#save my money

[mysteriouslytransparentwitch]

I counted and I have €930 monthly direct debit

[antiprivateeractivist]

"it's okay to live with your parents as an adult if you're disabled" "it's okay if it's a cultural thing" "it's okay if you're trying to save mon-" shh. listen. it is okay for any reason. you don't need to have a justification. if your parents are alright with it and you're alright with it you can just do it. peace and love on planet earth etc etc

[cookinguptales]

You know... I had an experience about two months ago that I didn't talk about publicly, but I've been turning it over and over in my mind lately and I guess I'm finally able to put my unease into words.

So there's a podcast I'd been enjoying and right after I got caught up, they announced that they were planning on doing a live show. It's gonna be near me and on the day before my birthday and I thought -- hey, it's fate.

But... as many of you know, I'm disabled. For me, getting to a show like that has a lot of steps. One of those steps involved emailing the podcasters to ask about accessibility for the venue.

The response I got back was very quick and very brief. Essentially, it told me to contact the venue because they had no idea if it was accessible or not.

It was a bucket of cold water, and I had a hard time articulating at the time quite why it was so disheartening, but... I think I get it a little more now.

This is a podcast that has loudly spoken about inclusivity and diversity and all that jazz, but... I mean, it's easy to say that, isn't it? But just talking the talk without walking the walk isn't enough. That's like saying "sure, we will happily welcome you in our house -- if you can figure out how to unlock the door."

And friends, my lock-picking set is pretty good by this point. I've been scouting out locations for decades. I've had to research every goddamn classroom, field trip, and assigned bookstore that I've ever had in an academic setting. I've had to research every movie theater, theme park, and menu for every outing with friends or dates. I spend a long time painstakingly charting out accessible public transportation and potential places to sit down every time I leave the house.

Because when I was in college, my professors never made sure their lesson plans were accessible. (And I often had to argue with them to get the subpar accommodations I got.) Because my friends don't always know to get movie tickets for the accessible rows. Because my dates sometimes leave me on fucking read when I ask if we can go to a restaurant that doesn't keep its restrooms down a flight of stairs.

I had one professor who ever did research to see if I could do all the coursework she had planned, and who came up with alternate plans when she realized that I could not. Only one. It was a medical history and ethics class, and my professor sounded bewildered as she realized how difficult it is to plan your life when you're disabled.

This woman was straight-up one of the most thoughtful, philosophical, and ethical professors I've ever had, one who was incredibly devoted to diversity and inclusion -- and she'd never thought about it before, that the hospital archives she wanted us to visit were up a flight of stairs. That the medical museum full of disabled bodies she wanted us to visit only had a code-locked back entrance and an old freight elevator for their disabled guests who were still breathing.

And that's the crux of it, isn't it? It's easy to theoretically accept the existence of people who aren't like you. It's a lot harder to actively create a space in which they can exist by your side.

Because here's what I did before I contacted the podcasters. I googled the venue. I researched the neighborhood and contacted a friend who lives in the area to help me figure out if there were any accessible public transportation routes near there. (There aren't.) I planned for over an hour to figure out how close I could get before I had to shell out for an uber for the last leg of the trip.

Then I read through the venue's website. I looked through their main pages, through their FAQs to see if there was any mention of accessibility. No dice. I download their packet for clients and find out that, while the base building is accessible, the way that chairs/tables are set up for individual functions can make it inaccessible. So it's really up to who's hosting the show there.

So then and only then I contacted the podcasters. I asked if the floor plan was accessible. I asked if all the seats were accessible, or only some, and whether it was open seating or not. Would I need to show up early to get an accessible seat, or maybe make a reservation?

And... well, I got the one-sentence reply back that I described above. And that... god, it was really disheartening. I realized that they never even asked if their venues were accessible when they were booking the shows. I realized that they were unwilling to put in the work to learn the answers to questions that disabled attendees might have. I realized that they didn't care to find out if the building was accessible.

They didn't know and they didn't care. That, I think, is what took the wind out of my sails when they emailed me back. It's what made me decide that... yeah, I didn't really want to go through the trouble of finding an accessible route to the venue. I didn't want to have to pay an arm and a leg to hire a car to take me the last part of the journey. I didn't want to make myself frantic trying to figure out if I could do all that and still make the last train home.

If they didn't care, I guess I didn't either.

If they'd apologized and said that the only venue they could get was inaccessible, I actually would have understood. I know that small shows don't always get their pick of venues. I get it. I even would have understood if they'd been like "oh dang, I actually don't know -- but I'll find out."

But to be told that they didn't know and didn't intend to find out... oof. That one stung.

Because.... this is the thing. This is the thing. I may be good at it by now, but I'm so tired of picking locks. I'm tired of doing all the legwork because no one ever thinks to help me. I'm tired of feeling like an afterthought at best, or at worst utterly unwelcome.

If you truly want to be inclusive, you need to stop telling people that you're happy to have them -- if they can manage to unlock the door. You need to fucking open it yourself and welcome them in.

What brought all this back to me now, you may be asking? Well... I guess it's just what I was thinking to myself as I was tidying up my phone.

Today I'm deleting podcasts.

[ryllen]

🌾 . 🍚

[lazylittledragon]

do i have to post an in-depth tutorial on how i make my frappes at home if it'll get people to stop going to fucking starbucks

[foe-paw]

YOU THOUGHT THAT YOU COULD OUTSMART THE VERY THING THAT RUNS THE BLOOD OF YOUR KIND?

[emotional-emotion]

Seinfeld (1989 - 1998) 5.08 The Barber

[redbuddi]

Bitches acting like boycotting Nestle and Kelloggs and Coca Cola be hard as if they couldnt have been buying generic brand the whole time

[lucabyte]

Taking pride in One's own appearance.

[ohcaptains]

JJ has a girlfriend that’s got expensive taste. and it’s not even as if you’re rich or anything. you just have a part time job that allows you to buy shit. sprays, lotions, oils, scrubs, perfumes…you always smell good and feel soft.

JJ got a look at your bathroom and thought he’d walked into a bath and body works. stood there for literally half an hour, just going through all your stuff. opening bottles and sniffing them. even put a little on himself and rubbed it in. made a face as if, yeah, that shit is nice.

came out smelling like lavender and sea salt.

when he walks back to your room, you look up from your phone and make a face. “there you are, thought you’d fallen in.”

JJ just gets back into bed with you, and burrows his face in your neck, looking at whatever you’re scrolling through. it’s a few seconds later that you lean back to look at him.

“did you?” you start, before frowning and sniffing his head.

“did you use my hair spray?”

JJ frowns, “…no.”

“then why do you smell like spring on the sea front?”

“is that what it’s called?”

you hit his arm, “jay that shit cost me $30!”

“what!” he exclaims. “for that tiny bottle?” he shakes his head and goes back to laying on you. “you shoulda told me you wanted that, babe, i’d have just robbed it for you.”

[spacepunksupreme]

Before I throw away these pencil stubs I’ve been hoarding, admire how small they are. The magic of a pencil extender

[mysteriouslytransparentwitch]

universal guidance for the financial and material aspect for this spring 2024 with the help of my tarot and oracle

universal guidance for the financial and material aspect for this spring 2024 with the help of my tarot and oracle.

We start with the oracle from Greek mythology: we talk about the notion of making efforts, of continuing and persevering, of refining, there is also a notion of accepting all forms of help. With the world map aka aphrodite, we are talking about a new cycle which is in its beginnings, it may still be fragile, this new cycle can lead to chaos like eris but we ask you to keep the spirit of artemis, to focus on goals. You have become aware of your mistakes from your past and present and the consequences on your life path of yesterday and today and the future. Yet you end with Charon and Persophone = a big transition and transformation towards a new life cycle.

with tarot cards: we are talking about an energy of desire to create a new beginning, a desire to take a part of the financial abundance in the world (yes, there is money in this world) there may be tensions between two people as a couple or with your boss (negotiation) the wheel will turn favorably because the person is hesitating between two options. A choice will be made here, an announcement here intervenes, it can create a favorable but somewhat unstable position. However, you will accept so that you can move forward towards your stability and renewal. We end with the sun, the most beautiful card.

[simplyghosting]

Turns out the cure to impulse purchases is $15 shipping and handling

[linterteatime]

My piece for @hkhallowzine ! My old computer really wanted to perish while making this but I didn't allow it ❤️

[just-null-cult]

i love the more well known characters and all but im pushin them all aside to focus on those in the back. i love background characters so fucking much. ino..... ino come back..

[savaralyn2]