#some of you are just straight up being biphobic and then getting annoyed when people criticise you

[trans-buckleyy]

my fav thing about fandoms (/j) is when people act like an issue is specific to one group (an individual fandom, one ship in particular, whatever grouping they're choosing to talk about), I can guarantee you there are people being dumb on all "sides"

[dreamwreaver]

I feel like if there's any any group of fans that are eagerly anticipating the appearance of Leviathan, it has to be the Charlastor shippers.

I mean, he's the proof that Charlie is bisexual and interested in men (despite what any "Charlie is a lesbian" anti would stupidly believe) and the fact he's her ex would make us Charlastor fans wonder how Alastor would react to him suddenly showing up to the hotel.

Since he basically looks like a green Alastor and Lucifer fusion, Alastor would probably hate him on the spot due to his distaste for anyone who is too similar to him and for anyone associated with the likes of the King of Hell. Also, he probably wouldn't like Sev's "jerky Chad" personality and thinks he's a spoiled, pompous rich boy. Or he would act aloof and indifferent to him just to spite the guy, who knows.

Though, I definitely think Alastor would find him annoying and I'll take any crumbs that involve the deer man getting jealous annoyed over his business partner's ex.

Full honesty nonny? I thought you meant Leviathan as in the leader of envy that were likely going to see in the next Helluva Boss episode. I realize autocorrect likely messed you on Seviathan, that's an oops on Viv for making two figures have essentially the same name tho.

As for the Von Eldritch siblings, because I doubt we'd see one without the other, I think the focus would likely be more on Charlie with Alastor acting as a background presence. Given that season 2 "plans" I use the term loosely since season 1 did not deliver, on ramping up how explicit the chaggie canon is the plot would most likely focus on Charlie trying to explain to Sev she's got a gf now while he either dumbly misunderstands or pulls an extremely biphobic "you just miss good dick" sort of comment. Helsa will meanwhile be catty and Charlie's struggle would be juggling both of them at the same time. Alastor might likely be jealous of yet another distraction getting in the way of his plans but the real jealous thing is going to be vaggie. And given how she reacted to Emily just holding Charlie's hands that's going to be... ~fun~.

Also lbr the episode will somehow end with the moral of "guys are the worst, good thing I have a gf that only lied to me about who she was for three years of our relationship".

One thing I think people misunderstand about a lot of charlastor shippers is, I'm not inherently opposed to canon chaggie. I just don't want it touted as the "ultimate wlw rep" when half the casual viewers had no fucking clue they were together until episode 5. If Viv in season 2 wants to make them horny af? Fine, it's her story, I'd rather chaggie be cringe than boring any day of the week. But if season 2 is anything like its predecessor it's not going to be crumbs we're feasting on my friend. I do hope Sev's appearance does reinforce Charlie being bisexual in some small way though. If it could be treated with the same dignity in backstory (ha, dignity, but I'm lacking for a better word) as moxxie's got in helluva; no less bi just because he ended up in a straight passing relationship, then I'll be happy.

[thrilling-oneway]

You are so right with m/f stuff! I’m not familiar with a lot of VBS shipping discourse, but it’s annoying to see how people can’t write an analysis on how important Tsukasa is to Rui without others dog piling them and saying they’re delusional and ignoring canon for their yaoi “with no content”. (At least on twitter, tumblr is much better with this) And as someone whose also bisexual, it’s so annoying seeing people use bisexuality as a gotcha to ship m/f and act as if its progressive and that it gives them the okay to hate on f/f and m/m pairings.

YES YES EXACTLY. God I hate when people keep saying that ruikasa has no content and their dynamic is underdeveloped whenever anyone talks about them. Like as biased as I am because I like the ship, they do have a very developed dynamic regardless of if you like the ship or not. Literally there's three events about it (potato and pandemonium + it was a pretty big background element in curtain call), one of which is the third event in the game. like if you don't like ritk that's perfectly fine, but when people are dogpilling ritk shippers for talking about their dynamic/pandemonium chapter 8/wtv and saying they're reaching, especially if the person doing this is an account dedicated to another rui ship/are a rui fan, it's a bad look because you're literally ignoring a very significant part of his arc. Ignoring massively important aspects of a character you claim to like just because of a ship is low. This fandom is way too set on everything being about shipping like bruh no one is telling you that you had to view pandemonium as romantic you can view it as platonic perfectly fine and not need to erase parts of rui's character to justify your rui/female character ship.

it's an especially weird situation with VBS as well. as much as I hold the earlier EN fandom to a higher standard there was a lot of discourse around VBS and the fact that they're implied gay. like it used to be a situation where if you admitted you shipped m/f vbs you would get jumped. as a comeback people would accuse biphobia but i never saw huge amounts of people being actually biphobic. saying "an and kohane are quite heavily implied to be lesbians (and it makes some people uncomfortable to see them shipped with men)" is a true statement but people didn't need to attack others over it. not liking a bi headcanon isn't biphobic unless you're actually being biphobic about it yknow? luckily it calmed down after a while but now you get jumped for not shipping m/f which leads us straight back to the statement about an and kohane. gbr the situation with vbs shipping nowadays is much worse than the situation when i first joined, obviously partially bc of the massive increase in fandom size but mainly because people are spewing actual homophobic rhetoric over akty ankh (someone literally tried to claim heterophobia was real bc of people not liking m/f vbs a couple months ago. actually this has happened multiple times).

AND YES GOD THIS FANDOM'S APPROACH TO BI HEADCANONS IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING. Like people only use it as a way to make m/f ships more queer and try to 1 up people with it because oh yes male/female couple are not the norm at all and they're so cool and different and if you add a bi/pan hc on top of that it makes you more progressive (/s). HCing a character as bi does not give you cool points and the fact that so many people only do it for m/f ships pisses me off to no end because people treat it like Straight 2 when bi people can be in m/m and f/f relationships. People can hc whatever they want ofc but it's so obvious sometimes that people are only using bi hcs as a way to quickly round off their hcs for every character so they can multiship or justify their m/f ships as queer and at that point I'd rather they just hc'd them as straight because I don't like seeing my identity used solely for the purpose of making a ship more queer because someone doesn't want their m/f to be a hetship.

[will80sbyers]

hello! i'm a gay mike truther and I'm confused bc lately I've been seeing ppl accuse us of biphobia when most of my moots including myself, are bisexual!! could you please explain the issue to me and your views on bisexual mike? thank you and have a nice day lovely! 🩷

I personally never said all gay Mike truthers are biphobic, most gay Mike truthers are lovely people and I follow many of them and have conversations with them without any problems but sometimes someone posts some take on the tag that is born from biphobic ideas or talk about people that believe in bi mike like they are stupid if they think that or they are "heteronormative" for thinking Mike could have liked El initially and that is not okay to me, even if some saying this stuff may be bisexual themselves that doesn't make those arguments not biphobic so I speak up when I see it because I don't think it's okay to be like that when there is literally nothing confirmed yet in the show

Gay Mike is a headcanon exactly like Bi mike, for now Mike is presented as "straight" in the show so saying you are stupid or heteronormative if you think Mike did like El is really shitty and I get annoyed when people also attack my whole identity for a stupid headcanon honestly, there is literally no need of being like that, you can make many many posts about gay Mike without being shitty to other people and lots of people I follow do exactly that

If you're sure about gay Mike because of X and Y reasons you don't need to be using biphobia to make your argument or weird "moral" takes on why mike being bi would be bad bisexual representation just because you yourself don't see him in that way

For my views on bi Mike I made a power point if you're interested, and I have many posts in my fixed post in the blog 🩷

Anyway in general all the nice respectful people are always welcome in my blog and when I make posts calling out the biphobia I'm talking about specific posts and people even if I don't want to post the usernames to not give them harassment because I don't think that's ok, I hope they are not aware of what they are saying maybe and can learn a different perspective with time and don't mean to be biphobic

Hope you have a great day!!

[aconstantstateofbladerunner]

I did actually get a hint of the racism angle from some of the Dekugate posters. The ones discussing Inko being a "traditional Japanese beauty" and how "conservative" Japan is especially gives me vibes of "Western anime fans who dismiss Japan as a whole as conservative and without any liberal politics or social movements (ex feminism or anti-imperialism), and who's only knowledge of queer culture is Western queer culture + yaoi produced for straight women."

Basically, I'm saying your Dekugate fic really is amazing because it so effectively captures both the overt horror of fandoms centered around these conspiracy theories, as well as the subtle way these homophobic (biphobic specifically in this case), misogynistic, and racist biases appear even in supposedly "woke" spaces.

Misogyny and gay fetishization justified with progressive language are a huge feature of real life celebrity conspiracy counterparts. The most common refrain is the way the actual girlfriends of the center ship are treated. They are not merely women dating men, they are gold-digging influencer wannabes hired by a marketing team to push a narrative that the guys are straight. And because they are willing to participate in ‘closeting,’ it means they are evil, homophobic pieces of shit and anything said about them is fair game. Their weight, their sense of fashion, their bone structure, whether or not they put the man first, how often are they scene without the man present, the way they touch the man, did they ever have sex with someone in exchange for something, what they eat, the way they dance, the way they walk their dog. In the real world, it’s not misogyny to criticize a women for questionable behavior, but you’re supposed to stick with the behavior itself. In conspiracy fandoms, saying that a woman has ‘evil eyes’ is just an extension of the totally reasonable criticism that she didn’t like her boyfriend’s instagram post.

Then there’s the way queerness is used as a justification of misogyny against other, non conspiracy fans. Anyone who doesn’t believe in the conspiracy must be straight, homophobic, stupid teenaged girls without any real life experience. It’s so gross that they think a conventionally attractive person is attractive, unlike the noble pursuits of editing their faces onto gay porn and speculating about what position they have sex in. The reasons they like or connect with the celebrity are totally shallow and insincere. How can they relate to these totally exclusively queer and not all generic lyrics about finding hope through hard times? Oh what’s that? You’re a queer person who doesn’t believe in the conspiracy? You’re not a fan of the celebrity? You must not actually be queer then.

And like i said in the other post, I’m not the most qualified person to talk about racism, but i have seen some shit. A common refrain in some corners is saying that if marketing is going to set the dude up with a fake girlfriend, the least they could do is give him a woman of color who might steer him away from his less-than-progressive image. (I’ve only found one fandom where the focus of the conspiracy is around a non-white celebrity, and even then there is a lot of discourse within about his ethnicity.) Correct me if I’m out of line, but the way they talk about it really sounds like they want a token so their dude looks more progressive in the eyes of people outside their bubble. Especially since that often, when the dude does actually date someone of a different ethnicity, the fandom bends over backwards to ‘prove’ the woman is actually white, ‘white-passing,’ or otherwise not actually ‘enough’ of their ethnicity so they can justify the shitstorm all over again. It’s the same bullshit as when someone wants to make some old school misogynistic joke about women being irrational and annoying, but throw ‘white’ in the front so it can play in pseudo-progressive spaces. And that’s when they don’t just drop the pretenses and start throwing around dog whistles and slurs.

TL;dr: shitty people will often try to come up with moral justification for their shitty beliefs and behaviors, and progressive language is just one of the tools in the toolkit.

[janersm]

Every hashtag that an ableist, aphobic, biphobic TERF has made about me (so far) because she didn’t like that I said relationships involving bisexual people are inherently queer & told her not to call me bihet.

[Alt text for nine screenshots posted above:

#get a life you fucking loser #you're harassing me in my inbox like an insecure pathetic baby and self-victimizing yourself #and lying #who actually experiences oppression and vitriol is homosexuals #wah being told im privileged is oppression and hate #you're calling all gays hateful and evil saying they oppress you for being in het relationships Imao #you think sexuality is based on gender and not biological sex bc ur homophobic #once again by this logic straight men are gay if they date bi women and lesbians are het if they date bi women #stfu #stop erasing ppl bc you wanna be oppressed so bad #white woman cringe #gays have it easier because when they get hate crimed at least they know their entire sexual orientation #we're so lucky #for being validated before getting killed and beaten <3 #you can tell which bis have been w women be at least some of them will acknowledge the privilege they have when with men but still very few #and ive seen other bis dogpile them and accuse them of having internalized biphobia for saying they have privilege when dating and marrying #men #the white ppl of sexuality tbh

#can u imagine if you told a straight man he is feminine and in a feminine relationship or some shit for dating a woman #thats how crazy you sound #closest kinda of analogy i can think of at 4am #jfc #stop oppressing me for having a bf my relationship is gay so treat me like a gay person if you don't it's discrimination and erasure #but also according to her #heterosexual relationships are gay #braindead comment #i face the most homophobia bc i have a bf it's true #sorry gayz #???? #liberal brainrot #just switch words around and call it oppression #why are liberals all so narcisstic and toxic #they're so obsessed with telling minorities they are privileged and finding a way to say they aren't privileged be they think oppression is #fun and being privileged is boring #white as hell but acting like they're the biggest anti racists or anti oppression while they perpetuate it and deny their privileges and #intersections of their privileges #she's gonna say she's authority on racism now bc i can't say trans ideology and community is racist and white #w their own white supremacists

#and according to her the nasty gays (dirty perveted genital fetishists) and the monosexuals (straights) are harming the most oppressed and #neglected 'minorities' asexuals and bisexuals #imagine equating bisexual struggles to asexuals Imaooo #yikes #a self drag #don't erase yourself then complain :)) #stop saying hetero relationships are gay :)) #everytime a bi person says they're gay you're committing homophobia and erasure of two groups of people :)) #one of whom who faces real oppression for their sexuality #hint it's not the woman w the bf #she thinks she's authority on lesphobia/ homophobia then calls all gays biphobic privileged oppressors #even poc understand we have different struggles and privileges #it's so funny #how pathetic they are #so offended by having privilege #if you're gonna call yourself gay and your straight relationship gay #complaining about bihet is so hypocrital #i didn't even just say she's het Imao #i was gonna write up a post about this but it feels like a good place to discuss this #bi women just keep slapping us in the face acting like this and saying shit like this

#homegirl also said i ruined her sleep and made her take more meds #i didn't force you to stalk n harass me #i had this post so long i had to cut down so much of what i said #god she's annoying af #such a manipulative sad pathetic person obsessed with being a liberal victim #while she's literally mutals with TYGRESS #why can't they ever talk about how homophobic and misogynistic they are #i feel like for one thing #truly if bis stopped acting like women are just for fucking or not real partners / people for not being men then things would be different #i have a butch lesbian friend in kentucky #it's more unsafe to be a poc #anyway #bisexuals stop gasligting gay people challenge #she said she was going to bed and now she's watching her phone and refreshing my blog every second #YOU'RE CREEPY #looks like white men are rubbing off on you too much #your disability doesn't make you homophobic or a creepy stalker #that's 100% you #you're so creepy tbh #i dont think you know how blocking works #you literally brought it up as an abusive tactic to control a minority Imao when it isn't relevant

#to deflect from accountability and silence them #white behaviour #next you'll say being gay is an excuse to be racist #stfu #you're so obsessed with what ithink #it's really funny #you think lesbians can have dicks or like dick #you're pro conversion therapy #stay away from women but you probably will anyway thankfully #the fact you care so much what i think while speaking over me #if i acted like you a decade from now #at your age #yikesss #you're straight up stalking me and harassing me at this point Imao #<3 #you wanna play the liberal oppression card when you're a homophobic moron #i'm also a brown woman #so stfu #YOU STILL HAVE ME BLOCKED AND YOU'RE ENGAGING #HOW PATHETIC ARE YOU? #liberal cringe #gaslighting queen <3 #no patience #ur 95 percent and higher in het relationships exclusively #shut the fuck up #you don't know what vitrol or hate or oppression is #thats why you talk like this and act like #being hatecrimed makes you privileged <3 #i mean the gays practically do by denying my relationship isn't gay #so funny….they use the world queer

#by funny i mean sick #A SLUR AIMED AT HOMOSEXUALS FOR BEING GAY #WHO DIED OFTEN AFTER HEARING THAT WORD OR GETTING BEATEN TO NEAR DEATH #haha my relationship is queer <3 ur not even GAY ur bi and never date women or seriously #then you complain erasure #racist/homophobic/ misogynistic content my bi heart <3 #says people some get treated worse but then denies privilege #bc funny who is it they argue who always have privilege? FEMALES AND HOMOSEXUALS #NOT BISEXUALS AND MALES #B & T community are evil #males and osa are the most oppressed and females/ homosexuals are the most privileged <3 #what is gay privilege #you can't name one #bc it doesn't exist #if you deemed content biphobic you'd lose ur shit and never watch it tho #but heterophobic content doesn't exist :)) #and i'm every single terf when i'm not even a radfem #i think this drama is really funny tbh #you might as well be bc ur all cliche and homophobic #cry #if you cared about being productive you wouldn't be here

#it's so funny how your media consumption is literally all about misogynistic/ homophobic/racist white men #it's funny how cliche you are #you're so mad that i have a brain and you don't #keep crying <3 #talking about homophobic people and calling them out is doing something also tbh #you're such a hypocrite #you think you're fighting heterophobia #but you're just homophobic #spreading bs #you're really narcissistic and manipulative <3 #i'm glad you don't have a gf #you're homophobic and are obsessed with victimizing yourself #there is no such thing as discrimination for opposite sex attraction #it's a privilege #how aren't het women more offended that bi women act like they're suffering so much bc of het woman while y'all live the same lifestyles #for the rest of your lives... #oh right it's that homophobic pact. #they seem to have #remember when a bisexual woman married to a man said she was JEALOUS of gay men at pride #your pride is there everyday every second of your life and rewarded and centred #privileged #ifcc

#you're erasing gay people and being a hypocrite #and you're erasing straight people #so funny you're so pissed off youre called out on how stupid you are you're stalking my blog #if you were so confident you wouldn't take me seriously #you're in a privileged relationship #you have osa privilege #your relationship is straight even if you aren't #you're gonna call gays and straights bis #then don't whine when you feel erased #calling ur relationship het isn't even erasure #biphobia isn't real #you just think heterophobia is real and that gays oppress you #run to your boyfriend and cry how some actual gay person thinks you aren't oppressed #this is the straightest bio i've ever read #you can tell which bis have been w women bc at least some of them will acknowledge the privilege they have when with men but still very few #and ive seen other bis dogpile them and accuse them of having internalized biphobia for saying they have privilege when dating and marrying #men #the white ppl of sexuality tbh #can u imagine if you told a straight man he is feminine and in a feminine relationship or some shit for dating a woman

#thats how crazy you sound #closest kinda of analogy i can think of at 4am #jfc #stop oppressing me for having a bf my relationship is gay so treat me like a gay person if you don't it's discrimination and erasure #why are bihets like this... #holy shit #my straight relationship is gay/queer and if you don't agree you're heterophobic]

She has her friends monitoring my blog and encourages people in posts to bother me, but accuses me of stalking and harassing her when I haven’t said a damn thing to her in weeks. The only reason I even go to her blog is to make sure I have blocked every single person who she’s talking shit about me with & encouraging to come after me.

Also, who even is tygress? And how does she know who I’m mutuals with? My following list is private.

[shinydixon]

It annoys me how some h*llcheers, when accused of homophobia, say they can't be homophobic because they're gay/bi. You very much can be, internalized as well as lateral aggression. Gay people can be biphobic, same gender attracted women can be homophobic towards sga men, and vice versa.

It sucks to be a guy and engaging in an m/m ship because m/m shippers are accused of all being straight women who fetishise gay men (which is something h*llcheers have said about steddies). Yes, some are and it sucks, but a lot, if not most, are queer men and women. Also, in my experience most guys I've come across in m/m shipping spaces have been gay/bi transmascs (like me) and since "fetishistic straight women" we're often called by transphobic gays, I can't trust people who say that.

Not to mention how much it hurts when people say "why don't you just ship canon m/m couples instead?" Because there isn't a lot of shows, that aren't "gay shows" (pose, heartstopper, young royals), that have main characters who are queer men, and that's not their entire personality, much less for trans men or bi/pan men.

I'm glad will is canonically gay, but with the way it's presented in the show I'm sure that some straight viewers don't get it yet, and why can't we have more than him and robin? And let's be real, will is a much "safer" character to "make" queer than steve or eddie; character's that I'm sure more straight men are projecting themselves on than there are who project themselves on will. Imagine if a character that was "meant for" straight people, came out as gay or bi? It's not gonna happen, especially if that character is a man, because straight men's sexuality and masculinity are so intertwined and so, so fragile. So please, let us have fun. Let us make up headcanons for these characters that we love, because that's all we're ever gonna have.

Even though both parties in h*llcheer are dead and the possibility of them being canon is non existant, it's still less non existant than the possibility of steddie becoming canon, and would be met with zero hostility from the general audience, compared to steddie. We know why this is, and we also know why they can so easily demonize and make out all steddie shippers as villains, while burying any evidence of foul play on their own side.

This was long, sorry, but I needed to rant and I don't feel like being attracting #them to my blog.

Don't ever say sorry, I'm here for everybody who have the need to vent or rant🥹

Sorry but it's so stupid saying "I'm bi so I can't be homophobic" for the reasons you already listed.

Anyway you shouldn't listen to those kind of hellcheers, some of them don't even respect Grace, we can't expect to be treated with kindness when they see steddie as something that gets in between their ship.

Block them, filter their tag and even if you're tempted, don't go looking for their post to check what they're saying about steddies because it can be hurtful and can ruin your fun.

Instead, look for what makes you happy! HC, art, fanfiction, incorrect quotes (these are my favorite btw) etc.

I realize that in my blog we talk a lot about these toxic people and this is the reason why I proceed to reblog a lot of steddie/steve/eddie/joe/jamie/Joe K./other media content; like this I can also share something that we enjoy with people that check my blog to see what I answer, and might be upset by some of the asks.

[lollich0p]

"Soft confirmed lesbian" it was a deleted tweet from one writer that no other writers corroborated, it's not any sort of confirmation at all, and chances are valve probably made him delete the tweet because it was misinfo.

it's also uncomfortable that you refer to it as "straight shipping" when (if I'm telling right from the current influx of Sc*utP*uling posts in the tags rn) the person in question headcanons both P*uling and Sc*ut as bisexual, and while I can somewhat agree with the concern of it attracting the wrong people, there were better and less biphobic ways to express that.

(Words censored so they don't show up as keywords in searches, because I figure you might not want that given how some people act about this stuff, slurs and dudebros and stuff)

My public response ig. Firstly I did not mean this to be biphobic I didn't know who i was talking about headcanoned them as bisexual. if we are even talking about the same person. (one of the downsides of being vague lol)

In defense of me saying "Soft confirmed lesbian" sorry for feeding off the scraps that get thrown to me. I didn't know he deleted the tweet either. Also we don't really have any proof one way or the other valve being the ones who made him delete it, i remember him getting a bit of harassment from it back in the day so it could also simply been because of that. (sorry ik thats a big nitpick but like there are other reasons lol) Also saying that it has no weight because none of the other writers said anything about it doesn't really make the tweet more or less proof. Once again I picked my wording carefully, i referred to it as a soft confirmation exactly because he was the only writer to say it. And her being a lesbian doesn't show up solidly in any cannon content. This is like a dumbledore is gay situation but in my opinion less shitty.

And I referred to it as "straight shipping" as that was what the original discourse was called. As sc*ut/p*uling was a very popular straight ship in the tf2 fandom when i first joined, expiration date making it even bigger than it already was. So jay saying he wrote miss p as a lesbian was kind of a big deal and a lot of lesbian fans took it very seriously (myself included for a while). So of course there was a lot of arguing and drama over it. Which kinda tainted the whole ship for me. And seeing the discourse get revived live on my dash with only input from sc*ut/p*uling shippers who were regurgitating the same arguements I and i'm sure other have heard before without any voices from people who HC miss p as a lesbian was annoying so I complained.

TLDR i don't really care one way or another about sc*ut/p*uling it's just a ship and it isn't hurting anyone. I personally just think its kinda mid and the discourse surrounding it is annoying.

Once again I am sorry I didn't mean for my post to come across that way, I was simply frustrated to see a pretty watered down version of the same discourse that been happening on here for years. So i decided to complain about it on my own personal blog with what i hoped to be as little context as possible to have it be brought back to bother the op or myself.

[vtori73]

It always so... ugh I don't know just ugh.

Just, the LGBTQIA community REALLY needs to work on not being Biphobic for like... 5 seconds at the very least. Just... it's soooo normalized, even bi people who have internalized biphobia partake because they like licking boots of biphobics, I guess.

It's just interesting too to realize how MANY of these assholes don't actually know any actual bi people or our actual struggles and just make shit up to be mad at bi people for. Like, for example these non-bi people were going on & on about how this bi person explaining their experiences sounded like x biracial person/that bi people "stole" biracial peoples fav talking point (specifically white biracial people), etc and just... 1st of all... y'all REALLY don't know anything about Bi-ness, bi people etc because THIS ISNT A NEW TALKING POINT, we've have BEEN talking about this sort of phenomena (we don't feel like we belong in either straight or gay communities) for a VERY VERY LONG TIME. It's not our fault you don't bother having bi people around in your life &/or just educating yourself on our history, texts, & issues. 2nd you can't compare these two things many people known this and some people have learned this more recently but regardless why is it in this instance okay to bring up? Once a bi person annoys you it's okay to make comparisons that don't make sense/problematic?

Not to mention how insidious it is to do so because this makes us seem like we have privilege in anyway that has to do with our sexuality and regardless of your personal opinions on the matter WE don't. "Well what about straight bi's/bi people dating cisheteroallo people?" Well, for one thing while I will admit there probably are a FEW Bi people who get benefits from this sort of relationship it's not JUST because of the relationship but also other factors of how they go about things (& no this is not in regards to closeted bi people) this also isn't exactly a unique phenomena with bi people either (such as cis gays/lesbians who are/were trying to assimilate with allocishetero society) HOWEVER for many Bi people being with a partner that's allocishetero isn't really all that privileged when you realize specifically Bi woman (idk the stats for gay/bi men) are more likely to suffer from IPV compared to either straight or gay woman. And, well, you know how Gays/Lesbians tend to have high rates of x compared to straight people like health issues, for example? Yeah well, the rates for us tend to be even higher compared to either straight or gay people and that's just focusing on cis individuals imagine how worse it gets for trans bi people.

So, yeah, regardless of who we are in a relationship with that doesn't really change the fact that we still struggle with higher rates or health issues, homelessness, sexual assault, substance abuse problems, domestic abuse, and whatever else AND despite us being the biggest community get hardly any funding or resources compared to the LG communities. Sure, MAYBE we don't deal with as much harassment if we are out in public with our seemingly cishetero partner but again this is a much more complicated and nuanced discussion then people are willing to acknowledge considering that the abuse and problems we face tends to get erased and labeled as just homophobia or something. I actually tried to do some quick research too & didn't find much but one article from the UK talking about hate crimes and how the stats weren't all that much diff from each sexuality with 77% gay men & woman participants experiencing a hate crime & 75% bisexual people but this stat actually goes UP when you account for gender (79% for bi woman participants). It also mentions how Bi & Trans people are less likely to report incidents to the police so I can only imagine these numbers are even higher (btw it's 79% for trans participants).

One thing that would REALLY help is if LG people would just... ACKNOWLEDGE this shit, just acknowledge we actually do have struggles and are oppressed just like any other queer identity and us having to deal with our own community not helping & even just flat out hurting us only makes our problems worse. That isn't me calling y'all oppressors though because y'all aren't, BUT I will call y'all oppressor wannabes because why else would you treat us like shit for just existing?

*not entirely sure where to put this above so sticking it down here but yeah the big difference between white biracial people and bisexuality is that bisexuals don't have privilege just for being Bi. White biracial people have privilege due to proximity to whiteness & (usually) colorism something that is visible from the outside. Bisexuality, however, is not some offshoot of straightness and is not actually connected to being straight in anyway (and also sexuality is not really visible just by looking at someone) and even if it WAS we aren't afford any "privilege" because in our allocishetero society any sort of queer attraction is a deviation from what it considers the norm, if you DONT just like the "opposite sex" your not seen as normal. Straight people don't see us as straight (sometimes certain dynamics do cause this like bi woman not being taken seriously & are just "doing it for attention" but that's specifically a mix of misogyny & biphobia NOT straight privilege) and while most of us bisexuals don't give a shit what they think the problem though is that gay people see US as straight people! Because regardless of our queer attractions so long as we don't conform to what they have made being homosexuality all about we don't get to be included. We have to play along with them and join in on the Biphobic jokes and give in to their binaries in order to be included and if not we get cast aside as troublesome. Some of them think we choose or can choose to be in a "straight relationship" when we are done being homosexual but it's so funny in a sad way they end up repeating what conservatives & bigots have said to them, that their sexuality is a choice. No, the Bi person you got dumped for isnt going into a "straight passing relationship" because they were straight to begin with they just happened to start dating someone who was cis & straight & allo afterwords (which isn't farfetched considering you known... the population of cis straight allo people is kind of high). Not to mention this topic gets really tricky/messy when you realize a lot of LG people label anyone who looks straight on the outside as a bi x straight person couple/straight relationship when in reality it could easily be any number of combinations of queer individuals together especially when you take trans people into account and how this sort of rhetoric negatively effects them as well.

[mayhem24-7forever]

First off you need to deflate that giant ego inflated head of yours.

Second I am not "harassing" anyone I am calling out a serious problem in the fandom which is that a huge number of writers are ignoring the main canon couple of the show who are also gay men in order to ship themselves with those characters. It's homophobic and unacceptable and I will continue to call out everyone who does this.

If someone doesn't want to ship Vigilmaker then okay that's a little sus but not inherently homophobic...erasing Chris and Adrian's romantic relationship and their sexualities (they're literally both gay!!!! what is WRONG with you freaks???) so that horny straight bitches can ship themselves with them is straight inarguably homophobic. It's also pathetic and cringe. Reader inserts are fucking cringe! This is literally why we need to bring back bullying.

It's not about blocking or filtering tags! It's about the fact that these fics shouldn't exist in the first place! It's fucking shameful that there are so many of them and they outnumber fics about the main couple of the show! Filtering tags doesn't get rid of them problem which is that they exist and there's a lot of them.

This fandom is not for horny straight bitches! Get out! Get out of our tags get out of fandom GO AWAY!!!!! This show isn't fucking for you!!!!

To your first point: You telling me I have a big ego when you refuse to even try and argue against anyone's points is peak comedy. So if I am the kettle, you are the pot.

Secondly, as has been pointed out to you by several people you've decided to bug about this, Vigilmaker isn't canon or the "main couple" of the show and both characters have been canonically shown to be attracted to the opposite sex (which doesn't rule out that they can be bisexual or pansexual btw). So I'm a little confused as to how you think anyone is setting canon sexualities aside for anything. But in case you don't believe me here's some proof from James Gunn himself: (https://www.cbr.com/peacemaker-vigilante-shipping-james-gunn-confused/). Also here's some proof that Chris is CANONICALLY bisexual, not strictly homosexual (https://www.out.com/television/2022/2/16/how-peacemaker-became-bisexual-in-hbo-max-show-john-cena-james-gunn-dc-comics-dceu). So technically speaking, you're going against canon.

Also, I'm wondering if your feelings on this applies to other changes to canon made by fan fic authors? Do you only read things tagged with "canon compliant" and believe that making them in any sort of AU is reprehensible to canon? Because apparently it is "homophobic" for me to not ship two characters who are canonically straight or at most bisexual/pansexual but if I were to write a fic where everyone was a pirate instead of their canon jobs, that's something you're gonna allow. Just curious how we're drawing the lines of what is and isn't acceptable for fanfiction.

The thing that annoys me the most about this isn't just that you refuse to even try and defend your argument with anything except repeating the same points that have already been refuted and proved incorrect and childish insults about being "cringe" etc. What really gets me is that you are straight up assuming everyone who writes these fics must be horny straight cis women because apparently in your eyes you are either gay or straight and there's no inbetween. Newsflash: Bisexuals, Pansexuals, and other Queer identities exist.

To your complaints about self insert/reader fics being cringe or disgusting, that's your opinion. It's something you're not into in fanfiction and that's alright, we all have our preferences. Personally, I don't like to read fics with unhappy endings but you don't see me going in the ask boxes of angst writers to complain. You're apparent beef with self insert writers isn't some moral mission to stop homophobia, because there's no homophobia going on (except from your biphobic ass). I'm not going to do you the disservice of assuming your gender or sexuality as you have done for me and my friends but no matter your gender or sexuality, you don't get to be the ruler of all fanfic who determines what is and is okay.

Yeah, it would be a valid problem/concern if James Gunn were to come out and say that Chris and Adrian are now 100% homosexual and in love and that their past references to having heterosexual sex no longer apply as they've changed and are now super duper gay and people were to make them straight for fics. But that's not what's happening so I don't know where you got this stick up your ass from. Stop policing or gatekeeping fandom, no one died and made you head ceo of the Peacemaker/DC fandom so stop acting like it.

TLDR; L + you don't know how to argue + you're biphobic + you're an asshole + you're straight up wrong <3

[ilikefandoms]

Family Dinner - Robby Keene

Request - Hi, it's me again. You could write something in which the reader and Robby are in a secret relationship and Daniel notices that boy's passionate gaze and is curious to know who the mysterious young woman is who was leaving him like this, then asks him to invite her to a family dinner . It turns out that Daniel didn't even imagine that this girl was the golden student of Cobra Kai, almost as relentless as Tory and Samantha's number one rival. Throughout dinner, the reader does her best not to provoke a scene, even with Sam's indiscreet insinuations about her being a bad person and to make matters worse, a conversation about sexual orientation arises in a very prejudiced way from Louie and she is extremely offended after a prejudiced comment about bisexuality (she is bisexual, Robby knows and accepts this), Daniel ends up being faster and goes after her, the two talk very cute (almost father and daughter) and the two end up giving each other very well . Anyway, after all that mixture of emotions that was the night, Robby takes the reader home which leads to a lot of affection and kisses on her part (deep down, under that badass exterior she is just a big monster of affection ❤). Sorry if it took too long hahaha.

Pronouns used - She/Her

A/N -  Disclaimer: I do not agree with anything that Louie says in this, it is purely for the storyline. I also kinda made Sam look like a bad guy...sorry Sam.

Warnings - Louie being a biphobic asshole, language

Word Count - 1593

You and Robby had a somewhat 'secret relationship'. You had both decided not to tell anyone, considering the rivalry between your respective dojos. Anyway, you were enjoying spending time with Robby alone.

Daniel had begun to get suspicious though. He had noticed that Robby had been acting different than usual, smiling at his phone, and getting home later. Daniel had made the fair assumption that Robby was in fact, seeing someone.

He had not-so subtilty brought up the question in conversation, taking Robby aback. Robby had admitted it though, and Mr Larusso had asked to meet this ‘Mystery Girl’, and asked Robby to invite you to family dinner.

So, here you were standing outside the Larusso’s house, having just texted Robby that you were here. You didn’t want Sam answering the door. 

Robby opened the door, “Hey babe, why didn’t you knock?”

“I didn’t want Sam or someone opening it to see me,” you shrugged, “I’m just nervous I guess, what with mine and Sam’s rivalry, with Cobra Kai. Everything,”

Robby wrapped his arms around you, “It’s gonna be ok, alright. If it ends up being too awkward or whatever, we can leave,” he reassured.

“Thank you,” 

He kissed your cheek, “Anytime. Ready to go in?” you nodded. Robby placed his hand in yours, and you walked in.

The Larusso’s house was beautiful, it had off-white walls, a mixture of hardwood and patterned flooring, and large windows. It was probably one of the nicest houses you’d ever been in.

“Hey Robby,” Amanda Larusso approached you, “This must be your girlfriend. I’m Amanda,”

“Y/N,” you said.

“it’s so great to meet you, Robby’s told us so much about you!” She said - even if this wasn’t true.

“No he hasn’t,” you said, with a weak chuckle.

“Okay, well... that’s true, but I hope to get to know you more today. Okay, we are eating outside today as it is a lovely night. Everyone else is already out there, make yourselves at home, and dinner will be ready in a few minutes,” she said, smiling.

You both thanked her, before heading outside to where everyone was talking. “Hey everyone,” Robby made your presence known.

“Hey Robby!” Daniel greeted, before laying his eyes on you, when his smile faded. It was no secret that you were the Golden Student of Cobra Kai, you had even been known to take Miguel and Tory in fights, and of course...Sam.

“What is she doing here?” Sam exclaimed, gesturing towards you.

Your grip on Robby’s hand tightened. You had expected this, so you decided to stand your ground, “I was invited,” you asserted.

“Who would invite you here?” Sam asked with narrowed eyes.

“Sam,” Robby said, in an attempt to calm her down. 

It was at this point that her eye’s travelled down to where yours and Robby’s hands were enlaced. “Don’t tell me you’re actually dating this bitch,”

“Sam!” Daniel scolded, and just before an argument could come out, Mrs Larusso arrived, holding trays of food.

“Am I interrupting something?” She asked, her eyebrows raised.

“No, mom. We’re fine,” Sam said, partially through gritted teeth.

**********

There had been evident silence since dinner had started, it was starting to get annoying, how Sam was giving you death glares from across the table. Anthony was doing the same, although he was just probably copying what Sam was doing.

Amanda then decided to break the silence, asking you a question “So, Y/N how did you and Robby meet?”

“We met at the skate park. Robby was tried to do a new trick, but it went wrong and his board ended up flying in my direction, he apologised, we started talking, and...here we are,” you replied, giving her a smile.

“Oh that’s sweet, and from what little Robby has said, you do karate?” she questioned.

“Yeah, I do,” you said, purposefully not saying your dojo’s name - even if Sam and Mr Larusso knew, you wanted to keep the dojo rivalry to a minimum.

“She’s top of her class as well,” Robby added, “She can easily beat me in a fight,” 

“Only because you fight dirty,” Sam uttered underneath her breath.

You ignored her, “I wouldn’t say easily,” you protested, “But, yeah I can totally kick your ass,” you said, letting out a small laugh. Sam rolled her eyes

“Wow, that’s really impressive. What dojo do you go to,” Mrs Larusso asked.

“Oh, um, Cobra Kai,” you said, somewhat trailing off towards the end.

“Oh. Okay, is this why this dinner is being so awkward?” she said, and no-one answered, “Obviously it is,” she mumbled.

“Aren’t they the dojo that dislocated Robby’s shoulder?” Louie asked.

“Technically that was just Hawk,” Robby defended.

“Still doesn’t excuse their shitty teaching methods,” Sam said quietly.

Your hand balled into a fist. Her snarky comments were starting to fuel your anger. Robby placed his hand over yours, gently rubbing his thumb over your knuckles - an action that he knew calmed you, and gave you a reassuring smile.

“Y/N, are you new to town? I can’t recall seeing you anywhere,” Amanda questioned, seemingly ignoring her daughters comments.

“Yeah, I only moved here 6 months ago. My mom got a new job,” you explained.

“Oh, what does you mom do?"

“She’s a real estate agent,” you replied.

“Oh, that’s cool,”

**********

Conversation slowly picked up from there, although that didn’t stop Sam from making remarks. It was like she was trying to get people to think you were a bad person, saying stuff like ‘Dad, I’m glad that you taught me and Robby the right way of karate’.

It was honestly taking a toll on you, you had to work hard to make a good impression, and not act out and make a scene.

“Mom, did I tell you that Moon has a girlfriend now?” Sam asked her mother.

“Oh, that’s lovely,” 

“Yeah, it’s this Piper. She’s nice,” she explained.

“Moon is the girl that was dating that Hawk guy?” Louie butted in.

“Yeah,”

“Was she just gay all along then?”

“No, she’s just bisexual,” Sam said, furrowing her eyebrows at Louie’s question.

“Sam, come on. Bisexuality isn’t real,” you fists balled as Louie continued, “People are either gay or straight, you can’t like both, that’s just... unnatural,”

“Fuck this!” You yelled. You rose from your seat, and stormed out of the back yard.

“Louie, what the fuck?” Sam, and Amanda said in unison. Robby sat there glaring at Louie for a few seconds, before standing up to go after you. Daniel put a hand on his shoulder, and muttered an “I’ll go,” and went after you. Meanwhile, Amanda was kicking Louie out of the house, using language she would never use in front of her kids in any other sort of situation.

Daniel ran after you. “Y/N! Wait,” 

“What do you want?” you said, wiping tears that had escaped. 

“Look, I’m sorry for what Louie said. If it’s any consolation, Amanda is shouting at him, and kicking him out,” he stated.

“You can’t control what he said. It’s not your fault,” 

“I know, but I’m still sorry, and I’m also sorry for what Sam has been saying. I know you two have your rivalry...thing, but it shouldn’t have come up,”

“Yeah, thanks,” you nodded.

“You did well for handling it as well as you did, had that of been me, I would’ve thrown hands,” he said, impressed.

“Oh, trust me I wanted to. It just doesn’t give off a good impression if you beat the shit out of the people your boyfriend’s living with,” you chuckled.

“Yeah, well I guess not,” he smiled.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” you asked, genuinely confused.

“What do you mean?”

“Well like, I’m a part of Cobra Kai. I’ve been in fights with your daughter, I’m not what people call the best ‘influence’ on people. Need I say more?” you said

“I see your point, but Robby trusts you. I’ve seen him improve since you two have been together, he seems happier, and if he trusts you, then I do too,” he explained.

“Thank you Mr Larusso,” you said, smiling at him.

“No problem kid,” he smiled back, “Now, if you want to stay for dessert, we have ice cream,” he offered.

“I think I’d just rather go home, if that’s okay,” you said.

“That’s totally fine, alright? I’ll go get Robby to take you home?” 

“Yes please,” you said, “Thank you,”

“Your welcome. I’ll see you soon,”

“Bye”

Robby came out a minute after Daniel had left, and immediately hugged you, “Are you okay?” he mumbled.

“I will be. I just want to go home,” you replied. 

“Okay, lets go, yeah?” he asked. You replied by nodding your head, yes.

**********

You and Robby had arrived at your house, and he walked you up to the front door. “Can you stay with me?” you asked.

“Yeah of course,”

You both made your way up the stairs and into your room. You grabbed some comfy clothes, and changed in the bathroom, before coming back to Robby.

“Are you feeling any better?” he asked.

“A little. Can we cuddle?” 

He just laid down in your bed, and opened his arms for you to lay in. You positioned yourself in his arms so your head was on his chest, listening to the steady sound of his heart beating.

Robby kissed the top of your head. You shifted your head to look up at him. He kissed your lips.

You knew that this boy would be the death of you.

@blackoutgirx

[tkc-info]

Confession At Night

OCtober 2021 day 2 - glass

2018

“Did you know that glass is made out of sand?” Oliver asked.

Cal hummed. She wasn’t paying much attention to him, but rather was laying on her back —heedless of how her scalp would be itching with sand for days— with her eyes trained on the sky. Tonight, like most nights, it was almost devoid of stars; yet Cal insisted, like most nights, on checking for her ‘second star to the right’.

“It’s molten at a very high temperature to create a whole new material.” Oliver continued. He was rambling, and knew it.

“Lovely.” Cal murmured noncommittally “That means that if we set this place on— ah, there!”

She clutched his shoulder (not his hoodie; she was wearing that) and yanked him down to the sand. Then, she pointed up at two stars in particular. “‘Second to the right, and straight on till morning’. That, Peter had told Wendy, was the way to Neverland.” she slapped his pectoral “I told you today was the day I’d find it.”

Oliver snorted. His parents had decided to bring them to a beach outing so that they would destress from school. Oliver, of course, knew the trip was but a plan to get him to see whether Cal was Saz, but Cal had proudly declared today would be her lucky day because ‘beaches weren’t all that polluted and shit’.

“I thought the place was called Wonderland.” he said as he propped himself up on his shoulders. Just to annoy Cal.

And indeed, Cal was close to enraged. “Neverland, asshole.” she lightly kicked him “Don’t compare a piece of art to such bloody rubbish.” she groaned, then sat up “Really, I don’t know what kind of crack Lewis Carroll was on when he wrote those books. I finished Alice Through The Looking Glass last week, and it’s all nonsensical. She goes through a mirror and ends up in a world similar to her own, but where giant insects take the train and laws are impossibly alien? Oliver, dude, what does jam tomorrow and jam yesterday but not jam today mean?”

Oliver shrugged. “As if I knew.”

But Cal’s words secretly bothered him. In his current state of tension, he couldn’t help but think of his homeland. Her homeland.

Mirror was a reflection of the only world Cal had ever known. In a metaphorical sense, a thin coat of glass separated her reality and the life she should have lived as Saz. The Kinship was much like the literary world she found so nonsensical: a united nation hidden in the depths of the Earth, twisted conservatism, beings who could pretty much become talking insects, people who could bend reality in unimaginable ways…

Cal stood up and walked to the freezing sea as a familiar guilt enveloped Oliver. There was also a wall of glass standing between his best friend and him. A one-way mirror that showed him everything about her, and her only what he was allowed to show Aboveground.

Heck, Oliver knew more about Cal than Cal herself. He knew what her parents were —had been— the position her aunts and uncles had in The Kinship, the friends that so fervently wished for her safety… and a dozen other secrets she should’ve been entitled to knowing.

Oliver looked at the sand, hesitating momentarily before deciding to go for it.

‘I’m sorry’, he wrote. In Sazla; Oliver may have grown up in Aboveground London, but Sazla still was his native tongue and the one he felt the most comfortable in.

The guilt over lying to Cal had began gnawing at him when he was around eight. At the time, he’d promised himself never to keep non-Saz secrets from her. He’d succeeded. At least for the most part. Recently he’d realised something about himself he needed to tell someone —Cal— but whenever the opportunity to tell his secret to her arose, Oliver always backed down.

Cal came back to him with her legs freezing wet; on her hands, the bottle of iced tea she’d buried underwater a few minutes ago. She plopped down on the sand, opened the bottle and chugged down half its contents. “Tea?” she offered Oliver, who took the bottle but didn’t move to drink from it.

This morning he’d promised himself he’d tell Cal that secret of his. No matter what. Oliver knew he had to tell her or else he’d explode.

“Oliver, what’s wrong?” Cal’s laidback demeanour promptly disappeared as she noticed the change in Oliver. Gingerly, her hand moved to grab his —Oliver noticed she’d began doing that when she wanted to comfort but didn’t have the necessary words.

Oliver squeezed her hand gratefully; closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and said, “I want to tell you something.” he opened his eyes and turned to her “Mind you, I’m irrationally scared of telling you this.”

Cal tensed. Oliver wasn’t allowed to do this, but he reached out to her and willed her shoulders to relax ever so slightly. Using his insignia helped release some of his own tension, and when he next spoke, his voice didn’t sound as scared as he’d feared. “I’m bisexual.”

He studied Cal’s face to see her reaction. At first, she only blinked at him —processing the information— but a second after his confession, she exhaled as if tremendously relieved. She used her free hand to also take Oliver’s, and pressed her forehead to his arm. Oliver could feel her silent laughter.

“Cal?” Oliver asked “Did you hear me? I’m bi.”

“Yes, yes. I did.” Cal drew back and met his eyes, a small smile grazed her lips “I just— Oliver I thought you were going to tell me you’d been diagnosed with something, or were moving to —I don’t know— Gloucestershire.” she smiled at him “But you’re bi. That’s amazing, dude.”

“Really?”

It was as if a part of the weigh he’d been carrying since childhood had been lifted off his shoulders; and if Oliver couldn’t quite walk straight, he now could at least walk on lighter feet.

“Of course it’s amazing.”

It wasn’t only that keeping unnecessary secrets from Cal hurt him. He had needed to tell someone, and to be reassured that his bisexuality was valid. No Saz would ever care about him not being straight, but Oliver lived at the other side of the wall of glass.

He’d heard his classmates say horrible things about queer people, and was terrified of what their reaction to him would be. Clara and Carter Whitaker always told their son not to care about his inferior’s ‘senseless bigotry’, but Oliver had to care. Otherwise he’d become the target of their hatefulness.

“Are you going to come out to everyone?” Cal eventually asked.

A breeze of salty air pulled her hair backwards, allowing Oliver to fully see her face: Cal’s eyes shone with fondness, and something else. Was it…? But no.

“I have to, don’t I?” Oliver shrugged; half achieving the confident tone he’d been going for.

“No.” Cal snorted, but wiggled closer to him “Your bisexuality is yours to share. No one’s entitled to knowing your secrets.”

“I know that. But I want to be out —or at least reach a point where if people don’t know I’m bi, then that’s on them— and talk about boys comfortably.”

Oliver didn’t ask for anything too extravagant, just to be recognised and respected. That wasn’t too hard, was it? His classmates and teachers would surely understand him.

But Cal frowned at him. Oliver thought she’d say something, but the only thing she did was lean against his shoulder silently. “I’ll kill whoever’s homophobic or biphobic to you.” she eventually said.

Oliver snorted. “You’re the best, CC.” he thanked, putting his arm around her shoulders and briefly kissing the top of her head.

“Oh, come on, don’t cover my hair in saliva.” Cal protested, but didn’t move.

“It’s already full of sand. How are you even going to get it off?”

Cal rolled her eyes. “You. I’m helping you dye your hair, you’re helping me wash mine.”

“Hm.”

The two sat in silence, then. Oliver allowed himself a contented smile as he basked in his first moments of being out. This was good, he thought. Just the feeling of being accepted and loved unquestioningly. And Cal had said it was amazing that he was bi. Oliver felt on top of the world.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you for telling me.”

Oliver quirked an eyebrow at her. “Prepare to hear it many more times. ‘I am bisexual’; it sounds good, doesn’t it?”

@oc-growth-and-development @wagnerthedragon @iloveallmyocs @littleturtle95

[hopefulobjectmiracle]

Is it weird that I was never that bothered with Kurt's behavior in Blame it on the Alcohol? I mean,the biphobic stuff he said annoyed me,but outside of that I can understand how frustrated he was: he finally met other gay boy who was literally everything he ever liked in a boy. At first he has a crush on other guy instead of him,tells him he doesn't want to ruin their friendship so they should just stay friends and later on experiments with a girl who clearly knew about his feelings for him but just didn't care. And I still wonder how he can be so calm at the end when he tries to comfort her instead of rubbing it in her face (which I would definitely do,though :DD).

nope! it's not that weird. and i agree with you, actually!! it might be my kurt bias speaking, but i sympathized with him throughout the entire episode, and i think rachel was far more at fault than he was.

as you said, i completely understand his frustration. for most of his life, he was all alone and was bullied for years because of his sexual orientation. men treated him as a pariah, and his first real crush turned out to be disastrously straight. then sam came along, and kurt was once again treated as dirty for wanting to sing with him. sam was okay with it, but finn shaming him and kurt's own internalized homophobia made him ditch sam and sing alone instead bc he felt guilty about asking a straight boy to sing with him.

and then, when he felt like he was at his lowest with the bullying, blaine came along, and for the first time, kurt felt seen in every way. blaine was gay, just like him. blaine knew what he'd been through. blaine understood him, blaine cared for him, blaine genuinely liked him for all that he was. of course kurt fell in love with him. and he thought blaine liked him back, but instead he had to deal with blaine asking out another guy on valentine's day. however, by the end of that ep, it seemed like they'd reached some sort of tentative acknowledgment of kurt's feelings and the idea of a possible romance between them.

...but then two episodes later, blaine gets sent into a tailspin about his own sexuality and kurt is forced with the possibility of losing the one person who he thought understood him and could relate to him. as he said in the actual ep, not only was blaine his best friend, but he was also someone he looked up to, and he was afraid that this would be taken away from him if blaine did what kurt never could do and fell in love with a girl.

(which is not blaine's fault, obviously - i don't blame him for anything that happened in this ep either.)

and of course, there's the fact that that kurt was in love with blaine and was horrified at the idea of him dating not just any girl, but rachel berry. rachel who gets all the solos he wanted. rachel who gets all of the recognition. rachel who gets to sing at competitions. rachel, who gets finn. rachel, who gets everything kurt wants while kurt is left behind in the dust. i don't blame kurt for being extremely upset about it.

and imo, rachel knowing about kurt's crush and what blaine meant to him yet still going after him was really, really shitty. as shown in 2x04, she was perfectly aware of how lonely he was, as shown in 2x08, it was clear that she understood the severity of the bullying situation, and in 2x12, kurt made it very clear that he was upset about the idea of blaine dating someone else. so why did she think it was okay to go after blaine and ask him out, especially since she didn't want him for anything more than his vocal talent and the idea of him possibly giving him 'eurasian-looking children?'

i just...rachel's behavior in this ep really, really pisses me off, especially since that gross asian-fetishizing comment is one of the very few references we get to blaine being asian in canon. mixed race people are so often treated like a fetish, particularly half-asian people like blaine, and it just makes me so mad that rachel, despite having a black dad, would say something like that.

imo this is one of her worst episodes, and her complete lack of regard towards kurt's feelings is one of the many reasons why i can't get on board with hummelberry as a friendship.

as for the biphobia - it wasn't great of him to say that, but i understand why he felt that way. he was a gay teenager in 2010 in the middle of conservative ohio and he hadn't grown up with any LGBTQ role models around him, so it's no wonder he had the outdated view (that was very common at the time) that bisexuals were secretly gay men in denial. i don't think it was OOC, and while it isn't right, it makes sense for his character and the time period the show was set in.

i just wish kurt had been called out on it properly instead of being 'proven right'...though that would require the writers themselves to not be biphobic, which we all know is impossible on glee 🥴

[slutauthority]

Hi, I guess this is venting because I don’t really want to talk about it on my own but I’m that anon that talked about saying biphobic things when I was in denial and identifying as a lesbian and everything like that. I think back then I believed that being bisexual was easier because bi ppl are most of the community according to numbers. That how could You possibly feel ignored when you make up the majority. Now it feels so strange because I do feel utterly isolated and forgotten about (p1)

Part2. And villianized at the same time. I wonder a lot if I’m being defensive and overly bitter and exaggerating things in my head. I feel like some sort of class traitor, and that there’s something wrong with me. Like if I was a more well-adjusted person, I would be either be a lesbian or straight, that something is broken inside of me that I can’t describe. I don’t really think of other bisexuals like that, at least not verbally.

hey friend, i have a lot of loved ones who generally feel the same. I pretty much felt the same for most of my time of like...id'ing as bisexual, in the beginning years lol. but even STILL Im just now starting to be more assertive about bisexuals in lgbt discussions, but like. that doesn't make it automatically easy, bc you do really get like...dismissed as annoying and privileged.

making up the majority is obviously going to make people want to ignore specific experiences of biphobia. and you don't feel like there's anything that bisexuals are facing that could need any more attention than other LGBT matters. I felt v in the background when i came out as bi and i just thought that's what it was. and i say that like, i just naturally thought when i came out as bisexual, i didn't need room or space for my issues bc i was in the end, bisexual. i was...i guess, supposed to be more in the background. obviously i knew bisexual ppl didn't just show up in the 1970's, lol. But I didn't care to look at anything truly like. focused on it. i didn't want to insert myself if someone was MORE gay than me. and it IS very isolating. so many people in my life have just eased into id'ing as bisexual, despite having no change in their lifestyle, it just finally was something that they were ready to approach more like....idk tenderly bc its not something they want to think too much on. bc its uncomfortable and thats v normal for bi ppl coming to terms with themselves. I think people who are questioning and MAY be bisexual, struggle with feeling like they'll be taken seriously or that it's even worth a conversation bc a lot of them don't want to even really have a label, least of all bisexual. and a lot of people ALSO don't like to look at why it's a word they don't like. and why they are so hesitant to use it openly.

i don't want you to think that these are feelings you brought upon yourself in any way. honestly, what you're saying is like. very much exactly what most of us grapple with when it comes to internalized biphobia. seriously, its something that hasn't been treated with kindness and when ur coming to terms with being bisexual, you have to come to terms with all the biphobic insights and stereotypes you've internalized. which unfortunately just informs all the biphobia you will deal with if you come out as bi.

i didnt mean for this to be so long winded, but honestly i dont have the perfect words to like...make it all feel better, bc it stings and still does, even when you've spent time with it and unpacked it. i can only reiterate that there ARE a lot of loving and supportive people and resources within our community and i know, i kno, i kno. it really doesn't feel like it sometimes, but i do know from experience that they're out there. I hope you have some comfort and peace with this at some point. <3

[baldinggoat]

I wrote a really long post about playersexuality about a year ago mostly targeting other crpgs, but I updated it a bit and decided to throw it on this blog too. It’s a bit repetitive, and it isn’t perfect, but it’s important to me that I’ve been trying to parse my direct feelings towards the phenomenon for a long time and I wanted to write it out. 

It mostly came from this article/post, and then kind of grew from there. It isn’t a direct criticism of Baldur’s Gate 3 or how Larian studios is writing queer sexuality, but if the shoe fits...well...

First of this all comes from someone with a trans and bi perspective. So it’s all subjective obviously. None of this is about discrediting bisexual characters, but critically analyzing how games depict queer sexuality. I just want more people to understand how playersexuality does hurt gay people who want gay characters, and hurt bi people who want more tangible representation and not a “schrodinger's” bisexuality.

Bisexuality/pansexuality isn’t necessarily being attracted to someone regardless or despite gender. It’s being attracted to more then one gender. Gender does, in fact, matter In relationships. Its frustrating really. My relationship to gender means a lot to me. It’s shaped my whole life. When I want someone to love me, I want them to love me for me AND acknowledge my gender. It’s a part of who I am. I don’t want it to be ignored. I’ve never had the privilege to ignore my gender, and I’ve never had the privilege of other people ignoring it either, since I’m trans. It’s not my only quality, but it’s a big part of my personal story and growth. Whenever I want to date anyone, I always have to have a conversation with them about our sexualities and my gender.

When you make a game with a story about fictional characters, you usually want the audience to care about said characters. You want to make it possible for the audience to empathize with them in some way. But in the end, all they ever will be is the game developer’s IDEA of what a person is, never an actual person. How sexuality and gender are presented in the story is all but an idea of how the game developers want sexuality and gender to be presented to the audience.

The bottom line is this: game companies have incentive for making money first. Game devs rarely care about giving lgbtq people a character that has an experience that the audience can empathize with. The audience that includes cishet people, because when everyone empathizing with fictional lgbtq characters, that’s what gives us “representation”. Because that’s what that actually means. Representation is about speading stories about our experiences being lgbtq to help other lgbtq people know that they aren’t alone, and also that it’s not a bad thing to be lgbtq. Playersexual characters don’t acknowledge that experience in their narrative, they aren’t representation.

And I real human being doesn’t need to tell you their sexuality. An actual gay or bisexual person doesn’t need to disclose anything about their past to “prove” their gay or bisexual. That’s because it’s an invasion of privacy, and when someone does tell you these things its because they trust you. It’s why “coming out of the closet” is something that exists. We are NOT entitled to know these things, yet everyone is assumed straight because that’s what is expected, so telling someone these things is an act of trust. But when it comes to fictional characters, there’s never that invasion of privacy. There’s no need to respect their boundaries, because as an omniscient audience we’re able to see different, imaginary perspectives. A game developer can always give us a clear indication of a character’s sexuality, and they can even do it without the characters stating it (although they should because that helps normalize people talking about their sexuality). It never has to be obfuscated or ignored. If it is obfuscated in some way, it’s because it’s the game developers’ intention. They don’t want to make a character’s sexuality clear and therefore, don’t actually care about lgbtq people.

So you play a videogame. There’s a character who admits they have feelings for the player. This character never talks about the gender of your character when it comes to the relationship. The character also, interestingly enough, never talks about a history of relationships with the same gender or mentions their attraction to the same gender. Even if they do, it’s a one off comment, innuendo, and/or never a full admission, something small that can be missed and ignored without deeper thought. (Also using correct pronouns isn’t acknowledging you’re in a relationship with someone who’s the same gender btw, it’s just common fucking courtesy).

The only way you ever even know that the character even is willing to date the same gender is if your character is there, and willing to date them. If your player character didn’t exist, you would never know this character dates the same gender. It’s schrodinger's bisexuality! The npc’s sexuality is not there unless you, the player, make it a part of your story. It doesn’t belong to the character. I hope that makes sense, because in the end the player is doing all the work for the writers. I also find it extremely unrealistic that in these situations, the characters are in serious romantic/sexual relationships and never talk about their history with dating the same gender, even casually.

What truly makes me sad though is how fandom, especially other bi people, will claim playersexuality as legitimate bisexual representation. It’s truly depressing that videogame writers have been able to find this loophole, use it, and abuse it. It gives game companies, that absolutely do not care about actually representing lgbtq people in their stories, credit where no credit is due. Of course I’m not trying to go after bi fans, and they aren’t wrong to claim these characters are bisexual, because that’s the whole point of calling it schrodinger's bisexuality. I personally don’t think infighting with other fans about whether a character is actually bisexual or not will get anyone anything except a migraine. What I do think, is people should be more critical about how videogame companies are presenting sexuality in their stories, and focus on criticizing that.

Edit: On a personal note, I also hate fandom using playersexuality to try to say the character’s sexuality is up for “interpretation” so they “headcanon” said character as straight or gay. That’s just biphobic. But, when trans/bi/gay people are talking about playersexuality, it’s usually from a more constructive outlook, where we just want the game studios to be held more accountable for erasure. This is also why I prefer the term “schrodinger's bisexuality”. Bisexual when you want them to be, not bisexual when you don’t want them to be.

I know people want the comfort, the ease, and the simplicity that playersexuality brings. I know it’s been used in games for years, and at one time it was the only queer content and representation games had. But times are changing, and game companies need to change. We need actual Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Trans characters, not a schrodinger's bisexuality. If you allow anyone and everyone to be able to romance any character regardless of gender, then you don’t have to worry about straight players being mad a character they want to romance is gay, or lgbt players being upset a character is straight.

Continuing to use playersexuality isn’t an “everyone’s happy” solution to people asking for more gay/bi characters in videogames. It’s obvious this has everything to do with money, since it’s making games viable for a wider audience and not actually giving queer people representation. It’s also painfully obvious when you have so much undeniable m/f that is central to the story.

I know game studios aren't a monolith. I know developing a game is usually convoluted and rarely linear. I also know it’s a company, and there are “layers” of writing, and things tend to go through a grind before they get green-lite. I know there’s never a singular person making decisions how character’s sexuality are depicted, and theres always more going on behind doors we may never know. Maybe game studios using playersexuality are trying to depict more lgbtq representation and some “big man” up top wont let them. But I highly doubt it, and think it has to do with marketability, because this is a product that is on the market.

TL; DR: I’m an annoying transgenderer who’s entitled and believes videogames should cater to me. Making companions/npcs playersexual, especially all of them, is a horrible, lazy, homophobic, and biphobic writing decision. Game companies don’t care about lgbtq people. Support lgbtq people, help donate to lgbtq content creators when you can, and help lgbtq people in fandom feel safe.

Aka Donate to my ko-fi lol

[thatsamericano]

That Thing That Isn’t Biphobia

Pairings/Characters: America/Romano. America and Japan brotp. Mentions of Belmano and past Prumano. Very brief mentions of Giripan, Gerita, and Lietpol. Human AU.

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Mentions of biphobia and violence (though no actual biphobia or violence). Mentions of ace/arophobia from Alfred’s parents, who don’t appear in the story.

Word Count: 3317

Summary: Alfred thinks he’s biphobic because he gets unreasonably angry and upset whenever he sees his roommate having relationships with men or women. He hates himself for being prejudiced against Savino, but an honest conversation with another friend helps him realize his “biphobia” wasn’t biphobia at all.

Note: Prequel to That Thing Where You Fall In Love With Your Best Friend. Inspired by the reddit story of the “straight” guy who fell in love with his gay roommate and mistook his jealousy for homophobia.

Alfred was supposed to be eating lunch with Kiku today, but after fifteen minutes he had only moved the sushi around the plate with his chopsticks several times. Guilt was gnawing away at his mind, and he couldn’t focus on anything else, even sushi that he knew would be tasty since Kiku had chosen the restaurant this time.

At least he wasn’t nauseous, like he would be when Savino was around his girlfriend.

Emma was perfectly sweet, and Alfred had no reason to dislike her. She was genuinely friendly to him and Tolys, even if her main reason for stopping by the apartment was to spend time with her boyfriend. She and Vinny were affectionate, but they didn’t engage in enough PDA to bother any reasonable person. Yet every time Savino would casually drop his arm around her shoulders and she’d snuggle up to his side, Alfred had to look away to keep his stomach from roiling. Every time he called her some sappy Italian endearment and she giggled and replied to him with something in Flemish, Alfred wanted to drive spikes into his ears just so he’d never have to hear them again. When they kissed in front of him, Alfred felt like screaming or crying, and he didn’t understand why.

The same thing had happened a few months ago when he was hooking up with Gilbert, that albino German dude he’d met because Vinny’s little brother was dating Gilbert’s little brother. Gilbert and Savino didn’t call each other sappy nicknames, because it was just a friends with benefits arrangement, but they did spend a few nights together. One morning, Alfred was in the middle of eating a bowl of Cap’n Crunch when Gilbert emerged from Savino’s room wearing only a pair of boxers. After nearly choking on his cereal, Alfred finished his breakfast as quickly as he could and left the apartment to circle the block five times, which calmed him down enough to refrain from punching some poor guy just for having sex with his roommate. By the time Alfred had returned, Gilbert had left, thank fucking God. But whenever he thought of the things they must have done together or the things Savino had done with Emma, a painful tightness seized Alfred’s chest, and it became extraordinarily difficult to breathe. Even after they had gone back to being just friends, Gilbert liked to visit occasionally, and he liked to tease Savino with comments made him splutter and blush. Every time he saw Savino’s reaction to some comment Gilbert had made, Alfred felt unreasonably angry, and he wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off Gilbert’s face with his fist.

Alfred knew it was wrong. Savino had never judged him for being ace/aro, and Alfred had absolutely no right to judge him for being bi. Savino was an amazing friend and a wonderful roommate, and he deserved all the happiness in the world. He certainly deserved better than living with a biphobic piece of shit like Alfred. What kind of fucked up asshole couldn’t stand to see one of their best friends happy just because the way they were happy was different from what they wanted for themselves?

Alfred hadn’t mentioned a word of how he felt to anyone. He didn’t want to hurt Vinny with this stupid prejudice that came out of nowhere, and he didn’t want everyone in his life to hate him the way he deserved. Savino, of course, wouldn’t want anything to do with Alfred if he knew, and neither would Tolys, who was bi too. All of his friends would be disgusted by the ugly and vicious sentiments Alfred harbored, and he would have to move back in with the shitty parents who thought his asexuality was a silly, immature phase he would grow out of eventually once he really came out of the closet. Even his own twin would want nothing to do with him. Mattie was straight, but unlike Alfred, he was a decent person who would never hate someone for being themselves.

But the sad truth was that he didn’t hate Savino. Vinny didn’t smile that much compared to Alfred, but when he did, it resembled the sun coming through the clouds. When he laughed at Alfred for doing something dumb, Alfred felt giddy, and he wanted to do something even stupider just to hear that beautiful sound again. He was a talented artist and an amazing cook, and Alfred had grown addicted both to Savino’s cappuccinos and to sitting at the counter and chatting with him while he worked. Vinny was like a human space heater, and he always smelled like fancy cologne Alfred wasn’t sophisticated enough to use himself. When they hugged, Alfred never really wanted to let go. The idea of not having Savino in his life was the worst thing Alfred could imagine, so he had to pretend everything was just fine and that nothing had changed.

He was frowning down at his sushi, too heartsick to eat any of it, when Kiku hesitantly spoke up. “Alfred-kun, are you all right? You’ve been unusually quiet, and you haven’t touched your food today.”

Alfred sighed and made eye contact with him. “I’m fine. Just not hungry, I guess.”

Kiku looked worried. “If you aren’t in the mood for sushi, we could go somewhere else. I don’t want you to skip lunch because you were trying to accommodate me.”

Alfred set down his chopsticks, which he hadn’t been using for their intended purpose. “It’s not the sushi, dude. I’ve just been feeling kind of off lately.”

“Off how?”

Alfred hesitated. Kiku was his close friend. In some ways, he understood Alfred better than anyone else because he was asexual too. The only difference was that he was gray-romantic, because he had gotten very close to someone once, and he wasn’t sure if what he’d felt for Herakles years ago was romantic or not.

That meant Kiku might be attracted to guys at least a little. So he would see the way Alfred had reacted to the mere idea of Savino being with a guy as a personal attack, and rightly so. He wouldn’t want to be friends with someone like that, and Alfred couldn’t blame him.

Alfred hunched in on himself and fixed his gaze determinedly on the table top. “You shouldn’t worry about it. It’s a dumb problem, and I need to get over it.”

“But you’re my friend,” Kiku stated plainly. “Of course I’ll worry when you aren’t acting like yourself. I care about you.”

Alfred took a deep breath and blinked his eyes rapidly to stop himself from crying in the middle of a Japanese restaurant, which would unnecessarily embarrass everyone around him. Kiku’s concern only made him feel worse. He didn’t deserve it at all.

“I think I’m a bad person,” Alfred muttered. “I might’ve picked up on some prejudices from my parents, but it’s not like I want to feel this way. And I can’t blame it all on other people. It’s my responsibility to quit being a dick to people for no reason.”

“You’re prejudiced? Against who?” Kiku already sounded annoyed at him, and he hadn’t even heard everything. He’d barely heard anything.

“Bi people, I think. Either that or I just really don’t like Europeans, which isn’t okay either.” Alfred squeezed his eyes shut, dreading Kiku’s reaction.

For a long moment, all Alfred heard was the sound of people at others eating and talking to each other. Finally, Kiku spoke. “Alfred, that doesn’t make any sense.”

“It’s biphobia, dude! Of course it doesn’t make sense.”

“But both your roommates are bi. And European, for that matter.”

Alfred groaned in despair and fisted his hands in his hair. “I know. And if they found out, they’d hate me forever and want nothing more to do with me.” Fuck, if he couldn’t make this go away, he was going to lose two of his best friends. In addition to Kiku, who he’d probably lost already.

“You’ve always seemed so fond of Tolys and Savino.” Weirdly, Kiku didn’t sound pissed off. He sounded like he was trying to reason through a complex math problem. “If you were prejudiced against them, wouldn’t this have come up sooner? You’ve been living with them for years, and you never mentioned having a problem with their orientation before.”

“Because I didn’t have a problem before! I didn’t know I was like this until Vinny started hooking up with that German dude a few months ago. I saw him coming out of Vinny’s bedroom one time, and ever since then I’ve hated Gilbert for no fucking reason.”

“Knowing they’d been together in that way made you uncomfortable?”

Alfred grimaced. “It was more than uncomfortable. More like angry. Really angry. I had to leave the apartment to calm myself down. I still feel like punching something whenever Gil teases him and makes him turn red. And when I think about them doing stuff with each other, my chest feels weird and it’s hard to breathe.”

Alfred dared to glance up at Kiku, who had a carefully neutral expression on his face. “I see. And what about his girlfriend, Emma? She seemed nice when I met her.”

Alfred sighed. “Emma is nice. But it’s a similar deal, only more sappy because they’re an actual couple. I feel queasy when they cuddle on the couch, and I feel so upset when they kiss in front of me, even if it’s not like they’re Frenching for five minutes or whatever. I can’t stand it when I hear them getting all sappy in Italian or Flemish. And I’m just as mad if I think about them having sex, which is why it’s probably biphobia and not homophobia.” Alfred chuckled weakly, disgusted with himself. “Apparently, I’m such a crappy friend I can’t let Savino be happy, even with a girl.” God, Alfred loathed himself.

Kiku’s next question surprised him completely. “How do you feel about Feliks? They’re still with Tolys, aren’t they?”

“Yeah, they are. Feliks is cool. I like hanging out with them. I think I might have accidentally gotten them a little too addicted to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, though.” Alfred smiled fondly at the thought of Tolys’s partner. Feliks was a fun person. Alfred had never had a problem with them.

“Were you ever uncomfortable when they showed affection in front of you?”

Alfred furrowed his brow. “Not that I can think of? But maybe it’s because Feliks and Tolys have been together for a while, so I’m used to it.” They’d been together since before Alfred developed this sudden, unexpected biphobia problem. God, he hoped that he didn’t start hating Feliks too. That would really suck.

Kiku nodded to himself. “I think I’ve figured out what’s going on. And contrary to what you told me, I don’t think you’re biphobic.”

“You don’t?”

“No. I think you’re jealous.”

“But why would I be jealous? Because Vinny goes on dates and hooks up with people, and I’ve never been with anybody? That doesn’t make any sense. I never wanted to be more than friends with somebody.”

Kiku gave him a pitying look. “But I think you do now. I think something must have changed, and now you have feelings for Savino. You were jealous of his most recent partners because you wish you were them.”

For a moment, Alfred was too stunned to say anything. He glanced down at his uneaten sushi. “But I don’t like people that way. I can’t. I never have.” He felt scared because so much of his identity was shifting away underneath him. It hadn’t been easy for Alfred to tell people who he was, especially when he had to explain it to people who wouldn’t inherently understand him the way Kiku did. Not everyone had accepted him. His own parents had made him feel like crap for it. He didn’t want to prove them right, because asexuality and aromanticism weren’t phases.

Every time he told people he was ace/aro, he’d been sure of himself. He’d been more certain of that than anything. But now he didn’t know who he was anymore.

“Alfred, how do you feel about Savino when he isn’t with another person?”

“Just being around him makes me happy. But that could totally be a friendship thing, right? It’s normal to feel happy around your friends. I’m happy around you and Tolys too!” But maybe it wasn’t normal to compare your friend’s smile to the sun or to think that the sound of their laugh was beautiful. Maybe you could enjoy hugging your friends, but something other than friendship was going on if you felt so warm and safe in their arms that you never wanted to let go.

Alfred glanced up into Kiku’s eyes, which were a warm, dark brown, filled with compassion and understanding. He felt calmer looking at his friend’s face, but he didn’t feel enraptured. He didn’t feel mesmerized when he stared into Kiku’s eyes, like he could do nothing but sit across from him and stare at him for hours. He had felt like that with Vinny.

Alfred coughed awkwardly and looked off to the side as he felt heat starting to creep up his neck and over his cheeks. His thoughts were weird, embarrassing, and really confusing.

“How do you feel about the idea of being in a relationship with him?” Kiku asked.

“I hadn’t really thought of it before,” Alfred admitted. “But it doesn’t sound bad.” Not much would change, really. They’d still be close, just in a different way. He’d be the one snuggling up to Vinny instead of Emma, and that would probably feel nice, considering how much Alfred liked hugging him. He’d be the person getting called something like “tesoro,” and the idea of a special nickname made him feel fluttery, just like he felt when Vinny had started calling him “Fredo,” only more intense. And the idea of kissing Savino on the lips instead of just that cheek kissing thing he did with his friends…

Okay, that made Alfred nervous. But not bad nervous, more like “I’m about to go on the biggest rollercoaster at the theme park” nervous. Alfred had always enjoyed the thrill of rollercoasters, the experience of screaming his head off as his heart raced a mile a minute. If kissing could feel like that, then he definitely wanted to kiss Savino. At some point, he might even want to do more than kiss Savino, which wasn’t something he’d ever considered before. The mere fact that he was even thinking about having sex without immediately recoiling said a lot.

Alfred grabbed his drink and quickly slurped up a lot of soda through his straw. He felt like he was about to explode from all the feelings inside him, and the soda helped cool him down a little. He kept a tight grip on the glass afterwards.

“I like him,” he confessed, near tears. “I like Savi so, so much, and I have no idea what this means for me. I don’t understand who I am anymore.”

“You’re the same person you always were, even if you’re discovering something new about yourself. And you’re still my friend. That will never change.”

Alfred released the glass slowly. “Thanks, dude. That means a lot.”

“If you like, I could help you look on the AVEN website sometime. You might not be completely asexual and aromantic, but I’m sure there’s a term out there for what you’re experiencing. It might help you make sense of things.”

“I appreciate that. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad I’m not a secretly horrible biphobic asshole, but my head’s kind of a mess right now.”

Kiku chuckled softly. “That’s understandable.”

Alfred finally felt good enough to eat something, so he picked up a piece of sushi with his fingers, since chopsticks were still awkward for him to use, even if he’d eaten with Kiku many times. Fortunately, it wasn’t considered rude to eat sushi with your hands. Alfred chewed his food, and he thought things over. “Vinny has a girlfriend, and he seems really happy with her. Having a crush on him and knowing I have a crush on him is gonna be awkward as hell. Maybe not as awkward as thinking I’m an evil prejudiced monster, but still.”

“I’m sure you’ll manage.”

“I probably shouldn’t tell him that part. But I do want to tell him and Tolys something once I figure all this stuff out. And my brother too. But telling my parents is… God, that’s gonna be a fucking nightmare. They were so shitty to me before, and they’re gonna be really smug and annoying if turns out they were right. I don’t wanna play into stereotypes like that.” Most people who said they were ace/aro didn’t change their minds later, but in his parent’s view, asexuality and aromanticism weren’t real, valid experiences, and any person who said they were asexual or aromantic was lying to themselves and using those labels as a mask for something else. Or maybe they just hadn’t found “the right person.”

Alfred had never intentionally lied about his sexuality, but his parents wouldn’t see it that way. This stupid crush on his roommate was reinforcing stereotypes that hurt people like the really awesome friend who had taken him out to lunch today and helped him realize his feelings, and Alfred felt guilty about that.

Kiku had an uncomfortable look on his face. “It’s not your responsibility to represent all people on the ace and aro spectrums. You have just as much of a right to explore how you feel as anyone else does. I think you should give yourself time to do that and only tell other people about this when you feel ready.”

“Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Right now, I don’t even know what to tell people.” Alfred picked up another piece of sushi and started to eat it.

“You told me today. That’s a good start.”

Alfred waited to swallow his bite, and then he gave Kiku a toothy, grateful smile. Kiku smiled back at him, and they finished their lunch together in a much more relaxed mood. Alfred didn’t have the dark cloud of guilt hanging over his head anymore, even if realizing he might be in love with one of his roommates gave him a lot of new things to worry about.

After they finished their food, they split the bill based on what they had ordered. Kiku had to take the bus back to work, so they would part ways outside the restaurant.

Alfred was a little surprised when Kiku inched closer with a shy look on his face and threw his arms around him. He wasn’t normally big on the whole physical affection thing.

Alfred returned the hug and laughed a little. “What’s all this about?”

“After our conversation today, I thought you might need it. Take care, Alfred.”

“Yeah, you too. Talk to you soon, bro.”

Kiku pulled away, nodded, and turned around to start walking to the bus stop. Alfred headed in the opposite direction, and he reflected on what had just happened.

Hugging Kiku was nice, but it didn’t make him feel tingly and floaty like hugging Savino did. Alfred appreciated the hug as a friendly gesture, especially since Kiku wasn’t the world’s huggiest person, but it had been easy to let go of Kiku when he wanted to leave. His arms didn’t feel empty, the way they did when Vinny stepped out an embrace, muttering under his breath about Alfred’s clinginess with a scarlet blush on his face.

Alfred didn’t feel the same way towards Savino he did to his other friends, but that was okay. Alfred was confused and a little scared by everything he’d realized today, but he wasn’t a terrible person, and he would figure things out eventually. He would be okay too.