and nip at the skin there while his hands worked on opening what few buttons had still been left done on your blouse.

You started fumbling with the buttons of Jonathan’s dark red button up, gasping as he suckled into your skin. You managed to get it off, tossing it took the floor, and groaned when you saw the little patch of hair, leading down below Jonathan’s waistline.

He dragged your trousers along your thighs and onto the floor, fingers hooking your panties along with, before lifting you by your waist onto the counter. The cool stone of Jonathan’s countertop sent shivers down your spine, but that was soon countered by a lustful heat when his thick fingers found their way between your folds. They were teasing, playing you like a meandering harmony as you buried your face into Jonathan’s shoulder, his soft curls brushing your cheek and his scent overpowering your senses. Your pussy clenched around his index finger when he inserted it in, and you were half tempted to beg him for more.

Instead, you lifted your head from Jonathan’s shoulder, looking at him with lidded eyes as his finger pumped inside you. He chose this moment to add a second, just so that he could see the look on your face as he did it, breath catching and eyes rolling back.

When you managed to regain composure, you asked, “We gonna fuck on this counter, or…”

“No,” Jonathan removed his fingers from inside you so he could grab you by the hips and lift you up, leveraging your body against his with your legs wrapped around his back, “We’re gonna fuck on the couch.”

You giggled a little, licking and biting at his exposed neck as he walked the two of you to his living room couch, careful not to lose balance or drop you. He laid you down beneath him, eyes appreciating your form as his hands gently unclipped your lace bra, dragging it off so he could feel your soft skin. You leaned up as he worked at your breasts, hands working at his belt, followed by his button, followed by zipper. You smiled when your hand finally met Jonathan’s dick and he gasped, burying his face into your shoulder.

Both of you worked in silence, entangled and connected by lips and hands and warmth. You were kissing, tongue in Jonathan’s mouth as he lined himself up with your entrance. You could feel warmth building inside you, as his head brushed the sensitive bundle of nerves inside you and his calloused fingers worked at your clit. There was the familiar feeling pulling at you, tugging at your core, of lust and release, but there was something else–something less familiar–there as well. Something tense but emotional. Unexpected and painful and beautiful and incohesive in every sense of the word. You didn’t have much time to dwell on it though, breath mixing with Jonathan’s with your bodies connected in every sense of the word.

You could feel that spring that’s coiled within you snap as Jonathan’s thrusts reach a messy and passionate peak. The noise Jonathan made as he met his own release was almost a growl, and you were half tempted to laugh as you came down from your high. You didn’t, though.

The air was tense with something you didn’t quite understand until you saw Jonathan’s face. His eyes were just slightly red when he pulled out of you, your own reflection clear on the glassy surface, betraying emotions that you knew all too well; loneliness, confusion, shame. He seemed awkward and unsure, but you pulled him down on the couch, cramped for space and practically laying on top of you.

You carded your hands through his hair in what you hoped was a soothing gesture. “Hey, It’s okay, Jonathan. It’s gonna be okay.” 

You didn’t know his problems—you weren’t even sure you wanted to know—but the two of you laid there, bodies connected, and it didn’t really matter. Everyone has problems. You have problems, Jonathan clearly has problems, and those problems definitely aren’t your problems to fix. But it was nice, laying on his sofa, and touching his soft curls, and knowing that for this moment in time, these few hours, neither of you need to feel so lonely. 

Yeah, it’ll be okay.

I would literally rather have 0 notes than 5,000 likes and no reblogs.

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

this girl one time wanted to have sex with me and when i asked to use a condom she laughed it off and said it wasnt cool, and began to chip away at my boundary until i gave her what she wanted. she kept trying to get me to do things and i would say no, and she would continue asking anyway. in bed she said something like “you said you would” and that legitimately scared me, because it seemed like she was just blatantly lying to my face, or just forgot. then she called herself a succubus (A DEMON) and my gut screamed at me to be careful around her. sorry this may be TMI, but im anon so whatever, she said i could nut in her, which is the complete opposite of my original boundary. she was so sweet otherwise and communicated really good. except for when i texted her my concerns about being manipulated. she just became really defensive. im really happy im not “under her spell” anymore. i dont know what she was trying to do, but she could have hurt me really bad

its not tmi, its ok, you know me :p <3.. im sorry your boundaries were disrespected :( ill put my answer under read more cus its probly gona be long , this message had me contemplating some things..

IMO : sex is so tricky its been a struggle my whole life to understand how i feel about it & where my boundaries lie + allowing myself to express them so i understand the struggle u present here altho it's a different perspective.. some people use sex as a vehicle to gain power over others, by way of luring their partner into a state of vulnerability, i dont think that's something demonic necessarily i think it's usually more surface level than that. however

you do see a huge rise in the amount of ppl kind of, trying to personify the succubus nowadays? ppl have always wanted to be sexy but it's like different than the way ppl wanted to be sexy when i was younger. it got rly mainstream to have kind of a demon aesthetic if that makes sense? when i was younger this stuff was reserved for the relentlessly bullied & punished Goth and Emo kids.

but ok when i worked at spencers gifts in 2021/22 they had all these shirts of anime succubus girls getting choked and in bondage n shit, and these shirts were their best sellers they were outselling most the band tees and franchises like naruto.. and im telling youuu it was like, the youngest girls always buying these shirts, it made me so uncomfortable!! sometimes i would walk away and get my coworker to ring them up cus i was like nah im not selling a child that shit...but it really made me think like wow if i was in 7th grade and wore this shit to school it wou;dve been like wearing a giant KICK MY ASS!!!! target on my back but it's like, a popular thing rn.

and im not saying the bullying should return ofc, not the point. but it lead me down the string of thought wondering why this stuff is being pushed into the mainstream so heavily. sex sells i guess $$$ but yeah i think right now it's especially common to refer to yourself as a succubus if you're trying to feel a sense of power as a woman. because as a woman there are very few ways to gain power other than using sex. and many people want power! but i dont think most of them are demonic. just lost..

still its good u followed ur instinct to stay away from that girl because it is really cruel to manipulate someone in a moment where they've trusted you enough to be close to them like that.

yeah i think its rly rare for someone to be in some true demonic possession shit but i feel there can be dark things that linger *around* people who have weak spiritual armor and sort of, feast off their energy & create misfortunes around the person that generate bad energy for it to feed off of. but i dont think they have too much control over your actions like i would imagine for someone who's truly possessed. i feel a lot of ppl have these sort of ambient malignant attachments especially if they keep a lot of dark imagery & symbols around thinking it's just an aesthetic.

thas just my thoughts....really bored tonite so im typing a lot.... i love sex i think it can be so beautiful and restoring, it helps me feel so much happier in life to have good sex regularly i dont think sex or sexiness is evil. i just think its easy for ppl w bad intentions to turn it into this whole twisted ass mind game when it shld rly b so simple and natural and a loving connection that sets u free......be safe out there anon be discerning! protect you heart..<3

[videostak]

cool i had to pick up my sister again last second to where i got there after she had already gotten out cause my mom was drunk again. Tho i was just like la la la cause i rly dont care abt her and cant trust her at all but i was just like oh cool this again lol. What rly annoyed me tho was ive been watching the old oscars in order and my mom just sat down to watch them and kept asking questions at every thing that would show up onscreen clearly more drunk than when i had left and then when the pianist was nominated started saying "maaan thats like the perfect movie to make if u raped a little girl" and want ppl to like u again and me n my sister were like ummm ok kinda a weird thing to say but sure u like his movie ok whatever and she just kept going talking abt how hes a rapist and how she loves that movie like dude. Just talk abt one or the other but it got so unbearable i just had to say i was gonna take a nap but then my mom was like oh ill go and i was like no im gonna nap but then we she offered again i was like ya ok you can go lol then we continued watching lol. Its insane how unfazed she is despite knowing every1 wants her to stop and that its a problem. Like the moment she stops getting lectured abt ut she goes back to making every1 uncomfortable. Idgaf truly i just dont want her to get into an accident while driving my sister or little sister to work cause she like just does not care abt driving when drunk . So like im hoping my sister can start driving herself soon. Tho ill seeeee cause its a p hard thing to jump into especially w/ like the stress that u have to do it cause of circumstances so i dont rly wanna try to push her bur it like suuucks in a sense. Not rly bummed abt it cause im optimistic abt my future and independence im just worried for my siblings n stuuuuff ._.

[meaganfoster]

tv series the wilds!!!!!!

THE WILDS. tysm <3 going 2 answer primarily pertaining to the girls and s1 btw

Favorite character: FATIN. huge huge divergence for me she is not the kind of character i usually fall in love with at all especially when toni is right there and perpetually seething w rage. but toni and leah tie for second place bc fatin is a walking contradiction with a superiority complex and uncomfortably complicated relationship with her dad and unfortunately it does mean i can never stop thinking about her. shes also the highlight of s2 for me. incredible for me to latch on to a normalgirl but the second fatin is in the presence of someone she actually loves the dynamic is insaneee and i live for it. also her character arc is so fine tuned and well-done it IS a bait-and-switch there are so many layers to peel back when it comes to fatin. love is real

Funniest character: dot. she Gets it

Best-looking character: sorry i know i said i wasn't bringing up the boys but the last time i watched it it was raf. gretchen obviously. also the actor who plays martha.....hand in marriage pls

3 favorite ships: i don't necessarily ship all of these (only the first) im just an enjoyer and an Understander foremost. anyway leah/fatin obviously first place who is doing it like them. girls who make each other worse who have to swallow teeth to love each other who are island4sea. if you even care. anyway second place dot/fatin third place raf/seth. when you're stranded on an island and you've always had to take comfort in solitude but you hate yourself and the one person you felt a kinship with is gone and there is an attractive boy who acts like you bring out a different side of him than the others do. and he also totally has a girlfriend. im just saying what happens isn't nothing and also coincidentally s2 is a story of seduction. to some extent. i'm not going to get into all my thoughts on leah and raf as audience proxies and the implications and the subversions but. BOY do i have so many.

Least favorite character: JEFF. i would like to kill him with hammers please <3 i love all the girls so if we're only sticking to s1 to a much lesser extent i dislike gretchen's annoying assistant. idk why they kept panning to him i could not care less about what he had to say lol. 90% of the boys mean an equal amount of nothing to me but out of them. kirin. sorry.

Least favorite ship: toni/shelby.blasphemy i know and it is primarily bc of how ppl act like they're the pinnacle of teen love or w/e but look sometimes you have a thing with a girl on an island and then you're flown out. sorry. i like their relationship for what it was and the trajectory we did get to see like i understand it. but i don't care lol

Reason why I watch it: good show. GREAT tv. leah rilke

Why I started watching it: i can't remember unfortunately. probably saw it on my dash one (1) time during the era of watching nothing but shows about teen girls lol i am SO glad i did.

[toxicshipsincorporated]

oh man, how about 1, 9, and 19 for that ask meme. gimme the salt

Imma do TUA because I think that's my most recent & prominent fandom and that's where we met ahaha.

What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?*

mmm...definitely Dolores/Five. And I'll say this, to each their own. Ship and let ship from the womb to the tomb ya feel? But...I just don't get it as like a ship to be invested in, in terms of it being two characters. At the end of the day, Dolores is just a delusion brought about by immense stress and trauma and so it's always just....Five. You can have him talk to her, have her talk back to him, you could even have him have sex with her but...it will always just be....Five (imo). And that may work for some ppl. I can see it really really working for big Five stans but for me, ships are about dynamics. I've never been all that interested in just one character but rather what happens when you add a+b. So I just don't get that particular ship.

Most disliked character(s)? Why?

I didn't like Lila. But to be fair, I didn't like any character introduced after season 1....or even characters that were intro'd in s1 and continued to s2. And that's because I feel like s2 was an effort in....completely flattening all the characters. All the hard edges and interesting bits (the nasty, dark, and unlikable parts) of characters got shaved away and it was treated like.....development? Nevermind that I think it sucks that for characters to be "good" characters (from a technical standpoint) or to develop they have be....less complicated or less angry, less mean or broken. It's was like a big PR campaign where the writers were like "nvm!!! childhood trauma can't make you into deeply flawed and difficult and broken adult!! it actually just makes you goofy and quirky!! haha, have a fart joke."

And after that rant, gonna bring it back around, Lila was...like emblematic of what the showrunner/writers THOUGHT they should have done for the Hargreeves in s1. She just makes no sense to me as a character. Her actions, her decisions, etc. for me lack any strong grounding in....human emotion. There's no strong motivation that acts as a throughline for her narrative. She is inconsistent. She seems to only act and react as the the narrative needs her to. She is the illusion of depth.

For me, I think the first season was...imperfect but interesting. And the season that stayed true to the emotional core of the original comics. In the comics, the trauma, pain and abuse that characters experienced never made them BETTER, never made them badass or cool or edgy. It made them brittle. It made them mean and bitter and nasty. It kept them from establishing and maintaining strong relationships. It kept them from being able to love people in ways that didn't push that loved one away. BUT!!! Despite all that, despite the Hagreeves' trauma ultimately making them into deeply flawed and at times impossible to like or root for...it treated their story as still worth telling. Yes trauma and pain is ugly. Yes, it is uncomfortable and difficult and it does not feel triumphant or good. BUT IT IS STILL WORTH EXISTING. And I just felt like...that was a narrative that was so so important to me. It isn't just the good survivors, the pretty ones, the nice and sweet ones that deserve to have their story told. Even the people who LOST to their pain deserve their moment in the sun.

But...the showrunners and writers (and much of the viewers it seems) of s2 did not feel the same way. It was....discouraging and Lila...is really emblematic of all that for me.

I also don't care that much for Luther, especially in seasons 2 and on. At least in S1, he...made sense. Did I like his decisions? No but at least I understood him to be someone who was capable of...thought? After s1, I think the writers thought the only way to make him likeable was to make him as dumb as rocks.

What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

I guess...the thing I hated most was how mean so many people were. And I won't lie and say I was always an angel, I definitely had my moments (or fifty...) but...I think that was also the environment that was cultivated in the TUA fandom. From the drop, people seemed so intent on harm, anger, and viciousness. And maybe that has to do with how...visceral some parts of the first season was and how a lot of younger people who maybe shouldn't have been watching got into it. There was so much lashing out and attacking, people called each other horrible things, made horrific accusations. And it all came down to (imo) wanting to hurt someone else, wanting to inflict pain on others. For what reason??? I'm sure there are many.

Also ppl were so weird about sex a lot of the times? And kinks and dark fan stuff? Like...the original shit was dark as hell and even tho the show was quite a few shades lighter, the amount of....hypocrisy I saw in that fandom was.....stomach turning.

[scoups4lyfe]

Hebi Anon

We've already seen the backfire effect in full force

Taro's "That's not right" backstory. As much as he means well, his blunt approach just puts everybody on edge (because again, stupid human brain thinks it's being attacked). Due to the fight or flight response, the people tried fight first (the mob), then when that didn't work, flight (just leaving to be in peace).

And as we all know, Taro hasn't grown past acting like that so we're going to see it again and again. Infact, we see it whenever Taro turns someone into a Hitotsu-Ki, biggest example being his boss and her obsession with her youth. He just would not stop shoving the unpleasant truth into her face so she kept digging her heels in harder and harder until she turned (if he had just started with "[actual age] but you have so much energy for your age" the confict wouldn'thave happened). Only thing is, Taro is in the unique position where he can literally beat it out of people, so there's no reason for him to understand that that's a terrible way to get people to change

As for the mob, I highly doubt that the mob just arose suddenly. SOMEBODY must have tried to get Taro to understand that he's just antagonizing everybody by doing that. If not Jin (and if he didn't then that's just bad parenting and another reason why I don't like him either) then at least some other adults in the neighborhood. I genuinely believe that Taro just looked at them funny and blew them off, continuing to go "that's not right" to everything, as if the conversation trying to get him to understand didn't happen, until everybody got fed up.

(I also see examples of Taro also performing the backfire effect with his own beliefs but I'll save that for later. More reasons why I don't like him)

Mhmmmmmmmmm

I did some research about this so I’ll have more to keep in mind going forward,,, but I’m excited for your thoughts as always comrade >:))

I don’t yet have enough concrete evidence or knowledge of the characters to form much of an opinion rn but I’ll get back to you on this :33

Although as of rn I’m inclined to Tarou’s defense. My guy has like -8 social intelligence.

I could very easily see an adult saying “hey maybe blah blah blah instead or don’t blah blah blah” and Tarou going

“Why?”

And then the adult being like: *splutters* because—- (doesn’t at all explain why)

Tarou has a big big bIIIIIIGGGGG gap socially,, and to get him to understand you have to really go to his level,, model it in a way he can understand. (Or else he won’t, and therefore not learn.)

This is also assuming someone did try and correct him. The thing is, people generally do not like confrontation. Thinking about the Backfire Effect, I think Sonoza showcases perfectly what that is.

Society has social rules we abide by.

But Sonoza doesn’t kno, nor understand them. So he breaks all these rules, and just goes up to people and laughs maniacally in an attempt to learn from the humans. Except the humans (the nurses) scream/reject or alienate his behavior. This is because of the backfire effect.

(And it even effects the audience <33)

If someone went up to you and acted like Sonoza, it would be wildly uncomfortable. Hence why I describe it as “insane behavior.” Because that is what it feels like to me.

But to him, it’s not. (As he doesn’t know these rules) —-hence why most ppl don’t know how to accurately respond to this behavior.

Humans are cowards

I truly 100% could imagine none of them confronting Tarou, and instead gossiping to each other before finally doing the mob protest. And I actually think that would be the more realistic outcome.

Esp for a country like Japan. (Confrontation culture wise)

Parenting wise

we saw Tarou make his dad Onigiri (giving it to him as Jin went to work), and?

Idk. If Jin is a single dad and he has a job, then whose to say exactly how much he was able to teach Tarou :00

[fkinavocado]

hi i have a post pinned about about dwd explaining a bit about why people have an issue with olivia talking about it being ‘female pleaure’ when its not. and yeh in the screenplay the simulation is in the 1950s and outside of it is the year 2050 but idk about in the actual movie

(spoilers under the cut and in @angelrryslut 's pinned post too)

hi hun! so, based on your last sentence you haven't seen the movie. i read your post, and while i agree with most of it, i do think that there maybe some things that to me at least haven't been clarified from what i've read from others- what i mean by that is, i've also seen people review the movie based on screenings and they say that jack and alice are actually dating/married (i honestly forgot, but the idea is that they're together) and that alice is actually a surgeon in real life? and he, i guess feels emasculated and wants to be the one to provide etc. from what i understood (and i might be wrong, again, this is based on what i've put together reading from other ppl's experience seeing the movie at screenings) i'm guessing she did agree to the whole simulation thing to some degree but wasn't fully aware of what was going to happen exactly. which yes, is absolutely abusive, but there's a matter of nuance- he didn't kidnap her off the street and tied her to the bed. doesn't really make it less problematic in the grand scheme of things- but i feel like it's important nonetheless.

the bruises on her arms are from the IVs and how the wives are being fed/ kept "healthy" while never removing them from the simulation. the men actually come out of it when they "go to work"

the gist of it is- to me- that the wives have been brainwashed in this simulation and have no recollection of their actual lives out in the real world but alice kinda gains consciousness slowly and tries to figure out what's what. all the men are in on it. it's incredibly abusive but i would say more than physically, it's mental and emotional abuse and it's absolutely shocking- BUT THIS IS NOT WHAT'S WRONG ABOUT THE MOVIE. in fact, there is nothing wrong with the movie. it's a movie! (what i like about the movie is that it feels like a movie edhbfsdkhfs) it's a thriller! it's supposed to shock you, supposed to make your skin crawl, supposed to depict uncomfortable themes. it's FICTION. cuz i've seen ppl trash the movie for the plot and i'm like???? fdnfdsfs wow.

what IS wrong about all this is the promo! what i have a problem with is when the director advertises this movie as female pleasure oriented and then you find out that actually the main character is victim of abuse and that really rubs me the wrong way. granted she couldn't forewarn the audiences about this and give away the plot- but she just shouldn't have put so much emphasis on how this is a feminist movie/ focused on female pleasure etcetc when there is such a heavy discrepancy between what ppl would be expecting to see going in and what is actually happening between the main characters. yes, good for alice for trying to get away etc and yes i see how this is against patriarchal stuff etc i get it, i really do. but the promo rubs me the wrong way, there's smth very wrong about the sex scenes being used to lure ppl in when you're not aware that the female in question is being in fact abused that whole time

[jackiebrackettt]

*Leans mic uncomfortably close to your face*: Thoughts on Thanatos from hit podcast JRWI: Apotheosis?

*blue screen effect* no noo I’ll write something for you it will be long and rambley so under a cut we go! apotheosis spoilers up to ep 12 underneath ^_^

umm but actuallyyyyy I think he’s such an interesting character and I loooove robot/android/ai/ etc characters so much for their range (<- largely invisible to a lot of ppl ig but not me there’s like an electromagnetic field I’m tapped into) Thanatos specially being a guy beforehand and he’s like.. 50 idk he’s mad at the gods he’s putting himself Into a machine to kill them (thransgender moment 💪) and he still feels whatever propelled him to do that so much. he feels it so much that he kills his dad and commits wholly to his goal.

and I think it’s so interesting listening back on ep 1 bc he didn’t like.. go there to kill his dad necessarily. his dad brought out the fucking sword immediately and kept saying he couldn’t give thanatos answers when he was asking for them. just saying that bc thanatos Remembers he’s chosen his path and has to kill him. whether Thanatos regrets what he did or not I think he needs to believe that he’s Right in a similar way rumi does. but it’s interesting that he doesn’t Know. like in that fight bizly flavoured Thanatos missing so much as him hesitating. I think in his mind that’s the point of no return. he does this and then he’s Fully committed himself to the goal even if he doesn’t know why he had to do that. why he couldn’t just leave

anyway I think that + his scene with his sister even though he was intent was to kill the goddess regardless of the harm caused to her (although he did express that it would be nice if she could be saved) + his quick friendship with Peter is SO interesting and complex. I think he .. idk Thinks he’s just a robot with no feelings and just a goal but like he jokes around and teases rumi and him and peter trade rocks and the absolute emotion in his voice when he killed Peter is sooo….. You Can’t Fool Me I Know You Feel Things!!!!! I’m so curious to see where this will go. Thanatos has had umm some kind of development I guess (although he’d still kill innocent ppl if he felt it was necessary) but this surely would have to shake him up so much and i’m wondering if his guilt over killing peter would cause him to double down on his goals or to briefly abandon them in hopes of getting peter back

LARGELY incoherent he truly does make my head blue screen but here u go ^_^

[commaclear]

I made an anon a while back about Wilbur keeping a photo of him and quackity when they were younger and I had an idea for this dream au ppl r writing about

after quackity broke his heart, wilbur started to get a little more distant from everyone. one night, hoping to go home early to see charlie, niki catches him and asks if he would like to join everyone for a movie night at her place. Wilbur felt something tell him not to go, but... he missed everyone maybe he should. he accepted nikis invitation (even though she probably wouldn't have taken no for an answer)

he missed this, having laughs with his friends. he got to catch up with fundy and hear how college is going. its when niki asked if someone could pick up the pizza. wilbur offered, calling fundy to join him and heading out to go grab the pizzas. niki handed him the cash for them and they headed off.

"you stay in the car, heres the key. shouldn't take too long right?" fundy nodded --

wilbur entered the pizza shop, making uncomfortable eye contact with a group of guys standing outside before "uhh pickup for nihachu?" Wilbur handed the cash across the table

"hmm, should be out in a couple minutes! were working on closing do you mind waiting outside and we will inform you when ready?" wilbur paused, "I um- yeah sure " he chuckled nervously.

he stepped outside the place. glancing over at the group of guys on the other side of the shop, quickly turning his head down after exchanging eyes with one of the more buff guys in the group.

"you want something?" a raspy voice called to him, wilbur looked up to see the guy along with his friends a little closer towards him. "n-no I'm fine thank you." wilbur gave a nervous smile and stumbled back before hitting the wall. "by that judgy look I'm thinking otherwise." the guy motioned for one of his friends to walk up a bit faster to wilbur. "he-hey man look- I don't want any trouble I promise!" wilbur keeps looking at the door, praying to anything that hasn't set their sights on ruining his life to listen. the guy in front of wilbur crushed his cigarette on the pavement as he looked over to the door, "no I'm not so sure about that, don't look at the door were just talking" wilbur felt his breath getting heavy, "please i- I don't have anything on me! my friend- he's waiting in the car just let me go I wont-" wilbur was cut off by a punch straight to his stomach before he knew it his arms were held up and his face was being bashed one punch after the other.

"PLEASE! JUST LET ME GO PLEASE!" Wilbur begged "I WANNA GO HOME" "alright" the man smirked as his two friends dropped wilbur onto the pavement before the lot of them stomped onto wilbur. as wilbur curled up to shield himself, he heard a small flap of a paper fall out his pocket.

a small picture of him holding quackity from behind, the two smiling and cheeks red. wilburs eyes widened, reaching out for the paper before a foot stomped on his hand harshly. wilbur cried out in pain. it didn't stop, everytime he thought it was over, a foot scraped over his head. "WILBUR!" Wilbur looked up to fundy running with a phone in hand. "IM CALING THE FUCKING POLICE LEAVE HIM ALONE RIGHT NOW!" Fundy screeched

the group soon ran from the scene, fundy hung up the phone and immediately checked wilbur. "wil-" wilbur fliched at the touch, standing up slowly and heading inside the shop. "is the order for nihachu ready now?" the cashier nodded quickly and ran over to his co worker for the 4 boxes. "thank you." wilbur responded to the boxes being given. the car ride was silent. much to wilburs dismay, fundy insisted he drove. fundy kept glancing over at wilbur, who was looking quietly out the window. "stop at my house." wilbur said softly, "please" "wil-" "I just want to go home. please." -- wilbur got out of the car, saying a quick goodbye and grabbing his things.

"wil... just grab a box before you go, that's all I ask." fundy pleaded wilbur complied, just wanting to go home with no more problems. as he opened his door, he set his stuff onto the counter, and placed his slightly ripped and scuffed picture onto the counter. he sighed and passed out onto his couch. -- "hey darling," "wil you're ba-" Quackity gasped and quickly ran to his husband, cupping his face. "WILBUR WHAT-" Wilbur closed his eyes, putting his hands over quackitys softly. "shh,, I know, Im fine i just- i just want you right now." quackitys eyes softened, wilbur felt kisses over his black eye and opened his eyes to quackity smiling and grabbing charlie from his crib "cmon,' he led wilbur towards their bedroom, " he's missed you" wilbur almost cried in relief, he's missed them too. quackity and wilbur sat on their respective parts of the bed, watching charlie sit up and babble on to wilbur all about his day. wilbur smiled as he gently moved charlies hand from his black eye, "no don't touch that baby" he cooed, charlie giggled in response. wilbur ruffled his hair and kissed his sons forehead. he's home.

maybeeeeee ill write a part two if I haven't absolutely destroyed yalls patience by reading all this lol

*waggles finger at you* If you keep this nonsense up, you're gonna regret it! Don't ask how or when, but just retribution will find you, and god spare any poor soul who gets caught in the crossfire

anyway, here have a slightly crushed party hat for dinosaur themed party

[mycptsdrecovery]

hi im not sure if what ive been thru counts as CSA but i do fit the symptoms, i guess im just trying to figure out if i was just emotionally abused or if some things count as CSA ? idk sorry if this isnt wanted so anyway tw:

had family friends who were the same age as me growing up who would constantly make sexual comments and oftentimes trick me into seeing them naked or randomly pulling their dick out to pee when we were playing outside. one of these kids in particular would respond to my humiliation and disgust by telling me that im gonna need to be intimate with my husband one day so i should get used to it. at the time all i felt was shame and fear being alone with them, and when i told my mom i got the classic "boys will be boys". whenever i am around them now they still make weird uncomfortable comments that are just "getting a rise out of me" and its just really weird. they also would jab me in the ribs all the time.

i was forced to hug people a lot as a kid no matter how much i resisted i was just guilted into it. idk if i hate hugs cuz in autistic or because of this or what but i feel like ppl respond better to hugs if it isnt compulsory? idk

my mom made weird comments about my body when i started going thru puberty like calling the fat that started showing on my chest "little nibblets" like at a public pool then laughed when i was humiliated

i had an older friend when i was like 5 who was probably like 10 and eveyr time we played togethr we would go play with barbies and she would eventually start making it sexual like showing me different positions with the barbies, i remember becoming really fixated on dolls having kinky sex and reading really intense sexual fanfictions that felt almost like compulsions like i would feel like im doing some really bad immoral thing by reading it but cant stop. she was my only friend but she would exclude me for fun and she was kinda a bully tbh

i have a weird memory from a family vacation when my dad was taking pictures of my sister and i on the beach and he kept saying to my mom how much we looked like models and i swear to god he called us hot. like is that weird??? thats fucking weird right??? its the only memory that i have like that tho so idk i kinda think it didnt happen tbh but it made me really uncomfortable

my first sexual encounters ended up being kinda noncon because of communication difficulties between my partner and i (both autistic) as well as me being so uncomfortable and scared about sex that i just basically dissociated and did whatever i thought my partner wanted and being super hypersexual and self degrading, like i would initiate a sex act i didnt want, hate it the whole time, then be so empty and resentful after id start a fight. now i barely ever wanna do anything and have a really hard time knowing how i feel and what i actually want (about anything)

.

[dyketubbo]

goddammit now im mad over the emduo qpr discourse again. everyone owes me so much fucking money for that shit. i know i wasnt the best at wording but genuinely just fucking amazing how me going "hey i want qprs to be seen as their own form of relationship that isnt just headcanons and is its own form of shipping also i think people are weird about how they depict qprs by only ever depicting a romantic relationship but saying /p or by saying shit like 'qpps are platonic soulmates' and not going into how they can often be intimate relationships that isnt always as simple as best friends who get married also its kind of fucking weird that in its own way it contributes to pushing aside a woman whose an important figure to focus on two men and with how ppl treat that woman even outside of this its concerning me" got turned into uh.

the idea that i (an aro person) am arophobic and also against polyam people (even though i wasnt talking about polyam hcs) and also was calling people racist and fatphobic and misogynistic (people are already weird about kristins weight and i felt uncomfortable that her relationship with phil ic was being pushed away when its. canon. i know people dont think she is but she is canon shes the supposed reason a forest grew by the commune and she possessed phil once shes canon to the smp imagine if ppl said drista wasnt canon or something. and some of my discomfort came from the fact that shes a fat woc) and also was "playing the victim" and pulling "the minor card" (i was being harassed and expressed multiple times that the discourse was setting off my paranoia and making me spiral every time i got better and it was upsetting that it was mainly people in their 20s doing this to me, a 16yr old at the time)

and also i guess the idea that I thought qprs were nothing other than best friends?? (that was the entire thing i was arguing against . i wanted qprs to be treated as separate from strictly platonic and strictly romantic relationships. because they are by definition . i wanted them to be treated seriously and for people to stop calling them headcanons because it felt like it was delegitimizing that qprs are a unique kind of relationship and one thats often intimate and heavily committed)

like. auugh. sure if i could go back i would fix some of my wording but i was (and still am) a Teenager . who was uncomfortable and got pushed into spiralling to a point where i couldnt properly escape it (i was condescendedly told to go touch grass but i . Was going outside. consistently. it helped for a short while only for the drama to be shoved in my face all over again which kept setting me off and i couldnt manage to switch out + it was summer during a pandemic like. what else could i do but be online) and like. now i still have lingering trauma and for a good while it ruined techno and phil related content for me. i was terrified of that side of the fandom, only recently have i really been able to shake that off. its scary to know theres still people who think im arophobic or believe all the shit people said about me. when one of my friends tried to defend me one of the main people talking shit found their post and went on to publically talk shit about me to them and it made me. so fucking paranoid that they were tracking my name or some shit

and idk. knowing that for so many people it was just a blip of discourse to meme about and pass on is. a weird experience. that month was horrible for me. it led to me getting nauseous about even romantic shipping in the community (even now i can only really deal with strictly canon dsmp romance) and with how many issues i already had with romance repulsion and figuring out more and more about how alienated i felt from fandom spaces because of my aromanticism it was. i dont know. i still taste bile in my throat every time i think about it.