#seriously why could every story involving a contract could be solved by someone reading the fine print

[abhainnwhump]

Whump Contracts

They're verstitle.

(Content warnings: Workplace abuse, pet whump, manipulation, possession, slavery, victim blaming, financial abuse?)

Demon Whumper forcing Whumpee into a contract to possess their body.

Whumpee is signing up for an acting role and they're over the moon about it. The problem? They look at the contract they have to sign for it. Whumper wants them for a little more than acting.

Whumpee signing themselves into being a slave/pet because of their self-hatred.

Whumpee unwillingly signing themselves into being a slave/pet.

Whumpee can't read, so they rely on Whumper to explain what is on it. They lie.

That fantasy trope where someone snaps their fingers and the paper and quill appear out of thin air. - Bonus points if it's out of fire or there's some ghost chanting as Whumpee signs it.

Whumper using the contract as a defense in case the authorities/Caretaker find them.

"You should've read the fine print."

Whumpee actually reading the fine print.

Caretaker signing papers to adopt legally be Whumpee's caretaker.

[lavenderek]

Why were you disappointed by the Howl's Moving Castle movie? I think I read the book years ago, but I don't remember much about it

i'm gonna critique the gibbly movie and it's my understanding that it's a special movie for a lot of people so if that's you feel free to skip this one

so i was delighted and enchanted by the book, which has only twice to date not made the movie a devastating letdown, so my dear friend sending me this book was pretty much signing a contract in her own blood accepting that i would be cranky about the movie. i'm not really a ghibli person either, like i can appreciate the artistry and value in them, and i'll watch it if the people i'm with really need to watch princess mononoke or whatever, but i just don't go out of my way to watch them. (i like reading meta about spirited away, though.)

i did go out of my way to watch this one because i loved the book so much.

it's important to remember the culture in which the movie was made as opposed to the culture in which the book was made. howl is welsh, if that says anything to you. (his name is howell, and he adopted the name howl to run from himself and seem more magical. i love him and movie howl had none of those elements except for when he told us he was a coward and i was like. ok lol, i'll jot that down because i didn't see it in the text)

so i'm not necessarily surprised by the creative changes they made, but i am confused, because those changes drastically affect the characterization, the character motivations, and the pacing of the story.

(i also was only able to get my hands on the dub and i loathe and detest christian bale as howl lmfao but that's subjective)

so first of all, does movie sophie, like, want anything? she's flawless as a character. even though she has a completely different personality as an old lady than she does as a young lady, there's nothing wrong with her. everybody is fond of her, she's shy, she's gentle, she's beautiful, and she's kind, and her only motivation in the whole movie is this vague desire to cure the curse, but even then she doesn't work on it much at all. her life before howl is about being buffeted around like a leaf in the wind, and her life after howl is about being buffeted around like a cow in a twister. sophie in the movie is a blank slate. she is insecure about her looks (seriously, they couldn't even give her like a crooked nose or something, only doll-faced, thin, pale women over here), and her confessing this and crying about it for about four seconds was the first truly deep emotional response i had seen of her. i cried when she cried, who doesn't grapple with feelings of inadequacy? then the kid came out and she was like, okay, i'm done being upset now :)

second of all, howl is a little eccentric, but mostly he's just a glorious gentleman who has a messy room and one (1) overly dramatic depressive episode. it was disturbing to me as a viewer because it was violent and came out of nowhere, and it never comes back again lmao. it was so bizarre, he's introduced as this suave, debonair man in a cape, and he stays that way the entire movie, except for a weird moment in the middle where he screams at sophie naked and then lists the character flaws that we the viewers have never witnessed. why does he like sophie? why does sophie like him?

why did they turn michael into a child? i just don't see what that added to the story lmao. i get them taking out the complexity of secrets involving sophie's decidedly interchangeable sisters and their mystery beaus, it's a lot to fit into a little movie; but like, why did they turn him into a child though lmao

there's a lot of fatphobia in the movie too.

the change that upset me the most, though, was that the element of sophie having the ability to influence things without her knowledge was totally abandoned. like i said, things just sort of happen to her. in the book, her hats are the most lovely because she's inadvertently cast spells on them to make whoever wears them seem alluring or mysterious to people. the witch curses her because she recognizes these little spells and believes sophie's trying and failing to trick her (and also because sophie snaps at her lmao, why is movie sophie only an asshole when she's old? leave my daughter alone).

book sophie unknowingly protects howl by worrying over his cape (which she previously shredded because she got mad at him, i love her), she unknowingly enchants the scarecrow by helping it stand and complimenting it. she does that the entire book. she also starts the book already feeling sort of dull and trapped, and spends the story trying desperately to solve mysteries and protect loved ones. movie sophie doesn't like, sit around and knit demurely, don't get me wrong; but all the major plot points are things that howl makes happen to her lol.

i think the scarecrow is an excellent representation of book sophie's inner struggles. it's something she inadvertently enchanted, and she doesn't understand it, so she runs from it. she's terrified of the thing. in that way it kind of stands in for her own agency: only when she was forcibly in disguise did she feel free to find out what she wants her life to look like, and that kind of power is foreign and frightening to her. i loved that for her.

and very late in the book, howl reveals that he knew all along she was under a spell, that he tried to get rid of it out of curiosity (book howl doesn't seem to notice that he's just as imperious and nosy as sophie is), but she resisted it. he couldn't get the spell off. so he assumed she wanted to stay that way and let her be about it. so basically it's very huck finn on the raft, she realizes that in running to get away, she was already away. she had that agency all along.

all of that was missing from movie sophie. the idea of her inadvertently hanging on to the curse is still there, we see that she sort of fades back to her young self while she's asleep (not the case in the book, we know this because howl doesn't know what she looks like until she turns back in the end); but she doesn't seem to gain any knowledge about herself because of this. the only time she seems to have any personal drive, it's to learn about and help howl. her inner struggles are about howl. and i hated movie howl lmao, i hated his design and i hated his voice and i hated how like, patronizing he was to everyone around him. book howl was a condescending dick at times and just weird and distant at others, but he never came across like he was absolutely positive he was seducing sophie at any given moment. it was clear that he was the star of the movie and sophie was just the audience stand in to be like 🤩🥸🧐

the scarecrow who is a prince was the most hilariously egregious moment in the entire movie. in the book, the missing prince is introduced as a plot in the beginning and is referenced repeatedly throughout. and he's a major player in the climax. in the movie, it's the last like five minutes of the film and the scarecrow turns into a dapper boy with bread for hair and is like, "you've cured me! i'm a prince who went missing from a nearby kingdom and i was cursed but now i'm free." and i was like NICE, so we just found out there's a nearby kingdom that has a prince who's been missing. love that for us

the book had a lot of themes that i don't often encounter in fantasy novels - themes of female agency, of disguise, and of chaos. the chaos is my favorite part, every chapter is equally chaotic at various levels. you'll have michael fretting over some spell, sophie fretting over her own spell, howl trying to get someone in disguise to fall in love with him, THAT someone pining over michael, and all the while sophie and howl are bickering because she is cleaning (it seems like she cleans to clean up her mind) and he doesnt want her to (he is afraid of change and of reality), and he needs a huge favor of her, and she needs to wheedle out of it, and she promised calcifer she would free him, and calcifer is repeatedly promising to die of not being appreciated enough, and everybody is having three arguments at once. it's like that in every chapter, culminating in the moment howl and sophie realize they're in love, and they stand clasping hands and sort of smiling at each other in the middle of a room full of panicking and perplexed people just yelling over each other lmfao. surrounded by chaos and no longer thrown by it, rooted there in the middle of it, stabilizing each other in a way. i loved that. i actually flipped back a few pages so i could read that moment again.

and it seemed to me that the movie tried to imply that with visual chaos, but everything else was really quite linear and simple. everything was very airy. and since the conflama and the general atmosphere and character dynamics of the book is what made me fall in love with it, the movie didn't work for me.

tumblr user door pointed out that the book and the movie are extremely different and she appreciates them both as separate entities, and she's wise and correct; i knew this and i tried so hard to engage with the movie on its own terms. but i couldn't divorce them in my mind. i felt the same way about ella enchanted and practical magic. i cant stop thinking like, i wish they hadn't gotten rid of x, i wish they hadn't added this weird element of y.

also it was boring. i checked to see how much more was left three times. sorry. i can't express enough how little i cared about the plot with the witch and somebody's secretly evil boss and time traveling to yell at howl or something, because i didn't connect with the characters. and the feathers growing out of howl triggered my weird phobia about things being embedded in skin. i'm skeeved just remembering it.

anyway, yeah. the movie was beautifully animated and whatever atmosphere they were going for was pretty consistent throughout. oh and i LOVED calcifer. he was my favorite in both the book and the movie. in fact, he was the only character in the movie who they didn't really change, he was petty and bitchy in both versions. i loved him. he's like, "SHE FED ME SOMETHING YUCKY" my perfect, horrible boy.

oh and. book sophie was a redhead. that's all.

after i finished the book i tried to draw how imagined them:

couldn't finish it though, i wasn't super jazzed about how it was coming out.

she's sitting in like, a window well altering a coat of his without permission. and he's like, i guess i'll have to wear this one instead, and she's like, i guess you will

[p-artsypants]

Integrity (Part 4)

Ao3 | FF.net

As they claimed their seats, Adrien was aware of dirty looks being thrown in his direction. 

Is this how Marinette felt when Lila lied about her? 

Alya leaned forward in her seat. “Adrien, I’ll talk to some of the girls. I’ll get them to do that critical thinking thing you mentioned. And I’ll try to get Kim to apologize. What he said was just stupid.” 

“Thanks Alya, I appreciate it.” 

Miss Bustier entered the room. “Alright class, let’s get started.” 

“Miss Bustier!” Rose called, putting her hand up. “I think it’s best if Adrien left. Lila shouldn’t have to be in the same room as her abuser!” 

“Abuser? What’s going on?” 

Adrien dropped his head into his hands, exasperated. 

“Adrien touched Lila inappropriately, and when she told Gabriel about it, he fired her!” 

Miss Bustier looked horrified. “Class! This sort of thing is really none of your business! If this did happen, Lila needs to come to talk to me about it in private. I would like to be accommodating, but I find it unfair to deny class to someone without due cause.” 

“There is due cause!” Max yelled. 

“I have heard nothing about this from Lila herself, or Mr. Damocles. Has a restraining order been filed? Has any sort of investigation been launched? I find it extremely hard to believe Adrien would do something like this.” 

“That’s what Gabriel said!” Lila wailed. “He said Adrien was a perfect angel and he’d never do anything wrong! No one’s believed me yet! So why would Mr. Damocles?!” 

There was a knock at the door. 

Miss Bustier held up a finger, asking for a moment of silence, before she went to open it. 

Gabriel Agreste, looking minutely more frazzled than usual, strolled into the room, in person. 

Adrien swallowed and clenched his fists. 

The room was silent and tense. 

“Adrien, may I talk to you out in the hall, in private?” 

Trembling, Adrien answered. “No. You read my note.” 

“There’s nothing for you to be afraid of. Stop being so dramatic.” 

“I think I have every right to be afraid of you.” He whispered, the damn of emotions he had held back all morning just threatening to burst. 

Marinette got up from her seat, only to sit next to him, her arm around his shoulders. 

The action didn’t go unnoticed by anyone. 

Gabriel’s nostrils flared. “Did you tell her?” 

“No.” Technically, not a lie. “I haven’t said anything to anyone. She just...saw I was upset.”

“About what?” Asked Kim. “That you lied about Lila?” 

Gabriel’s steely gaze pierced Kim, forcing him to shut up. “This is none of your business, shut up.” 

Kim swallowed and shrank into his seat. 

“Now,” Gabriel continued, hedging his words. “I need to clear up some of what happened last night. It seems that you have assumed the worst. I don’t want to discuss it in front of your peers. Step into the hall with me.” 

Marinette squeezed his shoulder. 

“No. I don’t want to. I’m not comfortable with that.” 

“I don’t care about comfort right now, Adrien. I care about—“ he bit his tongue, censoring himself. “I care about our family.”

“If you care about our family, then know I’m scared of you.” 

Gabriel exhaled roughly. “You don’t need to be.” 

“The evidence says otherwise.” Adrien spoke softly. “So either say what you need to say, or go. I’m not moving.”

Gabriel ran a hand through his hair, loosing some locks and becoming even more frazzled appearing. “Please?”

Adrien shook his head.

Gabriel rolled his eyes, and considered his words. “I told you I trust you. I’m...sorry, about what happened last night. It wasn’t fair, but I was...paranoid, and frantic. That caused my regrettable actions.” 

“Did you ever find it?” Adrien asked. 

“No. And I don’t think I will. I have reason to believe I’ve been betrayed. So it’s over.” He breathed a long sigh. “There’s no reason for you to stay away.” 

“With all due respect, Father, I need some time to trust you again. And forcing me to come home won’t magically fix that.” 

Gabriel was quiet for a moment, clenching and unclenching his fists. It looked like he wanted to yell, to fight, to grab Adrien by the wrist and drag him out. 

But he did none of those things. 

“You’re a good kid, Adrien. I surmise you’ll be a great man. A better man than I ever was. I’ll give you your space.” He placed Adrien’s phone on the desk. “Just, please text me every once in a while, just so I know you’re safe. Alright?” 

Adrien took it. “I can do that.” 

“I’m sorry it came to this.” It looked like he had more to say, but he hesitated with so many eyes on him. So he just didn’t say anything and headed for the door. 

“Mr. Agreste?” Miss Bustier asked. 

He stopped in the doorway. 

“It seems like there’s a bit of...a catastrophe going on in my class at the moment. I was hoping you could shed some light on the situation?” 

“This is none of your business, Madame. Adrien and I will clear it up.” 

“With all due respect, sir. Lila has already gotten everyone involved. My students seem to want Adrien to leave the class.” 

He turned and looked at her. “What? Whatever for? She’s got nothing to do with this.” 

“Could you explain what Lila said to you yesterday?” 

“Miss Rossi?” Gabriel looked back at her, eyebrows furrowed, and then at Adrien. “Oh. I had forgotten. I didn’t speak to Miss Rossi yesterday. Adrien and I had a long talk about trust. He confided that he wasn’t uncomfortable around her because she touched him in a way he didn’t like, and asked that he not model with her anymore. I made the decision to fire her. I served her severance papers, and one of my managers contacted her. I didn’t talk to her at all.” 

“Mr. Agreste! How can you be so cruel to me?!” Lila shouted, real betrayal in her voice. “You said you trusted me! I could come to you about any problems I had! And I did! Your son molested me, and you fired me instead of believing me! And now you’re acting like it didn’t even happen!” 

“Do you have your severance papers with you?” He asked. 

Lila’s eyes widened. “No, they’re at home with my mother.” 

“I have a copy on my phone. Along with all severance letters we serve, because they are fairly similar in terms and conditions.” He took it out, and pulled it up. “Here, Madame, if you wouldn’t mind reading this.” He handed the phone to Miss Bustier. “Since Miss Rossi wants an audience, I will give her one.”

Miss Bustier studied the screen for a moment. “This looks like a scanned pdf of a letter, signed by Mr. Agreste. It reads as follows: 

“‘Mme. Lila Rossi, 

“I regret to inform you that we have decided to terminate your contract with Gabriel as of today. This decision is based on several conditions, as witnessed and corroborated by several Gabriel employees. These conditions include unprofessional behavior on set, including excessive noise when asked to be quiet, not following instructions, and yelling at other staff; tardiness and unexplained absences, falsified resume, and sexual harassment of another Gabriel employee. As per the terms of your contract, you will receive the allotted amount of your last modeling session, as enclosed with this letter. Please be advised as you apply for further employment, putting Gabriel on the application as a reference will automatically forward this letter of termination to your next employer. If you would like to reapply at Gabriel, you may do so after a two year waiting period. A second termination will result in a complete ban from Gabriel, including all positions of employment and communications with employees. Depending on the severity of your terms of termination, Gabriel reserves the right to seek legal compensation.

“Signed, Gabriel Agreste.” 

“Thank you,” Gabriel took his phone back. “In case you didn’t realize, I work with a lot of models. There are situations where changing happens in front of other people. We take sexual harassment very seriously. Adrien came to me first about this, and so I acted on it. If you want to counter sue and maintain that he’s at fault, feel free to do so. But, if it turns out you’re lying about this, and it goes to court, you’re looking at jail time.” 

Lila swallowed. “I’m not lying. I never lie.” 

“Like the time you lied to get into my house? Sure. I’ll see you in court then.” 

“Wait...” Lila paled. “We don’t need to take this to court. Just bring me back on as a model, and I’ll drop the whole thing.” 

“No.” Gabriel shrugged. “I don’t make any decisions without my lawyer present.” He turned towards the door. “One last thing,” he glanced over his shoulder at Marinette. “Take care of him, Miss Dupain-Cheng. He’s fragile.” And then he left. 

Desperate to not lose this game, Lila started her crocodile tears. “No! It can’t be! I can’t afford a lawyer! There’s no way I’ll win this case! I’ll lose just like all the other girls!” 

“Wait a second,” Mylene spoke up, hope in her voice. “You were just telling us last week that your uncle is one of the top attorneys in Florence! Surely he’ll help you!” 

Oops. 

“Oh...yes, I guess...I had forgotten about that.” 

“I think you’re going to need a good lawyer if you’re going to continue to lie.” Spoke Chloe, standing up. “I’m sorry Miss Bustier, I think we need to clear this up before class even starts, don’t you think?” 

Miss Bustier sighed. “I still maintain that we don’t need to be discussing this, but I know no one is going to be paying attention in class after all of that’s been said.” She walked around the front of her desk, leaning against it with her arms and legs crossed. “This is a very serious issue. This isn’t a courtroom, and I’m not making any judgement calls. If there truly is a problem here between Adrien and Lila, it will be solved in the courtroom.” She narrowed her eyes at her students. “But you all see and talk to each other every day. Rumors and one sided stories are going to spread either way. I’d rather have everyone have the same information and draw their own conclusions to maintain their own relationships. Nothing said here is to leave this classroom. So, let’s talk.” 

Marinette had yet to move from Adrien’s side. And she hadn’t spoken since coming into the classroom. 

Ever since Miracle Queen, Marinette had been disappointed in Chloe. There had seemed to be some hope for her, and yet Hawkmoth’s—or Gabriel’s rather—temptation to get the bee back had just been too strong. 

How many second chances could a girl get? Of course she was going to stand up for Adrien. He was her oldest friend. 

Marinette opted to watch patiently and see just where this went. 

“Lila, we know what Mr. Agreste said and what his timeline was. What happened to you yesterday, if you would share?”

“I don’t know…it’s just so painful.” Lila wiped a tear away. “But, yesterday, after Marinette burned me with her coffee—“ 

“When did that happen?” Miss Bustier asked, patiently. 

“Right after class. You had a meeting and we were all hanging out and talking. Everyone witnessed it.” 

“The coffee was cold, and I tripped.” Marinette defended, exhausted over this plot point.

“Either way,” Lila continued. “I went to the bakery and told Marinette’s mother what she did. She called my mother and told her that I deserved what happened to me!” 

Miss Bustier frowned. “Sabine said that?”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Nino scoffed.

“So then I went to Mr. Agreste.” 

“Why?” Asked Alya. “What prompted that?” 

“W-well at first, I wanted to let Gabriel know what kind of company his son was keeping, but then when I got there, everything spilled out! I confessed that Adrien molested me and he fired me!” 

“So, when did you punch Adrien?” Asked Max. 

“Afterwards! Adrien came home and he tried to grab me and threaten me! I punched him!” 

“What time did that happen?” 

“Right after school.” 

“I was with Marinette until 8 yesterday. You can ask my bodyguard, and her parents.”

“And I have the text you sent me at 6.” Nino held up his phone. “You were still with her then.” 

“Th-then it was after 8!” Lila clarified. “I wasn’t paying attention to time!”

“Okay.” Miss Bustier spoke calmly. “Now, Adrien. What about you?” 

His eyes slid over to Marinette’s for reassurance. 

She squeezed his hand. 

“After the coffee incident, I ran to the locker room to catch up with Marinette. She wasn’t doing well, and I offered to walk her home. Then we noticed an akuma coming after her, so we tried to run. She almost got akumatized, but she fought it off. Then she cried for a while. I stayed and watched out for another akuma. Then, we went to her house just as Lila was leaving. As she passed, she said ‘I’m going to your father next’ while smiling.” 

“That’s not true!” Lila shouted. 

“Lila, Adrien was quiet and patient through your account. You need to let him speak.”

She huffed and fell into her seat.

“I stayed at her house for a while until my father called, telling me to come home. He said that he ‘knew’ Marinette was violent. I knew that he thought that because of Lila. So I confessed that I didn’t feel safe around her, and that he shouldn’t trust her. He allowed me to stay with Marinette for dinner, and then when I came home, we talked more in length about how I felt. Then…things happened…and well. I don’t want to talk about it. But Lila wasn’t at my house when I came home. Last time I saw her was when she was leaving the bakery.”

“Okay,” nodded Miss Bustier. “You’ve both given your side of the story. You’re both accusing the other of inappropriate behavior. One of you is lying. But until you admit it, we’ll never know. But, this moment will shape the perceptions of your classmate’s opinions. I hope everyone sees how dangerous lying and manipulating is. Does anyone have anything they want to say as character testimony?”   

Chloe raised her hand. “Adrikins, I’m going to put you on blast.” She grinned wickedly at him. 

He shrugged, helpless. 

“Adrien Agreste, male model, top student, all around great guy, is desperately, hopelessly, and pathetically in love with one Ladybug.” 

Nino snickered from Adrien’s side. “Oh, we been knew.” 

“Every time Adrien and I talked, he would dissolve into talking about one of three women. A. His mother, of whom he missed dearly and was a saint of a woman. 2. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, of whom he respects and admires. And lastly, and most importantly, Ladybug. He talks about her the most. Ladybug this, Ladybug that. I love—loved Ladybug as much as the next girl but honestly, it was a little annoying. ‘I wonder how soft her hair is. Are her eyes the same bluebell blue without the mask? I wonder how far she could throw me? Do you think we could make it work if we dated?’” She mocked a gagging sound. “Never once did say anything sexual about her. Never did he ever mention Lila. And never has he had any sort of romantic relationship with anyone.” 

There were nods around the classroom, as students agreed with this logic. 

“However. Lila has lied to me, personally. She told me she had a secret code that got Ladybug to come to her when she needed help. It didn’t work, and I almost got akumatized over it. Furthermore, as we have already discussed, it was Lila’s evidence that got Marinette expelled, and Lila’s admission to having some stupid disease that reversed the punishment. Are all of you numb nuts starting to see the pattern here?” 

Nino stood, ready to present his own opinions. “Lila has promised us connections. She’s boasted about people she knows to get us parties, favors, and whatever else we need. But not once has she followed through. And not to mention all the ailments she’s claimed to have.” 

“It’s not fair to pick on someone for being disabled, Nino.” Kim argued back. 

“I’m not. Because she’s not disabled.” He pulled up his tablet. “I started keeping a list of her ailments, so Alya and I could make sure everything we did as a class was inclusive to her.” He raised a brow. “I don’t think Lila keeps track of her own illnesses.” He cleared his throat. “Ahem. Tinnitus in the left ear. Tinnitus in the right ear. Arthritis in the left wrist, arthritis in the right wrist. Ulnar necrosis in the left wrist. Fibromyalgia. Multiple Sclerosis. Cystic fibrosis. Asthma. Glaucoma. Seizures. Vertigo. OCD. ADHD. High blood pressure. Low blood pressure. Heart murmur. Anemia. Allergic to wheat, dairy, gluten, chocolate, soy, nuts, mold, shellfish, corn, cats, dogs, feathers, wool, polyester, and hot peppers.” 

“That’s all correct.” Lila stated cooly. 

“Except you eat pasta for every meal, and you only mention your allergies when someone brings in food, making yourself the center of attention. And you never seem like you’re in any pain unless it’s convenient to get out of an activity. My grandma has MS, and it’s no joke. Also, I double checked with the nurse this morning to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I shared my list with her, and she was really concerned because she didn’t have any of that on your file. She only had one thing written down. Do you know what it was?” 

Lila just stared at him, daring him. 

“Mythomania. Pathological lying. So your lying disease was the only truth you told. I deduce this was put on your file after you told Mr. Damocles.” 

Lila frowned at him. “Nino! I thought we were friends! How could you turn on me and lie like this? I know you and Adrien are friends but—“ 

“But nothing! Lila, you’re not my friend! You don’t listen to me, you don’t remember things I tell you, unless you can twist them to your favor! I mention an artist I like? You suddenly know them. You inspired them. But they’re shy and don’t meet with fans. I mention a movie I like? You were there during production. You know the director. But he’s out of the country on holiday. It’s the same story over and over. What’s my brother’s name?” 

Lila stammered. “It’s...it’s Mark!” 

“It’s Chris, and you’ve babysat him before!” 

“I have short term memory loss!” 

Marinette snapped her fingers. “Nino, make sure to add that to her list of illnesses.” 

“Oh my god.” Alya breathed. 

“What?” 

“That right there. I saw it. Her lying in real time. She didn’t even hesitate, just lied to cover her tracks. She’s been doing that the whole time!” 

“That’s what I’ve been saying.” Marinette stated, calmly. 

“I noticed this not too long ago,” continued Nino. “I assumed she was just exaggerating for attention. A storyteller. It was harmless. But yesterday, when she outed Marinette’s crush, lied about the coffee, and then went to tattle at the bakery? That was too much. I realized her lying wasn’t just telling stories. She was really dangerous. Especially in a time with Akumas.” 

Marinette and Adrien both tried not to smile, hiding the joy that that wasn’t a problem anymore. 

“So what’s it going to be, Lila?” Chloe asked, arms crossed. “Are you going to fess up now? Or are you going to go to court with Mr. Agreste and face jail time?”

Lila’s jaw shifted as she gnawed on her tongue. “Can I speak without being interrupted?”

Chloe scoffed. “Only if you aren’t going to lie your way out of this.” 

Lila narrowed her eyes at her, but didn’t reply. Instead, she explained, “some of my stories are exaggerated.” 

Someone snorted.

“I wanted to be the interesting new girl. I didn’t mean any harm in it. I was just telling you all what you wanted to hear. But apparently this was horrible according to Marinette. She threatened me in the bathroom, and said that she was going to expose me as a liar. I told her that that wasn’t going to happen. But she insisted that the truth was more important to her than friendship. I think it was jealousy. Adrien was being friendly, and Alya interviewed me. Suddenly, all her hard work and generosity didn’t matter, because I was more interesting. She kept up warning me, reprimanding me like I was a child, and trying to humiliate me in front of everyone. I knew the only peace I was going to get would be to get her to leave.”

Alya folded her arms. “So you…fabricated evidence to get her expelled?” 

“To be honest, I just wanted to shake her up, get her to realize what she was messing with was dangerous and unfair. I didn’t know Mr. Damocles was going to expel her.” 

“Shake me up? Is that what you were trying to do when you laid on the floor at the bottom of the stairs and pretended I pushed you down?”

“You wouldn’t back off!” 

“I just wanted you to be honest with people! Lying like you were was going to lead to disappointment! I didn’t want you hurting my friends!”

“That’s a fine excuse. But are you sure you weren’t a little bit jealous?”

Marinette groaned. “Jealous? No. Worried? Yes. I didn’t like the way you were hanging off of Adrien—”

“Oh, like the way you’re hanging off him now?”

Marinette prepared to retort, before Adrien wrapped his arms around her, and hugged her tightly. 

“She’s not hanging off of me,” Adrien explained. “She’s the only thing keeping me steady right now.” 

Nino was quick to squeeze his shoulder in reassurance. 

Marinette hugged Adrien tight, and then continued. “I was worried about the way you were hanging around with Adrien. Like I said, the lies you were telling could only lead to disappointment, like it has with Nino. You might think they’re harmless, but when you constantly let someone down, you do a lot of damage.”

Something about that sentence got Adrien right in the gut. It was just like his father. He was trying hard to save his mother, and thought disappointing Adrien wasn’t a big deal in the long run. But instead, he left lasting damage. Self doubt, trust issues, and hopelessness. Marinette was right. 

“Oh, like you don’t lie and bail on everyone all the time anyways? Do you know how many times I had to pick up babysitting for Alya and Nino because you suddenly ‘forgot’ about some other obligation? Or all the times you gave a flimsy excuse to leave a hang out? Alya told me all about it. You’re hiding something big.”

Miss Bustier spoke up. “This conversation is supposed to be solving what happened between Lila and Adrien, whatever Marinette has to do in her free time has nothing to do with it.” 

“I think it does!” Lila argued. “It’s very hypocritical for Marinette to point her finger at me and call me a liar, when she’s doing the same thing!” 

Miss Bustier frowned. “She has been slacking in her representative duties…” 

Marinette gaped at her. “I thought you were on my side!” 

“I’m staying neutral.” Miss Bustier said firmly. “I think it’s important we get our grievances out so we can have a more wholesome learning environment. It’s up to you to answer. You’re not under oath.”

Marinette frowned. True, she could lie. Though it would be a really sucky time to do so. Furthermore, Hawkmoth was gone, so her identity wasn't as crucial to hide. But she really didn’t want Lila to know, especially after that stunt she pulled with Oni-chan. 

“Whatcha thinking about, Marinette?” Asked Lila, “trying to come up with a convincing lie?” 

“I’m trying to weigh the consequences of telling this truth. Because it’s not just my secret. So therefore, it’s not right to share it. I haven’t done anything wrong, so I don’t think I’ll explain myself.” She shrugged.

“Petty.” Lila bit.

“I think it’s fair.” Alya disagreed. “If it’s something that affects others, she shouldn’t have to share.” 

It affected everyone in Paris actually, not just her and Chat Noir. And so Marinette let out a breath of relief.

“Okay,” stated Alix, trying to clarify what had happened. “So, Marinette knew you were lying, so you ‘accidentally’ got her expelled to get her to leave you alone. But what I don’t understand is why you’re bringing up beef with Adrien all of a sudden. We thought you guys were together, and you modeled together…and then he started dating Kagami. What’s the story there?” 

“I’m not dating Kagami.” Adrien clarified. “I considered it, but…I don’t actually have any feelings for her. I just didn’t know how to say no. But as I said, I told my father I didn’t like the way she was touching me. This had been going on for a while…”

“What prompted you to tell your dad?” Alya asked. 

“Well, after what happened yesterday after class, I walked Marinette home. She had almost gotten akumatized, and I wanted to watch over her. Lila had gone to the bakery and told Sabine her side of the story. She was about to bring down the hammer, but I asked her if she trusted Marinette. That…that made me wonder if my father trusted me. If I could go to him with my problems and he would understand. Lila went to him and told him her side of the story as well, and he called me home. But I asked if he trusted me, and then told him I didn’t like Lila and…well, everything else. We continued the conversation when I got home. I’m assuming that since I actually made a stand, he took it seriously.” 

“Wait wait,” Alya spoke. “Lila, you went to tattle at the bakery, and to Gabriel?”

”I thought Gabriel should know about the kind of friends he’s keeping.” 

Adrien laughed. It wasn’t a funny laugh, it was actually very painful, as he remembered a cutting blow from last night. “Lila spied on me for my father. He used her to find out what was going on in class.”

“Ew.” Nino stated. “That’s super skeevy.” 

“Um, I’m a spy? Why don’t you talk to little miss ‘I followed Adrien and Lila and fished a book out of the trash’?”

Heads swiveled back to Marinette. 

“You should be glad I followed you! Adrien got taken out of school for losing that book! He’d be gone for good if I hadn’t rescued it from the trash! You stole it from him and threw it away!” 

The heads swiveled back to Lila. 

“How was I supposed to know it was important?”

Marinette threw her hands up in the air. “It doesn’t matter! It didn’t belong to you! So don’t throw it away!” 

“You know, I’m glad you brought that day up, Lila. Because that was when I knew you had a lying problem.” 

“You knew she was a liar a long time ago?” Asked Nino. 

“Of course. But I didn’t know she was being malicious. Like you, I thought she might just be lying to get attention. In fact, it worked for a little bit. I thought she really was friends with Ladybug. But then Ladybug herself came up to us and blew that lie out of the water.” 

Lila jutted out her jaw, trembling with anger. 

“Ladybug called her out too?” Asked Alya.

“It makes sense,” Adrien continued. “Why would Ladybug be happy about anyone claiming to be a weakness to her? Alya, you were already targeted a lot just as the leader of the Ladyblog. Of course she’d be pissed about a civilian painting a giant target on their back.” 

Alya gasped, “oh my god! I didn’t even think about that when I posted that interview! Lila, you could have been targeted and hurt! Not just by Akuma, but anyone else who wanted to know Ladybug’s identity!” 

“Well, nothing happened.” Lila shrugged. “Ladybug and Chat Noir would protect me no matter what, anyways!” 

“Yes, like how Chat Noir saved you from Kagami when you ‘twisted your ankle’?” He put in quotes. 

Lila gaped. “How did you know about that?” 

Marinette was wondering the same thing. 

“Chat Noir helped me sneak a bag out of my room last night. Then we talked.” 

“Oh, so now you’re friends with Chat Noir?” Kim scoffed. 

“Not particularly. He helped me out a whole lot last night, but I haven’t spoken to him much before that.” 

“Ugh, you keep mentioning last night like it was the biggest thing that’s ever happened, and yet you refuse to talk about it! Now Chat Noir was there? What else?” 

“Adrien has already stated that whatever happened between him and his father is private and that they don’t want to talk about it.” Miss Bustier reminded, patiently. “If it has nothing to do with Lila, then I don’t think he needs to bring it up.” 

“But isn’t omitting the truth still lying?” Asked Lila. “Both Marinette and Adrien are being dishonest and hiding things, and I find it extremely unfair to be accused of lying if they aren’t telling the truth!” 

“And I think if whatever they’re hiding has nothing to do with you, Lila, it doesn’t need to be brought up.” Said Alya, crossing her arms. 

“Alya! You don’t believe me? What about standing with your fellow woman?” 

Alya frowned. “Okay, Adrien’s been my friend longer than you, and I find it hard to believe he’d do anything wrong. And second, I’m supposed to believe you because we’re both girls?” 

Kim shot to his feet, “As I said previously, men can’t be molested! Especially models! I think you’re just being a coward, Agreste!” 

Adrien hunched his shoulders. 

Seeing the opportunity for a teaching moment, Alix reached over and grabbed Kim’s butt, making him yelp and shuffle away. 

“What the hell was that?!” 

“What? Didn’t like it?” Alix asked with a coy smile. 

“Uh, no? Not from you.”

“Because you aren’t attracted to me?” 

“I mean, yeah?” 

“Now imagine if I was Lila and you’re Adrien.” 

It was like a lightbulb went off above Kim’s head. “Oh.” He turned to look at Adrien. “I get it. I’m so sorry.” 

“While I don’t agree with the method,” Miss Bustier explained, “I’m glad you see what the problem is, Kim. No one should be touched without their permission, no matter how ‘attractive’ the perpetrator is.” 

“Attractiveness is a sliding scale anyways.” Added Alya, “just because some people find Lila and Adrien attractive, doesn’t mean everyone does. And Adrien already mentioned he’s not attracted to Lila.” 

“Yeah, I guess…I just don’t see it. Lila is really pretty!” 

Adrien just shrugged. “She’s just not my type.” He looked to the teacher. “Miss Bustier, I think we’re kind of going around in circles at this point. Can we wrap this up?” 

“Sure. Does anyone have anything else they want to add or need clarification on?”

Everyone shook their heads. 

“Good. I’m sorry to air out dirty laundry, but I really wanted to avoid gossip. Right now, this classroom is your world. When you grow up, scandals and mistakes will be made by all sorts of people. I want to teach you now to do your research and not just blindly follow whatever source you find first. Alright?”

“But we didn’t solve anything.” Rose lamented. 

“Our goal was not to find out who did what to who. It was to bring both sides of the story forward, and allow everyone to consider who they are going to believe versus who they won’t. It’s up to you to decide if you are loyal even when faced with deception. And if you can be open-minded enough to listen to others.”

The room was silent as she let them all milk over that thought. 

“Then let’s get into today’s social studies lesson. I think there’s some practical crossovers between what just happened.”

[flannobrien73]

NA Step working guide - Step 1 Episode 5

Unmanageability

“ The First Step asks us to admit two things: one, that we are powerless over our addiction; and two, that our lives have become unmanageable. Actually, we would be hard pressed to admit one and not the other. Our unmanageability is the outward evidence of our powerlessness. There are two general types of unmanageability: outward unmanageability, the kind that can be seen by others; and inner, or personal, unmanageability. Outward unmanageability is often identified by such things as arrests, job losses, and family problems. Some of our members have been incarcerated. Some have never been able to sustain any kind of relationship for more than a few months. Some of us have been cut off from our families, asked never again to contact them. Inner or personal unmanageability is often identified by unhealthy or untrue belief Systems about ourselves, the world we live in, and the people in our lives. We may believe we're worthless. We may believe that the world revolves around us -not just that it should, but that it does. We may believe that it isn't really our job to take care of ourselves; someone else should do that. We may believe that the responsibilities the average person takes on as a matter of course are just too large a burden for us to bear. We may over or under react to events in our lives. Emotional volatility is often one of the most obvious ways in which we can identify personal unmanageability. “

What does unmanageability mean to me? 

To me, unmanageability means not having the internal tools to deal with the troubles of life.  Having situations that I do not have a clue how to deal with - I cannot manage them, or myself in them.  There was a girl interviewed on TV (a rock star’s daughter who’s name I forget) who was in recovery for heroin addiction.  She said The first time I took heroin was great.  I thought “I can do life now”. That stuck with me.  That’s why we get high.  Because we can’t really do life otherwise.  Of course as she found out, getting high does not constitute doing life.

Have I ever been arrested or had legal trouble as a result of my addiction?

No.  A lot of it was down to luck though. 

Have I ever done anything I could have been arrested for if only I was caught? What have those things been? 

So how honest do I have to be here?  Well, I have to be honest with myself, but in case this blog is ever connected to the physical me who has an address: I’ve done a lot of things that would get me arrested, and one or two things that would get me jail time.  That’s all. Next question.

What trouble have I had at work or school because of my addiction? What trouble have I had with my family as a result of my addiction? 

My mum asked me to remove a carrier bag full of cannabis that I’d hidden at the back of her hat shelf.  She was seriously nice about it, polite even.  I did it right away, politely.

I have lost clients and contracts due to my drinking and acting out.  This was legal but far more detrimental than the story above.

I’ve had a lot of trouble with my own current family.  There’s a trust lost that may never be recovered, especially with my children.

What trouble have I had with my friends as a result of my addiction? 

I’ve lost many friends.  Not because of a falling out or anything, but more because when I was happy I’d get high instead of reaching out and sharing my happiness, and when I was sad I would get high, rather than reaching out for support.  Getting high interfered with my functioning as a social being.

Do I insist on having my own way? What effect has my insistence had on my relationships? 

Oh yes.  Maybe less “having my own way” than simply refusing or being unable to see a point of view other than my own.  I’m having to work really hard on that at the moment.  I do not trust others and often assume that they are trying to get their own way with me. Because I manipulate others, I assume that they are trying to manipulate me, which often they aren’t.  If they are I can’t tell because I assume that about everyone.

Do I consider the needs of others? What effect has my lack of consideration had on my relationships? 

Jeez.  This guide really cuts to the heart of it, doesn’t it.  No, I don’t consider the needs of others.  I was not brought up to see to my own needs and I still don’t - at least I don’t think I do it in a healthy way.  As a result I am blind to the needs of others as well.  I have to be careful about this.  Just because I had a certain upbringing does not excuse me from caring for others and I cannot use this as an excuse.  “My childhood sucked” is very common and is never an excuse.

Do I accept responsibility for my life and my actions?

Hell no!  Actually, let’s be realistic here.  I work very hard to support my family as I am financially responsible for them, so to an extent I do take responsibility.  But when I fail to meet my responsibilities I just “accept the things I cannot change”.  Which is a total get-out.  I think the big difference here is remorse - I am never remorseful about my actions, which a) gives me no impetus for change and b) really hurts those around me as they don’t see that I’m sorry. Which I’m not.  This is one of the reasons I’m reading a lot about narcissism - which is a condition of no-remorse.  Many addicts describe the feeling of remorse after using.  I don’t ever remember that.

 Am I able to carry out my daily responsibilities without becoming overwhelmed? How has this affected my life? 

No.  I feel constantly overwhelmed by almost everything.  This is stressful and also makes me far less effective.  Fight-or-flight is not usually a good strategy for dealing with responsibilities.

Do I fall apart the minute things don't go according to plan? How has this affected my life? 

Yes, I have to say that I do, quite often.  This is weird for me because I always saw myself as someone who would cope with anything.  What I can see now is that I coped by dissociating from the situation.  I can problem solve much more effectively if I absolve myself from responsibility and walk away from the emotional involvement.

The other effect it has had is that it makes me pathologically afraid of planning.  Planning involves taking responsiblity for the outcome, and if the outcome is not as planned I have no way to deal with that except for “It’s not my fault”!  So I avoid planning.  Which is detrimental to my career, finances, and many other things.

Do I treat every challenge as a personal insult? How has this affected my life?

Yes.  It makes me aggressive and highly argumentative.  It also means that I don’t hear what other people are saying.  I saw a great Youtube video on a technique to deal with this yesterday.  I used it this evening when I was talking to my wife about planning, finances and the future - which all scare the hell out of me and usually feel like a personal attack.  It worked really well and TA-DAAAH!!!!

I DID NOT START AN ARGUMENT AND I LISTENED TO HER!!!!!!

I’ll try and find that video again and share it here.

I have to wrap up now.  This step one is seriously meaty.  It’s going to take me a while to get through the whole thing.

Take care or yourselves.  And of others!