#she's learning in jackson but joel is still the one doing do cooking

[be-an-echo]

Merry Christmas guyyyss🎄

[talaok]

can i request a fic with joel miller? where he marks up readers neck with loads of hickeys and tommy and ellie ask about them?

idk whether joel would be embarrassed or proud lol, like ellie would be horrified or bully him depending on his attitude ig

love your blog!! 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

It was a beautiful sunny morning in Jackson, the sun was high up in the sky, the stove was working without any issues for once, and as you stood there, bare feet on the floor tiles, eggs frying in the pan... you took a moment to breathe, to enjoy the silence that spread around you... something so simple, and yet impossible to get as of lately.

And just like clockwork, as always, the moment you were starting to relax, the sound of fast-paced footsteps echoed from the hall, as Ellie came down the stairs at full force.

The day that kid didn't wake up with enough energy to power a whole city was gonna be the day the world came to an end.

You remained turned, as she sprinted through the door.

"Good morning" you smiled, turning your head to give her a brief smile, before getting back to the pan.

"Good morning!" She grinned, slightly out of breath as she sat at the kitchen table 

"did you sleep well?"

"I would have slept better if Joel had stopped snoring so loud the whole night"

You couldn't help but snort 

You loved that man with your whole heart... but she kinda had a point on that.

"Count your blessings" you laughed "At least you don't have to sleep next to him"

"Yeah I have no idea how you do that"

"me either" A soft chuckle left your throat

"so what's for breakfast?" 

"eggs" 

You could physically feel the disappointment take over her body.

"what a surprise" she grumbled "Never had those for breakfast before"

"hey!" you gasped, still inevitably smiling "Eggs are good for you, and you should be thankful I'm even cooking you breakfast, kid"

And although you could hear her sigh, the moment you turned, pan in hand to give her her breakfast, that shit-eating, fake grin she'd learned from Joel was plastered on her face, 

but that was only for a moment, because a second after, the smile, together with any type of joy, pretend or not, left her features.

"what happened to your neck?"

You frowned

"What?"

Her eyes were wide, worried, seemingly scared

"Y-your neck, what happened? Did You get hurt? Did someone hurt you? Does Joel kno-"

And only then, only when his name left her mouth did you realize what had happened, did you realize the mistake you'd made this morning.

"No Ellie" you shook your head, putting the pan down to place a gentle hand on her arm "It's... it's nothing, don't worry"

She shoved your hand away with a quick move as she argued

"What do you mean don't worry, your whole neck's red y/n! What happened?!"

"Nothing Ellie, I promise" A soft laugh threatened to spill from your lips as you tried to calm her down, but the girl resisted as she stood up suddenly, the chair screeching at the movement

"Why don't you wanna tell me what happened? I'm not a kid, I wanna know who did this to you!"

"Ellie, I-"

And just then, heavy footsteps entered the room.

"What's with all the screaming?"

Joel's disheveled self had joined the party, looking every bit of tired as he was.

He passed a hand through his messy hair, groaning lowly before his gaze settled on you and then on Ellie.

Ellie scoffed as her eyes widened even more

"Are you serious!?" she almost shouted, clearly done with the both of you "Are you blind? Something obviously happened to y/n e she doesn't wanna tell me what it is!"

You watched as every bit of sleep left his body, now tense and alert as he always was when danger was near

"What happened to you?"

But before Ellie could intervene and get even madder, you shut them both off as you rolled your eyes at Joel.

"My neck Joel" you explained, raising your brows "Ellie wants to know what happened to my neck, and since it's your doing... I'm gonna let you handle this"

And with one simple sentence, both their attitudes had changed 

You watched as the realization hit Joel, and then a moment later as the other realization hit

Your neck.

your neck was red and bruised,

and he knew why

Of course he knew why... he was why

"what do you mean it's his doing-"

Ellie's face was creased in puzzlement, but all you did was turn to Joel, waiting for him to dig himself out of the grave he'd dug.

"Ellie- I-" a heavy sigh fled his mouth as he shot you a -why do I have to do this- look, although he knew damn well why... mr "just one more".

"what, what happened?"

He cleared his throat, clearly struggling to hold the kid's gaze

"Well, Ellie" you didn't miss the way his voice cracked the tiniest bit in the middle "Y/n's neck is red because..." his expecting eyes traveled to you again

"Because?" Ellie asked, impatient.

"because well, Ellie when..." you watched his Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed the sand in his mouth 

Funny how you'd seen this man do things that would make the average man piss his pants, without a hint of dread, and this was the most you'd seen him scared.

"Well, it's that... when-" he cleared his throat again, as his hand went to scratch the inexistent itch at the back of his neck "when- uhm- two adults love each other very much they... well they do-"

And thanks to some god somewhere Ellie stopped him before he could end the sentence

"Oh my god-stop!" she moaned, looking ready to throw up"I know what sex is Joel!"she gagged, looking between you two "So is-is that why your neck's..."

You only needed to give her a slight nod before another agonizing groan left her mouth "Oh my god-" her face contorted into a frown "that's - disgusting, you didn't have to tell me that!"

"You said you wanted to"

"yeah well I take it back!"

And even though you tried to stop her, calling for her, she had bolted out of the room before you could do anything, bumping into a figure as she did.

"woh" Tommy breathed, frowning as the kid flew past him, having let himself into your home once again

"what happened? Why is Ellie-" he asked, his brows pulled together in puzzlement, before they creased even more "Wait what happened to your neck?"

You couldn't help but chuckle softly 

"That's what happened to Ellie" you breathed, still smiling "Your brother got a little too carried away last night"

You watched Joel roll his eyes as Tommy laughed like that was the funniest thing he'd heard in days

"'s that right?" he joked, throwing his brother a smug grin "And you tried explaining her just now, didn't you?"

"yeah" Joel grunted, waiting before Tommy inevitably laughed again, this time even going as far as throwing his head back.

"it ain't that funny" he argued, sighing loudly as he walked to you

"No, no you're right, You explainin' to a little girl about sex ain't funny at all" he snorted, laughing even louder somehow.

The moment he finished his little scene, you were both looking at him annoyedly, although a spark of amusement still ignited your eyes.

"alright, alright, I'll go talk to her" he held his hands up in defeat, "just leave me some of those eggs, 'm hungry" 

And that's all he said, before he was out of the room, leaving you and Joel alone

"Just one more huh?" you smiled, looking up at him, "my whole neck's red"

"why didn't you cover it?" he asked, which, to be honest, was a legitimate question, you always did cover it whenever something like this happened... which were more times than you liked to admit.

"Ah so now's my fault?" you cocked an eyebrow

"c'mon now, sweetheart, you mark me too" he argued

"yeah but where no one can see, baby"

And at that a lascivious smirk appeared on his lips as he gripped your waist "mmmh what can I do?" he breathed, his mouth hovering over your lips just to get lower to the reddened skin of your neck "i just can't help myself when I see this pretty neck"

And then once again, he was kissing it, softly starting to focus more just underneath your left ear

"Joel..." you whimpered

"what?"

"are you serious?" you chuckled, clinging to his arms 

"one more can't hurt at this point darlin'..."

[angelkissiies]

Ellie casual dominance pls 😭🙏

casual dominance with ellie williams

mild content below the cut

╰╮ thank you anon for the request !

she is so bossy with you and sometimes it annoys the shit out of you, but mainly you know how much she wants to protect you. her overbearing need to control situations stems from a yearning to keep you out of harms way. so going out with her (or anyone else) on patrol usually begins with her giving you an exact rundown on what need to happen and when you need to be back- if anything even seems to not go to plan she gets nervous, waiting at the gate for you to get back. 

“fuck, there you are. what happened to the plan? it’s been an hour, are you okay?” she rushed, turning your face in her hands as she looked for any sign of damage. 

you nodded, cupping her hand with your own as you attempted to calm her. “horses got tired halfway through, they needed a rest. im okay, babe.” 

 never let’s you cook for yourself. the girl could be black and blue with three broken ribs and would still actively fight you to make sure you didn’t cook. it was like a love language she developed after living with joel for so long. it was her way of showing you she loved you wordlessly. she wouldn’t even let you serve yourself the food, smacking your fingers gently when you tried. 

“ah!” she huffed, wooden spoon coming down light on your wandering hands as you attempted to get the plates from the cabinet. “sit down, babe. let me do it.”

you always sighed and begrudgingly sat down at the table, watching as she limped around the kitchen determined to continue her duty as ‘chef’ 

 she always demands to sleep closest to the door, saying that she wants to be able to protect you if someone ever breaks in. you tried over and over to tell her that it almost never happens in jackson, but she’s quick to shush you. 

“when was the last time there was a break in here?” you asked, settling in on the far side of the bed as she triple checked that the door was locked. 

“never but who knows? maybe the infected learned how to pick locks?” she responded jokingly, still not letting up. 

 hovers during parties, keeping an arm around you constantly. she won’t let you get an arms length away, making sure you don’t get into trouble as dina keeps feeding you drinks. 

“ah, come back here.” She hummed, pulling you back into her chest as you attempted to wander off after dina. You were properly wasted, having one too during your hours of dancing around between the two girls. 

“but dinaaaaaa-“ you drew out, pointing towards the girl as she pulled jesse onto the floor. 

“not tonight, babe.” 

 doesn’t let anyone, and I mean anyone, raise their voice at you. she doesn’t care how much trouble she gets into, she will not allow anyone to speak to you in a way she knows you don’t deserve. Hell, when you did deserve it- she’d rather die than allow you to take that. 

“You need to know better than that, (y/n)!” 

“Hey! Don’t fucking talk to her like that.” 

“But she-“ 

“Yeah I don’t fucking care.” 

constantly is wearing an extra jacket to give you when it gets cold, she is a firm believer in chivalry. if she even thinks you might be cold, she’s shedding a layer and forcing you into it before you can even argue. 

you trembled slightly as the wind picked up, flinching as you felt Ellie’s hands land on you. “Els, wha-,”

She draped the heavy jacket over your shoulders, moving to stuff your arms into the sleeves before zipping it up. “There! Warm?” 

All you can do is smile at her, shaking off the chill. 

[creedslove]

hii!! i have an idea for a headcanon (i dunno if you’re still doing them prob not) but of post! outbreak joel. him, ellie, and reader living in jackson and how the two meet and how they come together as a little family?

Post outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

A/N: I'm usually more of a no outbreak AU Joel but I loved this idea very much anon 🥺

You met Joel pretty much like everyone else did in Jackson: by knowing he was Tommy's older brother and listening to several stories of his terrible, ruthless past

Which didn't bother you at all because as you lived in the fucking apocalipse not many things fazed you and you knew surviving took a lot of questionable actions and sometimes people just had to do what they had to do

He very much kept to himself, contrary to the young girl that always tagged along with him, who didn't shut up one second and always seemed impressed or excited about something

You couldn't lie, you thought that was very sweet

But you didn't understand how father and daughter could be so different: she was a chatty box and he mostly just groaned and grunted or hummed in approval

And then you learned they weren't father and daughter, because the two of them were very quick to state that, though it was also sweet that everyone saw they were father and daughter regardless of what they said

Ellie - you'd learned her name - was very sweet despite her sailor's mouth and you two often got along once you began teaching her how to bake; it was just a simple, ordinary story, you lived on the same street in Jackson and one day she happened to pass by right when you were baking cookies and the smell of it just drove Ellie insane

To the point she had no shame in knocking on your door and asking you what was that you were making and then she tried your cookies and she was doomed, because from that moment on she would do anything she could in order to eat some of those delicious treats

She told you she was tired of eating Joel's shitty food and you sort of scolded her because you knew he did his best, but if she didn't like it she could learn how to make her own

Ellie told you she didn't exactly know how, so you offered to help her and teach her how to cook and bake as much as she would like

Joel didn't resist it because he knew she would be busy and safe during the day and also because he would be the one testing her new food and recipe, which he didn't oppose

Your official meeting was when Ellie had already had a few classes and she asked if she could use your kitchen to make dinner and invite Joel to see if he would actually approve it or not

But in fact it was a lie, she had just noticed how he stared at you and how you blushed whenever he talked to you, so she figured if you two were too dumb to get to know each other, she would have to give you two some help

But it worked, after having dinner at yours, Joel enjoyed it so much he kept making up excuses to come back and before you could realize, you and Joel were in a relationship together

Things were getting more and more serious and you loved him more and more each passing day, and the same for Joel, for a man who thought he wouldn't be able to love again, there he was: madly in love with you

So it was just logical you would move in together

And while Joel was out working around down or in patrols, you were very often taking care of the house

You and Ellie became baking buddies and every single day there's something fresh and sweet at home for your handsome boyfriend

You and Ellie got so good at it you started baking goodies to sell in the neighborhood or exchange for favors and products, making it a nice income for the two of you

Joel finally had a family and a home in a world he first thought it wasn't worth living in, he was still a deeply scarred man and he would probably never get rid of his demons but you and the little family you formed made everything better for him 💗

____

[cliickermiller]

Could I request a Joelxreader where the reader moves to Jackson and is super sweet and loves to bake things for everyone in town as a thank you for allowing her in and at first Joel rejects their offerings because they’re suspicious of them which makes the reader continue to try and bake things for him, finally he accepts and starts opening up to them and offering to help reader with any labor they need done which leads to them sharing a kiss and maybe starting a relationship

mean spirits and bread cakes - Joel Miller x Reader

A/n: Woohoo first request, I was a little hesitant at first because I want to make sure my requests are written like my stories, with feeling and detail and I hope I accomplished that by the end of this story so just let me know how i did :)

Whenever you were brought into Jackson you were met with guns in your face, mainly by two men but one of them was a lot more lenient with you staying there, You believed that his name was Tommy, he welcomed you after the initial questions and tests and set you up with you own little room, it wasn't big or much but he said it was temporary until another unit opened up. For now you made due, using your time mainly in the kitchen helping the others prep meals for the town and other things, once Tommy helped move you into your new home, which just needed repaired, you quickly made to work making a little farming area outside.

It had been a couple weeks since you finally got your own home, you hadn't really baked since you moved in, trying to help the others out as much as you could, while still maintaining your food source in your backyard. Over the weeks you had met somebody named Joel, who you learned was the other man holding the gun in your face. He was closed off, at least to you, you always say him talking with Tommy and laughing with a teenage girl who you assumed was his daughter. You learned later that her name was Ellie, she was sweet and always came over first thing in the morning to help you bake for the other residents of Jackson, props she didn't really help baking but she watched you and learned how to do it while keeping you company and being a taste tester for you different treats.

"Y/nnnn! What're we bakin today?" Ellie cheered walking into your kitchen smiling brightly "We are making a strawberry bread cake with freshly grown ingredients and I finally made the perfect flour substitute so now maybe your grump of a father will accept them" You proudly stated smiling at the girl, watching as she giggled loudly "Joel is-.." She stopped, what was Joel to her? A father? A father figure? or just some guy who takes care of her? "Yea..yea Joel is a tough cookie to crack" She smiled using your phrasing from the other day "Alright, now, let's get started on mixing dry ingredients, I wanna make sure all these cakes are done by the time the patrols get back" You smiled watching as she took her usual seat on the counter next to your sink to watch you bake. You house was nice, you could tell whoever built it and the other houses knew what they were doing, you never thought you'd live with water or electric again but whenever you found Jackson that was the first thing you noticed.

After almost six hours of baking you were done, you liked doing it though, it gave you time to talk with Ellie, the first child you spoke with since the fall, and considering you were a middle school teacher it pained you seeing all the kids that turned infected; plus it helped feed the community, you weren't taking out of their found resources either, you grew it all and happily contributed it throughout the town, it was the only real way you knew how to pay them back for letting you stay, there weren't many kids, you weren't physically capable of going and fighting clickers like the others, so you stuck with helping them build/setup new cabins and cook little treats for everybody. Ellie filled the time with telling you the story of how she met Joel and how she wishes he was actually her father, how she always longed to have an adult go out their way to protect her, so she didn't have to learn at such a young age. You felt bad for her, Ellie was a sweet but stubborn girl, she reminded you of your younger sister. "Well....I'm happy you've made to here, Ellie, And I'm glad through your journey you found somebody like Joel..He sounds like an amazing man" You smiled placing the small cakes into separate containers, Deep down you know Joel had to of had someone before Ellie that he cared about that much, considering this was the first group of men you found that weren't ravaging assholes and that fact he went across the country and only kept Ellie's best interest in mind really showed his true colors.

Ellie shrugged a bit shoving some containers into her bookbag ready to help you pass them out, "I guess I kinda owe it to him? He helped me get this far I probably would've died by now" She mumbled, you offered her a kind smile wrapping an arm around hers to lead her outside to start your rounds. It probably took another hour to hand them out and you and Ellie still have 4 more containers together to pass out, splitting down the main road you stopped at the house you knew would be a problem, you didn't know why you still tried giving things to Joel, he always declined and acted like you were carrying the next world ruining virus and were ready to kill all. Looking up on the porch you saw him sitting in a rocking chair with his guitar propped on his lap "Hi.." You mumbled slowly stepping up on the porch "What're you doing here, y/n?" He grumbled, you frowned "I uh..-um.." You were stuttering, after hearing Ellie's stories about him you felt nervous under his watch, flustered. "Spit it out. I gotta start lookin for Ellie soon" He huffed sitting up straighter "Oh! E-Ellie she helped out today again..I wanted to drop off a strawberry- uh- bread cake" You stuttered watching him furrow his eyebrows "Don't you know flower started this entire damn mess?" He snapped standing up "N-No! I uh, I've been finding other things, not containing wheat t-to make a substitute for the flour.." You rambled, a little worried by the tone and body language, He looked around, catching eye of Ellie talking to Tommy stealing a piece from his food container and walking towards the cabin. "I don't want it" He huffed before going back inside, leaving you on the porch alone, you huffed, not letting his mean spirit get you down to happily pranced to Ellie "I'll see you later alright, hun? You need anything you know where to find me"

You woke up the next morning to Ellie pounding on your bedroom door, what the fuck? Getting up in a rush you swung the door open looking at her "You weren't awake whenever I knocked on the door and I got worried you left in the night a-and when the door was locked I-I thought you got infected or died" She rambled before hugging you tightly, you hugged her back tired and confused, the moment that really woke you up was Joel standing in your hallway peeking through the doorway "S-Sorry..Whenever you didn't answer I got Joel..." she whispered "N-no hun that's okay, no reason to be sorry, you were worried" You said rubbing her back before pulling away wrapping the blanket you had around your body before leading them both back out to your living room. "Ellie...you gotta help Maria today..better get on that" Joel said lowly, motioning her out of the cabin before closing your door sighing. "She cares about you" He said finally, turning around to look at you, you still had horriendous bed head and you looked like you just climbed out from under a rock (In your defense it was the best sleep you've ever had)

"I care about her..She's a sweet girl..one of the only people left her age that actually care about what's left in humanity" You whispered calmly going to the kitchen to get a bottle of water "She's cared about a lot of people..most em have died..so..whenever she cares about...un-infected she cares alot" Joel said, you nodded understanding what he was saying "I've noticed..I've seen kids deal with loss and grief...most grow resentment towards others..-" Joel cut you off "-But she's different" You agreed with him picking at your covers "Tried that..damn..strawberry? what the fuck did you call it?" He asked running a hand over his facial scruff "Strawberry bread cake" You whispered trying not to crack a smile, he sat down on the edge of your coffee table sighing "it was good..real good..Was kickin myself most of the night for not trying it sooner" He chuckled embarrassed rubbing the back of his neck "Ellie made you try it didn't she?" You chuckled watching him huff "Damnit she's right you can read people like a damn book" He grumbled before readjusting his sitting position "If..If you keep bringin them little cakes and other things over..I'll be happy to take em..." He smiled softly, You smiled back at him, maybe all Joel needed was an okay from Ellie to be friendly "Mmm..I dunno..I might need compensation now" You teased playfully, Joel laughed shaking his head a bit "How bout this..whenever I'm not on patrols..any hard labor you need done..I'm there" He offered, you smiled nodding "Sounds like a pretty good deal to me" you smiled softly, he smiled looking at you "Ellie..told me about how you guys met..and how you saved her..gotta admit Joel..You are one hell of a man" You smiled softly, he coughed a bit looking down now flustered, you giggled a bit resting a hand on his knee "I'm serious..alot of other men...sadly probably wouldn't of ever left your old QZ with her..you a good man" You whispered, nudging his knee a bit with your hand.

That night would start a landfill of good nights with Joel and Ellie, leading you to one night imparticular. You were standing on Joel's porch, waiting for him to answer the door "Hellooo?" You called sighing softly, almost then the door opened and there stood Joel in a towel with wet hair, panting like he rushed to the door "S-Sorry I can come back another time" You whispered nervously, he ran a hand through his hair "N-No just got a bit worried thinking something bad happened" He said smiling at you in relief "N-No I was gonna see if you were still coming over?...That broken window is bringing in a cold chill" You whispered nervously "oh! oh yea of course, let me...get dressed, come in" He said pulling you inside of his cabin gently before disappearing into his bedroom. You wandered, peeking into his kitchen "Mr. Miller! are you getting a second helping from me after Ellie gives you one?" You called seeing the extra containers in his sink "Totally not! I'm a good man remember?" He asked as he walked out, now dressed with his hair now maintained and under control. "Mmm You can be a good man and still be taking extras" You giggled as he walked closer to you standing by the sink, You didn't realize till now how close the two of you actually were until then, you could feel his breath on your face, not that you were complaining, somehow the man still had minty smelling breath in the end of mankind. "You gonna charge me extra for it?" He asked raising an eyebrow, you looked at him tightening your lips into a pursed line before resting a hand on his shoulder "Maybe...or maybe we could work out a deal?" You teased, trying to keep an upset face, Joel gasped playfully before chuckling "Gonna charge me extra? My little girl is the one who helps pass em out" He laughed leaning closer to you "Oh! So you're taking Ellie's serving" You teased giggling louder, he placed his hands on your waist, causing both of your giggles and chuckles subdue leaving you looking at each other. Joel couldn't help it, After losing Sara's mom, he was convinced he'd never meet anybody as amazing as her, as sweet or kind and yet here you were, and you were breathtaking.

"Joel.." Your voice pulled him out of his thoughts, he cleared his throat placing a hand on your cheek before kissing you, if it were anybody else you would've pulled away, knocked the dude the hell out for kissing you, but instead you kissed him back, running your hands through his damp hair, he moved his hands back down to your waist picking you up and putting you up on the counter. "How bout..you..start usin my kitchen..give me a chance to see ya everyday" He panted looking at you "Then we don't gotta do the walkin to each others houses and knockin" He continued as you pecked his lips gently "Are you asking me to move in with you sir?" you teased smiling resting your hands on his shoulder "Maybe I am.." He whispered, both of you jumped as the door slammed and Ellie cheered loudly "FUCKING FINALLY!" She yelled jumping up and down in excitement towards her bedroom.

---

soooo how'd i do?

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender Extras

Hi all!

So I still don't have power but I figured I'd use some precious battery to share some of this stuff with you since it's been almost a week since Lavender ended and dang it I'm bored.

Here are some things that I considered writing/are truths in my head within the universe but didn't make the cut for whatever reason.

Sylvie's full name is Sylvia Bethany Miller. Bethany is for the girl Doc had to euthanize in chapter 12 so she's still remembered.

Ellie stayed living at home in her room until Sylvie was old enough to start school. Eventually, she and Dina move in together. The set up with Jesse is very similar to Mark Sloane with Callie and Arizona from Grey's Anatomy. Doc considers Dina and Jesse additional children.

Ellie teaches her cousin Lizzy to play guitar. It's adorable.

Doc teaches Ellie how to cook. Ellie uses it to romance Dina. She all but shoves Joel, Doc and Sylvie out of the house to make dinner for Dina after getting thorough written instructions from Doc on how to make everything. This, too, is adorable.

Andrew's friend Steve was totally the fun uncle to Lizzy and Jonah back in Boston. His smuggling contacts quickly learned to bring him both pot and children's books or toys.

Jess set up a little counseling practice in Jackson. She loves it.

Joel tried to teach Doc guitar. She is tone deaf. It was bad. She smiles and listens to Joel play and they both agree that this is the better outcome.

After a few years, the fact that Doc and Tommy used to date becomes a bit of a family joke. Joel, Ellie and Maria think it's hilarious. Doc kinda rolls her eyes a bit but laughs along. Tommy begs for mercy. Ellie thinks all of this is fabulous.

Doc was certain that no one besides Andrew and his family would miss her in the QZ but she was wrong. It turns out, a lot of people noticed when she left. Since no one besides Andrew and Jess knew what happened, a few FEDRA people had to deal with some angry patients, students and acquaintances of hers demanding answers since everyone assumed FEDRA did something fucky. Her whole "I think we're just here to love people so that's what I'm doing" thing ended up standing out to a lot of folks in the QZ.

When Sylvie is about 10, things are under control enough outside the walls of Jackson to go camping. Joel, Doc, Sylvie, Ellie, Dina and JJ all go. Joel brings his guitar, Doc makes marshmallows and graham crackers so everyone can have s'mores. There's a bonfire and ghost stories. Ellie likes sleeping outside. Everyone's happy.

[j3zelle]

Summary: You and Ellie are just getting by, pushing yourselves to the limit as you finally find what it was you were looking for.

Warnings: NSFW WARNING ! MINORS DNI ! cursing, blood mention, animal death, oral sex r!receiving, fingering r!receiving.

Word Count: 6338

A/N: I know what you guys are thinking... "OMG??? ITS FINALLLY HERE???" I know bitches, it's time, strap yourselves in! (Also I finished writing this at 11:30 at night, so sorry if there are any writing mistakes, but hey, apparently the freaks do come out at night... Enjoy!)

Benevolence: Part 5

You awoke the next morning to the smell of mud and dew. It was a pleasant smell, one you missed a lot since you left Jackson. You missed gardening in the greenhouses, the smell of freshly cooked bacon and steak. The feeling of your own bed underneath you. Even if it was a life you didn’t imagine living, you were grateful for it.

You open your eyes slowly, looking up through the trees as the very early morning sun rays spill through the leaves and branches, creating a burn yellow glow. You soaked up the sun like a small, budding flower. As you do this, you feel movement beside you. Turning, Ellie was beside you, reading that survivor's book. Her heavy sweat jacket made a makeshift pillow as she laid on her back, looking down at the book as it laid on her chest.

“Morning.” You whisper softly to her. “Doing some light reading?” She looks over to you, smiling at your words before she closes the book on her finger, keeping her page safe from the clutches of the unknown.

“Only a little. I was trying to see who those people were, maybe they were part of the same group.”

“Why would they separate?”

“To find Joel. Scout ahead. Who knows at this point?” Ellie sits up, looking over to her bag that was beside her before opening it and placing the book back into it. “However, I did learn something new.”

“And that was?” Ellie doesn’t answer yet, she simply places a small apple in the hand you had laying on your chest. You sit up slowly, careful to not hurt your arm, and take a bite out of it. It was tarty and a bit squishy, but you didn’t mind that much.

“They call themselves the Washington Liberation Front. Their base is in Seattle.”

“Okay.”

“Where do you think they would take Jesse?” She questions, and you shrug.

“Not back to Seattle, if they are still here. But, again, how do we know these are the same people?”

“That girl in the building, she mentioned the man that led them, named Isaac. The same name was mentioned in the diary.” Ellie grips onto her pinky and ring finger on her left hand, just like she always does. “They also mentioned looking for Joel and Jackson.”

“Did they mention why they were looking for him?” You ask, taking another bite out of the apple. Ellie looks away, digging into her bag one last time and pulling out the bandages. Without her asking, you turned your body completely so your right arm was facing her. She turned around, her eyes wide. She likely didn’t expect you to read her mind. You giggled softly as you bit into the apple once more, and she just shook her head.

“They didn’t mention it.” She responds, taking off the bloody bandages from your arm carefully, and wrapping new ones around it. You wince softly, looking up into her eyes as she works. 

“That’s odd.”

“All I know is that if Jesse isn’t in Seattle now, he will be soon. We have to find him before he is off the map for good.”

“You mean… going to Seattle?” 

“If you're willing to go that far.”

“I’m more than willing.”

Three Months Later

The weeks turned into months as you and Ellie were on the road. It was long and hard, but you and her managed it. A lot of nights, you had to go without eating, but thankfully, Ellie was great with a bow. Every few nights that go by, she would hunt down a rabbit the both of you would share. She would even tell you stories about the times she spent in Jackson with Jesse and Dina, before you came yourself only a year or so ago. 

After a while of traveling with the horses, yours ended up dying in the night from hunger. You felt terrible, as you were so worried about yourself and Ellie, not what the horses ate. You gave them what little food you could spare, but there was nothing you two could do about it. Ellie let Shimmer go that same morning, hoping she would fend better in the wild than with you two. You just couldn’t salvage the extra food for them. It broke her heart, letting her go, but you told her it was the best thing to do, and reminded her that it would’ve been better letting her go to live a better life than watch her die a few nights later. She knew you were right, and as she watched her leave, she took hold of your hand. You two have been on foot since then, trekking along as far as you could go until you basically collapsed to the grassy floor every night.

You thought with all this traveling, you and her would get closer. And that is exactly what happened. There were times where she would warm up to you and get to share a lot with you. Even times where you would find yourselves enveloped in each other in kisses, the ones you thought only happened on those terrible 90’s movies the adults showed everyone on movie nights. But, you noticed something always made her pull away, as if she regretted it. It was driving you insane, the fact she changed her personality so much. It was nothing like she usually acted, like in Jackson. She was still herself but it was like something pulled her out of it.

Whenever you mentioned it or brought it up, she changed the subject quickly. It worried you more than you would like to admit, and sometimes she noticed.

When she would change the subject, she often brought up your new scar and how it looked a lot like the one she used to have before she covered it up with her tattoo. You took it as a compliment most of the time, because you actually loved your new scar. The healing was a pain and you wish you didn’t get hurt from the beginning, but at least it looked cool now.

With the weather getting warmer, Ellie ripped her long sleeve denim jacket into a t-shirt, showing off her beautiful toned muscles. She only caught you staring once, so you are training yourself to look away as soon as she feels your eyes on her. You weren’t staring that much, but you couldn’t deny when she was sweating in the sun, and the way it beaded on her skin, it was hard to look away. 

“Alright, according to this map, there should be an old hotel down the road. We can hole up there for the night.” Ellie speaks, looking over to you. You were kneeling down in a small area of grass, picking at a patch of lemongrass. With the warmer weather came more food to eat, and although lemongrass didn’t have the most pleasant taste, it was better than nothing. You pick a handful, placing them in your bag before you stand back up and walk over to her.

“What did you just grab?” “Lemongrass.”

“Again?” Ellie groans, folding up the map of Seattle she found on a dead survivor's body. They were also part of the Washington Liberation Front, the body had a patch on it saying so.

“You want to starve?” You ask her, moving to her side.

“It’s not my plan, no.”

“Then we are eating lemongrass for dinner.”

“We can’t even eat it! We just suck on the strands.” She replies, beginning to walk away. The sun was a bit brighter now, but with the towering buildings above you, the shadows cast on the two of you well enough to block the sun's harsh rays. You traveled a lot before, but Seattle was something different, especially since nature took over all the buildings and made them seem like they were trying to camouflage.

“So, we’re heading to a hotel?”

“Yeah, apparently it's a small meeting place for the WLF. Maybe there are some people there we can talk to, get some more information out of anyone we can.” “Maybe even find Jesse?”

“Exactly what I thought. If they were smart, they wouldn’t lead us all the way back to their base. No, they’d keep him in a spot only those they trusted knew about. So, this is our best lead so far.”

“Sounds like a lot of nothing for just information. Jesse isn’t the kind of guy to kidnap to get information out of. He’s not like Tommy or Maria, those are people they would want for information.”

“Yeah, but they are also one of the strongest in Jackson. They wouldn’t do that. They’d grab someone alone, vulnerable.”

You smile, shaking your head. “Then Jesse isn’t the one. He’s older than you and me, he knows what he is doing. He knows how to take care of himself. Hell, I’d be surprised if he was tied up when we found him. He has a thing for getting out of sticky situations.”

Ellie looks back at you, shrugging. “Of course, but we can’t let them know that, can we?”

More walking with the only change being the sun going down. Your legs were beginning to itch and the balls of your feet were sore. You wanted to tap Ellie’s shoulder and ask her to stop for the night, hoping she’d make an exception. How big is Seattle? This is getting ridiculous! 

“There.” Ellie whispers, putting a hand on your shoulder. You look over to Ellie, noticing her eyes were focusing on something entirely different in front of her. You follow her gaze, noticing a brick building in the difference, covered in plants. A fence wrapped around the outside of the building, and a large gate was the window to the courtyard, which held a beautiful fountain. Unfortunately, it no longer worked, even though you could imagine the water spewing out of the little angel's mouth at the top.

“Come on.” She murmurs, taking your hand as she pulls you along. You tag behind her, feeling the way her hand wraps around yours. Her skin was a bit rough at the moment, but you didn’t mind it. It was a rough couple of months on the road, with and without your horses. 

The two of you ran across the road, quickly and quieting, hoping know one was watching the two of you. Ellie lets go of your hand, then wraps it around the bars of the gate, shaking it to see if it will open easily. She then looks up, noticing the top of the gate was only a little rusted, and there were no sharp points.

“Hey. Let’s jump it.” She tells you, and you nod in understanding. 

“You first.”

‘No, ladies first~” She answers, placing her back against the gate as she kneels down and makes a cup shape with her hands. 

“You are such a charmer.” You tell her, smirking as blush rose onto your cheeks.

“Quickly now.” She replies, shrugging for you to get over the gate. Without another word, you grab onto the gate tightly, then place your foot in Ellie’s hands. With a few grunts, Ellie pushes you up as far as she can. Raising your hand up to the top, you grab on tightly and scurry all the way up the gate like a squirrel going up a tree. You didn’t realize how tired your body was until now, when it needed all your strength to pull the other half of your body up. With some effort however, and some more help from Ellie by pushing on the bottom of your shoes, you managed to get to the top and jump to the bottom on the other side.

“Alright, nice. Now open the gate.” 

You place your hands on the handlebars of the gate, pulling towards you, with a bit of force into it. However, the gate wasn’t moving. You sigh, looking over all the vines and leaves covering the fence and the fence gate. They were tied together, but not as if they grew together like that. You trace your finger over the vines, the soft and moist texture you are used to was not what you felt. It was rough and dry.

“These aren't real.” You tell her, pulling out a knife as you cut at the fake plants. “Someone put them here.”

“Well, that's not good, but it's not bad either.” She answers, looking around her. “Means someone is here to protect this place. It can’t just be one person either.”

“Stay on your toes.” You tell her, pulling open the gate as Ellie quickly makes her way into the courtyard. You both close it back with ease, looking around one last time before making your way towards the building. The building up close looks like a paper mache brick being held together with string. It looked like it could collapse at any moment, so you told this to Ellie. She understood what you meant and shared your fear of the collapse, but also mentioned that it likely wouldn’t happen if there were people here already. You knew you both couldn’t prove it yet, but you trusted Ellie’s instincts when she mentioned something like that. 

With soft steps, you both entered the hotel. The front doors showed less restraint than the gate outside, which filled you with hope. Even though you were worried as well, it didn’t stop your ambition. This was the closest you’ve gotten to Jesse since you and Ellie left Jackson a few months ago. Even if Jesse wasn’t in this building, or even in the immediate area, Seattle was the only lead you two had. A strong one at that. You couldn’t let it go to waste. 

It was eerily silent within the hotel, but you and Ellie stood close together and made sure to check in with one another every time you each finished checking a room for infected. Every room you walked into, every floor you went up. You didn’t want a repeat of the garage. 

On the fifth floor, the floorboards beneath your feet began to creak at any movements. Your heart rate increased at this, and you gripped onto your knife a bit harder. Walker over to the first door on your right, you leaned into the old, moist wood, listening to the other side before barging in. With no sounds arousing your suspicion, you placed a hand on the door handle, twisting it and opening it slowly. Peaking into the room, which was filled with dusty furniture and broken glass. Not too different from the other rooms you and Ellie looked through. You confidently opened the door all the way, taking a few steps within, the light from the sun finally seeping through the old and dusty blinds.

Suddenly, you feel an arm wrap around you, and the sharp, cold edge of a blade against your neck. With a gasp, you quickly move your hands up in the air, and instinctively drop your knife to the ground.

“Good job Wolf, didn’t have to even say anything. Now, give me your bag.” The familiar male voice sent a shiver through your spine. It was rougher and deeper than you remembered it, but it had been months since you last heard his voice.

“Jesse?” You speak. You feel the blade leave your skin slowly, the person behind you falling silent. As the knife gets a good distance away from your neck, you turn around. 

There he was, right there in front of you. Jesse. He was very dirty, dried bits of blood scattered across his face. His hair was also a lot longer than you remembered it, going past his ears a bit.

“Oh God… You look like crap.” You whisper, covering your mouth as the feeling of chlorine fills your nose.

“Still better looking than you.” He answers back, then he smiles. You step towards him, placing a hand on his cheek. With a closer look, you could see the blood was his own, a deep incision on his cheekbone. He flinched a bit at your touch, and you released slowly. 

“Sorry.” You tell him. 

“It's fine. How is everyone back home?” He questions. It takes you a moment to respond, you were still shocked that you managed to find him.

“Everyones fine.” Jesse nods, looking down at the floor. “So is Dina.”

“I wasn’t-”

“Mhm, sure.” You giggle at Jesse as his face turns a bright red. 

“So who all came with you?”

You hum softly, shrugging. “Ellie.”

“And?”

“That's it.”

“You two came on your own?” Jesse raised his voice, then looked around, lowering it once more. “Are you insane? That’s really stupid, especially for the two of you! Who knows what could've happened?”

“A lot happened. A smaller group was a better idea anyways.” You reply, noticing his eyes staring at your right arm. The arm where your new scar laid, and where a deep gash was just a few months ago from the radio station.

“When did that happen?”

“A few months ago. It’s not a big deal, Jesse.”

“How many times did you both almost die?”

“Quite a few, but we can handle ourselves! You know this? How many times have we gone on runs together and just made it back?”

“More than I’d like to admit to Maria, that's for sure.”

“We are fine.”

You both fall silent, and after a few moments, you watch as Ellie appears in the open doorway.

“Holy sh-”

“Sup.”

Ellie quickly embraces Jesse, giving him a swift, strong hug. You smiled down at the ground, your cheeks turning hot. The soft side of Ellie was one you always loved to see, and a welcome sight compared to her indifferent side you recently saw as you traveled together. 

“Took you two long enough.”

“You didn’t make it easy for us, Jesse.” Ellie responds, placing her hand in her brown hair. “Jesus, you scared us.”

“Trust me. I know, I feel terrible.”

“We thought..” The words were stuck in your throat, a tear began to stream down your cheek. “We thought we’d never find you. We’ve been gone from Jackson since the day after you stopped responding to the radio.”

“That long? Does anyone know you left?” Jesse asks. You and Ellie both stay silent, and Jesse sighs.

“Alright. Guess it's time to go home then.”

“No.” Ellie murmurs. You and Jesse both look towards her, and Ellie looks back to you. “Remember.. They are going to find Joel.”

You raised an eyebrow, confused at first, then you remembered. “Yes. The WLF, they are trying to find Joel.”

“What? Why? How do you know this?”

“We found a diary from one of the soldiers in a house not too far from the radio station. It said the leader's name, Isaac.”

“I heard that name before…” Jesse says, looking down to the ground as he scratches his head. 

“What exactly happened at the radio station, Jesse?” You ask him, turning towards him.

“I was surrounded. I had no clue they were there until they were on top of me. I was in the break room, just grabbing something to eat before I continued walking back home. They jumped me right as I walked out.”

“Did you hear anything?”

“Heard their scrambling, that's for sure. I heard the name Owen… Abby. They talked about those two like they weren’t there though, so I don’t think the group that got me was with them. But, on the way here, they talked about home. Talked about how they would torture me to get information out of me. A few nights ago, they stopped at this building, and as one of them let me go to the bathroom, I jumped on him.” He turns towards you, shaking his head. “This whole city was guarded relatively well. I’m surprised you two managed to get by.”

Ellie hums, nodding to him. “We didn’t see anyone, but we moved in the shadows pretty well. I don’t think anyone saw us.”

“Well, if anyone did, they would’ve gotten reinforcements. There are a lot of them.”

“Then we better take them out while we have the strength to.” Ellie says, looking at you. You widen your eyes, wondering what she was thinking.

“Woah, Ellie, we came all the way here to find Jesse. We found him, let's go home!” You plead, taking her hand.

“I know you're scared, but you said you're willing to go far. ‘I’m more than willing.’” Ellie repeats your words, and you shake your head quickly.

“To find him, not to hurt people! Let’s just go home, please. There are only three of us. We won’t last that long anyways.”

“Ellie, (Y/N) has a point. We can’t just bust in there. None of us are battle ready. None of us can take on that many people.”

“They don’t know there are three of us. They only know there is one of you.” Ellie tells Jesse, walking over to the window. “We just have to be smart about this. With the three of us in the shadows, they have no chance. We each can hold our own well, well enough to do plenty of damage and get away fast. Then, we meet back here.”

“That’s not a plan, Ellie. We can only hope to do enough damage, and even if we did, what’s the hope they don’t attack Jackson anyways? Find Joel, Maria, Tommy. Everyone else we care about? Our failure to make a dent will be their anger towards us only more so. We need to go home and tell everyone!”

“If they had any idea if we would be coming for you, they would never expect us to attack. They would expect us to go home. We can’t, we will lead them right there.”

You frown gently at Ellie’s idea. With each word she spoke, you could’ve sworn she was being greedy. Craving it. She wanted to do something about these people. They already kidnapped Jesse. Her plan was flawed, but doing nothing would put Jackson at risk. All those innocent people. The kids. You didn’t want that blood on your hands.

“Fine. We will do our best then.”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing this.” Jesse says, placing his hands on his hips. You turn to Jesse, shaking your head gently. You weren’t happy about it either, but you couldn’t just walk away and do nothing.

“They have to pay, Jesse.”

“You say this like they did something terrible to me!”

“They were going to! You heard them yourself!” You cry out, placing a hand on Jesse’s shoulder. “Think about Dina… If we brought these people back to Jackson…”

“She would want you to deal with them.” Ellie tags in, walking closer to both you and Jesse. She then lays a hand on your hip. You believed it comforted her more than it was meant to comfort you.

Jesse stands there, looking down at the two of you. You could understand why he didn’t want to do it. After all the three of you went through the past few months, all of you wanted to go home. Even Ellie, who seemed so eager to spend more time here, wanted to go home. You didn’t want to question it. 

“Fine. Come here.” Jesse gestures the two of you towards the other room, and you and Ellie both follow closely. Jesse leads the two of you to the window in a bedroom, kneeling down on the ground. 

“See that all the way over there.” Jesse points to the road below, towards a subway entrance.

“Yeah?” Ellie answers, looking at it.

“There is our way to their base. It's a football stadium not too far away, but walking there above ground wouldn’t be the best idea.”

“So we take the subway? And walk all the way there?” You ask, looking towards Jesse. He nods, but then he holds up his finger.

“The only unfortunate thing about this is the subway entrance. It leads into what I think is a camp area for them. After watching them for days though, I’ve noticed that every time a group leaves, the other group doesn’t arrive until five to ten minutes afterwards. That gives us more than enough time to run down there after the first group leaves later tonight. As soon as we do, we run down there, grab some supplies, if there is any, and quickly head towards the stadium.”

“How many are in a group?” You ask.

“About six each, only one group so far this past week has had more, but that was the group that greeted mine.”

“Wait, where are they? The group you were a part of?” Ellie asks Jesse.

“You think you're the only one that can hold your own?” He asks, smiling at Ellie. “Just don’t check out the dumpsters.”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” Ellie shakes her head. “You’re strong. Me and (Y/N) both knew it. We had high hopes you were still alive when we were coming to find you.”

“I don’t doubt it for a minute. I know the two of you were just dying to see me again.”

Ellie rolls her eyes, and you respond by punching Jesse’s shoulder.

“Alright. Let's do this then. We wait for a few hours, then we head there right as this group down here leaves.” 

You look over to Ellie, a shimmer of determination in her eyes. Her auburn hair was brighter in the sunlight, and her freckles were easier to see. You smiled softly at the sight. No matter what happened, you knew you could always trust her.

The day slowly turned to dusk, and with it came the gentle, cool spring breeze. You and Ellie agreed to stay up, letting Jesse sleep in the same hotel room you first found him in. He was exhausted, and you could tell just by the way he swayed back and forth and the dark circles under his eyes. As much as he said he wasn’t tired, you didn’t believe him. You practically forced him to lie down. However, he would only take the old sofa in the living room, leaving the bed to you and Ellie to share.

You made sure nothing was wrong with Jesse as he slept, hoping as you checked his body for cuts and bruises, you didn’t wake him. Thankfully, he was in the deepest sleep you’ve ever seen, and instead of waking, he snored like a newborn.

You walked back into the bedroom, looking at Ellie as she sat on the bed. The back of the bed was against the wall that had the door to the room, and it was facing a nice dresser that once had a gorgeous mirror. Now, it was broken, and completely covered the floor near it. The carpet floor was covered in nasty stains, some of which you were glad you had no clue what they were.

Ellie was on the right side of the bed, looking towards the window. You saw the diary you two found months ago when you both started your journey, settled on her hands. She was in her usual ripped button up shirt, the same one she always wore that looked so good on her.

Without saying a word, you turned your back towards the bed and flopped right onto it. The bed barely squeaked under your weight, and with a heavy sigh, you allowed yourself to sink into the bed. You hear Ellie laugh under her breath as you do, and all you do is laugh back.

“I don’t care if it's old and dusty… This is sooo comfy.” You say out loud, spreading your arms out to enjoy the feeling of the cushion beneath you. Ellie closes the diary and turns her body, laying on her back as she looks up to the ceiling. You adjust yourself, laying beside her. Your back and shoulders ached carrying around your bookbag all day everyday. You could only imagine how bad Ellie’s felt, knowing she had the larger bookbag, so she carried the most supplies. 

“Enjoy it. This might be the last good night's sleep we will have in a while.” She places the diary on the side table, then turns her body to its side, facing you.

“God. Don’t even say that. I don’t want this to end.” You groan, looking at Ellie. She was sitting herself up with her arm, looking down at you with a smile on her lips. It made you blush, her sweet, freckled face looking down at you like that.

“Just get some rest. We have a lot to worry about later.”

“And what if I want to stay up?”

“Then you can do that. No one is stopping you.” She concluded. As you both sat in a nice, comfortable silence, you couldn’t help but think back to everything that happened the past few months. Jesse goes missing, you and Ellie almost die trying to find him, you run into people that want to find Joel and possibly hurt him, then you finally find Jesse, which he almost kills you.

“Wow.”

“What?”

“You know how time flies… It feels like yesterday was twenty minutes ago… Last month was yesterday?” You question. Ellie hums, then nods.

“It felt like the opposite. I feel like we have been on the road for so long and I haven't taken a breath yet.”

“Never thought of it that way before.” Ellie expressed, shrugging. “I barely paid any attention.”

“Not even as you are sitting here?”

“I’m not worrying about it?”

“Why not?” You wonder out loud, looking away from Ellie as you stare at the ceiling.

“I care more about this now. What I have in front of me.”

You felt your heart skip a beat at her words. As you laid on the bed, you could feel Ellie’s finger draw small circles on your arm. They slowly turned into spirals, going up and up and up. Goosebumps rose onto your skin, and you shuddered a bit.

“Even if you know we might die tomorrow?” 

“I don’t care about tomorrow because everything will go exactly as planned.”

“It’s not always like that, Ellie.” You exhaled, looking back at her as she looked down at you with those big green eyes of hers. 

“I don’t care. This is how it’ll happen. We will walk into that subway, down to the football stadium. We will set that place ablaze and kill anyone that tries to kill us. We will save Jackson. We will survive. You will survive.”

You stayed silent for a moment, noticing Ellie’s fingers were wrapped around your tank top string, and with every second that passed, she twisted her fingers around it more. You could feel the cloth scratch at your skin and her rough knuckles brush against you. Your breath got caught in your throat, and you just now noticed how close Ellie was to your lips.

“You aren’t a god, you know? Not everything will go your way.” You quip, smirking softly as you trace your fingers against her jawline.

��It doesn’t matter what I am. I won’t let anyone take anything from me ever again. Not even you.” 

With those words, you breathe out happily. No matter where you were and what would happen, as long as Ellie was with you, you were invincible. 

Before you get a chance to say anything else to her, Ellie’s lips crash into yours in a lustful, wet passion that no one could stop. Your need for her at first was nothing compared to now. Your hand found its way into her hair, gently cradling her head and keeping her as close to you as possible. 

You could feel her legs tangle up with your own, but you had to admit you were barely paying attention. You were focused on her lips. Her sweet, perfectly sculpted lips. You thought the first few kisses with her were amazing, but wow, this was unlike anything you thought you could experience. The way she not only worked her lips, but the way she placed her hands on your body, sending lighting through your body with the slightest touch. You are a mess, and she was only going to make you messier. 

You finally caught a breath as Ellie released from the kiss, but she only made her way to the skin beneath your ear. As if she wasn’t already making you go crazy, she just had to make it so much worse. Biting and kissing at your sensitive skin, you tried your best to hold back any noises that could’ve seeped from your mouth. But each time she bit, she didn’t seem satisfied. She would get a moan out of you one way or another, and she was nowhere close to finishing. 

As she released her hold on your neck, your fingers were finding their way up to her shirt, and finally found the buttons. As you struggled to undo her shirt, she only laughed under her breath as you did so terribly. She took over, pulling it over herself, then taking off your tank top. Both of you are now shirtless, the wind coming in from the window doing little to nothing to the heat within the room now. You would've been surprised if you felt any kind of chill anytime soon. 

You sat up, kissing Ellie again as you set your fingers against the belt on her jeans. She followed close behind you, and each of you shimmied out of your clothing that was oh so uncomfortable now, considering the circumstances. If you thought seeing Ellie’s biceps caused you to lose breath, you were not ready for her toned abs. Your face turned a deep red at the sight, but you were quickly focused right back on her eyes as she cupped your face. 

“Your so fucking perfect.” She whispered under her breath. Because of her words, all you could do was bite your lips, enticing her to kiss you more. Again and again. All you wanted was her at this moment. 

“So have me then.”

She obliged. She pushed you back down onto the bed, first kissing at your lips, biting and nibbling at them. She then went down, each kiss sending sparks of electricity through your body, each one stronger than the last. 

“E-Ellie…” You begin to moan, then you quickly cover your mouth. The last thing you wanted was to wake up Jesse because you were indulging too much. 

“Don’t worry about him. He hasn’t slept in days. Doubt he’d hear a thing.” Ellie advised. For a moment, you almost didn’t believe her. It was a trick, a way of making you turn into a little puddle for her right then and there. Then, you thought, Who gives a fuck?

Ellie’s kisses got dangerously close to your core, so you moved your hips up slowly, almost pushing her away. However, she used her own body weight to push you back down and begin kissing at your panty line. Only small, shuddering breaths were escaping your lips at this point. You were waiting for her to make her first move. You could only imagine what she would do, and that only made you hotter and wetter than before. 

She hungrily pulled down your panties, first planting kisses on your core, almost carelessly. She was like a natural, not afraid at all. It was enough to make you moan, for real this time. Her hot breath landed on your snatch just perfectly, and with each kiss, they got wetter and there was more tongue. She was eating you out with a passion, and at this point, it was so ethereal, it was like a dream. Your legs began to cramp as you tried to pull away, not because you wanted to, but because it was so good it was impossible to stay still. Ellie’s hands, however, were immovable and were placed gracefully under your thighs. 

Just when you thought things couldn’t get any better, you feel a digit insert into your core. You gasped aloud, covering your mouth instinctively. Ellie’s hands, no longer on your thighs, were placed at your snatch. But, one of her hands trailed up to your face and pulled your own away, making you helpless to her and her actions. 

“Ellie, that's not fair.” You whine out. Although you were half joking, not minding this slightly dominant side she was showing, she inserted two more fingers within you, as if to punish you for even thinking of hiding.

“Fuck~!” You cried out happily, her fingers curling perfectly against all your sensitive spots. Spots you yourself didn’t know you had. You were at her mercy and we entirely hers at this moment, but you didn’t care. You felt nothing but bliss. 

With each stroke of her fingers and her tongue together, a familiar, yet different feeling rose in your core. It came closer and closer, and with each second your moans became louder and louder. And Ellie wouldn’t stop. She was going faster. She was going to make sure you reached the perfect, euphoric state that you deserved, that you both were building up to. 

Finally, with one last curl of her fingers, waves began to pulse through your body at full blast. It was like nothing you ever felt and nothing you yourself would have ever done. It felt like it lasted forever, that perfect high that Ellie gave to you. You thought you could hear gentle words come out of her mouth, but mostly all your heart was your own heartbeat.

“Ellie?”

“You made a mess of yourself, (Y/N),” Ellie whispers, looking up at you from where she laid. She sat up, the sound of dripping liquid from her fingers landing onto the mattress. “And the bed.”

“S-Sorry…” You whispered. You were not sorry. You had the best orgasm you had ever felt. You’d never be sorry.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure you could make it up to me~” 

[kiwixlime]

Finders Keepers - Chapter Twenty-Three

Warnings: Just pure fluff. Teensy bit of angst. Mostly fluff. We need some sweetness before we get to the salty.

A/N: As always, thank you so much for reading! I appreciate every like, comment, interaction. It makes my day to know people are enjoying this fic. I hope I can continue to do these characters justice. Also, before I forget, I’ve started a taglist! If you’d like to be added, either reply to this post or send me a message and I'll be happy to add you!

Recommended listening for the end of the chapter is Yellow by Coldplay.

It’s a quiet evening at the Miller house. Joel’s in the kitchen cooking up something quick and easy for dinner while Bay sits with Ellie in the dining room, watching the girl sketch a portrait of their favorite man. She smiles as Ellie draws out the intricate details of Joel’s face from the lines around his eyes to the scar on his nose. It’s all done from memory and Bay stares in awe at the talent Ellie possesses.

Each day, it seems like Bay learns something new about the teenager. And each new detail makes their bond grow stronger. The fact that Ellie is so willing to open up about herself is refreshing. She holds nothing back. And it’s so different from the way Bay acts, but even Joel comments that Ellie usually doesn’t open up all that easy. She just really likes Bay.

In fact, Ellie likes Bay so much that she often talks about her adventures with Joel before they arrived in Jackson. The teen doesn’t share that information often. She prefers to keep that part of her life private. But for some reason, with Bay, she tells her all the stories. And Bay loves to hear them. She doesn’t know everything the duo have seen, but she knows they’ve witnessed a lot traveling across the states.

And right now, Ellie is sharing a story Bay has never heard before. The time she and Joel first met. It’s something Bay’s been curious about for months, how the two of them came to be a family, but she never asked either of them, knowing that it wasn’t her business.

In the kitchen, Joel stops making noise, putting a pause on the food. He peeps around the kitchen to where his girls are sitting and looks on with suspicion. Bay catches it and thinks it still isn’t her business. But Joel makes his way to them and sits down across from Bay. He glances at Ellie and they exchange a look, having a silent conversation with one another. Bay feels a little uneasy watching them, but at the same, intrigued.

Joel’s palms sweat with anxiety, mentally begging Ellie not to give away the real reason she was being smuggled. Now is not the time for that revelation. Ellie seems to understand this.

“Yeah,” the girl says, nodding her head, facing Bay. “Joel was hired to smuggle me. Well, Joel and a woman named Tess.” Ellie says the name with apprehension, hoping that Joel won’t get upset. Surprisingly, he doesn’t.

“Hold up,” Bay stops her as immediate questions pop into her head. “Smuggle? Why were you being smuggled?”

Joel slightly shakes his head “no” when Ellie looks at him. His leg bouncing almost alerts Bay, but he manages to cover it up with a cough, knocking his fist down onto the table. He mumbles a quiet “sorry” when she glances over at him.

“I was with the Fireflies,” Ellie says and Joel’s heart sinks. Ellie shoots him a glare that says “trust me”, so he does. Not having any other choice in the matter. “A pretty big group, actually. You were a Firefly once. Did you know Marlene?”

“Marlene?” Bay asks in shock. “I didn’t know her,” she shakes her head. “I heard about her, though. Wow, you were really with Marlene? How? Why did you leave?”

The questions are all expected and Joel’s nerves aren’t easing up. At this point, he’s fidgeting where he sits, but luckily Bay and Ellie are too engaged in conversation to care. He’s really feeling his age now, all this stress is going to give him a heart attack.

“Well,” Ellie begins awkwardly. “Marlene was friends with my mom. And after my mom died, she promised to look after me. But it was becoming unsafe in Boston and Marlene got hurt. So she hired Joel and Tess to smuggle me to a different group. One where I’d be safer.” She lies and she hates lying to Bay, her best friend. She wants to tell her everything, but she knows Joel’s not ready. Will he ever be?

A sigh of relief courses through Joel’s tense body. He finally settles back into his seat and gets his breathing under control once more. Bay isn’t looking at him when he mouths a “thank you” to Ellie.

“Wow, that’s intense…But uhm,” Bay hesitates, anxiously tapping her fingers along the wooden tabletop. “Can I ask who Tess is?”

Ellie’s face reddens and she peers up at Joel with a timid smile. She knows that what happened with Tess took a toll on Joel and he never wanted to talk about it. He’s different now, so she doesn’t feel scared to bring the woman up. Still, she has some doubts.

“She was with me,” Joel cuts in weakly. “We, uh,” he clears his throat as his memory recalls Tess, his fiery companion. “We were a team. She… she got bit when we were trying to get Ellie to her destination. We ran into some trouble and Tess stayed behind to fight. Gave us a head start. And she died.”

“I’m sorry, Joel,” Bay says with a frown, knowing how hard it is to lose someone you care about in such a devastating way. And she’s happy that Joel’s not shutting her out, sharing information about his past relationships. He talks briefly about Tess, and only briefly. Bay listens happily, learning about the other woman. According to Joel, she was a fighter, stubborn, ruthless. And Ellie agrees, saying she was a lot like Joel.

“How did she…” Bay trails off. Maybe it’s not polite to ask these things.

“We were in a museum,” Ellie sighs. “Tess and I got separated from Joel. We tried to fight them off and once Joel found us we got them all. But she got bit. And when we got to the Capitol Building to meet my group, they weren’t there. She insisted that Joel finish the job. And he did. But we never found my group. So he took me in as his own. And now here we are.”

Ellie smiles, wrapping her story up, keeping it short and sweet and omitting details that would have Joel panicking. He frowns and stands up, heading back to the kitchen to finish the food. Ellie watches, but lets him do his own thing, going back to her drawing book and finishing her sketch.

Bay’s the one who gets up and follows Joel. She doesn’t say anything at first, going around the pantry and picking the things out she needs to prepare drinks. She grabs a few pieces of fruit, some ice, some water and gets to work on the counter beside Joel.

He’s calm as he watches her, smiling to himself at how she focuses on cutting up the fruit and crushing the ice. His stance softens and from the corner of her eye, Bay can tell. “I’m sorry about Tess,” she says quietly, slicing a mango into small pieces. Joel’s heart lurches in his chest. “I know how hard it is to lose someone like that,” she frowns, offering her sympathy.

“Thank you,” he says, quietly. “I probably should have told ya about her,” he admits, furrowing his brows as he thinks it over. She’s always been honest about her past relationships. He should do the same. “I just didn’t know… I don’t know.”

“It’s okay,” Bay smiles at him. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I’d never push.”

Joel’s thankful for that. He doesn’t like bringing up the past much. And as long as Bay is okay with that, he’s happy. He finishes the food, keeping it warm on the stove until they’re ready to eat.

Bay is squeezing fruit juice into a glass as he walks up to her. He wraps his arms around her as she puts the finishing touches on the refreshing drinks, topping them with fruit slices. He kisses her cheek before burying his face in her warm neck, inhaling her scent. On the topic of past relationships, he thinks of how many people have had the chance to be this intimate with her. It’s something he doesn’t want to think about, but can’t help. His curiosity gets the best of him and he finally asks about other guys she’s been with.

“What were your past relationships like?” He quizzes with interest. He knows about Tommy and bits and pieces of another guy, but bringing up Tess just made him think. And now he can’t stop thinking.

“Are you asking about guys I’ve had sex with or guys I’ve had some type of beneficial relationship with?” She asks with a sly grin. “Because those are very different numbers,” she teases. “And you know I’ve never been a ‘relationship’ girl.”

Joel grimaces and shakes away the intruding thoughts in his head. “Well, I don’t wanna know about everyone you’ve slept with,” he says with disdain. “Just…relationships. Or whatever you call ‘em.”

Bay hums in understanding and turns around. She’s facing Joel, arms slipping around his shoulders comfortably. His hands stay on her waist, gently squeezing her hips, just happy to know she’s there in his arms.

“You know about Tommy…and I’m pretty sure you’ve heard enough about him,” she giggles and Joel nods, laughing himself. He’s definitely heard enough. “And then there was Adam and I guess we were more serious than I like to think. I mean, we lived together at one point. But like I told you before, he was safety. He was the only reason I didn’t get killed.” She bites her lip as she thinks of DJ. She’s never told Joel about DJ. She didn’t think she’d ever have to, but now is probably a good time. “And then there was a guy named DJ. He…he lives in California. He’s my contact. It wasn’t like a serious thing, but I’d hook up with him every time I went out that way. And I used to go out that way a lot.”

“California?” Joel asks with disappointment in his voice. California, the place Bay traveled to not that long ago. After Joel told her how he felt. “You were just in California,” he points out, angrily and looks away from her.

“I was,” she says, dropping her arms from his shoulders and bringing her hands to his face. She makes him face her, smiling softly when their eyes meet. “And nothing happened with DJ. A little flirting, but that was it. Harmless. I promise.”

“Flirting, huh,” Joel scoffs and pushes her hands away, pouting like a child.

“Are you really gonna be mad at me?” She asks, cooing as she pinches his cheeks. “You’re so cute when you’re jealous, but nothing will ever happen between DJ and I again. So stop pouting.”

Joel can only roll his eyes before giving in. He’s not even upset, but he likes to push Bay’s buttons. And, okay, there is a part of him that hopes she never has to go to California again. But that’s just silly.

“In all seriousness,” Bay says. “I understand how hard it can be to lose people and not want to talk about it. But I want to thank you for opening up to me anyway.”

Joel smiles weakly, a pang of guilt hitting him so hard he feels like he might faint. He knows that he’s an asshole for hiding Ellie from her, but as much as he cares for Bay, his loyalty lies with Ellie. And his number one goal is still her protection. He trusts Bay, he really does, but he’s still so unsure.

“Drinks are done!” She says with a smile. “Want to place these at the table so I can go wash up real quick?”

Joel nods and takes the tray from her, watching as she bounces up the stairs into his bathroom. He sighs and walks the drinks to the table, setting one day at each placement. Ellie takes the moment to talk to Joel, nervously gnawing at her lip.

“We have to tell her,” she whispers in a panic. “She needs to know. Joel, I can see it. You guys are getting serious or whatever. I don’t want to keep lying.” Ellie’s lip quivers. She feels just as guilty for keeping Bay in the dark.

“We will,” Joel says with certainty. “After your birthday surprise, we will.”

“Why after?” Ellie hisses.

“If somethin’ happens and she doesn’t take this well…I don’t want it to ruin your day. Just a couple more days, kiddo. I promise.” He means what he says. He has to focus on Ellie first and her big day. Thanks to Maria, he’s planned the perfect surprise for her.

The teenager scoffs, but agrees. “Fine,” she says, folding her arms as she falls back into her chair. She glances up at Joel inquisitively. “What’s the surprise?”

“I ain’t tellin’ you,” the man grunts. “Stop askin’.”

“Stop asking what?” Bay asks as she comes down the stairs.

“Where is Joel taking me for my birthday?” Ellie pleads, thinking Bay will crack.

She only laughs. “I’m not telling you that.”

“You both suck,” she sulks.

Bay and Joel finish setting the table with the food when he pulls her aside.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna come with us?” He asks her, really wanting her to be included in this trip. He knows Ellie will want her there, too.

“No,” she insists. “You guys need this time. You’ll have so much fun. And I’ll be right here when you get back.” She kisses his nose and takes the plate from his hands, heading for the dining room. He follows with a sigh, finally giving up.

--*--

The night is still young and the trio are lounging in the living room, watching a movie. It’s part of a series Joel and Ellie have watched before, but Bay’s totally clueless. She still does her best to follow along, smiling whenever Ellie or Joel make a comment on what’s happening. She’s with Joel on the couch, her head in his lap while her legs splay out to the other end. Ellie sits in a chair, a bowl of snacks in her lap.

Bay sighs in content while Joel’s fingers play with her hair. There’s no place else she’d rather be right now. Her eyes are heavy with sleep and before she knows it, she’s out cold.

It’s Ellie who wakes her up, a gentle shake to her shoulder. Bay rubs her eyes and yawns, sitting up and away from Joel. He’s grinning at her like a fool. “What’s up?” She croaks.

“For starters, you fell asleep,” Ellie mocks, snoring in exaggeration. Bay laughs and shoves her away as she places her feet back on the floor. “And second, I’m leaving for Cat’s. We’re gonna listen to a few records, do some drawings…” She trails off and Bay notices the playful glint in her eye.

“Have fun,” she says with a smirk and Ellie blushes. “I’ll see ya later.”

“See ya,” she hops up and grabs her bag, glancing back at Joel. “Later, old man!”

She’s out the door in a flash. Joel gets up from the couch and walks towards the closet by the stairs. He opens it and pulls out one of his flannels, tossing it to Bay. “Meet me outside,” he says.

Bay nods and slips on the large green and black flannel, wrapping it around herself. It smells like Joel and it’s a scent she’s grown to love. Grabbing her boots, she slips them on and heads outside to wait for Joel. She takes a seat on the porch steps, pulling the sleeves of the garment down over her hands as a light chill snips through the night air.

A few minutes later, Joel returns, a guitar in hand and Bay can’t hold back her smile. Finally, Joel is going to play for her. At least she hopes. She’s been pestering him forever, but he’s been too shy, or insecure, she doesn’t know. “Are you going to play for me?” She asks, hopeful.

He nods with a boyish grin and sits down onto the chair across from her. Bay scoots over on the steps, propping her elbows up on her knees and resting her head in her hands, giddy like a schoolgirl. Her heart skips a beat at how gorgeous he looks before her, biting his lip with his guitar in his lap.

“You, uh, you ever listen to Coldplay?” He asks her, nervously picking at his guitar. She nods, her eyes sparkling under the glow of the moonlight. He inhales and at last, his fingers begin to pluck at the strings.

The opening chords are familiar, ones she’s heard before on one of her records. As much as she wants to watch him, she closes her eyes for a moment, focusing on the melody, trying to think of what the song is. Then he begins to sing and it clicks. Yellow by Coldplay.

Look at the stars

Look how they shine for you

And everything you do

Yeah, they were all yellow

Her eyes snap open, drawn to him and nothing else. His finger work is intricate, skilled. His voice is smooth like honey. She’s completely lost in his performance. Passion bleeds from him into the song and the butterflies in her stomach won’t stop fluttering. The intense emotion building up inside of her threatens to spill out as he continues to sing.

Your skin

Oh yeah, your skin and bones

Turn in to something beautiful

Do you know

You know I love you so

You know I love you so

The two of them sit on the porch, under the stars, Joel’s voice carrying through the night. Bay watches with watery eyes, trying not to cry while he’s flawlessly strumming away on the guitar, every once in a while lifting his gaze to meet hers. His hazel eyes swim with adoration and she knows.

When the song finishes, Bay smiles through glossy eyes and stands up. She walks over to him and he waits, setting his guitar down next to him. He pulls her onto his lap, locking his lips with hers. She kisses him in a way she’s never kissed another soul before. Something about him just latches onto her heart.

“That was beautiful,” she says quietly, savoring the soft moment between them.

“Thank you,” he grins. His hold on her tightens and they sit like that for a few minutes.

The night breeze is cool and crisp, but the electricity between them keeps them warm. Bay thinks she’s ever been so content in her life. And Joel’s heart beats rapidly as his mind goes into overdrive. He’s been thinking of something for a long time now and he wasn’t sure how to bring it up. But now…now seems like the right moment.

“Bay,” he speaks up, earning a quiet hum from her. He kisses the top of her head and sighs. Out with it. “When Ellie and I get back from this trip… I’d like it if you would move in with me.” He says.

Her lips break into a big smile, her stomach doing flips at his request. “Really?” She squeaks out in a quiet voice.

He nods, smiling back just as bright. “You don’t have to answer now,” he adds quickly. “Think about it while we’re gone. Then let me know. Okay?” His eyes search hers for any hesitancy, but all he can see is…love? He doesn’t know. And that’s okay for now.

“Okay,” Bay says, still elated. “I’ll think about it.”

Masterlist

Taglist: @extraneous-trip

[ratsketches]

Post-TLOU Part II / TLOU III headcanons and ideas (just for fun):

Ellie ends up getting a dog companion to maybe help with her ptsd and other stuff after she goes to Jackson and talks to a therapist, or she just gets one after a suggestion from Maria or something else: maybe her dog is called Star or Kobyashi (Koby for short - named after the ship in savage starlight)

JJ is a really sweet kid - he’s got a heart of gold like his dad, Dina’s brains, but he also has Ellie’s stubbornness and he learns a bunch from her

Dina and Ellie have made up and live together again after the events of the second game - maybe the events of part III starts with JJ being 12 or something and he’s playable in the game

There’s flashbacks with Ellie and Dina fixing their relationship and JJ growing up and stuff with them - along with more development stuff with Dina, Jesse and Ellie’s friendship

At first, Dina and Ellie are distant but she still lets him see JJ because she’s his mom too

Ellie and Dina being soft and corny wives with each other with their son

When Ellie left, JJ cried for so long and he would always look for her and when she comes back, he follows her around and clings to her for a really long time, worrying that she will leave again

One night Dina has to work late at the clinic, so Ellie decides to have a movie night with JJ because he doesn’t want to settle to bed early

She decides to put on Jurassic park because he hasn’t seen it yet and the two end up watching it in the living room and it brings back happy memories of Joel

JJ says Ellie is a raptor like the ones in the movie (because of one of her hands only having three fingers and how people think she can be kind of scary sometimes), so she wiggles them around and tickles him with her “scary Dino hand/fingers”

The two end up falling asleep before Dina gets back, Ellie clutching JJ close to her chest or tucked safely between the back of the sofa and Ellie’s chest - blanket and arm wrapped around him protectively while he rests in front, with her body covering to keep him safe

Ellie wakes up a little after Dina gets back from the patrol and she gives her a sleepy kiss, as Dina brings them both to bed and falls asleep together with them

Maybe a little while after that JJ secretly goes through Dina’s work notes that she made while building the prosthetics for Ellie and he ends up building Ellie some ‘raptor claws’ (maybe they’re some hollowed out wooden/other fingers with claws on the ends of them) - Ellie refuses to take them off for ages after he gives them to her

Maybe JJ takes up wood carving like Joel used to do after seeing the stuff he made (he makes Ellie and Dina’s rings when they get married, he made some prosthetic finger caps for Ellie, etc)?

JJ is usually at school all day and Dina and Ellie both go back on patrols together - usually coming back and picking JJ up at the end of the day

Sometimes Ellie and Dina go on farming rotation - or at least Dina does, while Ellie does a lot of manual labour with fixing buildings and things and JJ will sometimes come along with them or he’ll stay with Jesse’s parents

All three of them celebrating Jewish holidays together and one day Ellie tries to cook some food for the occasion (JJ helps) to surprise Dina one day after she has a really long patrol (maybe she has to go on a week long patrol or something with a big group and Ellie hangs out with JJ at home while she’s gone)

Ellie and Dina still have the odd few arguments and things and sometimes like all couples do

Sometimes Dina panics when Ellie is gone for too long but they make up afterwards and Ellie tries to leave notes as much as she can

Ellie still loves to draw and paint and maybe sometimes she does little drawing sessions with some of the kids at the daycare and stuff?

Sometimes JJ will find his moms hunched over a desk in Ellie’s little studio / their workshop - Ellie scribbling diagrams and notes while Dina is building things and Ellie makes some adjustments here and there (the two of them working on little projects together and there usually being prototypes of various things here and there in the house)

Dina builds electronics and stuff and becomes the new sort of Eugene for Jackson - making lots of explosive traps and things for the town, which does end up clearing out a lot of infected and things (they put up those sign drawings Dina mentioned in the game to let strangers know) and maybe Ellie even mentions the traps that the rattlers used when she was in Santa Barbara

Maybe Ellie ends up going on patrol alone sometimes but one time JJ decides to join her when he’s a little older and the two hang out for a bit

One day, JJ accidentally breaks Ellie’s guitar after wanting to try and learn how to play it and Ellie finds out when she gets back. She’s a little upset, but not at him and she reassures him, saying they can fix it and she could maybe even teach him how to play the guitar.

Maybe he gets a really gnarly scar on his hand/wrist from the wood or something snapping and after she patched him up, he sits in her lap as she starts to teach him.

JJ’s more quiet and stuff like Jesse, but he can still be kind of sassy and tends to get over enthusiastic when he’s wound up or excited and stuff like Dina (maybe because of his quieter nature, him and Ellie tend to get each other more?)

JJ tends to have more of a quieter fascination with stuff and will hang out with Ellie, but he can get wound up sometimes and get a little too loud and energetic when he’s hyped up

Ellie and Dina give JJ his own room when he gets a little older, but for a fair bit of it he likes to just sleep in bed with them - especially after Ellie came back

Dina still struggles with her own ptsd sometimes too

Either Ellie and Dina still live in Jackson, or eventually they move back into the farm house

Tommy and Ellie have either grown distant or Tommy and Ellie repair their relationship over time

Ellie and Dina teaching JJ how to ride a horse

JJ goes on his first patrol and Ellie tries to be casual about it, but internally she’s panicking

When he was younger, after Ellie came back JJ got into a habit of gnawing on/playing with the stumps left of her missing fingers - at first Dina tried to stop it because she didn’t want it to upset Ellie, but she it didn’t bother her as much as she initially thought it would

Ellie still struggles with her PTSD, but compared to how she was at the farm, she’s a lot better than she was before - although she still struggles looking into mirrors and things like Joel did

When he’s older, JJ sometimes visits Joel’s and Jesse’s graves to talk to them - wondering what it would have been like to meet them and stuff (maybe one point in the game has you playing as him visiting the graveyard after coming back from school, before he heads home to see his moms)

In Tlou part III has you play as JJ with Ellie (and possibly Dina) being a companion to him - mirroring Joel and Ellie’s relationships and roles in the first game

JJ calls Ellie ‘Mom’ and Dina ‘Mama’ or he calls both of them mama

Jessie Joel / Jessie Jr loves messing around with tech and electronics like his Mom (sometimes he will look through Ellie’s diagrams and her Mom’s prototypes and things), but he also really likes nerdy stuff like Ellie (although more robots and machines than dinosaurs - although he still thinks they’re pretty rad)

JJ really likes to figure out how things work and how machines and things fit together

Jessie Joel / Jesse Jr has his Dad’s mullet, but his hair curls more like Dina’s as he gets older

Ellie has the biggest soft spot for him - usually she’s the one to buckle whenever JJ wants / needs stuff and Dina has to be the one to rein them in

When he’s wound up, JJ can have Jesse’s dumbass challenge streak, but generally tries to be more cautious with stuff?

Ellie can be protective of JJ, but she tries not to be too overprotective like Joel could be sometimes?

Ellie still calls him little spud and potato sometimes and Dina still calls him and Ellie goobers

Ellie and Dina get married at some point and maybe JJ makes their rings (as per his insistence), or she makes it out of something Joel owned as a way for him to still be with them or something

JJ really loves tech like his mom, so one day after he gets into a fight with some kids or something after sticking up for someone, Ellie decides to bring him out to the museum Joel took her to (or something like that) and he’s in awe over everything - especially when she shows him all the space tech / equipment and stuff and maybe they find something there that they decide to work on together as a little project

Maybe Ellie and Dina don’t live in the farm anymore but they still have a mini farm in Jackson, or they do eventually move back there

Dina builds electronics and stuff and becomes the new sort of Eugene for Jackson - making lots of traps and things for the town and decking out their farm with them to keep themselves safe from infected and things (they put up those sign drawings Dina mentioned to let people know)

Ellie teaches JJ how to play guitar (although he learns how to do it left handed)

Ellie has some prosthetic fingers she uses from time to time that Dina made for her - she doesn’t always use them but they help with some things here and there

JJ loves his dumbass pun loving moms - although a lot of kids would probably be super embarrassed by the two of them, he loves them to bits and is just as bad with the puns

When JJ is 12, Ellie and Dina are 30 something

Ellie and Dina build traps and mechanisms and things for Jackson and the town now has explosive traps and things with signs to keep infected out

One time JJ splits his knee open during an attack when some raiders grab him and Ellie snaps big time when she sees it - JJ and Dina have never seen Ellie so mad before

JJ loves whenever Ellie sings and he wants to be able to play guitar and stuff like her - although he doesn’t think he’s a particularly great singer

Ellie learns to play the guitar left handed - it takes her some time but she gets the hang of it eventually

At first when she gets back from Santa Barbara, Ellie mostly keeps to herself in Jackson and does a lot of the tougher jobs and stuff - Dina sees her struggling every now and then because of her missing fingers, so she builds some prosthetics for her to try and help

Dina builds finger prosthetic prototypes for Ellie to use and they’re still pretty distant at first, but as Dina works on better and better versions of the prosthetics for Ellie, the two hang out more and are able to reconnect and be a family again as they gradually fix their relationship

There’s some kind of attack on jackson or something at one point and Ellie and Dina go into action mode and maybe the family has to flee and this kickstarts a journey they have to go on for a new home or something, while Abby and Lev are with the fireflies and stuff and the story follows a similar beat to the first game

Like how the first and second game followed western genre cliques, this third game follows another one

JJ travelling around with his two badass moms kicking ass together

Jesse Joel ends up growing taller and taller each day like his dad, and when he’s an older teen, he’s taller than Dina but not quite as tall as Ellie (although he does eventually grow taller than her or maybe he ends up being a mix between Dina and Jesse’s heights)

Jesse’s parents look after JJ sometimes and they’ll visit for family dinners and things every now and then

Ellie tries to work hard on fixing her relationship with Dina and although Jesse’s parents were a little wary after she left, they’ve grown close to her again and maybe Tommy and Maria help out sometimes too

While Dina is always there for Ellie, I’d love to see Ellie comforting Dina in the third game

JJ hangs out with some of the town’s kids and stuff, doing snowball fights and other things

Feel free to add stuff onto this or write any of these if anything peaks your interest!! I’ve got some fic ideas and things I’d love to try and get round to writing but aaaa I just love this little family ;; really hope we see them reunite at some point

[tlou-1]

Joel x Reader (Home) - Chapter 17

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6| Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13| Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 TBA

Chapter 17 - Ellie discovers the truth and a Birthday

“Joel just be careful you don’t take him too close to the steps” you call from your seat on the porch where you sat strumming Joel’s guitar. 

Joel had been trying to teach Patrick to walk for a few weeks now, “Our boy will be walking by his first birthday, just watch him” he called back. He was standing behind Patrick, holding the child’s tiny hands in his to hold him up as they tried making their way across the porch towards you. To put it simply Joel was an amazing father but you already knew this was the case from watching him with Ellie over the years. 

He picks up Patrick and takes the seat across from you, “What you playing?” He asks. 

“Nothing” you smile resting your arm and chin on the body of the guitar, “Didn’t sound like nothing” he props Patricks on his knees. 

“It was just something Ellie and I were learning together a while back” you sigh. Ellie had been visiting less and less often in the recent weeks.

“Play it for me” Joel says softly sitting back in his seat with Patrick. 

“All I can taste is this moment

And all I breathe is your life 

And sooner or later it’s over

I just don’t wanna miss you tonight 

And I don’t want the world to see me 

Cause I Don’t think they’d understand 

When everything made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am” 

“You’re finger pickings gotten pretty good.” Joel smiles at you  

“Ellie helped with the arrangement, you spoken to her recently?” You ask trying to sneak Ellie into conversation. 

He fell silent, you both seemed to know something was the matter.

“Are you ever going to tell her the truth?” You continue placing the guitar down, again he doesn’t say anything. You hated when he got like this, closed off, “She might understand why you did what you did.”  

“She wouldn’t understand. That girl went through hell to get to the fireflies, she would never understand” he says shortly but quietly, even when no one was around it was like Joel was worried the air would hear what he had done to protect Ellie that day. 

“They were going to kill her, she didn’t even know” you reply but Joel clearly doesn’t want to carry on this conversation announces its late and that Patrick should be going down for the night. That was the last time you discussed it before Ellie returned to the hospital. 

Joel had went out back early to wake Ellie for patrol, it was still relatively dark out and you were still in bed. He ran back into the house and to your bedroom. He looked around frantically as he filled his bag with different supplies and pulled on his usual coat, “She’s gone Y/N, she’s taken off for Salt Lake City, for that damn hospital” he announces. You begin to get out of bed to get ready to go with Joel but he says someone needs to stay with Patrick, he was right.

“Bring her back and you be safe, you hear me?” You say to your husband as he gently presses a kiss to your forehead.

“Ain’t I always?” he smiles as he leaves. Nothing good could come from them returning to the hospital. 

You pace the house for two days, keeping yourself busy with Patrick to try and take your mind off the idea of Ellie and Joel out there on their own. You hear the back garden gate open and you rush round back to Ellie’s shed expecting to find both of them but you only find Ellie. 

“Ellie, thank god! Where is Joel?” You ask as she flings her backpack on her bed, something in her body language made you stop. 

“He shouldn’t be much longer, I left ahead of him” She sits down on the bed, “Did you know?” She asks quietly, her head in her hands. You don’t know what to say, you try to speak, to act like you don’t know what she is talking about but Ellie see’s past it, she knew otherwise she would never have asked. 

“He told me after we got married… I was furious at him for telling me, for making me keep it from you but what he did, he did the right thing Ellie” 

“The right thing?” She repeats.

“Yes Ellie, I don’t want to argue but I would have done the same thing”.

“I am done with him, I said I would stay in Jackson but that’s it” she says lifting her head from her hands to look at you.

“And what about me and Patrick? Are you done with us too?” You can barely look at her. 

There is a long pause before Ellie speaks, “I don’t know”. 

You sit on the steps of the front porch waiting for Joel. When he see’s you sitting there, he knows you knew and stops in tracks. You rush towards him and enwrap him in your arms,  “Let get you inside, you must be exhausted” you say pulling back and brushing a bit of hair our of his gaze. Joel doesn’t say much while you cook dinner for the evening. When you sit down to eat together, you reach out across the table for this hand and give it a reassuring squeeze, “She will come round eventually”. 

“I don’t know about that darlin” he smiles softly appreciating the gesture but knowing better than to believe it. Once you finish eating you clear the table, as you go to take his empty plate you hover over him and place kiss and top of his. Joel lets out a sigh and holds the hand you placed on his shoulder to keep you close, pulling you round he sits you on his lap and holds you. 

“I wouldn’t change it you know, what I did” he says into your shoulder.

You pull back so that you are looking each other in the eyes, you notice Joel’s are tearing. Placing you hands on each side of his face, feeling the roughness of his beard below you kiss him and say “I know”. 

Ellie is true to her word when it comes to Joel, she avoids him at all opportunity, they no longer patrol together and she tries to avoid crossing paths in town. Every time they did bump into each other, Ellie’s coldness towards Joel was painful for anyone to watch the last couple months. The two who had laughed, protected and loved each other wouldn’t say two words. Ellie was still having difficult feelings when it came to you, because your part in this had only came about because of Joel, you would still speak in town but there was this dryness to every conversation. You are heading to work at the Tipsy Bison for the evening while Joel stayed home with Patrick when you spotted Ellie in town. 

“Ellie, do you have a second?” You ask her. She shrugs, “Sure”, here we go again with the stale conversation but you were going to really try. 

“I was just wondering if you would be coming to Patrick’s first Birthday? It’s not a big thing just us, Tommy, Maria, Molly and Jesse who is bringing Dina. I just thought with your friends coming, it would be nice if you did?” Ellie doesn’t say anything, “I know Patrick would love to see you too” you finish.

Ellie is fidgeting with the string of her hoodie while she mulled over her answer, all she could say is that she would “Think about it” and that was better than nothing. 

“I still cant believe this little man is a year old - and didn’t I tell you he would be walking?” Joel smiled. To say Patrick was completely walking would be an exaggeration but he was able to take a few steps on his own. It was a little bit like how he said Patrick’s first words was “Pa” but you hadn’t heard him. Molly, Tommy and Maria all arrived at the same time in the late afternoon. 

You were finishing up on the food and Patrick was sat with his Aunts and Uncle. That was when the door went, “I’ll get it” you called as Joel was still setting up the record player. You open the door to Jesse, Dina and to your surprise Ellie. You invite them all in smiling, Ellie hangs back behind Jesse and Dina looking slightly uncomfortable. “Thank you for coming Ellie, it means so much you’re here” you whisper to her.

“It would have looked too odd to the others if I hadn’t”” she says. When you and Ellie join the rest of the group, Joel looks like he saw a ghost but Ellie just gives everyone a general hello.

Patrick who was currently sat on the floor with Jesse, pulls himself up and begins taking small steps toward Ellie reaching out for her. 

“Look at you” Ellie smiles at him and picks up the growing child, “Walking all on your own, you’re getting so big”. 

Dina puts a paper crown she made for Patrick on his head during dinner, she made one similar for Ellie a few years back. Tommy had brought his camera, “lets get a photo of the Birthday boy”, he perches directly in front of Patrick who was sat in Joel’s lap. “Tell you what, why don’t we get one of the family” he suggested pointing at you and Ellie, he knew what he was doing here. Ellie began to protest but Tommy had a way of insisting that made it difficult to argue, both you and Ellie stand behind Joel. It takes Patrick reaching up for Ellie to make her smile enough to take the photo. Once dinner was over and Patrick was down for the night, you headed to your drinks trolley. 

“Well I think it’s about time we cracked open this one” you sigh picking up a bottle of whisky Joel had found a while back. 

“Y/N now that aint cheap stuff, if we” Joel begins but before he could finish Tommy has taken the bottle from your hand, “I think so too” he laughs and begins to pour everyone a drink. A few drinks later and the discussion turns to birthdays, “What is everyones best Birthday” asks Dina.

Tommy starts “One year before everything went to shit. I had always wanted to just get on a Harley and drive, don’t know where. So that’s what we did, Joel arranged it and we just took off. That was a great day” he smiled thinking back on it. Everyone else’s stories are a little less exciting and then it gets to Ellie. 

“Come on Ellie, everyone else has told us theirs” Dina egged her on. 

Ellie huffs slightly and takes another sip of her drink before starting her story, “I guess a couple of years ago” she begins, her fingers picking at the rim of her glass. “Joel had found this museum. It was full of these dinosaurs and this space exhibition. There was this replica shuttle we were able to climb into, it had the buttons, joystick, everything. He passed me this tape and told me to listen to it” she explained. Joel’s eyes had been on Ellie the entire time she had been speaking. “What was on the tape?” asked Jesse, Ellie looked up at him and then to Joel. “He had found the Apollo 11 landing on tape for me” she said quietly. Everyone was pretty quiet for a minute. 

“I’d love to hear that one time” Jesse smiled and then everyone went back to chatting. Ellie got up from the table, said she was feeling tired and that maybe she had drank too much before leaving for the night. It had been short lived but it had been a somewhat nice moment. You whisper to Joel and if he is okay once Ellie had left for the night. “Yep” he said his voice slightly cracking. 

“After those two stories, I think you are going to have to up your game for my next Birthday” you chirp and nudge him slightly in an attempt to lighten his mood. It didn’t really work. 

[darlingsdevil]

Of The Valley (Joel x Reader)

Chapter 3: Slipping Back

Summary: Life in Jackson is never easy. Consoling angsty teenagers, wading through the mysterious waters of Joel’s romance language and with a child of your own on the way? Life

Chapter summary: A concert. Stew. Back to the old routine.

Of The Valley Masterlist

RDR2 Masterlist

Taglist (please comment to be added or removed): @sidepuff @joelsheartache @fangirl-inthe-us @cowboyfrazer @scarletpines

A/N: This chapter is.. more of a filler. It just got so long, I didn’t want to rush next chapter. Which is.. a big one.

•••

You were reading a magazine when Ellie, Joel and Tommy got back. Something about fashion trends in the 80’s, you weren’t too interested though. You had finished your candy bar ages ago, wondering just how much candy Mark had hidden here.

Their loud arrival caused you to jump, you were so caught up in your magazine you briefly forgot where you were. Ellie was the first one through the door, you went up to greet them.

“Ellie, it’s been awhile,” You smiled at her, bringing her in for a hug. Ellie looked older, you were surprised, you had thought she stopped growing. That little girl was getting too old for your liking.

“It has been. I have some new tricks I want to show you on the guitar,” Ellie said. You looked to Joel. You knew they were having problems before, Joel never really mentioned why, teenagers were a complicated bunch regardless. You remembered all the teenage angst from your years too, it seems the apocalypse hadn’t taken that trope out of the remnants of society though.

“Any new songs you’ve learned?” You asked. Tommy and Joel walked to the kitchen, leaving you with Ellie by the door.

“Yeah. I’ve written a few actually,” Ellie said sheepishly.

“Played them for Cat yet?” You winked at her with a smug look on your face, talking quietly so Joel would not hear. Ellie blushed and looked down.

“No.” She shook her head, trying to hide her blushing face.

“Well come on, I want to hear some new songs you’ve learned,” You said, leading her to the couch. You sat down and waited for her to get her guitar. It was becoming easier and easier to forget that you were outside of Jackson. You were still shook up, but it was easy to pretend you weren’t. Fake it till you make it, right?

She sat across from you on the armchair and picked up her guitar. Tommy and Joel were talking about something in the kitchen, but you couldn’t quite make it out.

“How many songs have you written since I’ve last seen you?” You leaned back into the chair, waiting for her to begin playing.

Ellie shrugged, “Three or so? I don’t write very often. I write lyrics a lot, but I don’t really write music for it.”

“Okay, well, play me the song you like the best, newly learned or original.”

Ellie nodded and rested her hands on the guitar, waiting to play.

“I know you’ve heard this song. Maybe it will even be better than the original.” Ellie looked at you before she began playing.

“It’s always better acoustic.”

“I’m sure I’ll woo you with my melodic voice then, and my guitar skills,” Ellie joked with a twinkle in her eye. It had been a long time since you’ve seen the spark in that girl’s eye. You remembered when she was younger, a fresh new face at Jackson and a wild thing. There was a lot to catch up on with her. Guilt struck you as you realized you had not only abandoned Joel, but Ellie too.

Ellie began playing a song, you immediately recognized it.

“Ain't no sunshine when she's gone,” Ellie sang, focusing on the chords. You leaned forward, resting your head on your hand, watching her intently. Ellie was a good singer. You always looked forward to her mini concerts.

“It's not warm when she's away

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

And she's always gone too long

Anytime she goes away.” She continued playing. You smiled at her as she looked up, encouraging her to continue.

It was a song you always enjoyed. You had a Bill Withers record at your house. Mark loved Bill Withers, he used to play that record nonstop. Even used to beg the party organizers at the seasonal dances to play it for him.

When Ellie finally finished, you clapped for her, a bittersweet smile through it all.

“That’s a really good song. Mark really likes it,” You told her.

“Yeah, he’s played that record for me a few times.”

“I actually have a few records to give you. Mark decided he didn’t want them anymore,” You said.

Ellie’s eyes immediately lit up, “Which ones?”

“I’ll let you pick out a few once we get back to Jackson,” You promised.

“Anyone I want?” She questioned, making sure you weren’t lying.

“Anyone you want. Except for Bill Withers, Mark would probably chop your head off,” You repeated back.

“And Mark’s okay with me taking his stuff?” Ellie raised her brow.

You nodded, Ellie smiled.

“That’s awesome. Mark’s got a big collection,” Ellie replied, setting her guitar to rest on the couch. She leaned back onto the couch.

You looked over your shoulder to Joel and Tommy. Tommy was gathering things from the refrigerator to make a stew.

“You’re not touching this stew, Joel, pretty sure you would manage to burn water.” You heard Tommy say, you looked over at Ellie and she confirmed Tommy’s comment. It was true, Joel was an awful cook.

“Which is why I’m leaving it up to you,” Joel said to Tommy. You got up and walked over to them.

“What type of stew are you making, Tommy?” You asked him. If they were making stew, it meant you would most likely be staying the night here — or at least for dinner.

“Vegetable. Nobody brought meat up here,” Joel replied. There was rarely ever food in the lookouts, even as big as this one was. There were supposed to be supplies brought up monthly to each lookout, either someone ate all of it or it was never brought up.

“Ah, good old vegetable stew,” You said sarcastically.

“Something wrong with it?” Tommy quipped.

“No, just wish I was back at the bar eating a sandwich right about now.” You shook your head.

“Can’t go wrong with a sandwich,” Ellie called out, flipping through the magazine you were reading earlier. Joel laughed lightly. Ellie and Joel were growing farther and farther apart, it was normal for a father and daughter to have a rocky relationship, especially at her age, you just hoped it didn’t last into her adulthood. Joel mentioned it to you once. You had been meaning to ask Ellie about it, but you got sidetracked.

••

Time passed quickly, soon enough you had forgotten all about what had happened in the morning, that was until Tommy asked if you wanted to go out again to finish off the rest of the infected. It was easy to get caught up in the normalcy of your friends, especially while in the comfort of a lookout, but outside there was a raging storm of pain and suffering, and you were caught in the midst of it all.

You were reluctant to leave the lookout, it was a good idea to face your fears in theory, but terrifying when actually going through with it. Tommy assured you everything would be fine, but you weren’t entirely convinced.

“I don’t know, Tommy,” You sighed while you threw away the rest of Mark’s stash that you had brought out for Tommy, Joel and Ellie to enjoy. There was a confectioner in town who made chocolates, Mark was always there buying candy. You found three candy bars, a box of caramels, chocolate covered pretzels and some peanut butter fudge. You wondered how it had managed to not spoil, but more so wondering how Mark had bought that much candy and hid it from you.

“It’ll be easy. Joel will go out with you,” Tommy assured.

“I don’t know, Tommy,” You said quietly, glancing over to Joel with Ellie. Joel was showing Ellie some trick on the guitar.

“I already told him to back off a little, he should be fine,” Tommy replied. Joel was angry, upset, you weren’t sure he would be as understanding.

“Why can’t you just go with me?”

“You haven’t talked to Joel in three months, I think you two need to do something catching up.”

You sighed. That was true. There was a lot to discuss, you just weren’t sure where to start on any of it.

“You guys better not start eating without us, Tommy,” You said, walking towards Joel. The stew would be done soon.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Y/N.”

•••

You knew the spot where the infected were at. They were usually up there this time of the year, it was about a ten minute walk from the lookout. The walk on the way there was silent, but you could tell Joel was waiting to say something.

“What is it Joel?” You finally ask, looking over your shoulder at him. He held his rifle tightly to his chest.

“Nothing.”

“You’re not acting like it’s nothing.”

Joel sighed before speaking, “I just want to know why you have been avoiding me, avoiding everyone for the past three months.”

“I wasn’t deliberately avoiding you. I just.. I got busy,” You said quietly with a sigh. Today was just one big headache.

“Okay. Can you tell me why you wanted me to come out here?” Joel replied softly. He was being suspiciously comforting.

“I need someone I trust up here.” It was a vague answer. In case things went south, you would much rather be comforted by Joel like he had so many times for you before, then Tommy or Ellie. Tommy and Ellie were like family, but they did not compare in the way that Joel did.

“I guess that is fair.” You knew he had questions, you would answer them when you were ready.

You continued walking for a little while. It was hard to imagine yourself ever shooting a gun normally again. It would be a constant reminder of what had happened. You knew what you needed to do, you knew you had to do it, to put it simply, it was a job that needed to be done regardless of your stance on it. It was still a question as to why you were needed for a simple job like this, you would have to get it out of Tommy later. Maybe Ellie knew something too, you suspected the least.

Joel was off your case, for at least a little while it seemed. You knew he was confused, you knew he had questions. It was all one step at a time, and now you were out here facing your fears that had crippled you for months. It was insane to say the least.

The small area devoid of trees came into view. It overlooked a group of houses and a gas station. You took out your binoculars as you came closer to the ledge, looking out towards the buildings. There were a group of infected, just like you had thought. Fifteen or so. It would only take you a short while to pick them all off, that was if the job went on without a hitch.

You could feel your hands shaking even as you slung the rifle off your shoulder. Heart pounding so loud you were sure Joel could hear it too.

“Now this is a one person job,” You laugh nervously. Joel eyed you cautiously as he leaned against the tree behind the ledge.

It was now or never. As much as you wanted to throw the rifle off the cliff edge, run straight back home with your tail between your legs, you knew you couldn’t. You owed Maria. You owed her more than one simple job. You had to do it.

You swallowed your fears, telling yourself to just fuck it and shoot the damn things like you always used to. But ‘fuck it’ wasn’t going to cut it this time. It would take more than that.

“Joel?” You asked, facing the cliff edge, overlooking the terrain where nature had reclaimed the earth.

Joel hummed in response.

“If I do this, can we go out to the lake again?” You looked at him, your eyes saying everything that needed to be said.

Joel nodded, a small smile on his lips. Joel was beginning to piece it all together, there was a reason you were so shook up by being out here. Avoiding him for three months, something had definitely happened like Tommy had said. Besides, Joel owed you a trip back to the lake regardless. He didn’t mind taking you out for the day, he just hoped Mark wouldn’t be around when he did.

You bit your lip, and swiveled around to face the group of infected below. Taking a deep breath, you pulled your rifle up to your shoulder and put a bullet into the chamber.

You blinked away any intruding thoughts and focused on the task at hand. If you did this, you had a date with Joel, a chance to repair any relationship you had with him prior to the incident. It was easy, you had done this a million times before, you reassured yourself.

Hesitatingly, you looked out into the scope, raising your rifle so your bullet would hit its mark. You focused on a clicker next to a building. It was standing still, an easy shot. You pushed the air out of your lungs and pulled the trigger. The bang went off and your mind went into a frenzied panic, as if your brain was screaming out and only you could hear it, but you weren’t listening to this time. The recoil was barely noticeable.

You repeated the action. It was easier than the first. You slipped into that role of a seasoned sniper quicker than you thought you would have. It was muscle memory now. The runner you took down fell with a bullet between its eyes. Even Joel let out an impressed whistle. That memory was an inkling in the back of your mind now.

Then you shot another, and another, and another until there was all but one. A runner, newly infected by the looks. Not quite battered or bloodied as the others and the clothes looked fresher. At least a month or two before it had been turned. You wondered who the person was before they became infected, what their story was. But it didn’t matter, you were here to protect your town and put the infected out of its misery.

You loaded your gun and aimed at the infected. The infected head twitched in unnatural ways a few times before it looked your way, seemingly staring at you for a split second until you shot it. It’s body fell to the ground, blood pouring out of the wound, you aimed for the head, but only shot the stomach. Cursing yourself, you loaded another bullet.

This time, the infected look straight up at you again. Your breath hitched in your throat, you knew it wasn’t truly looking, it just happened to look your way. You wanted to put it out of its suffering as quickly as possible.

But god, did it look like him. It laid the same way he did. This time though, you hesitated, perhaps it would die on its own. You waited a few seconds as it twitched and thrashed on the ground, realizing it wouldn’t die too easily. The bullet hit its mark and the infected became a lifeless body.

You grimaced at the sight of the carnage below. At least it was over. You were getting better at controlling your panic, earlier today was a mistake, a slip up. But truth be told, you felt like the life had been sucked out of you at the sight of the runner.

“Goodjob,” Joel said, patting you on the back, pulling you back into reality. You immediately jumped at the feeling.

“Jesus, Joel, you scared the shit out of me,” You pant out.

“You knew I was there,” Joel replied slowly.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Just scared me, that's all.”

Joel nodded, “Okay, well let’s head back, I’m sure the stew is done.”

“Sure thing.”

You couldn’t help but remember how that runner stared at you. Perhaps it remembered for a brief moment who it was, begging you to shoot it. Maybe there was still a person inside, waiting for the moment to be freed while the disease ran rampant outside, controlling its every movement. The look it gave you reminded you of someone you knew. The reason you were so scared to be out here in the first place.

•••

[starlessskies94]

Consequence (Joel Miller x OC)

Summary: What if Joel survived his injuries from the Abby and Fireflies attack but ends up with really bad amnesia. He can’t remember his wife, Ellie, or the Outbreak; only before. How will his family bring back the man they once knew?

Pairing: Joel Miller x OC

Note: Okay this is a big one, I wrote this over the course of like 3 days I think? Anyway I hope you like it because it's probably the longest chapter I've ever written for one of my stories <3

Chapter One

It was just five in the morning when Adaline Miller woke up. Her head still a little groggy from a decent night’s sleep and her fading dreams. She turned to see Joel still asleep beside her; his gentle snores muffled into his pillow. She smiled and leaned over kissing his bare shoulder before rolling out of bed to get ready for her day.

Stepping downstairs towards the kitchen, Ada realised just how cold it was when she noticed how frosted over the windows had become overnight. Ada hated winter. It was her least favourite season. After everything that had happened almost five years ago it wasn’t hard to understand why. Even now she still sometimes had nightmares about it.

Waking up to find Joel cold in his bed; his stomach wound torn open. Blood everywhere. Or finding Ellie beaten and bruised, left alone in that burned out restaurant.

Joel had always been there to console her, holding her until she calmed down. His voice low to just a whisper as he told her everything was okay. She was safe. He was there and he wasn’t ever going to leave.

It was a comfort she appreciated even after being married to the man for just under four years.

Stepping through into the kitchen, the brunette quickly got to work preparing some eggs on the stove for breakfast before moving across the counter to make up a pot of coffee for herself and Joel. She still wasn’t totally sure what her husband had traded for the beans; but Joel had seemed rather embarrassed by it for some reason. Though after finally getting to taste coffee again after so long, she didn’t much care she supposed. After the hot water was boiled she poured the beverage out, setting aside Joel’s favourite owl mug for when he came down.

Joel had always been an early riser and more often than not, he was almost always the one that beat her to the kitchen in the morning. It had taken some time after settling in Jackson to actually get the man to finally relax a little. It was unfortunate for Ada that he had taken that to mean ‘no sleeping in past seven’. Even on days off, Joel was up before the sun. Lucky Ada had found her own ways to at least keep him in bed past seven on those days; sleeping or otherwise. Thankfully Joel never complained.

Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the creaking of the stairs as Ada glanced up to meet eyes with Joel. His arms stretched above his head and suppressing a yawn. He stepped through the door, his hand dropping to scratch at his bearded chin.

“Morning darlin’.” Joel slurred, heading straight for his coffee mug. “Hold on...why are you dressed already?” Ada questioned. Her egg covered spoon gesturing at him in his winter gear. Joel followed her gaze, his brows raised in confusion. “I thought you weren’t on patrol until this afternoon.” She clarified.

“Oh yeah...forgot to tell you last night. Change of plans. Tommy’s gotten word of a horde gathering near the ski lodge.” He explained between sips, leaning against the counter, crossing one foot over the over. “Reckon we needed to deal with it quickly before it gets to be a problem.”

Ada pouted but said nothing, her gaze turning from Joel back to her scrambled eggs on the stove. Joel sighed abandoning his mug on the side as he moved across towards her. His arms wrapping around her waist and resting his chin over her shoulder.

“I can hear you thinking.” He said lowly into her ear. But again Ada said nothing. He sighs moving to kiss her neck but she turns her head away as he does.

He hates this. He hates when she worries. It’s always the same routine when he heads out for clean up duty. Clearing out infected is never an easy job but it is what keeps Jackson safe. They both know that. But still whenever he’s due to leave for another job, Ada goes quiet. She’s distant and he fucking hates it.

It was the same when Ellie first asked to train for patrol, they’d been reluctant. And while they were both well aware of Ellie’s skills and her strength; it was still hard watching their baby girl in such a hurry to go out alone without them.

His arms around her waist squeeze gently as he pulls her close to his chest, his head over her shoulder stealing a kiss on her cheek.

“Baby please stop worrying, I’ll be fine.” He knew it was a foolish thing to promise because the world they lived in wasn’t safe. You never knew what the next day would bring. But if there was anything in this world Joel would find to fight for; it was coming home to his wife. His family.

Ada dumped the cooked eggs onto the plates laid out, they were a little burned on the edges. She hadn’t been paying that much attention to them if she was honest. Then turned in her husband’s arms to face him.

“Back by dinner or I kick your ass.” She warned playfully. “Deal.” He chuckled, pulling her close as their lips met in a kiss.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It didn’t take long for Ada to get to the stables when she’d finished breakfast. After reluctantly pulling herself from Joel’s arms; they’d both parted ways as the older man went to meet his brother at the gate.

She’d quickly threw herself into her list of jobs for the day, hoping it would take her mind off her worry.

“Morning Max.” She smiled at the stable hand, walking through to the back room. “Mornin’ Ada, whadda we got today?” he grinned in reply, his frame leaning through the door as she tidied her workspace. Collecting all her notes and paperwork together.

“Well Daisy has been lame for a couple days so she needs to stay on box rest. Then I need King and Blue tacked up before noon.” She explained, her eyes never leaving the sheets of paper in her hand. “Bob and Maggie are headed out on patrol so they need them ready before half twelve.”

“You got it boss!” Max assured with a joyful grin, sending her a mock salute. She chuckled at the old man as he disappeared from the doorway, but she quickly caught up to him, catching herself on the wooden frame.

“Oh! Could you also take Barnaby out into the paddock this morning please? He had a touch of colic yesterday and I want to keep his gut moving to make sure it’s passed.” She explained. Max simply nodded and turned to make a start on his duties. Ada always liked Max. He was an older gentleman, around seventy years old but still incredibly fit for his age. He’d arrived in Jackson a few years after herself, Ellie and Joel. Along with his grandsons from somewhere near Montana. Having the experience of running his own ranch before the Outbreak; he’d been the perfect fit to help Ada run the stables and take care of the horses.

She continued through until around nine o’ clock, just making the finishing touches to the poultice she’d wrapped around the gelding’s leg she was treating. “There ya go buddy.” She cooed sweetly, giving the horse a soft scratch behind the ears as he nickered in reply.

“Morning Ada!” A familiar voice greeted as the brunette moved to close the stable door closed behind her. “Morning Dina, you out on patrol this morning?”

“Yep, heading out on the creek trails with Ellie.” She smiled, Ada quickly returning it as they both looked to Ellie walking through the door. “How’s my boy?” Dina asked, grabbing Ada’s attention once again.

“Oh he’s fine, Japan had a little mud fever but I think we got it under control now. He’s good to go. All tacked up for you with Max down there.” Dina gave her a quick thumbs up and threw a thanks over her shoulder as she ran down towards the back of the barn. Leaving the woman alone with her adoptive daughter who slowly trailed behind.

“Good morning sunshine. How are you feeling this morning?” She teased. Ellie rolled her eyes at her mother’s smirk.

“Oh jeez don’t. I already got half the town giving me weird looks.” She whined. After the dance the night before, her kiss with Dina, Seth drunk and aggressively harassing the girls; it had certainly been the talk of the town the following morning. Ellie was just hoping she could outlive the embarrassment.

“So you and Dina patrolling together huh? That should be interesting. Have you talked to her yet?” “Ugh mom stop!” Ellie hissed softly, her lips twitching into a subtle smile.

“What? I like her, she’s a sweet girl. You two would be so cute together.” The teen stifled a giggle as she playfully shoved her mom’s shoulder, the older woman chuckling in return. “Shut up.”

The laughter faded when Ada sighed in thought, Ellie glancing back knowing what was coming next. Her gaze immediately falling to her feet.

“You uh...you talk to Joel yet?” She asked cautiously. For the past two years; it had been a sore subject for Ellie whenever Ada brought Joel up in conversations. After finding out the truth back in Salt Lake; she’d been so angry at both of them for everything they had kept from her. But after learning that Joel had been the one that pulled the trigger. That one that had made that decision for all of them and acted alone, she’d declared she wanted nothing more to do with him. And while it had been hard for Ada to be stuck in the middle; she’d still tried her damn hardest to build a bridge between them.

“A little...but one conversation isn’t going to fix everything.” She mumbled. Her foot kicking at the mud covered floor, eyes never leaving the ground.

“It’s a start though. Baby he really misses you.” she said. “I know. I still don’t know if I can forgive him for what he did though. But I am willing to try.” Ellie said softly, her hands now pulling at her jacket sleeves. “I uh...I was thinking of maybe inviting him over for a movie night tomorrow. If that’s okay?”

Ada smiled at this. It had been hard with Ellie not speaking to Joel for so long, watching the man she loved struggle with losing a daughter that no longer wanted anything to do with him. It was obvious he was hurting even if he never said the words out loud. He missed Ellie, he’d be so grateful to hear she wanted to do movie night again, for the first time in so long.

“Of course it is. When you get back from patrol we’ll figure something out okay? Joel’s out with Tommy but he should be back by dinner.”

Ellie simply nodded with a timid smile before turning towards Max waiting with Shimmer.

“Hang on, gotcha some lunch. I still worry you ain’t eating enough.” Ada shouted after her, reaching into her backpack to hand her daughter the pack of food she’d prepared.

“Thank you!” Dina called before Ellie had the chance to reply, swiping the pack out of Ada’s hand. “Hey! She said my lunch!” Ellie poked in jest. The teen simply scoffed peaking through the bag to see what was inside. “Our lunch...there’s plenty for both of us. Let’s see; turkey sandwiches, nice.” Dina continued snooping through the pack while Ellie merely rolled her eyes as Ada stood with folded arms smirking at the two. They really were cute together.

“Oh shit! No way, Ellie there’s cookies in here! Awesome! Thanks Ada!”

Ada laughed at Dina’s joy as Ellie reluctantly followed behind, snatching the packed lunch back and stuffing it into her bag before Dina could complain.

“Ugh I haven’t had cookies since I was a kid. I fucking love your mom, she’s just the best.” Dina complimented as she mounted Japan, taking the reins and walking the gelding out into the snow, Ellie not far behind on Shimmer. The young girl turned back to take one last glance at her mother brushing down another horse, a smile lighting up her face.

“Yeah, yeah she is.” Ellie agreed.

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After such an early start, Ada was pleased when the day was beginning to draw to an end. She’d not stopped the whole day and she was tired.

When the time came to feed and bed down the horses for the night, she was more than ready to head home, eat dinner, maybe snuggle up to Joel on the couch to watch a movie and call it a day. She’d already sent Max home to his boys when she finished up the last of her routine checks to close up the barn; when she’d been ambushed by both Jesse and Dina.

They both looked terrified, Dina with tear stained cheeks and Jesse breathless and shell shocked like he’d just run for miles without taking a second to breathe.

The brunette couldn’t remember much of what was said when they’d bombarded her with information. Only that something bad had happened and it had happened to Joel.

A thousand thoughts had rushed through her head at once. A flash of images muddled with the white noise that squealed in her ears the closer she ran towards the infirmary. Her nightmare was coming true and she felt like she was drowning. Lost in a dark ocean of uncertainty, falling without a lifeline to hold on to.

When she burst through the doors, Tommy was the first to reach her. She winced aghast at seeing his injuries. His swollen black eye, the deep bloodied gash on his forehead. She felt numb as her brother in law explained what had happened. What those bastards had done to her husband. Shot and beaten mercilessly. Her heart ached, her eyes raw from the tears she’d cried. And what made the whole thing worse, was that Ellie had been there to see the whole thing.

Ada had tried to brace herself before stepping into Joel’s room, her hand trembling as she reached for the handle. Ellie was sat slumped over his bedside, her hand clinging to his as he lay unconscious. The scuff of her mother’s boots grabbing her attention as she rose to her feet and met her halfway when Ada rushed towards her with open arms.

“Mom!” Ellie whimpered and it reminded her all too much of that night all those years ago. Ada squeezed her eyes shut as she pulled Ellie closer, her heart beating in her ears.

“Oh baby girl.” She soothed, her hand gently stroking her back for comfort. “I tried…” Ellie hiccuped. “I tried to stop them. I begged them to stop but they wouldn’t listen. And I told Joel to get up, just fucking get up.” Her voice broke as the girl choked back another sob and Ada couldn’t help her own tears as she listened silently. Gently guiding Ellie back to Joel’s bedside so she could sit, all the while the mother never once letting go of her daughter.

“I told him to get up, but it was like he’d just given up.” She explained quietly. Her shaking hands reaching up to wipe at her sore bloodshot eyes. Her cheeks and nose reddened from her tears. “The doctor said he needs to be asleep for a while, something about something needing time to settle?! I don’t fucking know!” She shouted in frustration, almost collapsing from exhaustion in her chair.

Ada merely nodded solemnly. Tommy had partly explained before she’d rushed to Joel. The doctor had insisted on keeping Joel sedated to give the brain time to heal itself while the swelling subsides. Ada just hoped it wouldn’t take too long for him before he was able to wake up.

As the night drew on Ellie had finally given in to her fatigue, stretching on the old beat up couch in the corner of the room. Tommy had thoughtfully brought her a blanket and a bag of clothes for the girls before heading home himself, Ada swearing that she would send Ellie the second they had any news on his brother.

It wasn’t until then that Ada had the still and the silence of the night did she truly take in Joel’s injuries. His leg, broken and mangled. It had been a damn miracle that they’d even be able to save it. But there had been a reasonable amount of confidence it would eventually heal, though Joel would definitely have some difficulty getting around at first and most likely a permanent limp afterwards; he was damn lucky in that respect.

His head injuries however were a different story. There were still flecks of dried blood in patches of his dark head where the club had struck. Patches of hair cut away, close to the scalp in order to reach the violent blows into his crown. Deep cuts and dark bruises covered his handsome face. A good chunk of his ear was missing, she’d noticed as she softly brushed her fingers through his hair in a feeble attempt to clean him up. It had been treated and neatly stitched but would most likely leave a scar.

Her lips trembled as a quiet sob worked its way up into her throat, her eyes blurred from the welling tears the longer she looked at him.

She should have been there...Why hadn’t she been there?!

The days went by and Joel still hadn’t woken up. The doctor took him off sedation a few days after the attack, in the hopes he would come around on his own. The endless nights slowly dragging by, each holding with it a suffocating pause that felt to be drawing out longer and longer. Like the string of a bow, pulling tighter and tighter until it was closely reaching its breaking point, a moment of holding strong until it was too much to bear.

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It had been exactly nine days later when Joel eyelids flickered. His fingers twitched and convulsed as he finally began to regain consciousness.

A string of mumbles and panicked gasps uttered from his dry lips as he stirred awake. And Ellie and Ada were right there beside him. The young girl skidding on her heel as she took off through the door in order to grab Tommy.

“Joel? Can you hear me?” Ada asked delicately. Her heart beating rapidly in her chest. Tentatively reaching out to place her hand upon his as he moved to face her with squinted eyes.

“Wher...Where?” He tried to speak. His voice low and rough like gravel. It strained against his dry throat. Ada quickly moving to his bedside to help him drink from the glass of water placed beside him.

He winced but managed a few mouthfuls before lowering himself back down against his pillow. His tired eyes darted around the room, breath quickening and short the more the confusion set in as to how he’d ended up there.

“You're in the infirmary. You were out with Tommy and were attacked.” Ada explained carefully, Joel’s eyes drifting back towards her sat by his bedside. “Was anyone else hurt?” He asked. “Tommy got roughed up a little, bump on the head and a black eye. Couple of bruised ribs but he’ll be fine.”

Joel simply nodded at the information. His eyes never leaving Ada.

“Is Sarah okay? I assume she’s with Tommy, could you call her? Tell her I’m okay…” He spoke so casually, Ada almost didn’t hear what he’d said. But yet there was no change in his eyes as he asked the question. “How long do you reckon till I can head home?”

This question made Ada stop cold. Her heart slowing and her breath catching in her throat.

“Joel... do you know who I am?”

He looked at her like she was crazy, the confusion met in the touching of his dark brows creasing with his forehead. “Yeah, you’re my doctor.”

It was at that moment Ada almost collapsed. When she realised there was truly no hint of recognition in Joel’s eyes as he stared at her.

Her worst fear realised; her own husband saw her as a stranger.

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Helplessly Hoping (Favored Ones, Part 19.)

Series description: Many things were surely fucked up in the year 2038, but no-one ever told anyone how all of it went down. What happened before a group of people left for Seattle to handle personal matters? Why did one girl refuse to leave all of it be? And why there were so many dead in the end?

Quote for the chapter: “And you consider yourself the saviour of the human race?” - Shawn James

Part summary: Just as Ellie demanded, there was the whole meeting about the fucking Baldwin cottage situation happening. And the results of it were more or less concerning.

A/N: I’ve tried to use as many in-game/trailer/promotional dialogue as I could, altering it to suit the story, and I’ve spent at least an hour alone on those dialogues (finding them in the first place, then re-writing it, altering it, etc.). Hope you’ll enjoy. (OPEN TAGS FOR FUNNY HAHA JOKE)

Warnings: Tommy is the purest of heart and the dumbest of ass, Jesse’s ass, and angry fucking Maria. Mentions of Abby, WLFs, torture and gore, anxiety. PROBABLY A LOAD OF TYPOS Y’ALL.

Word count: 7.3K

Tagging:   @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme​​ @peakymarvels​​ @davnwillcome​ @pickleriiick​ @jodiereedus22​ @gladiosamicitias​ @tamkashi​ @eternallyvenus​ @avengerssstuff​ @fangirl-inthe-us​ @avery-miller​ @mikah-writes​ @mad-hatter-98​ @sadiaafrin99​ @flavorishy​ @mr-robot-x​ @

Series master list: H E R E

Joel Miller’s playlist for the bonfire occasions: H E R E

Youtube playlists: JACKSON DAYS | SEATTLE DAYS

Early spring of 2038, two days before departure to Seattle:

Learning how to walk on your legs again was kinda funny, especially when you had Joel and Ellie around most of the time. As suspected, Joel calmed down about the unnecessary fight rather quickly, focusing on more oppressing matters at that moment, inviting Ellie to look after you when he was gone and the other way around. You were still noticeably climbing, but soon, you could walk to downtown on your own and you didn't even have to beg Joel to stop for a sec to catch your breath.

Ellie, no matter how hard she tried to ignore it, was still intrigued by the fact that you and Joel are now an official couple, but that didn't mean she had got the right to tell someone what to do. And she didn't even want to... It was just... Bothering her at some times. But as long as you were looking healthy and happy with the old man, she could still get over the whole situation somehow. The bad blood between you and Dina lasted for a few days until you played a card game for spending the evening with Ellie, which you one singlehandedly, yet you showed your character and told Dina she can keep your best friend for the night.

Life almost seemed to be going back to normal... Except it wasn't going anywhere. The only people who knew about it was you, Joel, Maria, and Tommy. You didn't want to tell Ellie and you hoped that your whole mental situation will be over before you and she have some girly plans. On many occasions, you've woken up in the middle of the night, straightaway paralyzed. A single muscle on your body couldn't move and all you saw was the woman looking down on you, asking the question over and over again - where is Joel Miller? Do you know him?

And anything you've tried wasn't helping you. Pills that should give you a sleepless night? You woke up in the middle of the night, panting and disoriented. Herbal teas? Made you sick. Joel hammering you to the bed before going to sleep? You've been staring at the ceiling as the man slept with his head on your naked chest. Joel and Ellie singing you a duet while you and Dina sat on the couch, watching these two arguing about every single detail? No, that didn't help either.

You didn't know if Abby wanted to trap you inside your head, but she accomplished the mission perfectly. You could work throughout the day, as long as the job didn't need a lot of walking around, you were still the same you. But as soon as no-one was looking at you, panic and anxiety got a hold on you. One time, you were even helping in the kitchen and you were joking around with the cooks - and suddenly, your gaze fell on one of the knives. Suddenly, you couldn't hear anything but cutting vegetables, and each of these sounds reminded you of the woman. The scar on your thigh started to burn as you suddenly sat in the corner, rocking yourself to keep calm.

There was still the old you inside of that head, but it wasn't quite the same person at all. You've been a former Firefly, yet you weren't on a single mission. You killed a human person before - just to protect the man you loved. What Abby has done to you was barbarism, brutality, and vileness. And that was bringing up the conflict inside of you around which you kinda could get your head wrapped around.

No-one knew what happened in the cottage yet, because you and Tommy wanted to think about the incident on your own first. And so you did - but it was tearing you up in halves. On one hand, you didn't care for that party of shitheads at all, you didn't want to see them again. You were just glad they had left, at least seemingly, and that they aren't a threat for you or Joel anymore.

On the other hand, you had the feeling that no matter who it was, they'll be back. They were searching after Joel and they didn't find the man the first time. Who was granting you that they won't come back for round two? This time killing you for good? Just slicing your throat for the fun of it? Another question was popping on your head rather frequently. Would Abby kill you straightaway if she'd figure out you're sleeping with Joel? Just for the fun of causing pain? Just to leave a message?

All you did was consider yourself lucky - if they wouldn't come when they did, you and Tommy would've laid there dead for hours, maybe days. But the luck was supposed to run out one day, right? It was just comforting you that it didn't run out on that March day. Normally, you weren't of these who would've sought revenge. You would just go on with your life, no matter how hard that would turn out to be. But Joel... When it came to Joel, the way you took the issues had changed. You wanted and needed to know he's safe. And until Abby and her friends were searching for the man, he wasn't safe.

I ain’t a good man at all, you know? You may be thinkin’ I am, but trust me, I ain’t. You could hear Joel repeating that sentence over and over again. I’ve done some terrible things and if you’d hear them, you’d most likely get up and never come back again. I was survivin’ for a damn long time. I’ve seen my friends end up dead. I’ve hurt many people. I’ve done stuff only the worst people do, you hear me? And Abby was just of the many people he’d done wrong or dirty in the past. The result of shit Joel had done.

But you hadn't got the feeling that Joel knew Abby personally. She was young, maybe at your age, just a few years older. Maybe exactly your age, it was hard to tell. But... If Abby had known Joel personally, she'd recognize Tommy. These men bared an undeniable likeness. So Joel wouldn't know who was she even if you'd ask him. The only thing you and Tommy took as a clue was the appliques on their jackets - WLF. Washington Liberation Front. They were soldiers just as you thought so. And came all the way from Seattle. To look for Joel. Which made you everything but calm. You asked Tommy about how Joel could've come to contact with such people... And Tommy didn't have a clue.

Which only put Joel's words in perspective. You didn't know a whole lot about your man and there wasn't any certainty that you'd ever get to know these things about him. What could Joel had possibly do tying up back to WLF? Smuggle guns, bomb, supplies? Kill someone for them..? Or one of them? Joel was a man of many faces and a harsh past, which you kinda knew ever since you got to know Ellie better. But it was things like these that put everything to context.

When you both agreed it's time to tell the rest, you've gathered only the closest people to discuss what to do now. Ellie and Dina's standpoints were set completely straight, they knew exactly what to do. Joel, Tommy, Jesse, and Maria were on the neutral to calm side of the spectrum. Diego was forbidden to come and you were somewhere between going after Abby and staying put. It was all to be settled down on that evening.

"So, we all know why were here." - You started, sitting at the head of the table next to Tommy. You two somehow got out of the situation WLFs put you in, but it was sure that you're not the same way you've been before - while you were only visibly limbing and some of the leg movements made you uneasy, you were fucked up mentally. Just as Tommy was perfectly healthy mentally, he told you he lived through worse things as a Firefly, his knee was poorly working as it should. Sure, he was walking, but there was no certainty that he can lead other patrols with his current physical state. - "And we decided that it will be better from my point of view because I heard a few things Tommy didn't." - You looked at the man, who nodded to assure you. - "Shall we?"

You've started since the very morning of the eighth of March - why did you even go to the patrol in the first place, how did the horde cleansing progress, up to the point where you first met her. When you mentioned her, tears appeared in your eyes again as you looked away from all the people to calm down. - "Give her a minute, it's just too much." - Tommy said to the rest as he walked to you with his cane in his hand, hugging your shoulder as he looked out of the window beside you. He shouldn't be walking at all, but because his knee wasn't drastically broken, he persuaded Bobby to give him just a brace and a cane. Either way, it was more than a month since the whole cottage thing, you both had got better. And sure, no-one was pressuring you to talk. You had the whole night if you needed to.

For you, it was a terrifying experience to go through all of this... Again. Mentally. It wasn't good for you to go back to the day in such details, but it needed to be done. Yet with every syllable, Abby's eyes got clearer and clearer inside of your head, watching you, judging you, laughing at you. The moment when she lifted you off the ground like a piece of shit, it was all there suddenly. Your throat clenched for a second while you re-lived through the memory, making your gasp for air and gently smooth the veins there. Tommy smoothed your shoulder carefully, looking at the profile of your face.

"Feelin' good now, kiddo?" - Tommy asked when you blinked twice to get yourself out of the moment. With a long sigh, you nodded and walked back to the table to continue with the story.

"There was a blizzard out there, you could barely see three feet in front of you. So the woman, named Abby, offered us to show us the way to a nearby cabin where she and her friends were taking refuge at the time. Naturally, we agreed to this offer because we would most likely get lost in the snow and freeze to death somewhere. Abby's friends saved us from a small portion of the horse, and they took us inside." -  You looked directly at Joel for a minute, trying to find comfort inside his face, finding concern only. That wasn't a good sign. - "When I stepped inside, I immediately noticed that there's something wrong with the people. I've seen a lot of groups passing through Jackson to get some sleep, gather supplies, food, water... But these didn't look anything like it. The clothes, moves, each of them looked strong. There was this lady who approached me and asked me if I'm feeling okay. To which I replied, that I am feeling alright.

I tried to signal Tommy that I don't feel safe inside that house, but he was talking to this Hispanic man, I didn't quite catch his name. So I played along and followed Abby deeper into the house. There, I met... Oscar? Omar? Oliver...? Owen. This man was Owen. And he was furious and they started to argue. For a reason, everyone started to gather in the room to look at us, and I could tell straight away that something was going downhill. Tommy was chatting with them and suddenly, Abby turned to me and asked me this question. I can hear the voice asking it every fucking night, again, again, and again. It haunts me." - A shaky breath left your lips as you jolted in discomfort. Tommy already knew what was coming, so he just stared at his hands entwined on the table.

"Do you know a man named Joel Miller by any chance?" - You repeated, hearing Abby asking you the question, staring down on you. You've been feeling everything you felt when Abby was just one foot away from you. The nerves, dry mouth, and the desperate need to keep yourself under control. And this time, it even felt harder than before, because you knew what comes next.

"To which I replied that I don't know any man by that name. But I fucked up, it is how it is. And I swear to you that this... Woman... Put her arm around my neck, picked me off the ground, and choked me. And all she said was 'Hey, we don’t wanna kill you. But we will.' And she tried to do just that. Before you guys came in." - A shiver ran down your spine as the picture of the woman kneeling beside you popped up inside your head. Owen holding the chair as Abby had beaten you up, helping her with the nails. Your hands were looking disgusting. Sure, it was way better and most of the nails started to grow back, but the ones on your pinkies and ring finger were gone.  

"What are we waiting for?" - Ellie asked suddenly, having every stare turned at her and Dina. She was visibly shaken - not only did they fucked you up like two dogs, but they were after Joel as well. - "Washington Liberation Front. We know where that is, don't we?" - The girl asked fiercely, but Maria pointed her palm at the girl, stopping her from hyping a super-dangerous plan which would only get everyone killed.

"Joel, when did you work for the WLF?" - Maria furrowed, looking at her brother-in-law. - "I thought you were smuggling for the Fireflies and other people back in Boston, but you never mentioned running the business in Seattle... Or in this area generally." - The woman asked silently, and each of you looked at Joel. But the man was out of his mind as well - it was his fault, just as he thought so. The past always found its way to him, didn't it?

"I've never worked in Seattle. I don't know any WLFs, never met 'em." - Joel answered shortly, looking down on his palms

"It doesn't matter. I don't care who the fuckers are, what did they want of what they need from the old man here. They've been trying to get one of us, what if they show up again?" - Ellie jumped straight to the chase again, this time standing up. - "They most likely know where we live, it doesn't take a genius to figure out the patrol trails, and they've been here once, what thing on Earth is holding them from getting into the area again? Huh? And what if they kill us all? What if they bring more people back? Huh?" - She looked at everyone with a hint of disgust in her face. This time, Tommy was the one to take a calm approach.

"Kiddo, sit down, will ya? We have no idea what we're walkin' into. You don't know anythin' about them. We don't know how large that group is, how armed they are," - "What are you doing?" - Ellie snapped back. The girl was walking on mighty thin ice, as Joel would say, but you got what she's after. These people were nothing but a threat to Jackson - and more importantly to Joel. You couldn't simply leave that be, hoping they won't come back. But you didn't say anything out loud, you just sat there and looked into the table desk, minding your own business.

"I don't care. Joel told me that this isn't my decision to make. Guess what, Tommy. It is from now on. These people tried to harm my family. I think you got the best idea about what kind of people they are. And I'm going no matter how you decide. You can't stop this. You can't stop me." - The girl walked out of the room, leaving you all there. Dina looked at Maria, who was already scheming a plan.

"This is suicide. No-one ain't is going after them. I don't care, I... I will put my men around her house to keep an eye on her..." - Maria was whispering frantically, trying to figure out what to do to keep the girl down. Joel exhaled loudly and took one look at you, closing his eyes in pain. He knew that empty look you were giving the piece of furniture. Whenever Ellie was about to take off, you will follow her for a few various reasons - you didn't want to get herself killed. And you didn't want to see Joel get hurt. And deep down inside, there was another reason which was the most understandable - you wanted to hurt back the people who hurt you. It could be barely seen that you're trembling, thinking about what you'll do. The world seemed to be so empty suddenly.

There was no other choice - you were going to Seattle.

"If she decides to go, Maria, no patrols are going to stop Ellie. The question is who will come with her." - Jesse told everyone quietly. With that, Joel had the last spark of home inside of him - maybe you won't be so stupid to agree with Ellie's short-fire plan. Yet when you closed your eyes, having a small wrinkle on your forehead, he knew that you're not the case.

Shortly after, everyone got home. And it felt off-putting to watch Joel's house, knowing you'll leave as soon as Ellie decides to go. You and Dina agreed about exchanging the intel the other day, once she and Ellie come up with some plan.

The house was looking way better than ever before. Up to that point, you never realized it has a perfect location in a good neighborhood. Especially, when Joel didn't have many neighbors. All you could see was the best ways to sneak to his door, and when you left that out, you only knew the inside of the house. And as the spring was slowly coming back, the flowers, bushes, and trees started to finally blossom after the long winter. Birds were singing the whole time you were walking to the porch, the warm wing was smoothing your skin and messing with your hair. How comes that you've never noticed the golden film of the sunlight? Or the innocent white of the evening clouds?

"You 'kay back there?" - Joel asked you from opening the door. You were leaning into the railing, watching the surroundings. After a small while of watching the man, you gave him a vulnerable smile and nodded. For a minute, Joel still stood there and waited for you to come in, but you didn't move an inch. You turned your head back to look at the neighborhood and the mountains in the landscape. That was when he walked next to you, leaning into the wood as well. - "What's goin' inside that head of yours, huh?" - He whispered, slowly pulling closer until your shoulders bumped into each other.

"Never noticed how beautiful Jackson can be - until now, cowboy." - An honest whisper left your lips. Joel didn't like your expression at all - there was this sadness and melancholy inside of it and Joel would bet everything that he knew exactly what was going on inside your head.

"Girl, if you're thinkin' about the Abby kiddo, stop it. For both my and yours sake. This kind of thoughts won't bring any good, you hear me?" - The man whispered and lowered his head enough to kiss the top of your shoulder. - "What happens at Baldwin, that stays at Baldwin. I don't want you to see you get near the stables, weaponry, you won't be sneakin' out at midnight, we clear?" - Joel asked, having you snickering at his statement and the whole topic. You knew you're about to pull that stunt. And he knew it as well. But it felt cute that he's putting so much care into this whole thing.

"I told you that I'm not thinking about the Baldwin cottage thing. I'm not. I'm just looking at nature, taking in the sights, you know?" - You smiled, trying to look at least a bit happy for Joel. The man looked into your eyes for a moment with an unnatural expression. But in the end, he nodded and looked away from you. Both of you knew that you're lying, but neither of you wanted to talk about the lie more closely. - "I was thinking about playing some gee-tar. What about you bringing me that instrument and making me a cup of coffee before we go to sleep, Joel?" - You asked after a moment, having the man realizing how vulnerable you were at the moment. He could just call you out about the bullshit. Yet he didn't. Joel just smoothed your back with his palm, pulling you a bit closer.

"You don't drink coffee. Didn't the coma messed with your brain, baby girl?" - The man asked but slowly walked to the door. You just sighed, reminding him of sugar. He brought everything anyway - both the guitars, both the mugs with the coffee and some fruits you could both snack on. The first songs you've played were shaky and off the rhythm, your voice wasn't the best either, which had you cringe a lot.

The man was calming you down, reminding you to have patience and not to jump into things too quickly. The best moment of the night was when you played A-Ha together, Joel playing the instrument while you curled up in the rocking chair, which he brought for you from the cabin in the woods, and sang. When the conversation you two had slowly faded away, you caught yourself falling asleep as Joel was playing with his guitar, playing parts of various songs you didn't even know. He had woken you up an hour or so after, making sure you won't be too bitten by mosquitos.

The following day, the signal you were waiting for came - Dina ran to you while you were helping in the kitchen and the diner. She told you, very hastily, that you will take off the following day, two hours after midnight, and that you'll have a meeting point at the south breach. Jesse, who was authorized to spy on both you and Dina, along with Ellie and Joel, had to see it because of course, he had. It was quite logical when you had a shift in the kitchen at the same time.

"What are you two whispering about, birdies?" - The boy leaned between your heads. If you had to be honest, he was looking good with the apron and a crooked smile on his lips as he held the bowl with the yeast dough. After a smile while of looking at him, you gave him your typical chuckle, getting back to the vegetables in front of you.

"About your ass." - You answered innocently. At that, Dina joined you, leaned her ass into the counted next to your workplace. Her eyes looked at her ex-boyfriend's ass shamelessly. After a moment, her agreeing hum sounded next to your ear as both you and Jesse snickered. - "I mean, Y/N's not wrong. Maybe you'll finally have your luck with Bobby now you're single?" - Dina asked, offering you a hand to do a high five. The boy looked at you with an offense in his grinning face, running his tongue along the line of his teeth.

"All I said is that the lady has a nice bottom. It was at the Christmas party, there was a lot of eggnogs and I was drunk. Don't ever bring that up again. Deal?" - Jesse pointed the wooden spoon at the two of you. Dina and you behaved childishly quite often, but it was never too inappropriate or annoying. You know where to put the stop to the whole playing-around thing.

"I certainly can't promise that, Jesse." - "Me neither" - You both shook your heads and you started to cut the tomatoes again. You already cleaned and cut more than one big bag of them and there was still a lot remaining. And trust me, you were a lot in the kitchen since you got back from the Baldwin place. It was occurring because of two main reasons - Maria wanted to have you under control and you still weren't sure about somehow getting through the whole patrol process.

"I would miss this... If you'd were going to Seattle." - Jesse whispered, looking into the dough in front of him. Dina flashed her eyes at you and licked her lips swiftly. Jesse had to know that you were up to something and he even had to know what was that something. - "Thank God you're not that dumb." - Jesse gave you a shining smile over the shoulder, leaning back to the dough.

"Yeah, exactly. Thank God we aren't." - You repeated and watched Dina leaving as she pointed two fingers up to signal you the time you, her, and Ellie will meet up. Neither of you planned on sleeping that night - you decided to sneak out, walk at least five miles from Jackson, find a cover and sleep there. So it was special for you when you and Joel were getting into bed. Neither of you felt like sex, so you just told each other about your days as you laid down, preparing for some sleep. Just like the first time, he'll wake up and he'll be alone. That was almost poetic.

It was a repeating cycle - but this time, Joel won't find you wandering around the city. Sure, the man got a little suspicious when you didn't want to cuddle closer and you just laid there facing each other. While the man was already drifting off, or so you suspected, you were just laying there and memorized every inch of his face. The gray, maybe-too-long but still maintained haircut and trimmed beard, a bit crooked nose with a small scar in the middle, deep wrinkles on his forehead and two leading down from his cheeks - these were visible especially when he spoke or smiled at you. Your hand was itching to feel the nicely-shaped lips, slowly caressing away down to his throat to feel the rough skin with fading suntan. But you just laid there with tears in your eyes, fighting an urge to cry.

He was beautiful. He was. And you were leaving him just to make sure he was safe. What a fucking irony.

To your surprise, you had fallen asleep. When you woke up, you've just opened up your eyes and looked around, Joel wasn't in the bed. First, you thought you're late and that he maybe knew what you were planning on doing, but you exhaled slowly when you heard the water in the bathtub moving around. He was probably taking one of his late-night baths. He had tendencies to do that when he was sleeping poorly or when he had woken up in the middle of the night. But it urged you to act quickly.

You pulled a backpack from under the bed, checking that there are your gun and the knife. Quickly, you threw some sweatshirt and a few t-shirts to change on your journey, put some warm clothes on and sneaked downstairs to put the boots on. You were moving around swiftly and quietly to make sure Joel won't be suspicious - he had to hear you walking around the place, but there wasn't a single word coming from the bathroom, so you supposed you're safe.

Slowly, you took in a long breath as you palmed the doorknob, closing your eyes. - "Lord, please grant me your mercy and take care of Joel when I'm gone. And make sure hell forgive me over the time, deal?" - You prayed. You never went to the church and you, neither Fireflies nor your parents weren't religious people. You didn't know how prayers worked, what to say, or how to concept it. But it felt good to say something to the entity up there. And if there wasn't anything, you just felt good about saying it out loud.

Shit almost hit your pants when the dining room lit up suddenly and Joel leaned his shoulder to the doorframe. He didn't even have to say a word and you already knew he's pissed. He was clothed, just after a bath and his furrow, dear Lord, that was some nightmare fuel.

"You goin' somewhere?" - The man asked quietly, crossing his forearms on his chest. Slowly, your hand let the doorknob go. A quick cuss left your lips when you smoothed your wet hands on your thighs, taking in a deep breath. Jesus, you never felt so bad. You were busted, like five-year-old stealing candy from the cookie box. - "Joel..." - You put one of your palms up, trying to calm him down before he'd let the thunder fell on you.

"I asked you 'bout lettin' the whole Baldwin thing go and you looked me in my damned eyes and said 'yea'. Did you think that you're so unobtrusive, actin' like you hadn't an idea that I know what's up? You think you're so clever, huh? Jesse told me 'bout the small date you and Dina had in the kitchen." - Joel walked to you slowly and you could tell that you're just fucked up. There was no other way to put it. Joel busted your ass and probably, he told Maria, so you weren't going anywhere.

"Don't try to stop me, Joel. If you stop me now, I'll just sneak out later. All it would do would be setting Dina and Ellie alone, and if there'd be just the two of them..." - You started to talk frantically, but Joel's palms on your shoulders made you stop. He was looking you in the face with a slight furrow. When you wanted to wiggle out, his palm caught your cheek and the man made you look up at him.

"I am not stoppin' you. I told you, baby girl, that if you'd like to go after 'em, we will go after 'em together. I am disappointed and we'll need to talk about that later, but I won't be stoppin' you, nor Dina, nor Ellie. I just don't wanna lose you, 'kay?" - The man breathed out as the oxygen in his throat hitched. You put both your palms on his chest, looking him in the face. Your tongue tried to tell all the words you wanted to tell him, all the syllables you had inside your head, but nothing came out of your mouth.

Was there any sense in trying to talk Joel down from coming with you? The man had his head and he was stubborn, so you wouldn't stop him for shit. This was dangerous for him. Joel wasn't the youngest, his reflexes weren't that good either, and... Anything could go wrong. He could die. He could die for real. Slowly, you licked your lips, hugging the man. Sure, it will weird Ellie out to have Joel coming with you on another adventure. But... More eyes see more, more brains know more and more hands could do more, right? Ellie will find her way around it, you were sure of that.

"Took my revolver and the ammo I've had hidden for it with me. You're taking your bow and quiver, right?" - He whispered to your ear. Oh. OH. The bow and arrows. You would've forgotten it at home if Joel didn't bring it up. Because of the pressure around.

With a smile, you walked to the cabinet you kept your toys in, taking them out. - "You're secretly hoarding ammo without telling Maria about it? Where are the days when your ass didn't take any ammo with it on patrols?" - A question rang throughout the silent house, having Joel chuckle in response. - "You're the most paranoid person I know, Miller. But I love for that, God knows I do." - You walked back, putting the weapon on the table as you wrapped your hands your the nape of his neck. - "I love..." - Joel answered, but he was interrupted by the noises coming from the outside.

The subtle romantic moment was ruined by something going on on the street. Quickly, you walked to the window to look out of it - and your eyes widened horrifiedly when you saw Maria stomping right to your door, leading Dina and Ellie behind her. Fuck, she must've caught them earlier. And she looked so pissed that you felt your stomach tighten.

"Did Jesse told Maria about this?" - You asked Joel, quickly hiding your and his backpack, putting the arrows and the bow down from the table. It was weird enough to find you both dressed up for a stroll at two a.m., but when Ellie and Dina were busted already, you were busted too.

"No, the boy didn't tell her. He just wanted me to know 'cause he was worried you're gonna get yourself killed, that's what he told me." - Joel shook his head, already watching his sister-in-law stomping on the porch, knocking on the door. Well... Maria didn't knock. She almost broke the door in halves.

For a moment, Joel looked at you to see if you're calm enough and then, he finally opened up, a crooked smile playing on his lips. Ellie's eyes shot wide open when she saw him all ready as well, but there wasn't space for her to speak, so she just sent you a nod. And Dina? She looked the worst, like a small kid who waited for a slap. - "Hey. Wouldn't expect you here so late, Maria, howdy," - Your man started charmingly, bit the blonde woman just pushed him out of the doorframe, walking straight to the dining table.

"What happened?" - You whispered to Ellie. Before the girl answered, she licked her lips and shook her head, giving you a clear idea. She didn't know. But before she opened up her mouth, Maria pointed her finger into the wooden desk of the table.

"Sit down, all four of you. And don't test my patience." - She ordered quietly, but her voice hinted on how infuriated she was. The situation was wickedly hilarious - Joel, a man in his early fifties, you, and two girls around their twenties were getting bitched down like a band of kindergartners. And by the looks of it, Maria wasn't slowing down.

"Maria, I've headed to Seattle, I wish I could let it all go, but I can't. I have to bring these people to justice." - She started to read from a piece of paper in her palm, looking at you and Ellie specifically. - "Ellie was right. I can't let them get away with the stuff they've done to the poor girl and with the stuff they planned on doing. I just can't. What if they'd come back, attacking at us in full force? What's holding them back?" - She read the question mockingly, but let you all know she doesn't want to get an answer on that one. She licked her lips to progress with the letter.

"I know that at least one of the three girls will come after me. Assign patrols checking on their houses in the night, make them busy, take their guns, lock the guns and horses up, maybe lock all of them up?" - Maria was getting more and more infuriated just by reading the text. So Jesse didn't tell on you. Tommy had set to Seattle on his own, holy motherfucking love of Jesus Christ. That was just a dumb idea which sure will get him killed.

"Buy me some time so I can end this on my own terms. Love you always, Tommy." - She finished and leaned her palms into the table. - "Do you realize what this letter means? Any of you? He's gonna get himself killed." - Maria bent the paper in halves, taking in a long breath.

Ellie rolled her eyes and you could see her inflating her cheeks with anger. Each of you was in a different stage of anger at that moment. And Ellie's was most probably the most hot-headed and childish, but she spoke first nonetheless. - "I told you that you can stop this, Maria. We need to finish this. He should've taken us with him. You should've given us a group to go after those fuckers right away!" - The girl whispered recklessly, looking into the desk with tongue running over her front teeth. The blonde woman sighed loudly, rolling her eyes.

At that, Maria laughed cold-heartedly, looking at the girl with anger burning inside her eyes. Whatever was going on inside Maria's head, it was a real fight. Dina turned her head at you when you breathed out, shook your head, and lowered it down. This was your fault. Your fucking fault. Tommy had the feeling that he has to do it for you. The man could barely work and his arm still wasn't good either. This mission wasn't only a suicidal one, it was pure madness. - "Wish I could." - The old woman looked Ellie in the eyes rather daringly, as if she was daring the girl to do something.

"So, now what, Maria? You wanna lock us up inside our houses? Take away our guns? Will you make us... Busy?" - Ellie opposed and finally looked at Maria. This situation was extremely uncomfortable for everyone - while Ellie had full-on one on one argument with Maria, while the three of you, you, Dina and Joel, sat there in dead silence, each of you lost in your thoughts. But you still listened to the topic of the conversation, in case of Maria would try directly verbal-assaulting anyone else. Sure, she was just mad, but if this fight would go off the rails... Some rather nasty things could've been said. Some of which couldn't be taken back.

"Well, when you're asking me so nicely, I'd prefer that you'd both stay," - Maria sighed and looked at you and Ellie sitting next to each other. You two were definitely where this suicidal idea to go to Seattle came from, she was sure of that. You most likely wanted to protect Joel, which as cavalierish as it was crazy, and Ellie wanted to revenge you. At that, Ellie spangled on her feet, having an offended expression in her face. When she pointed her finger at maria, the woman lowered her head. - "That's not gonna fucking happen," - " I'd prefer that you'd both stay, but I know you better." - With that, Ellie shut up in surprise as Maria walked to the other half of the table, now looking at Joel and Dina.

"Are you going with them?" - She rose her eyebrows. The man didn't answer, he just nodded, and Dina let out an offended 'yeah' as if it wasn't obvious.

"What did you planned on doing? Just sneaking outta here? On foot? Huh?" - Maria made herself snicker ironically after hearing another yeah, this time from Ellie. You, you were impossible. Sneaking on foot out of Jackson and traveling to Seattle? In the cold and stormy spring that was coming? Sometimes, you were dumber than Maria thought. Everyone was silent as you watched Maria looking out of the window into the night neighborhood, taking in another deep breath. When she was sure she won't kill any of you on the spot, she turned back to the table, leaning into it and staring into everyone's eyes.

"I told the stable to let you out with Sadie and Shimmer. Grab some ammo too. And some food and sleeping bags." - At that, each of you shut up. And Maria started tearing up, so she closed her eyes for a moment to calm down.

"Thank you, Maria." - Dina whispered with true respect in her voice, watching the lady calming down by walking around Joel's dining room. But then, she looked at you and Ellie with a saddened smile. - "Just, uh, do me a favor and bring my dumbass husband home in one piece, please. And... When you come back from there, we won't be ever talking about it again. No Abby, no WLFs, no golf clubs, no cottage in the mountains. We'll pretend that it never had happened." - Maria sighed. Ellie started nodding as the first one as she went to hug Maria tightly to calm the woman down. Then you went to share the hug with them, having Dina joining in as the last one. Joel sat there and watched you with a sad smile.

"All right then." - Maria stepped aside, looking at the three of you. You were always together when you did something good, something bad or something crazy. And this, to Maria's surprise, checked every box. - "Get going, you're... The way to Seattle is long, even on horseback and you need as much daylight as you can get. And to your information, Jesse didn't tell me you're planning on leaving. It was Diego who heard it." - And with that, Maria walked out of the house with the letter in her hand, shaking hands and teary eyes.

You stood there for a little longer, not knowing how to react. And as usual, Ellie was first to break the awkward silence. - "Holy motherfucking shit. I can't believe it worked out." - She sighed and sat down for a little longer as you and Joel get to preparing your gear again. Dina scoffed ironically, leaning into the back of the chair.

"Not to be the one who's breaking it to you, but everything had fucked up as much as it could and Tommy with his fucked up leg and arm is currently MIA." - Well, that was one way to look at the situation as well.

"Don't worry 'bout him for now. He's a capable guy, I saw a lot of things he has done while he was a Firefly. Trust me, if someone should be worried, it's the fuckers in Seattle." - Joel answered at that statement and zipped his jacket all the way under his chin, controlling the stuff he picked up once again. Your backpacks were full of personal stuff, but once you'd get to the horses, you'll do some space management and it'll be good. - "Since when you're going, old-timer? I don't see this happening." - Ellie licked her lips, watching Joel's face with one of her stubborn gazes.

"Then open up your eyes, kiddo. If she's comin', I'm comin'." - The man looked at you with a smile and you smiled back. Both the girls were uncomfortable for a while, watching the two of you, but after a small while, Ellie nodded and clapped. - "'kay. Fine. Alrite. Maria's right. The earlier we go, the further we get, the sooner we can catch some sleep."

[holeycrapp]

Family Dinner Night

Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader

AU: everyone is alive and you finally get to meet Ellie's dad Joel and company. (No TW, is SFW)

Psst! I take requests, shoot me an ask and comment if you want to be tagged. Also, none of my stuff is edited ×o×o

In truth, the whole thing was a long time coming. Ever since your arrival at Jackson, and your romantic tension with Ellie finally came to a head, you've known meeting her family was bound to happen. Still, the whole thing stirs butterflies in your stomach and makes you want to giggle hysterically.

Of course, you've met Tommy and Maria, you had to. And then you hung out with Dina and Jessie, which is how you got to know Ellie at all. But Joel? Joel could scare a 7ft god. That man has a reputation, one that proves his love for Ellie.

You take a deep breath, surprisingly not as nervous as you could be. It's not like Joel will order you to never see Ellie again- right? You turn towards your girlfriend, who seems in a worse state than you.

"I should just apologize right now." She looks at you, even despite the nervousness you can see on her face she stares at you adoringly. "Everyone together can be...a lot."

"Ellie, babe, I've fought clickers and bloaters." You joke, stepping in close and placing your hands on her hips. "I think I can handle meeting your dad." Before Ellie can protest calling Joel that, you lean in to gently press your lips against hers. They're chapped, which you've learned to expect. But it's worth it when her arms go around you waist, pulling you in until you're entirely to close.

You let Ellie take the lead, content to just sigh as her lips work over yours. After a moment, with the cold beginning to set in, you pull away. "I don't think Joel seeing me defiling you is a good way to meet." You whisper, pressing your forehead against hers.

"You may be right." She whispers back, smiling with her eyes shut. You pull away first, gently rubbing her hip before dropping your hands. "Let's do this." Ellie nods, shaking her arms out as you both turn towards Joel's door.

Ellie knocks first, and almost immediately the door opens to reveal Jessie and Dina. "Thought I was gonna have to pry you away with a crowbar." Jessie grins, leaning against the doorway until Dina pushes him.

"Leave them alone, I think they're cute!" Dina replies, reaching out of the house to yank Ellie inside who in turn grabs you. "Hope you're hungry, Tommy and Joel sure can cook!" Dina calls as you let out a small laugh. Ellie practically radiates nerves, so you gently take her hand in yours.

"They're here!" Jessie screams, both leading us out of the foyer and into what can only be a dining room. Inside, Maria leans against the table with her arms crossed.

"Look what the cat dragged in!" She calls, looking at both of you. She steps foreward, arms open and you release Ellie's hand to let Maria drag her into a hug. You smile, wrapping your arms around yourself. "And Y/N, i'm so glad you could make it." Maria then grins at you as Ellie pulls away.

"Alright people, soups on!" Tommy enters the dining room, carrying three plates in his arms that he swiftly sets down with a small chant of 'hot hot hot'. Ellie returns to your side, leading you towards a pair of seats beside the head of the table. She pulls your chair out for you, and you blush.

"Why thank you, m'lady." You say in a british accent before taking a seat and letting your girlfriend push you in. Ellie then takes the seat on your left, beside the head of the table. Jessie hurries to site on your other side, with Dina sitting across from him. Tommy takes the seat in front of Ellie, with Maria in front of you.

"Damn this smells good." You grin, eyeing the food hungrily as Tommy laughs. "Ellie has definitely been hiding this delicious food from me." You knock into her shoulder.

"Well now we can rememdy that since she's finally brought you around." Maria grins, winking at me. I look over at Ellie, who has a dark blush across her cheeks.

"Alright, the over was testing my patience but it's edible." Joel enters the dining room, and your stomach flips. You have to make a good impression, Ellie needs you too.

"Smells delicious." Dina and Ellie say at the same time as Joel sets down a ham in the center of the table. You van feel your stomach start to twist with hunger as Joel takes the seat at the head of the table.

"Alright I'm definitely coming around more." You joke, hoping not to overstep your bounds as you glance at Joel. The gruff man suddenly grins, teeth bright, as he looks over at his daughter Ellie.

"Kid, as far as I'm concerned," He looks at you, and your stomach flips. "You're apart of the family." Everyone around the table lets out hoots and hollers before you all dig in. You share a look with Ellie, grinning.

See? It all worked out.

[strategemme]

I THINK WITH MY HEART AND I MOVE WITH MY HEAD

EMMELINE VANCE: Character Task No. 1

𝖖 𝖚 𝖔 𝖙 𝖊 𝖘

The lion cannot protect himself from traps, and the fox cannot defend himself from wolves. One must therefore be a fox to recognize traps, and a lion to frighten wolves. I don't trust society to protect us, I have no intention of placing my fate in the hands of men whose only qualification is that they managed to con a block of people to vote for them. They used to say that if Man was meant to fly, he’d have wings. But he did fly. He discovered he had to. There are things that have to be done and you do them and you never talk about them. You don't try to justify them. They can't be justified. You just do them. Then you forget it. Due to personal reasons, I will be performing vigilante justice. 

𝖇 𝖆 𝖘 𝖎 𝖈

NAME: Emmeline L. Vance; there isn’t a soul (presently) alive that knows what the “L” stands for. NICKNAMES: Em; other abbreviations of her name are generally acceptable as long as you don’t try to call her Emmie.  AGE: 22 BIRTHDAY: August 27, 1957 GENDER: Female PRONOUNS: She/Her

𝖋 𝖆 𝖒 𝖎 𝖑 𝖞

MOTHER: Florence Vance neé Chevalier ( 50 ) { born in France, moved to England after marrying Devon } // muggle  FATHER: Col. Devon Vance ( 57 ) { recently retired from the British Army } // muggle  SIBLINGS: Anthony Vance ( 28 ) { named after a dear friend of Devon’s that was killed during the Second World War } // muggle 

𝖕 𝖍 𝖞 𝖘 𝖎 𝖈 𝖆 𝖑 𝖆𝖙𝖙𝖗𝖎𝖇𝖚𝖙𝖊𝖘

FACE CLAIM: Demet Özdemir BUILD: Average height, athletic HAIR: Long, worn in waves on nights requiring effort and otherwise tossed into a bun   HAIR COLOR: Brunette EYE COLOR: Brown SKIN COLOR: Tan DOMINANT HAND: Right { she’s pitiful when it comes to her left hand }  ANOMALIES: (1) Scar across her left palm from making a blood-pact as a ten year old; it’s so faded now that you can only catch a gleam of silver in the bright sun. (2) Various small burns across her hands and forearms from healing poultices gone askew. SCENT: Vanilla and cedar wood; she’s worn the same perfume since her Hogwarts  ACCENT: Standard English  ALLERGIES: Cats  DISORDERS: Insomnia; she’s always attributed it to a general pace of “too much to do and too little time,” but there are nights when all she wants to do is collapse into her bed yet finds herself condemned to staring at the ceiling; many people make the mistake of believing that she doesn’t need sleep to operate, but her history of errors speaks otherwise.  FASHION: She spends far more time in lime green robes than she cares for, and thus compensates with a wardrobe full of neutral colors. She still feels more comfortable in muggle attire than wizarding robes, and thus is seen frequently in various combinations of jeans, blouses, and boots.  NERVOUS TICS: After years of having her tics evaluated and erased, Emmeline has largely eradicated any tells of nervousness. Old habits die hard, however, and with the stress of the war mounting, she’s falling back into drumming her index and middle finger on any solid surface capable of absorbing her anxiety. As she’s assumed a leadership position, she’s also taken up the habit of pacing while waiting for her teams of tier three operatives to return.  QUIRKS: (1) With the current travel restrictions, Emmeline has fallen back into driving. She learned during one of her summers away from Hogwarts, and her trusty Vauxhall Viva has carried her across Britain and back several times over. (2) When approach Diagon Alley for pleasure, Emmeline prefers to enter through the Leaky Cauldron. There’s something symbolic about crossing from Muggle to Wizarding London. (3) If Emmeline starts something, she has to finish. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, she cannot abandon a task already underway. It is one of the reasons she spends so long planning: planning necessitates time and distance while action must be immediate. 

𝖑 𝖎 𝖋 𝖊 𝖘 𝖙 𝖞 𝖑 𝖊

RESIDES: Puddlemere, England { London has always been home, and her work at St. Mungo’s frequently brings her into the city. But as war rears its head, Emmeline has opted for more strategic ground. The community of Puddlemere is welcoming to muggleborns, and her proximity to other Order members offers safety that could never be found in city streets. } BORN: London, England  RAISED: Too many places to count, though Emmeline isn’t partial to declaring military barracks as her hometown. Jokingly, she’ll say that Hogwarts was the most permanent home she had while growing up. More seriously, she’ll consider herself a Londoner.  PETS: A tawny owl named Machiavelli, though she considers him more of a useful friend than a pet.  CAREER: Healer { additionally, a vigilante; she offers free... how shall we say.. r e t r i b u t i o n to muggleborn and half-blood families that need a little extra muscle, be it of the offensive or defensive sort. } EXPERIENCE: In the medical field, Emmeline has specialized in accident and emergency, though it seems every Witch or Wizard only deems medical care necessary in such cases. Outside St. Mungo’s, she has frequented several underground dueling clubs to keep her skills sharp.  EMPLOYER: St. Mungo’s POLITICAL AFFILIATION: The Order of the Phoenix  BELIEFS: The the Wizarding community is in desperate need of some muggle influence (preventative medicine, to start, but automobiles, microwaves, and telephones would be a wonderful addition). The motivation of purebloods to eradicate such influence only keeps the community from advancing and reaching full potential, and the mounting war is representative of the collision between the old world and the new. (That said, she’s strongly of the belief that no one should have to die while seeking out inclusivity.)  MISDEMEANORS: Nothing that has found its way onto her record.  FELONIES: Being a muggleborn is starting to damn well feel like one.  DRUGS: Never. As much as Emmeline has a tendency to lock herself within her mind, she has yet to seek out drugs as a key.  SMOKES: Unfortunately. She knows she shouldn’t, but nicotine is often the only thing capable of taking the edge off and stimulating her focus at the same time. It’s a necessary evil, and her pocket is rarely without a pack  ALCOHOL: A taste for scotch runs in the family, and it’s often one of the most expensive items on her list of expenses for the month. She refuses to touch it while in the process of acting, but it plays a large role in her planning stages.  DIET: Emmeline never managed to find the time to take up cooking, and as such, she depends on local takeout.  LANGUAGES: English, French  PHOBIAS: Deep water { she adores swimming, but will never go so deep that her toes can’t graze the bottom } ; failure { a common fear, but many years passed where she refused to speak up in class because her fear of being wrong was greater than her confidence in being right; now those days have passed and she’s perhaps too passionately outspoken, but if she isn’t complete convinced of something, the words will never pass her lips } ; death { she’s grazed the reaper more times than she can count, either in her own life or accompanying the paths of others. still, she can’t imagine what it would be like to see her own funeral. she acts with certainty and confidence, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t fear what is on the other side of that bright green flash. } HOBBIES: Reading, board games or cards, camping, pick-up games of very, very, very amateur Quidditch  TRAITS: I never dreamed about success; I worked for it.  { + }: Hardworking, clever, frequently compassionate (but...) { - }: Occasionally apathetic, subconsciously manipulative, righteous 

𝖋 𝖆 𝖛 𝖔 𝖗 𝖎 𝖙 𝖊 𝖘

LOCATION: Diagon Alley; it is the place where she first felt that her magic was a blessing rather than a curse, and it continues to instill that childlike hope in her whenever she visits. It’s one of the few bright places remaining.  SPORTS TEAM: Puddlemere United, naturally. She’s only recently moved to Puddlemere, but she has a long history of training Mediwitches and Mediwizards during Puddlemere’s practices and matches, and as such has brushed shoulders with the team just enough to be emotionally invested in their success.  GAME: Chess (of either the muggle or wizarding variety)  MUSIC: She knows the correct answer to this is anything orchestral, yet Goodbye Yellowbrick Road is the most frequently-played record in her flat.  MOVIES: The Godfather, Patton, Saturday Night Fever FOOD: Her mother’s Beef Wellington. She’s yet to find its rival.  BEVERAGE: Scotch, Earl Grey COLOR: Light green (but certainly not lime, damn those robes) 

𝖒 𝖆 𝖌 𝖎 𝖈

ALUMNI HOUSE: Ravenclaw  WAND (length, flexibility, wood, & core): 11.25in, sturdy, redwood, dragon heartstring AMORTENTIA: Leather, incense, cotton  PATRONUS: Hawk  BOGGART: The visage of the first patient that died due to her negligence. It isn’t an exact replica from her memories, but one that is in the process of decomposing. It’s propped up in a bed like the ones populating St. Mungo’s. 

𝖈 𝖍 𝖆 𝖗 𝖆 𝖈 𝖙 𝖊 𝖗

MORAL ALIGNMENT: Neutral good  MBTI: ENTJ MBTI ROLE: Analyst ENNEAGRAM: Type 8  ENNEAGRAM ROLE: The Achiever  TEMPERAMENT: Choleric WESTERN ZODIAC: Virgo  CHINESE ZODIAC: Rooster PRIMAL SIGN: Corgi TAROT CARD: The Chariot TV TROPES: Lady of War, Female Empowerment Song, Historical In-Joke, Showing Up Chauvinists  SONGS: Tongues -- Joywave // History Has Its Eyes on You -- Christopher Jackson // Come With Me Now -- KONGOS // Vindicated -- Dashboard Confessional // Baba O’Riley -- The Who // Vienna -- Billy Joel // Machine -- MisterWives // Kill Your Heroes -- AWOLNATION // Sabotage -- Beastie Boys 

𝖎 𝖉 𝖊 𝖔 𝖑 𝖔 𝖌 𝖎 𝖊 𝖘

Muggle influence will do more good for the wizarding world than it ever will harm

Encourages second chances but condemns those that require a third 

People should expect to get out of the world what they put in (no more, no less) 

Violence should be a last resort, but damn if it isn’t a definitive one

Those that are neutral in a time of oppression have chosen the side of the oppressor 

Sugar has no right to be in coffee or tea 

History repeats itself; if you can’t find a parallel within the pages of history books, the situation simply hasn’t developed thoroughly enough yet 

Cheap scotch is worse than sewer water