#shhdjsjsjs

[evansbby]

what if one day, while omega’s out doing a grocery run with rosie (despite steve insisting endlessly that they have people to do errands for them, but ever since that one day he got peggy to drop off the groceries, omega’s taking charge and doing her own groceries maybe as a distraction from her husband and his assistant), she’s pulled out of her thoughts when she overhears a rap that quickly becomes catchy to her

she thinks she’ll never hear it again, but when she starts to notice that same rap just about every week doing the groceries, curiosity overcomes her, and she just has to find out who this man is! and hearing that it’s close enough that the source of the rap is in the next isle over, omega grabs the jar of baby food to put in the cart before pushing it to the next isle

the guy who’s rapping looks similar to steve, but knows it couldn’t possibly be him he can’t rap to save his life, she thinks

“let me guess, you’re brenner?” she asks, recalling from his rap. shy as she was, omega’s proud of herself for opening up—given that she’s usually shy

pete finds omega adorable as she tries to not fumble over her words while complimenting his rapping skills—it’s endearing to him, really

since they usually are at the grocery store around the same time every week, they soon become friends, and before you know it—pete offers to deliver omega’s groceries instead, because he “doesn’t want her to tire those pretty legs of hers” besides, an omega should just worry about looking after her kids, right?

so, omega tells steve that she stops going out to shop for groceries, and she stops asking him to send groceries to the house (when it’s really peggy that does the deliveries anyways) however, omega doesn’t specify who exactly is making these deliveries, just that she has the people steve’s already employed to send groceries to her (not that his employees can be bothered enough to care anyways, it’s less work for them)

but when peggy pulls up to the house (steve sent her out to send a bouquet to omega as a spontaneous romantic gesture, though she’s likely planning to manipulate the context to omega and make her even more insecure), without warning to omega, what does peggy do when she sees omega talking to someone in a car that clearly doesn’t belong to steve?

would peggy take photographic evidence to show to steve? though is might backfire on her, since steve will just get pete killed and shower omega with even more attention than before

OR

does peggy wait to see how long this plays out in hopes that omega will choose to leave steve for pete on her own? i mean, all peggy really has to do is feed insecurities to omega’s baby brain while being sent to pete’s arms for comfort

forgive me bestie i just miss jealous poyt!steve

Bestie I love you but THIS WOULD NOT HAPPEN BC PETE IS NOT EVEN IN THE SAME LEAGUE AS STEVE LIKE NOT EVEN CLOSE AND OMEGA IS SO NICE BUT EVEN SHE REALISES THAT HER HUSBAND IS THE HOTTEST GUY ON EARTH AND PETE DOES NOT COMPARE 😭

Like I cannot imagine omega going up to Pete and talking to him. She’s too focused on trying to do her groceries properly and also focused on a Rosie who is sitting in the shopping cart 😭 If anything, Pete would come over to omega but she’d be too shy to respond to his flirtations but he would be relentless.

I can imagine Peggy seeing them and taking a pic to show Steve. A few shenanigans and misunderstandings later, Steve is absolutely livid and heartbroken at the thought of his wife cheating on him 😭😭😭 I can imagine him getting super drunk at work, alone in his office and then Peggy gets the chauffeur to drive them home and she helps him into the house bc he’s so drunk and omega sees Peggy all over him… I mean Steve’s so drunk he doesn’t even know where he is but Peggy looks all smug until omega takes over and asks her to please leave.

More shenanigans. More misunderstandings.

I think Steve and omega would clear it up though. But I think before Steve expresses anger over Pete, he’d express insecurity. He is drunk after all, and he’d tell her that he still loves her even if she cheats on him, and he’ll always love her and that he’d forgive her if she cheated on him because he doesn’t want to live a life without her 🥺🥺 (he’s saying all this while drunk) and omega is like !!!! “I didn’t cheat on you !!! That was just some guy at the supermarket who kept talking to me!”

And Steve is like all relieved like “really?🥺” before his usual douchiness kicks in “pffft I knew that” and then he orders to have Pete killed the end.

[socalledfreethinker]

i don’t miss being a teenager or the nigh cataclysmic events that were ultimately unimportant or the agony of untreated mental illness or the misery of being physically abused, but i do miss the ability to scream and cry and kick and fight and just generally lose my fucking mind over things that came with my childhood and everyone kinda just shrugging it off because don’t you secretly want to do it too? when you’re an adult and you see teenagers throwing apoplectic fits over not getting what they want or being mistreated, don’t you wish you could once more scream and shout and tear down everything in the nearest vicinity with little lasting consequences?

[awesam-sauce]

every time i talk to my older mutuals i feel like i’m being held up by the scruff like a cat and examined. this is a good thing btw i just thought of it in the car and thought it was funny :3

(this may or may not be aimed towards @desire-mona …….. i feel like a creature in the silliest way possible If That Makes Sense /pos)

edit: how. how did my dumb sleepy ass forget to tag the othet tqo. @todds-diary and @perksofbeingpoet see i put yalls names in the tags but blanked out?? listen i was very sleepy eepy it was one am 😞😞 i hope yall dont mind being tagged SHHDJSJSJ)

[scrybe-of-death]

i actually pay more attention to my french duolingo course than this fucking class

mostly because one of the characters i have are french

SHHDJSJSJ same

couldnt care less abt spanish its an easy A but im over here sweating over 100%ing a duolingo lesson

[shiba-boyfriend]

Hey, sorry to bother you if this was intentional but in case it wasn’t, I think tumblr May have glitched when you reblogged the “gay vampire call that a fruit bat” post

no glitch baby, i reblogged that six whole times because i am sexy

[twsted-seas]

Another final down, 1 more to go. I should’ve been done these Monday, but then life happened so here we are.

I’ll start working on the responses from the 100 followers celebration this weekend. Y’all can still send in requests, there is just no guaranteeing when/if I’ll do them. (Though you can always commission me. ;) )

[rei-does-stuff]

@rigatoniiiiiiii

everyone shut up and look at this

[lesbiean-main]

Haha I heard your in the ogrelords now. I applied but I'm so glad I didn't get in! Ya'll are so lame. [insert crying-laughing emoji] Have fun! (NOT)

u heard it here now folks. there is some DRAMA in the ogrelords bc some SALTY ASS anon h8s us 😩😩 catch me cryin in a dennys parking lot

[evansbby]

im scared to read wicked games rn…

BESTIE I AM SCARED TOO

[lokilesbian]

🍉:p

I follow you because u seem super nice and have hilarious posts! 😄😄

mutuals send me a 🍉 for the reasons I follow u!

[lilnasxvevo]

People in the notes are reminding me that Shang Qinghua is also “a sleazy bastard responsible for the deaths of hundreds of children,” which should be taken into account as well, I suppose.

I saw a post a couple weeks ago that listed moshang as an example of a “the grumpy one falls in love with the sunshine one” pairing and at the time I just ignored it but I gotta get this off my chest.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Shang Qinghua is at all times visibly one minor inconvenience away from a complete mental breakdown. Shang Qinghua has not slept in ten years. Shang Qinghua has cried four times today and only two of them were fake. Shang Qinghua spends at least 15 years thinking his crush, who is his boss, is going to murder him someday. Shang Qinghua is a spy who lacks the necessary temperament to be a spy. Shang Qinghua is in charge of logistics for the largest cultivation sect AND probably also the northern kingdom of the demon realm. Shang Qinghua is deficient in at least six major vitamins and minerals probably. He is NOT by ANY stretch of the imagination “the sunshine one”.

[vergilberg]

i am just so heavily homosexual for josh brolin

[evansbby]

The second love interest is OBVIOUSLY Andy Barber 🤪🤪

The way it wouldn’t even be a love triangle if it was Andy Barber 😭😭😭 like Ari wouldn’t even have to worry shhdjsjsjs

[lethalwizard]

shhdjsjsj now he’s going “if you’re feeling sick on the journey there are sick bags provided. i call em number three bags”

the longhaul bus i’m on has a prerecorded message with stuff like “if you smoke on the coach you may be asked to leave and the driver is keeping up this running commentary like “no you will be Told to leave” akdkdjsjsjs