#rereading it made me wanna draw her. . .

[tatck]

Lady Redfur didn't drown!!! ! ! 🎉 back to plundering and pillaging she goes

[fictitiousmagines]

You've Already Got Me Wrapped Around Your Finger Part 4

You couldn't imagine my delight, when you invited me to a mid-day picnic after you poured your heart out to me in the stacks at Mooney's. I'd wanted to kiss you, so desperately, but heroes wait for their moment.

And you are a vision here in this bustling park, the pale blue sun dress and the same ole tote that you sling over your shoulder. You are a vision. You're effortless, in a way that people try to emulate but never quite measure up to.

You blush and babble as you unpack a spread of cheese, crackers and fruit. As you unpack, your most prized possession tumbles from the depths of your tote: your journal. You've mentioned in passing, that you draw and write in there and its the only time you feel like you can be yourself. I am Captain Ahab and your journal is my white whale.

"Oops," Y/N says while quickly stuffing it back in. Its a deep green with tattered corners but she touches it with such tenderness.

I hope you can be yourself with me, Y/N. I hope you can tell that I'm here to save you. I'm here to take care of you.

It was an absolutely perfect day: the picnic, the train back to our little part of New York City, the leisurely ride home, kissing you on your porch.

Your lips were so soft, Y/N. They're almost a drug. The way I got lost in the moment and buried my hands into your soft hair. Pulling away, you looked up at me with a look that only can be described as vulnerable. Beautiful. I wanted to take you right there. But instead I stroked your cheek with my thumb and reassured you that I had a wonderful time. That I couldn't wait to see you again.

When you texted me later that night, you pulled me out of my reading. But you are always a welcome distraction.

"Thanks again for the beautiful day together. Wanna grab a drink later this week? PS. I lost my journal, maybe on the train? I'm bummed! Does Mooney's sell blank journals?"

I don't answer because I immediately plan on buying you one and bringing it to you in the morning. A nice one. And each time you pour your soul into its pages, you'll think of me.

It was irresistible grabbing it out of your bag on the train. Your attention was on the loud commotion to your right. In an instant, it went from your bag, to my backpack. Hidden under the picnic blanket.

Maybe I'll buy you a new bag, one with a zipper. I don't want anyone pickpocketing you. Anyone could grab your wallet and get your personal information. I just wanna keep you safe. Not everyone is going to have your best intentions at heart. But I do.

I've been worried about you, Y/N. This is just my way of checking on you. I'm sure you're worried about overloading me. About having too much baggage, but you could never be too much for me. The more I read, the more fascinated I became.

I learned from your journal, new things but also things I only suspected. Like, that your dads care overwhelms you sometimes. Even though you love your dad dearly. That you worry that it might be time to put him in a home, even though your heart couldn't bear it. That your brother resists helping you, even though you work round the clock. That you miss your mother. And rereading The Outsiders makes you feel more connected to her.

Your art is always so gestural. So much feeling.

My heart stopped when I saw that you even wrote about me.

You wrote about meeting me at the shop. Our coffee together. And even about eating bodega sandwiches in the stacks of Mooney's. How I made you feel safe at that moment.

"I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I think I like this guy Joe."

[poppurini]

here’s a twst writers appreciation post bc i suddenly wanna show love and i totally encourage you to reblog and put your favs here too!! doesn’t matter if they’re already mentioned or if they’re a well known writer bc compliments are never too much <3

@rggie ┊ although their blog’s not active anymore i still recommend checking them out bc their smaus are so so funny they had me HOLLERING. and they don’t just have smaus their writing is also such a good read??? I LOVE THEM SMM

@fukashiin ┊ MY SOULMATE. ok listen listen i’m telling you when she posts i run and i mean RUN to read them bc they are gold. i check her blog sm tumblr tells me WAKE UP BABE YOUR WIFE POSTED i kid u not. her works are all so good especially the fluff ones??? she just has this way with words that i can’t help but get all giddy

@keedas ┊ whenever i read their works my hand’s always ALWAYS covering my mouth due to how cute and heart pounding they are!! i still reread some of your works like lipstick stain with leona and ballroom dancing with rook i want them tattooed to my heart

@leonaism ┊ [ *do note that this blog contains nsfw works as well !! make sure u check their byf/dni before doing anything 🫶 ] WHERE DO I EVEN START. another one with an immaculate theme and also!! salmon blesses many many fandoms with their awe-struck writing, i especially love their sfw ones!! it’s so fluffy and cute rah

@hisui-dreamer ┊ another amazing writer with lots of lots of content <3 unfortunately i haven’t had the time to properly sit down and read her works but i’ve skimmed through them whenever they pop up on my dash bc oh how could i resist and i just know i’ll gobble them up they already look so good sO IMAGINE IF I HAD THE TIME TO PROPERLY READ???? I HAVE SO MANY SAVED AS TBR

@flmer ┊ one of the ppl who has the most gorgeous and creative themes my jaw dropped to the molten core of earth when i first came across their blog it was so so eye-catching!! i haven’t had the time to read their other writings but this one fluff of theirs that i read already makes me the most impatient person on earth bc i can’t wait till i have the time to properly sit down and ABSORB

@wolken-himmel ┊ her works are always so so good !! i love how she could write for all the characters and the precision with their characterisation is so on point. anytime i need a good fluffy read i always go to her, and there’s always a read for each person bc she literally writes for ALL the characters including the staff! her platonic works are just as sweet and fun as the others. such a dedicated and creative writer!!

@mxzenpai ┊ oh my god i swear the ecstasy i got when i first read their leona oneshots were incomparable. was literally kicking my feet and giggling throughout my time reading it. i had to stop and do a silent scream bc the way they wrote leona in this made me blush HARD i was rereading that for days

@nthee ┊ extremely underrated !! deserves more recognition with her content and i always get excited whenever she posts i really look forward to read them <3

dark content creators

@kurimiaki ┊ SLAMS FOLDERS ON TABLE there’s so much i could say abt their writing each and every one is so wonderfully and beautifully written i find myself admiring their writing while reading their works RAH

@pomupom ┊ saikou writes yan content like no others omg there’s just smth that always ALWAYS draw me back to their writing when it comes to yan content!! i drop everything on hand and RUSH to their blog whenever i see that they posted

[bentosandbox]

hell yea comics. 10, 23, 30, 40, 41 if you like

10. How do you decide what to write?

A little parasite in my brain says hmm today i will do thing and i just roll with the cringe

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to?

omegaverse i think it'd be extra fun when it's 2 emotionally constipated office workers vs a pairing like texlapp whoa who said that does 'daydreamed and doodled a bit but didn't start on anything solid yet' count as never written if yes its then wuxia AU where chen and lin switch places kinda (basically want to extrapolate that part in chen's op rec where the rat king invited her underground)

30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter?

this chen and hoshi one technically but also the chen and swire one that i still havent posted in english so sorryyyyy (i wrote them at the same time iirc.. just didnt have time to draw the second one until later)

first time i forced myself to write internal monologues AND angst in an actual script on google docs instead of just dumping lines i want characters to say in my own discord server channel shoutout to my friend who gassed me up with the comments they left on the doc lmao 'damn i wanna make the angsty af introspective comics i always see' > 'wait damn i have to make it myself fawjkkkkkkkk'

idk if it affected my approach because the Very Serious chen and Lin character study comic i had planned ended up being a shitposty copybook so i went back to my old style of smashing dialogue in a notepad (if the anon that sent the ask about this comic sees this sorry i got cold feet and i still havent exported it out of my tablet)

40. Do you tend to reread fics or are you a one-and-done kind of person?

we don't have a choice do we...

i did just reread the fic i mention below tehe i do reread CN fics way more because sometimes ill be lazy and read it through machine translate while other times i'll sit down and try to translate it (in my head) while EN fics have an easier time searing into my mind

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

its not cheating right

fr tho to write fever dream-esque(?) scenarios that end in girlfail...!!

ok the chenswire one aside the nearl one is also a favourite something about looking at the tired human through the chinks in the infallible knight's armor

[cluelylikesporn]

okay exam update cuz im actually really pissed off.

so im autistic + adhd, and only been diagnosed relatively recently, so i havent really been getting assistance until now. (autism diagnosis last year, adhd 2 years ago.)

my last exam was (still is) this period, and im going home once i finish it. one of my other exams i was sent to special ed (it’s called different things in australia and other schools but i dont wanna get doxxed) and the chick helping me (we’ll call her charlie) told me she couldnt even read the questions out to me… like i legit get more help in my normal exam conditions.

she told me WHILE HAVING A PANIC ATTACK “i think i know why your so upset, because you know you dont listen in class and just sleep and draw on your hand.” cunt, what..?

HOW ARE YOU WORKING WITH NEURODIVERGENT KIDS..?

i literally have spent my whole life wondering why i cant listen in class and hearing “just reread it.” or “your not listening hard enough.” is so fucking tiring. maybe explain it? she refused to help me because i “wasnt approved” to have a helper

the school knows im autistic so why do i have to be approved to get the help i need? like you dont have to make up all these forms and files. you have teachers who can help me literally in the building who could help me but you refuse.

okok i got rlly off topic but tldr on what happened today:

my teacher sent me to the special ed area to do my exam (last time he did they told me to go back) also shout out to my english teacher hes a legend. he gave me my sheet, i took a ritalin, said bye to the people i liked and left. (i used to take ritalin daily but now i jst take it to focus better in exams and shit)

i went to se and saw a couple kids i knew. one i hated and didnt know why he was there, one who has some mental problems so i understood why he was there. hes a sweetie. and some chick i knew who broke her wrist and had to write on a laptop.

so one by one they were assigned a teacher who would sit with them and help them/ read out questions and then the lady said “oh chloe your not supposed to be here, you have to go back to class.”

are you fucking kidding me.

i completely understand its not her or my teachers fault im not meant to be there, but im allowed to be a little frustrated. i asked why i kept getting sent here and why i couldn’t get help.

same shit about documents and boring stuff.

keep in mind i get ndis funding so i thought that would impact my education experience but nope, literally nothing. i also understand there could be things my mum hasnt done and that’s completely ok she has her own life, but also THE SCHOOL KNOWS IM AUTISTIC. that should be enough. its like i only get the help if i start ditching class and become an eshay or some shit like i shouldnt have to become a troubled kid to get help.

so the lady said my only benefit i even got from the school is like 5 minutes extra time. and she told me i could either go back to class or do my exam here( which means i could get no help/ questions read to me.)

ngl this was dumb of me but i said ok bc i didnt want to go back to class after saying bye to everyone😭

so i sat there with one airpod in, a pen that didnt fucking work, the only help i could get was eavesdropping on what the assistant teachers were saying but they were so quiet. i did manage to write some stuff but it was pretty fucking stressful. i couldnt stop thinking about what charlie said (the lady helping me with my maths the week before.)

this may sound super dumb but i saw a crow fly onto a table outside and i felt like it was watching over me. like it was looking right at me. it made me feel a bit better and i got some work done.

it wouldve been fine if those fucking assistant teachers didnt keep giving me pitiful looks like bro. i know im fucked.

anyway i finished my exam (barely) and went to the bathroom to tell my friend ab what happened, caught a bus home and am about to play dbd 😾

sorry for the long post im jst so pissed😭 but ily guys and ill post i swear🙏

song of the day:

[nina-a-pines]

It's a miracle, I can still write! Have a snippet of a Soulmates AU I've sketched (and rambled a lot with @saotome-michi )

-*-*-*-*-*-

It was an uneventful middle of noon, and an 8 year old Nami was comfortably reading a book after hours helping Bellemere-san with the tangerine grove, when a tingling on her arm caught her attention to a new message.

Luffy had been surprisingly quiet today, except for one slight bump on her head that she barely felt and wasn't out of ordinary anyways (this boy got hurt so often), so Nami was kinda curious to know whatever it was that her soulmate wanted to share with her.

The broad letters soon covered her low arm:

"IM GONA BE KING OF THE PIRATES!"

Nami blinked, having to reread the message a second time to garantee she had read it right. Her reaction then was just to sigh and grab her pen.

"So a pirate isn't enough, now you wanna be king of them?" She wrote on the back of her same arm.

"YES!" Appeared on her leg.

Nami sighed once again, this time followed by an eye roll. For almost a whole year now (which's almost half of the time they have been talking), Luffy had put it in his head that he wanted to be a pirate. More than once had he complained to her how Shanks - the said nice pirate who convinced Luffy that being one was the best thing in the world - had made fun of him for wanting to join his crew.

Honestly, Nami didn't see the appeal, no matter how much Luffy tried to sell the idea to her. She wanted to sail the world too, yes, she'd have to if she wanted to draw maps of other islands beside the one she lived on, but she didn't need to be a pirate for that.

With that said, Nami had grown used to Luffy's bold talk along the year, even indulging on it once in a while. Even though he sounded crazy and impractical and delusional, he also sounded... full of life.

And that warmed Nami's heart for some reason.

Luffy - her soulmate - was stupid; but he was a nice stupid who made her laugh.

So even through sighs and eye rolls, the little redhead had a smile on her face as she wrote back,

"Well, don't expect me to call you your Highness."

Luffy's answer started with a 'blergh' face on her hand, "Whyd you do that??"

Aaand there goes Nami's smile, "Do you even know what Kings are?!"

[purpleeivy]

Day 23 of my Daily Drawing. Accomplished Psychiatrist, Loving Dad (who pretends he doesn’t love his family, but only to himself), Westalis’ best Spy, and absolutely hot as fuck, Twilight! Now known also as Loid Forger.

I love Spy X Family it’s so good. I even wrote a story that essentially stole the ending of Season 1 (Cour 2) for part of it. (Not saying what specific part cus i don’t wanna spoil it, but it’s to do with Loid meeting someone). I loved that story i’ve just not been able to write anything for ages. I really wanna. Sorry rambling I’ll do that in a bit. Critic time.

Negatives - I instantly noticed when I uploaded the image that Loid’s left eye is angled left and up, while his right eye is angled right and up. Idk how I didn’t notice that when checking over the drawing lol. Also his head shape is a teeny bit off.

Positives - Literally everything else. I love Anya’s one (shameless self reference), and it is fitting that her father’s drawing be just as good imo.

Rambles time.

I know I said yesterday I am gonna do a thing about Shallan and the stormlight archive, but I realised that that’s gonna take a lotttttt of effort, so I’m just gonna do it when I reread the books. I really want to get that perfect, even if no-one reads it, because I just think it will help me with my mental state a lot. And I’ll probably also rewrite it to be a character essay on Shallan (if I can figure out what those actually are). So if that goes well then I could potentially do the same for other Stormlight characters. (And maybe characters after that.)

Random manga recommendations. If you’re gay and or into manga, then you should read

(Yuri, and i’m 99% sure these are both completely SFW, though I haven’t read the latest chapters)

- Kimi To Tsuzuru Utakata/The Summer You Were There

- The Guy She Was Interested In Wasn’t a Guy At All

and

(Not Yuri but I love it anyway, it might be nsfw at some parts, I don’t really remember)

- Ikemen Joshi To Josou Danshi/While Cross-Dressing, I Was Hit on by a Handsome Guy!

I’ve been meeting up with friends more and it’s been nice, but it’s also made me realise how… not great, i’ve been feeling when im alone. I sort of got used to it so it didn’t feel as bad, but now I’m actually enjoying myself with people I like I’m seeing just how bad it is, cus im comparing this feeling to the good feeling. Idk. It’s weird, I’m not gonna go into it here (in this post, maybe i will in the future)

I’m getting super into One Piece so I’ll probably draw some of those characters. I’m only up to episode 220 or smth, so I won’t be drawing anyone from after that. (and only the Going Merry for now)

Idk if I have anything else to say, so as always.

Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening, and goodnight from me.

love you all <3

(ref image)

[fruit-sy]

Siblings with a Mountain Man/俺哥来自深山 drawings!

Fan art I did of this manhua I've been reading for the last couple of weeks! This manhua has been living rent free in my mind and I cannot stop thinking about these silly goofy lil characters <33

It's a comedy-centric manhua, but it has its serious moments and times where its sincerity really punches me in the gut <:)

I loove the dynamic between the main siblings, Li Mo and Dao Mo.

Dao Mo is a relatively impassive person and gives off a cool-looking vibe at first glance, but that impression shatters as shenanigans happen, with him adapting to urban life after having lived in the mountains for 10 years and embarrassing Li Mo along the way. And as comedy comics are, he tends to dispel moments that are too serious with humor (also maybe as a defense mechanism when he feels genuinely moved by something)

Li Mo is a springy girl whose normal life crumbled as soon "that guy" came into her life. She does a lot of things with earnestness and vigor. She contrasts her brother a lot, very obviously pointing towards the yin and yang principle, and they make for a very entertaining duo. Though, as much as they goof around with slapstick humor, Li Mo really underestimates just how much Dao Mo cares about her.

Dao Mo repeatedly puts himself in harm's way to protect Li Mo and does a lot to give her a normal life, like damn, the boy tries so hard and fails when she starts seeing spirits. Li Mo began to acknowledge him as her brother slowly, and she starts fighting back the danger surrounding her as the series progresses. At the climax, she makes a major decision that changed everything, all with the single thought of "I want to be like him, I want to FIGHT." and BOI, the feeling I FELT WHEN I READ THAT CHAPTER WAS CATHARTIC

It might be simple, but god damn I love it when series build a mutual respect for both sides of the party, when they both acknowledge that they would do anything to protect the other from danger AND I LOVE THAT AUGH

They made it clear that Li Mo can stand on almost equal ground to her brother, she can defend herself physically, but when it comes to spirits, she can't dispose of them easily like Dao Mo can with his taoism skills. Also sidenote I love how badass all the women are in this story, like (points at dorks) DAMN THEYRE SO COOL I WANNA BE LIKE THEM

LATER DOWN THE LINE, WE GET A BIT MORE BACKSTORY AND THAT MADE MY HEART HURT WITH HOW EARNEST IT WAS ;O; Seeing the ending of that arc filled me with a sense of completion, we see just how much the characters' relationship has developed compared to the start.

Though, as much as I enjoyed this manhua and have reread it at least 3 times in the last two weeks, I do have some things that dragged me down while reading it. I think I got "combat-fatigued" from all the fight scenes in the story. Like, maybe because it was my first time reading it and I just really wanted the plot to happen faster bc I wanted to know what happened next and I binged it in a day, but I just skimmed through it quickly and was quite bummed when a lot of the chapter numbers (nearly half iirc) was focused on the combat, and the big baddies getting bigger and bigger-

Next was the typos in the translation. I could ignore some of them bc my brain just, autocorrects the dialogue ig, but sometimes it kills my immersion in the story.

But still, all that aside I really enjoyed reading this manhua! And so I gave it my appreciation in the only way, besides screaming into some text, I know... Which is fanart!!

[valleynix]

GIMME PLS 🥺🙏🙏

I WANNA READ YOUR ORIGINAL WORK

OKAY OKAY

it's under the cut (2.7k words), but fair warning it is most definitely not my best work </3 i got inspired and just finished it but haven't gone back to reread it, nor do i really have a direction for it, so i hope it makes sense LMAO

(it is pretty gay but mostly implied, and pretty angsty. warnings for blood and a little gore :-) )

my apologies for the potentially rushed writing, but:

She is drenched in her enemies’ blood.

She does not know where she is or who she is any longer, for the weight of her sword in her hand is the only thing she feels. Her fingers are cramped and tight, her wrist sore and aching, but she does not stop. She will not stop.

Her love is gone. It is their fault.

The mourning mark of her lady is smeared across her cheeks and eyes, and she wonders if it is the rain or her own shed tears that has made the mark so messy. Would it matter which it is? She supposes not.

Her black cloak blows behind her as another falls to the ground, his throat cut before he could ever think to draw his own weapon. She has done this for what feels like an eternity.

Nothing is new to her.

The man’s torch clatters against the road, his blood leaking from his neck like a river finding its course through the cracked stones. When the flames turn to embers and the blood turns to water, she continues on her path. Her unevenly cut hair sticks to her face as a gentle wind blows through this street, though she is not sure why it feels attached to her skin.

Sweat, blood, rain, tears… She does not know. She does not care to.

The weight of her sword is all she should know.

There are more up ahead, chattering away, laughing at her. Her bones ache and scream for her to stop, but she shoves the feeling down, instead choosing to focus on the way her boots and armor clank as she walks. She is making good time, but she does not know if she will find her way again.

A man and a woman hear her coming, as she has come to expect. She raises her greatsword, gifted to her the evening she swore to protect her love, and brings it down upon them. A spear is driven toward her as the man’s shoulder is cleaved straight through, the blade narrowly missing his heart. He will not live long, and his body hitting the ground seals his fate.

The spear nicks her cheek, slashing along her skin as blood now drips down her jaw. The woman comes to regret that action a moment later when she cannot lift her spear in time, and the sword severs her head from the rest of her body.

She does not bother wishing an easy rest on them as she moves forward, her sword dragging behind her, the steel blade causing sparks to fly as it scrapes against the dull stones. Her dark cloak whips behind her, stains its ends in the blood that threatens to drown her.

It won’t be long, now. This town should be the last. It will be the last.

Her curse will overtake her if she does not succeed this time. She has already failed once too many.

Her head twitches to the side, pain lancing through her skull. She pushes herself up a set of stairs, her left hand struggling to keep her standing. She must persist, must do it for her.

She will not accept another way. She cannot.

But her limbs grow heavy. When did she last eat? Sleep? Could she even call the bones and muscles that ache in her body her own?

She does not remember if this body is hers. Did she not give it up when she swore her life to her lover?

“Swear it to me,” her lady says, kneeling in the tall grass as she grasps the knight’s young face between her hands. Her long hair gently blows in the wind, a stark contrast to the paleness of her face. “You will always come back to me, won’t you?”

The knight nods, dark eyes wide and full of wonder. She takes a deep breath, raising a hand to place her fist over her heart as her jaw sets. “I swear on my dying breath, my lady. My body, my mind, my sword; they are yours to do with as you please.”

Her lady snorts and pinches her cheeks as she releases them. “Don’t be silly. I do not wish for us to grow apart when you leave.”

“When I leave?” the knight asks. She rests her hands on her thighs, clenched. “Where will I go, if I am not to remain at your side? What will I do?”

Her greatsword finds its way buried deep into the heart of a man, squelching loudly in her ears. His blood stains the front of her chest piece and what remains of the colored cloth that bears her lady’s warm colors. She is reminded of a sun setting beneath a mountain, pulling a blanket of clouds over its body as it lays to rest.

She is not deserving of these colors. Her body is no longer what it once was, when they were gifted to her.

The man falls to the tower’s floor, groaning quietly as he draws his last breaths. She continues to the cells, her head throbbing and her heart pounding in her chest.

She ignores these feelings. Her lady is near.

“You are no longer a lost puppy, sweet thing. You need not follow in my shadow.”

The knight frowns, her brows furrowing as she looks to the sword between them. “And… What of this? What does it mean?”

“Is it not a token of your loyalty?” Her lady brushes her hand along the hilt, gently tapping the deep blue stone that rests there. “I gifted it to you, after all, under the assumption you would be mine. Do my words mean nothing to you?”

“N-No!” the knight stutters out, her cheeks flushing deeply. “I mean- They’re everything to me, I… only do not know where I stand. I wish to know how… how you feel, my lady.”

“Oh? No one has dared ask me such a thing.” She giggles quietly, shifting forward to rest her forehead against the knight’s. “You should know it by now, shouldn’t you?”

A sword is jabbed at her bicep, slicing through the cloth as it finds the only spot her armor does not protect. She makes no sound as she swings her own blade over her head, cleaving the man’s arm from his shoulder, as she has done countless times before. He falls to the floor from the force of it, hissing through his teeth as his blood pools around his torso.

She slowly buries her sword into the man’s heart through his weak armor, no match for the steel that burns in her hands. Perhaps they should have anticipated her arrival, and they could have known how to stop her.

As it stands, she goes through them as if they were nothing but dirt beneath her boots.

The mourning mark of her lady drips into her eyes, heat racing up the back of her neck. It stings, but she blinks the bleariness and pain away as she walks forward, her eyes searching for her lady. She must be here. Where else could she be?

Her cheeks flush deeper as she bows her head, her hair falling into her face. It is her lady that lifts her back up, a gentle smile on her lips as she places a soft kiss between the knight’s brows. Her heart pounds painfully in her chest, and she does not understand why.

It has always been her lady that makes her feel this way. Is it not wrong of her? Are they not from two vastly different worlds, their pieces never fitting quite right?

She is a protector. That is all.

“Lost in that handsome head of yours, are you?” her lady quietly asks. Her lips find purchase on the knight’s cheek, lingering for a moment. “My father tells me you leave tomorrow. I… wish we had more time together.”

The weight of the sword now sheathed at her back is familiar as she searches the various cells in this hallway, her eyes straining against the darkness. Quiet wails sound in her ears and things shuffle within them, but she does not see her lady.

She presses on. She must be here.

Blood drips down her arm and causes her clothing to stick uncomfortably to her skin, but she pays the feeling no mind. She is so close to fulfilling her duty and her sworn promise-

To who? Does she remember her lady’s name?

It must be engraved in the locket around her neck. She reaches a hand up, shaking as she touches her neck-

It is gone.

No. No, no, no.

That was all she had left. She has nothing, and how can she? What does she look like?

“We could run away,” the knight jokes, though her lady frowns at it. “I… I’m sorry. I know this is important to your family.”

“So are you. To me, that is.”

Her heart cracks in her chest. She can’t continue like this, she can’t let her lady see how badly she has failed. She swore to protect her, to always come back, and why can’t she?

The knight shakes her head, tugging it away from her lady as she pushes herself away. “You say these things, but… I do not know how to feel.”

Her lady hums, a soft sound that feels like music she has never heard. “Do you find it strange? We can stop.”

“I don’t want us to.”

The knight does not know why she says these things. She is a protector, a warrior. She has no time for whatever one could call this feeling in her chest. Aside from that fact, she is not permitted. What would her mentor say, or the lord? She cannot have what they do.

Soft, uncalloused hands grasp her cheeks again, tugging her attention back to her lady. She frowns again, but it is out of concern, she thinks. “Would you mind if I kissed you? I have wondered of the taste of your lips on mine for some time.”

The knight does not know if her cheeks or ears can burn any hotter. Must she embarrass herself this way?

She stumbles back a few steps, her breathing erratic as she searches the darkness. She doesn’t know where she is, who she is. What has she done?

She has to find her lover. She has to-

She must. She is all the knight has left.

Her mother gone from childbirth, her father never returning from his adventures, her sister disappearing by the river. She has no one.

Tears prick her eyes as she stumbles down the hall, frantic in her search. She must have dropped it. It must be nearby, she couldn’t ever leave it without realizing.

“N-Not at all. My lady.” She swallows the lump growing in her throat, her eyes flicking between the golden hues of her lady’s. “This… is not proper, is it? Should a lord of higher standing not be your fancy?”

“A strong, kindhearted knight that has sworn her loyalty to me? I could not ask for a more wonderful thing.” Her head tilts to the side slightly, her eyes flicking down. “Are you uncomfortable? I only wish for you to feel yourself around me, but if this is too far-“

The knight stops her lady’s worried rambling with a swift kiss to her lips, awkward and weird. She has never done such a thing before, but it takes no time for her lady to take the lead, smiling as she settles into a rhythm.

Her heart pounds in her ears, whispers in her mind as she stumbles into a brighter hallway, blinking rapidly at the sudden light. Two men meet her halfway as she rushes through, her boots thundering against the stone as she bolts through the halls, using a small dagger at her thigh to get through any that wish harm upon her.

Bodies lie in her wake, lonesome as they stain the stones a deep red. She does not regret it, but the tears in her eyes certainly do not help her state.

She isn’t sure what she sees or who she’s looking at. Faces flash in her vision as she pushes forward, unable to get a full breath in, her hands reaching out to steady herself on the slick walls as her dagger clatters to the floor.

Voices shout at her, beg her to stop. She does not.

She cannot.

How could she forget what her lady looks like? Sounds like? She does not remember even a name.

She would be so disappointed. Perhaps it is deserved.

She breaks through a rusted door, staggering into the night and straight down a hill as she loses her balance and whoever was closing in on her heels. She tumbles down, her sword loosening from its strap at her chest and leaving its place around her, harshly smacking against her face. Her cloak strangles her, wraps around her throat, threatens to steal her breath-

She hits a river, sinking toward the bottom almost immediately as it rushes by her, water pounding in her ears. She tries to catch her breath, tries to push herself to the surface-

She must claw her way to the shore, the metal claws on her fingers digging into the sand as she blindly yanks herself forward. The current from the river attempts to lure her to its depths, promising her a name, a face-

She does not listen. The bones in her fingers ache and she coughs, only sucking in more water during her struggle. The muscles in her arms burn but she continues, pushing on, screaming as she pulls herself above the river’s rushing current.

The water she inhaled comes back up as she continues attempting to pull herself onto the dry sand, only accomplishing tugging half of her body onto it. The sand sticks uncomfortably to her face as she vomits what little remains of her insides, gasping in air before the next round hits her like a stone thrown at her chest.

It takes her some time to calm down, for her heart to settle and her ears to stop ringing. She ponders her death, if another her is somewhere in that river, struggling to find her way to the surface. She must be gone, now.

She weakly pushes herself onto her back, closing her eyes as she breathes deeply, attempting to calm her breathing. The tower remains across the other side of the river and voices continue to shout at her in a language she doesn’t understand, but for now, she is safe.

Her lady is still gone. She does not know where to find her, now, or where to go. Is she welcome anywhere? Will they recognize her?

It takes her some time before her limbs feel like her own and she knows she can move once more, despite the creak in her bones and the ache in her muscles. She will have to find her sword, as she refuses to let another memento of her lover’s find its way from her grasp.

The moon shines brightly as she stands, her arms shaking when she rolls onto her stomach, her armor poking into her skin. She uses what’s left of her strength to keep herself on her legs, despite the way they wobble and she staggers a few steps.

She breathes deeply, her heart settling in her chest. The voices continue to shout things she does not understand, and she supposes she never will.

Her blurry eyes search for any sign of her lady’s sword, and she thinks she sees it further down the river’s shore, stuck between two rocks. Its sheath reminds her of her lady’s colors, and she supposes that is all she has left.

As she stumbles down the sandy ground, leaning on sharp rocks and small trees for support, she promises herself one thing.

She will not give up, will not turn from this venture. Does she not deserve better?

Perhaps it is simply in her family’s blood to die for those they love. Has her time come? She would welcome it with open and willing arms, if only it would allow her to see one last time.

The knight reaches for her sword, grasping it tightly between her aching fingers as she stands once more.

She will find her lover, return what was lost to her.

She must.

[foulbearobservation]

29, 32 & 39 for the ask meme if you like 😌

29. Where do you draw your inspiration? What do you do when the inspiration well runs dry?

okay I'm gonna sound like. insane for this I think. but I don't really uhhhh believe in inspiration? if that makes sense? to me writing is a learned skill. I do it every day and I improve every day and even if I write when I don't have any ideas, I'll write around until I find one. I'll describe the scenery from my favorite video game. I'll write something specifically so I can throw it onto the cutting room floor trash document. even if I'm feeling burnt out I try to do my 200 words a day and sometimes that's enough. inspiration, to me, doesn't mean that I have a flash of brilliance it means I sat down and wrote. creatively, does that mean every work is my best work? absolutely not. but it does mean that my art gets made and gets put out into the world at a somewhat regular frequency, so it works I think.

32. What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic etc that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

this is not me just playing to the home crowd on this answer but genuinely this passage from ligaments (rly the whole thing about lilith learning to read/write) literally lives in my mind rent free. I reread it often when I wanna come back to the core of making lilith the world's most tragic little meow meow:

"you knew her inside the moment you realised that you were broken and there was nobody willing to tell you that you were not. / and then the world ate you. just like mother said. / like ink swallows paper."

39. What keeps you writing when you feel like giving up?

My minimum goal every day is like. 200 words. that's like. less than 15 minutes of writing. I find that on days when I really don't want to write, it's easy to just say "well I only have to write for 15 minutes" or "well I only have to write 200 words" and the fact that I have those goals and I've kept those goals low means that I keep my barrier for entry for writing every day low means that I have less days when I feel like, bare minimum, I can't write anything. On those days when I feel like doing nothing I can usually bully myself into one good writing sprint with my writing group so the peer pressure helps too.

[schleierkauz]

Resa and Cockerell?

Resa: When did you first read Inkheart?

I got the book for my 10th birthday and I think I started properly reading it a few months later? Maybe a year? I remember that it spent a long while just sitting next to my bed and I'd just reread the first few pages. My cat really liked to sit on it. :D Eventually I sat down to really focus on it and immediately became obsessed.

Cockerell: What are your hopes for the 4th Inkworld book?

Oh Man. Okay.

Generelly speaking, I hope it opens the Inkworld up a little more without feeling like Reckless Light™. I know Cornelia is really excited about drawing connections between the books and that's fair, but, to me at least, the two stories still feel very distinct. And I hope TCoR fits in with the other three Inkworld books instead of trying to be a hybrid. For example, if some plot point is resolved with the help of Magical Fairytale Item #72, I'm gonna be less than happy.

I also hope it doesn't introduce too many entirely new characters. There should be some, obviously, but the comments Cornelia made about how new people keep showing up in the story made me a little nervous... We already know and love so many players in this world, I want the focus to be on them. That said, I really love the whole witch thing and Jehan's friend sounds adorable, I DO want to know more about her! Just, give me a few chapters about Dustfinger and the Prince and their whole history. With everyone else fridged for the time being, those two should get some quality time together. :')

Speaking of Dustfinger, I am. torn.

Part of me wants him to murder Orpheus. Just straight up kill him.

On the other hand, though... It would feel weird. For all these years, he's been such a pacifist at heart, I wouldn't want him to deal with the emotional aftermath of what he's done. Because despite everything, I don't think he could just walk away from that. Remember when he killed Basta that second time? That scene, short as it is, doesn't feel violent at all. More like doing an old enemy a favor. And I love that moment but something like that wouldn't make sense with Orpheus... Maybe they end up in a situation where killing him would be the kind thing to do, and Dustfinger doesn't? I don't know... Either way, I'm looking forward to the inevitable confronation of these two.

Basically: Dustfinger can kill if he wants to. I'll support him no matter what. <3

Wow I need to shut up. Some more hopes of mine, lightning round:

Brianna content, specifically Brianna-finally-bonding-with-her-father-content (yes I'm still emotional about that wristband she made him)

We meet the Black Prince's younger sisters

The Barn Owl shows up or is at least mentioned

Some kind of throwback to Capricorn and his men, idc what exactly I just want them mentioned

Witch lore. I wanna know all about them.

At least one of the new characters is another Bird Person

Proper love interest for Violante (not the Black Prince, I don't think they'd work out in the long run (although they do make a pretty intense power couple.) (Also Brianna is literally right there-)

Gwin bites the shit out of someone and is also immortal

The Prince's bear bites the shit out of someone and is also immortal

"Orpheus' evil plan fails because Balbulus is racist" plot point stays, that shit is so funny to me

Cornelia really leans into the whole 'Illustration as magic' theme, esp in contrast to 'Writing/reading as magic' as we had it in the previous books

Mo does not fully go back to his Bluejay persona and people who were there for the events of Inkdeath but don't really know him are super confused about why he won't just kill his enemies

Resa however...

Thank you for the questions! :)

[error404vnotfound]

this is mainly on me

(aka v reviews/rants about Anne sin filtros)

because I knew what they were doing with Diana and Anne. and like. I just love their friendship so much. they love and are so important to each other so much my aro heart gets very happy. because look at that framed as the most important thing friendship that's just so rare

but. I was willing to look past it. I can get behind it. I usually don't mind romantic subplots (and one of my favourite couples ever is written by them also), so I thought I would be fine

i wasn't

it's not only that they make them a couple, but also girlies had no chemistry whatsoever???? they were just horny and had horny tense moments that made me open this same app because I'm tired and I don't wanna read that every other chapter. I think once they got together they had one single semi non sexual interaction and no conversation at all which 🧍 ma'am where did their friendship go

best part of the whole thing was Gilbert. no notes. well, actually, have him more on page. girlfriend was barely in it towards the ending which????? you are solving his part of the plot there?????

which brings me to

what the fuck is everyone else doing while Anne is overcomplicating her life. like. I mean we are told people study for exams and Gilbert does publish some fanfiction but ???? idk I wanna know more about fred and his photography or diana and her art???? does she only draw for Anne's stories????

for authors that have done amazing character work in the past this felt disappointing :/

but yeah. hey at least it has a bunch of queer rep that's just dropped in casually with 0 drama I liked that (tho I would have liked a little bit of discussion about the polycule somewhere??? moreover, after we are told Gilbert had issues with a previous relationship??? like. my guy does all the work off screen)

also some thing that bothered me a bit is that a character (Phill) is introduced as using ALL pronouns but mainly she/her because it's what they are used to (well, the Spanish equivalent), but then is addressed as she/her all the time. I get not using elle (the they/them) because a publishing house will go as far, but call them by he/him sometimes maybe idk

now comes the part where I rate the book which is difficult because I have to get to actually despise I'd burn this book levels of dislike to rate a book lower than a 4 (I don't have a system to rate books and it shows because my "yeah I liked this book I guess" rating is 4/5)

i didn't hate the book. I also didn't like it. But I also didn't outright dislike it? I guess I didn't not dislike it ???

also also I do think I would have enjoyed this book a little bit more at another time in my life (? I just have been very tired of the allos recently (more than the usual aroace tired of the allos way) (but again, that's on me for reading the book)

I think I'm settling it as a "idk man I'd just rather go reread some Anne with an E fanfiction I read 3 years ago" 3/5 (I might lower it idk)

memo: develop an actual book rating system

[sxaras]

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE - do you want me to be like this?

₊˚a story in which two teens inexperienced with love learn to love each other.

warnings — selfship fic (osaluma) (livchu), bsd spoilers, angst, fluff, teen love, romance, mentions of traumatic backstories, underage dr.g use (marijuana), violence

MASTERLIST

notes from dazai’s star: err yeah 🫡 (also i do not support naruse’s non-consensual perverted actions)

dazai had some free time, so he decided to read the manga luma had been gushing over on their manga store date. the title looked interesting enough—‘cheeky brat’. not to mention, the art style was right up luma’s alley.

not even a few pages in, his eyes widened, seeing that the male love interest groped the female love interest’s breast. luma couldn’t possibly be into that. and they weren’t, but the other moments of them they enjoyed and craved in their relationship.

he kept reading, knowing luma was over five volumes in but kept rereading because they love the series so much. eventually, he began to see why luma was so attached to this couple.

naruse, the male love interest, fell in love with yuki, the female love interest, even though he had girls lined up to be with him. he went out of his way to go to a place he didn’t enjoy if it meant he could see yuki smile.

he really went above and beyond for her. dazai began questioning his effort into their relationship. was he doing enough for them? had he been treating them like the angel they are?

of course osamu did above and beyond for luma as well. luma couldn’t and would never deny that. but he wondered if he could do more for them.

“dazai, can i come in?” kaori’s muffled voice asked, waiting behind the door. “what do you need?” he called out, paying attention to the manga. “it’s cold, i was hoping it’d be warmer in your room.”

it was true, osamu had a heater in his room. “fine,” he said, allowing her to come in. he stopped her in her tracks as she tried hopping onto the bed with him. “bean bag, i’ll get a blanket for you,” he said, pointing to the bean bag.

she sighed, slouching her shoulders. she went over to the bean bag as osamu got a warm blanket for her. he handed it to her and returned to his bed.

“what are you reading?” she asked timidly. “a manga luma loves,” he explained, not looking up from his manga, clearly invested. “luma has good taste,” he murmured.

kaori frowned, lowering her head. he praised luma so much and ignored her, what did she do to deserve this? she asked herself. “do you think we could ever be more than friends, osamu-kun?” she asked, trying to make her voice sound seductive.

“i told you to call me dazai. and no, i didn’t consider you close to begin with,” he huffed, flipping a page. “wh— what?” she asked shakily. “you may be part of my crew, but i don’t consider us friends—roommates at most,” he explained, not taking his eyes off the manga.

kaori stopped talking, leaning back in the bean bag and wrapping the blanket around her, trying to hold back tears.

“good night, dazai,” she whispered. he didn’t care enough to reply.

music played on the speaker as dazai and luma sat in their forest. “guess what i got?” luma held up their grandfather’s swiss army knife. “to carve out names in a tree!”

osamu followed luma to a tree they thought looked interesting enough. “you draw better hearts than me,” luma mentioned, “i don’t wanna fuck it up.”

osamu took the knife and carved a heart in the tree, adding a “luma +” before handing it back to them. luma carved “osamu” in to the best of their ability. the wonkiness of their handwriting made it feel more authentic to osamu, more realistic, and that’s what luma made him feel like—real, human.

“it’s so cute!” luma squealed, hugging his arm. dazai smiled and kissed their head.

the couple returned to their laid out blanket they used for these trips. luma sat in front of osamu, brushing the hair out of his face and tracing over his bandage covering his eye.

moving down to cup his face, they then kissed him. he didn’t hold back, kissing them equally as passionate. osamu helped them get on his lap as they continued making out.

mid-kiss, he pulled away, earning a cute pout from luma. “so, i began reading that manga you like so much,” he said, running his hands up and down their body. “do you want me to act like naruse?” luma’s eyes widened as their cheeks flushed. “i— osamu,” they began, cupping his face tenderly. “i just want you to be you. that’s who i fell in love with,” they admitted without realizing, smiling.

“fell in love with?” he repeated. luma gasped, covering their mouth. “i mean…yes, i did. i fell in love with you,” they responded honestly. “as much as i didn’t want to and have my heart broken again, i did.”

“luma, i promise i’ll never ever break your heart. it might take me a little more time to learn to love but i still want to be with you forever,” he explained, staring at them admiringly.

“osamu,” they breathed out, trying not to tear up. they smiled and kissed him again and again, falling down with him and giggling. “is this what it’s like to be in love?”

“i…i think it is.”

[talenlee]

Decemberween '23 — Jason!

I think about these friend posts from time to time which runs the risk of making my really cool friends who are constantly doing things and making stuff in the day to day, like, more likely to get attention. And that’s not a terrible thing, after all, this is still the attention economy or whatever, by posting about my friend Amber, I might direct attention to her online presence and her cool cosplays, or if I post about my friend Nixie I might get people looking at her Patreon, all that kinda thing.

I wanna talk, today, this close to Christmas, though, about a friend who doesn’t really put himself out there on the internet, and who isn’t here to ‘sell’ himself. Sure, we’ve done that kinda thing, we’ve all had fun doing things… but

like

Some friends I want to talk about, and who I think about, because they’re my friends and I love them and that’s really cool and really good. Because my friends are great.

You probably don’t know Jason. Jason’s a friend of mine, from in America. Jason draws, Jason plays videogames, Jason likes Star Wars a lot (and that’s been a source of some tension, I suspect). Jason likes Star Trek – really, that’s why I’ve been watching Star Trek at all, as one after another, these series have been made part of my experience and I get to set aside a space of ignorance. Even now, we watch Lower Decks together, which is my favourite piece of Star Trek media.

It’s real funny watching people complain that Lower Decks relies on in-group references for its humour because like, I think those people may have just pickled their brains with those references. I like it a lot and I don’t know if anything in the show is old. I just ask Jason when we’re done watching the episodes.

Oh, I’ve been rereading the Ranma 1/2 manga? And that’s partly because we’ve been hanging around on the Ranma 1/2 subreddit and talking about it. Which is extra weird because that’s how we met, back when I was a kid and Jason was also a kid but the kind of kid who would go ‘I’m not a kid, huff.’ But still, the kind of person we’d look at now and both go: Well, we were kids.

Anyway.

Hey, remember how I mentioned I’ve been trying to draw more? You might have seen it, seen me posting art of just random things that strike my fancy. That’s partly because drawing is something I used to do a lot and I liked it, and part of why I drew so much was because it was something I shared with Jason. Now, don’t get me wrong, Jason is way, way better than I am, and there was a time when I even felt discouraged from drawing because Fox and Jason were both just better than me. Why have my own skills brought to bear when other people were just doing it better?

But Jason, in the early days, was someone I drew with, because I wanted to draw things and wanted to share them with him and, that encouragement came with its own joy. Restarting drawing like I have lately, I haven’t quite gotten back to where I was, but I mean, back then I was drawing strictly because I wanted to draw cool characters with huge boobs or amazing butts or both. There’s time to just enjoy the drawing, as I draw things more and more that I like. I owe that to Jason, Jason is someone who made me remember how much I just like drawing.

And we play City of Heroes! In fact, Jason is the person who got me into City of Heroes. This game that at this point has been part of my life or influential in my life, for twenty years, is a game that I ultimately only started because my friend recommended it, and said hey, we can play together! I write about City of Heroes and I use it to make OCs and I love this game and its universe and it informs a lot of how I think about videogames and about how I think about heroes in superhero stories, and I owe it all to my friend.

Jason is one of the earliest people I drew with when I was a child. Like when I was sixteen, I think, I reached out to a stranger, on the internet, who had a shared interest with me, and that became a way to talk about it, and honestly, it shaped my days. It shaped a lot of my internet habits too. I remember from back then a story about ‘who messages first’ and what that represented. This is really early internet days for me, when a .txt file someone put in their signature on Usenet was imparted wisdom from an older, more serious generation than I had ever encountered. I remember at the time it lodged in my brain that if you message the other person all the time, you want to talk to them more than they want to talk to me.

And anyway, years on, I have learned: That’s stupid.

This year has been a rough one full of people talking about their social networks dissolving. Tumblr is full of ‘jokes’ about how people who have never had a conversation are friends, are mutuals, are beloved and yeah like I get it, I get that human relationships are fluid and complex and take a variety of forms. But you should reach out. You need to put work into those friendships.

If you find yourself unwilling to do that… like, that’s okay? Maybe that’s the emotional level you want that friendship at. That’s okay.

But I have this friendship that has lasted longer than my students have been alive, and part of that is reaching out, and holding on.The platforms you spend time on don’t get to dictate how you should act. You can reach out! You can say hi! You can be nice and friendly!

One of my best friendships started that way.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[bryceslahela]

top 3 most overrated and most underrated choices books?

disclaimer: if u dislike/like these books. good for u. i don’t so pls don’t send me rude anons. if u wanna discuss em with me in a funny or kind way go ahead!!! but i honestly will not care if u try to sell the overrated books in any positive way to me so let’s not waste my time (blocking u) or ur time (writing a comment) <333 now thats been said! go ahead <3 the overrated are under the cut on purpose so u have to scroll through 🤭

top three underrated are:

1) ACOR!!!!!! IDC!!!! literally the best book choices has to offer like y’all fr sleeping on the baddest bitch that is acor mc. she deserves better :(((( also when u play the way i play… stringing all the men along because the real love is REVENGE!!! im gonna replay it again love u <:3333

2) lovehacks!!! yes mc is fugly but idk she’s prettier than trr mc idk how but it’s true. also idc mark, ben and leah deserve better. lovehacks is what friends thought it was. a genuinely FUN show abt young workers in the big city. also u can date them all at the same time like purrrr the scene w/ leah and mark??? cute.. underrated…. we need more….

3) with every heartbeat… the book that made me invest in choices vip…. the book that made me sob… the book that BROKE MY HEART!!!!! FUCK U PB FOR MAKIN DAKOTA SO LIKEABLE AND THEN DOIN ALLADAT LIKE ??? OK U CAN WRITE LIKEABLE LIS SO WHY DONT U TRANSFER THAT TO THE BOOKS WERE THEY ACTUALLY STAY ALIVE????? dakota is dead but REAGAN IS BREATHING??????? anyways…. i need to reread that when my mental health is worse so i can fully submerge myself to my sobbing fest…..

top three overrated are:

1) the whole trr/trh series. boring and dragged out to the point were even the stans were waiting for it to die. the queen elizabeth of the choicesverse. also mc is fugly and hideous. so is drake. maxwell looks like a melted funko pop. asian!liam and hana tho <3333

2) es. doesn’t even make no fuckin sense like fr. i replayed it and was confused the entire time. any book were you have to spend diamonds for it to make sense is IMMEDIATELY shit. but rourke (is that his name?) he was hot … if i could be his sexy lil robot girl then maybe es would have been worth it.

3) ok…. this is hard…. either bloodbound (imma be the one to say it… im brave. it didn’t deserve that many books like…. id was better 🫣) or queen b (it literally wasn’t good at all… just corny :(( i can sit through shit overhyped drama but corny one liners is were i draw the line. also i liked zoey but the book pushed her more as a walking friendly wardrobe then a li and ian/ina was as attractive as sour milk growing another organism within it) or platinum (annoying mc. she did NOT deserve the lis that were available to her. her songs were ASS to!!!! girl u cant sing for SHIT!!! put that fucking banana suit back on 😒)

[randomminty]

Just drawing some gals