#rhine rambling tag

[rhineposting]

rare tes opinion : nerevarines who are in fact nerevar reborn are tragic and great for some if not most interesting plot points, yes

but nerevarines who are just Some guys that literally just happened to fulfill the entire prophecy by luck and enough bullshitting are hilarious. imagine solving several conflicts and ending a continent wide threat because you somehow managed to catfish five different gods and several governments

[m1d-45]

…was birthed chalk

summary: any smith that discards a perfectly good blade holds no amount of power over the craft. perhaps it’s better, then, that the sword is passed onto one who knows better.

word count: 6.1k (good lord-)

-> warnings: spoilers for albedo lore, rhinedottir is Awful and albedo has a small crisis over it.. a metaphor that may or may not make sense only bc i was the one that wrote it

-> gn reader (they/them)

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yum1x || @esthelily || @dedef7890

<< part 1 || < masterlist >

when albedo wakes up, the sun has long since risen.

it’s not a surprise, as he stayed up rather late simply thinking, but it was inconvenient.

he sighed and reached for his nightstand, tying up his hair just enough to go through the motions of the morning. it was a fast, familiar, memorized pattern, quickly waking him up and getting him ready for the day. he rushed a little bit, knowing he’d woken later and rhine was expecting an explanation, but he still exited his room with hardly a yawn, moving for the kitchen. maybe he could indulge a bit, have something sweet- to wake him up, of course, and drain the remnants of sleep from him.

he barely had the chance to step over the threshold before rhine’s door opened and she walked out, bag over one shoulder and a folder in the other. she looked over at him, eyes sweeping over his clothes.

“what are you dressed like that for?”

he glanced down at himself. he wasn’t wearing anything stained or torn, and was practically identical to what he’d worn yesterday. a white shirt and pants, thick enough nothing spilled would quickly reach his skin but thin enough that it wasn’t a hassle if they needed to be disposed of. the same things he always wore.

“what’s the issue, master? is there a fault in my clothing?”

her face twisted like he’d said the sky had turned red. “didn’t i say you were coming with me today? that’s not exactly fit for snow.”

the room suddenly turned into a vacuum, all of the air leaving albedo’s chest even as he took a breath. go with her? where? when had she said so? he would have certainly used the time from yesterday to prepare if she had told him.

“stop staring and change. quickly.”

her words snapped him out of his haze and he nodded, a mumble of ‘right away, master’ clumsily pushed out of his mouth as he rushed by.

what did he wear? he rarely went on trips outside of the lab, and when he did it was never far enough to warrant much more than a simple coat. and where were they going? was it going to be cold? hot? dangerous? would he need to be able to move quickly?

albedo felt like his body was moving on its own, stripping off his shirt and pulling on another before he could make the conscious decision to do so. the flimsy band he used to tie up his hair fell to the floor but he hardly noticed, simply grabbing the more secure one for lab work and wrapping it around his wrist as he continued to change.

he wasn’t sure how, but he eventually made it out of his room in a cohesive outfit, a jacket thrown over his arm. when rhine looked him over again, she couldn’t find a fault, nodding and turning for the door.

albedo fought off a smile.

there was a cold wind outside so he ended up putting on the jacket as they walked, feeling odd about it. it was thick to keep out the chill, but… it was strange to have so much more weight to his movements. similarly, walking in boots instead of simpler shoes felt strange, out of place. he supposed it was simply because he’d never really worn them before, rarely ever venturing out like rhine did…

he followed her through a forest, trying to take in as many details as he could without stopping to sketch. brilliant blue butterflies fluttered on top of yellow flowers, large petals dipping and swaying under the weight. sun streamed through the gaps in the leaves, shifting as the winds rippled through the boughs of oak and pine. it bordered on overwhelming, the sounds of birds he’d never heard distracting him long enough that he nearly tripped over a large root.

rhinedottir huffed, an odd mix of amusement and irritation. “what, you never heard a bird before?”

he tracked a large red one as it hopped across branches, searching for something unseen. “nothing this vibrant… i’ve never been this far from the lab before, master.”

she gave him an odd look. “really? i expected you’d be out and about pretty often.”

he tore his gaze away from the bird to look at her in confusion, but.. she seemed serious. “you told me to practice alchemy, so… i did. i run experiments and rarely leave, only if i’m searching for a substance we’re out of. the farthest i’ve been was only around a five minute walk, to… miss alice called it starsnatch cliff.”

her face twisted at the mention of alice’s name, and she picked up the pace slightly. “don’t talk about her.”

“why? has she done something to upset-“

“just listen to me, alright? don’t.”

the conversation died in an instant, leaving albedo confused once more.

the forest soon broke, the trees dispersing out into a plain, and he looked around, trying to get his bearings. there was a map in the lab but he rarely used it, only ever looking to see if rhine could pick him up a material or another that he needed without going too far out of her way. still, he had a vague memory of it, enough to know the name of the mountain they were approaching.

“is the domain near vindagnyr?”

rhinedottir tensed, her grip on her bag tightening. “it’s called dragonspine.”

the edge to her words shuts down any further questions he had, and he bites his tongue with a nod.

another thing to learn.

they thankfully don’t go deep into the mountain, stopping only on the outskirts. he recognizes the domain they stopped at from the diagram she showed him, the diamond sigils faintly glowing yellow.

he inspected the domain, double checking both the inscription on the bottom and the idea he had to solve it. it seemed like it was feasible, but-

“here.” rhine held out a hand, holding a long sheath. a leather handle stuck out from it, the silver of a guard glittering dangerously, and albedo hesitated before taking it.

“why do i need a sword, master?”

she waved a hand as if it was obvious. “it’s dangerous. now stay here, i’m gonna go find a geo slime.”

“i don’t know how to wield it, are you certain-?”

“if you don’t want it then just leave it behind. it’s useless anyway.”

without any other words, she left, leaving him with a sword he didn’t know how to use.

carefully, he undid the latch and pulled off the sheath, revealing a smooth silver blade. it was simple, with a basic cross guard and a neat edge, but he still felt intimidated by the razor-sharp edge. his specialty was with alchemy, not with blade-work… surely rhine knew that?

albedo flipped the sword over and blinked at the engraving along the center of the blade. wouldn’t it make sense to have it on both sides?

he brought it closer to his face, squinting a bit to make out the words. it was an old sword, evidently, and it showed in the faded marks.

‘as the creator forged, so too do i serve.’

albedo stared.

though the words were blurry and indistinct, he was certain that was what it said. but what did it mean? there it was again, the mention of this ‘creator’, this time on a blade? was it a title, referencing the blacksmith? surely that was what ‘forged’ was there for…

at the sound of footsteps he quickly put the sword back in its sheath, deciding to shelve the thought for later.

rhinedottir came up besides him, chest heaving with effort. one of her hands was carefully cupped, a yellowish slime in her hands. “alright, i’ve got the condensate. whats your idea?”

“the inscription says to take the shortest path and to repeatedly-“

“albedo, the elemental energy in this thing isn’t gonna last.”

ah…. “top right, middle left, bottom left, middle right, bottom right, top left.”

she nodded, walking towards the domain. carefully, she smeared the slime over the sigils in the order he told, each glowing brighter as she went. as every sigil lit up, the path connecting it to the center sigil seeped with energy, flowing down to the middle. when the last of the condensate was pushed into the final sigil, the center one glowed as well, pulsing brightly. with a loud and heavy crack, he domain doors split open, falling inward.

rhinedottir was crouched, wiping the remainder of the slime onto the grass, and she stared at the doors

“you did it.”

warm pride bloomed in albedo’s chest. he had.

he helped her up and she picked up her bag of supplies, but turned to him instead of the door, a stern expression on her face.

“now, albedo, you need to stay close to me, alright? don’t stray off or wander, and if you get lost stay put and shout. domains are dangerous things, and frequently filled with monsters. this one should be empty, but in the case that it isn’t… just don’t go poking around where you shouldn’t.”

he nodded, clutching his sheathed sword a little tighter. a satisfied flicker of a smile crossed rhinedottir’s face before she turned, delving into the domain.

he followed dutifully, making sure to stick to her side. it was hard not to ask to stop and look at a carving on a wall, or an inset of gold upon a door, but the idea of her irritation kept his curiosity at bay. they made their way over mossy and cracked stones, occasionally pushing through creaky, rotten doors or climbing over fallen stone. the air itself felt ancient, important, and he wondered why rhinedottir was searching this one. she want one for history, but surely there wasn’t anything of value here…

they stopped in front of a large door, remarkably intact for the state of the rest of the domain. it was simple, blank, and the only visible mechanism of opening it were the four levers, two on each side.

rhinedottir put her hands on her hips, huffing. “there’s only two of us.”

albedo looked around the room, spotting a large pile of debris and not much else. a plan began to form in his head, a rough draft of possibility, and he wrapped the strap of the sheath around his waist to free his hands. the sword was odd and uncomfortable, but it stayed.

rhine spoke before he could, “any ideas?”

oh.

he cleared his throat, carefully stepping forward to see if she would stop him.

she didn’t.

he approached the lever closest to him, noting the large ball on the end for grip. carefully, he pushed down, surprised to see it gave with little effort. the mechanics were likely rusted and tired, unable to provide the resistance it used to, or maybe the weights had snapped off due to their ropes rotting… whatever the case, it made his job easier.

he let it go, watching it ease back into position, and turned around.

“how heavy is your bag?”

at first, her eyes lit up, but they quickly dimmed. “the angle of the levers is too sharp, it’ll just slide down.”

he shook his head. “no. the levers don’t exert enough force rising up to counter your bag, provided it’s heavy enough. as long as we push it down first, it’ll stay.”

she hesitated, holding the bag tighter, but eventually caved. as she walked over, albedo pushed down the lever again, moving to the other side of it so she could hook her bag on it. her hands hovered around it as he removed his hand, but it held.

a smile spread across her face, and she looked up eagerly. “we need one more.”

albedo turned to the pile of debris and took off his jacket, laying it out on the ground. carefully, he fills it with stone, tying the sleeves together into a handle and carefully hoisting it up. a few rocks slip, but he can tell just by holding it that it’ll work fine.

rhine gets his plan and lowers the lever for him, letting him hang the jacket on it. together, they move to the other side of the door, taking their own levers. creator and creation, in sync, pushing down the levers to a domain.

when the door creaks open, albedo turns to her in joy, delighted at the show of cooperation-

rhinedottir brushes past him, pulling her bag off the lever as she walks past.

the doors begin to slide close and albedo rushes to slip between them, leaving his jacket hanging in his haste, and shivers at the cold in the new room.

it’s dark, more so when the doors shut with a bang. the only light is a pale blue in front of him, the shadow of rhinedottir outlined within it. she’s peering down at something, her bag dropped at her side.

the floor is covered in something dark, something that floats when he kicks at it. he crouched, careful not to touch it, and sees they’re… feathers. thousands and thousands of feathers, littering the floor and walls. they’re large, smooth, as if all the feathers on an impossibly large bird had simply… fallen off.

the sound of a zipper draws his attention, and he looks over, standing. the source of the blue light is gone, the light now white and coming from a headlamp on rhinedottir’s head. she’s zipping up her bag, a self-satisfied smile on her face. “i should have brought you sooner, your skills are a pretty good tool.”

the air went cold.

ice quickly crawled through albedo’s veins, faster than it would naturally just from the chill. an unnatural, frozen mass settled in his stomach, fed the more he turned over rhinedottir’s words in his mind.

she didn’t seem to notice, busying herself with brushing off feathers from a door in the corner, but albedo couldn’t shake it off as easily as she did.

why did it bother him so much?

the walk back to the lab was cold, both because he had left his jacket and because it was nearing nighttime. the lamp on rhine’s head was the only source of light, forcing him to walk behind her and keep his eyes trained on the floor to watch where she stepped. now that it was dark, he could see that something in her bag was glowing, blue light barely edging through the gaps in her zippers. she’s taken something from the domain, but what?

he didn’t notice when they arrived, too lost in his thoughts, only pulled out by the sudden warmth around him. he shut and locked the door and watched as rhine goes through her normal routine. boots off, coat off, bag in hand, and it’s only when she pushes open her door that he takes a step and realizes a problem.

“master?”

she pauses, slight annoyance flashing for a brief moment across her face. “what?”

albedo undoes the loop of the sheath, holding up the sword, but she shakes her head.

“keep it. you’ll need it later.”

without another word, her door closes, the silent click of the lock solidifying the barrier between them.

the next day is wrong.

it’s the only way he can describe it. there’s a tension in the air he can’t quite understand.

he’s cold even under his blanket, and he thinks about putting on his jacket only to remember he doesn’t have it. the floor is cold, and he shivers as he walks to his door.

the fire is out, which explains why the room is so cold, but it still feels empty beyond that. everything is in its place, nothing is overtly missing, but…

albedo grabs a lighter and some tinder, crouching besides the fireplace and relighting it. sparks fly and flame catches, and he stays for a moment to warm up, looking around the room. snow has swept in besides the door, which makes him frown. why would rhine leave again so soon after a discovery?

the fire crackles and pops to life, and he stands, backing away a bit so he doesn’t get burned.

what’s wrong?

why does the room feel so empty?

he turns, intending to check the small table by her door where she sometimes leaves him notes, but his attention catches on his desk.

it’s mostly as it was when they left the day before, with one vital exception: a large and thick book, weighing down two envelopes.

if he had a heart, he had a feeling it cracked.

he feels… a word comes to mind, dread, but he doesn’t understand it, not fully. his breath picks up as he approaches the book, as his shaking hand brushes over the print of his name in his master’s handwriting and he feels cold.

‘albedo,’ it reads. nothing more. nothing less.

his chest feels tight, his mind running rampant as it tries desperately to catalogue, define, and diagnose whatever makes him feel so nervous.

carefully, cautiously, albedo pulls the envelope from beneath the leather bound book, feeling afraid.

he pulls out his stool and sits, mostly so he doesn’t feel as nauseous, and rips open the letter, pulling out the twin sheets of paper inside. its… small. the ‘paragraphs’ are barely a line or two long, yet the handful of sentences feel like they’re being forced into his mind by chisel.

Kreideprinz,

I have found what I have been looking for. Locked within the domain we searched was the Heart of Naberius, and I have no further matters to attend to here.

Go to Mondstadt. Find my old friend, Alice, and give her the recommendation letter. Then, complete your final assignment. Any other projects you were working on prior are now void; consider this to be the only one that matters.

Your final assignment: show me the truth and the meaning of this world.

— Gold

he reads and rereads the words over and over again, but they don’t stick. his hands are shaking, worse now, and something in his chest begins to hurt. he checks the other page but only finds a map, the backs of both papers empty. nothing more. nothing less.

albedo drops the papers, if only to read them without the words shaking, but finds that his sight has begun to blur. he wipes the water from his eyes and tries again, and again, and again to understand what’s written in the letter.

rhinedottir always said that if he didn’t perform well she would simply leave; was this the end result of that? had he failed to keep up with the pace she had silently set? was there some silent cue he was meant to follow, something to direct him to the answers she wanted quicker than he would organically find them? was he meant to be quicker, more efficient, was he meant to find things at such an inhuman pace because he was never truly human to begin with?

‘kreideprinz,’ she says (nothing more, nothing less), pretending as if the title from his ‘childhood’ wasn’t something he had clearly failed to earn if she had left, if he had somehow failed. ‘recommendation letter,’ for an ‘old friend,’ as if she hadn’t stopped talking about her after the incident with klee, never inviting them back no matter how many times albedo subtly hinted alice might be able to help her.

even as he stands, as his mind registers the command of his final assignment, a large portion of his mental space is taken up by the instincts she drilled into him, desperately attempting to make sense of at least something.

maybe it’s hunger, his thoughts nudge, but he’s never had the largest appetite to begin with, and accidentally skipping days of meals while he was focused on a project never made his stomach hurt like it did now. he feels- he doesn’t know how he feels, he could stop and sit and think for a year but never know. the words he’s searching for are out of his reach, blurry, unknown to him even as he feels them all the same. he knows that it’s likely some sort of panic response, the ever-analytical sector of his mind forever chugging away and collecting data on his own feelings, but he doesn’t know why.

why?

he pulled a bag from his closet, blankly running through a checklist his brain pulled from thin air. the book rhinedottir left him was tucked into a pocket, the letter put away while the map stayed out. ‘mondstat,’ she said. he’d heard about it from alice—made sense, he was supposed to go there to see her—but while the name was familiar, he still didn’t know where it was.

he’d packed. nearly all of his belongings were tucked within the bag, save for maybe a few of the early textbooks he studied from simply due to space and weight. still, even as he set it on his desk and stared at the map, reading the names yet not registering the information, he didn’t feel ready.

feel. the word was beginning to lose meaning.

he felt things he didn’t understand and didn’t feel what he thought he should. he wasn’t angry that she left without warning, nor sad at the lack of assignments or the vagueness of the one he did receive. he wasn’t resentful—a word that hardly applied to him anyway—because she had left before she reviewed something he’d submitted to her. he wasn’t anything he knew, and everything he didn’t.

he was just… hollow.

albedo wiped the tears from his eyes and made an effort to read the map, understanding only the location of the lab, the marker designating north, and the city labeled mondstat. he folded the map and put it in his pocket, pulling a lab coat over his shoulders and hefting the bag. the door was cold, the wind outside even colder, and as he stared at the key in his palm, he wondered if it was even worth it to lock the door.

metal twisted within metal.

the chalk prince crumbled.

the first thing albedo noticed about mondstat was that it was tall.

buildings stretched higher than he’d ever seen, walls so tall he had to look up to see the guards patrolling along the top, bows in hand.

the second was that it was an island.

he checked the map rhine left him—and blocked out the part of his mind still documenting the bitterness in the back of his throat, wondering if it was emotion or illness—and upon further inspection, if he squinted.. the blurry lines revealed there was in fact water around the city.

he folded it away. at least he knows he has the right place?

he steps from the treeline where he’d been resting, pulling the familiar weight of his bag i’ve this shoulders and-

“albedo?”

he freezes, barely a foot from the shade of the whispering woods.

he turns, slowly, and sees red within one of the bushes. bright, a hat on top of a red coat, blonde twin tails broken up by specks of grass caught within them. the clover charm on klee’s hat caught the light, shining, and a warm pressure built up in his throat.

familiarity.

“klee.”

he can’t stop the way his voice almost cracks, strained with his journey (he’s alone) and the realization he’s been avoiding (maybe he was meant to be)

she lights up upon recognizing his voice, quickly rushing from the bush to latch herself onto his side. her arms wrap around him, and he tentatively sets one of his on her hat, unsure where to put it.

(her hair reminds him of rhinedottir’s, of the time she spent meticulously washing dust and debris from it after a long journey, of the blades of grass she flicked into the fire as she braided it away, tying it with a bright red ribbon alice had gifted her)

“klee’s so happy to see you! what are you doing here? where’s your mom? are you here to stay? oh, can i show you my new dodoco?”

albedo picked through her questions in his mind, deciding which would be safe ones to answer. “i’m here for your mother, alice. i’m… to deliver a letter to her.”

klee backed away, fitting her thumbs under her backpack straps. “klee can take you to her! i was going back to the city anyways.”

he glanced at the forest. “what were you doing there?”

her face suddenly flushed a bright pink, eyes flashing with what he assumed was embarrassment before she rushed forward, taking him by the hand and walking at a shockingly fast pace for somebody so young. “don’t worry about it!”

albedo had a feeling he should.

nonetheless, he followed, letting her lead up up to and across the bridge. it was empty, an eerie feeling settling over it as he walked. he wasn’t sure why; maybe it was the imposing height of the walls? maybe it was the guards in front of the gate, swords at their sides?

(suddenly, he was aware of the blade hanging at his side that rhinedottir had given him. had she known that would be the last time they met? or had she intended to teach him how to wield it?)

(he’s not sure which is more unbelievable)

the guard on the left brought his hand up in what albedo could only assume was some form of salute, in the process slightly blocking their path. “klee. who is with you?”

“this is albedo! he’s the son of a friend of mama’s, and klee’s friend too!”

the knight scanned him up and down, lingering slightly on his sword.

(would he have the heart to hand it over? would he feel better without a reminder of her, or worse that he’d give it up so easily?)

the guard eventually settled with a second salute, dipping slightly in a half-bow. “mondstat welcomes you, strange yet respectable traveler. please state your identity and purpose; the knight of favonius are here to ensure your safety.”

‘knights of favonius’… the name sounded familiar, but he couldn’t tell why. maybe from one of alice’s tales?

still, he dipped his own head in greeting, partially to stall. ‘identity’…

“i am albedo… disciple of rhinedottir in the study of alchemy. i am here to deliver a letter to alice, klee’s mother.”

klee looked up at him with a pout. “you’re not staying longer? what happened to all the things we were going to do?”

he didn’t remember ever committing to anything prior. “that isn’t my choice, klee. even if i wished to stay, i have nowhere to.”

the knight cleared his throat before the conversation could continue. “according to the knights of favonius handbook, we are to accompany travelers through the city as needed…”

“it’s okay mr. knight! klee knows her way around the city! i can take albedo to mama and then show him around.”

the knights were clearly uneasy about the prospect, likely because of klee’s age, but eventually nodded, moving back to their posts.

“mondstat welcomes you.”

klee quickly pulled him forward again, into the city, a quick ‘thank you!’ thrown over her shoulder that was likely lost in the sea of noise.

mondstat was loud. and full. more people than he’d ever seen in his entire life were gathered in just the simple courtyard she pulled him through, the calls of venders and the orders of customers melding together into an indecipherable mess. he was thankful she took him to the side, up a staircase, if only to get away from the massive crowds.

“mama is at a meeting with the knights right now, which is good! you can bring her your letter and get help from the knights at the same time,” klee explained, slowing down slightly from all the stairs. no wonder the walls were giant: so was the rest of the city.

he tugged her back, slowing to a stop. “klee, i don’t think i’ll need the help of the knights. if alice is in a meeting, then we shouldn’t bother her.”

“who said i was in a meeting?”

klee moved faster than he did, turning towards her mothers voice and running towards her, attaching to her side much in the same way she did to him. the thought pulled the corners of his lips into a smile.

“mama!”

alice laughed, catching her daughter easily. “hello, little clover.” she looked up, shock and recognition pooling in her eyes. “albedo? what are you doing here? is rhinedottir with you?”

his muscles tensed at the mention of her name, the memories of the past week of travel threatening to bubble up. he swallowed them down and hoped his voice wasn’t shaky, “no, but i’m to bring you a letter from her.”

alice’s eyes moved to his shoulders, to the large bag he’d been carrying. “are you staying here?”

“…i don’t know.”

her face twisted with something, and she turned her attention to klee before he could ask.

“clover, could you do me a favor?”

klee stepped back, “of course! what is it?”

“i need to read over albedo’s letter and sort some other things out, okay? while i do that, could you show him around the city? he’s never been here, and i’m sure he’d love for you to help him get his bearings.”

klee nodded, clearly excited, and alice walked around her to him. he pulled the letter from his pocket, but she reached for his bag instead. “let me take this.”

“that’s not necessary, i-“

“-have nowhere to go, albedo. i’ll hold your things while you walk with klee.”

something earnest and soft cradled her words, a care to the way she smiled at him when he caved and handed over his bag. he felt lighter without it.

before he could think about it further, alice was gone and klee had taken his hand in hers again, tugging on it.

“albedo? are you okay? you look upset.”

ah….

he tried for a smile. “i was just thinking about something. where do you want to go first?”

she studied him for a moment, squinting slightly, before apparently coming to a decision.

“we’ll go to the cathedral first. mama always says that if you ask the creator really nicely you’ll sometimes get help with whatever your problem is, and you look like you have a lot of problems!”

there it was again, that title…

she began to walk before he could say anything, taking him up let another flight of stairs. this one was longer, curving, and gave him time to figure out how to phrase what he wanted.

“klee?”

she turned, but didn’t so much as slow, “hm?”

“who’s the creator? you left before you could say last time.”

klee did stop this time, so abruptly he nearly ran into her.

“how do you not know? everybody knows.”

she spoke with a mix of confusion and… something akin to indignation, so strange coming from somebody so young that by the time he registered her words, she had pulled him along again, faster.

“everybody knows,” she mumbled to herself. “everybody. the grand master asks for guidance and captain kaeya for wisdom, mama prays for knowledge and klee asks for inspiration. how do you not know?”

he felt bad, somehow, even though it wasn’t his fault that he didn’t know. he knew that, he wasn’t a fool, it wasn’t his fault, it was…

(flashes of blonde hair flicker in his mind, the sharp command to ‘try again, and get it right this time’ echoing in his mind. already, it felt like a year ago he last saw her)

(could be truly blame her when his mistakes were his fault?)

klee leads him up to a large building—‘cathedral,’ he remembers—but takes him past the large doors, to the back. at the end, behind it all, was a small park-like space, large stones spaces equally across the space. the stones are carved with words, but she doesn’t let him get closer to read it.

she pointed, and he followed, jumping slightly at what he saw. against the back wall of the cathedral, seeming oddly at rest for being carved of stone, was a large statue. the pedestal it sat on was simple, but littered with offerings, the flowers looking fresh. if he had to guess, it was likely a shrine of sorts, probably to-

“that’s the creator.”

ah. he’d thought as much.

klee sat him down in front of the shrine, beginning to tell a story. it’s simple, one told to children, but it’s gets the message across to him.

the creator was to teyvat what rhinedottir was to him. divine hands shaped the mountains and plains, breathing life into the soil. the very purest form of creation, forming something- forming everything from nothing, the smallest of flowers and largest of trees planted with barely a thought. rivers cut through the earth at will, every blade of grass placed by the hand of the one that made it.

klee told a story of the birth of the universe, of the colors on an invisible pallet that painted the planets and dotted the sky with stars. she sat on stone and fiddled with her dodoco, her voice never wavering as she repeated everything she was told, graciously filling albedo in.

in return, albedo untied the sword at his side, laying it down in front of the shrine. the blade felt uncharacteristically heavy, his hands cold, but he still set it down gently.

it was a lot of information, but he managed, carefully filing everything away as the way he viewed the world slowly changed. it made sense; everything had to come from somewhere, after all.

he looked not at the sheath, but through it, at the inscription along the center. ‘as the creator forged, so too do i serve.’

perhaps he and the blade were more similar than he thought.

no bladesmith made a weapon without a purpose. no alchemist dedicated years to a project only to stop when they reached the final product. nothing was made without being tested, nothing was alive without being taught, no sword was made without an edge.

and yet, somebody had to teach the smith. somebody had to guide their hammer to the stool, their hands along a sharpening stone, trained them in the skills of polishing and oiling. no god created an art without a an artist, and no teacher let their pupil loose without granting them the skills to continue the craft.

no tool existed without intention. no smith existed without their mentor prior, nor without their own student to teach.

rhinedottir may have abandoned him, but his creator never would. they would not let him be set loose without purpose, nor discarded without reason. he could tell, simply by sitting in front of the marble statue, that this was the case.

he could feel it in the wind. in the gentle breeze they guided, sweeping his worth from his shoulders. in the ground beneath him, that never grew uncomfortable. he could sense the subtle presence of the creator, the way the grass seemed to point towards the pedestal of the statue or how the sun seemed a little less harsh back here making it evident. albedo could feel the creator’s intentions as his eyes moved back to the sword, to the reminder of rhine that bore a carved reminder of them, feel the reassurance in the etched words. amidst the sea of confusion surrounding rhinedottir’s disappearance, they had appeared, stretching a hand to pull him out and back ashore, to the banks of stability.

albedo reached back.

they felt warm.

[aresmarked]

this is semi-tangential but. another reason i do think saria and silence will at least get on the path to reconciliation (hopefully in whatever third Rhine event they give us), aside from the theme of overcoming tragedy, ifrit's determination, is the more rhine-specific theme of conflicting and overlapping perspectives... aka, vision.

(two small moments from DV will be mentioned here, as a heads up.)

where saria and kirsten's perspectives shared a dream of rhine being a leader in scientific research, they clash (and have long been in conflict, as we see) about what is justified for that. saria's values... are not systemically baked into rhine. thus, i think, why she needs rhodes'/the doctor's help in correcting rhine's path. it's far beyond her alone now and... uncertain if her and kirsten ever would see the same about means. certainly emotional trust would be hard to come by again.

saria and silence, as we know, still have very similar views on scientific progress. and perhaps ironically i think saria and silence, while knowing vastly different factual amounts (takes a moment to wryly look at saria for still choosing to not share even a little more with silence, for god's sake you could at least imply a little more about what's going on) also have very similar emotional views. they think rhine as it is cannot remain so... but specifically, they both can't forgive themselves for their parts in ifrit's suffering (small snippet of DV ahoy).

...and even though they don't interact with each other in DV, there is a 'shared' moment I want to point to, small as it is to DV's overall plot. because they did bother to make a very symbolic image for it, haha~

far from each other, physically, emotionally, they still think, on occasion, the same.

[arkiwii]

PLEASE DO RAMBLE ABOUT SARIA IM PUSHING THE AUTISM BUTTON.

I’m newer to arknights and I’m a fan of Saria and Silence because I have eyes but I’m more curious to know what things you wish people talked about more wrt Saria and her relationship to the other RL characters? She has so much complexity as a character but she’s often shown so reductively.

Also cool art (prozd tumblr tags noises)

YOU WON'T HAVE TO ASK ME TWICE THEN.

If you're new to Arknights, then I would gladly recommend you the official Rhine Lab manhua! It's basically everything about Rhine Lab past, Silence and Saria's relationship, and Ifrit's origins, so VERY good to know

But anyway, ABOUT SARIA

You're pretty right that her complexity as a character is not often shown, and it makes me sad, the community often thinks of her as just "divorced dad", the joke is alright but it says so little about her and mostly, about why she's like that

Most people might think "poor Silence" or "poor Ifrit", but rarely anyone feels pity for Saria?

She's someone who grew up without a family. I mean, in the emotional sense of the term. She has a dad, a very likely absent mother as she was never mentioned, but never she grew up lile any child should. She was pressured to act like an adult and independently by her dad when she was just a child. And most importantly, grew up with the firm idea that emotions are useless. Crying won't solve anything. It's showing weakness. You shouldn't get attached to things or people, because it will make you suffer.

But now what does it says about Saria, now that she's an adult? That she's very good at being an adult, of course, but when it comes to emotional stuff, she never grew up. She built some shield around her heart, a VERY sturdy shield, that sure protected her and helped her a lot in her growth, but she came to realize that this shield is now disabling her for her emotional relationships. However, herself don't know how to break it.

I simply love all the psychology and symbolism in this. NoriZC (the artist behind Saria, Silence, Ifrit, and a few other Rhine Lab characters) often associated Saria to rocks and Silence to plants. Rocks are hard to break, but yet, plants can still grow on them. The rocks are also associated to her Arts, as she can use Calcification - a very sturdy shield, basically.

But now this is what truly hurts her. That she can't understand emotions. She's slowly learning (seen with how she learnt with Ifrit and to actually care about her), but there's always things that will escape her. Why Silence is so mad at her, she doesn't really know. She believes that she made a mistake, obviously she blames herself for not being able to stop Kristen or Rhine Lab, but does she understands that Silence is scared that she has been abused and britally faced a reality she never thought existed?

And now she doesn't understand her own emotions neither. She never had a family, never learnt to love, and now that she lost what was the closest to a family, she feels like something is missing. Is she fighting because she wants to stop unethical experiments and save lives? Or is she fighting because she wants Ifrit and Silence to be safe? It might be both, but the second option is out of her understanding. It's just feels weird to tell yourself you care about people when you never learny what it felt to care.

And now, she's alone. Silence may have support from Mayer, from Magallan, Kafka, Ptilopsis, the Doctor themselves even. But Saria? Nobody understands her. Nobody can truly see what is under this shell of hers. Her heart can't be reached, even by herself. It almost feels like that she doesn't care.

That's something I've been thinking about a lot recently. Saying that Saria doesn't care is deeply wrong. She just doesn't know how to show that she cares.

Anyway, that's what I think is extremely interesting in her relationship with Silence and Ifrit. That with them, she would be able to break this shield, to show her heart, to learn what she never got taught, to care and to love. But for this to happen, it would need Silence to perceive Saria's heart and understand it.

[gold-rhine]

Masterlist by vibes,   Masterlist by characters

Inazuma Rewrite: Act 1, Act 2, Act 3

All fics - tag rhine writes

NSFW fics - rhine writes filth

SFW fics - rhine writes light

request rules  taglist

Character studies - rhine character study

Lore ramblings - rhine lore study

[shuttershocky]

Hello! I'm not the same person as that anon from a few minutes ago, but do you have any wisdom about using Ifrit? I picked her up last week when I got very, very lucky with recruitment and found a Top Operator tag, and she's now at E1 L74 SL7 and I'm pushing her to E2 as fast as I can. She is extremely fun and very powerful, and man am I glad to have an AOE caster on hand who's stronger and more supportive than Lava, but I do worry a bit about how many maps she'll be useful on. Her weird range makes finding a good spot for her kind of tricky, and I imagine things get even trickier when she's using her S3 and have to make sure she doesn't kill herself.

(I hope this wasn't too rambly! I've only been playing for about a month and a half, and this game is very exciting.)

The easiest advice I can give about Ifrit is: Don't be afraid of not being able to find the Magic Ifrit Tile that lets her destroy the whole stage on her own. You'll get better at reading maps and finding her best position with practice, but Ifrit is already good even if she protects just one tile.

Yes. Just one tile is already good. Her damage output is insane enough that if you can hold an enemy in place within the one tile she's protecting, they will just die.

You WILL get better at map reading the more you use Ifrit, so for now just focus on getting her to protect the 1-2 most important tiles on a stage. Eventually you'll be able to pick out an Ifrit tile from the map preview alone, or even create one by rearranging your ground units so the enemies they block all all line up next to a ranged tile.

(Also please do look up the Rhine Lab manga, grammar errors in the fan translation aside, the way ittells the story of Ifrit and her two moms is extremely good.)

[imperhine]

PER ASPERA AD INFERI.

rhine's ghost sideblog (@fr-nka is my main)

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requests open + ask box open!

i mostly write x reader but sometimes i'll do pairings! i currently write for:

ghouls: aether, dewdrop, mountain, rain, phantom, swiss, ifrit

ghoulettes: aurora, cirrus, cumulus, sunshine

*i write for the characters and not the person behind the mask.

papas: primo, terzo, copia/emeritus iv (how do i write secondo)

writing tag: rhine.writes

*minors dni with my 18+ content.

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masterlist - last updated: april 8 2024

navigation + my tags

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a little more about me...

az/rhine | 18+ | any pronouns

hiya! i'm rhine. like, the river. you can also call me az :) i mostly write but i will try to draw sometimes. don't hesitate to send an ask in! even if requests are closed, i still love to chat or discuss headcanons and silly things with you.

i don't know how else to introduce myself since i think you can see more of that through my rambling on this blog. my favorite ghouls are highlighted above :D my favorite ghost song right now is dance macabre. i use a lot of emoticons instead of emojis just because they're charming

likes: tarot decks, overanalyzing song lyrics, journalling with a copious amount of stickers, greek yogurt

dislikes: the sun blinding my eyes, clocks that make too much noise, disorganization,

[clanonadventures]

what if,,, serial killer y/n is friends with the evil clanons,,, and y/n is very overprotective

DEMON!BASIL:

- Please do protect him - Does not have any real sense of damger - Has almost gotten murdered by peacock for eating the sound proofing - "It feels good on my teeth :(" - Will definitely help you kill people - As long as he gets to have the heart from the person you killed, hes happy! - Almost like a puppy in a way - Give him headpats please- - Not exactly protective over you, mostly because he knows you can handle yourself - Still follows you around though - If you teach him about how humans work, he will platonically love you forever

SIREN!SQUIDDY:

- Well, she’s a siren, so better be a good swimmer - Killer!y/n and siren!squid killing duo - She lures the victims behind rocks or into the water, then you kill them together - Squid has and makes jewellery out of bones and stuff so expect her to give you a lot of those, cause she appreciate s you~ - If you’re overprotective, don’t worry, so is she! perfect friends, huh? - Will sing you to sleep with her angelic voice (siren) - Will adore any attention she gets that isn’t just for her body, since she’s used to luring middle aged creepy men into the water - All in all, if you treat her good, she’ll treat you good

BROADCAST!PEACOCK:

-Broadcast!peacock's whole thing is killing, but done in a different manner -while her friend seems to prefer hunting them down, she prefers to use her broadcast systems to brainwash them into doing what she likes -she tends to be quite hostile to everyone, so you'll probably be an equal amount of protective over each other- -she usually makes melodies for the broadcasts, but occasionally she might compose a few songs just for you -also you probably end up yelling at the other anons for making too much noise -she'll calm you down afterwards so you don't end up killing someone

SPIDER!BUG:

- Spider!Bug prefers to lie in wait for a long time and trick others into their traps and doesn't go on sprees and pursuits unlike their friend. They're happy to teach a few tricks they use, if Y/N desires some. - They don't mind the over-protectiveness of their friend since despite their venom and other such things...they are quite fragile, being a spider. It's a nice feeling to be liked enough someone would protect you too, even if it's a bit overbearing. - Bug isn't quite use to being protected, since most spiders stick it out on their own as soon as they're born, so it takes some time getting use to, which can result in some fights. - Bug is the person you call when you need to hide a body. Not like the authories gonna go into a huge spider's nest, will they? And bug will eat the bodies too so there's not a lot of evidence in bugs den. - I am so sorry if Y/N has arachnophobia and meets Spider!Bug. - Will protect you in return for protecting them. Symbiosis!

YAN!RHINESTONE:

-Not really friends with most the evil anons. -Always worries that an evil anon is gonna try to take his darling. -So that doesn't really change. -The most effort that Yan!Rhine would put in when interacting with You (or any evil anon) is trying to avoid it. -Sooooo yeaa. No friendship there.

BEAST!HIDDEN:

- Beast! Hidden is well, a beast - he doesnt need to be protected so he will protect Y/N - sometimes acts like a wolf - Beast!Hidden doesn't have friends so they don't know how this whole friendship thing works - They would help Y/N with killing - everyone who sees Beast!Hidden runs away so yea - is also very overprotective - If Y/N gets hurt he will go crazy

YAN!DUTCH:

- ‘wait killing was my thing’ - confused if she’s the yandere’s victim or the yandere - would probably help hide the body - does feel flattered hrbhbf - tags along in all kinds of killing sprees - has a weapon collection for things I’m not allowed to say :) - kind of the overprotective type too but her tough act collapses pretty fast - sobs to y/n whenever something happens that ruined her day

CANNIBAL!COKE:

-someone being protective of them is a new concept to them but they dont complain, and actually quite like the feeling -cannibal!coke often helps y/n get away with murders, eating the corpses -also sometimes they just make it easier for them, biting their victim's legs and such to keep them from running -always by y/n's side like a guard dog -naturally they are very protective of y/n as well -doesn't bite y/n despite their hunger

ASSASSIN!MINT:

-assasin!mint is a bit wary of y/n at first, but deep down, she kinda likes them -probably the only one that assasin!mint shares her mint candy with -also overprotective, but she hides it to keep up her "emotionless" thing -if y/n has any enemies that did really bad stuff to them, let's say that assasin!mint has a way to make people "disappear" -if y/n gets close enough to assasin!mint (in a platonic way), assasin!mint might tell them her past, or even drop the "emotionless" act and start showing other emotions

ENDERWALK!MASK:

- they're confused on why you would want to protect something like them - but they find it adorable - congrats they are now your parent - they give you tips on how to hide corpses and new killing forms - if you get caught they just teleport in and take you back to their house and ask what made you get caught, then give you a tip on how to get out of that situation - don't ask how they know so much - while their good counterpart doesn't approve of your "career" choice, she's surprised Enderwalk cares so much for you - Mask may just tell you how much Ender rambles for hours about how great of a friend you are, just for ender to be extremely embarrassed later - both like you loads, even if one doesn't condone what you do

[losingmymindtonight]

Trope: Sleepy

There were a lot of perks that came with being a billionaire, but the ones Tony Stark ended up appreciating the most were nearly always the things other people wouldn’t even consider.

Sure, he liked being able to leave large tips on small checks. He liked being able to buy clothes without checking the price tag. He liked knowing that no matter what college Peter chose, the tuition wouldn’t be an issue.

But the thing that he was grateful for now was the fact that since the MedBay was his, and because he employed everyone in it, he got a lot more leeway that he would’ve in a general hospital.

For one, he’d been able to hire the best pediatric dental surgeon in the country to do Peter’s wisdom teeth surgery. He’d also been able to demand that Helen Cho worked beside him. She was partly there to advise him on Peter’s enhancements, and partly there because there were very few people Tony trusted with Peter’s safety, and she was one of them.

He was also allowed to stay right beside Peter as they prepped him for the surgery, and had Helen’s distinct promise that she’d fetch him the second they were done. He could’ve stayed for the whole procedure, even, but Peter had scrunched up his face at the suggestion, murmured a lazy ew, and made Helen promise to kick Tony out before they started.

Now, though, as Cho and the anesthesiologist bustled around his hospital bed, Tony could see that the kid was shamelessly grateful for his steady presence at his side.

“Are you even sure I need the IV?” Peter asked, eyes darting between the elastic tourniquet the anesthesiologist was fastening around his bicep and the needle on the tray beside her. “Can’t you just, I don’t know, wack me over the head?”

Tony snorted. “You’ve got a thick head, kid. Wouldn’t work.”

Cho joined in his amusement, patting Peter’s other arm gently. “It’ll be alright, Peter. I even brought out the numbing cream we usually use with little kids. You don’t feel a thing.”

Peter cringed away when he saw the anesthesiologist prep the needle, and Tony gently tipped his chin up and away, forcing the kid’s gaze onto his face rather than the imminent poke to the back of his hand.

“Why is it,” Peter murmured, “that the older we get, the more pain people think we’re cool to tolerate? Like, shouldn’t everyone get the numbing cream? Is suffering, like, a right of passage or something? I don’t get it.”

“Hm.” Tony entertained the rambling partly because he adored the kid, and partly because it was a fantastic distraction. “You make a solid argument, squirt. Maybe you should grow up and be a doctor like Cho, here.”

“Technically, Tony, I’m a geneticist.”

“You’re also a doctor.”

“In my spare time.”

Peter gave her a lopsided smile, Tony’s hand still pressed against the side of his face. “Well, I think you’re a great doctor.”

Cho smiled back. “That’s just because I stitch you back together again after you’ve done doing something foolhardy.”

“Isn’t that a valid reason?”

“All done!” The anesthesiologist declared, taping down the kid’s cannula. “Everyone ready to get started?”

Peter started twitching nervously. Even when Tony let go of his chin, his eyes stayed locked on his face. “I, uh, this is gonna suck, right?”

“No,” he reassured, keeping his voice calm despite his own nervousness. “You heal quickly, and I made opioids that work on you for a reason. You’ll be fine.”

“It’s a very easy procedure, son.” Tony bristled at the way the dental surgeon (Doctor Rhine, maybe? He hadn’t really been paying much attention during the introductions) addressed the kid, despite knowing that it was all done in kindness. “And you won’t remember a bit of it.”

Tony shifted a little, trying to relieve some of the stress on his back from perching awkwardly on the edge of the kid’s bed. Peter’s IV-free hand shot out and latched around his wrist.

“Wait, don’t go,” he was blushing, but didn’t let go, “not, uh, not yet. Please?”

“Easy, I’m not leaving until you’re too drugged to notice.” He patted the kid’s shoulder gently. “We talked about this, remember?”

Slowly, Peter’s grip eased. “Sorry,” he muttered.

“Hey, no apologies. Just relax.”

“Alright,” Cho gave the anesthesiologist a quick nod, “you ready, Tony?”

“Mhm.” He cupped the side of Peter’s neck, firm and steadying. Part of him wanted to crack a joke about filming the kid and uploading it to YouTube later, but he held back. He knew the kid was nervous about the whole thing, and he doubted it’d help. Instead, he just swiped a thumb over his cheek and smiled encouragingly. “Hey, what’d you do on patrol last night?”

“Um, I stopped a robbery on 77th. Then I helped out with a fender bender a few blocks down. On 150th, I think? ‘N then I went to, uh, to, uh... to Delmar’s.” Peter blinked rapidly. “Whoa.”

“Strong, isn’t it?” Cho touched the small of Tony’s back, out of view of Peter. A barely-there reassurance.

“Yeah. Whoa.” The kid’s eyes wandered up to meet his. “Mis’er Stark?”

“Hey, buddy. You’re alright, just let the drugs to their thing.”

He brushed his fingers through the kid’s bangs softly as he dozed off, heart warming at the fact that he never once looked away from Tony’s face, even as his gaze got glassy and unfocused.

“You can go now, Tony.” Cho patted his arm. “He won’t remember any of this.”

“Yeah, of course.” He made sure Peter’s head wouldn’t roll uncomfortably when he relinquished his hold on his face, then rubbed his cheek to catch his admittedly drowsy attention. “Hey, kid. I’m gonna let them do their thing. You alright if I go for a bit? I’ll be right back as soon as they’re done. You won’t even notice I left.”

Peter just let his eyelids droop shut. “M’kay.”

“Good boy.” He didn’t know why the kid’s easy acceptance of him leaving made him feel just the tiniest hint of rejection. After all, the whole point of the drugs were to chill him out. Tony had helped design them with that in mind. But... still. A part of him wanted the kid to ask him to stay. “I’ll see you in a bit, alright?”

He didn’t get a response. Peter's eyes were closed, breaths deep and slow.

“He’ll probably just nap now.” Cho pulled him away and pushed him towards the door. “Go on, Tony. The sooner we can start, the sooner you can help him wake up.”

Back in the waiting room, he found himself envying the kid the drugs. He’d have given just about anything to get to check out during the hour and a bit he spent loitering in the halls. He drank three cups of coffee, ate a bagel, counted every ceiling and floor tile in sight. All the while, he had to force himself to studiously ignore the fact that just a few rooms away, someone was pulling his kid’s teeth out of his skull.

And, okay, logically he knew he was being a drama queen. Peter was fine. Wisdom teeth extractions were, like, the most mundane procedure of all time. Nearly everyone had it. Hell, he had had it, far enough back that Jarvis, the human Jarvis, had been the one taking care of him in the aftermath. He knew that his parents must’ve been alive, but they hadn’t been there. He remembered that, even through the haze of painkillers.

Peter wouldn’t experience that, at least. He’d come back to himself with Tony at his side, and it would only be a few hours before May arrived. Peter had adamantly declared that he’d rather have her see him once he was fully conscious and recovered, and nobody had argued with him.

Tony felt a little touched that the kid had been fine with him seeing him drugged off his ass. Then again, they’d been through this kind of thing before, with countless broken bones and gushing lacerations, courtesy of reckless patrols.

The doors to Peter’s room opened, and Cho and the dental surgeon walked out. Cho was already giving him a thumbs up before she’d fully emerged, aware of his tendency to work himself up during waits.

Bless her.

“All good, Tony.” She smiled, coming to a stop in front of him. “Textbook surgery, not a single complication. Two of them were impacted, which we already knew, but they weren’t difficult to remove once we got in there. He was perfect, too. A real trooper.”

“So he’s alright?” He felt a little ridiculous for needing the extra reassurance, but not ridiculous enough to avoid asking. “You’re sure?”

Doctor Rhine (Tony decided he was sticking with it) glanced at Cho briefly before nodding. “As Doctor Cho said before, Mister Stark, he’s perfectly alright. A little out of it, but nothing you wouldn’t expect after a wisdom tooth extraction.”

“He slept through most of it, which is what I was hoping for,” Cho added. “He woke up a little near the end, when we were inserting the gauze.” She grinned. “He asked for you.”

His heart clenched. “Was he upset I left?”

“No, no. He wasn’t distressed. He just asked where you went, and then said he wanted you to come back.” She nodded behind her, in the general direction of the kid’s room. “And on that note: you’re welcome to go grant him his wish. Just because we’re not sure how his system is going to react to the painkillers you synthesized, I’d like to keep him in there for his first dose. As long as he doesn’t have a reaction to that, we’ll just wait until he’s awake enough to head up to the penthouse. There’s a nurse in with him now, but you’re welcome to take over.”

The idea of Peter asking for him soothed the piece of him that was still chafing over the kid’s easy acceptance of him leaving earlier.

“Yeah, right.” He made a beeline for Peter’s door, barely pausing to turn back. “Thanks, Helen. Thanks, Rhine.”

He hoped he got the man’s name right.

If not, whoops.

The kid was exactly where he’d left him, although someone had removed most of the monitors and other equipment. The IV was still in the back of his hand, probably for easy administration of pain meds later, but nothing was attached to it. He looked asleep, face peaceful and eyelashes brushing his cheeks. A curly-haired nurse was standing at the kid’s shoulder, talking to him gently. She looked up when Tony stepped in, smiling.

“Hey, sweetheart, look. Dad’s here. See? I told you he was on his way.”

He thought about correcting her, then didn’t bother. He kept most of the details about Peter confidential, even from the medical staff, but he knew that they extrapolated, made assumptions. He didn’t even blame them. It was just human nature.

It would take to long to explain the truth at this point. And right now, he just wanted his kid.

“Hey, Pete.” He kept his voice hushed, setting his palm over the kid’s forehead in greeting. “How’re you feeling?”

Peter’s head lolled slightly in his direct, lazy smile forming around the cotton in his mouth even as his eyes stayed shut. “Mis’er S’rk.”

“That’s me.” He glanced up to the nurse, who was watching him with a knowing smile. “How’s he doing?”

“Perfectly.” She matched his quiet volume, and he made a mental note to give her a raise. “He’s been waking up a little these past few minutes. He tried to sit up a few times, which went about as well as you can imagine. He should settle down now that you’re here, though. Most kids do once their parents are in the room.”

Peter opened and closed his mouth around the gauze lazily, eyes cracking open just a sliver. “Di’ you leave me?”

Tony forced himself not to flinch. Man, this kid really knew his soft spot.

“Just for a bit, squirt.” He used his sleeve to wipe a bit of drool off of Peter’s chin, careful not to jostle his jaw. “They had to do the surgery. I was right outside, though.”

Peter’s face scrunched up in thought. “I… I don’ remember that.”

“Good.” It was good, too. He’d been having nightmares about the kid remembering the surgery for weeks. Sure, it wasn’t the same as having a metal reactor screwed into your chest, but Tony’s brain didn’t make the distinction. “You’re not supposed to.”

“W’s I sleepin’?”

“Kinda, yeah.”

Peter hummed in response, turning his face into the palm Tony pressed against his cheek.

The nurse nudged his arm to catch his attention. Man, he’d forgotten she was even there.

“I’ll step out, now. Doctor Cho’ll be back in a bit to check on him and see if he’s ready for some pain relief. Don’t be concerned if he falls back asleep, that’s very normal. Most kids are happy to nap once they realize that they’re with someone they trust.” She paused. “If you need to leave to do anything else, just hit the call button and I can sit with him for you.”

“No, I’ll stay. But thank you.”

“Of course.”

Once they were alone, he hopped up onto the bed, tapping Peter’s ear until he recognized the change of positions and started a series of clumsy attempts at octopusing his way into Tony’s arms. He helped him along, eventually settling the kid against his chest. He rubbed soothing circles over Peter’s back as he grew loose and heavy against him.

He was glad that the bed had already been raised into a semi-reclining position, because he wouldn’t have been able to fumble with the controls and also keep cradling his armful of limp teenager. After a little shifting, he found himself decently comfortable, and settled in for the long haul.

Cho came in about a half an hour later, took one look at his position, and started laughing quietly into her sleeve.

“Yeah, yeah,” he massaged the back of Peter’s neck as an apology for the noise, although the kid slept on, oblivious, “we’re very cute. Just take the picture for blackmail and move on.”

“I would never.” To be fair, he believed her. “Has he been sleeping since you came in?”

“He was awake at first, but then he conked right out on me. Nurse said that was normal.”

“It is. He’s still got the sedation in his system, and his body is probably trying to heal.” She moved to their bedside, checked Peter’s pulse on his wrist. “Do you think you could get him to wake up for me? I want to see how coherent he is, and ask if he’s in any pain.”

“Yeah, sure.” He shook Peter’s shoulder. “Hey, Pete. Wake up, buddy.”

“Hm.” The kid’s brow furrowed in displeasure. “Don’ wanna.”

He laughed. “Yeah, I know. Just for a bit though, squirt. Cho wants to talk to you.”

“Hey there, Peter.” Cho bent to look at his face. “How are you feeling?”

The kid dragged his eyelids open, blinking rapidly to try to orient himself. “Tired.”

“Are you in any pain?”

“Hm. Yeah. Ow.” Peter fumbled up a hand to poke at his cheek, but Tony caught it before he could. “Ow. M’ face hurts.”

Tony’s gaze snapped to Cho, and she was waving off his concern before he could even voice it. “Relax, Tony. The sedation is pretty limited in the analgesic department, and I guessed he’d go through the lidocaine quickly.” She held up a syringe. “I came prepared.”

He let out a genuine sigh of relief. There was nothing he hated more than Peter in pain. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” She injected the painkillers into Peter’s IV port. “The pain should be better in a second, Peter. You just keep cuddling with Tony.”

“Oi,” he glared, “we’re not cuddling.”

“Looks like cuddling to me.”

“Well, it isn’t.”

“What is it, then?”

“It’s... physical reassurance.”

“It’s cuddling.”

“Shut up.”

She laughed, turning her attention back to the kid. “Do you feel better now, Peter?”

“Mhm. Does Mis’er Stark have t’ leave now?”

“No, buddy,” Tony rubbed his back, “Mister Stark’s staying right here.”

“F’r the surgery?”

“You already had the surgery, kiddie. You’re all done.”

“Oh. Di’ I do good?”

“So good. A model patient, I hear.”

Cho walked towards the door with a smile on her lips, waving goodbye before slipping out silently.

“Mis’er Stark?” 

Peter blinked up at him heavily, little grin on his face. Some of the gauze had come loose, and Tony pushed it back into place carefully. Once he was done, he smoothed a few curls away from the kid’s forehead, soft grin coming unbidden. “Yes, Mister Parker?”

“D’you... D’you know h’w much I love you?”

His heart stilled. No, seriously, he swore he could feel it falter.

“No, bud.” The words felt numb in his mouth. “I... I guess I don’t.”

Do you love me? He thought. Do you really? Do I even deserve that?

“I... I love you... uh...” He watched Peter struggle for a unit that made sense, and some of his shock was swept away by the wildfire of his own love raging through every inch of his chest. “I love you ‘s far ‘s I c’n reach.”

There were times when Tony was struck by how young Peter was, how much the kid was still very much immersed in childhood, even if he liked to play at being an adult. This was one of those times, and it hit him out of nowhere with the full force of a speeding train.

He hugged him closer, voice rough. “I’m taller than you, kid. I can reach higher.”

“‘S not a... a compe-competi-comp’tition.”

Tony physically held back the laugh that rose at Peter’s absolute butchering of competition. “Of course it’s not,” he soothed.

Peter seemed to ignore his own declaration, trying at another clumsy metaphor before Tony could even finish. “I-I love you ‘s high ‘s Spider-Man c’n climb, Mis’er Stark. ‘S... ‘S really high, y’know.”

Peter’s head slipped forward a little as he spoke, so Tony gently repositioned him so it was resting on his collarbone and brushed the bangs out of the kid’s face. “The suit can go to space, kiddo. Got you there again.”

If he was being honest, he’d expected the kid to have lost his train of thought long before now, but he was determined, it seemed. “I love you to... to...” He blinked slowly. “Love you to... Antarctica. ‘N the North Pole.”

“The South Pole’s in Antarctica, kid.” The whole conversation was ridiculous, and it was making him feel gushy and gross, but in a way that was actually kind of nice. “Santa’s on the other side of the world.”

“‘S... ‘S not.”

He smirked at the kid’s drowsy stubbornness. “Australia’s farther than Antarctica. So I win once again.”

Peter twisted himself so he could slide further down Tony’s chest and gaze up at his face. He rushed to support him.

The kid shot him a dopey grin. “‘M gonna win. I got one.”

Tony ran a finger over his temple, right along the hairline. “Oh?”

“Mhm.” Peter’s eyes closed, then opened. His stubborn determination to finish their little game seemed to be just about the only thing keeping him conscious. “I love you t’ the Kuiper Belt ‘n back.”

If this went on for any longer, Tony was going to end up crying.

“Well,” he swallowed back a wave of emotion, “that is a really long way, huh?”

“Mhm. I win. D’... D’d I win?”

Tony dropped his voice to a whisper, smiled softly. Screw his reputation. It’s not like anyone could see this, anyway. “Yeah, buddy. You won.”

Peter seemed contented by the words, and Tony waited for the kid to relax against him before dropping his forehead against the crown of his head and letting the final layers of his armor shed, leaving him exposed and vulnerable and frighteningly adoring.

“You know, kiddo,” he breathed slowly, fully aware that this was the cheesiest thing he’d ever done and not caring in the slightest, “I love you to the edge of the universe and back. And just for reference, there is no end of the universe.” He shifted his precious bundle closer to his chest. “I love you more than I’ve ever loved anybody.”

Peter stretched, fingers tangling in the hem of his shirt and voice barely audible. “Mm. M’kay. You win.”

He’d expected to be more horrified that the kid had heard him. Instead, he felt a deep sense of satisfaction, like he’d just fulfilled an innate need without even recognizing it. 

“You know,” he whispered, “I hope you remember this.”

“‘Course I will,” Peter mumbled back, “‘M... ‘M Spider-Man. Spider-Man ‘members important stuff.”

He chuckled. “Yeah? Well, good. ‘Cause this is very important.”

And so are you, he thought, smiling like the world was in his arms.

(And, in a way, it was.)

[heartofoshun]

Another questionnaire meme

I  was tagged to answer this by @musinshadw

I wanna tag @lucreziaborgia @petitedilly (French is fine if it means more likely you will answer) @anghraine @markedasinfernal  @starspray  @pageleaf @kanafinwhy -- ten is too hard and I am spending too much time looking for people! Everyone pile on if you want to answer.

First name: Janet Nicknames: Oshun (fannish pen name) Jenny when I was little, Mac in high school Zodiac: Aires Sexual orientation: het Favorite fruit: bananas or strawberries or blueberries depending upon quality Favorite season: Autumn Favorite books: too many - lifelong--Jane Austen, Lord of the Rings, Silmarillion, I, Claudius, The Iliad, One Hundred Years of Solitude, Moby Dick, The Scarlet Letter, Mary Renault’s books, The Golden Notebook, The Idiot, War and Peace, etc., etc. Current favs (last few years) -- Ellen Kushner’s Swordspoint books, Katherine Addison’s The Gobin Emperor, Megan Whalin Turner’s Queen’s Thief series, Sharon Kay Penman’s The Sun in Splendour, Hillary Mantel’s Wolf Hall series, etc., etc. Favorite flowers: those rambling roses that spread all over a trellis and explode into a fully-blown state really fast--don’t know what they are called. We had a huge uncontrolled bunch covering a big trellis outside of our kitchen door in the house where I grew up. Favorite animal: Horses. Coffee/tea/coca: coffee is my addiction Cat or dog person: meh--not that kind of pet person, I raised children instead and they absorbed all of my energy and affection Favorite tumblr: this is impossible--I like a lot of different blogs for totally unrelated reasons--friendship, fandoms, fandom archives, history, special interests, art, travel photography, general aesthetics, even institutions like museums or associations Dream trip: I’ve blown off a few that I missed and are no longer possible for me like a boat trip down the Amazon or a trek the length of the Silk Road! How about a summer in Tuscany or a boat trip down the Rhine (trying to think of places I have not been, not the known comfort spots I love). Number of followers: it fluctuates just below 600. That seems like a glass ceiling for me--I obsessively prune porn-blog bots and the like--so there is NO padding.

[rhineposting]

for a guy who talks a lot about justice and equality, fontaine under neuvillette's rule sure has one hell of a wealth gap, loopholes allowing for child trafficking, people working on slavery wages and like three different mafia families.

it's so funny, justice for me not for thee he said, oh yeah and for the melusines too

[rhineposting]

y'know what's another interesting yet horrifying thing i've noticed about Belos.

in almost every scene he has with Luz, on top of doing everything he can to overpower her emotionally and mentally...

He also always make sure to somehow overpower her physically as well. And always directly with his own hands (metaphorically and literally), when he certainly knows a combination of glyphs that could do the job of restraining Luz just as well. But no. It's always hands, something bodily.

Even in his child disguise, he either pulls Luz down under the excuse of cowering behind her, or directly grabs her in a way that now in retrospect looks downright aggressive and forceful instead of innocently blunt.

And on top of that, he's visibly satisfied when he believes he finally forced Luz to submit and listen to him after he starts petrifying her.

Even at his lowest, reduced to almost nothing, aside from a last attempt at manipulation he still tries to physically assert himself over her.

Truly, Dana Terrace and co. went above and beyond making him so terrifying and downright creepy, and we're still speaking of the sanitised version of The Owl House that Disney allowed to air.

Usually, I would have liked to prompt you to think of what could have been if the show had a higher age rating, but honestly, I don't think anyone actually wants to imagine that.

[rhineposting]

The sheer amount of parallels between Nigredo and Scaramouche goes SO CRAZY IT'S UNREAL.

[rhineposting]

rhinedottir is like the dio brando of genshin impact

[rhineposting]

Don't you guys ever think about how the first time Subject 2 tasted normal food only when abandoning his identity for the sake of posing as Albedo. Don't you guys ever think about how before that, he only had whatever Dragonspine offered to eat. Stolen supplies from the Fatui at best, half-frozen carcasses from all sources at worst. Don't you guys ever think about how he spent the first few weeks of his second life like an animal and not a person. Even less than animal, as they are born already knowing things like running, hunting, fending for themselves. Don't you guys ever think about how he was born with nothing.

[rhineposting]

say what you want to say about belos and you're probably going to be right, but you gotta admit - he really upped the ante for children's cartoon villains. he's so unapologetically disgusting and weird, even likeable things about him are a result of him being a freak show of a man.

so many other villains recently were played somewhat safe recently, or at the very least striking a wonderful balance between entertaining and horrifying, which of course is not a bad thing.

then we have belos. he's a literal witch hunter and has blood of hundreds of innocent women and men on his hands from the start. then he killed his brother and took his corpse apart for years without ever burying it and kept it on his desk like a souvenir. and when he's not being a tyrant and an incredibly abusive parental figure, he's pretending to be a small giggly child in his own mindscape for no reason. his face is literally rotting away, his body has gaping holes from it all over. he breaks open and eats live pets of people working for him.

literally nothing sympathetic or forgiveable about him, and I love it.