#srry for being salty :(

[b4ll4d33r-06]

KZSCR SHIOPERR SPOTTED WHO BOOKMARKED MY SCARAXIAO FIC. INSERT THAT ONE IMG OF A GUY W A RAID INSECT SPRAY BOTTLE........

[dtkqplusplus]

how does tommy get away with so many gay jokes without being called a queerbaiter

like tommys not a queerbaiter- no real person is. i just want to know what qualifies people for “queerbaiter” like when tommys going “ahah I kissed a man” and making jokes with ranboo all the time how is that any differnet than dnf flirting?

like tommy makes gay jokes a lot, and occasionally he’ll clarify “ya I’m straight lol” and it’s just. hm.

dream and george would flirt a lot, dream USED to say he was straight, and would follow up with “we’re not dating, we don’t plan to, this is just how our friendship works.” but here comes the squawking “queerbaiting queerbaiting squawk”

[streets-in-paradise]

i am back,once again!!

i’m srry i had to

anywayyyyy

okay so i got this idea,could u write about some cute moments between achilles and (fem)reader who loves the beach/anything that has to do w the sea?maybe like a drabble or smth??idk if this is vague but lmk

hahaha, hi!!

( woow, you pick your graphic intros and everything. that shows dedication i love it 💕)

Absolutely, I can do this.

Also, this will be super fitting because, despite the movie left it up to interpretation, his mom is a nereid (greek deity of the sea). When he is not fighting the job of Achilles is beach lol.

It turned out longer than a drabble because I kept thinking on your Achilles x girly/fashionista reader ask from last time and it kinda influencied me into doing a full oneshot mixing bits of both ideas.

Sea lover reader is also a capital city girl moving to Phthia who is quite girly and with a bubbly personality, enjoy <3

The Waves' Caress - Achilles x (Fem) Reader

Warnings: Mention to the sociopolitical things going arround in the Greece of the film ( Agamemnon's imperialism and the big picture civilizatory plan he mentions to Nestor in the scene where he convinces him of calling Achilles through Odysseus.)

Tags: @zoegarfield @lovelybaka

Vocabulary note: Strophion is an ancient times equivalent of a strapless bra, piece of greek clothing that can be imagined to resemble a bathing suit.

A deep love for the sea had allways been a part of you, so wherever fate would take you it was your hope to forever remain near the beach. Movings weren't usual in your life, used as you were to a comfortable lifestye in Mycenae as the daughter of a royal scribe. However, your father was a functionary for an empire in constant expansion. Official scribes were required everywhere to keep registered records and contribute to public order. The pretended civilizatory mission of King Agamemnon counted with that, so it wasn't a great surprise to hear he intended to relocate him on the most conflictive territory of his domains.

Myrmidons had a fame of being the fiercest soldiers of Greece, and his disdain for their strongest local leader was a threat to the very core of the order he intended to establish. Raising the mycenaean presence on the region was his idea to balance things. Populating through migrations of qualified officials and their families was his idea to stabilize politics and he was quite proud of it. So much that he even took the iniciative telling your family about it by himself, never missing the chance of doing awkward jokes only he would find funny.

As he charmingly enlisted the perks of his new position to your father, he punctualized one single downside. With his attention shortly deviated on you, Agamemnon playfully warned him to watch over his beautifull daughter from Achilles and his men.

The attempt of polite praise failed, but you pretended to go on with it to avoid upsetting him. Not surprised, but crushed by the news, all you did was asking if your new home had sight of the sea.

Phthia was a rocky territory where mountains were more abundant than fields, but it also had increíble beaches that became your only comfort in the arrival. As peacefull representatives of an occupation force, your presence was inpopular. Among the multiple functions of scribes there were a few that could be considered benefitial for the community, but your father was also supposed to work with those in charge of keeping track of the taxing.

It was obvious that the king wanted the handfull of new functionaries to handle a situation previous administrators couldn't control efficiently, that you were perfectly fine back in your birth city and adaptation was going to be a struggle.

Feeling more lonely than ever, in a position where you didn't feel comfortable trying to make new friends, all you had were your long walks on the beach.

The caress of the waves was comforting for you, and the salty tears of homesickness felt small mixing in them. Hoping that your sorrow could be temporally washed away, you would often speak out loud as if the forces ruling the water could hear you.

It was about presenting yourself with your fears, your dreads, begging for strenght and bringing small offers so the minor divinities populating those shores would get used to your presence. If mortals weren't going to make you feel welcome for obvious reasons, you could at least develop roots in the land bonding in a spiritual way.

At one given time, you tossed a silver ring for the waves to swallow. A really expensive one that you ripped from your finger with disgust, careless of what your father would say about that. That was your way of showing the local gods that you weren't Interested in the spoiling of their land, and if you had to stay, you wanted to find a spot to belong in doing good.

Lost as you were in your thoughts and prayers, you completely ignored there was a man watching you.

He noticed, and didn't waste time in making you realize of his presence.

" I'm an expert on anger and this doesn't look good. What happened? Did the man who gave it to you failed in behaving as he should? "

You turned back following the sound, only to discover the mesmerizing image of a blond man with piercing blue eyes. Blue as deep as the sea, captivating and haunting. His simple garments, vest and skirt of matching blue tones, made him look like a marine god coming at you.

" There is no man making me suffer other than my king. Unless seaking revenge on his orders, I doubt any myrmidon would want to get close enough for that. "

He smiled with skepticism, almost as if he taunted you.

" I would give you one afternoon in a tavern to prove it wrong. "

You couldn't help smiling and that only encouraged him to get closer pacing calmly in your direction.

" People come and go arround here, but I have a good memory for pretty girls … I guess you must be new. "

The flirting, way faster than what you were used to, was yet consented and very much appreciated. However, you feared the response you had for him would ruin everything.

" My father is the new royal scribe: we just moved and I have nowhere to belong here yet, except for this beach. "

The clarification soften him instead of sending him away.

" I was born here and still belong nowhere, only the sound of the waves bring me clarity. "

That subtle comfort was sweet enough to mean something without breaking the appearance of mightyness.

" I don't seek isolation, but stumble with it for unwillingly representing the evil deeds of Agamemnon. "

He got to close, close enough to smell the scent of your hair mixed with the breeze caressing it.

" I fight his wars, but never do it for him. He is not my king and as long as you are here he doesn't have to be yours either. "

He said enough to be recognized and the name came out softly from your lips.

" Achilles … "

The warrior smirked as a confirmation.

" i have been warned against you: Agamemnon told my father in front of me that you are the doom of every woman. "

Description that had clearly amused him.

" Did you believe it? "

He wanted to know if you were willing to give him a chance of proving himself.

Lost in him as you were, no voice of reason would have made you deny him that.

" It's too early to fall in any assumptions. "

His hands were cassually resting on his hips, eyes glancing at the sea as if he tried to reclaim a lost capacity for keeping distance.

" I come here often, maybe you will find time to form your own perceptions of me. "

An invitation to let him join you that you accepted in a heartbeat. Company was a great improvement and your attraction to him did get you trustfull with ease. The way in which you took his hand in your walk back into the water told him all he needed to know regarding the kind of girl you were.

Bright and pure, so innocent that he was still twirling his mind arround the lively attitude you began to show as fast as you felt safe arround him. There were no traces left of the angry sad girl he reached out to once her loneliness was disrupted.

All smiles for him, even more beautifull than before in his eyes.

More encounters kept happening and the thing wasn't left at random. Since you agreed to see each other with the excuse of your beach walks, the marine wildness became witness of your infatuation.

Without realizing of the meaning in his actions, Achilles began searching for you in every corner of the city hoping to cross ways in the middle of your daily activities. His gaze would search you in the crowds with very little success, making him crave more and more for the next secret meeting.

As most refined girls from the big city, you were one putting great care into your appearance. The pressure for beauty among rich nobles have shaped you that way, but he could tell you were a humble young woman whose harmless vanity couldn't be mistaken for shallowness. You also happened to be very well instructed, prepared to talk of any topic one would bring to you for conversation and always delivering a charming sensitivity into the talk. He sincerely thought you deserved a chance to be loved among his people regardless for the bunch of political servant fools you had arrived with.

Perhaps, because he himself adored you.

With the progression of your meetings evolving into implicit beach dates more surprises kept happening.

Achilles got to find out what that linen dyed of blue he found you buying at the market was for when you showed up one day in a cute match of strophion and skirt that left him breathless.

His blue eyes roamed your figure like the waves's caressing, yet you didn't seem to notice the impact you had on him and quickly ran towards him with your usual lovely carefreeness.

You clinged for a hug rounding his waist with your arms.

" Achilles! Want to go swimming? I came prepared this time. "

The sweetness of your tone made him feel almost guilty for enjoying the moment so much.

" I see, you look like a siren ready to raid the shore. "

The weird compliment made you giggle and excitement pushed you to show off, freeing him to give proper space for him to watch you.

" Do you like it? In Mycenae I used to go swimming with my friends, so my mother allowed me to make a new attire for swimming inspired by the local colour in order to feel more in home … Although I never told her who was my real inspiration."

Your attempt of souding suggestive was too cute and he couldn't resist the tenderness.

" It's perfect, you look so beautifull it's painfull to look at directly … "

Achilles interrupted himself, only to deliver his conclussion in a whisper.

" … And I love knowing you were thinking of me. "

Heat started reaching your face, but you tried to sustain the bravery that got you there.

" I'm always thinking of you. Mother says it seems my head is on some cloud, but in fact it is on the sea. "

Lovefull words started flowing from you with ease simply by staring at him for too long.

" On your eyes, that seem made of it. All its misterious charm compacted in one glance … and I wonder how is that even possible. When we meet, I mistook you for a god of the deepness. An inmortal servant of Poseidon answering my prayers. "

His eyes followed the soft features of your face with discrete adoration.

" You are the miracle I never expected, sweet girl of a love so pure that it's drowning my heart. "

Silently and relentlessly, the few distance between you dissapeared. Achilles held you by the waist and you caressed his cheeks into your first kiss. Although the breeze should have cooled you down, you were feeling your while body on fire and nothing could have stopped it.

As soon as you released each other you made him chase you into the water so the caresses of the waves on your skin would mix with his. Catching you took him a bit because you kept diving away as part of the game, but when he got you in his arms he refused to let you go.

Once you had enough fooling arround, he proved to have one more surprise for you.

His seashell necklace, that he colocated on you after filling the spot with kisses while you were drying together near the shore.

Words weren't enough to thank him, but you tried anyways.

" It's so beautifull! How did you know I wanted one like yours? I was trying to make one myself, but i'm collecting only the prettiest shells I find for it. "

Your reaction caused him a blissfull pride.

" Keep mine, I want you to have it. This way, my men would know you are mine without mycenaeans realizing. A subtle symbol that will make myrmidons respect you. "

The explanation got you even more excited, but you also felt a sudden sense of shame.

" I have nothing to give you in return. "

Achilles chuckled, as if he knew something you didn't.

" Wrong again, pretty one. "

With the cocky comment, he exposed his hand showing off a detail you didn't notice before.

Your silver ring on his finger.

" Impossible! I tossed it away for the deities to take, it should be resting deep in the ocean. "

Achilles enjoyed himself with your child-like amazement.

" Tomorrow, I will take you to see the most beautifull point of our shores. One you don't know yet, where no one dares to go, and there you will meet the one who gave it back to me. "

It confused you even more, but that was understandable.

Achilles was aware you had no idea that you had already won the good sight of his mother with your thoughtfull prayers and sincere love for her essential element.

It was him the one who still had hard work to do in order to charm your parents.

[oohbuggypie]

was playing PO!! Wii with my older sis and she said said something about how Mac is literally just a boy, a guy, a young man .. and it made me think of that meme w the little guy nd his propeller hat / swirly lollipop so i did what was logical

ft. TD Don's lame ass being salty over jolly dudes like Mac

Spanish text reads:

"cual es el problema de este chico"

English translation:

"what's this guy's problem"

srry 4 the wacky looking art guys my motivation is sooo high but as far as things coming out the way i want it too, still in a slump :(( BUT I HOPE THE SILLINESS ADDS 2 IT 🩷

[lovelyminako]

Akanojaku is the worst fr

And I have one scene that explains the big reason I hate him. And it's the scene where he steals Kagura and the MC's wedding ring in an effort to make the MC change his mind.

(Srry for the bad quality, I just had use whatever YouTube video was there)

Akanojaku, you're a fucking weasel. A dumb one at that. What makes you think that she's going to run away with you when she's already made it clear to you that she doesn't want you multiple times? SHE'S GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEONE ELSE! GET OVER HER AND GET A DAMN LIFE WHILE YOU'RE AT IT!

And my next point is what the MC puts into very eloquently.

And finally, after hearing that, he does this very nice and very respectful action.

...

MF actually kisses her without her consent. Just before she's getting married.

This is literal proof that Akanojaku doesn't actually respect the MC. If he did, he wouldn't be committing a crime against her! This MF sees her as nothing more but an object. In his eyes, she's his property, his plaything, his trophy, not a woman or person with emotions with feelings and her own agency.

And I swear, I don't want to hear anyone say "uM hE aCtUalLy lOvEs hEr sO mUcH aNd hE jUsT wAnTs hEr tO dO tHe sAmE" Because that's no excuse. If you love someone, then you want them to be happy. And if Akanojaku actually respected the MC and truly loved her, he'd leave her alone after she has made it abundantly clear she doesn't feel the same. Love is not possessive. And Akanojaku is more possessive than freaking Yuno Gasai.

Cry about it.

First of all, that'd be a selling point, not a detractor.

Second of all, screw you! How'd different would being the god's "sanctified, docile, little pet" be any different from being yours? You literally call her pet! Don't act like you don't do that! Hypocrite.

And of course, you have the option to either slap that mf or to say you love him (for some reason, even though you're getting married.) And because I'm watching a YouTube video, I had the absolute delight of seeing the love option because it's a premium option.

Okay, first of all, I'm not going to ignore that this option is practically emotionally cheating on Kagura. She's literally getting married to someone whilst already having her heart split between two people. And at that, why would you this to Akanojaku of all people? The persistent, arrogant demon who stops at nothing?

And Akanojaku, you're literally so entitled. If she doesn't choose you, she doesn't choose you. End of story. Not that hard to understand. You act like you have ownership over the MC. She can't go with this other man that she loves because she also loves you and you're the one who's important and she has to go with you.

But anyway, the MC goes into how she wants Akanojaku to be happy (even though he's done literally nothing to prove he should be happy). And Akanojaku soon says "Fine." and starts to leave which leads to this.

Nice Guy™. Literally. Woman rejects man, man acts salty about it and acts like a jerk to the woman. Like, I don't think I need to explain why this is bad.

Ugh... And that's the end of the scene..

And people who do like Akanojaku, why the hell do you? I genuinely see no reason to like him other than he's good-looking (and even then, I actually don't find him as so since I don't like muscular men and short hair.) Please explain this.

[domesticangel]

people on fragrantica reviewing womanity by mugler being like “noooo omg don’t listen to the people who say it smells like pussy it doesn’t 🥺🥺🥺 its not salty and metallic it’s sweet and soft and girly and feminineeeeeee🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺” like 1) why are you acting like that would be a bad thing and 2) srry you have boring body chemistry ig but the dry down on me smells like eating overripe fruit by the sea w my whole pussy out (complimentary)

[salt-volk]

"Those of ye whom taketh issue with a relatively low in quantity amount of "feces posts" being published upon the saltvolk tumblr weblog are humorously weak willed in my personal opinion! There have not even been very many of them posted and furthermore there seems to be much the same amount of postings expressing complaints about said "feces posts" as the aforementioned "feces posts" themselves. Ha ha!

Authors postingeth upon this weblog are at times witnessed engaging in negatively toned interactions such as casting insults unto one another or praying eagerly for the demise of the dappervolk website. The common attitude expressed in regard to much posted content is "Ah my dear fellows, this happens to be a weblog of a "salty" nature thus anything goeth in these lands! I plead of thee do not ye censor or complain about the contents posted!". Yet when a few other fellows may merely wish to engage in some harmless comical enjoyment THAT is the behavior which now comes to disturb your delicate sensibilities! Point being that it would almost seem more offence is taken over lighthearted positivity than over some of the harsher contents published onto this sodium weblog. Why cast such judgements upon harmless expressions of joviality when there hath been posted so much worse than they? Why shouldeth it be fine to post anything ones heart may desire only up until their heart desireth posting expressions of lighthearted nature?

Mine deepest condolences that you may occasionally be exposed to "cringe" when these "feces posts" are published alongside the other postings seen upon this weblog, many of which in my opinioneth could also be labeled as "cringe" in their own right (Repetitive argument topics, pointless speculation, exaggeration, falsehoods told merely for dramatics, so on and so foreth. As is common for many weblogs of a similar sodium focused nature). Point here being that it is not as if the content of this weblog is typically of an extremely high quality and entirely lacking in "cringe", thus the occasional publishing of "cringe" does not taint the essence of the weblog in the manner implied by those whom complain of "cringe" being now exposed to them. Exposure to "cringe", boring content, or content produced with low effort on the authors part is certainly not a novel occurrence on this weblog.

It is rather very unfortunate that some individuals sadly seemeth to thrive on negativity to such a degree that they indeed can not stand merely to witness a few harmless jests without hastily morphing this matter into yet another topic of hostility and debate. If this is indeed your feelings then I cast upon ye stay miserable if it is what you so fervently desire! Thou art patently lame, a negative force incapable of finding the value within lighthearted fun much alike in manner to Ebeneezer Scrooge the well known character from Charles Dickens 1843 novela "A Christmas Carol"! I rolleth my eyes at thee, knave!"

ok is tht better fr u? srry if i dnt wanna spend 2 hrs writing proper posts like im doing essays fr class. once school hrs r over im nt proof reading shit n am jst gonna speak in a way thts quick n easier fr my mind lmao. plenty of my friends abreviate when we txt idk y its considered so odd. rlly jst tryin to say dnt b a fun hater theres already enough bad shit so its nice to get a lil break imho. if u dnt like goofs then scroll pass instead of mocking other ppl fr harmless fun. srry i type so shitty i guess. peace

[sydthefrog]

I just want retsuko to go batshit crazy already. I don't think i can stand another season of her sad office job life i need to see her rage and kill

[wetslug]

.

[tiafrye]

A Southern Hideaway

[hornetposting]

Hornet x Quirrel shippers really be like "But Lace tried to kill Hornet" and skip over the fact Hornet tried to fight Quirrel (most likely killing him had he not had monomons seal) in the comics 🤔 (Not saying all hornet x quirrel fans are like this, a few I know have said this)

I dont think hornet wouldve actually killed him but she CERTAINLY didnt want him to stay there. Theres also just honestly 0 chemistry between them like they really think theyd fit personality-wise?

[sadlazzle]

more like OK Diamond and Not Quite Shining Pearl

[cronchywaters]

uh oh, soda's drawing the ship that's "bland and has no substance to it"!!!! when will faer crimes against humanity end!!!!!!!!!

(reblogs r ok)

[cailann]

my drawings are floating around? im sorry wtf?

to be clear, i do not give a permission to reposting any of it. (also kinda dont get why anyone would but oh well)

you can use any of my drawings as your avatar or header, just please always ask and give credit. i do it for free and always will.. this is the only thing i ask from you.

thanks.

[00hj]

changbin while wearing a sheet with two holes, being denied candy cause “he’s too old for trick or treating”: ᶜᴼᴹᴱ ᴬᵀ ᴹᴱ ᴮᴿᴼ

[vuroguro]

i think i figured out why ppl who use he/him but are lesbian cis women bother me so much; it’s not the issue of “pronouns have gender” bcuz yeah as much as they have gendered expectations in society it’s not as if that matters. we be out here like “everything is made up and the genders don’t matter”

the reason is actually grates at me, as a trans guy, is bcuz i don’t get to do that. like, for example, you won’t catch a trans man or trans woman alive who just fuckinnnnn do that shit... and society wouldn’t accept me if i was a trans man but just. didn’t want to change my pronouns

going by different pronouns than those you were given at birth, speaking as a binary trans person, is a big deal and is usually the entire main staple behind issues of misgendering. the dysphoria inherit in being called the wrong pronouns is so huge that at least 80% of the comics about trans ppl i’ve seen make it the whole plot of the comic; it certainly feels like the whole plot in our lives

i have never, will never, and can never mind nonbinary folk of any sort who use any pronouns at all. i think since they’re trans, it never rubs me wrong. in my mind they know the feeling of being trans, so there’s no issue with if they go by any pronoun that helps them. regardless of if it’s a gendered, neutral, or even uncommon pronoun

but i see?? a lot of cis lesbians talk about their dysphoria, or who need to go by he/him pronouns and i get it. same hat. but it’s pretty novel for me to get around the idea of a cis person having gender dysphoria and even with that aside it’s almost impossible for me to accept someone who is cis, whose gender is the same as the one they were assigned at birth, who just wants to go by different pronouns. like it’s some novelty you can just put on bcuz you like how it sounds

“i’m a cis lesbian and i go by he/him”

that’s all well and good and i’m glad it helps you to use those pronouns but holy shit it kinda just looks like you’re trivializing things that trans folks go through if you just want it rather than need it

idk i’m just confused and salty and like 80 years old yelling about cis folks from my front yard...... i think i would probably be less confused if it were a drag thing bcuz i can at least wrap my lil head around drag queens/kings