#pseudopolis yard

[specialsituationsgroup]

Lego Discworld - Pseudopolis Yard

Ankh-Morpork "B model" - Pseudopolis Yard interior during the events of The Truth: - Angua doing "chemical analisys" for Cheery in the forensics lab. - Foul ole Ron revealing Wuffles to Sam Vimes in Sam's office. - Carrot chatting to Otto while doing paperwork in the lobby / filing room. - Scharissa interviewing Igor about Vetinari's condition in the bullpit / break room. - Vetinari "sleeping" in one cell and Drumknott fretting in the next. - Detritus equipping a recruit in the armory.

Pseudopolis Yard exterior with lilac bushes and ivy. Playing around with the wooden frame on the attic.

[headcanonsandmore]

Discworld AU where Agnes Nitt joins the City Watch instead of the opera house.

Is immediately taken under the wing of Angua and Cheery, both of whom find themselves relating to her (Angua because of the dual-mind thing, Cheery because of the physicality thing).

Carrot, of course, knew her family already, and they catch up on how things are back in the Ramtops. Carrot mainly asks about shaft four in Copperhead reopening, but Agnes appreciates the thought nonetheless.

Agnes gets on surprisingly well with Nobby Nobbs. Even gives him pointers of make-up.

Sybil takes a personal interest in Agnes's career, and mentions this to Vimes.

Of course, Vimes unintentionally adds her to his rapidly-expanding mental list of adoptive children. Someone makes a fat joke, and Vimes sees the Look on Agnes's face. He immediately recognises it as the same Look that Sybil has whenever a joke like that is made about her. Vimes takes the perpuator aside for a quiet word; within a few hours, the entire city population knows that they Will Not Ever Make That Sort Of Joke Again.

When Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg arrive in the city and head for Pseudopolis Yard, Granny refuses to step into the Watch House. She quietly states that this territory is Someone Else's. Nanny is about to object but sees the look on Granny's face and quietly agrees. Agnes Nitt is left alone to make her own path, whatever that may be.

[sainamoonshine]

Okay but what if.

Vetinari, post glorious 25th of may and the death of John Keel, gossiping talking with his revolution buddy Rosie Palm. She’s complaining about how much of a rude hot mess Keel was when she first met him and how he ran straight to Pseudopolis yard and then the Ramkins house for some goddamn reason and also didn’t pay her for saving his hide. Vetinari’s like « Ramkins? Why the Ramkins? Are they involved in something? To do with the late John Keel my gay awakening? Better keep an eye on them just in case 🤔 »

And then Vetinari starts hanging out socially with Sybil and that’s how they become friends

[cakesandfail]

It occurs to me that behind this exchange is an entirely separate conversation where Sybil essentially just went HAVELOCK I'M GIVING PSEUDOPOLIS YARD TO THE WATCH and didn't let him argue about it

[burnsopale]

Lord Vetinari studied the bulging, dripping ceiling. "Mmm, yes. I'd say repairs are indeed in order." He turned to Vimes. "May I ask how it happened?"

"Well, Sir, it's just that Pseudopolis Yard wasn't built to house-" Sergeant Detritus lumbered past. Vimes cleared his throat. "Uh ... so many people."

"Ah. Perhaps you might move the locker rooms downstairs?"

A faint moan made them look towards the stairs to the second floor. Drumknott was leaning heavily on the wall and coming downstairs on legs that visibly wobbled.

Vetinari strode forward and held out an arm for the man to support himself on. "What is the matter, Drumknott?"

"Oh, Sir! Oh, my lord, it's horrible!" He was white as a sheep, except for a greenish tinge, like the sheep had rolled in new-cut grass. His eyes were wide and fixed on something far away that haunted him. "I've never ... Not in my worst nightmares ... Oh, Sir!" He buried his face in Vetinari's cravat and sobbed like a child.

Vetinari patted him on the back. "Dear me. Commander Vimes?" he called lightly.

"Yessir?"

"Please do something about the state of your office."

"I have a system, Sir."

Drumknott howled into the cravat.

Vetinari patted him faster. "There, there, Drumknott. Let's get you back to your nice, sorted filing cabinets. I'll even let you reorganise my desk, as a special treat."

"There's nothing wrong with my system!" Vimes called after them as they left. "You can even see the floor in some places!"

[calamitys-child]

RE lrb . Vetinari working out a few years back, actually, now, that Vimes looks and acts and is just a little too much of that mysterious John Keel he had to trail for a week, that week the city boiled with change. Vetinari realising what Vimes is going to have to do. Vetinari seeing Vimes in the morning hale and hearty in full dress uniform and seeing him that evening naked and bloodied and with a scar and an eyepatch and fresh tear tracks and knowing. And he's not stupid, he knows that this doesn't negate the existence of a separate John Keel, cos of quantum, but this is here, and this is now, and Vimes is standing by his own grave trembling with the birth of his son only hours-fresh in his mind, and besides some loony monk sweeping the doorway of pseudopolis yard, he might be the only man in the world who knows what just happened

[mcgruffthecrimedog]

I just want discworld lego sets. There are so many great options!

Imagine putting together the post office or Pseudopolis Yard. You could have Granny Weatherwax's cottage and Unseen University. The plausibilities are endless.

[firstofficerrose]

Angua shows up to Pseudopolis Yard in a borrowed gold sequined dress, carrying six inch heels, and then nearly tears out a man's throat for wolf whistling at her. Need I say iconic?

[auntyrantypants]

My husband had been telling me to read Terry Pratchett since way before he was my husband. He told me there was a book called Good Omens that he thought I’d like so I waited, like, 10 years and then I read it and he was right. Then I read The Colour of Magic and was like hmm, okay, interesting, but I wasn’t blown away and I BARELY remember reading it so I went on with my life and read a ton of Neil Gaiman and Margaret Atwood and a lot of other things, but no more Pratchett, no more Discworld.

Maybe I just wasn’t in need of it yet but when I was going through a hard time I decided to try again and I think I read Reaper Man and fell in love with DEATH, and then because I mostly read whatever is available at the time on Libby I grabbed one of the Witches books and decided that I wanted to BE Granny Weatherwax when I grew up (ha) but in fact was 80% Nanny Ogg and 20% Magrat (no complaints, and I’m Granny when the situation calls for it) and so I read every single Witches book. I’ve been hooked ever since.

I didn’t think I’d love any of the characters more than the witches and thought hey, people love the City Watch books but different strokes for different folks, I’m sure they’re still lovely, I just won’t love them as much and I was SO wrong because Pseudopolis Yard and Ankh Morpork feel like home and I’d kill for Vimes and Carrot and Angua and Vetinari and Colon and Nobbs and all the rest. I love them. I’m reading that series in order and just finished Jingo (my favorite so far) and I’m waiting for The Fifth Elephant to be available. I cannot wait.

Anyway, long, rambling post to say how much I love Discworld and all the people on it and my family is probably getting REALLY sick of hearing about it but phooey on them. And now I’m off to spend some time with Tiffany Aching and the Nac Mac Feegle. I love them too.

[morporkian-cryptid]

✨Lupin III Discworld AU✨

What happens when you drop Earth's greatest thief in a world with werewolves, a Thieve's Guild, a postmaster who's a former conman, and Commander Sam Vimes? Chaos. Chaos is what happens.

Characters introductions here!

.

Headcanons and random ideas!

Lupin III and Moist Von Lipwig

They get along like a house on fire, both figuratively and literally. They're both adrenaline junkies and Lipwig (pronounced Lip-vig) hasn't completely shed his kleptomaniac tendencies. Lupin regularly attemps to rob the Post Office, the Royal Bank and the Royal Mint (all under Lipwig's responsibility). One of the reasons Lord Vetinari tolerates Lupin's presence in Ankh-Morpork is because he gives Lipwig enrichment.

They also sometimes challenge each other to thieving competitions. One of the contests’ goal was to steal Vetinari’s manuscript, The Servant. Fujiko won. She wasn’t even in the race.

When they're not busy competing, Lupin and Lipwig are actually great friends. Lipwig infected Lupin with his pencil-stealing tendencies, to Yata's great despair as he finds his pencils disappearing every time Lupin is brought to Pseudopolis Yard.

Fujiko ended up befriending Adora-Belle Dearheart (Lipwig's rather explosive wife), they get together to lovingly trash-talk their respective S/O. Completely unrelatedly, Fujiko acquired a horse golem (which Adora-Belle swears she didn't give to her).

.

Jigen, sharpshooting, and Archchancellor Ridcully

Jigen is a self-taught sharpshooter, proficient in anything from a slingshot to the infamous gonne (DW's first and only firearm, with a regretful tendency to possess its user and send them into a murderous rage). Jigen religiously reads every issue of Bow and Ammo, and knows by heart the entire crossbow catalogue of Burleigh & Stronginthearm.

Jigen is crossbow-hunting-buddies with Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully of the Unseen University. They bonded over their love of shooting anything that moves, and Mustrum brok- hum hum, circumvented the University's rules to teach a non-wizard a spell. Jigen can now shoot fireballs, to Lupin's endless delight and the Watch's horror. At Jigen's demand, Mustrum also enchanted the Gang's bright-ass yellow carriage to make it go supernaturally fast, in exchange for the opportunity to take a ride in it.

The Gang also had the misfortune of stealing the aforementioned gonne (we're going to ignore that there's no canonical window allowing this to happen). Jigen had heard of it, and Lupin decided to steal it as a gift for his partner. The second he got his hands on the gonne, his moral compass evaporated. He would have even shot his friends, if Jigen hadn't taken the gonne from him... and immediately gotten possessed himself. In the end, Goemon managed to take the gonne from them. He was completely unaffected, a phenomenon he later explained as "being confident in the blade's superiority to filthy morporkian artifacts".

(The gonne doesn't so much "possess" people as by-pass their moral restraints to unearth whatever urges for violence, power and destruction they have. Which I think would be a very interesting thing to happen to Lupin.)

.

Lupin and dragons

The Gang owns a swamp dragon (very small and pathetic creatures with a tendency to explode at the slightest inconvenience). Lupin uses it to melt safes open, and to light his and Jigen's cigarettes.

Aside from this blatant mis-use of an endangered creature, the dragon is actually very well treated, and in time has become a sort of mascot of the Gang. His name is Sir Arson Burp-A-Lot Lupin.

Lupin (the human) is a regular at the Sunshine Sanctuary for Sick Dragons, and has a false identity entirely dedicated to visiting the Sanctuary. He managed to befriend Lady Sybil Ramkin, owner of the Sanctuary and wife of Commander Vimes of the City Watch. Goemon disapproves of the whole situation, and Jigen finds it hilarious, regularly joking that Lupin is playing with fire.

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The Gang and lycanthropy

It is common knowledge that Lupin's Gang includes a werewolf. Lupin thinks that everyone thinks he is the werewolf (because he's posh and has a wolf-related name), but actually everyone knows it's Jigen. It's a bit baffling as there are no werewolves in the Agatean Empire, and Jigen has no known Überwaldian ancestors.

Thanks to Jigen's lycanthropy, the Gang is fully aware that the Watch's resident werewolf is Angua Von Überwald (and not Nobby Nobbs as is the common belief). They unfortunately can't use scent bombs to ward her off as it would hurt Jigen, but following these stinky thieves is just as bad for her nose. They smell like a tobacco factory that has caught on fire.

It took a lot of time for Jigen to tell Lupin about his "condition", and Lupin (who easily put two and two together after seeing Jigen leave to gods-know-where every full moon and growl when he's angry) didn't press him and waited for him to open up about it. Growing up, Jigen had always seen his lycanthropy as monstrous, but Lupin's delight at having 1) a big fluffy cuddlable boyfriend and 2) someone who can smell the police coming, eventually made Jigen feel more comfortable with his gift. Lupin and Goemon both adore Jigen's wolf form (although Goemon would rather die than admit it out loud). Jigen almost bit off Fujiko's hand the only time she tried to pet him.

.

More miscellaneous headcanons here!

If you have ideas, headcanons, or even just vague vibes for this AU, please do reblog, comment or send me an ask!

[branmer]

cant believe it was only recently that i finally clocked the joke in the watch's hq being at pseudopolis yard how many years have i been reading discworld and letting my eyes blithely slide on past that salkjalkdsjadslkj

[mikehaysbooks]

#Inktober Armadillo. In the Pseudopolis Yard Watch House, Corporal Nobby Nobbs demonstrates his new policing tactic, the Armor-Dillo, much to the delight of Captain Carrot and the dismay of Sergeant Colon. As Nobby notes, the tactic is perfect for handling riot situations. #InktoberArmadillo #Inktober2022 #Discworld #SirTerryPratchett #NobbyNobbs https://www.instagram.com/p/CjxwFyFOj9Y/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[cosmicspaceslug]

Have only just realized that Pseudopolis in Discworld literally translates as “Fake City”

[i-ate-nt-dead]

He spotted several more gargoyles on the way across the bridge to Pseudopolis Yard. Every single one of them turned its head to watch him.

-The Truth, Terry Pratchett

(Photo: Gargoyle #3 by DeepLightPhotography. Description: photo of a gargoyle on the Notre Dame cathedral. It is carved in stone, with wings and small horns. It has its chin in its hands and its tongue stuck out. The city of Paris is visible behind it and a slightly overcast sky. )

[professorsparklepants]

During Young Sam's teen years, there's an epidemic of teen sleuths from affluent families running around Ankh-Morpork. He's not involved in every instance, but he's at the scene of the arrest often enough that he spent almost three years straight between 14 and 17 being grounded.

[grifalinas]

-clears throat-

B99 Ankh-Morpork au.