#troy 2004

[metamorphesque]

Orlando Bloom as Paris of Troy in Troy (2004)

[penelope-from-ithica]

It’s always so funny when people go “I hate Rick Riordan for making people think—-“ or “Madeline miller got people mixed up about Circe” or epic, or even low hanging fruit like Troy 2004.

Usually, these creators didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not their fault people don’t research.

[elasticveins]

Could I get Patroclus and Achilles being HORRIFIED with how they're shown in that shitty Troy movie? Pretty please?

They’re tweaking.

[boromirswife]

Sean Bean as Odysseus in Troy (2004)

[streets-in-paradise]

I found another rare behind the scenes one.

[didanagy]

TROY (2004)

dir. wolfgang petersen

[miles-crow]

This is what happened 3200 years ago, right?

[themuseinthewoods]

Headcanons for asking the men of troy if you can ride their face.

Female reader. Married to the guys cause uh, ancient Greece.

18+ content

Achilles, Hector, Paris and Odysseus because Patroclus is a child. An innocent bean. Never.

So, this is my first time writing NSFW content so I am sorry it isn't good but it's an effort. A very explicit effort

NSFW under cut. This is embarrassing I feel like I should explain myself but have you seen these men?! Like have you?!

Achilles the things that this movie presented us with

I am already of the opinion that he sees your orgasm as an accomplishment

Ooh boy

I have a personal headcanon that he can and will throw you over his shoulder when he wants to do Satan's Ramba so he's gonna do that here

Might make you wait after promising to do so just to be an ass

But might I remind you that he is your ass

Grips your thighs while he ravishes you with his tongue and staring up at you with that fine face framed by your thighs

very pretty sight

Grip his hair and pull him closer and he will finally feel wanted for something other then fighting like you didn't want him for other things 🙄

Cocky bastard, will never let you live it down but at the same time he enjoys doing it to you

Likes giving you oral anyway so I'd say he's a 10/10

Hector bae

Okay so-

At first, he's flustered

Let's assume you blurt it out, cheeks flushed as you are embarrassed because of what you are requesting

But uh

You asked for it didn't you?

He has to please his queen, doesn't he? 😉

Well, are you going to be sore hehehe

But also, now he is kinda hooked on eating you out

Side rant!

he will come back from a stressful meeting or something and just lose himself in your thighs before he rams you into the bed

Back to main topic

Grips your thighs or hips when your above him

Might come up with an a system of hair pulling code so you can tell him what you want or need when he has you to much of a mess to speak

10/10, the looks he gives you from between your thighs 👀

Paris

ok, so ik I don't like Paris a lot as a character buttt, I understand the appeal okay? Orlando Bloom was in his prime

you think you are the one who suggests this?

Paris heard about it

And begged you to try it

Your worried about suffocating him but he assures you that it is fine

Full honesty, he isn't very good at first

But I'll be damned if he isn't a fast learner

Makes it his mission to become the best

Actively gets stronger from holding you up when you go weak from the sensations and his brother notices that his lil bro is suddenly a lil more built in the arms

That leads to some awkward conversations but Hector ain't telling, might be kind enough to give pointers though

is the kinda guy who would love a 69

9/10 because I think he might be a tad sloppy at first

Odysseus

This man does it to get something from you

could be information or help or anything really

At least the first time

But, he kinda starts to enjoy it

Questions everything

Comes up with different methods just because

Does it to "simulate his thoughts"

The only thing being stimulated is your clit-

so, uh yeah. Awkward coughing fit of embarrassment

8/10 because of the bs excuses

I'm tagging @streets-in-paradise because I really want her opinion lol. Her blog has more great stuff for Troy!

[claireverlasting]

Hey, um, sorry about your boyfriend, he can’t be your boyfriend anymore. Yeah both of you are now public domain and we’re making you related. Yeah we know what the author would think of this. Yeah we know about, yeah the audience. Anyway we think this is better than you two dating. Sorry

[miyetko]

reading Troy (2004) reviews that were written right after TSOA came out so now everyone thinks they’re an expert on The Iliad is so funny

“I can’t believe they made Patroklos and Achilles cousins!!! 😡”

I’m afraid I have some terrible news for you…

[metamorphesque]

im sorry but you cant make me like troy///

I'm not making you do anything — everyone’s entitled to their own taste and opinion. I just wanted to share mine, which is that I love Troy (2004) and personally consider it a great film.

[athenas-sw0rd]

Agamemnon: I never considered you a rival.

Achilles: I never considered you at all.

[m4el-1t0]

I love how David Benioff made Achilles and Patroclus direct cousins and made Patroclus' actor younger than Achilles' just to keep people from shipping them and then the movie comes out and people start making Brad Pitt and Eric Bana fuck each other in the ass

[sarafangirlart]

Achilles would never fucking say that in general but he’d especially never say that to Briseis.

Bellerophon’s on the other hand… it’s easier to imagine him saying that to Philonoe.

[streets-in-paradise]

Shotout to " those three dudes" period epics, one of my most favorite things ever.

Closely followed by " those three dudes" period adventure films.

[didanagy]

TROY (2004)

dir. wolfgang petersen