#so yeah i will be complaining abt shit that just annoys me bc everything else is just fucking sad

[enevera]

sorry abt the complaining tonight i have a headache and ibuprofen did jack shit so im like a little irritable

[yuukei-yikes]

Tell us about Shinaya’s breakup :D

HEHDJEIDNEKFJEKDKEK ive had this ask since i posted i was thinking abt it MAN i cannot express to u i just. I WANNA WRITE A FIC SO BAD but AUGH im so bad at it it makes me cringe i cant do that but its basically like all my damn posts together u know. i keep thinking of shintaro's disastrous relationships post str going from ayano to kano to takane etcetc sorry im playing with him like a stress toy making him go thru hell but its so fun

srry i dont wanna have to rewrite a lot of stuff so erm im liking this answer 🫡🫡🫡 and i could link a bunch more just so u SEE MY VISION... but i think linking that is enough. ON AND OFF SHINAYA MY BELOVED

shintaro and ayano sort of having this ridiculous relationship because both are hurting and jumped in a relationship too quick but fighting/being sad about stupid shit is so much easier than dealing with their actual issues that they've got with themselves. like focusing on each other and what they don't like about each other and their relationship is so much easier than crying about how suicidal they are. lollllll SO LIKE this insanity sort of saves them at the same time??

i mean the most ideal would be that instead of getting together they got therapy and the normal kind not the relationship kind. you know. but also theyre traumatized and ugh. its so much easier to resent each other than themselves. its so much easier to be petty. its such a relief to cry over relationship problems than over timeline resets or dead parents and etc. YOU GET ME?????

they keep breaking up and getting back together ridiculously like it is 1000% so dramatic each and everytime. ayano crying her eyes out like its the end of the world and shintaro making 100 sad playlists. and it happens at least monthly. the first time everyone's like WHOA THEY BROKE UP!?!? SHIT!! the second time its like heyyy maybe they'll work it out like last time!! third time its like are you joking. fourth time they're already begging them to stop. by they i mean the dan but especially takane by the way. who do you think is picking up the pieces.

and by the way the one breaking up all the time and being dramatic as hell is shintaro. he gets angry and annoyed and weaponizes the LETS BREAK UP thing because he DOESNT MEAN IT. like he knows he and ayano will work it out later. he gets comfortable again. not to get on the ayano surviving thing, but i think ayano (and hiyori but especially ayano) making it out alive undoes a big part of the message abt moving on. like i love her so im not complaining thats i love having her alive :3 but i like to translate this into shintaro like. he's intensely trying to repress/process all the memories of the other timelines to cope and have a normal life and ends up being this way because he's sort of self sabotaging himself. like ayano's alive and she likes me??? lol. ok?? ill wake up any moment now!! and he feels guilty and undeserving and is sort of a dickhead to her in an unconscious attempt of keeping her away because that's what he deserves according to him. also why he's accepting of takane's intense obsession with him lol bc she's familiar and she is comfortable, unlike ayano who is so rare and one in its kind in all the timelines. he is sort of terrified of her in a way.

the lets break up isnt rly a breakup. its just a leave me alone see u later. LOL i think we talk too much abt kanoshin bringing the worst in each other but what about shinaya. they do that too. yeah we CAN have fluffy shinaya. but like i said it is so easy to focus all this bitterness and sadness into each other and it's so relieving to be sad and angry about this rather than everything else. because this is sort of in their control while everything else isn't, wasn't. and its so unfair. of course its unfair!! but they cant do anything abt it. so they just go crazy on each other. ayano is DESPERATE to be needed. i could link more replies but i will hold myself back. basically her siblings are used to being alone/know she has her own problems and ayano is dealing with this emptiness and feeling of failure bc no one needs her, from her perspective her sacrifice still failed to save everyone, her parents are gone so she needs to step up. like she puts herself under all this pressure and feels Not Good Enough for ANYTHING. and she is dating shintaro.

it's EASY to bother him and try to get him to open up and etc so she ridiculously focuses on that. but it gets on shintaro's nerves to say the least LOL plus all his other issues i mentioned 🫡plus she keeps being like we have to be normal. lets kiss and hold hands and cuddle. but she's too embarrassed to say it/do it and shintaro is even more pathetic about it. so theyre both frustrated about everything and can barely even sit next to each other without acting insane.

AND SORRY BUT I WILL TALK ABT TAKANE🫡💞💗💖💝💕💘ofc. codependent shintaka. of course. it drives ayano CRAZY because on top of all their problems takane is able to talk sense into shintaro each and every single time. and she is soooo jealous like she knows its stupid but she cant help ittt i ALSO TALKED ABT THIS SORRY I KEEP REPEATING MYSELF IM JUST SO CRzy abt it. hehe......the whole mess bringing drama to harutaka too bc shintaro and ayano are so messy theyre contagious is so fun to me. when it comes to shintaro and takane's horrible relationship both their romantic relationships suffer for it but deal with it completely differently. while both haruka and ayano deal with jealousy somewhat, ayano is so hurt and already at the verge of a mental breakdown so she's focusing so many negative emotions on it and AGAIN it just serves as another point of argument between shintaro and ayano while haruka is like. his mental state isnt as convoluted as ayanos, he's rather freaking out and terrified of being left alone. THIS IS ABT SHINAYA so i wont get into harutaka side but lol. heh. Looks at it. zooms in it. like what i mean is that haruka and takane talk and work through it and are like sighs yeah...this is messed up while shintaro and ayano are using it against each other instead of working on it LMAO

ANYWAYS. ayano breaks up with shintaro. vine boom. total breakdown moment like everyone out of the room i wanna talk to you alone. and this time its for REAL. like ayano isnt confrontational at all, all their arguments are always her being pushy abt idk mental health and shintaro's like godddd STOPPPPP and ayano crying and shintaro being like I CANNOT DEAL WITH THAT. IM SORRY I GUESS. CAN U GET OUT OF THE ROOM. WE'LL TALK LATER. but he also sucks so bad at letting the other person know they can count on him so he kind of assumes ayano will do it when she's ready because he KNOWS she's in pain. like. ofc it could go well. ofc shintaro and ayano could work through everything with kindness and comprehension for each other but they're both so sad and suddenly find themselves annoyed at each other one time and it felt so freeing to do that that they just keep doing it. especially shintaro. having ayano be mad at him is sort of relieving because he feels undeserving of her and its like yeah. Yeah!! i know its ooc but shinaya screaming match.god. sorry but all their bottled up emotions abt everything and they take it out on each other for no reason other than theyre giving each other the space and it plays out that way. theyre acting crazy about something so stupid like shintaro not wanting ayano to wear his clothes or whatever. like they scream about that but its not about that. it just feels so good to scream. it feels so good to scream and let it out even if they haven't given themselves the time to process that theyre not... actually screaming abt that at all. theyre screaming about everything else. not even about each other. its about themselves. its always been.its never been about each other. when it is, its stupid. thats why they do it. its just easier. God. they were just not ready for a relationship, especially not one with each other out of all people.

ayano breaks first, therefore dumps shintaro lol. he goes thru his own fucked up arc afterwards while ayano gets help. my man spirals DOWN. whether they get back together or not depends on my mood 🤨 but if they do, its by the time theyre in their mid twenties or something so a few years later LOL i picture them dating like for over a year maybe?? when theyre 18/19. hehe.

like. do you get it.

[scarletanpan]

.

Ik it was a joke but my sister going 'moms gonna kill me if u develop an eating disorder in my house' like. Girl the ships sailed. If were being fr I don't think I've had a normal relationship w food since I was like. 7, or ever rlly. And then when ur body stops telling u when ur hungry u go between barely eating for 1-2 days to spending another day dead inside bc everything u do eat makes u rlly fucking tired and feel like shit and not wanna work so fucked up

Ppl on adderrall might be gods strongest soldiers. Like wtf how the hell do u eat Anything w/o feeling hungry I didn't think I relied on my body needing to tell me things sm but like. If I'm not hungry most of the time even stuff I usually like feels. Physically difficult to consume the process of eating is so annoying like. U gotta pick something that won't make u feel pain in an hr, eat enough of it that u don't get rlly hungry and tired and annoyed halfway thru ur shift, and then u gotta eat it in a normal amt of time so u don't waste 90 mins in ur car every morning and not even manage to finish what u got bc there is something deeply wrong w u like. More than half the reason I cant function rn

Worst part is quite literally it wouldn't be this bad if I lived by myself bc the only reason I don't grocery shop often or cook food is bc as much as I love her I don't like.. existing in the same space for too long. Like yeah immense guilt abt being a worthless human whose living off someone else while making 0 improvements to their own life, but also I don't think I could bc. Idk I love her but sometimes I feel too autistic to talk to her for too long w/o getting bothered by Something like.. she takes care of me i swear but also v much has a i dont give a shit abt anyone attitude and does Not mind getting me rlly upset for a joke ik its stupid but. Every time it happens shes the one who looks at me like I'm the gross creature for having feelings when u do or say things to me and i take it literally. And shes been extra weird since I had a breakdown after she did it over my moms house... i apologized and said that part wasnt her fault a thousand times, but she didnt even try to acknowledge she did anything, just stared at me like im an idiot and said nothing the whole time like

Why dont I just drown myself actually itd be fine if its every once and a while, but ik if i rlly started shopping and cooking we'd be around each other constantly bc shes always downstairs on the big tv. It's so stupid im not scared of my sister but I kinda am bc she does so much messing w me and vaguely judging me jokingly never talking to me abt how she actually feels abt anything ever even when i ask its rlly frustrating and makes me wanna die I wish should could be more normal abt shit around me.. like yeah ik u hated me to the point of shoving me into the wall every time u passed me when we were kids but can u. Get over it? I was so glad when things started getting better, but she still never Actually talks to me. even cancelled our weekly sister meetings where all we did was complain abt anime we dont watch anyway bc of work even tho shes still home when we usually do it now but idc anymore its fine. Idk like cooking too it makes me happy actually its the one thing i can do pretty easily I rlly wish I could and not worry abt every fucking thing else its such a dumb reason too . It should not be why I can barely keep up with anything physically rn I just hate myself m so fucking incompetent if I told anyone why they would think im just stupid. Or need to grow thicker skin or stop having anxiety abt everything I am one bad comment away from . Something idfk but for my mental health I can't just suck it up and get made fun of for trying to make food and happening to be weird abt it I can't fucking help it. It's so frustrating knowing everyone kno2s u have autism and adhd and still treat u with the same judgment of weirdness and derision if not more how about aby of u learn to be fucking normal abt me I've spent my whole life forcing myself to do it for everyone else I just want idk.. not this

[purinfelix]

sassy men apocalypse - football edition ☆

summary: some short hcs abt the football players i think would make the sassiest bfs ft: joao felix, jude bellingham, trent alexander-arnold, andrew robertson warnings: none, just the boys being little shits

a/n: this is so stupid but i'm obsessed with sassy men ok shoot me !!! also this is not anywhere near all of the players i think would make sassy bfs so feel free to comment/send asks abt who else u think would fit 🤭

joão félix

✦ I know y'all have seen this man on field beefing with EVERYONE... the other team, refs, even his own teammates like you cannot tell me he would not be the absolute sassiest boyfriend ever ...

✦ Sometimes you'll try to take candid selfies with him and he'll just be giving you the nastiest stink eye ever - and not even on purpose that's just his default expression

✦ Will whine and complain when you drag him out on shopping trips but then gets weirdly into it and starts giving you advice

"Hold on, I just need to get a new toner," you say to him, as he trails behind you while holding half a dozen shopping bags. "Ugh, can we just go home al- Don't get that one, the ingredients in it will dry out your skin."

✦ For that reason he's also weirdly into USING your skincare products and esp whatever lip balm you use just bc it "works better"

✦ And the attitude only gets worse whenever he gets sick ...

✦ #1 Manflu victim like you'll come home to him spread eagle on the couch, hacking and gagging and weak and you'll think he has some virus but in reality, it's just a cold

✦ That won't stop him from spending the next couple of days coughing extremely loudly and filling every silent moment with sniffles - all the while giving you immense attitude when u try to get him to rest or take medicine

✦ Don't worry though, this attitude immediately disappears the minute he wants cuddles and then all of a sudden he's the nicest, sweetest boyfriend ever (of course he's going to whip out the puppy eyes, he knows your weaknesses after all)

jude bellingham

✦ Does this even need to be said

✦ The absolute quickest with comebacks, and a little too good at insults

✦ Such a little shit honestly like he just lives to annoy you sometimes

✦ I said this in the tags of one of my other posts, but he is so the kind to do dumb little things like spam your phone with dumb selfies if you leave it unattended around him, then acts clueless when you get back

"Jude, what's this." "Huh, how'd those get there?" You watch him rub the back of his nape while avoiding eye contact. "In that case, I'm making it your new contact picture." "HEY, DON'T."

✦ There is a payoff though, because he is the best at taking pictures for you like he knows all the good angles and poses

✦ Once laughed at you for tripping over a rock but then while he was turning to laugh at you he tripped into a puddle and had to walk all the way home with wet pants

trent alexander-arnold

✦ Just SO competitive about everything

✦ Like you've seen him in those challenges he hates losing and this extends to your everyday conversations in which he'll NEVER admit he's wrong

"Trent, I'm not saying I don't like cookie dough, I'm just saying that mint choc chip is better." It's night and you're lying in bed with him and somehow started discussing ice-cream flavours. "How on earth can you say that? It tastes like toothpaste!" "Toothpaste!? It's refreshing, I've got no clue what you're on about." "I feel personally offended, I don't know if we can keep dating after this." You burst out into laughter as he turns to face his back to you, pulling the entirety of your shared blanket with him.

✦ You know how people say boys will do anything if you tell them you'll time them? Yeah.

✦ Once you tried to get him to finish your leftovers at a fancy dinner by telling him you'd time him but this backfired when you had to rush him home after he got heartburn from eating too fast

✦ And the worst part is that you forgot to time him - he would've been so mad if he wasn't too busy chugging Mylanta

✦ A gossipy little bitch. Spills ALL of the team tea to you and will also get way too into your own gossip - he's your own confidante and is absolutely prepared to give you all the reactions you need

andrew robertson

✦ Okay i reckon he's probably the sweetest out of the bunch but that does not mean he is not a sassy little shit okay!!!

✦ The kind of guy who only knows how to cook like three dishes but whenever it's his turn to cook the kitchen is OFF LIMITS to anyone but him

✦ Like you'll try to be cute and couple-y by cooking together but he's running that shit like the navy, got five pots going at once and a kitchen towel thrown over his shoulder

✦ Still manages to undercook his pasta though, although he'd rather eat crunchy pasta than admit he's wrong

✦ gets irritated by your social media antics because he refuses to admit he cares about it too

"Wait, don't touch the food yet I want to take a picture." You hold your hand out to pause your boyfriend who's already reaching for his fork, causing him to groan loudly. "Cmon already, I'm starving!" He pauses for a bit, watching you tilt your phone to get all the angles but then chiming in, "Wait, give me the phone it'll look better from my angle."

✦ And if you think you're escaping his sassiness over text ?? you're dead wrong because he is a chronic '🙄' and '😒' user

[auckie]

i was in AP throughout hs, and it was almost fully populated by kids w wealth n white privilege (self included). I used to have a huge chip on my shoulder abt being one of the only disabled kids in there n how it taught me to obliterate my own accessibility needs. I think acknowledging that gifted / ap programs breed ableism is important, but MUCH less so than dealing w/ the fact that the programs' existences are built on excluding those without access to whiteness or wealth.

SAME WITH ME MAN! Literally I was, and still sometimes am like ‘if I’m autistic and can do this then anyone can too’ without realizing that I only got into those classes bc basically everyone who got along with the teachers did— which is to say only the problem kids, the poorer, browner ones who tended to hang out together and forgo after school bs or weird cult like fundraising organizational projects, did not. I had a huge stick up my ass planted there by the fear of being seen as poor and Mexican, and I lost it around the time hs rolled around but I already had a complex at that point, and no amount of weed or apathy about college could really dislodge the chip till I realized I was buying into the bootstrap ideaology my self loathing brown mom pushed on me, to my own extreme detriment. Like yeah I was poor and stupid and r slur but the suits told me I was gifted like everyone else bc I kept my nose clean lol. I’d be lying if the term didn’t annoy me tho, like I do really get sick of ppl complaining about it but it’s bc I think they make the wrong conclusion for the sake of self pity. It’s harder for me to feel shitty about it now that I know literally every American kid and their mom went through the same shtick yknow? Now it’s sorta validating and I just shrug and hope we can dismantle everything that causes it before I decide to pop a kid out and unwittingly force them into such a shit system

[gontagokuhara]

you should tell us abt ur fangan kids!

ive been meaning to answer this but itz long so i wanted to put it under a cut!!

hibiki (he/they) is the ultimate demolitionist! i cant draw but his design and whole aesthetic is literally just. minecraft creepercore. they’re 4′10″, they wear full-eye black contacts bc Crepper Aesthetic, and he just. likes to blow shit up. he’s the rival in my group killing game and i love him SO much

yuri (he/him) is 100% my kinnie oc as the ultimate camp counselor. despite being very good at what he does (duh), he hates it. the responsibility of having to maintain the fun and safety of a bunch of kids is shaving years off his lifespan. and, amazingly for him, he immediately gets assigned Group Dad against his will during the killing game. he also carries at least four fanny packs at all times, each containing snacks and capri suns, first aid supplies, arts and craft supplies, and a fucking tazer (which he usually threatens to use against hibiki). 

kimi (she/her) is the ultimate candy maker! her entire aesthetic is cotton candy, in which her hair is dyed blue and pink, she likes soft, puffy clothing, and she’s just a really sweet (ha) person in general! she gets along with most all of her classmates bar a few. she has lesbian disease also

miyah (she/her) is the ultimate witch, which sounds really cool, until she opens her mouth and you realize she’s the crystal-wielding, essential oil-drinking, anti vax queen you were warned about. she’s very sweet and very soft spoken, and genuinely tries to be kind to everyone, but she’s very much a you love her or hate her kind of personality.

koya (they/them) is the ultimate swashbuckler! swashbucklers are a hero archetype defined by flamboyant movement, sword-wielding, chivalry, and daring adventures. koya is a sea-faring spirit, and they fill their time in the killing game enthralling the others with stories of grandeur and convincing all of their classmates that they are a legit pirate. koya is a liar, they exaggerate…a lot, but their intentions are not malicious and their tales just come out a bit more romantic than they actually happened. they’re very charming and laid back, and they’re definitely the sort of heartthrob character that everyone wants to smooch. 

chieko (they/them) is the ultimate girl gang leader, and they are also ultimate lesbian. they’re sort of isolated from the rest of the group due to their talent being considered scary, and their very intense and intimidating appearance and personality. they’re major concern is to escape the killing game and find their way back to their girls (they say as much, which makes everyone VERY suspicious!) but they wouldnt hurt anyone and they end up becoming best friends with yuri and masako (who i’ve lovingly dubbed the parent squad of this class)

speaking of masako (she/they), she is the ultimate investigative journalist, and this killing game’s trial helper! she is very well traveled, and takes what she does very seriously. they are completely and utterly devoted to the truth, good or bad, they will find the truth. they absolutely detest koya for this reason; even little lies absolutely grind masako’s gears. she also is very distrustful, and she doesn’t trust anyone at the onset of the killing game. it takes her a long time to warm up enough to the protag to share her findings during investigations, and she often comes across as somewhat of a rival during trials due to her critical nature and the way she very blatantly does not trust those around her. nevertheless, later on she is (against her will) forced into the Parent Squad with chieko and yuri, and though she doesn’t trust anyone else, she will do everything in her power to keep more killings from happening. 

daichi (he/him) is the ultimate superhero, and he was the first dr oc i actually made!! he’s very much a pretty boy (fluffy blonde hair, pink eyes, freckles, he’s just Cute) and he and hibiki start dating during the killing game! he’s sort of a bastard and won’t give anyone a straight answer on what his superpowers actually are, but despite his kind, cheeky nature, he feels a deep sense of responsibility and guilt over not being able to do anything about the killing game. he is one of the more likely people to go snooping for the mastermind, and he’s gotten in physical fights more than once with people he deems suspicious. 

hirohito (he/him) is the ultimate joggler and he’s the greatest character of all time. what is joggling, you ask? don’t worry, he’ll tell you. i came across this while looking for talent ideas, and i laughed so hard i cried when i conceptualized this fiend. he’s very much the token joke character, he’s a hot head, and he’s kind of a dick, but the idea of hope’s peak allowing the ultimate person who can juggle and jog at the same time into their doors is just too hilarious to pass up. protag joggler 4 life

speaking of people who are kind of dicks, meet yuuto (he/him), the ultimate dancer. he’s such a hot head. he hates the most of his classmates out of any other character, including the mastermind. he’s dating the protag, who is one of like…four people he actually likes in his class. yuuto takes his talent very seriously, and spends hours every day working to maintain his status as the best of the best. his talent comes before everything else (or, at least, it did), but if his talent comes first, then the people he cares about take up every other place on the list. he doesn’t tolerate many people, but those he does, he is fiercely loyal towards. he would kill and die for the people he cares about. he is 5′2″ of pure kickass, and he will throw everything he has into defending the people he loves. i lvoe him.

michiko (she/her) is the ultimate influencer (yeah. i know). she’s an internet personality who has followings on instagram, twitter, youtube, tiktok, et cetera. she is also one of my earlier oc designs, and i’m kind of attached to her lol. she’s very naturally magnetic and has a lot of friends among her classmates, but she does have a tendency to get hung up on things like follower counts, conventional beauty, and wealth. she has a huge (mutual!) crush on koya, she’s best friends with hibiki, and she has an intense fear of swimming pools (her hair is dyed, and chlorine is way bad for dyed hair)

leeanne (she/her) is the only non-japanese character, and i. she’s a mess. she’s the ultimate theatre kid, and she’s basically every broadway tumblr user when h*milton was super popular. she complains about musical bootlegs, becries her classmates for not knowing anything about the musicals she stans, and she’s just. lord. obviously she’s a joke character, and she’s honestly a caricature of the kind of shit i got up to (to a degree! don’t call me out sdkjdsjbd) when i was 15 years old. suffice to say, none of her classmates like her very much

tomoya (he/him) is the obligatory ultimate ???, and also our trial ruiner! he earns the distrust of his entire class by keeping his talent a secret and then having it revealed by masako, and as a result he is very outcasted and lonely among his peers. he’s a naturally very reserved person, and his situation lends him to feeling very lonely. most of the class suspect him to be the mastermind – whether they’re right or not, only time will tell. 

katsumi (she/her) is 1/3 of what i’ve dubbed the Showbiz Squad as the ultimate pageant queen! she’s been participating in and winning beauty pageants since she was very young, and she’s won all the way up through the pageant ranks. as one would expect she’s very beautiful, and she’s also very bright and charismatic, which lends itself well to gaining allies in the killing game. she is by and large very fake, though, and she operates as a mini antagonist for various reasons. 

hikaru (he/him) is another third of the Showbiz Squad, as the ultimate game show host! he’s very ostentatious and charismatic; he’s always ‘on,’ always playing the gracious, enthusiastic host. there’s always a smile and a flashy, charming quip in his mouth, so he can wear very gratingly on the less enthusiastic and personable kids. he definitely would be a tumblr sexyman if he were an actual dr character {sweating emoji]. despite the crowd he seems to gather wherever he goes, no one knows much about him; and he likes to keep it that way. 

and finally, the last third of the Showbiz Squad, and also the protagonist: hachi (he/they), the ultimate child star! as their talent would indicate, hachi was a child star, and he absolutely detests the showbusiness world as a result. he really dislike pretty much…everyone who represents that part of his past (katsumi, hikaru, and michiko are prime examples) and his least favorite thing is getting the question: “omg where you in ___?” they’re very emotionally and physically fatigued by all the bullshit going on around them, so they come across as fairly apathetic to most people. but in actuality, hachi is someone who craves stability and kindness, and their extremely blunt, extremely annoyed exterior hides a very soft, compassionate interior. i absolutely adore this character :D

and umm thats it for my kids! i (for the most part?) have all of the killers/victims worked out, i have my mastermind all planned, but i’m still working on a setting/obligatory extra mono-creature/how this group falls within the dr canon. i love talking about these guys so if ur interest in them pwease send me asks/messages about them 🥺

[minblush]

k-armys are spreading a tweet namjoon made in 2013 about korean independence where he says 'There is no future for people who have forgotten history' which shows he probably won't agree with working with a japanese imperialist, hopefully he still has this attitude in 2018 twitter(.)com/BTS_twt/status/367906282012831744

yeah i have seen them doing that ;; and fancafe and all the official tweets since then have been flooded with people talking about these things too, but bighit is playing dead fish so far :(

microwavehater said:Am i the only one who never believed that bts has ~creative freedom~ (anymore) ? If they (still) had, they’d use their influence to spread msgs like baepsae, not just love urself uwu (considering yoongi made political pre-debut releases &interview stuff) Also, their newer releases (LY her onwards) are v much lacking in the hiphop department which (i assume) was a marketing choice. Hiphop just doesn’t sell as well to a female audience (along w the fact that vocalists are the face of BTS).

i think they still have creative input but creative freedom definitely not, but it’s debatable if they ever had it anyway? idk.. and them moving on from hip-hop was definitely both trying to change things up as well as appeal to a broader audience, love yourself era overall was an attempt to basically touch as many people as possible, i don’t mind them changing their musical direction but what has bothered me was the loss of their involvement (because it is less)

Anonymous said:I totally agree with you about BTS losing their originality. I’m almost starting to get annoyed of them. Now bc they know people love their music for its topics such as mental health, etc I almost feel like they’re thinking that they’re obliged to constantly write music that only has a “social” message. I did not like Idol at all. It was pretty tacky and the idea of loving yourself seemed so forced in the lyrics. I want them to make songs about whatever they want at that moment. (1/?)

Anonymous said:Also every fan keeps saying the same thing about them being unfiltered when actually they’ve become SO filtered now. They’ve almost created this illusion of being super open with us when actually we barely know anything about them. I don’t mind that but I hate how they’re touting that as something that applies to them. Honestly most fans now are the bandwagon type and the fandom is starting to feel more like a cult versus a community like it used to. (2/2)

i don’t know if i ever talked about them losing their originality? because originality is debatable in this case too, if you mean their original intention then yes i agree with that, and i agree they definitely created the illusion, once i got out of the bts bubble a bit and also thought back to the old days, i realized how closed off and filtered everything is comparison to the past and even to other kpop groups nowadays that are way more direct, i feel like even exo is more outspoken these days and direct with their fans which i thought could never happen??? i used to stan them and it was hell hah.. and these days.. wowza..

Anonymous said:Fuck yesss we need new yoongi mixtape and i agree abt what you said i wish bts could read that and be like okay guys i think they are right we have done some questionable things and shit has to be addressed whether we like it or not and just fucking do so. Some fans will drop but some would drop anyway bc it is getting out of hand i would never want to call bts problematic bc shit i cannot imagine that being true but them supporting problematic people is kind of making them ones

i just feel like nothing will change because bang pd is too greedy.. he really is eyeing like building a global empire with all the business deals he has been making.. also bts have done plenty “problematic” things themselves, though not to that extent, but some of their actions have hurt a lot of people too, but it depends on what bothers you, i find colorism and things like that a problem, but ofc definitely different thing than pedophilia and such, i just meant to say that nobody is perfect

Anonymous said:Do you ever just wanna randomly bump into bts and be like “hey lets talk!” And then tell them about all these issues and fandom drama and just tell them to wake the hell up? Cos I do haha

well even if we bumped into them, most of them wouldn’t talk to you so dkajsdka

Anonymous said:i agree with everything you have said but what bothers me is he is a co produce of produce 48 and nobody really complained about it even though he is know for sexualizing minors... or did i miss something?? also i feel sorry for you getting hate you were just saying your opinion and people should start to accept some facts! it's not the first time bighit did something questionable ://

oh but actually when that was announced there was backlash? i remember seeing complaints about the producer as well as some of the trainees due to their supposed right wing associations, there were also complaints about women’s rights cause of the oversexualization of some of the girls back in japan and the producer’s lyrics, i think this backlash seems bigger or more visible to you because it’s happening in your fandom ;; that season of produce even ended up having the lowest rankings and voting participation so :/

Anonymous said:I have three words to describe the part of the fandom that blindly accepts all the things, even the problematic ones, BTS do. 'Situationally woke cult'.

that fits perfectly

Anonymous said:i rly appreciate sou voicing your thoughts even if they r not in essay form or refined for days. I agree with you on many things but at the same time it's not as disappointing to me bc I guess I never held them to high standards. like in the beginning I could kinda imagine that they were somewhat sincere (but still remained sceptical) but the more they got famous the more I accepted that that sincerity and authenticity would stop bc that's just the kind of business that kpop is... (♤)

Anonymous said:like it's an inherently dishonest industry. they sell an image just like everyone else, and at best(!!) they were as real as possible with us in the beginning. no doubt they wanted to be different from everyone else and it was easier as long as not that many people gave a fuck about them. but as soon as they started to this chance was over. so i guess what I'm saying is that my view didn't change and I'm not surprised, because I never really bought what they were trying to sell...(♤)

Anonymous said:I still love them, theyre likeable & adorable boys. but theyre not changing the world. they're not in the right kind of industry for that. they love their luxury expensive stuff & the glamour of it all & that's okay. I just take every concept the whip out w/ a grain of salt & a knowing smile & enjoy the entertainment. that's just my own two cents that nobody in the fandom wants to hear so I'm bothering u. & its not an analysis or anything just what is on top of my mind while watching TV lol (♤)

Anonymous said:(♤) oh ps. except for that whole controversial stuff with that misogynist jpn songwriter and supreme boy and what not. I take that seriously , I wont act as if that's just a cute quirk. but they're men so I didn't expect much lmaoo. I knew that those kind of disappointments are just part of the deal ever since I learned that jimin (a whole cutie pie and my ultimate bias) stans chris brown. definitely would kick jm in the shin for that if I ever got to meet him. at least keep it to yourself lol.

haha i wish you didn’t start this with a backhanded compliment but dkajsd yeah overall i see your point and agree... i understand like if you didn’t buy into that whole spiel, then of course you can just keep on going and stanning them as idols and all that comes with that, but many people and me included sincerely thought that they were different, i have stopped stanning kpop groups for a while and got drawn back in with bts because i felt they were so fresh and unique, genuine and open with fans in comparison to other groups i have stanned.. but ofc that image crumbled as time went on.. things have changed as well... and i agree, it’s fine to enjoy it for just the entertainment and like the boys as people, accepting they are just as any other idol.. and maybe i will continue with that perspective myself!! but i honestly find it difficult having believed in it and also bighit continually selling this image to their fans despite evidence of the contrary, i can deal with idol business but like continually being blatantly lied to and then being in a fandom where most of the rhetoric is build around blindly believing it and eating anything the boys and bighit sells? it’s honestly emotionally exhausting sometimes.. but yeah.. you’re honestly right.. even with the last point lol... they are men, and korean men at that sigh.. that’s why i’m burying myself in girl groups nowadays adkjsd to heal my soul

Anonymous said:Hope you have a wonderful day filled with only good things ❤ - the cutest person in the world

thank you so so so so much! you have a wonderful day too ♥ cutie

Anonymous said:simple question, not loaded at all, no wrong answer, the honest answer is the right answer- yaddah yaddah you get it -what do you think bangtan is lying about and what exactly are you saying overall? i just need the language simplified for my 3 braincells :) if i do get what you're saying - whether the actual members of bts are real or not, their message is. "dont let anyone tell you what to do" "live your own life and not a borrowed dream" "life is a marathon, not a race - go your own pace"etc

you can read this post as well as the tags to it to see some of the examples, i mean i have been saying lots of things so i don’t know what exactly you want me to clarify? i think their message is compromised when their actions contradict it, whether it’s their actions or bighit’s is up to debate, like i was talking about in the post though, you can’t have things both ways, can’t hail the boys as woke independent kings while propagating the idea that they are just the company’s pawns at the same time, if you accept their authenticity isn’t there then ofc it’s a different argument, and the things you have listed there may be true, but isn’t is soured knowing they are just things that are said in order to sell bangtan as a product to you? to me they are

Anonymous said:I'm not gonna disagree but I like to see all the sides of a story. Bang pd is their boss, bts made a contract with him, he will ALWAYS have the last word on, well, everything they put out. We like to think that bc bts has creative freedom they can do whatever they want, well obviously they can't. Even if bts wanted to talk more about issues and not work w bad ppl, bang pd wants them to succeed, he wants to make money bc it's his business and bts is the only thing bringing money to it.

i get this argument a lot and to that i will answer again this and this, i don’t understand what your point is exactly though, so you are saying bts are pawns that have to do as they ceo says, yes and? i am criticizing the decision he has made? i’m criticizing that what he cares about the most is money? that he will stop at nothing to widen his wealth and influence? i will not support bts cooperating with vile people just because it wasn’t -completely their decision-, i’m sorry i’m really struggling to see what your point is about the other side of the story, it’s a shitty situation and if they all go through with it, it be greatly disappointing

[troglobite]

okay typing this up for myself bc holy shit

that thing i just reblogged made me realize a potential reason i hate compliments

this is going. to sound shitty and braggy for a minute. let us all reset assured, i am kind of a fuck up, i’m dropping out of grad school after a year, and i’ve never done anything traditional, i’m not good at most things and i’ve never had a real job. so.

.....okay i just insulted myself a lot and that’s not helping.

so that ‘love language is what you didn’t get as a kid’

you know what i got all the time?

HIGH EXPECTATIONS.

high expectations and COMPLIMENTS.

i was told i was innately smart, mature, capable, teachers loved me, friends would compliment me about that genuinely but also jealously or angrily or mockingly

and i think. i knew that behind every compliment was the threat of love/support being taken away.

friends would compliment me one day and then the next fucking hate me. or choose someone else over me. or explain why i was annoying.

compliments were CONDITIONAL.

when things were hard i was told other people had it harder so i should stop complaining

i over compensated and was rewarded for that

compliments have never been good or genuine for me

they come with conditions they come with subtext that says ‘me loving and supporting you is totally dependent upon performance’ or even subtext that says ‘i don’t necessarily mean this as a good thing, there are more things about you that i DON’T like’

i don’t like or trust compliments.

they always feel sketchy and backhanded.

i feel STUPID when i take a compliment and let it make me feel good. bc then i’m just like ‘wow you dumbass, they weren’t serious, there’s something else going on’

i can’t ever believe anything good abt myself like this bc i “know” that it’s a manipulative ploy

and wow that’s a genuinely fucked up thing to realize in the middle of High Anxiety during self quarantining in a fucking pandemic, y’all

but i can’t believe that fucking post w a john mulaney reaction image finally cracked the code and. now i get it.

and what makes me mad is, again, it doesn’t come FROM ME. there’s nothing IN ME that ~just doesn’t like compliments~ or ~wow i’m so fucked up can’t i just take a compliment~

no, i can’t, bc ppl have never allowed me to for 25 years of life

even compliments from my mom i can’t trust bc she has lied (or what i interpreted/felt was lying based on empirical evidence i saw as contradictory) and she has a Mom’s Belief in me which makes it seem to me that she doesn’t really See my circumstances, so it feels like a lie either way.

but yeah this. explains a lot abt how uptight and anxious i am about letting people down, particularly teachers. 

if i did anything wrong they were SHOCKED and SURPRISED and DISAPPOINTED in me more than the other kids they ~expected bad things of~ (which causes its OWN entire fucked up complex for people as they grow older, believe me i get that)

anyway.

bc words of affirmation is a love language, and i LOATHE IT. never tell me good things about myself unless it’s a matter of fact conversation where we can easily move on or can equally critique myself honestly.

my love language? quality time and physical affection.

i got some okay quality time as a kid. i loved it the most, but it was always tense bc no one got along for very long.

and physical affection. this is like so cheesy and stereotypical it borders on satirical/parodical but: i didn’t get enough hugs as a kid. my parents never AVOIDED it (the way john oliver jokes about english parents), but my mom didn’t get it, herself, and she has a lot of hang ups about physical touch.

and my dad was. my dad. a narcissistic whose affection was purportedly undying and unconditional but who absolutely put conditions on everything to do with love and support and affection.

so when it comes to compliments. like. my dad is probably also a source of that. with him, though, it was that he would only compliment or reward me when i did or said or thought something in line with what he perceived as Right. anything outside of that got no validation. 

//shrug

anyway.

i’m a physical affection person despite having ocd. if there’s someone i trust to be as fastidiously clean and conscientious as me (like my mom) i crave constant physical affection. my poor mom tries to put up with it for me but yeah she’s not about that life.

and being gay and trans/genderqueer i also grew up receiving little to no physical affection from the majority of my friends. it was ~weird~ bc people always assumed i was a creepy lesbian, even some ppl who were my friends (they weren’t rude about it, but they avoided touching me or instigating hugs, etc.--i noticed). ppl avoided me at all costs. i have a really upsetting memory burned into my brain from freshman year of high school that involves this and //shrug. yeah. 

anyway. here we are.

i finally figured it out.

now the question is what the fuck do i do with that.

ETA:

i realized that therefore i don’t believe in the validity of words, i really only value and trust Actions (and i’m working on trusting some actions more)

but this is why i flip out so fucking hard when my friends avoid me

they can SAY they love me all they want but i’m not going to believe it until i SEE the proof

and it doesn’t have to be A LOT but when i see them WALKING IT BACK with their actions rather than DEMONSTRATING it, i lose my mind

and my friends are compliment/validation MACHINES and i HATE IT. i will absolutely do it for them bc i believe it and i don’t lie abt that shit.

but i need. proof. not huge demonstrations.

but like. the two nights we spent playing pokemon all together? proved to me more than them saying ‘love and miss you!’

they’re also BAD with words for me. their actions never include checking in on me which is what i crave most and try to do for them without being overbearing (bc that’s something i’ve been taught that i am)

i’ve known that SOMETHING was up all this time and i realize

i didn’t know what i needed and i therefore didn’t know what it was they weren’t providing and how to fix that

and likewise i love them so much that i’m TERRIFIED of losing them and i’m deeply insecure bc i don’t want more compliments, i want actionable things. i want proof. i want demonstrations that they actually like/love me and want me around. and that’s hard to do long distance, but it IS doable. 

and the work on my end is to 1. verbalize this now that i know 2. work on accepting demonstrations of love/care for longer periods of time and trusting them more than i do already (bc the seeming lack of validity in their words bleeds into how i interpret their actions)

[rmyeol-blog]

ya’ll im sweATING right now bc i have been ASLEEP AND MISSING OUT ON IT ALL but IM HERE NOW ALDKSJFAAF anyway hey, im not complaining :’)))) i’m paige and i will be playing yeol, resident alpha member w a need to please and succeed in everything that he does (otherwise his world begins to crumble and he gets annoyed and legit he is the biggest drama queen sometimes he will act like the world has ended bc he got a subpar grade on a test). i legit have NO PAGES SET UP YET and that is my bad bc i am the WORST EVER but i am going to be working on that!!! right now!!! so until then i’ll give u guys some cliff notes on yeol. AND feel free to hit me up in my messages to plot or like this post and i’ll come to you bc I AM READY AND WILLING RN???? love me gdi dont make me beg

yeol has been born and raised in incheon his entire life :’))) he legit knows nothing of the world outside of korea and tbh? he is pretty content with that like there are not complaints coming out of him. he’s Set. not really but listen he’s gotta learn

he is 23 and in his THIRD YEAR NOW

HIS POWER IS MOLECUKINESIS, meaning he can manipulate molecules which,,, make up basically everything in the world so i mean i guess that’s pretty nifty?

he really only has three applications to it currently which is his molecular combustion (yes he can just blow shit up sometimes but he actually aint v good with his aim so u know... use this one w caution), molecular acceleration (he can set shit on fire or melt them tbh it just depends) and then his SPECIALTY his molecular deceleration (he can slow down time to a point where it legit looks like everything is frozen)

he’s got daddy issues out the fucking ass

don’t ask him abt them bc he will either get really annoyed or really emo so fast ig it depends on the day of the week

but that’s ok because he’s actually a pretty nice guy? like, if you’re nice to him i mean, he will be super chill and awesome around you but if you’re ever a jerk to him he will hold it over your head forever and he will be ruthless and not spare you the time of day bc “you’re not worth it” or if he does spare you the time it's just to be an asshole

he is,,, kind of a ,, playboy????? what is commitment :’)) he dont kno

but he just has a habit of being v friendly to those around him who he likes even if he’s done them dirty before so like yeah,, ok,, he never text u back that one night but he still wants to hang out some time bc he liked hanging out w you why you gonna deny him that?? ://///

tbh the only things yeol is real concerned with at the moment are the games

gumi is like a sanctuary for yeol?? he feels more at home at the uni with his alpha brothers than he does anywhere else and would happily stay forever if he could but he’s pretty positive they’d get sick of his ass after awhile

if he’s not actively doing something or keeping himself distracted then he’s prob sleeping and he can legit fall asleep anyway don’t play w him

an accurate pic describing yeol:

and ALSO THIS ONE LSAKFDJ

honestly listen that’s all i got for you guys right now i really gotta work on these pages so just??? love this?? love me??? love yeol??? he is a resident playboy w a charming personality who likes to have a good time and gets rly annoyed when people don’t allow him to do that so like he could have,,, a lot of connections i am so open to anything GIVE ME ALL THESE CONNECTIONS

[yuukei-yikes]

You make me want to rewatch the anime...wonder if i can force my husband to watch it with me(he showed me it but it was like...highschool its been sooo long)

Since everyone has autism/hj? Do u have any headcanons for special interests?

I FUCKING LOVE THIS ASK also husband?? HUH?? KAGEFANS ARE MARRIED ALREADY??? huh...well...kagepro IS 12 years old HUH...HAHAHA *holds head* (happy late kageversary, btw)

everyone is autistic. yeah.

ayano's is 1000% all the superhero shit. comicbooks. i like to think of her as a huge spiderman fan. i think she'd love the guy. BUT YEAH comicbooks, superhero franchises in general lol

kido's is music! i imagine them as the kind of person who basically studies a whole album when it comes out LMAO i also think theyre the kind to be embarrassed abt talking a lot so theyre probably online a lot and is instead active in there. they rotate hyperfixating on different bands but music in general <3 also i think they hyperfixate on cooking sometimes and they will just cook and cook and cook one thing after another. it used to be a problem when they only lived with 3 other ppl but now there's like 10 more and also haruka so <3 no more wasted food!!!!

fuckgn. seto. animals. ANIMALS. ANIMALS. ANIMALS. i love ppl with animal special interests bc its literally the fucking BEST thing to talk about ever. and mary is plants. theyre both into each other's things too so their talks are so awesomely autistic i think seto and mary just talk for hours and hours and are always asking each other questions and if seto had a long day marys just like tell me abt why birds are fun colors like blue but not other animals :) and seto's like :DDDDD

momo and kano..... hmmm.. everyone else's seems so obvious. but them... like i see momo getting hyperfixated with a ton of different shit always rotating from lets players to toy collecting to makeup to lost media and etc etc but i cant think of like the One thing. kinda same with kano i feel like his thing is that he doesnt know who he is or what he wants so he wouldnt even Have his one thing. i think he'd be super into makeup tho. bc thats awesome but not only cutesy makeup but like special effects insane kinda thing. hes like whoa ppl change so much without any powers......... lol special effects makeup artist kano real

takane. lol. god theyre all so fucking obvious. coding. and i love takane but programmer ppl are SOOOOOO ANNOYING god this bitch would be insufferable. but the autism makes it awesome so its ok theyre not annoying <3 obviously videogames too. UGH harutaka indie game developers is so real to me. also this one is more my hc but erm technician takane is real he is real to me <3 the dan out of wifi bc this bitch took apart the router AGAIN just bc they like looking at the insides. the dan is complaining until the wifi is back AND its faster bc takanes improving and hacking shit. she helps shintaro build his epic pc

shintaro ohhh mygod have u ever met a more autistic bitch than this. he is everything. music!!!! like kido!!!!!!!!! i think kido and shintaro are an underrated duo. in the novels they hang out so much. wait im getting off topic ERM pianist shintaro is real to me idc. also super into collectibles of anime figures lol. also videogames!!! and lost media. i think he'd be one of those people super excited that a secret burgerking commercial never translated from english was found (momo too, they bond over it)

hibiya with the doll making shit. doll costumizing. also psychology post-shitshow bc hes 12 and hes like whoa. this wasnt normal *studies abt how this will affect him and his friends* i talked abt this in a hibiya ask i got lol but yeah also his whole thing abt making dolls. ofc it comes from something creepy but i still think its a cute thing he knows how to do i think he'd love using his new smartphone to find out abt doll costumizing communities and he sews mini mekakushi dan for everyone <3

i bestow to haruka the autistic honor of dinosaurs. FUCK YEAHHHHHHHHHHH also art/drawing ofc. and cartoons/animation. ppl who like to draw like cartoons okay. he'd be into that. idk if into animating himself i rather see haruka as a painting kinda girl. AND OFC VIDEOGAMES. srry to harutaka again but harutakas autism coexists so harmoniously ...domestic harutaka... these bitches have NO real schedules and are staring at their computers drawing/coding for days. it stinks in there. they make an autistic game together born from their autistic and disabled love. heart<3

i cant think anything for hiyori so hiyori experts feel free to add. maybe idols n stuff!! back to music heh