#someone pls tell me this is okay lmaoooo

[kalashtars]

how are you supposed to know. when it's okay to join a discord.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

my favorite mulder moments from s3

when he’s dead in episode 1, in the afterlife being urged to return to his body, and it is only only hearing that his sister isn’t there which convinces him to come back to life (we can analyze this for years and we should!)

after their narrow escape from the disease center in episode 2, skinner asks what mulder could possibly hope to find in his wildest dreams. his answer: “why they killed my father. and what happened to my sister. and what they did to agent scully” which pretty much proved that she is part of his family to him <3 and he just wants to protect his family and keep everybody safe... i'll cry

and despite how badly he wanted the truth and was willing to risk it all, he agreed to turn the tape they had nearly died over so they could come out of hiding, so scully could see if her sister was okay (AUGHHH putting his life's ambition on hold for her...)

(this is more to do with behind the scenes stuff, but there’s a little moment in episode 7 where his hair is all messed up, and then in the very next shot it’s all fixed again, and i thought it was so funny to see, because you could tell he got retouched between takes)

in that same episode there’s also a moment where he keeps replaying a mysterious noise over and over again. scully asks if he has found anything, and he replies “no, but i’m really beginning to like the tape” with a big goofy smile <3

in episode 9, he has his office set up like a movie theater, with his feet tossed up on on the desk. he is SO excited to show scully the alien autopsy video he ordered from a magazine for $29.95!!!

then he comments that “it’s widely held that aliens don’t have blood, scully” with great seriousness which had me LOSING it. yes of course, mulder, she CLEARLY should have known!

(later in that episode, skinner comes down to scold them, and asks why they’re even in pennsylvania, to which he says that they’re here on a “video piracy case” <- LMAOOOO least convincing lie ever told)

also in episode 9: his line “you think believing is easy?” followed by letting that sit for a bit, exploring the tensions and implications- how hard it is for mulder to keep the faith that there are answers in this world, and perhaps even justice to go along with them. how it doesn’t come as naturally to him as you may think, it’s about hope and protecting your loved ones and doing whatever it takes, killing or dying, to learn the Truth, because the Truth is hope

(at this point in taking notes, i proceeded to ramble on for like a paragraph with Intense Emotions, and even talking about this episode again is making me want to go on a lecture tour about how fantastic it was)

in episode 10, a passenger on the train with her child sees the dead body of a doctor and screams. mulder pivots, tells the woman that the doctor is just sick, smiles, and ruffles the kid’s hair

(he ruffles another kid’s hair in episode 23… don’t think i didn’t notice)

angrily quoting scripture in episode 11

(and he also says he considers the bible to be poetry rather than a literal history in this one, which i think is fascinating)

sitting in his car, watching the night sky in episode 12, when he asks over the phone: “look scully, i know it’s not your inclination, but did you ever look up into the night sky and feel certain that not only was something up there, but it was looking down at you at the exact same moment, and was just as curious about you as you are about it?” goshhh what a wonderful way to see the world... a universe of mutual curiosity with answers that can be found if only you are dedicated enough to hunt for them

dr. ivanov’s little bug robot liking mulder and following him around <3 someone pls get him a cat!!

AND that episode wrapup: “the development of our cerebral cortex has been the greatest achievement of the evolutionary processes. big deal.” <- it had me absolutely giggling… as a profiler and student of the human brain, it really IS a big deal!! he knows that!! but he was so angry about how it all went down his bitterness won that day lmaooo

(BUT ALSO: he wakes up in his JEANS in this episode??? what kind of dude SLEEPS in his JEANS... we need to launch a full federal investigation)

when he tries to call to the kitty in episode 14 <3

and then he goes to the library to read up on gargoyles, but he was pulling so many all-nighters that he just straight up fell asleep on the table, and it was So Cute

in episode 15, he knows that "ronin" is the term for a samurai without a master, which made me laugh (and he claims he knows it from watching samurai movies… nerd!)

when he hops into an empty grave in episode 19 and starts digging with his hands while someone yells “what the hell is he doing!” and scully watches, knowing that is the sort of behavior he is just hardwired to do

mulder (possibly) eating an entire sweet potato pie in episode 20. narrative-wise we shall never know the truth.

how intensely attached he is to skinner being revealed in episode 21; how he believes whole-heartedly that he is innocent even when all of the evidence is against him. how when skinner dismisses his case as none of their business mulder counters with "of course it is", as if there was no other option. how he listens to skinner’s stories of terror in vietnam. how he is disappointed skinner won’t tell him what really happened that night. if you want to cry, go watch that scene where he leaves skinner's office realizing he won't talk about it. it made me emotional.

(he also pulls a giant book off his shelf in that episode and flips to the page talking about succubi, which makes me wonder what other kinds of literature he keeps in his office, pls let me come browse)

((there is also a moment where he gets really angry and pushes his jacket back with his hands on his hips and i swear my heart nearly stopped))

episode 22’s “i know the difference between expectation and hope. seek and you shall find, scully” it's just SO good and so Him

when he visits her motel room in episode 23 and gets all cozied up on her couch to talk case theories... i was giggling!!!

how he tries so hard to be brave and hold it together when she is missing in that one, too- calling her mother to check where she is, apologizing for disturbing mrs. scully because he knows how intense this must be for her after everything her daughter has gone through, bouncing his basketball in his apartment to keep himself moving, how he tells the lone gunmen with an even voice that she isn’t okay when he needs to go ID a body, and how he kicks the door of the man who got them involved with this case, forgoing answers for her. ripping my hair out from all my emotions btw.

mulder being convinced that he could talk scully back into her senses even after she shot at him (!!!) and refusing to accept her mother’s answers that she wasn’t at her home

when he visits scully in the hospital after her wavelength-induced psychosis, he enters the room with his hands up, jokingly surrendering after she had held him at gunpoint. because he cannot be serious ever, and he Needs to make a joke and lighten the mood, to try and make her feel comfortable. 

AND how he turns the TV off when he enters, knowing what the TV did to get her there. and how he leaves after a while, whispering “why don’t you try and get some rest?” on the way out, so scared to have seen her like that, wanting to give her all the time she needs to recover <3

in the finale he sits by his mom in her hospital bed; he holds her hand, notices she is cold and covers her with a blanket (gosh that one made me inconsolable- scully was talking to him and he couldn't even respond, because his mom was cold, and he needed to fix that, to make her comfortable)

he touches her hair and whispers “mom”, and smiles at her when she opens her eyes, saying everything is going to be okay; then later, he’s crying as he holds her hand to his cheek, and i’m crying too

and when they go to meet up with “jeremiah smith” later, he makes scully get behind him, holding the only weapon that could kill jeremiah in his hands and standing in front of her to keep her safe

[bass-alien]

someone pls tell me my fit for odesza this weekend actually looks okay because now I’m overthinking and worried that it’s too much boob for an odesza show lmaoooo

[mrhowells]

Smallville 4x14

I love this episode a lot🥹

THAT'S ADORABLE😭😭

"You're gonna be fine. I know you're gonna be fine. Everyone I've ever hit was alright."

Lois -everyone I've ever hit was alright- Lane:

Clark really sleeps on the couch now that Lois lives there? LMAOOOO

the way he immediately smiles when he sees the dog I can't🥹🥹

"You hit him? With your car?" "No, with my fist🙄🙄"

CLARK YOUR FACE-

"Actually, I think it might be fun to have a dog around."

HE'S A MENACE, HE'S A DISGRACE, HE'S A FUCKING CLOWN, I LOVE HIMMMMMMMM

I'm crying

"I don't know. It's just kind of hard to be myself with her around."

that's so ironic though because apart from hiding his powers he is VERY himself around her

I need Tom Welling to stop smiling on my screen please and thank you, I'm not strong enough for this😭

ugh😩

Chloe helping Clark with his excuses, love to see it🥹 He's so bad at them he needs all the help he can get💀

Let me introduce you to my parents who have been married for about 30 years now:

"Let's see. He's annoying, and I can't get within ten feet of him without getting sick. I think we should call him Clarkie."

have I mentioned how much I love them before?

"I spent all morning on these."

they're both so cute🥹🥹

LMAOOOOOO he finds her so annoying

hsajaksjaksj LOOK AT HIS HAND IN THE SECOND IMAGE, HE'S SO DONE I'M SCREAMING

No because if I keep going like this I'll screenshot every single time they say something or even look at each other💀

Lois: You could be Skipper😇

Clark: *fake ass smile* anyway-

STAHP I'M SCREAMING

he's about to throw hands💀

This is so confusing, I thought Jason's mom orchestrated the entire meeting with Lana but now she wants him away from her?

"Paranoia is not a very attractive quality in a woman."

Umm okay, AND? I mean I don't give a shit about Genevieve but this is such a dumb statement, as if she's supposed to give a fuck about what's "attractive" to Lex or others, like what?

Sometimes he sounds like one of those "pick up artists" that the internet makes fun of all the time, I'm sorry💀💀

I. LOVE. THIS.

That's the way someone talks to their own kid, not their guest and I love that because Lois clearly lacks parental love. Martha & Lois will always be so special to me😭😭

"Remember when Clark did that? He was only... three." LMAOOOO

Lex is clearly losing patience with Clark😬

Can I join this family pls look at themmmm

Martha is such a badass actually

I'm glad Lana overheard that whole conversation between Jason and his mother, now I'm just hoping they'll give her more agency instead of making her a passive character and her own storyline.

(edit: so she did NOT hear what they were talking about🤡🤡 At least she saw it)

Clark is such a little shit😭

Still arguing about dog names🤡

"Hold on there Forrest Gump, what are you gonna do, run?" LOL

She's like nuh uh, get in the car dude AND HE LISTENS💀💀💀

How are they acting like they're been married for decades???

NOT AN ACTUAL QUESTION BC I KNOW HOW AND I'LL TELL YOU: they're comfortable around each other even if they don't realize it

🎶and I will go down with this ship🎶 (EXCEPT I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING SAILING, IT WILL NEVER GO DOWNNNNN)

let's move on

"What is this, another one of your famous hunches or are we just on a little scenic route?"

"Okay, stop here."

"Wha- where??"

"HERE. Stop here."

"OKAY."

>>>MARRIED.

they sound like my grandparents💀

LOOK AT MY LIL POOKIES INVESTIGATING STUFF TOGETHER🥺

YEEEEET

I need to know where Clark gets his clothes bc that stuff withstands literally anything💀

AKJASJKAKSL STAHP😭

"He (the dog) saved my life. I'll take my chances on his loyalty." Ooof, is he calling out Lex👀

what is Lionel trying to do?🧐

CUTE.

CUTE.

Clark is happy = I'm happy, it's really that simple

this episode is premium, top tier chef's kiss EXCELLENT

[thesherrinfordfacility]

✨ episode 5 - running commentary✨

- this episode better be the one to Alter My Brain Chemistry, I NEED AN explanation for the too fast for me scene pls

- THEY BETTER KISS I S2G

- right okay hi shax I hate you 😘 but Miranda is killing WAIT TEN THOUSAND WHAT THATA OVERKILL ITS ONE SILLY BILLY ANGEL AND A DUMB ASS DEMON

- "can I watch" crowley TONE IT DOWN KINKY BOY

- "there will be sandwiches" LOL IM IN BABES

- DOCTOR WHO lmao harpischord guy get fucking SERVED

- HES JUST TEMPTED SOMEONE AND GIVEN AWAY A BOOK??? my guy going through some ROUGH character development

- hell is literally so understaffed wtf

- MAGIC SHOP AGAIN YES

- ERDNASE REFERENCE ERDNASE REFERENCE

- Crowley is so proud of his husband BUT THAT FEZ NEEDS TO GOOOOO

- neil if you ever read this pls can we have aziraphale be a permanent party planner bc he does the mostest and pls ignore my criticism of ep1 and 2 I take it all back pls pls more aziraphale planning tf out of shit

- SHAX MOMMY YES💅💅💅 ALSO ERIC MY BELOVED My sweet baby boy

- FRENCH AZIRAPHALE YOU NEED TO STOP crowley is FED UP he looks like a kid whose mum got caught chatting at the supermarket

- aziraphale pls stop

- NINA KNOWS WHATS UP GAY SPOTS GAY

- no crowley don't make that face no why why why WHY YOU LOOKING LIKE THAT😭😭😭✨ he loves you CROWLEY YOU BLIND FUCKKNG IDIOT and you love HIM you emotionally stunTED APE

- the glasses and sideburns are still BUGGING ME someone explain did he go shOPPING OFF SCREEN????

- ERIC NO BYEBYE MY LOVERRRRR

- wow that was a long pre credit bit wtf

- DATE???? oh no crowley is pulling away no no no

- "SMUT?" fucking OKAY??? DO IT THEN YOU PUSSY ASS BITCH✨💓

- fuck they're about to have a Conversation aren't they and get drunk and it's about to get EMOTIONAL

- Crowley FUCK

- CROWLEY BOO

- "friend" ok lol

- he's about to throw mf HANDS but goob is so innocent NO WAIT CROWLEY NO DOMT DO THAT oh thank fuck

- matchbox ajamakajalam sns

- lmao the growth that Crowley just did in 30 seconds gave me WHIPLASH

- Muriel no pls don't do it bbygirl💓💓 OH GOD YOUVE GONE DONE IT NOW

- ah Jim's mug

- DECORATING MIRACLES YES BABY

- WAIT AND SEE ✨✨✨✨

- oh aziraphale I love u so MUCH 😭😭😭

- Mrs sandwich I LOVE HER no aziraphale don't ask pls bby

- CROWLEY WHAT U SNIFFIN HONEY UR LIKE A BLOODHOUND FOR TROUBLE WHAT A POWER

- GOOB YOU ARE FABULOUS DARLING I LOVE JT✨

- "you young people"

- F BOMB FUCK YES

- oh no Maggie no not you CROWLEY YOU HERO GOD BLESS tell em babes

- lmao are they even gonna get to dance this is so stressful

- Mrs sandwich just chill out honey you are a madam SEX WORK IS VALID REAL WORK I said what I said

- "have a vol au vent" SO MARRIED💓

- omg am i now liking Maggie and nina hmmmmmmm AZIRAPHALE'S FACE crowley you could have that IF YOU EVEN TRIED MY GUY

- I HAVE SUCH JACKET ENVY LMAOOOO goob you are the only valid character

- WHAT no stop goob stop

- fuck OFF THEY ACTUALLY SANCE FUXK KM SWEATINF NOOOOOOK💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

- AHHHHHHHHHHHHH BOYS PLEASE

- well fuck that's put a spanner in the works

- aziraphale go fucking NAILS GET THEIR ASS oh that's not good✨

- GOOBY NO BE QUIET SHHHHHH

- GOOB NO

- NO GOOB

- the mf coat is SPECTACULAR ✨✨✨✨ did they spend the whole budget on it???? HES SO FABULOUS AND FRUITY

- oh my god the miracle is working against them fuck

- the fact that the humans are just chilling lmaoooo

- NEIL WE NEED CROWLEY AS A LAWYER PLS THANK U they just got SEVRED✨💓

- lmao IT WAS FAKE HAHAHAHAHA

- Mr brown shut up pipe down back in your box

- see that's what you get when you run your mouth

- IS THIS EVERY

- CMON GIVE ME EVERY

- oh my god crowley is the PATRON VIRGIN saint of sex work I LIVE FOR IT god bless or maybe not

- IS THAT A PRAISE KINK I SEE

- "rescuing me makes him so happy" FUCKING DECEASED

- Muriel lmao we know this it's ok bby take HIM TO HEAVEN IN THE ANGEL-ON-THE-ASS TRACKSUIT

- the MUSIC OKAY ITS GOOD NOW YES YES YES✨

- GOING UP

- I'm dead

[thevampirearchive]

Commentary on Interview With The Vampire - Episode 4 (Spoilers)

Now why did I think that was a cotton tree. Does Cotten even grow on trees? Okay

Omfg diaries! CLAUDIA MA CHÈRIE!

Black Angel :) he is beautiful! Pls, I love this!

From a young person perspective, I’m with Lestat. Imagine being a child forever? I’d loose my mind. @ vampires pls don’t turn me till I’m a crisp 35 pls and thank you.

“I dont know” I know this pisssed Lestat off. Like why you bring her here WITHOUT ANY PLANS? But also? Same Louis, same.

And ofc begging will help because Lestat would literally do anything to make his man’s happy, king.

Louis trusting Lestat and not saying anything as he nearly drained her —- iktr

Pls not a street cat, I love her.

“If you want it to be” Louis where will she go if it’s not pls he’s so nice, giving options and not tryna scare her. Lestat would have said yes ofc, and if you need anything else, tell me because I’m very rich.

“That make him the dumb one” not me weezing, child pls. And all while Lestat in the dark.

I love this tho, them communicating like this and watch Lestat be jealous as he should.

“What’s he saying” he’s so irritated! This is the reality Edward Cullen thinks he wants but trust, he doenst. Nobody does.

Relying on Louis words alone would make me anxious cuz it’s not like they understand eachother most of the time. And now miss C has access ? Yeah hang in their Lestat.

Not him calling her his lil Milkweed — IM SCREAMING

“Family secrets” awwwww. And Lestat got so happy! I’m so exited.

Uncle Les and Daddy Lou are the cutest nicknames!

Aww her observing them! She’s so cute.

Pls not the vegetarian parents vs the carnivore parent feuding. EAT HIM EAT HIM EAT HIM! Love how she sounds a lil sad but not for long cuz she about to have the best time and Louis will scream cry throw up

Lmaoooo ‘it has movement’ no because speak! Lestat, pls, You’ve been dragged for your outfits twice while we watched, you’re not a fashion icon pls you’re just French.

Pls not her smelling someone better hhhhahahahaa glad the swans are safe.

Ew not the singing, she’s so creepy, it’s perfect!

‘Not a cop’ Claudia said ACAP purr, that’s my niece for sure.

Lmaooo not now Lestat, he’s really tryna ‘that’s my baby’ rn? We’re busy bro pls have your proud father moment at home (but yes that’s y’a girl! PEIROD)

Lestat smiling at Louis as he really he’s him what Lestat taught him :) and I’m sure he’s especially happy because Louis had that whole morality dilemma. And now, he’s not even springing it on Claudia! Good!

Lmao she’s so pouty , same. Start screaming and kicking. “From starvation” hahahahaha ON HER KNEES, pls they need to pay attention or she’ll eat the streets💀

LMAO she’s having too much fun! FROG LEGS? Y’all sure this isn’t Leatats daughter?

Not her smashing the macaron, I know Lestat screamed cry threw up at the sight. It’s his country’s national treasur!

Hahahah not Kill Juice!

I love how she plays in the light! She’s such a kid Argh same.

Yes Daddy Lou is cute but Lil waif? Lmao not him calling her a fucking abandoned neglected poor orphan to her face 😭names go hard tho tho — they should drop a track

‘The book is her friend’ not Louis translating to Lestat who still don’t get it. She talks to books cuz she her daddy’s daughter hello? What’s not clicking.

Pls not the pen scribbling, it’s so loud 😭

And they squished in the coffin like sardines! MAMA,WE TRAPPED INNA THIS BOMBOOOOOOOO! WE CANNOT ESCAPE WE CANNOT GET OUT! WE TRAPPED LOKE A PACK OF SARDINES

NOT Lestat tryna threaten her and she unbothered, PEIROD. Nobody cares if your tiers uncle Les, answer the question 🔫

Omg! Louis French is good :) lmao Lestat just yelling FUCJING he’ll. Iconic. Lestat is super young-acting tho so idk how that was thrown at him. He’s mad cuz he cannot sleep, he cannot rest, 🎶a single mom who works two jobs —🎶

Pls not her testing the coffin, same.

Hahahahahahah not his feet in her face, baby was traumatized!

Not catching them get it on, ‘you miss me’ 🤓 yes pookie, hahaha I loved that

Glad Claudia realizes the hypocrisy, but don’t question him too much 😭 glad Louis set her straight cuz he’s been yelled at now a lil too much.

Pls not him explaining queerness, purr. She’s so freaking cute! Perfect casting!

Pls Claudia looks disgusted THAT FISH LOOKS NASTY INDEED. He’s tryna convert her and she’s still frowning, lmaoo. I lowkey don’t like this cuz he’s confusing her because he’s so tightly connected to his humanity still vs her adjusting so well already.

Pls not the call for prayer, mashallah. i could go on a 7 day rant about vampires and Muslims, and how Christian’s should step aside cuz their religion does not have the full facilities to hold such supernatural creatures to begin with! PURR

Claudia was out here on some author shit. Wrote all down like her life depended on it.

Her room is so nice. Lmao not her throwing stuff at him I’m screaming!

I’m glad she explains how time flies, cuz some ppl think eternal immortality is = boredom. YOU FOOLS!

Aww she truly is a child! Gets between her dads when they fight? Many of us are having war flashbacks, I bet.

Pls not them watching Nosfaratu and laughing! Same. The mockery. Pls

Another funeral, haven’t people died enough? And She wore red to a funeral? Baby, I bet it was lestats idea.

Pls not his sister against same

Sex parents hahahahahahahahha enough.

Not the smugness of Louis, same💀 I bet he’s sad tho, but still resentful after all.

Pls not his sister thinking Lestat pays for it all.. he does but Louis pays him back :/ put some respect on his name. And the threat. Pls! Their like a lil family of killers.

NOT THE SMELL! She was stood up there like that picture of blue Ivy

Lestat pls be Fr! cuz he acts however he wants and doenst care, and that’s why her behavior was fine lmaoo

Uncle Les and you are Evil Twins lmao, iconic evil twins.

Not him having the most convekyrrd complicated sex talk 😭 even i was slime huh? So he’s teaching her how to drive and what love and sex is? Iconic.

If someone called me belladonna I’d scream, that’s my fav nickname for her — why is he comparing her to drugs like this? Sir? 😭

Pls not them hunting together how Louis said he hated. Louis did tell her she hated it for a reason and I see why, but I see why Lestat loves it. Creepy, weird, enticing snd perverse.

Lmao not her just jumping him, I love this scene. “She’s with me” purr.

She’s realizing! I love it! But realizing too hard cuz now you playing grown.

‘Jumped a girl’ LMAO period, Lestat is so proud of her and Louis is terrified 😭I’m both 🫶🏾 Except that outfit is giving elderly, she truly is lestat’s daughter.

Pls, not darkie, I’m triggered y’all. 💀 NOT DARKIE. Almost had her commit homicide.

Omg he kinda looks like Louis’ brother :) omg.

Oh my gosh, she’s like a fanfic writer her thoughts hve be giggling.

She reads so fast she doenst even look down, me when? All so she could go see her man’s do his rounds!

THE FLOWERS! PLS! Not the blocking! ‘This is your father speaking’ LOUIS GET OUT OF HER HEAD! Can a girl get some privecy in here ?

Omg she’s matured so much! WAIT! I need a timeline cuz she said 19, is she lying or has 2. Years passed? If so, it took her almost 2 years to complete one diary? That seems fake.

Pls not the horse 😭 she’s finally getting what she wanted. But now I’m scared. ‘Your an Angel’ leave that man’s neck alone baby girl, cuz it cannot end good! YOUR KILLING HIM! CLAU! CLAU! NOOOOO! The horse fighting for its life in the back cuz she killed him!

I love her and I’m so sorry baby girl but not taking him home knowing your uncle is Lestat…. He’s gonna hurt your feelings Fr

‘He’s dead’ thump — I AN SCREAMING.

Louis: Lestat :/ — translation: be empathetic pls

Lestat: :) what? :)? — Translation: I keep telling y’all we vampires but everybody in this fucking house wants to mess around and be entangled with humans so this why y’all get, bodies bodies bodies..

‘Clean up after yoursel’ AND IM SCREAMING AGAIN. Y’all don’t understand this is him when he’s angry. When he’s yelling and shit? That’s him hurt and frustrated. Smiling and smooth and snip? Yeah y’all have him pissed.

Talk about taking actions for your responsibility. Lestat would be a ‘let it cry itself to sleep’ type of parent. He has to teach her tho or she’s gonna be miserable. And I love how harsh he is with her cuz this is exactly how Louis would have had to face the music if Lestat wasn’t so in love and so afraid of loosing him that he forced gentleness and patience out. Lestat fed up tho, he cannot have a Louis 2.0 situation, Mans 159, he’s tired.

“I don’t want you” 🤨 Louis, quickly, who does this remind you of? Option 1. You? Option 2. toi?

Not Anne Frank and Stephen king, Daniel…. 😀

‘I had two and their—’ lmaooo Daniel finish the sentence 💀

They have a lot of dark eras of their lives, ngl.

‘Bandaid for a shitty marriage’ DANIEL😭 this man must be an earth sign cuz what’s this brutality. Taurus maybe ? Or a

Coffin scene smacked. Omg the flavors! Me at 3am having yet another mental breakdown nBUT WORST. She’s realizing everything and it’s rushing thru her, poor baby about to end it. Pls and the nock on wood, CLAUDIA

LESTAT! LOUIS! GET HER! Their truly parents to an emo child cuz she basically cutting and venting to paper and I cannot beleive that’s how it ends :/ GIVE ME MORE DAMN IT!

[lcngliive]

Was that [TOM GLYNN-CARNEY]? Oh no no, that was just [ROBBIE BISHOP], a [ORIGINAL CHARACTER] from [THE VAMPIRE DIARIES]. They are [TWENTY FOUR] years old, use [HE/HIM], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here

robbie has only been here for about two days.

what is your character's job

nothing currently, but he'll most likely open up another shop like the one he had back home.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

from after his death - tho he has no idea he's actually dead.

has any magic affected your character

nope!

and any other information you might find useful for us and the other members to know!!

OKAY hello, sit down bcs this is gonna be a wild ride hehe !

his full name is robert, but he goes exclusively by robbie - Robert is only for the parents when he's done something wrong lol, which was most of his childhood and teenage years

third oldest of the siblings

back home he ran a bakery with his wife, they're both witches and they sold the typical shit you'd find in a tourist shop - the whole love potion thing etc, etc - do they work? who knows (most of them do)

was a very curious and rambunctious child growing up, never without scraped knees or holes in his clothes from climbing trees or doing other things that he shouldn't

def a rebel of a teenager - protesting about civil rights and using magic to make things happen in favour of the different causes he was supporting

has def been arrested more than once (more like 10 times but shhh we're not counting hehe)

robbie loves his family with a deep ferocity, he'd quite literally do anything for them - has probs started fights on behalf of them before tbh

met his soon to be wife one day while he was out causing trouble and the two became friends and eventually started dating -

they had the baby first and then decided to get married lmaooo, always does things backwards -

meeting his wife def calmed down the wild streak in him, made him more balanced and so did becoming a father, they have a house away from the bishop home, a dog named tater and plans for another baby (but we know how that went lmaoooo)

the connection for his wife will be something that I'll be writing up very shortly and sending it to the main, so if ur interested in bein his wife pls hmu and i can give you the vibes :)))

we all know the details abt the bishops - they're another gemini coven, marley and mason were supposed to merge nd shit and mason went blabbing to the wrong people - aka vampires who wanted to fuck up the family

and fuck them up they did :((( the bishops all went for what they thought was a normal family night, but nope, the vampires killed them all

robbie's wife and child were supposed to be there with him that night, but the kiddo had a fever and was fussy so they stayed home while robbie went to see his fam

so - I'm playing him rn as him just remembering going home - no remembering death or anything like that - so which family member is gonna break the good news?? hehe

here in dc

robbie is going to be very confused and think that one of his family members has done a spell and it's backfired

will 100% not be able to cope with the fact that he's supposed to be dead - esp given the fact his family was supposed to join them, so they would have been dead too

is gonna need someone to show him around and tell him abt technology and shit ???? so pls give this man some friends hehe

wanted connections

his wife - gonna make this an official wc, BUT if anyone is interested and wants to hmu before i send it in, yall can dm me on discord or even on tumblr!!

friends - all of his friends were back home, so it would be good for him to have some new friends - witchy friends, just normal friends, other supernatural friends?????

people who work for him - robbie is gonna be opening up his shop again here, so if you wanna work in a quirky lil bakery, have at it !! he'd love to have some other witches and just anyone working tbh!

[monstersliveinthemirror]

My TTPD First Listen Reactions:

1. Fortnight: ~what about your quiet treason~ HAHAH THIS HURTS BECAUSE HE MOVED TO FLORIDA WITH HIS WIFE 😂😭 

2. The tortured poets department: I definitely feel like I would like this more if I was stoned rn. ~who's gonna know you like me!!!!!~ ~sometimes I wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me~

3. My boy only breaks his favorite toys: the delusion of "I'll tell you that he runs because he loves me" okay 😭😭 he saw forever so he smashed it up in ONCE I FIX ME HE'S GONNA MISS ME ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

4. Down bad: what an accurate break up song lmao. ~fuck you if I can't have us~

5. So long London: "and I'm pissed off you let me give all that youth for free" yeah fuck me spending my 20s in love with you 😡😡 

6. But Daddy I love him: I wish I had this song when I was 15 and rebellious also is this song about fucking swifties who lost it when she and Matty were together 

7. Fresh out of the slammer: this song broke me. "All those night she kept me going SWIRLED YOU INTO ALL MY POEMS" 😭. (But also I really am not a fan of the weird beat change toward the end??)

8. Florida!!!: fuck me up Florida fr. I think this might be my favorite??

9. Guilty as sin?: I am going to throw up. They don't know you how you've haunted me so stunningly. I choose you and me, religiously 😭😭😭😭 am I allow to cry????? 

10. Who's afraid of little old me?: this one is gonna have to grow on me, I think. Okay actually now that I'm into it, it's grown on me lmao

11. I can fix him (no really I can): this is...okay. just okay.

12. Loml: literally crying immediately. "I felt a glow like this, never before and never since" 😭 "I felt a hole like this, never before and ever since" 😭😭😭 LOSS OF MY LIFE??? This fuckin broke me.

13. I can do it with a broken heart: holy whiplash. A BOP????? Incredible. Wow. I love this. Thanks for rubbing how much better you are than me in my face Taylor lmao

14. The smallest man who ever lived: verse three makes this song tbh. 

15. The alchemy: aw I miss that happy in love everything is meant to be feeling.

16. Clara Bow: promise to be dazzling (I need a pinky promise emoji) the outro 🥺🥺🥺🥺

----

17. The Black Dog: "and I may never open up the way I did for you" 😭😭😭 holy fuck just break me why don't you. "I still can't believe it" 

18. imgonnagetyouback: Olivia Rodrigo has the chance to do the funniest thing ever here lmaoooo "say you got someone else say I got someone too" wow wow wow PICK YOUR POISON BABE I'M POISON EITHER WAY????!!!!!

19. The Albatross: I don't think I have anymore coherent thoughts right now but I dig it??

20. Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus: cause I wonder will I always wonder????????? 🥺 

21. How did it end? I really wanted to like this one but I'm not there yet lol the tempo is just weird 

22. So high school: this is so cute omg

23. I hate it here: I'm lonely but I'm good I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine.......this place made me feel worthless. It's ok I don't live in Charleston anymore. 

24. thanK you aIME: IMAGINE ANDREA SWIFT HATING YOU I really like this one it's kinda like mean 

25. I look in people's windows: "I'm afflicted by the not knowing" babe me too "does it feel alright to not know me I'm addicted to the "if only"" SCREAMING. 

26. The prophecy: fuck man fuck fuck fuck. 

27. Cassandra: oh this is for the Greek mythology girlies huh? Alright I'm in.

28. Peter: yes babe more piano pls hahah do you know how long it took me to realize this was referencing Peter Pan I'm so dumb 

29. The Bolter: "excellent fun 'til you get to know her" me too.  

30. Robin: this one is really sweet omg

31. The Manuscript: but the story isn't mine anymore 🥺

[mirukosbitchywife]

No more Dora songs so I gotta do this bs now

The Straw Hats as the Hashira (based on personality btw)

Sanemi: Zoro 💀

Obanai: SANJI LMAOOOO (it's the way that sanemi and obanai are canon besties but zoro and sanji are canon frenemies 😭✋🏽)

Mitsuri: Chopper??? 😭✋🏽

Shinobu: Nami cuz yea

They kinda have a similar personality?? (pls tell me you see it)

Giyu: Usopp-

Tengen: DEF FRANKY

Just like- bro

They lwk would be besties

Kyojuro: Luffy

They're both a ray of sunshine

Muichiro: Robin

They're both autistic besties

Gyomei: Jimbei

They both fathers frrr

And poor Brook's left out 😔

He's Kagaya now 👍🏽

okay okay hear me out. switch chopper and robin. LET ME EXPLAIN. i know outwardly they are very different but mitsuri whole thing is trying to find someone to love her as she is, and robins is not dissimilar. of course robin doesn't have the romantic aspect as to what mitsuri is looking for but she is at the end of the day looking for people to love her as she is and are willing to help her and be there for her platonically

also i think chopper and muichiro would be the most similar out of all of the hashira and chopper, they're both babies, i think in an alternate universe muichiro would be a good doctor, they're both silly little guys i adopted etc

i absolutely agree with the rest except maybe giyuu and usopp but also usopp isn't really similar to any of them

i def see it with the nami and shinobu thing, especially during the arlong park arc and before

[hmcbook]

I read a lot of books last year (since I finally had the time yay!) and these are the best ones that I highly recommend:

Six of Crows & Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

We Are Okay by Nina LaCour

Corrag by Susan Fletcher

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

also this though idk if it’s translated at all but it was so good I can’t leave it out:

Anaché by Maria Turtschaninoff

and ofc the best book I read in 2018:

Unknown Soldiers (Tuntematon Sotilas) by Väinö Linna

[ppersonna]

swipe right - jjk | m

“ i wanna ruin our friendship. we should be lovers instead. i don't know how to say this, cause you're really my dearest friend “ - jenny, studio killers

♡ summary-  after a horrible breakup, you sign back up for tinder and ironically match with your best friend, jungkook. a date for fun is harmless, right?

♡ genre- best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, jk is a minecraft streamer, brother namjoon, brother-in-law jimin, namjoon is kind of a himbo stay at home dad ngl, ex-boyfriend seokjin (mentioned but doesnt show up)

♡ word count- 9k

♡ warnings- mentions of a bad breakup (smh seokjin wtf??), penetrative sex, unprotected sex (u know the business folx), oral sex (m receiving), teasing, SO MUCH BODY WORSHIP, jk is a simp, slight dirty talk, lots of just talking during sex yall it happens, creampie, cum play, praise praise body worship praise, did i mention body worship, tit-fucking, cum eating, i think thats all.

♡ a/n - helloooo and thank you for your wait for this fic! i’m so happy its done and i loved writing it! it’s a little bit different feel for my usual style of writing (smut-wise) so please tell me your thoughts! i didn’t use dom/sub themes OR a daddy kink LMAOOOO praise me please. i hope you enjoy!! pls feel free to comment, chat, message, carrier pigeon, email, mail, WHATEVER U WANT, me. i love u babies. thank you to @kimtaehyunq​ for the sexy banner. and for @xjoonchildx @ladyartemesia​ @untaemedqueen​ for the writing support and idea generation. i would be nothing without my council. and thank you to my beta editors @hobi-gif and @ughseoks​ and @hongism​ for the perusal and help in writing this!

Jungkook is the person you call when your world falls apart.

He answers, voice raspy from the late hour, and the second he asks you what’s wrong, the downpour of torrential tears you’ve been holding back finally escapes and you’re sobbing through the phone that you just lost the love of your life—that he left and with little effort on his part, and a lot on yours.

Jungkook listens to you—his heart aching deep in his chest at hearing the utter heartbreak that’s clear in your voice. You’ve never been hurt like this, and he’s desperate to hold you, to make it go away. He wants to drive over to Seokjin’s house and throw a left hook into his stupid, handsome face for making you feel you weren’t worth it.

Because if there’s anything in the world that Jungkook knows, it’s that you’re worth it. You’re worth everything. Add up all the money and all the gold in the entire world, and it still doesn’t meet a fraction of what you’re worth to him.

“Where are you?” He asks as he cradles the phone against one arm and pulls on his jeans.  

You sniffle. “Jungkook, it’s 3 am.”

“So? I was up playing Minecraft,” He lies. “Where are you?”

You can’t help but laugh the tiniest bit, a sliver of warmth wrapping itself around your raw and exposed heart. Like a balm to a flesh wound. It doesn’t heal it, not yet.

“I’m at our park.”

Jungkook smiles as he grips the phone back in his hand. The park. The place you and Jungkook spent your childhood playing make-believe games, and formative teenage years loitering around smoking clove cigarettes to look cool.

“Give me five minutes, okay?”

You nod, even though he can’t see you. 

“Okay.”

Jungkook arrives with two minutes to spare. His beat up Nissan that he insists is “vintage” and “priceless” idles next to you.

He can see you through the darkened glass of your car—your mascara is running down your face, tears streaked through your flawlessly applied makeup.

You still look so beautiful.

And it angers Jungkook that all that time you spent looking good for Seokjin meant nothing to him.

He motions for you to come over, pats the passenger seat next to him and smiles as he watches you open the door and slide into the security of his familiar car.

“You cleaned your car,” you murmur as you notice a severe lack of McDonald’s trash.

He sniffs haughtily. 

“The trash added character.”

Jungkook doesn’t give you a chance to respond. Instead, he’s unbuckling his seatbelt and pulling you as close to him as he can get you. The instant his arms wrap around your body, the floodgates open again and your once-quieted tears turn back into full-fledged sobs.

“I loved him,” you gasp through the pain in your throat.

He rubs your back, pats your hair gently, soothing you the way he has for years now. Through every breakup, through every family fight with your older brother Namjoon, through all the mean girls in high school. Jungkook is the north star—always consistent, always guiding you back to safety.

“I know, babe,” he sighs. “You deserve someone who’s going to treat you right, who’s not just going to give up when things get hard.”

You choke back a cry against his Patagonia hoodie and bury your face further into the crook of his neck. He smells like Old Spice and the shampoo he uses, along with the smell of laundry soap you buy for him—he uses dish soap when he runs out and nearly broke his washing machine last time.

“I thought he was the one. I’m so stupid.”

Jungkook swallows hard. Tonight is about comforting you, not about feeling sorry for himself that you’re his best friend and not his girlfriend. He can’t help but think of what kind of life he would give you. He knows it’s one that wouldn’t end with you crying in a parking lot at 3 AM.

“You’re not stupid, you just loved him. And there’s nothing stupid about loving someone, even if it doesn’t work out,” he sighs as he cradles your head against him. It feels right having you there, pressed up against him and seeking comfort from the solace of his arms.

“Let’s go get a milkshake, yeah?” He asks as you pull your head up and look at him with sad, glassy eyes.

“Yeah,” you nod after a moment of staring.

Jungkook’s eyes sparkle with love, with hope. It makes the desperate, alone feeling inside you—disappear. Jungkook presses a soft kiss to your forehead and then starts the shaky ignition of his car, that takes three cranks of the key before it turns over.

He sends you a look, a laugh evident on your face.

“Don’t even start,” he warns. “The engine is fine.”

“Whatever you say,” you snort as you wipe an errant tear from your face.  

“It’s a certified classic car! I could get millions for this baby!”

As the weeks pass, the pain of losing Seokjin becomes further and further from your mind. You can get through the day without crying anytime you see something that reminds you of him and even start flirting with others without feeling like you’re cheating.

You just still haven’t reached the point where dating someone else even feels possible. You’re terrified of allowing someone close to you, letting them into a place where you’re inviting them to possibly hurt you. You’re not sure your heart is ready for it. 

“I think you’re just scared,” your older brother Namjoon states as he warms up a bottle of milk in boiling water. 

He cradles his new baby in one arm while the other works at the bottle of milk. 

“I’m not scared,” you huff. “I just don’t think it’s the right time.” 

Namjoon sighs and hands the gurgling newborn baby off to you and readies the bottle for you to feed your new niece, Jisoo. 

“Look, Seokjin sucks, okay? I know you two were together for some time, but in the end, he wasn’t the right one for you. There’s someone out there who is the right one for you. You know how many shit frogs I had to kiss before I got my prince?” 

You make a face as you feed Jisoo, who happily sucks and gazes at the lights above. 

“You call Jimin a prince?” 

Namjoon sighs dreamily as he watches the baby and thinks of his husband. 

“The dreamiest prince,” he breathes, eyes closed in bliss. “But back to your problems. I think you should get back out there. Go on some dates, meet some people. No one is telling you to fall in love and get married tomorrow. Just go have some fun.” 

You allow Namjoon’s words to mull through your mind. What could be the harm in joining a few dating sites, perhaps spending some time at the gym or grocery store flirting with someone cute?

“Fine,” you say. “I’ll think about it.” 

“Good. I can’t be the only one giving our parents grand-babies. Soo needs a cousin.” 

You smile down at the tiny bundle in your arms and imagine a future where you have a baby of your own. 

“Okay, I’m not trying to get knocked up, Joon.” 

“Whatever,” he sighs. “Help me choose a wall color for me and Jimin’s new master bathroom.” 

Tinder’s changed since the last time you used it, years ago. It’s gone from any semblance of dating to strictly an app used to get laid. 

It’s discouraging swiping through all the obvious fuckboys. Sure, a quick and easy lay sounds great, but you’re also trying to go out and enjoy real, traditional dates, and it seems none of these guys want to step foot outside of a bedroom. 

The swiping left becomes almost monotonous. You’re sitting on your couch, watching some documentary about serial killers, when a startling profile pops up on your Tinder feed. 

The picture that pops up is... Jungkook. You can’t stop the bubble of laughter that leaps from your chest. His profile is so authentically Jungkook that you’re swiping right before you even know it. 

Your brain doesn’t even comprehend what a match with Jungkook means, really. You’re still laughing as you click on the bubble to message him and send him as many laugh emojis as you can. 

“Hey guys, what’s up, Kookie here with another Let’s Play Minecraft video for ya. Be sure to like and subscribe if you enjoy this kind of content.”

Jungkook’s headset is firmly wrapped around his head, mic next to his mouth and hands at the ready on his mouse and keyboard. He’s set and in the zone. 

The game is well into play when the familiar chime of his phone goes off. It’s a Tinder notification—he can tell by the sound. He can’t help but roll his eyes, wondering what sort of boring conversation he’s meant to have with a girl who will probably ghost him, anyway. 

He lazily lifts his phone and glances at the notification, before dropping it back to the desk. 

His hand freezes on his mouse as he finally comprehends what he just read. 

He just matched with YOU. 

His best friend. 

His secret, lifelong crush. 

He sputters something into the microphone and stops recording his game, wildly grasping for the phone and unlocking it. 

YN: 😂😂😂😂 is your bio a Minecraft pickup line?!

He pauses, attempts to collect his thoughts, before desperately typing on his screen. 

JUNGKOOK: Why? 😉😏 did it work?

You spend the rest of your night jokingly flirting with Jungkook, sending GIFs and emojis in between the silly lines you’re using on each other. 

Right before you’re about to head to sleep, Jungkook sends one last message. 

JUNGKOOK: What if we went on a date lolol. Haha jk. Unless?? 👀👀👀

Your thumbs hover over the keys to your phone. 

A date with Jungkook? Even though you matched with him, you’ve never thought of a date with your childhood best friend. 

YN: alright, it’s only fair since we matched 😝 show me how you treat these tinder ladies

“I have a date with Jungkook tonight,” you tell your brother, Namjoon, over the phone. 

Over the crying of your newborn niece, you hear Namjoon splutter in confusion. 

“You what!?” He nearly screams. “Jeon Jungkook? Like... the annoying kid you’ve been friends with since fourth grade?”

You huff. 

“He’s not annoying! He’s my best friend. We ironically matched on Tinder and… Well, why the fuck not? Nothing serious is going to happen. We’ll go out and have a story to tell about how incompatible we are.”

Namjoon doesn’t reply. Instead, you hear him speak to his husband. 

“She’s going on a date with Jungkook,” he says over the muffle of his hand on the receiver.

There’s a shuffle, and the dulcet voice of your brother-in-law, Jimin, comes over the line. 

“Girl,” he starts. “What the fuck?”

You chuckle as you move about your closet, trying to decide what’s appropriate to wear on a date with your best friend. 

“It’s nothing!” 

“Mm-hmm,” Jimin tuts. “You know the boy is in love with you.” 

“Okay, Chim, you’ve been spending too much time cooped up with my brother. It’s affecting your grip on reality.”

“Sure, honey. I just tell it like it is. Don’t break his heart.” 

You roll your eyes. 

“I won’t break his heart because there’s nothing there, Jimin.”

“I’ll be expecting your call later.”

“Yes, dad. Love you guys.”

“We love you too, sweetheart. But really, don’t break that poor boy’s heart.”

You open your mouth to retort yet another reassurance that there’s nothing to break, but the line goes dead.

“Fucking Jimin,” you mutter as you throw your phone to the bed.

You can’t allow yourself to think that Jungkook might have feelings for you. It’s totally out of the questions. He’s your best friend. The guy who shoves Cheetos up his nose to make you laugh and falls asleep during every movie night with his face in the popcorn bowl. He’s just Jungkook. This date is just a funny way to hang out.

So, why do you care so much about what you wear?

You’re still standing in front of your closet, attempting to find something respectable to wear. It doesn’t matter that the last time Jungkook saw you; it was with mascara streaming down your face and a hoodie from Namjoon’s college swimming days and ripped leggings. Jungkook has seen you in nearly everything you wear, so your indecisiveness gives you pause.

Do you want Jungkook to be attracted to you? Do you want to do your best to look as presentable as you would for a normal date?

The thudding of your heart tells you that maybe you’re more interested in this being a date than you’re allowing yourself to believe.

You shake all thoughts off. 

No, you won’t allow yourself to overthink a night that should just be fun.

You settle for a fitted and simple summer dress, tights and heels. Simple, easy, respectable but also showing enough cleavage and sculpt of your ass to ensure you look more dressed up than not.

Perfect.

With one last look in the mirror, you’re ready.

JUNGKOOK: I’m outside!

ME: See you soon!

Jungkook taps his foot anxiously as he sits on the bench outside your apartment. His tight black jeans feel like a second skin on his legs, and the black button-down shirt he’s tucked in makes him rethink his choice of outfit.

Is he too casual?

He’s never really worn something like this around you. This is what Jungkook wears when he wants to seduce. This is what every girl he’s desperately wished was you got to see. The girls who swooned over his messy hair, the way his jeans display his toned thighs, the peek of skin at his throat.

Maybe it’s too much.

Maybe he’s afraid he’ll scare you away.

Maybe he’s afraid you won’t like it.

He’s given no chance to ruminate anymore because you’re exiting the building and walking straight towards him.

He doesn’t think he remembers how to breathe.

It’s as if you walk towards him in slow motion. Angels chorus around him and the setting sun sparkles on your face like a spotlight. There’s nothing in the world anymore, nothing but you.

You’re the most beautiful human he’s ever seen in his life.

“Hi,” you smile as you approach him.

He continues to stare, eyes traveling over the soft curves of your cheeks and jaw, trailing down to the way your dress clings just right to each dip of your body. His throat goes dry.

You are without a doubt the girl of his dreams. 

“Jungkook?”

It pushes him out of his reverie, eyes widening as he realizes he’s been staring at you for maybe a few minutes too long to play off as normal.

“Hey!” He coughs, attempting to right himself.

“You okay?” You ask, eyebrow lifted in concern.

“Yeah! Yup! Totally! I’m okay—a-okay, absolutely great.” He internally slaps himself.

“You clean up nice,” you smile as your eyes elevate up and down the lean form of his body.

“Oh?” He asks, taken aback. 

In his daze, he never even realized what you’re thinking about him, rather only how intensely he was thinking about you.

“This must be the Jungkook that all the girls in college couldn’t stop begging me to hook them up with.”

His cheeks flame with sudden embarrassment, hand moving to the back of his neck to rub it awkwardly. 

“Ha, yeah,” he swallows. “You look r-really nice too. I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress since your brother’s wedding.”

The smile that he’s rewarded with nearly knocks him on his ass. “Thanks! It’s fun to dress up cute again. Jin hated this dress.”

A stab of pain eeks its way into Jungkook’s heart. Seokjin. God, how he hates that man.

“Well, uh, you can wear whatever you want with me!” He assures. 

You loop your arm around Jungkook’s, saddling up to his side as you look at him expectantly.

“Well, are we going?”

Jungkook can’t help but smile at the sparkle in your eye, the way you peer up at him with those soft, cherry lips. He wants to capture them with his own, kiss you until you don’t remember Seokjin’s name ever again.

But he resists.

“Let’s go!”

You never thought you’d admit it to yourself. You never even thought it could happen. 

But the date is everything you’ve ever wanted, and more. 

Jungkook is still Jungkook, still just as silly and easy to talk to as he always is. 

But he’s also charming. Flirtatious, even. He holds doors open for you; he rests his hand on the small of your back as he guides you towards your table at dinner. He feeds you bites of his dessert and lets his eyes linger on the way your lips look wrapped around his fork. 

Jungkook treats you the way you’ve always wanted to be treated. Like someone he wants to cherish for the rest of your combined lives. Someone he wants to take care of, build a future with, enjoy life with.

And as much as it thrills you, it absolutely frightens you. 

It’s when you’re walking down the small river trail together that Jungkook slips his hand into yours and laces your fingers together. The once-steady beat of your heart becomes erratic. He continues chatting—as if holding your hand was a subconscious act for him. He’s knee deep in a story of his Minecraft server when you stop walking, causing him to pause. 

“What’s up?” He asks curiously. 

Your eyes glitter with anticipation, with fear, as you stare at the gorgeous man before you. He looks like a full course meal in his tight jeans and he makes you feel like a princess. You can suddenly see doing life by his side—no longer his platonic best friend, but as his lover and lifelong partner. 

You say nothing. Instead, you simply close the space between you two by grabbing the buttons of his shirt and tugging his lips onto yours. 

“Wha—oh, mmmmmm.”

Jungkook is still for a second as he battles the surprise, but jumps into action and cups your face with his hands, deepening the kiss by pushing his tongue past your lips and swirling it around your own. 

Your bodies press close together. He can feel your breasts against his chest and he desperately wants to rip the dress off your body and worship you like he’s always wanted to. 

As soon as the kiss started, it’s over. You’re pulling away with eyes wide with fear.

“I’m sorry, I—I need to go,” you stammer awkwardly.

Jungkook’s heart drops to his stomach.

“What? We were going to get ice cream?”

You can feel tears building in the corners of your eyes. You’re so confused, so unsure of what you’re feeling. You want to stay and kiss Jungkook until you’re clawing at the clothing on his body, pressing kisses to the firm column of his neck. You want to run far away, too scared to admit it to him you’re sure you could love him for the rest of his life.

You can’t lose that friendship. You can’t risk everything you love about Jungkook. He’ll only hurt you the way every boyfriend ever has.

“I don’t really feel well,” you swallow hard as you lie. Jungkook always knows when you’re lying.

His body stiffens.

“Okay, let me walk you home.”

You shake your head, already moving away from the man.

“It’s fine. We’re nearby. I’ll just run or something.”

He opens his mouth to protest, but you’ve already turned face and started running the direction away from him.

Jungkook watches, misty-eyed, as the girl of his dreams runs further and further away from him.

You’re sobbing as you finally reach home, out of breath and confused. The phone call to Namjoon is quick.

“Yo,” he says cooly as he answers the phone. His tone changes when he hears your whimpering sobs on the other end.

“Joonie,” you whisper. “I fucked up.”

“Oh god,” Namjoon quickly shuffles and calls his husband over, before putting the phone on speaker.

“What’s happened, baby?” Jimin’s sweet voice asks.

“I—I kissed him,” you sob, holding yourself close in the comfort of the elevator. 

Namjoon and Jimin look at each other with knowing looks.

“We’re on our way over.”

Jimin knows the first order of business is to stop the crying. He places sleeping baby Jisoo in your arms, which quiets your whimpers enough as you cling to the tiny baby. He knows your weakness is sleeping babies.

Namjoon looks on anxiously, hates seeing his little sister upset and with no way to make it better.

Jimin’s been asked to take the lead on this, because he knows his husband's response is to cry as well—he gets emotional anytime he sees her cry. Namjoon agreed, knowing Jimin was better suited for the conversation.

“Tell us what happened,” Jimin asks quietly. You’re rocking the baby gently, sobs turned to sniffles. “Did something go wrong on the date?”

Your eyes peer up at your brother-in-law’s, a wounded look that makes Jimin feel sad. Namjoon clenches beside him, and Jimin lays a hand on his lap to soothe the protective brother.

“No,” you whisper. “That’s the thing. It was an amazing date.”

Jimin watches you curiously, but remains silent to let you continue.

“We had dinner, and we played arcade games and we walked around. And he was so… fuck, he was perfect. It was like dating the guy of my dreams.”

Jimin nods knowingly.

“And it surprised you how much you liked him.”

“Yeah,” you sniffle. “At the end, he was holding my hand and just talking about normal, stupid Jungkook shit, but this time it felt like more. Like, I felt in my heart that I wanted to be the one he always talked to about it. I wanted to be the one he came home to at night.”

Jimin pats your cheek lovingly, the care for his sister-in-law clear in his gaze. 

“You don’t just like him, honey. I think you might even love him.”  

You pull baby Jisoo tighter into your grasp and nod, pathetic tears slipping down your face. 

“I just left him. Like, I ran away from him like an asshole.”

Namjoon grunts and takes a spot next to Jimin. “If he loves you, which I’m sure he does, he’ll still be waiting for you.”

Jimin nods and rests a hand on his husband's back. “But you better have one hell of an apology.”

Jungkook doesn’t answer your phone calls. He doesn’t respond to your texts, snapchats or Instagram DM’s. He doesn’t even look at the TikToks you sent him! It’s becoming infuriating to get in touch with him.

You take matters into your own hands and storm to his apartment after work, the rising tension in your shoulders and stomach full of rocks an indicator of your anxiety about the future of this relationship.

Jungkook opens the door wearing nothing but a pair of grey sweats. All the carefully crafted words exit your mind at light 

speed and you’re left gasping, wide-eyed at the chiseled body of your best friend.

“Can I help you?” He asks, tone flat.

Ouch.

You push past him into the apartment you know so well. “Yeah, you could start by answering your phone.”

Jungkook rolls his eyes and closes the door, then heads back towards the large gaming setup in the living room.

“My apologies for not responding to the girl who literally ran away from me on a date.”

Your cheeks heat uncomfortably as you stand in the center of his living room, arms crossed over your chest. 

“Jungkook, listen. I’m—”

“Please,” he shakes his head as he sits down at the impressive gaming chair. “Save the apologies. I get it.”

“You don’t get it!” You say, exasperated. “You don’t get any of it! That’s why I’m here.”

Jungkook narrows a look at you then stands from his chair. Slowly, he makes his way towards you and stands inches from your face. The proximity of his bare, toned chest to your body makes your throat dry.

“No, you don’t get it.” His voice is threateningly quiet, completely different from his usual chipper tone. 

“Jungkook, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” He quirks his head sarcastically, and you’re struck by the sharp lines of his jaw. “Sorry for running away from the date? Sorry for going on a date? Sorry for making me feel like I had a fucking chance when you kissed me?”

You swallow hard and open your mouth to reply, but he cuts you off.

“I’m sorry too. For giving myself way too much hope that this could ever be something. I’m sorry for myself for thinking you’d at least respect me enough to reject me politely.”

“You always had a chance!” You can feel tears building in your eyes and Jungkook feels his heart pound in his chest like a drum.

He scoffs, a harsh and mirthless laugh. “Clearly not.”

“I just—,” you start. “I never saw you like that before and suddenly you became everything I’ve ever dreamed of. It was like getting hit by a train, Kook! Suddenly my best friend turned into the man of my dreams.”

He shakes his head, stepping back away from you.

“I really find it hard to believe you,” he whispers. “I can’t let myself hope.”

“Jungkook, please,” you beg as tears start slipping down your face. “Please believe me.”

“Just leave,” he sighs. “I hate making you cry.”

You want so badly to wrap yourself in his arms, cry into his chest like you always do when you’re hurt. But you stand still, frozen in your shame and embarrassment of hurting your best friend so badly.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur, before you spin around as quickly as you can and leave Jungkook’s apartment in a flurry.

He watches as the door slams behind you, eyes full of sadness and regret. As much as he wants to believe you, have faith in every word you said, he can’t allow himself to get his hopes up again.

He can’t watch you run away from him again.

“Welcome back to Kookie’s Wild Weekly Walkthrough!” Jungkook cheers as enthusiastically as he can through his microphone. “The weekly segment where I react to your Minecraft worlds!”

Jungkook needed to dive back into streaming to take his mind off of you. He hasn’t left his apartment in days, only subsisting on takeout and coffee. At least he was making more money and his subscribers didn’t seem to mind the up-tick in content.

“Tonight I’ll be walking through a creation sent by,” he squints at the username. “‘Kookiesgal95’ Aww that’s cute.”  

He readies the content and starts his camera as he watches the YouTube link. His subscribers love his reaction videos—it’s a highly requested segment.

The video starts off easily, a generic Minecraft world that looks like a park.

“Hi Kook.”

The voice that reverberates through his headphones makes him pause the video quickly, wide-eyed with recognition.

It’s you. He’d know that voice from a million others. 

Shit. He’s going to have to edit so much of this clip. He’s staring at the screen as if he’s just seen a ghost.

Unsteadily, he clicks play again and watches as you lead him through your Minecraft creation.

“I wanted to recreate something for someone very special in my life.”

Jungkook doesn’t even bother to react to this anymore. This entire video is going to be worthless—there’s nothing he can say.

The video pans around the Minecraft setup and he can see what looks like handmade swings and merry go rounds.

“It took me a really long time to do this and an embarrassing amount of help from some twelve-year-olds on the internet.”

He laughs and is stunned by the wet tears rolling down his cheeks. He hadn’t realized he was crying.

“I re-created a park that is really special to my best friend and I.”

He feels his chest tighten and relax. The park. 

“This is the spot where he held me when my dog died when I was nine. I still miss that dog.”

The view is on a spot next to a blocky oak tree. Jungkook remembers that day, remembers your heartbroken sobs as he whispered words of comfort to you. He misses that dog, too. 

“This is where he and my brother got in a fight when we were eleven, because my brother called me a stupid-head. My best friend has always been protective of me, even from my own big brother.”

He can still remember pushing Namjoon around after hearing him call you names. He pushed Namjoon over and threatened to use his “big muscles” if he did it again.

The camera pans to an enormous structure, rather sloppily made, of a slide and monkey bars.

“This is where we first shared a joint in high school. I coughed a lung up and he ran down the street to a gas station at ten pm to get me a bottle of water even though I told him I was okay,”

The memory of the bewildered 7-11 employee plays through his mind. The man watched as a very stoned, very out of breath, Jungkook paid for a bottle of water in coins.

The video continues playing, moves towards what appears to be a parking lot made of cobblestone blocks.

“This is where he held me when my world fell apart.”

The break-up. The way you cried and cried and cried in his arms and he held you as if you were the only thing left on Earth. 

“This is where he reminded me I’m worthy of love, that I’m not broken. This is where he held me like I was delicate, but treated me like I was unbreakable.”

His tears don’t stop. Jungkook feels his heart thundering in his chest like a summer storm. 

He can hear your sniffles through the recording of the video—you were crying too. It pans around to the swing set.

“And this is where I’ll tell him everything, tonight. Where I’ll tell him how deeply I love him and how I want to make him the happiest guy in the world. In all of Minecraft and beyond. I hope he comes.”

Jungkook doesn’t even bother turning his camera off.

Instead, he’s running to change out of his three-day-old clothes and bolt out the door.

The creaky, rusty metal of the swing set is deafeningly loud in the silence of your park.

It’s dark, just a few street lights around to illuminate the perimeter, but it’s otherwise only lit by the moon.

It’s getting cold. You shiver in your hoodie and kick at the dirt under your swing. 

Maybe he didn’t see the video. Maybe he wasn’t going to show.

Maybe it was too late.

You spent hours working on the Minecraft world, staying up at all hours of the night to build and craft a poor re-creation of this park. The twelve-year-olds on Reddit had been invaluable and Namjoon definitely made fun of you for your creative assistants. But it had all been worth it. 

“Fuck,” you speak out loud to no one, as you try to warm your hands in the pockets of your sweater. “It’s cold.”

“You should have brought a jacket.”

The sudden voice from behind startles you. You hop off the swing and whip around to face  down the intruder.

Jungkook.

He looks so good. He’s wearing a thick coat and tight jeans. Your eyes take a delicious journey from head to toe.

He can’t help but preen at your blatant appreciation. He enjoys knowing you’re attracted to him, at least physically.

“You came.”

He nods and takes a nervous step towards you. He’s still far away, more than an arm's-reach away. You’re desperate to bring him closer, to pull him tight against your body and wrap yourself around him. You never want to be without his gentle touch again.

“I felt pretty compelled to come after you made all this in Minecraft for me.” He cracks a wry smile, a boy-ish grin that makes your heart flutter.

“It took me twenty-five hours and some teenagers to help.”

He laughs, a beautiful sound that warms you. “I’m sure they were ecstatic to help.”

You chew at the inside of your cheek, nervous at what he thinks about your in-game confession.

“Did you mean it?” He asks. He steps closer—one more step.

“Every word.”

His eyes are searching yours for the truth, desperately diving into the depths for validity.

“Why did you run away?” Another step.

You swallow hard, heavy tears brimming in your eyes.

“You went from being the silly best friend to being the person I could spend the rest of my life with. It all hit me. It’s always been you.”

One more step and now he’s just within your reach. If you stuck your hand out, your fingers would graze the soft puff of his coat, the delicate skin of his neck. 

“I’ve always felt that way about you. I never thought you’d feel the same.”

You smile softly, timidly. “It just took me a little while longer to realize it.”

All at once, Jungkook closes the gap and holds you gently by your cheeks. His thumbs wipe at the moisture under your eyes. 

“I promise to never make you cry again,” he whispers reverently. 

“And I promise to never run away from you again.” 

Jungkook smiles at that, cradling your face like you’re the most expensive and precious jewel. 

“Can I kiss you again?” He asks, somewhat unsure of himself. 

“I would like it if you would.”

As Jungkook presses his cold, plush lips to your own, you make a promise to yourself to never go a day without kissing him again. 

“I can’t believe you’re in my bedroom,” Jungkook murmurs as he kisses at your face. After the park, Jungkook loaded you into his priceless Nissan and scurried home. You could hardly keep your hands off him as he drove you back to his place—reaching and caressing the spots on his body you’re dying to become familiar with. 

“I’ve been in your bedroom before,” you remind him as he tugs up the hoodie you’re wearing. 

“God, don’t be so semantic when I’m trying to fuck you,” he says before throwing the hoodie to a corner of the room. “You know what I mean.”

Jungkook kisses you again, all lips and teeth and tongue. He kisses you like you’re the last breath of air, and he’s greedy for every bit. He grips your hips, not too tight, and brings your body against his. You can feel him grow in hardness in his too tight, and it feels like bliss. 

Teasingly, you grind your hips against his, making him shudder with desire.

“I want you,” he whines as he nibbles at your lip. 

“Really? I couldn’t tell.”

He opens his eyes to level a look at you, pulling his mouth away from yours. 

“You’re such a little smartass.”

His hands become feverish on your jeans, tugging apart the button and flicking down the fly. He pushes them down quickly, and you kick them off carelessly. 

He can’t stop looking at you in your bra and panties, standing at the foot of his bed. 

“Holy shit, okay, this is happening, right? Like, this is real?” 

You smirk, pleased with Jungkook’s obvious excitement. 

“Let me prove it’s not just a dream.” 

Softly, you spin Jungkook around and push him down to sit on his bed. He complies easily, eyes wide and excited. 

“If this is a dream, would you be able to feel this?” You ask as you unbuckle  his belt and open his jeans. He doesn’t reply, simply watches you as you tug his jeans down to his thighs. 

His cock strains hard against his tight boxers, and you run a teasing finger over the obvious bulge. 

“Oh fuck,” he breathes. 

“Feels pretty real, huh?”

“Y-yeah.” 

Your delicate hands gently tug at the waistband of his boxers and easily work them down enough to free the length of his cock. It springs out easily and your eyes widen at the impressive size. You assumed he would be at least average, but you’re looking at something definitely more. 

“Oh wow,” you whisper. “You’re fucking huge.” 

Jungkook grins. “All for you, baby.” The cockiness is palpable. 

One solid grip around him wipes the presumptuous smile off his face, replaced with a gasping, shuddering moan. 

“How about this? Not a dream?”

He struggles to find his voice, instead he’s gulping for air like a fish out of water. 

“That’s what I thought,” you whisper before settling into a position on your knees. “I’ll admit, I’ve dreamt about this too. I always felt so ashamed for dreaming about sucking my best friend's cock.”

You press soft kisses to the head of his length, teasing the sensitive areas at the tip before kissing up and down the length. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

His evident desire for you encourages you, and your tongue swipes at the crown of his tip and swirls around it gently. 

“Oh my god.” His eyes shutter closed and you trace the veins in his dick with your tongue. 

“This h-has to be a dreeeaaaaam,” he whines as you make an exceptionally long stripe with the flat of your tongue. 

You pull off for a moment, humming. He springs his eyes open and watches as you reach behind your back and unsnap your bra. Your breasts escape with a bounce and his eyes widen, nearly bulging out of their sockets. 

“What the fuck,” he whines. “You have the most amazing tits.”

He reaches out to grasp them and you slap them away playfully. 

“Not yet,” you smirk. “Still trying to convince you you’re not asleep.” 

He sucks in his breath and puts his hands back to the bed to steady himself, eyes never leaving yours (except to stare at the luscious curves of your body). 

Grasping your breasts in both hands, you smash them together lightly in an elaborate show of what Jungkook wants most. You lean over his body and place the throbbing thickness of his cock in between your tits, allowing him to feel just how soft and warm they are. 

“Shit!” He yelps, grabbing his sheets in a tight fist. “Are you really tit-fucking me right now?!”

Slowly, you lift your body up and down, allowing his cock to feel each stroke of your breasts. You nod at his question and continue to pump up and down. 

“Still dreaming?” 

He whines and shakes his head, already feeling so close to the edge. His cock is slick from your teasing licks and the pressure of your tits surrounding him had his mind spinning with desire. 

“Ahhh, I’m so fucking close,” he warns.

You continue, speeding up the friction and pressure of your strokes. 

“I want you to cum on me, Kook,” you whisper encouragingly. “Cum on my tits, please?”

Jungkook feels like he’s a wire about to snap, and your thick, sultry voice and incredibly perfect breasts are the snips that breaks him apart. 

“Oh, shit,” he grunts. “Gonna paint your titties white, baby.”

His moans echo around the walls of his bedroom, small gasps of pleasure and your name escaping his perfectly plump pout. 

His hot load splatters on your chest, and you stroke him through each pulse of his cock. You’re slippery with his seed now, and when you pull away from his spent length, you make a show of rubbing in his cum over your chest.

“Okay, definitely not dreaming,” he says in a daze as he watches you lift a wet finger to your mouth, popping it in to clean it off. “Who knew you were so fucking kinky?” 

His confidence grows as he catches his breath. He can’t believe he’s sitting on his bed with you on your knees, breasts covered in his load. You’re suckling the cum off your finger like it’s his cock, and he’s desperate for more.

“There are lots of things you don’t know about me,” you shrug. 

Swiftly, he grabs you gently by your bicep and pulls you close, sucking at your lips until you’re both standing. 

“I plan to find out everything.” 

Suddenly, you’re switching positions and Jungkook is pushing you down into the bed. You lay flat in the center, body relaxed and eager for your best friend.

“What are you doing?” You ask. He’s still standing at the end of the bed, watching you get comfortable. Once he’s satisfied that you’re lying exactly how you want, he settles himself by your feet.

“Worshipping you,” he says as he lifts an ankle and presses gentle kisses to your calf. “Showing you how much I adore you.” More kisses, soft and sweet. “Showing you how I plan on treating you for the rest of your life.” 

He takes his time, lavishing your legs with his mouth. He kisses and sucks at any spot, sexual or not. He mouths at the roundness of your knees, your firm hamstrings. He presses his love into the skin of your thighs, mouthing his praises with each kiss. 

He reaches the dip of your hips and he gently kisses your exposed skin as he tugs your cotton panties off you. 

“I have loved every inch of you since before I can remember,” he praises as his lips skim over the mound of your cunt. “And I don’t plan on stopping soon.” 

Your body feels like it’s on fire, as if Jungkook lights a match at every spot his lips press against. Your eyes close, and you allow Jungkook to continue his pious worship of your body. 

He teases around your folds, kissing your labia ever so gently—making you gasp. He doesn’t linger long, only kisses you enough to stir the licking flames of heat in your belly.  

He kisses at your stomach, gently nibbling and laving at the softness there. You try to hide from him, try to hide your insecurities of your body in his thorough exploration, but he moves your hands. 

“I know you don’t like this part of your body,” he murmurs. His voice is so soft, so pure and sincere. “But I do. I love everything about you.” 

His tongue swirls around your belly button, making you gasp at the ticklish sensation. 

“You’re so pretty. So perfect.” 

He continues upwards, lips now trailing to your full breasts. He takes his time there, licking and kissing and flicking at your nipples with his tongue. It feels exhilarating—Jungkook’s mouth feels like everything you want it to feel like. His tongue is warm, and he bites with just enough pressure to make your back arch off the bed into his embrace.

His hands explore, taking stock of every millimeter of skin he can find. He wants to memorize every freckle, every bump, every scar and line. Your body is his paradise, and all he can think of is you, you, you.

One hand travels down your body as he moves his lips up your neck. It snakes down your stomach and deftly slides over your soaked core. You whine as you feel his fingers part your folds and dip into the wetness.

“So wet,” he says out loud, verbalizing every tantalizing detail of your body. “So perfect.”

His lips are finally at your own and you kiss him passionately, tongue swirling around his as he slides his two fingers past your clit and into your drenched hole. You gasp against his mouth, eyes widening as he slowly scissors his fingers into you and pumps slowly. It’s almost teasing, the way he fucks his fingers in you. Slow, firm movements with his powerful hands.

“Jungkook!” You gasp. He doesn’t reply, instead he bites at your lip and tugs, then trails his hot mouth back down to your nipples. He can’t get enough of your breasts and the slightly salty taste of him still lingering.

“You feel so good,” he says as he speeds his fingers up minutely. “So tight and wet for me.”

Your hips writhe in need. He’s giving you what you need, but not enough. You need more, more. You want to feel him, all of him, spearing you open.

“Please, Kook,” you groan. “I need you.”

He laughs softly against your nipple and sucks extra hard, letting it pop out of his mouth audibly.

“And I need you, my love.”

“Fuck me, please.” You’re desperate, thighs quaking from the slow teasing. “I want you to fuck me, Jungkook.”

Chills shudder down Jungkook’s spine and he’s powerless to say no, not when you demand it so well.

“With pleasure,” he agrees. He pulls his fingers from within you and copies your move, sliding them into his mouth to suck your essence off. 

He’s never looked sexier. His eyes are dark chocolate pools of burning intensity, and you feel your breath become shaky as you watch him clean his fingers with precision.

After he’s deemed his fingers sufficiently clean, he settles himself between your legs. Easily, he lifts your hips and shoves a pillow underneath, elevating you to a more comfortable position. He grabs your legs and tosses each over his shoulders so they’re higher in the air. 

“I’m going to fuck you so good, baby,” he promises as he rubs the tip of his cock on your soppy slit. “Condom?”

You shake your head, appreciative of his question but desperate to feel him completely.

“Birth control. Regularly tested. Haven’t had sex in a while,” you blurt out. “You good?”

He nods in agreement. “Same. Well, except the birth control. But, I’d take it if they made it for men.”

“Jungkook!” You whine. Your best friend is so easily sidetracked. “Please, can you fuck me?”

He grins. “Tsk, someone is impatient.”

A low moan is rumbling in your chest as he continues to rub his thick cock at your entrance.

“I swear to god, you’re the biggest tease.”

“Oh, I’m definitely the biggest.”

Before you can react, he’s pushing past your entrance and sliding deep in your walls. Your position makes his cock feel deep, and he bottoms out and stills there, eyes closed in bliss.

“Holy shit,” he gasps. “This is absolutely the best pussy I’ve ever felt.”

You wiggle your hips as you get used to the sensation of the delicious stretch.

“Please don’t tell me how many pussies you’ve felt when you’re balls deep inside of me.”

Jungkook turns his head and kisses at your legs resting on his shoulders, lavishing them with his praise once more as he keeps his cock buried inside your tight heat.

“Yours is the only one that matters. The only pussy I’ll ever be in for the rest of my life.”

“That’s a good answer,” you smile. “Now, fuck me, lover boy.”

Jungkook winks and grips your hips with his hands. He swiftly pulls out, enamored with the way his cock is already covered in your creamy essence, then eagerly pushes back in. He sets a pace and soon the sound of skin clapping on skin echoes around the room.

“Oh god!” You’re moaning loudly, unabashedly. You’re thankful that Jungkook’s old roommate, Yoongi, moved out to live with his boyfriend Hoseok months ago. He’d definitely complain about the noise for months. “Fuck, Jungkook, you feel so good.”

Jungkook fucks into you with ferocity, speed and power gradually rising as he feels his core tighten with the coming anticipation of release.

“Mmm, you look so fucking sexy like this,” he murmurs. “Getting fucked by your best friend’s fat cock.”

He moves a hand from your hip, trails it up your body to squeeze at your breast, before he’s cupping your face once again. His hips snap against yours and he loves the way your mouth utters little squeaks and gasps with each deep thrust into you.

“God, my beautiful girl,” he groans. “Can’t wait to cum in this pussy, shit, you got me so fucking close.”

You open your mouth desperately and Jungkook easily slips his thumb in. You latch on quickly and suck, tongue swirling around the tip like you’re sucking another cock. It nearly sends him over the edge and the speed of his hips matches his desperate need for more.

“Fucking hell,” he bites back. He can feel his belly tighten, driven further and further to the edge by the constricting wetness of your cunt. 

He pulls his thumb out and moves it down to where his cock spears into you, allowing your spit to swirl with his thumb around your clit. Your core tightens around him at the added stimulation and your back arches up in ecstasy.

“I’m so c-close, Kook,” you plead, as if begging for mercy. “Please, I want to cum so bad.”

The speed of his thumb increases, and he watches as your face twists in pleasure and desperation. 

“Cum on my cock, baby, let me see you fall apart. Show me what I’ve dreamt of for so long.”

A high and wanton cry ripples out of your body as he savagely increases his speed, both his cock and thumb working overtime to drive you towards your end. The butterflies that erupt in your lower stomach make your moans louder, higher. You’re so close, closer than ever. It’s building to an incredible crescendo.

He can tell you’re close—he sees it on your face as your back arches and your fists grip his sheets.

“You look like a fucking angel, baby,” he whines as he soaks in the vision of you writhing underneath him. “I bet you cum like an angel, too. Let me see it, let me see.”

With just a few more swirls of his thumb and his deep, hard strokes, you’re soaring over the edge into a pool of nothingness. Your cunt pulsates wildly around his length, milking and stroking it with your tight walls. You throw your head back, moaning out his name at the top of his lungs, letting his neighbors know just who fucks you so well.

“Holy shit,” he gasps, hips stuttering as he fucks into your juicy hole. “That was so fucking sexy.”

You grip his forearms, holding onto him tight and encourage him to go harder. “Cum inside me, Kookie, please. I’m all yours, make me yours.”

His heart feels like it might burst in his chest. He’s always wanted you to say it to him, to hand over your love to him like he does so easily to you. It’s all so much, so overwhelming, and the feeling of your hot cunt still fluttering around him sends him reeling into his own completion. 

He spills into you, warm seed coating your walls and pooling inside your womb. He fucks himself through each throb of his cock until he’s sure he’s drained every ounce of himself into you.

Your legs slip off his shoulders easily, and he gently pulls himself out of you. He falls beside you, panting with exertion, and wraps an arm around you.

After a few silent moments of catching your breath, Jungkook pulls you in close to him until he can koala-cling to you, arms and legs both wrapped around your body.

“Mine,” he whispers as he kisses your head. “All mine.”

You return the favor, clinging to your best friend—boyfriend—like he’s your only lifeline.

“All yours.”

“So, you’re telling me, you got together because of Minecraft?” Jimin asks, pointing a fork in your direction. It’s been months now since your grand virtual declaration of love for Jungkook. Months of bliss and romance, laughter and companionship. 

You were right all along. Jungkook is everything you’ve wanted in a man and more.

You’re sitting at your brother’s expensive dinner table, enjoying a meal with his family with your boyfriend at your side.

“Yeah, Jimin, I guess that’s what I’m saying,” you retort as you roll your eyes. “Minecraft and Tinder.”

Baby Jisoo is awake and in your brother’s arms, but she’s whining and wiggling to leave him.

“What’s wrong, Soo?” Namjoon asks with a pout on his lips. “Why don’t you want daddy anymore?”

Jimin snorts at his husband and you hold out your arms for your baby niece. “Come here, baby, I know you want auntie.”

Namjoon dutifully hands over his daughter, sulking that he’s been picked over for his sister. 

You cradle the baby in your arms, expecting her to calm once she’s there, but she continues to fuss. She’s thrusting her arms out and nearly crying, reaching towards Jungkook who’s busy chowing down on Jimin’s homemade ramen.

“I think she wants you, Kook,” you murmur. He looks at you, then to the baby, then back to you, before he wipes his hands and face clean with a napkin.

“Oh, okay,” he whispers, slowly taking the baby from your arms with your help. “Hello, ma’am.”

Namjoon and Jimin laugh. “She’s a baby, Jungkook, not an elderly woman,” your brother teases.

Jungkook doesn’t listen. He’s too busy cooing at the baby in his arms and playing with her tiny hands. Namjoon turns his attention away and looks at you.

“Guess I won’t be the only provider of grandchildren for much longer.”

You playfully glare at him and turn away to watch your boyfriend. Watching Jungkook interact with your niece makes your heart swell, your soul sing. He’d be a perfect father.

“I swear, if he teaches her how to play Minecraft, he’s banned from the household,” Jimin grumbles. “This is a No-Nerd-Zone.”

Jungkook cradles the child and rocks back and forth, singing her a soft, made-up song, before he looks over at you.

“Hey, I want one of these,” he smiles. “Can we have one?”

You lay a hand on your stomach, a soft bump not quite visible yet. It’s only been one test, the lines faintly indicating ‘positive’ on the stick. You wanted to make sure, get confirmation before you spill the beans.

“Sure, Kookie.”

He grins and leans over to kiss you, before turning his attention back to the baby. “Okay, Jisoo, now let me tell you all about the Endermen.”

Jimin groans. “Oh my god, do not give Minecraft facts to my infant!”

tag list - @giadalin @nohayarcoirissintormenta @pjmislovely @xhazmania @marcoazam2 @eggbutnotyolk @feel-the-sunset @unicornbabylover @aretha170 @jeonmisha @hordanhearsawhooo 

© ppersonna - 2021 - do not repost on any site, or translate without express permission from author.

[ennoshawty]

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

[bellarosethefangirl]

Okay I'm kinda dumb at these things so I hope I did this right lol.

For your match up could I have

Tarot card, Love fortune and Perfume (Moonlight Stars)

1. Female, she/her

2. Kinda average height, 155cm,

3. Could I get a male match up pls

4. 20s

5. Awww perfect guy would be smart, kinda stoic, but can be soft with their partner, someone who has a good, commanding presence, a person who makes me feel safe, taller than I am, is driven and has goals. I like blondes (lmaoooo) it's just a nice contrast with my dark hair and skin lolol.

6. Roses

7. Kira and the pillarmen lol idk I just didn't feel it

8. I don't mind villians,

9. JJBA vento aureo and Toyko Revengers

Thanks for doing this amazing event and happy birthday once again.

Fortune Teller Match Maker 🔮 Anime Matchups 💘

Don’t worry Bri you did everything correctly, thanks for the happy birthday! ❤️ I decided to do Tokyo Revengers because I wanted to see who I'd pair you with for your matchup. Hope its a welcomed surprise. I also thank you for sending in a matchup.

Tokyo Revengers

Upon making your final decision for Abella's offer you tell her what you desire. She looks excited for your first request, it being one of her most popular readings. She goes to her table cleaning it off in a matter of seconds. A small pink cloud surrounds it and her belongings on the table disappeared. She has you sit on the stack of square shaped cushions while she is seated on an orange stool.

“You wish for a tarot card reading? How romantic this will be! I’ll get my deck out!” Abella waves her hand filled with rings. Her bangles jingle as her hand swipes across the table revealing a long line of cards.

The tarot cards are pink with white designs. She holds up a hand signaling two fingers for the number of cards she wants you to choose.

“I need you to pick two cards.”

You do as she says and the other cards disappear and reappear in her hands. She shuffles them but this time her cards are glowing pink. The painted hearts underneath her eyes are also glowing. She points a pink polished finger and the cards surround the both of you. They float in the air effortlessly in a slow vortex.

“For true romance to be I’ll need to know who your true love is. Pick one card but be sure to pick the one that calls to you. Be true to your beloved by following your heart.”

The cards fly to the table lining up neatly in front of you. You do as Abella says and follow your heart. You hover your hand over several cards until you get a warm feeling deep in your heart. You choose a card and it begins glowing. The other cards return to Abella’s side in a small stack.

“You did so well. Now let’s set your cards down on the table.”

One card is glowing pink while the other two look normal. Abella hovers her hand over the glowing card, closing her eyes. The hearts underneath her eyes glow again, but this time a huge rose shaped magic marking surrounds you two on the ground. You look around as both of your long locks of dark hair float gently off your shoulders.

"I'll start by revealing your true love."

Your brown eyes follow Abella's to the card. It's now glowing white. Abella waves her hand across it, causing it to spin. When she has her hand gently cupped over it, the card stops spinning. Her hand is back at her side and you now see an image of a male in the card. He's blonde with long hair and has a thin braid. Most of his head is shaved and he has a tattoo of a dragon on it, he's wearing small hoop earrings. His eyes are dark and he has a stoic expression.

"I see.. Your true love is a man by the name of Ken Ryuguji, he also goes by Draken."

Abella's eyes are closed, she is focusing. She then opens her eyes with a smile.

"He is smart, strong, protective, is driven, has goals, he is pretty respectful and encourages people to do the right thing. He's also a very caring individual to those he cares for. However he is vice president of a gang, his authority is equal to his leader. Quite a dangerous lifestyle but he's strong enough to handle it.”

Abella looks back over to you noting how surprised you are being paired with an individual in a gang. His occupation surprises you but his personality too. You're happy he is showing attractive qualities in his personality.

"I see he possessives qualities you're attracted to in an individual. He'd be a good partner though he isn't good with expressing his feelings, he's good at showing it through his actions. You and Draken will have a romance that will slowly grow into a very loving relationship.

You take in all her words with a smile forming on your face. So much information is given you in mere minutes. As you're collecting your thoughts Abella flips over another card. It isn't glowing like the last card did but it does reveal a pink image of a king holding a sword while seated on his throne.

"The king of swords, in love this card means that your true love is someone serious about love, plays by the rules, and has a lot to offer you, however they ask for a big return. They need to know you will be there, even if they're absent for much of the relationship. This card also means it could refer to a long distance relationship, communication will be through other means. Rest assured because Draken will continuously visit when he can and he will be sure to contact you."

You're quiet as Abella flips the other card, she knows you're still collecting your thoughts. The next card is a goblet with a large hand holding it, its overfilling with water and a bird is above it.

"Ace of cups narrates a new relationship filled with both excitement and happiness. The type of love you experience with butterflies in your stomach and the desire to spend every waking minute with your new love. I believe this refers to the part of the relationship when you're both apart in the beginning but have no fear your partner will want to hear your voice and contact you often."

The fortune teller looks over to you with a look of joy. She knows the relationship you'd have with Draken would be loving. Your own brown eyes light up.

"Now that I've given you a tarot card reading what else can I help you with?" She says while making her deck of cards disappear.

"A love fortune would be nice too."

"A love fortune? This will be very romantic because I'll be sure to tell you more about the future and relationship if you pursue it."

Abella snaps her fingers and her hot pink crystal ball appears on the center of the table. Her shawl hangs off of her arms as she begins your fortune. The crystal ball starts glowing a light pink. She closes her eyes and the hearts under her long lashes glow too. You notice a pink rose shaped symbol on the ground surrounding you both. Abella opens one glittery eyelid, holding out her hand to you. 

“To get a proper reading of your beloved and your path with them I’ll need to hold your hand, but if it makes you uncomfortable I’ll simply place my hand on top of your own.”

You comply and hold out your hand to her. She closes her eye and focus' again. You felt comforted by her hand because your body felt like it would fall without the contact. Almost as if you'd get hurt letting go of her hand as she does your reading.

“From what my crystal ball is showing me your relationship will gradually build.. it will be filled with happiness but also have its ups and downs. Draken is a busy individual and you must be understanding that you won’t always see him. However once he knows that you’re very understanding you two will become closer and form an emotional bond before you know it. Once this emotional bond is formed you both will find eternal happiness through this sweet yet trusting relationship you both will share.”

You tell Abella your thoughts and she smiles. The fortune teller waves her hand and the crystal ball is no longer glowing. It reverts back to hot pink and the rose symbol on the ground disappears.

"How else may I help you?"

You point out the tiny perfumes lined up against the wall. Abella goes over to her shelf and asks you to pick one. You choose the blue and purple one that glimmers like the moonlight. The lid looks similar to a diamond.

"An excellent perfume! This one is called, moonlight stars."

"What does it do?"

"All it takes is two sprays, anymore won't cause any affects but the smell is strong. This perfume will motivate your true love to spend the day with you, I assure you it leads to romance but you must prove to the individual you would be a good partner."

You blush at the thought but are sure to remember her words. Abella then stood up and gestured you to follow her. She seems to be excited.

"Now that you know the path that lies ahead for your true love, I think now is the time to put it to use. Please use the perfume, I know it will lead to your best future with your darling. However if it doesn't work out don't be disheartened. Love takes time too, good luck."

Understanding her words you're now spraying yourself with the perfume given to you. It smells of violets, with hint of lotus blossom, and a bit like the beach. It brought comfort due to making you have a sense of nostalgia from being around friends after a long day spent at nightfall. There is no other way to explain such a feeling, it waved through your very being as if trying to give you warmth on the inside. It's reflecting off the lights in the room, reminding you of the stars under the moonlight. Abella closes her eyes and the hearts on her face glow a pink, the rose symbol appears around you two and at the center a white portal appears.

"Your true love resides in this portal, hope all goes well." She hugs you before you enter the portal.

You blink and your eyes adjust to the dark city night. Looking around you're in the empty streets. All is calm until you hear a deep voice calling for someone.

"Mikey! Mikey where are you?!" The voice yells in an annoyed tone.

You turn to see Draken down the street from you. Your eyes widen at seeing the real deal. He's tall and wearing his dark gang uniform. You're not sure how to interact with him until you feel someone tug your arm roughly. You turn to see another gang member but his uniform looks nothing like Draken's. You make a nervous expression. He can tell you're frightened but before you say a word, another hand gently pulls you away. It was Draken. He pulls you behind him.

"Leave her alone." He said sternly. "It's obvious she isn't interested."

He is very intimidating, his presence alone made you a bit nervous. You thought back to how Abella described him. You're also thankful he got involved. The other person scoffed and walked away, muttering how it wasn't worth it getting in a fight against the likes of Draken. The tall blonde had a bored expression but he's thankful he didn't have to fight him since he wasn't interested. He knew one kick is all it would've took.

"You should head home. It's dangerous for you to be at this side of town at night." He looks incredibly confused since you're small and beautiful. "Would you like me to walk you home?"

Your dark eyes widen at his offer but you agree. You wonder how this night will end with him or perhaps you might bump into him again. You walk beside him, guiding him.

"Thank you." You then introduce yourself.

"The name is Draken." He nods.

You two get into small talk as you walk. He's calm but also respectful to you. A very clear contrast to how he spoke earlier. His presence still gives you an air of intimidation. You look at his uniform noting the symbol. Since he's part of a gang it makes sense he would need to be intimidating. Draken thought it was nice how you weren't judgmental since its obvious he's in a gang. He can tell you're very grateful to him. A fact he's smiling about.

A group of gang members recognize Draken and decide to take him head on. There is three of them but he doesn't seem affected by their challenge. In fact he welcomes it. You notice he looks excited. You stood in the background watching as he threw them effortlessly. His kicks are so powerful, it's no wonder he knocked them out. You became worried when one of them brought out a weapon and attacked him with the broken metal pipe. You gasped the minute he was hit. You tried figuring out how you could help him. He looks annoyed and begins dodging the next attack with ease. You notice a beer bottle and decide to use it to get it in his opponents eyes.

Thankfully your idea worked and the male is screaming and cussing in pain. Draken punches him across the face leaving a black eye behind. He immediately fell unconscious. The blonde turns to you so he can thank you. You mention how it's the least you can do for him.

Draken is more than thankful because you went out of your way to help him. Now that he is more focused on you he gets a better look at you. Your expression on your tanned features is so soft and you seem worried for his well being. He is looking upon you with a soft expression of his own, admiring your beauty. He smells your perfume and it gives him a sense of comfort and relaxation. He forgets about Mikey and decides to ask you on a date.

You're surprised but agree to it. You felt safe with him. You're secretly thanking Abella in your head. You follow him and notice he is leading you to the beach. There is no way he will hold your hand but he does seem pleased with this result of having you as a date. You smile up at him in return. You have more discussion until you're standing at the center of the beach. It becomes late and Draken realizes he left Mikey back in the city.

"Shit...!" He utters to himself.

"Is something wrong?"

"I forgot my friend back in the city. I need to get back."

"I understand. We both better head back."

You lose your footing forgetting you're standing on sand. Your smaller frame lands on top of Draken who also loses his balance. He falls backwards with you landing on top of him. You get a bit embarrassed and apologize.

"Watch your step next time." He says dramatically.

You say not a word realizing the position you're both in. Your small hands are on his chest, your face is directly in front of his. His dark eyes are looking into your own. His eyes widen since he's faced with your beautiful features illuminated by the moonlight. It almost looks as though you're wearing highlighter on your natural blush. Your cheek bones are accentuated, drawing his attention to your eyes. Your eyes reflect the starry night, causing him to become stunned by your beauty. Soon you both lean in. As you're both doing so he places his hand on your small back. He loves how your tanned hands slide to his shoulders. The kiss felt so sudden but natural as well. You begin blushing. When you separate he is smiling at you.

"I want to see you again. Tomorrow can you meet me here again? It will be during the day this time. I want to spend the whole day with you."

You immediately agree, expressing how you look forward to it. He walks you back to a safe area in the city. He bids you a farewell with a kiss to your forehead. He tore a piece of paper from his pocket and hands it to you. It's his number. You touch your forehead remembering how his hand felt in your dark hair.

You decide to head back to Abella to thank her. Her tent should be in the same location. When you arrive it seems to be relaxing, no customers so far. It's late so it's understandable. Thankfully Abella is still open.

"Nice to see you again! How did it go?" She welcomes you in, having you seated on the square shaped cushions again.

You tell her how you ended up on a date with Draken and were promised another date with him. Abella's eyes widen with delight.

"Such wonderful news. I knew it was meant to be! You know I sense his desire to protect you and how his appreciation for you is equal to your own for him. Do remember my words about the relationship and how he wants someone understanding. To be able to form a relationship with Draken means to give all communication and care. Something tells me you understand a bit based on the date you had."

You agree with her and explain how nice it was spending time with Draken. Abella is overjoyed for you. She stood up to grab an item from the back of her tent. She is headed toward a planter. She picks a flower and holds it up for you. It's a single coral colored rose.

"This rose is a present for you, friend. Always remember true love is a path of understanding and trust. Draken will prove to be a very caring partner. I wish you the best in the trials of your love."

You grab the rose and thank her again for everything. She hugs you before you leave her tent. Abella smiles fondly knowing the meaning behind the rose given to you. How it means desire but also enthusiasm. She gifted it to you due to the enthusiasm for the new relationship and happiness it will bring you. The desire is the love you and Draken deeply long for.

[koulakoukoula2003]

Tagged!

Thank you sooooo much @jayteacups for tagging me!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

Rating nicknames/pet names in reader-insert fics: (I've added some commentary too, I hope it's okay!)

mommy/daddy: no to mommy, 100/10 YES TO DADDY LMFAO

darling: 10/10 yes pls I beg, Erwin would DEFINITELY call you that. And every other character that gives off the 'traditional' kinda lover, they will 100% use darling on you whether you like it or not, they're trying their best ok

slut/whore: yes daddy pls LMAO 100/10 I'm a masochistic bitch ofc I like it -> Levi would def call you that and so many other hot characters pls

baby: meh meh I'd say a 5/10, it's not that I don't like it. It's cute af, but if we're talking about self-insert, I would not make the kinda character who wants to be babied by their love interest so I avoid using it or use it very rarely. I guess it depends on the reader/OC.

love: hmmmm ok I guess 7/10? It's a classic, I can already imagine a handful of fictional crushes of mine that would use that BUT only when it's used nicely. For example, if you want Levi to call you 'love' you're gonna have to write 500k words before gettng to that LMAO or at least imply that Levi and reader have some history

bae: uh no pls that's the pet name that the fuckboy of the class would use on you in case you're his gf (rip to u) so 0/10 lmao

kitten: welllllllll if it's smut, sure sure sureeeee 8/10

puppy: .....you're gonna make me expose myself LMAO 10/10 jndhfjfjjk im outta here

cow: LMAO WHO USES THAT 0/10

bunny: ooohhh okay well if it's smut then 7/10

princess: a VERY daddy/mommy character would call you that so YES PLS 10/10

sweetie: yes pls it's a classic adorable pls pls pls 10/10 (Erwin would 100% call you that)

sweetheart: SAME HERE 10/10

dear: I mean if you're going for age-difference (always within the legal ages pls + daddy erwin would def use that on you) THEN YES PLS 8/10

honey: cute and perfect for a regular scene 9/10

baby girl: let's pretend that 365 days never happened, and in that case, YES, PLS this is also perfect for a daddy character LMAO can't stop thinking about a certain someone can you tell 9/10

sweet thing: depends on the context 6/10

gorgeous: this is a pet name that's great for regular scenes, sooooo meh meh meh I don't find it as the ideal compliment. Surely it's cute and nice and stuff, but being called pretty is far inferior to being called smart and since this is self-insert we're talking about then 2/10

little mouse: weird, I've never seen this before lmaoooo uhm ok I guess 5/10

pretty girl: ok I know I said being called pretty isn't very important to me but if it is smut.... ooooffff plsssss siiiiirrr 100/10

A/N: I'm sooooo sorry I haven't posted anything new recently, I have so many amazing asks and I wanna thank you all for that. I have closed my inbox because I want to catch up to the asks I already have and once I finish with them I'mma definitely open it again.

Thank you so much for reading! I will be posting something spicy within the day (considering uni assignments don't kill me till then) AHAHAHA

taglist: @syrma-sensei @antoxsmith @macyomoiji@hopeless-daydream3r @killerbananas and basically, whoever else read this tag, you're welcome to do it yourself!

[baekhvuns]

Bestie I'm gonna send you another ask later to briefly talk about my fan call, because I'm dying of fever (Hwa's effect?) let me just say I felt like shit (I still do obviously), but he made my morning so much better, he also teared up a bit 😭 and loooked so so pretty, but what's new. I was like "pls let him change, not the MuCore outfit" it was distracting 🥴

Lmaoooo 12 points is better than the infamous 0 jshdhshshsgshsgs. Because MuCore is more difficult to win I was once again robbed of Lino x Ateez interactions, Jungwoo too, I wanted to see Hongjoong and Yeosang with him again :/ Skz doesn't attend The Show, so no MC Yeo x Skz moments either :(

Yes Soshi showcase was so fun, I didn't watch the whole thing, but it made me emooooo. Agreed, the song is simple in quite boring way, but anyways at least it's not unlistenable! I hoped the MV would be more interesting though. I've ordered their albums and the packaging especially of the Deluxe edition is so pretty!

Right I'm afraid of the ads, because it's too good to be true seriously 😭

Can't wait to exist in your universe as a fursona who wants to bite Seonghwa

Noddy always seemed like a boy name to me, I met two people with pets named Noddy too and they were boys... poor animals

I'm really lucky when it comes to kpop albums, but that's about it sjsuiamasbhsshbs. Now when I think about it I remember some Ateez members telling me to hydrate, because it was hot and I was like "yeah, ok" like a liar <3

EXCUSE ME WHAT ENDING?! Nvm I don't need that villain fic idc bring the cute runner Hwa one 🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂

Ngl I only listened to SuperM songs a few times, cause I was so pissed at SM for dragging some of their most talented people (minus you know who) and giving them an NCT type of track 😭 but yeah some songs are pretty ok

Bestie do not get me started on hwips and hwaist...😳 hegs lmaooo but yeah we love a long boy. I always say it's Hwa's era but tbh how can I not. Mingi has achieved his final for I'm afraid and it's deadly

Lmao now everyone needs to pass the NOSE TEST 🤭

I saw a tweet that said it should be illegal for bad things to happen to Seonghwa - exactly, you're mean to my Seonghwa? Instant death

I support Real Madrid and I know Jongho got me, I also support Arsenal 🥴

I like the changed format of the Showterview, the one with Jessi was based more on shocking behaviour from Jessi, lots of simping and chaos which was fun, but here I feel like we can learn more about them and some questions were 👀

Truly, everywhere I go I see HIM. Everything reminds me of HIM. Not complaining too much, but I would like to be normal for a sec... RIP to your WIPs of other members, but I believe you can fight your Shinestar urges (couldn't be me but good luck!)

Idk if I'm ready to read for anyone that isn't Hwa or someone I stan, but I'll keep that CEO series in mind 👀 anything about uber drivers you recommend?

Holy shit?!?!?! Those beach photos you posted, while I'm a strong MILF Hwa enthusiast he does occasionally look DILFy and that's a good example.

Bestie sometimes my browser marks your quiz links as potential fraud and I'm always like "miss Baek wants to send me a virus" Anyway girl what is this 😭😭😭😭 I got little miss princess, some of the things were accurate, but some 💀 what did you get?

THE MINI LIGHTSABER I'M KMS-ING - DV 💖

hi hello!!

Bestie I'm gonna send you another ask later to briefly talk about my fan call, because I'm dying of fever (Hwa's effect?) let me just say I felt like shit (I still do obviously), but he made my morning so much better, he also teared up a bit 😭 and loooked so so pretty, but what's new. I was like "pls let him change, not the MuCore outfit" it was distracting 🥴

omg of course!! BDMWHDNWHDKW NAUR I HOPE U FEEL GOOD 😭😭😭 he wooed you fr fr,,, OH 😭😭😭 DID U GUYS CRY TOGETHER 😭🤚🏼 IN THE MUCORE FIT??? FUCK BESTIE HOW DID U SURVIVE THAT PLS ARE U OKAY /// ?????

Lmaoooo 12 points is better than the infamous 0 jshdhshshsgshsgs. Because MuCore is more difficult to win I was once again robbed of Lino x Ateez interactions, Jungwoo too, I wanted to see Hongjoong and Yeosang with him again :/ Skz doesn't attend The Show, so no MC Yeo x Skz moments either :(

NO LITERALLY DHDJDJ but he’s so funny 😭😭 NAUR WE COULDVE HAD LINO AND HWA INTERACTION AFTER THEI DATE DURING KINGDOM FBFBFB 😭😭🤚🏼 the only time we get interactions atp is at mama 😭

Yes Soshi showcase was so fun, I didn't watch the whole thing, but it made me emooooo. Agreed, the song is simple in quite boring way, but anyways at least it's not unlistenable! I hoped the MV would be more interesting though. I've ordered their albums and the packaging especially of the Deluxe edition is so pretty!

nO BC CBDBDBD KEY DID IGAB??? yeah! simple but there wasn’t that oomfp in it,,, but when hoyeon said “we are forever” PASSED OUT GIRLIES RLY CAME BACK TO DELIVER WHAT EXACTLY KPOP IS DBDBD but they looked so goof and all!! OH MY U DID?? SHIT I HOPE U PULL A YURI BC SHES SO PRETTY THIS CB 😭😭 personally their holiday album was so nice, with all the memories in it and miss jessica 😵‍💫😵‍💫 the deluxe version is so pretty!!!

Right I'm afraid of the ads, because it's too good to be true seriously 😭

no literally im afraid they’ll take it down one day and i’ll mourn so bad 😭😭 like with no ads?? how’s that even possible??? and crisp video quality??? 😮‍💨😮‍💨

Can't wait to exist in your universe as a fursona who wants to bite Seonghwa

FURSONA IM SCREAMINGDNDJDJD DV ANON FURRY CONFIRMED AFTER ALL

Noddy always seemed like a boy name to me, I met two people with pets named Noddy too and they were boys... poor animals

poor animals inDEED WHO TF NAMES THEIR ANIMALS NODDY??? 😭😭🤚🏼 im so surprised i told my mom noddy was a boy and she gave me stank face dvdbdb

I'm really lucky when it comes to kpop albums, but that's about it sjsuiamasbhsshbs. Now when I think about it I remember some Ateez members telling me to hydrate, because it was hot and I was like "yeah, ok" like a liar <3

no u are so very lucky!!!! aS YOU SHOULD,,, HELP THTBRNDH THEY TOLD U TO HYDRATE AND U DIDNT 🔫🔫 😭😭😭😭 YOU LIAR FBFBFBFB

EXCUSE ME WHAT ENDING?! Nvm I don't need that villain fic idc bring the cute runner Hwa one 🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂

WHO WILL DIE WHO WILL LIVE THATS SOLELY UP TO MY BRAIN ATM FBFB pls enjoy the ending <3 i have started witting the first part of it on the side!!

Ngl I only listened to SuperM songs a few times, cause I was so pissed at SM for dragging some of their most talented people (minus you know who) and giving them an NCT type of track 😭 but yeah some songs are pretty ok

yeah!! tbh i kinda liked the concept bc it was rly cool seeing a mega group to be formed but everyone hated it 😭🤚🏼 HDJDJD YEAH THE NCT TITLE TRACKS DBD tiger inside was rly good!!

Bestie do not get me started on hwips and hwaist...😳 hegs lmaooo but yeah we love a long boy. I always say it's Hwa's era but tbh how can I not. Mingi has achieved his final for I'm afraid and it's deadly

HWIPS??? IN DEJA VU??? MAAM. FIRST THE NOSE. NOW THE HWIPS DONT DO THIS TO ME IM WRITING A YUNHO FIC I CANNOT GO WRITE A HWA ONEFBFBFB

Lmao now everyone needs to pass the NOSE TEST 🤭

FBWNBDKW DID U SEE HIS NOSE AT THE FANSIGN IM ASSUMING ☺️☺️

I saw a tweet that said it should be illegal for bad things to happen to Seonghwa - exactly, you're mean to my Seonghwa? Instant death /// I support Real Madrid and I know Jongho got me, I also support Arsenal 🥴

THAT IS SO TRUE NOTHING BAD SHOULD EVER HAPPEN TO HIM NUH UH shinestar’s will put instant death fbdbdb 😭😭😭 oHHHHH MADRID DBDB IM W MANCHESTER UNITED

I like the changed format of the Showterview, the one with Jessi was based more on shocking behaviour from Jessi, lots of simping and chaos which was fun, but here I feel like we can learn more about them and some questions were 👀

actually you’re so right this one seems a bit more laid back and comfy than jessi’s,,, NO UR SO RIGHT ON THAT !!! oh some of them questions that one that yunho didnt answer 😀😀

Truly, everywhere I go I see HIM. Everything reminds me of HIM. Not complaining too much, but I would like to be normal for a sec... RIP to your WIPs of other members, but I believe you can fight your Shinestar urges (couldn't be me but good luck!) /// Idk if I'm ready to read for anyone that isn't Hwa or someone I stan, but I'll keep that CEO series in mind 👀 anything about uber drivers you recommend?

RIP TO MY WIPS BC I MADE ANOTHER WIP FOR HIM TODAY 😭😭😭😭😭😭📉📉 “but I believe you can fight your Shinestar urges (couldn't be me but good luck!)” LMFAOOOO EHQJEJWHDEJ everywhere it’s Him every time i see a group photo of ateez my eyes??? immediately on seonghwa 🔫 OH PLS DO READ IT ITS QUITE GOOD !!! here’s your daily uber driver recs ☺️☺️ do u perhaps fancy a uber driver who models?? or a ceo?

Holy shit?!?!?! Those beach photos you posted, while I'm a strong MILF Hwa enthusiast he does occasionally look DILFy and that's a good example.

SOMEONE SAID THAT PHOTO SET REMINDS THEM OF DIVORCE HWA THE HUSBANDY LOOK 😭😭😭 I CANNOT ANYMORE FBWMFBWK

Bestie sometimes my browser marks your quiz links as potential fraud and I'm always like "miss Baek wants to send me a virus" Anyway girl what is this 😭😭😭😭 I got little miss princess, some of the things were accurate, but some 💀 what did you get? /// THE MINI LIGHTSABER I'M KMS-ING - DV 💖

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭😭 OTS ACTUALLY ME TRYING TO GET UR PCS NOT FRAUD fhwkdhek I got

Art Bitch <3

You probably love to create things, art, clothes, films, books, etc etc. You hide behind all the things you make, you look for a escape in these things, you were probably the art or book kid growing up. You probably used art/books to get away from the things going around you, to bring yourself into a new world. You never grew out of this "phase", you probably want to be a writer, director, artist, etc etc when you grow up even if people tell you to get a real job, you probably felt left out during elementary career day because they never had creative jobs just firefighters and cops. Your favorite class is probably art or creative writing/english, you haven't found your people yet. But someday you will be surrounded with people that KNOW you, and it's going to be the best feeling ever. And you are going to never want to let those people go, keep making your art, share it with the world or keep it to yourself, its your art, your stories, and how ever looks/reads it is going to love it! I believe in you, and I'm proud of you.

🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ ???

IM YELLING THIS IS SO TRUE

is this your type of stompers

[wolkoshka]

reviewing jujutsu kaisen since i just finished the anime last night and let me just SAYH

it's amazing???

GOJO????? ill get into him a bit later tho

his 3 dumb students??? who, in all seriousness, are so well fleshed out?

yujis trauma of witnessing his grandfather pass away right in front of him & thus making sure that his last words were not in vain & he'd do justice by them like ur a kid relax BUT NO he'll eat a dirty finger if necessary

while everyone's making sure the success of the mission, our boi is here breaking down bcs some of the curses turned out to be human

like

it's so satisfying to see that on screen yes show me ur moral compass 🧭 stay true to ur characterization ur doing wonderful

why is he so fast someone EXPLAIH N

megumi????? AND HIS HAND SIGNS?? (($;_;;;*;*+7*++_+##+_++_+##

by FAR one of the hottest things ive seen so far

🖖🤛🐺 🐺 🐺 👐🦅🦅🦅 RIP

his hair

someone tell him saloons exist

him holding back his potential but then going fuck it and summoning his own domain????

we love character development ☺️

i have so many good things to say about this good bad boii bitch we RECOMMEND

NOBARA

BITCH

UM

ive waited SO LONG for a female lead character to not get lost in the aggravating trope of basically becoming the third wheel of a 3-member group *cough* sakura *cough* orihime *cough* not spitting any fire but they had held so much potential and the creators basically went 🥱🥱

BUT NOT IN THIS HOUSE

the way she works SO WELL and so so EFFECTIVELY with the team?? With YUJIII???? ESPECIALLY WHEN THEYRE FIGHTING THOSE TWO BROTHER CURSES!! THEY WAY SHE HOLDS HER OWN

THIS IS ALL GONNA BE IN CAPS NOW

BCS

I FELT THE TEAMWORK I FELT WHERE THEY STOOD IN EACH OTHERS' LIVES I FELT THE WHOLESOMENESS THE CAPABILITY THE POTENTIAL THE HEART THE POWERRR OF THE TEAM BCS OUR BAD BITCH HERE REFUSED TO BE STEREOTYPED

all the women in jujutsu kaisen

ALL OF THEM

so well written and fleshed out they're given their strengths as well as their weaknesses, their story as well as their matching personalities, the role they contribute to the anime and it's story as well as their own short individual arcs (and by short, i mean like literally 2min clips of their past but such significant moments u immediately feel where they come from so kudos to the writer WELL PORTRAYED)

it was such a breath of fresh air honestly

gojo

GO

JO

PLE A SE I-

LIKE DADDY chill

WHY IS HE SO POWERFUL????

WHO ALLOWED HIM TO HAVE SO MUCH CONFIDENCE?????

AND WHYYY DOES HE SIT LIKE THAT???????????

BUT AM I MAD 💢😡 ?!?!?!?!!

id let this guy mansplain manspread manipulate manage manhandle me SO FAST😤😤😩😩

he's basically that overpowered, overwhelmingly significant character in a story but it's executed so perfectly that im not even upset i demand more of his single-celled dumb ass

oh U can shoot weird purple curse balls stand on the neck of really powerful curses defeat any enemy break barriers threaten the elders & still look undefeatable?? we STAN

he owned every scene he was in ngl wish he owned me 2 tho i wanna get trapped in his infinity ♾️ bro pls

me tastin' that dick

him basically adopting megumi and raising him i-

him lowkey threatening to slaughter the entire upper echelon of his community bcs the student he's known for like a day died for 2 secs

he's the most powerful jujutsu sorcerer alive but everyone who knows him or has ever met him (nanami) is like pls just

there's so much to appreciate

Nanami boi im

i want him to ratio this body to find the quickest way to orgasm bcs-

KINNNG 👑

lowkey ship him with that baker girl

the notion of Sebastian Stan and Jennifer Lawrence existing in the same universe as jujutsu kaisen is wild to me but godmn hilarious

the blonde girl on her broomstick likes the winter soldier lmaoooo same

"what's your type of woman?" BRUUZEEEEEER

Todo was such a wholesome character

👏 that curse 👏 thick boiiii 👏

OKAY SO some things about CERTAIN technicalities regarding techniques

I think my ONLY issue in the anime is that the power of ones Curse is never really explained properly

How do they develop different kinds

Where does it originate from

How are some people born with curse energies and some arent

Like yuji learns them on the spot and it's a bit jarring bcs as the viewers we're still learning the extent and classes of curses and curse users AND JUST NEW ABILITIES KEEP POPPIN UP all, "there's this cool trick did u know about it?" oh and for the sake of the plot, "i can now totally do this" (ones domain becoming weak from exterior force acting upon it rather than an interior force acting upon it from within) a convenience that popped out of nowhere it makes sense, but wish abilities were explained better, so the build up is more rewarding? the black flash for example, with yujis powerful ability coupled with his curse dragging a split moment behind his initial attack, shouldnt he already be accessing the point-break of his attack colliding with the curse energy of his foe? what i didn't understand is, does one have to focus on that point of collision for it to activate and force ones energy into it? I DONT GET IT I SWEAR IM NOT DUMB unless it's been explained and i completely missed it

Gojos infinity ♾️ I love it but why can't others use the same technique? Or is it only singular to Gojo, bcs if so, it's never really said? How does one just .. create new abilities like that

The students are in high school but there aren't any classes?? I get the whole on-field, hands-on lessons/missions to get recommended and move to higher grades, but NOTHING ABOUT curses and their history for newbies to learn from?? Alright my bad

that area is still a bit blurry to me but i haven't read the manga and just joined the fandom so i guess ill learn new things as i thirst along or if somebody could PLS explain lmao

OTHER THAN THAT

I loved the animation, it was so fluid and the motions were executed so flawlessly

the action scenes were rewarding and delivered it's intended blows and full of emotion at times that i 🥺🥺

the comedy's everything??? megumi and yujis chemistry was so heartwarming and hilarious GOD don't become enemies/rivals pls lmao SPEAKING OF, the times i thought they would esp when yuji surpasses megumi, the anime takes a whole new approach where there's no enmity just healthy acknowledgement of their friends growth and how focusing on themselves better might help them achieve their own full potential, as seen when megumi activates his shadow domain after an eye-opening talk with gojo

such healthy displays of being teammates

after watching animes where two besties start challenging one another so aggressively after one surpasses them, this was just...we see u and we APPRECIATE

i know u guys know what im talking about when i say WHEN CHARACTERS GET INTO EACH OTHERS' PERSONAL SPACE LIKE THEYRE ALMOST ABOUT TO KISS

I KNOW U GUYS KNOW IM NOT INSANE

the subtlety of the motions, peoples reactive facial expressions, it's just so real??? like,,,, when gojo meets yuji for the first time, as he's talking he gets into yujis personal space all suave and yujis like "omgg im nervous??" 💖

OVERALL

i can't wait for the second season

also WHERES THE MOVIE I WANT TO WATCH THE MOVIE SO BAD BUT ITS NOT AVAILABLE YET????????

the will to survive has never been stronger

wow this was TOO LONG a review but oh well it's one of my FAVS animes now 😤💖