#reason one is because of that one topic and the secondary reason is cause can people just tell me they hate me and don’t want to be friends

[kavehater]

I need Santa Eid to give me a lobotomy for Eid al-Fitr

[actual-changeling]

It was actually rather hard to decide how to begin this meta post because there are essentially going to be two main parts: why Crowley does not actually avoid/run from his problems and why "going off" is not a bad thing regardless.

Then I wrote the first part and realised this is now 2.5k words long, so uhhhh I will grant part 2 its own post.

With that, welcome back to Alex's today-not-unhinged meta corner!

I am going to approach this topic from a psychological angle, which a lot of people have already done, but without explicitly mentioning it or going into depth. All my information comes from personal experience, research, my therapist, and my psychiatrist, just so you know I am not making shit up. I actually dug up some resources my therapist gave me a while ago.

Generally, there are four different fear/survival responses: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn. Most people have probably heard about fight and flight, since those two are usually the only ones that are mentioned/taught, so I will stick to explaining the other two.

"Fawning" refers to actively being submissive and subdued, both physically and emotionally. The goal is to appear non-threatening and to calm whoever is causing the fear response in the first place. It shows up as being overly agreeable, not having thoughts/opinions of your own and ignoring them if you do, your body language changing (e.g., making yourself smaller, taking up less space), and generally attempting to 'keep the peace' or reinstate it.

"Freezing" is pretty much exactly what it says on the tin—you freeze. It means slipping into a dissociative state, which disconnects you from your body, your emotions/mind, and/or the outside world. Usually, people stop being able to talk well or at all, they do not move, and if they do, it is on autopilot; you do not fight or flee, you simply exist until what is causing the fear response is over.

While dissociating, your brain is unable to form full memories—and depending on how heavily you are dissociating, it does not form any memories at all. 

Freezing as a response happens when fight, flight, and fawn aren't possible anymore, e.g., a child who has no internal mechanisms to deal with large amounts of fear because it's a child, so the only way to escape the pain and aggressor is by fleeing into your mind and shutting down.

Why am I telling you all this? Because most people tend to have one or two survival responses that dominate/they usually fall back on, and the same goes for Aziraphale and Crowley.

When faced with an outside problem and a lot of stress, Aziraphale's first instinct is to fawn, to placate the person, to diffuse the situation, to make sure everyone is agreeing, or, at the very least, submitting to authority figures or aggressors. It is what heaven teaches them—stick to the rules, don't ask questions, do what you are told. If fawning involves lying, he will do so, here the need for safety is stronger than his desire to be truthful and stick to his morals.

Unfortunately, the fact that this is his primary fear response is also the reason behind his extreme cognitive dissonance. How can you stick to the rules when you do not know what the rules ARE? So he is stuck trying to figure out what is "good" and what is "bad" so he can be a good angel and avoid doing anything that might be seen as bad or disobedient.

His secondary response to stress or fear is to fight—once it's clear that fawning won't work, he can and will switch over to being more direct and aggressive/less submissive. We see that happening when he gets discorporated in season 1 and needs to get back to earth, at the airbase, or when the bookshop gets attacked.

If I were to ask you what you think Crowley's primary fear response is, how would you respond?

Well, if you said "flight"—you're wrong, and I will explain why.

Flight is his secondary fear response, it is what he falls back on in absolute emergencies when everything is doomed and there's nothing he can do anymore.

Before that, though, he fights.

Even as an angel, he was already questioning the system, he was ready to go and tell God she was doing a terrible job, that her ideas were bad, that he wants to keep his stars and the universe— six thousand years are nothing! If you actively oppose existing rules and defy people's authority over you, fighting is the only option you have unless you plan on giving up or the response becomes too much to deal with.

Fear itself happens when you or someone/something you love is being threatened (whether that threat is real or simply perceived as such doesn't matter), plus there are a large number of more irrational fears.

Crowley's creations were threatened -> He goes against the rules, he wants to fight for them.

On the walls of Eden, he questions God and talks to an angel, his hereditary enemy, once again defying the rules, questioning them.

Job and his children were threatened -> He goes against orders to try and save them.

There is good reason to believe he went against God by saving some of the children from the flood.

He showed Jesus the kingdoms of the world—do we really think that was based on orders? No, it was once again Crowley not playing by the rules.

Wessex? He proposes the Arrangement, which is one gigantic "fuck you" in his fight against celestial rules. Everything after that goes back to Crowley knowing that their jobs suck and that they can cheat, fight the system by working together. In 1827, it gets him pulled to hell and punished, and yet he does not stop; he keeps fighting.

Crowley is the one who immediately tries to stop the apocalypse. Aziraphale needs to be talked into it, needs to be convinced with selfish reasons and personal pleasure.

The reason why both heaven and hell absolutely loathe him is not because he is a runner; it's because he constantly and consistently defies them. He fights.

In season two, he immediately tries to deal with the Gabriel problem while Aziraphale is standing behind him and saying "I don't know" to all of his questions. Taking him somewhere so they can figure shit out in peace is not 'running'—it's smart. Sure, it's far from ideal, but we see what keeping him in the bookshop brought them, don't we? The hiding miracle is what tipped heaven and hell off in the first place.

Aziraphale goes to Edinburgh based on a hunch, but once again—did that help? Did his journalist roleplay trip actually provide vital information that solved a single puzzle piece of that mess? No. Finding out that Gabriel was at that pub with some mystery person was a nice fact to know, but that's it.

During the ball, Crowley is scared, vigilant, prowling around the shop, checking windows, telling Aziraphale to "stop this charade" so they can figure out what to do. Aziraphale, in that moment, was already convinced that sticking to the rules would save them—a heavenly embassy on a technicality, surely the group of fallen angels who got booted due to not following heaven's rules will respect that.

Crowley goes to heaven, which is once again him actively looking for a solution, while Aziraphale also falls back on fighting because fawning is not going to do shit.

There are three times during which Crowley suggests fleeing—which is his secondary fear response—but those are exceptions. Let's have a look at them.

The first one is at the bandstand, the evening before the Apocalypse, and since Aziraphale is lying to him, the situation seems hopeless to him. Yet he is still having his 'agents' look for him, is still fighting.

Do you know why he even suggests running? He is about to leave when Aziraphale calls him back with "there isn't anywhere to go," and now allow me to insert the following passage from the scriptbook.

Crowley looks back. He looks at Aziraphale. Above them, a beautiful starry sky. And Crowley softens.

"Big universe. Even if this all ends up in a puddle of burning goo, we could go off together."

The sentence in the show is slightly different, but they have one thing in common: If.

IF the world ends, we can still leave and be together. IF.

Crowley is NOT saying "let's leave", he is presenting Aziraphale with a contingency plan in case stopping the Apocalypse does not work. He is NOT running, he isn't even SUGGESTING to run.

It's a "if the world ends, we can be together. We don't need to be with hell or heaven; we can be in the stars," because remember what the end of the world would mean? Eternal torture for Crowley while Aziraphale bores himself to death in heaven.

The next time he suggests it again—when he stops Aziraphale on the street—several things have happened.

First, he did not leave. If he truly wanted to flee, he would have by now, but he didn't. He sits in a cinema waiting for the end: "Out of time. Out of hope," as Neil puts it. Then Hastur and Ligur show up on screen and tell him, 'You're dead meat, Crowley. You're bloody history. […] We're coming to collect you'.

We all know that means "eternal torture in hell," but if you're not convinced for some reason, have another snippet from the script book that did not make it into the show.

Dagon is speaking from the Bentley's radio while he drives towards the bookshop, saying that something has gone wrong and they're sure he has a 'perfectly reasonable explanation' for it. Once he gets out of the car, however, Dagon still keeps going and says the following:.

"Your explanation, and the circumstances that will accompany it, will provide a source of entertainment for all the damned of hell, Crowley. Because no matter what agonies the damned are suffering, Crowley, you will have it worse."

Crowley already knows that. He has been punished by them before, heard, seen, lived torture, there is no doubt as to what will happen should they catch him. So he does what any person with a single fucking brain cell would do—he tries to get his loved one and FLEE.

Flight is the best response in this situation, and if you need me to explain why, then honestly, I cannot help you anymore. I won't go into detail about Aziraphale's response, but, tl;dr, it was shitty and incredibly hurtful, go figure.

Now, let's get to situation number 3, which is his speech during the final fifteen. We do not have an official script for that, but someone did make transcriptions for all episodes; you can find them here. Additionally, I will copy some of what I already said in a different meta post.

Crowley, stuck in his trauma-induced hypervigilance and paranoia, suggests putting as much distance between them and the problem as possible. I think it is interesting that in ep1 he wants to get Gabriel away from them, while at the end of the season, he is ready to get them away from the problem.

So far, I have never seen anyone mention that change! And it’s important! The entire season, it is hammered into our heads how much they love being on earth. It is THEIR bookshop and THEIR car and THEIR life.

Crowley wants to protect that home, and Gabriel is a threat to it, a threat to both of them, their life, the bookshop—everything. He does not want to leave, he wants his peace and angel in one place.

Yet by allowing Gabriel to stay, Aziraphale destroyed the sense of comfort and safety Crowley had slowly developed over the last few decades. Heaven nipping down every now and then to check in with Aziraphale is very different from him sheltering the Supreme Archangel who is running from ‘something terrible’ without even asking if he’s alright with that.

Aziraphale calls it their bookshop, but he fundamentally still sees it as his space to govern and Crowley as a guest; he even calls it a 'heavenly embassy'.

After another horrible week and having his previously safe space violated by several different times and beings, Crowley is back to where he was before—without a home. That fragile existence broke apart, so he is standing in the heap of shards and telling Aziraphale 'I don’t feel safe here anymore, let’s leave’.

He lost his safe space, but he still has his safe person, his best and only friend, the person he loves. I doubt he cares where exactly they go as long as they’re together and it’s safe.

Returning to heaven—it is the one place Crowley cannot follow him to. It’s literally the worst option, he can’t go back, he won’t go back. So he invokes the bookshop again, if you don’t want to stay for me, stay for the bookshop, your books, your corner of existence that I thought we had carved out for ourselves.

There is a common error that people make regarding the timeline, which is assuming that during this conversation they are already aware of the impending apocalypse—but they aren't. Aziraphale himself has no clue, and while Crowley saw the conversation and trial, he does NOT know when it will happen. For all he knows, it could be tomorrow, could be in a thousand years, and, even if he had been given a date, I doubt they laid out all the details and how to stop it.

Considering that his original plan was "get drunk at the Ritz and then have us time," I don't think he knew literally anything about how or when to stop it. So no, Crowley does NOT suggest running away from earth and leaving it to die.

All he wants is some bloody peace and quiet where no demons, angels, or power-hungry floating heads can interrupt them. A space that is safe and theirs. There are also zero mentions of where he wants them to go; he is not talking about the stars or the universe. He wants to get away from where they currently are because heaven and hell show up uninvited whenever they please.

If your boss and ex-boss constantly kicked down your front door and stated their wish to torture you, would you stay there or would you move? Yeah.

This post got very long, but it was long overdue.

I am tired of seeing people call Crowley a callous coward who always runs away from his problems when he is the literal opposite. You take three sentences said under exceptional circumstances and apply them to Crowley as a whole, when it is nothing but his last ditch effort to keep himself and Aziraphale safe.

One last thing: If you come onto my post and start aggressively arguing about this, I will block you. Genuine discussions and questions are always welcome, being a dick is not, and I also simply cannot handle some of the rhetoric people in this fandom perpetuate because it's very triggering.

Make your own post, don't do it on mine.

[bad268]

hiii could you please write about y/n’s trust issues and insecurities because of her mentally abusive father so she is hesitant to be in a relationship with pedri but in every instance pedri affirms her that she’s worthy and comforts her and that he will always wait for her until she’s ready and one day she decides that she can’t keep him waiting anymore and tells him ever since she left her father she has only found comfort in him and that’s when pedri really uses every second of his time to love her

it’s fine if you choose not to write abt it ik it’s a little bit of a sensitive topic

+ exes to lovers again for pedri plzzz

A Second Chance (Pedri X Reader)

Fandom: RPF/FCB

Requested: Clearly (I was working on the exes to lovers when this came in and I completely changed it because I had an idea)

Warnings: Toxic family/father

POV: Third Person (They/them)

W.C. 1222

Summary: After being separated once, Pedri's not letting Y/n go.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Pinterest)

The story begins when they were five. Y/n lived with their single father right next to Pedri. They started playing futbol outside together, and the rest was history. They grew together from going to school together, to trying for the second squad for Barcelona. They did it together.

Around the time they started secondary school, they decided to try being a couple. It was in secret, of course. Y/n’s father was overbearing to put it lightly. This was the only way they could even pursue anything: in private. Plus, Y/n’s father had no control over them in school. It was their safe haven.

Y/n and Pedri were the staple couple until Pedri started moving up in the second Barcelona team, and he had to switch to online school. Y/n was heartbroken, but they tried to maintain their relationship.

One day, Y/n walked over to Pedri’s house, and they were inside his house for too long apparently, causing their father to come in wreaking havoc. Y/n’s father went on a rampage, shouting and degrading them, calling them names, even going as far as to say that their relationship was the reason Y/n was not progressing as quickly as Pedri in the second team.

The next thing he did was drastic. After dragging Y/n back to their house and locking them in their room, he packed up their lives and moved them in the dead of night. Y/n’s father changed their names and moved them away from Pedri. Not a sound or trace could be connected to them.

Years later, Y/n made it into the big leagues. Real Madrid was the second team they moved to after relocating, and they eventually moved Y/n up to their first team. Y/n never mentions that they played for the Barcelona team simply because their father forbade them from talking about their life before.

Y/n tried to see how Pedri was doing nowadays, but their father was constantly breathing down their neck. Y/n wished they could have done anything more to stay with Pedri since they never lost their love for him.

One day, Y/n was sitting with their teammates as normal before practice when Carlo, their head coach, pulled Y/n aside.

“You requested a trade?” Carlo asked as soon as they stepped foot into his office.

“I did. I feel like I deserve more play time, and if another team is willing to give it, I want to transfer,” Y/n explained calmly after taking a seat in front of him. They had practiced this hundreds of times. This was the first stage of their plan to get away from their father. “I agreed to come to Real Madrid despite not being from Madrid because you told me I’d get play time. I’m tired of being a benchwarmer. I have stats to prove that I can play with every other player. I just want the chance to show it.”

“We don’t have the space for you on the field unless someone retires or gets injured,” Carlo sighed, knowing what was coming.

“Then I want the freedom to be transferred to another team. I want to be allowed to look for other options. My contract says I will start in at least 10 matches in my first year, and we’re coming to the end of the season. I have started in 2,” Y/n argued. They knew this was an impossible feat for Real Madrid to fill, so they could also receive a bonus for this. “If I’m not being utilized here, I want the ability to go elsewhere.”

“Fine,” Carlo sighed, pulling up a document that was already signed. This was a standard contract that outlined that if the player could not find a new team, they would be resigned for two years on a decreased pay. “Here’s an agreement form that allows you to look for outside options, and if you can’t find one-”

“I already did,” Y/n cut him off, leaving him shocked. Y/n had heard from fellow teammates who tried to leave, and they all said to look around first and not sign anything until it’s been confirmed with another team. Thankfully, your new team was willing to take you in as soon as possible.

“You started looking before it was approved?”

“I had to see if there would be interest for me elsewhere, and it turns out, Barcelona is looking for a midfielder,” Y/n explained with a small smile. “I’ve enjoyed my time with Real Madrid, but the contract I’ve made with Xavi has me starting at the next game. I wish you and the team luck going forward.”

There was nothing left to be said as Y/n stood up, shook Carlo’s hand and left the facility after saying goodbye to their teammates. They knew the plan. Their father thought practice ran late that day, so while he was at work, they packed up only the most essential stuff and left. They blocked his number, threw out the phone he gave them, and got on the first bus to Barcelona.

Y/n had been working with Xavi for weeks on this. There was already an apartment and phone ready for when Y/n got there, all in their name. There was nothing connecting them to their father anymore. Y/n was finally free.

The next day was their first practice, and while Y/n did not get much sleep the night before, they still showed up bright and early. And when they laid eyes on Pedri, it was like all of the pieces fell into place.

The two started hanging out during practice and after matches, on days there was no training. Basically, any free time was spent together again. Despite everything in Y/n telling them they were safe to be with Pedri again, they always hesitated.

“He’s gonna find me,” Y/n confessed one day while they were cuddling with Pedri and watching a movie. “I just know it, and I’m gonna lose you again.”

“You’re never gonna lose me,” He whispered back as he lifted their head to meet his eyes. He placed kisses around their face as he made his next points, “Not tonight. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Not next month. Not now. Not ever.” He pulled back again before ghosting his lips over theirs, “Now that I have you again, I’m not letting you go.”

“But what if he-”

“I don't care what he tries,” Pedri interrupted, sitting up straighter to show his seriousness. “I do not care if this guy threatens my life. I am not letting him take you away from me. We’ll keep running if we have to or we’ll move in together somewhere he can’t get to. I promise to protect you from him through thick and thin. Tell me what I can say to make you believe me.”

“You’ve said enough,” Y/n mumbled as they leaned in for another kiss. It conveyed every emotion, every feeling, every thought unsaid. It was the restart of something Y/n thought they lost and Pedri prayed for.

A second chance. A second chance to prove he was meant for them, and he would spend every waking moment showing Y/n everything they’re worth.

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[evidence-based-activism]

Wouldn’t it be better to see how many men are actually raping and how many support it. Or how many women are getting raped by men. Than just saying men commit 99% of rape/SA? Because like idk wouldn’t it be like saying you should be wary of black people because they commit most violent crime? But most black people don’t commit violent crime.

At least one in three men around the world openly admit to abusing or raping women.

At least one in three women around the world self-report being abused or raped by men.

These stats are both based on self-report, which likely means they are both under-estimates (reasons in linked posts).

It is also useful to describe the demographics of abusers and rapists. The fact that the vast majority of abusers (90+%) and rapists are men (post 1, post 2, post 3) indicates that this is a gendered phenomenon. It would be a different story if there was sex parity in offenders and victims, but there isn't, so such statistics are useful.

---

"Because like idk wouldn’t it be like saying you should be wary of black people because they commit most violent crime?"

No. This is a common comparison drawn and it is both misogynistic and racist.

First, black people do not commit "most" violent crime. According to the 2022 Bureau of Justice report black people (primarily men) committed ~25% of violent offenses and made up ~12% of the population, indicating a 2:1 offender-to-population ratio. While this is a disproportionate representation, it also isn't "most".

Second, while research on this topic is contentious and ongoing, there is substantial evidence that this offending gap is not caused by race but by differences in other environmental factors that happen to correlate with race (in the USA specifically, but also in some other countries examined).

For example:

Younger adults are substantially more likely to commit crimes than older adults [2], and the black American age distribution is much younger than the white American age distribution [3]

Urban areas have higher rates of crime [2] and a greater proportion of black Americans live in urban areas [4]

This articles [5] suggests that the key factor driving racial differences in criminal behavior is intergenerational mobility. Specifically, "black Americans and American Indians have much lower rates of upward mobility and higher rates of downward mobility than whites, leading to persistent disparities across generations ... Hispanic Americans have rates of intergenerational mobility more similar to whites than blacks, leading the Hispanic-white income gap to shrink across generations."

This review [6] found an "excess risk for criminal behavior in adulthood exists when an individual is exposed to lead in utero or in the early years of childhood" and this longitudinal examination [7] shows "alarming racial disparities in toxic exposure."

These were just a few examples of how some secondary factor(s) that is correlated with race (but, importantly, not caused by race) in America can explain the racial gap in criminal offending. This indicates that the racial gap is an illusory correlation.

In contrast, men are the primary perpetrators of almost every crime, across all societies, for every demographic, throughout all of history [8].

References under the cut:

Alexandra Thompson & Susannah N. Tapp. (2023). Criminal victimization, 2022 (307089; Criminal Victimization). Bureau of Justice Statistics. https://bjs.ojp.gov/library/publications/criminal-victimization-2022

Who Commits Crime? (2015). In Social Problems. University of Minnesota. https://web.archive.org/web/20240818215340/https://open.lib.umn.edu/socialproblems/chapter/8-3-who-commits-crime/

Schaeffer, K. (2019, July 30). The most common age among whites in U.S. is 58 – more than double that of racial and ethnic minorities. Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2019/07/30/most-common-age-among-us-racial-ethnic-groups/

Igielnik, K. P., Juliana Menasce Horowitz, Anna Brown, Richard Fry, D’Vera Cohn and Ruth. (2018, May 22). 1. Demographic and economic trends in urban, suburban and rural communities. Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2018/05/22/demographic-and-economic-trends-in-urban-suburban-and-rural-communities/

Chetty, R., Hendren, N., Jones, M. R., & Porter, S. R. (2020). Race and economic opportunity in the United States: An intergenerational perspective. The Quarterly Journal of Economics, 135(2), 711-783.

Talayero, M. J., Robbins, C. R., Smith, E. R., & Santos-Burgoa, C. (2023). The association between lead exposure and crime: A systematic review. PLOS global public health, 3(8), e0002177.

Sampson, Robert, Alix Winter. "The Racial Ecology of Lead Poisoning." Du Bois Rev. 13, no. 2(2016): 261-283. DOI: 10.1017/s1742058x16000151

Steffensmeier, D., & Allan, E. (n.d.). Gender and crime. https://www.encyclopedia.com/law/legal-and-political-magazines/gender-and-crime

[a-lilac-lyric]

 Possible explanations for why King Roland made his first wish on the Wishing Well

Now all of these aren't so much theories per say as “throwing stuff on a wall and seeing what sticks” because the showrunners could not delve into topics like this in the actual runtime, and it probably wouldn't have been very relevant to the story that they were trying to tell anyway, so nearly every theory has an equal likelihood to be true more or less.

  (I'm also not going to mention this in my write ups for the possible reasons for the wish, and we have no way of proving this one way or the other, but I'm always inclined to prefer the thought that Roland II had discussed making the wish with Lorelei before he actually made it since it would be something that would affect both of them. Even if it only physically affected one of them. Because this just seems like the type of thing you should tell your partner about if you do it).

 This is a long post (Over 2000 words), so I'm putting it under the cut, but TLDR there are several different magical and physical reasons that are possible.

 General content warning for discussion of topics that are too dark/medical to ever be shown in a kids show. Spoilers for Forever Royal.

 We should first start off with what the wish was in the first place in case you don't know or need a refresher. Word for word, this is how it's stated in the flashback scene in the episode Forever Royal:

  “In the nearby castle lived King Roland the Second, who had wanted a family so badly he tried making a wish in a wishing well. The wish came true, and twins were born. But the Queen fell gravely ill….* The children were happy but never knew what it was like to have a mother.”

 * The quote never says that she is dead in so many words, but the visual on screen is of the queen arranged on a bed with her eyes closed, holding flowers. There's basically no other way to interpret it except that she's been laid out for a funeral.

 Now, as a note, we never actually get to hear what her name is in the show, but the creator of the show Craig Gerber made a Twitter post saying that her name was Lorelei https://x.com/CraigGerber_/status/1038831208430370817?mx=2 (as a personal note I normally consider stuff that show creators or writers say on Twitter or other social media as secondary Canon, but I basically completely accept this because we don't have any alternative name, and it works. And I'm sure that they'd use it in the sequel series if they ever talk about her.) So I'm going to be referring to her with that name for the rest of this post.

 When analyzing this quote, it seems that “wanted a family” basically means “wanted to have biological children” since we know he already has a wife and family members like a sister and a mom. I just think it's interesting that they word it this way because it kind of masks what his actual wording would have been to the wishing well. Because in the episode “When you wish upon a well” the well did grant Amber’s second wish in a way that fulfilled the basic criteria of her wish, and yet caused an unintended side effect that deeply distressed Amber and put Sofia in danger. So, it could possibly be that the way Roland wished for children could also be interpreted as accidentally directly causing Lorelei’s death. But we don't know what the words were, so we don't know if that was what happened or not. “Fell gravely ill” is a vague enough statement that it can basically be interpreted to fit any kind of theory.

 So without further ado, here are almost all of the ways I could think of that could be motivation for making the wish. (AKA infertility theories.)

Magical reasons:

 In this world, magic is an everyday fact of life, so they could have been unable to have kids because of a curse! Now it could be a curse on either Roland or Lorelei, and then the curse was just too strong to be broken by regular magic, but the Well’s magic was strong enough to get past it, (permanently or temporarily). The possible motives could be basically anything. It could have been cast by a jealous ex-lover, or a person who thought that the union was bad for political reasons.

 But I did come up with a fun little theory that maybe it was a curse that was intended to be benevolent, behold: The Double Bloodline Curse!

 We know that the throne of Enchancia passes from oldest child to oldest child, and the same seems to be true for the royal wizard as well. Both lines are hereditary, and both are always parallel to each other. It makes sure that the reigning monarch always has a royal wizard and vice versa. But it is interesting because Roland the First and Goodwin the Great are approximately the same age, same with both of their sons, and both of their granddaughters to an extent, although the age difference is seemingly larger between Amber and Calista.

 Now this could be just a coincidence that the people in these families born for 3 generations are very close in age, but what if it wasn't? What if there was some kind of spell or curse set on the people from both bloodlines so that they wouldn't be able to have children until their counterpart(s) was/(were) also in a position to be able to have children. Let's say that Roland the Second married and tried to have kids, but both Cedric and Cordelia were not married or seeing anyone and/or just neither of them were interested in having children at that time. Therefore, the curse activated to prevent Roland II from having any children.

 And this curse was probably put on the line by an actual royal wizard from it, assuming that it would be better off for both families and the sake of the kingdom if the new monarch and the new wizard were always peers age wise so that they could both ascend to their positions at the same time. Is that flawed reasoning and ultimately going to hurt their families more than help them in the long run? Absolutely! But it wouldn't be the craziest or worst thing that someone from either of these families has done.

 It's definitely possible for it to be magical reasons and would be interesting to explore in fanfic, but this isn't the only possibility.

Biological reasons that are linked to infertility:

 The first one is what if Lorelei was unable to biologically have children.

 It's popular fan-cannon (and I have seen it used in several fan fictions), that Lorelei was too physically weak for her body to/she had some kind of physical condition that meant she couldn't bear children. But the wish overrode that condition and after giving birth she was so weak that whatever possible illness/birth complications/regular pregnancy recovery happened afterwards she wasn't strong enough to survive it.

 In my opinion this one seems plausible, but I personally do not like it and do not think it makes sense for the characters. If she seemed medically unfit to give birth before the wish, then it would be ludicrously irresponsible for Roland II to make a wish for her to have the kids that didn't also strengthen her in a way that she could have them and survive. Additionally, I believe that if there was a lot of worry throughout the pregnancy that she might not be able to survive it, that Roland would have just made a second wish for her to be strong enough.

 Some may argue that it wouldn't have been possible to strengthen her enough to be able to survive giving birth, but may I point out that the wishing well has the ability to turn a regular human girl into a cat. Like literally change your species. Strengthening someone enough so that they can survive a pregnancy seems pretty minor compared to turning someone into a cat.

 And Roland is normally pretty good at noticing when people he loves are in distress, he'll stop what he's doing and talk with them and try to make the situation better. Now if Lorelei was hiding her physical symptoms from everyone for whatever reason, it could be possible to do that with others especially servants who she didn't spend much time with, but considering how much time Roland spends with Miranda he probably spent the same amount of time with his first wife. If they were in close proximity to each other that often for months on end he would notice if something was wrong and ask her about it and try to solve the problem. Therefore, I personally don't subscribe to it in my own headcanons.

 Another interpretation of this is that Lorelei was the one who is unable to have children, but it was because of some type of condition that was not due to weakness but another type of biological factor(s). The wish allowed her to have the kids, but then she died because the Well directly took her life as a price for the wish/because of how the wish was worded. Or she just happened to get unlucky and die from one of the several medical reasons that a person can die from giving birth no matter their physical strength. It's pretty similar to the first one but I am much more inclined towards it.

 But what if Roland was the one who was biologically unable to have children?

 This one doesn't seem to be explored in any fan fictions I've seen but I think this one is interesting to consider as well. I think most people's reasoning is that if Lorelei died from the wish, then the wish must have just physically affected her and therefore cause [wish] equals effect [death], but if it was going to take her life as a price/consequence for the wish anyway, it may not have necessarily needed to have affected her physically at all. Or the Well never took her life at all, she just got really unlucky and died from random chance. And there's plenty of medical reasons that men can be unable to have children. We don't know what kind of medical knowledge they have in Enchancia, but it may not have been advanced enough to find a solution for Roland or even know that he was the one who was infertile.

 He could have caught an illness as a child that had adult infertility as a side effect (angst potential. If he was also isolated for a long period of time away from other kids this could also partially explain why he became estranged from Cedric). Or it could be a genetic reason, like being intersex (I say as I read that one of the most common noticeable effects of Klinefelter syndrome is being tall. And it would fulfill a certain letter for possible LGBTQIA+ headcannons). Or he could have been severely overworking and under eating (there are a few times in the show where he does this, albeit not to a self-destructive extent, and that’s after he’s had kids and been king for years, also angst potential).

 If this was true, then it could also be possible that he was only temporarily able to have kids depending on how the wish worked. Or depending on the wording of the wish he might only be able the have kids with Lorelei exclusively. So if he and Miranda wanted to make a kid together, they might not be able to (more angst), unless another wish was made (but I doubt he would risk it).

 And a really dark possibility for Roland being infertile is that maybe the wish did NOT make him fertile but instead had a, what I am going to describe as a “love potion” effect on Lorelei and she got pregnant from someone who was not Roland. Now I think that this possibility is really horrifying for a number of reasons, but I've never seen it used in a fanfiction before and I'm not sure if anyone else has ever thought of it, but it exists now. I say that Amber and James do look like Roland, but I would also say that they definitely look more like Lorelei than him, so if you wanted to do a horrifying big drama fanfic this is a possibility for that.

Biological/other reasons that are not infertility:

 But what if their trouble with having children wasn't linked to infertility?

 There is the possibility that Royal Prep/other schools they had gone to had such a terrible sex education class that neither of them knew how to get pregnant and at this point were too afraid to ask. So they wished for it instead. I think this one only works if you're going for an adult humor fanfiction because, this just seems really unlikely to me. Even if they hadn't been educated in school, they would probably still ask someone or have been told by someone or have read it in a book by this point. Especially since part of their job as ruling monarchs is to produce heirs, I'm sure someone in the court would have explained it to them if they didn't know.

 Another slightly more reasonable but still unlikely reason is that maybe one or both of them was asexual. So they needed another way to start the pregnancy and decided magic was a good way to do it. I feel like if this was true then they could have just solved this by going to an actual wizard or doctor and getting help from them, so I don't think this is very likely but I'm trying to go through all the possibilities here.

 But on a far more serious note there as been a possibility I've been thinking about lately that does seem likely considering how often it happens in real life. It could be possible that Roland and Lorelei had already tried to have children, and she was able to get pregnant, but it ended in a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Maybe she was already pregnant by the time Roland made the wish, and he wished that this time it would be a successful pregnancy. The way he looks in the flashback makes it seem like Roland is really sad and kind of desperate about the whole situation and if this possibility was true, then it adds an extra layer of sadness to the whole ordeal.

 ****Also, this isn't attached to any single theory but I wanted to add this: I think that whether the wish caused Lorelei’s death or she died from completely natural causes, it must have happened fairly quickly. If the illness that she got after giving birth lasted a long time, then wouldn't there have been enough time for Roland to have made another wish to save her? Meanwhile if it happened very quickly or without much warning then he may not have had enough time to save her. If it happened quickly, it would also mean that there was less of a chance for the doctors or midwives or sorcerers to do anything to save her.

 *****And regardless of whether it actually was the magic of the wish that killed her or it was from the same causes that any non magical birth can suffer from, I think Roland believes that it was his fault that Lorelei died. He probably doesn't know for sure whether it was the wish that did it or not, but that wouldn't matter if he felt like it was his fault. His exact words to Amber about it were: “My wish didn't turn out so well either.” But we know that he loves Amber and James, and he's very proud of them, so the quote isn't about being a father to them or their existence. So the only other possibility for him saying that it didn't turn out well is what happened to Lorelei.

On that note, those are all the reasons I could think of. Feel to say in the reblogs or comments which one you think is most likely and/or which one is your favorite. Here's a cookie for getting to the end of this post 🍪

[beesmygod]

i think another issue with webcomics having any scene or being taken seriously at all is that its a lot of stale air, everybody got captured by ig/twitter/tumblr and subsequently become trapped in the trappings and style of those websites. all discussion is couched in the boring 'fandom' subculture on websites with pre-built in infinite scroll and shit search, so updates to their comics or body of work are just as ephemeral as posts that are basically 'lol i farted on my dog' and any criticism is 'just being mean' or 'dogpiling on a poor artist'. not to mention any discoverability of anything new is basically going down the twitter/instagram likes of 'known quantities' for your own comic taste because of how atrophied any discussion around the medium has become

I dont see any way to escape this beyond social media dying a brutal and unprofitable death

trying to argue against the webtoons/IG model was entirely pointless the few times i tried, but its a topic that's hard for me to not devolve into frustrated sputtering about. it's so obviously antithetical to the purpose of making art, enjoying things, creation, joy, goodness, etc. and i would, frankly completely irrationally, be framed as someone who had it out for vertical strips. a sentiment which makes no sense unless you assume im the biggest moron and dipshit in the world. im sure arguing against someone is easier when the position you saddle them with is a seriously stupid one.

the inevitable downward spiral of these platforms feels entirely predictable. any model that revolves around quantity over quality is an obviously flawed one in most circumstances but when applied to art its completely absurd. the ideal artist for these websites are people who have no interest in contributing to a vaster landscape of complex works and instead are hyper-focused on being part of a large scale skinner box experiment for adults with compulsive spending issues. the artists themselves have severe numbers poisoning.

these are purely ephemeral and unremarkable comics that are rarely ever seen outside of instagram for their lack of any exceptional or worthwhile unique elements worth passing around. they are created with a factory mindset; crank them out as quickly as possible and flood various websites with the comic equivalent of grey goo in order to amass the maximum number of clicks. their ideal audience is undiscerning and simply looking for stimuli that will not challenge them on any level. logically it follows that is work is explicitly for the largest possible audience one can acquire: the lowest common denominator. they are making work for a computer or an advertiser to enjoy. human enjoyment is secondary.

the unironic and sincere discussion of views and followers as if the numbers have ever been real was surreal. everyone was around for when facebook revealed that it had been grossly inflating its video metrics after strong-arming everyone into moving to video, causing the destruction of several indie companies and websites. you would have to be straight up delusional to think the webtoons numbers are real. like, it is genuinely hard for me to be nice about people who bark bark bark about "its where the audience is!!!!" when the worst comic you've ever read with 2 updates has 12876492375238576 views, 0 patreon followers and 8909 comments. the obviously AI generated comments by accounts with no profiles (as in, you can't click on profiles at all to confirm its even a real person commenting) are beyond the pale lol. its some emperors new clothes shit, if the emperor made his own invisible clothes and cried about how hard they toiled for nothing. and also they were emperor of synecdoche, new york

how does a reasonable adult look at this and conclude its real? isn't it an obvious fiction? its because it's mean to point out otherwise, and being mean is the worst thing you can be.

people used to bitch about how the "had to" made reels and i felt like i was going insane. superstitious nonsense about "the algorithm" spread and has incited people to tortuously warp their work to fit with advertising standards they don't see a penny of, in the hopes of finding an audience that doesn't exist. when the algorithm changes to better suit advertiser needs, they are somehow blindsided and betrayed by this, as if it has not been the M.O. of social media websites for the past 20 years. they will do it again. and again. and again. as advertising becomes less and less financially viable and more and more intrusive, public opinion is going to turn hard on the people who tied themselves to these ships.

call me a rat for fleeing, but i can't bear to entertain this stuff anymore. it's embarrassing, the idea of sacrifice in the name of a greater good (sacrifice being uhhhhh not using fail platforms lol) should not be such a shocking and radical act. it should be reflexive

[okayto]

Mini-Review: The Vampire Dies in No Time

"Invincible" vampire Draluc is...incredibly vincible, actually, turning into a pile of dust at the slightest provocation; he just revives almost immediately. When vampire hunter Ronaldo blows up Draluc's castle, the vampire decides to move in with the hunter, become a partner and metaphorically-popcorn-munching observer of all the weirdos, both human and vampire, who lurk in Shin-Yokohama.

This is another one of those shows that got me because I thought I wouldn't care about it, and then ended up enjoying myself. I came across this on Crunchyroll's 24/7 live Roku channel, looking for something to put on in the background while I did chores, and it's a good, effective show for that purpose! It came on frequently and hit that sweet spot of "entertaining to watch" and "I don't need to pay attention the whole time" that I want for background shows; eventually I realized I was enjoying it enough that I went and watched the whole series, both seasons, as my after-work dinner accompaniment.

Now, the entire reason I thought I wouldn't care? The title bugs me. I can't say that it's wrong, because Draluc sure does die in no time. (Witness:)

But there's something about the title that doesn't sound like natural English for the subject: Draluc dies all the time for virtually no reason (or every reason). It doesn't actually affect enjoyment of the show, and anyone on the English localization side of things didn't have a choice because "The Vampire Dies in No Time" is there, on screen, in English, every episode in the original Japanese version, which makes me assume it was a decision made more by people in Japan. But I wonder what localizers would've come up with to convey the same thing if they'd been given the opportunity.

Because I initially watched whatever episodes were on TV, I didn't start at the beginning, and that would be my recommendation: starting with an episode that's not the first. The first episode sets things up, true, but it's nothing you can't figure out within two minutes of the second's beginning, and because it's invested in setting everything up, it's one of the weaker episodes.

Instead, start with the second episode. Literally all you need to know is 1) Ronaldo is a vampire hunter who 2) lives with Draluc, a vampire [so clearly all vampires aren't bad] because 3) he kinda caused Draluc's castle to explode. And 4) Draluc dies a lot.

(You can watch the first episode later, like a flashback, after you've actually had a chance to decide if you like it. Because seriously, the first episode felt like it was dragging so much.)

Anyway.

It's funny, and each episode is comprised of a couple mini-sodes following a character as something happens. That might be Ronaldo having to hunt or take in a vampire, or it could be a coworker in the vampire hunter guild, or it could be John the armadillo going on a donut run, or it could be Draluc's family reunion.

It doesn't take itself seriously at all.

It's worth noting that much of the humor is going to be borderline-appropriate depending on your situation; this definitely isn't something I'd feel comfortable watching at work, for instance. Nudity and light sexuality are common topics—one vampire foe, Nudenium, is just a guy with a bunch of flowers for a groin and his bite will similarly turn people nude with flowers, because...he wants to spread groin-flowers, I guess? When he's not doing that he's pretty reasonable and friendly, as later episodes show; Micro Bikini's bite will turn people into a hypnotized horde of micro-bikini-wearers; Mr. Lewd Talk is self-explanatory. (Not all vampires are sexual, but these three show up with some frequency, to the point where they are legit secondary characters who contribute to the plot in various ways.)

(Also, it becomes clear as the series progresses that many of the vampires are just, for lack of a better term, dicking around. Sure, some want world domination. Some just want to spread weird flower-children-with-legs throughout parks. Some could be normal people except they just really, really prefer to dedicate their lives to playing strip rock-paper-scissors.)

What I enjoyed about it is how it balances humor with entertaining character stories. Nothing is going to get really deep, but you do get to know characters, and the same secondary and tertiary characters—both the good and theoretically-antagonist— come up again and again. Some of the vampires are related to each other! Some of the hunters are related to each other, or have been friends for years. Ronaldo went to high school with one of the police's vampire division guys, who's mad because his mom likes Ronaldo's blog-turned-bestseller-book about vampire hunting.

Draluc and Ronaldo make a fun pairing in an odd couple-type way. Draluc is, to Ronaldo's chagrin, a good roommate: an excellent cook, pretty clean, generally handles social situations well. Doesn't have (or need) a job, so he's available to follow along and help with vampire hunting situations (although probably a solid 50% of that is him following out of curiosity and boredom). The two are emotionally around the same level (young adults functional enough to live independently but childish enough to try and settle an argument with a dance-off).

I would also be remiss if I didn't mention Draluc's familiar, an armadillo named John. We all love John, in-universe and out. He's sweet. He can DJ. He has a fan club. He has a backstory. He is a cinnamon roll.

Verdict

English dub? Yes, only the first season (there are two seasons). It's very good matching the cadence and character of the original, and I really missed it when I watched the second season. Dub Draluc is given a stereotypical "vampire" accent and sounds pretty smooth and put-together, which goes with his high-class family background, which is context I can't get from his Japanese voice.

Visuals: Modern and fine. Nothing stood out to me, but neither did I find myself thinking about any problems.

Worth watching? Yes. It's a solid, consistently-funny comedy, pick it up if you're looking for a laugh. Don't be scared off by the often low-brow humor I mentioned; it tries to walk a fine line between jokes and going too far, and I think it generally succeeds, so it's worth at least trying. It helps that the episodes move at a brisk, but not breakneck, pace, meaning jokes usually don't overstay their welcome.

Where to watch (August 2024): Crunchyroll (sub and available dub), episodes buyable in Amazon Prime and Apple TV; first season on Blu-ray

Click my “reviews” tag below or search “mini review” on my blog to find more!

[guriyuri]

School Zone/「スクールゾーン」

🌸9/10🌸 (HIATUS)

A quirky yuri comedy about the chaotic daily life of high school girls! Yokoe and Sugiura have been together forever, and they've mastered the art of making trouble when life's a bore. High school might be a drag, but these girls in love know just how to inject a little chaos and comedy into their sloppy school life.

(Seven Seas Entertainment)

*occasionally listed as ‘School Zone Girls’

I fuckin LOVED school zone, man. There isn't a single character in it that isn't eeping out of their minds at all times. It throws almost all normal shonen/male-targeted troupes off of their kilter and is incredibly refreshing to read. One of its best qualities is its ability to maintain its identity outside of being a queer story- providing commentary on a wide range of topics relevant to high school, youth, etc. I can't really describe the effect of finally being able to read girls just being fucking stupid- other than saying its like running your brain under cold tap water, if your brain was a lesbian yuri enthusiast with a perpetual craving for full-cream milk. As silly as it may be, I actually genuinely enjoy its approach to w/w and adolescent relationship. 2 out of the 3 arguable 'main' three couples have one partner that is gender nonconforming/visibly queer, a rarity for contemporary yuri as a lot of works- to no fault of their own- fall into pitfalls of exclusively drawing hyper-feminine women to try present itself more believably or because it has no other way of proving to you that the characters are girls. The negative of this being that ostracises an entire group of people within the real-life lesbian community and disregards the instrumental role of butch lesbians in queer history by refusing them representation in a genre for them. Despite how I phrase this, though, I'm not exactly trying to present School Zone as a Magnum Opus or the pinnacle of political-correctness and singlehandedly defeating lesbophobia worldwide (which it did); I just cannot stress how badly we need diverse gender representation in yuri.

The main two girls are both fucking hilarious and strangely adorable in their own way (aside from being every gay couple to ever™). Their dynamic mostly consists of Yokoe being a combination of stupid, evil, and helplessly down bad and Kei being a single thread away from pulling a glock on her. If that can’t convince you to give szg a shot you’re a lost cause + I’m unplugging your life support. Anyways, they’re only one of the 3(ish) main pairings in the manga; but that’s where we get to the difficult part to talk about. Touched on some-what briefly, but too often to be able to ignore (iirc they have a handful of dedicated chapters), is Tsubaki’s incestuous crush on her sister Hiiragi. It’s kind of unfortunate this is in here and it sucks for me to have to mention but In this specific case I do think it’s worth overlooking for *so* many reasons. At its’ core their relationship is mostly focused on teenage adolescence and navigating complex familial relationships whilst still trying to grow up and find yourself. In isolation both Tsubaki and Hiiragi are very well written characters; on par with the rest of the cast and really are both very likeable. It’s when their relationship with eachother gets played up for fanservice is when they start to shit on your salad. Still, though, the author pretty clearly has no intention of actually writing them ending up together/Hiiragi reciprocating. So it’s highly likely Tsubaki’s character arc will lead her to move on, especially considering how she’s developed thus far. Last Couple worth discussing seriously is Fuji and Kishiya-san. While I was reading I was under the impression that Fuji + rest were high-school aged and Kishiya was in her first year at uni, but the only source I can find that lists their age says that Kishiya is a first-year high school student; which must make everybody else be in secondary school. Either way though, the age gap between them remains roughly the same and doesn’t really change my hot take on these two. Out of the entire cast Fuji is definitely the truest depiction of the experience of growing up sapphic, unknowingly. She is also my favourite :-). It was also refreshing to read about a girl who hasn’t figured it all out and is just kind of weird and off putting instead of elegant and tragic like the atmosphere of traditional yuri + made me feel weirdly heard? Call me biased, or a victim of grooming ALL you want but looking up to someone maturer, more in control, someone who feels above it all is someone you tend to gravitate towards when you’ve felt helpless and inept at understanding yourself your entire life. Much like Tsubaki and Hiiragi, Kishiya-san has yet to show any indication of reciprocating or even knowing of Fuji’s feelings and is what I think a genuinely positive influence on her. I can also imagine Kishiya-san fighting on the mental FRONTLINES to stay as patient and kind to Fuji as she is, aswell as taking the time to talk to her and treating her like a friend. Everyone please take a moment to acknowledge her service in the troubled youth industry.

There’s also Yatsude and Kaname but they’re pretty interesting so I’ll let you develop your thoughts independently on those two. They also have ZERO buisness being the most beautiful fucking women alive. The things I’d let Kaname do to me are to be repented for.

[analoghorrorexplained]

Analog Horror Review: UrbanSPOOK

[ Warning, this post will contain spoilers for the work of media mentioned in the title. This review will also contain mentions of upsetting topics such as the SA and SA of a minor. Please read at your own risk]

It has been awhile since I have made an analog horror review since, well, there have not been many series I have seen that has caught my eye. But, while I am not really “dazzled” by the newer content being put out there (minus Vita Carnis). But... despite me not really finding much of what is being released right now interesting... I found myself unable to not say anything about the series above. 

UrbanSPOOK is an analog horror series detailing the exploits of an extremely violent serial killer who leaves paintings at the scenes of his crimes. That is it. The horror from this series is actually a little different than what we are used to since instead of something paranormal or extraordinary happening all of what we are seeing happen is caused by a presumably normal (although extremely deranged) man with no other extraordinary traits. In a way, this makes urbanSPOOK more realistic than some other series. Things like this could very well happen (and probably are happening) in our real world. This is more or less the extent of the plot. Each video is set up to be a VHS recap of the crimes of this serial killer recounting in detail how this serial killer murdered these people in the most violent way they could. And in each video, the paintings left behind by this person are shown. 

I watched the entire series which was not hard to do since each video was under 5 minutes long. And I did not like what I saw.

For one, as many others have said, UrbanSPOOK does not really use the actual genre of analog horror that well. While I can tell the creator put some serious effort in those paintings along with research involving the methods of killing: the series itself is more reminiscent of a slideshow. There is no reason this could not have been any other type of horror or even just a series of twitter posts providing backstories for these paintings. These videos dont seem like PSAs since they do not state what organization they originate from or any other specifics like the dates these murders happened, approximate locations, or any other details that really give us a time or a place. With the analog format, you are supposed to be using analog formats of media to tell a story. This can take the form of a channel hijacking, old TV ads, old children's shows, PSAs, or radio broadcasts (among others). While the channel says the videos we are being shown are from supposedly “old VHS tapes”, they do not even show the old VHS grain or distortions most tapes have and, again, lack a lot of the information we already went over. There is no time frame for events other than “2 months ago” or “4 months ago” nor is there a location, or even any organizations we can trace things back to.

If this is supposed to be a PI or a family member of a victim raising awareness, why are they detailing the killings in such crippling detail when the focus should be on catching the guy doing this? If this is meant for police eyes only (which would explain the graphicness) why is there a number at the end of the video? If this was made by the killer, what would be the point in doing this when they are already leaving behind paintings at the scene? And if this is a news network: all of the above is still true but why is there no secondary voiceover? Why are they showing the paintings when those paintings do not help identify the victims and are evidence? Why are no specific locations being mentioned other than “the lighthouse” or “a mine”. At least with series like Gemini Home, Vita Carnis, Local 58, and Mandela, we have some sort of base location we get to be familiar with. We know why the story is being presented in analog format. It makes sense because the story is set in a time where that is the only format available. We have clues. This isnt giving us anything other than the phone number. And the phone number only tells us that the series takes place in Louisiana, near New Orleans, and is sometimes during of after 2001 since that's when that area code was introduced. And even then, DVDs were introduced in 1996 and surpassed the sale of tapes by 2003. This isnt to say people did not use VHS after 2001 but by 2008 everything was mostly switched over to the DVD format. 

My point is: the story does not make a lot of sense in the format it is. Either the creator is having this take place in the early 2000s which... I guess can work but then begs the question of the phone number. But if its before then: the phone number itself is a massive continuity error. 

That is not the only issue I have with the series though.

Sexual assault, themes of genital mutilation, and pedophilia are also pretty common or at least are openly displayed in the series. Grant it, these are traits the killer is shown to possess. These are not things being inherently endorsed or promoted. However, what I do take issue with is the fact that the series lingers a little bit too long on describing these acts and the violence that results from them and not really much else. While the series creator has stated multiple times on now-deleted tweets that he does not view himself as “having limits” in regards to his series and makes this mostly for shock value: I do not think this should excuse just how haphazardly the subject of SA is handled. Almost every episode of the series has something that is either blatantly rape or can be interpreted as a form of rape somewhere in the episode. And a lot of these scenes also involve children, mutilation, or the abuse of animals as well. This is in almost EVERY SINGLE EPISODE. And once again, these are all described in sickening detail. 

Other than being “gross and disturbing” it serves no narrative purpose just like it being on a VHS doesn't. If this was supposed to make us hate the villain: we already have gotten to that point I think. If anything, we have gone well past it. But what also bothers me is that these themes also pop up in the creator's other work. This same issue is a near-constant thing with the other work they put out. I am not accusing the creator of anything, lets be clear on that, but it is not a good look to admit you make content for shock value, have SA be a main theme in your work, and then make a lot of art also about SA and the SA of kids while also selling the painting your in-world serial killer made of a SAed murdered child as merch. 

If you want to address some dark real-world subjects, do that, other places have (for example the SCP foundation or Mandela). But doing that and describing the most graphic rape scene you can think of are not the same thing. Not only is it lazy, it just makes your series into torture porn. It serves little purpose. And when that is a majority of what you talk about: I am inclined to think you have more of a darker connection with that topic beyond using it to simply advance your art. Again, this is not an accusation, just an observation from what is public. 

Overall, between the fact this series fails to really live up to what “analog horror” actually is and lacks any story beyond “here is this guy, he kills people in really violent ways, he leaves paintings behind, and did I mention he does fucked up stuff with their genitals” and it does not progress beyond that. It is edge-fodder without a coherent story or point for existing beyond being disturbing. The only thing that makes this series interesting is the fact its a person doing this and not a monster but after recent episodes even that is questionable. The fact that a teenager who spends a little bit too much time on Liveleak could have written this tells me its not worth following further. The horror here is the fact that something this seemingly loved by other people is this terrible in terms of execution and its ability to convey a point other than “look, a mangled human body I may or may not have SAed, be afraid”. 

Over all I give this a “For the love of god try harder, and no not in that way/10″. While the art is well made, I have no idea why this series gets praise when it fumbles this badly at everything it tries to do. This could have been so good, why is it so bad?

And analog horror community, get better standards if this is the “new standard” of the genre. This is laughable. 

[actualbird]

now i'm kinda curious actually... do you think when luke got his illness and all, do you think nsb would've let him retire then and there, or is luke just so good of an agent that they couldn't let them go? cause i can sort imagine nsb going like: "hey luke, we can let you off. we'll handle treatment and all. but please live a normal life" but then luke rejecting that offer because he'd still want be useful in some way... HUUUUU

THIS IS A FUN QUESTIONS CUZ LIKE.....i have several different views on how it could go

but before i go into this i wanna make it clear that like, i do Not think that nsb lets or even Wants luke to retire at his current age. illness aside, hes 24 and at his prime in terms of the rest of his health and his skills, AND in canon we see the nsb as still actively giving luke orders and missions (heck, the nsb is the entire reason luke is in the nxx investigation team at all, hes there on nsb orders and im never forgetting that because what a delightful chekov's gun; the only member of the team who has a completely different organization as another power to listen to)

SO all these views on how the nsb lets him go to stellis is less of the nsb allowing a retirement, and more of the nsb allowing a location reassignment. since that seems to fit better with what we see in canon.

plus, in canon, it's already mentioned that the Main Reason luke moved back to stellis was because of the nsb order to join the nxx team, with the secondary reason that luke was aligned with this because this would let him investigate the drug's origin

SO all these views additionally are more talking about like.....more factors to help sway that decision In Addition to the canon factors

so my three views on how this goes is

1 ) they really just let him go/allowed his reassignment when he asked because hes just that good

this is the premise i use the MOST in my fics: in my aaron & luke NSB days fic "excuse me, sir, i am this agent's emotional support babysitter" and what i vaguely imply in the flashbacks of my one lukerosa fic "but little do we know, the stars welcome him with open arms" and the reason is cuz.......personal agency is a great narrative tool and theme

in both those fics, i was basically trying to highlight that luke's biggest enemy and thing that is dragging him down and making things hard for himself is, honestly, himself.

so how it goes in this view of "the nsb letting him go back to stellis" is that luke just has to ask. here's an excerpt from the aaron & luke fic (which, for context, is set before luke gets his illness):

It’s a sensitive topic, he’s come to learn. Luke's reactions swing between being vaguely hopeful to extremely volatile, when Aaron brings this up. “This” being how he thinks Luke should go home, go back to this certain someone he mentions sometimes, someone he seems to really care about. Like high tide and low tide, some days are manageable and other days drown Luke completely. On the good days, Luke stops the conversation and says that he’ll think about it. On the bad days… “I wonder what music she likes now,” Luke mumbles pensively. “You should ask her,” Aaron takes a chance. “When you get back to her.” Because all it’ll take is Luke making the decision. If the mighty Agent Raven appeals for a reassignment to Stellis, Aaron is pretty sure he’ll get it without question. He’s too valuable to piss off with bureaucracy, so all the kid has to do is want to go back. It’s simple. Luke doesn’t think it’s simple, though, and he goes quiet for a few seconds.

and there we have it, this bit in a fic i wrote in 2022 explains view number 1. i dont think the nsb willingly wants to lose agent raven in their main location of operations, but agent raven is too valuable to disagree with.

good thing he never makes any demands, not even the most human demand of wanting to go home.

this premise is a favorite of mine to lean back on in stories since it frames luke's self loathing and guilt as the main factor holding him back from joy. it highlights the unhealthiness of luke's mental state and the sheer consequences it causes. all that was between him and reuniting with his childhood best friend was a request, such a tiny thing that people know would get approved, but he himself wouldnt let him take that chance for a long time.

2 ) they let him go because hes just that good + his illness softened the way because he became less of an asset thanks to his time limit

view number 2 is basically view number 1 but with the nsb being much slimier (which still leads to the good effect of letting luke go back home) but BASICALY here: they REALLY dont want luke to leave the main location of operation, but hes too valuable to piss off and oofsies okay his illness now technically means he isnt at his prime.

their best agent has a time limit now, and thats kinda a bummer from a govt organization standpoint

this view is less "luke go forth and live a better life with the years u still have!" and more of the much unkinder "dang our favorite weapon is breaking :/ and hes not as perfect anymore because of that :/ fine fiiiine go home or whatever if you wanna and be productive to relevant cases there, you might as well"

basically view number 2 is view number 1 but now with more....systemic ableism //cringe emoji

but this is the premise that is the "most canon" in my head, even if i dont use it in fic as much. simply because it takes stock of both of luke's main issues (his horrible mental health and his deterioriating physical health) AND cuz....well....i know the nsb has been mostly shown as neutral-to-benevolent force in canon so far, but can ya blame me for not trusting the shady government organization? HAHA. ableism is definitely the kind of crummy that cld thrive in an environment like that

but speaking of horrid things...

3 ) they let him go because his reassignment to stellis and his illness perfectly coincided with the rise of the NXX Team and i fully think that the nsb has something to do with the nxx drug

AND NOW WE SWERVE INTO SOME BIG BAD GUY SHIT!!

some canon facts:

luke's illness was caused by an nxx contamination of the medicine used to treat him after a Disastrous Mission

that Disastrous Mission was an nsb mission that killed all his colleagues EXCEPT him

luke joining the nxx investigation team in 2030 was due to the nsb giving him orders to do so

some questions i have now about those canon facts

how did luke's medicine become contaminated with nxx?? i assume he was being treated by the nsb in an nsb facility, the security would be tight. how the heck did the nxx drug get past that.

how the heck did the nxx drug get past all that and get to luke specifically? luke who is now a very specific person because he was the only one to survive that mission. lethal drug contamination to only survivor sounds VERY MUCH like foul play was involved, doncha think?

sure, luke's assignment to the nxx team couldve been because it was convenient, they had their best agent there already with worthwhile personal stakes in the nxx drug. but....that seems TOO CONVENIENT, DONCHA THINK???

what im saying here is that i think the nsb definitely was setting this up. either they set up the mission and/or set up the contamination to get agent raven into the nxx team. why? idk yet. but again, i dont trust mysterious govt agencies HAHA, so thats my 3rd view

so...as u can see, all my views dont really posit the nsb as the good guys JHVSKJHFVDKSJ. at most, they can be the Meh guys, but whether or not they have Something to do with the broader nxx drug plot, it IS canon that like...

luke got caught up in an operation with them when he was 16-17 years old, and that led to him joining and led to them getting their most skilled agent

so how much of that was coincidence? and even if it was a coincidence, how much of "letting a teenager into a cutthroat govt organization before he's even legal" is ethical? if the nsb cld allow that, then their broader views of the value of Human Beings seems uh shallow, to say the least. and luke took to that kind of environment like he was meant for it, because even before the nsb and before his illness, he already had a deep desire to be useful, to not be a burden, to protect the people he loves and people who cannot protect themselves.

luke was a martyr in the making honored to take up the mantle. he was perfect for the nsb. way, way too perfect.

i dont think the nsb would let go of somebody like that without good reason, without strings attached, or without the "letting go" not actually being the freedom luke and the rest of us thinks it is

thanks for the ask :D

[demystifiedstardust]

Researching Constelic

Cw subjective opinions.

⚠️ This is intended to be an analysis of what I've been able to dig up concerning the topic of constelic identity, and how it exclusively applies to myself. I have no intention of invalidating anyone's constelic experience. This piece contains both positive and negative opinions on stelling exclusively as a framework, and is not meant as commentary on people who use constelic terminology for themselves. Still, I understand that a person very attached to stelling may take this analysis personally when no offense is meant. Use your best judgment on if this piece is appropriate for you. ⚠️

While searching for fresh ideas, I stumbled upon the constelic community. It seemed promising at a glance, except for an important detail...

...is there a community?

I can find lots of flag and coining blogs, but actual constels are nowhere to be seen. I can't find anyone talking about the experience of stelling at the time of this writing, save for an anonymous submission blog (and during my research, I hit the bottom of #actually constelic, wow).

Well, that and... from what scant information I can find about the subculture to begin with, it seems less about experience to begin with, and more about label hoarding.

I'd like to say right now that there's nothing inherently Wrong or Bad about hoarding labels. Some people find meaning in doing so. That being said, I am not one of those people. Label hoarding isn't what I'm looking for in a potential identity-centric community.

Hoarding constels feels like... the aesthetic of an identity, without actually exploring an identity? I don't see the appeal of not engaging with your own identity. I wouldn't have made this blog at all if I didn't feel strongly about that. I don't have a desire to curate and grow a list for the sake of keeping a list. While there's nothing inherently wrong with aesthetics either, for me, the list is secondary to the experience itself.

This aestheticization of identity permeates the various terminologies under the constelic umbrella. Orbiting, veiling, constel(ation)s, phases. Why is the core terminology celestial-body-based? Is there a reason, other than aesthetic? Everything not immediately celestial-based is a rebrand of existing kin words, right down to stellie as an alternative to kinnie. Why is all this hyperspecific vocabulary necessary for a concept that has yet to be adopted by a core base of users, if not for aesthetic?

The end result is something that feels derivative of kin, without the organic community and subcultural development of kin. I think it was meant to be a more inclusive alternative to kin, but in its current state it feels forced. That there are posts in the tags at all indicates an amount of success, but it still feels like a sterile environment, like the internet version of a staged home that's never meant to be actually lived in. The lack of discoverable experiences compounds this feeling. It's unfortunate, because there are aspects within the framework of stelling that deserve to be explored.

The lack of separation between "identify as" and "identity with" is the most attractive feature of stelling in my humble opinion, as these two concepts can become fuzzy and fluid between each other. This is something I experience with my relationship to vampires and deep water. I oscillate between both modalities, and while the oscillation itself causes me no discomfort, there isn't much in the way of community that can accommodate a fluid state of being such as my own.

This lack of distinction serves as both an affirmation of freedom of identity fluidity within the label, as well as an anti-gatekeeping measure. I also like the affirmation that a constel can be obtained and dropped at any point in a person's life, contrary to the heavy insinuation in kin spaces that identity is permanent and inherent. It theoretically creates an environment with comparatively less expectations and more wiggle room to parse out an identity without fear of mistakes.

The constelic symbol is also really logographic! I can't say the same about some other logos in the same vein, like the fic//tionkin keys symbol. Perhaps as expected from a framework heavily concerned with aesthetic, but it still should be noticed and appreciated. I'm a sucker for good graphic design. One more thing I like is the color scheme on the basic constellic flag. I hope the creator is proud of themselves, because they did a great job.

So as a concept, there are many things I really like about the constelic framework of identity. Unfortunately, the hoarding aspect of constels is incompatible with what I desire for myself. I want to understand the different aspects myself--how they influence me on a granular level, how they influence each other, how they paint the picture of "me". I want to play with my identity, and I want to be serious with my identity. Above all, I want to engage with my identity. This creates a conceptual disconnect between me and stelling.

In practice, the constelic community is barren and unpopulated. There's nothing of substance--no connections between other people, no posts to read except endless coinings that may or may not have a practical use. It's disappointing but not surprising, given the constelic framework's leaning toward identity hoarding and not engaging.

Ultimately, I don't have a use for stelling in my life, aside from comparing and contrasting it to my ideals. My march continues onward, but this was an interesting pitstop.

[shirayuki7]

Ok your tags on the reblog were very cool, would love to hear more about this project. Also, this is entire based on vibes of just existing in or near PA and having incredibly revisionist (and religious) history books, yeah. Sounds right.

Yeppppp! Get ready for a long answer cause i am in the thick of it! I'm pretty much a complete outsider to this topic. USA history doesn't interest me as much as ancient history does. The whole theme of the project is religious in/tolerance, and I picked Pennsylvania because my in-laws are all in Pittsburgh and I thought getting to know the state more would be fun! I've already got a pretty good background in religious history, so most of my research has been contextual colonial history. But the primary source I'm basing my project on is AWESOME. It's "Gottlieb Mittelberger's Journey to Pennsylvania" (free in the Library of Congress btw) and it's just so full of amazing information about colonial PA and how it was viewed by outsiders at the time (for Gottlieb, it was pretty godless and not worth the hype despite how beautiful the country is. He lived in Lancester county for about 4 years before returning to Germany).

The basis of my research is that in Europe, most Protestant sectarians (Quakers in particular) were seen as anti-state/anti-authoritarian. Being a dissenter was the same as being a treasonous terrorist because religion was the basis for most if not all laws and public policy within a country. So dissenters like William Penn were heavily discriminated against based on their beliefs and punished by the state as tho they were public enemies number one (spiritual danger = real danger). So quite frankly, because the America's were the place for criminals to be sent anyway, it kinda made sense to let dissenters leave and rotten themselves and their communities else where. So William Penn gets permission from his buddy King James 2 to create Pennsylvania as a "holy experiment" for liberty of conscience (and Quakers) to go. Penn advertises in England and Germany for the most part about this land of religious freedom and opportunity. With a little censure from the crown about how he sets up the colony, Penn makes it law that people can believe what they want and therefore worship and do what they want (within reason). From the outset of the colony, we have a very diverse environment full of very diverse people. No single people's settled PA, despite Quakers being a majority for a time and even when they weren't the majority they still held most of the power in the colony.

Anyway, all the secondary literature I've read all say the same thing: Penn's holy experiment was a success. Religious tolerance helped make PA economically and politically successful and set up all the American colonies for an equally successful revolution. But I've noticed that they're all ignoring, or just plain forget because 'MURICA, that the colonies were not completely separate entities from their parent country and are enabling the narrative of usa supremacy and individualism that DID NOT EXIST at the time. Individualism sure as hell did exist, but not in the sense of "im an american." It was "I'm an English Quaker" or "I'm a German Lutheran" or other ethnic or religious identification. These historians make it sound like everyone thinks PA was a great thing... but here we have over 100 pages of a German immigrant's travelog that heavily criticizes Penn's colony, telling his fellow Germans that it's just not worth the risk and they're better off at home. Obviously there's a ton more nuance to the account than I'm giving here, but the whole book is him saying "here's this bad thing, here's this good thing but here's the dark side of the good thing that isn't immediately obvious but I will explain it to you for your own good, and here's another bad thing." Most of the negativity he gives about PA in particular is religiously based: anarchy and atheism (exaggerations, but it was how he saw it as a faithful Lutheran). He tells stories of women running the show (heaven forbid!) And how the courts and laws are so lax that everybody does what they want even if theyre sued! These are seen as bad things to him, but obviously to a modern person (and to many a modern Pennsylvanian) it sounds like libertarian paradise. The idea of "success" is what I'm challenging with the Gottlieb account; we as historians are always needed to challenge the narrative. Complicate the story. The 13 colonies as a melting pot and overall success story is a good story and we use it to reinforce murican values in our public schools (something i greatly disagree with but it is what it is). But it's not the whole story and never will be. We've got the puritans in New England doing their thing and the Quakers in PA doing theirs, but what did that actually mean to people at the time? Did they see it as success? I should probably stop now haha! This is getting long. Thanks for asking about my project, it helps me articulate it for my prospectus due in a few days. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[saezurufeels]

Unpopular opinion: I like the idea of Doumeki having a girlfriend. It would comfort me to think that at some point in these four years he at least tried to move on from Yashiro.

I'm not some Yashiro hater or something like that. He's my favorite character and of course I want them to be together. We all know why he acted the way he did, and I'm not the one to judge if he was right or wrong. It's just... Seeing things from Doumeki's perspective makes me so sad. He was deeply hurt and thrown away, and after their re-encounter it seems to me that they woudn't even talk to each other if it wasn't for Doumeki finding excuses to go after Yashiro (like that scene in the bathroom).

I want so bad to see some reaction from Yashiro, you know, like when he dragged Doumeki to the elevator. I want him to show Doumeki at least a little bit of how much he still cares for him. I think D deserves Yashiro being a little jealous, he deserves Y going after him.

Anyway, I know saezuru is not some high school drama and the characters are not moved by such childish motivations, but I'd like to see more of Yashiro making the first move.

Of course, your opinion is valid and important. It’s hard not to sympathize with Doumeki and his heartbreak, so I understand. When I remember Doumeki’s reaction after Nanahara told him that Yashiro doesn’t remember him, I get emotional; Doumeki’s total devastation was hard to watch. For the first time ever, I thought he looked so vulnerable and defenseless, like you could just knock him over with a touch.

However, I’m also very careful about how I interpret the situation. I know these aren’t your words, but sometimes I get asks that subtly try to pin the blame on Yashiro (which I don’t publish for obvious reasons. If one wants to discuss that topic seriously, the least one could do is come off anon). I say this often, and I’ll continue to say it: Yashiro doesn’t owe Doumeki anything. And vice versa. Yashiro doesn’t owe his body and soul to Doumeki. The only thing Yashiro owes Doumeki, which is the same thing any person owes another, is basic human dignity and respect. Yashiro has always given Doumeki his freedom and a choice; he’s never demanded more of him than he was capable of. Yashiro never acted like he was entitled to Doumeki. And, not to draw comparisons, but that’s a big difference between their problems. One’s loss comes from not getting their preferred person, the other from not getting the freedom of choice. After all, loosing a love interest is less devastating than loosing yourself. And “loosing himself” is exactly how Yashiro described accepting Doumeki into his heart.

Therefore, first and foremost, I care about Yashiro’s wellbeing. The most pressing issue here, the issue that this whole manga is commenting on, is the issue of trauma and autonomy. This is Yashiro’s journey to loving himself, AND THEN being able to love someone else. Doumeki’s journey comes secondary, because you can’t force someone to love you— they have to choose to do that. One always comes before two. Right now, we are watching Yashiro decide if and how to accept Doumeki into his heart. The rest will follow.

I hope that makes sense. I’m not saying that I don’t understand, or feel sorry for Doumeki’s loss, I’m just saying that we need to carefully consider how we frame this situation. Yes, Doumeki is suffering because he can’t be with Yashiro, but Yashiro is also suffering immensely: he’s miserable because he can’t have the love of his life- the only person that’s ever cared for him,- and he’s tormented because he can’t bring himself to accept love the way most people can accept good things. Whichever choice Yashiro makes will cause him anguish. If he doesn’t address those core issues first, even Doumeki can’t save him. He’ll always have problems with his low self-worth and consequently, in his relationships with romantic partners.

And again, I know this wasn’t what you were insinuating, but I just wanted to clarify in case this gets misinterpreted. It might not always be obvious, but you can sympathize with one character and still understand that their happiness isn’t the most important factor if it comes at the expense of another person. What Yashiro needs is someone to say, “hey, I understand why you did what you did, and I forgive you.” And the same goes for Doumeki. His actions toward Yashiro weren’t malicious, but they were still harmful. So although I can sympathize with Doumeki the way you do, because he’s had a difficult life and doesn’t mean any harm in his pursuit of Yashrio, it doesn’t mean that he didn’t cause any harm. But Yashiro must be allowed to choose if he wants to let go of the past, and have a romantic relationship with Doumeki.

Even though Doumeki's love and persistence helped Yashiro move through his healing, it was never a one-sided relationship. Yashiro also helped Doumeki with his personal issues. Yashiro should get more credit for the love and support he's given to Doumeki. There's only so much one person can do at a time, and Yashiro needs more time and patience than other people.

And just like Yashiro has a choice, so does Doumeki. No one is holding a gun to his head and telling him to pursue Yashrio. If he feels like Yashiro isn’t reciprocating his feelings, he has the choice to leave. What isn’t a solution is getting impatient with Yashrio and expecting him to fast-track his healing journey and simply get over his trauma, so that Doumeki doesn’t have to wait anymore. In many ways, I can make the argument that Doumeki is being too persistent— but I usually don’t, because I can sympathize with him, and I can objectively see how he's helped Yashiro in a lot of ways despite also causing some harm. I wish some people would sympathize more with Yashiro. I’m not saying you specifically, just in general.

All of that being said, we’re at a point in the story where Yashiro has recognized that he chooses Doumeki. The obstacle, or the next phase of his healing journey is finding a way to express those feelings. It’s difficult for him, because he’s always been rejected when he’s pursued romantic interests, and even his own parents have rejected him. Yashiro has to find a way to overcome this crushing fear, and find an appropriate way of expressing his emotions. So, what I’m trying to say is, Yashiro is in fact pursing Doumeki. It’s hard to see his pursuit, because it’s clumsy and at times immature (and to be completely fair, Doumeki isn't being completely forthcoming with his feelings either), but it’s there, and YK is doing a brilliant job of portraying it in a dynamic, realistic, and complicated character such as Yashiro. I honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. Like you said, this is not a high school drama. It’s as close to reality as you can get, and reality is nuanced and frustrating.

Sorry, this is getting long, but last thing I want to say is that Doumeki did have an eventful life in the last four years. I think that’s why he’s a changed person. He’s had lots of joys, including his friendship with Niki, his Aoi redemption; he’s found a place in society where he feels comfortable and accepted; and the more I think about it, the more it seems like the bar matron is not just his informant, but also his friend. Doumeki’s formed many new relationships and goals that likely gave him purpose and joy. And now, Yashiro isn’t the only thing in his life he aspires to keep close.

Thanks for sending this, I appreciate your honest opinion. This was a good opportunity to talk about these issues that keep coming up, so I hope you don’t mind that I rambled a bit.

[asongofstarkandtargaryen]

I don't know if you're into pokemon but what types would asoiaf characters be

Starks - Ice type

Ned - Ice

Cat - Water/Ice cause she's also a tully who are water types cause rivers

Robb - Ice/Fighting cause military intellect

Jon - Ice/Fire for obvious reasons

Sansa - Ice/Steel porcelain to ivory to steel

Arya - Ice/Poison cause Faceless men are teaching her about poisons

Bran - Ice/Flying you will never walk again but you will fly

Rickon - Ice/Dark cause shaggydog has black fur

Daenerys - Fire/Dragon once again for obvious reasons

Lannisters - Rock types

Tyrells - Grass types

Arryns -Flying types

Martells - Poison types

Pokemon and Asoiaf!! Such an interesting topic to speculate about.

Ok, I can also see Starks being the Ice types.

Ned Stark: Ice ,pure ice. I nominate Glalie as his pokemon because I love the legend that says that Glalie was born from a boulder that has absorbed the distress and regrets from any mountaineers that got lost on icy mountains.

Catelyn Stark: Water and Ice combination (because she associates with both House Tully and Stark). My pokemon pick for her is Dewgong, which is a great swimmer and also can camouflage itself on the snow. Great for the enviroment Catelyn lives!

Robb: Ice primarly, I can see steel being secondary trait. However, the pokemon I picked is only ice type (and ice/ground ). I chose Avalugg for him because its frozen body is hard as steel and can crush anything that comes his way. Similar, with how Robb was unstoppable on the battlefield.

Jon: So many possibilities for Jon. He could be an ice or fire or dragon or ghost or any combination. In the end I went for fighting/ghost because I think he would make a fine Marshadow. This one hides in the shadow and observes the scene before attacking. Also they can understand their opponents and use that to their advantage (like Jon who is very observant)

Sansa: I don't disagree with her being an Ice type(bc of House Stark) but I wanted to go for a fairy type. And I think she could be the famous Jigglypuff who captivates their opponents with their innocent appearance before they put them to sleep.

Arya: Ice/poison or pure ice are both good. I chose Glaceon for her, because it throws needle like iciclets to its enemies. Plus, small and cute like Arya.

Bran: Ice and flying. Articuno is the pokemon that I would pick for him. It's a rare one and according to legend appears before doomed travelers lost in icy regions and even aids them to go back to safety.

Rickon: Once again I agree with you about Dark and Ice. I'd pick Chien-Pao, that cute pokemon who accidentally cause avalances while he just want to play.

Daenerys: fire and dragon. My choice for her is Reshiram which according to mythology  is said to burn down kingdoms of people who ignore truth due to being consumed by greed. A second choice is Rapidash (fire type) which is also very beautiful and is known for being brave and prideful.

Lannisters - Rock/Ground types

Tyrells - Grass/Bug types

Arryns -Flying types

Martells - Poison types

Greyjoy- Water/fighting/steel types

[ejenvs3000semesterf23]

Blog 3

Privilege is something that can stretch across multiple disciplines and cause a series of events to unfold leading to more opportunities. My working definition of privilege is of someone with more opportunity and possibility than others. This means that some people are more fortunate than others and have access to more things in life. These opportunities and possibilities are not inert and can be due to things like having wealthy parents, being born white, or being raised speaking English. 

When interpreting nature, the privilege someone possesses can drastically change how they do so. To truly interpret nature, someone needs to have a good education to understand the underlying processes of nature. This may sound like something that is ubiquitous but not everyone receives a good education or one at all. Education is important because many of us learn the natural processes through schooling such as the water cycle or how mountains are formed. In some countries, people can be so poor they do not have enough money for their kids to attend school where the children would learn about important topics like ecology. Beyond that, it is very important that kids learn what state the climate is in and how nature differs around the world. Postsecondary school is also a luxury to be able to attend. The only reason I am making this blog post is because I was fortunate enough to have the money for university. Even fewer people are able to attend post-secondary education than in grade school. These are important processes to understand as a nature interpreter.

Accessibility can also be a factor in how someone interprets nature. Having the privilege of being mobile allows someone to actually go out and view nature as much as they want. People with reduced mobility or someone who requires a wheelchair for movement do not have the liberty of experiencing off-road nature. They do not get to experience the soil with their own very feet like the rest of us can, and this would affect the way they see the world. This privilege also extends to people who live in a highly urbanized area that is far from any large section of nature. Many people nowadays live in large cities that are devoid of wildlife and so people do not have quick access to nature.

I think one's upbringing plays a big role in how one connects with nature. The way we are raised changes our perception of nature in terms of importance. Many families deeply value things like camping or going for walks in the wilderness. Other families spend most of their time indoors and so they do not establish a strong connection to nature. The family someone is born into is completely out of their control but can change their relationship with nature. 

[lordsovorn]

Some thoughts about Cyberpunk: Edgerunners

Finally watched Cyberpunk: Edgerunners.

And, not mentioning how good it is and the four (4) tears it got out of me.... While re-listening to its music in an act of sheer emotional masochism, I've stumbled on a bunch of youtube comments that inspired this little text / big ass shitpost.

So, if you're a cave person like me, before you proceed any further:

///SPOILERS FOR CYBERPUNK: EDGERUNNERS///

... not to mention very little of the following will make any sense if haven't watched it already.

...

There's actually two and a half separate topics this neon-lit wonder made me want to talk about, but today I'll only give attention to the first 1,5.

There were two types of comments that grabbed my attention - the first being "he sacrificed everything for her".

While it's undoubtedly true, romantic and tragic, they seem to miss an even more tragic aspect to David's final actions - he also sacrificed everything *she* had.

Lucy's dream of visiting the Moon is clearly stated and David certainly clings to this one true thing he understands about her, but as the anime progresses it seems to become only secondary. She doesn't even *do* anything for that Moon, but guess what she *does* things for?..

David.

She sacrifices the well-being and jobs of her friends, her own fragile stability and relative safety, she kills people and risks EVERYTHING for one thing only - to preserve the one personal connection she has in this heartless world, the only person naive and altruistic enough for her to safely trust and rely on. For David.

Being so lonely and so scared of trusting, she barely even admits to herself she cares THAT much.

"My Man, My Moon"

...

When Lucy asks Falco to turn back, he says it would mean David have died in vain. Ironically, his very sacrifice has already made all *her* sacrifices, all her efforts, vain.

Yet she concedes. One person's sacrifices rendered vain is better than two, maybe?..

Accepting such a self-sacrifice from your loved one, from the one person you wanted to save and preserve above everything else, is tragic. And probably even harder than the self-sacrifice itself.

---

Another type of comment of note - "if only they held back on chrome..."

Any tragic narrative inadvertently elicits "if only..."

It is natural to search for reasons in tragedy, for a lesson that would save you from such a fate - yet sometimes, there just isn't a simple "if only"

While cyberpsychosis is one of, if not the most obvious cause of personal suffering in Edgerunners, it is but a last piece of the domino.

The corporations wouldn't have backed down if Maine or David used less implants.

David, whose absent-minded childhood was shattered along with his sole meaning in life, his mother's dream - wouldn't have become a self-conscious, mature person with a clear understanding of what HE wants in this world, just because of using less implants.

Lucy, groomed to be a sophisticated tool, without a human past or a any human connection, alone and permanently on the run from those who would take away her very personhood - wouldn't have suddenly grown past her trust issues in the cold, bright, apathetic and greedy Night City, just because of David using less implants.

...

That is to say, "if only" doesn't lie merely in the chrome. "If only" lies in understanding yourself, in finding people to trust, in not playing games you can never hope to win, in listening to those who ~know~ how this game can screw up people.

"This game" is not merely about cyber-implants - it is the vicious climb "to the top" over corpses of the weak, the idea that you *can* get what you're worth, the hope to achieve a better future above all the violence, poverty and misery if you just try hard enough, be fast enough, smart enough.

But the house always wins, and the only way for a person to win is to stop playing and run for their lives.

But if there's no meaning in your life. No hope for a better future. If you're tired, and empty, and surrounded by pain, and threatened to lose what little you have, and the clock is ticking...

Why run. Why not burn through it all now. Brightly revel in your own self-destruction, saying to yourself that you're doing it *for something*. For a future, for wealth or power, because that's how it is, because you genuinely enjoy it... Or for someone.

The End.