#someone explain to me why i opened my anon askbox again

[sparkliingdust]

Most of the drama isn’t centered on him being in a relationship, everyone in this fandom is not dreaming of fucking him or marrying him. Many people are pissed about the lack of responsibility of not having a mask and traveling during a pandemic, to a country most common folk have been banned to travel to. On top of that the pics scream messy pr. So if they are indeed dating or screwing, it’s a stupid way to introduce your new relationship to the world.

Actually, a lot of outrage on social media last night was fans making it seem like she’s just a one-night stand or “he’s her jailer and she wants to escape.”  They’re just pap photos, and I don’t think they have any true intention of revealing anything. Then again, I don’t analyze everything as whether or not it’s good PR. Also, the Chris Evans tag is always overwhelmed with fanfics that make him our husband, boyfriend, father of our kids, etc. Maybe not everyone fantasizes about him, but a big portion does. (I’m not judging, to each their own). So I wouldn’t have been compelled to make my original post if there wasn’t fervor online.

I understand outrage of them not wearing a mask, but at the same time, I see people do the same thing in the parking lot at grocery stores where I live. When people are walking to and from their car, or unloading groceries in the trunk, they’re more than 6 ft from other people and have their masks down around their neck or take it off. And then once they’re inside Wal-Mart or whatever, they wear their mask. Maybe I’m naive but that was my assumption of seeing them go to and from their cars, and maybe they they wore one inside? They also apparently attended a private members club at 1am(?). And no one else was around except the car handler (who wasn’t wearing a mask either) and the hotel manager (who was wearing a mask). Also, maybe they tested negative and he felt it was okay to travel. Everyone thought it was adorable when Chris was helping Scott move across the country and a tenant took a picture of Chris in his truck without a mask. But now with Lily, it’s a huge deal? I don’t think a few pap photos constitutes us assuming that he didn’t take necessary precautions while actually traveling. At the end of the day, we don’t know. It sucks, but there’s nothing else we can really do about it. Just make sure we do our part and wear a mask?

[naviavu]

hello !!! can i ask for hcs for obey me boys when they find out that mc is living in an abusive hosuehold? i saw that your askbox is open and i'm just in a really REALLY bad place right now

yes, dearest, you absolutely can <333 may i ask how you are, anon? my inbox is always open if you need someone to talk to. as someone who’s also living in a toxic household, writing this brought me a bit percent of comfort so i hope it also does the same to you, anon! 

warnings: self-harm, suicide attempt, overdose, abusive household, cursing, sexual assault, overall has very abusive themes (done towards mc), comfort (by the brothers) also not edited

part i (older brothers) // part ii (satan and asmo) // part iii (the twins)

Older Brothers finding out that MC lives in an abusive household

LUCIFER

He knows from the start, if there are any restraining orders or records in your application form. 

If there are no records, Lucifer is observant enough to notice the warning signs-- flinching when Mammon or Levi is too loud in the dinner table, your pulse picking up when Satan changes his tone from kind to menacing in a quick second, laughing uncomfortably when Asmo’s hands wander too close where it shouldn’t be, your eyes widening in every tight hug Beel gives, and being wary of Belphie in general even though you’ve made up already. 

Prideful as always, he told himself that it wasn’t his business until he started seeing you as family-- regardless if his feelings developed platonically or romantically. His family is his business and there’s no way in hell that he’s letting you go back to the human world if you aren’t safe. He shoots you a text to come meet him to have an important discussion.

Your heart hammered in your chest as you open the door to his private study. What could be so important to discuss at midnight? Has Lucifer... finally caught on? Gods, no no no.

“MC, I’ve noticed some things that...” Lucifer trails off, explains calmly, and it still catches you off-guard. You stutter. You ramble until you’re in tears and collapse on your knees on the polished floor, scared and terrified because you can’t lie or he’ll punish you--

You feel Lucifer’s coat on your shoulders. instincts kick in and you cling to him, feeling like a lost child over again.

Lucifer carries you to his chair, asking you if you’re comfortable enough to tell your story. “You don’t have to tell me, MC. I’m sorry if I pushed you with that question.” 

“But I hope you know that you’re precious to me, and I’ll protect you in any way that I can.” He says finished, determined, and you break out in sobs again as you finally tell him about your story: all the abuse, the pain, the unwanted touches, even the one you inflicted upon yourself just to feel something.

Lucifer listens. your abusers are sure not to see another day.

MAMMON

Let’s face it: Mammon is an abuse survivor himself. He might not be good in verbally comforting others, but trust me when I say he’s the best in listening and generally being there for you. It shows in his actions.

You were having your weekly Saturday movie night, sitting side by side when a scene scares Mammon and he shouts. Loudly. 

You jump out of your seat and run.

“Fuck, did ‘ya see that MC? Totally wasn’t scared-- MC? Where did ‘ya go?” Mammon looks at the back of his couch. Under the tennis table. On his bed. “Hey, human! Why did ‘ya leave me?”

Mammon hears soft sobs from his closet. He walks up carefully. “A-are you crying, MC? Why--”

“No!” It’s your turn to shout now. There are fresh streaks of bloody self-inflicted scratches on your arms and Mammon’s confusion turns to worry in an instant. “I’m sorry for running, f-for hiding, please don’t hurt me, I’m not gonna do it again I swear-- please!”

When Mammon grabs your wrists, you cry and beg harder and honey, it broke his heart in a million pieces.

He leads you to his bath, where he gently helps you wash your wounds. You won’t stop crying and saying sorry over and over again. Mammon always tried to be strong in hopes to impress you but fuck it.

He is now crying with you. 

After cleaning your wounds, he wordlessly led you to his bed to rest. The silence suffocates him, and Mammon knows he should comfort you but he is so scared of saying the wrong thing. 

“MC--” “ Mammon--” You speak at the same time. He urges you to go on, and his hands that holds you close shake.

“Mammon... do you also intend to... to-- ravish me?” You ask, looking down on the floor while Mammon felt like everything stopped. “Please let me go, I won’t tell anyone, o-or if not, just please be gentle,” Your voice cracks in the end and Mammon breaks.

“Never in a million years, MC! I-- Fuck,” he sobs, and your own lips quiver. “I didn’t know, MC. I’m so sorry for what happened to you, I didn’t mean to shout and hurt you in the process, I’ve been always like this around you and my brothers and...” Oh. Oh no. Does that mean that there were times that you felt unsafe around him without him knowing? “I’m so so sorry for everything.”

He moves to hug you but stops himself. “Can I... Can I hug you?”

He only does when you verbally say yes and you both sob in each others arms. The night ended with both of you in his bed, telling him stories of your experiences in the human world and your household. Mammon nods and listens, and you don’t see how his tears keep running, but you notice how his arms are snug against your body like he’s afraid to let go.

Mammon also doesn’t want you to go back when your year ends but he will not tell Lucifer immediately, not without your consent.

On RAD, he’ll hover closer when you walk beside him but not with his old greedy, possessive way but because he genuinely wants to protect you. Everyday, he’ll be outside waiting for you at the end of your class even though his own class is located three buildings away. 

Mammon would also try to comfort you in his own way: by showering you gifts and trinkets that remind him of you. He wants you to feel appreciated just for merely existing, and that he can see a piece of you in his world every where he goes.

Congrats, you now have a personal butler that would put Barbatos to shame <3

LEVIATHAN

You sometimes forget that this boy is the Grand Admiral of Hell’s Navy.

He knows the look in someone’s eyes when they are absolutely terrified and about to surrender their life, and that’s the way he sees you one night you were sprawled out on your bathroom floor.

You weren’t responding to your DDD when you’re supposed to be with him in an important raid. Since his Henry is the only person he is willingly going to go out of his room for (and because he’s worried) he barges inside your with no warning.

It’s canon that Levi uses his smell to detect people. So when he doesn’t see you lounging in your bed like usual, he enters the room further to search for you. Only then he notices the amount of anxiety and fear you radiated in the air and he panics.

He enters your bathroom and Levi saw his worst nightmare come true. His best friend is lying on the floor and-- where did you even get those hellsmoke sleeping pills? It’s lethal for humans! “MC! what did you do?”

“I’m sorry, I-I don’t wanna go Levi. I don’t wanna go--” You sob, body shaking and he wastes no time to scoop you up and carry you in his arms. He calls for Lucifer, for Mammon, for the rest of his brothers, and it’s a tone they haven’t heard from Leviathan in a long time-- the command of a Grand Admiral. In a split second, they were all in your presence and ready to help on whatever way they can.

You spend three days passed out on Lord Diavolo’s castle, but you survive. Every single day, Leviathan is by your side.

When you wake, you see him napping against a Ruri-chan plushie. You gently flick his forehead. “Earth to my Lord of Shadows?”

“MC?” Levi gasps, and he immediately holds your hand in his. “You’re awake! I was so worried, everyone was worried, I was too slow and why-- why did I see you in that state, MC?” He cries, and you cup his cheek to wipe his tears.

All Leviathan wants is honesty and answers, so you give him just that. You tell your story, your past, and how it followed you here in Devildom and drove you to purchase those pills in an attempt to overdose. He listens and cries by your side.

He’s not unfamiliar with those feelings of helplessness but it broke his heart to see you suffering from them too. “MC... please don’t go back. please. I-- I’ll do anything to make you feel safe, make you feel comfortable here in the House of Lamentation and I’ll even stop talking shit about myself because that’s what you want just please. Don’t leave. I can’t let you be taken away from me again.”

Leviathan starts going to face to face classes more instead of online classes just to spend more time with you. It’s not so bad going outside when he has you by his side. On the positive note, he gets more chances to make you smile every day. 

He gives you freedom to choose whether to tell Lucifer or not, but ultimately convinces you to do it.

You’re his Henry. and he’ll be damned if he ever lost you.

[sweetjekyll]

Under The Same Roof, part 2 — BBH

pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader

genre: Roommate / Flatmate AU, one-shot, friends to lovers, mutual pining, fluff, blind date rating: teen and up warnings: tiniest and slightest bit of angst and jealousy, slightly suggestive towards the end word count: 5.2k

summary: Baekhyun and Y/N have been flatmates for a while and romance is in the air.

Requested: Part 2 was highly requested by both known readers and anons, so I hope you all enjoy the continuation of the first part! (keyword “roof” + sentence “Oh my God. You’re in love with her.” from this writing game post.)

Masterlist — PART 1

A/N: aaaaah it’s finally here! Merry Christmas everyone and happy holidays. I hope you’re healthy and surrounded with love, and I hope all of you are having a good time even if you don’t celebrate Christmas. Thank you to everyone who supported the first part of this story and patiently waited for the second part, I hope you will like this one as much as the first if not more! I made it way longer than the first part and added a bonus ending. Have fun reading! stay safe ❤

⟶ To my dear readers: feedback is highly encouraged and important! as it gives me motivation to write with more passion, knowing that you like what you are reading. Please LIKE and REBLOG so more people can find this and read it. ❤ My askbox is always open for questions or to chat ❤

Enjoy! ❤

The guys could’ve spent practically all night playing games, but Chanyeol had other plans in mind after the short chat he had with Sehun and Baekhyun about the latter’s crush on his roommate. Sehun was never one to turn down an invite to drink with his friends no matter the day of the week, so the fact that he agreed immediately to Chanyeol’s suggestion when he asked the two if they wanted to go have a drink at the bar Y/N and Baekhyun worked, it was an easy “yes”. You would’ve had about an hour and a half until it was closing time at 11PM, as it was a Thursday anyway.

Baekhyun on the other hand wasn’t that easy to convince. He was supposed to work the following morning and be at his best to serve freshly brewed coffee to university students, professors and other customers who liked to linger in the early hours of daylight. Also, Thursday nights were one of the few times he got to relax after working shifts from morning to late afternoon.

“I know you two,” Baekhyun scowled at his friends, who were waiting in the doorway to his bedroom while he pushed one of his legs in a pair of old black jeans. “It’s never just one drink with you… I’ll end up wasted under one of the tables and then Y/N will have to carry me home.”

“For someone so eager to get dressed and walk out of the house, you’re complaining too much.” Sehun smirked as he nudged Chanyeol with his elbow.

“Don’t worry, it’s just one drink,” Chanyeol reassured him as Baekhyun was finally done getting dressed. “Besides, you literally live a couple of blocks from your job and neither of us has to drive. We’ll call a taxi.” There was a faint yet lingering smile of satisfaction on the taller man’s face. He wasn’t really a patient guy and his mind was still in a frenzy after coming up with a plan to get Baekhyun and his flatmate to go out on a date.

Baekhyun threw on a leather jacket and brushed back his bangs with his fingers, ready to step out of the apartment. He was about to lock the door after switching off the lights but then stopped as he thought about something for a brief moment. “Hang on, I forgot something.” He let his friends know as he hurried back inside and into the bathroom.

Once he was back and finally locked the door, both Chanyeol and Sehun got a whiff of something in the air. “Is that… Perfume?” They asked inquisitive.

Baekhyun furrowed his brows as he walked past them down the corridor. “And what about it? Y/N gifted it to me for my birthday.”

“This is going to be easier than I thought,” Chanyeol hummed as they headed towards your workplace at last.

The cafe turned into bar during evenings looked cozy in autumns and winters; some Halloween decorations lingered here and there although it was past October and halfway through into November, but the fake vine leaves painted red, yellow and orange warmed up the walls nicely. You liked the fall decorations, but you loved even more winter and Christmas decorations, although it was a hassle to take everything down and put new things up, it was still satisfying as the end result.

You spotted Baekhyun, Chanyeol and Sehun out of the corner of your eye as soon as they entered the bar thanks to the bell ringing on top of the door. “There you go, Lucas,” you placed a glass of cold beer on top of a napkin in front of one of your regular customers and looked around, quickly facing the three new friendly faces once you made sure that no one else needed your services. “Good evening guys!” You said cheerfully, a warm feeling spreading through your chest to see Baekhyun keeping his promise to come pick you up after work, even more so considering he was rather early for it.

“Ah, my favorite bartender!” Sehun mused as he leaned against the counter with a smirk on his expression. ”You look a bit overworked although there aren’t many customers.”

Baekhyun noticed it as well and looked behind the counter and around the familiar workplace. “Where’s Minseok? Weren’t you two supposed to work tonight’s shift together?”

You inhaled a long breath as you glanced down with busy eyes to grab a rag from a hidden surface on your workspace, then picked it up and cleaned the countertop in front of the three men. “I think he had something for dinner that upset his stomach to the point where he was nauseated.” You winced as you explained to them without much detail as you didn’t know how your coworker was doing after he left. “I told him to go home and rest just in case… But anyway,” you smiled once again. “What can I get you guys to drink?” You asked as you returned the rag in its previous spot and placed three napkins on the counter.

“For starters, I’d say shots of soju and then beers?” Chanyeol looked at his friends but Baekhyun shook his head when he heard the doorbell signal the arrival of more customers.

“I’ll help Y/N,” he said and promptly walked behind the counter to join you. He picked up one of the aprons matching yours from a hanger on the wall and put it on after he took off his jacket.

“Don’t worry Baek, it’s your night off,” you tried to persuade him to just enjoy the night with his friends but he just gave you his usual warm and reassuring smile that made your heart flutter with content.

“Nonsense,” he shrugged as he spun around to softly bump his shoulder into yours and looked into your eyes, “I’m happy to work with you.” You felt your cheeks heat up at his words and you could barely hide the smile that graced your lips once your coworker welcomed the new customers with a loud and cheerful tone.

Your reaction didn’t go unnoticed to the two friends sitting on the other side of the counter, across from you. Chanyeol nudged Sehun with his elbow and whispered to just play along, after he made sure that Baekhyun’s ears were out of reach for what he was about to say. You placed two shots of soju on the napkins and turned around to fill two glasses with beer. “So, Y/N,” you looked over your shoulder for a brief second at Chanyeol, “are you single?”

The question wasn’t new to your ears, especially after working as a bartender, but it still caught you off guard coming from him. “I did not expect you to ask me something like this, Mr. Park.” You confessed with a chuckle while walking back to take away the empty shot glasses and placed two glasses filled to the brim with foaming beer. “Why do you want to know?”

“Well, are you?” Sehun questioned with a raised eyebrow, carefully picking up the glass to take a sip from it while holding your suspicious gaze.

You let your shoulders slump with a sigh as you averted their eyes and, without meaning to, you looked in Baekhyun’s direction. “Yes, I’m single.” You nodded as your smile faltered, you looked around at the other customers while feeling a bit nervous.

“Perfect!” Chanyeol beamed as he clapped his hands once and leaned closer to the counter, you just eyed him with suspicion. “There’s this very nice guy, he’s a bit talkative and playful,” he began explaining but kept it quite mysterious, “A friend of ours, you know… I would like you do go on a blind date with him.”

“I’m sorry… What now?” You were taken aback by his sudden request that you didn’t know how else to react. It was a nice gesture, sure… but you already had feelings for someone else and weren’t sure if a blind date would be a good idea, not at the moment at least.

“I promise he’s a very friendly and good guy,” Sehun added, playing along to Chanyeol’s plan although they didn’t even talk about it beforehand. He licked his lips to get the residue of the beer foam and arched his brows at you. “Unless you like somebody else already.” Blood rushed to your face and you felt hot under your clothes, hesitant about answering your foot started bouncing nervously and you crossed your arms. Should you be honest and tell them or should you keep it for yourself? Well… “There is someone I like.” You confessed, but it just made you sad to say it so you continued before they could ask anything else about this crush of yours. “But I don’t think it’ll work out so I might as well go on a blind date with your friend.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Baekhyun’s curious voice made you slightly jolt on your feet and you flashed him a nervous smile. “Are you going on a date?” You tilted your head unsure of what to say since he was the one person you didn’t want to find out about this blind date, at least not like this… or ever. You thought you could maybe just go at the date and never call back Chanyeol and Sehun’s friend, but then another question popped in your head. Does Baekhyun know this friend of theirs? Would he mind? It’s not like he had feelings for you, so why were you so worried about it?

Thankfully, you heard the voice of one of your customers call for you and used it as an excuse to leave. “This is a discussion for another time, I gotta go back to work!” And just like that you were gone in an instant, meanwhile Baekhyun faced Chanyeol and Sehun with a half disappointed and half irritated expression.

“A blind date?!” He hissed under his breath.

They both nodded with pleased smirks. “She said yes, so you better make this work, otherwise you’re truly hopeless.” Chanyeol replied and finally let himself taste the beer that’s been sitting in front of him on the counter for a while.

Baekhyun’s anger dissipated immediately, his eyes widened in surprise and his mouth fell agape. “You set us up on a blind date?” He whispered while stealing glances in your direction. His heart rate began speeding up while he watched you smile politely at a couple who were paying for their drinks, getting ready to leave.

“Although…” Sehun inhaled a long breath as he looked down at his drink, his smile faded. Baekhyun’s attention was immediately on him, feeling his heart drop at the man’s words. “She did say she likes someone.” Chanyeol gave him a hard nudge with his elbow, eliciting a pained groan from the man sitting next to him. “What?! I’m just saying, she didn’t say who… Y/N thinks it’s not going to work out so you don’t have to worry.”

Baekhyun sighed and scratched his head, too many thoughts were running through his head in that moment and he didn’t know how to process the fact that there indeed was someone you liked… You’ve been friends for a few years and were roommates as well, so why did you not talk to him about this person you seem to like so much?

He became rather quiet that night and even the following days, he was practically sulking since he was stuck with the thought that the blind date was going to be a disaster. That didn’t stop Chanyeol from insisting on taking care of all the details about the date, he went as far as borrowing both yours and Baekhyun’s work schedules to set up a perfect timing for you to meet. You noticed immediately the change in his behavior, he wasn’t avoiding you, he would never do that, but he was acting too distant. You tried asking but didn’t push further because maybe he needed some time for himself, otherwise he would have opened up to you, at least you hoped.

It went on like that for a couple of days until you couldn’t take it anymore, you missed Baekhyun being his usual playful and loud self, he was the source of your serotonin and it affected your mood as well. It was the last few days of November, the shop was closed for the day due to the fact that you needed to take down the autumnal decorations and brighten up the place with Christmas ones.

“Baekhyun, we really need to talk.” You told him with a preoccupied tone, hoping he wouldn’t try and dodge the conversation as he had been doing for nearly half of November. He didn’t look at you from his high place on the ladder, instead, his pupils were fixed on his fingers unrolling the fairy lights and hanging them on the wall, supported by nails that had been stuck into the bricks for who knows how many years.

“Alright, alright,” he nodded and hummed for a moment, pausing his work to look down; your hands were securely holding onto the ladder for him and keeping it in place so he felt safe to be up there, occasionally passing him Christmas decorations from the boxes piled up next to your feet. “I’ll clean and decorate the bathrooms.”

You scoffed, incredulous that he actually managed to talk about anything else but his feelings. “I’m not talking about the bathroom, but since you said you’re going to do it, I won’t stop you.”

“Damn!” He chuckled with a shake of his head and went back to fixing the lights. “Okay, let’s talk, but I warn you, if this is about me—“

“It’s precisely about you! You’ve been avoiding my questions, I’m concerned about you. Something happened and you haven’t openly spoken to me ever since that night at the bar.” You interjected and heard him complain with a groan of your name, to which you let go of the ladder, making the man almost scream in fear.

“What are you doing—“ High pitched words reached your ears as you crossed your arms and just gazed up at him with arched brows, feeling so done with his behavior. He dropped the fairy lights without meaning to and wrapped his hands on both sides of the ladder, holding on for dear life. “No, no, no— Okay, fine! I’ll tell you, just please don’t let go of the ladder.” You held onto the ladder once more and watched him climb down until he was finally to your eye level. “There’s this girl I like, I’ve liked her for a while now actually.” Baekhyun let out a long, defeated sigh. “Turns out she likes some other person and I don’t know why I thought I could—“ He stopped himself from saying anything else as he ran one of his hand over his face, frustrated that he was confessing to you how he felt, except he was still hiding the actual truth. What a coward, he thought. He was convinced now more than ever that the blind date was truly a bad idea, he just didn’t know how to tell Chanyeol that he didn’t have the balls to go through with it and accept your rejection once you found out he was your secret date. “I like her a lot.” He added.

You felt you heart fasten at his words, it was drumming so hard that the pulse in your ears felt deafening… Baekhyun liked another girl, you repeated to yourself in your head. For a short moment and in a totally awkward silence you felt like an idiot; an idiot for feeling jealousy when he mentioned another girl, when you should’ve said something to comfort him. You were frowning, unable to move or say anything coherent until you forced yourself to say: “I’m sorry.” You bit your lip and looked down at your hands. “She’s an idiot.” You spit out with slight anger lacing your words.

“Why do you say so?” His tone softened when he noticed how upset you were over what he told you, he didn’t think you would care that much about a girl not liking him back… and the worst part was that you were that girl. “She’s allowed to like someone else, it’s just that I’m a coward and I didn’t tell her that I like her because I’m afraid of her rejecting me.” It felt so surreal that he was running his mouth like that, actually confessing the truth to you but you still had no idea.

Your head head snapped up towards him with your lips parted, ready to fight back his insecurities, except you didn’t realize what you were saying until it was already too late. “Well, she’s still dumb! Because what other girl wouldn’t like you? I like you!"

"You do?" He whispered almost breathless, too stunned to say anything else as soon as he processed your words; the corners of his lips curved up in a genuine and shy smile, yet you barely saw it since you looked down and bent you body forward to pick up a box with decorations and left him standing there. Your face was burning so hot with embarrassment it almost felt like you were going to combust. "Y/N, hang on, let’s talk it out—“ He tried to go after you, but you walked past the counter and entered the women’s bathroom, closing the door behind you. You dropped the box on the counter by the sink and looked at yourself in the mirror, cursing under your breath ad at yourself for being so careless with your words.

“Wait, hold on…” One of your friends, Hana, laughed at you on the phone for the second time that night, after you explained to her what happened at the coffee shop.

“I swear to God, Hana, there’s nothing to laugh about.” You mumbled, holding your phone against your ear with you shoulder; your hands were too busy going through the clothes in your wardrobe, searching for anything remotely cute and appropriate for a blind date.

“There actually is,” she continued laughing at your misery. “You confessed to Baekhyun that you actually like him, that’s a good thing isn’t it? I mean, he didn’t have a bad reaction, so where’s the problem, Y/N?” You groaned as you threw a pair of torn up jeans on the floor of your bedroom and took your phone in your hands.

“That’s the point, I chickened out!” You walked to the foot of the bed and let yourself fall on your back, bouncing on the mattress. “He tried to talk to me about it but I just couldn’t do it, so I locked myself in the bathroom. I’m the clown of the month!”

“Oh my God, Y/N, you’re unbelievable.” Hana’s laughter rung in your ear with disbelief for the situation you got yourself into, but soon quieted down to a serious tone. “Listen, you have to face him at some point. You can’t just avoid him forever.”

You sat up on the bed and thought about what she said, your eyes burning holes into the door leading to the living room of your shared apartment. Baekhyun wasn’t home yet, he was still setting up decorations at the bar with Minseok and going over December’s inventory. “What about this girl he said he likes?” A pout formed on your lips, like a child whining to their parent.

“You won’t know until you talk to him.” You sighed out loud and eyed the mess on your bedroom floor, clothes lying on top of each other as if your wardrobe got stormed by a hurricane. “Earth to Y/N, are you there? Promise you’ll talk to him?”

You snapped out of your daze and rubbed your eyes as you replied to her. “Yeah, sure, I’ll talk to him,” you replied in defeat. “But it’ll have to wait until after this stupid blind date. It’s tonight and I don’t even know what to wear…” You heard a noise come from the living room and gasped out loud, jiggling of keys made you jump on your feat and run towards the door until you pressed your side against it. “He’s here, I gotta go. Bye Hana!” You whispered with your heart drumming in your chest and said goodbye to your friend, before hanging up the call. “Baekhyun?” You carefully called out his name and waited impatiently for a reply.

His muffled voice came from the other side of the door, and as careful as you had been, he called out your name. “Are you okay? Can I come in?” He was right outside of your bedroom, your nerves were killing you and you didn’t know what to do, yet against your better judgement, you moved away from the door and opened it. You bit your tongue as you met Baekhyun’s reassuring smile, somehow eliciting a smile from your lips as well. Seeing as you had not replied to his questions, Baekhyun let his eyes look past you and onto the pile of clothing on the floor. “Getting ready for the blind date?”

You looked in the same direction his pupils did and chuckled with a slow nod. “Yeah, I just don’t know what to wear yet…”

“Don’t worry, you’ll look beautiful no matter what you choose to wear.” The sweetness of his words made you hyper aware of the way he was looking at you now, and you weren’t sure why it seemed… different.

“Thank you…” You almost stuttered. Your heart was ramming against your ribcage so hard you could have passed out from the lightheadedness it caused you, but you forced yourself to break the eye contact and walked further inside your bedroom. You picked up two dresses from the wardrobe, one filled with cute floral patterns and the other was a solid dark blue color. “Which one looks better for a fancy dinner?” You asked him, unsure whether it was a good idea but Baekhyun actually pointed at the dark blue dress with a cheerful smile. It was weird to say the least, he appeared to be more excited for your blind date than you were, and you didn’t even know who Chanyeol was trying to set you up with. “Okay, this dress it is then.”

“By the way, I need to go out in a bit.” Baekhyun caught you off guard and you just stared at him with slightly widened eyed. “Is there anything that you need before I leave?”

“Mmmh, no… No.” You show your head and flashed him a reassuring smile even though you were still nervous. “I’ll be fine.”

“Okay, see you later, Y/N.” He reached out for the handle and closed the door after himself.

As soon as you heard the lock click, you exhaled a long, shaky breath and dropped the dresses on the bed. “And there he goes…” You whispered, choosing to replace the deafening silence with some music from your phone.

Baekhyun stood in the hallways while holding onto his breath, ears listening to you shuffling around your bedroom before any other sound was drowned out by you favorite playlist. He had been dreading this blind date for so many days and now that it was happening — especially after he found out he was the person you liked and not some other guy — Baekhyun felt elated. He was ready to get dressed and run out of the door to get you flowers, unfortunately not your favorite ones because they were out of season, but he was still gonna get something pretty. He couldn’t stop thinking about how you were going to react once you met him at the restaurant as your date. Too much energy was coursing through his veins in that moment, he could barely contain himself.

Everything was perfect. Baekhyun had to remember to thank Chanyeol for taking care of the reservation, the restaurant was truly lovely and felt intimate, soft fairy lights were hanging from the red brick walls, adding to the romantic atmosphere of slightly dimmed lighting, a small candle was illuminating the table at which Baekhyun sat. A bouquet of pink and white chrysanthemums rested on his right side as he, on the other hand, couldn’t help but nervously fiddle with his fingers under the tablecloth. A shy smile graced his joyful expression while his eyes darted to the watch on his left wrist, growing restless as you were late to your date.

Baekhyun’s smile faltered when he felt his phone vibrating in the pocket of his elegant blazer, he shut his eyes tightly and prayed that it wasn’t Chanyeol the one calling him with bad news, saying you stood up on the blind date at the last possible moment. You wouldn’t do that, would you? “Hello?” He answered his phone still keeping his eyes shut, but they immediately shot open once he heard your voice greet him on the other side of the line. “Y/N? What’s wrong? Where are you? Shouldn’t you be at the date?” He showered you with questions to which you didn’t know what to answer.

“Uuh—“ You hesitated for a long moment, unsure of what to say. “I’m outside of the restaurant, I’ve been for the past 5 minutes. I don’t want to go inside and meet some guy that I don’t know.” He listened to you talk really fast, almost tripping on your words as your tone dripped with nervousness and regret. “I just don’t want to meet a new guy and I’m so sorry to Chanyeol, cause I said I would do this—”

“Hey, hey, calm down,” He tried to help you calm down over the phone, resisting the urge to just stand up from the table and run to meet you outside. “Everything’s gonna be alright, okay? Do you trust me?”

Baekhyun listened to you on the other side of the line as you tried to get through your panicked state, quietly repeating short and reassuring “okays”. You released a deep breath and finally replied to him. “I trust you. Will you come pick me up, please?”

He almost chuckled at the softness of your voice, instead a warm smile returned on his face as he told you what to do. “I will, but first I need you to walk into the restaurant, it’s cold outside and you’re wearing a dress.” You agreed to do it and his eyes quickly moved towards the door, as he was sat on the opposite side of the restaurant.

Baekhyun watched as the door opened and you stepped inside, brows furrowed with worry yet you still managed to look effortlessly beautiful; long black coat shielding your body from the cold of the last weeks of autumn. He could see the dark blue of your knee length dress peeking under the coat, a small purse swaying by your side from a long chain on your left shoulder as you glanced around and were greeted by a waiter. “I’m in.” You mumbled as your eyes looked frantically around.

“Look to your right, other side of the room.” And you did, you looked towards him and nearly dropped your phone, your jaw went numb for a moment as your lips parted in disbelief. One of the waiters helped you remove your coat and accompanied you towards Baekhyun, to your table. “You’re beautiful,” the words rolled off his tongue almost like a foreign sound, he couldn’t believe that you two were actually on a date, even if he had to keep it a secret for such a long time.

You were at a loss for words, yet your chest was flooded with immense happiness. “The girl you like a lot…” You began saying and he nodded before you could finish your sentence. “A very nice guy, a bit talkative and playful,” you giggled as you quoted Chanyeol’s words when he spoke about the friend he wanted you to meet.

“Yep, that would be me.” Baekhyun picked up the flowers and slowly stepped closer to you. “I know they’re not daffodils, but I hope you like chrysanthemums too.”

“You know what I like more than flowers?” You stepped even closer to him until you could feel his hot breath on your skin, completely forgetting the rest of the world as you felt a rush of bravery while gazing into his eyes. “You.”

When Baekhyun leaned forward to steal a kiss it felt like the most natural thing in the world, as if he had done it so many times before and you were out tonight celebrating an anniversary rather than a first date. The gentlest of touches left a lingering sensation of his lips on yours. The red of your lipstick transferred slightly on his lips and if you focused hard enough, you could see that his cheeks turned the same shade out of shyness and adoration.

“Hmm, what do you think?” You asked, tilting your head to the side while staring very hard at the Christmas tree.

You were currently in your new apartment with Baekhyun standing by your side, eyes focused ahead of you. “It’s crooked on one side.” The living room was bare of furniture except for a coffee table, the tv stand with the television on top of it and the Christmas tree you spent at least three hours on decorating with your boyfriend. Moving boxes were scattered all around the place.

“I think if we spin it around towards the corner of the room none of the guests will notice.” You suggested and Baekhyun hoped quickly towards the tree, being careful to avoid any boxes and discarded ornaments still lying on the floor. He crouched on his kneed and wrapped his fingers around the base of the fake pine tree, rotating the crooked side towards the corner of the room.

“What about now?” He asked as he looked up at the tree for a moment and back at you.

“Light it up.” Baekhyun took the end of a cable beneath the branches of the tree and struggled to plug it into the wall for a moment, making you giggle, but as soon as the tree was lit up, he stood up and walked back to stand by you. “Now it’s perfect!” You beamed while he wrapped one of his arms around your shoulders and brought you closer to kiss your cheek.

“Merry Christmas, baby,” Baekhyun whispered in your ear, your smile became bigger and brighter when you looked into his loving eyes.

You pecked his lips with a soft kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck. “Merry Christmas to you too, Baek—”

You didn’t even have time to finish saying his name because all of a sudden he snaked his arms around your waist, making you screech in surprise when he tried to lift you up from the floor and yelled at the top of his lungs: “To the bedroom, now!”

Loud giggles escaped you as you struggled to stay serious, but it was impossible when he was in a playful mood like this. “But we don’t have a bed frame yet—“

“We have a mattress and that’s enough for me!”

[aching-tummies]

I really appreciate your writing and your writing skills are really commendable. I, yet again, have an ask for you: Have you experiences where you had a friend or a partner or maybe some acquaintance rubbed your stomach for you and instead of helping you, they made the ache worse? And you couldn't even refuse because you're just too shy to tell them so you just sat there moaning and whimpering.

P.S.- Are you still open to take RP-Ask ideas?

Thank you!

I have never had the pleasure of someone else rubbing my stomach in real life. I'm much to shy/reserved/embarrassed to ever even mention it to anyone when my stomach is bothering me. A lot of what is talked about on this blog is totally wishful thinking. If only I had someone to rub my stomach in real life...but that kind of thing is blocked by feelings of awkwardness and embarrassment. That's why I came up with the RP-Asks and why I post the way I do: since I can't have them in real life I want to invite people to write it for me so that I can live vicariously through staring at words and hallucinating.

RP-Asks are always welcome. Whether or not they get posted depends on a few things though. 1) Tumblr often eats my asks and I never receive them. 2) If the asks include stuff that I'd really rather not post to my blog or something I'm not comfortable with or don't know how to respond to it'll likely be deleted or answered privately to explain why if the person is off anon. 3) Sometimes I get something really awesome and it sits in my askbox because I just can't seem to craft a response worthy of it to post it to. Someone is kind enough to send me a masterpiece and I want to do it justice...and it ends up sitting in my inbox with a response that keeps on going through edits.

[vexillumalbum]

Hi, I would like to ask you since your askbox is open what are your favorite characters in games you play? or maybe you could rank all the characters? thanks in advance, take care :)

Hello, Anon! Of course, I’ll gladly do that! I actually play a lot of otome games (or games like MLQC since I don’t know if it classifies as otome) so I’ll only do it for IkeVamp, IkeSen, MLQC and MysMe since these games are the closest to my heart. 

I tried to keep it spoiler free and I think I succeeded but please be aware that I’m talking about the games mentioned above so there might be some tiny spoilers.

Also, be prepared for a long post.

Let’s start with MLQC:

1) Obviously Gavin - he’s the love of my virtual life, I adore him so much sometimes I catch myself staring at his karmas for a good few minutes. I know he has some flaws, but in this house we stan Gavin despite them. Overall Birdcop Agent B-7 10000/10

2) Victor - partially because my boyfriend is very similar to him and that just makes me have a soft spot for him and partially because I love men in power (yes, I have issues, I'm aware of that). I’d say 8.5/10

3) Shaw - he’s okay, I have not enough info about him to really place him anywhere but some fanfictions made me feel some things for this man. So we can say I love him on Tumblr, not in game (yet, maybe it’ll change in future chapters). 6/10

4) Kiro - okay, hear me out, I don’t like men like him. I prefer dark types over these bubbly personalities. Since this is spoiler free I won’t talk about him more but if you want to know my thoughts on him, let me know. Maybe 5/10

5) Lucien - I’m sorry, Lucien stans. It’s not that I dislike him or something, I just don’t have a good connection with him. And his voice in eng dub is really creepy for me, I can’t handle his phonecalls. Oh but his dates are amazing, I’ve read 4 so far but I loved them all. 4/10

Okay now IkeVamp. Here I’ll rank them in a different ways: routes I played (they will have explained a bit about character) and routes I haven’t played since they are not available in English version (there'll just be names) (please know I haven't played Isaac’s route too since I haven’t had time to fully dedicate myself to it since it came out):

1) Comte

2) Arthur - my husbando 2.0, I love him, his character is my go-to in otome games. Again, I am aware of his flaws but I love him regardless. Thank you very much. 10/10

3) Theo

4) Leonardo - he reminds me a lot of one of my brothers so I see him more as a friend than love interest but I like him regardless and Think his route deserved some better drama(but that just my opinion). 8.5/10

5) Mozart - I loved his route, truly, and I like him a lot, just something about him seems off to me, I don’t know... 7.5/10

6) Napoleon - he’s okay, nothing too much, nothing too little. A good boyfriend, calls me nunuche (so like dummy). Overall 7/10

7) Vincent - I really struggled through his route, but he seems to love MC so much. Ugh, he reminds me a bit of Kiro, so 6/10.

8) Dazai

9) Issac

10) Jean

11) Sebastian

12) Shakespeare

Time for IkeSen, here I will only do Oda forces and Uesugi-Takeda forces (without Kennyo, Ranmaru, Motonari and the others, sorry):

1) Nobunaga - again, men in power, ekhem. But really I just love how his relationship with MC blossoms through his route and his dramatic route is awesome for me. 10/10

2) Hideyoshi - mamabear, I get him, he’s like a male version of me so I sympathize a lot with him. I feel like he would give great hugs. 9.5/10

3) Shingen - I actually don’t know why I like him so much. Maybe because he’s somewhat similar to Arthur from IkeVamp or maybe his dramatic route made me so emotional I cried for a few day straight. I don’t know. I’d give him 8.5/10

4) Mitsuhide - we all know he, we all love him. I was a bit disappointed by his route but overall a good experience. He would do everything for MC I think so I'd give him 8.5/10

5) Masamune - he was my first route in IkeSen so I’m a bit sentimental when it comes to him. Also, he has a sexy eyepatch, come on. 8/10

6) Sasuke - in every route he was there for me so of course I like him a lot. Sometimes his jokes were weird but hey, we all love weirdos here, right? 7/10

7) Ieyasu - sometimes I don’t know what to think about him. Playing his route was a challenge for me but in the end I found I liked it. Just not a lot. 6/10

8) Kenshin - I get why people like him, I just don't so much. He’s okay, his story was okay, a little bit... too much for me. I’d say 5/10

9) Yukimura - meeeh, he calls me boar woman so it’s an instant no from me, sir. But sometimes he’s funny. 4/10

10) Mitsunari - he’s soooo sweet but also soooo much not for me. 3/10

And now MysMe, please don’t bash on me for this, I’ve only played for a couple of months with breaks so I’m not an expert yet:

1) Jumin - I TOLD YOU MEN IN POWER, he’s actually very sweet and caring, he makes me feel really loved all the time and he’s also intelligent and can make pancakes (my boyfriend can't even boil eggs even though he’s been trying to do them properly since March so please let me fangirl over someone who can do pancakes). He’s my husbando 3.0. 10/10

2) V - at first I liked him a lot, then I didn’t like him, then I liked him even more. Now he’s my second place because I really sympathize with him and I think he deserve a chance to get a normal loving life. Also he’s super caring and attentive so point for him. 9/10

3) Ray - his route is a rollercoaster but it’s worth it I think. There’s so much I want to tell about him but I don't want to spoiler anything so I’ll just say he’s my precious baby. 8.5/10

4) Zen - his route was boring for me but his character made up for it I think. He’s also caring and I like his good ending so much (I don’t know why). Overall 7.5/10

5) Seven - I have a bit of love-hate relationship with him. He’s okay, but I expected so much more from his route. I see him as a very good boyfriend, just not for me. 6.5/10

6) Jaehee - It’s not that I don't like her, but it's also not that I like her. You know, she’s just there. Her route was very plain and in Jumin’s route she played on my nerves a bit. 5/10

7) Yoosung - I’m sorry but I really don’t like him. I see him as a child and only thing I like was his DLC. 3/10

8) Rika - I hate her. I understand her but I still hate her. 0/10 Thank you very much

Thank you for reading this whole thing, I know it was long, I’m sorry. If you would like to ask me more about certain characters please send me an ask! Love you all!

[talistheintrovert]

Deleting my fic

Hi everyone! I just posted an explanation in my Salem Fic about why I will be taking it down in the next few days. If you like, you can go look at it HERE or you can read it under the cut, but I felt the need to explain. 

I'm posting this to let everybody know that I am taking this fic down. I will leave it up for another day or two, and then it is permanently coming down as I have no desire to associate myself with this fic or its origins anymore.

I initially received a single anon comment on this fic when I posted it way back over a year ago:

ANON: Hi if you are going to borrow ideas for fics from other people, even if it’s out there on tumblr, you should at least credit them for the original idea.

and I responded the way I thought I should at the time:

hi, i'm gonna be honest - I forgot where this idea had even come from until you brought it up.

At the time i was planning to do this idea, i considered myself friends, or at least close acquaintances with the person who threw it out there, and offered to write it. Then I became very busy and decided to abandon the idea.

Then, after a bunch of things happened, I stopped talking to that person, and I'm fairly certain they wouldn't even want to see the fic or the credit, despite the idea no longer having anything to do with them.

When I found the idea again, all I had was a word document with a bunch of plot points and ideas written down, and was suddenly struck with the inspiration to write it again.

Because I had honestly forgotten to credit the person involved I will be sure to do that when I update it.

However, i do not appreciate you coming on anon to accuse me like this. I would never intentionally fuck someone else over, not EVER, and I resent the implication that I would. I will, however, be sure to credit Alex, because despite me no longer being friends with her, and the fact that we don't really talk anymore, I respect her enough as a human being not to let her think I'm treating her with disrespect.

Thanks for the anon.

I then reached out to Alex to clarify with her that I had not - nor would I EVER - intentionally steal the idea, and that I was going to clarify that on the fic itself, and she agreed, and we discussed the dissolution of our friendship and then didn't speak again. I went ahead and linked the post with her initial idea in it, which also has our interaction where I offered to write it.  

The circumstances surrounding the whole situation were unfortunate - I perceived her support of a certain fic as potentially harmful, and sent her One Single Anonymous Ask about it. I was relatively polite (although I do understand that anything on Anon can be perceived as impolite) and I asked her specifically because there was a rift growing among halves of the fandom and Alex had always been the person I knew to be the most level-headed and I figured if she could explain why she was right and I was wrong then I would apologise and leave it alone. Unfortunately, as with everything in fandom, it blew up.

I was not the only person who had taken issue with this fic, or the attitude that accompanied it, and MANY people - some that I knew, but most that I didn't - started to also send in asks, and a lot of them were a lot more accusatory, and I'm sure some of them were trolls deliberately designed to rile up the drama even further. Alex has since expressed to me that this all blew up around the time she was having a hard time, and I apologised to her as it was NEVER my intention to launch some kind of attack on her, or anyone. I explained that the reason I went on anon was because at the time, the issue of the fic was so personal to me and I wasn't ready to talk about it with anyone I was friends with online at a limited capacity, because it was part of my life. Just as Alex's own troubles at the time were unbeknownst to me.

I have since opened up about my personal experiences with some internet friends, and in the last two years have grown and learned how to move on with my life, but at that point, the pain was very raw and I didn't want to expose myself to that kind of drama where I would be forced to relive the trauma over and over again.

As it turned out, it didn't matter.

People decided that because I was posting about these issues (without necessarily explicitly bringing up my personal experiences), that not only did I send that one ask to Alex, but that I was responsible for MULTIPLE asks, that I had organised some kind of coordinated attack, that the entire rift was my fault and that I'd done it maliciously. And I spent MONTHS getting vicious, nasty, hateful anons that didn't even all address the issues they supposedly had with me, just told me I was a waste of space, that I didn’t belong, that I shouldn’t exist. I am sure Alex received her own number of those too, and I am truly sorry for that because no-one deserves to go through anything like that.

After Alex and I talked for the last time, I thought we had moved on. I unfollowed her and a number of other creators not because I had anything against them personally but because I realised this was an issue we were never going to agree on, and rather than stoke the flames I chose to step back from them entirely, so that I no longer had to see the content I was uncomfortable with. I respect her as a person, and as a content creator, and regardless of whether I am an avid follower of her anymore, I still support her ability to create and speak freely. I have never blocked her, nor have I ever sent any kind of anon/non-anon hate to her, and I have never, NEVER plagiarised, from her or anyone else.

And yet.

Close friends of mine within the fandom, friends that I don't even consider just fandom friends anymore - friends that I would live, breathe and die for, friends who I love more than anything in the world - have been periodically, over the last six or so months, receiving various anons claiming to be someone who has "had too much to drink" and telling them that I am a bad person, that it's "well known within the fandom" that I'm a plagiarist, and that it is "tiring to see such hypocrisy" when they preach about original content and then remain friends with me.

TO BE CLEAR: I don't think that Alex would do this.

So before anyone gets it twisted, this isn't some kind of EXPOSE where I drag someone's dirty laundry into the open, because I am absolutely not that kind of person, and the one time I waded into fandom drama, it caused this mess, and it ended my friendship with someone who had basically been the cause of me getting into this fandom in the first place. So no, I am not accusing Alex, or any of her friends, of sending these anons.

I understand if they dislike me because of what transpired over a year ago, and I have my own regrets about the entire situation, and I have no desire to bring it all back up again. I'm not doing this to get anyone to go after them or anyone else, because I don't think it's anyone's fault except the anon people in my friends' askboxes. My friends have never publicly addressed the asks, except for a single post this afternoon where Abby told the person to stop, and didn't even answer the ask or explicitly talk about what was said in it.

I don't mind if you hate me. Whether you dislike me on your own time or you do it in my askbox; I've gotten pretty used to anon hate, and I genuinely don't mind people throwing some my way - this is the internet. But when you're going out of your way to harass my friends, I cannot just ignore it.

That's my family you're talking to.

Whoever this anon person/anon people are, you are deliberately taking your personal opinion of me, and you are walking up to my family and telling them that I am not worth their time. You are telling them that I am a plagiarist, despite the SINGLE instance of "plagiarism" (this fic) being an honest mistake, and one that I immediately reconciled once I realised. This fic that I haven't updated since, because I wasn't sure when it would be acceptable for me to do so without upsetting Alex further, and have now decided to delete. I considered deleting it quietly, without explanation, as I did another one of my fics earlier this year (simply because it was a WIP that I was never planning on finishing) but I realised that deleting this fic without an explanation could potentially give this anon person/people more fuel to come after me with, and I really just want this whole drama to be over. It's been a year, and I have no desire to start the debate again, nor do I wish any ill will towards anyone, especially Alex, and I do not want to cause undue drama later down the line when this anon person/people returns to my friends askboxes to accuse them of helping me "hide the truth" or some other bullshit that has nothing to do with them or anyone else.

I'm putting this out in the open to make myself very clear: I am not a plagiarist. And if you have any assumptions that you feel the need to jump on anon to yell, it should be coming to me, not to my family.

This fandom was the first real fandom experience I had on tumblr. I have been involved in fandom culture for years, but always from afar, and it was because of Alex's fics that I found my way into this place, that I met the people I now call my family, and that I rediscovered my own confidence in my writing, confidence that had been lacking for some time due to my personal life. I will always be grateful to her for that.

My writing is my writing. It is deeply personal to me, as it is to every writer, and as someone who plans to have a career in writing, it is incredibly important to me that my work is my own. I would never intentionally steal (or as that anon commenter put "borrow") anything from anybody, and the implication that I would is truly hurtful, especially when it seems to come from a place of exclusively hate, with no actual understanding of the situation. A troll.

I would like to repeat myself: I DO NOT THINK THIS IS ALEX'S PROBLEM and anyone who jumps in her asks to talk about it is not really doing it for the "truth" or for anything other than their own desire to stir up drama. I will be sending the link to this chapter to her myself, because I do not wish for this to be something she stumbles across and assumes I am trying to pin the blame on her for something I categorically do not think she would ever do.

I just want to move on, and I want my friends to be left out of whatever vendetta this anon person/people have.

I am certain I will make more mistakes as I go forward, because that is the nature of growth, but I would like to believe that I have never done anything, especially any of this, as a desire to be malicious or to hurt anyone, even those people who I fundamentally disagree with and do not interact with anymore. I'm not remotely begging for sympathy in this situation - I don't need it, I am confident enough in myself to know that I would not intentionally hurt anyone - I am simply asking for my friends, my family, to be left out of whatever this bullshit is.

I'm sorry if you were expecting a chapter, and I'm sorry this was so long, but I wanted to be clear about where I stand right now.

The 100 is coming to an end soon, and soon all we will have of this show and this fandom is memories, tumblr content, and friendships, and I do not want to spend any more of the limited time we have while this show is still on the air, spreading negativity or letting it be spread. This isn't to start drama, this is to end it.

[parkeraul]

hunger – grease!shawn

a/n: anon suggested me grease!shawn on my askbox and as an obsessed person that i am for the 60′s, here i am trying this one little thing. depending on the feedbacks, this might turn into a series. let me know if you like it. pairing: shawn x reader.  words: 1,594 warning: hints of badboy!shawn and badgirl!reader ahead. boldness is going to be well appreciated in here, my dudes. 

One by one, all of the guys were climbing the bleachers to chill after an intense class. A couple of them quickly grabbing cigarettes, enjoying the opportunity as they couldn’t find that familiar figure of the inspector trailing her way all around the schoolyard looking for people to chastise.  Matt appeared right after, bringing soda drinks to everyone and throwing the cans to his friends and Connor followed, fixing his denim jacket as soon as he made his way to the top.  “Where did you get this?” Brian asked, frowning.  “Uhm... my mom got me this.” He could feel the judgemental stare of the boys nearly turning his body into flames as he checked his own outfit. “Had to drop my leather jacket for laundry...” He tried to justify, tilting his head down in shyness.  “Oh!” Ian aggressively held him by the shoulder and wiggled his limbs after whining. “Is momma’s little boy going to show up in diapers tomorrow too?”  “Shut up!” Connor’s arms tried to push Ian away. “This is trending right now, okay?”  “This is pretty much why the both of you haven’t had sex in 3 months.” Shawn’s raspy voice called them out, teasing them and smirking right after. He pointed his chin to a couple of girls looking up at them and grimacing after walking away.  Everybody in that school knew them. Guys would die to be a part of the crew and girls were always daydreaming about them during classes. Even though they used to give the teachers a hard time, they all had a special place in their hearts as well at the end of the day. And it could be shown by the way the gym teacher complimented their performances in a discreet mode or by the way the biology teacher tried hard to hold back a laugh everytime they joked during a test.  People could either eat them up... or hate the group to death. There was no place in between.  The ones who hated had to hate in silence so they wouldn’t get a taste of Brian’s stupid jokes or Ian’s threatens.  “Why is your girlfriend taking so long?” Shawn spoke in a firm tone, bringing Brian back to reality. “Test happens next class and she’s still not here with her fuckin’ notes.”  "Isn’t she down in there running like a dork?” Matt asked and everyone looked down.  She was hanging out with her old friends Lisa and Claire but holding hands with someone... new.  Lisa seemed to feel annoyed by the situation, so she saved herself from being a part of the party by holding her hands behind her back. Claire and Wendy were carrying the new girl around the school with rushed steps as they talked to her excitedly. Apparently, they were showing her all the spots and places inside the school before french class.  The girl couldn’t help being dragged by the two other loud girls and the grouchy one following behind with eyes constantly rolling. Everybody burning her silhouette with hungry and curious eyes as the skirt of her beautiful dress kept on swaying helplessly because, when her legs weren’t tiptoeing fast across the schoolyard, the wind used to show up a little bit rougher just to collapse against the fabric so it could draw the air with the pretty little patterns of her cloth.  They were all smiles and laughs, curiously studying her eyeliner, the style of her hair, the colour on her lips and the new girl pretended to listen whatever they were talking about as her eyes decided to get lost up in there by the bleachers.  “Who are they?” Capturing at least 5 different pairs of eyes inspecting her, she whispered softly to the girls without breaking eye-contact.  “Shawn Mendes’ stupid gang.” Lisa finally decided to speak, still keeping distance.  “Stupid, huh?” She could barely blink now, trying to confirm the ‘stupid’ concept by finding any typical boyish action.  “They’re not stupid...” Wendy said, toying with her dress to avoid looking Lisa in the eyes.  “You say this because your boyfriend is a part of the clownery.” Lisa calls her out once again, giving the boys a disgusting look and they all look away, except for the curly-haired one.  They start arguing and she seizes the moment to put up an internal challenge of who would dare to look away first?  No need to say that he had the same thing in mind.  “Mendes!” Matt called and he just mumbled a quick ‘Hm?’ “Clean up your chin, man.”  Worried, Shawn raises an eyebrow and has to give up on glancing at the pretty girl surrounded by Wendy’s friends.  “Why?” His hand makes the way up to touch his skin and everyone starts to laugh.  “You’re drooling all over the outsider!” Connor shouted and quickly covered his mouth when he saw Shawn’s fingers making a fist.  “Someone’s getting over Ashley!” Ian teases and the guys are now gathering around to make fun of him while they could.  Because Shawn had been always wearing this serious look on his face and acting like a leader so he would never be seen as the foolish member of the squad – and then nobody would ever try to confront him. And the boys learned to treat him like this after finding out that he wasn’t quite the polite guy when people stepped on his damn nerves.  Lots of hands shaking his body relentlessly and he kept the flat look on his expression, breathing deeply and bringing two fingers between his rosy lips, whistling loud and making the boys step back, fixing all of the jackets and hairs as they kept on joking silently.  Wendy catches Shawn’s eyeballs peeking her and he opens his arms in complain, quietly waiting for her to get the hint of his impatience kicking in.  Wendy finds the stairs and goes upwards, promptly taking a small paper from one of her pockets and giving it to Shawn. When he’s about to grab it, she pulls back.  “Three magic words?” Wendy asks, lips slightly apart as her hand goes to the back of her earshell, waiting for the answer.  “Gimme this shit.” His thick arm stretches towards her, palm open to receive the note as he speaks through gritted teeth.  “Wrong answer, mister.” Wendy turns to steal a quick peck from Brian’s lips and hides the paper filled with the answers to the french test inside the pocket of his black shirt. “Pass it on if he behaves.”  Lisa, Claire and Y/N are down in there near the trees. Lisa checks on her nails and Claire tells the new girl about how lovely Connor is and how she thinks that the rest of the group is about to ruin his innocence. Clearly a crush. And she’s not the only one with a crush.  Wendy has to stop in the middle of her way downstairs.  “Who’s that girl?” Shawn’s tone asks her rigidly.  “What girl?” Wendy plays the fool.  “Don’t fuckin’ make me ask you twice.” He throws and Brian is about to affront. Shawn notices and acts ‘cool’ to avoid fighting his best friend, still keeping his unmistakable attitude. “That one in the pink dress!” He points harshly and then lets his palm smack down against his thigh covered by the tight jeans, trying to vanish away the stress somehow.  Down by the trees, the conversation goes the same way.  “Who’s the curly boy?” She asks and Claire is quick to answer, just like when you ask someone about The Beatles: they could tell you all the details from head to toe by heart.  “Shawn Mendes, the one and only.”  “Her name is Y/N. But you don’t wanna get out with her.” Wendy says.  “But you don’t wanna get out with him.” Claire unconsciously imitates.  “Why not?”  “Her brother is a senior! He’s always bookin’ inside this amazing Camaro and he picks her up after the last classes everyday. You don’t wanna piss him off, believe me. He’s super duper jealous!” Wendy explains.  “He’s a piece of shit.” Lisa gets in the middle and warns. “He broke up with Ashley last summer and I had never seen anyone cry that much after vacation.”  “And no one could ever date him. He’s out of everyone’s leagues.” Claire vents, exhaling deeply. “Lucky ones who ever got their chance to place a kiss right onto his beautiful lips...”  “EW! Seriously, stop that or I’m going to throw up right here right now.” Lisa interrupts and she’s back at glancing him one more time.  As his greenish eyes move to catch hers, she can listen something about how unreal his skills were when things came to music and he could hear how she easily learned 4 languages during her whole life.  “She’s a fox!” Matt slips out... “He’s a hunk!” And Claire copies the context again.  “But you better watch out, ‘cause he’s a badass.” Lisa finishes.  “Go slow, she’s a badass.” Wendy gives her final information.  “Maybe we should see about that.” Both Y/N and Shawn are letting these words fly away from their lips in response and the inspector shows up to call everyone’s attention to head back to their classes. The guys were putting the cigarettes down, the girls were rearranging their skirts and people started walking back to the building.  Classroom filled with nervous students as the teacher walks in.  “Bonjour.” The teacher spoke flatly.  “Bonjour, professeure!” Y/N answers, catching her by surprise.  Well, not only her.  Maybe someone’s not going to need notes in a paper anymore. 

[kourtwrites]

Why would you do all of those mean things to people?

Hi anon,

Okay so I get wanting to know the why for a lot of these actions. I’ll be honest a lot of it is immaturity/being unmedicated. I’m not using either as an excuse I’m just trying to give you a why to some of my actions. I’ve never been saintly, I haven’t. I certainly could have been nicer in my past, but unfortunately I can’t change the past. I wish I could. I’ve lost friendships I’ve had for years and there’s some that I’ll never get back and it does break my heart.

I know people have talked about being pushy with shipping, which honestly I didn’t even realize I did? So that’s a lot of self reflection there. I constantly tried to check in, because I want to make sure I’m not pushy, but I also in the other hand know I send inspo and headcanons. None of it is ever meant to push anyone and I’m really sorry that it’s felt like that. I’ve been forced into so many ships that I never want to do that, which is why I always try to tell anyone they can bow out. I promise I will never be mad if anyone is not feeling a ship. I really am sorry if anyone feels like I’ve pushed them into a ship with me, because I’ve been there and it feels like shit. It’s not okay, going forward I’m going to take a look at myself and how I interact with others when it comes to shipping because clearly I’m doing something wrong here and I don’t want the issues to continue.

I know you want a better answer than this, but every situation has been different. I’m not sure who is sending what anons. Plus I’ll be honest when I say that I’m sure some people I didn’t even know I was being mean to. Is that okay? No, it’s not. I know I have a super strong and intense personality, which is great sometimes, but I know it can be really off putting and things I say can be taken wrong. I’ve actively been trying to watch how I come off when I say things, because a lot of times it’s not meant with ill will, it’s really not.

So to some this all up cause I know it’s long, I’m not sure who is sending anons here anon. I wish I could tell you this or that is the exact reason why I was mean or hurtful, but I don’t know. If any of them want to come off anon and address things with me I would love them too. I won’t be mad in the least and if there is a reason, it’s not just a miscommunication or I came off too strong, I’ll explain. I’m always open to tell a person why I did something (if I remember the why). Even though it may not be right and I’m sorry for all of it, because at the time it was probably justified to me, it doesn’t mean it is actually right! Either way if there is a why, or isn’t even a reason and I was just flat out mean, I do want to apologize to these people I have hurt.

I get why people might be hesitant reaching out to me, but I’m not here to shame or blame, this is on me. I’m not going to try and say someone isn’t valid in how they feel, they are and I respect that 100%. My askbox, IM, discord, and character accounts are always open. Feel free to message me if you want, because I really do want to apologize.

Once again I’m so sorry to all those I have hurt.

— Kourtney

[ajaegerpilot]

ok here's my ~good faith~ coming off anon, it would b nice if u privately replied (also idk how tumblr messenger works) im honestly open to hearing your side (idk if thats patronizing to say but i dont think either of us will ultimately change our opinions?). idk youll prob just dismiss me anyway :')

I literally told you my opinions, I’m not hiding ‘my side’. And no, I’m not hiding this either. I actually noticed you before this, you’re the one that got mad @ me for saying I included him because he ‘~served~ in the Iraq war’. I shouldn’t have to explain to you that of all these men, while Adam Driver’s gives me the least amount of creeps he is without a doubt the most honest about the type of person he is, and why that is the type of person I could not respect or trust (please leave the people involved with the link alone!).

You’re bringing all of your own backstory with how people interact with him against me and that’s not fair. I’ve never called him ugly, I don’t really think people are ugly unless they do ugly things, but he’s done nothing to ‘earn my love’. You can love him all you want, I don’t care, I don’t know you. But once you come into my askbox, time and time again, bugging me for answers as though I’ve hidden something and, even now, acting like a victim, you make yourself my problem. You can love him if that’s what works for you, but he is not entitled to my love and care. You are not entitled to my emotions, my thoughts.

There is nothing wrong with having a ‘weird’ face. Most humans have weird faces. Weird faces make the world interesting, beautiful. In my opinion, more women should be able to get away with weird faces. But looking around that’s not the case in Hollywood. I also think people of colour often have features which are considered weird/’ugly’ by most people in the culture I live because of racism and white supremacy. I also think Adam Driver doesn’t have to worry about any of those things, and he can still make millions. 

I think that’s where a lot of people calling him ‘ugly’ comes into play, because they know that Daisy Ridley would not have been cast if she’d had a ‘weird’ face, they know that John Boyega’s looks (namely that he’s Black) prompted a huge backlash. They know that in the fandom people care far more about Adam Driver’s character than John or Daisy’s. Perhaps that frustration is inappropriate, and yeah it’s rude. But it’s wrong for anyone to divorce it from the context from which it arises. It’s equally wrong to pretend that he ‘deserves more love’ considering that the character in your icon is one of the most popular characters on fanfiction websites, for example (more popular than the main character Rey and much more popular than Finn) despite being a mass-murdering Nazi allegory.

To step back a moment, since you were so personally offended because of why I mostly included him on this shitpost, I think it’s time for me to say that I think there’s something fundamentally wrong with someone’s heart if they look to a war as an opportunity to ‘prove their manhood’, to ‘get even’ with people who had nothing to do with a tragedy that rocked their country. Adam Driver’s eyes don’t give me the creeps the way the other guys in my shitpost do but knowing this about him I know that there is something wrong.

I think Adam Driver did a very ugly thing. Considering your outlook on a character which murders countless people for power, I get the feeling that you wouldn’t find it ugly. And if you don’t, that’s the point where we fundamentally disagree. That all said, here’s the part where you can jump in and prove to me that he truly is a ‘sweet guy.’

or idk. you’ll prob just dismiss me anyway.

[toycarousel]

Wren I need some advice.. My best friend (and ex-boyfriend) just abandoned me, and called me hopeless. I feel bad, but I just wish there was something I could trade to get him back. Honestly I don't entirely believe I'm hopeless compared to who I was last year when the incident happened. It's not my fault I have anger issues, ya know? God I sometimes want to drown out everything with alcohol but I don't want the aftermath of it. Lately since that happened I've felt bad and I hope for your help

Hi, Anon! To start off with, you’re not hopeless.  I don’t believe that having made mistakes makes a person hopeless.  And considering you’ve made strides since the incident you’ve alluded to here, you’re clearly growing as a person, which is extremely significant, and you have every right to be proud of that!!!

I completely understand what wanting to drown sadness and anger out with alcohol, and it’s something I did end up doing, and I’m still paying for the aftermath of that now, so I, myself, think that you’re doing an excellent job by refraining from that -- I know how hard it is.  And anger is a very, very difficult emotion to have to constantly cope with.

Anger wears people down.  It’s exhausting, it’s upsetting, it can alienate the people we care about from us, it’s incredibly physically and emotionally uncomfortable, and it’s not at all easy to work through -- but that doesn’t mean it can’t be worked through.  Anger doesn’t excuse all of a person’s actions, but it does give you an idea of what sorts of things upset you, and where the anger might be stemming from.  That makes it very treatable, and while I know it’s a painful, gradual, arduous journey to become the person you want to be, it’s always possible and I know that you can do it -- mistakes and setbacks happen, but that’s all they are.  They don’t mean that you can’t change, and that you can’t recover and start to experience life in a way that’s fulfilling for you!

Some people don’t have the capacity to stick by the people they’re close to, while those people are coming into themselves and are on that journey.  And there are perfectly fair reasons for that -- no one owes us mistake after mistake.  But to call someone hopeless, and to abandon them completely doesn’t make sense to me.  I think it’s a spiteful thing to say to someone, and it certainly isn’t going to help them in any way.  I don’t believe that a best friend should ever say that to someone who’s struggling, who cares for them, and who trusts them.  If he needed some space, or the time to come to terms with what he can and cannot currently handle, he should have told you just that.  If he couldn’t be there for you, he should have honestly said so, and not just put you down while you’re trying your hardest to be the best version of yourself you can be.

It wasn’t fair to you at all, and your feelings are completely reasonable, Anon.

I don’t know the guy personally, so I can’t say for sure, but he might have just said that to you in the heat of the moment (which isn’t a good excuse, by any means, but does explain why he’d just totally fail you in that moment).  There may still be a way to have him in your life, but you’d both really have to talk this through carefully, honestly, and in-depth.  Giving him some time to cool down before approaching him with the suggestion of simply having this conversation is probably for the best.  

To see if he’s ready/willing to talk it out at some point, you could message/say to him “I understand that this is overwhelming for you right now, but I care about you, and I’m still in the process of growing and making progress.  I’m not going to give up on myself, or on our friendship.  If you need time, that’s perfectly okay, and I respect that, but I feel as though we need to talk this out eventually, and that can be when you’re ready.  Just let me know.”

Again, wait for a little while before approaching him this way, if you plan to do so!!! Because if someone is really upset, they may not react in a way that’s helpful to anyone, and I just don’t want him to lash out at you again while you’re in a vulnerable place.  If he does, remember it’s likely because he’s frustrated, and acting/speaking out of his own anger -- that is not your responsibility.  His emotions are something he has to work through, and like I said, you’re doing what you can to change for the better.  That’s enough.  So I would try not to take what he said to heart too much, because regardless of whether he means it or not (and I can’t speak for him, but I suspect it’s the latter), it isn’t true, and you are on your way to making up for your mistakes.

The best you can do is focus on yourself right now.  Practicing self-care and self-soothing is a good idea.  Even though it’s probably the last thing you feel like doing, do something nice for yourself.  Binge on some of your fave shows, fave books, fave games (anything that you typically enjoy doing, even if it feels hollow rn), and give yourself time to calm down a bit as well.  That way, when your emotions aren’t totally bowling you over, you can more easily consider problem-solving options.  I do think that issues like this can be talked through... but both parties have to be ready and willing to talk, and especially to listen.

If things feel too intense atm, and you’re worried that you’ll make an impulsive decision that could put your health in jeopardy, then calling a chat line, venting anonymously, and visiting some related forums might help... these people obviously don’t have all the answers, but they might have some ideas... and sometimes it’s even just nice to know that someone is listening to you.

http://codedredalert.tumblr.com/post/109005732295/helpline-masterlist

https://www.7cups.com/

And you can definitely continue talking to me about anything you want, Anon! My askbox is always open to you, and I’m here to listen as well -- my advice might not be right for you, but I can promise you that I do want things to work out for you, and I believe that you deserve to have that!

Take care, Anon!

[powerovernothing]

Different anon here: because I'm lame I crack myself up thinking of an au where yondu survives and travels with the guardians, getting to know them and slowly becoming more and mores done with his sons weird taste in friends.

Oh my, isn’t this a rare treat, and something that completely puts a massive smile on my face! To go from writing a super fun meta for one nice Anon based around our local space dad…and then to turn around and see that another lovely Anon has wandered into my askbox to discuss more Yondu things?

And not only that, but also share with me an adorable headcanon of him and his son post Vol 2 where everything is good and happy and nothing sad ever happened no matter what James Gunn tries to make us believe?

Oh, I am going to have a fun time with this~

(Lots of Yondad meta and headcanon under the cut, as well as a small drabble where Yondu and Drax get along and embarrass Peter! Prepare for feelings as well as silly things!)

First off, I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. The Guardians of the Galaxy fandom is just absolutely and all around lovely, and they certainly know their way to my heart with really great ideas coming from their really awesome minds!

Honestly, how could you not just adore this fandom and the people within it?!

Ah, but regardless! Hello there different, but equally as great, Yondu Anon! (Or would you rather me call you Yondad!Anon instead? Seems kind of fitting, yeah?) And thank you very much for popping into my askbox! Seeing all these messages from you guys just really makes my days all the more brighter; you just have no idea!

But there I go, getting off track; for shame! Anyway, you said that you make yourself giggle over a scenario where Yondu travels full time with Peter and his Guardian family after the events of the second film, and that he just, slowly but surely, becomes even more done with his son’s very bizarre choice of friends the more and more he gets to know them?

And, on top of everything, you somehow actually consider that idea to be lame?

Oh, but my dear Yondad friend! That is where you are sadly mistaken, because I don’t think that that idea is lame whatsoever! In fact, I think that it’s a very wonderful idea actually! And one that I, too, often think about in terms of post Vol 2 headcanons – be it silly or cute or just somewhere in between!

And actually, reading over your message reminded me of various ideas that me and my friend @packratofdenialism had in regards to Yondu’s relationship with the Guardians. The ones that come to mind first and foremost being that, other than Rocket and Groot, it would probably be Drax that Yondu would end up having the best kind of friendship with, before anyone else in the group.

And why him of all people, you may be wondering, and not someone like Mantis, considering that she is basically in some ways Peters’ adoptive sister, and Yondu has a thing for strays?

Well, honestly, the reasoning behind this is that Yondu and Drax are actually rather similar. Both warriors/killers with their own sense of honor, both fathers in their own right, both pretty bad with emotions, and yet ends up, after a massive tragedy, accepting a new family…as well as various others I’m probably not remembering.

And besides all that, there’s also the fact that both Yondu and Drax have one amazing ice breaker to spark their friendship. And something that would most certainly embarrass the hell out of Peter once he hears them talking about it.

That Drax was one of the first Guardians whom considered Yondu Peter’s father.

And since we’re all about giving out headcanons, and you had such an awesome one messaged to me above – how about I give you one in return? One that will give you all the emotions, possibly silly and heartwarming both?

(Inspired by late night conversations with @packratofdenialism​, love ya friend~!)

Because honestly, can you imagine the look on Yondu’s face when Drax pulls him aside and he begins to discuss just how wonderful the relationship that Yondu has with his son is? And how proud he must be to have raised such  a grand warrior, or how blessed Yondu should feel to see Peter grow and become a leader of his own crew?

I mean, it’s one thing to say it among friends, and have it be played off as a really big misunderstanding…

As well as have Peter totally deny that Yondu is the dad he’s always wanted, or that he ever called him Dad emotionally after he was saved from space, or how this is something that both father and son are still trying to get used to saying at all…but, dude, that’s only meant to be private sappy bullshit just between them! Not said in mixed company, or aloud, or ever! What the hell, Drax!

But to bring it up again, in a small ship where everyone can hear, and in front of Yondu no less! Peter isn’t sure whether to crawl under the ship’s controls or just smack his head repeatedly into the wall, because he knows well enough that nothing that comes out of this is going to be good, and he’ll probably never live it down…

I mean, just imagine!

“Ah, at long last! I get to go one on one with Quill’s father!” “Sure as hell hope yer not expectin’ the two o’us ta’arm wrest –” He pauses half way through his playful words; realizing slowly just what Drax said. “Wait, whadda’yer sayin’?”“You are indeed the true father of Star Lord? I know that your son tries to deny it with great enthusiasm, but it is surely so plain to see!”

So Peter would just groan aloud, because it was bad enough the first time around but now other members are listening in, and part of him just really hopes that Yondu will cut Drax off with some joke.

And yet, Yondu just smiles. Letting out that very asshole kind of laugh that is hidden with deeper emotion; because it may be slightly embarrassing to be considered Peter’s father by someone – as well as surprising, considering no one is judging him for said feelings…but somehow it just feels right.

“Hah, yeah, ah’guess ya could say ‘dat.”

And at hearing that Yondu isn’t angry, and is possibly going along with it, Peter just pops his head in and glares at them both with a massive blush on his cheeks.

“OH MY GOD YONDU NO. Don’t encourage him, ya stupid ass blueberry! Seriously, man, he’ll never stop at this rate and dude, we’re getting a damn audience here!”

And Drax interjects, because how rude of Peter to call his father a blueberry!

“Do not disrespect your father, Quill!”

And slowly, Yondu just looks over at Peter and sees his flustered look, because he knows that they were never the type for outward or open emotion. But after everything they went through, they could use a little bit of lighthearted teasing, and oh god it’s just so easy!

And he gives him a far too knowing smirk – like yep boy, ya wiggled yerself into dis, now ya gotta deal wit’it.

“Ey, ya heard him, son! Ya go on and treat yer daddy wit’ ‘sum kinda respect!”

And Peter just goes full on blood red, because oh my god Yondu why, and stomps out all the while screaming.

“THAT’S IT. IT’S OFFICIAL. I AM DISOWNING ALL OF YOU.”

Then Drax would look over at Yondu curiously; still hearing Peter squealing down the hallways.

“Is he always such –”

“A big ol’ drama queen? Hell yes. I mean, damn, th’ stories I could tell –” 

“Oh! Please share your tales, Udonta! I would be overjoyed to listen!”

Hours later, Peter comes back totally drunk, and being far too done with his new extended family of embarrassing people and dad jokes, and oh my god are those two still at it after all this time? If I turn that corner they better not be exchanging baby pictures, what the hell.

And Yondu is still next to Drax, and he has this massively proud smile on his face. And he’s explaining in detail about the first time that Peter tried to shoot the special blaster that that he had given his boy for his birthday, and how their training session ended with Peter accidentally shooting Yondu in the leg instead of the Yaka Arrow that was meant as the target.

And Drax is just laughing out loud, as he often does when he is happy, and Peter expects Yondu to still be angry because of the accidental maiming that happened all those years ago and yet –

“Boy gave me one helluva scar! Still got it too! And oh damn, was he sheepish! Thinkin’ I was gonna up and whup ‘im for doin’ it. Hell, lookin’ back I probably scared im’ cussa my shouting an’ all…but I was REAL DAMN PROUD!””As one should be! To know that your child holds the courage to take down his target no matter who it may be! That shows true strength!””And even’tho dat shit hurt like hell, I was just thinkin, durin’ his stupid ass apology, how ‘dat trick shot coul’ be used on the field! Git’im all backed inna corner, and hav’im hit his target when ‘dey least expect it?”“Ahaha! Imagine the look on your enemy’s face when they are taken down by such a small and frail child!”“Hell yeah! I mean, I always ‘igured Petey to be sumfin’ special, but after all ‘dat, th boy just kept on surprisin’ me!“

Maybe Peter assumes that half of this conversation is just his drunken mind playing tricks on him, because Yondu was, and is proud of him? And Drax is agreeing? And they’re actually getting along? And it’s not just at Peter’s expense?

Obviously he had one too many.

And yet, the more he continues to listen in secret, the more he sees his old man actually smiling, and sees him getting along with his team, and not having to worry about anything that Ego put on his shoulders, or Ravagers betraying him for daring to care…

And sure, maybe he’s still getting used to all of this; the thought of him having an actual family.

…One that is filled with talking raccoons and green skinned warriors, tiny trees that enjoys his odd taste in music and a blue skinned dad with a flying arrow, as well as a brother that still is loyal even though he doesn’t have to be after what happened with the Ravagers…

Okay, so maybe his family is a seriously weirdass one…but it’s still a family nonetheless. And the more that Peter thinks about it, the more he walks away from the conversation, and finds himself placing in certain earbuds from a certain Zune and playing a certain song to help him deal with his awful hangover…

…He realizes that yeah, embarrassing and mismatched and crazy as it may be, this family is still his – and it just feels right.

There you go, Anon! You gave me the wonderful idea of Yondu getting to know the Guardians and just wondering where he went wrong in Peter’s upbringing because SERIOUSLY SON WHY THESE IDIOTS. And in turn, I gave you an idea where everyone else slowly just becomes totally done with Yondu – mostly Peter, because THE EMBARRASSING STORIES, DAD WHY.

As well as some additional feelings on top of the silliness, because why not?

Thank you so much once more for coming into my askbox and talking Yondad related headcanons with me! I deeply appreciate it, always totally have fun with it, and I surely hope that you enjoyed my little mini fan fiction that I gave you in return! (If anyone wants that posted on it’s own without additional talk, just ask.)

Lots of hugs, hope you have a great day full of joy and fandom feelings, and I hope to see you around soon! Pop back in anytime!

[lauriesrpt]

dunno if you remember me, but i'm [-] anon? how have you been? told you i'd update you when i had some news and last night was... a toughie for me. the person and i have been expressing casual interest over the last week or two, and we both agreed to take it slow and just get to be friends. but last night i learned they were poly... and married. i expressed that i was hurt that this didn't come up when i started expressing obvious interest in them and they apologized and while they explained [-]

part 2: explained they didn’t share it right off the bat because of our agreement to take things slow in getting to know one another, they also said it didn’t excuse my hurt and really validated how i was feeling without trying to seem like they were blatantly keeping it from me. between the both of us we’ve always had an open ‘i’ll answer anything you ask’ policy. i just don’t know how to feel. it brought up, tangentially sort of, a lot of feelings i have about always being a 2nd or 3rd choice 

part 3: choice in someone’s life; never the first? which is why i always told myself i could never be in a poly relationship that wasn’t like closed on all sides. but i don’t know. they aren’t interested in anyone except for me and their spouse right now so i’m just sort of venting the situation to put it into words that might help me understand it better? thank you for being there for me. i appreciate you so much laurie. hope you have a great week

oh my loki, hi! i am SO happy to hear from you! i was wondering how you were doing, actually (look at me paying more attention to lovely anons than my finals, awesome). well i’ve been through a pretty hard time that explains why i took a break from this blog. hopefully i’ll be better when i’ll finish this semester. i assume you’ve been on a roller coaster and i am so sorry for you, honey! i know ‘you’ll be okay’ type of hollow encouragements can’t change much, but i wish you the best already to give your heart a break. you deserve it! so, now, let’s go on to your story. 

ARE. YOU. KIDDING. ME. i don’t know if i should be crazy mad or crazy sad. i am very glad this person showed you they were understanding despite the (let’s be honest) quite awful circumstances, but still… you can’t just hide that? i would get it if this person was single at the moment but have been used to polyamorous relationship so they would search for the same thing and kept you out of their plans to see how things would go. you both agreed to taking it slow and this, to me, would be the type of slow you asked for. but married?!  m a r r i e d ??? to their end it seems completely fine to ander around while being married, but he should have asked your views on marriage and see if there was indeed room for a more open thing than a traditional relationship. does that make sense? probably not. i am in no way judging you for developping feelings for this person. the truth is, i would probably have too. caring, understanding, gentle and patient partners are rare to find and they seem to have checked all the boxes, so i get why you got so attached to them. but they dropped the biggest bomb ever! i am so sorry, love. 

ah, being someone’s second choice (and therefore third!)… if only you knew how much i related to this fear! if they do express out loud that they are deeply and honestly interested in you, that would be great. at this point, it is an issue of trust (i understanding going slowly and getting to know each other, but that’s something very sensitive and i do stand by the fact you should have been warned since the beginning) and you deserve truth. i just can’t help thinking they love their spouse more, obviously, so even if they liked you, you’d always be a bit of a backup? considering they didn’t meet you while being with their spouse, how do they know you’ll be welcome around? it might be noisy to ask for the terms of their polyamorous relationship (maybe they just do whatever they want but never introduce a third person within the marriage), but oh well... i’m so confused too, sad and even a bit hurt for you. i remember how hard you told me you were falling for that person and this does change the situation completely. 

this time, i am left with too many questions to give you any advice, so instead i’ll just suggest you to come back to my askbox asap if you need someone to listen again. you are in a really tough situation and all i can tell you is to follow your heart & your mind. if your heart desires this person but your mind knows something is fishy and might potentially bring you a lot of pain, compromises and sacrifices. you said it yourself, you know you can’t be in this kind of situation yet you’re stuck in it and this is so unfortunate. i really wish you the best and i hope to hear from you again. i was of absolutely no help today, but my IM and askbox are always open for you to stop by and talk so more. i hope the best is yet to come for you and that things will clear up slowly without you suffering too much. i wish you an amazing week and never hesitate to come back! it made my day to hear from you again. i appreciate you too! 

this follows that previous answered ask and this one too! 

[miyaameow]

Yoosung x MC - Rika’s Exposure (Pt. 3)

y’all are too cute!! I’m so happy that you guys like my writing oml thank you guys so much :) I’ve put my other requests on hold to work on this continuation so i hope you guys like this haha  (⌒▽⌒)☆

You couldn't believe your eyes... was that really Yoosung? That disfigured and broken boy lying on the hospital bed, it just couldn’t possibly be him. Your vision blurred as your eyes started to fill up with tears. How could this have happened to him? Biting your trembling lip, you reached out for his hand, wary of his bandaged wrists. 

"MC, I’m sure he'll be okay, he's a strong boy." V patted your shoulder reassuringly, but it didn't stop the tears from streaming down your face. 

"H- how did this happen?" 

"I... don’t know. After I got your message, I went his apartment, and the door was unlocked. Then I went in and I saw Yoosung lying on the floor with-" 

"Stop. Please, no more. I don't want to hear anymore." 

You were too afraid of V's description of Yoosung's broken body lying in a pool of blood to allow him to go on. But more than anything, you were afraid of the truth. The truth that this was all because of you. You didn't want to hear it - not from V, not from anyone, because you already knew the answer. It was you who broke him; you who cut him, hurt him.

Though the rest of the RFA had visited, you greeted them with complete silence. You stayed by his side and watched the monitor tirelessly, making sure his heart wouldn’t stop beating until night fell, and you finally opened your mouth to speak.

“This- this was all my fault. Please just wake up. I won’t ever bother you again... I just need you to live. I know you can’t hear me right now, but I wanted to let you know that... that I love you, and I’m really, really sorry. I was a selfish, inconsiderate ass and I know I can’t take back what I said. I don’t deserve you, but if you could listen to me just once more - please don’t give up. You have to fight through this, I know you can. The RFA will be here to support you. As for me... I don’t think I have the right to stay with all of you anymore.”

With a deep breath and whatever will you had left in you, you got up from the visiting chair and left the room. Fighting the urge to turn back, you limped your way back to your room, got dressed and disappeared into the night.

...

A year had passed. Funny how time passes so quickly even when your days are full of guilt and fear. Everyday you wondered how he was doing. Like whether or not he was eating healthily, or if he found someone new, someone better to lean on. There wasn’t a hint of jealousy, only pain and heartaches. The RFA tried to contact you the first few months after you left, but they stopped after that. Maybe they gave up, maybe they realized that they didn’t need you, or maybe they found out the hideous nature of your actions.

But it didn’t matter, right? The RFA had nothing to do with you anymore, and you had nothing to do with them. Then why did it hurt you so much whenever you saw Jumin on the TV? Why did you get an empty pang of guilt in your gut seeing Zen on social media? Why did it break your heart every time you saw the game shop on the corner of the street?

It was because you owed them. You owed them an apology, owed Yoosung an apology. But there was no way you were going to see them again. You couldn’t face them - you didn’t have the right to see them or talk to them. And you certainly did not have the right to see Yoosung. 

...

On a particularly early morning, you walked groggily into a Starbucks and mumbled your regular order. After what felt like forever, the barista handed you your drink, and you turned around carelessly, conveniently bumping into the person behind you.

“Sorry about that... thank God this had a cap on it.” you said, more to yourself than the other person. You remained staring at your cup of coffee with your mind half awake.

“Yea, it’s no problem.”

There was something familiar about his voice. Something nostalgic. Something sweet. You sighed and finally raised your eyes to meet his. 

Your breath hitched in shock at the sight of his eyes. Purple. 

His eyes were purple. Could that be Yoosung? 

No, his hair was brown. Yoosung had blond-

“Yoosung-oppa! What’s taking you so long? Who are you talking to?” a girl with an annoying tone disrupted your thoughts as you watched her approach him from behind.

“Sorry, I just accidentally bumped into her. I’ll get your coffee now.” He flashed you a kind smile and turned to leave.

And then it hit you. She called him... Yoosung. So it really was him. It was him but he... it was like he didn’t recognize you. 

It was almost as if he had forgotten you completely.

I hope this is okay haha (´•ω•`๑) thanks for reading~ 

P.S. not sure if this can go for part 4 but if anyone’s interested I could churn something up LOL

also regarding the Rika thing uhh i can’t really explain it?? It was just what the original anon requested so xD sorry about that.  And if you're wondering how V can see let's just say he got an operation after what Rika did lol.

~Cherry L.

Part 1: click here

Part 2: click here

Part 4: click here

Masterpost: click here

Askbox/Requests: click here

[baesketballers]

If I can chime in really quickly about this Hanamiya (and KiriDai by extension) vs. Haizaki thing - they're both pretty nasty dudes with bad personalities and low morals, but Hanamiya does the things he does because he wants to tear others down and sometimes literally break them, while Haizaki does the things he does because he literally just does whatever he wants without caring about others or the consequences to his actions. That being said, I'd say Haizaki is just the lesser of two evils

thehypestdeano said: And it’s shown that KiriDai doesn’t need to be violent in order to win, but they still do so to ruin morale of the opposing team by taking out their best players. Really, it’s just them being sadistic, there’s no other reason :/ Haizaki has injured other players on the court before too when he stomped on Kise’s bad foot during their game as a sort of last resort to hinder him, so he’s not above it, but he doesn’t seem like the type to do that unless he’s desperate, since he’s GOM level talent

(Very interesting discussion we have today!) Man I legit forgot that Haizaki stomped on Kise’s foot that was also freaking infuriating thank you for reminding me that the guy can also play foul if he wants to. 

I have to agree when you say Haizaki does stuff because he just does whatever he wants to do. That’s why I called him a grade-A douchebag. Aside from that, I really can’t overlook Kirisaki Daiichi’s playing style (if you can even call it that)… 

Anonymous said: 1-3 thanks for answering my question :) tbh i don’t really have to agree or disagree with you coz i myself don’t have an established opinion on hanamiya and kiridai. naturally when i first watched knb i hated all of them for hurting kiyoshi (i cried so much in those episodes). but as i think you know, bad boys have this appeal on women, and more esp if it’s in fiction. fans can just alter personalities or situations to suit their fantasies. i’ve requested for hanamiya on other scenario blogs

2-3because as a fangirl, i’m attracted to him. not his violent personality on-court ofc. but since it’s a girl’s fantasy, even someone’s personality such as hanamiya’s can be twisted to suit a romantic aspect. i guess that’s what’s drawing me and some others in? though obviously when you disregard fantasy and only see the way they injure people to secure their victory, it’s really disgusting.

3-3 some fans just overlook the reality (in the fiction), but i see that you don’t. that’s nice, though, sticking to your beliefs and morals :)

Hi anon, thanks for asking the question! I can understand when other fangirls/boys of Hanamiya/Kiridai are attracted to them because of the bad boy personality. I’ve read somewhere that girls (although I think this applies to boys too) tend to gravitate towards boys with their kind of personality because they want to be the one to “tame” the boys. As in, they want to be the one to “teach” these bad boys what love is and make them stop playing around or whatever. And I feel that this has some truth to it, although of course it doesn’t apply to everyone. So I understand that people are attracted to Hanamiya/Kiridai, just to make it clear, it’s not that I’m implicitly talking bad about people who like them. I was just expressing personal distaste.

Thank you for pointing out the fact that a fictional character’s personality can be twisted in fanmade stuff to cater to people’s fantasies (or even the creator’s fantasies). This is nearly always accurate to headcanons/scenarios/imagines: a writer that is not the original writer (fanwriters I guess, like me) can only guess/speculate/assume how the characters are going to react in a certain situation based on their personality that is shown in the series. Considering that Kuroko no Basket doesn’t really show romantic (and sexual) situations, writers can only imagine how these characters become when provided with said situations, and in this case, there is no right or wrong. It’s up to our imagination.

That said, when a writer portrays Hanamiya as secretly tsundere when he’s in love with his s/o, no one has the right to object. You can, of course, share and discuss the different ways each one of you interpret the character. Overlooking the “reality” while consuming fan-content is also somewhat okay to me, unless it becomes so off that it’s out of character (OOC, the lines of which are different according to different people) and throws me out of the experience lol

that’s nice, though, sticking to your beliefs and morals :)

I can be an idealist sometimes. In fact, I think I’m an idealist most of the time so that explains why I can’t write Hanamiya… 

Again, I’m sorry if any of you guys are waiting for the Kirisaki Daiichi gang to be included in the list of characters I can write, or if any of you guys are disappointed that Haizaki is in the list while Kiridai isn’t. I hope these discussion posts help you understand my reasoning. If you’d like to open discussion for other characters/hop in on this one (penny for your thoughts?), the askbox is yours ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ