#so while I don't feel my age at all/ever I am very grateful that I get to be 24 next year because a lot of the time I didn't think I would

[thornedswan]

My birthday isn't until March, but I am oddly looking forward to being 24

[bloom-into-blue]

ℕ𝕠𝕥 𝕒 𝕃𝕒𝕫𝕪 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖𝕣

summary: you're a single mother who verymuch wants a partner once more, and by a stroke of luck, your daughter leads you to a very special someone...

contents: fem!reader x angell, no mania au, reader had a husband before meeting angell, age gap (reader is in her early thirties, angell in her early twenties), reader is very obviously thirsty, some fluff, finge.ring, cunn.ilingus, transfem!angell

word count: 4.1k

author's note: this got so out of hand. i wanted just 1k, maybe 2k. this is my first fic in this blog and it's just showing how whipped i am for angell. good god. i am currently in my era where i wanna be a milf, so you get that this time, but maybe one day, the reader will fuck milf!garofano. maybe. also this is my first smut ever ever sooo feedback? feedback tonite queen?

things hadn't been going so well after your divorce, to say the least.

you have full custody of your daughter, yes, something you're eternally grateful for. a steady job, a nice place to call home, your beloved daughter, for all intents and purposes your life is as perfect as it gets!

but after 5 long years of marriage with an uncaring husband, one who you weren't sure you were attracted to to begin with, you find yourself feeling remarkably lonely. the touch of another, something that's been so scarce for so long, and simply knowing someone treasures you… your heart desperately longs for that. specifically, you find yourself craving a woman before a man, but as no one comes along, it's a somewhat fruitless thought.

alas, while you're a single mother, you enjoy the parenting side quite dearly.

after an uneventful shift at work and a stop by your daughter's school, you're heading back home with her holding your hand, the usual commute for the two of you for the past year or so once the divorce was finalized, though today you've taken a bit of a detour due to some construction work in your usual route. from the corner of your eye, you spot an ice cream vendor and smile to yourself; your daughter's been behaving rather well, it'd be nice to give her a treat today as a reward. “wait for me right here, alright?” you tell the little girl with a smile, then walk over to buy a popsicle for her.

barely a minute passes between leaving and coming back to your daughter, yet when you turn to face her, she's already walked away from where you left her. alarms blare in your head in less than a second, though as quickly as terror arrives, it leaves the second you spot her a few ways away, from where she calls out for you.

“mama, look! the nice lady has a kitty!”

still on edge, you approach your daughter and the woman who's crouching beside her while holding a cat. “hon, i’ve told you to not approach strangers-” you begin with a frown, though your eyes focus properly on the woman besides your daughter. her black hair with its white highlights, the leather jacket and her tank top, though it's not long enough to cover just a bit of navel that peeks out above her jeans, you can see her toned abs even as she crouches… quickly, you force your eyes to meet her golden ones, lest this stranger realize you're absolutely ogling her in broad daylight.

thankfully she doesn't notice, and if she does, she doesn't say it. instead, this stranger stands up to face you properly, making you realize just how much taller she is than you…

your daughter calling out to you curiously is what truly snaps you out of your stupor, and you nervously chuckle to yourself while handing her the popsicle you bought for her.

“s-sorry, i hope my daughter didn't inconvenience you,” you say to the unnaturally handsome woman.

she shakes her head lightly, then glances down at the cat by her feet. “don't worry, it's no trouble.”

while your daughter is delighted to be eating her ice cream, she still looks at the taller woman with a glint in her eye. “mama, can i keep playing with the lady and her kitty? pretty please?” your child begs between licks of her ice cream, and it's hard to say no to that sweet face and those puppy dog eyes. (part of you is glad she took after your side of the family entirely in the looks department)

“you can play with the kitty hon, but make sure to not bother the lady,” you warn with just a hint of firmness in your voice. with a happy cheer, your daughter goes on to pet the black cat, who doesn't seem to mind if his loud purring is any indication. the stranger before you smiles at the sight, a tiny grin at best, and you feel something in your heart throb at the sight.

…you realize you're acting like a lovesick schoolgirl as a grown woman, but you push the thought as far away as possible.

“seems he likes your kid. he's not this nice to most people,” you hear her say, which brings your attention back to the situation at hand. your gaze follows hers and you see your daughter, her popsicle partially melting in one hand while the other continues to pet the cat like he's the world's greatest treasure, and your quickly-developing crush is pushed briefly to the side, instead letting your heart focus on the adorable sight.

smiling, you nod your head. “she likes cats, though we don't have one right now.”

“hm. this one's clingy when he wants to be. usually he waits around this spot for me to come home from work.”

“oh, is that so?” mentally, you think it might be nice to take this route more often.

and that's how you first meet angell.

the more you get to know her, the more of a mess you realize she is.

the two of you chat for a few minutes at the end of each work day while your daughter plays with angell’s cat, a new addition to your peaceful routine. while you talk about your hobbies and your work sometimes, angell tells you she's a delivery worker for a well known restaurant here… but when you learn about her dietary habits, you don't know whether to pity her or be flabbergasted. it's a wonder she's a healthy and fit woman if she's always eating foods that may very well be expired by at least a month. it's quite the juxtaposition between her workplace and her actual food, which baffles you even more when you realize she's paid really well for a delivery worker.

it gets to the point where you start making lunches for all three of you, though you give angell hers at the end of each day. the first time you gave her that container with something as simple as pasta with some fried chicken on the side, yet the way she looks at you when she sees it… “for me?” she whispers with wide eyes, and you forever commit to memory the way her expression turns tender and fond and her cheeks flush. it's a herculean effort to not kiss her.

something else that's made you weak in the knees for this woman is that, much to your surprise, she starts playing with your daughter by letting her hang from her biceps and even spinning around with the child holding onto her, to your daughter's delight. it's become something that your daughter adores, and when she's laughing brightly and angell thinks you're not looking, you see the way the taller woman smiles softly at your child, only to become pink at the cheeks when she realizes you're watching her. angell is usually a rather stoic woman, so the rare sight of her being so bashful is one you realize you want to see more often.

at one point, you decide to invite her for dinner, something your daughter instantly cheers for. angell looks shocked at first, but she smiles and agrees with ease.

the three of you then walk back to your home, all while your daughter chants happily. “miss angell’s stayin’ with us! miss angell's stayin' with us!”

it's… nice. you didn't expect angell to be good with children when you first met, but this almost feels perfect.

when you arrive to your home, your daughter is quick to head back to her room to change from her school uniform, so with a fond sigh, you set your coat in the nearby rack and turn to angell with a little smile. “would you like to help me cook dinner?”

“i… i would like that,” angell replies in a low voice. this is the first time the two of you are alone together. hearing her voice like this, so smooth and deep… part of you wonders if you'll live past tonight.

angell takes off her leather jacket and puts it beside your coat, which prompts you to stare at the ground intensely in order to avoid gluing your eyes to the newly uncovered skin of her arms and shoulders, and the way her muscles move… focus, focus!

the two of you settle on making red bean soup at your suggestion, and it's a relatively easy affair with two pairs of hands working, even if angell's movements are clumsy and you gently have to guide her.

your daughter comes out of her room a few minutes later, and she's all smiles as she watches you and angell cook, though she quickly distracts herself by watching cartoons in the living room.

once more, you focus on the meal you're trying to prepare and the quiet woman you're trying not to kiss silly.

when you two are done preparing the soup, you move to grab three bowls so you all can eat while angell stirs it a bit to check its consistency. “it smells nice,” she murmurs.

“that's good to know,” you reply with a little smile, so focused on the bowls you're holding that, when you turn around, your front accidentally bumps into angell’s, and you remain close to her due to the kitchen's somewhat reduced space.

from this distance, you can see angell's golden eyes widen a fraction and her cheeks flush slightly, though your focus is more on the way her toned abs and her chest are flush against your own body, which makes your own cheeks redder than a tomato. your noses are almost brushing, and your eyes wander down to her soft lips.

“you're warm,” you hear angell muse quietly, and with a little squeak, you step back and turn away before even allowing yourself to imagine what it would be like to kiss her. faintly, you can almost hear her chuckling.

dinner is served a moment later, and soon, angell, your daughter and you sit together for a nice dinner, though the little glances you and angell exchange feel too charged to focus on anything but the taller woman.

midway through your dinner though, the sound of rumbling thunder crashes above your house, prompting your daughter to shriek fearfully and you to jump as well, while angell simply frowns. the sky had been clear during the trek to your home, but to think a storm was coming? just a few seconds later there's the sound of rain as well, slowly growing from a light drizzle into a heavy downpour. it's some hell of a background noise, something that puts your daughter on edge and makes you frown at her reaction.

angell, as always, surprises you though. “hey, it's okay. your mom and i will keep you safe from thunder,” she says with a totally straight face.

“r-really?” your daughter asks, clearly doubtful.

“yeah, really.” angell smiles at the girl and adds, “i'm strong enough to keep the two of you safe. that thunder won't come close to you, ever.”

your daughter's eyes widen at angell's confidence, and with that reassurance, she resumes eating her dinner happily. the sight, coupled with the gentle way angell reassured her, makes your heart feel light; you love seeing the two of them bond like this.

dinner happens uneventfully after that, though the rain remains as heavy as before, even when it's your daughter's bedtime. you reluctantly tell angell to wait for you in the living room while you tuck the little girl in for the night, worried about what the two of you should do now.

you refuse to let angell walk back home under the rain though.

“the storm doesn't seem to be letting up,” angell comments when you come back, her expression annoyed at the sight of the rain hitting the windows of your home.

it's then that an idea pops up in your mind, and before you can stop yourself, you open your mouth and say, “you could sleep here for the night.” hastily, you add, “i-if that's fine with you, of course.”

angells seems caught off guard at first, though her expression shifts into the smallest smile as if she were… shy? “i’d like that. better than walking under the rain.”

smiling to yourself in both relief and delight, you take angell's hand and guide her to your bedroom, realizing that her cheeks turn a slight pink when she notices where you're headed. the sight is beyond adorable and makes your smile wider.

in the bedroom, you rummage through your clothes trying to find something that angell can use as sleep wear, eventually finding an oversized sweater and a pair of loose shorts, though the sweater seems to fit angell's form just fine once she comes out of the bathroom wearing your clothes. she smiles when she notices you staring, though you quickly tear your gaze away from her form.

you take your own combination of a long-sleeved shirt and shorts before heading to the bathroom to change as well, then come back out to find angell sitting on your bed, as if waiting for you like an obedient pup.

“should i sleep in the living room sofa?” she asks before standing up to face you.

“oh, no no, we can just share my bed!” you say cheerfully without thinking. a mere millisecond later you realize what you just said, and your cheeks go red at your own suggestion.

angell, bless her, simply smiles. “alright. it is kinda cold tonight,” she remarks.

while you still feel bashful about your faux pas, this response is one that makes your heart skip a beat.

when the two of you get under the covers together, there's a bit of a distance that separates you from angell, though she sighs softly before inching closer and wrapping her arms around you like it's nothing, somehow. your eyes go wide and you feel your cheeks grow warm, and from this distance her golden eyes draw you in, just as they did when you first met.

“is this alright?” she asks almost nonchalantly, but you've grown used to her, you think. the underlying nervousness and shyness in her tone are not some product of misplaced illusion.

“it’s… more than alright.”

“…good.”

she holds you close, the rain still falling as little more than background noise, and the two of you simply… lay together. you allow your eyes to scan her face, even though you're both supposedly going to sleep now, and manage to catch her eyes traveling down to your lips, then flickering back up as if she didn't want to get caught.

so it's mutual, you think as a little smile rises to your face. “how about we stop this little game, why don't we.”

it's adorable how her lips form a little pout, clearly showing her puzzlement at those words, though all confusion flees when she feels your lips against hers, and instead you're rewarded with a quiet, soft grunt before her lips move in tandem with yours. your hands go down to hold her waist as she kisses you, and in return angell's hands rise to tangle her fingers through your hair.

she's inexperienced, you can tell by the way her teeth clash against yours sometimes, but that doesn't change how heavenly angell feels, how gentle she is despite clearly wanting to do even more.

at this point though? you're both equally desperate.

you pull away, just a few inches, and she's already whispering against your lips, “can we do more?”

you want to feel scandalized, almost. she's barely started kissing you and she already wants to do more, and yet… “i… so long as we're quiet,” you reply in a hushed whisper, but that's all it takes for angell to kiss you once more, though there's a hunger to her motions that goes entirely unrestrained now.

“you make my heart all… crazy,” angell murmurs against your lips, then pulls away to start leaving open mouthed kisses across your jaw, then neck, and soon she's silently asking for permission to lift your shirt by playing with the hem of it. you nod almost too eagerly.

angell takes in the sight of your bare front as she lifts your shirt up, and while you feel self-conscious for a second as you think of your stretch marks and extra weight, she's quick to reassure your insecurities in the way her lips continue their sloppy journey down the expanse of your skin, stopping at the valley of your breasts to nip and kiss at each tit.

“you're beautiful.”

“so… stunning.”

“you taste so good.”

if her mouth weren't working wonders across your body, you'd pull angell up to kiss her silly once more.

your hand tangles itself in her hair as she keeps going, and you bite your lip to avoid gasping loudly, for her mouth has wrapped itself around your nipple and god, she's driving you crazy.

the very tip of her tongue circles your areola, the sensation too much and yet not enough at the same time, before your grip on her hair tightens the second angell starts flicking the bud of your nipple properly, then she presses her tongue flat against the sensitive skin. she's not inexperienced, you realize, simply needy, hungry, eager.

angell lets go of your nipple with a quiet pop, and it's then that you realize she's pulled your shorts and underwear down while you weren't paying attention. “a-angell?” you call, though you want this as much as she does.

she hums curiously in response, and her lips kiss down your navel, until she's right next to the place where you need her most, where she plants a soft kiss to your inner thigh and makes direct eye contact.

“n-nevermind. carry on.”

she chuckles, the little devil. “thanks, babe.”

oh, you're going to lose your mind.

angell then dives right in, delivering almost teasing licks to your lower lips like she suddenly wants to take her time with you, uncomfortably akin to a cat playing with its prey. while she teases you with barely any pressure, you throw your head back, because this is still the first time someone has touched you like this in a long time.

and yet, it's everything you need. she's everything you need.

it takes her a few minutes, but suddenly, angell's already pushing two fingers inside your aching cunt, and this time you actually have to cover your mouth to avoid letting out a loud cry. angell takes it as a sign to be even more bold, and soon she's wrapping her lips around your clit and sucking while her fingers move in and out, then press down and curl right up against that gummy spot that has your toes curling in an instant. you realize she's started to grind her hips against the bed, but by god, you cannot focus on anything that isn't her mouth and fingers.

“god, angell, please-” you whimper quietly, only to muffle another moan when she increases the pace of her fingers, pumping in and out with a squelching noise. you can feel angell smiling as she lets go of your clit, as if she were savoring each reaction she gets out of you.

“don't worry, babe. i’ve got you,” she rasps against your drenched folds, the vibrations absolutely adding to the stimulation that's already making you bite your hand just so you can remain quiet. between that and the way her fingers fill your pussy, she's making you see stars.

your back arches while angell eats you out, but the second you let out another quiet gasp, she pulls away her mouth and fingers as if she could feel you were close to cumming.

angell chuckles at the way you whine, feeling empty now that her fingers don't fill you up anymore. “sorry, i just can't hold back anymore. really feels like i’m going crazy,” she whispers as she rises up from between your thighs.

you curiously raise an eyebrow, but before you can ask about what she means, angell pulls the shorts you lent her down. her dick is hard, tip red and coated in precum, clearly showing just how riled up eating you out has left her.

your eyes widen at her size, though you quickly realize angell almost looks nervous now, and that's enough for your expression to soften instantly.

“c'mere, honey,” you prompt gently, and the second angell leans down with her torso hovering over yours, you pull the sweater she's wearing off of her, leaving her bare for you to see in all her glory.

while she seems genuinely embarrassed at first, all it takes for her to relax is you gently cupping her cheek. just like that, those golden eyes you love so much gaze at you with lust and affection once more.

her chest, soft and pliant, presses against yours while the tip of her cock brushes against your cunt in a way that leaves you both eager for more.

“i'm going in now. last chance to back out,” she whispers against your ear.

“sweetheart, please just hurry,” you beg a moment later. angell holds back a soft laugh at just how eager you sound, and she decides she's done teasing you for tonight, just because she finds you cute.

you let out a soft sigh before gasping against her neck. angell grunts at the same time, slowly and gently pushing her cock inside you and filling you up in a way that feels wonderful. she shivers above you, breathing ragged and warm against your skin, and you wrap your arms around her back.

she lets you adjust, because this woman is as sweet as she's quiet, whispering about how good it feels, how you take her so well, how warm and tight you are around her cock.

soon the feeling isn't enough, and you whisper with utter need, “please… take me, angell.”

“i'd love nothing m-more,” she replies in a breathless murmur.

she pulls her hips away until the tip of her weeping length is the only thing that remains inside, then slams herself right in like it's natural for her, dragging a startled gasp from you due to how intense it is, how intense the pleasure is. you're quick to bury your face into your pillow, biting it to avoid letting out too loud a noise while angell does her best to keep her groans and whimpers quiet.

“god, you feel s-so tight,” she says while thrusting her hips into yours again, her pace slow yet hard. it's like she wants to focus on your pleasure, yet her own hunger drives her into increasing the pace of her hips.

soon she's relentless and almost growling against the skin of your neck, her hands gripping your hips almost possessively while she thrusts her cock in and out of you. all you can think about is her, her hands on your body, her lips on your neck, angell, angell, angell.

at one point, angell grips the back of your knees and pushes them back against your chest, all while thrusting relentlessly against your body, and the pleasure is already coiling in ways you hadn't even felt before in your life.

“i'm close, ‘m close,” you gasp while trying to stay silent, yet angell makes it so damn hard as she grunts against you.

“go ahead. let go, please, cum ‘round my, please,” she begs, and it's obvious that this song and dance of yours was going to end like this from the start.

with a strangled gasp, your mouth falls open and you cum around angell like she so eagerly pleaded for, leaving a white, frothy ring around the base of her length in just a few thrusts. the sight makes angell let out a sound between a grunt and a whine, and she bites down onto your shoulder before pulling out and stroking herself to completion, cumming all over your tummy while quietly gasping against your skin. the bite only adds to your pleasure, even with the slight pain that follows.

once she's done milking her own cock, angell flops down on top of you and lets go of your shoulder, her breath coming out in tired pants that match your own uneven breathing.

you let her lay there gladly, going as far as to stroke her hair before pressing a kiss to her forehead. angell hums at the sensation, then pays you right back with a kiss right on the center of her bite mark.

“be my girlfriend?” she asks, sounding satisfied yet drowsy.

with a tired little giggle, you continue to run your fingers against her scalp. nuzzled against you like this, she once again reminds you of a cat.

“you did it a bit out of order, love.”

[knightyoomyoui]

Mina x M/F Reader - "Need You Now"

One of my shortest one-shots in the book. Sorry if this is unlike most of my longer fics, unfortunately I have to say that due to how busy I am in my life right now, I can still insert wriing stories in my free time, but not as long as I use to do anymore. Probably my one-shots from now on will be like less than 3 or 5k word count. This fic is inspired from one of my favorite songs of all time, "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum. The structure of this story is in a music video-type narrative, so while reading this you can just imagine this as an alternative MV with the song in the background. I may have done the ending a little bit longer for the final chorus but I needed to add atleast more dialogue so yeah, just skip any unneccesary parts in your mind to fit it in the song haha. Lastly, I don't accept any commissions for now but I'm very open to accept any donations for you kind readers as another way of appreciation for my works. I can use this for my upcoming on-the-job training so please if you can spare some, I would be highly grateful. ko-fi.com/knightyoomyoui Enjoy reading!

It is nighttime of a random day in the 1700s in Japan, and Myoui Mina is currently living alone in her house. She is standing in front of the window as she views the townscape of Kobe with all the illuminated lights coming from the houses and posts. While her eyes are fixed on the scenery, her mind is busy projecting an image of a certain person to cope with the sadness she’s feeling.

Picture perfect memories with you is what she has been replaying on her mind again and again, in which she won’t stop or get tired at all, just like she can do with just being around you. All she feels is joy and tranquility within your presence, and although she needed it right now, it makes her disappointingly wonder why this day is just going to end up unlike what she had with you before.

Her almost-a-month of longing for you has already reached its breaking point, not for the idea of only meeting you in her dreams but to the annoying fact that you had to disappear without leaving any trace for her to follow or indication to be relieved that you’re doing well on wherever you may be at right now.

She reached for the telegraph in her table and tries to contact you until she realizes that she never had your contact with him and it will rather end up being pointless, just like as her search around the town that she has done few days ago, inquiring for your whereabouts.

Slamming the telegraph back into its place, Mina groaned and sighed heavily with a frown on her face. She sat on the bed, her energy deteriorating as the likelihood of receiving a response or an update about you increased. It’s already a wasted 49th attempt at reaching back to you, and she wondered how long it would take to be ignored like this.

Mina then started to question you by herself: did you ever become happy with her and do you even still think about her even when you're not around to spend time together with her? She knows that you already knew that she hates feeling abandoned anymore, and now that you act like you are unaware of it, Mina is now wondering twice if you even listened or understood why she said that and especially

when she told you how much you mean for her.

If she'll be the one to ask the same, she admits that she is and she does it always until now. She won’t be this determinated to find and learn any news about what you may be doing if you’re just somebody that she’s close with. No, for Mina… you turned out to be the only person that holds special purpose in her life.

And not having you anymore will make Mina lose interest or simply, a reason to continue living again. Twice is enough if the pain will just be doubled, she believes.

Mina has checked the time and realizes it's been already quarter after 1 AM that she remained awake. It made her broke down in tears, knowing that this isn't like her who waits for this long and the fear to be alone again is eating her up inside more in which you once helped her to fight it since the first time she met you.

Looking at the telegraph again, she said to herself that she won't call anymore, thinking that she might probably be disturbing you or becoming strange with her frantic efforts of searching for you, but Mina has already lost control, and she doesn't care anymore if she has become this desperate.

She just needs you tonight, and now that you’re gone after showing her how it feels to have someone by her side after living most of her life without a family, relative, or even friends, she doesn't know how she can manage without having you again in her life.

Meanwhile, not so far away from your hometown and from Mina’s sanctuary, you were cleaning your weapons until it got interrupted when your concentration vanished again just by the memory of Mina affecting your heart and mind.

You looked out the window, reflecting the dark sky and atmosphere outside. A sudden concern about how she may be doing had obliged your body to react. Letting out a huge exhale, you stood up and proceeded to your brewery to grab another bottle of whiskey.

Pouring one into the glass and taking it as medicine for missing Mina a lot again alleviates the loneliness from the state you are in. You kept your composure; you know the time is running out, and you just had to remain still and focus on the plan.

The more you keep remembering Mina, the more you have begun to appreciate every aspect of her, even more than you have ever crossed your mind. But then you have seemed to notice that whenever you have an episode of this, a strange feeling is lingering inside your heart.

Which led you to speculate if maybe you are now enjoying the existence of Mina like, way more or far away from just being a friend or a companion that you met when you were alone strolling through the forest. The thoughts of her being actually deadly gorgeous in a way that is obviously not a normal compliment anymore and her admiring personality have captured your attention further to how she really is as a mesmerizing woman.

You looked at the door shut, missing those moments where Mina would just freely sweep open through it and greet you with her gummy smile and her adorable cheeks that puff whenever she’s happy. If only she can visit you again, it will not be the same exchange that you’ll definitely do for her this time.

You owe her one that is more than that, that’s why. But then you took note that you'd save it for later as the perfect time is about to arrive soon nonetheless.

You checked the time and it's been quarter to 1 AM already. You also became aware that you’re starting to get drunk now. The alcohol increased the emotions you’ve been caging up inside, causing you to lose control that results to your tears containing the minimum of what you’re entirely feeling right now that’s making you obvious that you simply want to see Mina again.

You swore that you wouldn't call for her to keep your focus on the plan but at your drunken state, you have gotten lost out of your control, betraying your very own words.

You kept on mentioning Mina's name as you promised to yourself that you’ll come find and save her because if you don’t, you aren’t sure at all on what you can do without her.

And at the same time as when Mina declares to herself that she needs you, it wasn’t coincidental that you share the same sentiment.

Timeskip to 4AM early in the morning, Mina was peacefully sleeping on her bed when her enhanced senses had her alerted back to conscience. She rose from the bed and noticed some flashing lights and growing silhouettes coming from outside the window. It should’ve been dark and quiet during this time since it was still too early.

Checking out to gain a better glimpse of what source its coming from, she observed that the townspeople are marching into her house all bringing their tall torches and knives with them.

“Is there a ceremony being performed today? W-why are they making their way through here?” Mina then watched them seperate, in a form that they’re surrounding her house.

“D-do they know already?” Getting the hint that they all are now aware of her true nature, based on the knives and torches they brough with them, she became scared that this will be the time that she'll die.

They all began to yell and some went on to bump the front door repeatedly. Mina rushes to close the door of her bedroom. Hearing the door collapse from outside, footsteps and chatters came near towards her hiding place.

Mina started to block the door with her body as the townspeople banged through her door again, their intentions come full obvious that they came here with one objective, and that is to eliminate the impostor that has been living with them all along.

“Ah! P-please, stop!” she yelps and cries for mercy as she remains to secure all the doors for her safety while they barge into her place, she wishes for you to come for the last time

until she heard series of growls, curses, and screams from outside.

She tried to take a peek through the little gap that she made by opening the door a little. “YN!!!!!!!” Mina became horrified to witness you getting teamed up by your fellow townspeople with some dead people lying around as they bathe in their own blood along with some scattered through the walls because of what you did.

With your bloody huge knife, she realized that you came all around here to rescue Mina only to get outnumbered because of the ampunt of townspeople gathered to hunt and kill her kind.

“MINA!!! RUNNNN!!!!!” She heard you yell for her name while being battered and dominated by your monstrous townsmen. They all looked around to find her, and they spotted Mina peeking through the door.

She closed it again and barricaded it with her body. Their more aggressive bumps and your wails with your brutally awful state had Mina whimpering and crying poorly.

The pity she feels for you however loaded her infuriation. Every second her eyes blink, her pupils flicker into a purplish color. As she gritted her teeth, her hands clawed with some bio-kinetic energy forming like a ball through her grasp.

Her hair floats at the intense air caused by her transformation, and suddenly her witch powers awakened. She points her hands at the door and blast through it, sending all the townspeople back. The rest looked at her horrifyingly as Mina steps out of the shadows with her figure beaming in all purplish magic.

“KILL THE WITCH!!!” The all roared but Mina used her magic to dismantle every townspeople who go against her and YN, all in brutal fashion.

After she splits a woman in half in mid air with her innards and blood splattered across the room and into her face, she then got caught by the last three men by firing bullets at her, making her groan in pain.

They were about to do a double tap when you quickly stood back up despite being wrapped around in ropes. You attacked them by tackling and headbutting them away from Mina before you leave them for her to finish them all by exploding their brains out.

As she slowly calmed down and degenerates her magic, she breathe heavily and saw you staring at her in awe, speechless at her true identity as a witch. You know who she really is, but this is the first time you’ve seen her in her full potential.

Mina got afraid of how you will but in her surprise, you ran through her and reconciled with her in an embrace.

“A-aren’t you scared of me?”

“Of who you really are? I have accepted you since the beginning, I’m rather scared of what they might do to you.”

She immediately broke down in tears around your arms. “W-where have you’ve been all time? I thought you’ll leave me forever.”

“I’m sorry, Mina. I know, it’s all my fault that I didn’t inform you at all, but its all according to my plan and it has to be done.”

“So you knew about this?”

“I did. I overheard my tutors that one of them discovered your background of being a Myoui, a well-known family came from a coven of witches that they’ve… k-killed years ago. And since they knew me being close to you, I hide and there, I began making my plan to rescue you with the help of an informant.” You revealed the reason to your disappearance.

“Y-you did that f-for me? B-but you hurt yourself came all the way back here because of me… and you killed your-”

“Ofcourse and I don’t care about it, I rather can’t consume the guilt more of having you harmed than killing others who dares to lay their abusive hands at you. Y-you’re… you’re the only person I care… and love the most than anyone, Mina. You’re the only one I have left as much as you have me only in your life. I came here not just because I have to save you. I need you now, Mina. I can’t wait any longer again to see you.”

Mina cried again and buried her head deeper in your chest. “I need you now too, YN. And always. I’ve waited for you to come back.”

“And I’m here now, Mina. I’m never going away anymore. Whoever come across against us, we’ll face them together.”

You kissed her on the lips after breaking your hug with her. She was shocked at your action but it didn’t took her more time to catch up with your movement. As you and Mina stare at each other, both then smiled at this new found relationship that grew within your bond.

You helped Mina stand up and covered all her gunshot wounds, not minding your own evidence of violence through your beaten body. “I think we should go now, others will start coming here and they won’t like what they’re gonna see.”

You offered her hand at her and she looked at it before she returned her gaze at your face. “Should we run away from here?”

“I’ll follow you wherever we go.” Mina accepted, holding your hand with firm grip, enough to consider that she’ll forever stay by your side.

You nodded at her. Pulling her along with you, both left her house and all the deceased fellow townspeople inside as you escape the grotesque scene with Mina.

[bridgertonbabe]

So having read the bridgerton spouse group chats by you and bridgerton family group chats by @holybatgirlz I’ve realised Benedict seems to always been one of the ones getting injured during family games night…

Does Sophie ever ban him from playing after an Injury or flat out refuse to go after she’s had all four kids and Benedict ends up back in hospital and ends up out of action for a few weeks meaning Sophie has four kids and a husband to tend to (and forces the injuring causing party to wait on him hand and foot for the duration of his Convalescence)

Also on another point… reading these makes me wanna write a family games night fic 😂😂

I feel like by the time all the spouses are married in and as they all start their families that Bridgerton game nights would become a bit calmer - only fractionally, but enough that the hospital visits aren't as frequent and the injuries sustained are far less serious. Though the Bridgertons (and Kate) remain insanely competitive to a terrifying degree, the spouses manage to limit game nights to once a year at most and then following the annual game night the spouses make it very clear how little they care for the family's version of a casual night of board/parlour games, and at the very least some of the Bridgertons take their partners feelings on board and attempt to mellow their competitiveness (kinda).

But with that being said, just because the injuries at game nights wind down, doesn't mean casualties don't occur through other competitive dumbass means...

BSSG Group Chat

Sophie: Guys I'm at the hospital.

Penelope: omg are you ok?????

Lucy: oh no what's happened?

Sophie: Ben broke his leg.

Phillip: Shit how did he manage that?

Sophie: He broke it go-karting.

Gareth:

Simon: What the ever living fuck was he doing go-karting?

Lucy: and not to be ageist - but at his age????

Phillip: The fuck is he playing at?

Gareth: i have to know

Gareth: did he go by himself?

Michael: Gareth please don't make this any more tragic for Ben or any more embarrassing for Sophie

Sophie: For your information he wasn't by himself.

Lucy: then who the hell did he go with????

Penelope: wait

Sophie: Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news

Phillip: Oh no

Simon: Please don't say it

Sophie: But it was a Bridgerton sibling day out

Michael: Oh for fuck's sake

Lucy: but greg told me he was going to spend the afternoon helping his mum pick up the flowers and decorations for penelope and eloise's baby shower on saturday!

Penelope:

Simon: As much as I can share in your dismay Lucy I can't say I'm remotely shocked to learn that Daphne and her siblings all lied about their whereabouts to hide the fact that they were having a sneaky go-karting afternoon 😑

Michael: I'm well aware I'm including my wife in this but do none of them have jobs??? Who goes go-karting on a Wednesday afternoon????

Phillip: Lets just be grateful that there was only one casualty from their go-karting escapade.

Sophie: ...

Sophie: Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news again

Simon: Sophie don't you dare

Penelope: oh god do we even want to know

Sophie: But they've all been hospitalised.

Lucy:

Michael: Why

Simon:

Michael: Why must they be like this

Gareth: just how exactly do 8 people get taken to hospital from a single go-karting afternoon?

Phillip: Soph is El ok????? I'm on my way right now

Sophie: She's ok Phil and so is the baby, she's just got a sprained wrist. She fared the best out of them all injury wise.

Penelope: El's fared the best???????

Michael:

Michael: Just what exactly is the extent of the damages we're talking here @ Sophie

Sophie: So Colin has a broken leg to match Ben's, Anthony's in a neck brace, Fran's fractured a couple of ribs, Daph's fractured her arm while Greg's broken his and has bruised his coccyx, and Hy's broken her big toe and is currently sporting an eye patch.

Penelope: COLIN'S BROKEN HIS LEG???????

Penelope: I'm 4 weeks away from giving birth wtf am I supposed to do with Limpy for a husband?!?!?!?

Lucy: ffs greg and i were supposed to be playing tennis with hermione and my brother this sunday 😤

Gareth: at least this isn't your wife:

Gareth: and soph how exactly did hy end up with an eye patch from go-karting?

Sophie: Greg shot her.

Lucy: HE DID WHAT

Simon: He shot her?????

Michael: Wow Greg shot Hy?

Michael: Honestly I would have imagined Fran snapping before Greg

Gareth: @ Sophie if you've previously failed to mention that my wife is wearing an eye patch because she's been blinded in that eye NOW WOULD BE THE TIME TO MENTION IT

Sophie: Relax she hasn't been blinded, it's just precautionary until the swelling's gone down.

Lucy: CAN WE GET BACK TO THE PART WHERE MY HUSBAND SHOT HIS SISTER

Penelope: yeah wtf is Greg doing with a gun????

Simon: And why does he have one for go-karting?!?!??!

Sophie: Ok so it was a BB gun he was using

Lucy: AND HE HAD IT BECAUSE?!?!?!?!?

Sophie: Well you're all going to love this

Sophie: They weren't just doing regular go-karting

Phillip: What

Sophie: They were doing it Mario Kart style.

Michael:

Simon: I actually can't stand them.

Gareth: not to be pedantic but they don't have guns in mario kart

Gareth: did they get it mixed up with gta coz that would make way more sense with all of the injuries they've acculumated

Lucy: are you seriously telling me they were driving go-karts around a track while shooting at each other??????

Penelope: I'm a month away from giving birth to a Bridgerton baby 🙃

Sophie: Basically they were using an assortment of items like hurling banana peels and pouring out oil on the track to make the others slip, they were throwing frisbees and balls at each other which were meant to be like shells and they had a variety of water/nerf/BB guns to take each other out that way. All of which contributed to the massive pile up that caused most of their injuries.

Michael: God almighty

Gareth: question; was hy not wearing a helmet?

Sophie: She was but she had the visor open after Eloise sprayed it over with paint which was how she ended up getting shot.

Kate: Omfg

Kate: I cannot believe this!

Sophie: It's a lot to take in I know.

Kate: I can't believe they didn't invite me!

Michael: Kate do you even care that your husband is in a neck brace?

Kate: Well that's what he fucking gets for not including me! Karma's a bitch and so is Anthony!

Simon: @ Kate

Phillip: God can you imagine what Violet's reaction to this is going to be when she finds out?

Sophie: No need to imagine she already knows.

Penelope: omfg

Gareth: damn you already told on them???

Sophie: Violet was the first person I told as soon as I heard about it all. I'm sick to death of them all acting like this and being so stupidly reckless. Not one of them even stopped to think that it might not be a good idea and now I've got to see after 4 kids with an invalid for a husband, and the rest of their injuries will come as just as great an inconvenience to all of you as well!

Sophie: So yeah I immediately went to Violet to tell on them because I want her to wipe the absolute floor with them for being so thoughtless!!!!!

Penelope:

Gareth:

Michael: You did what had to be done Soph and for that I applaud you 👏👏👏

Sophie: But that's not all, I'm also punishing Ben for being so feckless.

Kate: Oooh kinky

Sophie: Far from it. For starters when I got here Ben wanted to cuddle Vi to cheer himself up but I told him no and that he's getting no snuggles with her from now until his cast comes off.

Gareth: holy shit you're gate-keeping his own daughter from him

Lucy:

Lucy: and i love it

Michael: How quickly did he start to cry?

Sophie: Instantaneously. It was incredibly rewarding.

Sophie: And I'd encourage you all to do the same with your respective Bridgerton in whatever way you see fit.

Penelope: once Colin's home I'll keep offering him food but then just sit and eat it right in front of him 😈😈😈

Gareth: i'm going to get a toy parrot and perch it on hy's shoulder and call her patchy 🦜

Simon: I'm not even going to bother picking Daph up from the hospital. She has to learn she can't keep pulling stunts like this as a mother of four.

Simon: That and I've already started drinking to deal with this nonsense so I couldn't even if I had to.

Phillip: I'm going to make El take and stay with the twins at back to back children's parties this weekend. She'll absolutely fucking hate it.

Kate: I'm just going to laugh in Anthony's face. Probably get the kids to join in too.

Lucy: damn i'm not sure what i'm going to do with greg

Michael: I'm going to withhold sex.

Penelope: damn that's a bold move

Simon: But is that going to be more of a punishment for her or you?

Michael: Not to give you all too much of an insight but that's going to kill Fran more than you'd think it would.

Michael: But that's what she gets for going along with her fam's unhinged competitive behaviour.

Michael: No more snu snu.

Penelope: I actually think if we all withheld sex from our respective partners that they might finally learn their lesson.

Lucy: that's... actually a very valid point that could very much work

Kate: Well we don't call them sex idiots for nothing.

Michael: They're essentially a bunch of horny Tinkerbells; they need sex to live.

Simon: I truly hate that sentiment. But you're not wrong.

Michael: So are you all following my lead? It's your own choice obvs, no pressure if anyone would prefer not to.

Gareth: i'm not exactly chomping at the bit to be having snu snu with patchy

Kate: Yeah neck braces don't make for a turn on either.

Penelope: And being this pregnant I'm not really in the mood for it as it is.

Sophie: Like I'm going to have the time or energy seeing after the kids while Ben's bedridden anyway.

Lucy: fine by me

Simon: I have 0 qualms with this method of punishment.

Phillip: Same here.

Michael: Then it's no snu snu all around! Vive le resistance!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for resenting my father after he forced me into braces?

For context I am seventeen now but was forced into braces at twelve years old. While I did have very crooked teeth, I never wanted braces, my teeth never caused me any sort of physical pain or insecurity. I told him as much before I was put into braces. But he refused to hear it.

As far as I'm aware braces were not a medical necessity for me.

I've repeatedly tried to discuss it with him but he always tells me that he has a good insurance, one that covers dental care for all children under the age of twenty one and that I should be grateful. He also told me that if he didn't make me get braces I would be angry and upset with him when I turn twenty one.

I tell him that that's not true, that it's my body and I should have a say in the matter but he only says that he's doing what's best for me and refuses to discuss it any further.

What's worse is that each appointment is a drive that's an hour and a half away from where I live—they aren't open on weekends or evenings—so every appointment (once a month) I have to miss at least half of a school day (but usually it ends up being a full day of school) even if the appointment itself is only fifteen minutes. We do have a local orthodontist but my father refuses to take me there because he thinks the guy who runs the place is money hungry.

Anyway, I'll be getting my braces off in a few months. The orthodontic team has made an entire treatment plan for me—one that involves me wearing a retainer 24/7, indefinitely. And later getting implants. I don't want to follow this treatment plan and I don't like that it was made without me ever being asked how I feel about it.

I've told other people about it, and they've said that I'm making a fuss about nothing and that parents have the right to decide what's best for thier children. But I'm not a child anymore.

I know he was doing what he thought was best but I secretly resent my father for putting me in braces when I didn't want them. I think the fact that he never took my wishes into account or asked me how I felt makes him a bad parent. But maybe I'm overreacting.

Is he right? Am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[familyvideostevie]

hey.

okay. hello! i'm back. :)

maybe you noticed, maybe not, but i have been away for a while.

i wish i could say i've been out living my life, so caught up in happiness and joy and loving each day that i've just not had time for tumblr. but....that is not true. i have been having a tough time! being away has been good, as i've had time to do other things that i like and to put energy into my own well-being, but it hasn't been the best time, I'll tell you that.

i peeked on the dash every now and then to keep my queue full and reblogged soothing things to my main blog and tried my best not to feel guilty about it all (i was also booping on April 1 lol). i just...I really needed a break. i've really enjoyed being here the last six or so months as i've changed my blog and entered the pedro/tlou space but i've also felt so, so alone.

and i know that it doesn't really matter!! like, we should all take breaks and go outside and all that stuff. and I know plenty of people are not very active, but this blog has been such a vital part of my life and happiness since I started it almost two years ago, so any lapse in activity feels like a loss. I've met lifelong friends and flexed my writing muscles and learned a hell of a lot. the fact that I have started to feel isolated and alone on here is a sort of personal betrayal, and there is no one to blame but myself.

So, I’m pulling back.

it means a few things — i don’t know how much writing I’ll be doing from now on. For Joel, especially — it’s been wonderful to meet folks in that community but it has also been really detrimental to my passion for both the game and writing. I’d like to return to some other characters on my masterlist, but we’ll see. I’ve got endless personal projects away from tumblr that I want to pour love and time into (my non-reader fics, my newsletter, a romance novel, a sci-fi novel, poetry, etc). I need to fall in love with my own work again.

it's a me problem, I want to stress that. i'm working on it! irl stuff has been kicking my ass. I've had a really, really hard winter and my mental health has suffered probably more than ever before. i let things I love -- like this blog -- fester and become negative and no longer being me joy. writing became stressful and difficult and I was focused on notes and interaction and looking around me and seeing success and then looking at myself and only seeing lack.

but that's why I took a break! i am getting help and support irl, i am putting in the time and effort to feel better about being alive and to be a better friend and person all around. And I want to tell you all about it because I am so grateful for your time and attention and support, even if we’re just strangers on the internet. i know this probably seems silly -- who cares about a fanfic blog? well, i care! i care a lot! it matters to me and therefore it matters!

anyway. on to the important stuff. here I am! and here's what's going to happen on this blog:

I am working on replying to asks and reblogs and comments I missed. Thank you for being patient with me! I don't know if I'll get to them all but know I see them and I am honored every single time.

I made a totally separate ao3 account with this blog url. I'm working on uploading everything I've posted here onto there and hopefully will continue to crosspost. It is going to take a long, long time, so please be patient! (you can follow my other ao3 here for my non x-reader fanfic).

I posted this fic! Jackson!Joel pulled me back into his world. It’s the first thing I’ve written in ages, so let me know what you think. as of now it's the last planned fic for that series, but who knows!

I hit a milestone while i was away that I am absolutely blown away by. I'm planning a celebration around it sometime this spring (hopefully) and I’d love to see you participate :)

lastly, thank you so much to my friends for letting me complain, whine, winge, etc. I am so sorry for missing all of your work, your celebrations, your bright energies, and all the rest. i am so sorry if it seemed like i was ignoring you. you are my guiding lights, my silver linings, my touchstones. you make me want to be here. i will try to make it up to you!

I want to be online less but make sure I’m connecting more in the moments that i am here. I want to pressure myself to write less and not feel bad that I’m not engaged all the time. I want this blog to once again feel like a place that nourishes me and not sucks me dry. i want to stop feeling like shit about all of it!!!!

so. come hang out in my inbox, my dms, let me know what you've been up to. I am really sorry for missing so much. thank you for sticking around. <3

[hauntedwitch04]

Fools in love

Remus Lupin x reader

Words: 1,8k words

Warnings: none, just fluff and idiots totally in love with each other

Author’s note: Hi everybody! It fells so good being back, I missed writing and this is the first one-shot I write in a lot of time, so I'm really grateful for every tiny bit of love you gave me. Hope you enjoy the first day of my Halloween Party

Requests are open I Ask

My masterlist

Join the Taglist

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🎃Halloween party 🎃

DAY 1: “Take my sweater, I love you and i don’t want you to transform into a popsicle”

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Rain beats hard against the windows of the Gryffindor common room. The fire near me crackles, and the pieces of wood seem to break like bone after a very hard punch, as my heart probably had a few hours ago.

I've spent a lot of time by the fire, but even so, I can't shake the cold that got into my bones, in the rush in the rain I made to get back to the castle, after waiting for more than two hours for a Ravenclaw boy who asked me out, outside the Mielandia.

I still remember the feeling of the cold wind against my cheeks wet with hot tears. My sweater was now dumped on the sofa, soaked with rain, and dripping rhythmically on the floor, mesmerizing me.

The fire dances before my eyes, and I can't help but feel like two people hugged tightly, dancing to music of their own created by their love.

A little bit I feel stupid in feeling so bad, for a guy who basically I don't even like since I've actually been in love with one of my best friends for what seems like ages now, but I think the thing that has hurt me most of all is not being able to be loved even by this mysterious guy whose name I honestly can't even remember.

For hours now I've been asking myself if I'm really worth loving? Why should people fall in love with me? Am I worthy of someone's love? If I can't even date a guy I don't like, how could I ever date the one I consider the love of my life? And why the hell does Remus John Lupin have to be so perfect?

I spend what seems like days sitting there staring into the fire. I hear people passing by, coming in and out of the dorms, some stop and look at me with compassion, trying to somehow share my pain, while others whisper hypotheses and theories about why I am in that situation. I, however, remain impassive, like a marble statue, the only emotion I allow to shine through are the tears I cannot stop.

It is still a long time before I can glance at the clock without seeing it fogged up by my crying.

Midnight.

I close my eyes and pray for any otherworldly entity to erase my memory of this rainy early October day, when my thoughts are interrupted by a warm hand resting on my shoulder. I turn slightly and my breath catches in my throat for a moment, for fear that the object of my thoughts will see itself reflected in my eyes and be able to read into me, into my soul.

"Lily told me you've been stationary here for more than four hours. I had to practically make a deal with the devil to get Poppy to let me leave early to come to you, luckily yesterday wasn't too bad." He says quietly as he sits down next to me, the famous Remus Lupin, every Hogwarts girl's dream, looking at me softly. Shit, I think to myself, there was a full moon yesterday that's why I didn't see him all day. I hadn't worried about it too much actually before I went to the appointment, too caught up in the anxiety of this meeting, but now I realize what a shitty friend I've been to him. I look at him and see his face battered by sleep and exhaustion, while only a few new scratches or scars adorn his face. My eyes land on his, and selling his worried look I can't help but feel guilty and go back to crying. After a few seconds, I realize that I am not only crying out of guilt, but also out of the realization that he, the boy I love more than my own life, will never see me in the same way that I see him but only as a friend to be taken care of.

His warm hands brush my shoulders and I immediately shiver at that contact. His gaze grows even more concerned and he immediately decides to take off his heavy sweater, one of his favorites that his mother made him last year after his had all grown small when he grew up all of a sudden during the summer. As he takes off the sweater, with his arms still above his head and this one still covered by the garment, his T-shirt, which he wore underneath, rises slightly so that his athletic body covered in scratches can be seen. I feel my cheeks turn red as I look at him, but I am quickly distracted by my friend handing me his sweater.

"Take my sweater, I love you and I don't want you to turn into a popsicle," he says, fixing his hair. His words strike me more pain than a bullet, but I hide my distress behind a bitter smile, and put on his sweater. Immediately I am hit by his scent: chocolate, cinnamon, ink mixed with book pages and cigarettes. I thank him in a thin voice, before returning to silence.

"I guess I understand that the date didn't go very well." He says after a few minutes, trying to figure out if I felt like talking about it, watching me carefully as I played with my sleeves.

"Actually, there wasn't even a date." I reply, chuckling bitterly.

"What do you mean?" He retorts confused, as he moves closer to me, to study me better.

"Well he never showed up. I stood like a moron in front of the place where he told me to meet for a couple of hours, even caught some rain, then when I realized that I was merely making a fool of myself I came running back here, and I haven't moved from here since." I explain quickly, not wanting to cry again.

I see the anger mounting in his eyes as he takes one of my hands between his and brings it to his mouth.

"If anyone has made a fool of himself it's him, honey. He's a fool if he missed an opportunity like this. You deserve so much better, the best person the world has to offer." He says in a whisper as he holds me in his arms, doing nothing but twisting the knife in the wound making me bleed more and more.

After a while he breaks away from that grip and takes something out of his pants pocket, which I discover is a piece of chocolate, and hands it to me.

"Eat, you'll feel better." He tells me, but I shake my head.

"I don't feel like eating, Remmy." I try calling him by his nickname, hoping to soften him, knowing that when he puts his mind to something, it's hard to change his mind.

"Honey, I won't take no for an answer. I care about you, like a sister, and I don't want to not only see you suffer for that moron but also starve to death." He continues, pulling my face up, resting one of his fingers under my face.

I don't know why I feel something breaking inside, as if a pitcher full of water has decided to pour in, and I no longer have control over my words.

"That's exactly my problem Remmy. I'm not crying, sitting here for over four hours for a guy whose name I can't even remember, I'm feeling like I'm dying inside because what happened made me realize that the only guy I've ever really loved in my life will never look at me, if he's not even interested in me even a person who's not even worth a hole in his sock. I've been sitting here for hours crying because I'm afraid that I'm not worthy of being loved, because I'm afraid that I'll have to live with these damn feelings, because I'm afraid that I'll see this boy grow up and fall in love with someone else while I'll still be here, and he'll continue to see me as just a sister, and he just happens to have reminded me of that fact himself just a little while ago." At my last words I see his eyes light up, having realized who I was talking about, after being dark and dull throughout my entire speech. "And now if you don't mind, after screwing up our friendship, I'm going to bed." And I try to get up, but I don't make it in time because a hand encircles my wrist and Remus draws me toward him forcefully, in contrast to his delicate lips brushing against mine. It takes me a few seconds to return the kiss, unsure of what this moment might change between us, before I let myself go completely to him. I bring my hands behind his head, and run my fingers through his hair, while his hands go around my hips to take me on his lap, as we continue to kiss, as if we were suffocating and that was our oxygen.

"I love you, I love you, I've loved you for what seems like forever, and I'm just a coward for not telling you sooner." He says pulling away slightly, so he can breathe before giving me another full kiss. Then he starts giggling, and I look at him shocked, before I start laughing too. We laugh until our stomachs hurt and tears furrow our faces. Remus stands up, picks me up and lays me down on the couch in front of the fire, then lies down next to me.

"We are two idiots." I say, chuckling some more. "We are so stupidly in love that we didn't realize each other's feelings."

"We're all idiots in love, honey." Remus replies, kissing my forehead. "Sirius will never get tired of holding it against me that he was right." He says giggling and hiding his face in the crook of my neck.

"Not even Lily." I chuckle in response as well, before I feel that being held tightly in her arms, sleep is slowly taking over my senses.

"By the way, you look very good in my sweater, honey." Those are the last words I hear before I fall completely asleep.

At that moment, however, neither of us knows yet that our friends will never let us forget the fact that they found us the next morning cuddled on the couch in the Common Room, in front of the fire, and I was wearing the sweater of what would become my husband and the father of my children, to whom Sirius would tell this story and how their parents fell in love and how he and Aunt Lily were right.

[moonlight-prose]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I have spent several days drafting this post because there's so much I want to say. 2023 was filled with some big moments for me. I graduated college, met my friend group, went on night time adventures, and actually acted like my age for once. I was chaotic and fun and carefree for the first time since I turned 19. But things have also gone wrong in many ways.

Which is why I write this to you guys. The incredible people on this site. Whether you follow me, are my mutuals, or have seen my blog in passing (or in your notes), I want to wish you a Happy New Year.

While this year might have sucked for a majority of it, the light I found in this community - on this site - is unmatched. I have met some of my greatest friends here. I've cried to fics, lost my mind over characters, and written so much more than I actually expected. It's been a hell of a year and an absolute honor getting to thirst with y'all.

So here's to getting sluttier in 2024! I'm toasting my champagne glass to you guys.

I also wanted to simply shout out some very important people to me. They've made 2023 bearable and I couldn't have been happier to know them through this place. A big massive fucking THANK YOU to my darlings. You're the greatest people I know.

@soulores my queen, my babe, my bestie. it is hard to believe we didn't start officially talking till summer of this year, because i genuinely feel like we've known each other for years. from our sunday morning phone conversations, to our screaming in the dms about these fictional men, and movie days with you. i couldn't have asked for a better friend to meet this year. here's to many many more memories in 2024 (and to finally meeting in person!).

@themarcusmoreno what would be a dedication post without mentioning you! my love i am so so fucking happy we met two years ago. all because of pedro pascal. crazy to think i would have found such an incredible person who happened to love all the things i love! you're the greatest friend and i am so grateful for you. thank you for sticking with me.

@sunflowersteves vic the absolute bad bitch. THE PERSON YOU ARE. i am so so so so fucking happy you and i are still mutuals. after meeting through marvel of all things and then pedro and now top gun. there's so many memories with you i cherish. and i can't wait to make more. and a massive thank you for being such a cheerleader for my writing this year. you and ash have managed to keep me going even when times were tough.

@karasong my first EVER mutual on this site. it's so hard to think that if it weren't for you i wouldn't be writing on here. you followed me two years ago and i flipped out and the feeling hasn't changed one bit. i couldn't be happier you're in my life. from starting up the server with you, to yearning for obi-wan, life with you in it is so much better.

@softanon it would not be a proper dedication post if i did not add you babes. dia you are one of my favorite people to exist. you're effortlessly cool, have the best ideas, and i always feel so lucky that i met you. from our talks about the moon knight bois, to tommy miller, to yearning over din djarin, i have loved every single convo with you. they bring me so much joy. you are an incredible person and i am looking forward to SO MANY more convos about our favorite men!

@saradika to one of the greatest people to exist in this fandom i love love love you. your graphics and the love you show to everyone around is so incredible and bright. we seriously don't deserve you, but i am so happy you are here and that you exist. you've made 2024 brighter just by being here.

@tarrenterror25 the spookiest darling ever! when you showed up on the server it was such a good day! and you brought with you so much fun and joy that the server was never the same. i am sending you an infinite amount of love this new years and here's to more chaos with you in 2024!

to my darlings in the dilf nation server:

@arctvrvs thea babes you are iconic, lovely, and are one of the best people to exist. you made 2023 so much better just by being around to yearn over joel with you. i couldn't be happier to know you!

@fluffyprettykitty selene you are the coolest people who has the coolest fics! the love you share on fics is so incredible, it never ceases to bring a smile to my face. also you're just so awesome i couldn't have asked for a better person to join the server.

@rae-gar-targaryen my fanboy lover in crime. i'm sure i've said it countless times, but you are so cool and amazing and beautiful. you are a goddess in real life. the talent you have is so fucking incredible it haunts me. i love each and every one of your creations and i love you as well!

@mostly-megan you are an absolute sweetheart and even though we haven't talked much in 2023, i hope to have so many more conversations with you in the coming new year. sending you my love darling!

@agirllovespancakes iris you lovely human being. i remember when i was first posting hurt you would reblog the greatest comments. and it made me want to continue, because i looked forward to each one. and now that i know you love tommy too! you're so amazing and i dedicate a new years kiss to you.

@inklore you talented insanely incredible person! i could make a whole list of good things about you. i am sending you SO MUCH love for 2024. i hope it's amazing.

@outercrasis birdie my darling i want to tell you all the things that i cherish about you. from the love you showed on black velvet, to the way we screamed about bruce wayne and even frank castle, i live for our conversations. here's to so much more fun in 2024 and infinite convos about saltburn.

tagging those lovely humans who've made 2023 so incredible. please know i love you so much and i am kissing you when the clock strikes midnight. thank you for making this year so incredible!:

@stargazingcarol, @cregan-starks, @lady-of-glass-and-bone, @fushic0re, @targaryenvampireslayer, @pennyserenade, @flightlessangelwings, @stargirlfics, @goldgilzean, @kalllistos, @flordeamatista, @perotovar, @my-secret-shame, @roamwithahungryheart, @galatially, @eloquentmoon, @starryeyedstories, @oscarseyebrow, @iraot, @zinzinina, @thefact0rygirl, @iamskyereads, @navybrat817, @ifimayhaveaword, @the-godparticle

[t4le-4s-0ld-4s-t1m3]

So I'm on youtube, looking for reviews of Damsel because I loved it and wanted to find a comment section with like-minded people. Only I never ended up participating in any discussions. Oh there were a bunch a reviews, some of them positive. But I got distracted by the overwhelming amount of reviews made by middle-aged white men with horrible titles.

Now did I expect everyone to like it ? No, of course not, taste is subjective. Do I think the movie is perfect ? No, it's a B-movie if we're being honest, the plot is very basic and there is not a lot of depth, though I think there is more than meets the eye. It's a power fantasy movie, with all the suspension of disbelief and fun that entails. A turn your brain off, you leave feeling badass kind of movie.

All the same, the heartbreak and frustration I feel after clicking on a few of them, watching about a minute, and going through the comment sections is immeasurable. Because the commentary was always the same, "this is anti-white men" (media literacy is dead by the way, because how ? How was that a conclusion ?), "hollywood pushing the girlboss agenda", "worse movie ever", "why do all female protagonists have to be strong, why can't they be soft", "feminists and their anti-marriage propaganda". Guys, I don't know if it's just because I'm in my mid-twenties now, or because more men have become radicalised, or both. But I am so, so tired of this shit. So tired of feeling like some men want to put me in a very small box and keep me there because they feel entitled to it. And I'm by no means someone who doesn't largely fit in the mould to begin with. I'm a girly-girly with no desire to act like a man or fight like one. I appreciate book Sansa Stark so much for the symbol of soft power that she is, and I do agree that there should be more women like her in fiction. But that these men feel not only comfortable, but entitled to throw so many tantrums trying to shame and force me to never stray from the mould, and watch as they do the same to women who do not and should not have to fit into it, more and more grating. Why can't we have power fantasy movies ? Why does it make them so angry ? I've never seen their power fantasy movies get dunked on. Hell, we usely enjoy them alongside them. Why can't they do the same ? Why must everything targeted at us be something for them to ridicule ?

And do you know what the worse part is ? While watching the movie, I caught myself thinking "most of this isn't unrealistic for a fit woman with magical healing slugs, she only really survives because the dragon is sadistic and enjoys prolonging her suffering, surely the filmbros won't get too annoying". I already knew on some level what was going to happen, because it's what always happens isn't it ? I wast just too hopeful it seems.

[fondofcowboys]

here's my very all over the place feelings on certain aspects of baldur's gate 3 as a romani immigrant. warnings for spoilers of course. mind you i have not finished the game yet!

1. i really can't believe there aren't more people talking about the very blatant racism in astarion's questline. im quite sure it's because the game already touches on it, even giving you the choice to call astarion a racist, and also because everytime we roma talk about anything that makes us uncomfortable we're immediately shunned and "well actually!"'d.

the problem is that it feels Extra icky because the man who was the inspiration for the original dracula, Vlad the Impaler, kept romani slaves. this is the ONLY part of vampire history that, no matter how different the media, will always stay relevant for some reason.

castlevania has the seekers, a nomadic group of magic users who pass their history down orally. while they are *mostly* treated well, the first arc of the show literally shows them being hunted out of town for the simple act of existing.

vampire the masquerade... well.. that's an entire other can of racism worms.

curse of strahd has the "vistani", a nomadic group of people who are treated like third class citizens everywhere they go, and are of course, most known for being tarot readers and drunkards.

the vampire diaries have the "travellers", who get called "gypsies" explicitly as a derogatory word by other vampires.

i want you to take any vampire media you enjoy and ask yourself, "is there anti-roma racism in this?". i guarantee you, if you look for it, you're going to find it. for SOME reason, the only thing that stays consistent with all these different vampire IPs, is that romani people are hated and scrutinized at every moment of their lives.

i MORE than understand that astarion's racial insensitivity is part of him. it's part of what makes him malleable by the player. you can help him understand why he's wrong, or you can lead him down a worse path.

i still reserve the right to feel some sort of way about astarion sacrificing fantasy-romani children for power, willingly. don't get me wrong, he's my favourite character, right up there with halsin. which is why i obviously have so many feelings about this.

(yes, the Gur were written inspired by romani people, if you were not aware)

2. the anti-immigrant sentiment is such an inherent part of the story that i did not think was going to stick around for SO long. i dont really have much to say about this, i think i should've expected it. as a fan of dragon age (i know, tragic) i'm quite used to unnecessary fantasy racism everywhere i go, i just hoped it wouldn't be part of the main crucial story.

3. larian studios i am so so so thankful for the halsin romance. eternally. forever and ever. he's my pookie bear and i'm so grateful some extra time was made to create a romance for him.

can i ask you why the hell does halsin want to LEAVE. At The End. i've noticed how much he contradicts himself throughout his questline and i just... I don't know. i've seen some other people complaining about how non-chalantly he talks about being a sex slave and i understand too, but i think it's part of his character to not take the horrible things that happened to him seriously like he does with others. that, or someone at larian took an unknown substance that led them to make halsin Very inconsistent.

with the poly situation, some people are strictly polyamorous! some people are strictly non-monogamous and do not feel comfortable being in a monogamous relationship. i understand the frustration everyone, but that's how halsin is. i dont know if that was the writers' intention, but that's certainly what he comes across as to me; strictly non-monogamous.

what i DONT understand is why he says he only wants you, calls you "my heart", is so fondly and lovingly attached to you, and then he just.... Dips? Whatever. I'm ignoring that part forever. it's not canon to ME!

anyways. yeah. feel free to Engage in some Friendly conversation. emphasis on friendly, for the love of g-d

[mcflymemes]

ALISTAIR THEIRIN QUOTES *  dialogue from dragon age: origins, updated version

excuse me while i begin projectile vomiting.

you were the first person i ever spent the night with, and if i had my way... you'd be the last.

do you think you might ever... feel the same way about me?

will you miss it once it's over?

i care for you so much.

i love you. more than i ever thought possible.

i wish i could be better at this.

you know that i've never done anything like this. with anyone.

i guess i was raised not to take this sort of thing lightly.

it's just like being home again.

i can't run away from it anymore.

given the circumstances, things could have been so much worse.

i locked myself in a cage once, when i was a child. for an entire day. ah. good times.

i'm willing to... give it a shot. if you are.

aw, that's sweet.

you're beautiful. i am a lucky man.

i know it might sound strange, considering we haven't known each other for very long, but i've come to... care for you. a great deal.

now's as good a time as any to talk, right?

i'm so grateful that you're... you.

let's get back to... what we were up to before.

i hope it hasn't... put you off.

anyway, uh, sorry about that. i'll take it from you right now.

great. they just love me.

i was just thinking about you! isn't that a marvelous coincidence?

now that i've handled that with my usual deft brilliance, time to move on! and take a cold bath, maybe.

locking the door and throwing away the key was plan b.

is it just me, or did i do really badly back there?

don't look now... but. well. look now!

i don't think we're alone. i really don't think we're alone.

all right! let's go!

oh? you want to... right now? well, who am i to refuse?

um... that sounded better in my head. i just meant to say that i can't imagine having done this without you.

we're not exactly traveling in the lap of luxury here.

you feel that? it's actually colder up here.

is this place even on a proper map?

look at it all!

i'll be... standing over here. until the blushing stops. just to be... uh. safe. you know how it is.

maybe it likes you?

swooping is bad.

what is it, then? rats running amok? cheese supplies running low?

i see you can't sleep, either.

i was just thinking... here i am doing all this complaining, and you haven't exactly been having a good time of it yourself.

why are you smiling like that?

that just seems so excessive.

are you just making these up right now?

now that's dedication!

it's all been death and fighting and tragedy.

make fun of you? perish the thought.

old books. you think any of those might still be readable?

do you get the feeling things are just getting worse as we go up?

more crazy? i thought we were all full up.

i thought maybe i could say something. tell you what a rare and wonderful thing you are to find amidst all this... darkness.

they say you can get anything here. i once got pick-pocketed.

this is where the nobility come to get drunk and debate who's the most self-important of them all.

we get lost, people die, and the next thing you know i'm stranded somewhere without any pants.

now that's just unnecessary.

have you ever licked a lamppost in the winter?

can't... keep my eyes open. someone... pinch me.

where do you think they get all this stuff?

oh! here i am! and there you are! you just disappeared!

why do they call it a brothel? there's no broth. or is there?

we're not going to be mobbed, right?

now that is a big tree.

i hate you. you're a bad person.

i'm not falling asleep again!

we seem to be heading... up? yes. i think these caves are going up to the surface.

can we expect more of those?

what is that smell? fish? and something else. oh. more fish.

uh oh. i'm terrible at puzzles.

i know most guys would probably leap at the chance to be with you, but i don't know if i'm ready for that. it's a big step.

maybe i should touch them. or stand on them?

pleased to meet you. nice campfire you have there.

let's try not to get lost here.

bluff called! damn! you saw right through me!

i think there's something ahead. something big.

you have my condolences.

and here i was going to name one of my children after you.

you seem more "ooh, pretty colors!" than "muahaha! i am princess stabbity! stab, kill, kill!"

i gazed, glanced in that direction, maybe. but i wasn't staring. or really... seeing anything, even.

what? lead? me? no no no. no leading. bad things happen when i lead.

they're really quite tasty.

we take our ingredients, throw them into the largest pot we can find, and cook them for as long as possible until everything is a uniform grey color.

watch as i thrash our enemies with the mighty power of floral arrangements!

i will overpower you with my rosy scent!

i was looking at your nose.

your desire is my command.

i guess that must make me sound like an idiot.

just what every man wants to hear.

now if we could move right on past this awkward, embarrassing stage and get right to the steamy bits, i'd appreciate it.

[annab99awritersdream]

TOLKIEN OC WEEK 2024-Day 7

Prompt: Freeform

Title: Güzel Kardeşim (My beautiful sister)

Synopsis: Anárion Lives! AU

Anárion visits his family in Ithilien and spends some time with his little sister Éowyn.

Words: (to be updated once I post it on AO3)

GLOSSARY (VALARIN):

Anárion Abim geldi: my brother Anárion has arrived/is here.

Abi (short form of ağabey): older brother

Abicim: my beloved brother.

Annem yok: no mamma

Neden annemi görmek istemiyorsun?: why don't you want to see mom?

Annem beni sevmiyor: my mom doesn't like me.

Söz mü?: promise?

Söz: promise.

ÉOWYN'S BABY TALK=> She cannot pronunce her R's well (she's not even four, she'll learn)

Güzel Kardeşim

Year 31 of the Fourth Age of the Sun, Ithilien.

"Please, my lady, come back here!"

Esme, the children's governess, ran after the child as the lady Éowyn jumped into her brother's arms.

"Anárion Abim geldi!"

She squealed as he kissed the top of her head and held her tightly. "My angel, look at you. You're so beautiful." He smiled politely. "Good morning, Esme."

The governess bowed. "My lord."

"Would you mind if I stole her?"

"Oh no, not at all. She's been asking about you ever since we received word that you were coming. We were not expecting you."

"My grandfather has been tutoring me in politics and law for the past six months," he explained. "While I am so grateful for the help with which he kindly provides me and for all the wisdom he constantly feels compelled to share, I simply could not endure yet another month of endless lessons pertaining matters in which I have no particular interest. Therefore I...notified him I would spend some time with my mother and my siblings here in Emyn Arnen. He did not seem pleased, but he did not object either."

"Oh, my lord, if your mother heard about it..."

"I am sure she would understand. I have not visited her yet. Is she in good health?"

"Given her condition, I would say she is faring better than expected."

"Her condition?"

Esme frowned. "Have you not been told? Lord Eönwë had a letter sent to you several weeks ago."

"I received no letter."

"Oh...that is strange." She smiled. "Though it certainly explains why we did not hear from you. Your mother was so distressed she wept for a week. We feared she might lose the child."

"Esme?"

"Yes, my lord?"

"How many children do you think..."

The governess lowered her head. "It is not my place to speak of these things, my lord. It is a private matter and..."

"I am scared, Esme. What if...?"

"Oh, my lord, such things should not even be on your mind. Your mother is a strong woman. You have no reason to be anxious. Lord Eönwë will protect her. Do you doubt him?"

"Of course not. How could I? He raised me. He's my father. I trust him and, most importantly,I love him. He is the only father I remember, the only father I have ever had. But..."

"Do you like my hair, Abi?"

Éowyn had been tugging at Anárion's arm and was now pulling his hand. "Play, Abi."

"We'll play, my angel. And your hair is indeed beautiful."

She pulled his hand. "I run, you catch me."

Anárion sighed and caressed her cheek. "We will play later, is that alright? I would like to see mamma first. I say hi to her and then I come back here and we play. What do you say?"

"Awaight."

"Alright?"

Éowyn nodded. "I want to see mamma too!"

"Come with me then."

Éowyn raised her arms. "Up."

Anárion picked her up at once. "As my lady commands."

She giggled and nestled against him. "Abicim."

Esme glanced at the siblings and turned away. "Oh dear, I am going to cry." She took a deep breath. "May I talk to you privately, my lord?"

"What is it that you need to tell me? I should not like to leave my sister alone."

"What I am about to tell you concerns your sister and it is not for so young a child to hear."

"Very well. Who will attend on her whilst we speak? You are her only governess I know of."

"Many ladies happen to be fond of your sister. With your permission, I shall ask one of them to..."

"You shall not. I will not leave her in the hands of people I do not know. Must we really have this conversation? Please turn around and look at me. I care not whether your eyes are teary or puffy. Eru knows Gondor is in dire need of people capable of showing emotion."

Éowyn wrapped her tiny arms around her brother's neck. "I am bored, can we play? I changed my mind, no mamma."

Anárion briefly stared at Esme before he focused on his sister. "Do you no longer want to see mamma?"

"Annem yok."

Anárion frowned as he kissed her cheek. "What's wrong, angel?"

He ran his fingers through her hair. "Neden annemi görmek istemiyorsun?"

"Annem beni sevmiyor."

"Why would you say that? It is not true."

"It is. She never plays with me. She only yells at me. She never wants me around."

She clutched to him and her blue eyes—her father's eyes—filled with tears. "Mamma is mean."

"Would you like me to talk to her?"

Éowyn shook her head. "I want papa. And I want you to play with me. Papa had a big crown made for me. Want to see?"

"Do show me."

"YES!"

He put her down and watched her run to her bedroom. He turned to Esme. "Do speak. What is it that you wished to tell me? It has to do with my mother, does it not? Please send someone to keep my sister company. She needs to be watched. She's very young and..."

He was interrupted by a sharp cry. Both Esme and Anárion rushed into Éowyn's bedroom. The child was sitting on the floor, a split headpiece in her hands.

"It bwoke!!! Papa will be mad at me! I am sowwy!"

Anárion hugged her. "It is alright, my angel. It is alright."

"Papa gave it to me."

"I know." He played with her hair. "I know. It is alright."

"Papa gave me a necklace for my birthday, but I loved my big crown."

"It was a pretty tiara, my angel. Do not worry though. I am sure papa will have another one made. He will have countless bracelets, necklaces and rings made for his little princess."

"No, not a pwincess!" she retorted with a frown, "his sunshine. He always calls me güneşim, which means my sunshine."

"You are his sunshine. You are the sunshine of us all."

"But you said I am your angel."

"Yes," he smiled, "you are also my angel. Would you like to give me the tiara so that we can put it away?"

Éowyn hesitantly handed it to him and, in turn, he gave it to Esme. "Take care of it, will you?"

Esme bowed her head and curtsied before she left. Éowyn's glazed eyes widened.

"Where is she going? That's my crown! Is she thwowing it away? Papa gave it to me!"

"You cannot wear it, my angel. It is a beautiful tiara but..."

"I want it back, Abi. Can I have it back?"

"Wyn..."

"Ne olur..."

He helped her up. "I'll see what I can do."

"Would you like to see my necklace?"

"Of course. I would love to."

She let go of his hand and rushed to open a wooden trunk. She pulled out a jewelry box and gave it to her brother. Anárion carefully lifted the top and peeked inside.

"A golden necklace?"

Éowyn nodded. "Can you help me wear it?"

"As my lady commands."

He did as he was asked and the little girl hinted at a meek smile.

"Are you sad because of the tiara?"

Éowyn nodded. "Mamma also makes me sad."

Anárion hugged her. "I will talk to her."

"Söz mü?"

"Söz, güzel kardeşim. Söz."

He caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. The first time he had beheld her face, he had sworn he would protect her. He would keep her safe. He would protect her from everyone. If necessary, he would protect her even from her own family. From her mother. From their mother.

Enjoy this cute little edit I made, starring Archie Barnes as Anárion and Ayda Acar as Éowyn "Wyn".

Isn't she just adorable?

Additional tags:

@tolkienocweek

@lucifers-legions

@emmanuellececchi

@evenstaredits

@saurongorthaur9

@a-world-of-whimsy-5

@cilil

[year2000electronics]

i gotta say, despite your brozone world tour fanfic being VERY much an au it's probably got the best written brozone dynamic i've ever seen?? like not only branch being upset at his brothers and all of them being upset at JD, but the way they all realize how they hurt branch and make an effort to change without it being too melodramatic (just comedic dramatic with clay the one time lmao) and in turn branch realizing that they all had issues he couldn't see as a kid and him beginning to understand their reasons for leaving in the first place, all without diminishing anyone's feelings because they're all allowed to be upset!! it's REALLY good and something i've been starving to see in brozone fanworks lately (like, i enjoy branch blowing up at them all as much as the next guy, but it gets old after a while yk?). i think how you write them has gotta be one of my favorite ways i've seen them be characterized, despite how far removed they are from the actual movie's story LMAO. so excited to see how messy things get now that JD's back in the picture, keep up the awesome work!!

thank you so much!! that really means a lot to me because i care about the relationship brozone has a LOT <3 it's really not an enviable situation for ANY of them to be in, yknow?? like, all the bros were either late teens or adults in their brozone days and, like, yeah it's one thing for branch's perspective to be that his brothers all up and left him instantly in one day, but man it is ANOTHER thing for you, as a teen/young adult, your identity being irreversibly tied to four people that are starting to REALLY grind your gears- being just "a part of brozone", with a specific Label for how you should specifically be acting all the time.

like yeah! branch has every right to be mad at the bros! but its also sooo important to me to remember that these guys were an ENTIRELY different age bracket than bitty b, right, so like. HIS "you all up and left before i could grow up" is THEIR "i'm growing up and i still don't have any identity to my name besides 'the fun boy', 'the sensitive one', 'the heartthrob', 'the leader'"

and i think branch could be able to see that i truly do. i think the best thing for branch to hear from his brothers is not actually "so sorry branch we should have never left" but instead like. "yeah we did leave but we should have visited" or like "it was really important for our lives to change, but we're sorry that ended up having an unintentional negative impact on yours"

IT'S ALL ONE BIG BOY BAND ISSUES SOUP AND IT MAKES MY BRAIN'S GEARS SPIN LIKE CRAZYYY!!! and again i am super grateful for your kind words, i love writing for these bros so much ;0;

[eddiepumpkinpup]

Thinking of asking my partner to be my Cg >_< 🌷🕯️🐇

Bit of context: (Cw: trauma, rejection)

I've been dating him for 2 1/2 years, we've been living with each other basically since we've gotten together and we've been through a LOT already. :') We met understanding each other as cis, but I've helped him transition to be the man he is today as he helps me continue exploring gender fluidity. We've deen each other through our best and worst, have supported each other through trouble with our families, we work for each other, we rely on each other, and I would say we're very secure and I'm likely going to love him forever!

Throughout our relationship, however, he had rejected my age regression as he did not understand it as a coping skill and would tell me he'd rather have me find other outlets. Until recently, whenever I would bring it up or parts of it would show through, he'd become frustrated and explain that he didn't understand how regressing helps me or why I want to do it instead of addressing directly the problems that are causing me to find ways to cope. After some time watching him grow personally, feeling us become more secure with each other, and a really helpful session with my therapist, I recently was able to talk to him about it again and he is now very much accepting! :')

It's nice to not feel like I need to shove down these feelings to regress anymore, and while now I am grateful to have the security in our relationship to be able to whenever I need, I wish so badly to be able to share parts of it with him. He is very much affected by the unspeakably troubled childhood he grew up in. Although he's made a TON of progress on his own through different ways to heal, I so badly want to see what age regressing could do for him, I just don't know if he'd be able to. That's exactly why I think not only would it be great to have him as my Caregiver when I'm regressed (he would be my first one ever) I also know that playing that role can heal one's inner child in very similar ways to regressing! I've experienced it myself whenever I subtly cg for him during the moments he needs more support from me, and it's wonderful!

I don't expect things to go completely right from the start, and I'm not sure how many opportunities I'm going to have to be able to try different things with him, but I want to ask him... I want to ask him tomorrow!! I simply wanted to write my thoughts down before actually jumping into it. I hope you all wish me luck! I'll be sure to update how it goes ^_^

[gettothestabbing]

It is very puzzling to me

how many female friends have told me, as a method of reassuring me about being dumped via text, "He'll come back to you."

I don't want him to??

Outside of the specific context of him wanting to mend our relationship and apologizing for his unkind behavior and failure to communicate, I'm not even interested in speaking to him. And even in that context, I would just let him down gently, because there are unsustainable differences in our values that keep me from marrying/continuing to date him.

Just because my feelings were hurt by the breakup doesn't mean I'm pining for him. I know myself well enough to tell the difference between "I don't want to be single again / I don't like being blamed when someone else messes up" and "I'll never love again, he was the ONE"

Actually, I've moved on so hard that I'm now (1) going on a second date with someone else I met on eHarmony and (2) feeling kinda bad about it because I started crushing on a recently-dumped/mid-divorce coworker who I've become better friends with recently.

Which is, like, a whole other can of worms. My sis said that it's not wrong to date other people when the person you like is unavailable. But it still feels a bit wrong. I don't date for fun, I date to find a husband. If I don't feel like a relationship can become a marriage, I stop pursuing it, and I try to be upfront about that with the men I date.

Current ways this could go:

Dates go well, end up with new guy, stay friends with coworker and ignore crush until it goes away

Dates don't go well, stay friends with coworker and ignore crush until it goes away

Dates don't go well, stay friends with coworker, eventually my crush becomes mutual and we marry in our shared faith tradition and have adorable children

You can probably tell which one I'm quietly hoping for, and also which is the least likely. It's so rare to meet a guy who is CS AND conservative AND close in age AND lives near me. Plus he's smart and cute and a cat person and fun to talk to??? Who allowed this.

I actually had a crush on him when we first met a year ago at work. But as soon as he mentioned his wife, my brain turned off the crush, and I was so glad for that. And then his wife decided to divorce him because she's been cheating on him, and all he wants is someone to talk through it all with. He has decided I am that person. So I've gotten to know him way better than I ever did before the divorce. And he's kind of perfect in almost every way.

I hate myself for crushing on him right now. I'm working very hard to never ever act weird or indicate it to anyone. (I swore the friend who guessed to absolute secrecy, but she ships us anyway.) It makes me feel like a creep to like him when I just went through a breakup and while he's going through a messy divorce and some other personal stuff. But it also makes perfect sense that, as soon as I learned he was technically not single, my crush circuit turned back on.

Honestly, I'm grateful for the opportunity to talk to him more. I am learning a lot about being a good friend these past few years. That should be expanded to men again. Just because I had weird experiences with male friends in college doesn't mean I can never have a male friend again.

I'm just not going to focus on these feelings. I want to be a good friend to him. Wherever the crush gets in the way of that, it must be suppressed or redirected. i can keep working on self-improvement, on my career, and on helping out with family and community stuff. There are so many important things to do, good things that glorify God and help people tangibly. As much as I cherish and desire becoming a wife and mother, I know that these things do not and should not come first, especially not right now. And if I ever get to be either of these things, I will be grateful for the work I put in now to be better at those roles (by becoming healthier, a better friend, and a more well-rounded person).

[ripeteeth]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks for the tag, @another-lost-one!

How many works do you have on ao3?

106, all in. (105 under ripeteeth, 1 orphaned)

What's your total ao3 word count?

966,792. God, I'd love to hit 1 million before the end of the year, but that's extremely unlikely.

What fandoms do you write for?

Way too many. The main are: The Terror, MDZS, Disco Elysium, Harry Potter, Good Omens.

What are your top five fics by kudos?

Salinity (And Other Measurements of Brackish Water) [Good Omens]: 3094 how a resurrection really feels [Disco Elysium]: 1479 Vigil Strange [The Magnus Archives]: 1266 the art of asking your boss for a raise [Succession]: 1154 no son of mine [Beyond Evil]: 993

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to, but I get easily overwhelmed and sometimes don't. I feel awful about it, I'm so sorry. I am so grateful for every comment, truly.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I guess it depends what you consider angstier? I have some centered around grief and loss and some focused on fucked-up relationships and characters continuing to make choices that hurt them. It's kind of cheating to say Asterius is my choice, considering that I haven't published the end of it yet, but anyone familiar with the story of Theseus and the Minotaur should hear the beat of the story I'm telling there.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

For some reason, I think it's either The Passion or How A Resurrection Really Feels. A believable happiness feels the most relatable to me, and two middle-aged, damaged-but-still-here-godammit men finding a bit of comfort in the midst of all of it just feels right. Like a comfortable boiled wool jacket just a little big in the shoulders. The one that smells like your father's cologne. That kind of warmth.

Do you get hate on fics?

Yeah. It was really bad for awhile, and was the main reason I left Good Omens and turned off comments and orphaned Salinity. I'm pretty desensitized to it now.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write pretty much only smut. I don't know what I'd categorize it as other than that tbh.

Do you write crossovers?

No, never felt the interest.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, I don't think so.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah! It was a really cool experience and I felt really honored.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I've tried to but I'm terrible at it. It doesn't help that I've had terrible writer's block for the past several years though.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

I have no idea how to answer this. All of them I've ever shipped?

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Revachol Calling. God, I want to finish it so badly. There was a very specific something in me while I was writing it, and then a lot of everything happened. Anyway, I've lost it, that je ne sais quoi. I started replaying Disco Elysium again recently, so maybe it will come back. Here's hoping.

What are your writing strengths?

Imitation. Hearing the music in a sentence. Being fascinated by everything and bogging the reader down in necklaces of useless fact.

What are your writing weaknesses?

See above, turn it up to eleven.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?:

Not unless I'm reasonably fluent and confident in the language.

First fandom you wrote for:

Ghost Story, for Harry Potter, first posted in December 2018. It's surreal to think that it's been five years. What a strange five years.

Favorite Fic You've Written?

Either Revachol Calling (for Disco Elysium) or Blood, Bones, and Butter (for MDZS). I think there's something deeply personal about Revachol Calling that both makes me struggle with it but also resonate the most with it.

For Blood, Bones, and Butter, it was one of the more fun fics I've ever written and I really enjoyed being able to add layers to what the reader knew by simply adding an additional viewpoint, kinda triangulating their messy beginning through three men who are each extremely certain that they're correct. (Yeah, I'd watched Rashomon recently, why do you ask). That's the fascinating thing about songxuexiao for me, each of them is so certain they've got the others all figured out, but they're also all holding back aspects of their own interiority.

Either way, they're both important to me.

Tagging: @pearwaldorf, @et-in-arkadia, @danpuff-ao3, and anyone else who likes!