#sheetar

[adamwatchesmovies]

Blood Diner (1987)

Though Blood Diner is called a horror comedy, it’s never scary. It is plenty bloody, however. With abundant dark laughs and a self-aware sleaziness that gives the film a lot of personality, this is one I could see the right audiences calling a new favorite.   Brothers Michael and George Tutman (Rick Burks and Carl Crew) are the owners of a wildly popular vegetarian restaurant. The restaurant’s secret? The special ingredient is meat. What kind of meat? Human. See, as children, they witnessed their beloved uncle Anwar Namtut (Drew Godderis) die in a police shootout following a ritualistic massacre. They've resurrected him as a brain in a jar and seek to fulfill his mission: resurrecting the ancient Lumerian goddess Sheetar. To bring her back to life, they need to collect body parts from a variety of immoral women, put together a “blood buffet” made from organ meats from other immoral women, and then have Sheetar devour a virgin. As the bodies pile up, detectives Sheba Jackson (LaNette LaFrance) and Mark Shepard (Roger Dauer) investigate.

Based on that synopsis, would it surprise you to learn this movie has more topless women than an hour of Naked News? Sheetar’s new body must be pieced together from sleazy women, the kind that would participate in a naked cheerleading competition, or go back to someone’s place after speaking with them for less than 5 minutes at a bar. It isn’t enough that they chop up a whole group of women and stitch them together in a new beautiful body; they need more ladies of ill repute to fillet and feed to the unsuspecting guests who will attend the resurrection ritual. The buffet recipes only calls for a few choice bits so the rest of the evidence must be disposed of by sneaking it into the regular menu items at the Tutman restaurant. Good thing the customers are so busy stuffing their faces they don’t notice the disappearing patrons or the multiple instances of the boys walking into the dining area covered in blood, hands full of dripping intestines!

You can tell everyone involved in Blood Diner was having a good time. The actors are having conversations with a brain in a jar, wounds that would be fatal and horrific are made ridiculous and laugh-out-loud funny. The special effects and gore are pretty good, but not so good that you’re disturbed by any of them and once in a while, the visuals are as cheesy as the rest of the plot - giving you another reason to laugh. There’s something delightful about the fact that these two numbskulls are picking up all of these hussies but also have to befriend a gentle virgin (Lisa Elaina) and get her to go on a “romantic date” that involves wrestling and culminates in this awesome ancient Lumerian dinner that she’ll "definitely love"!

As much fun as Blood Diner is, there are a few parts here and there that could’ve been ironed out. There are one too many references to Nazis, there's a death in Bronson Cave that feels a little too random and the ending - while delightfully weird - can’t make up its mind about what it wants to do with the music. There’s a band playing, but they keep getting interrupted by the movie’s soundtrack. Otherwise, Blood Diner is pretty great. There are many memorable scenes, gags, and characters. The one I’ll remember best has nudity in it (not for the reasons you think) but a runner-up has to do with a rival vegetarian restaurant owner who has an unfortunate encounter with the brothers - it doesn't go the way you think it will.

Blood Diner is the kind of movie I can’t give more than a 3.5/5 rating to, but could see myself re-watching again before some 5-star movies. It’s weird and quirky, distinct, unapologetic and consistently gruesome - in a funny way. (January 2, 2023)

[soimarriedahorrorfan]

It's a brand new month here on So I Married A Horror Fan! We are kicking off March in the wildest way possible by looking at Blood Diner from 1987!

How the hell did Leigh end up becoming obsessed with this film without having ever seen it?

What in the hell is this movie? Like, seriously where do we even begin with it?

We get into how this is very much a product of the 80s and how making a movie this off the wall would be a challenge now.

We try to break the 7000 different things going on in this movie, and if any of it works at all

We talk about the characters and whether or not there is anyone at all you are meant to root for in this film.

We each give our own personal thoughts on cannibalism and the use of it in films and how it's depicted here.

All of this and lots more in this fun, wild episode. Press that play button now and Hail Sheetar!

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[onlyhurtforaminute]

REVOLTING-SHEETAR THE BLOOD QUEEN

[monstermaster13]

TftW: Awakening of Sheetar.

Sheetar (Blood Diner) TG.

Trolse and his fiance Natalia were monsterologists and demon hunters who worked together one afternoon while the couple were looking online for demon related media to binge-watch on Shudder, Trolse found a movie called ‘Blood Diner’ which was about a goddess called Sheetar.

He thought at first that it was one of those Full Moon Features type movies but to him anything was better than having to put up with whiny protagonists who are supposedly likable but turn genocidal towards the end, so he picked that movie and found himself getting hooked into it.

Natalia normally didn’t watch monster movies, but she found herself liking this movie as well and liking the goddess. Which led them into a rabbit hole of summoning spells and rituals, one of which was a Sheetar summoning spell. ‘Do summoning spells really work?’ ‘Well Trolse, you’re in a tf story, you know how this goes.’ ‘Oh yeah, normally when I look for these I just find links to websites that require you to pay in order to use what they deem as actual magic.’

Which was true, most of the time when it comes to websites about magic that claim to teach you how to use ‘real magic’ are scams made to try and get a quick buck out of you, but there are some that do in fact work and can be useful, it’s just there is a lot of garbage to dig through and ads. He clicked on the summoning spell and read it aloud, which normally would be a bad thing but not in this case.

The screen flickered and blacked out, but before Sheetar’s spirit emerged from the screen, Sheetar gestured to him and he found himself being drawn to her, and it was then that she decided to make him hers…pulling him towards her. As horrifying as she was with her mouth full of sharp teeth, the venus flytrap-like mouth on her belly and her imposing posture and stature, he couldn't help but be drawn by her.

He couldn’t believe this was happening, he was horrified yet impressed by this rather gruesome goddess. That’s when Sheetar kissed him and her spirit dived into his mouth and down his throat, he coughed a little bit.

Natalia watched as she saw her fiance’s hands shrink and his fingernails lengthen, taking on the appearance of looking like claws but also being feminine. His chest and torso slimmed as his stomach followed suit, but something else was developing on his stomach as what appeared to be a Venus fly trap-like mouth that went down from his chest which was developing breasts, down to where his belly button was.

His jeans transformed into a golden skirt while his hips flared out and his legs contorted, his feet shrank down in size while his privates retracted, his shoulders shrank inward as his neckline altered, his back arched while what appeared to be an ornate headress materialized on his head. His hair lengthened, turning a darker shade as ornate beads and braids were styled into it.

Examining himself, he saw his eyebrows thinning while his nose shrank, red eye makeup was applied around his eyes as eyelashes blossomed around them. His lips plumped up and his cheekbones sharpened, while his teeth sharpened, looking like those of a ravenous monster.

His voice also deepend, becoming raspier and demonic sounding but his transformation came to an end after that and he was still himself, just now he looked and sounded like ‘Sheetar’ the villainess and demonic goddess from the movie he had watched earlier. ‘Are you still in there?’ ‘Yesssss..I am, and I must say I really like this form.’ ‘Oh Trolse, you had me worried for a second, I thought Sheetar took control of you.’

"Don't worry, she'll never do that. I may be her, but I am not her completely."

"That's good. I am glad you like this new form."

[johnbranhamart]

I’m running low on dog dicks and rats. #blooddiner #sheetar #rats #dogdicks #vegetarian #vegan #eatfresh #jackiekong #healthfood https://www.instagram.com/p/CEDuPP0h29k/?igshid=5bcuzvwhgoob

[anniec1369]

Warning! The truly unusual motion picture you are about to see contains many scenes of graphic violence. It is not intended for the faint of heart nor the young and impressionable. While it is a sad fact that mass homicide and practitioners of blood cults infest our society, the producers of this film wish to express that they do not condone, nor do they want to inspire, any of the human butchery or violence portrayed in this film. If you feel you will be offended by such material, please leave the theatre at once. Note: All of the mutilations, bodily dismemberments and cannibal rituals were performed by seasoned professionals. Please do not attempt any of these stunts at home. Thank you Horror movie #177-Blood Diner #horrormoviesof2020 #365daysofhorror #blooddiner #vestron #littlejimmyhitler #vegitarianfood #buffet #sheetar #evil #namtut #bloodbuffet #bluraycollection #gore #horror #horrorchick #horrornerd #snarkmastergeneral #nerd #shenerd #fairygoremother #shenerdroom https://www.instagram.com/p/CA1GN8qFfdE/?igshid=n40yhlm6169q

[secondtermsurprises]

Seramila Aquino

A Fallen Angel, who can pass as a blue demon if she wants, but, prefers not to, 'Angel Mom' Seramila doesn't act so angelic. Now, of course, she does have that cool angel mind, that can process knowledge with ease, as well as a cool angel attitude that's normally reserved for the most self-righteous(Or higher up) of angels, but, she also has a bit of a temper. If you piss her of enough, she- Well...She's likely to do something horrible to you, to say the least, with a cold as ice expression. And, as a fallen being whose been in Hell for who knows how long, she has discovered more than a few methods for pain making and torture, to say the least...

Normally, Seramila can be found in the Aquinos mansion, sipping a chilled latte of dread, usually while managing the Aquinos family interest, or, just searching the web for stuff for their kids. She often teaches Dahlia things like strategy, battle tactics, and how to intimidate and terrorize her enemies, but...The last bit often comes off as Dahlia talking more like a well spoken villain from fiction. Honestly, she blames her wife, Delilah, for letting their kids watch so many cartoons when they were younger.

...To be honest, there's a bit of mystery surrounding the Aquino family. For about twelve years, no one outside of their minions and employees really heard from the two heads of the Aquino family in the eighth circle, only that they expanded their territory to include an orphanage. But, when they finally came out, they had a ten year old blue demon daughter, and a...Five year old son of questionable heritage.

Add to the fact that few older inhabitants have ever heard of 'Seramila Aquino' before this period- ...Although, there is the one lackey who one time accidentally referred to her as 'Lord Seramel', right before she disposed of him in a violent, torturous fashion. Plus, their blue son seems to have a few obvious physical angel traits...

Of course, Sera does seem to have a very pragmatic, cool nature, but, needless to say, it seems to be a bad idea for one to ever try to deadname her...Who she was in the past isn’t who she is in the present.

Dahlia often seems to try and impress her the most, most of her life having done things like wrestling demonic Cyclopses, to breaking the concept of Gleeman Sheetar, whoever or whatever the hell that is. I mean, if it's a concept, and its broken, how would you even know what it ever originally was...? But, Sera's not easily impressed, and, she typically talks with her daughter in a cool, calm fashion, not often showing emotion or affection to her...But, she does worry about her, whenever she's sure no one's looking.

Appearance wise, she looks like a fairly, pale humanoid woman, with slightly blue tinted skin, glowing light blue eyes, long black and white hair, and what seem to be feathered bat wings, with evidence of hell-type surgery being present. She often wears business type glasses, and, formal business-type attire, with a formal skirt.

[neon-green-reagent]

From @aloy-of-the-nora: Top five underrated horror movies

More underrated horror films! I can do this all day. Seriously. The theme for this one... It’s dumb but I love it. 

-Hack-O-Lantern. This one hits that sweet spot where it’s so overacted and weird, but I got really invested. Basically a 40yo teenage boy is the chosen one to lead Satan’s army, actually it’s never explained that explicitly, but I’m trying to be concise here. His grandfather who is also his father due to incest is leading him down this path. Everyone knows it. Yet no one stops it. And two people have sex on a fresh grave. 

-Mausoleum. Like the above, dumb but I got so wrapped up in it. A woman’s family has a curse where if she goes into the mausoleum a demon will possess her. This happens. And she has sex with men and kills them like a total badass. I honestly didn’t see a problem with her being evil. I thought it was great. And her breasts have teeth. 

-Frightmare. An old horror actor is a shithead his whole life and then dies. And these film students obsessed with him bring his body home, which reanimates. He kills them all, and the kills are mostly lame, but Jeffrey Combs is in it. 

-Blood Diner. Two brothers dig up their uncle who instructs them on how to complete a ritual to awaken a goddess named Sheetar. It involves murder and cannibalism and assembling a body from spare parts. Oh, and their uncle is just a brain and eyes in a jar. And Sheetar has a stomach mouth. 

-Slaughter High. A group of kids played by adults harass and bully this kid until he gets in a horrible accident. Years later, they’re invited to a school reunion, and none of them seem to notice how hinky the whole thing is until they start dying in hilarious and over-the-top ways. Best death by far goes to the couple having sex on an electrified bed. Must be seen to be believed. 

[sc4bpuppy]

Sheetar fanboys be like

[luxuryegyptianlinens1]

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[cinemamablog]

A Bloody Feast

About three years ago, Vestron Video launched their collectors’ collection of Blu-rays, re-introducing straight-to-video horror titles from the 80s and 90s to schlock-loving audiences. The day Vestron’s first offerings appeared in stores, two local horror shops hosted signings for the films, with members of the crew (including the directors) present to sign copies of their respective cult classics, Chopping Mall and Blood Diner. I had never seen either of the films but was very excited to meet Jackie Kong, director of B movies like The Being and Blood Diner, because I can’t think of many women working in horror in the 80s, besides Amy Holden-Jones and Kathryn Bigelow.

Kong gave me and my fellow autograph seekers her full attention, after showing up for the signing tardy. She learned that I’m from Iowa and invited me to attend her Alamo Drafthouse Q & A in Denver when I visited the Midwest later in the month. I didn’t make it to the Denver screening, but Kong’s enthusiasm in Burbank that day made up for the time we spent waiting for her arrival. While my Blu-ray got passed  along the table to collect the Blood Diner crew’s signatures, the director of photography warned me in a thick German (that’s just a guess on my part) accent to watch Blood Diner on an empty stomach, chuckling at the thought of a new generation watching his gruesome little picture from 1987.

Based on the hype online surrounding the Vestron releases, I assumed Blood Diner was an overlooked treasure, a golden nugget of horror history long hidden from the eyes of casual fans of the genre. Imagine my surprise when I played my new Vestron Blu-ray and instead witnessed a hot mess. A delightful hot mess? Oh yes. I’d watch a mess directed by Kong over a high-budget effort by another director in a heartbeat. Listen, if you want to make a career of repping the low-budget movies you directed thirty years ago, I salute you. Guys do it all the time, acting like their poop doesn’t stink when their art certainly does, so I can’t help but admire a woman who created hilarious B movies and owns it like she painted the Last Supper.

In contrast to Blood Diner, which I had never even heard of until Vestron re-released it, I had read about Blood Feast for years. The film’s director, Herschell Gordon Lewis, receives credit as the Godfather of Gore due to his prolific output of, you guessed it, gory B features. Trash maestro John Waters worships at the altar of HGL and most millennials can probably recognize his work after Diablo Cody wrote in a ‘cameo’ of sorts for Wizard Gore in her Oscar-winning script for Juno. This autumn, the Criterion Channel streaming service added an assortment of Lewis’ video nasties to their library. Last weekend, I finally sat down one lazy morning and watched the movie considered by many to be the first gore movie, Blood Feast.

Similar to Blood Diner in cheap aesthetic and bright red gore effects, but literally decades ahead of it with a production year of 1963, Blood Feast follows a series of murders committed by a small town caterer, Fuad Ramses, in tribute to the Egyptian goddess Ishtar. Upon viewing Blood Feast, the pieces of the puzzle clicked together in my brain: Blood Diner pays homage to HGL’s original story of ancient ritualistic bloodshed! Kong’s directorial effort follows two restaurateurs who serve up their customers, literally, as a sacrificial feast to the goddess Sheetar. Sound familiar?

A Blood Feast for the 80s, Kong’s low-budget aesthetic in Blood Diner doesn’t fit in with the impressive practical effects and tight filmmaking of the time, from horror auteurs like John Carpenter, but rather finds its rightful home in a double feature with Lewis’ tale of a meal fit for a god(dess). Watch them both on an empty stomach. Or if you’d prefer, and you’re not squeamish, order a pizza and dig in, with a bloody concoction of trash cinema for dessert.

[snackaddict]

ZZAPP! The King of White Trash meets the wrath of Sheetar in my day 25 pick for #31daysofhorror & #inktober2017, Jackie Kong's trashterpiece BLOOD DINER. #inktober #spookyshow2017

[rvxen]

Shane’s 6th Annual October Horror MovieFest Spooktacular! Part One

(I’ve been posting this on fb, but felt i should bring it to the tumblrworld... basically, my wife and i save all our horror movie watching until October and then binge like crazy. Then I write silly synopsis about each! So, I’ll catch you all up and keep going from here.)

Triple Feature last night!

First, some story: when I was about 7 or 8, i was over at my friend Zach's place and his mom was watching this insane movie about a diner butchering people, a naked lady getting chased by an axe, some dude driving without hands and blood spurting, and a rock'n'roll scene where a guy's ears explode. I was a bit of an 'innocent' child and these scenes dug into my brain and latched on as some truly horrific memories. Last night, I was able to dig up the actual movie to prove that it was real and to finally get some context for these memories.

That movie is called Blood Diner (1987) and it is insane. Two brothers are indoctrinated into the Cult of Sheetar by their crazy uncle who is gunned down in the first scene to have his brain dug up twenty years later by the brothers and spends the rest of the movie as a trash-talking brain-and-eyes-in-a-jar dictator of the brother's gruesome activities... which include using their "vegetarian" restaurant to serve human parts of their victims to idiot vegetarians in order to bring back Sheetar, a Lumarian demon-goddess from "Five Million, BC". Plus there's a rival veggie-chef who's a ventriloquist(???), lots of trashy nudity, and a scene where a woman gets her head turned into a donuthole. I feel a few of my particularly gruesome nightmares growing up can be traced to this film.

To cool down after that, we headed straight into Shivers (1975)! Oh boy, even more Cronenberg! This felt very similar to Rabid which he did a couple years later (disaster happens at a remote location which then spreads to Montreal) but instead of Super-Rabies, this time there's a Cronenberg-slug that is transmitted thru kissing (or gut bursting) and causes people to become sex maniacs at a resort-like apartment complex. So basically, Zombie Swingers! It's fun but I'm starting to think David really doesn't know what sex is. Pretty sure it doesn't involve bloody slugs or rabies, at least not all the time.

Finally, bringing it back out of the sludge, DR. TERROR'S HOUSE OF HORRORS (1965): Yet another Cushing/Lee flick but this time with a super young Donald Sutherland! As noted elsewhere, the title is a misnomer as it takes place on a train (not a house, least of all one of horrors) and Cushing plays a man dubbed "Mr. Shreck" not DR. TERROR... but it's about five dudes in a rail car who each have their fortunes read by Cushing and an anthology-style movie ensues. Lee with a creeping hand haunting him is probably the best of these stories, tho the werewolf one was groovy. If you want similar flavor but a better film, also starring Cushing, check out 1972's Tales from the Crypt.

(end note: this came after a day of training where we had to watch 'educational' films about bloodborn pathogens, seizures, back pain, and handwashing for 6 hours. we were both simultaneously bored and grossed out. these films help us process all of that.)