#so i figured ummmm why not try posting things on the Internet

[eastbluecrewed]

taps microphone. hi i like them

[smolwritingchick]

Just Another Smol Preview :)

Author's Note: Literally a smol preview of the beginning of the MAMA Awards 2016 chapter. Always brainstorming and switching it up so the final product may vary.

I have been thinking a lot of this idea that I have for the MAMA Awards chapter and I'm excited to write about it and see it come to life.

Like I addressed before after MAMA Awards 2016 in the story, this should be the last time I write about Hyuna. This idea came up recently and I rolled with it. I also find myself getting this chapter done faster than anticipated so I am aiming to try to get it out in June and not later than that along with the 3rd Muster chapter. Hopefully not late June.

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'BREAKING! MAMA 2016 Collaboration with Cube's Hyuna and Big Hit's Jennie scrapped!'

Jennie frowned at the article as she sat by her desk in the Smartie Factory. It was crazy how things abruptly changed. Lately, Jennie and Hyuna weren't on speaking terms and issues have been occurring for a while.

It all started with the sneak dissing that Jennie had found out on her Tumblr. She loved scrolling through the tag of her name and came across a fairly popular post regarding Hyuna attending a few variety shows and interviews.

Statements such as, "Unlike the others, I don't need to repeatedly say I'm the best from head to toe. You already see it," which ARMY thought about Jennie's War of Hormone lyrics.

"Some rookies can be a bit much and try to overshine a veteran,"

"Some girls in this industry are a bit too fragile. I don't need to call myself bulletproof,"

"You mean the original version of How's This,"

Were just a handful of statements and ARMY immediately speculated she was throwing shade at Jennie.

'Uhhhh did Hyuna just sneak diss, Jennie? Am I freaking out over nothing? That bulletproof and glass line was SUS,' one comment said.

ARMY went on to do more research and they immediately figured out that there was some sort of animosity in Hyuna's words and it caused confusion in the fandom.

"The hell...?" Miss Bangtan murmured as she read about it and even saw her and Hyuna trending on Twitter.

Her stomach dropped and she felt hurt by the words. It confused her as to why she would say these things. Deciding to go straight to the source, she messaged Hyuna on KakaoTalk.

Jen: Ummmm what's going on sis? We got a problem or something? If so let's address it now. Call me when you're free

But hours later, still no reply. What officially solidified the fact there was an issue going on was when Jennie facetimed Hayoon about it.

"I'm trying to contact her so we can settle this shit now instead of over the internet. But I haven't gotten a response. I don't know how this happened. I didn't even do anything. I know we haven't talked in a while, but damn,"

And that was when Hayoon informed her what was going on from what she heard. She and other people have been overhearing her talking about how upset she was that she would be sharing the stage with Jennie for How's This. She wanted to perform it alone and on top of that felt bothered by the fact that the duet music video with Jennie started to get way more views than the original video.

"I mean it got more views because ARMY loves to support every member of Bangtan. They were bound to have the views boost," Jennie exclaimed on Facetime while Hayoon nodded. "That's one of the amazing things about them. They watched that video for me and I'm grateful but damn, is it that deep? So, she doesn't want to share the stage with me and is feeling some type of the way that her original music video didn't have that many views? Ma'am, if that was a problem, instead of throwing shots, why not talk to me face to face and express yourself? All this childishness for what?"

"I know. It's ridiculous," Hayoon said with a frown. "I had to distance myself from her. I didn't like the things she was saying. And I even talked to her about it but she blew me off and said she didn't care,"

Jennie sighed and shook her head. "Annoying...thanks for telling me...wow...the switch up is crazy...I just don't understand,"

"Of course. Still no reply?"

Jennie went to check back on the app and scoffed. "Did this bitch block me?!"

"What?! No way!"

"Wowwww. So, it's like that? Okay. I can't even contact her anymore...this is making me start to have trust issues a little bit. Like we were so close and would hang out and talk often and I trusted her with a lot of shit...I hope she doesn't spill anything personal. Because now I'm thinking about my relationship,"

"As much as I dislike her attitude, I don't think she'll spill anything especially when she is dating E'Dawn privately,"

"Yeah...I'm not going to air her dirty laundry and talk about how she got a rookie boyfriend and shit. That's unfair to E'dawn and his future career as an idol,"

"Agreed. No need to get him involved. I believe she won't involve Jungkook as well, so no need to worry,"

Jennie sighed. "When I see her at one of these award shows I'll confront her. This is ridiculous,"

"Some kind of girl's girl she is. So close to award season, too? She should not be trying to paint you as this bad person,"

"Yeah...I just don't know how long it's going to take for the public to understand how grimy she is,"

As the news of her performance with Hyuna wasn't happening anymore, Cube Entertainment and even Mnet made the excuse that they felt like Jennie was not ready to perform with Hyuna and was a bit difficult to work with. Which was a load of bull and lots of fans saw through the BS. However, Big Hit responded in defense to her saying that she was ready, she was very easy to work with and it was their loss on the collaboration.

It warmed her heart to see the company come to her defense and say she would prove doubters wrong on BTS' stage at the MAMA Awards. Hearing the news that the collaboration was scrapped made her feel down since she had been so excited to perform with someone she looked up to for many years. G-Dragon's words still rang through her mind that not everyone is your friend in the industry and the switch ups be crazy.

Now back to reality, Jennie continued to sit by her desk, deep in thought about the situation. All she wanted to do was speak to her like an adult and squash whatever issue she had with her. But with her being blocked, it was clear she wanted nothing to do with Jennie.

It had been days since the first set of disses, along with lyric changes to throw shots at her and the lack of response from Jennie had everyone talking.

People commented:

'Unbothered. I like that,'

'Hyuna cooked you!'

'Everything she said about Jennie was true,'

'Rookie! Hyuna is better than you!'

'So, are you going to respond to HyunA?'

'Damn, still no response?'

'Jennie is known for her impressive stage presence at MAMA. They could have been a powerful duo if egos didn't get in the way. Something ain't right,'

'LOL Hyuna won by default. She is taking forever to respond. Is she scared?'

'Get in the booth, Jennie. Or are you taking the L?'

'So, you just gonna let her talk shit about you like that?'

'Jennie doesn't have to respond to anything.'

'I hate how you guys are instigating this drama.'

'No response is a response, Jennie!'

'Does Miss Bangtan need her bulletproof boy scouts to help her with this one?'

'I bet Jennie is the problem. Because she and Hyuna were great friends and she must have done something wrong...'

'Time to stop hiding behind your boys, woman up and respond to your senior.'

'Respect queen Hyuna!'

'You should be lucky she even asked you to collaborate.'

'ARMY gets on my nerves. They like to spam and stream everything for bragging rights. That music video didn't deserve to get higher views than the OG!'

'Yikes...going after one of the chillest people in the K-Pop industry is not wise because if Jennie responds I bet not hear shit that she was disrespectful when Hyuna started this first. And don't try to say respect your seniors.'

'Y'all are a little too comfortable being rude to Jennie on her page...'

'Hyuna started it and Jen will finish it. Watch!'

'Hyuna is being a bit too bold running her mouth.'

'Of all people when you have Bangtan backing her? And other idols who are close friends with her? I don't understand the logic.'

'Hyuna is untouchable in the industry, no idols will come to her aid,'

'I doubt any idol will defend Jennie from Hyuna. She should handle this herself.'

'Bangtan shouldn't always have to fight her battles. She should handle this by herself,'

'Jennie handles business. She'll respond,'

Still, on social media, she saw herself getting tagged in a lot of Hyuna stuff. Come to find out she was still sneak dissing and her stans were eating it up and defending her. However, ARMY was not too happy about the abrupt attitude change and shade thrown at Miss Bangtan.

"Do you want me to say something?" Yoongi asked, who sat next to her, ready to defend her honor.

"Yoongi...no," she firmly said as she turned to him.

"The situation is so grimy. Like damn, the bitch can't share the stage with you on her song that she wanted you to be on in the first place? Why bother asking to collab?" Angelina spoke up, sitting on the couch with Namjoon. "Did she think it wasn't going to go well? She underestimated the power of ARMY's support and your talent as an artist. Those comments on that YouTube video were mainly about you, Jennie. You outshined her in the music video and she was mad about it and has been holding it in for a while. The bitch is jealous,"

"I'm just confused and thrown off by everything. Like I thought we were friends—"

"Well, she's not your friend," Angelina firmly cut Jennie off, getting upset about Hyuna. "A friend doesn't sneak diss. Fuck her,"

"Are you going to let her just bash your name like this in public?" Namjoon asked.

"She is South Korea's IT girl. Everyone loves her. And if I respond...I have a feeling I'll be public enemy number one. You know how the media is gonna twist this and make me the bad guy," Jennie reminded.

"Jen, I love your calmness, right now because you know I'll be ready to fight somebody," Angelina added. "I wish I had your calmness. But stop being nice,"

"I'm not trying to be! I'm not! I'm getting annoyed, now..." she sighed out of frustration.

"Good. Write about it,"

"Listen, I shouldn't cause Bangtan any drama. Award season is coming up...I can't be taking the attention off of us at the award shows. Like I don't even want to be involved in this drama...why can't I just have some genuine celebrity friends, that won't get mad over petty shit, like this? I'm getting PTSD from Hailey and that took a while to heal from,"

"Munchkin, you're not causing drama for us," Hobi spoke up as he leaned against the wall, next to the couch. "I know you're thinking of the negatives but the positives outweigh it. You should respond,"

"And you know that people love you, too. She is not the only beloved K-Pop idol, in the world. You've been making a positive name for yourself with us as BTS. ARMY and us will not stand for the slander. I want you to write about it all," Yoongi affirmed.

"Turn this negative into a positive," Namjoon reminded.

"Diss track incoming?" Angelina smiled.

Jennie let the rappers' words sink in as she glanced at all of them. They had a point. She couldn't just let her bash her name like this out of nowhere. On top of that, she didn't want to hear anything about being respectful to her seniors when she was getting disrespected unprovoked. It bothered her how people think they can talk to younger people in any type of way. Respect should be a mutual thing.

"For now, don't bother engaging in the drama on social media. Don't respond to any of it online. Continue to go about your day like normal," Namjoon suggested.

"Yeah...okay. You're right. All of you," she replied. "I really can't let her just get away with talking shit and not saying it directly to my face. Especially when she didn't even want to respond to my messages and blocked me. She needs to get checked,"

"Good. I'm looking forward to this," Hobi smiled.

"You and I both," Yoongi revealed his gummy smile.

Jennie chuckled and turned to Namjoon. "This reminds me a little bit of the Bobby situation and your diss at MAMA 2014. But yours was more of entertainment. Unlike this,"

The leader chuckled at that and nodded. "Yeah. Well, what are you going to do, now?"

"Handle it," she firmly responded and grabbed her notebook.

"Best news I've heard all day. Get writing," Angelina broke out into a big smile, as the others agreed.

"Mama Awards 2016. Speak your truth, there. Let's talk to the staff later about everything," Namjoon recommended.

"Okay," Jennie nodded, liking that idea. "I'll show you what I have when I'm done. Can I be alone, please? To work?"

The boys respected her decision and left her to work while Angelina stayed behind with Namjoon waiting for her outside the studio.

"Word of advice? Try the 8 Mile method. The stealing thunder strategy. You remember the movie and the final rap battle with Eminem?" Angelina asked as she got off the couch.

"Yeah. I've watched it a few times. That's not a bad idea. I'll work on it,"

[lonespektr]

Alright

They/Them

Obvs I ADORE the title

Off to a great start thus far tbh , first 15mins 33% squishy tomatoes score i guess heard lots of yikes from everyone sight unseen

Mostly because like umm traumatic which is frankly exhausting whenever a film deals with something awful there's a damn debate about it

Horror doesn't mean fake, real life things are horrific.

That's the point.

I will say what i always say, with these types of films is that people tend to focus on the victim and i wound ask people to consider looking at the perpetrator and that's what makes horror the perfect medium for actual real things because horror is about looking at the monster

Going to see the scary monster

And it's helpful to depict things that in real life would be considered something other than what it actually fucking is: monstrous - to depict them as they are

Consider that conversion therapy is largely talked about in the main stream media as a "controversial therapy that could lead to negative outcomes"

Instead of just what it actually is -monstrous

I did see one bad review that was actually after someone saw the film. I skimmed it cause I didn't want spoilers

Soon as I saw the trailer I figured this has the potential to be really good or really bad but gotta see on ambition points for the title alone

Plus red (no longer) from CLAWS

Also have a theory 🤔

Modern remodel for that cabin

Cleared the first hurdle

There's plenty of queers who say i don't want to sit through that shit (same goes for any film)

Pink anthem (here for it)

Honestly musical number was well done the camp setting, no one overly good a singing. Random dancing Not forcibly coordinated/ just a black person juke boxing to start us off (naturally) and everybody jumping in primarily because there's no internet so there's fuck else to do only improvements could be made is if some words were forgotten

Ummmm? Okay we are in a definitive direction now and i don't know that it's a good one

Just got a concrete slap on the wrist there

They dropped the science line

Whoa how tall is that one

"domesticity"

Classic meat hooks

the "hunted" is early maybe twice

Why show your hand though? (I man for the audience but)

Dude are those even live rounds, those'r bee bee guns right

Can't get off the interracial requires one white

Lol Jason totes has a last name huh? What you trying to summon him with sex

Bad general film trope with the post violation intimacy, it doesn't work even with horny YA

That was fucking hilarious actually

Deffo two scenes now and the people involved in the scenes never

Lobotomy drop

1 to 5 real quick

To be clear no one had that smoke for American Horror Story, that had maybe two episodes where they did exactly this

The in scene joke was much better in that it was a homosexual treating a bisexual with lobotomy

The ending is corny and predictable but by no means

The writing is a bit stiff at the end

The best parts of this is the guise of respectability had they leaned further into faux science/therapy with low key religiosity would have been better

Could have left it until the credits

Okay mediocre slasher / that's literally it nothing to write home about

The very basic and necessary premise that conversion camps are real life horror movie shit dats it

[thr-333]

Drastic Measures- Part 2

@daminette-december2019-2020

~Swordplay~

To summarise: I will have the love square one way or another!

Ao3

First >Next 

--------------

As far as homes go it’s pretty good” Adrien stretches out, Plagg curls up next to him.

“Don't get too comfortable we’re going to be on the move,” Marinette types furiously at her computer.

“I will try my hardest,” Adrien stares blankly at her, sat atop a pile of grubby blankets next to a broken window. Marinette loses connection to her computer and slams it shut with a huff.

“Get some sleep I’m going to find an internet cafe,” Marinette stuffs the cheap laptop into her bag, amazing how something she bought at a hole in the wall place for thirty bucks didn’t work well.

“Who needs sleep when you can have coffee,” Adrian stands up, ready to follow her.

“Sleep Chat,” She pushes him down by the shoulders, “I need my partner fully operational,”

“Yeah kid, take a break, we worked hard,” Plagg yawns, turning over.

“You also worked hard Bug,” Adrien lets himself be pushed back onto the blankets.

“I won't be able to sleep until I know how everything is in Paris,”

“Neither can I,” Adrien protests, already half asleep.

“Sure you can, night Chat,”

“Night M’lady,”

Marinette leaves the same way they came in, though the window. She has to slide down the gutter to get on the street, Tikki hiding away in her bag. She has to go pretty far in town to find a suitable cafe, too far from Adrien to be comfortable. Marinette pops in her earbuds before opening her computer to let her talk to Tikki freely.

She doesn't immediately search up missing person cases. Looking instead at Paris tourist destinations and guides. Switching to the dangers of traveling to Paris; the only mention of Akuma being on obscure question and answer sites. She looks at kidnapping potential and then moves onto missing person cases. Adrien's is the first to come up, obviously. 

There was lots of outcry among his fans. Many were throwing around accusations of foul play on Gabriel's part from abuse to locking Adrien away from the world. However, Gabriel was also fiercely looking for his son. Adrien hadn’t left behind any sort of note. Well only to Nino, which Adrien had told Marinette was asked not to mention to anyone.

Marinette then feels safe enough to look up her own case. It was smaller, although was gaining attention as Jagged proclaimed it to high heavens; more so asking what they did wrong and how they could fix it and asking for any sightings of her. That could be a problem if her picture was already around. Marinette pulls her hood up higher. They might have to get haircuts and wear disguises… on second thought wearing suspicious disguises in Gotham might cause more problems.

“Tikki they seem really worried,” Marinette watches the videos Jagged posted, her parents in the background running around talking with police.

“Of course they are Mari,” Marinette feels a light tap on her side, “But you're doing the right thing,”

“No I’m not,” not when she’s watching a video of her parents crying,  “I’m doing what needs to be done, this is my responsibility, no matter what a certain someone thinks,”

She spits with venom. Maybe Adriens rant last night rubbed off on her.

“He’s the hero here,” Tiki says non accusingly, “Imagine if another hero came to Paris without asking you… remember Volpina?”

“Ah now that was an actual villain,” Marinette hadn’t trusted her from the start,  “Plus she was akumatized,”

“Marinette,” Marinette can’t bring herself to feel guilty, even under tikis scolding.

“Right but that still doesn't give him the right,” Marinette huffs, “After all would he attack Marinette? No!”

“Are you implying you would attack Lila?”

“......... no,”

“Marinette,”

Marinetti smirks to herself instinctively looking around for Adrien to share her joke. Then Marinette froze. The cafe was empty, not even a barista. How had she not noticed!?

“Wait,” Marinetti says out loud before Tiki could talk, “I’m going to have to call you back, something just came up,”

Something was watching her from the kitchen door as if she couldn’t see them. Marinette tries to act normal going for the pepper on the table and putting it on her food. They move at the same time. The attacker runs towards her, Marinette throws the shaker at- Robin?! It hits him square in the forehead, with a curse he touches his bleeding forehead.

“I am so sorry!” Marinette panics, “That was meant to explode in your face!”

“How is that better?!” Robin runs forward, sword drawn. Marinette ducks behind the table grabbing her plate and frisbeeing it towards him, he manages to dodge this one, “Draw your weapon coward!"

“I don’t have a weapon!” She grabs the table cloth ready to take the vigilante down, “What is wrong with you?!”

He doesn't answer lunging at her again with the sword. Marinette kicks up the table then kicks it towards him in one swift movement. With the impact of the table he drops the sword, Marinette jumps up landing on the table which pins Robin down to the ground with its weight and hers, with the legs sticking up.

“I knew it,” Robin spits and she presses her weight into the table to keep him pinned.

“Excuse you,” Marinette catches his wrist as he tries to pull a dagger on her using the table cloth to tie it to the legs of the table, then does the same with the other, “You attacked me,”

“-Robin!” she hears a faint call, no one is around so it must be from his communicator, “-Robin report back to the cave!”

“I’ll take that~” Marinette sings songs ignoring how he growls at her. She rolls her eyes stepping off the table she needed to get out of here now.

She steps out of the cafe throwing the communicator and likely a tracking device too on the roof of a passing car then sprints in the opposite direction. She heads for the alleys looking for an area with no cameras as she runs. When she finds a spot Marinette transforms running back to their base with record timing.

“Adrien wake up!” Ladybug jumps through the window, barely avoiding landing on him, “Batman’s after us,”

“What?!” He sits bolt upright, Ladybug pulls him onto his feet.

“Move! Now!” She grabs their bags, Adrien transforms and they take off over the rooftops.

“What happened?!” Chat shouts as the runaway, “Is Batman chasing us?”

“Yes, well kinda-- Robin tried to kill me,”

“He what?!”

“As Marinette,” She adds, slowing down as they should have put enough distance between them.

“Did they figure us out already?” Chat Noir slows down into a walk then collapses on the rooftop,

"Probably,"

“This is the worst wake up call ever!”

“Well, it's about to get worse,” Ladybug cringes feeling the distinct trace of magic she was all too familiar with.

“Akuma?”

“Akuma,”

“Great, perfect,” Chat complains standing back up.

“At least we’re not at school,” Ladybug shrugs, launching herself over a roof.

“No you’re right being chased by a masked vigilante is a massive improvement,”

---

Wow

“Robin! Get your head out of the clouds and get over here!”

Damian breaks out of his trance, regrettably tearing his gaze away from Ladybug to the much less awe inspiring sight of Batman trapped under a car. They shouldn’t be wasting their time worrying about these established amazing hero’s and worry about that assassin on the loose. Who knows who she was after. She could be planning Batman’s demise at this very moment; if she was close with his mother then surely she knew their identities which was far far more dangerous.

Ladybug could handle herself as evidence by her going toe to toe with the newest villain. In a matter of minutes, the villain was down for the count with no help on their part. 

“Ladybug!” He calls before she leaves again, maybe she could help him convince his father that he was being an absolute buffoon.

“Oh it’s you,” She says surprisingly coldly, “What do you want now?”

“Now?”

“Are, you here to attack me again?”

“... I didn’t attack you?” He had spent all morning tracking down a dangerous assassin.

“... Oh! Of course, you did- haha I just ummmm-- there must have been an… Akuma! Yes! There must have been an Akuma earlier that looked like you,”

“An Akuma was impersonating me?” Robin growls.

“Yeah, they do that sometimes,” Chat Noir pipes up, “It’s annoying,”

“Yes and if you’re here, that uh… that means the Akuma is still out there so we gotta go deal with that so-bye!” Ladybug swings off closely followed by Chat Nor; off to go save his name and reputation.

---

“So you really think that was an Akuma?” Adrien asks as they transform back.

“Maybe- I don’t know it was just an excuse so he wouldn't figure out my identity,”

“Well at least he doesn't know it,” Adrien shrugs as they walk through the alleys in search of a new place to rest that night.

“If he doesn't know then why would he attack Marinette?” She asks, “And if it was an Akuma that means Hawkmoth knows my identity which is so much worse!”

“Is it tho?”

“Chat,”

“I mean back in Paris it would have been bad,” They both cringe, “But here we have no home, no family, no friends! He cant use any of that against us now!”

Adrien beams his contagious smile.

“You always manage to find a bright side,” Marinette smirks punching him in the shoulder.

“So that's why,” They both turn around, staring in shock.

“Batman?!” Turning back their way out is already blocked by mister boy wonder. Who, by the way he is glaring at her, was not an Akuma this morning.

“I can't believe Talia called me because some teenagers were eloping,”

I know that name- WAIT!

“Eloping?!” Marinette chokes, “We are not eloping!”

“As in not at all,” Adrien blanches, “And I mean no offense Marinette you are literally the sweetest person but I can’t imagine anything more horrific!”

“Oh god, same!” At least now, “I mean once when we were younger…-- it was a silly crush!”

“Wait you had a crush on me?!”

“Yeah, well, you had a crush on me!”

“... oh god… I did, didn’t I?!”

While Adrien is dealing with that little revelation Marinette looks around for an escape. There isn’t much opportunity since both have their eyes on them, partly out of morbid curiosity at their little freakout. Well if you don't have a distraction homemade is fine.

“AKUMA!” They both look, predictably. 

Marinette grabs Adrien and runs. She goes for the side Robins guarding, sweeping his legs sending him crashing to the ground.

“I’m not sorry!” Marinette calls as they sprint down the alley.

Marinette heads for the main street, enough of a crowd to camouflage. As they are walking through as casually as possible Marinette sweeps them both for bugs putting any she finds on random passerbys. They walk sometimes ducking into busy shops in hopes of losing their trail. They come across the mall which works perfectly for them. They stay until it starts to approach closing time, it’s easy enough to avoid security and so they get locked in for the night.

“So what do you want to do?!” They walk through the empty halls Adrien skipping along and looking at each display. Marinette stops outside an electronics store, the tv’s still on and displaying the news.

“Make a plan for a way to deal with that,” On-screen are the two of them, a video of Ladybug throwing a car at Batman, “This is taken completely out of context!”

“What’s the context?” 

“Batman was being a little bitch!”

“I’m sure that will hold up in court,” Adrien laughs taking a seat in one of those massage chairs, “Besides what's the problem?”

“The problem?!” Marinette yells, “The problem is that now all of Gotham is going to hate us!”

“So? Do we really need them to like us?” Adrien gets up to stand by her, rubbing her shoulder.

“They did in Paris,”

“We’re not in Paris anymore,” Adrien says quietly, leading her towards the seats, “We have a chance to start new again, everyday something we haven't done before, a couple of pals living day to day on the edge, isn’t that exciting?”

“I just--” want to go home, “I’m tired,”

“Take a break,” Adrien sits her down in the massage chair with a kind smile, “I’ll keep watch,”

“.. ok,” Marinette curls up in the chair Tikki coming to lie beside her. With not much strength to fight it, Marinette falls asleep while she can.

-------------------------

Taglist? nope don’t have one, horrible at keeping track of them sorry~

[keow]

What advice would you give to someone who grew up in an atheist household but feels a vague connection to God? My family wasn't for or against any religion so I grew up indifferent but also comforted by religious memorabilia, going in churches, etc. I know that sounds wishy-washy but I'd like to explore it more but I don't know where to start and what to read to learn more, to decide what I think.

There are probably better blogs you could ask about this than mine, but I'll try my best. I’m going to answer this under the cut because it got really lengthy hehe. Also sorry this took so long to answer, I've been pretty busy!

So firstly it seems like we had really similar experiences growing up. My mom was “spiritual” and agnostic, raising me without exposure to really any religion (besides maybe Buddhism and a little bit of nondenominational Christianity—she shopped around a bit). I think this sort of background is becoming more and more common in society, so you aren’t alone.

Because of this non-religious childhood I can also tell you firsthand that there are a lot of bad things out there. For basically the entirety of my adolescence I was involved in witchcraft, paganism, and “new age” spirituality. I’m just going to tell you straight up that this is bad news. Please don’t fall for any of their bullshit. I literally worshipped and communicated with demons for years and it turned me into a horrible, evil person. Don’t fall for the “law of attraction” bullshit either, no matter how seductive it seems.

With that out of the way…

I am still in the process of converting so I can’t give you the perspective of someone who has completed that process, but I can tell you what has helped me figure out a lot of things religion-wise.

Firstly, the most important thing is to ask questions. If you do not ask questions, you cannot learn. If you do not learn, you will never know truth. So ask questions.

You say you feel drawn to churches, so I’m going to operate on the assumption that you want to know more about Christianity. If this isn’t the case then… well… ummmm well I ummummumummm Uh.

You’ve probably heard “Jesus died for your sins” before, but it’s very easy to just gloss over that because the idea is kind of pushed around our society without anyone really explaining it. Like I had no clue what that meant or how it worked before I started asking these questions.

“What are the doctrinal differences between these two religions? What about between these two branches of the same religion?” “Why is this biblical event important?” “How does the Trinity work?” “How do we know Jesus is the Messiah?” Et cetera. Any question you can think of, find out the answer to it. Catholic Answers is a pretty good place to start!

Secondly, as you’re in this “research” phase, I highly suggest immersing yourself in media that deals with religion as a whole. I listened to a lot of catholic podcasts and watched a lot of YouTube videos that explained some very important theological concepts that I didn’t quite understand. It’s not a proper education by any means but it will help you get the basics down.

Ideally, you’d be able to ask someone about this in person and get proper responses (assuming the person is knowledgeable and can explain things well). Like seriously, you should do this. Online stuff is nice but it isn’t a replacement for finding a parish and talking to someone.

I couldn’t really do this because I didn’t have access at the time when I was really becoming curious (pandemic and stuck with anti-theist parents lol), so if you’re in a similar situation, the internet is your best friend. In that stage I also followed a lot of catholic and orthodox blogs so I would be surrounded with that content as much as possible. Kind of like how if you’re trying to learn a language you need to immerse yourself in it I guess?

In my pinned post I have a lot of resources that were useful to me linked near the bottom :)

I highly suggest getting a Bible or AT LEAST downloading a good Bible app. Multiple actually. Or listen to something like the Bible in a Year podcast by Fr. Mike Schmitz. I have a study Bible with a lot of footnotes which is GREAT if you love knowing about translations, original texts, and historical context, but not as great if you just want to read the story of salvation itself.

Now you can be the most knowledgeable person on a religion, knowing all the history and all the doctrine, but if you don’t have a relationship with God it means absolutely nothing. The most important thing is to pray. You can’t have a relationship with God if you do not pray. Ask for guidance, ask for assistance in becoming more virtuous, pray for others, just talk to God about anything.

Personally I bought myself a nice rosary once I started seriously considering Catholicism and started to pray using that, but there are countless ways to pray.

The ways that work best for me are lectio divina and the rosary. I can never seem to finish novenas, but those are also nice, and listening to hymns and chant helps me connect to God a lot! ALSO learning about church history and the various saints throughout it. Again, you might be different, so just find what works for you!

LASTLY.

IT’S NOT WEIRD AT ALL TO CONVERT AS AN ADULT!!!!! Speaking for Christianity, that is. For something like Judaism it would probably be a bit stranger, especially since Judaism is so heavily linked to a specific culture and ethnicity.

Christianity however is very open to adult converts. That’s how it got started in the first place. There are countless saints who converted later in life, so please please don’t feel weird about it. The Church is probably the most friendly to converts out of all religions. Here’s an article on the Catholic conversion process for adults!

TLDR:

Ask questions, learn, pray, learn some more, pray even more, go find an RCIA program so you can get catechized and baptized. LOVE YOU <3

[womenofcolor15]

‘Love is Blind’ Star Lauren Speed Wants Brown Girls To Know THIS About Finding Your Soul Mate (Exclusive)

TheYBF.com caught up with “Love Is Blind” stars Lauren Speed and Cameron Hamilton and - after binging this mostly foolywang material of a show - we love them even more. Find out the message Lauren has for brown girls about finding their soul mate and more inside…

SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t watched “Love Is Blind” yet, this post contains spoilers.

Is Love really Blind? Ask Mrs. Hamilton!

Lauren Speed and Cameron Hamilton (above, spreading their love all over NYC while doing press) quickly became fan favorites on everyone’s newest Netflix obsession, “Love Is Blind.” And y'all, we had to suffer through A LOT of foolishness from their castmates to watch their love story blossom. Still recovering from Jessica and Amber and everyone in between.

The series picked a group of men and women, put them in a house and let them go on “blind dates” to see if anyone could find true love based on an emotional connection. That’s right, they couldn’t see each other while “dating.” They would go into these cozy pods and build connections with one another by conversing through a wall. They never saw each other. Before the time was up, they had to decide if they wanted to get engaged with someone they connected with and then they would walk down the aisle weeks later to say, “I Do.”

We were on hand to watch the Weddings (the final episodes) with the cast in Atlanta, so we got to ask the pressing questions we needed to know after damn near throwing our wine and phone at the TV every other episode.

Yup, The Hamiltons (adorbs!) are still living happily ever after.  And thank God at least one couple made sense on this show.

While most of the couples didn’t last, there were two couples who actually tied the knot: Lauren Speed married Cameron Hamilton and Amber Pike married Matt Barnett (that last couple was and still is a DOOZY).

We can't lie, we were shocked to see Sex & Sephora Amber & Barnett tie the knot and still be together chile.

During the show, Lauren shared how Cameron was the first white man she had ever been with. Meanwhile, Cameron shared he was in a serious relationship for years with a black woman before Lauren, so he was well aware of the struggles an interracial couple would face.

On the show, Lauren said she wanted to be as authentic as possible – even down to her wearing her bonnet in the bed with him at night – because she really wanted to see if this “experiment” would work.

Well, it did for her (also because she's a WHOLE catch, and so is he). And now she’s dropping gems, specifically to brown girls like her, about finding your soul mate.

YBF correspondent Erena caught up with Mr. & Mrs. Hamilton during the series finale screening in Atlanta and here’s what she told us:

Take notes ladies.

        View this post on Instagram

                  Right before this experience, I was just at the point where I had given up on the fairytale. Feeling like we sell little girls these dreams of a Prince Charming that doesn’t really exist. Clearly God had the last laugh. I was open minded entering this experience honestly never expecting to fall in love and become the happiest I’ve ever been all while being recorded for the world to see. When I said Cameron looked like a Prince I meant it... he to me embodied everything I had dreamed of in my fairytale... Kind, smart, loving, selfless, brave could make me laugh and cry all in one conversation... but most importantly made me feel valued and loved. Of course like anything in life we are humans and not without struggle. But as you mature you learn that the struggles are what strengthen you and help you realize what needs more care. Im excited to continue this next chapter with you Mr. Hamilton. Us against the world. Bonnie and Clyde (minus the shoot up) #LoveIsBlind currently streaming on @Netflix @lajoyphotographyllc

A post shared by Lauren Speed (@need4lspeed) on Mar 2, 2020 at 3:30pm PST

  By the way, the Hamiltons have a YouTube Page coming down the pipeline soon:

        View this post on Instagram

                  Ummmm so we did a thing! @cameronreidhamilton and @need4lspeed got with me to take some amazing photos for their brand new YouTube Page! Yes you heard me right! They have a new YouTube page all about them! Subscribe to their new page and my page for updated videos and photos! Full video link in bio! . . Link in bio for the full video! . . . Photo: @lajoyphotographyllc Video: @iamteko Graphics: @thechloebrand . . . #lajoyphotography #loveisblind #loveisblindnetflix #laurenandcameron #atlphotographer #lifestylephotographer #lifestylephotoshoot #atlentrepreneurs #youtubers #girlceo #photography #netflix #weddingphotography #weddinginspiration #americascouple #laurenandcameron

A post shared by LAJOY COX | Photographer (@lajoyphotographyllc) on Mar 2, 2020 at 1:01pm PST

  "Love Is Blind" star Carlton Morton was also in the mix. He became a breakout star of the show after he waited until AFTER he proposed to Diamond to tell her he was a bisexual man. The timing was extrmeely off and his excuses about why he waited to tell the woman he claimed to wanted to spend his life with were, to put it mildly, trash. THEN, he had the audacity to demean and degrade her as she was explaining to him why she was upset that he waited to reveal something that's a huge part of who he is and being her potential partner. Needless to say, she dipped on his a** - while quoting Beyonce's "Don't Hurt Yourself" - and never looked back.

Now, he claims he's no longer doing press because no one has been supporting him:

        View this post on Instagram

                  Thanks for the 3 of y’all who supported me in this. I feel alone and don’t want any of this life anymore. I’m fighting ALONE. And it HURTS.

A post shared by Carlton Morton (@carltonmorton) on Mar 3, 2020 at 1:55pm PST

  Hmph.

During the screening, TheYBF.com also spoke with married couple Amber & Barnett and how they felt right before the wedding - especially when Amber thought Barnett didn't want to marry her. Formerly engaged couple Damian Powers & Giannina Gibelli (he called it off at the alter!) were also in attendance and they shared how they're moving forward.

Peep all the clips below:

The Internet is ALL IN for the show and has been reacting to scenes from the episodes on social media.  And by reacting, we mean gagging.  Below are some reactions: 

  when Cameron looked in Lauren's eyes and said "I promise i will take care of you baby" #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/RO5gxb4sRD

— Bimbzy Jay (@ladybimbzey) February 28, 2020

Lauren swearing and then apologising to the pastor #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/jZQdCg6fZd

— alot of people will be scared (@its_minnie3) February 28, 2020

Just finished the love is blind finale. Thanks Cameron and Lauren for carrying THEE season on your necks #loveisblind pic.twitter.com/zwjEhQIFuN

— zamzam (@itszamzam_) February 28, 2020

When Giannina comes back from running away and stares at Damian. #LoveIsBlind #loveisblindnetflix #loveisblindfinale pic.twitter.com/CgYpSnM2Ww

— BECK - Queen of Tron (@I_Dream_Data) February 28, 2020

Me watching all the couples break up, but Lauren and Cameron staying together #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/5QedMwuNQ6

— Mara (@marasantanaaa) February 28, 2020

When Cameron told Lauren “I promise I’m going to take care of you baby” #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/bBtZiOgR7u

— mamba forever (@dioruadore) February 28, 2020

Mark’s mom when Jessica was coming down the aisle #loveisblindfinale #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/1Vhtsnw2P5

— Laige Pindsey (@iironicaa) February 28, 2020

Me watching the wedding episode of #loveisblind after all the other times I’ve been shooketh in the past hour. #laurenandcameron I ship them so hard I can’t pic.twitter.com/aNXpPm2bb4

— jbrooksie27 (@jbrooksie271) February 28, 2020

Ok this what I be waiting on #laurenandcameron pic.twitter.com/tiFoGiXUFq

— Whitty (@WhitneyLeola) February 28, 2020

Me yesterday: I'd never be the white man's whore!

Me today: *watching #laurenandcameron getting married*#loveisblindnetflix #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/IAnXroTsOv

— Wakanda fresh h*ll is this? (@DaWakandaTarget) February 27, 2020

Lauren and Cameron’s wedding is out.... I’m ready to cry on the tube #LoveIsBlind #laurenandcameron pic.twitter.com/tX5h2wu4Mw

— spam account (@GRAYVSGREY) February 27, 2020

Cameron and Lauren watching their Instagram followers go up and people asking for a spin off. Awww yeah #LoveIsBlind #loveisblindnetflix #laurenandcameron pic.twitter.com/UqNpPTsRMa

— LBoogie (@lplockkk) February 27, 2020

PUT ON YOUR GOWNS, SLIPPERS, PEARLS, JAMMIES, TUXEDOS OR WHATEVER AND HEAD TO THE LIVING ROOM. The ceremonies BEGIN IN 50 MINUTES!!! #LaurenAndCameron #LoveIsBlindNetfix pic.twitter.com/g7lyq6QJAB

— Kels (@zaynlove2016) February 27, 2020

Me talking to everyone about #LoveIsBlind even though they don’t watch the show pic.twitter.com/WQH5ReWlXm

— J. (@j_goic) February 22, 2020

Me trying to figure out who are these other people on the Cameron and Lauren show?? #LoveIsBlind #netflix pic.twitter.com/oy52BSbpiL

— Jasmyn Alexis (@itsjasmynalexis) February 20, 2020

Fast forwarding through everyone else on #loveisblind so I can just watch Lauren and Cameron! The best connection on any TV dating show I’ve seen in awhile!!! #LoveIsBlind #LoveIsBlindNetflix #Netflix #LaurenandCameron pic.twitter.com/JLN7KSYbbn

— Housewife Hoe (@brav_hoequeen) February 17, 2020

me, before watching love is blind: i want a black ass husband black ass kids black ass family me, after watching #loveisblind: pic.twitter.com/FF4czO1kNI

— jess (@tv_jessica_) February 22, 2020

me welcoming people as they slowly trickle into the Love is Blind fandom pic.twitter.com/OMq9yWoC7G

— Nick Morrow (@NRMorrow) February 25, 2020

When Cameron tells Lauren he’s gonna take care of her #LoveIsBlind pic.twitter.com/0dLlHRluyi

— Knock off Meg the Stallion  (@moniemeetsworld) February 28, 2020

The "Love Is Blind" reunion begins streaming on Netflix this Thursday, March 5th. Catch the spicy sneak peek below: 

  *Pours wine in preparation*

Photos: Splash/Getty Images for Netflix

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2020/03/03/%E2%80%98love-is-blind%E2%80%99-star-lauren-speed-wants-brown-girls-to-know-this-about-finding-your-soul-

[little-kitten-aqua]

Tagged by the darling @chris-phd​!! Thank you sweetie!!

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

Oh geez, the question I allllll ways have trouble answering. I started tumblr as “catofmanyfandoms” at the tender age of 15, and you know I don’t remember when I changed it to little-kitten-aqua... There’s not a real story behind it other than Aqua is a nickname I had for a loooooong time, and I love little kittens?

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos)

I’m gonna make a guess before I go check and say it’s YVC....

Yup. Yokohama Vampire Crisis in every category besides hits, in which it looses to “Bad Kittens Get Spanked.” Why.. I don’t know.

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

Dazai!! Honestly Dazai and I are so similar I couldn’t make my icon anything but him!

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

I mean, Stuffie always spoils me with their long, in-depth reviews of my stuff

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

Oh geez, I download a ton of fanfics for reading again and again and again and especially when my internet is down. I think I’m up in the 30s with saved fanfics from AO3??

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

I.... I think I only have Seikibetsu subscribed... I’m a picky person with my stories that I follow. As for bookmarks, I’ve been trying to keep up with those and make more of them instead of just flittering off in an ADD haze but yeah.. not going too well.

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

Oh geez. Definitely omega verse. Hands down. YVC is even edited omega verse.... Omega verse really is just my favorite thing.

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

!!! A lot more than I thought!!! 9 User subscriptions, 79 bookmarks, and 17 subscriptions!! Wow!!!!

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

There are some more taboo things that I consider writing, but considering they’re preeeeeeeetty taboo I’m not sure I’d ever share them.

I mean, I made huge strides with the fucking medical kink fic.

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

Oh geez my fight scenes probably need help. That and my pacing, sometimes I just speed through things cause I don’t find them interesting. Just gimme that good fluff, please~!

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

Usually rarepairs! But there are a few fandoms in which I like more popular ships.

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

45!!

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

..... ....... A lot

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

Oh geez, I do a ton of different stuff and keep ideas all over the place, sometimes I just run across ideas randomly when cleaning out files and I’m like “oh that’s nice!” and then place it somewhere else and completely forget about it.

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

Nope!!

16. How did you discover AO3?

Oh geez it was probably a while ago, even though I only joined earlier this year. It was probably during one of the fanfiction.net purges haha!

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

Maybe??? I dunno! I know I’m the only one in the Dazai/Kunikida/Katai tag and I’m a lot of the Kunikida/Dazai tag so... maybe??

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

Not really!! I think “kittens” is a cute nickname, though!

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

Oh geez, Stuffie did a ton to encourage me to keep going with YVC and other stuff, but there’s really never been one exact driving force behind my work.

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

Just write it. It might suck, but you can’t create something good until you’ve worked out all of the bad. And even then you’ll make bad stuff. Just enjoy what you’re doing and you’re good!

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

Oh gosh, I’m so all over the place with this. I get some plots out and others I just wing it and work as I go. YVC is one that I’ve done intensive plotting for, but that was with help and everything haha

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH YEAH. I’ve gotten some shitty stuff. So I turned anonymous comments off and comment moderation on and waited for a while. Yeah, transphobes and some other choice characters have come to me.

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

Fight scenes are reeeeaaaally hard, and since I tend to focus more on the erotica side of things, f/f scenes are really fucking difficult for me. I just get bored and flitter off, or get uncomfy.

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

Well, I (surprisingly!!!!) just finished part one of YVC so now I’m on to work on part 2, and then whatever the hell I decide to do next hahaha!!

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

Oh man hell no. It’s a party up in my brain, ideas all over the place. Who knows what’s going on? Not me.

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

PFFFFFFFT. I rarely have enough energy to finish everything I need to do in one day, why would I give my disabled ass more?

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

I... think so? I mean, I’ve improved from when I was writing my first fanfics at 2... but that’s just age and experience. But I mean even just from the beginning of YVC to now, I think I’ve improved at least a little bit.

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

I love nearly all of my stories? There’s not a lot that I don’t like. I really only write what I want to, so that helps me like it all.

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

Oh boy there are, however, a few pieces from prompt lists that I feel like I just fucking bombed. They’re shorter pieces mostly cause I lost interest half-way through, or tried something new only for it to fail spectacularly.

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

Ideally? I’ve got a nice fully-funded Patreon to make/write ero games and everything’s good.

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

Smut. Boy I am so versed in writing smut.

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

You second-guess yourself sooooo much. It’s a lot of the reason why I post mostly non-beta’d stuff!

33. Why do you write?

Um.... That’s a great question. I write cause it... comes naturally to me? I don’t have to work super hard to churn out a lot. It’s also really freeing, you can write anything happening. You can write magical fairytale romances that you know would never exist in real life but you can imagine and dream and there’s nothing stopping you but the limits of language. (Which themselves can be bent and broken) So really, I like the freedom it gives me.

As for tagging people, ummmm.... if you wanna do this feel free! I’m always so bad at tagging OTL

[faeshiftersmore-archive]

another mun meme, feel free to repost.

NICKNAME: Ummmm.... GoldMun, RumpleMun, I guess? Don't really have many/any nicknames right now. STAR SIGN: Taurus, Dragon for Chinese Zodiac. HEIGHT: 5 feet 10 inches CURRENT TIME: 12pm FAVE MUSIC ARTIST: I listen to too many different music artists to pick just one... LAST MOVIE WATCHED: Rob Zombie's “31”. Wasn't bad but ending was kind of lacking IMO. LAST SHOW WATCHED: Been watching a couple lately. Rewatching season two of “Sanctuary”. Just finished season one of Brooklyn Nine Nine and going to watch season two soon. Also watching Gabriel DropOut, Interviews with Monster Girls, and Miss Kobayashi's Dragon maid on Crunchyroll. WHEN DID YOU CREATE YOUR BLOG: 22 December 2016 WHAT KIND OF STUFF DO YOU POST: Role Play threads, memes, things that my muse likes, other random stuff. Trying to figure out more stuff to post and reblog actually. OTHER BLOGS: I have another RP for the slasher Candyman @the-whisper-in-the-classroom it is not as active as this one right now, but I do still love it. WHY DID YOU CHOOSE YOUR URL: My url... this character was originally a genderbent version of Mr. Gold and Rumplestilskin from Once Upon a Time. “Rule 63” is a internet “rule” that says “For every given male character, there is a female version of that character and visa versa.” So gold, 63, and all became “msGold63” HOGWARTS HOUSE: I never got into Harry Potter (I know, I know, you all hate me now lol) sooo... I have no idea. AVG HOURS SLEEP: Around five to six and a half. HOW MANY BLANKETS DO YOU SLEEP WITH?: Two or three and a sheet. At least right now during winter time. DREAM JOB: Writing or producing music.

TAGGED BY: @thecorteztwins TAGGING: Not sure who all has done this or something similar. I guess @the-amazing-amazon , @nxromance ,  @swreid,  @absinthefaeriequeen , @oflovesongs , and anyone else that wants to do it.

[malachitelibrary]

Entity Reading for Monsterwitchcraft

An entity reading is where I directly converse with specific entities you ask me to talk to, with questions for them that you come up with, and record what they say. This is @monsterwitchcraft​‘s entity reading, which was posted with their permission. 

Note: Where things are [in brackets], are things I have added to aid with context and clarity. All other things are direct quotes from your spirits.

The “Professor” said:

- What should my focus be with energy working?

“Basic meditation is still something you could work on improving, though it’s not the act of meditation itself which is what you truly need help with, it is the act of focusing and maintaining that focus. But, more in particular to energy working, try healing; it is much more universally applicable than you think it may be, and it can be used to gain goodwill with others, both humans and spirits alike.”

- Do you think continuing reiki training would benefit me?

“Yes, to a certain extent. You already have the basic attunement if I remember correctly, however, I know how pricey it is to continue your education. You should...Hmm. This is not my decision. But I would say yes, it would be beneficial; you gain access to a very high-quality energy source that never runs out, you gain a community in which people have similar experiences and can share tricks, and you gain much knowledge in general. This is my personal opinion, but I think it would be in your best interest to continue it.”

- How do you prefer to communicate?

“Well...directly, though I know you are not capable of that yet. No matter, you will gain it over time, do not look down on yourself. Stichomancy may be the easiest for me, especially those with your online generators that can pick words at random from random books. Tarot, I’m also familiar with. I would prefer stichomancy in combination with tarot; use one to confirm/deny the other. But if you must pick one alone, stichomancy would be the best. “

- Do you want to finish that book or start a new one?

“Finish that book. I do not like leaving books unfinished, unless they are truly terrible and not worth reading. “

V said:

- What can I do to help you grow?

….”Foooood :3c. Ummm...I don’t know, make sure I don’t die or do anything dangerous or stupid??”

- How old are you now?

“In human years or dragon years? [I guess human years since we don’t know dragon]. Umm 200 something?? I think?? I’m really not sure, it’s hard to know since I’m not too familiar with your time set-up “[referring to our days/year/etc length].

- Do you have a caretaker? Parents?

“You take care of me! Parents? I mean I was born from them, but no if they’re around somewhere, I don’t know them. But I live in like...a group of..nice dragons of sorts? We all take care of each other, so it’s all good! I don’t think I’ve told you much about them yet. I’m still kinda… :/ on talking about them since none of us are super big and able to like. Fight things (makes pow-pow motions). “

- What kind of music do you like?

“Ummmm I don’t know specific names of music types?? At least not human music types. But I guess I like music that’s either reallllly super calming, that I can sleep to, or really bright and energetic music!”

- What's your favorite game?

“???? (she cocked her head to the side). I’m guessing you don’t mean dragon games. I guess I...really like watching people play video games?? I don’t have fingers so I can’t play a lot of human games :< I’d love to watch you play games with other people, though!!”

- If I were to change the space I've made, what's your ideal hangout spot?

“Uhh I think..whatever place is highest? Besides the ceiling fan. And is soft and squishy, why does your pet get a cool bed and I dooon’t :v. But I don’t know besides that, I’m not super picky.”

Ni said:

- Are we okay? + - Does my relationship with Verkonilous bother you? If so, how/why?

“I...don’t feel comfortable talking about this with an outsider, but I know you wouldn’t have picked this reading if you weren’t certain of it. We’re not as okay as we could be, there’s a couple of things that are bothering me. The relationship with Verkonilous is one of them, I know how you feel about him but I don’t trust him. I know he hasn’t done anything outwardly malicious but...I dunno..I don’t. Just. :/. Besides that, I think you should work on your protections more. Having a lot of spirits, us, hanging around in one small place is bound to attract something bad sooner or later-I don’t mean to spook you, I just want you to feel ready or safe. Read up on those things and I’ll help you out a bit….Would also like a few more snacks :3”

- Do you like to travel with me (astral)? What's your ideal adventure?

“I will go with you to keep you safe, of course. But I think you should stick to more peaceful realms for now, your fight skills aren’t exactly what I would like them to be. But for ideal adventure...I don’t know, I haven’t really thought about it (besides ocean-y places). “

- Why the ocean?

“Why not? The ocean is cool and I like it. I mean, I feel like you were expecting something super symbolic here, but. In all honesty, I just like it. Plus I think your energy would work well with ocean energy, you might disagree though. “

M said:

- What's the best way to communicate with you?

[Spooky Scary Skeleton nightcore started playing in my head when he entered.] “Are memes a valid answer? Hehe, but to the point- I would really love it if you were able to hear me like this- but I know it takes a shit ton of concentration and energy. I guess if there is a meme and you think I sent it- then it probably was me? A form of divination on your...blue internet thing you’re always on [tumblr]. But supposedly for more serious things...you’re more experienced in tarot, so let’s stick with that. Also songs are a valid form of communication for many humans, I’ve heard, so that works too. “

- What do you like to do? How can I spend time with you? You wanna get a coffee or somethin??

“I would love a coffee- but I am, in fact, a skeleton, with no stomach. Don’t think that would work :/. But maybe I can figure something out, absorb its energy. [Nods solemnly]. But…[as for specific things] I don’t know. I don’t really do much besides stand around and talk a lot, and pranks. I dunno. I’m not picky, I can have fun anywhere- anything you do for fun, count me in. (As long as it’s not like literature or something, I’m not a big “booky” skeleton.”

- Do you want to talk about your past life, or is that sensitive for you?

“I would be open to talking about it, but not with a stranger, sorry. But yeah feel free to ask me questions when I get back. “

N said:

“Um….I know sometimes you don’t think I really exist, so hiiiiiiiii [waves with tail].”

D said:

“Hiiiii.” [He couldn’t think of anything to say so he just stuck with that, seemed more curious about the readings than actually wanting to contribute.]

----------------

Legal Disclaimer: All readings are for entertainment purposes only.

[survivormyanmar-blog]

Ep. #11- “This Game Is Crackedt” - Sam

After a 10 day break for the holidays, the game started back up again and the players were presented with their next  immunity challenge, Tile Flip.  In the challenge Tommy claims he threw it to let Sam get the largest section of the grid to himself and Sam won immunity.  By this point everyone in the game knew that Jay was the biggest threat but Jay was trying to round people up to take out Tommy.  She had some success actually convincing Leah to vote for Tommy.  Jay made a mistake though trying to cause paranoia by telling Tommy that Leah brought up his name.  This caused Tommy to go back to Leah with this information which made Leah flip out and change her vote to Jay.  Jay was sent home in a 7-1 vote.

Well, I've never been on the bottom in an ORG before, so that's a fun development. If nothing else, losing all my allies except for one (Linus, shout out to you for not being a giant bag of small dicks) means I'll get to really flex my game skills. I'm going hard as fuck on the next challenge because if I lose, it's probably the end of me. But if I make it to the end, assholes, then thank you for putting someone who loves me on the jury.

You know what sucks? Still being in the game but feeling like people are already campaigning for your jury vote.

since i promised this I MADE THE CHRISTMAS BREAK!!!! what kind of survivor magic you know as much as playing on the bottom sucked, I needed to figure out how to play the game differently. I used to just have this rogue-esque style of gameplay that never put me on the "bottom" because I was usually just thinking about myself and not my allies. now, I'm back in a majority (that is still very fluid), but I safely feel like I'm no longer at the bottom of a specific group. I feel like I've refined my game and made it more social, and I needed the experience of bottom-feeding to do that. I need momentum for when we come out of the break; it's time for me to start winning this thing.

"The best laid schemes of mice and men often go awry" -Robert Burns Well, that tribal sucked. What's running through my head right now is I must be considered such a non factor in the game to people that they just aren't attempting to play the social game with me. My reason for thinking this is because unless they are actually jury threats somehow, this vote was absolutely moronic for Leah, Amanda (and Ting if she's lying about her reasoning for the vote). The only person this helps at all is Ashley from my perspective, which means either I'm playing with idiots, or my perspective is way off. I feel from a strategy perspective for myself I have to assume the latter. Leah, Amanda and Ting need to get to the end with a goat from what I see, so why cut a goat when the goats could have formed a majority in the alliance once Tommy and Sam are gone? Ting's reasoning is that the vote was already in Christian and she just wanted to be in the majority (which is reasonable, I did the same on the Brett vote), and Ashley claims she heard about the vote 10 minutes before tribal. I am more prone to believe Ting on a logical level, but Ashley's story actually does kind of check out too since she was gone all day. The problem now is figuring out h approach to move forward. I feel like if I play my cards right I can stay safe, but I have to figure out if Amanda and Leah secretly are some social beasts or something and I need to appeal to a strategic mind, or if I need to make a serious call out post in the main chat and maybe wake some people up to their position in the game.

Linus is not funny but I'm not funnIER

i just typed a huge game confession and my internet went out happy 2017... i'll try again tomorrow

oh wow i won something! i'm not really sure how this vote is going to work out; i'm expecting that jay will have something to offer me tomorrow. that, or she'll try to blindside me so that i'm at the point at which i have to win immunity. anyway, it's dope to at least make it back to 7th again. but i'm not done. time to go to work.

okay apparently people are paranoid that tommy is gonna play an idol like I WANNA SEE THE CHAOS

LET ME IN I'M ALL ABOUT THAT SHIT

this game crackedt.

[1/4/2017 10:50:34 PM] Nigel (Linus) Silversides: How are you feeling on the vote? [1/4/2017 10:51:27 PM] Ashley Hudson: Ummmm I am really not sure because I dont really know where anyone's head is at [1/4/2017 10:53:15 PM] Nigel (Linus) Silversides: Yeah, people have been quiet :( . You're kinda the one calling the shots right now though so I was hoping you'd maybe heard something. [1/4/2017 10:53:31 PM] Nigel (Linus) Silversides: (Thats not meant as an attack on you for being in the power position in any way, sorry it was worded badly ahdfjlhads) Well... This is new. A power position?! Me?! How?! I guess people have been assuming Leah, Amanda and I are a thing but I odn't quite see how that would make me in a powerful position. Help.

So Tommy called with Amanda and I and told us that Leah ran to Jay before the last vote and told her that the plan was majority on Christian. Thankfully Leah didn't flip or anything, but just the fact that she told Jay about it before tribal is annoying as heck. Like idek if I can trust her anymore. She is in an alliance chat with Tommy, Amanda, Sam, and myself. So I have been trying to not talk much in the chat and work more with Tommy and Amanda. Amanda and I are tight still, I guess you could call it a F2. My second person I would say is Tommy. I really want to trust Ting Ting but all she is saying to me is that she will go with whatever I say which is kinda sketchy so I will be cautious with that one. For tribal tonight I have no idea what is happening, so that is cool. I think if people play their idols I might too. Might as well be safe rather than sorry. Jay is supposedly trying to pull in the ranks because she thinks that it will be her tonight, so if she does that, and if people fall for it, she could get a group together unfortunately. I however, don't think I will be the initial target they choose. Jay has suggested Amanda before and unfortunately she might again. So we really need to be careful. I can't go losing my biggest ally tonight. But I also need to keep an eye out for myself.

People I trust?: Amanda Tommy People I am unsure about: Sam Leah Ting Ting People I will be looking out for anything, and I mean anything sketchy: Jay Linus Maybe we will see a split vote tonight? Tommy Amanda and I were talking about it. maybe a 4 and 2? Like our most trustworthy people on the 4, and then the 2 could be like Leah and Ting Ting. In case they flip, it would be 4 and 4. However, we may have to make it seem as if Leah and Ting Ting are voting in the majority so they don't feel any urge to switch. So possibly lie to them and say Linus, then have the majority vote Jay? That could be messed up if Ting Ting or Leah flip, and Jay plays an idol... So tbh our ideas have cons and pros and I am not sure what is going to happen tonight.

My kink is being on the bottom, knowing I'm on the bottom, and still having to play nice. Like, I wish people would stop bullshitting me. Don't campaign for my jury vote before you murder me. Assholes. At least if I go tonight, it won't be a blindside.

okay uh now jay is brewing up some bubble bubble toil and trouble shit and saying that ashley is some kind of strategic mastermind?? I agree that ashley is in a good spot but I'm not sure she's the one calling all the shots over there. then again, I could be very wrong. I've been wrong before.

Well this is quite the yikes fest. I literally don't even know how to describe what's hopefully going to happen. So the overall plan is to vote Jay out. So I definitely know that we have me, Tommy, Sam, Amanda, and Ashley which is good enough to have a majority. But let me tell you, there are fireworks. Like it's the 4th of July out here. Bc first, Jay wanted to get me out, because apparently she doesn't trust me anymore, which is totally understandable, but like she thinks that I'm cocky and act above her and like always expect her trust, which I don't. But like sorry i lied to you, i know that sucks, but you've done it to me so... Anyways, everyone's worried I have something from the cave but like all i've gotten is scuba gear WHICH ISN'T EVEN HELPFUL ANYMORE, LIKE THANKS A LOT TREVOR AND OWEN. I just have the stupid legacy advantage which i don't even know what it is yet but like anyway Leah helped to get Jay to not vote me hopefully, so like go her love you. And then Leah and Jay were like let's go vote Tommy. And I was kinda like well shit how about not bc he's like my numero uno. So then Tommy like outed Jay to Leah and then Leah got paranoid so hopefully she changed her vote to Jay. So yeah. Also Linus' name was thrown in there by someone (idk who) so I kinda convinced him to vote Jay to keep himself safe in the upcoming votes. So hopefully all goes well. I mean if she has an idol then we're kinda fucked but you know life also kinda fucks you up too. It's all about the challenge brochachos.(also like i'm the only asian left. plz keep me in. all the asians of the entire world will love you 5ever)

okay so now jay is coming around saying "hey i've only heard linus and ting ting" like WHAT????? you were just taking to me about how you think you're going and ALSO you're pushing for tommy and you aren't even throwing out either name! i feel kinda bad for everyone they seem really like stressed and shit because jay has literally thrown out everyone as a possible target. i'm kinda lucky that i'm immune and i guess it couldn't have come at a better time but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i still got the feels

Back from the break... I threw immunity to Sam so he owes me like A LOT! Like he owes me his life in this game. Amanda/Ashley/Myself talked about a target and we all agreed on Jay and I gave them tea that Jay was after them. So it's been a crazy turn of events Leah tried to vote me out by telling Jay to vote for me then Jay told Linus and Ting Ting. Jay also mentioned Ting Ting's name and I told her. Also Linus was messaging me about hearing my name and it all turned crazy af. Basically I went back to Leah and told her Jay told me that she was after me and Leah went bizerk, Ting Ting ended up helping me by using her paranoia (or so I think) to get Leah to think Jay was after her. Basically this tribal is just a train wreck and the only people I kind of trust are Sam and Ting Ting. If all 3 of us can survive until Final 6 I think we'll be good for a majority of the game if that's what they want to do as well. This game is crazy af and I have a huge possibility of going home tonight.... I really need Jay out this vote so everything falls into place. I'm just hoping nobody plays an idol on her and I hope I don't go home.

okay this is a call out confession trevor these tribal questions have such an ATTITUDE like WHAT??? i'm ready to fight

"Nothing to win and; Nothing left to lose" -U2 Well damn. It looks like the run of Linus may be coming to it's end, or at best I may be losing my number 1 closest ally in the game :( . If I go home, than Ill be disappointed I never made my big callout move, but I gotta go with the info I have and it looks like laying low is my best chance at not going. If Jay goes and is reading this after, know that I'm sorry and this isn't personal in the slightest.

I dont remember the last thing i wrote so i might be backtracking-- - Ashley told me she has an idol - People think me Ash and Leah are a trio...yikes - Me Ash and Tommy actually have a trio chat....and another chat with Sam included lmfao Now to the vote, this shit is confusing as FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK So me Ashley and Tommy want to vote for Jay, and Ting Ting and Leah came to me wanting to vote for Jay but then Ash heard Ting say Tommy and Jay wants Tommy and IDK WHATS GOING ON ugh i'm so confused I have a really bad feeling that a ton of powers and shit are gonna get played and i'm gonna end up going home. I know Ashley's most likely playing her idol cause she's nervous and that might spark shit and UGH. MY ASS IS PROB GONNA LEAVE CAUSE OF THE CAVE AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET MY DAMN CHICKEN. Im gonna die. I have a gut feeling. Its the same feeling I had the week Steffen left and its not a good feeling.