#so i splurged on the big bottles and now i’m like.. i think america just does me good. i think i just glow there

[fingertipsmp3]

Tbh I also think if your expensive shampoo makes my hair worse I should be allowed to kill you with a rock

[biggest-stupidhead]

Bad Timing (Levi x reader) Part 11

Summary: How do you tell your friends that you’re falling for your big brother’s best friend? 

Word Count: 8.2K (longest one yet) 

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The next few days flew by in a snowy blur. Most of your time was spent wrapping gifts and packaging baked goods to deliver to family friends. You grunted as you leaned heavily on top of the Tupperware container as you shoved in more sugar cookies. This particular batch was going to Erwin's coach and his family. The sound of wrapping paper tearing made you cringe, turning around you saw Hange holding up the two uneven lengths of paper. She smiled sheepishly at you before shrugging and taping the pieces together once more. Your mom and Erwin were currently out shopping at the mall, which was a good hour away from the hick town you lived in.

You and Hange had already been out shopping the other day. It had been very stressful shopping for all your friends and family. You were glad to have gotten the ordeal over with. Although it was stressful, you had enjoyed picking out the perfect gift for your loved ones. Some highlights included: a camera lense for Armin, a set of chain necklaces for Mikasa, a turkey hat for Sasha, a safari hat for Connie, and your personal favorite was a set of fancy tea cups for Levi.

You really had outdone yourself this year, even going as far as buying Erwin supplies that he would need for College. For Hange you had purchased her a fresh set of glassware for her experiments, since she was majoring in Chemistry and enjoyed doing work outside of the classroom you thought it was a fitting gift. Hange held up her finished product proudly, judging by the size of the box you guessed it was a pair of shoes.

"I can't wait to give these to him!" she gushed as she set the box to the side and began folding a sweater that the two of you had purchased for your mom.

"Yeah I'm sure he'll love them." you agreed. You weren't the only one who had splurged this year. Hange had bought Erwin a fresh pair of cleats for his freshman season at college.

"I hope so!" she chuckled as she boxed the sweater and the pair of earrings for your mom.

"What did you ask for this year?" you asked as you set the stuffed container of cookies to the side.

"Oh nothing special." Hange waved her hand dismissively. You weren't surprised, she wasn't exactly interested in possessions. She valued knowledge above most things, so the closest you could get to filling that need was to give her books or items that helped her learn and shit. You had learned that the hard way, a few years ago you had given her a nice bracelet, which was currently collecting dust on her dresser.

"Well what about your parents, are they doing something special this year?" you inquired, you knew that she had learned to appreciate knowledge from them. They used to go on trips and spend Christmas soaking up the culture of wherever they went. One of their most notable trips was to South America, Hange's favorite trip to date. They hiked in the jungle and learned about the environment and shit.

"Aw sadly no, they wanted to take a break and focus on their research here." She shrugged as she wrapped the box in snowman wrapping paper.

"Really?" you mused, although Hange's family was unconventional you admired their free spirit.

"Yeah, I'm particularly interested in my mom's project, she's studying these penguins in South America right now-" she continued to ramble on about her mother's studies and her father's work. Both of her parents were very active in the zoology community. Hange's rant was cut short by the sound of her phone ringing, she apologized before answering the call, walking out of the room for some privacy. Which you thought was odd, she usually wasn't so private with her phone calls, which at times could be annoying. You brushed it off as most likely being a conversation about gifts. You picked up your phone, taking the opportunity to answer the text that Mikasa had sent you earlier that morning.

"We'll be over around 7." her text made you feel giddy with excitement. Although this year would be a bit different you were still excited to see all your friends.

"See you soon!" you responded, you realized that it was probably a good idea to start dinner for your mom. She should be home any minute but still you set about preheating the oven for the casserole and the ham. Thankfully the Jeagers brought dishes as well, Carla made a mean pumpkin pie. You weren't expecting Kenny to bring anything other than booze. You fell into an easy rhythm as you prepared the vegetable casserole. It couldn't have been more than an hour later that your mom and Erwin stumbled in the door and dropped the bags down by the card table where we had been wrapping gifts. Your mom was quick to wash her hands and start the mashed potatoes as you checked the ham. Hange had began to set the table with Erwin, a christmas playlist had been playing to set the mood.

The Jeagers arrived right at 7, just in time. Grisha's arms were full with gifts, Carla toted two pies, Eren held a board game, and Mikasa had two bottles of red wine with ribbons around the necks of the bottles. Hugs and formalities were exchanged as they entered and put their gifts under the tree. Carla joined your mom in the kitchen to finish carving the ham. You and the other teens finished setting the table as everyone trickled into the dining room.

Just as the ham was placed on the table and glasses of wine were poured, the doorbell rang once more. Kenny had arrived, surprisingly only thirty minutes late. He had a huge bottle of vodka and another sizable bottle of whiskey. Your mom greeted him, taking the liquor from him and pointing him to his seat. Now that all guests were accounted for you began to dish out food and recount the past holidays that your families spent together. It didn't go unnoticed that Kenny was a tad uncomfortable, but thanks to Grisha's easy going nature and Carla's friendliness, he slowly eased up. Of course you and the other teens had your own conversation separate from the adults.

"-Do you remember that one year that I creamed you guys in Just Dance?" Hange gloated as she waved a forkful of ham in Eren's face.

"Ugh yes, but only because that was the year that Mikasa's ankle was sprained." Eren deflected, lifting his own fork to push hers from his face. Mikasa blushed and shoved a spoonful of mashed potatoes into her mouth.

"Well I guess we'll just have to see if that was the real reason after a rematch!" Hange teased before biting into the hunk of meat.

"I guess we will." Eren narrowed his eyes as he watched Hange chew the meat.

"We should play Mario Kart first, I want to redeem myself." Armin was quick to change the subject. Always quick to avoid possible conflict.

"Yeah I totally creamed you last time!" you gloated a cocky smile on your lips.

"W-What! No I had the most wins!" Eren's eyes were alight with anger. He was too easy to piss off.

"Wrong!" you said in a sing song voice.

"Knock it off you two." Erwin scolded from across the table, Eren's cheeks flushed when Erwin scolded him but you simply rolled your eyes. In the last few months Erwin had taken to hovering over you and your friends. It was strange, he had never shown so much interest in your social life until recently. At first you had been eager to tell him what was going on in your friend group, but now it was becoming annoying.

"Lay off Erwin, it's all talk." you scoffed with a roll of your eyes. Erwin's eyes hardened at your snarky tone, your guests eyes flickered between the two of you as you glared at one another. Until finally you snorted and looked away with a shake of your head.

"Uh...so who wants pie!" Armin, ever true to his anti confrontation nature filled the thick silence between the teens. Meanwhile the adults had continued to yammer on about all the hot hospital gossip.

"I-I would." Eren played into Armin's excuse to change the subject.

"Yeah sounds good." you sighed, defeated. Armin scrambled out of his seat and ducked into the kitchen, returning a few moments later with the pies. He dished out three pieces onto you and Eren's plates before serving himself. By the time he had returned, Hange had already changed the topic to the party the following day. You sat in silence as she rambled about the logistics for the party at your house.

"I think that Nanaba is bringing mac and cheese, Mike is probably going to bring those snicker doodles that he always makes-" You tuned her out, not interested in her current rant. Tomorrow's party wasn't the party you were really excited for. So you instead turned to Mikasa, hoping to talk about your plans for the 26th.

"So what time are you going to Annie's? Would you like to ride together?" you asked as you angled yourself to face her to better tune out Hange.

"We are heading over around 9, and sure I'm driving." Mikasa responded as she stretched to serve herself a piece of pie.

"Perfect, are you spending the night there?" you quizzed, unsure if you also wanted to spend the night there.

"No, we were going to go back to Armin's but I can drop you off here if you want." Mikasa answered as she took a bite of pie.

"Alright that sounds good!" you agreed, knowing that Mikasa was always a reliable designated driver.

__

Dinner had gone relatively smooth, despite the tension that now hung in the atmosphere between you and Erwin. The rest of the evening was spent in the living room opening gifts with a Christmas movie marathon playing in the background. The Jeagers left around eleven, which was later than they usually stayed. Kenny took the guest bedroom in the basement, since he was spending Christmas day with your family anyway. You checked your phone with a heavy sigh, already it was twelve am. You contemplated texting Levi to tell him happy birthday, but you weren't sure he would be awake. It was already six in the morning in France, and usually he got his three hours of sleep between four and seven in the morning. But you decided that if he didn't answer you could leave him a voicemail or shoot him a text. So after you changed into your pajamas and had snuggled beneath your covers, you pulled up Levi's contact, your thumb hovering over the small phone icon. Finally you just said 'fuck it' and pressed the button, the phone rang three times before he answered.

"Hey." his voice was thick and gravely as he spoke, immediately you felt bad. You knew that you must have woken him up and you cringed internally.

"Hey happy birthday!" you greeted, making sure to keep your voice low so you wouldn't disturb Erwin and Hange.

"Tch thanks." Levi mumbled, you pictured him running a hand down his face as he tried to wake up.

"you're welcome birthday boy." you teased as you fell back onto your pillows.

"shut up." Levi scoffed, you could hear his footsteps as he walked through the apartment, presumably to get his morning cup of black tea.

"you know you love it." you sighed.

"keep telling yourself that." Levi's voice was becoming clearer now that he was more awake.

"I think that I will." you answered with a light laugh.

"you still going to that party tomorrow?" Levi interrogated, you groaned. You had almost forgotten how he liked to stick his nose in your business, even when he was across the fucking ocean.

"Yeah what about it?" you huffed, feeling a bit defensive.

"Shouldn't you stay with your family or some shit." Levi sounded frustrated.

"My mom said I could go." you pouted childishly.

"Whatever." Levi grunted, and you frowned, unsure of where his frustration was coming form.

"Aw come on no need to be jealous, I'm sure you can find some rager in Paris. Not like you'll be missing much here." you chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

"Hmph." Levi scoffed, you could hear the tinkling of his spoon as he stirred his tea.

"So....when are you due to be home?" you asked, deciding it was best to change the subject.

"Next week." Levi's tone was clipped.

"I'm so jealous." you sighed dreamily.

"Yeah Paris is way better than Shiganshina." Levi responded nonchalantly, you weren't sure if he was being serious or sarcastic. Either way he was telling the truth.

"No need to rub it in my face." you chuckled.

"Tch." He scoffed, you liked to imagine him smiling as he did so, even if he wasn't.

"Well I hope that this next week goes by fast, as much as I hate to admit it I've... missed you." you confessed, the tips of your ears scorching hot with embarrassment. The silence was deafening as you waited for him to say something, hell anything even if it was making fun of you.

"Whatever." he huffed, the butterflies in your stomach fluttered at the sound of his baritone voice.

"Just don't stay out late tomorrow." he quipped and you frowned, why did he care how late you stayed out?

"No need to worry about me, I'll probably just stay sober with Mikasa." You told him, only half honest.

"Never said I was worried about you." Levi sighed.

"Hmph fine be like that." you scoffed and rolled your eyes, not surprised with his response.

"Be like what?" He asked, genuinely curious what you meant.

"Like an ass." you quipped.

"Tch I'll quite being an ass when you stop being such a brat." Levi snapped, clearly you were approaching dangerous territory.

"Okay okay chill." you muttered, backing down before things got too heated.

"You're the one that brought it up.." Levi pointed out.

"Yeah and now I'm regretting that" you sighed, wishing he wouldn't be so stubborn for once. He sighed as well and you heard a small clatter on his end of the line, you figured he was starting the dishes.

"Look I've got some shit to do, I'll call you later okay?" Levi's voice was a tad strained and in the moment of silence you heard the sound of Isabel and Farlan bickering in hushed tones.

"Y-Yeah sure of course." you couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed.

"Happy birthday Levi." you wished him once more.

"Thanks, talk to you later brat." and with that he hung up, leaving you totally alone in your dark room. You plugged your phone in and rolled over onto your side, he could be so annoying. You inhaled sharply and decided that you would enjoy the party tomorrow to it's fullest. What he didn't know wouldn't kill him.

___

"Hey can I borrow your lip gloss?" you asked Mikasa as you leaned forward to apply another coat of mascara to your lashes.

"Sure which one?" she asked as she pulled her hair into high pigtails on top of her head.

"The cherry one." you answered after a moment of contemplation. She finished her hair before reaching into her makeup bag and pulled out the tube of clear gloss.

"Thanks." you said as you took the make up from her. You didn't usually put this much effort into your appearance when you went to parties but you figured since it was the first time you would be going to Annie's that this was a special occasion. Also you had a sneaking suspicion that two of your exes would be there and you at least wanted to look hot if you were going to get black out.

Plus Mikasa was also dressed up, she wore a tight fitting black top with long sleeves and a low cut neck line that showed off her pale collarbones and neck. She had chosen to wear a choker that had metallic studs surrounding the black leather along with some other layered necklaces. To match her top she had selected a red plaid skirt and some torn tights. You weren't dressed nearly as edgy as she was, but you too had gone for a grungier look. You'd opted to wear a tattered pair of mom jeans along with a black cropped tank and an oversized flannel to cover your shoulders.

You sighed as you finished applying the gloss and frowned, Eren and Armin were in the next room over blasting Post Malone. You assumed that Eren was on aux since Armin usually listened to Surfaces or Khalid.

"You ready?" Mikasa asked as she pulled on her Doc Martens and double checked her earrings.

"Yeah." you assured her as you stood up to grab your small backpack with an extra change of comfy clothes in case you ended up staying the night. The two of you left the room and knocked on Eren's door that was down the hall.

"Just a minute!" Armin's shrill voice sounded a bit panicked but Mikasa simply shrugged and headed towards the kitchen. The Jeager's house was a ranch style house with one main floor and a nice basement. The two of you waited patiently in the kitchen for the boys, it was already well past nine. You scrolled through your snapchat, most of the stories were the regular group picture of friends having a sleepover, the druggie kids showing off their weed, and of course Sasha and Connie posted a video showcasing the house party at Annie's. From what the short video showed, her house was dark except for some LED lights that flashed through multiple different colors. The music was deafening, and the kids that you could see seemed to be swaying to the pulsing music.Sasha spun the camera around as she knocked back a shot with her arm around Connie who blew a puff of vapor at the camera.

"Looks fun." Mikasa scoffed, you knew that she preferred more low-key parties.

"If you end up not liking it we can always dip." You shrugged, knowing that this wasn't exactly your speed either. Mikasa hummed in agreement and turned to look down the hallway as Eren's door opened. The boys emerged from Eren's room, Eren wore a pair of black jeans and a dark forrest green long sleeved shirt. Armin wore a baby blue knit sweater with a collared shirt underneath and black jeans as well.

"All set?" Mikasa asked as she turned to pull out a bottle of titos with a cute little sweater over it. You smiled at the cute accessory and nodded.

"Yep!" you said popping the p as the four of you all made your way out to Eren's car. You slid into the back seat next to Armin who was fiddling with the hem of his sweater nervously. Eren resumed his hype music as Mikasa backed out of the drive way. Eren pulled out his puff bar as soon as the car was out of the drive and took a long drag. Mikasa scoffed and cracked the window for him. He blew the billow of smoke out the window and reached to turn the music up. He reached back and dangled the puff for you to take, after a brief moment of hesitation you accepted it and cracked your window before taking a hit. Armin watched with wide eyes as you inhaled and blew the vapor out the crack.

"Since when did you vape?" Armin asked, his mouth agape in awe.

"I don't...at least not regularly." You admitted sheepishly.

"That's what they all say." Eren chuckled, smoke curling out from his lips as he smirked.

"Shut up I'm serious!" you snapped a playful smile on your face. Thankfully Annie's house wasn't far away, about a twenty minute drive. You pulled up to the house, it was huge. Standing at least three stories tall, with a long winding driveway. Mikasa pulled up behind one of the many cars in the drive way and parked the car. Mikasa led the way around to the side door, which was unlocked, piled of shoes littered the hallway. The sound of loud music greeted you as you walked into the kitchen on the main floor to set the alcohol you'd brought down. The real party was in the basement.

The lights were off, leaving the only source of light to be the flickering LED lights, you couldn't even tell who was who. The air was heavy with the mingling aromas of cologne, vapes, and weed. Armin practically clung to you as the four of you waded through the crowd to get to the seating area in the center of the room. As you got closer the overpowering scent of weed assaulted your nose. There on the large L shaped couch was Annie, she held a large bong to her lips as Bertolt held the lighter under the weed, she inhaled deeply and the bong bubbled. She pulled back and blew a puff of smoke right in Reiner's face, the blonde's face scrunched up in disgust as he turned away to cough.

"Yo." Annie greeted Mikasa who leaned down to dap her up. Once Annie had greeted Mikasa she turned her attention to Eren who was eyeing the bong.

"You want a drag?" Annie offered, patting the sofa next to her. Eren nodded and dropped down between her and Bertolt, who once again struck the lighter for Eren. Mikasa rolled her eyes and waited patiently for Eren to finish his drag. Once the bong was out of the way she lowered herself down onto his lap and pulled her puff bar out to take a long drag. Armin shifted awkwardly behind you and tugged on your sleeve.

"Want to go get something to drink?" he yelled over the booming music, you glanced at the bong longingly but decided that Armin needed you right now so you nodded in agreement.

"Sure." the two of you pushed through the crowd to the minibar where an impressive amount of liquor was waiting. You poured some Bacardi into a glass of and added some pineapple and orange concentrates before handing the cup to Armin. He thanked you and quickly got to work on finishing the mixed drink. You poured yourself a rum and coke and then two shots of Malibu for you and Armin to take. The two of you knocked back the shots before wandering back over towards the couch. The crowd had thinned out a bit, something about watching a movie in Annie's in home movie theater.

"-No that's bullshit, I know for a fact that you pissed your pants in the second grade Eren!" your eyebrows shot into your hairline at the words leaving Annie's mouth.

"Just because I'm quiet doesn't mean I don't notice shit." She huffed as she lifted the juul in her hand to her lips and took a long drag.

"I-"

"Just take the L Eren we all remember." Bertolt shook his head and chuckled at Eren's flushed cheeks. You glanced at Mikasa, usually she would defend Eren but she seemed content to let him struggle through this one on his own, still perched on his lap.

"We've all had accidents before." Armin said with an awkward chuckle as he sat down beside Annie, who looked at him with a blank expression.

"Like that time you tripped down the stairs and broke both your legs in fourth grade?" Annie quipped, a small smirk curling onto her lips. You choked on your drink at Annie's remark, she was an absolute savage.

"Exactly..." Armin flushed, lifting his own cup to his lips. Your phone buzzed in your pocket, but you were too invested in the conversation to be bothered to pick it up.

"Want a hit?" Annie offered the bong to you, you nodded. Although you'd never had weed before, you'd tried asking Levi for some of his but he always denied you. Annie held her hand out to Bertolt who placed the lighter in his open palm. She packed some more weed into the bowl before handing you the bong.

"You ever done this before?" She asked as she kneeled in front of you. You shook your head,

"Okay so I'll tell you when to inhale, and you've got to take a huge breath so you can get the smoke in your system. But then you'll have to take another breath to get it in your lungs." she instructed as she pressed the weed deeper into the bowl.

"Okay." you agreed, she nodded and struck the lighter, holding the flame over the weed in the bowl. You pressed your lips to the mouth piece and waited for her instructions.

"Inhale." she said once the weed was lit. You sucked in a big breath and the water in the bong bubbled. The smoke burned the insides of your throat as you inhaled it, you pulled the bong off your mouth and sucked in once more to get the smoke into your lungs. She nodded in approval as you coughed, smoke curling out of your mouth.

"Not bad for your first time." she commented as she took the bong from you and passed it to Mikasa who took a long drag before passing it to Bertolt.

"Thanks, that stuff burns." you coughed, Annie sat down next to you on the couch and draped her arm over the back. You felt the buzz from the weed and the shots you'd taken earlier, making your head spin a bit. Annie's thigh brushed against your own, you tried to focus on what she was wearing, a pair of grey sweats and a cute cropped peachy colored tank top with spaghetti straps.

"I like your top." you complimented, her hand fell from the back of the couch to your shoulders.

"Thanks." she said, turning to gauge your reaction to her touch. You swallowed a bit nervously, you'd known Annie since kindergarten, but you'd never really been friends before, she was always so quiet.

"I always thought you were a good kid." Annie smirked, her eyes a bit playful.

"What made you think that?" You giggled, shuffling closer to her.

"Your brother is like the school's golden boy, and you are always in all the honors classes." she shrugged, you frowned. You were used to people coming up with these assumptions. She was right though, you did take honor classes, but that didn't mean you couldn't party!

"I guess...But that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy partying." you countered.

"I suppose." she chuckled, taking a hit from her juul and blowing the smoke away from your face. Your phone rang in your pocket and you frowned, as you dug it out of your pocket. Your frown deepened at the sight of Hange's contact lighting up your screen.

"Hang on I should take this." you apologized, moving to stand up to find a quiet place to answer the phone. Annie snatched your wrist and pulled you back down on the sofa, the room spun as you fell back down and slumped against her shoulder.

"Slow down there sweetheart." Annie chuckled as you leaned against her.

"I got to go answer my-"

"Nah just stay here, enjoy yourself." Annie pulled you closer, but your head was too foggy to protest, thoughts of your phone already fading into the back of your mind as Annie held the bong to your lips once more.

__

"She's still not answering." Hange chewed on her knuckle as she glanced at Erwin who was gripping the steering wheel. His brows were knit tightly together with worry, Levi shifted in the back seat, tapping his fingers impatiently.

"This is stupid, she can wait until tomorrow to see me." Levi huffed, trying his best to sound indifferent.

"Oh don't say that Levi." Hange frowned as she looked back at Levi, her eyes deep with worry.

"Don't worry about it." Levi grunted, turning his attention back to his phone. He opened snapchat, and scrolled through the stories. His eyes widened slightly when he stopped on Sasha's story, the video of the party played, he found himself looking for your silhouette among the swaying bodies. He tapped on his screen, expecting to move on to the next story, only to find a new video, added to her story less than ten minutes ago. A video of you with a red solo cup in one hand, and a juul in the other. You were leaned up against a blonde girl who was pushing a bottle of Pink Whitney against you, the pink alcohol sloshing in the glass.

"Come on (Y/n) finish it off!" Sasha encouraged as the other kids on the couch picked up on her chant.

"Finish it, Finish it." the crowd cheered as you sat down the cup and took the bottle from the blonde. You looked at the camera as Sasha shuffled closer.

"No pa-paparazzi please." you giggled, hiccuping half way through your sentence. You lifted the bottle to your lips and tilted your head back, the liquid spilled down your front, making your skin glisten in the colorful lights as you chugged the alcohol you managed to get in your mouth.

"Fuck yeah!!!" Sasha jeered, spinning the camera around to her face. The video ended and Levi felt his blood boil. He'd never seen you so out of it before and he hated it. He hated how easily you had given into doing something so stupid, he hated the sight of the juul in your fist, he hated the way the girl's arm was tightly wrapped around your waist, but most of all he hated that he wasn't there.

"Wait, I think Sasha's snap map is on." Hange mumbled, her phone screen casting a pale glow over her glasses as she zoomed in on Sasha's bitmoji. Sure enough Sasha's bitmoji was on the map, surrounded by at least twenty other bitmojis gathered in one location.

"Okay let's head that way then." Erwin sighed as he started the car and backed out of his parking spot in the airport parking lot. Erwin pulled out of the small airport that was about thirty minutes away from your town and set off towards Annie's house. Thankfully Annie lived on the outskirts of town so it wasn't as far of a drive. It wasn't long before Erwin was pulling up a long winding drive that was full of cars. He parked at the back of the line of cars and got out of the car with a heavy slam of his door. Levi slammed the back door of the minivan as hard as he could, the two of them marched up the driveway silently with Hange following nervously.

"You guys please slow down it's icy out here." Hange begged as she slipped on one of the steps to the side door. The three of them piled into the house, Hange knew it was bad when Levi didn't bother to kick his shoes off before continuing towards the basement steps. Erwin stormed down the steps, the music getting louder as they descended. Erwin paused at the bottom of the steps to take in the scene, cups littered the floor, the room was hazy with smoke from juuls and the scent of weed clung to the air. A group of partygoers was crowded onto the couch, Levi's eyes narrowed onto the back of your head.

"Yoooo that's ice cold." Eren's loud voice could be heard over the music as the teens passed the bong between one another.

"No it's the truth." you slurred, the empty bottle of alcohol still in your fist.

"Well sorryyy that I forgot that I had gum in my mouth." Connie said, waving his hands in front of his face.

"You're an idiot." Sasha laughed boisterously as she shoved a handful of pretzels into her mouth.

"damn straight." Annie agreed, taking the empty bottle from you and setting it on the coffee table. Erwin stalked across the room and stood behind Bertolt, who was now on the floor. The conversation came to a halt at the sight of the uninvited guests.

"Woah I think I'm seeing things." you said, tilting your head downwards as you tried to understand why you were seeing your brother.

"Me too." Reiner agreed, his own distant gaze honing in on his team captain.

"Get up we're going home." Erwin's voice was cold and commanding as he glowered at you.

"I don't wanna leave." your eyes hardened with denial. Erwin stepped over Bertolt, once he had moved your eyes landed on Levi, who was glaring at you with those dark eyes.

"I'm definitely seeing things." you grunted as Erwin pulled you off the couch and away from Annie's warmth.

"Hey man she said she didn't want to go." Annie snarled, jumping to her feet, her icy blue eyes sharp.

"Yeah well she's drunk as shit and doesn't know what she's saying." Levi snapped back at Annie, who had a hand clamped down around your arm. Hange shifted nervously behind the couch as she watched the scene unfold.

"You need to leave." Annie growled, pointing a finger at the stairs.

"That's what we're trying to do dumb ass." Levi growled, taking a step closer to the circle of teens.

"Leave her alone she can make her own decisions." Reiner quipped, rising to his own feet.

"Stay out of this Braun." Erwin ordered, releasing you so he could turn and face Reiner.

"I'm just saying, she chose to come here on her own and she's enjoying herself so let her be." Reiner shrugged.

"She's had enough tonight." Erwin countered, shifting his gaze back to you as you swayed on your feet.

"No I haven't" you frowned up at Erwin.

"Yes you have. We're leaving end of discussion." he said with finality, once more reaching for your wrist.

"I'm not leaving Erwin." you protested, pulling yourself free from his grasp. He snatched your wrist once more and tugged you away from the circle. You gasped and stumbled after him, the protests of your friends echoing loudly in your head. Erwin hauled you up the stairs and out the side door, Levi and Hange close on your heels. He only slowed once you were walking down the driveway. You wrenched yourself free once more with a strangled cry.

"I said I don't want to leave!" you screamed, a few tears sliding down your cheeks.

"You always embarrass me in front of my friends just give me this one night!" you cried, the cold air making your face beet red.

"You'll thank me later." He said simply before turning to continue down the driveway.

"No I won't I'm going back inside." you turned on your heel and marched back towards the door, only for Levi to catch your wrist.

"You've had enough for one night." He scolded as you struggled against his hold. Hange chewed on her bottom lip with worry at the sight, this was not how she planned your reunion.

"Levi let me go." you said with finality as you met his eyes.

"No, you're going home." Levi's voice was tense.

"No I'm not."

"(Y/n) you're going home and that's final." Erwin sighed, running a hand down the side of his face. You spun around and glared at him.

"You're not my fucking dad Erwin so quit acting like it! Jesus it's so annoying I'm tired of it!" you screamed, your chest heaving with frustration, your breath coming out with puffs of vapor. Hange and Levi stood deathly still, knowing that the topic of your father was a sensitive one.

"Fine be that way." Erwin snarled and marched to the van and climbed in with a slam of his door. Hange rushed to get in the car without a second glance over her shoulder. Levi remained firmly rooted to the ground, his hand still wrapped firmly around your wrist as you cried.

"Get out of here Levi." you sobbed, shaking your arm to throw his hand off. He finally let you go, his head tilted down to the ground. You huffed, wrapping your arms around your chest before turning on your heel and stalking back towards the house. Levi stood there a moment longer just listening to the sound of your receding footsteps before he padded back to Erwin's car and slid into the backseat.

__

Your head was spinning as you pressed your back against the bathroom door, your lip quivering as you tried to contain your tears. You knew that you'd hurt both Erwin's and Levi's feelings, you also knew that they were only trying to help you. But there was only so much help you could except from them without them toeing the line between helpful and overbearing. You slid down the door with a whimper, you hugged you knees to your chest and rested your chin on top of them. A knock startled you out of your moping,

"(Y/n)? You in there?" You groaned when you recognize Jean's voice.

"Open the door please." He said softly and you felt more tears fall down your cheeks as you reached up for the knob to unlock the door. The lock clicked and you shuffled to lean agains the wall so he could open the door.

"Hey" he said as he stuck his head in, his amber eyes soft with worry.

"Hey" you sniffled, turning your head up to meet his gaze.

"What's wrong?" He asked, slipping into the small bathroom and closing the door behind him. He crouched down in front of you, his elbows propped on his own knees as he got onto your level.

"Well for starters, you kissed someone else when we were talking." you said a bit venomously. He cringed and plopped down to sit criss cross applesauce instead.

"I'm sorry I know that I shouldn't have done that but, I've been really confused....like sexually I guess." He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and your frowned.

"I know, but it still hurt my feelings." you mumbled, a few fresh tears falling from your watery eyes.

"I shouldn't have led you on like that, it was a real jerk move." Jean agreed, his eyes still soft and comforting. You'd missed being his friend you realized as you sat on the cold tile.

"I've missed talking to you." you spoke your mind, managing a small smile.

"Me too, let's be friends again?" he proposed, offering his hand to you. Your smile grew wider as you extended your own hand to grasp his. You shook hands briefly.

"So are you and Marco a couple now?" you asked.

"Sort of.." Jean chuckled.

"You want to go back to the party now?" He asked, jutting a thumb towards the door. You nodded, although now you were beginning to sober up. He stood and offered his hands to help you to your feet. You accepted his hands and he pulled you to your feet. The two of you walked slowly down the steps to rejoin the circle of teens in the living room. Jean stopped at the bottom of the stairs his hand held loosely in your own. He squeezed your hand, asking for your attention. You turned and faced him, a questioning look on your face.

"You've got some-" He chuckled, lifting his thumb to his mouth and licking it before wiping away some rogue mascara off your cheeks. You gasped in mock offense as he wiped away the makeup.

"You're not my mom." you teased, pulling your face free as you turned to head back into the fray, trusting that Jean got all the black marks off your face.

"Nobody could replace Angie." Jean agreed as he followed you into the basement. The group of previously rowdy teens was now subdued due to your brother and his meddling party crasher friends.

"Hey look who's back!" Reiner greeted, causing all the heads to turn back to you. You smiled sheepishly and dropped back into your seat next to Annie.

"You alright?" She asked, her eyes scanning you meticulously for any signs of injury.

"Yeah I'm- I'll be alright." you stumbled over your words as the group watched you carefully.

"You want a uh beer or something?" Connie asked, lifting up an unopened can.

"No she doesn't you idiot!" Sasha snapped, elbowing Connie harshly.

"Ow well I was just trying to make her feel better!" Connie cried, turning to tackle Sasha. The two began to tussle, rolling around on the floor grunting as they struggled. You smiled, the pair never failed to make you happy. Annie draped her arm over you again as the boys began to place bets on who would come out victorious.

"If Sasha wins you've got to drink one of Connie's mixed drinks!" Eren said, leaning over to Bertolt who scoffed, his boyish features contorting with disgust. Connie was known for making the worst mixed drinks.

"You're on Jeager." he reached over Reiner and the two shook in agreement before turning their attention to the scuffle.

"Come on Sasha!" Eren jeered as Sasha bit down hard on Connie's hand. The boy yelped and tried to desperately pry her locked jaws off his hand. He gave up quickly and resorted to hitting her head with his closed fist, his face wild with panic.

"Tickle her neck" Mikasa suggested as she lifted a red solo cup to her lips. Your eyes widened in surprise, Mikasa usually kept quiet during these scuffles, unless of course it was Eren being thrown around. Connie's free hand flew down to Sasha's armpit and immediately Sasha released his other hand to roll away from him. Connie regained the upper hand, pinning Sasha beneath him as he tickled her ruthlessly. Jean groaned and slapped a wad of bills into Reiner's open palm as Sasha slapped the ground in defeat. Connie threw his hands into the air and rolled off Sasha who was fighting for breath.

"Traitor" she moaned, her brown eyes glaring at Mikasa who shrugged indifferently. Eren groaned and frowned at Mikasa.

"Why'd you do that?" He asked as Bertolt looked relieved. Mikasa shrugged once more a sly smile on her face as Eren pushed her off his lap.

"So" Connie jumped to his feet and clapped his hands together.

"About that drink." he turned and strutted over to the mini bar, followed by a sulking Eren and a smug Bertolt. You turned to Sasha who was now straddling Mikasa her hands around Mikasa's shoulders as she jostled the girl.

"Come on Mikasa why'd you sell me out like that?" she whined as she shook the girl, Mikasa's drink sloshing in her cup. Mikasa smiled as her eyes drifted to the group of boys, Connie had a large bottle of Tito's and a two liter of Mt. Dew in his hands as he inspected the two, his face scrunched up with concentration.

"Come on Sasha it's not like you wouldn't do the same if it were me." Mikasa scoffed with a roll of her eyes. You snorted at Mikasa's response, knowing that she was indeed correct. Sasha gasped and shook Mikasa harder.

"I would never do that to you! Besides you would win in any fight you fought." Sasha objected, leaning back on Mikasa's lap her arms extended.

"Psh whatever." Annie scoffed, a playful smirk on her lips.

"Not all of us are masters at kickboxing." Sasha pouted as she climbed off Mikasa's lap and dropped onto the empty space next to her. You knew that Mikasa had participated in the sport for the past few years, but you were confused when Sasha looked between Annie and Mikasa.

"What you didn't know?" Annie asked with a smirk. You shook your head,

"No I guess I don't know." you laughed as Annie licked her lips and she threw her arm back over your shoulders.

"Mikasa and I are on the same kickboxing club." She shrugged as you settled back into her side. Your mouth opened into an 'o' shape in realization as Annie dug her juul out of her pocket and took a hit. Mikasa nodded in agreement, her eyes shifting back over to the boys, who were laughing loudly as Eren chugged a cup of mystery liquid.

"Really? I had no idea." you said as you followed Mikasa's gaze. Eren was now leaned over gagging as Armin patted his back with a worried expression.

"-You dodged a bullet there!" Reiner quipped as he patted Bertolt's back as the tall boy watched with a disgusted face.

"Hey where did Ymir and Krista run off to?" Sasha asked, whipping her head around to look for the pair.

"Probably making out in some corner." Reiner scoffed as he dropped back onto the sofa, the rest of the boys rejoining the group as well. You nodded in agreement, it was no secret that the pair had been seeing each other recently.

"Guess so." Sasha sighed, slumping back into the sofa, throwing a glare at Connie who was now seated next to her with an arm over the back of the couch. Eren and Armin were the only once unaccounted for, you assumed that they had fled to the bathroom given the state Eren had been in after drinking Connie's concoction. Jean had managed to slip away with all the commotion, probably to return to Marco. Annie sighed, glancing at her phone with a frown, it was well past three at this point and you were starting to feel the fatigue.

"Well I think that I'm heading off to bed." Annie yawned, the others seemed to be mellowing out as well.

"You guys can crash here or my brother's room is open as well as my sisters rooms." She said as she stood up. You immediately missed her warmth as she lingered by the couch.

"I call Eric's room!" Sasha perked up, also standing up to run towards Annie's younger brother's room.

"No fair!" Connie yelled, giving chase. Mikasa sighed and stood up as well.

"I'd better go check on Eren and Armin." She mumbled as she stalked off towards the bathroom.

"Are you staying the night then?" Annie asked you as you also stood up, not sure if you should go after Mikasa.

"I'm not sure, Mikasa was going to take me back to her place..."

"You can sleep in my room with me." She offered, tilting her head towards the stairs. You bit your lip as you weighed your options. Mikasa had been drinking and smoking and you knew that she wasn't stupid enough to drive so you figured that you weren't leaving any more.

"We'll sleep in Sarah's room." Reiner said as he and Bertolt began to retreat up the stairs. Leaving just you and Annie in the basement living room, she raised a brow as she waited for your answer.

"No pressure." She said as she began to walk towards the stairs.

"Yeah I'll sleep with you." you blurted as you jogged to catch up to Annie. She smirked at your wording and you flushed.

"Not like that!" you slapped her arm as she led the way up to the top floor which was a maze of closed doors. She slipped into one of the closed doors, into a large bedroom with a queen sized bed in the center of the room. She emptied her pockets before climbing into bed, pulling the covers back for the both of you. You slid into the open side and sat your phone on the bedside table. Annie sighed with relief as she nestled into the covers, scrolling through her phone as you closed your eyes in an attempt to sleep. After a few minutes Annie put her phone down and rolled over, now her front was facing your back.

"You awake?" She whispered, you rolled over to face her as well.

"Yeah" you answered, resting your head on your arm as you focused on her features as best as you could in the dim lighting.

"You wanna make out?" she asked, your eyes widened in shock. You weren't sure if she was being serious or not.

"For real?" you blinked rapidly as Annie shuffled closer and pushed a lock of hair out of your face.

"I mean yeah." she huffed a shy smile on her face. You pursed your lips in thought, you had never kissed a girl before, and it wasn't like the thought of doing so had never crossed your mind. You shrugged and leaned slightly into her touch.

"Yes or no." She said as she propped herself up on her elbow so she was looking down on you.

"Sure." you agreed, she leaned down as soon as the words left your lips. Her lips were so soft compared to the boys that you'd kissed in the past. Her hand that had been in your hair now traced over your cheek bones as she licked your bottom lip. You opened your mouth for her to slip her tongue in, the taste of weed and pink whitney mingling on her breath. You met her tongue a bit timidly as she licked your bottom teeth. She pulled back after a moment to readjust herself so that she was now laying down on top of you, caging you in her arms as she leaned down to kiss your chin.

"You're so cute." she mused, her lips pressed against the corner of your mouth.

"You're really pretty" you breathed as her lips hovered over your own once more before connecting her lips with yours once more.

[docholligay]

Hi Doc! I'm looking to buy a nice wine to celebrate with tonight and I've got about $100 set aside for it. Is that enough to buy a good wine with, or should I splurge a little more? I'm not necessarily looking for a high alcohol content, but I'm not afraid of that either; I'm looking for something that tastes lovely and goes well with fish. Do you have any recommendations?

Wine Anon: Ok so I consulted my co-celebrator and here are some answers!

I thought we were doing a fancy dinner but we're getting a bunch of sushi with some appetizers (edamame, maybe some oysters.) We aren't doing dessert with dinner tonight. We are eventually going to do a 3 course dinner with dessert, and we will be getting several bottles so I'll def have to come back to you for that!

I'm very new to wine, I know that I like rosé and some sweet whites? The last white that I got that I liked was a pear wine from Olive Garden (I know, I am the Haruka of my relationship.) It was actually the wine that convinced me to not give up on trying new wines! I think I'd only had a few up until then and they were dreadful. I think I don't like dry?

Wine comments from my so: dry, woody, not sweet, not leggy, anything he can taste the tannins in is a no-go so no reds? He favors white but he won't say no to a good rosé. His first wine love was a 5y Sauvignon Blanc he had at a some fancy rich dude's party when he was 17 so he can't recall the name haha. He mentioned New Zealand and Chilean wines were good.

If it comes down to it, I don't mind getting a good bottle heavily favoring his tastes (we're doing this for him) but if you can think of 2 bottles that we'd both separately like, I wouldn't mind that either.

Thank you so much for your help!

First of all, congrats to your mancandy for knowing the difference between tannic and dry. There's a huge misconception that dry means tannic, and they're totally different things. I assume it's because tannins have a sort of dryish feel in the mouth. Anyhow, I DO want to argue the fact that reds are exclusively tannic--there are plenty of low tannin reds--but that's another post, as red wouldn't really go with what you were eating unless we were really trying to make it stretch.

Secondly, all of this assumes that you have no interest whatsoever in sake. I LOVE sake, and it's my always go to for sushi, and my frequent go-to for light fish dishes in general. But it's not super accessible, and some (wrong) people flat do not like it.

Thirdly THANK YOU SO MUCH for just giving me a goddamn number!! My least favorite word on EARTH is "affordable." It's meaningless. Just tell me your number! I may not be able to HELP you, but I won't JUDGE you. For anything you need help finding. So bless you, and it was a MAJOR reason I decided to answer this. Whites tend to be cheaper (unless they are Champagne) for a wide variety of reasons, so I don’t think MUCH on this list will hit about 35-40. 

A note: Unless something is WIDELY available commercially, I just recommend TYPES of wine. I would go into your local wine store and ask for these varietals, depending on which one you choose. They may even be able to help select one to go with fish!

So for him, I DO recommend a Sauvignon Blanc, or another high acid wine. The fish used in sushi is mostly fatty and rich, for fish, and these high acid wines give a real element of freshness and even slightly of salt.

You want to know one of my favorite SBs? It's actually something you can get at the goddamn COSTCO, Kim Crawford SB. I don't know if I would call it an OCCASION wine, depending on how we think of things, but it is special enough to be a Shabbat wine in my family, I think you can get it in most grocery stores, and it never disappoints.

If you want SB, but not though, I'd go with a Fume Blanc, which is one of my favorite wines no one seems to know. Fume Blanc is SB, honestly, but made in the US, and pretty much always highly oaky and dry. I love it, but I love that oak shit. Fume Blanc is hard to find nowadays, because of declining knowledge of the name, winemakers are just labeling stuff " Sauvignon Blanc" which, yeah, it's the same grape, but I like to know which SBs have seen some oak, you know? Anyway, I like the rich oakiness paired with salmon rolls especially!

If you want to go with something TOTALLY different that I think he'd like, I think that a Muscadet is going to have a lot of those same flavors while giving him something different. It's BONE DRY, and the acids from it are going to give a lot of those same pleasant associations as SB. A good Muscadet is probably the most expensive thing on this list. 

My favorite budget sushi wine, period, is Ovum Big Salt. You are not looking for budget wine, but if you ever are like me and eating buy one get one half off rolls while reading a book, I love Big Salt. It's a Riesling-Gewurztraminer (Somehow I doubt I spelt that second one correctly) blend that legitimately has strong salt overtones. It's also great with coconut shrimp. (Come to think of it, dry Riesling would be a good pairing with this, too)

For you!

Sweeter wines are tougher to pair with sushi than his tastes, but that shouldn't say at all that it's impossible! If you like something labeled pear wine at the Olive Garden (ahahahaha I'm sorry but ahahaha) the wines you like are probably not just sweet in a WINE sense, but probably TRULY sweet.

So I'm going to push you a little bit! These are sweet in the wine category, or if you’re the sort of person who doesn’t eat a lot of sugar, but they aren’t like...fucking moscato or something. A bit more refined, a bit more elegant, and a good way to move into developing your palate, while not being OVERTLY challenging for a newbie. 

My wife is at times (often) a Haruka Lite, just one calorie, and moving her to a better and wider palate, I’ve had a lot of luck with bubbles. I think because they are widely fun in their own right, and give another quality to what might otherwise be a too-straight-on glass of wine, so that’s the direction I went here.

Prosecco, specifically a demi-sec. Demi-sec is the sweetest variety of prosecco, and I confess I give this to you more to try and put you on the path of expanding your wine palate than as a specific pairing--like I said, sweets are hard--and you’ll almost certainly need to go to a wine shop to find a version that is both demi-sec and GOOD, which is doable but not easily accessible*.

Now if you want something I ACTUALLY think goes with sushi, I recommend Cremant. Cremant is champagne, made in France, not made IN Champagne. It’s the same shit. It offers a lot of the complexity and delight of Champagne without the cost (Champagne is ALSO a lovely choice! But I generally recommend that if you’re both drinking the same bottle.) I think it’s one of the greatest secrets of the wine world--it’s not like the French terroir outside of Champagne sucks. You will almost certainly have to get this in a wine shop, as it’s not well known by people casually (which is a goddamn shame) in America--the UK tends to have a wider range of them.

I L O V E Cremant. Love. A favorite bubbly. Maybe my favorite, actually? I mean I love Chapagne but like, I have a baby and a mortgage and a budget.  And Champagne goes great with sushi! Cremant is, I find, a little less intense than Champagne, which I think will be really good for you as a “beginner” and also the price point tends to be SO APPROACHABLE. Anyway on this one I actually DO have a couple brand recs, because this a thing I drink A LOT, and I’m going to break my ruling about not reccing certain brands ahaha. 

J. Laurens Cremant de Limoux --I think this bottle is like 20 bucks locally? It IS more Brut (dry) but I still think it’s really nice, with a citrusy quality that pairs really good with richer fish

Kuentz-Bas Cremant d'Alsace-- I fucking love this bottle. It’s 25, I think, bucks, at my local wine shop. It’s almost...creamy? I know that sounds insane but I can’t think of a better word. I love Alsatian wine in general though. This is a really nice, light wine that I think pairs with TONS of stuff, and would be good with a wide variety of sushi styles. 

I had a really amazing Rosé Cremant years ago that had a quality of sweetness to it, but I bought it in a goddamn Tesco in London and so I DOUBT you can find it here. I have it written down in my travel journal though, I think. 

ANYWAY I HOPE THIS HELPS SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG. 

*This puts me in mind of the One Good Moscato I have ever had, at Alinea (in and of it itself one of the highlights of my life) where it was still too sweet for me personally, but I could recognize the complexity and mastery in the glass. I was shit shocked. Someone remind me to ask @keyofjetwolf what it was, I think she wrote it down, and as I recall it was not a spendy bottle, even. 

[solasan]

96 + june & adam 👀

angst/fluff prompt list

96 — “can’t you stay a little longer?”, late book 2

The Agency’s medical facilities have a lot going for them, obviously, being super-secret government-run places that cater almost exclusively to the equally-super-secret supernatural patrons of the world. The law of super-secret government agencies says that they have to be pretty well put-together, y’know? Captain America wasn’t made in, like, a garage. Iron Man doesn’t get treated in a public hospital. Batman never got himself stitched up in the parking lot of a Denny’s, or anything.

So, yeah, they’re top-notch. Grade A, or whatever. But they’re still indentured to the general rule of all hospitals and hospital-adjacent facilities worldwide, so— like, the food fucking sucks.

Which wouldn’t be a problem, normally. Except that Adam’s still laid-up from what the Trappers did to him — which June is still very carefully Not-Thinking about, because she’s very good at Not-Thinking about these kinds of things — and she’s obviously not about to, like, leave him, or whatever, even if he did have to be moved to the main Facility to be monitored. Which means, y’know. She’s stuck with shitty food.

Today’s fare had been a choice between soggy salad or soggy casserole, and June’s not a rabbit, thank you, so casserole it is.

Or— probably casserole it is. She’s not, like, actually sure? It’s kinda stodgy and stiff, and she’s pretty sure casseroles aren’t supposed to be like that, but then what would she know? She hasn’t had casserole since the week after Dad’s funeral, when it was all they ate, ‘cause Rebecca couldn’t get out of bed to cook.

She heaves a sigh, shakes her head, and knocks on Adam’s door. Only obviously, Adam isn’t the one to open it.

Elidor’s lips are twitching, but there’s a stern line to his brow when he looks at her that really isn’t encouraging. “He’s sleeping, June. Go back to the cafeteria.”

“Ugh, I can’t. It’s too quiet.”

“It’s quiet in here, too. He needs his rest.”

“I know.” June grins up at him, batting her big brown eyes that way she’d perfected by the time that she was twelve and Miss Lewis caught her carving binary translations of swear words into the underside of her desk. “Look, I’ll be real good, okay, I promise. And c’mon, who’s gonna know?”

“I’ll know.”

“Yeah, yeah, you will... But! We’re friends, Elidor. Right?”

He stares down at her for several very long moments, blinking slowly like she’s a special kind of idiot — which, ouch, she has an IQ of 163, thanks— before he sighs. Only after giving a careful look over his shoulder does he say, “you promise to be quiet, June?”

June mimes locking up her lips, then throwing away the key.

The corners of Elidor’s mouth jerk, and she grins triumphantly, her smile only growing when he sighs and opens the door wider. “I’m going to be making the rounds, but I’ll be back in an hour. Behave, alright? He’ll never get out of here if you and your team don’t let him heal.”

Which officially has her mood plummeting, but alright. She nods, face as solemn as can be, and with one last careful look, Elidor lets her through and leaves, shutting the door quietly behind him.

The room is pretty small, when she steps into it. Cold, too. Doesn’t Adam mind? Or do vampires not get cold? She’ll have to ask — probably not now, though. Nate usually answers her questions… he might not mind.

The floors are some kinda fake-wood linoleum, and they squeak under her sneakers as she crosses the space to settle in the plastic chair set up by the side of Adam’s bed. There’s a dog-eared copy of Wuthering Heights and a mostly-empty mug of tea on his bedside table, so Nate was probably the last one in here. Hopefully he also doesn’t mind her taking his space.

Bed doesn’t look comfortable, she thinks, wrinkling her nose at the thin-looking sheets by Adam’s feet. How’s he not going totally crazy?

Because he did go a little crazy when they told him they’d be moving him. To keep an eye on you, Elidor had said, and you’d have thought someone had shot Adam, the way he reacted.

Well, no. June has shot Adam, and he, like, barely reacted at the time, so...

Still. You get it.

She has to inhale carefully and clench her jaw before she can force herself to look at his face. He’s less fucked up than he was, at least; vampire healing’s nothing to sniff at. But one of his eyes is still a little swollen, his cheekbone the lurid yellow of a mostly-healed bruise, and her chest twinges at the sight.

Stupid. She’s really fucking stupid. Especially since this is, like, at least fifty percent her fault.

But that’s not a thought she likes to linger on, really, so June does what June always does: she pushes it away, swallows, and bottles it up somewhere it’ll never see the light of day.

The casserole is just as disappointing as it’d looked, and she pokes at it disinterestedly, nose wrinkled, daydreaming idly about the Chinese place around the corner from her apartment, chicken chow mein and dumplings steaming on the tongue. 

As soon as Adam’s healed up, she’s heading back to her place and absolutely splurging on as much takeout as she can carry. No one can say shit about it, either, because she’s going actually batshit as things are, and if they do, she might just hit them.

After a little while more of pushing about mushrooms and what might be beef with her fork, she gives it up as a lost cause and drops the bowl on Adam’s bedside table, swiping up Nate’s book with her other hand and rearranging herself on the rickety plastic chair so that her feet are on the seat, knees drawn up to her chest.

Only it turns out Wuthering Heights is, like, super fucking depressing. Like, seriously? This is the kinda stuff Nate reads? He’s so… not happy-go-lucky, but nice. Serious, for sure, but not depressed.

Probably.

Well.

Okay. She can’t actually pass judgement on that, since she’s been carefully-cultivating herself so that no one would guess at the bottles of zoloft in her medicine cabinet since she was, like, seventeen, but still. It’s a surprise, kinda.

Her cheeks puff out as she exhales, blowing a raspberry that’d shame any toddler, before resettling herself in the chair again. Maybe she’s just not comfortable enough?

“Bad book?” 

“Jesus!”

Her and the chair very nearly become intimately acquainted with the floor, and it’s only by mercy of her quick thinking that she manages to hook her hands onto the foot of the bed, steadying the seat before she can embarrass herself even more.

And— did Adam just laugh?

June blinks at him owlishly, taking in his sleep-mussed hair, his hazy green eyes, the ever-so-faint quirk of his lips. He— that might have been a laugh. A very, very quiet one, but—

She grins, positively fucking buoyant. If someone tossed her into a river right now, not only would she float, she’d fly. “How long have you been awake, asshole?”

He pulls a face that she’s never seen before, nose scrunching up beautifully, and Jesus Christ, what she’d give for a camera right now. “I do not know. Not long.”

“Not long,” she repeats. Then, leaning in conspiratorially, she whispers: “Were you spying on me?”

“No!” he half-yelps, his eyes green and wide and green. “I would— I would never do such a thing.”

June laughs, her heart doing something funny behind her ribs. “Alright, old man, chill. I was kidding.”

“Yes, well I was— not. Kidding.” He purses his lips, eyes narrowing as he seems to run over that sentence in his head, and then he sighs. “At any rate, you did not seem to be enjoying it.”

“Enjoying it?”

“The book.”

“Oh! Right. The book.” She clears her throat. Seriously, he is way too distracting. “Weeeeeell. I know it’s high-brow reading, but — and don’t tell Nate I said this — it’s a little boring.”

His face contorts into a vague approximation of his usual frown, and he goes a little cross-eyed as he squints at the cover. “Wuthering Heights is not boring.”

“Oh, so you’ve read it? Wait, that’s a dumb question, of course you have. You’re a trillion years old.”

He huffs through his nose in that maybe-laugh way again. “Not a trillion.”

“Basically a trillion.” She tilts her head at him, setting the book down where it was. “You doing okay?”

“Hm. I would be doing much better if they would let me out of this bed.”

“Well, no, you’d probably be doing much worse. Let the medical professionals do their jobs, idiot.”

Adam scowls properly then, but it didn’t exactly intimidate her when he was upright and unhurt, so it definitely doesn’t intimidate her now. He’s kinda like a pissy kitten, she thinks, eyeing his messy hair and trying not to laugh. A puffed up, super pissed, super adorable little six-foot-something kitty.

“Why are you smiling at me like that?” he grumbles, eyes locked on a spot somewhere over her left shoulder.

“Like what?”

“Like that,” he says expansively, jerking his hand in the rough direction of her face.

“‘Cause that explains everything. Man, how much DMB do they have you on?”

“Don’t change the subject.”

She laughs properly then, and his gaze snaps back to her all at once, the line between his eyebrows smoothing out as his whole face softens. “Aren’t people supposed to be less grumpy on painkillers? Like, I’ve seen the wisdom teeth videos. Aren’t you supposed to be all dopey and nice?”

Adam blinks at her for several very long moments. “I do not have wisdom teeth.”

“What, seriously?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Like, at all?”

“At all,” he agrees with sickening pride, jaw cracking around a yawn.

“Damn,” June sighs. “You’re so lucky. I had wisdom teeth, right, but I had to get them removed when I was nineteen. I think I’ve still got the video from after somewhere— God, okay, I have to delete that before Farah ever finds out.” Straightening in her seat, she points a finger at him, giggling when his eyes cross as he tries to focus on it. “Don’t. Tell her, okay?”

“Alright,” he says readily, narrowing his eyes at her finger. “I will not tell her. What am I not telling her?”

“Precisely.”

Adam frowns. “What?”

The door clicks open before she can respond, and she blinks innocently up at Elidor, who’s already sighing.

“June, you said you would let him sleep.”

“I did. I did say that. And I did also let him sleep— he woke up on his own, Scout’s honour.”

“You were a Scout?” Adam asks.

“Uh— technically? No.”

And— and at that, Adam laughs. It’s such a cute little laugh, too, a slightly-dazed little snorting giggle, and whatever she was about to say next literally does not matter, the whole world does not matter, because that is, officially, the best sound June has ever heard. Her heart tries to throw itself out through her sternum and into his hands, and she doesn’t even blame it, because holy shit. How has she been living her whole life not knowing he could laugh like that? Jesus fucking Christ.

Elidor snorts. “Okay, while this is all very sweet and everything, you,” and here he gestures to Adam, “need to rest, and you,” he points at June, “need to let him rest.”

“Uh—” June swallows, clears her throat. “Right. Yeah.”

So sue her, she’s still a little wrapped up in the way Adam had laughed. It’s very fucking understandable, in her opinion.

Adam frowns, hand reaching out clumsily to catch with hers, and this time her heart is trying to worm its way up through her esophagus, she swears to God. “Can you not stay a little longer?”

Her brain has… broken, a little bit, perhaps. Which is why it’s probably for the best that Elidor sweeps in, shaking his head. “I’m afraid she can’t, Agent du Mortain.”

He grumbles.

“Look, I’ll be back, okay?” June offers when her tongue decides to work again, swallowing thickly around the heart she can still feel beating in her throat. “Right, Elidor?”

Elidor sighs, eyeing the two of them and their hands, which are — somehow — still joined. “If I say yes, will you be good about leaving?”

“Absolutely.”

“Alright, then. She’ll be back, Agent du Mortain.”

She squeezes his palm with her fingers, and Adam finally relents with a sigh. “Alright, then. Goodbye, June.”

[theglobetrottergp-blog]

Sometimes I refer to myself as a ‘hopeless girl’ as I STILL haven’t mastered the art of nail varnish OR walking in heels and my hair is pretty much always just straight or in a pony tail (I’ve now added curly to my repertoire!) That said, I still often get described as girly. I love make-up and wearing pretty clothes and I have way more shoes than anyone needs – albeit nothing with more than a 2.5 inch heel! I’ve made the mistake of backpacking before with ONLY practical clothes and spent the whole time wishing I’d packed some mascara and a pair of nice sandals. Seriously NO ONE can rock the trekker sandals and whilst they certainly have a place in your backpack, I don’t recommend wearing them every day or suffer the tan marks! I swear I still had a faint brown square on my feet the following summer! (It seems the only part of me ever to tan is my feet!) So with that in mind, I am certainly no beauty expert but I have picked up some tips along the way which I’d love to share with you!

  Let’s talk Make-up! 

I’m certainly not one of those girls who can’t nip to the corner shop without a full face of make-up but I don’t think I could go a few months without any at all so I compromise and take the essentials when I travel. I would recommend taking neutral colours that go with all your outfits and also avoid anything in powder form – it probably won’t last past the first flight and you will regret it when your backpack is covered in bronzer! Always look for make-up with SPF in it – 2 birds 1 stone! But most importantly you want make-up that stays put even in the most humid of conditions! I have spent the last 15 years or so searching for make-up with staying power and I’m happy to say I’ve had some break throughs recently and so I’ll let you in on these secrets now!

Foundation – AT LAST I’ve found a foundation which actually lasts all day. I’ve even fallen asleep in it before (beauty sin 101) and woke up looking like I’d just done my make-up! Thanks to my lovely friend Lisa who gave me my first Estee Lauder Double wear foundation for my birthday!  It’s not cheap at £32 but it’s worth every penny and though it’s a small bottle, I was impressed it lasted almost 4 months! It’s also probably the best colour match I’ve ever had which is no mean feat given how pasty I am! I really cannot rave about this enough! The only downside that I can see is that it’s only SPF 10.

Mascara – I absolutely LOVE Clinique’s High impact curling mascara. It does exactly what it says on the tin but also for travelling, you will need a reliably waterproof mascara. This isn’t branded as waterproof but trust me it is definately is! I was lucky to inherit long eyelashes but this is both a blessing and a curse. In the past I always found that pretty much any mascara left me with panda eyes at the end of the day but not this one!

Eyebrow pencil – Being a blonde, I’ve got fair eyebrows that you can barely see and so I’ve always been on the search for a solution which looks natural and not drawn on. My solution is Benefit’s ‘Gimme Brow.” It tames your existing eyebrow hairs whilst adding subtle microfibres giving you a fuller more defined look – I’m a massive fan!

Lippy – There has been a huge improvement in the staying power of lippies and lip glosses recently but I’m a big fan of Rimmel’s Provocalpse which is marketed as lasting 16 hours. I actually think it’s longer and sometimes I actually struggle to get it off without an oil based make-up remover! My best travel shade is ‘make your move‘ as it’s  a good every-day shade.

    Let’s Talk Beauty 

SPF. I’ve made the mistake of using normal sun cream on my face and the result was so many spots – I looked like I had chicken pox! So now I always use an oil free SPF for face only. I personally like No7 Protect & perfect intense advanced facial suncream with SPF 30. It’s also a bargain! Available from Boots only.

Perfume – no one likes a smelly backpacker! But you don’t want to be weighed down with a heavy perfume bottle! I nipped into Boots and asked for some samples. They are free and the perfect size to fit in your bag without weighing you down! You might have to be less fussy about which type you take but on the plus side you may discover a new perfume to love!

Realistically you’re not going to be able to stick to your full beauty regime so you will probably have to leave your toner’s, exfoliaters and face masks at home! I used to ditch most of this stuff when I travelled but your 30’s are not as kind to your skin as your 20’s so now I travel with a good moisturiser. I’ve just invested in the Number 7 protect and perfect travel kit which has moisturiser and serum in the perfect sized travel bottles which I will be taking to South America.

Face wipes These will be your best friend especially on long dusty journeys! Why not get some exfoliating face wipes (another 2 birds, 1 stone!)

Leave your favourite jewellery at home! You will be able to pick up some great bargain jewellery at markets all around the world and it’s a great momento to take home without taking up much space in your backpack!

  Let’s Talk Hair 

Argh the bane of my life! I definitely have a love-hate relationship with my hair! I’ve got long fine hair but lots of it and so me and scarves/hats do NOT get on! I tend to end up with a big matt at the back of my neck! Sexy! Not helped by years of bleaching my hair blonde and my hairdresser despairs every time I tell her how often I go swimming in chlorine! I lust after the sort of hair which dries smooth and without frizz falling into silky waves. I have the waves but I also have frizz and LOTS of it! But I can’t be carrying around my hairdryer or straighteners in my backpack so I’m always looking for a better travel hair solution! In the past I’ve embraced the curl, cut my hair short with lots of layers and just used a bit of frizz ease. It wasn’t great but better than the Hermione-look (otherwise known as the lampshade) when my hair is longer! This time around, determined to keep my long hair,  I’m trying something different and I’ll let you know how I get on! I’m giving the Brazilian blow dry a go (not what it sounds!!) It was on offer on Groupon and I’m a sucker for a bargain! Usually about £200 it’s well out of my price range! But on groupon I found a deal for £50 which is less than I pay for a cut and colour so I figured why not?! They infuse keratin into your hair (keratin is what makes straight hair straight) which has the effect of de-frizzing and taming your curls. It’s actually designed to improve the condition of your hair unlike chemical straightening which damages it and whilst it won’t promise you poker straight hair, it is supposed to make hair much more manageable and lasts up to about 3 months. Sounds great to me! Watch this space, I will report back soon!

Embracing the curl!

  Let’s Talk Clothes

I always try to take a combination of uber practical but not-so-sexy ‘travel clothes’ and a few nicer outfits. But most importantly you need to keep the amount you take to a miminum. Trust me, you don’t want to have to carry that kitchen sink with you every day! So here you need to master the ‘capsule wardrobe.‘ Basically everything you take should match with everything else. I love patterns and colours so I stick to neutral plain shorts/skirts/trousers/cardi’s and then add a few pretty tops and dresses to jazz things up a bit. Make sure your shoes are incredibly comfy. Wear them in a LOT before you travel with them. Also don’t forget to think about things like the grip on the soles! Have you ever been wearing a pair of lovely flip-flops when suddenly the weather turns and you are slipping and sliding everywhere trying to get to the nearest shelter! Rubber soles or ones with grips are best! I have just bought a pair of UGG sandals. They are incredibly soft and cushioned but have great grip. They did cost a fortune compared to most sandals (£70 gulp) but they are an investment and I’m sure after hours walking around cities in all weathers, I will be super glad I made the splurge! For more advice about what clothes to take, see my packing list for all weathers

  Let’s Talk the ‘P’ word 

Periods. The bane of our lives – seriously men have it so much easier don’t they?!! As a doctor, I get several consultations a day from women worrying about getting their periods when they are travelling! Especially if they are camping, swimming lots or staying somewhere remote or hiking! So I thought I’d draw upon my experience as a GP and share a few ideas with you. I suggest discussing these options with your own GP if you think your ‘lady time’ might come at a BAD time!

Progestogen only pill ‘The POP.’ This contraceptive pill MIGHT just stop your period altogether! This is not an absolute given so I suggest trying it out for a few months before you go away! I would say about 70-80% of women find their periods disappear altogether though a small minority will find they get erratic periods instead. The downside to this pill when travelling, is you have to take it the same time every day (tricky when you’re crossing time zones) You have a 12 hour window with the newer versions (like Cerelle) and 3 hours with the older generation POPs. Go beyond this window and you’ll be at risk of ‘spotting’ and pregnancy if you are using it as contraception.

The Combined contraceptive pill ‘The COCP.’ This contraceptive pill is a great option. You still have a period albeit usually shorter, lighter and less painful but you will know when it’s going to be as it occurs a few days after you start your 7 day pill-break. You can choose to skip your period altogether by back-to-backing your pill packets (i.e missing your 7 day break.) This makes it a great option for shorter trips of a couple of months or less. The down sides are that it can’t be taken by any one who suffers migraines with aura (sensory disturbance) as it increases the risk of strokes. It also slightly increases your risk of DVT’s so make sure to walk about lots on flights! On the plus side, this pill has a 48 hour window so if you miss one pill but remember at the right time the next day, you will still be covered for contraception. Go beyond 48 hours and you will need extra precautions for a week!

Norethisterone – a form of POP however this is NOT contraception! Taken 3 days before your period is due then 3 times a day until you’re happy for your lady time to arrive! Great for short holidays but not really a good option for longer trips abroad!

The Progestogen only injection ‘The depot.’ Reliable contraception, you don’t need to remember to take a tablet so great for the forgetful! However occasionally women have irregular bleeding on this so try it several months before you travel just in case! Not a good option if you have risk factors for osteoporosis or if you are planning to start a family soon – this can take several months before your fertility bounces back!

Remember none of these options are completely foolproof so make sure you have some feminine hygiene products with you just in case! You don’t want to get caught out somewhere remote!!

I hope this has been helpful and given you some ideas for how to looks good, smell good and avoid having ‘lady dramas’ whilst away! Do you have any tips you can share with us ladies? Do you have any questions about the pill options I’ve discussed above? I will do my best to be able to answer them!

Let’s Talk Girl Stuff! Beauty, Hair and Health Advice for Backpackers Sometimes I refer to myself as a 'hopeless girl' as I STILL haven't mastered the art of nail varnish OR walking in heels and my hair is pretty much always just straight or in a pony tail (I've now added curly to my repertoire!) That said, I still often get described as girly.