#shared mindscape

[tinkrtailrsldrspy]

So... I've got some (miraculously) finished drabbles to share! You can either go read them here on AO3 or you can read below!

Dreams

There are certain places we allow ourselves to be who we are without any restrictions or rules - where we can sing, laugh, cry, rage, allowing ourselves to be our most pure, unfiltered self. The most popular of these places is the one each and every one of us has: Dreams.

Stanford Pines hadn’t told anyone of his, not for many, many years. And especially not now. What was he even supposed to say? ‘Sorry, gang, I just miss my psychotic ex who tried to kill all of you and destroy the Earth so much that I’m dreaming he never died!’

Yeah, that would… not go over well.

So, instead, he found himself going to sleep a tiny bit earlier each night, and staying in bed just a few minutes later each morning. It was good for him, he reasoned! He’d been an insomniac for the vast majority of his life, and he was finally making up for it! So what if he woke up with tears staining his cheeks and even more exhausted than when he went to bed? Probably just a side effect from being unused to being safe enough to get that much sleep.

…

The dreams were nice, though…

~

Bill Cipher, Dream Demon extraordinaire and Master of the Mindscape, was… having trouble with sleeping. He’d had no need for it in nearly a trillion years, so he’d honestly forgotten how to even fall asleep. He’d been going on seventy-two hours of a sleepless binge after first arriving at the Theraprism before good ol’ Ax had been forced to step in and re-program his body to automatically fall asleep when he became too tired.

Was this an inconvenience?

Well, you try falling asleep in the middle of weekly food-fight-therapy (fun for all ages!) and then ask again!

…Ax told him that it would stop as soon as he re-learned how to sleep on his own. But it had been nearly a full year and still Bill couldn’t figure the sleep-thing out.

And wow was he desperate to!

He’d never tell, but his dreams were the only place he got to see his Sixer, the only place he could tell the figment of his subconscious how he’d always felt. The place where he didn’t have to lie because sometimes he got so tired of lying all the time that he needed a place of honesty!

…his mind was good at conjuring Sixer at this point… well, sort of…

This Sixer didn’t hate his guts, and would beg Bill not to go away again, to stay there, with him, please. And Bill, like a sucker, swore each and every time that he’d never leave his precious human ever again. And they’d lay there, completely at peace in each other’s arms.

…

And then Bill would wake up, covered in static-laced tears, cracks burning from the salty liquid getting into them, and utterly heartbroken that it had, once again, not been real. It was ridiculous, he’d whine! He was no longer in control of his Mindscape, but that didn’t mean he needed to see that idiot scientist every single night! There was a lot more trauma Bill’s mind had to pick from, so why always him?!

…

The dreams were nice, though…

~

“I always wanted to show you these stars, y’know,” Bill huffed as he leaned back against Sixer’s chest, wrapping his cartoonish arms around the very human ones that rested across his front plane. Ford had immediately pulled Bill close, this time, needed the physical contact to assure himself of his Muse’s presence.

“Mm… they’re beautiful,” Ford murmured as he took in the sparkling sky. “I can’t imagine what it was like for you - being punished for something you had no control over. Even when I was at my worst, I always had Stanley there - he’d believe me no matter what nonsense I spouted.”

Bill huffed out a soft laugh, nuzzling the hand that was carefully running a thumb under his eye. “I don’t envy you for him, but… yeah - I’ll admit, it would have been nice. Don’t know that I would have been so desperate to prove the stars actually existed to them all, had even a single person believed me.” He hummed in contentment at the soft press of lips to his top angle. “But I have you, now, don’t I? I can show you these things and you just… believe me!”

It was miraculous to him, in a way, and the reverence in his voice showed it. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid to almost throw this all away! To throw away someone who loved him, who thought his flaws charming, who saw him for the first time in his existence…

“Of course I do, Muse,” Ford chuckled as his grip tightened. “You’re my own mind, aren’t you? I wouldn’t lie to myself.”

“Yes, we would,” Bill murmured with a soft regret. “We’ve been doing it for so long now, it’s second nature. I think we just get tired of it, sometimes.”

“…I have, haven’t I?” Ford sighed in quiet understanding. “I really have been lying to myself about- about ‘us’. About what we were, about how I really felt.”

“I was jealous all the time,” Bill muttered with a twinge of guilt. “Even though you were always reassuring me, I was jealous.”

“I knew there was no one else,” Ford closed his eyes, wanting nothing more than to live in this simple moment together. “But that didn’t stop the thoughts from seeping in, when you weren’t there to wash them away…” The two are silent for a time, just watching the stars together, before Ford broke the mournful quiet. “Why couldn’t you have been honest from the start?”

“…honesty doesn’t come easily to me, Fordsy,” Bill admitted in soft regret. “Not after lying to myself for a trillion years. And I’d worked with enough humans to know none of you liked my portal.” He paused at that, turning around in Ford’s grip slowly. “But I should have known better, with you. You were always so much more special.”

Ford huffed out an amused, exasperated breath as Bill’s small hand cupped his cheek. “You always were good with words,” he muttered.

“They were never just words, Sixer,” Bill claimed with gentle insistence. “Because it was never a game, not with you. I wanted you by my side for all eternity, my only equal. But I lost that chance, didn’t I?”

“Yeah,” Ford nodded with a choked-off laugh. “You really did.”

“I should have told you all of it.”

“Yeah, you should have.”

The two looked at each other, grief mixed with regret mixed with anger mixed with an emotion they still refused to name. Pressing his forehead to the top of Bill’s front plane, Ford felt the tears begin to flow once more.

Together, always together, they whispered, “I just wish you were real.”

~

The Axolotl watched the dreams through the haze of soft, pink clouds that made up its realm, smile drifting across their features. They’d been allowing this for months now - found it far too entertaining to stop - and wondered when the two would realize the other was real.

It had been fascinating, the first time it had happened. Across time, across dimensions, two beings who so longed for each other that they managed to merge their own Mindscapes together. And neither realizing it! They would have thought Bill clever and experienced enough to see it, but the Euclidean had become so far removed from his own dream-realm that even such a drastic change hadn’t perturbed him.

Stanford was easier to understand - the human had been living with a Cipher-altered Mindscape for thirty years. At that point, it would have been odder to not have their dreams merged! It was more the fact that he chalked Bill’s revelations up to his own mind trying to give Bill a woeful, understandable backstory that rankled the Axolotl.

No, Bill’s tragic story was all his own.

Well, his and the Axolotl’s.

Every incarnation, every version of themselves, they failed to save the child.

And so every incarnation, every version, made a deal with that child.

The deal wasn’t always the same, however - sometimes it was the promise of a better second life, sometimes it was to become the orphan’s guardian, other times it was merely to be a shoulder to cry on.

This version?

…

“Why didn’t they believe me?”

“Sometimes it is easier to pretend the words of those we love don’t exist, especially when it is dangerous.”

“…I don’t think they loved me…”

“What makes you say that, little one?”

“…they hurt me.”

“Many, many creatures hurt those they love most.”

“Can’t… can’t someone love me without hurting me? I just wanted someone to believe me! I just- …I just wanted to be loved, without having to be someone I’m not.”

“Then I will make a deal with you, young Cipher.”

“Huh? A deal?”

“Yes, a deal. I could not be there to help you when you most needed it, so think of this as a one-time wish. You will live as long as it takes for you to find someone who will love you, Bill Cipher, someone who will find your flaws charming, your stars beautiful, and your gifts divine. Someone with whom you can be your true and total self, no strings attached. How does that sound?”

“…perfect…”

“Then it’s a deal.”

“Deal.”

…

They’d had no idea that by the time Bill found that person… he would no longer know how to be his true and total self. His deal could not be fulfilled without it, and so he’d brought the defeated Euclidean to the Theraprism, in hopes the creature could once more learn what it meant to be himself.

It wasn’t easy, that much was certain, but he’d made remarkable progress since he’d begun sharing a Mindscape with Stanford Pines. The true love that Bill had always wanted, and nearly lost for good.

With a soft, dreamy sigh, the Axolotl settled down to watch another dream play out, wondering just how long it would be until the two figured it out.

[findmeinthefallair]

Mindscape, based on this post I made weeks ago

The yellow light is Flapjack's life force 😭😭😭😭

[intotheelliwoods]

I have one more thing I want to work on before I get back into updating 2AL regularly, but until then......

[crimeronan]

do you think if he was able to that Hunter would ever do the pain sharing spell with Luz whenever she started getting cramps

AW. THIS IS CUTE. yes please.

[beigetiger]

I love these two so much. I could go on fucking RAMBLES about them. My beloveds. They are not escaping the found family beam

[roboyomo]

yk what i have never thought about

what it would be like to actually make azrael and ken interact

[n30b1nary]

gave kain a new outfit as a "sorry you were involved in a car accident that reminded you of how your parents died" apology

dont worry he's fine he only met the murderer of his parents a few hours after this happened ^_^

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

I'm thinkn.. what does ps8 Kuron and Lance's relationship look like after lance wakes up? of course Kuron is Lance's Little Guy TM but also they never really got the chance to truly bond and become friends, and now Kuron is. y'know. being Kuron.. and lance is full of grief and trauma and also The Horrors

i feel like at first its gonna ba at least a little awkward lol

It'll be really fucking awkward for both of them indeed!! But not nearly as awkward. The timeline and the story ideas are not clear but like i feel like there is some shit going on during Lance wakes up and he takes a long time (maybe i'll bring my quintessence ideas for this? Maybe) and when he wakes up he isnt exactly There at first. So like by the time Lance wakes up, Kuron has already had a lot of his character development

And yeah Lance and Kuron is a bit complicated relationship cause like i have said Kuron is grateful for Lance for actually saving him, but also he's a bit angry and most importantly confused cause just why? Why all this? Why now? How did you? What happened to you? And just this confusion that is plaguing since he got his new body.

Meanwhile Lance genuinely cares about Kuron but also is y'know. Busy. Not to mention Lance kinda expected Kuron to be like he was 'used' to be, or rather the rosy eyed version that was Kuron was 'a sweet sensitive guy who can do no wrong and Did Not deserve That' (which isnt wrong but also) (also same with Allura)

But this is something that can be talked out, and it might take some time and development for both of them but by the end i think it's just hugs and a big healing moment for both of them and it would be like a promise to bond and stuff

That being said this isnt exactly final, cause like i said i am still trying to figure out the timeline and story plot and everything so this is very much going to change

[st4rstudent]

Was just feeling inconsolable (/lh/hj) about something (discord update) and seeing your macthinker art instantly made it all better, thank you for the sillies ✨

this is me reaching my hand out to you in times of distress like that one mercy gif

[waitineedaname]

HIIIII how about 14 for Scar, 23 for Mei, and 21 for Greed for the ask game <3

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

I have. never thought about Scar's fashion. hmmm... I think his fashion is pretty practical? but also I love his stupid adidas pants. so I think he's a sportswear kinda guy. tracksuits and clothes he can move around in. but also I love when people draw him in a modern au wearing like, socks and slides. living that single dad life.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

fun fact, Mei has her own folder within my folder of fma manga panels, and her folder alone has 40 images. I love my daughter <3 I have a lot of really silly and really cute ones, but tbh one of my favorites might be this one. this moment is so extremely cool. I love that she takes advantage of Father putting a lot of power into the ground to instead channel that to her own benefit. she's so badass. this panel is titled MOST POWERFUL PRETEEN in my computer

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

THAT SPECIAL GREED FLAVOR OF "POSSESSIVENESS AS A FORM OF AFFECTION." I LOVE HIM. I love writing him claiming people as His and knowing damn well that means a lot to him. just writing from his perspective when he's given something that makes his core go "mine mine mine" or when someone he considers his is threatened. it's so good. I also like writing him and Ling sharing a body, there's so much fun shit to explore when they're in the same head

[felidthing]

PEOPLE LIKE MY SOUL EATER OPINIONS/IDEAS

[dividedsingularity]

"What are you doing." "I'm airing my woes. Now shush and let me dance"

[electronicrobotdreams]

It's not just a photo realistic image. It can be a full on movie, an entire world around me- and I can touch, taste, and smell the apple just as real as I would in this world. When I read fiction stories, I see the characters and the world they're in- often reality is muted by my mindscape if I'm not careful and I'll miss my bus stop if I try to read on the bus- so I set my GPS to vibrate a few stops before so I can come back to this reality. It's a lot like being in a dream- but I'm not asleep. When books I've read are made into movies, it's often disappointing because the version in my mind was so much cooler, or things aren't "right" by comparison. The characters look different, their voices are different, but of course it is as it's made from what someone else imagined. The sad thing is, if I watch the movie adaptation too many times it overwrites the version I use to have and I can't see that anymore. When I write, sometimes I just watch a possible scene play out in my mind. Sometimes I let other scenarios happen, with characters given different motives or responses and see what happens, it's sort of like a simulation? And I write what happens. If I have a writing partner, I experience what they write happens. I full well know it is imaginary mind you, just like a person watching a movie knows it isn't real- but it is an experience. If I want, I can easily change the art style of the apple- I mean, I'm an artist. I mentally have to visualize something to figure out how I want to draw it. I've drawn/painted fruit before, so I've thoroughly studied the reference. When I go to the grocery store and see something I might want to eat, I replay the memory of what it tasted like when I had it before- or imagine what it will taste like. Sometimes experiencing the imaginary flavor will make me realize I don't want it that bad. Or it's going in the cart now, no stopping me. I do this all the time when trying to pick what to eat, imagining the flavor, tasting it in the mind. Does that hit the spot? All senses and sensations can be imagined and experienced in my mindscape. If I couldn't do this, my world would be so empty and dull. It would just be the cold harsh reality. Sometimes I wonder how many people have never experienced their own mindscape. Sometimes I wonder how alone I am in experiencing the world like this. I currently believe there are other creatives like me, be they writers or artists- I'm curious, do you experience the world this way too?

[the-weeping-dawn]

///

[crimeronan]

I have now had my first Princess Luz AU dream. it wasn't very coherent but it WAS very funny. it was, I guess, Gus & Willow meeting Luz & Hunter for the first time (they'd come to the throne room instead of this happening at the owl house, I dunno), and they seemed to trust Luz but be Very Skeptical of Hunter, like Eda at first. and for some reason, the fact that Hunter was wearing his GG mask was treated as a smoking gun for "see he I evil", to Luz's outrage. then he took it off & willow COOED.

gus: look at this guy, lurking by your elbow all masked and mysterious. this is the most evil-coded a guy could possibly be without chuckling to himself and rubbing his hands together

hunter: ugh, FINE. [removes the mask]

willow: oh..... he's BABY..... 🥺🥺🥺

hunter: [PUTS THE MASK BACK ON]

[wooodlandsystem]

It’s very interesting that I struggle to properly talk about myself without gesturing to myself as though I am Talking To Myself. It’s never as affective as it could be if I were to have the conversation like I was looking at myself on one knee going you, your, yours. Guy who is disassociated from his own sense of self no matter how much he tries I just went on a ramble that I accidentally deleted lol. Uhhh whatever no time