#short and punchy and so much fun

[bitegore]

baru cormorant seems to me to be a series that suffers miserably for me having read machineries of empire first. unfortunately everything BC is doing strikes me as something MoE did better and more believably and with much a greater and more grounded eye for how systems, complex system interaction, and oppression like. work

[fixyourwritinghabits]

Hi! I saw that post that you reblogged about prose losing interiority, and upon reflection I definitely see that in my writing! However, I think I tend to do this because of a piece of advice that I saw once that said something to the effect of 'get rid of all your verbs like thought/wanted/believed etc.'. So how do you balance those two things?

The short answer, unfortunately, is that you just have to balance it. The longer answer is that you need to take a step back from your work and view it in terms of clarity. Yes, it's a good idea to see if you can cut down on thought/wanted/believed/etc in many cases. Often these words leave you with simplified sentences that would be much better if you found ways to write them without these words.

But like all rules in writing, this is not ironclad. Consider the following:

Peter was a short, round man who insisted on wearing suits at all times. Sarah thought he looked like a penguin.

If we are using limited-singular POV (first or third), we can shorten that last sentence to "He looked like a penguin" and there is implicit understanding that this is Sarah's opinion. But if we are using an omniscient narrator, in which we may get the viewpoint of many characters, we need to know that this is Sarah's opinion explicitly. Peter, in fact, might look perfectly fine, and Sarah's just being judgy. An omniscient narrator benefits more from using these kind of verbs.

However, even when limited-singular POV, there are times when we still want to use those verbs. Sometimes, your story will benefit from short, punchy sentences. For example:

Peter was a short, round man who insisted on wearing suits at all times that made him look like a penguin. Sarah desperately wanted to kiss him.

Could we express the above last sentence in a more lengthy way? Of course we can. But in some cases, verbs like want/believe/thought/knew/etc do the job.

Those cases, unfortunately, come down to trying out a sentence or paragraph in a few different ways in editing. You might have to experiment. That can be fun or frustrating, depending on your approach, but it's always worth it if something about your sentence structure feels off.

[pookie-mulder]

March 2025 fic roundup

(Previous months here)

💒😷 half-sick of shadows by pookie_mulder (yours truly!)

Gotta shout out my first xf fic! I wrote it in my head when I couldn’t sleep, texted @skelavender about it, and got convinced to write it irl. (Thanks everyone for being so encouraging!)

If you like cancer arc angst, unconventional marriage, and shameless platonic flirting, give it a shot!

⛈️😴 Coming Back by Karen Rasch

This one is for the hurt/comfort fans! Scully needs some TLC dealing with the fallout of her abduction. Very sweet and heartwarming!

🦷💚 Petrichor by @aloysiavirgata

I’ve been reading a lot of casefics that deal with fairies recently. This one takes place post-Amir Fati and deals with a Mulder and Scully who spent a single night together and went back to ignoring their feelings (can anyone say RST to URT (unresolved romantic tension?). It’s flirty and adorable, and the case is super interesting!

🍸🥴 Good Vibrations by lysandra31

While taking care of a drunk Scully, Mulder discovers she has a… “collection” of her own. Seriously, this fic is as hot as it can get without being outright smut. What I wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall the next day….

🪦💀 What We Do in the Trees by @wtfmulder

I love a good southern gothic vibe, and this fic definitely fits the bill! It takes place during the cancer arc, and the way the case makes Scully ponder how Mulder will mourn her is a wonderful gut punch.

🏜️🌵 Doorway to the Gods by @wtfmulder

Gah!! I don’t want to say too much about this fic — it’s best if you go in mostly blind. Suffice it to say it’s deliciously captivating, the writing is delectable, the smut will break your heart, and the character arcs it explores will make you want to lay on the floor and stare up at the ceiling. I want more of it!!!

🌲⛰️ Acadia by rivkat

You know what? @fine-nephrit wrote an excellent review of this fic that convinced me to read it. Just go read their post if you want to know what makes this one so amazing!

👦🏻🧥 Lacuna by @aloysiavirgata

Another casefic. This one is less about the case and more about Scully’s psyche. It delves deep into her desires for the future, her frustration with her situation, and conflicting feelings about Mulder. It’s wonderful and fascinating!

👨‍🌾🤰 A Thin Veneer by Analise

This post-colonization story is more of a casefic than anything else. Mulder and Scully are living in a small community of cabins in the middle of nowhere, just trying to survive. Mulder returns from a supply-gathering mission to a stranger at the camp and has to make sense of what he saw out in the world to keep his growing family safe.

It’s super fun to put the pieces together as more information is revealed! The stakes are high, the writing is compelling, and the OCs are interesting. Definitely recommend this one!

👽👯‍♂️ All the Mulders by Alloway

This short fic is undeniably weird (in a good way). It’s probably unlike any other fic you’ve ever read. It deals with one aspect of post-colonization life I’ve never considered and makes you ponder what makes a person a person. Anyway, give it a try!

🛋️🧠 Normal Conversations by Soronia

This is an author I just discovered who deserves way more attention in the fandom! Their writing style is so unique, and their fics had me giggling like a schoolgirl.

In this one, Mulder goes to Kersh-mandated therapy, acts like Josh Lyman in Noel, and absolutely ravishes Scully. In that order.

The dialogue is punchy, the psychoanalysis is brutal and cutting, and the smut is unbelievably hot. Please, do yourself a favor and read this fic asap!

⚾️🧢 Home Base by Soronia

The Unnatural is in my top 3 favorite episodes, so this was right up my alley! The flirting and banter and teasing are soooo well-done. Plus, M&S make good use of Mulder’s desk at the end, so there’s something for everyone.

💉🔥 Later by Soronia

After being exposed to a mysterious drug, our favorite agents suddenly can’t keep their hands to themselves. It’s hot, but also has such a great understanding of their relationship. I especially loved Scully’s POV; it was such a refreshing take on her feelings for Mulder. (Also, the final chapter is probably my favorite version of Skinner I’ve ever read! Somebody buy that poor man a drink.)

⏰📰 The Sin Eater by Jane Mortimer

This time-travel fic is short, but so interesting! Scully experiences missing time and must put together the pieces of what really happened. I don’t want to tell you any more than that — just go read it!

🪨🎨 Ever After by Jill Selby

This fic features time travel like you’ve never seen it before. Caught between two times and gravely injured, Scully must figure out what’s happening before it’s too late. It’s positively riveting, and every detail that’s revealed makes you yearn more for the full picture!

🛁💌 Clinical Detachment & Journey by Zuffy

(Clinical Detachment is the prequel — honestly, you can take it or leave it.)

In Journey, Scully must disappear to ensure her safety. I don’t want to tell you any more than that — it’s so fun to see the pieces come together and wrap your mind around the logistics of what happened.

———

P. S. I’m always happy for recs! You guys know by now the type of stuff I love, so if you encounter anything you think I’d like, send it my way!

[lovebugism]

hi hello angel! i have a prompt request <3 “it’s nine in the morning, are you seriously already in swimming trunks?” with steve x punchy... i imagine some cute scenes by steve's pool, maybe some sm*t maybe not dealers choice ! i just love those two sweethearts

thanks so much for your request! and for giving me the opportunity to write more punchy x steve!! hope you like it!! — the one where steve buys his summer hating gf a bathing suit (1.9k)

bug's summer fic fest ♡

No parents. Big house. The perfect concoction for you and Steve to play Old Married Couple whenever work permitted it. 

He closed at Family Video the day before while you slaved over a fourteen-hour shift — just so you could have the weekend off together. The aching bones, tired feet, and frustration-induced migraine were worth it, though. Because it meant waking up in the arms of your boyfriend without either of you having to be in a rush come sunrise.

And even though you remember falling asleep with Steve’s arm wound tightly around your waist — because you spent a good five minutes arguing about the way his palm laid on the pudge of your stomach — you wake up with the boy nowhere to be found.

You rouse before you’re ready to that morning, freezing without the furnace of Steve Harrington and furry chest holding you. You curl beneath his plaid sheets and bury your face into his navy blue pillow. The lingering scent of his musky cologne and floral shampoo does little to quell your yearning.

You decide to go on the hunt for the lost boy.

Still in your pajamas from the night before — a wrinkled Hellfire shirt, a rather modest pair of cotton underwear, and smudged makeup you were too tired to take off the night before — you trek through the empty Harrington household.

“Stevie?” you call for him. Your only answer is an eerie silence. You try again. “Steve?”

He’s not in the bathroom or the upstairs den. He’s not in the living room downstairs, either, or in the adjacent kitchen. He’s quite literally nowhere, and the feeling of affirmed loneliness settles like a brick in the pit of your empty stomach.

Turns out, No Parents, Big House was only fun when Steve was there to share it with you.

You convince yourself he’s probably out getting breakfast for the both of you and didn’t want to wake you up before he left — because he’s way too sweet for his own good. So you decide to busy yourself in wait for him. You pour yourself a coffee from the bubbling machine, sloshing the heady brown liquid into a Snoopy mug you found in the back of the cabinet.

The sliding glass door a little ways behind you whirs violently when it’s opened with a too aggressive hand. The sound of it makes your heart lurch with fleeting panic. Your head whips over your shoulder in the direction of the sound. Drops of coffee spill onto the marble countertop as you flinch.

Steve enters the house then, wearing nothing but a pair of red shorts and black sunglasses — his lean torso and accompanying umber chest hair totally on display. He’s beaming like the yellow sun outside at the sight of you. His honey eyes twinkle with mirth as his hand pushes his RayBans to the top of his messy hair. 

“Oh. Hey, babe,” the boy greets with a tightlipped grin as he shuts the glass door behind him.

With one hand on your racing heart, you shove the coffee pot back into place. “Where were you— It’s nine in the morning, Steve! Why the hell are you already in swimming trunks?”

Steve’s gotten used to how loudly you speak sometimes. It’s usually when you’re happy, sometimes when you’re angry, and on the rarer occasion that something’s frightened you. He likes when you’re enthusiastic and talking his ear off, though, because he hates when you get quiet.

If loudmouth, glittering, sunshine-coated Punchy is ever not talking, something very, very bad has happened.

“In my defense, I’ve been up since seven, alright?” Steve contends, laughing softly to himself. As he walks further into the kitchen, you see he’s adorned his outfit with a pair of rubber sandals. They flip-flop, flip-flop against the tile with every stride. “I went for a run, took a shower, got you coffee—”

He motions to the cardboard cups sitting side by side on the island countertop. The former has been relieved from its lid and most of the sugary content inside. The latter is still intently covered in attempts to keep it warm. In your fleeting alarm and distant heartache, your eyes completely missed them.

“Oh…” you hum quietly in response, still clutching the warm Snoopy mug in your cold hands. “Thank you…”

You walk the short distance to the kitchen island and set the ceramic cup on the counter. You pop the lid off the lukewarm coffee — already adorned with your usual two creams, three sugars combo. You pour the liquid into the mug until it’s filled to the very brim. Steve watches with a distant smile as you take a careful sip from it, mindful not to spill it.

“And since it’s such a nice day outside, I wanted to get a jump on it and head out there,” the boy continues with a shrug. He leans his head to his freckled shoulder as he grins down at you. “I was waiting for you to wake up so I could spend it with you…”

You mirror his too cute posture, tilting your own head and peering up at him through your lashes. Bits of mascara are still smudged around your eyes as you blink up at him. “Well, that’s very sweet of you, Stevie.”

He wraps you in his arms, two golden limbs winding around your waist. Your shoulder presses into the center of his bare chest when he pulls you into him.

He watches you take another slow sip of your milky brown coffee — always so attentive in the way he gazes at you, like he’s checking to make sure you’re okay. You don’t make a face like it’s burned you or like he’s gotten you the wrong order, so he smiles. 

“Go get your swimsuit on, alright? We’re poolin’ all day today, babe.”

“Ew, no. Gross,” you grumble, shrugging your shoulder as you halfheartedly writhe in his arms. “I wasn’t made to be outside, okay? I am not a creature of sunshine, Steven.”

His pink lips jut softly out as his brows furrow. “Hm. That’s weird. ‘Cause you’re my sunshine.”

Your nose scrunches up at him, obviously discontent with his compliment.

The look makes him grin. “Exactly,” he coos before leaning down to kiss the tip of your rumpled nose.

“I don’t even have a bathing suit here! Or, like, at all.”

“I bought you one,” Steve shrugs.

You squint at him. “No, you didn’t…”

“Yes, I did,” he singsongs. “It’s in the dresser with my swim trunks. The—”

“Bottom drawer,” you finish for him, still a bit monotoned with contempt.

It makes the two of you grin like a couple of lovesick idiots. There was hardly anything more domestic than knowing how someone organizes their wardrobe — sharing a part of it with them even more so. But the gooey, warm, marshmallow fluff thought is swiftly eclipsed by your distant disdain for the bathing suit he bought you.

It’s not even that it’s ugly or anything, because it’s actually quite cute. It’s made even cuter by the idea that your pretty boy got it for you — that he saw it and thought of you because he loves you. But it goes against everything in your personal Punchy Doctrine. 

You never really learned how to swim, and the sun is your arch nemesis in the summertime — because your pretty all-black outfits do not fare well in the heat. You hate bikinis even more. Mostly because you feel like they’re a direct result of the patriarchal male gaze and your body is nothing if not a symbol of protest.

But you do love Steve. And Steve isn’t like the assholes that used to ogle at you in your swimsuit or sneer at you for not having a flat stomach.

Steve loved you, and you loved him back, so you decide to humor him and wear it despite everything that tells you not to.

“Ooh,” the boy singsongs when you walk through the sliding glass door. He’s already sprawled out on one of the lounge chairs beside the glittering blue pool. He’s tossed a towel over the one beside him for you and preemptively dragged it several inches closer. You laugh as he announces to no one, “Look how pretty my girlfriend is!”

“Shut up,” you grouse and shut the door behind you.

The early morning heat is tolerable, but still all consuming. The humidity sticks to your bare skin with an inescapable grip as the sun pierces every inch of you it can touch. You’re already mourning the cold of Steve’s house. Not a creature of sunshine, indeed.

“Do you like it?” he asks, squinting at you through his sunglasses.

You cross your arms as you peer down at him. “Do you want me to answer that honestly or…?”

“It’s perfect for you! What do you mean?” Steve argues, his voice several octaves higher as he rises from his seat. He swings his legs off the side of it and uses his glasses to push back his wild honey hair. His hands gesticulate wildly as he continues. “It’s black — which I know is your favorite color — and it’s got spiderwebs on it because I know you’re into… spiders, and… weird stuff…”

“And what about the cutouts on the side, huh?” you tease in a lilt. “What’s that for?”

A boyish grin tugs at Steve’s pink mouth as his eyes flit to your hips. The high-waisted bottoms are slatted along the sides to reveal large sections of your skin. Your hips pokes out beneath them, not quite as slim as the designer intended. You wear your pudge with pride anyway, especially with the way Steve looks at you. His eyes twinkle with lust and adoration and sunshine.

“That was just a little treat for me,” the boy confesses with an innocuous shrug.

You scoff. “Right.”

“Well… for what it’s worth… I think you look really pretty, Punchy.”

You meet his sincere glimmer with a beam. Your eyes trail over his muscular form, marveling silently at the way his chest glitters golden beneath the sun and how his trunks bunch up to reveal more of his thighs.

For a second, you can’t believe he’s yours — that Punchy ended up with Steve The Hair Harrington. But then you realize that he is yours, and that you can kiss him silly because you’re his, too.

“You look really pretty, too, Stevie,” you gush as you launch yourself into his lap, a bit more aggressively than you intended to.

He huffs at your sudden weight, but hugs you back when your arms wrap around his neck. He eases the both of you back into the lounge chair, with you resting most of your weight on top of him.

“You plan on staying like this all day, babe?” he asks, laughing and hoping you’ll say yes.

“Yep,” you affirm before the words leave his mouth, half-muffled because you’re talking into his neck.

“Even if it gets too hot?”

“Especially if it gets too hot,” you joke. You pull back from him slightly to find the boy smiling at you, one eye squinted shut to hide from the sun. You beam back at him, brighter. “You’re too sexy not to hang on to, Steve Harrington. I don’t think I can let you go.”

“Good,” Steve hums back. His fingers squeeze the sides of your hips, warm and reassuring. “I don’t think I want you to me go.”

[yo-yo-yoshiko]

random question: of the heisei era kamen riders which one do you think is the best as an intro to kamen rider?

Yo, yo hi Anon! I left a short reply on Ultra's post too and I second her recommendations, they're really good!(If you are an unrelated party never mind that though!!) Admittedly, my expertise is far lesser than with Sentai so can't really speak to a season that will give someone the best impression of the Kamen Rider series at large, but I hope I can at least recommend something that would be enjoyable.

That being said I encourage the toku crowd that follows me here to reply with any suggestions if there is a particularly good starter season you wanna champion, for my benefit as well perhaps aahaha!

(some synopses and pitches of my own under the cut)

My first two thoughts were Ghost and Build...

Ghost was one of the Rider seasons I started with when I began watching in earnest. I get the impression that it is a less popular series but i hold a lot of positive feelings towards it.

Ghost is a hero that gains his powers from famous deceased historical figures(and also he can walk through walls, disappear, and fly). It is a more gentle season of Rider in my opinion, less gut-wrenching twists, an easy to follow storyline with melancholy leaning themes regarding life and death and loss, and doing what you can while you can, and doing it with feeling, while still being enjoyably silly and bright! Go into this one with love in your heart lol!

It also has the cutest rider design in my opinion(the sole reason i started watching this one haha!), he looks like this:

He has a little hoodie!!

I also love the supporting cast a lot, and there is a crossover movie with the Rider after him where they fight pacman!!!

---

Build seems to me to be a really popular series of the late Hesei era and I enjoyed it a lot. It has a really punchy action-science vibe that swings expertly between comedic and tragic tones. Like seriously its SO funny but it also HURTS!! I recommend this one if you're looking for the high-energy emotional whiplash that people like to talk about with KR.

In Build, Japan had been split into three little mini-countries and our heroes have to deal with the politics of that for a good portion of the show all while dealing with their own personal battles, and trying to decide where their allegiances lie(with themselves? their countries? their friends? with who they were in the past?).

our main hero is an amnesiac, self-aggrandizing, scientific genius who has partnered with a big, lovable idiot with rocks for brains and powerful fists, to protect the people! the Primary/Secondary Rider dynamic in this series is an iconic one and for good reason, i think!

Half of that dynamic: Banjou Ryuuga... I love him a lot!

(Their tertiary Kamen Rider Grease is great too, if there was ever a guy who was the power of friendship but also kinda mean about it aahaha!)

---

If you like older tv from the early 2000s and a bit of a more grungy vibe(less hyper-color) you may enjoy an early heisei series Like 555(often also spelled Faiz) or Agito.

Faiz is a fascinating sort of character drama with interesting dynamics and a range of very unique personalities. They all really go through it from episode one too, so I was pretty white knuckled through the whole thing, having my emotions battered, but that's what I'm into aahah!

The plot is sort of centered around a battle between a few humans and an organization of evolved people called orphenochs that are working to replace the old humanity as the dominant species. I especially enjoyed the orphenoch roommates, a trio who were varying levels of sympathetic to humanity's struggle in the series.

I enjoyed Faiz himself a lot too, he's pretty ill-mannered and took a lot of coercing to get him to join up, and it was fun to follow the absolutely abysmal relationships he formed with his new friends eventually develop into something meaningful.

There is SO much infighting in this series, and a lot of love-triangle type drama which plays out but I believe that's part of the appeal, it was very interesting!

---

I watched Agito on a whim once a while before I'd earnestly gotten into the Kamen Rider series(knee deep in sentai at that point and couldn't be distracted aahah!). I think it was technically my second series(after having seen most of the original) so from personal experience I think it's an easy one to start with.

Its another season with incredibly interesting characters. I've seen Agito himself described as a human Animal Crossing villager and that's incredibly accurate. He's an amnesiac fella that likes to cook, clean and tend to his vegetable garden. He is also occasionally compelled to transform and fight Unknown monsters.

He's a real sweetie, so much so that the horrors of his situation just seem to bounce right off of him aahaha!

Agito also has a fun little cop-drama sort of thing going on over with their secondary rider and his circle who have built their own rider system for the police department. It gives me the vibe of a workplace with a lot of underhanded power maneuvering and that's really fun to watch.

It's just generally a very good monster mystery flavored series with a lot of supernatural elements!

(i don't really have any agito pictures aahaha sorry!)

---

The best part about starting Kamen Rider is that you can start almost anywhere if you think a particular season will suit your taste since each is generally self contained save for crossover movies. I hope you land on something you enjoy and have lots of fun!

[alltimecharlo]

i’m (trying to, sos) write a willmack fic atm and i just want your opinion on it because you’re, like. the willmack writer god on here 😭🙏

it’s an au, so. ye. i’m just gonna get into it lmao

mack gets hurt in BU before getting drafted to SJ, so it’s like, maybe halfway through the college season. it isn’t just an injury, though, and it leaves him unable to play hockey for forever. career ending. yay!

SJ had their eyes on him though since like. everyone knew he was going to be the no. 1 draft pick and they’re like “oh noooo celly’s hurt… we still want him in any way shape or form!!!!” and then they offer him a position as one of the coaches for SJ.

development coach btw, because i can already see how it makes sense. helping new players transition to the team (will helloooo???) and doing one on one training??? so much potential in my eyes!!

it sounds a little bland and short, i feel, but i’m trying to write something like a novel in verse, and i dont know if that’s going to make it a little longer, but. im just gonna wing it honestly

anyways sorry for a lil yap but i fr want someones opinion on this :,D

thabk you!!!

oh my god hi!!! first of all i’m so honoured you want my opinion, that’s actually so, so sweet ?? and THANK YOU 🥹🩵 i’m really so glad you like my fics!! (long reply under the cut because i am apparantly incapable of being brief)

okay now onto your idea because HELLO this sounds so fun!! like genuinely something i would read in a heartbeat. the coach/player dynamic is just… mwahh chef’s kiss. 🤌 so much potential for tension and softness and pining and everything delicious.

i also love that you’re doing it as a novel in verse — that’s so cool and unique?? i don’t think it sounds bland or short at all. honestly, that format could make it hit even harder emotionally?? like short, punchy lines that carry all this tension and unsaid stuff between them?? yes yes YES.

also let me let you in on a secret: even when i try to plan my fics, half the time something comes out of nowhere and suddenly i’m winging a whole subplot i never intended. it’s chaotic, but in the best way. some of my favourite scenes came from just following a vibe and figuring it out later — so wing away!! it’s a fun way to write and can lead to so much unexpected creativity.

now onto some random thoughts i had reading your idea (i’m already daydreaming oops):

the coach/player setup gives you SUCH gold for scenes. like. imagine mack correcting will’s form on the ice or in the gym — hand on his back, moving his elbow a little — and from will’s POV he’s just ✨ combusting ✨. or from mack’s POV where he’s trying to be professional and detached and absolutely failing.

are you imagining a slow build? like coach/player to friends to lovers? or more of an “oh no we’ve got tension and we’re pretending we don’t” thing that explodes one day? (because both are amazing. i’m nosy...)

i’m also obsessed with the potential of will being all eager and golden retriever-ish and just so into getting to know mack. like “hey wanna get coffee?” completely earnestly and mack’s like 😳?? because he’s already halfway gone and trying so hard not to be.

BU/BC chirping will feature ofc. the fake bitterness. the "you only chirp someone this much when you're in love with them" energy.

and ooooh the forbiddenness (lightly! fun!) of coach/player is such a good angle. like maybe mack is the one who’s more hesitant because he knows what kind of power imbalance it could be, and he doesn’t want to risk will’s career or his own job, and he doesn’t want to play favourites — even though he obviously already is lol.

there’s also such a rich emotional vein to tap into with mack’s injury — like the grief of losing the career he was supposed to have, being on the other side of the glass now, helping this team that he was meant to play for. especially if they go far. you could explore how he tries to bottle it up and stay professional but it seeps through, and of course will’s the one he ends up unloading all that pain onto 🥲

honestly there is SO much to explore here and you’ve got a really strong foundation already. you’re cooking actually. pls keep going!!! and if you ever want to bounce ideas off someone or scream about the process, i’m here for all of it 🩵

[reverseblackholeofwords]

February Reads!

Vita Nostra by Marina and Sergey Dyachenko: I'm always on the hunt for good magic college books. They are few and far between, but this one?? Tricky. It nails certain things I want from a book about the struggles of higher education, no one wants to attend the Institute of Special Technologies, and it manages to have a magic system that I have certainly never come across before. But oh boy, it does not hold your hand. Dense but overall, worth it, and with an ending that left me scratching my head a little.

In the House in the Dark of the Woods by Laird Hunt: I am never going to shut up about this book ever until I die. Cunning, short, snappy, haunting, this is the perfect horror read for anyone who loves a good old fashioned witch story. I don't want to spoil too much because it's best to go in blind. It's gross. It's classic and still surprising. I love it.

Tales from the Gas Station vol. 1 by Jack Townsend: Taking a sharp turn into left field, this book started as a creepypasta and for better or worse, you can tell. It is so chronically online it's terminal, and so is the main character, Jack, who works at the world's most disturbed gas station. If you love zany, weird fiction with a side of humor, this is such a fun read. Quick and punchy, and I have already ordered the second one.

The Night Guest by Hildur Knútsdóttir: Jumping back over to horror, this one was short but sweet! The only thing worse than ghosts is women's health. If you're sensitive to animal cruelty this one may be a bit icky, but despite everyone's ravings online, I didn't find it to be too over the top. Kind of a fascinating read from the point of view of an American looking in at another country's healthcare system, but I still found it very relatable and spooky!

[arduennas]

i saw wicked!! 8/10 movie very good. i also have many thoughts head full. i fully acknowledge that these thoughts could only belong to the diseased mind of a person who has thought too much about wicked for the last 7+ years. anyway spoilers and general ambivalent thoughts ahead etc

good things first:

cynthia erivo slay!! she was like an average good elphaba imo which means she was incredible by normal standards

set design and choreography ATE. munchkinland? the emerald city? the clockography? ate ate ate

overall the movie was just visually beautiful. it was colorful and sparkly and looked soooo expensive. whenever a new location appeared for the first time i literally gasped. i loved it

elphaba’s party dress was GORGINA 😍😍😍

michelle yeoh and jeff goldblum my beloved evil parents… they can’t sing but idc they were so cunty

they sort of kept the hammerheads in one short day which is all i wanted from that song. wicked is not wicked without the egg puppet freaks

they didn’t add anything from the book thank fucking god

ari was funny and pretty good! will expand on her later. i think they did popular the best they could in a movie format given that the song relies so much on improv, physical comedy, audience response, etc.

neutral to bad things:

ok so ariana. very eyebrow-heavy performance. not bad vocally! it was foul to make her sing with cheno during osd though, the difference in quality was so clear lmao. i’m interested to see how she’ll deal with act 2 both vocally and acting-wise

i didn’t like how light ariana sang throughout the whole movie. idk if she was directed to do this though—i could see them telling her to do glinda less obnoxious or tone down the comedy which i understand for a movie. but come on girl it won’t kill you to do a full belt in the studio ONCE

ariana and cynthia’s voices do not blend well. you can tell cynthia was trying to tone herself down to match ari and ari was just not giving in return

the mixing was weirdly unbalanced in a lot of the duety portions and i couldn’t tell whether it was the fault of the sound design or the actors just not being able to sound good together lol

it fucking DRAGGED. there is a 90-minute edit of this movie that could easily have existed. none of us needed to hear something bad or a sentimental man. they took every small pause in the music and stretched it out to the point where it interrupted the flow of the song AND became patently obvious that they were trying to pad for time. the new part of one short day with idina and kristin was not good and also too long. the added chase scene before defying gravity started out fun but then went on way longer than it should have. the ozdust dance was SO LONG my god. i could write up a whole list of shit that went on pointlessly for way too long but we would be here all day

there are some elphabas who can carry i’m not that girl. cynthia is not one of them and this is my only complaint about her performance. she divafied a song that is not meant to be divafied

dancing though life was arranged and directed badly. for lack of a better term it’s meant to be a stoner song and it was way too punchy. also if you’re going to insist on casting a white fiyero at least make him good #notmyfiyero

the lighting was often not good??? i think because a lot of it was filmed outside and the sun washed out the set or created a glare. some odd color grading choices as well. really weird because otherwise visually the movie was stunning as i said before

this is a criticism of many modern movies, definitely not wicked-specific, but a lot of the the costumes looked cheap and it’s because of productions cutting corners when it comes to materials and tailoring. especially compared to the show costumes which are so intricate and structurally well-made because they’ve had to last for literally 20 years. we need to ban polyester from film sets i’m so serious

glinda and elphaba should have kissed each other on the mouth

[doggernaut]

5, 9, 17!

Thank you for these asks!

5. What's something you learned while researching a fic?

Good question! I'm always looking up little random things, like flight times and locations of things. But big things I've learned? I wouldn't say I have any special knowledge I can pull out about a specific topic due to fic research. Not in the way I remember random details from old New Yorker articles about the history of the disposable diaper, for instance. Huh. I did do a some research about East Coast surfing and tides when I was writing we'll make out and take a mouthful of the summer time, since I'm only familiar with West Coast beaches. But I avoided going into too much surfing detail in that fic.

9. How did you get into writing fanfiction?

I mean, if you want the real answer, it's when I was seven and was mad because I'd finished reading all of Beverly Cleary's Ramona books and my dad suggested I write my own Ramona stories. But I didn't really get into it until like 2006, when a group from the old Fametracker boards decided to write a round robin Baby-Sitters Club fic and I signed up to write a chapter. I took a long break and then wrote a few vey short Parks and Rec fics in 2011 or so, then took another long break before I fell headfirst into the Check, Please fandom. With both Parks and Rec and Check, Please, it was simply because I had ideas that I couldn't stop thinking about. (RIP to the super angsty Parks longfic I never ended up writing but still lives rent free in my head.)

17. What is something you recently felt proud of in your writing?

This is a hard one because writing has been hard lately and I haven't felt like I've written much to be proud of. But I really like this banter from my most recently posted chapter of If I'm not too much for you, then sign me up. (Which ... I really need to buckle down and finish the next chapter...)

Jack raised an eyebrow and Eric knew a chirp was coming. Was it possible for an eyebrow to smirk? Because that was definitely what Jack’s eyebrow was doing. “Didn’t take you for the type to stress about carbs, Bittle. You know, since you’ve written multiple books devoted to dessert.” “I don’t, usually,” Eric said. “But two weeks of nonstop travel does have a way of bringing out my worst habits, and I think it’s safe to say that some things need to change in the new year. I don’t need grilled cheese from the late night room service menu as a late night snack every night.” But grilled cheese was always better when you didn’t have to make it yourself, and it had been so easy to fall into that habit. “Probably not,” Jack agreed, “but don’t go too crazy. You probably should figure out a better balance of carbs and protein, but if I hear that you’re working on a salad cookbook I’m going to start to worry.” “No need to worry, I just realized I can’t remember the last time I ate a green vegetable. Don’t tell my kids; they’ll be thrilled if this becomes a trend.” “I don’t know, I think it would be kind of fun to let them know the truth about their dad,” Jack chirped. “I don’t think Sam and Lizzie would mind eating grilled cheese every night. I could totally sabotage your efforts to ever get them to eat a vegetable again.” “You wouldn’t!” Eric gasped in mock horror.  “Nah,” Jack said. “But I do have some extra tubs of protein shake mix from one of my sponsors. I’ll bring one over when we’re both back in town.” “Oh my god, what did I do to deserve this?” Eric said with a laugh. “You know what? Fine. Bring all the protein powder. Maybe it’ll inspire my next dessert. I’ll call it the Zimmermann Special.” Jack bumped Eric with his shoulder. “You’re punchy tonight. I like it.” “Well, somebody ordered dessert drinks after we drank that bottle of wine,” Eric retorted.  “Somebody demanded a taste of my drink with the excuse of quality control.” “Oh, hush. I told you when we ordered that I couldn’t decide. You said I could try yours,” Eric reminded Jack. Then, realizing they’d walked several blocks and he hadn’t been really been paying attention to where they were, he glanced at the map on his phone. “I think I’m this way,” he said, nodding in the direction of his hotel. Jack’s was two blocks over. “I’ll walk you the rest of the way,” Jack said. 

[aporeticelenchus]

While struck down by Covid (alas, alack, etc), I’ve been watching operas on my mom’s Met Opera account. So far we’ve gotten through:

Barber of Seville (2007, Peter Mattei and Joyce DiDonato):

Charming! A delight! I want to spend more time with the music later to get a better sense of individual movements. Largo Al Factotum looms large and is as good as promised. I enjoyed Peter Mattei as Figaro and Joyce DiDonato as Rosina a lot too! Bartolo’s patter songs are fun. Looking forward to hearing those again.

Marriage of Figaro (1998; Bryn Terfel and Cecilia Bartoli as Figaro and Susanna; Renee Fleming and Dwayne Croft as Countess and Count):

Finally watched a Figaro production after listening to it a million times! Also a delight! For some reason they switched out Susanna’s two solo arias, which threw me. I saw some reviewers thought Cecilia Bartoli did a little too much physical comedy, but I really liked her. Renee Fleming was a great countess; Porgi Amor is still a dead bore to me but that’s not her fault. Cherubino was adorable, but seemed to struggle a bit with Non So Piu.

This continues to be my favorite opera, and I enjoyed this as a production. I plan to watch the other two productions available on the Met on Demand later.

Don Giovanni (2000; Bryn Terfel, Renee Fleming, Solveig Kringelborn, Hei-Kyung Hong):

I’ve now spent enough time with Don Giovanni to have an opinion: it’s good, but I don’t like it nearly as much as Figaro. The plot flow and pacing frustrate me. There are some standout musical moments, but also some parts that drag (hi act 2 Donna Anna). I do love La Ci Darem and Hei-Kyung Hong’s Zerlina was charming. Finch’Han Dal Vino and Deh Vieni A La Finestra are songs I enjoy from Don G, and of course Lepprello’s little list is fun. Donna Elivra generally has good music behind her, as does Act 1 Donna Anna.

Does Don Ottavio need to be in this opera? I’m just…not sure he does….

Every time I hear the Statue sing “Don Giovaaaaaaaannnnniiii” at the end, my brain fills in “from thy dark exile thou art suuuuuuumoned”, and it took me a bit to realize I was pulling that from Iolanthe. I like to think it’s a deliberate musical homage by Sullivan.

I definitely want to watch some more stagings of Don Giovanni; overall I enjoy the opera and I can imagine it changing a lot with different directorial choices.

Die Fledermaus (1986, Kiri Te Kanawa, Judith Blegan, Tatiana Troyanos, and some men probably)

I love an operatta. I love a dumb musical comedy. I love a catchy waltz I can’t get out of my head. Two thumbs up; great use of my time listening, bad use of my time trying to follow the details of the plot because it did not really matter. Special shout out to the Overture for being a jam. It almost renders the rest of the operetta superfluous.

A+ joke having an opera singer character who won’t stop singing during the talky bits. Love that the prince is a trouser role; that helped me through some of the dumb gender stuff elsewhere.

Total blast. I plan to listen to some more recording, including two English-language adaptations. (The POP Opera project did their English-language adaptation set in 1920s Hollywood; that’s on my short list to watch) I think I like J Strauss II!

Carmen (2014; Anita Rachvelishvili and Aleksanders Antonenko)

I’ve seen Carmen before, but it’s been awhile. My mom loves Carmen; I…struggle with it. Maybe it’s just my pro-comedy bias.

The music is very good, of course; the Habañera and Toreador song are some of the most recognizable music today for a reason. The Act 1 overture is great! Short and punchy! I think the opera might be growing on me musically as I listen to it more; I’ve found the group numbers initially overwhelming, but with a little more time i can better parse the music and find parts I really like.

But anyway, I liked most of this production! I thought the Carmen was compelling, and Don Jose was a good singer (I just hate his character a lot). The set deign (1930s Spain vibes) worked for me, which was a pleasant surprise.

Going to see La Boheme tonight! Wish me luck.

[texasthoughtsaboutnothing]

The Stranger and my thoughts on where each LCB Sinner is at (Long)

Hey, I actually sat down and read L'etranger, Meursault's source novel. I've got some fucking feelings about it, especially relating it to Limbus Company and what it might mean for his Canto in like 2 years.

Firstly, you should read or listen to this book. It's short, surprisingly punchy, and easy to follow. I (probably) don't have autism but I can absolutely see a read of this where the character does or is neurodivergent in some other way; beyond his relationship and evaluation of social queues and norms he also seems to deal with sensory issues. There are better people than me who should talk about this and I'm probably not adding a lot to the conversation but keeping this reading in my head for the climax added an extra layer of discomfort (intentional discomfort for the benefit of the story's message, I should say) to the whole book. But It's worth experiencing even if you disagree with that reading or have a different one.

Limbus Brainrot/Spoiler stuff from here on in.

There's always the question of where exactly each Sinner is in their story as they're on the bus. Their stories have been reinterpreted and/or jumbled in ways that make it fun to guess, so to go over each Sinner and where they are based on what we know or my theories:

Yi Sang - I'm not gonna front, I don't really get The WIngs, but this seems like a Good End AU for him. He already escaped his "Wife's" control and the sunless room and is now flying again (metaphorically, or maybe literally? i dont know help me).

Faust - Likely in the middle of the part where she's using Mephistopheles' power to do good in the world and prior to her being damned to hell. Side note, she's last to get a Canto and I bet it's not a coincidence that (afaik) she and Dante are the only two with Hell in their stories directly. My long shot call is that Faust is also Beatrice and there will be so much DantexFaust ship art in 2026.

Don Quixote - The biggest enigma. La Sangre de Sancho has gripped the imagination of the fandom and I am no exception. She's next after Heathcliff so we'll get her some time in August at the latest and I can't wait. My best guess is she's currently gallivanting and will be forced home in her Canto, assuming Don is Sancho theory isn't true. Praying her Canto is called The Impossible.

Ryoshu - In Hell Screen, the reason the painter is obsessed with torture is that he can only paint what he has seen and is trying to paint the Buddhist Hell. In his quest for his art he destroys his life and those around him, and ends up committing suicide over it. But there is a villain in the form of the Lord who beyond driving the story by requesting the screen in the first place is guilty of SA and murder. I'm expecting we're post story; the Lord is related to the five fingers, the daughter might be recast as a friend or something, and the sword Ryoshu carries is likely the screen. Nothing revolutionary in my guesses here, but it's either going to be that straight-forward or insanely abstract, where she's the lord and the painter and the daughter and the screen and the sword is the monkey or some shit.

Hong Lu - I have not yet read Dream of a Red Chamber, it's next on the list. Forgive me!

Heathcliff - Oh boy. Like many, I expect he is post-spurning by Catherine and is on his journey for his fortune on the LCB. So, his Canto will be about coming home to a beloved who is with someone else. Yes, the beloved blorbo will suffer for my amusement. Let's go 3 hours Heathmael sex scene!

Ishmael - We now know her story already kinda happened, as many expected, making this a bizarre sequel to Moby Dick. I think it gave PM a lot of room to do whatever they wanted to while still sticking to the themes of the story. Already wrote about what I loved about this and the recontextualizing of Ahab as a whale unto herself (which I don't actually know if it's in the original novel, but it wouldn't surprise me).

Rodion - A weird one. Her inciting incident happened, the murdering of the landlord/pawnbroker, but the unintentional death of the innocent sister was shifted to the entire damn block. So if I had to guess she's in the period after her crime trying to avoid being caught, but no police officer allegory has really been introduced yet. I read Crime and Punishment years ago so I can't say for certain but it feels the most loosely adapted and suffers a tad for being part of the intro. Rodya's story is in no way finished so it's up in the air. Praying for a Petrovich just so people can meet the OG Columbo.

Sinclair - Still need to read Demian, but I have a rough understanding of the plot. Also unfinished in his story, Sinclair has a long way to go to his self-realization. This feels more intentional however, I remember someone made an observation of Cinqlair as representative of his drunken college years where he's popular but unfulfilled, and I think we can extend that to all of his IDs. He seems to have the most potential of all the Sinners, so much so that I wouldn't be surprised if there's a mirror world where he's a Color unto himself. I digress, the point is he's pre Frau Eva (who if she turn's out to be the Purple Tear I will lose my mind) who is also called Beatrice at some point so what's up with that PM?

Outis - Another big mystery, especially as she isn't Odysseus but Outis, a name referencing a particular part of the Odyssey with the Cyclops. I have to imagine she's on the Odyssey, journeying home after the Smoke War (which might have some parallels with the Trojan War beyond the obvious). It's interesting all the Greek myth named Abnormalities are Hospital themed, might be something there but nothing I can parse from my limited knowledge of Greek society and folklore. While she' might be a traitor, I'm thinking she's joined Limbus Company to hide while on her journey; she might be wanted dead by something and is concealing her identity after what happened in the war.

Greg - Again, a character post-story. He was locked in a room, he metamorphized, and... well he's alive? So we've diverged from the source novel, as it's taken the allegorical meanings and made them more literal, but Hermann is still around and a major player so who knows where this will go?

Meursault - I have so many thoughts. Meursault could be anywhere in his story, but I'm going to guess it's one of two places. First guess, we're completely pre story. His Canto opens with him getting a message that Maman died today, or maybe yesterday, he doesn't know. So the whole story plays out over the course of the Canto. But more likely, and my prediction, is that he's currently in "jail" awaiting his execution or acquittal. He has already murdered a man (or done some other crime) and instead of being tried for that, he has been tried and sentenced for his peculiarities of character. Bound in the chains of others, the multitudes have tightened their hold (I'm very clever and not cringe at all).

So I have to wonder what light blinded him, overwhelmed him so much that it led to his crime? The Bright Nights and Dark Days are an obvious choice, and I'm not the first to suggest it. Perhaps he distorted? Anyway, his story ends with him having given up on acquittal and instead hoping for a crowd of people hating him as he approaches the guillotine. I'm super interested in how this will play out in Limbus, especially as he must survive for gameplay purposes.

Also, Meursault is so horny. Like, oh my god. Half of his thoughts are of Marie, specifically of wanting her and all the connotations that contains. He spurns God in the face of a Chaplain, saying that He is worth nothing compared to a single hair on a woman's head. Meursault is not a romantic but not just some horndog either, his desire for sex and women and their bodies feels like an extension of his worldview centered on the immediacy of life and not just debauchery or hedonism. It's a part of the idea life is lived as today, yesterday, and tomorrow, and there is joy and happiness in that simplicity. I feel like this will get cut for Limbus but I hope it isn't, I want Meursault to casually admit he desires every Sinner on the bus carnally (yes the men and NB too, probably just a HC but I do believe that the City is a binormative society based on its already loose relationship to gender identity).

So uh, that's the thoughts so far. Merry Christmas, I guess.

[the-meat-machine]

Hi. I'm rereading Playing House to refresh myself on it, and I decided to write some author's commentary as I go along, just for fun. This commentary will contain spoilers for the fic up to chapter 17 (the most recent chapter as of the time of writing).

So, yeah. Chapter 1 commentary, under the cut! (And for the record, I don't expect all the commentary to be as long as this one is; I just have a lot to say about the fic in general in this first one.)

CALIBORN: DIRK. WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY PANTS.

Ah, humble beginnings.

When I first started this fic, it was just supposed to be a silly, raunchy ovi fic that I was banging out for fun in between some of my more serious stories. It had a little plot right from the start, but the plot was pretty much entirely just "an egg happens." There wasn't nearly as much stuff about Dirk and Caliborn's relationship as a whole, and DEFINITELY none of the stuff about… well, whatever it is Caliborn is time traveling about in the most recent chapter.

But as I was writing it, I gradually started folding in ideas from a separate Dirkuu relationship study that I was considering writing, and within a few chapters I decided to just merge the two fics into one. Which I think was the right call, in retrospect. I really think the story is a lot more fun this way, and the egg has worked out as a surprisingly good framing device for everything else going on.

But at the time when I was writing this first chapter, I didn't know any of that. This was supposed to be nothing more than a horny egg fic, and the chapter reflects that. It's also much shorter than most of the following chapters. I kinda like how short and punchy it is, actually. I have perhaps become a little too long-winded in some of the later chapters. Actually, that happens almost immediately, as we'll see in the chapter 2 commentary.

Caliborn literally hisses at you. You assume it's supposed to be a threat, but the sight of his tongue winding out from between all those sharp, sharp fangs mostly just makes your dick go doki-doki.

The first appearance of Caliborn's tongue. Dirk's preoccupation with Caliborn's tongue and fangs surely does not mirror the author's.

DIRK: Face it, between your skeletal posterior and my own tragically concave rump, ours is a no-ass household. DIRK: When the ass famine comes, we'll be the first to perish.

This is still one of my favorite lines in the whole fic.

CALIBORN: MAYBE YOU USED THEM TO MANIPULATE THE JADE BITCH. INTO REMOTELY TAMPERING WITH MY TROUSERS. DIRK: Dude. DIRK: What did I tell you about calling my friends bitches? CALIBORN: … CALIBORN: ……….. CALIBORN: …………………………… CALIBORN: THAT EVERY TIME I DO IT. IT MEANS YOU GET TO PICK OUR NEXT MOVIE DURING DATE NIGHT.

Here we also get the first appearance of Dirk attempting to dog-train Caliborn into being a marginally less shitty person. This will come up again with absurdly long-reaching consequences in the Jane chapter.

This line also implies that Dirk considers Jade his friend. That would be a great dynamic to explore. Probably won't happen in this fic, though, alas. Maybe I'll post a deleted scene about it someday.

Also, it may be interesting to note the quantity of punctuation that Caliborn uses. Eleven is a thematic number for the cherubs, and Caliborn frequently repeats things in sets of eleven throughout both Homestuck itself and this fic.

DIRK: What's the magic word? CALIBORN: FUCK YOU! DIRK: Eh, close enough.

Dirk cares far more about Caliborn being rude to his friends than he does about him being rude to Dirk himself. Almost nothing Caliborn does really bothers Dirk on a personal level. This is part of why they're so compatible. It also gives Dirk yet another reason to doubt his own morality. What does it say about him that he's so emotionally unfazed by any of the awful shit this dude says and does? (It says that he has low affective empathy. That's all. Doesn't mean he's a bad person. Try convincing Dirk of that, though.)

CALIBORN: IF YOU DO NOT FIX THIS. YOUR POSITION IN OUR GAME OF "HOUSE" WILL BE IN JEOPARDY.

Ah, House.

My very earliest plans for this fic didn't involve the game of House. All I wanted was to write a silly story about Dirk and Caliborn laying an egg.

The problem with writing anything remotely fluffy about Caliborn, however, is that in canon, he truly and genuinely just wants to fucking kill everyone. He WILL kill Dirk. He WILL kill all of Dirk's friends. This is a core part of his goals. So… how do you get him into a place where he won't just slaughter everyone and be done with it?

In this fic, I've resolved this by giving Caliborn a different game that he's decided he's playing: House. Now he's constrained by a new set of rules--ones that say he has to try to play nice. That he needs to learn assorted domestic skills. And perhaps most importantly, that he can't just fucking murder all of his opponent/partner(?)'s friends--because if he does, he'll lose the game. And Caliborn cannot abide losing a game.

Someday we'll get more about why, exactly, Caliborn has decided to play this game. But for now, all that matters is that he is, and so he's bound by its rules. This turns out to be VERY narratively useful for me.

Not that that's why you've been playing along with his "game", no matter what certain friends of yours might believe. They always do want to think the best of you, and there is absolutely no fucking good explanation for why you would want to shackle yourself to the biggest asshole in Paradox Space. But regardless of your motivations...

Dirk trying really hard here to avoid directly admitting that he's in love with Caliborn, not even in the narration. This will be a running theme.

It occurs to you sometimes that what normal people would actually call this game is "marriage".

Damn, I really just came out and put this right in the first chapter, huh? I mean, it's true though.

CALIBORN: RUB MY BELLY, CUDDLESLUT.

Yeah, so. I started this fic with a scene of Caliborn growing out of his pants and then followed it up immediately with a belly rub scene. I was NOT attempting to be subtle about what kind of fic this is--which is to say, a belly fetish fic. I'm genuinely shocked it's grown to have this much of an audience outside of that community.

The fic HAS grown to encompass a lot more than just the fetish shit, though. I guess by now I'd consider it basically the equivalent of one of those fics that has plenty of plot and character development, but also fairly frequent sex scenes. Except here, half the time instead of sex scenes you just get weirdly lascivious descriptions of how much candy Caliborn is scarfing down. I promise this is hot to some portion of the audience.

DIRK: The fuck have you been eating, dude? CALIBORN: WHY. DIRK: There's like a lump in there. Right here.

And here's the first appearance of the egg! The entire raison d'etre of this fic. Really, what else is there to say about it? It's an egg. It's made of candy. It's inside of Caliborn. Presumably one day it will be outside of Caliborn. One can only hope.

[chrysalis-the-butterfly]

My Thoughts on the Roger Rabbit Novels

Who Censored Roger Rabbit?

The Plot: It's the 1980s, and human beings and comic strip characters ("toons") live side-by-side, albeit not on an equal social standing. Roger Rabbit approaches private detective Eddie Valiant and asks him to investigate a dispute he has with Rocco and Dominick DeGreasy, the brothers who own his comic strip. Roger claims his life is in danger, but Eddie, who's somewhat racist towards toons, doesn't take him seriously - which comes back to bite him when he finds Roger's dead body. Now Eddie has to work out who killed Roger, as well as who killed Rocco DeGreasy on the same night.

What I Liked: This is a very well-paced story. It sets up the mystery straightaway, it cracks along at a good speed, and you don't have the full truth of whodunnit until the very end. The chapters are short and punchy, and even the time spent on plot points that turned out to be red herrings never felt wasted. I was always eager to pick the book up again and read just one more chapter!

Also, in any other novel, the twist regarding Roger's killer would be a massive "What the heck?" moment, but here, it's set up far enough in advance that it doesn't feel unnatural when it comes.

And as a fun minor detail, Eddie casually mentions being one of four children, and then the next novel, Who P-P-P-Plugged Roger Rabbit?, gives him two brothers and a sister! It was probably a coincidence, but I was glad to spot it!

What I Disliked: I really wasn't a fan of the way Jessica Rabbit was portrayed. Who Framed Roger Rabbit subverts her femme fatale image, but Who Censored Roger Rabbit? plays it straight, which didn't appeal to me as much. I prefer the "looks like she could kill you, is actually a cinnamon roll" trope over the "looks like she could kill you, could actually kill you" trope.

At one point in the story, Jessica claims she was forced to pose for a racy comic, but when Eddie speaks to the owner of said comic, the man claims Jessica posed for those pictures willingly and was actually eager to make more. At the time the story was published (1981), one might just about have got away with such a portrayal, but in a post-#MeToo world, it's discomforting that Jessica's allegations of coercion and sexual abuse aren't taken seriously. (Also, the man who owns the racy comic is a creepy crossdresser, which ... what? Why was that in there? That didn't need to be in there.)

As a consequence of Jessica's portrayal, her relationship with Roger is nowhere near as sweet as in the film. Their entire marriage is basically a sham. No, thank you. Give me "honey bunny" and "love cup" instead, please.

Verdict: I saw the film first, and I prefer it to the novel. Who Framed Roger Rabbit will always be my favourite piece of Roger Rabbit media. But I can appreciate Who Censored Roger Rabbit? as its own thing - a product of its time, to be sure, but also a well-structured and fast-paced read.

Who P-P-P-Plugged Roger Rabbit?

The Plot: It's 1947 (more or less), sometime after the events of Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Roger Rabbit, Baby Herman, and Kirk Enigma are three toons in line for the lead role in David Selznick's upcoming adaptation of Gone With the Wind. A box belonging to Selznick, a box of great importance, has gone missing, and Eddie Valiant has been hired to find it.

What I Liked: Who P-P-P-Plugged Roger Rabbit? has my favourite portrayal of Roger (after the film and the comics). We spend a bit more time with him than in the previous book, so we get to hear more about his worldviews and his backstory. We also get to see what a sweetie pie he is. He's an emotional bunny who loves his wife, just like in the film, and I frequently wanted to hug him.

A key highlight for me was the moment when Roger was singing like a Disney Princess and summoning a chorus of birds to wake Eddie one morning, which Eddie did not appreciate. Can someone animate that? I'd love to see it!

The second half of this novel also introduces Jessica's twin sister Joellyn (the six-inch-tall woman on Eddie's shoulder on the cover), and I enjoyed getting to know her. And, without giving away too many spoilers, I greatly preferred this rendition of Jessica over the one in Who Censored Roger Rabbit?

What I Disliked: Unlike the first novel, this one was pretty slow to get going. Eddie isn't actually hired by Selznick until Chapter 7, and most of the time before then is spent establishing Eddie as a down-on-his-luck private eye, using people and locations that show up once and then are barely used again. Some of that fat could have been trimmed, I feel. It made reaching the end of the book a bit more of a slog.

Something else that bothered me was the high volume of old-timey slang, brand names and Americanisms that I, as a twentysomething Brit, did not recognise. I could read an entire paragraph and think, "Well, he's either drinking alcohol, smoking cigar or eating a foodstuff, but I'll be darned if I can tell you which is the right interpretation." I think the noir detective vernacular was slightly overdone, to the point of incomprehension.

Verdict: I thought this would be my favourite of the novels because it seemed the most similar in tone to the film, so I was disappointed by my lukewarm reception to it. Maybe I was disappointed because I'd hyped it up too much in my mind? That's not to say I didn't enjoy it - I greatly preferred the second half to the first, once Eddie found out what was actually in this mysterious box - but I think it could have done with a few more edits before publication.

Who Wacked Roger Rabbit?

The Plot: It's the 1940s or 1950s, sometime after the events of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, and director Barney Sands is shooting a movie set in Toontown starring Gary Cooper and Roger Rabbit. He's been receiving threatening letters warning him to stay away from Toontown and stop making this film, but he can't afford to let down his investors. So he hires Eddie Valiant to be Cooper's bodyguard while filming takes place. But Eddie soon finds himself wrapped up in another mystery, involving a porcine crime lord called Willy Prosciutto and the corpse of Clabber Clown.

What I Liked: The majority of this novel takes place in Toontown, so we get some really cool worldbuilding details. We find out how the school system works, which churches are based in Toontown, and how crooked toons launder their money. I was particularly intrigued by the calm and serious toons in the Sanatorium - apparently, if you're not loud and goofy and bouncing off the walls, you're considered insane, which is the opposite of how humans think about mental health.

The blonde humanoid toon on the cover is Caitlyn "Honey" Graham, Willy's girlfriend. I really like Honey. In fact, she might be my favourite of the novel-exclusive characters. Throughout the book, you're trying to work out if she's a good bad girl or a bad good girl, or if she's really just a bad bad girl. If Who Framed Roger Rabbit ever gets a sequel or prequel or spin-off cartoon series, I'd love to see Honey on screen.

What I Disliked: The Roger we meet in this novel is a bit too stupid for my liking. In Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Roger made seemingly nonsensical choices, but he had his own (cartoon) logic to explain his actions, and he was even proved right in his assumptions a few times. So I much prefer to think of Roger as the kind of toon where you're never quite sure if he's truly dumb or merely playing dumb for the sake of a gag. Here, he's just straight-up dumb, and that's not as fun to read about.

Verdict: This was the book I knew the least about before I read it, so I was more cautious going in - but it ended up being my second favourite of the Roger Rabbit novels. I enjoyed learning more about Toontown and its residents. My favourite parts of the film had been the toony parts - Roger, and Jessica, and Roger and Jessica together - so I guess it makes sense that I'd enjoy the novel that takes place almost entirely in Toontown.

Jessica Rabbit: XERIOUS Business

The Plot: It's the 2020s, sometime post-pandemic, and Jessica Krupnik is a human in a toon-less world. She's working a dead-end job in a crime-ridden part of town, her stepmother bosses her around and belittles her, her stepsisters treat her like a servant, and her stepbrothers sexually harass her. She's basically a modern-day Cinderella. But instead of a fairy godmother, Jessica is rescued from her life of drudgery by an opportunity to apply for a role at XERIOUS, a crime-fighting organisation of secret agents. She gets the job, and is later put on a mission with Robbe, one of XERIOUS's most experienced agents, to catch a criminal mastermind called the Klown.

(And this is somehow a prequel to Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Despite being set decades after that film. And starring a human Jessica instead of a toon Jessica. Cartoon timelines be weird, y'all.)

What I Liked: This was the most fun novel to read! I think that's because it was a spy novel spoof, rather than a gritty noir detective story. The other three novels could be quite dour in tone - yes, cases would get solved, but people would get hurt in the process, and relationships would be irrevocably altered, so there was always this undercurrent of sadness in the seemingly happy endings. After three novels in a row of that, a story spoofing spy novels was always going to feel like a breath of fresh air. Gary K. Wolf has stated that he wrote this book in lockdown and had a lot of fun doing so, and I feel that coming across in his writing.

Robbe was another great novel-exclusive character. I can't say too much about him, because that would massively spoil things, but I can say that I enjoyed witnessing his development over the course of the novel. To give the most spoiler-free explanation I can, Robbe starts out as a suave and competent spy, but also a misogynist - until something happens to him in the line of duty that shakes his confidence. Watching him grow and try to be a better person, especially towards Jessica, while also dealing with the aftermath of his accident, was truly engaging. It even got me thinking about the portrayal of disability in fiction, which I did not expect a Roger Rabbit novel to do.

What I Disliked: For a novel called Jessica Rabbit: XERIOUS Business, Jessica herself was disappointingly under-developed. The first three chapters follow her miserable life and her desire for adventure, for respect, for something more. And then there's a two-year time skip and whoop, she's suddenly a confident and glamorous secret agent! And she's ditched her glasses and dyed her hair, so she's beautiful now! And she achieved her impossible hourglass figure with nothing but diet and exercise, despite being a human and not a toon! Sigh.

There was a real missed opportunity here. Robbe already has a plot where he starts off skilled and arrogant, but then has his worldview challenged and needs to learn to embrace vulnerability. So we could have had Jessica experiencing her own story of growth alongside him, but in reverse! We could have watched as, over the course of the novel, she transforms from the beaten-down self-conscious little girl into the sensational woman she was always meant to be. Robbe would start on top and fall down; Jessica would start at the bottom and claw her way up. The parallels could have been awesome!

Gary K. Wolf has admitted that, as a man, he would struggle to write a novel about women, and it shows. The sexism Jessica experiences doesn't have any nuance; the story just says, "Harassment is bad" over and over again. There's one moment where the Klown is sharing his nefarious plan to change the world, and Jessica responds, "I like the current world." And ... huh? You like the sexual harassment you receive on an almost daily basis? You like the system that trapped you in a dead-end job? You like all the poverty and crime and misery the world has right now? The story could have really benefitted from a feminist and/or intersectional analysis.

Also, in an effort to make Jessica seem smart, the men around her are extremely stupid, unable to see through the Klown's flimsy disguises. That is ... not the best way to make your female characters appear intelligent.

Verdict: My favourite of the Roger Rabbit novels! It's not perfect, but my criticisms are born out of love and a desire to see this concept reach its full potential. But even as it is, I still found this book a lot of fun to read, and I can excuse a few flaws if I'm having fun.

Final Ranking (Compared to Other Roger Rabbit Media)

Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Roger Rabbit and Roger Rabbit's Toontown comics

The three shorts

Jessica Rabbit: XERIOUS Business

Who Wacked Roger Rabbit?

Who Censored Roger Rabbit?

Who P-P-P-Plugged Roger Rabbit?

[bucketspammer4life]

how i think the boxers were like in their teen years

was resting bc im sick but punchy men cant wait

Glass joe - was wayy more optimistic and cheery, knew how to cheer himself up, also dyed his hair blonde & lightened it pretty often so his hair was crusty and broke like glass (pun very intended )and hated his childhood photos, used to make fun of people who wear turtleneck sweaters but that didnt age well, looks back at his teen years with sadness

Von Kaiser - was very stern & cold, had a very shitty mustache and a bowl cut, wore actual boxing shorts before his overalls, had very oversized boots that he still wears today because he grew into them, shrieks in embarrasment anytime someone pulls up his teenage photos

Disco Kid - actually used to be a dancing coach and primarily did boxercise, once he started boxing he dropped boxercise and went all out on boxing, used to grow out his hair but cut if off since it distracted him, had his natural hair color, looks back at his teen years with nostalgia (and regret since he cant really cut back on the hair dye now, got into it because of joe)

King Hippo - was actually very tiny, Just shot up in height someday during his teen years, also had a light er voice and a crown that was wayy too big for him, it was passed down from his dad so he still has it & loves it with his entire heart, his boxing shorts still fell down a lot though, looks back at his teen years with joy since he thinks he used to look adorable

Piston Hondo - had longer hair and used to strut his shit, was more of a dickwad, had a belt and did less meditation, mellowed out pretty well since he used to go nuts in the ring flying from place to place, rolls his eyes anytime someone brings up his teen years

Bear Hugger - had a baby face and couldnt really grow a beard, so he had his cheeks pinched very often, used to be happy and still is happy, also met mrs bear's mom at this age during a foraging trip, looks back at his teen photos very happily, if he could go back in time he would pinch his teen-selves cheeks

Great Tiger - his magic sucked ass, his clones were distorted, kept flickering in & out of reality and couldnt stay more than a few seconds, didnt have his mustache & had a buzzcut so he looks back at his photos with anger because of his shitty hair when he didnt have his turban

Don Flamenco - wasnt balding & had longer hair that was wavy, used to be smaller so he was underestimated a lot, had just started bullfighting on the side, looks back at his teen years with sadness, mainly for his hair and lack of anger

Aran Ryan - OHOHHOHH this man wins the award for the worst teenage photos, he had a skaterboy era and the worst hair ever, had a very shitty beard that was growing only on one side, anytime someone pulls those pictures up he runs away

Soda Popinski - Literally unrecognizable, had light brown hair & a buzzcut, didnt drink much soda except for rough matches and was built like a twig, once he started upping the amp on the soda his hair fell out a bit and he got ripped, looks back at his teen photos and laughs at his buzzcut

Bald Bull - oh you think the current bull is scary? You should have seen him then!! He had curly hair and was small but a lot faster, he also headbutted people a lot more but stopped because of health issues, his hair fell out from anger & ripping them out from stress, looks back at his teen years with nostalgia because he missed having hair

Super Macho Man - Literally your average surfer dude, went for the dilfbaiting when he turned 29, dressed like a fratboy and had blonde hair + used spray tans, looks back at his photos and calls himself "gnarly"

Mr Sandman - was wayy tinier except for his arms and used to have glasses, he switched to contacts after having his 19th pair broken, likes making fun of his old photos, also had braces so he was the 🤓 emoji irl for a while

[ranahan]

Agent nouns in Mando’a

No, not the 007 kind. I mean different ways to derive words for a “doer” in Mando’a. There are half a dozen different ones. I’ve included some examples, but not an exhaustive list of all the instances these suffixes/derivations appear in the canon dictionary.

In no particular order (because tumblr on mobile doesn’t allow me to drag these into a more logical order):

-ad

As a noun, ad means “a child”. It’s kind of hard to say whether it should be analysed as a suffix or as a part of a compound word in derived words. Whichever way, in derived words the meaning is “person”, somewhat like “man” in English words like foreman, fireman, Englishman, etc. In demonyms, it’s perhaps best translated as “a child of…”. It also appears in other types of nouns and some adjectives, but that’s a story for another time.

In canon, it appears in words such as:

Alor’ad, (n.) ‘captain’ < alor (‘leader’) + ad

Ramikad, ‘commando’ < ram’ika ‘raid’ + ad, “raider”.

Kyramud, ‘assassin’ < kyram (‘death’) + ad (ad dissimilates to -ud)

Mando’ad, (n.) ‘a Mandalorian’, “child of Mandalore” < mando (‘mandalorian’) + ad

+1 non-canon example, since I promised to explain my reasoning for deriving the word for a pilot from sen (‘fly’) + ad > senad (rather than one of the other suffixes): it’s not that I think -ad is the only one or even the most common way to derive a noun for a profession—rather, it’s my observation that pilots seem to hold flying as something that’s more than just a job, and more like a part of their identity. And I wanted the word for a pilot to reflect that. So this one is for all the pilots in my family tree.

-ur

Nominal suffix which seems to denote a doer or an instrument (we also get it in gaanur, ‘hand tool’ < gaan (‘hand’) + ur).

Baar’ur, (n.) ‘a medic’ < baar (‘body’) + ur. My take on this word is that it’s rather like English “physician”, which derives (via French and Latin) from Ancient Greek φυσικός, which means ‘natural’ or ‘physical’. I tend to think that baar’la also means ‘bodily, corporal’ (I’m hardly original in this, my dictionary file lists no less that four authors for baar’la).

Cabur, ‘protector, guardian’ < *cab- (‘protect’) + ur

-ii

A nominal suffix denoting a doer, also used in demonyms (but not professional titles, at least not in the small canon sample). My take on -ii is a neutral agent suffix, much like English -er. It also appears in demonyms, which I’ve written about in here. The tldr is that I think it’s a neutral suffix—but it can be derogatory depending on the context.

Parjii, ‘victor, winner’ < *parj- (‘win’) + -ii

Aruetii, ‘outsider’

Kaminii, ‘Kaminoan’ < Kamino + -ii

-aar

Short. Punchy. I don’t know what else to say.

Chakaar, ‘thief’ < *chak- (‘steal’) + -aar, “stealer, robber”.

Senaar, ‘a bird’ < *sen- (‘fly’) + -aar, “flyer”.

Galaar, ‘a hawk’ < *gal- (‘plunge, plummet, dive’) + -aar. Literally “plummet-er” or “diver”, after its characteristic way of hunting.

-an

This is a fun one. As an independent word, it means ‘all’. As a suffix, it has a couple of different collective senses. When forming an agent noun, the best way I can formulate the meaning is X-an > “one who can all X”.

So cuyan < cuyir (‘to be, exist’) + an is not just any kind of a exister or liver, it’s one who lived through it all, i.e. a survivor.

And a goran < *gorar or possibly *gor + an, is not just any maker or creator, but one who can make everything (or everything that counts, anyway), i.e. a smith, an armourer.

Aran, ‘guard’ < *ar- (my best damn guess is this root means ‘against’) + an, so “one who can (stand) against everything”, probably.

Compound words

I’m still working out the compound word rules in Mando’a so take this analysis with a big heaping of salt. Most compound word titles/agent nouns seem to be a combination of a verb and a noun (like English “woodcutter”) and they don’t need a suffix in addition (“woodcut” rather than “woodcutter”).

First we have a couple of N + V (without the verbal suffix) type compounds. This compound noun type is really common in Mando’a in general.

Gotabor, ‘engineer’ < gota (‘machine’) + bor(ar) (‘work’), “machine-worker”.

Meshurkaan, ‘jeweler’ < meshurok (‘gemstone’) + hokaan(ir) (‘cut’), “gem-cutter”.

The V + N compound word type seems equally well attested:

Tay’haai, ‘archivist, reporter’ < *tay- (‘hold, preserve’) + *haai (probably ‘’), either “hold-truth” or “hold-see(ing, maybe?)”. The problem is, we don’t have a definition for haai. There’s haa’it (‘vision’) and haa’taylir (‘to see’), but no haai. The -i is a noun suffix, so that makes me tentatively place that as a noun.

Al’verde, ‘commander’ < *al- (‘lead’) + verde (‘soldiers’), “soldier-leader” or “lead soldiers”.

Demagol, ‘’ < dem(ar) (‘carve’) + agol (‘flesh’), “flesh-carver” or “carve flesh”.

Others

Sometimes what looks like a verbal suffix -Vr is actually a noun. There are enough of these in the dictionary that it’s either not just zero derivation or it’s a really common one (especially -ar).

Alor, ‘leader’ < *al- (‘lead’) + or

Hibir, ‘student’

Mirci’t, ‘prisoner’. Honestly, this one has a noun suffix that’s otherwise exclusively applied to things, not people. Proceed with caution if you want to take it as an example.

This is my (not exhaustive) analysis based on Traviss’ word list and other works, but I am of course not Karen Traviss and neither do I have access to her notes. If you disagree on something, let me know in the comments or even better, post your own analysis as a rebuttal.

[slacktastic]

SONG OF THE DAY: “I Can Only Be Myself”

Ahh the first single. 

I don’t even know what constitutes a good single anymore. Things have changed radically in the music business since I started making records. And let’s be honest, it’s not like I ever had much interest or knowledge of the biz anyway, much less any successful singles. I just know what stimulates my own little music brain. I’ve never been good at “trendy”, and I’ve never really cared.

But this seems like a pretty sensible choice for an introduction. It’s got a lot of ear candy for ya, and some snark too. And hey, it’s actually got a chorus, unlike some of my other songs. 

It’s a defiant little number, isn't it? I guess we all feel like that sometimes…when you get fed up trying to please someone else…being forced to go against your instincts for someone else’s agenda. Eventually you feel the need to reclaim your own identity. That’s what the song means to me, just a planting of the proverbial foot, and the refusal to fit into a tiny, constricted box. I guess it’s as appropriate a song as ever to kickstart my own solo career again after such a lengthy hibernation.

I remember writing it fairly quickly - but in two separate sittings, a year or so apart. There had been an incident in my life where I was really frustrated after an argument with a friend, and I literally said the words out loud - “I can only be myself.” 

And so I found myself a few days later, sitting in a cabin in the woods with an acoustic guitar, playing that little bass riff that slinks its way through the verses, before opening up to the big washy open chords that signal the chorus. I quickly came up with “I can only be myself, I don’t care what you want,” but had nothing else. I knew it was a good hook, so I recorded a quick voice memo and set it aside. I got distracted, but finally came back to it…a year later. 

And when I came back to it, I immediately found that little descending and ascending back up baroque pattern that opens the song. That was all the spark I needed to finish the song in one sitting, in about ten minutes. Done. I was in a completely different headspace that day, but I was still able to recall the angsty mood that had inspired the initial hook, and I channeled that defiance into the final lyric.

As always with my solo projects, I played all the instruments. Tracking it was pretty fun…I did the whole thing at my home studio, layering everything to a metronome individually. It was based around the gentle fingerpicked acoustic guitar part that spawned the song, which is an odd juxtaposition to the heavy full-band sound of the final mix. I used a Jazzmaster to rake those bright, slashing chords and the pointed angular stabs, but the layered slide solos were all done with my Gibson SG. 

I love the swirly, meandering organ lines, and the percussive Wurlitzer electric piano that drives, matching the acoustic pattern almost perfectly. But the real star of the song (in my humble opinion) is the punchy Rickenbacker bass line, played super staccato with a heavy pick. Like I said, lots of ear candy there.

After realizing that I didn’t get a very good drum sound at my own studio, I took the track over to my buddy Tom’s place, and recorded the final drum take there, with me playing on his old Rogers kit.

As for my vocals…well, they’re my vocals. I can only be…idiosyncratic. I’m like so many of you out there, in that I hate the sound of my own voice…alas, it’s all I’ve got. Y’all know I love stacking harmonies, but I kept them to a minimum here, just a low octave matching the lead vocal for most of the song, but with a short, glorious cluster of Queen stacks at the very end. 

Anyway…that’s the song…hope you like it. I’ll post more of these “song of the day” things as the release date for Across The Milky Way draws near.

As always, thanks for listening,

CH

4-8-25